1 00:00:04,400 --> 00:00:09,280 Speaker 1: Hello everybody, and welcome back to the Psychology of Your Twenties, 2 00:00:09,920 --> 00:00:12,240 Speaker 1: the podcast where we talk through some of the big 3 00:00:12,480 --> 00:00:16,840 Speaker 1: life changes and transitions of our twenties and what they 4 00:00:16,960 --> 00:00:18,720 Speaker 1: mean for our psychology. 5 00:00:23,640 --> 00:00:26,840 Speaker 2: Hello everybody, or welcome back to the show, or welcome 6 00:00:26,880 --> 00:00:30,920 Speaker 2: back to the podcast. New listeners, old listeners, wherever you 7 00:00:30,960 --> 00:00:33,599 Speaker 2: are in the world, it is so great to have 8 00:00:33,640 --> 00:00:36,840 Speaker 2: you here back for another episode as we, of course 9 00:00:37,040 --> 00:00:43,320 Speaker 2: break down the Psychology of your twenties. Anxiety feels like 10 00:00:44,000 --> 00:00:46,279 Speaker 2: such a curse. I'm just going to come out and 11 00:00:46,320 --> 00:00:48,919 Speaker 2: say it. I think a lot of us have probably 12 00:00:49,000 --> 00:00:52,320 Speaker 2: wished for a day where we weren't anxious, just one day. 13 00:00:52,479 --> 00:00:55,279 Speaker 2: What might that be like? Or we've considered, you know, 14 00:00:55,320 --> 00:00:57,800 Speaker 2: what our lives would look like if we weren't held 15 00:00:57,840 --> 00:01:02,200 Speaker 2: back by these hypothetical fears about what may or may 16 00:01:02,240 --> 00:01:06,000 Speaker 2: not happen, what others might think, what disasters await, what 17 00:01:06,160 --> 00:01:08,960 Speaker 2: terrible things could go wrong in our future. It is 18 00:01:09,560 --> 00:01:12,280 Speaker 2: a huge burden at times, even if it comes and 19 00:01:12,360 --> 00:01:17,160 Speaker 2: goes in waves. Me and my anxiety, my power, we 20 00:01:17,240 --> 00:01:22,360 Speaker 2: go way back. I remember distinctly, so clearly, having my 21 00:01:22,440 --> 00:01:25,559 Speaker 2: first effic panic attack about the movie The Never Ending 22 00:01:25,560 --> 00:01:27,600 Speaker 2: Story when I was eight years old at like a 23 00:01:27,640 --> 00:01:31,000 Speaker 2: school movie night, and since then, I've always had these 24 00:01:31,120 --> 00:01:35,080 Speaker 2: moments of just extreme panic and anxiety that can go 25 00:01:35,120 --> 00:01:38,160 Speaker 2: on for months or or just be this baseline of 26 00:01:38,240 --> 00:01:41,440 Speaker 2: just nervousness for kind of as long as I can remember. 27 00:01:41,959 --> 00:01:44,560 Speaker 2: I think I said in a recent episode that there 28 00:01:44,560 --> 00:01:48,240 Speaker 2: have even been times in my life when I've worried 29 00:01:48,840 --> 00:01:52,280 Speaker 2: about the fact that I'm not anxious about anything, which 30 00:01:52,320 --> 00:01:56,720 Speaker 2: is absolutely bizarre. I really begun to, you know, realize 31 00:01:56,720 --> 00:02:01,040 Speaker 2: that my anxiety was almost comforting in a strange way. 32 00:02:01,120 --> 00:02:05,640 Speaker 2: It provided me with an illusion of security that felt 33 00:02:05,680 --> 00:02:09,320 Speaker 2: quite nice, when actually, although it was making me feel nice, 34 00:02:09,440 --> 00:02:12,480 Speaker 2: was making me feel like I could anticipate every single 35 00:02:12,520 --> 00:02:15,360 Speaker 2: problem that would happen in my life. A that wasn't 36 00:02:15,360 --> 00:02:18,120 Speaker 2: the case. Things happened that I never could have thought of, 37 00:02:18,760 --> 00:02:22,320 Speaker 2: and B it was actually taking away from a lot 38 00:02:22,360 --> 00:02:25,160 Speaker 2: of my experiences and a lot of the joyful experiences 39 00:02:25,680 --> 00:02:28,680 Speaker 2: that made up for the anxious ones. You know, I 40 00:02:28,840 --> 00:02:32,919 Speaker 2: would just sit with my anxious thoughts and try and 41 00:02:33,000 --> 00:02:35,560 Speaker 2: problem solve them, which I think is something that we've 42 00:02:35,600 --> 00:02:39,600 Speaker 2: all done. I would try and think my way through 43 00:02:39,800 --> 00:02:43,680 Speaker 2: a scenario that in you know, is completely irrational, and 44 00:02:43,720 --> 00:02:46,160 Speaker 2: that is just never going to work, because even when, 45 00:02:46,520 --> 00:02:48,840 Speaker 2: on the rare occasion I would get through it, my 46 00:02:48,960 --> 00:02:51,720 Speaker 2: brain would just present me with a bigger and even 47 00:02:51,800 --> 00:02:56,800 Speaker 2: trickier hypothetical. So it felt quite never ending. And then 48 00:02:56,840 --> 00:03:00,200 Speaker 2: a few years back, I started doing things differently. I 49 00:03:00,240 --> 00:03:06,680 Speaker 2: stopped letting my anxiety kind of be the loudest voice 50 00:03:07,280 --> 00:03:10,080 Speaker 2: in the room. I stopped letting it, you know, always 51 00:03:10,160 --> 00:03:12,839 Speaker 2: be in control. And I kind of started finding ways 52 00:03:12,880 --> 00:03:15,960 Speaker 2: to almost play with my anxious thoughts, to like beat 53 00:03:16,000 --> 00:03:19,640 Speaker 2: them at their own game, combining what I knew scientifically 54 00:03:19,720 --> 00:03:23,400 Speaker 2: and psychologically about anxiety and how it operates, but also 55 00:03:23,440 --> 00:03:26,360 Speaker 2: by kind of playing these mind games, these mind tricks 56 00:03:26,919 --> 00:03:32,720 Speaker 2: and establishing like some pretty really really useful tricks and 57 00:03:33,560 --> 00:03:39,280 Speaker 2: tips and strategies through trial and error, and what actually 58 00:03:39,280 --> 00:03:42,320 Speaker 2: made me feel better. Did require a little bit of work, 59 00:03:42,680 --> 00:03:46,600 Speaker 2: but it really helped me change my thinking from anxiety 60 00:03:46,640 --> 00:03:50,400 Speaker 2: as a burden to anxiety is something that is a 61 00:03:50,400 --> 00:03:52,960 Speaker 2: part of me that I can make work for me, 62 00:03:53,240 --> 00:03:57,320 Speaker 2: that I can leverage in some small way. And that's 63 00:03:57,360 --> 00:03:59,840 Speaker 2: exactly what I want to talk about today. Four of 64 00:03:59,840 --> 00:04:02,560 Speaker 2: them there ways that I've really been able to make 65 00:04:02,680 --> 00:04:06,480 Speaker 2: anxiety work for me, even in really really tough times, 66 00:04:06,600 --> 00:04:12,200 Speaker 2: terrible times, really panicky, anxious times, these strategies have been 67 00:04:12,320 --> 00:04:17,200 Speaker 2: like my greatest tools, and recently I've really had to 68 00:04:17,240 --> 00:04:20,080 Speaker 2: put them to the test again and slowly but surely 69 00:04:20,200 --> 00:04:22,640 Speaker 2: they have helped me out of a tough situation. So 70 00:04:23,040 --> 00:04:24,760 Speaker 2: I wanted to share it with you. I hope that 71 00:04:24,800 --> 00:04:27,839 Speaker 2: you can learn something. All of these tips are really 72 00:04:28,320 --> 00:04:32,279 Speaker 2: practical and accessible. You could literally try them all today 73 00:04:32,320 --> 00:04:35,119 Speaker 2: if you wanted, so I really hope it at least 74 00:04:35,839 --> 00:04:38,360 Speaker 2: changes how you think about your anxious thoughts, even if 75 00:04:38,360 --> 00:04:41,840 Speaker 2: it doesn't change your life. Without further ado, let's get 76 00:04:41,839 --> 00:04:45,599 Speaker 2: into the four ways that we can make anxiety work 77 00:04:45,720 --> 00:04:54,320 Speaker 2: for us. Having a refresher on what anxiety actually is 78 00:04:54,400 --> 00:04:58,200 Speaker 2: might sound really simple to begin with, but sometimes when 79 00:04:58,240 --> 00:05:01,000 Speaker 2: we're really wrapped up in our fears and our panic 80 00:05:01,040 --> 00:05:04,920 Speaker 2: and our worry, we think that our anxiety means more 81 00:05:04,920 --> 00:05:08,280 Speaker 2: than it does, and we really need to be firstly 82 00:05:08,920 --> 00:05:11,880 Speaker 2: grounded in the fact, grounded in the facts of what 83 00:05:11,920 --> 00:05:15,520 Speaker 2: we're going through. You may think you know all the 84 00:05:15,560 --> 00:05:18,039 Speaker 2: information about anxiety. There is a lot to know, and 85 00:05:18,040 --> 00:05:20,160 Speaker 2: you probably do know quite a bit, But when you're 86 00:05:20,200 --> 00:05:24,200 Speaker 2: operating from a place of survival and pure fear. Your 87 00:05:24,240 --> 00:05:29,000 Speaker 2: ability to actually remember this valuable information becomes quite clouded. 88 00:05:29,320 --> 00:05:31,920 Speaker 2: You know, you're just not thinking straight. And we think 89 00:05:31,960 --> 00:05:35,200 Speaker 2: in those moments that our anxiety is much more valid 90 00:05:35,720 --> 00:05:39,200 Speaker 2: than it is, that we should believe every single thought 91 00:05:39,240 --> 00:05:42,880 Speaker 2: that passes through our brains, that every opinion made up 92 00:05:42,880 --> 00:05:48,000 Speaker 2: situation could be true, because we've been hardwired to prioritize 93 00:05:48,040 --> 00:05:52,159 Speaker 2: thoughts that relate to our survival, that relate to fear, 94 00:05:52,640 --> 00:05:55,960 Speaker 2: that have an emotional tone to them, even if they're 95 00:05:55,960 --> 00:06:00,440 Speaker 2: actually not that useful. I think, essentially trust that our 96 00:06:00,560 --> 00:06:04,200 Speaker 2: mind and our body in a certain extent, must be 97 00:06:04,320 --> 00:06:07,520 Speaker 2: doing what it thinks is best. It must know what's best. 98 00:06:07,600 --> 00:06:11,040 Speaker 2: It must be making us pay attention to these hypotheticals 99 00:06:11,440 --> 00:06:14,400 Speaker 2: because we are in real danger. But what we need 100 00:06:14,440 --> 00:06:19,600 Speaker 2: to realize is that our trust is misplaced. Because anxiety's job, 101 00:06:20,120 --> 00:06:22,159 Speaker 2: and this might shock you, maybe it won't, but an 102 00:06:22,200 --> 00:06:26,120 Speaker 2: anxiety's job is to be irrational. That is literally its job. 103 00:06:26,640 --> 00:06:29,480 Speaker 2: It is to present us with the worst case scenarios, 104 00:06:29,960 --> 00:06:34,080 Speaker 2: to catastrophize, to stress, to project, not to be truthful. 105 00:06:34,240 --> 00:06:36,760 Speaker 2: That is not part of its job description. It's not 106 00:06:36,880 --> 00:06:40,800 Speaker 2: to see a situation realistically. And why exactly is that 107 00:06:40,880 --> 00:06:44,600 Speaker 2: the case. Well, because anxiety is your body and your 108 00:06:44,640 --> 00:06:49,240 Speaker 2: brain trying to protect you against a perceived threat or 109 00:06:49,279 --> 00:06:55,680 Speaker 2: a stressful situation, often by exaggerating an outcome or exaggerating 110 00:06:56,120 --> 00:06:59,120 Speaker 2: the reality of the situation to you know, either a 111 00:06:59,400 --> 00:07:02,120 Speaker 2: help motivate you or be try and get you to 112 00:07:02,200 --> 00:07:06,480 Speaker 2: problem solve before the situation occurs. You know, I often 113 00:07:07,360 --> 00:07:10,240 Speaker 2: think about anxiety like your mind trying to give you 114 00:07:10,280 --> 00:07:13,920 Speaker 2: a practice exam. But all the questions and scenarios are 115 00:07:14,120 --> 00:07:17,240 Speaker 2: questions and scenarios that you'd never actually encounter in the 116 00:07:17,280 --> 00:07:20,400 Speaker 2: real world or in the real exam, and they're often 117 00:07:20,480 --> 00:07:23,160 Speaker 2: impossible to answer. They'll never show up in real life. 118 00:07:23,640 --> 00:07:27,080 Speaker 2: And all the while you're convincing yourself or your anxiety 119 00:07:27,160 --> 00:07:29,960 Speaker 2: is convincing you you know, this isn't a practice exam. 120 00:07:30,000 --> 00:07:32,280 Speaker 2: This is the real deal. You have to take this seriously. 121 00:07:32,760 --> 00:07:36,400 Speaker 2: This could actually be happening right now, you know. Take 122 00:07:36,440 --> 00:07:40,560 Speaker 2: feeling anxious about the future. What you're really experiencing is 123 00:07:40,800 --> 00:07:43,720 Speaker 2: a fear of uncertainty because there is a lot you 124 00:07:43,760 --> 00:07:46,400 Speaker 2: don't know. You might not know how your career is 125 00:07:46,440 --> 00:07:48,800 Speaker 2: going to turn out. You might not know whether that 126 00:07:48,880 --> 00:07:51,640 Speaker 2: big risk will pay off, whether you're going to meet 127 00:07:51,680 --> 00:07:54,720 Speaker 2: your people, whether you're going to find love. So there 128 00:07:54,800 --> 00:07:56,920 Speaker 2: is a lot of empty space, There are a lot 129 00:07:56,920 --> 00:08:01,680 Speaker 2: of unknowns. Our anxiety likes to feel that space with 130 00:08:01,840 --> 00:08:05,160 Speaker 2: the worst case scenario to basically say, okay, well, if 131 00:08:05,240 --> 00:08:08,640 Speaker 2: you can handle this, if you have a plan, then 132 00:08:09,120 --> 00:08:12,760 Speaker 2: we'll be fine if it comes true. Here's the thing, though, 133 00:08:13,440 --> 00:08:19,160 Speaker 2: those scenarios rarely, if not ever, come true. The scenario 134 00:08:19,440 --> 00:08:22,280 Speaker 2: in which you lose everything in a fire and you 135 00:08:22,360 --> 00:08:24,560 Speaker 2: make a huge mistake at work and you never get 136 00:08:24,600 --> 00:08:27,320 Speaker 2: a job again and all your loved ones die, that 137 00:08:27,440 --> 00:08:30,120 Speaker 2: isn't going to come true. The fear of you know, 138 00:08:30,200 --> 00:08:33,360 Speaker 2: suddenly being diagnosed with a rare disease when you are 139 00:08:33,360 --> 00:08:36,960 Speaker 2: otherwise healthy, that isn't going to come true. Or you know, 140 00:08:37,080 --> 00:08:41,320 Speaker 2: your thought that everyone secretly dislikes you, you've somehow said 141 00:08:41,360 --> 00:08:44,439 Speaker 2: something to upset all your close friends without anyone mentioning it. 142 00:08:45,000 --> 00:08:47,520 Speaker 2: That is false. It's not going to come true. It 143 00:08:47,640 --> 00:08:51,439 Speaker 2: is your brain serving you up scenarios to give you 144 00:08:51,520 --> 00:08:56,880 Speaker 2: a really vigorous mental and physical workout, so if they 145 00:08:56,960 --> 00:08:59,920 Speaker 2: were to happen, you would be okay because you've already 146 00:09:00,000 --> 00:09:05,840 Speaker 2: experienced the anxiety towards this situation beforehand. Hopefully that makes 147 00:09:05,840 --> 00:09:07,679 Speaker 2: a lot of sense to you. I think when we 148 00:09:07,760 --> 00:09:10,559 Speaker 2: begin to acknowledge that this is our brain trying to 149 00:09:10,600 --> 00:09:13,520 Speaker 2: protect us but just not doing a very great job 150 00:09:14,000 --> 00:09:17,320 Speaker 2: or being very helpful at all, we see our situation 151 00:09:17,400 --> 00:09:21,280 Speaker 2: a bit more clearly. And it has always always helped 152 00:09:21,280 --> 00:09:25,119 Speaker 2: me to remind myself that my opinion about a situation 153 00:09:25,400 --> 00:09:28,959 Speaker 2: is just an opinion, nothing more, nothing less. There's often 154 00:09:29,320 --> 00:09:33,040 Speaker 2: very little evidence for what I'm thinking, and as much 155 00:09:33,120 --> 00:09:35,720 Speaker 2: as I try, you know, I can't tell the future. 156 00:09:35,920 --> 00:09:39,200 Speaker 2: I'm not I don't have that rare magical ability. I 157 00:09:39,240 --> 00:09:42,520 Speaker 2: cannot anticipate how this will work out, So I just 158 00:09:42,559 --> 00:09:45,520 Speaker 2: have to be accepting of what comes. Of course, you 159 00:09:45,559 --> 00:09:48,599 Speaker 2: know that's very easy to think. But when your anxiety 160 00:09:48,640 --> 00:09:52,839 Speaker 2: is accompanied by a number of physical symptoms like shaking, 161 00:09:52,960 --> 00:09:57,120 Speaker 2: like a rapid heartbeat, shortness of breath, trembling, nausea, sweating, 162 00:09:57,600 --> 00:10:01,839 Speaker 2: or that feeling of disassociation or being unreal, it can 163 00:10:01,880 --> 00:10:06,520 Speaker 2: become even more unpleasant. And I will say it makes 164 00:10:06,520 --> 00:10:11,400 Speaker 2: it feel a lot more immediate. As much as those 165 00:10:11,440 --> 00:10:15,280 Speaker 2: thoughts may not be true, what you're going through certainly 166 00:10:15,400 --> 00:10:18,559 Speaker 2: is the physical feeling you're going through is very real. 167 00:10:19,160 --> 00:10:23,520 Speaker 2: Whether that is displayed through panic attacks, through like consistent 168 00:10:23,679 --> 00:10:29,160 Speaker 2: underlying anxiety, or just intrusive, repetitive thoughts, it is definitely 169 00:10:29,160 --> 00:10:31,920 Speaker 2: not a comfortable experience. I don't think anyone is like, 170 00:10:32,000 --> 00:10:35,040 Speaker 2: oh yeah, I love feeling anxious. That's one of my favorites. 171 00:10:35,640 --> 00:10:38,360 Speaker 2: And I'm not going to be like some guru who's 172 00:10:38,360 --> 00:10:40,120 Speaker 2: going to sell you snake oil and say that I 173 00:10:40,120 --> 00:10:43,760 Speaker 2: can make that go away immediately or that I can 174 00:10:43,920 --> 00:10:46,440 Speaker 2: cure you. But what I do want to talk about 175 00:10:46,559 --> 00:10:50,760 Speaker 2: is four ways that we can take that feeling and 176 00:10:50,800 --> 00:10:53,360 Speaker 2: not just completely eliminate it, but make it work for us, 177 00:10:54,000 --> 00:10:58,480 Speaker 2: and make do leverage the anxious hand, the anxious mind 178 00:10:58,520 --> 00:11:01,000 Speaker 2: that you've been dealt. You know, like I said before, 179 00:11:01,040 --> 00:11:03,520 Speaker 2: it's been at least sixteen years that I've kind of 180 00:11:03,960 --> 00:11:06,320 Speaker 2: been in the business of anxiety, but only in the 181 00:11:06,360 --> 00:11:09,680 Speaker 2: last like two to three that I've really started approaching 182 00:11:09,720 --> 00:11:13,480 Speaker 2: this tension, these feelings, these thoughts in a way that 183 00:11:13,640 --> 00:11:20,000 Speaker 2: initially felt so counterintuitive but actually which really really worked. 184 00:11:20,760 --> 00:11:23,880 Speaker 2: And that's the thing that I've learnt with anxiety that 185 00:11:23,960 --> 00:11:26,920 Speaker 2: I've found you kind of have to beat it at 186 00:11:26,960 --> 00:11:31,400 Speaker 2: its own game. And just be as irrational and delusional 187 00:11:31,440 --> 00:11:34,319 Speaker 2: in your belief that you'll be fine as your anxiety 188 00:11:34,440 --> 00:11:36,840 Speaker 2: is a rational and delusional in its belief that the 189 00:11:36,840 --> 00:11:40,520 Speaker 2: world is falling apart. You need to be just as 190 00:11:40,520 --> 00:11:45,240 Speaker 2: persistent as your anxiety is and just as imaginative. But 191 00:11:45,280 --> 00:11:46,920 Speaker 2: the thing is is that you already know that you 192 00:11:46,920 --> 00:11:50,040 Speaker 2: can be all those things, because your anxiety is displaying 193 00:11:50,040 --> 00:11:54,360 Speaker 2: that you have that capability. So you can use the 194 00:11:54,400 --> 00:11:57,080 Speaker 2: methods that your anxiety is using to scare you to 195 00:11:57,200 --> 00:12:00,320 Speaker 2: kind of scare it back. This really brings me to 196 00:12:00,640 --> 00:12:03,480 Speaker 2: the first way that I've stopped fighting my anxiety and 197 00:12:03,520 --> 00:12:05,839 Speaker 2: really made it work for me, And that is really 198 00:12:05,920 --> 00:12:10,440 Speaker 2: tricking myself into believing that anytime I feel anxiety, it's 199 00:12:10,520 --> 00:12:16,240 Speaker 2: actually just excitement, and choosing to label the sensations differently 200 00:12:16,480 --> 00:12:19,640 Speaker 2: to how my mind wants to label them. If my 201 00:12:19,800 --> 00:12:23,280 Speaker 2: anxious mind wants to make things up, wants to label 202 00:12:23,360 --> 00:12:26,240 Speaker 2: things differently as a threat when they're not. If my 203 00:12:26,280 --> 00:12:29,319 Speaker 2: anxious mind wants to lie to me, well I can 204 00:12:29,360 --> 00:12:32,400 Speaker 2: lie right back. You know, it sounds like I'm fighting 205 00:12:32,440 --> 00:12:36,920 Speaker 2: this mortal enemy. But here's the thing. Right Like, there's 206 00:12:36,960 --> 00:12:40,800 Speaker 2: a perk, not so much a perk, but something unusual 207 00:12:40,840 --> 00:12:44,880 Speaker 2: about feeling anxious that works in our favor. Anxiety and 208 00:12:44,960 --> 00:12:50,520 Speaker 2: excitement are actually incredibly similar on so many dimensions, and 209 00:12:50,559 --> 00:12:54,240 Speaker 2: they tend to actually activate the same kind of arousal 210 00:12:54,320 --> 00:12:58,839 Speaker 2: pathways in our body. There's a really amazing article from 211 00:12:58,880 --> 00:13:03,439 Speaker 2: the Harvard Business School idled Get Excited, reappraising anxiety as excitement, 212 00:13:03,840 --> 00:13:08,160 Speaker 2: and it talks about how both anxiety and excitement are 213 00:13:10,080 --> 00:13:12,559 Speaker 2: or not knowing what to expect. They're based on high 214 00:13:12,640 --> 00:13:15,800 Speaker 2: levels of arousal, so basically meaning a similar level of 215 00:13:15,840 --> 00:13:20,360 Speaker 2: bodily response to a stimulus, and they're based on a 216 00:13:20,440 --> 00:13:25,160 Speaker 2: sense or a loss of control. When you're excited, you're 217 00:13:25,160 --> 00:13:28,880 Speaker 2: going to feel perhaps equally jittery, kind of nervous. You're 218 00:13:28,880 --> 00:13:31,199 Speaker 2: going to feel your heart rate go up. Maybe all 219 00:13:31,240 --> 00:13:34,920 Speaker 2: these thoughts start swirling around about what is possible. That's 220 00:13:35,040 --> 00:13:38,640 Speaker 2: very similar to an anxious state. The only difference is 221 00:13:38,679 --> 00:13:44,040 Speaker 2: what we would call positive or negative valence. So valence 222 00:13:44,240 --> 00:13:47,960 Speaker 2: or valency is this idea in psychology that describes how 223 00:13:48,240 --> 00:13:53,040 Speaker 2: different emotions have a different emotional effect even if they 224 00:13:53,120 --> 00:13:56,480 Speaker 2: feel the same on a physical level. So anxiety and 225 00:13:56,520 --> 00:13:59,600 Speaker 2: excitement they feel the same on a physical level. But 226 00:13:59,600 --> 00:14:05,160 Speaker 2: anxinxiety has a negative valance, whereas excitement has a positive valance, 227 00:14:05,240 --> 00:14:10,040 Speaker 2: meaning that the emotional effect of excitement is appealing, it's desirable, 228 00:14:10,080 --> 00:14:14,079 Speaker 2: it makes us more attracted to a situation, whereas anxiety 229 00:14:14,120 --> 00:14:17,640 Speaker 2: has that negative valance, it makes us scared, fearful, uncomfortable. 230 00:14:18,280 --> 00:14:23,360 Speaker 2: So I want you to tap into that positive emotional valency. 231 00:14:23,400 --> 00:14:26,480 Speaker 2: If the only thing that is different is how we 232 00:14:26,520 --> 00:14:31,160 Speaker 2: interpret a feeling, then tell yourself, actually, I'm excited by 233 00:14:31,200 --> 00:14:35,440 Speaker 2: this feeling. This is an anxiety. This is excitement about 234 00:14:35,480 --> 00:14:37,920 Speaker 2: how this is going to turn out. I'm excited to 235 00:14:37,960 --> 00:14:40,680 Speaker 2: see how I manage this. I'm excited to be able 236 00:14:40,680 --> 00:14:44,120 Speaker 2: to have this human experience. And you know, I used 237 00:14:44,160 --> 00:14:47,080 Speaker 2: this technique a lot when I was getting over my 238 00:14:47,120 --> 00:14:52,080 Speaker 2: fear of flying. I would get incredibly panicked, especially during takeoff, 239 00:14:52,320 --> 00:14:55,720 Speaker 2: and so I would just keep repeating that, you know, 240 00:14:55,840 --> 00:14:59,600 Speaker 2: this is actually an excited feeling. I'm excited by this feeling. 241 00:15:00,080 --> 00:15:03,480 Speaker 2: This is not anxiety. These are butterflies. This is not adrenaline, 242 00:15:03,600 --> 00:15:07,640 Speaker 2: its enthusiasm. And that same research paper from Harvard that 243 00:15:07,680 --> 00:15:11,920 Speaker 2: I referenced before actually concluded that using this technique can 244 00:15:11,960 --> 00:15:16,240 Speaker 2: improve our performance like a lot in certain situations, especially 245 00:15:16,240 --> 00:15:19,440 Speaker 2: when it comes to things to do with social anxiety, 246 00:15:19,640 --> 00:15:24,240 Speaker 2: public speaking, specific phobia situations, And it's a much better 247 00:15:24,280 --> 00:15:28,080 Speaker 2: strategy if you then trying to just completely shut down 248 00:15:28,120 --> 00:15:33,160 Speaker 2: our anxiety completely, because going from anxious to calm is 249 00:15:33,240 --> 00:15:36,240 Speaker 2: a lot harder. There are a lot more nuances and 250 00:15:36,280 --> 00:15:41,800 Speaker 2: differences compared from compared to going from anxious to excited, 251 00:15:41,880 --> 00:15:44,000 Speaker 2: because they are on the same kind of end of 252 00:15:44,040 --> 00:15:47,840 Speaker 2: the spectrum. That is Tip number one. But we're going 253 00:15:47,920 --> 00:15:49,840 Speaker 2: to take a short break. I hope that you stay 254 00:15:49,880 --> 00:15:52,640 Speaker 2: with us, and I hope that you're excited for the 255 00:15:52,680 --> 00:15:55,880 Speaker 2: next three strategies I have for you when we're back. 256 00:16:01,040 --> 00:16:03,760 Speaker 2: The easiest way to tell if something is an anxious 257 00:16:03,800 --> 00:16:08,200 Speaker 2: thought is when it starts with what if? What if 258 00:16:08,240 --> 00:16:11,920 Speaker 2: the world collapses? What if my worst fear comes true? 259 00:16:11,960 --> 00:16:14,680 Speaker 2: What if I never achieve what I want? What if 260 00:16:14,720 --> 00:16:18,040 Speaker 2: I lose it all? A true fear something that is 261 00:16:18,120 --> 00:16:21,960 Speaker 2: actually dangerous in the moment wouldn't require that what if 262 00:16:22,040 --> 00:16:24,640 Speaker 2: prefix because you would know what was happening. It would 263 00:16:24,640 --> 00:16:27,240 Speaker 2: be happening right now in the moment. And this is 264 00:16:27,280 --> 00:16:31,400 Speaker 2: really valuable to pay attention to because the moment you 265 00:16:31,520 --> 00:16:36,120 Speaker 2: find yourself spiraling overthinking, getting repetitive with your thoughts, and 266 00:16:36,160 --> 00:16:39,640 Speaker 2: they all start with what if that is anxiety? That 267 00:16:39,800 --> 00:16:43,720 Speaker 2: is not reality, It's a thought, not a fact. Here's 268 00:16:43,880 --> 00:16:46,640 Speaker 2: how you can make this work for you Again, what 269 00:16:46,680 --> 00:16:50,080 Speaker 2: you're really fearing here is the unknown. And it's not 270 00:16:50,200 --> 00:16:53,760 Speaker 2: uncommon for us to have, you know, five six seven 271 00:16:54,280 --> 00:16:57,160 Speaker 2: different hypotheticals about what could happen, or going at once 272 00:16:57,360 --> 00:17:01,880 Speaker 2: or swirling around or feeling equally scared and unlikely. What 273 00:17:01,920 --> 00:17:06,000 Speaker 2: we forget to realize is that they can't all possibly 274 00:17:06,080 --> 00:17:10,240 Speaker 2: come true. But yet we feel bombarded with an almost 275 00:17:10,880 --> 00:17:15,639 Speaker 2: cumulative worry right that each of these hypotheticals could be 276 00:17:15,640 --> 00:17:17,879 Speaker 2: a possibility. And that's one of the first ways that 277 00:17:17,920 --> 00:17:20,320 Speaker 2: we see that anxiety is a really, really irrational because 278 00:17:20,320 --> 00:17:23,200 Speaker 2: that's not possible. And I want you to fight these 279 00:17:23,320 --> 00:17:27,280 Speaker 2: unknowns with nones. Yes, you don't know how the future 280 00:17:27,320 --> 00:17:29,520 Speaker 2: will pan out or what will happen in this situation, 281 00:17:30,240 --> 00:17:32,760 Speaker 2: but you do know a lot of things, and you 282 00:17:32,840 --> 00:17:35,560 Speaker 2: are certain of a lot of things. You know that 283 00:17:35,600 --> 00:17:39,119 Speaker 2: you are capable, you know that you've survived every situation 284 00:17:39,160 --> 00:17:42,720 Speaker 2: you've been in before. You know that this is just anxiety. 285 00:17:43,240 --> 00:17:45,680 Speaker 2: What else do you know? You do know that your 286 00:17:45,720 --> 00:17:48,919 Speaker 2: fears rarely ever come true. You do know that you 287 00:17:48,960 --> 00:17:51,760 Speaker 2: are not alone. You do know that you you know 288 00:17:51,840 --> 00:17:53,800 Speaker 2: many others have been through this and come out the 289 00:17:53,840 --> 00:17:57,720 Speaker 2: other side. There is one uncertainty. The uncertainty is what's 290 00:17:57,760 --> 00:18:00,000 Speaker 2: going to happen in this situation, what's going to happen next? 291 00:18:00,880 --> 00:18:04,040 Speaker 2: But there are many, many certainties, and that is what 292 00:18:04,080 --> 00:18:06,120 Speaker 2: I want you to focus on. What you do know, 293 00:18:06,200 --> 00:18:08,399 Speaker 2: what you are certain of, compared to what you are 294 00:18:08,480 --> 00:18:11,480 Speaker 2: uncertain of, and see how like the certainties end up 295 00:18:11,520 --> 00:18:15,520 Speaker 2: stacking up in your favor. Here's a really great visualization 296 00:18:15,680 --> 00:18:19,560 Speaker 2: exercise that I use with this as well, is I 297 00:18:19,680 --> 00:18:24,359 Speaker 2: like pretend that I'm holding these certainties in my hand, 298 00:18:24,480 --> 00:18:28,359 Speaker 2: and they are these big golden orbs, these big, like 299 00:18:28,480 --> 00:18:34,479 Speaker 2: weird golden balls, and I like mentally throw them at 300 00:18:34,680 --> 00:18:37,879 Speaker 2: my fears, at my anxious thoughts. And I think about 301 00:18:37,920 --> 00:18:42,000 Speaker 2: the fears as like this big shadowy, you know, shadowy figure, 302 00:18:42,520 --> 00:18:45,520 Speaker 2: and I'm throwing these big certainty golden orbs at them, 303 00:18:45,520 --> 00:18:48,680 Speaker 2: and they're just crashing through this shadow, making it smaller 304 00:18:48,720 --> 00:18:52,879 Speaker 2: and smaller and smaller, making it fall apart until it's gone. 305 00:18:53,600 --> 00:18:58,000 Speaker 2: And these certainties really pierce through that uncertainty, both in 306 00:18:58,119 --> 00:19:01,399 Speaker 2: like the visualization, but also in your life, like you 307 00:19:01,480 --> 00:19:04,240 Speaker 2: really start to believe that, yes, you do know that 308 00:19:04,280 --> 00:19:06,600 Speaker 2: this is going to pass. You do know that there 309 00:19:06,640 --> 00:19:09,200 Speaker 2: are all these factual things that you can rely on. 310 00:19:09,680 --> 00:19:12,320 Speaker 2: You do know at the very least, that you trust 311 00:19:12,359 --> 00:19:15,040 Speaker 2: yourself to get through this. That is something that you 312 00:19:15,040 --> 00:19:18,080 Speaker 2: are absolutely sure of. The reason that I find this 313 00:19:18,200 --> 00:19:20,879 Speaker 2: so effective is because it gives me the opportunity to 314 00:19:21,720 --> 00:19:26,359 Speaker 2: remember that I am capable no matter what situation I encounter. Again, 315 00:19:26,600 --> 00:19:30,400 Speaker 2: anxiety's job is to be irrational, but so often afterwards 316 00:19:30,520 --> 00:19:34,080 Speaker 2: we never get the opportunity to remember what it was 317 00:19:34,119 --> 00:19:36,959 Speaker 2: we were fearing because it doesn't come true. So anxiety's 318 00:19:37,040 --> 00:19:39,320 Speaker 2: job is really to torment us, not to give us 319 00:19:39,359 --> 00:19:43,600 Speaker 2: factual scenarios that we actually are going to encounter. You 320 00:19:43,640 --> 00:19:48,119 Speaker 2: can instead use this situation to learn about yourself, to 321 00:19:48,280 --> 00:19:52,280 Speaker 2: reinforce that you are confident that you trust yourself, rather 322 00:19:52,320 --> 00:19:55,119 Speaker 2: than trusting your anxiety. And you've got to remember a 323 00:19:55,160 --> 00:19:58,160 Speaker 2: lot of people don't get tested this way. A lot 324 00:19:58,160 --> 00:20:02,840 Speaker 2: of people go through life just assuming things. And you're 325 00:20:02,880 --> 00:20:07,880 Speaker 2: someone who is going to instead take that discomfort, take 326 00:20:08,320 --> 00:20:11,600 Speaker 2: all those situations in which you felt fear and really 327 00:20:11,640 --> 00:20:13,560 Speaker 2: pay attention to the fact that you got through it, 328 00:20:14,200 --> 00:20:17,440 Speaker 2: and really remember that for the future, that you are 329 00:20:17,480 --> 00:20:21,199 Speaker 2: an incredibly strong person to be facing a battle that 330 00:20:21,320 --> 00:20:26,640 Speaker 2: is originating from you, that is originating from the deepest 331 00:20:26,680 --> 00:20:30,560 Speaker 2: fears that you could possibly encounter. Being made to feel real. 332 00:20:31,040 --> 00:20:35,200 Speaker 2: I just think you will experience true pride and joy 333 00:20:35,280 --> 00:20:38,320 Speaker 2: that you persevere, and I want you to have that experience. 334 00:20:38,359 --> 00:20:41,320 Speaker 2: I want you to make that happen for yourself. Now. 335 00:20:41,440 --> 00:20:44,040 Speaker 2: The third way that I make anxiety work for me 336 00:20:44,280 --> 00:20:48,399 Speaker 2: rather than against me is by personifying my anxiety as 337 00:20:48,480 --> 00:20:52,159 Speaker 2: something that isn't threatening. So my mum was actually the 338 00:20:52,160 --> 00:20:55,520 Speaker 2: one who really inspired me to kind of start thinking 339 00:20:55,600 --> 00:20:58,600 Speaker 2: about my anxiety this way because of something that she 340 00:20:58,720 --> 00:21:00,480 Speaker 2: said to me once when I was really really stuck. 341 00:21:00,600 --> 00:21:02,720 Speaker 2: You know, she's seen me kind of battle with some 342 00:21:02,760 --> 00:21:05,960 Speaker 2: pretty existential fears for a long time, and one day 343 00:21:06,000 --> 00:21:08,959 Speaker 2: she was like, the fears you have now are no 344 00:21:09,080 --> 00:21:11,760 Speaker 2: different to when you were a kid and you were 345 00:21:11,760 --> 00:21:13,920 Speaker 2: scared of the boogeyman or you were scared of the 346 00:21:13,960 --> 00:21:16,840 Speaker 2: monster in your closet. You know, it's just all smoke, right, 347 00:21:16,920 --> 00:21:20,520 Speaker 2: And thinking about my anxiety is this tangible thing that 348 00:21:21,359 --> 00:21:25,600 Speaker 2: wasn't scary, except for in my imagination turned a lot 349 00:21:25,640 --> 00:21:28,879 Speaker 2: of it around for me. So now I try to 350 00:21:28,920 --> 00:21:32,159 Speaker 2: personify my anxiety as this is so strange, but as 351 00:21:32,200 --> 00:21:35,040 Speaker 2: Boo from Monsters Inc. Now, if you've ever seen that movie, 352 00:21:35,080 --> 00:21:37,960 Speaker 2: it's a classic. I'm assuming that you have. But you know, 353 00:21:38,000 --> 00:21:39,960 Speaker 2: Boo is the little girl and when she's she's like 354 00:21:40,000 --> 00:21:43,159 Speaker 2: wearing this little monster costume and she jumps out and 355 00:21:43,200 --> 00:21:46,800 Speaker 2: she goes like Boo and obviously, like Sully and Mike 356 00:21:46,800 --> 00:21:50,000 Speaker 2: Wazowski like get really really scared, But it's like it's 357 00:21:50,040 --> 00:21:51,960 Speaker 2: just a little kid, right, And that's how I like 358 00:21:52,000 --> 00:21:55,040 Speaker 2: to imagine my anxiety trying to scare me, like a 359 00:21:55,080 --> 00:21:57,960 Speaker 2: little kid that's like playing and I'm like playing along 360 00:21:57,960 --> 00:21:59,640 Speaker 2: with them, and they're like Boo, and I'm like, oh, 361 00:21:59,760 --> 00:22:03,720 Speaker 2: I'm so terrified. How scary. But really I can see 362 00:22:03,720 --> 00:22:06,920 Speaker 2: that it's just this little harmless being, this little thing 363 00:22:07,560 --> 00:22:10,359 Speaker 2: that is, you know, not actually going to hurt me, 364 00:22:10,960 --> 00:22:14,040 Speaker 2: because you know, really your anxiety is just like a 365 00:22:14,040 --> 00:22:17,040 Speaker 2: little kid playing make believe. It can't jump out and 366 00:22:17,119 --> 00:22:19,560 Speaker 2: rip off your limbs, it can't pull your hair, it 367 00:22:19,560 --> 00:22:23,280 Speaker 2: can't do anything to you externally. It is a feeling 368 00:22:23,520 --> 00:22:26,920 Speaker 2: and one that has originated from you, so it will 369 00:22:26,920 --> 00:22:30,280 Speaker 2: not harm you as uncomfortable as it feels. Giving it 370 00:22:30,320 --> 00:22:34,000 Speaker 2: a name, giving it a little costume, giving it an identity, 371 00:22:34,119 --> 00:22:37,639 Speaker 2: maybe it lets us remember what we're really dealing with. 372 00:22:37,720 --> 00:22:40,560 Speaker 2: Here is a boogeyman, or in my case, you know, 373 00:22:40,960 --> 00:22:43,119 Speaker 2: a little kid playing dress up who's trying to scare you. 374 00:22:44,040 --> 00:22:46,600 Speaker 2: This has the additional benefit of meaning that you can 375 00:22:46,680 --> 00:22:50,240 Speaker 2: kind of almost speak to your anxiety like it's a person, 376 00:22:50,880 --> 00:22:53,119 Speaker 2: Like it's you know, an annoying visitor in your house 377 00:22:53,320 --> 00:22:56,040 Speaker 2: or a little kid. You're asking it to leave. You're 378 00:22:56,080 --> 00:22:58,960 Speaker 2: in control, and you can kind of also tease it 379 00:22:59,000 --> 00:23:01,679 Speaker 2: and joke around with it and tell it to chill out. 380 00:23:02,040 --> 00:23:05,920 Speaker 2: One of my friends calls her anxiety Brian like brain, 381 00:23:06,040 --> 00:23:08,200 Speaker 2: but with the eye and the a swap to get 382 00:23:08,200 --> 00:23:11,040 Speaker 2: the picture. And she's so cute because she'll be like, oh, 383 00:23:11,119 --> 00:23:12,840 Speaker 2: you know, Brian is just holding us up today, so 384 00:23:12,840 --> 00:23:15,639 Speaker 2: I'm running a little bit late, or you know, Brian 385 00:23:15,800 --> 00:23:18,920 Speaker 2: is really overthinking this. Can you tell them to chill out? 386 00:23:19,040 --> 00:23:20,240 Speaker 2: Can you reassure me? 387 00:23:21,080 --> 00:23:21,359 Speaker 1: Now? 388 00:23:21,520 --> 00:23:23,640 Speaker 2: You know it's like if she needs to cancel plans, 389 00:23:23,760 --> 00:23:27,879 Speaker 2: she needs more information, she needs reassurance. It's not her 390 00:23:28,119 --> 00:23:31,119 Speaker 2: asking for it, it's Brian. Maybe in a way that 391 00:23:31,200 --> 00:23:34,159 Speaker 2: kind of reduces some of the stigma or the sense 392 00:23:34,200 --> 00:23:38,520 Speaker 2: that you're demanding or that you're the problem, because this 393 00:23:38,720 --> 00:23:42,600 Speaker 2: separation of you and your anxiety into a character makes 394 00:23:42,600 --> 00:23:45,399 Speaker 2: you realize that you are, in fact, not your anxiety. 395 00:23:45,840 --> 00:23:48,040 Speaker 2: You are just a person doing the best they can 396 00:23:48,160 --> 00:23:50,879 Speaker 2: with what they have and the hand that they've been dealt, 397 00:23:51,280 --> 00:23:54,680 Speaker 2: even if that hand involves a little friend who likes 398 00:23:54,720 --> 00:23:58,840 Speaker 2: to jump out and scare you. My final tip today 399 00:23:59,040 --> 00:24:03,280 Speaker 2: for making your anxiety work for you rather than against you, 400 00:24:03,320 --> 00:24:07,920 Speaker 2: for reprogramming our relationship with this state, is to take 401 00:24:07,960 --> 00:24:12,320 Speaker 2: the tension, take the hopelessness, take the nervousness, and channel 402 00:24:12,400 --> 00:24:16,760 Speaker 2: it into something creative. That energy you have has to 403 00:24:16,840 --> 00:24:20,080 Speaker 2: go somewhere, and yes, it can definitely be expressed through 404 00:24:20,119 --> 00:24:24,720 Speaker 2: tears or panic or muscle tension or trembling, but it 405 00:24:24,760 --> 00:24:29,760 Speaker 2: can also be expressed emotionally through creation. Now I'm not 406 00:24:29,800 --> 00:24:33,560 Speaker 2: saying production. I'm not saying to take all that nervous 407 00:24:33,720 --> 00:24:37,280 Speaker 2: energy and that false alarm focus and be productive and 408 00:24:37,760 --> 00:24:40,800 Speaker 2: work on your school project or whatever it is, or 409 00:24:40,800 --> 00:24:45,160 Speaker 2: work on your assignment or doing something that's necessarily helpful. 410 00:24:45,920 --> 00:24:49,919 Speaker 2: I'm saying be creative for a reason because what I 411 00:24:49,960 --> 00:24:54,119 Speaker 2: think really helps us process and anxiety is building something, 412 00:24:54,320 --> 00:24:57,879 Speaker 2: molding something for the sake of just making something beautiful. 413 00:24:58,760 --> 00:25:04,600 Speaker 2: Anxiety puts us in state of helplessness, scarcity, starkness, deficit. 414 00:25:05,440 --> 00:25:09,560 Speaker 2: We feel like life is kind of meaningless at times, 415 00:25:09,680 --> 00:25:13,160 Speaker 2: or like everything could be taken away from us. Our safety, 416 00:25:13,200 --> 00:25:18,560 Speaker 2: our lives are at risk. Creativity is the exact opposite painting, 417 00:25:19,160 --> 00:25:24,800 Speaker 2: buying four dollar clay from your craft store, knitting, building legos, scrapbooking, 418 00:25:24,880 --> 00:25:28,600 Speaker 2: diary entries, writing, poetry, whatever it is that shows abundance, 419 00:25:29,200 --> 00:25:32,400 Speaker 2: that shows healing, that shows that you can be in control. 420 00:25:32,560 --> 00:25:36,120 Speaker 2: You can put beautiful things back into the world and 421 00:25:36,240 --> 00:25:42,560 Speaker 2: channel again, yes, that anxiety, channel it into something meaningful 422 00:25:43,000 --> 00:25:47,720 Speaker 2: rather than something meaningless. I cite this paper all the time, 423 00:25:47,840 --> 00:25:50,560 Speaker 2: so for my regular listeners, I am going to sound 424 00:25:50,600 --> 00:25:53,359 Speaker 2: like a broken record. But a twenty twenty one paper 425 00:25:53,359 --> 00:25:56,640 Speaker 2: on the positive effects of creativity looked at over five 426 00:25:56,760 --> 00:26:00,239 Speaker 2: hundred adults who were asked to just engage in a 427 00:26:00,280 --> 00:26:04,439 Speaker 2: small creative task each day for less than ten minutes, 428 00:26:05,040 --> 00:26:11,239 Speaker 2: and after two weeks, their subjective wellbeing was measured and 429 00:26:11,280 --> 00:26:13,920 Speaker 2: what they found was that for those who were given 430 00:26:13,920 --> 00:26:19,400 Speaker 2: the direction to be creative, they were so much happier. 431 00:26:20,080 --> 00:26:23,240 Speaker 2: And the biggest area where the researchers saw a shift 432 00:26:24,040 --> 00:26:29,879 Speaker 2: was reduced anxiety. In my mind, anxiety is just energy, 433 00:26:30,640 --> 00:26:33,560 Speaker 2: and energy doesn't disappear. It needs a place to go, 434 00:26:33,720 --> 00:26:38,480 Speaker 2: it needs direction. When you begin to master your anxiety more, 435 00:26:39,040 --> 00:26:41,359 Speaker 2: you can kind of channel it in the ways that 436 00:26:41,400 --> 00:26:44,880 Speaker 2: you want, and creative expression is one of the easiest 437 00:26:44,880 --> 00:26:47,840 Speaker 2: ways to do that. Initially, you take that energy that 438 00:26:47,960 --> 00:26:50,639 Speaker 2: is all yours, It is yours to use, and you 439 00:26:50,800 --> 00:26:55,560 Speaker 2: use it to create, to expand, to build, rather than 440 00:26:55,880 --> 00:26:59,359 Speaker 2: to let your anxiety convince you that nothing changes or 441 00:26:59,359 --> 00:27:02,960 Speaker 2: your fears come true. They won't, I promise. This is 442 00:27:03,080 --> 00:27:06,720 Speaker 2: just a survival instinct. This is just a stress response. 443 00:27:07,200 --> 00:27:09,960 Speaker 2: Your brain is doing its best to prepare you. But 444 00:27:10,040 --> 00:27:14,280 Speaker 2: it's best. It's also very imaginative and out there. You know, 445 00:27:14,359 --> 00:27:17,159 Speaker 2: you've got a really creative mind, That's what you know. 446 00:27:17,240 --> 00:27:19,680 Speaker 2: I've had a friend say to me once. She was like, yeah, 447 00:27:19,680 --> 00:27:23,760 Speaker 2: you're just very creative, and so take that creativity. You 448 00:27:23,760 --> 00:27:26,560 Speaker 2: can either use it to make up cook up like 449 00:27:26,600 --> 00:27:30,439 Speaker 2: the most crazy hypotheticals, or you can use it to 450 00:27:30,560 --> 00:27:34,640 Speaker 2: create something beautiful that's going to add to your life. 451 00:27:34,760 --> 00:27:38,359 Speaker 2: So as a refresh before we wrap up, here are 452 00:27:38,400 --> 00:27:42,199 Speaker 2: the four ways that you're going to try. Maybe you 453 00:27:42,240 --> 00:27:44,520 Speaker 2: can try one, you can try to You're going to 454 00:27:44,680 --> 00:27:48,240 Speaker 2: use these to make your anxiety work for you. Hopefully 455 00:27:48,520 --> 00:27:51,880 Speaker 2: you will go away and when you feel panic, worry, stress, 456 00:27:52,600 --> 00:27:55,520 Speaker 2: you will tell yourself that it's excitement. You will have 457 00:27:55,560 --> 00:27:58,119 Speaker 2: an ongoing list of the things that you do know 458 00:27:58,320 --> 00:28:01,400 Speaker 2: to engulf the things that you don't. No, you will 459 00:28:01,400 --> 00:28:04,360 Speaker 2: put a name to your anxiety. You'll visualize your worries, 460 00:28:04,480 --> 00:28:07,760 Speaker 2: you'll make a character out of it. And finally, when 461 00:28:07,960 --> 00:28:11,520 Speaker 2: your anxiety tells you to be small, tells you to 462 00:28:11,560 --> 00:28:18,040 Speaker 2: deconstruct your life instead, be creative, build something, make something, 463 00:28:18,160 --> 00:28:20,480 Speaker 2: even if it's like terrible, even if it's shit, even 464 00:28:20,480 --> 00:28:23,119 Speaker 2: if you don't think it's particularly pretty. You'll enjoy the 465 00:28:23,160 --> 00:28:26,720 Speaker 2: process and it will give the energy again somewhere to 466 00:28:26,760 --> 00:28:29,240 Speaker 2: go when you turn that creative energy that you have 467 00:28:29,920 --> 00:28:34,959 Speaker 2: away from the scary hypotheticals and into something beautiful and magnificent. 468 00:28:35,160 --> 00:28:38,240 Speaker 2: So I really do hope that if you're going through 469 00:28:38,240 --> 00:28:41,760 Speaker 2: an anxious period, I think that the biggest comfort for 470 00:28:41,840 --> 00:28:44,920 Speaker 2: me has been knowing that I am not alone and 471 00:28:45,080 --> 00:28:48,000 Speaker 2: you're definitely not alone either, because I can say, hand 472 00:28:48,000 --> 00:28:50,760 Speaker 2: on my chest that I am feeling it pretty intensely 473 00:28:50,800 --> 00:28:52,600 Speaker 2: at the moment. So we're in the same boat, I 474 00:28:52,680 --> 00:28:56,000 Speaker 2: promise you, and we'll get through it. We definitely will 475 00:28:56,000 --> 00:28:58,080 Speaker 2: get through it, because your body cannot be in this 476 00:28:58,200 --> 00:29:02,080 Speaker 2: state forever. It just can't. We know that biologically, we 477 00:29:02,160 --> 00:29:06,120 Speaker 2: know that just when we learn about the stress response, 478 00:29:06,160 --> 00:29:09,680 Speaker 2: then it's not possible. So please hold on, try some 479 00:29:09,720 --> 00:29:12,560 Speaker 2: of these tips. I promise it gets better. I promise 480 00:29:12,640 --> 00:29:16,120 Speaker 2: this is just your imagination working over time, which is 481 00:29:16,240 --> 00:29:21,520 Speaker 2: a beautiful thing sometimes but sometimes less than helpful. And yeah, 482 00:29:21,560 --> 00:29:23,880 Speaker 2: I hope that you find some peace in your day today. 483 00:29:23,880 --> 00:29:25,840 Speaker 2: I hope that this episode has brought you some peace. 484 00:29:26,440 --> 00:29:28,400 Speaker 2: If you did enjoy it, please make sure that you 485 00:29:28,440 --> 00:29:32,520 Speaker 2: are following along on Spotify or Apple podcasts. Leave a 486 00:29:32,560 --> 00:29:35,240 Speaker 2: five star review, especially if you're listening on Apple actually, 487 00:29:35,280 --> 00:29:38,040 Speaker 2: because we actually don't have many listeners over there, so 488 00:29:38,640 --> 00:29:42,320 Speaker 2: any reviews really do help. And of course I read 489 00:29:42,880 --> 00:29:45,080 Speaker 2: every single one of them so they don't go unnoticed. 490 00:29:45,720 --> 00:29:47,800 Speaker 2: And if you have an episode suggestion, if you have 491 00:29:47,800 --> 00:29:50,920 Speaker 2: a follow up to this episode, a question a query. 492 00:29:51,120 --> 00:29:54,840 Speaker 2: An additional tip that you think people might also benefit from, 493 00:29:55,120 --> 00:29:59,520 Speaker 2: please share it with me at that psychology podcast. Until 494 00:29:59,560 --> 00:30:03,280 Speaker 2: next time, stay safe, be kind, be gentle to yourself, 495 00:30:03,840 --> 00:30:04,840 Speaker 2: and we will talk soon.