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Speaker 1: All right, hey there everybody, Hey, me and TJ. Here,

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Speaker 1: we are into the new year. We hope your new

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Speaker 1: year and your resolutions are still on track. We are

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Speaker 1: well into now roads Dry January. So tell everybody how

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Speaker 1: you doing. All right?

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Speaker 2: Well, I have been waking up feeling refreshed and energetic

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Speaker 2: in a way that I haven't before, so that is awesome.

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Speaker 2: And I definitely feel the effects of the toxins leaving

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Speaker 2: my body.

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Speaker 1: But all positive.

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Speaker 2: Well, the only thing is I still feel a little

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Speaker 2: angry when I can't have a glass of wine at night,

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Speaker 2: like when I sit down on the couch and have

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Speaker 2: a movie going. It's just maybe it's just a pattern,

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Speaker 2: or it's just I don't know, if it's just the

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Speaker 2: experience of holding the glass.

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Speaker 1: It's it's been a little tough.

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Speaker 2: I'm still not there yet where this feels perfectly free

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Speaker 2: and fine.

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Speaker 1: Okay, but physically it feels amazing. Okay, Yeah, I love it.

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Speaker 1: This is a lot of people know that I've done

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Speaker 1: this for ten fifteen plus years and now always do

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Speaker 1: it Dry January. This is Rob's first time to fully

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Speaker 1: be on board with it, and on a matter of days,

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Speaker 1: you almost forget that you're not drinking, and it just

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Speaker 1: we drink so much water, you're so hydrated, and you

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Speaker 1: have some mocktails.

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Speaker 2: Is so I've been drinking club soda. I have a

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Speaker 2: little lemon or a line in it. And you actually

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Speaker 2: got me this idea. So we got some rosemary.

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Speaker 1: Yes it's a Cranberry spritzer that I learned from eight

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Speaker 1: years ago, but Cranberry's juice, sparkling water and a little rosemary.

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Speaker 2: I'm not doing the juice, but I've got the rosemary,

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Speaker 2: which actually was a nice little touch.

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Speaker 1: Maybe I'll try some mint. But I'm not there yet.

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Speaker 2: Where you forget that you're not drinking. I am not there.

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Speaker 1: Are you there? Yeah, it's not even that. I don't

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Speaker 1: even think about it being a part of the day anymore.

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Speaker 1: It's and I'm telling you, on January thirty one, you

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Speaker 1: will not be planning what you're going to drink on

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Speaker 1: February one.

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Speaker 2: You will not totally disagree with you this conversation. Last

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Speaker 2: night we were walking back and you said you're not

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Speaker 2: gonna want to have a drink on February one, and

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Speaker 2: I started laughing.

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Speaker 1: Tell me, yeah, all right, one hundred percent, I'm going

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Speaker 1: to want to drink up there. We're putting it out

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Speaker 1: there right now, and folks watch when you get there.

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Speaker 1: It's just not you're not going to plan something around it.

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Speaker 1: So we will get to that. I was actually already

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Speaker 1: talking about making reservations at this really cool bar. Nope,

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Speaker 1: not interested. Oh my gosh, Okay, we'll see. Well that's uh,

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Speaker 1: we're starting the we're starting the new year again. Hope

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Speaker 1: you're good with your resolutions. We also had a big

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Speaker 1: birthday since the since the new year came around, that

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Speaker 1: big birthday belonged to wrote a little one bean, my

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Speaker 1: little one. She turned eleven on January sixth. We had

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Speaker 1: a really good She wanted to go right, She didn't

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Speaker 1: want to party, didn't want friends around. I want a

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Speaker 1: big trip? Do want anything? What does she want to do? Shop?

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Speaker 1: Take me shopping? That means she's officially a tween? Is

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Speaker 1: that what that is? Yes?

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Speaker 2: So it's funny. My daughter turned twenty one eight days

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Speaker 2: before your daughter turned eleven. Right, so, and my daughter

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Speaker 2: wanted a party.

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Speaker 1: That's shocking, But that's twenty one. Oh that's different. But

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Speaker 1: that was a big It was a big thing for Sabine,

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Speaker 1: and you were a big part of the birthday, and

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Speaker 1: you have been in and look, everybody's familiar with our

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Speaker 1: story over the past year if you're listening here, But

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Speaker 1: it's when you have a new relationship where they are divorces,

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Speaker 1: they're kids involved, you're always trying to find the right

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Speaker 1: balance between your kids and your partner and bringing everybody together.

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Speaker 1: And you have said it to you privately, I'll say

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Speaker 1: it here publicly. You've been great and it's been one

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Speaker 1: of the great, great, great joys over the past several

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Speaker 1: months six months plus. Is how Sabine has really taken it.

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Speaker 1: She's known you since she was one, but known you

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Speaker 1: in a different capacity now. Has been really cool to

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Speaker 1: watch and see her elect too. And even sometimes when

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Speaker 1: I pick her from school, I say, yeah, no, Robot's

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Speaker 1: not at the house and then she's like, okay, then

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Speaker 1: I don't want to come because she's disappointed you're not

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Speaker 1: there's and again, it is very sweet and it has

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Speaker 1: been a really cool thing. It's been really cool to watch.

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Speaker 2: And as we've mentioned, our daughters have known each other.

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Speaker 2: My daughter's baby sat your daughter when she was little,

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Speaker 2: and I know they communicated on her birthday as well,

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Speaker 2: which was very sweet and it's just nice to see

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Speaker 2: everything becoming normal and getting easier and effortless, actually because

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Speaker 2: it was effort before and maybe that was just us

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Speaker 2: putting the effort on the situation. But it's been great.

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Speaker 2: And I love I mean, I love boys, and I

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Speaker 2: love all of that. But I'm a girl mom, I

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Speaker 2: always have been, so it comes very easily to me.

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Speaker 2: And yeah, you kind of let.

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Speaker 1: Girls lead the way.

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Speaker 2: You can't tell a girl who to like, who to

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Speaker 2: hang out with, what.

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Speaker 1: To think, what to do. That just doesn't end well.

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Speaker 2: So I at least have had that experience growing up

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Speaker 2: with my daughters, so it's served me well on navigating

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Speaker 2: all of this.

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Speaker 1: So that's been great. She was actually with us, she

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Speaker 1: was with us last night. Yeah, we're talking about movies,

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Speaker 1: watching a horror movie of course with her conjuring too.

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Speaker 1: It's so good. She loved it, right, she loved it.

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Speaker 1: But I think everybody knows at this point we are

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Speaker 1: big horror movie. We have not seen I cannot remember

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Speaker 1: the last movie we saw at a theater that was

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Speaker 1: not a horror movie, but now we have one. We

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Speaker 1: actually saw a movie in the theater a couple of

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Speaker 1: days ago that was not a horror movie.

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Speaker 2: Yes, and we took on some heavy themes, but with

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Speaker 2: some levity, right, some social satire.

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Speaker 1: American it was American fiction. I was told to watch

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Speaker 1: this by one of my boys. His his message. A

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Speaker 1: brother came to me and sent a message, Happy New Year,

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Speaker 1: and see American fiction is what he told us to do.

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Speaker 1: He followed up by saying, see it with a theater

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Speaker 1: full of white people. It makes it better. He was

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Speaker 1: not kidding. I get it now, I didn't know it.

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Speaker 1: So we went to the Angelica Film Festival. Film House

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Speaker 1: is what it's called.

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Speaker 2: I believe it's in Soho and sure enough it was

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Speaker 2: about eighty five percent white.

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Speaker 1: Would you say, maybe even higher, maybe ninety percent white

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Speaker 1: for sure. But if you don't know what the movie

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Speaker 1: is about, it essentially takes on these themes that we

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Speaker 1: have in our society, a lot of racial themes. But

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Speaker 1: this idea that so often in media or and business,

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Speaker 1: that black voices and black stories aren't told unless they

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Speaker 1: are greenlit by a white person executive. Those stories have

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Speaker 1: to fit into what that white person thinks the black

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Speaker 1: experience is. So oftentimes it's not an accurate depiction. It's

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Speaker 1: some stereotypical depiction of what black life is supposed to be.

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Speaker 2: And there were some subtle nots to that, and some

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Speaker 2: overt ones and some very funny ones throughout and what

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Speaker 2: was notable, And you and I both realized at one

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Speaker 2: point that some very funny scenes we were the only

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Speaker 2: people laughing.

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Speaker 1: Because truly, if I weren't sitting.

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Speaker 2: Next to you, and you weren't my boyfriend, I might

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Speaker 2: have been afraid to laugh at them too, And I

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Speaker 2: think that's what was happening. The white folks in the

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Speaker 2: theater were like, can I laugh at that? Because it

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Speaker 2: was so outrageous but true at the same time. And

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Speaker 2: it was uncomfortable, which is what the whole point was.

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Speaker 1: But it's specifically what, yes, what the movie is meant

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Speaker 1: to be and to do. And there were times, I

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Speaker 1: don't say uncomfortable, but I always felt like I was

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Speaker 1: being rude because I was falling onto my chair laughing

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Speaker 1: at some of the jokes in that movie. And it's

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Speaker 1: dead silence in the theater.

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Speaker 2: And your laughter gave me pervision to laugh because clearly

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Speaker 2: it was funny, and so I decided to laugh with you.

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Speaker 2: And there were I would say multiple times, were were

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Speaker 2: the only two people laughing at very funny scenes in

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Speaker 2: the theater.

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Speaker 1: This was for a lot of and for black folks

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Speaker 1: who cheer this movie and it's funny and it's again,

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Speaker 1: it's brilliant. It will be in the Oscars race, for sure.

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Speaker 1: Jeffrey Wright is amazing as well in the lead. He's

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Speaker 1: a wonderful actor that you all know. But for me,

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Speaker 1: so many things I saw in the movie are things

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Speaker 1: that I dealt with, certainly in newsrooms across the country

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Speaker 1: over the past all of my career. But the one

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Speaker 1: in particular has to do with, right, this is what

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Speaker 1: I think of black people, and if you don't tell

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Speaker 1: the story from that angle, then I'm not going to

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Speaker 1: get your story on. And I've had that issue in

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Speaker 1: newsrooms plenty of time, talk to you about this plenty.

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Speaker 1: But being in a morning meeting where there's forty people

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Speaker 1: in the meeting, thirty eight of them are white, I'm

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Speaker 1: the one black male, And for so many times the

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Speaker 1: story gets pitched and we hear the person pitching the

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Speaker 1: story about a black person will put a caveat this

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Speaker 1: person out of da no, no, no no. But it's okay.

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Speaker 1: We can interview. They are so well spoken, they really

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Speaker 1: they speak so well. So what they were doing in

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Speaker 1: all those times, all those meetings was explaining to every

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Speaker 1: all the white people that it's okay to put this

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Speaker 1: black person on because I know what you're thinking. When

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Speaker 1: I say black person, you think they are this. They

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Speaker 1: talk like this, they look like this, say no, no, no, no,

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Speaker 1: this white. I heard that so many times. And this

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Speaker 1: movie brings up those themes and they do it in

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Speaker 1: a comedic way that it should spark a better conversation.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it validates your experience and it hopefully educates people

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Speaker 2: who couldn't possibly have had that experience.

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Speaker 1: So please go again. We highly endorse that movie American fiction.

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Speaker 1: We rarely endorse something that's not a horror movie, but

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Speaker 1: this one's great. Yeah, there've been a couple of them too.

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Speaker 2: We watched You People Streaming and The Blackening also those

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Speaker 2: All three of those movies take on similar themes in

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Speaker 2: different ways of storytelling. That is very entertaining, and I

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Speaker 2: really do think you learn something from it when you're

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Speaker 2: watching it as a white person.

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Speaker 1: Yes, and you learn that. We can never admit that

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Speaker 1: we ever watch Friends, which I haven't, by the way,

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Speaker 1: and of course I have, but we talk about drive

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Speaker 1: Junior here at the top. But we're into this new year,

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Speaker 1: and something that's on a lot of people's minds right now,

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Speaker 1: of course is relationships. Either you are starting anew and

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Speaker 1: you want to maybe get out of one, or you're

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Speaker 1: looking to get into one. But the beginning of the

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Speaker 1: year has two days in particular, they got something for everybody.

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Speaker 1: I was gonna say, both could be true. Yeah what

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Speaker 1: you just said, so, yes, we found this out.

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Speaker 2: I didn't know this beforehand, but there's a thing called

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Speaker 2: divorce Day in this country, and lawyers have now kind

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Speaker 2: of said, hey, this is the day. It's the Monday

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Speaker 2: after January one each year where they say this is

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Speaker 2: the biggest day for couples to file for divorce or

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Speaker 2: contact a divorce lawyer to say, hey, I want to

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Speaker 2: end this relationship. And January, I think has also been

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Speaker 2: just divorce month because people finally say, okay, we made

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Speaker 2: it through the holidays and I'm very now certain I

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Speaker 2: don't want to be with this person for the rest

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Speaker 2: of the year. And coincidentally, it was yesterday, actually Monday,

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Speaker 2: January seventh of this year, or actually it was Sunday, Sunday,

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Speaker 2: the second sorry Sunday to seventh is called Dating Sunday

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Speaker 2: or Dating Day, and that is an actual day that

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Speaker 2: has been recorded that apps dating apps across the board

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Speaker 2: around the world see the biggest increase in volume and

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Speaker 2: likes and response times all of that because people on

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Speaker 2: that Sunday after New Year say hey, I want to

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Speaker 2: be in or at least find some sort of relationship.

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Speaker 1: So chances are if you're hearing our voice, you are

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Speaker 1: in one of those categories that maybe trying to get

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Speaker 1: out of a relationship with sounds like a down or a

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Speaker 1: bad thing, but it can be a very positive thing

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Speaker 1: for a lot of people but looking for something new.

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Speaker 1: So we were curious about divorce Day and in particular

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Speaker 1: dating Day as we turn the page on another year.

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Speaker 1: So Michael k the global head of communications for Okay

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Speaker 1: cup it is in studio here with us and let

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Speaker 1: me start with that. How big of an uptick are

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Speaker 1: we talking about? You all see in dating apps? See

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Speaker 1: Michael on Dating Sunday.

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Speaker 3: So, first of all, thank you for having me. It's

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Speaker 3: an honor to be here as a listener and as

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Speaker 3: a fan.

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Speaker 1: Thank you, Thank.

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Speaker 3: You honor to be here. Dating Sunday is pretty much

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Speaker 3: the super Bowl for all dating apps, that's all the

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Speaker 3: sports terminology you're going to be able to get out of.

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Speaker 3: But every single first Sunday of the year we see

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Speaker 3: double digit growth in terms of matches and likes and messages,

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Speaker 3: and it sometimes it could hover between ten to twenty percent,

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Speaker 3: and sometimes people think that feels so low, but you

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Speaker 3: have to remember there are millions and millions of people

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Speaker 3: on these dating apps, So this is happening really across

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Speaker 3: the board. If you are into online dating or if

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Speaker 3: you're trying it for the first time, dating Sunday and onward,

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Speaker 3: especially in the first month or so of the year,

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Speaker 3: is the time for you to be on OkCupid, hinge Hinder,

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Speaker 3: whatever your app of choice really is.

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Speaker 2: And with okay Cupid, a large part of going onto

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Speaker 2: this app is to be matched, and there's science behind it.

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Speaker 1: Correct.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, So for anyone who's unfamiliar, Okacubid was actually founded

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Speaker 3: by four math majors at Heartard and it comes as

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Speaker 3: no surprise for anyone who's been on it. We are

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Speaker 3: extremely data driven. Our algorithm is really complex, but we

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Speaker 3: at our core match people on what matters to them

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Speaker 3: through in app questions. It's really as simple as that

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Speaker 3: We use our questions to serve as conversation starters. They

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Speaker 3: also allow you to figure out what's important to you

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Speaker 3: and really helps you define who you are, what you're

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Speaker 3: looking for, and makes you think about what you're looking

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Speaker 3: for in a partner as well. So there's everything related

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Speaker 3: to dating, relationships, and sex, but also really anything that's

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Speaker 3: top of mind for our gen Z millennial gen X daters.

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Speaker 3: We have questions about black lives matter, and education reform

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Speaker 3: and gun reform, and basically if you're talking about a

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Speaker 3: topic with your friend, your family members, or your coworkers,

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Speaker 3: we also want to ask about it on our platform

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Speaker 3: because we are an app that foster's connection and conversation.

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Speaker 1: Well, ok, ellen that point. So many folks will go

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Speaker 1: into you meet somebody, You go into a bar, there's

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Speaker 1: a friend, there's a We're used to meeting people in

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Speaker 1: that organic way. Of course, apps have changed that. Is

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Speaker 1: this a better system? You all have found in that

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Speaker 1: when they do take the questionnaires, people have a better

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Speaker 1: chance when they do answer these questions, when they do

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Speaker 1: get their match percentage. Maybe you can figure that out

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Speaker 1: if you met somebody at the bar, but it might

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Speaker 1: take you longer. What are the results you all have

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Speaker 1: seen over the years in terms of matching people.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I think it's a better system, but it's also

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Speaker 3: a more convenient system. You know, when you look at

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Speaker 3: people daters today, they're dating very different than our parents.

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Speaker 3: My parents went on a first date, they were a

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Speaker 3: blind first date. They're together over sixty years. And for

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Speaker 3: their generation, people were meeting in these gathering places. They

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Speaker 3: were meeting at temple, they were meeting at church, they

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Speaker 3: were meeting through family. But that's not how people are

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Speaker 3: connecting today anymore. So it makes dating apps make it

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Speaker 3: a lot more convenient for the person who's extremely busy

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Speaker 3: and can't take time out of their days, nights, and

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Speaker 3: weekends to go on fifty first dates, and it allows

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Speaker 3: them to kind of comb through that list and really

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Speaker 3: easily on a dating app, find people that they're really

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Speaker 3: compatible with, that they have views that aligned with them,

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Speaker 3: and really narrowed that list down and say, I know

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Speaker 3: you're someone that there may be a connection with because

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Speaker 3: we agree on XYZ.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and I did say this.

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Speaker 2: I believe last week that one of the things I

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Speaker 2: learned in twenty twenty three was that, yes, chemistry is important,

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Speaker 2: but compatibility. I feel like is the most important part

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Speaker 2: of a relationship. And so to that point, TJ and I,

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Speaker 2: I mean, we know we have chemistry and I think

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Speaker 2: we're compatible. We are, Okay, I do, I think so too,

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Speaker 2: But does the science back that up?

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Speaker 1: We don't need it too, baby, So we're gonna find out.

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Speaker 2: So we actually asked Michael to give us some of

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Speaker 2: the questions that they ask anyone who goes onto their

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Speaker 2: apps to fill out and then they're then matched with someone.

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Speaker 1: So we did the questions this weekend. Over the weekend,

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Speaker 1: we don't know what each other answered, and Michael has

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Speaker 1: the results of what our questionnaire.

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Speaker 2: Shows whether or not we're a match or not. There's

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Speaker 2: a percentage right, yes, yes, okay.

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Speaker 3: As a match percentage on every user.

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Speaker 2: Scenes Okay, I'm definitely a little nervous, But when we

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Speaker 2: come back, we're going to get the results and talk

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Speaker 2: about what it all means.

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Speaker 1: All right, We're back here with a moment of truth, folks.

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Speaker 1: We got Michael k the global head of communications for

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Speaker 1: our kay cup It here in studio with us. We've

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Speaker 1: been talking about nash Well, divorce Day and Dating app Day,

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Speaker 1: and everybody has relationships on their mind. Around to possibly

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Speaker 1: get out of one or get into a new one.

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Speaker 1: And dating apps are a big part of that. And okay,

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Speaker 1: cupe it is one that gives you a questionnaire, you

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Speaker 1: fill it out, other people fill it out, and then okay,

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Speaker 1: keep it two you whether or not you are a match.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: I wonder how many already established couples like ourselves go

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Speaker 1: on to then take this quiz and find out after

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Speaker 1: the fact we're doing it backward they're actually comfatible or

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Speaker 1: what their match percentage is. Okay, So Michael helped us

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Speaker 1: out with this, so they sent us a list of questions.

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Speaker 1: Robot and I filled them out over the weekend. We

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Speaker 1: didn't see the other's answers, so we have no idea.

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Speaker 1: But it's about to be revealed, all right, Michael. He's

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Speaker 1: gonna tell us if we had done this as two

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Speaker 1: singles on the app, would we have been matched, or

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Speaker 1: what our match percentage is? So let's start there. What

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Speaker 1: is our match percentI is, Michael, So I'm gonna.

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Speaker 3: Unvolve that later. We're really gonna make you wait for this,

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Speaker 3: but I will say, Okay, we're definitely doing it backwards.

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Speaker 3: But I've done this a lot with people who are

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Speaker 3: already dating, engaged, married, Okay, and I have to say,

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Speaker 3: y'all agreed on a lot, okay, overwhelmingly. Okay, so we're

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Speaker 3: starting off on a strong place. Okay, so let's kick

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Speaker 3: it off there. You're both and no one yell at me.

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Speaker 3: They call themselves this. You're both extroverts, you're both intense people.

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Speaker 3: You're mourning people. You enjoy relaxing at home. You're closer

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Speaker 3: with your family, you're open to cooking together. But I

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Speaker 3: don't want anyone to get bored. We definitely asked saucy

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Speaker 3: questions too, and you're all really aligned there as well.

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Speaker 1: So you so we're boring, is what you're saying.

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Speaker 3: Not for much longer. You both enjoy sex more than

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Speaker 3: for play. You're both super into post workout sex and

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Speaker 3: shower sex, and people they prefer cuffs over ropes. So

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Speaker 3: there was literally no question off limits in this test,

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Speaker 3: which made it so.

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Speaker 1: Much more fun.

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Speaker 3: I feel like I've known you guys for years as well,

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Speaker 3: so there was a lot in the bedroom out of

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Speaker 3: the bedroom that you aligned on, solid, solid star.

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Speaker 1: I now know us better than my parents do.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, don't listen to this one. You're going to edit

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Speaker 3: that out, So is there anything there that shocked you?

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Speaker 1: No? No, Actually, the thing is we know each other.

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Speaker 2: Really really, we've been friends now for nine years, and

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Speaker 2: so when we it's an interesting thing when you're when

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Speaker 2: you don't have romantic designs on someone, you're more willing

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Speaker 2: to be telling all and vulnerable. And I let him

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Speaker 2: see Mike works. He let me see his in a

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Speaker 2: way that I don't think you would do if you

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Speaker 2: just started out dating. So we actually know, maybe even

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Speaker 2: too much about it.

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Speaker 1: Do you have things in there that we didn't agree

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Speaker 1: on as well?

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Speaker 3: Yes, so let's talk about where you disagree it. And

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Speaker 3: there were questions like, keep in mind sometimes there's multiple options,

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Speaker 3: four options, so some questions you technically disagreed, but it's

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Speaker 3: barely a disagreement. So there are a couple of things

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Speaker 3: where you answer differently. We also asked what you value

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Speaker 3: most in a partner. You disagreed on this, but I

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Speaker 3: loved your responses. So Amy said, communication, TJ. You said trust.

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Speaker 3: What neither of you said was physical attraction and romance,

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Speaker 3: And while both of those are absolutely important, it really

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Speaker 3: showed me that you both were looking for that deep,

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Speaker 3: meaningful relationship with a really strong foundation. So I didn't

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Speaker 3: even want to consider that a disagreement.

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Speaker 2: And I actually was going back and forth between trust

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Speaker 2: and communication. I didn't know how to put one above

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Speaker 2: the other.

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Speaker 3: Yeah it's a hard one. Yeah, it's a hard one.

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Speaker 3: You also disagreed on discussing politics. Oh, yeah, that was

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Speaker 3: something you were not aligned on. You know, my parents

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Speaker 3: never talked about politics at the at the dinner table.

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Speaker 3: So it's a very different time. But almost twenty million

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Speaker 3: people on our app right now said they enjoy discussing politics,

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Speaker 3: and eight and ten people actually want to talk politics

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Speaker 3: with a romantic partner.

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Speaker 1: Was the breakdown? I said no? When she said yes,

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Speaker 1: is that what I said?

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Speaker 2: No? I said yes, Well, because you know what I've

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Speaker 2: always said this, maybe now a little bit less, but

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Speaker 2: when you are in the news business and you're talking

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Speaker 2: about politics at work, the last thing I want to

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Speaker 2: do when I'm not on the job or on the

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Speaker 2: clock is talk about politics. And not everybody is the same,

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Speaker 2: but it's just one of those things where I like

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Speaker 2: to do and talk about other things than things I

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Speaker 2: can't change that are beyond frustrating to me at a

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Speaker 2: certain point.

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Speaker 1: Maybe that's just being in the business for as long

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Speaker 1: as I have. But yeah, I don't like to take

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Speaker 1: my work home.

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Speaker 3: See that makes sense to me because on the weekends

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Speaker 3: I'll have all my friends say, can you help me

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Speaker 3: with my hinge profile or my okay, keep it profile.

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Speaker 3: I'm like, oh, really tell me Monday through Friday eight

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Speaker 3: right eight am to five pm.

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Speaker 1: Exactly. It's my poor brother who's a doctor. He can't

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Speaker 1: go into a party without someone, you know, lifting up

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Speaker 1: their sleeve and showing him a rash and asking him

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Speaker 1: what it is. So I that's just where I stand.

436
00:21:57,280 --> 00:21:59,960
Speaker 1: You liked. We haven't talked about politics much. I think

437
00:22:00,240 --> 00:22:02,359
Speaker 1: we do, but we don't talk about it in the

438
00:22:02,359 --> 00:22:05,920
Speaker 1: way that oftentimes I think so many families do around

439
00:22:05,960 --> 00:22:08,639
Speaker 1: the dinner table. You're voted for that person, I voted

440
00:22:08,640 --> 00:22:12,119
Speaker 1: for this person. We are issue based conversations that we

441
00:22:12,240 --> 00:22:14,959
Speaker 1: have a lot of times. But no, I wouldn't dare like,

442
00:22:15,080 --> 00:22:16,880
Speaker 1: oh who'd you vote for? You vote for him? Oh

443
00:22:16,920 --> 00:22:19,679
Speaker 1: I would you do this promp, let's talk about Biden.

444
00:22:20,240 --> 00:22:20,560
Speaker 2: Thank you.

445
00:22:21,040 --> 00:22:22,680
Speaker 1: We don't do that at all at all.

446
00:22:23,200 --> 00:22:26,439
Speaker 3: Another place where you guys disagreed, and I wonder what

447
00:22:26,480 --> 00:22:29,480
Speaker 3: you each think the other person said was is jealousy

448
00:22:29,680 --> 00:22:30,280
Speaker 3: healthy in a.

449
00:22:30,200 --> 00:22:35,239
Speaker 1: Relationship, So I said yes, I said hell no. So

450
00:22:35,440 --> 00:22:36,920
Speaker 1: I wouldn't like to.

451
00:22:36,840 --> 00:22:40,879
Speaker 2: Act on that jealousy or be petty or small. But

452
00:22:41,040 --> 00:22:46,560
Speaker 2: feeling that bit of jealousy makes me know that I

453
00:22:46,600 --> 00:22:48,520
Speaker 2: want to be with him and only him, and I

454
00:22:48,560 --> 00:22:49,960
Speaker 2: want him to be with me and only me, And

455
00:22:50,000 --> 00:22:52,000
Speaker 2: it just I don't know, it just I don't like

456
00:22:52,080 --> 00:22:54,280
Speaker 2: the feeling, and I don't want to act on it,

457
00:22:54,440 --> 00:22:56,760
Speaker 2: but knowing it's there actually in a weird way, makes

458
00:22:56,760 --> 00:22:58,320
Speaker 2: me feel good.

459
00:22:58,560 --> 00:23:00,720
Speaker 1: Two things, How do you act on jealousy?

460
00:23:00,760 --> 00:23:03,040
Speaker 2: How would you ask by accusing somebody or saying don't

461
00:23:03,040 --> 00:23:03,760
Speaker 2: talk to that person?

462
00:23:03,840 --> 00:23:05,480
Speaker 1: Or how dare you do this? Like? I don't think

463
00:23:05,480 --> 00:23:07,520
Speaker 1: that that's correct or right or healthy at all in

464
00:23:07,560 --> 00:23:11,120
Speaker 1: a relationship? Part too, Okay. The second thing goes back

465
00:23:11,160 --> 00:23:14,520
Speaker 1: to the question when the answer was trust. I don't

466
00:23:14,560 --> 00:23:17,280
Speaker 1: worry about it, think about it at all. It's a

467
00:23:17,280 --> 00:23:19,000
Speaker 1: trust matter with me. I don't need to get you

468
00:23:19,040 --> 00:23:20,720
Speaker 1: if you want to go do whatever you want to do.

469
00:23:20,760 --> 00:23:23,240
Speaker 1: If I see you out that window right there, talking

470
00:23:23,280 --> 00:23:26,360
Speaker 1: all flirty or whatever with anybody and like yourself out,

471
00:23:26,640 --> 00:23:28,959
Speaker 1: that's my woman. She's going on with me. Whatever I

472
00:23:29,040 --> 00:23:32,359
Speaker 1: see there whatever I trust that I have to, but

473
00:23:33,200 --> 00:23:33,560
Speaker 1: not to.

474
00:23:33,840 --> 00:23:35,719
Speaker 3: Speak for you. But I feel like you and I

475
00:23:35,760 --> 00:23:38,440
Speaker 3: Amy are really aligned on this question. I don't think

476
00:23:38,720 --> 00:23:41,040
Speaker 3: it's about trust for either of us. I think she

477
00:23:41,359 --> 00:23:42,600
Speaker 3: wholeheartedly trusts you.

478
00:23:42,680 --> 00:23:42,879
Speaker 1: I do.

479
00:23:43,080 --> 00:23:46,639
Speaker 3: But if I see my boyfriend and there's another guy

480
00:23:46,720 --> 00:23:49,440
Speaker 3: at the bar talking to him, I see red. That

481
00:23:49,480 --> 00:23:52,680
Speaker 3: does not mean they should not be talking. It does

482
00:23:52,720 --> 00:23:55,000
Speaker 3: not mean I think my boyfriend is going to cross

483
00:23:55,119 --> 00:23:55,760
Speaker 3: any line.

484
00:23:55,920 --> 00:23:57,880
Speaker 1: Yep. But there is that little piece.

485
00:23:57,640 --> 00:24:03,240
Speaker 2: Of jealous I always I don't think I'm a jealous

486
00:24:03,240 --> 00:24:05,679
Speaker 2: person generally, but when you feel that little bit of twine,

487
00:24:05,720 --> 00:24:08,960
Speaker 2: it's like, ooh, like it just reminds you how you

488
00:24:09,000 --> 00:24:09,919
Speaker 2: feel about that person.

489
00:24:09,960 --> 00:24:11,840
Speaker 1: I'm gonna I agree. I'm going to take your jealousy

490
00:24:11,840 --> 00:24:17,080
Speaker 1: out for a spin. If you're really going to stand

491
00:24:17,119 --> 00:24:19,680
Speaker 1: by that statement, Well, no, maybe it is a little

492
00:24:19,760 --> 00:24:22,600
Speaker 1: level of confidence or arrogance or even on my part

493
00:24:22,640 --> 00:24:25,920
Speaker 1: to where I look and I just it doesn't register

494
00:24:26,040 --> 00:24:28,600
Speaker 1: to me, and I guess I'm just not jealous in

495
00:24:28,640 --> 00:24:28,920
Speaker 1: that way.

496
00:24:29,040 --> 00:24:30,879
Speaker 2: Well, I hope that I would never act on it,

497
00:24:31,000 --> 00:24:32,840
Speaker 2: or that you would never see or feel or hear

498
00:24:32,880 --> 00:24:33,520
Speaker 2: anything from me.

499
00:24:33,720 --> 00:24:36,520
Speaker 1: Oh my god, You're always you're always flirty and doing

500
00:24:36,560 --> 00:24:38,840
Speaker 1: stuff and over there inside of the day which fall.

501
00:24:39,480 --> 00:24:42,880
Speaker 1: I don't know where you're stop, but there is trust there.

502
00:24:43,320 --> 00:24:46,080
Speaker 2: It doesn't mean you still can't feel that little good.

503
00:24:46,680 --> 00:24:50,520
Speaker 3: Well, I wish you could, so we require an okay,

504
00:24:50,560 --> 00:24:53,480
Speaker 3: keep it to people. Answer fifteen of these questions. Y'all

505
00:24:53,520 --> 00:24:56,280
Speaker 3: went on to answer much much more. You answer dozens

506
00:24:56,320 --> 00:24:59,240
Speaker 3: of them, and after looking at both, your response is

507
00:24:59,720 --> 00:25:03,760
Speaker 3: lie it up. Factoring in that you would also most

508
00:25:03,840 --> 00:25:06,040
Speaker 3: likely be looking for the same things in terms of

509
00:25:06,520 --> 00:25:09,879
Speaker 3: age and a partner and location and all that, we

510
00:25:10,119 --> 00:25:14,040
Speaker 3: scored you an eighty four percent. Oh wow, which is

511
00:25:14,400 --> 00:25:18,080
Speaker 3: really high. Everyone tries to aim for that one hundred percent.

512
00:25:18,400 --> 00:25:20,800
Speaker 3: I have never once I've been working with here five years.

513
00:25:20,960 --> 00:25:24,320
Speaker 3: I met thousands of couples. I've never met at a

514
00:25:24,359 --> 00:25:26,920
Speaker 3: couple that matched one hundred percent. And also, I don't

515
00:25:26,920 --> 00:25:28,600
Speaker 3: know if I would ever want that in a part.

516
00:25:28,640 --> 00:25:32,080
Speaker 3: You need a little bit of disagreement and misalignment, you know,

517
00:25:32,080 --> 00:25:34,040
Speaker 3: I think that keeps it fun and exciting. But where

518
00:25:34,080 --> 00:25:38,640
Speaker 3: you both aligned on was the really important core factors

519
00:25:38,640 --> 00:25:41,000
Speaker 3: in a relationship. It was clear from the beginning you

520
00:25:41,000 --> 00:25:44,239
Speaker 3: were aligned on family matters. You were aligned on what

521
00:25:44,280 --> 00:25:48,160
Speaker 3: you're looking for in a relationship. That's really what's most important.

522
00:25:48,200 --> 00:25:49,959
Speaker 3: And you're aligned on horror movies.

523
00:25:50,000 --> 00:25:52,720
Speaker 2: And yeah, I did see some of the questions we

524
00:25:52,800 --> 00:26:00,000
Speaker 2: didn't get. I saw how important is religion to you?

525
00:26:00,200 --> 00:26:01,560
Speaker 2: I can't read my own writing because I don't have

526
00:26:01,600 --> 00:26:05,000
Speaker 2: my glasses on. Do you like scary movies? Could you

527
00:26:05,040 --> 00:26:07,800
Speaker 2: ever date someone really messy? We would agree on all

528
00:26:07,840 --> 00:26:09,680
Speaker 2: of those things, but I was just thinking about how

529
00:26:09,720 --> 00:26:12,480
Speaker 2: deep some of these questions do go. Yeah, why would

530
00:26:12,520 --> 00:26:14,520
Speaker 2: you want to answer more just to get a clearer

531
00:26:14,560 --> 00:26:16,119
Speaker 2: picture of who you might be dating?

532
00:26:16,720 --> 00:26:16,920
Speaker 1: Yeah?

533
00:26:17,000 --> 00:26:20,320
Speaker 3: Absolutely, Again, we see a lot of people actually go

534
00:26:20,440 --> 00:26:22,840
Speaker 3: on to answer more and more, and it's because the

535
00:26:22,880 --> 00:26:25,040
Speaker 3: more you answer, the more compatible your matches are going

536
00:26:25,119 --> 00:26:27,440
Speaker 3: to be. But I also think the way the questions

537
00:26:27,440 --> 00:26:31,919
Speaker 3: are written, it really challenges you as a person to say, oh,

538
00:26:32,400 --> 00:26:34,439
Speaker 3: I didn't think that would be important to me, but

539
00:26:34,520 --> 00:26:37,480
Speaker 3: it actually is. Or this used to be at the

540
00:26:37,480 --> 00:26:40,120
Speaker 3: top of my list, and now I don't know if

541
00:26:40,119 --> 00:26:42,960
Speaker 3: I even care about it anymore. Especially during the pandemic,

542
00:26:43,000 --> 00:26:45,200
Speaker 3: we saw a lot of people change what was important

543
00:26:45,240 --> 00:26:48,080
Speaker 3: to them because you can actually rank your questions. I do, okay,

544
00:26:48,119 --> 00:26:50,400
Speaker 3: keep it how important it is to you, that's cool.

545
00:26:50,440 --> 00:26:53,920
Speaker 3: When I first started in twenty nineteen, people all they

546
00:26:54,000 --> 00:26:56,600
Speaker 3: were answering questions about were holding hands on a date

547
00:26:56,800 --> 00:26:59,200
Speaker 3: and coffee for a first date, or if they want

548
00:26:59,200 --> 00:27:02,320
Speaker 3: to go to dinner or drinks. That has completely changed.

549
00:27:02,359 --> 00:27:06,520
Speaker 3: The most answered questions and the questions ranked most important

550
00:27:06,600 --> 00:27:11,080
Speaker 3: are do you support marriage equality? Do you support reproductive healthcare?

551
00:27:11,160 --> 00:27:13,120
Speaker 3: Do you think women have the right to choose what

552
00:27:13,160 --> 00:27:15,159
Speaker 3: they want to do with their own bodies? Do you

553
00:27:15,200 --> 00:27:18,960
Speaker 3: prioritize mental health? Are you open to therapy? People really

554
00:27:19,080 --> 00:27:22,800
Speaker 3: changed over the past few years what's most most important

555
00:27:22,840 --> 00:27:25,240
Speaker 3: to them? And I think our questions really help them

556
00:27:25,760 --> 00:27:29,080
Speaker 3: uncover their must haves and they're nice to haves.

557
00:27:29,400 --> 00:27:32,840
Speaker 1: What would you can you overcome? You said must haves

558
00:27:32,880 --> 00:27:35,600
Speaker 1: and nice to have? But this idea of compatibility, what

559
00:27:35,640 --> 00:27:37,280
Speaker 1: did you say? A second no, you said compatibility and

560
00:27:37,320 --> 00:27:39,159
Speaker 1: something that was another way chemistry? Chemistry.

561
00:27:39,200 --> 00:27:41,280
Speaker 2: Chemistry is fleeting, you know, I mean it can it

562
00:27:41,280 --> 00:27:42,160
Speaker 2: could just be attraction.

563
00:27:42,840 --> 00:27:45,040
Speaker 1: But on those two things, when it as far as

564
00:27:45,080 --> 00:27:49,560
Speaker 1: you Ole's research and the questions go compatibility, we sometimes

565
00:27:49,560 --> 00:27:52,480
Speaker 1: it seems surface right. We like horror movies, that makes

566
00:27:52,520 --> 00:27:54,680
Speaker 1: us compatible. We like to cook it makes us compatible.

567
00:27:54,680 --> 00:27:58,159
Speaker 1: We enjoy a nice rose that makes us compatible. But

568
00:27:58,200 --> 00:28:01,520
Speaker 1: then when people see themselves not come patible in those ways,

569
00:28:02,400 --> 00:28:05,600
Speaker 1: they think, Okay, then that's a rap and I'm done.

570
00:28:06,119 --> 00:28:09,560
Speaker 1: But when they do have those things and they're so

571
00:28:09,720 --> 00:28:13,080
Speaker 1: compatible and have good chemistry, sometimes they forget about the

572
00:28:13,080 --> 00:28:17,920
Speaker 1: core those core questions. Can you overcome I'm always fascinated

573
00:28:17,920 --> 00:28:24,760
Speaker 1: by this. Can you overcome a lack of compatibility with

574
00:28:24,840 --> 00:28:28,000
Speaker 1: someone from your reason? Can you overcome that if you

575
00:28:28,119 --> 00:28:32,239
Speaker 1: do have the core value? Or is compatibility something that

576
00:28:32,480 --> 00:28:36,199
Speaker 1: always always needs to be there on things that seem small?

577
00:28:37,440 --> 00:28:40,479
Speaker 3: I think you need to break down what you're talking

578
00:28:40,520 --> 00:28:44,680
Speaker 3: about in terms of comibi compatibility and what you're compatible on.

579
00:28:45,760 --> 00:28:50,440
Speaker 3: I don't care if my partner loves Harry Potter or

580
00:28:50,560 --> 00:28:54,320
Speaker 3: Taylor Swift or The Real Housewives as much as I do.

581
00:28:54,720 --> 00:28:57,960
Speaker 3: They need to stand my favorite ogs, but they don't

582
00:28:57,960 --> 00:28:59,480
Speaker 3: have to watch the shows as much as I do.

583
00:29:00,160 --> 00:29:04,120
Speaker 3: What I refuse to compromise on when it comes to

584
00:29:04,160 --> 00:29:10,760
Speaker 3: compatibility is how you feel about LGBTQ plus rights, black

585
00:29:10,760 --> 00:29:14,920
Speaker 3: Lives Matter, stop Asian hate, really, all these kind of

586
00:29:15,160 --> 00:29:18,360
Speaker 3: heavier things that we've been going through over the past

587
00:29:18,360 --> 00:29:20,280
Speaker 3: few years. And I think that's what Okay, keep it

588
00:29:20,360 --> 00:29:23,000
Speaker 3: does for you. But really, any every dating app does

589
00:29:23,080 --> 00:29:25,600
Speaker 3: this in some kind of way. It helps you figure

590
00:29:25,640 --> 00:29:30,440
Speaker 3: out as long as you're aligned on those deeper issues.

591
00:29:30,800 --> 00:29:33,080
Speaker 3: We see a lot of issues based dating. Right now,

592
00:29:33,600 --> 00:29:35,840
Speaker 3: then I think you can move on and figure out

593
00:29:36,080 --> 00:29:39,280
Speaker 3: how important the other things are and if compatibility there

594
00:29:39,520 --> 00:29:41,680
Speaker 3: really matters to you. My boyfriends never drink coffee. I

595
00:29:41,760 --> 00:29:46,000
Speaker 3: drink coffee daily. We're not compatible when you think of that,

596
00:29:46,000 --> 00:29:46,920
Speaker 3: that's okay.

597
00:29:47,040 --> 00:29:50,400
Speaker 1: Right, Yeah, you don't like coffee. I do. We've survived

598
00:29:51,560 --> 00:29:54,200
Speaker 1: you like I just heard of it about three months ago.

599
00:29:54,280 --> 00:29:57,040
Speaker 1: That's true. Those are the things that make it interesting, right.

600
00:29:57,480 --> 00:30:01,640
Speaker 1: I heard a little while ago that there's this phrase

601
00:30:01,640 --> 00:30:04,120
Speaker 1: that a lot of folks use, even in the online

602
00:30:04,160 --> 00:30:04,600
Speaker 1: dating world.

603
00:30:04,680 --> 00:30:08,960
Speaker 2: Opposites attract and then they attack. Have you all found

604
00:30:08,960 --> 00:30:10,360
Speaker 2: that to be the case.

605
00:30:11,400 --> 00:30:11,960
Speaker 1: Yes and no.

606
00:30:12,520 --> 00:30:15,360
Speaker 3: My partner and I I would say many many ways

607
00:30:15,400 --> 00:30:19,800
Speaker 3: are opposites. There's parts of us. One's more extrovert, ones

608
00:30:19,840 --> 00:30:23,600
Speaker 3: more introvert. We've grown up differently, we're part of different religions,

609
00:30:23,640 --> 00:30:26,040
Speaker 3: we came out at different moments in our life. So

610
00:30:26,120 --> 00:30:30,840
Speaker 3: there's a lot that are definitely more opposite, but we

611
00:30:30,920 --> 00:30:34,280
Speaker 3: do again. We come together on those things that really

612
00:30:34,320 --> 00:30:39,040
Speaker 3: truly matter in a partnership. And I think over time,

613
00:30:39,480 --> 00:30:42,320
Speaker 3: definitely rocking in the beginning, harder in the beginning, for sure,

614
00:30:42,720 --> 00:30:45,720
Speaker 3: but over time we've started to balance each other out

615
00:30:46,440 --> 00:30:50,479
Speaker 3: and bring out the best in one another.

616
00:30:51,720 --> 00:30:54,040
Speaker 2: What's the one thing you think a relationship has to

617
00:30:54,120 --> 00:30:56,640
Speaker 2: have in order for it to work that you all

618
00:30:56,680 --> 00:30:57,720
Speaker 2: have found in order for.

619
00:30:57,680 --> 00:30:58,240
Speaker 1: It to last?

620
00:30:58,440 --> 00:31:04,920
Speaker 3: Communication and transparent communication, because so many of us, I think,

621
00:31:04,960 --> 00:31:08,400
Speaker 3: and I've seen this in relationships over the years. People

622
00:31:08,560 --> 00:31:12,960
Speaker 3: hit a rough patch and they immediately think, oh, it's over,

623
00:31:13,200 --> 00:31:16,640
Speaker 3: like we absolutely have to break up. And my boyfriend

624
00:31:16,680 --> 00:31:20,520
Speaker 3: and I've been dating almost ten years this summer, and congratulations, yes,

625
00:31:20,560 --> 00:31:24,480
Speaker 3: thank you. We've met on Tinder and there's definitely been

626
00:31:24,560 --> 00:31:27,640
Speaker 3: rough patches over the years. There have been really hard

627
00:31:27,680 --> 00:31:31,440
Speaker 3: years and really hard moments in that decade. The reason

628
00:31:31,440 --> 00:31:35,160
Speaker 3: why we're still together is because we've communicated transparently. We've

629
00:31:35,160 --> 00:31:39,880
Speaker 3: had really tough conversations, lots of tears in those conversations,

630
00:31:40,280 --> 00:31:43,040
Speaker 3: and we've made it through the other side because in

631
00:31:43,080 --> 00:31:46,160
Speaker 3: those conversations we've been able to say, you know, these

632
00:31:46,200 --> 00:31:48,560
Speaker 3: are the things we're both struggling with but we want

633
00:31:48,600 --> 00:31:50,240
Speaker 3: to make it work, and here's how we're going to

634
00:31:50,280 --> 00:31:53,040
Speaker 3: make it work, and we'll come up with a process

635
00:31:53,080 --> 00:31:56,760
Speaker 3: that works for us. But if we weren't communicating, we

636
00:31:56,840 --> 00:32:00,720
Speaker 3: would have broken up years and years ago without a

637
00:32:00,760 --> 00:32:04,360
Speaker 3: second thought. So I would say communication is absolutely the

638
00:32:04,400 --> 00:32:06,920
Speaker 3: most important thing that's vital in a relationship.

639
00:32:06,960 --> 00:32:09,520
Speaker 1: Next week, continue with Michael K, global head of communication

640
00:32:09,600 --> 00:32:13,560
Speaker 1: at okay Cubit with maybe some tips for you putting

641
00:32:13,560 --> 00:32:24,240
Speaker 1: that profile together. Stay here, back here with Michael K,

642
00:32:24,400 --> 00:32:26,640
Speaker 1: global head of communication for okay Cube, talking to you

643
00:32:26,720 --> 00:32:32,000
Speaker 1: about match percentages at okayqube. You gave us our percentage

644
00:32:32,000 --> 00:32:33,960
Speaker 1: a short time ago. You say we were eighty four percent.

645
00:32:34,080 --> 00:32:37,280
Speaker 1: I think match what is the average you will kind

646
00:32:37,320 --> 00:32:39,360
Speaker 1: of see on your site.

647
00:32:39,520 --> 00:32:44,640
Speaker 3: It hovers in the seventies to nineties. That's really the

648
00:32:44,680 --> 00:32:48,000
Speaker 3: sweet spot. It's a big range, but it also depends

649
00:32:48,040 --> 00:32:51,800
Speaker 3: on where you're looking in the app as well. We

650
00:32:51,880 --> 00:32:55,280
Speaker 3: actually have a section of the app that's people we

651
00:32:55,360 --> 00:32:58,000
Speaker 3: recommend to you, and there you're going to see people

652
00:32:58,040 --> 00:33:00,880
Speaker 3: with the highest match percentage got so.

653
00:33:00,800 --> 00:33:03,560
Speaker 2: We might not necessarily have been in each other's in box.

654
00:33:03,840 --> 00:33:07,040
Speaker 1: Eighty four percent definitely won okay, okay, okay, good, So

655
00:33:07,160 --> 00:33:10,959
Speaker 1: we're above average. That's what we're above average.

656
00:33:11,080 --> 00:33:14,720
Speaker 2: Okay, you know this is fascinating as my daughters are

657
00:33:14,760 --> 00:33:17,640
Speaker 2: now getting into the dating world. My oldest is twenty one,

658
00:33:17,840 --> 00:33:20,680
Speaker 2: my youngest is about to turn eighteen, and I keep

659
00:33:20,720 --> 00:33:25,280
Speaker 2: hearing this situationship thing thrown around. I saw that you're

660
00:33:25,280 --> 00:33:27,160
Speaker 2: seeing an increase or at least dating apps are seeing

661
00:33:27,200 --> 00:33:31,480
Speaker 2: an increase in ethical non monogamy e NM. I just

662
00:33:31,560 --> 00:33:34,400
Speaker 2: learned what that acronym was. But then I'm hearing situationship

663
00:33:34,400 --> 00:33:36,920
Speaker 2: at home. When people go onto these apps, are you

664
00:33:37,000 --> 00:33:41,440
Speaker 2: seeing generally the younger folks coming in not necessarily looking

665
00:33:41,440 --> 00:33:44,440
Speaker 2: for committed relationships or with some sort of destination in

666
00:33:44,480 --> 00:33:45,880
Speaker 2: mind with their relationship?

667
00:33:46,000 --> 00:33:48,000
Speaker 3: You know, I think it really depends on the app

668
00:33:48,240 --> 00:33:51,800
Speaker 3: that you're looking at. That not every app caters to

669
00:33:51,840 --> 00:33:54,960
Speaker 3: the same demographic. For Okay, keep it. We make you

670
00:33:54,960 --> 00:33:58,160
Speaker 3: do a lot of work, admittedly to get your profile

671
00:33:58,240 --> 00:34:00,560
Speaker 3: up and running. That's actually by design. We want people

672
00:34:00,560 --> 00:34:03,520
Speaker 3: who are taking dating a little bit more seriously, which

673
00:34:03,560 --> 00:34:08,600
Speaker 3: is why we lean a lot heavier in millennials and

674
00:34:09,400 --> 00:34:12,080
Speaker 3: gen zers who are probably out of college.

675
00:34:12,080 --> 00:34:13,240
Speaker 2: Not my daughter's got.

676
00:34:13,040 --> 00:34:18,720
Speaker 3: It, and you brought up ethical non monogamy and situationships.

677
00:34:18,719 --> 00:34:21,000
Speaker 3: I think there's probably a little bit of overlap between

678
00:34:21,000 --> 00:34:23,680
Speaker 3: the two, but they are separate, and I want to

679
00:34:23,680 --> 00:34:28,799
Speaker 3: distinguish between the two. Situationships tend to be between two

680
00:34:28,920 --> 00:34:33,200
Speaker 3: people who really hadn't haven't yet had that conversation about

681
00:34:33,200 --> 00:34:37,160
Speaker 3: what they are, where they're going. They're taking it a

682
00:34:37,160 --> 00:34:42,040
Speaker 3: little bit more slowly and aren't as in a rush

683
00:34:42,160 --> 00:34:44,960
Speaker 3: to say, you know, we're only dating each other, We're

684
00:34:44,960 --> 00:34:49,440
Speaker 3: a boyfriend girlfriend. They might still be dating around. Ethical

685
00:34:49,480 --> 00:34:53,440
Speaker 3: non monogamy is between two people who are committed and

686
00:34:53,560 --> 00:34:57,719
Speaker 3: have chosen in that commitment to open their relationships, and

687
00:34:57,800 --> 00:35:02,759
Speaker 3: we are seeing a ride in that. It's still the minority.

688
00:35:03,360 --> 00:35:07,200
Speaker 3: So when you look at most dating apps, the overwhelming

689
00:35:07,239 --> 00:35:09,480
Speaker 3: majority it's going to be people who are looking for

690
00:35:10,320 --> 00:35:14,759
Speaker 3: monogamous relationships. But you know, we have been seeing for

691
00:35:14,880 --> 00:35:18,960
Speaker 3: years arise in people interested in open relationships. I actually

692
00:35:18,960 --> 00:35:22,319
Speaker 3: don't think it's new. I think we are in a

693
00:35:22,400 --> 00:35:26,960
Speaker 3: time where people are more comfortable having these conversations more openly.

694
00:35:27,000 --> 00:35:28,960
Speaker 1: Okay, you gotta help me here. You said it's not new,

695
00:35:29,000 --> 00:35:31,040
Speaker 1: but it's just a new name or new thing to

696
00:35:31,080 --> 00:35:33,680
Speaker 1: call it. I mean I don't think it's really a

697
00:35:33,719 --> 00:35:36,360
Speaker 1: new trend. I just think we're talking about it more often.

698
00:35:36,560 --> 00:35:39,160
Speaker 1: I think if you asked your parents if they knew

699
00:35:39,160 --> 00:35:42,879
Speaker 1: anyone who had an open relationship, chances are they might

700
00:35:42,920 --> 00:35:45,760
Speaker 1: have known one or two couples. I know my parents,

701
00:35:45,800 --> 00:35:49,040
Speaker 1: who are baby boomers knew a couple like this, and

702
00:35:49,280 --> 00:35:51,960
Speaker 1: my aunt who's a gen xer, knows a couple of

703
00:35:51,960 --> 00:35:54,960
Speaker 1: couples like this. So I think we're just talking about it.

704
00:35:55,000 --> 00:35:57,520
Speaker 1: But do I not have the definition right ethical non monogamy?

705
00:35:57,560 --> 00:36:00,040
Speaker 1: We're just talking about open relationships. Yeah, okay, that's it.

706
00:36:00,280 --> 00:36:04,160
Speaker 1: The trade is throwing me off, okay, but now it's

707
00:36:04,200 --> 00:36:06,560
Speaker 1: being more widely accepted, or being.

708
00:36:06,360 --> 00:36:08,400
Speaker 2: More accepted than it has been in the past perhaps

709
00:36:08,480 --> 00:36:11,440
Speaker 2: and not something to be ashamed of or to hide.

710
00:36:11,520 --> 00:36:14,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, I would say gens. One thing that gen Z

711
00:36:14,800 --> 00:36:18,360
Speaker 3: is just crushing it at is removing stigma for so

712
00:36:18,640 --> 00:36:21,839
Speaker 3: many things in our society, and gen Z are as

713
00:36:21,920 --> 00:36:27,840
Speaker 3: millennials definitely the most open to open relationships. But because

714
00:36:27,880 --> 00:36:30,400
Speaker 3: they're talking about it more, it's really relieving that stigma,

715
00:36:30,440 --> 00:36:32,439
Speaker 3: which is allowing more and more people to talk about

716
00:36:32,520 --> 00:36:34,920
Speaker 3: and say he actually, this is what I'm into and

717
00:36:35,360 --> 00:36:39,279
Speaker 3: that's okay, And you know there's many apps. Okay, if

718
00:36:39,280 --> 00:36:41,560
Speaker 3: you been included, that makes it really easy for you

719
00:36:41,600 --> 00:36:44,000
Speaker 3: to find other people who are looking for this as well.

720
00:36:44,160 --> 00:36:50,000
Speaker 1: Ethical non monogamy. I'm not into that, by the way. Yeah,

721
00:36:50,520 --> 00:36:52,640
Speaker 1: I'm just letting you know. Now I don't even know

722
00:36:52,640 --> 00:36:55,799
Speaker 1: what it is quite yet either, it's but yeah, there

723
00:36:55,800 --> 00:36:57,040
Speaker 1: are people who want and.

724
00:36:56,920 --> 00:36:59,520
Speaker 2: And you know it's great for everyone else if that

725
00:36:59,520 --> 00:37:01,160
Speaker 2: floats your but I'm just letting you.

726
00:37:01,080 --> 00:37:04,080
Speaker 1: Know that it does not blow mine. And she has

727
00:37:04,160 --> 00:37:08,560
Speaker 1: multiple witnesses. Look something for us, and we'll tell you

728
00:37:08,560 --> 00:37:09,360
Speaker 1: the truth here, Michael.

729
00:37:09,560 --> 00:37:10,120
Speaker 2: We have.

730
00:37:11,680 --> 00:37:13,720
Speaker 1: Robes and I have been through a lot together, certainly

731
00:37:13,719 --> 00:37:16,359
Speaker 1: over the past year, year and a half plus, and

732
00:37:16,560 --> 00:37:19,400
Speaker 1: so much of that we've had moments throughout that time

733
00:37:19,480 --> 00:37:23,040
Speaker 1: that are very difficult to where we there's so much

734
00:37:23,120 --> 00:37:25,839
Speaker 1: on the line for us, and there has been and

735
00:37:25,880 --> 00:37:28,000
Speaker 1: for us to be together took so much and there

736
00:37:28,000 --> 00:37:31,000
Speaker 1: was so much sacrifice and you're going into this commitment,

737
00:37:31,520 --> 00:37:34,360
Speaker 1: and there have been moments we had a really probably

738
00:37:34,360 --> 00:37:37,600
Speaker 1: the closest we ever got to our relationship ending was

739
00:37:37,760 --> 00:37:41,880
Speaker 1: a disagreement of fight we had that was really based

740
00:37:42,080 --> 00:37:45,759
Speaker 1: on a fear and a lack of communication to where

741
00:37:45,840 --> 00:37:48,319
Speaker 1: we thought, wow, we went through all this, and we

742
00:37:48,360 --> 00:37:51,560
Speaker 1: went did all this, and maybe we're not compatible or

743
00:37:51,600 --> 00:37:54,719
Speaker 1: maybe we missed something. So we were freaking out a

744
00:37:54,760 --> 00:37:58,440
Speaker 1: little bit. To hear the results today. That is not

745
00:37:58,520 --> 00:38:02,720
Speaker 1: a joke. Well, you're talking about base our first fight, right, Uh,

746
00:38:02,760 --> 00:38:04,719
Speaker 1: it was early. It was one of the first two.

747
00:38:04,800 --> 00:38:05,359
Speaker 1: I would say.

748
00:38:05,480 --> 00:38:09,040
Speaker 2: I think you know, also, we had had such we

749
00:38:09,160 --> 00:38:13,040
Speaker 2: always had fun together. We rarely ever had an issue

750
00:38:13,040 --> 00:38:16,239
Speaker 2: where we disagreed, and we are very like minded. So yeah,

751
00:38:16,239 --> 00:38:19,359
Speaker 2: when the first thing happens the first time, you think,

752
00:38:19,440 --> 00:38:22,200
Speaker 2: oh my god, I don't know this person. I thought

753
00:38:22,239 --> 00:38:24,560
Speaker 2: I knew this person. I don't know that person. So

754
00:38:24,680 --> 00:38:26,960
Speaker 2: I mean that can happen. But the score, I do

755
00:38:27,080 --> 00:38:28,560
Speaker 2: feel now better about it.

756
00:38:28,600 --> 00:38:31,040
Speaker 1: Ah, But like I just met Michael. Now, oh he

757
00:38:31,080 --> 00:38:33,360
Speaker 1: gave us a stambo approval. Now we're gonna be fine.

758
00:38:33,680 --> 00:38:35,680
Speaker 1: But it was one of those things and we were,

759
00:38:36,040 --> 00:38:38,680
Speaker 1: you know, to do it. We got it revealed for

760
00:38:38,719 --> 00:38:40,520
Speaker 1: the first time by you. We didn't know what was

761
00:38:40,560 --> 00:38:42,440
Speaker 1: going to come out of it. But it was as

762
00:38:42,520 --> 00:38:44,480
Speaker 1: much as we're having fun here and talking about it.

763
00:38:44,520 --> 00:38:47,440
Speaker 1: I think everybody deals in that they're looking at a

764
00:38:47,440 --> 00:38:49,840
Speaker 1: percentage score. Okay, I'm matched with ninety percent, so we

765
00:38:49,920 --> 00:38:52,440
Speaker 1: should be good to go. But it's not just an

766
00:38:52,480 --> 00:38:55,759
Speaker 1: exact science and it's not just there's so much involved here.

767
00:38:55,800 --> 00:38:58,720
Speaker 1: So for people who are listening and thinking just about

768
00:38:58,719 --> 00:39:01,080
Speaker 1: a score, I need to get some I lose seventy

769
00:39:01,120 --> 00:39:03,479
Speaker 1: to ninety percent, and if I don't, then that's no good.

770
00:39:03,880 --> 00:39:08,120
Speaker 1: Give those folks some perspective here. You kind of throughout

771
00:39:08,160 --> 00:39:10,240
Speaker 1: you have done so, but just want to remind people

772
00:39:10,239 --> 00:39:12,040
Speaker 1: of that it's not so black and white.

773
00:39:12,080 --> 00:39:14,680
Speaker 3: I also think people need to remember that what we

774
00:39:14,760 --> 00:39:18,400
Speaker 3: watch in a rom com is not reality by any means.

775
00:39:18,520 --> 00:39:23,480
Speaker 3: And I there's something that my parents said years ago,

776
00:39:23,880 --> 00:39:26,160
Speaker 3: way before I ever met my boyfriend or came out

777
00:39:26,160 --> 00:39:29,080
Speaker 3: of the closet or anything that's stuck with me. And

778
00:39:29,120 --> 00:39:32,240
Speaker 3: again they're baby boomers, they have gone through a lot.

779
00:39:32,320 --> 00:39:36,120
Speaker 3: Again I mentioned they've been married over sixty years. But

780
00:39:36,920 --> 00:39:40,839
Speaker 3: they always said people are too quick to give up,

781
00:39:41,480 --> 00:39:44,279
Speaker 3: And that's always in the back of my head in

782
00:39:44,320 --> 00:39:47,319
Speaker 3: my own relationship. That doesn't mean that you should stay

783
00:39:47,320 --> 00:39:50,560
Speaker 3: with the wrong person. Get out if it does not

784
00:39:50,680 --> 00:39:53,120
Speaker 3: make sense for you. And I think in your gut

785
00:39:53,120 --> 00:39:55,120
Speaker 3: you're going to know when it doesn't make sense, but

786
00:39:56,400 --> 00:39:59,719
Speaker 3: one bad fight, one bad week, does not make a

787
00:39:59,760 --> 00:40:03,799
Speaker 3: bad year or a bad relationship. And I think as

788
00:40:03,800 --> 00:40:08,120
Speaker 3: long as you're having that conversation in a very respectful way,

789
00:40:08,800 --> 00:40:12,839
Speaker 3: you can power through those bumps. For me, it's about

790
00:40:12,920 --> 00:40:16,359
Speaker 3: finding that person that you want to weather the storm with.

791
00:40:17,000 --> 00:40:20,040
Speaker 2: I think most people know we have four divorces between us,

792
00:40:20,600 --> 00:40:24,200
Speaker 2: and I had two thirteen year marriages, so it wasn't

793
00:40:24,280 --> 00:40:26,560
Speaker 2: like cutting and running or anything, and a lot of

794
00:40:26,640 --> 00:40:29,800
Speaker 2: lessons learned along the way. But this is one of

795
00:40:29,880 --> 00:40:33,360
Speaker 2: those things where, unfortunately, sometimes you learn the hard way

796
00:40:34,000 --> 00:40:38,640
Speaker 2: what works and what doesn't. And just I'm curious, does

797
00:40:38,640 --> 00:40:41,960
Speaker 2: Okay Cupid follow any of these couples that you put

798
00:40:42,000 --> 00:40:46,080
Speaker 2: together and find out who makes it and who doesn't?

799
00:40:46,120 --> 00:40:48,440
Speaker 2: I mean, have you all done research and given thought

800
00:40:48,440 --> 00:40:50,400
Speaker 2: to that In terms of when people are looking for

801
00:40:50,400 --> 00:40:52,919
Speaker 2: that right person and say they have a really high

802
00:40:52,920 --> 00:40:57,120
Speaker 2: compatibility or a match percentage, What is it about couples

803
00:40:57,120 --> 00:41:00,640
Speaker 2: that makes them stay together or makes them eventually break up?

804
00:41:01,040 --> 00:41:01,320
Speaker 1: Yeah?

805
00:41:01,360 --> 00:41:04,560
Speaker 3: I don't have an exact answer for this. What I

806
00:41:04,600 --> 00:41:08,040
Speaker 3: can say part of my job is managing our social

807
00:41:08,080 --> 00:41:12,600
Speaker 3: media and with that I have the really privilege of

808
00:41:13,080 --> 00:41:15,239
Speaker 3: reading a ton of dms that come in every single

809
00:41:15,360 --> 00:41:18,320
Speaker 3: day from people who have used okay Cupid. And because

810
00:41:18,360 --> 00:41:22,799
Speaker 3: it's a DM, it's private, they're extremely vulnerable. There's a

811
00:41:22,880 --> 00:41:26,880
Speaker 3: ton of them that share their wedding photos, their engagement photos,

812
00:41:26,920 --> 00:41:31,680
Speaker 3: their first children, all those success stories. And that's great.

813
00:41:31,719 --> 00:41:33,759
Speaker 3: And I actually keep a lot of people send us

814
00:41:33,760 --> 00:41:36,600
Speaker 3: wedding invitations. I keep those on my desk every day

815
00:41:36,640 --> 00:41:38,880
Speaker 3: to remind me why I do what I do. But

816
00:41:39,000 --> 00:41:41,800
Speaker 3: what I really love hearing about is the people who

817
00:41:42,400 --> 00:41:45,840
Speaker 3: may have met someone on okay Cupid and not wound

818
00:41:45,880 --> 00:41:49,719
Speaker 3: up with them forever, and they will unpack that for

819
00:41:49,800 --> 00:41:52,800
Speaker 3: me and tell me about that experience. And I think

820
00:41:53,080 --> 00:41:56,239
Speaker 3: we often when a relationship ends, we classify that as

821
00:41:56,280 --> 00:41:58,799
Speaker 3: a failure. We failed, it did not work. That is

822
00:41:58,840 --> 00:42:01,920
Speaker 3: not a failure, just moving on to the next chapter.

823
00:42:02,239 --> 00:42:06,640
Speaker 3: So I actually love hearing those stories of someone who says, I,

824
00:42:06,719 --> 00:42:08,440
Speaker 3: you know, I've met people who said I love Okay

825
00:42:08,480 --> 00:42:10,920
Speaker 3: keep it, but they're single. And people are like, why,

826
00:42:11,200 --> 00:42:12,600
Speaker 3: how do you love a dating app when you're when

827
00:42:12,640 --> 00:42:15,000
Speaker 3: you're single, They're like, well, I had several really great

828
00:42:15,000 --> 00:42:17,560
Speaker 3: partners that I met on that app and it worked

829
00:42:17,560 --> 00:42:19,600
Speaker 3: for me. Might not have worked forever, but it worked

830
00:42:19,600 --> 00:42:20,440
Speaker 3: for me at some point.

831
00:42:20,960 --> 00:42:24,680
Speaker 1: Can you tell folks and the advice to not because

832
00:42:25,160 --> 00:42:27,400
Speaker 1: you've even when I was filling out the questions, I

833
00:42:27,440 --> 00:42:29,520
Speaker 1: don't know if you did this, but you almost look

834
00:42:29,560 --> 00:42:31,680
Speaker 1: at it and you're saying, well, I should say this

835
00:42:31,760 --> 00:42:34,960
Speaker 1: or should I say this? Right, I guess you would

836
00:42:34,960 --> 00:42:38,960
Speaker 1: definitely say you need to be vulnerable, authentic, and yourself

837
00:42:39,160 --> 00:42:42,160
Speaker 1: certainly off the bed and not try to manipulate the

838
00:42:42,239 --> 00:42:44,680
Speaker 1: answers to try to find a certain type of person.

839
00:42:45,320 --> 00:42:47,319
Speaker 3: That is the worst thing you can do is not

840
00:42:47,400 --> 00:42:50,960
Speaker 3: be yourself. And to your point, there's definitely people who

841
00:42:51,000 --> 00:42:53,520
Speaker 3: start out. I think the more questions you answer, you

842
00:42:53,640 --> 00:42:57,160
Speaker 3: kind of forget that you're you stop doing this because

843
00:42:57,160 --> 00:42:59,520
Speaker 3: you become less mindful of it. I think in the beginning,

844
00:42:59,520 --> 00:43:02,799
Speaker 3: people answer the way they think other people want, and

845
00:43:02,840 --> 00:43:05,600
Speaker 3: then as they continue, they just forget about it and

846
00:43:05,640 --> 00:43:08,200
Speaker 3: they're just becoming more and more and more honest. But

847
00:43:08,280 --> 00:43:11,799
Speaker 3: what we see happen if you are putting out a

848
00:43:11,920 --> 00:43:15,359
Speaker 3: version of yourself that you think other people are looking for,

849
00:43:15,480 --> 00:43:18,080
Speaker 3: you're only going to attract people who are looking for

850
00:43:18,239 --> 00:43:21,000
Speaker 3: that version that might not be you. So I tell

851
00:43:21,080 --> 00:43:23,960
Speaker 3: people all the time. If you don't want to be married,

852
00:43:24,320 --> 00:43:27,759
Speaker 3: that's great, say that on your dating app profile. If

853
00:43:27,800 --> 00:43:30,520
Speaker 3: you do not want children, there's nothing wrong with it.

854
00:43:31,000 --> 00:43:34,120
Speaker 3: I'm this is controversial. I'm not a pet person. I

855
00:43:34,120 --> 00:43:35,200
Speaker 3: don't think you guys either.

856
00:43:35,640 --> 00:43:37,680
Speaker 1: You don't say and I have a dog.

857
00:43:37,880 --> 00:43:42,200
Speaker 2: Yeah, and I loved him, but I wouldn't consider myself

858
00:43:42,239 --> 00:43:42,800
Speaker 2: a pet person.

859
00:43:42,840 --> 00:43:45,239
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's not my jam. But I you know, you

860
00:43:45,640 --> 00:43:50,880
Speaker 1: walk house. I mean, he's adorable. I hope he's not

861
00:43:51,000 --> 00:43:53,319
Speaker 1: listening to I know that would be awful if you

862
00:43:53,360 --> 00:43:57,000
Speaker 1: heard what I just said. Do you feel like feeling

863
00:43:57,040 --> 00:43:58,680
Speaker 1: to his point when you were feeling it out? Because

864
00:43:58,680 --> 00:44:00,680
Speaker 1: we were sitting across a table from each other, figling

865
00:44:00,680 --> 00:44:02,640
Speaker 1: it out, and then I hear her crack up laughing

866
00:44:02,680 --> 00:44:04,839
Speaker 1: as she years me make a comment. Did you find

867
00:44:04,880 --> 00:44:06,759
Speaker 1: yourself saying like, what would he say?

868
00:44:07,200 --> 00:44:07,399
Speaker 3: Oh?

869
00:44:07,680 --> 00:44:08,959
Speaker 1: Yes, for sure. Yes.

870
00:44:09,040 --> 00:44:11,239
Speaker 2: I think that's a human experience to want to put

871
00:44:11,280 --> 00:44:13,760
Speaker 2: your best foot forward. But if you actually just admit

872
00:44:13,840 --> 00:44:15,320
Speaker 2: who you are, it's going to be better in the

873
00:44:15,400 --> 00:44:18,279
Speaker 2: end because they're gonna find out absolutely.

874
00:44:17,719 --> 00:44:20,040
Speaker 3: And I think putting your best foot forward is still

875
00:44:20,080 --> 00:44:22,879
Speaker 3: showing who you are. There's nothing wrong with what you're

876
00:44:22,880 --> 00:44:25,279
Speaker 3: interested in or what you're looking for, But you have

877
00:44:25,320 --> 00:44:27,360
Speaker 3: to be honest about it because otherwise you're going to

878
00:44:27,440 --> 00:44:29,960
Speaker 3: waste your time and you're gonna waste the other person's

879
00:44:30,000 --> 00:44:32,880
Speaker 3: time if you are just not looking for the same things.

880
00:44:33,000 --> 00:44:34,120
Speaker 1: Same with the photos.

881
00:44:34,800 --> 00:44:36,640
Speaker 2: You know, I know there's a lot of filters out there,

882
00:44:36,680 --> 00:44:37,800
Speaker 2: but what would you suggest?

883
00:44:38,280 --> 00:44:41,759
Speaker 3: No filters, no group photos. If you're going to do

884
00:44:41,800 --> 00:44:44,600
Speaker 3: group photos, save it for the end of your like

885
00:44:44,719 --> 00:44:50,000
Speaker 3: little scroll of photos, and ditch the selfies. I love

886
00:44:50,040 --> 00:44:52,720
Speaker 3: a selfie. It took like three on the way here today.

887
00:44:52,760 --> 00:44:55,319
Speaker 1: Oh so did I. However, I don't need to see

888
00:44:55,360 --> 00:44:57,000
Speaker 1: that on your dating app profile.

889
00:44:57,600 --> 00:45:00,200
Speaker 3: Use I. You know, when you put any thing on

890
00:45:00,239 --> 00:45:02,600
Speaker 3: your profile, whether it's photos or something you're writing in,

891
00:45:03,120 --> 00:45:06,279
Speaker 3: I always like to think, what's the purpose that this

892
00:45:06,440 --> 00:45:11,160
Speaker 3: is serving? Is it serving as a conversation starter? Is

893
00:45:11,360 --> 00:45:14,160
Speaker 3: it showing someone what I'm interested in? So if I

894
00:45:14,239 --> 00:45:17,640
Speaker 3: were to create a dating app profile today, I would

895
00:45:17,640 --> 00:45:20,359
Speaker 3: post a photo of the first half marathon I ran,

896
00:45:21,000 --> 00:45:25,760
Speaker 3: me at Taylor Swift's aerostour, me at the Harry Potter

897
00:45:25,800 --> 00:45:29,120
Speaker 3: World in London, because what those photos are going to

898
00:45:29,200 --> 00:45:31,640
Speaker 3: do is one it's going to tell people my hobbies

899
00:45:31,680 --> 00:45:34,320
Speaker 3: and what I'm interested in. It also gives them something

900
00:45:34,320 --> 00:45:37,239
Speaker 3: to say to me, because hey, hi, hello. Actually have

901
00:45:37,320 --> 00:45:40,840
Speaker 3: the highest rate of being ignored on dating apps. But

902
00:45:40,960 --> 00:45:44,600
Speaker 3: by those three photos alone, someone can say what era

903
00:45:44,719 --> 00:45:48,120
Speaker 3: are you in? Or which was your favorite book or movie?

904
00:45:48,840 --> 00:45:51,880
Speaker 3: Or are you training for the New York City Marathon?

905
00:45:52,480 --> 00:45:55,800
Speaker 3: And you immediately jump into this conversation that's grounded in

906
00:45:56,400 --> 00:45:58,280
Speaker 3: something you're already comfortable speaking about.

907
00:45:58,360 --> 00:45:59,360
Speaker 1: What would your pictures be?

908
00:45:59,560 --> 00:46:02,480
Speaker 2: I knew you were announced me that for sure, the

909
00:46:02,480 --> 00:46:04,799
Speaker 2: New York City Marathon because that's a huge part of

910
00:46:05,239 --> 00:46:08,680
Speaker 2: my life. I know you said no group photos, but

911
00:46:08,680 --> 00:46:10,719
Speaker 2: I would definitely want my daughters, just for people to

912
00:46:10,719 --> 00:46:13,319
Speaker 2: know that I'm a mother, because that's a huge part

913
00:46:13,360 --> 00:46:19,319
Speaker 2: of who I am. And maybe me eating popcorn, watching

914
00:46:19,320 --> 00:46:19,959
Speaker 2: a horror movie.

915
00:46:20,000 --> 00:46:20,440
Speaker 1: I don't know.

916
00:46:22,960 --> 00:46:25,879
Speaker 2: Wow, I don't know, climbing a mountain, hiking that would

917
00:46:25,880 --> 00:46:27,160
Speaker 2: have turned you off immediately.

918
00:46:27,520 --> 00:46:31,640
Speaker 1: All of yours probably would have turned me off. I

919
00:46:31,760 --> 00:46:34,720
Speaker 1: don't know what we would imagine yours, Oh that's easy.

920
00:46:34,840 --> 00:46:38,840
Speaker 1: Me be cooking, me standing next to a razorback of

921
00:46:38,880 --> 00:46:42,439
Speaker 1: some kind probably and maybe running at this point.

922
00:46:42,520 --> 00:46:44,560
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, Georgia football would probably be a part.

923
00:46:44,440 --> 00:46:47,120
Speaker 1: Of it, maybe with a drink in hand, making mixing

924
00:46:47,120 --> 00:46:50,239
Speaker 1: a drink. Yeah, we've definitely connected over college football too.

925
00:46:50,280 --> 00:46:53,839
Speaker 1: That was another common thread we had. Michael. This has

926
00:46:53,840 --> 00:46:57,640
Speaker 1: been great. Thank you for giving our relationship the stamp

927
00:46:57,680 --> 00:47:01,200
Speaker 1: of approval. We've been looking for that palidation for a long.

928
00:47:01,040 --> 00:47:05,719
Speaker 2: Time and Michael Kay just gave it to us and

929
00:47:05,760 --> 00:47:08,319
Speaker 2: hopefully some some things to think about as you all

930
00:47:08,800 --> 00:47:11,920
Speaker 2: continue your journey and looking for that special someone.

931
00:47:12,040 --> 00:47:15,279
Speaker 1: Yeah, stay at it, folks. It's okay. And like you said,

932
00:47:15,280 --> 00:47:17,560
Speaker 1: I think that was great advice. It's okay. You're not

933
00:47:17,600 --> 00:47:20,200
Speaker 1: a failure because of relationship ends. You're moving on to

934
00:47:20,280 --> 00:47:21,799
Speaker 1: the next thing or maybe that was where you were

935
00:47:21,800 --> 00:47:23,319
Speaker 1: supposed to be at that point in your life and

936
00:47:23,640 --> 00:47:25,480
Speaker 1: you need somebody to take you through the next the

937
00:47:25,520 --> 00:47:27,239
Speaker 1: next phase of your life. So that was a great, great,

938
00:47:27,239 --> 00:47:29,440
Speaker 1: great advice. So it's a pleasure having you. Hope we

939
00:47:29,440 --> 00:47:30,759
Speaker 1: can have you back and you're here and here in

940
00:47:30,760 --> 00:47:31,879
Speaker 1: town with us, right in New York.

941
00:47:32,000 --> 00:47:35,240
Speaker 3: Yeah absolutely, I will. I will venture more downtown for both.

942
00:47:35,000 --> 00:47:38,480
Speaker 2: Of you, honest, all right, and after dry January preferably, I'm.

943
00:47:38,360 --> 00:47:39,400
Speaker 1: Doing dry January as well.

944
00:47:39,480 --> 00:47:40,960
Speaker 3: Oh you are, Oh.

945
00:47:40,760 --> 00:47:42,719
Speaker 2: Gosh, Okay, I feel so much better now, and.

946
00:47:42,640 --> 00:47:45,760
Speaker 3: I actually will say I did dry August and I

947
00:47:45,800 --> 00:47:49,200
Speaker 3: carried into September. I wasn't in a rush. Wow, I'm

948
00:47:49,200 --> 00:47:51,880
Speaker 3: get interested to see how February first goes for you.

949
00:47:52,040 --> 00:47:54,960
Speaker 2: Well, February sixth is my birthday, so I will most

950
00:47:55,160 --> 00:47:59,040
Speaker 2: certainly have some have some drinks in my hands.

951
00:47:59,080 --> 00:48:03,960
Speaker 1: So problem Michael, really, thank you so much, and folks,

952
00:48:04,000 --> 00:48:06,080
Speaker 1: thank you all as well. I hope you got something

953
00:48:06,080 --> 00:48:08,919
Speaker 1: out of this conversation today besides just a little fun.

954
00:48:09,000 --> 00:48:13,279
Speaker 1: So our takeaway here is, by all means, enjoy your

955
00:48:13,360 --> 00:48:18,239
Speaker 1: dry January, happy dating. Go see American Fiction. What else

956
00:48:18,360 --> 00:48:19,040
Speaker 1: does it takeaway?

957
00:48:19,200 --> 00:48:22,600
Speaker 2: And for every relationship there is a reason, a season,

958
00:48:22,719 --> 00:48:24,920
Speaker 2: or lifetime, and it's okay if they fall into any

959
00:48:24,960 --> 00:48:26,040
Speaker 2: of those three categories.

960
00:48:26,120 --> 00:48:29,359
Speaker 1: All right, folks, Well Amy and TJ. Here You can

961
00:48:29,400 --> 00:48:33,759
Speaker 1: follow the show at on Instagram at Amy and TJ Podcast.

962
00:48:34,160 --> 00:48:36,840
Speaker 1: You can follow both of us on Instagram as well,

963
00:48:36,880 --> 00:48:40,200
Speaker 1: But for now, this is Amy and TJ, the eighty

964
00:48:40,280 --> 00:48:42,759
Speaker 1: four percent couple. Drop the mic