1 00:00:00,160 --> 00:00:11,440 Speaker 1: Family Secrets is a production of I Heart Radio. I'm 2 00:00:11,520 --> 00:00:15,640 Speaker 1: Danny Shapiro, and this is family Secrets, the secrets that 3 00:00:15,680 --> 00:00:18,520 Speaker 1: are kept from us, the secrets we keep from others, 4 00:00:19,000 --> 00:00:22,919 Speaker 1: and the secrets we keep from ourselves. As I tore 5 00:00:23,000 --> 00:00:26,279 Speaker 1: the nation from my book Inheritance, I've heard from so 6 00:00:26,320 --> 00:00:29,880 Speaker 1: many about your own family secrets and realize that what 7 00:00:30,000 --> 00:00:33,000 Speaker 1: we are creating for each other on this podcast is 8 00:00:33,040 --> 00:00:35,920 Speaker 1: a community, a community for those who are looking for 9 00:00:35,960 --> 00:00:40,479 Speaker 1: a safe and supportive space to unburden themselves. To that end, 10 00:00:40,520 --> 00:00:43,600 Speaker 1: we've created a number for listeners to call in to 11 00:00:43,720 --> 00:00:48,160 Speaker 1: record stories to share here in this space. This week, 12 00:00:48,560 --> 00:00:50,599 Speaker 1: I'd like to share a few of those stories from 13 00:00:50,640 --> 00:00:56,520 Speaker 1: our community. Thanks for listening. I have lost most of 14 00:00:56,560 --> 00:01:01,680 Speaker 1: my family and on a whim, I sent my DNA 15 00:01:02,160 --> 00:01:09,120 Speaker 1: into ancestry and low and behold found out that I 16 00:01:09,240 --> 00:01:13,280 Speaker 1: have a cousin whose father was adopted. UM a very 17 00:01:13,400 --> 00:01:17,679 Speaker 1: very close relation where UM like first or second cousins. 18 00:01:19,000 --> 00:01:21,880 Speaker 1: I don't know the details and if we share a 19 00:01:21,920 --> 00:01:27,200 Speaker 1: great grandfather or a grandfather, but UM, we have really connected. 20 00:01:27,200 --> 00:01:29,960 Speaker 1: And losing all my family, it's been just a warful 21 00:01:30,000 --> 00:01:34,960 Speaker 1: experience to have someone come into my life that's family, 22 00:01:35,000 --> 00:01:38,760 Speaker 1: and I believed for him as well, because he's never 23 00:01:38,840 --> 00:01:43,520 Speaker 1: had a blood relative like this um that's appeared. So 24 00:01:43,680 --> 00:01:47,280 Speaker 1: we're actually planning a vacation. We met in person, and 25 00:01:47,280 --> 00:01:51,320 Speaker 1: we're planning a vacation and going to Louise this fall. 26 00:01:51,560 --> 00:01:55,800 Speaker 1: So it's from it's definitely worth it to step out 27 00:01:55,840 --> 00:02:04,240 Speaker 1: there and see what comes back. Thanks. Hi. This isn't 28 00:02:04,440 --> 00:02:07,520 Speaker 1: probably my secret to tell, but I wanted to share 29 00:02:07,520 --> 00:02:09,679 Speaker 1: it because I love the healing that has come out 30 00:02:09,680 --> 00:02:13,800 Speaker 1: of it. So I have an aunt that um, my 31 00:02:13,919 --> 00:02:15,600 Speaker 1: family and I had gone to stay with for a 32 00:02:15,600 --> 00:02:18,680 Speaker 1: few summers after my parents got divorced, and and she 33 00:02:18,840 --> 00:02:22,840 Speaker 1: was always somebody who was super into everything had to 34 00:02:22,880 --> 00:02:25,560 Speaker 1: look perfect, everything had to be just right and done 35 00:02:25,560 --> 00:02:28,200 Speaker 1: in just the right way. A very strict person, but 36 00:02:28,240 --> 00:02:31,160 Speaker 1: a very kind hearted person obviously since she took us in, 37 00:02:32,000 --> 00:02:33,680 Speaker 1: but she was really hard to get along with a 38 00:02:33,720 --> 00:02:37,079 Speaker 1: lot of times. And another detail that goes with it 39 00:02:37,120 --> 00:02:40,160 Speaker 1: is that my family is Mormon or Latter Day Saint, 40 00:02:40,440 --> 00:02:43,360 Speaker 1: and so images are even that much more important to 41 00:02:43,400 --> 00:02:46,560 Speaker 1: them in a lot of ways, um, And and that 42 00:02:46,720 --> 00:02:49,560 Speaker 1: was very much apparent through her life and the way 43 00:02:49,600 --> 00:02:51,680 Speaker 1: that she treated us and her family and her children 44 00:02:51,760 --> 00:02:57,000 Speaker 1: in particular. Well, Um, it was really interesting because her 45 00:02:57,440 --> 00:03:00,480 Speaker 1: son UM was given a DNA pad us by his 46 00:03:00,520 --> 00:03:04,520 Speaker 1: in laws a few years ago and it turned out 47 00:03:04,560 --> 00:03:07,680 Speaker 1: that he had a half brother match that he had 48 00:03:07,720 --> 00:03:10,160 Speaker 1: never known about. And it turned out that this aunt, 49 00:03:10,240 --> 00:03:14,560 Speaker 1: who had such an obsession over perfection, UM had to 50 00:03:14,639 --> 00:03:16,880 Speaker 1: give up a baby for adoption when she was nineteen 51 00:03:16,960 --> 00:03:20,639 Speaker 1: years old, and so Um they finally got to find 52 00:03:20,680 --> 00:03:23,200 Speaker 1: out about that they all had a bigger brother. This 53 00:03:23,360 --> 00:03:26,640 Speaker 1: is the oldest brother out of six children in total 54 00:03:26,760 --> 00:03:30,400 Speaker 1: for for my aunt, and from what I understand, when 55 00:03:30,440 --> 00:03:34,160 Speaker 1: it came out, my aunt was very reluctant to talk 56 00:03:34,200 --> 00:03:37,040 Speaker 1: about it at first, but eventually, over a couple of 57 00:03:37,080 --> 00:03:41,920 Speaker 1: weeks UM, after my cousin had gotten the message that 58 00:03:41,960 --> 00:03:44,880 Speaker 1: he might have a brother in law, she finally decided 59 00:03:44,920 --> 00:03:48,840 Speaker 1: to open up. And it's been really awesome to see 60 00:03:48,960 --> 00:03:51,240 Speaker 1: because I didn't know that this had happened a few 61 00:03:51,320 --> 00:03:53,480 Speaker 1: years ago, but just from the outside looking at it, 62 00:03:53,520 --> 00:03:56,600 Speaker 1: I've definitely seen her soft in over the years and 63 00:03:56,680 --> 00:04:00,320 Speaker 1: being less judgmental and and less uptight about how things 64 00:04:00,360 --> 00:04:03,720 Speaker 1: looked in appearents and and it directly correlates with the 65 00:04:03,800 --> 00:04:06,760 Speaker 1: time when she was coming up to her immediate family 66 00:04:06,840 --> 00:04:09,000 Speaker 1: that she had a son that they've never told them about, 67 00:04:09,520 --> 00:04:12,720 Speaker 1: and the fact that they had all accepted and embraced 68 00:04:12,720 --> 00:04:16,600 Speaker 1: her still even though it wasn't a part of their religion, 69 00:04:16,680 --> 00:04:19,039 Speaker 1: they still loved her and they opened it up. And 70 00:04:19,040 --> 00:04:20,960 Speaker 1: and I just find that to be an amazing and 71 00:04:21,000 --> 00:04:24,039 Speaker 1: truly healing story. And and it tells about our time 72 00:04:24,480 --> 00:04:27,719 Speaker 1: nowadays that were so much more accepting about things that 73 00:04:27,760 --> 00:04:30,159 Speaker 1: could be perceived as mistakes or even are starting to 74 00:04:30,200 --> 00:04:33,640 Speaker 1: be redefined as not mistakes, but these things that happened, 75 00:04:33,920 --> 00:04:37,160 Speaker 1: And and I just love that. So thanks so much 76 00:04:37,160 --> 00:04:39,440 Speaker 1: for everything you've been sharing, and I hope that this 77 00:04:39,520 --> 00:04:45,520 Speaker 1: continues to help people heal. Goodbye. This podcast has been 78 00:04:45,920 --> 00:04:50,200 Speaker 1: extremely helpful to me as my family and I have 79 00:04:50,640 --> 00:04:54,640 Speaker 1: gone through finding out our own family secret this past 80 00:04:54,680 --> 00:04:57,600 Speaker 1: little while. Of finding out and we had a half 81 00:04:57,760 --> 00:05:01,080 Speaker 1: plaint that we were not aware of, and in listening 82 00:05:01,320 --> 00:05:06,720 Speaker 1: to other stories and other people's experiences of dealing with 83 00:05:07,120 --> 00:05:10,560 Speaker 1: their family secrets, that has been incredibly powerful and incredibly 84 00:05:10,960 --> 00:05:14,320 Speaker 1: wonderful and strengthening for me and for my family as 85 00:05:14,320 --> 00:05:26,640 Speaker 1: we're going through our own journey. If you'd like to 86 00:05:26,640 --> 00:05:30,640 Speaker 1: share your story, call one eight eight eight Secret zero 87 00:05:31,160 --> 00:05:34,000 Speaker 1: and record your story. We won't be able to run 88 00:05:34,040 --> 00:05:35,800 Speaker 1: all the stories, but we do want to shine a 89 00:05:35,880 --> 00:05:38,640 Speaker 1: light on as many as we can. The number again 90 00:05:38,839 --> 00:05:43,159 Speaker 1: is one eight eight eight Secret and then the numeral zero. 91 00:05:55,040 --> 00:05:57,359 Speaker 1: For more podcasts for my Heart Radio, visit the i 92 00:05:57,440 --> 00:06:00,520 Speaker 1: heart Radio app, Apple podcast, or wherever you listen to 93 00:06:00,560 --> 00:06:01,360 Speaker 1: your favorite shows.