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Speaker 1: I have scientific news start the show this morning. Guys,

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Speaker 1: here's the headlight. Are you ready? I want you all

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Speaker 1: to be very, very vigilant out here in these streets. Okay,

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Speaker 1: hyper sexual zombie cicadas with STDs are flying around.

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Speaker 2: I'm cutting down the.

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Speaker 1: Trees in my house same way, zombie. No this is

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Speaker 1: this is a real headline. Hyper Sexual zombie cicadas with STDs.

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Speaker 2: Flying around this place is crazy. Man, I'm ready.

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Speaker 1: Lord, So let me look at the sun today, right right?

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Speaker 1: You know what, I'm just gonna look up until I

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Speaker 1: can't see anything anymore.

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Speaker 2: Don't do it, don't do it.

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Speaker 1: Don't do it. I'm just gonna fly my airplane until

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Speaker 1: I touch the sun.

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Speaker 2: Scared out here.

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Speaker 1: So cicadas, you know, the bugs, right, and they live

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Speaker 1: in trees and they make those noises in the summertime,

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Speaker 1: usually at night. Right. I guess it's there all the time.

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Speaker 1: I don't know, but a bunch of zombie cicadas with

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Speaker 1: the fungal disease that makes them hyper sexual will descend

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Speaker 1: on the East Coast this summer. I have that same disease.

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Speaker 1: It makes me hyper sexual. I don't have the SCD

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Speaker 1: part though. These cicadas are infected with a sexually transmitted

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Speaker 1: fungal pathogen that makes their genitals fall off, and it

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Speaker 1: places their entire backside with a chalky white stub shut off.

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Speaker 1: A professor of forest psychology at West Virginia University said,

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Speaker 1: the infected cicadas can still go around and do their

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Speaker 1: normal activities. It basically amounts of flying around and mating

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Speaker 1: with other cicadas because the fungus causes production of a

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Speaker 1: stamina boosting substances is the X files remix. Yes, it

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Speaker 1: also causes sexually frustrated cicadas to try and mate with

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Speaker 1: twice as many partners as normal. So for meals, for example,

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Speaker 1: they'll continue to try and with females unsuccessfully because again

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Speaker 1: their back end is a fungus. They'll also pretend to

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Speaker 1: be females to get males to come to those and

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Speaker 1: that doubles the number of cicadas that an infected individual

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Speaker 1: comes in contact with. Wow. Wow, so your stuff falls

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Speaker 1: off and you still need to get some, so you

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Speaker 1: just pretend like it's supposed to be that way.

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Speaker 2: It's not supposed to be here because this is wild wow,

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Speaker 2: rapid up cicadas.

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Speaker 1: I'm very concerned. So the expert urged, this is the

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Speaker 1: this is the line of the story. Are you ready.

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Speaker 1: The expert urged people not to kill or eat the bugs,

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Speaker 1: but instead take photos that researchers can continue to gather data.

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Speaker 1: So we have to actually issue a statement. Don't eat them.

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Speaker 1: Don't eat I don't know if you eat cicadas anyway,

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Speaker 1: but don't eat the ones with STU Yeah, don't eat

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Speaker 1: the ones that have the hypersexual zombie cicada std fungal stump.

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Speaker 2: How does a cicada act like a woman? Like? How

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Speaker 2: does it? How does like a male cicada? You know,

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Speaker 2: try to trick like, what would they do?

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Speaker 1: Do they do? You do whatever? It takes makeup? But

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Speaker 1: you're hyper sexual trying to get in there.

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Speaker 2: You go, Hey, it's me, I'm just a woman. Cicada.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, you look and then you touch it, and then

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Speaker 1: you've got it and then your stuff falls off. We

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Speaker 1: get it. Well, if you're a cicada, okay, but I

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Speaker 1: don't say that they touch one, So why are you

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Speaker 1: touching cicada?

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Speaker 2: Don't if it flds on me or something. Oh god,

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Speaker 2: he's gonna be stressed for.

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Speaker 1: Full up on cheaters, adding a new excuse to the list.

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Speaker 1: Someone texted, yeah, I got the I got that hyper

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Speaker 1: sexual zombie cicada thing. That's so funny if you're nu

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Speaker 1: away from me. So bugs on Piagres. Somebody said, I

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Speaker 1: don't know. I read that story this morning. I was like, well,

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Speaker 1: I mean, it's my job to inform the public about

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Speaker 1: about health matters that concern you and us. So anyway,

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Speaker 1: be careful. Uh, look out for the cicadas that are

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Speaker 1: with knubs that are trying to run into everybody.

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Speaker 2: Right, No,