1 00:00:00,360 --> 00:00:03,160 Speaker 1: Oh, listen after this and seeing myself every time we 2 00:00:03,240 --> 00:00:10,399 Speaker 1: do this, I am definitely having a facelift. Okay, Alsa, 3 00:00:10,920 --> 00:00:14,760 Speaker 1: got my headphones on, got my everything going, The microphone 4 00:00:14,840 --> 00:00:18,119 Speaker 1: is working, I can see everybody. Who are we going 5 00:00:18,160 --> 00:00:21,320 Speaker 1: to talk about today? Today we're gonna have a special 6 00:00:21,400 --> 00:00:26,680 Speaker 1: day Merrow posters. Daughter Ava and her mother Sue are 7 00:00:26,720 --> 00:00:30,240 Speaker 1: going to have a conversation. Is that our merrow? It's 8 00:00:30,280 --> 00:00:34,440 Speaker 1: our narrow poster. Who's the creator of Call your Grandmother? Oh, 9 00:00:34,479 --> 00:00:37,440 Speaker 1: I'm really looking forward to this. It should be fabulous. 10 00:00:37,479 --> 00:00:49,000 Speaker 1: They're two fabulous ladies. A little girl, a teenager too fast. 11 00:00:49,000 --> 00:00:53,200 Speaker 1: A little girl, You'll be a real pain to the ass. 12 00:00:53,920 --> 00:00:57,240 Speaker 1: You'll go to school and act so cool and do 13 00:00:57,360 --> 00:01:02,480 Speaker 1: all the teenage stuff. Little girl, you're not a little 14 00:01:02,560 --> 00:01:15,280 Speaker 1: girl long a. This is too I'm not going to 15 00:01:15,360 --> 00:01:19,360 Speaker 1: say her age, but she is fun. She's funky, very fresh. 16 00:01:20,080 --> 00:01:23,000 Speaker 1: With Grammy, nothing can be described as boring. You know. 17 00:01:23,120 --> 00:01:26,280 Speaker 1: Sometimes I'd say things and do things just for the 18 00:01:26,319 --> 00:01:29,640 Speaker 1: outrageousness of the pido, so we could get a lot 19 00:01:29,440 --> 00:01:32,959 Speaker 1: out of it. Grammy has a photographic memory. If you 20 00:01:33,000 --> 00:01:35,040 Speaker 1: give her the name of a song, she can sing 21 00:01:35,080 --> 00:01:39,240 Speaker 1: a song that goes with that word should wed Grammy, alright, 22 00:01:39,319 --> 00:01:43,680 Speaker 1: just don't embarrass me after that interruption. My best friend's 23 00:01:43,760 --> 00:01:49,600 Speaker 1: name is Lily, Lily, Lily of the Valley, Lily Lily, 24 00:01:49,680 --> 00:01:56,440 Speaker 1: Let's red BALLI zupp keep your eyes on the road, etcetera. 25 00:01:57,160 --> 00:02:00,760 Speaker 1: I've been wearing the same perfume for forty years and 26 00:02:00,920 --> 00:02:03,640 Speaker 1: she always loved it. So before she went to camp, 27 00:02:03,680 --> 00:02:06,760 Speaker 1: I took my perfume dad to a house and I 28 00:02:06,840 --> 00:02:10,120 Speaker 1: sprated all over hot pillows that she was taking to camp. 29 00:02:10,400 --> 00:02:12,360 Speaker 1: So when she got to camp, she would spell me. 30 00:02:13,080 --> 00:02:16,720 Speaker 1: She is really funny. Everything she says is like, uh, 31 00:02:16,840 --> 00:02:19,720 Speaker 1: there's always a joke because she's very musical. She's been 32 00:02:19,760 --> 00:02:23,079 Speaker 1: a very very important part of my life. She's the 33 00:02:23,120 --> 00:02:26,840 Speaker 1: best and I love her. Nobody has given me the 34 00:02:26,960 --> 00:02:37,560 Speaker 1: joy and by life that Ava has given me. Growing up. 35 00:02:37,760 --> 00:02:40,680 Speaker 1: I guess they had a really small bladder. So we 36 00:02:40,680 --> 00:02:42,880 Speaker 1: would wander into bathrooms and we made it like a game. 37 00:02:42,880 --> 00:02:45,200 Speaker 1: It was like, oh does this I was really small, 38 00:02:45,200 --> 00:02:47,480 Speaker 1: so it's the hook low enough that I could reach it. 39 00:02:47,560 --> 00:02:50,920 Speaker 1: It never was are there flowers? Is it nice lighting? 40 00:02:51,000 --> 00:02:52,720 Speaker 1: And then it just became a thing and we're like, yeah, 41 00:02:52,760 --> 00:02:54,959 Speaker 1: we're going to write a book. On the best bathrooms 42 00:02:54,960 --> 00:02:57,200 Speaker 1: in New York, the best bath and the worst, and 43 00:02:57,280 --> 00:03:01,679 Speaker 1: we took notes and we rated them from one to ted. Yeah. 44 00:03:01,919 --> 00:03:05,520 Speaker 1: Grammy famously likes to kidnap me, so she would just 45 00:03:05,560 --> 00:03:08,600 Speaker 1: capture me after school and we would like do debaucherous things. 46 00:03:09,120 --> 00:03:11,240 Speaker 1: I would take Gavid during the day. We rode up 47 00:03:11,240 --> 00:03:13,520 Speaker 1: to yachters and we this bathroom looked like it was 48 00:03:13,600 --> 00:03:17,600 Speaker 1: over the bridge. Rebepperave it felt like you were on 49 00:03:17,680 --> 00:03:20,040 Speaker 1: a ship in the middle of the river. Yeah, I 50 00:03:20,040 --> 00:03:24,000 Speaker 1: mean it was gorgeous and the view was incredible. Grammy 51 00:03:24,040 --> 00:03:26,239 Speaker 1: has kind of always been with me. We would do 52 00:03:26,280 --> 00:03:29,200 Speaker 1: like cooking classes together. She would take me to dance lessons, 53 00:03:29,639 --> 00:03:32,720 Speaker 1: and we've always been extremely close. She taught me to 54 00:03:32,720 --> 00:03:35,040 Speaker 1: play pick up six and jacks to make sure I 55 00:03:35,040 --> 00:03:37,600 Speaker 1: went to camp with all of the necessary skills. We 56 00:03:37,680 --> 00:03:40,280 Speaker 1: did all different things. We went to Butterfly World. We 57 00:03:40,320 --> 00:03:43,520 Speaker 1: went to play a miniature golf. Yeah. But now in 58 00:03:43,560 --> 00:03:47,040 Speaker 1: the pandemic, it's just helping the pandemic. I haven't sea. Yeah. 59 00:03:47,040 --> 00:03:48,680 Speaker 1: Have I seen you once? I mean I've seen you 60 00:03:48,720 --> 00:03:51,680 Speaker 1: since March, right. Yeah. Well, she came to the house 61 00:03:51,880 --> 00:03:56,000 Speaker 1: twice this summer and she took a few things. She 62 00:03:56,120 --> 00:04:00,040 Speaker 1: wears some of my old Yeah, her old clothes. He 63 00:04:00,080 --> 00:04:02,600 Speaker 1: has like these like old scars that will tie into talk. 64 00:04:02,680 --> 00:04:04,920 Speaker 1: And I used to always wear a belt and a 65 00:04:05,040 --> 00:04:14,920 Speaker 1: shirt with the collar up. I look like Rizzo from Greece. Terrific. 66 00:04:15,240 --> 00:04:19,440 Speaker 1: And I love the relationship between the grandmother and that 67 00:04:19,640 --> 00:04:23,200 Speaker 1: thing with the rating of the bathrooms. That's the funniest 68 00:04:23,240 --> 00:04:26,039 Speaker 1: thing I ever heard. Every time she opens him out, 69 00:04:26,200 --> 00:04:28,880 Speaker 1: I think to myself, as soon as this thing is over, 70 00:04:28,920 --> 00:04:31,760 Speaker 1: I'm having her here for lunch. I mean, she is 71 00:04:32,000 --> 00:04:40,720 Speaker 1: just like, invite me, Allen, you're a good cook. Okay. 72 00:04:40,760 --> 00:04:45,520 Speaker 1: I'm reading these part titles, and part one says Ellie 73 00:04:45,520 --> 00:04:53,360 Speaker 1: Grammy Graham. I wonder what that is, Grammy. Her use 74 00:04:53,400 --> 00:04:56,320 Speaker 1: of social media could possibly be characterized as her miss 75 00:04:56,360 --> 00:05:00,440 Speaker 1: use of social media now that she's taken to Instagram 76 00:05:00,440 --> 00:05:06,880 Speaker 1: and Facebook. Sometimes she accidentally live streams I'm like fun 77 00:05:08,000 --> 00:05:11,760 Speaker 1: over a dress rewa. So the first time that happened, 78 00:05:11,800 --> 00:05:14,080 Speaker 1: I get a text from my best friend Sam. She 79 00:05:14,200 --> 00:05:17,800 Speaker 1: was like, get on Facebook right now, Grammy's live streaming. 80 00:05:18,360 --> 00:05:21,479 Speaker 1: So we're all on Facebook. All of my friends and 81 00:05:21,520 --> 00:05:23,840 Speaker 1: my cousins were all texting. We're like, who's gonna tell her, 82 00:05:24,200 --> 00:05:26,839 Speaker 1: I'm just hearing a baptist though. Yeah, you kept like 83 00:05:26,920 --> 00:05:28,919 Speaker 1: tapping the button. It was like click click click. You 84 00:05:28,960 --> 00:05:30,880 Speaker 1: were just sitting there and then you put like a 85 00:05:31,040 --> 00:05:35,320 Speaker 1: filter on yourself. I was crying. I don't have any 86 00:05:35,360 --> 00:05:39,719 Speaker 1: recollection that live. Same incident became the inspiration for Eli 87 00:05:39,800 --> 00:05:43,240 Speaker 1: Grammy Graham, an Instagram account my cousins and I made 88 00:05:43,240 --> 00:05:46,680 Speaker 1: for a Grandma. It's all about the face, that's the trouble. 89 00:05:47,000 --> 00:05:50,120 Speaker 1: It's all about the base that's the trouble. It's at 90 00:05:50,160 --> 00:05:53,360 Speaker 1: at that the base that's the trouble. But told me, 91 00:05:54,080 --> 00:05:56,599 Speaker 1: I mean, it was basically about my grandma, like all 92 00:05:56,600 --> 00:05:59,960 Speaker 1: the ridiculous stuff she does and all of the accidental 93 00:06:00,040 --> 00:06:03,200 Speaker 1: selfie she takes, and when she sings rap songs in 94 00:06:03,200 --> 00:06:07,040 Speaker 1: the car to like melodies and niche is so confusing 95 00:06:08,320 --> 00:06:15,080 Speaker 1: and it was really never meant to be anything past. 96 00:06:15,240 --> 00:06:17,720 Speaker 1: Like my family and my friends, it's kind of all 97 00:06:17,760 --> 00:06:22,320 Speaker 1: those things that's like so quintessentially Grammy to everyone that 98 00:06:22,440 --> 00:06:24,919 Speaker 1: just it makes you laugh or at least makes you 99 00:06:24,920 --> 00:06:33,480 Speaker 1: smile a little bit. Even before we made her this account, 100 00:06:33,480 --> 00:06:36,279 Speaker 1: all my friends knew Grammy, Like none of my friends 101 00:06:36,360 --> 00:06:39,840 Speaker 1: call her Sue. Or Susan. It's all Grammy. It's like 102 00:06:39,880 --> 00:06:43,400 Speaker 1: a nickname rather than being like my name for my grandma. 103 00:06:43,480 --> 00:06:45,600 Speaker 1: It's like, oh, hey, Grammy is Oh Grammy's gonna pick 104 00:06:45,600 --> 00:06:48,200 Speaker 1: you up. It's not like, oh, is your Grammy gonna 105 00:06:48,279 --> 00:06:51,159 Speaker 1: pick you up? She never knew I had a real name, 106 00:06:51,320 --> 00:06:53,840 Speaker 1: but until a friend the Beryl's, asked her, do you 107 00:06:53,880 --> 00:06:57,760 Speaker 1: know what Grammy's real name is? She said, Grabby. She 108 00:06:57,839 --> 00:07:00,320 Speaker 1: had one friend that really thought I was a great mother. 109 00:07:00,680 --> 00:07:04,440 Speaker 1: After my fourth grandchild was born, my husband, for her anniversary, 110 00:07:04,800 --> 00:07:07,440 Speaker 1: got be a tennis bracelet when he had a little 111 00:07:07,440 --> 00:07:11,160 Speaker 1: gold baby shoes. Attached to the bracelet at the bottom 112 00:07:11,200 --> 00:07:13,800 Speaker 1: of the shoe said each kid's day with the date 113 00:07:13,880 --> 00:07:18,040 Speaker 1: of birth. And Samantha looked at the bracelet. She said 114 00:07:18,080 --> 00:07:22,280 Speaker 1: to me, where's my name? And Avis said to it, 115 00:07:22,360 --> 00:07:25,800 Speaker 1: you're not one of Grammy's children, no child's You're not 116 00:07:25,880 --> 00:07:33,560 Speaker 1: one of Grammy's childs. That thing is so funny because 117 00:07:33,840 --> 00:07:37,480 Speaker 1: when I'm answering an email with something, I'm not good. 118 00:07:37,520 --> 00:07:41,280 Speaker 1: I don't hit the right keys, and my kids keep saying, 119 00:07:42,080 --> 00:07:46,120 Speaker 1: what are the stupid things are you sending out? You know, 120 00:07:46,280 --> 00:07:49,080 Speaker 1: we don't know what we're doing. So whatever happens happens, 121 00:07:49,120 --> 00:07:52,320 Speaker 1: and it's funny. It was adorable, that's so cute. I 122 00:07:52,440 --> 00:07:55,520 Speaker 1: think that when a child has a relationship like that 123 00:07:55,600 --> 00:08:00,000 Speaker 1: with a grandmother, it's like a gift. It really, absolutely, 124 00:08:00,240 --> 00:08:03,120 Speaker 1: it's a gift. And I tried. I tried to create 125 00:08:03,240 --> 00:08:05,520 Speaker 1: that kind of a relationship. Of course, my girls are 126 00:08:05,640 --> 00:08:08,880 Speaker 1: much much younger, so it's better, you know what, because 127 00:08:08,920 --> 00:08:11,880 Speaker 1: I feel now not that we're grandmother and grandshung with 128 00:08:12,120 --> 00:08:15,480 Speaker 1: buddies with pounds. We love to be together. They get 129 00:08:15,480 --> 00:08:18,520 Speaker 1: a kick out of me the stupid things I do. 130 00:08:18,560 --> 00:08:20,760 Speaker 1: You know, there's there's an expression that we have in 131 00:08:20,840 --> 00:08:25,640 Speaker 1: our family. It's like this no no, that usually is 132 00:08:25,720 --> 00:08:29,640 Speaker 1: involving anything that has to do with electronics, although I 133 00:08:29,680 --> 00:08:36,080 Speaker 1: tried very hard. Next up, we have part two, the 134 00:08:36,240 --> 00:08:39,599 Speaker 1: last olive, and the only thing that comes to my 135 00:08:39,800 --> 00:08:44,680 Speaker 1: mind is a marketining. How would you compare yourself to 136 00:08:44,760 --> 00:08:47,120 Speaker 1: your grandmother? What would you say is the biggest difference 137 00:08:47,160 --> 00:08:52,199 Speaker 1: between the two of you? She was cold as ice. Oh. 138 00:08:52,280 --> 00:08:54,560 Speaker 1: We used to have dinner every night together, so you know, 139 00:08:54,600 --> 00:08:57,640 Speaker 1: my mother always putting the olives, pickles, celery, carrots on 140 00:08:57,679 --> 00:09:00,920 Speaker 1: the table, and there was one of olive left when 141 00:09:01,000 --> 00:09:04,640 Speaker 1: I went to take it, she took it. My grandmother, 142 00:09:06,040 --> 00:09:07,920 Speaker 1: if there is one thing left on the table at 143 00:09:07,920 --> 00:09:10,560 Speaker 1: a restaurant, she always tells me to eat it. She's like, 144 00:09:10,640 --> 00:09:12,400 Speaker 1: you go for it. I'm not going to take the 145 00:09:12,480 --> 00:09:19,760 Speaker 1: last one. I never forgot that m after going through 146 00:09:19,960 --> 00:09:23,280 Speaker 1: the experience, have your grandmother taking the last olive? What 147 00:09:23,360 --> 00:09:25,319 Speaker 1: do you think is the most important thing to convey 148 00:09:25,840 --> 00:09:30,800 Speaker 1: to your own grandchildren? Just love them. I really never 149 00:09:30,880 --> 00:09:33,400 Speaker 1: wanted to every time I came to the house, boy 150 00:09:33,480 --> 00:09:35,839 Speaker 1: you something, and give you something, because I didn't want 151 00:09:35,840 --> 00:09:38,679 Speaker 1: to be known for that. And I know plenty of 152 00:09:38,720 --> 00:09:42,720 Speaker 1: my friends that with grandmothers, they every time they came 153 00:09:42,760 --> 00:09:45,640 Speaker 1: to the house, you think that the child was interested 154 00:09:45,679 --> 00:09:47,160 Speaker 1: in just what did you bring me? What did you 155 00:09:47,200 --> 00:09:50,720 Speaker 1: bring me? So I made sure I didn't do that. 156 00:09:50,840 --> 00:09:53,520 Speaker 1: I mean, I certainly didn't suffer from lack of gifts, 157 00:09:54,520 --> 00:09:59,920 Speaker 1: but I didn't make it an odd gooing. Uh an expectation? Right? Okay, 158 00:10:00,120 --> 00:10:03,560 Speaker 1: say yea. Not only do you do that, you finish 159 00:10:03,640 --> 00:10:09,760 Speaker 1: my sentences. You know, I have to say something about 160 00:10:09,840 --> 00:10:13,400 Speaker 1: the last alive. They used to say, if a single 161 00:10:13,480 --> 00:10:17,400 Speaker 1: girl each the last thing, she's gonna be an old maid? 162 00:10:17,480 --> 00:10:20,280 Speaker 1: Did you ever hear that? But that's never hurt. You 163 00:10:20,440 --> 00:10:22,920 Speaker 1: never heard that? Oh big, you know, I tell you 164 00:10:23,000 --> 00:10:25,320 Speaker 1: the decade between our soul and there's a lot of 165 00:10:25,400 --> 00:10:29,040 Speaker 1: things that got lost anyway. But the relationship is so cute. 166 00:10:29,120 --> 00:10:32,480 Speaker 1: It's really adorable, and it really is. And you hope 167 00:10:32,520 --> 00:10:36,320 Speaker 1: for a relationship like that with granddaughters and she and 168 00:10:36,400 --> 00:10:39,840 Speaker 1: she's right about not bring any gift every time. Don't 169 00:10:39,840 --> 00:10:41,800 Speaker 1: you know a lot of grandmothers that say, I'm going 170 00:10:41,840 --> 00:10:44,760 Speaker 1: to the grandchildren, I have to get something for No, 171 00:10:44,880 --> 00:10:47,080 Speaker 1: I do I know? Women. I have to tell you 172 00:10:47,280 --> 00:10:49,760 Speaker 1: there's nothing I could buy my grandchildren that I would 173 00:10:49,760 --> 00:10:52,880 Speaker 1: know that they want number one or that they don't have, 174 00:10:53,000 --> 00:10:56,520 Speaker 1: which is unfortunate me. Listen, I have a granddaughter who's 175 00:10:56,559 --> 00:10:58,840 Speaker 1: eleven who wants a broken leg. I think I'm gonna 176 00:10:58,840 --> 00:11:04,480 Speaker 1: buy that. No, no, you have to get on a 177 00:11:04,480 --> 00:11:09,920 Speaker 1: waiting list. Now, listen, don't go anywhere. We're gonna do 178 00:11:10,000 --> 00:11:12,600 Speaker 1: a quick commercial and I know you're gonna come right 179 00:11:12,600 --> 00:11:15,600 Speaker 1: back because we'll be looking for you. And there's nothing 180 00:11:15,760 --> 00:11:31,440 Speaker 1: like Jewish guilt. Next up is part three, Going her 181 00:11:31,520 --> 00:11:38,240 Speaker 1: Own Way? So how did you meet Poppy? A friend 182 00:11:38,240 --> 00:11:41,120 Speaker 1: of mine? When we graduated high school, went first summer 183 00:11:41,200 --> 00:11:46,840 Speaker 1: job at this company answering phones, putting in orders and 184 00:11:47,200 --> 00:11:50,160 Speaker 1: modeling the swimsuits. And she liked it so much, and 185 00:11:50,240 --> 00:11:52,199 Speaker 1: she thought her bosses were so nice that she never 186 00:11:52,280 --> 00:11:57,720 Speaker 1: went to college. So I called them and my husband's partner, 187 00:11:57,800 --> 00:11:59,679 Speaker 1: he was married, so he's the one that did the 188 00:11:59,760 --> 00:12:02,520 Speaker 1: high you ring And I had met my husband yet 189 00:12:02,800 --> 00:12:04,120 Speaker 1: you know, I would be on the spot to come 190 00:12:04,160 --> 00:12:07,079 Speaker 1: in the following day his part Yeah, she had a 191 00:12:07,200 --> 00:12:11,080 Speaker 1: rocking bod. And at that center clock, this dude struts 192 00:12:11,160 --> 00:12:15,400 Speaker 1: in and he starts singing A foggy day in London Town. 193 00:12:15,480 --> 00:12:18,080 Speaker 1: I said to myself, who is this? And there he was. 194 00:12:20,559 --> 00:12:22,400 Speaker 1: Whenever I get to say, like, oh my grandma, Yeah 195 00:12:22,520 --> 00:12:24,240 Speaker 1: she was a bathing suit model. For like a little 196 00:12:24,240 --> 00:12:27,320 Speaker 1: bit of time, we're like, she's a bathing suit model, 197 00:12:27,520 --> 00:12:29,600 Speaker 1: I was like, yes, model bathing suits my grandpa made 198 00:12:29,640 --> 00:12:32,080 Speaker 1: on then. I mean, who knew he'd be my future 199 00:12:32,120 --> 00:12:34,520 Speaker 1: huts But I used to stay there because I had 200 00:12:34,520 --> 00:12:36,560 Speaker 1: a crush on him, and I would take a later 201 00:12:36,679 --> 00:12:39,880 Speaker 1: training back to Lord Beach on Friday afternoon so I 202 00:12:39,880 --> 00:12:42,640 Speaker 1: could stay another twenty minutes to the office with him. 203 00:12:42,760 --> 00:12:46,200 Speaker 1: One night, I stayed later to model some suits for them, 204 00:12:47,040 --> 00:12:50,680 Speaker 1: and then he took me for dinner. On the way out, 205 00:12:50,720 --> 00:12:55,079 Speaker 1: I broke my heel of my shoe and he gave me, 206 00:12:55,120 --> 00:12:58,280 Speaker 1: I think thirty dollars, so he said, his money, and 207 00:12:58,320 --> 00:13:00,120 Speaker 1: go buy a pair of shoes because she's coming to 208 00:13:00,160 --> 00:13:02,600 Speaker 1: work tomorrow. You need a pair of shoes. I had 209 00:13:02,600 --> 00:13:08,280 Speaker 1: to think not to vomit. I was so nervous. He 210 00:13:08,440 --> 00:13:13,640 Speaker 1: was a great combination of niceness and thoughtfulness and its sexy. 211 00:13:13,679 --> 00:13:15,920 Speaker 1: It was a great combination. You know, it's like salt 212 00:13:15,960 --> 00:13:19,240 Speaker 1: but pepper. You know, it worked very well together. I 213 00:13:19,280 --> 00:13:22,040 Speaker 1: felt that it was something real, but I didn't know 214 00:13:22,080 --> 00:13:25,840 Speaker 1: what real really was. I was trying to fight it. 215 00:13:26,600 --> 00:13:28,760 Speaker 1: They was thirteen a half years older than I was 216 00:13:28,800 --> 00:13:31,080 Speaker 1: at nineteen, a man of thirty two and a half. 217 00:13:31,120 --> 00:13:33,560 Speaker 1: I made my friends thought I was going out with 218 00:13:33,600 --> 00:13:37,480 Speaker 1: my father. Yeah, she was nineteen, I mean to be exact, 219 00:13:37,520 --> 00:13:41,679 Speaker 1: I was eighteen really when I met him, and he 220 00:13:41,760 --> 00:13:44,439 Speaker 1: was in the garb and Center, and that it wasn't 221 00:13:44,440 --> 00:13:47,200 Speaker 1: a distinguished career like being a doctor a lawyer. You know, 222 00:13:47,880 --> 00:13:51,679 Speaker 1: that's how people thought. You know. I was crazy about him, 223 00:13:51,679 --> 00:13:54,800 Speaker 1: and his time went by, I was even more so, 224 00:13:55,240 --> 00:13:57,920 Speaker 1: but I felt that there was no future there. I mean, 225 00:13:58,240 --> 00:14:01,000 Speaker 1: I can't marry him. Makes that he's not marriage material 226 00:14:01,120 --> 00:14:05,360 Speaker 1: for me. So what changed your mind then about Poppy 227 00:14:05,400 --> 00:14:10,480 Speaker 1: being marriage material? I was going with him over two years, 228 00:14:10,960 --> 00:14:14,280 Speaker 1: and I saw that I didn't like anybody else. Finally, 229 00:14:14,440 --> 00:14:18,880 Speaker 1: my mother said to me that summer looks susan either ship. 230 00:14:18,920 --> 00:14:21,560 Speaker 1: We'll get up the pot. That's it. You can't keep 231 00:14:21,600 --> 00:14:25,120 Speaker 1: going like this. You know, there wasn't the pill they got. 232 00:14:25,160 --> 00:14:27,280 Speaker 1: My mother was scared at death. I would be coome pregnant. 233 00:14:27,280 --> 00:14:31,680 Speaker 1: You know, you got married to January before your college graduation, 234 00:14:31,800 --> 00:14:33,960 Speaker 1: and didn't your father make you get your maiden name 235 00:14:34,040 --> 00:14:37,120 Speaker 1: on your diploma right because he thought the marriagement at last. 236 00:14:37,560 --> 00:14:39,600 Speaker 1: So you never know, you know, And we had a 237 00:14:39,720 --> 00:14:46,680 Speaker 1: very long, loving marriage, so you never can tell. Oh, 238 00:14:46,800 --> 00:14:49,880 Speaker 1: he found like a really nice guy. And look how 239 00:14:49,960 --> 00:14:52,600 Speaker 1: generous he was. He gave him money for para shoes 240 00:14:53,040 --> 00:14:55,640 Speaker 1: in those years of para shues for thirty dollars had 241 00:14:55,640 --> 00:15:00,840 Speaker 1: to be Jimmy Choo, something really of I wasn't jump 242 00:15:00,960 --> 00:15:03,400 Speaker 1: from a a s BEC. I don't know a few 243 00:15:03,440 --> 00:15:06,720 Speaker 1: people remember that. God, I remember a s Bec. It 244 00:15:06,880 --> 00:15:10,640 Speaker 1: was a shoe store chain and it was modern, comfortable shoes, 245 00:15:11,000 --> 00:15:13,360 Speaker 1: but at thirty dollars, my god, you would have brought 246 00:15:13,400 --> 00:15:16,760 Speaker 1: three pair and they expect So he was a generous guy. 247 00:15:16,880 --> 00:15:21,960 Speaker 1: I say, these two Ava and Grahammy I'm enjoying this relationship. 248 00:15:22,240 --> 00:15:24,840 Speaker 1: And the grandmother is a funny lady. She's a lot 249 00:15:24,880 --> 00:15:27,560 Speaker 1: of fun. She's a oh, I I haven't expression who 250 00:15:27,840 --> 00:15:31,480 Speaker 1: you know what? Who did? She's a yeah, okay, I 251 00:15:31,520 --> 00:15:33,680 Speaker 1: don't know. If you need a few young girls know what? 252 00:15:33,840 --> 00:15:36,240 Speaker 1: Who did? It's like I still say that read it 253 00:15:36,840 --> 00:15:42,960 Speaker 1: really yeah, okay, okay, Rida Part four us coming up. 254 00:15:43,400 --> 00:15:46,680 Speaker 1: I see that it says making your own money. This 255 00:15:46,760 --> 00:15:49,080 Speaker 1: is something all of them have to learn how to do. 256 00:15:50,720 --> 00:15:54,160 Speaker 1: When I got married, I still was in college and 257 00:15:54,560 --> 00:15:58,240 Speaker 1: I was a speech in audiology major, and I really 258 00:15:58,320 --> 00:16:00,480 Speaker 1: liked it that they gave us patience to take on 259 00:16:00,560 --> 00:16:03,920 Speaker 1: the outside. We visited certain people at hospitals. Do ever 260 00:16:03,960 --> 00:16:07,440 Speaker 1: see the movie Maudy with Ernest Borgnard. Well, his mother 261 00:16:07,520 --> 00:16:10,160 Speaker 1: had a stroke and she was in Safe Vincent's hospital 262 00:16:10,200 --> 00:16:12,640 Speaker 1: in the city, and she was one of my patients 263 00:16:12,680 --> 00:16:14,760 Speaker 1: that I had to go see. What's so we and 264 00:16:15,080 --> 00:16:19,240 Speaker 1: I was offered a job at Rusk Institute and My 265 00:16:19,360 --> 00:16:22,000 Speaker 1: husband did not want me to take the job because 266 00:16:22,040 --> 00:16:24,040 Speaker 1: he was afraid I'd fall in love with a doctor. 267 00:16:25,280 --> 00:16:28,080 Speaker 1: And he kept saying that to me, and and it 268 00:16:28,160 --> 00:16:30,120 Speaker 1: was close to where we lived, and I really I 269 00:16:30,720 --> 00:16:33,640 Speaker 1: studied hard and I really wanted to work at it. 270 00:16:33,880 --> 00:16:35,560 Speaker 1: I said, I fell in love with you. Why would 271 00:16:35,560 --> 00:16:37,320 Speaker 1: I fall in love with the doctor. He says, well, 272 00:16:37,360 --> 00:16:39,720 Speaker 1: you've got to have a baby, sued, And that's how 273 00:16:39,760 --> 00:16:41,440 Speaker 1: we thought. So I didn't say I'd have a baby 274 00:16:41,600 --> 00:16:44,560 Speaker 1: worked too, you know. So that was the end of 275 00:16:44,560 --> 00:16:47,600 Speaker 1: my profession. I feel like it's definitely worth noting that 276 00:16:48,240 --> 00:16:51,760 Speaker 1: all of the women in our family value education very highly. 277 00:16:52,280 --> 00:16:55,560 Speaker 1: I'm the fourth generation to be going to college woman, 278 00:16:56,520 --> 00:16:59,160 Speaker 1: and so I mean it's a pretty big deal. Like 279 00:16:59,760 --> 00:17:04,080 Speaker 1: it's more about having the passion for learning. Grammy, you'll 280 00:17:04,080 --> 00:17:06,400 Speaker 1: call me even at the beginning of every semester. What 281 00:17:06,440 --> 00:17:08,879 Speaker 1: books are you reading in your classes? Like, I'm an 282 00:17:08,880 --> 00:17:11,199 Speaker 1: English major, so it's all this stuff. It's a lot 283 00:17:11,280 --> 00:17:14,720 Speaker 1: of feminist literature that I've been reading recently. It wanted 284 00:17:14,800 --> 00:17:18,119 Speaker 1: us something I really, uh, black the other side of 285 00:17:18,160 --> 00:17:20,560 Speaker 1: the fence with this by day. What do you mean 286 00:17:20,560 --> 00:17:23,320 Speaker 1: you're on the other side of the fence were already. 287 00:17:23,400 --> 00:17:26,240 Speaker 1: So what does that mean? I don't know. I mean 288 00:17:26,280 --> 00:17:30,720 Speaker 1: I believe in equal pay. Uh. My nephew graduated Harvard 289 00:17:31,000 --> 00:17:35,000 Speaker 1: Law School about Ted's years ago, and more than half 290 00:17:35,000 --> 00:17:39,399 Speaker 1: of those law students were wipid. Right really made me 291 00:17:39,440 --> 00:17:42,280 Speaker 1: feel good. It really wore my heart. Yeah, I think 292 00:17:42,280 --> 00:17:45,360 Speaker 1: that Grammy as a woman, I think she's definitely more 293 00:17:45,400 --> 00:17:49,880 Speaker 1: progressive than others in terms of like feminism. I don't 294 00:17:49,880 --> 00:17:52,840 Speaker 1: think she would call herself necessarily a feminist, but I 295 00:17:52,880 --> 00:17:56,679 Speaker 1: think that Grammy has always been someone to champion women 296 00:17:56,760 --> 00:17:59,280 Speaker 1: doing what they want, not relying on a husband or 297 00:17:59,280 --> 00:18:03,199 Speaker 1: a boyfriend to fulfill all of your needs. And I 298 00:18:03,200 --> 00:18:05,240 Speaker 1: mean it was very deeply ingrained in my mom that 299 00:18:05,320 --> 00:18:08,000 Speaker 1: you work and you make your own money. And now 300 00:18:08,040 --> 00:18:10,600 Speaker 1: I'm making a little bit of my own money, and 301 00:18:10,640 --> 00:18:15,600 Speaker 1: it feels really good. Having money of your own gives 302 00:18:15,600 --> 00:18:18,760 Speaker 1: you a sense of independence. You know. That reminds me 303 00:18:18,880 --> 00:18:21,639 Speaker 1: of a story when I graduated from college and I 304 00:18:21,680 --> 00:18:24,520 Speaker 1: got my first job teaching. My mother said to me, 305 00:18:25,240 --> 00:18:29,160 Speaker 1: You're gonna have to pay rent now. And I was horrified, 306 00:18:30,080 --> 00:18:32,240 Speaker 1: I'm going to live at home with you and Daddy 307 00:18:32,280 --> 00:18:35,040 Speaker 1: and I have to pay rent. My mother said, it's 308 00:18:35,040 --> 00:18:39,080 Speaker 1: only fair you have to pay rent. And about a 309 00:18:39,119 --> 00:18:41,880 Speaker 1: week before I got married, my mother came to me 310 00:18:42,400 --> 00:18:46,320 Speaker 1: with an envelope and she said, this is yours, and 311 00:18:46,359 --> 00:18:48,800 Speaker 1: I opened it up and there was a tremendous check 312 00:18:48,840 --> 00:18:51,920 Speaker 1: in there. Then all the rent you pay, she says, 313 00:18:51,920 --> 00:18:54,040 Speaker 1: I'm your mother, I know you, and I know where 314 00:18:54,040 --> 00:18:57,240 Speaker 1: that money would have god, And we had a very 315 00:18:57,359 --> 00:19:03,640 Speaker 1: nice little nest egg from that money for one one 316 00:19:04,080 --> 00:19:07,359 Speaker 1: to do three three? What do I think? I'm believe 317 00:19:07,359 --> 00:19:11,720 Speaker 1: we're gonna say time to go commercial, commercial and we'll 318 00:19:11,760 --> 00:19:15,840 Speaker 1: be right back. We can never sink I talked too fast. No, 319 00:19:16,040 --> 00:19:22,760 Speaker 1: you were behind me? Read are you still there? Oh? Yeah? 320 00:19:23,119 --> 00:19:28,200 Speaker 1: Part five is coming up. Grammy's Lessons something everyone should 321 00:19:28,200 --> 00:19:35,040 Speaker 1: adhere to. Grammy. What's the difference between being a mother 322 00:19:35,119 --> 00:19:37,760 Speaker 1: and a grandmother? For you? I don't have to worry 323 00:19:37,760 --> 00:19:39,959 Speaker 1: every night. Did you do your homework? What's your homework? 324 00:19:39,960 --> 00:19:42,600 Speaker 1: Where is your homework? What's this? To pick up your clothes? 325 00:19:42,640 --> 00:19:45,120 Speaker 1: Put back your clothes? Did you go to the bathroom today? 326 00:19:45,160 --> 00:19:47,240 Speaker 1: I was always a big maxature. My kids went to 327 00:19:47,320 --> 00:19:49,760 Speaker 1: the bathroom with that. You still do do that with me, 328 00:19:50,200 --> 00:19:53,439 Speaker 1: By the way, Just to make that clear, that's not 329 00:19:53,480 --> 00:19:57,680 Speaker 1: where the mother grandmother line is. It's not really worrying 330 00:19:57,880 --> 00:20:01,639 Speaker 1: day by day. It's just it's like eating ice cream 331 00:20:01,680 --> 00:20:08,280 Speaker 1: every day without having to eat the spinach. It's pure joy. 332 00:20:10,000 --> 00:20:12,360 Speaker 1: When I was growing up, she was always with me, 333 00:20:12,600 --> 00:20:14,560 Speaker 1: like it was always she would pick me up from school, 334 00:20:14,760 --> 00:20:16,600 Speaker 1: or she would take me somewhere and we would go 335 00:20:16,600 --> 00:20:19,760 Speaker 1: to chuck e cheeses together or eat like ice cream 336 00:20:19,800 --> 00:20:24,000 Speaker 1: sundays in bed. Eventually I was like, oh, this isn't normal. 337 00:20:24,800 --> 00:20:26,959 Speaker 1: What was like? Oh yeah, like I saw Grammy today, 338 00:20:26,960 --> 00:20:29,200 Speaker 1: like she brought me to a cooking class or something, 339 00:20:29,240 --> 00:20:31,680 Speaker 1: And people like, oh yeah, Like I see my grandparents 340 00:20:31,760 --> 00:20:35,399 Speaker 1: like once a year or like once every couple of months. 341 00:20:35,440 --> 00:20:38,480 Speaker 1: And I still don't know many kids whose grandparents are 342 00:20:38,560 --> 00:20:41,719 Speaker 1: in there every day live. You know. I call her 343 00:20:41,800 --> 00:20:44,280 Speaker 1: most of the time, but she does call me occasionally, 344 00:20:44,760 --> 00:20:47,000 Speaker 1: And when I get those phone calls, it's like a 345 00:20:47,080 --> 00:20:50,480 Speaker 1: girl waiting for a boyfriend that she's been dying for 346 00:20:50,840 --> 00:20:53,920 Speaker 1: him to call her, slacked by hot skips beats when 347 00:20:53,960 --> 00:20:57,240 Speaker 1: she calls me. By the way, I passed a chuck 348 00:20:57,280 --> 00:21:00,000 Speaker 1: e cheese today. You did is a big chucky cheese. 349 00:21:00,040 --> 00:21:03,199 Speaker 1: I swear to God, we never ate there. I just 350 00:21:03,240 --> 00:21:05,040 Speaker 1: want to make that very clear that we never ate 351 00:21:05,080 --> 00:21:07,840 Speaker 1: at check e Cheeses. We just played the games. So 352 00:21:07,880 --> 00:21:09,400 Speaker 1: we would go when I was little, and we would 353 00:21:09,480 --> 00:21:13,400 Speaker 1: rack up tickets and we would just play like hours 354 00:21:13,440 --> 00:21:16,400 Speaker 1: of ski ball and like hours of games in order 355 00:21:16,440 --> 00:21:18,560 Speaker 1: to rack up as many points as we could. And 356 00:21:18,640 --> 00:21:20,920 Speaker 1: we used to walk past the machines at kids left 357 00:21:20,920 --> 00:21:23,960 Speaker 1: and the tickets would be hanging out. I got to 358 00:21:24,000 --> 00:21:27,200 Speaker 1: take them. We've got a couple of hundred tickets every day, 359 00:21:27,359 --> 00:21:29,520 Speaker 1: and so then we would collect them and how many 360 00:21:29,520 --> 00:21:33,840 Speaker 1: tickets did we end up getting or something like that. Yeah, grammy, 361 00:21:33,840 --> 00:21:36,520 Speaker 1: do you still have the tickets? Yes, I do when 362 00:21:36,520 --> 00:21:39,040 Speaker 1: I diecause they're in the desk of the left hip drawer. 363 00:21:39,320 --> 00:21:41,360 Speaker 1: All right, thank you, not dad, I'll buy a chuck 364 00:21:41,359 --> 00:21:48,960 Speaker 1: e cheese and name it Sue's Sue's plays. That's the 365 00:21:49,040 --> 00:21:53,639 Speaker 1: cutest thing. I love that relationship. And as lucky and 366 00:21:53,960 --> 00:21:57,080 Speaker 1: the grandmother was, the grand daughter is twice as lucky 367 00:21:57,119 --> 00:22:00,159 Speaker 1: to have as a grandmother. I have to say. I 368 00:22:00,280 --> 00:22:04,119 Speaker 1: once said to my husband, I envy my grandchildren the 369 00:22:04,200 --> 00:22:09,120 Speaker 1: relationship that we have with them, because I never had 370 00:22:09,160 --> 00:22:12,439 Speaker 1: that with a grandparents. He he had, he had two 371 00:22:12,560 --> 00:22:16,240 Speaker 1: very doting grandmothers. His grandmother came to stay with us 372 00:22:16,280 --> 00:22:18,000 Speaker 1: for a week because she wanted to teach me how 373 00:22:18,040 --> 00:22:21,080 Speaker 1: to cook. They were terrible cooks in that family. And 374 00:22:21,200 --> 00:22:26,000 Speaker 1: she said to me, My murther always told me, before 375 00:22:26,080 --> 00:22:30,680 Speaker 1: the husband comes home, vosh your face, put on a 376 00:22:30,880 --> 00:22:34,600 Speaker 1: clean vest, and glean him at the dore me that kiss. 377 00:22:35,320 --> 00:22:37,160 Speaker 1: I only greeted him at the door with a kiss, 378 00:22:37,200 --> 00:22:44,520 Speaker 1: but I never you know, watch me, okay, were to 379 00:22:44,640 --> 00:22:49,840 Speaker 1: get ready. This is a part six learning to slow 380 00:22:50,320 --> 00:22:55,399 Speaker 1: down and smell the roses because you're mad here forem 381 00:22:55,400 --> 00:23:00,479 Speaker 1: a sweetheart. Do you think that the women in my 382 00:23:00,520 --> 00:23:03,600 Speaker 1: generation are missing out on anything? I don't think they 383 00:23:03,600 --> 00:23:06,560 Speaker 1: have time to step back and smell the flowers like 384 00:23:06,640 --> 00:23:09,520 Speaker 1: we did. I think life is much more difficult today. 385 00:23:09,840 --> 00:23:12,000 Speaker 1: The women today wanted all of the law that have 386 00:23:12,119 --> 00:23:14,520 Speaker 1: to have more than what we had because they need to. 387 00:23:15,000 --> 00:23:17,480 Speaker 1: It comes to the family, and there's a lot of 388 00:23:17,520 --> 00:23:21,200 Speaker 1: stress out there, really is. Yeah, I mean I agree 389 00:23:21,200 --> 00:23:24,560 Speaker 1: with that. I think that the grammy never she always 390 00:23:24,560 --> 00:23:27,560 Speaker 1: said that, like working seemed like such a fun kind 391 00:23:27,560 --> 00:23:30,800 Speaker 1: of thing to do, and I think now that I'm working, 392 00:23:30,840 --> 00:23:33,160 Speaker 1: I'm trying to step back at least a little bit 393 00:23:33,160 --> 00:23:37,439 Speaker 1: more and realize that, like everything isn't moving so quickly, 394 00:23:37,760 --> 00:23:40,040 Speaker 1: Like I'm twenty two now, and it's like, how am 395 00:23:40,040 --> 00:23:42,879 Speaker 1: I twenty two? And so I'm trying to just like 396 00:23:43,359 --> 00:23:45,639 Speaker 1: slow down a little bit and smell the roses for 397 00:23:45,760 --> 00:23:48,600 Speaker 1: like at least a second, you know. I think, though, 398 00:23:49,000 --> 00:23:52,920 Speaker 1: it's some way that raising my children and being there 399 00:23:53,119 --> 00:23:58,600 Speaker 1: and participating in their activities was like my career. Yeah, 400 00:23:58,680 --> 00:24:00,159 Speaker 1: and then she got to do it double with me, 401 00:24:00,680 --> 00:24:05,440 Speaker 1: but only the fun parts. Well, I fired you very smart, 402 00:24:06,119 --> 00:24:09,560 Speaker 1: and I think you have very good common sense, and 403 00:24:10,320 --> 00:24:14,120 Speaker 1: I think you're a fabulous person thinks. So I could 404 00:24:14,119 --> 00:24:17,520 Speaker 1: ask you about style, and I could ask you about 405 00:24:17,880 --> 00:24:23,320 Speaker 1: I really don't talk about Kaska Dustyevsky. We could. We have, 406 00:24:23,560 --> 00:24:27,199 Speaker 1: you know, an odgoing relationship. But we talked about a 407 00:24:27,240 --> 00:24:30,760 Speaker 1: lot of things, and I just I just enjoy you 408 00:24:30,840 --> 00:24:40,560 Speaker 1: aver fabulous, beyond fabulous. It's grammy. I know we're on 409 00:24:40,640 --> 00:24:43,840 Speaker 1: the same page. He said. He loves all that we do. 410 00:24:44,280 --> 00:24:48,320 Speaker 1: I have five grandchildren. I love five grandchildren. But there's 411 00:24:48,359 --> 00:24:52,199 Speaker 1: always one that you have a little special relationship with. 412 00:24:52,560 --> 00:24:55,280 Speaker 1: It's a friend, it's it's a loved one. It's not 413 00:24:56,000 --> 00:25:00,600 Speaker 1: my mother's mother or my father's mother. It's my grandmother, 414 00:25:00,760 --> 00:25:10,960 Speaker 1: my friend, my buddy, my confidant. Call Your Grandmother is 415 00:25:11,000 --> 00:25:15,480 Speaker 1: a production of I Heart Radio and SUPERB Entertainment. The 416 00:25:15,560 --> 00:25:18,760 Speaker 1: hosts of the show are me Rida Kay and me 417 00:25:19,200 --> 00:25:25,359 Speaker 1: Alan Bernstein. Grotsky. Created by Meryl Poster, produced and directed 418 00:25:25,359 --> 00:25:32,320 Speaker 1: by Anasta, with producer Abu Zafar, An associate producer Emily Marinoff, 419 00:25:33,080 --> 00:25:38,800 Speaker 1: managing producer Lizzy Hoffman, and executive producers are Meryl Poster, 420 00:25:39,480 --> 00:25:46,800 Speaker 1: Nikki e Tor and Mandes and Mangeshti Okay, let me 421 00:25:46,840 --> 00:25:52,320 Speaker 1: start again, al Hati Hatika, Door Music and master by 422 00:25:52,320 --> 00:26:00,520 Speaker 1: Hamilton Lighthouser and Anasta. Would you expect your grandmother and 423 00:26:00,640 --> 00:26:10,040 Speaker 1: ninety to be on the podcast noway h