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Speaker 1: The Nick Glaser Podcasts. Nicky, Hello here I am. It's

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Speaker 1: a Nicki Glaser podcast. Welcome to the show. It's Wednesday.

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Speaker 1: I am in St. Louis with Andrew Cullen. I still

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Speaker 1: have sunglasses on because my brutal laser facial yesterday left

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Speaker 1: me looking um the way I looked when I used

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Speaker 1: the vibrator on my face and I got My eyes

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Speaker 1: look like little like lion's eyes. They look tiny, like

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Speaker 1: the skin around them makes them look swollen, and I

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Speaker 1: just can't handle it. No, yeah, but you can see

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Speaker 1: off camera, but I'm not good. I mean, that would

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Speaker 1: defeat the purpose people because people will take that still

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Speaker 1: image like this is who she is, and they'll uploaded

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Speaker 1: as my IMDb pick, you know, Like I just can't

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Speaker 1: have that. So instead, I'm wearing a pair of glasses

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Speaker 1: that Paris Hilton sent me. But she sent me a

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Speaker 1: gigantic case of sun glasses. I'm not kidding you. This

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Speaker 1: box is half the size of a room. And I

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Speaker 1: was so annoyed because I'm like, what is this big thing?

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Speaker 1: And then you open it up and it is a case.

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Speaker 1: It's a display case that is as big as this

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Speaker 1: table that you open up and inside are six pairs

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Speaker 1: of glasses in like foam. Like it's like a case

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Speaker 1: that you would send a Macy's to be like, here's

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Speaker 1: how to display this. I mean, a giant waste of materials,

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Speaker 1: But I'm very grateful for the class. Look like a

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Speaker 1: cocaine DJ in Miami. Yeah, I feel it allows me

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Speaker 1: to wear things that I wouldn't normally wear but really

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Speaker 1: want to wear because Paris said it was okay and

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Speaker 1: she sent it to me, and I would be a

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Speaker 1: bad friend to not wear it. Yeah, it is. It

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Speaker 1: is interesting when you get it as a gift, you

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Speaker 1: can wear whatever the fun you want. It's a gift.

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Speaker 1: I have to I feel bad for that person. My

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Speaker 1: nana is going to be so disappointed that I don't

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Speaker 1: wear these nipple clamps. Yeah, I get it. Speaking of nipples.

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Speaker 1: Um Well, and I were watching the Noah alerted me

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Speaker 1: that Taylor Switch was going I've on n y US

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Speaker 1: commencement speech and that they were broadcasting it on YouTube live.

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Speaker 1: And I didn't even know and Noah told me, so

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Speaker 1: I go on live and Noah made the hilarious joke

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Speaker 1: from yesterday's podcast Am Drip that you know Taylor swift

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Speaker 1: has like bright red lips, and Noah just said to me,

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Speaker 1: it's like, I wonder, I guess her her nipples are

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Speaker 1: cherry red. Good joke thinking about what her nipples were.

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Speaker 1: And I just stopped because that is not okay and

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Speaker 1: she does not want that. And but Noe and I

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Speaker 1: really enjoyed the commences. Noah, as someone who is not

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Speaker 1: a swifty what, I'm so glad that you are. What

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Speaker 1: a good friend you are to give something. No just

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Speaker 1: not even alert me to watch it with me too,

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Speaker 1: like she watched it. She hasn't interest in things that

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Speaker 1: not only her friend but obviously her the host of

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Speaker 1: the show that she produces as an interest in. And

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Speaker 1: like tries to this is what I want in every

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Speaker 1: one of my friends, all my partners, romantic partner, to

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Speaker 1: see the world through my eyes, to try to give

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Speaker 1: things a chance that you might not necessarily like to

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Speaker 1: understand their friend Nicki. And it really meant a lot

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Speaker 1: to me. How long was the speech? Minutes? Yeah, like

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Speaker 1: minutes And how is it okay? I felt like this

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Speaker 1: is speaking to us because it's the things that we

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Speaker 1: talk about. She had a really great portion on cringe

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Speaker 1: on the word on our YouTube or on our instant

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Speaker 1: for the show because she did something cringe. She did

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Speaker 1: a kid thing and then I, yes, it was a

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Speaker 1: good joke, but I was like okay. And then right

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Speaker 1: after that she was like, you know, one of her

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Speaker 1: lessons was live with the cringe. Just know that no

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Speaker 1: matter what you do, you can't fight it. You will

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Speaker 1: look back on your life and cringe. And cringe is

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Speaker 1: just because the new cringe is what the hashtag I

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Speaker 1: put on our on the post, but it was need that.

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Speaker 1: That's how good she is. She says something ker not

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Speaker 1: knowing that it's but then she retroactively then gives gives

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Speaker 1: an excuse for being cur because she says, I'm gonna

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Speaker 1: keep being She said in two thousand and twelve, I

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Speaker 1: dressed like a nineteen fifties housewife for some reason. It

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Speaker 1: is funny at the time, you think I'm fucking pulling

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Speaker 1: this off. This is my new look. I've done this

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Speaker 1: fifty million times. But at what point do you realize

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Speaker 1: it's cringe? And why does it suddenly become cringe because

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Speaker 1: because of the times or because of you, Cringe is

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Speaker 1: curt don't like I had a piphany listening to it.

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Speaker 1: Like anytime someone goes that's so cringe, like my Bob

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Speaker 1: Saget song. A lot of people said it was cringe,

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Speaker 1: Like anything that you can look at that through your life,

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Speaker 1: that's cringe. It is the same as ker you were

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Speaker 1: trying to be something so that other people would think

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Speaker 1: something of you, You would not do it in a vacuum.

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Speaker 1: I I say that I would have saying that Bob

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Speaker 1: Saget song in a vacum. You don't know the things

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Speaker 1: I do in a vacuum about Bob Saget that are

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Speaker 1: not for anyone but me and my spiritual connection to

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Speaker 1: the past, you know, people who have passed. So it's like,

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Speaker 1: but there are But why put it out there then? Um,

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Speaker 1: I don't know, to help other people process what they're

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Speaker 1: going through and to make it okay to be a

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Speaker 1: little bit sacharin and ridiculous. But yeah, but what did

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Speaker 1: you get from what she was saying about it? I

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Speaker 1: got from the like, stop trying to fight, just let

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Speaker 1: it happen, and that people are always going to try

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Speaker 1: to bring you down. And and my favorite point was

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Speaker 1: which she had the same thing that um Conan had

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Speaker 1: said in his um you know, his his last monologue

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Speaker 1: during the tonight show when he left because Jay Letto

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Speaker 1: came back to take back a job that he had

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Speaker 1: already given Conan so um he played. He was a

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Speaker 1: what's that word that we can't say anymore? You know

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Speaker 1: what I'm talking about? So um let a Letto giver.

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Speaker 1: So yeah, I count and so I gave you this

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Speaker 1: and you just didn't in a handle it whill and

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Speaker 1: I'm not ready to disco die with my cars. That's good,

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Speaker 1: thanks buddy. So Conan said, don't do don't be cynical,

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Speaker 1: and that's what she kind of said. She was like,

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Speaker 1: one thing that is I think she was on the

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Speaker 1: heels of the cringe things. She said, one thing that

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Speaker 1: is often cringe is enthusiasm. Don't work like I She's like,

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Speaker 1: I love enthusiasm. And then Noah, that reminded me of

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Speaker 1: a thing you had said prior when we were when

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Speaker 1: we first tuned in, she was about to come on

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Speaker 1: stage and you were like, oh my god, this chat

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Speaker 1: is insane. People going like Taylor, Taylor, Taylor, OMG. And

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Speaker 1: you know, it was hard to type all those things

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Speaker 1: while I was talking to you, but I did um

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Speaker 1: shoot off a fair amount of mommy, mommy is. But

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Speaker 1: that's why Swifties and you go. I can't believe this fandom.

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Speaker 1: I wish I loved something that much. I wish I

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Speaker 1: had that much fervor for you know, you gave an

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Speaker 1: example of your Carcass concert this weekend. Yeah, I was

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Speaker 1: in line to buy March. I really wanted to buy

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Speaker 1: a hat in the T shirt and the guy in

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Speaker 1: front of me was such a huge fan. He had

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Speaker 1: bought this like limited edition box set a vinyl, a

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Speaker 1: T shirt and a hat, and I saw how much

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Speaker 1: it rang up. It rang up for a hundred and

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Speaker 1: ninety dollars, and he was just like admiring it and

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Speaker 1: like so happy and like hugging it, and I just

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Speaker 1: was like so jealous of how enthusiast. And then I

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Speaker 1: saw him like all the way in the front row,

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Speaker 1: just like going crazy and being and I just felt

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Speaker 1: so like jaded, and I just was like, you know,

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Speaker 1: I miss being I don't think i've ever been. Actually

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Speaker 1: I was. I was a fan of guns and roses

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Speaker 1: that big, and then it squashed and I was just

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Speaker 1: like I just missed being a fan of something so deeply. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: it's and it's enthusiasm, and it's like Taylor encourages uh

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Speaker 1: this crazy enthusiasm, and like, ever does she haveing in

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Speaker 1: of other people? Uh? Yeah, I mean like she's honored

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Speaker 1: people at the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, Like, uh,

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Speaker 1: what's her name, Carly? Uh no, Carly Simon. Um, she's

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Speaker 1: you know, I think Joni Mitchell. Um. She is a Uh.

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Speaker 1: There's been tons of examples of her, especially when she

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Speaker 1: was doing to and she would bring people out. She

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Speaker 1: was so reverential and like, but like, have you ever

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Speaker 1: seen her waring st Yeah, she wore the ninet shirt

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Speaker 1: or shirt when she was dating a guy allegedly for

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Speaker 1: the band, So she's she's she definitely would wear people's

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Speaker 1: T shirts. But um no, I just feel like sometimes,

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Speaker 1: Tim McGraw, we could all be so self involved to

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Speaker 1: to to release ourselves to being fans of things outside ourselves.

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Speaker 1: And that's why I asked a question, because like, I

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Speaker 1: have T like, I like sports, I love sports. I've

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Speaker 1: never I don't. I think I've worn like a jersey

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Speaker 1: twice in my life, and really like we're doing maybe

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Speaker 1: not a jersey, but like what about just a shirt

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Speaker 1: with the logo on it? I know, I I just

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Speaker 1: I like the team. I just have never been like, hey,

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Speaker 1: we're doing great this year. I've never been. And I

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Speaker 1: don't know if it's a I think I do it

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Speaker 1: to attract annoying that that care about it too. Yeah. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: Like that's what I like is when girls are like,

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Speaker 1: like your shirt and then I'm like, yes, you get it,

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Speaker 1: you like And I love when I see other girls

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Speaker 1: with swifty stuff because I'm just like they we are.

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Speaker 1: It's almost like we came from the same hometown or

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Speaker 1: we went to the same high school. It's like that

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Speaker 1: kind of like kinship. That's why. And I wear it

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Speaker 1: to be like because I know so many people think

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Speaker 1: Taylor Swift is like they just have pigeonholed her as

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Speaker 1: like this pop artist that is talks about boys, and

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Speaker 1: maybe if I am wearing something of hers, not ironically,

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Speaker 1: they might give her a shot and be like, Okay,

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Speaker 1: that woman has is a Taylor Swift fans she seems cool. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: But although sometimes I think that I probably just add

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Speaker 1: to the Wow look at that crazy lady with crocs

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Speaker 1: and two dogs and a dog's an empty dog sling

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Speaker 1: and um yeah, yeah, I was going to check out

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Speaker 1: swift Starbucks Arners for herself. I always look like I'm

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Speaker 1: going to a meeting where I'm like reading a bunch

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Speaker 1: of other people, but it's just me to pack up

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Speaker 1: for the day so I don't have to keep going

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Speaker 1: back to that Starbucks. And they go, you have a problem,

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Speaker 1: I go, no, I'm going to a meeting where everyone

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Speaker 1: wants the same drink as me. Oh my god, might

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Speaker 1: encourage your your addictions, which is nice because everyone's addicting. No,

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Speaker 1: I mean, like that's what I used to do. Like

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Speaker 1: people who have food addictions will totally relate to this

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Speaker 1: of like you want I want the same thing for

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Speaker 1: every meal, and you get embarrassed. I've talked about this before.

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Speaker 1: You get embarrassed going back to the same place, even

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Speaker 1: if you're addicted to cigarettes or something, and you're like, oh,

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Speaker 1: we got already bought a pack there today, and the

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Speaker 1: same guy it's gonna still be working there later. He's

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Speaker 1: gonna know that I have a problem. Like, how could

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Speaker 1: I've already gone. I did this with m I did

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Speaker 1: this with caffeine, I've done this with fro yo. I

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Speaker 1: would wait, I would find either another place that sold

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Speaker 1: it and drive across town so I wouldn't have to

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Speaker 1: see that person again because it's or a subway. I

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Speaker 1: used to get the same foot long sandwich every day

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Speaker 1: and I would try to keep it all day, but

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Speaker 1: I would eat it in one sitting, and I would

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Speaker 1: always want another one, because once you start a bench,

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Speaker 1: you're just like, I'll just keep going, and um, I

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Speaker 1: would just go. I would drive so far out of

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Speaker 1: my way to not see another person that worked there,

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Speaker 1: so I wouldn't get the judgment that I got at

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Speaker 1: the Starbucks downstairs the other day. But now I own it.

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Speaker 1: I was joking when I say I get a bunch.

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Speaker 1: Sometimes I get too because I just want them back

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Speaker 1: to back, not because I don't want to go back

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Speaker 1: into the store. But there is a slight shame of

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Speaker 1: knowing you are doing addictive behavior that is abnormal. Oh

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Speaker 1: I do it a golf galaxy and uh what I mean.

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Speaker 1: I'll go in, I'll put it for two hours. I'll

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Speaker 1: hit different clubs. I've traded in numerous amount of clubs

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Speaker 1: where um, and then they joke with me about the

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Speaker 1: guy that's like, can you believe this guy fucking trades

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Speaker 1: in every fucking three weeks? A new driver like it's

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Speaker 1: going to help him and it's not his horrible swing

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Speaker 1: and he really isn't that good at golf. I'm like, wait, wait,

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Speaker 1: is it like you left the tag on? You're like,

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Speaker 1: I haven't used this, but they know, no, you just

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Speaker 1: trade in for less. So let's say you buy They

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Speaker 1: sell you stuff all the time. Yeah, no they don't.

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Speaker 1: I won't buy you stuf. I'll buy new stuff. I should. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: you should. Yeah, of course, of course I should. But

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Speaker 1: you think, is there a part of you that thinks

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Speaker 1: it didn't work for the last person, why would it

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Speaker 1: work for me? Yeah? Probably, and all the stuff. Yeah

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Speaker 1: it's stupid, But I'm actually I am kind of done

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Speaker 1: with the trading up and the idea of like, oh

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Speaker 1: this will change, this will help me. It's fun, though,

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Speaker 1: there's something, there's an enjoyment with it. There's you know,

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Speaker 1: getting lost in it, the addiction of it. I was

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Speaker 1: thinking about the fandom thing though, too, about like, you know,

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Speaker 1: we have some friends that are really close or that

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Speaker 1: are in the locker room at times, and they'll tell

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Speaker 1: you stories about like how the players don't care really

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Speaker 1: at all, even about winning or losing, or their fans

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Speaker 1: for that matter. So that leaves a little bad taste

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Speaker 1: in my mouth too sometimes where it's like, Oh, they

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Speaker 1: don't give a shit about me, why should I care

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Speaker 1: about them? But then also in your living room screaming

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Speaker 1: and going like God damn it, like why why do

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Speaker 1: that if it doesn't matter? Well, I don't, I don't,

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Speaker 1: I don't do. My dad does that a lot. My dad.

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Speaker 1: You would think you're at the game in the front

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Speaker 1: row and he just got hit by one of the players.

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Speaker 1: The way he yells, I'm jealous of that. Enthusiasts agreed.

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Speaker 1: I am too, But I don't know why I get

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Speaker 1: pessimistic about him. Legal you know, I was really pestive.

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Speaker 1: I mean I'm not as much but the biggest fan

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Speaker 1: you've ever been of anything Tom Petty seeing him in concerts,

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Speaker 1: do you ever get into an obsession of like putting

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Speaker 1: his poster on your wall and wanting to read every

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Speaker 1: book and every little thing about him? I mean I

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Speaker 1: saw his documentary, which is did you see it like

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Speaker 1: as soon as it came out, and were you like

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Speaker 1: in the I was really involved in it, and and

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Speaker 1: and seeing him live. I saw him live war times.

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Speaker 1: I saw him right before he died. With my brothers

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Speaker 1: were singing every word like there's something, there's a story

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Speaker 1: behind every song, and like when it was not stuff

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Speaker 1: like that, not that far. But I know he's from Florida,

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Speaker 1: being of mind to know every little detail. I did

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Speaker 1: it with the Beatles, but then that became overwhelming and

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Speaker 1: it was my first My dad bought the anthology book

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Speaker 1: and when the anthologies were coming out in like ninety six,

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Speaker 1: it was like the second And there's the coolest moment

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Speaker 1: I think for me and my dad ever, was because

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Speaker 1: my dad's just as big of a Beatle fan as

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Speaker 1: I am, like a Taylor Swift fan. And um, when

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Speaker 1: the Beatles anthologies came out, there they released new music

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Speaker 1: that they found in these tapes and there um one

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Speaker 1: is called Real Love and the other is Funck. It

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Speaker 1: was the first one that was released, but it was

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Speaker 1: that was like the coolest moment because I was maybe

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Speaker 1: seventh or sixth and seventh grade, but I was the

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Speaker 1: first time my dad and I we equally were like,

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Speaker 1: we're getting new Beatles music. So we heard a new

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Speaker 1: whose song and we're just like, you know, it blew

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Speaker 1: our minds to hear and it was just like a

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Speaker 1: shared moment of like such fandom. And also he got

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Speaker 1: me into will Go like there's there's all those Um, yeah,

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Speaker 1: my dad loved traveling will Berries and he loved Tom

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Speaker 1: so there's definitely like daddy loved me. So I learned

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Speaker 1: the lyrics to you know, American Girl. But um, I've

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Speaker 1: been obsessed with Friends the show. I used to get

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Speaker 1: all the books and read every single piece of information

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Speaker 1: I could about them. I've been obsessed with Dave Matthews,

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Speaker 1: Counting Crows, Will Go, any boy bands for you two? No,

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Speaker 1: you know, I was just a little bit too old

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Speaker 1: for backstreet boys and and young and old for young

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Speaker 1: for new kids, and old for obviously one direction. I'm

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Speaker 1: old enough where girls had Jean jackets with like their

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Speaker 1: Donnie who that girl is pretty cool, that Donnie you know.

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Speaker 1: That was the whole thing though, Like this is you know,

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Speaker 1: this is who I am? This person in this bay.

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Speaker 1: It's just looking for identity for sure. Let's go to

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Speaker 1: break and talk about more stuff. When we would get back, Andrew,

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Speaker 1: I'm over the shoulder of a young lady. But I'm

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Speaker 1: not creepying down the block and we're back. Um, what's

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Speaker 1: been Uh, I'm just a question about the lyrics thing,

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Speaker 1: because you were talking about lyrics. I could I've learned,

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Speaker 1: as we saw yesterday, I'm extremely lyrical, but now i've

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Speaker 1: I've learned like songs before, but all I could know

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Speaker 1: the words to songs and not the meaning or play

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Speaker 1: the story in my brain. No, is not a lyric either.

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Speaker 1: We've learned. Oh yeah, you're not a lyric hat either.

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Speaker 1: It's more of a feeling, I guess. But she doesn't

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Speaker 1: even memorize them. Recently, I've been I've been looking, oh,

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Speaker 1: you don't even memorize them. I've been looking at like

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Speaker 1: lyric genius or whatever whatever gen and and really going

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Speaker 1: over like Sturgill Simpson, Jason Isabel, what does it mean? Like?

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Speaker 1: Why are they saying these words? What's the build up?

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Speaker 1: What's the story like? What like? How did they put

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Speaker 1: it together? For the first time in my life? And

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Speaker 1: I think there's a lot of people that know songs

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Speaker 1: but don't know songs, yes out there, and I don't know,

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Speaker 1: there's just a different kind of brain. Whenever I'm on

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Speaker 1: the Instagram playing music and people like request songs that

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Speaker 1: I like, known forever, and then I pull up the

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Speaker 1: lyrics and I'm like that's the lyric, Like there's like

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Speaker 1: moments like that and um, yeah you you uh would

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Speaker 1: you take the c D and read? My god, I

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Speaker 1: mean with the ones I loved, you know, not with

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Speaker 1: every single song, but I love there was something about

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Speaker 1: right like, oh I just loved and I loved because

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Speaker 1: so much of Dave Matthews is like horness and a

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Speaker 1: home horness and no wa yeah, and so you would

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Speaker 1: need to know what the funk he was talking about.

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Speaker 1: And thank god for liner notes. Um TikTok is really

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Speaker 1: funny with that ship with Pearl Jam. Have you seen

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Speaker 1: Oh yeah, there's one where there's like a sign in

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Speaker 1: in some you know, Denmark or something. They're just breaking

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Speaker 1: down the lyric and there's just like what he's what

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Speaker 1: they think he's saying versus what he's Oh my god,

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Speaker 1: it's the funniest should ever. But yeah, so you wouldn't

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Speaker 1: know until you read it and then right or I

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Speaker 1: would think I would know and then be so like

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Speaker 1: there's a lot of Taylor Swift ones like that where

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Speaker 1: you know, in the subreddit people will be like what

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Speaker 1: did you think this was? And then what was it?

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Speaker 1: And there's tons that, Um, I can't think of any

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Speaker 1: right now that I always Oh, this is a weird

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Speaker 1: one I do, and this is this is where a

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Speaker 1: very select group of people. This is so there in

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Speaker 1: blank space, she goes, um, uh, so hey, let's be friends. Uh,

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Speaker 1: you know it's like Cherlotte. Wait, I forget what it's

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Speaker 1: something before something Hey, let's be friends. Um, but think

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Speaker 1: space lyrics. I'll find it one second. Oh okay, Uh,

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Speaker 1: she goes new money student. I can read you like

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Speaker 1: a magazine, ain't it funny? Rumors fly? And I know

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Speaker 1: you heard about me an, so hey, let's be friends.

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Speaker 1: I'm dying to see how this one ends. Well. When

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Speaker 1: I was listening to the serial podcast the first one,

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Speaker 1: do you know with um um odd? Not yes? And

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Speaker 1: he murders? Does anyone remember the name of the girl

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Speaker 1: he murders? Know? Her name is hey man Lee, her name,

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Speaker 1: her first name was Hey. And so when she goes,

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Speaker 1: so hey, let's be friends, I picture Taylor Swift saying

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Speaker 1: hello to the woman that was murdered. And I don't

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Speaker 1: know what is wrong with me, but I always think

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Speaker 1: of so hey, let's be friends, Like she's befriending this

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Speaker 1: um Asian girl in the year two thousand. There was

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Speaker 1: another part in the commencement speech I had to write

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Speaker 1: it down that I wanted to bring up to you.

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Speaker 1: It's the part where she was talking about how she

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Speaker 1: never gives advice unless someone asked her for it, because

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Speaker 1: throughout her career, from starting young young, she's always gotten

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Speaker 1: unsolicited advice from like executives and this and that, And

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Speaker 1: she says, she goes that like she she always had

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Speaker 1: this in the back of her mind that if she

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Speaker 1: made any mistakes, all the children of America would grow

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Speaker 1: up to If she didn't make any mistakes, all of

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Speaker 1: the children of America would grow up to be perfect.

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Speaker 1: Do you remember when she talked about that. Yes, And

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Speaker 1: because she said that, so many people said you're setting

390
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Speaker 1: an example for young girls, and so don't mess up,

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Speaker 1: and that if she did mess up, they would all

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Speaker 1: be fucked and if she did didn't, they would be okay.

393
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Speaker 1: So it was like on her shoulders. The more fans

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Speaker 1: she got, the more like she she was the older

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Speaker 1: sister for all of these young people. She was like, there, yeah,

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00:20:51,920 --> 00:20:55,360
Speaker 1: that was interesting, and that's I always I always cite

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Speaker 1: that as an example of like I've heard that before

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Speaker 1: from people who mean a lot to me of saying

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00:21:01,320 --> 00:21:03,520
Speaker 1: what you did here is a really girls are looking

400
00:21:03,560 --> 00:21:05,840
Speaker 1: up to you and this is really not a good look.

401
00:21:06,320 --> 00:21:10,440
Speaker 1: And I don't know, I've never really struggled with being

402
00:21:10,520 --> 00:21:13,000
Speaker 1: a good example. And there have been people writing to

403
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Speaker 1: me about like, hey, the way you talked about food

404
00:21:15,240 --> 00:21:17,480
Speaker 1: today or like you feel fat, Like that really made

405
00:21:17,480 --> 00:21:19,400
Speaker 1: me feel sad, and that's like not a good example

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Speaker 1: to women. And then I catch myself and I go, yeah,

407
00:21:21,600 --> 00:21:23,040
Speaker 1: you're right, like I was just in a bad state

408
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Speaker 1: of mind. But I always argue, like I it was

409
00:21:27,840 --> 00:21:30,399
Speaker 1: way more detrimental to me as a young girl to

410
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Speaker 1: see people being like seeming like they were so okay

411
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Speaker 1: with their bodies and like the way the world was

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Speaker 1: and acting like everything was okay. I think that this

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Speaker 1: fake body positivity is way more harmful to women than

414
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Speaker 1: women just skinny women being like I hate my body

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Speaker 1: and it sucks and I don't know why. Like that,

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Speaker 1: that at least addresses the issue of like I'm I

417
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Speaker 1: know that this is wrong to say, but I'm struggling

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Speaker 1: with it. So you don't feel then bad, Like I

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Speaker 1: know that that can make you feel bad if you're

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Speaker 1: bigger than that girl to go like, well, then she

421
00:22:01,320 --> 00:22:03,879
Speaker 1: probably thinks I'm fat. But what it deals, what it

422
00:22:03,920 --> 00:22:06,760
Speaker 1: then causes us to address, is this skinny woman thinks

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Speaker 1: she's fat? What is the issue here as opposed to this,

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Speaker 1: as supposed to everyone being like, I love my body

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Speaker 1: and if you don't, you're failing. So I just I

426
00:22:16,200 --> 00:22:22,080
Speaker 1: think lying, even even if the truth is something that's

427
00:22:22,080 --> 00:22:25,119
Speaker 1: really ugly, lying is worse than that for um, the

428
00:22:25,200 --> 00:22:29,560
Speaker 1: future generation. I guess. I guess though, It's like, what

429
00:22:29,640 --> 00:22:33,879
Speaker 1: if someone is completely happy and completely content with being

430
00:22:34,240 --> 00:22:39,320
Speaker 1: overweight or be like they really feel like yeah, but

431
00:22:39,359 --> 00:22:43,080
Speaker 1: then but I know, but do you think that they're there?

432
00:22:43,119 --> 00:22:45,880
Speaker 1: I know for a fact women who claim to love

433
00:22:45,920 --> 00:22:48,040
Speaker 1: their bodies and then I know that they don't. Well,

434
00:22:48,080 --> 00:22:49,439
Speaker 1: I mean, there's a big thing going on right now

435
00:22:49,520 --> 00:22:52,359
Speaker 1: with the Sports Illustrated cover. I don't know if god,

436
00:22:52,760 --> 00:22:55,720
Speaker 1: I hated that cover so much, not the fact that

437
00:22:55,760 --> 00:22:57,600
Speaker 1: they put a bigger girl in there, the fact that

438
00:22:57,600 --> 00:22:59,720
Speaker 1: they put an older woman on there. It was it's

439
00:22:59,760 --> 00:23:03,399
Speaker 1: all just such, here you go, Yeah, we are woke,

440
00:23:03,920 --> 00:23:06,360
Speaker 1: and then what what we still have? Kim Kardashian does

441
00:23:06,400 --> 00:23:10,800
Speaker 1: this make up for it? I posted something Yeah, I

442
00:23:10,840 --> 00:23:13,359
Speaker 1: posted on I posted that. I took it down immediately

443
00:23:13,400 --> 00:23:14,800
Speaker 1: because I was like, I don't want to get pulled

444
00:23:14,800 --> 00:23:17,040
Speaker 1: into this. But I posted the old woman cover and

445
00:23:17,040 --> 00:23:19,120
Speaker 1: I go, does this make up for? And I was good,

446
00:23:19,160 --> 00:23:21,600
Speaker 1: dota dot this and I was gonna do Kim Kardashian.

447
00:23:21,640 --> 00:23:25,200
Speaker 1: It's like, no, we see through it. No one is jerking.

448
00:23:25,400 --> 00:23:28,800
Speaker 1: Sports Illustrated is to jerk off to no one's jerking.

449
00:23:28,800 --> 00:23:31,359
Speaker 1: No one should be jerking off to a sixty eight

450
00:23:31,680 --> 00:23:35,040
Speaker 1: seventy year old woman in a waterfall. I'm sorry, that's weird.

451
00:23:35,920 --> 00:23:39,080
Speaker 1: She's still beautiful, but it doesn't belong in Sports Illustrated, Like,

452
00:23:39,359 --> 00:23:42,359
Speaker 1: what are we doing here? It's fine, Like she's a

453
00:23:42,359 --> 00:23:45,160
Speaker 1: beautiful woman. I would kill to look like that woman.

454
00:23:45,359 --> 00:23:47,600
Speaker 1: I'm glad she felt herself. I think women should be

455
00:23:47,600 --> 00:23:50,879
Speaker 1: in swimsuits. Yeah, sexualize them all you want, but but

456
00:23:50,960 --> 00:23:54,159
Speaker 1: they were not. Actually they don't. Actually they don't care.

457
00:23:55,160 --> 00:23:59,880
Speaker 1: Photographer who is some caddie little bitch who makes girls

458
00:24:00,000 --> 00:24:02,679
Speaker 1: feel bad about themselves. Because I've had photographers who are

459
00:24:02,720 --> 00:24:04,840
Speaker 1: used to shooting models and they make you feel bad

460
00:24:04,840 --> 00:24:08,159
Speaker 1: that you're not a model. They were not loving that shoot.

461
00:24:08,200 --> 00:24:10,119
Speaker 1: They were like, oh I got the old woman today,

462
00:24:10,119 --> 00:24:14,000
Speaker 1: Like It's no one that was all orchestrated. He was

463
00:24:14,040 --> 00:24:17,960
Speaker 1: all performative. They want people talk, they want us talking

464
00:24:18,000 --> 00:24:19,760
Speaker 1: about it like we are right now. But you know what,

465
00:24:20,480 --> 00:24:23,679
Speaker 1: I take it all back because if it does make older,

466
00:24:23,680 --> 00:24:25,600
Speaker 1: if my mom sees that and goes, oh, maybe I

467
00:24:25,640 --> 00:24:27,439
Speaker 1: could wear a swimsuit like that and be proud and

468
00:24:27,480 --> 00:24:32,200
Speaker 1: like look stunning and a little bit sexual, fine, like

469
00:24:32,240 --> 00:24:34,639
Speaker 1: then that's good. Or the bigger woman that you know

470
00:24:34,760 --> 00:24:38,880
Speaker 1: Jordan Peterson gotten, he's pretty much canceled now because he

471
00:24:38,880 --> 00:24:42,160
Speaker 1: he was just being fucking mean, like this is not set.

472
00:24:42,240 --> 00:24:43,960
Speaker 1: What did he say, Well, this whole thing is. He

473
00:24:44,080 --> 00:24:47,800
Speaker 1: was like not beautiful, like very like not beautiful. He

474
00:24:47,920 --> 00:24:53,160
Speaker 1: ties it into like the woke taking control. I know,

475
00:24:53,240 --> 00:24:55,720
Speaker 1: but I'm saying though, like it could just like you

476
00:24:55,720 --> 00:24:58,760
Speaker 1: don't have to bring out that into everything. I don't know.

477
00:24:58,840 --> 00:25:01,440
Speaker 1: I just felt like I thought the older woman was

478
00:25:01,480 --> 00:25:03,760
Speaker 1: the one that where I go, come on guys. Well

479
00:25:03,880 --> 00:25:06,720
Speaker 1: he went, and then a lot of people on Twitter

480
00:25:06,760 --> 00:25:09,399
Speaker 1: when after him, and then he goes, Twitter is volatile

481
00:25:09,440 --> 00:25:11,399
Speaker 1: and people are coming after me, and then left Twitter

482
00:25:12,440 --> 00:25:15,679
Speaker 1: crying bully, which was talked about actually on Sam Harris.

483
00:25:15,880 --> 00:25:18,119
Speaker 1: I don't know if you listened to it, but the

484
00:25:18,160 --> 00:25:20,280
Speaker 1: crying bully, the guy that's the bully, and then when

485
00:25:20,280 --> 00:25:23,320
Speaker 1: it turns to him, Yeah, I mean it happens all

486
00:25:23,320 --> 00:25:25,760
Speaker 1: the time, But that the older woman, I will say, like,

487
00:25:26,200 --> 00:25:29,960
Speaker 1: I will be seventy something someday, um if I if

488
00:25:30,000 --> 00:25:33,359
Speaker 1: my brain lets me make it that far, and I

489
00:25:33,200 --> 00:25:36,040
Speaker 1: I feel like I will look back on that and

490
00:25:36,080 --> 00:25:38,159
Speaker 1: be like, that is lovely. I'm glad they gave her

491
00:25:38,200 --> 00:25:43,320
Speaker 1: a chance. But I still want acknowledgment that we are

492
00:25:44,119 --> 00:25:46,919
Speaker 1: play cating you. We are that we are playing a

493
00:25:47,000 --> 00:25:51,000
Speaker 1: game we want to get away with still being you know,

494
00:25:51,760 --> 00:25:56,280
Speaker 1: ogling women for being a certain body type and worshiping

495
00:25:56,359 --> 00:26:00,159
Speaker 1: Kim Kardashian and giving this person who by all means

496
00:26:00,200 --> 00:26:02,400
Speaker 1: is setting bad examples for women with her diet talk

497
00:26:02,440 --> 00:26:04,360
Speaker 1: and stuff like that. We want to still be able

498
00:26:04,359 --> 00:26:06,640
Speaker 1: to support her. So if we do this too, it's

499
00:26:06,680 --> 00:26:12,119
Speaker 1: like when people you know, amber heard donating donating in quotations.

500
00:26:12,600 --> 00:26:14,800
Speaker 1: It's fine. We all do it all day long where

501
00:26:14,800 --> 00:26:16,119
Speaker 1: we go. I can have some of this if I

502
00:26:16,119 --> 00:26:21,640
Speaker 1: eat the salad like sad if they did all overweight

503
00:26:21,680 --> 00:26:25,760
Speaker 1: women and all older, all older overweight across the board.

504
00:26:26,160 --> 00:26:27,800
Speaker 1: How do you feel about that I would love it.

505
00:26:28,400 --> 00:26:32,000
Speaker 1: I would love it. But that doesn't that they can't

506
00:26:32,000 --> 00:26:35,080
Speaker 1: come out with like another thing. They have to switch completely.

507
00:26:35,400 --> 00:26:38,439
Speaker 1: Now that's not to say I still this is like, um,

508
00:26:38,480 --> 00:26:41,800
Speaker 1: what's it called? You know where they well, you know

509
00:26:41,840 --> 00:26:47,000
Speaker 1: where they affirmative action where you you just acknowledge we

510
00:26:47,040 --> 00:26:51,680
Speaker 1: are trying to alleviate a problem, which is there are

511
00:26:51,720 --> 00:26:55,040
Speaker 1: too many of one kind of person representat here, so

512
00:26:55,119 --> 00:26:59,480
Speaker 1: we are purposely putting in people that represent another uh

513
00:26:59,600 --> 00:27:03,200
Speaker 1: minor already then that's fine. Just acknowledge that what you're doing.

514
00:27:03,320 --> 00:27:05,919
Speaker 1: And maybe they did. Maybe they go, we're tired of

515
00:27:05,920 --> 00:27:08,280
Speaker 1: having the same body image. We want to represent other people.

516
00:27:08,520 --> 00:27:11,280
Speaker 1: But to me being like, we didn't know that. We

517
00:27:11,400 --> 00:27:13,800
Speaker 1: just realized these women are beautiful to come on in.

518
00:27:14,160 --> 00:27:19,320
Speaker 1: No no, no, no no, and there's a Native American. Yeah,

519
00:27:19,359 --> 00:27:21,760
Speaker 1: I was thinking about good. I don't know why, but

520
00:27:21,840 --> 00:27:24,359
Speaker 1: I was like I was thinking, like there's always like

521
00:27:24,520 --> 00:27:27,520
Speaker 1: they give you like one or two minorities, or one

522
00:27:27,640 --> 00:27:31,919
Speaker 1: or two overweight or one old lady and and people

523
00:27:31,920 --> 00:27:34,600
Speaker 1: get crazy about it. That's what made me think, like

524
00:27:34,880 --> 00:27:37,440
Speaker 1: what if Sports Illustrated was like, we're only putting in

525
00:27:37,520 --> 00:27:41,520
Speaker 1: African American women and it's all African Americans all and

526
00:27:41,560 --> 00:27:44,679
Speaker 1: maybe one white person and just to kind of finally

527
00:27:44,760 --> 00:27:47,760
Speaker 1: understand like what it's being seen from the other way.

528
00:27:48,200 --> 00:27:51,520
Speaker 1: I feel like sometimes they don't go far enough to

529
00:27:51,640 --> 00:27:56,159
Speaker 1: show their message. Magazine there's there's plenty of black, but

530
00:27:56,840 --> 00:27:59,640
Speaker 1: that's a black magazine I'm saying. I'm saying, a magazine

531
00:27:59,640 --> 00:28:03,600
Speaker 1: that has been predominantly white forever. Yeah, I like that

532
00:28:03,640 --> 00:28:07,240
Speaker 1: would fucking for me. That would be like, oh, okay,

533
00:28:07,440 --> 00:28:10,080
Speaker 1: they're really showing a statement here. But these like subtle

534
00:28:10,160 --> 00:28:13,800
Speaker 1: like you know yeah, and it's like Nike like taking

535
00:28:13,840 --> 00:28:16,760
Speaker 1: on Kaepernick and like, oh, we don't care about our sales.

536
00:28:16,800 --> 00:28:20,000
Speaker 1: We're we're welke and we're for him. But they know

537
00:28:20,080 --> 00:28:21,879
Speaker 1: that it always helps them. But it's always about the

538
00:28:21,880 --> 00:28:23,960
Speaker 1: bottom line and that's what that's all it is, and

539
00:28:24,000 --> 00:28:26,439
Speaker 1: just be honest about it. It's like when um women

540
00:28:26,600 --> 00:28:29,439
Speaker 1: on comedy shows, there's always one, but like and if

541
00:28:29,480 --> 00:28:31,160
Speaker 1: they try to do too, they go, we got a woman,

542
00:28:31,200 --> 00:28:33,800
Speaker 1: all right, sorry, we we already booked one, and it's

543
00:28:33,840 --> 00:28:36,440
Speaker 1: just like now there's we're up to. Like maybe there

544
00:28:36,440 --> 00:28:38,880
Speaker 1: can be like two per show, but if it's an

545
00:28:38,920 --> 00:28:41,200
Speaker 1: all woman line up, it would be like that, you

546
00:28:41,240 --> 00:28:45,000
Speaker 1: would have to call it something comedy cram yeah, yeah, yeah,

547
00:28:45,080 --> 00:28:48,960
Speaker 1: yeah yeah, overary, yeah, overary, calm. Yeah, I don't know,

548
00:28:49,080 --> 00:28:51,600
Speaker 1: something something better than what we just came up with me,

549
00:28:51,720 --> 00:28:55,400
Speaker 1: but you know, playing it out, Yeah, I just I look,

550
00:28:56,800 --> 00:28:59,120
Speaker 1: it's an it's annoying where it's like, you know, just

551
00:28:59,280 --> 00:29:03,240
Speaker 1: talking to me. I don't know why. Hey, my eyes

552
00:29:03,280 --> 00:29:10,760
Speaker 1: are up here. Comedy show, philopian, philopian funny. These hips

553
00:29:10,960 --> 00:29:15,400
Speaker 1: are childbirth have to go because we have a special segment.

554
00:29:15,640 --> 00:29:18,640
Speaker 1: What happened? Oh well we we we boom boom boom

555
00:29:18,840 --> 00:29:20,800
Speaker 1: the news. We get through it so fast that you

556
00:29:20,800 --> 00:29:24,520
Speaker 1: don't even hear. Sometimes it doesn't happen because it's so fast.

557
00:29:24,680 --> 00:29:29,840
Speaker 1: Slow it down. We went, Oh yeah we are. We're

558
00:29:29,840 --> 00:29:34,840
Speaker 1: just chill here. We're such someone bribe listens to us

559
00:29:34,880 --> 00:29:38,760
Speaker 1: on point o four or whatever. I'm not joking you.

560
00:29:38,880 --> 00:29:42,640
Speaker 1: My friends and I have a WhatsApp thread that Noah

561
00:29:42,720 --> 00:29:46,160
Speaker 1: is on. Oddly enough, she's poor thing. Do you turn

562
00:29:46,240 --> 00:29:48,600
Speaker 1: those alerts off? Noah? Right? Oh yeah, it would be

563
00:29:48,680 --> 00:29:51,320
Speaker 1: so funny for you to open your will you open

564
00:29:51,360 --> 00:29:54,360
Speaker 1: your what'sapp app to see how many messages you have

565
00:29:54,560 --> 00:29:56,960
Speaker 1: unread from our group? Because no one's in our group.

566
00:29:56,960 --> 00:30:01,719
Speaker 1: It's me, Sarah, Lena, Noah, Robin, uh, Perston, Um and

567
00:30:01,800 --> 00:30:05,560
Speaker 1: Taylor and Noah dropped off like in August when and

568
00:30:05,560 --> 00:30:08,120
Speaker 1: and obviously no one we've sometimes you just talked to

569
00:30:08,120 --> 00:30:09,640
Speaker 1: no One and go like no, if you do hear this,

570
00:30:09,720 --> 00:30:11,640
Speaker 1: we don't care that you're not getting back to us.

571
00:30:11,800 --> 00:30:14,320
Speaker 1: Just know that, like, do not ever feel bad about

572
00:30:14,360 --> 00:30:16,280
Speaker 1: not because some of us drop off for like weeks

573
00:30:16,280 --> 00:30:18,480
Speaker 1: at a time, and like it's just the most forgiving,

574
00:30:18,880 --> 00:30:23,960
Speaker 1: awesome little place to be. But um we uh we

575
00:30:24,040 --> 00:30:25,760
Speaker 1: talked about that in there because you can speed it

576
00:30:25,840 --> 00:30:30,040
Speaker 1: up and everyone listens to I listened to Robin. I

577
00:30:30,080 --> 00:30:31,920
Speaker 1: think we talked about this. I listened to Robin on

578
00:30:31,920 --> 00:30:35,200
Speaker 1: one point five because she is British and so sometimes

579
00:30:35,200 --> 00:30:37,440
Speaker 1: and she talks fast. I listened to Selena on two.

580
00:30:37,800 --> 00:30:39,760
Speaker 1: I listened to Curson on two. I listened to Taylor

581
00:30:39,760 --> 00:30:42,480
Speaker 1: on too. And for me, they just listened on one.

582
00:30:42,640 --> 00:30:45,680
Speaker 1: It's so funny that you've just made all your friendship monks.

583
00:30:46,760 --> 00:30:48,760
Speaker 1: I swear to God. And then when I talked to

584
00:30:48,800 --> 00:30:50,880
Speaker 1: them in real time, I'm like, did you have stroke?

585
00:30:52,480 --> 00:30:54,800
Speaker 1: I also listened to Chris's show The Courtney show every

586
00:30:54,880 --> 00:30:57,360
Speaker 1: day and it's always like that. Even and they have

587
00:30:57,400 --> 00:31:00,520
Speaker 1: this one segment called um Can't eight and they do

588
00:31:00,640 --> 00:31:02,600
Speaker 1: it's a theme song. It's called the best Thing I

589
00:31:02,600 --> 00:31:04,920
Speaker 1: Saw yesterday and they always just share, like what something

590
00:31:04,920 --> 00:31:06,480
Speaker 1: on the internet that they saw that was the best thing.

591
00:31:06,520 --> 00:31:09,680
Speaker 1: It's like, I can't wait to show my friends today

592
00:31:10,160 --> 00:31:13,760
Speaker 1: the best thing I saw yesterday. And it's like this

593
00:31:13,800 --> 00:31:16,240
Speaker 1: funny song, but every time I listen to it, it's

594
00:31:16,280 --> 00:31:18,560
Speaker 1: like goes that fast. But then I was in studio

595
00:31:18,560 --> 00:31:21,680
Speaker 1: the other day and it was like can white to

596
00:31:22,040 --> 00:31:27,480
Speaker 1: show my ford to Jay and I go, are you

597
00:31:27,560 --> 00:31:30,440
Speaker 1: guys dat? I'm like a minute of the air with

598
00:31:30,560 --> 00:31:33,360
Speaker 1: this song. So it is already slow at two times

599
00:31:33,360 --> 00:31:35,960
Speaker 1: of speed. All right, Well, we have a very special

600
00:31:36,040 --> 00:31:38,120
Speaker 1: segment coming up um that we are going to do

601
00:31:38,200 --> 00:31:42,400
Speaker 1: maybe monthly, which incorporates you the listener, So stay tuned.

602
00:31:42,400 --> 00:31:48,320
Speaker 1: We'll be back with that. Alright, We're back. So um

603
00:31:48,360 --> 00:31:50,840
Speaker 1: it's Wednesday, so we have wild Card Wednesday. We just

604
00:31:50,880 --> 00:31:52,640
Speaker 1: do different segments. We have a new one that is

605
00:31:52,680 --> 00:31:57,560
Speaker 1: going to incorporate our listeners. It's time for Betty has

606
00:31:58,040 --> 00:32:12,960
Speaker 1: Guessie Beste Guestey. Alright, today on the inaugural segment of Besties,

607
00:32:13,040 --> 00:32:17,440
Speaker 1: as guestis, um, we are having on our bestie M

608
00:32:17,440 --> 00:32:21,560
Speaker 1: who is Canadian and has a dog, definitely making a

609
00:32:21,640 --> 00:32:27,360
Speaker 1: noise out of back for the last twenty minutes. I

610
00:32:27,400 --> 00:32:30,960
Speaker 1: have to of course minutes. No, it's totally fine. We

611
00:32:31,280 --> 00:32:34,040
Speaker 1: uh we relate to that. Um M. We decided to

612
00:32:34,080 --> 00:32:36,520
Speaker 1: have on because you know, for the segment, we want

613
00:32:36,520 --> 00:32:41,200
Speaker 1: to talk to besties who have stories and experiences jobs,

614
00:32:41,560 --> 00:32:44,120
Speaker 1: life experiences that we don't have and that we want

615
00:32:44,160 --> 00:32:48,160
Speaker 1: to ask questions of. And so, um, you are a

616
00:32:48,160 --> 00:32:52,960
Speaker 1: police officer, correct, that's right. Yeah, and you've you did

617
00:32:53,000 --> 00:32:56,680
Speaker 1: a fan trax, right, and that's how we knew about

618
00:32:56,720 --> 00:32:59,680
Speaker 1: you being a police officer. Yeah, I was. It was

619
00:32:59,800 --> 00:33:01,600
Speaker 1: like three thirty in the morning and I was just

620
00:33:01,680 --> 00:33:03,440
Speaker 1: making notes from a call and I had noted that

621
00:33:03,480 --> 00:33:06,120
Speaker 1: there were were several occupants in the car. And I

622
00:33:06,200 --> 00:33:10,000
Speaker 1: laughed at myself for several thinking that several, yes, the several,

623
00:33:10,040 --> 00:33:11,800
Speaker 1: thinking Andrew would think it was like a clown car

624
00:33:11,880 --> 00:33:13,960
Speaker 1: with like hundreds of people and it was just three.

625
00:33:15,000 --> 00:33:20,240
Speaker 1: Was it some kind of riot? Then every time every

626
00:33:20,240 --> 00:33:23,640
Speaker 1: time I used that word now I laughed. Um okay,

627
00:33:23,720 --> 00:33:27,680
Speaker 1: So my first question for you is how how did

628
00:33:27,680 --> 00:33:29,960
Speaker 1: you be What did you always want to become a

629
00:33:30,040 --> 00:33:32,640
Speaker 1: police officer or was it something you kind of fell into?

630
00:33:32,680 --> 00:33:35,240
Speaker 1: How did this happen for you? I actually was a

631
00:33:35,280 --> 00:33:39,000
Speaker 1: teacher before, um, and I don't really know where the

632
00:33:39,800 --> 00:33:41,760
Speaker 1: change came from her, where the switch flipped, But I

633
00:33:41,840 --> 00:33:44,240
Speaker 1: just I found that I wanted something a little more challenging,

634
00:33:44,280 --> 00:33:47,640
Speaker 1: I think a little more exciting. So, UM, I applied

635
00:33:47,720 --> 00:33:50,920
Speaker 1: at to become a police officer and got on pretty quickly,

636
00:33:51,080 --> 00:33:53,160
Speaker 1: and it's the greatest job in the world to me.

637
00:33:53,280 --> 00:33:56,320
Speaker 1: Every day is exciting, every day is different, um, and

638
00:33:56,360 --> 00:33:58,680
Speaker 1: it's just always super challenging. So that's kind of what

639
00:33:58,760 --> 00:34:02,520
Speaker 1: led me to that was is it different being a

640
00:34:02,560 --> 00:34:06,160
Speaker 1: female police? Like? Are you there's not that many I'm

641
00:34:06,200 --> 00:34:11,000
Speaker 1: guessing as many men. Yeah, I would say the ratio

642
00:34:11,080 --> 00:34:16,360
Speaker 1: would probably be maybe like one female to like every

643
00:34:16,400 --> 00:34:19,640
Speaker 1: maybe ten to twelve men. Okay, so probably the same

644
00:34:19,680 --> 00:34:25,400
Speaker 1: as comedians probably, you know, UM, do you what is what?

645
00:34:25,719 --> 00:34:29,239
Speaker 1: During your training to become a police officer? Was there

646
00:34:29,280 --> 00:34:31,080
Speaker 1: anything that you were like, oh man, I might not

647
00:34:31,120 --> 00:34:33,480
Speaker 1: pass this, Like what was the thing that you didn't expect?

648
00:34:33,680 --> 00:34:36,080
Speaker 1: Or which was really hard because I always think about

649
00:34:36,120 --> 00:34:37,840
Speaker 1: the like the training and like how they try to

650
00:34:37,840 --> 00:34:41,480
Speaker 1: weed out the week. Yeah, I think the physical stuff

651
00:34:41,480 --> 00:34:44,799
Speaker 1: at the beginning, I was, I think overwhelmed by just

652
00:34:44,880 --> 00:34:48,759
Speaker 1: because there's it's not different for men versus women because

653
00:34:48,800 --> 00:34:51,440
Speaker 1: you don't go to calls as you know, the men

654
00:34:51,480 --> 00:34:53,239
Speaker 1: are going to go because it's a bigger part. You

655
00:34:53,280 --> 00:34:55,600
Speaker 1: go because you're there. So some of the training in

656
00:34:55,680 --> 00:34:58,439
Speaker 1: terms of the fitness stuff, um, you just have to

657
00:34:58,480 --> 00:35:01,640
Speaker 1: train really hard. Um, you know, across the style very

658
00:35:01,680 --> 00:35:06,480
Speaker 1: cup but um, you just you get through it. And um,

659
00:35:06,600 --> 00:35:09,759
Speaker 1: I don't know, it's it's a driver's test where you

660
00:35:09,840 --> 00:35:12,000
Speaker 1: just have to you know, pass it once and then

661
00:35:12,040 --> 00:35:13,600
Speaker 1: you can kind of let yourself go because there's some

662
00:35:13,640 --> 00:35:17,120
Speaker 1: cops that like, you know, could not run, you know,

663
00:35:17,160 --> 00:35:21,759
Speaker 1: a mile after themselves four years ago. Yes, yeah, I'm

664
00:35:21,760 --> 00:35:25,840
Speaker 1: gonna let him go. I'll get the next guy. Yeah,

665
00:35:25,920 --> 00:35:28,080
Speaker 1: it's at least up here. And I actually I think

666
00:35:28,080 --> 00:35:31,000
Speaker 1: in the States to um, you there's like fitness testing

667
00:35:31,000 --> 00:35:33,160
Speaker 1: that you have to pass before you can get hired,

668
00:35:33,239 --> 00:35:35,520
Speaker 1: and then like when you're at the police college or

669
00:35:35,560 --> 00:35:37,400
Speaker 1: like in the States of the academy, there's a lot

670
00:35:37,440 --> 00:35:38,920
Speaker 1: of training, but then you get hired and it's just

671
00:35:38,960 --> 00:35:41,040
Speaker 1: kind of like, we just want to keep you because

672
00:35:41,080 --> 00:35:43,000
Speaker 1: a lot of cops are quitting and retiring, so I

673
00:35:43,360 --> 00:35:45,560
Speaker 1: think they lower the bar a little bit once you're hired,

674
00:35:45,640 --> 00:35:51,880
Speaker 1: so that they just literally what what is there fear

675
00:35:52,120 --> 00:35:54,560
Speaker 1: in your mind when you think like I might have

676
00:35:54,640 --> 00:35:56,919
Speaker 1: to pull my gun, I might have to shoot my gun?

677
00:35:57,400 --> 00:36:00,680
Speaker 1: Like did you think about that before? Like the idea

678
00:36:00,680 --> 00:36:02,759
Speaker 1: of being a cop is cool, right, You're like, oh,

679
00:36:02,840 --> 00:36:04,640
Speaker 1: I'm on the beat. Yeah, I get to put on

680
00:36:04,680 --> 00:36:07,399
Speaker 1: a uniform every day, I gotta stick Like it's kind

681
00:36:07,400 --> 00:36:09,839
Speaker 1: of it's just it's like a kid's dream. Yeah. Yeah,

682
00:36:09,880 --> 00:36:12,400
Speaker 1: you got all the fun things, handcuffs, you know, and

683
00:36:12,440 --> 00:36:15,840
Speaker 1: then you get out of the bedroom. What what? No,

684
00:36:16,000 --> 00:36:18,319
Speaker 1: But like, did you ever fear that? And the think

685
00:36:18,320 --> 00:36:21,080
Speaker 1: about being in a situation that was life or death?

686
00:36:21,400 --> 00:36:25,040
Speaker 1: And how did you train your brain to eventually? And

687
00:36:25,080 --> 00:36:27,520
Speaker 1: have you been in those kind of situations or things

688
00:36:27,600 --> 00:36:30,239
Speaker 1: that you maybe never thought you'd be in but you

689
00:36:30,280 --> 00:36:33,640
Speaker 1: found yourself in. Yeah, So it's definitely not like the

690
00:36:33,719 --> 00:36:37,359
Speaker 1: movies where you know, there's all this big excitement with

691
00:36:37,400 --> 00:36:39,279
Speaker 1: those kind of gun calls and stuff like that. But

692
00:36:39,400 --> 00:36:42,040
Speaker 1: there's two things that they teach you about when you're training,

693
00:36:42,120 --> 00:36:44,920
Speaker 1: and you don't get to replicate those things until you're

694
00:36:44,960 --> 00:36:47,120
Speaker 1: actually in the situation. So one is tunnel vision and

695
00:36:47,160 --> 00:36:50,480
Speaker 1: the other's auditory exclusions. So when you're in a heightened

696
00:36:50,480 --> 00:36:55,080
Speaker 1: situation where you're facing say I had I had a

697
00:36:55,160 --> 00:36:58,799
Speaker 1: situation where um, a teenager had a knife to her

698
00:36:58,800 --> 00:37:01,680
Speaker 1: own throat. She was, you know, suicidal and obviously in

699
00:37:01,719 --> 00:37:05,839
Speaker 1: a major crisis. And when I got to the call

700
00:37:06,000 --> 00:37:08,360
Speaker 1: and actually located her, I didn't realize until I actually

701
00:37:08,440 --> 00:37:10,239
Speaker 1: got there that she did have a knife to her throat.

702
00:37:10,280 --> 00:37:12,479
Speaker 1: So she's standing there, she's got blood up her wrist,

703
00:37:12,520 --> 00:37:15,160
Speaker 1: and she's got this knife to her throat, and I

704
00:37:15,200 --> 00:37:17,279
Speaker 1: didn't hear I couldn't hear my radio, I didn't hear

705
00:37:17,320 --> 00:37:20,000
Speaker 1: anybody around me. All I was like a straight tunnel

706
00:37:20,080 --> 00:37:21,759
Speaker 1: just right to her. And then it was like I'm

707
00:37:21,800 --> 00:37:23,439
Speaker 1: just yelling to her, you know, drop the knife, drop

708
00:37:23,440 --> 00:37:25,640
Speaker 1: the knife. I want to help you. And all that's

709
00:37:25,640 --> 00:37:28,200
Speaker 1: from my training. It's like my brain didn't even process

710
00:37:28,239 --> 00:37:30,040
Speaker 1: what was happening, or I wasn't aware of it. I

711
00:37:30,120 --> 00:37:32,080
Speaker 1: just my training came out. And then it's like all

712
00:37:32,080 --> 00:37:33,640
Speaker 1: of a sudden, I blinked and I had like five

713
00:37:33,640 --> 00:37:35,680
Speaker 1: other officers there and we you know, we got her

714
00:37:35,719 --> 00:37:37,680
Speaker 1: on the ground safely, and we got her apprehended and

715
00:37:37,719 --> 00:37:39,600
Speaker 1: took her to the the hospital. But it's like your training

716
00:37:39,680 --> 00:37:41,439
Speaker 1: kicks in and it's like all of your other things,

717
00:37:41,480 --> 00:37:44,200
Speaker 1: Like I wouldn't have been able to hear a a

718
00:37:44,239 --> 00:37:48,239
Speaker 1: train behind me. It's like, yeah, so it's crazy. Is

719
00:37:48,280 --> 00:37:51,200
Speaker 1: that from doing it from repetition when you're training, Because

720
00:37:51,200 --> 00:37:54,799
Speaker 1: that kind of instinct doesn't lock in unless you've done

721
00:37:54,800 --> 00:37:57,640
Speaker 1: it so many times over and over and it becomes habitual.

722
00:37:57,680 --> 00:38:01,080
Speaker 1: I mean, is the training extensive, like of of putting

723
00:38:01,080 --> 00:38:03,160
Speaker 1: you in those positions over and over so that you

724
00:38:03,200 --> 00:38:06,120
Speaker 1: can just click into it. Yeah, I would say, like

725
00:38:06,360 --> 00:38:08,480
Speaker 1: maybe not so much situational, but like when we do

726
00:38:08,520 --> 00:38:11,080
Speaker 1: our you know, like our firearm training, we do a

727
00:38:11,080 --> 00:38:12,880
Speaker 1: lot of you know, pulling your gun and issue in

728
00:38:12,920 --> 00:38:14,839
Speaker 1: commands like drop the gun, drop the gun, and drop

729
00:38:14,840 --> 00:38:17,120
Speaker 1: the knife. I want to help you. Um, So you

730
00:38:17,200 --> 00:38:18,880
Speaker 1: kind of just get that instinct when you pull your

731
00:38:18,880 --> 00:38:20,960
Speaker 1: taser out or you pull your gun out. You're automatically

732
00:38:20,960 --> 00:38:22,640
Speaker 1: saying those things and then I think it all just

733
00:38:22,719 --> 00:38:24,680
Speaker 1: kind of clicks and you're also going to a call

734
00:38:24,800 --> 00:38:27,799
Speaker 1: you at least I I'm kind of playing worst case

735
00:38:27,800 --> 00:38:29,160
Speaker 1: scenario in my head. So if I'm going to a

736
00:38:29,200 --> 00:38:32,040
Speaker 1: call where it's like, oh, you know, gun drops and

737
00:38:32,080 --> 00:38:34,160
Speaker 1: we get those a lot, and it's you know, fireworks

738
00:38:34,239 --> 00:38:35,560
Speaker 1: or a car back browning, but you play the worst

739
00:38:35,600 --> 00:38:37,319
Speaker 1: case scenario in your head and kind of anticipate how

740
00:38:37,320 --> 00:38:40,680
Speaker 1: you're going to respond. Yeah, So on the way there,

741
00:38:40,719 --> 00:38:43,520
Speaker 1: you're almost running through what you will do in this

742
00:38:43,600 --> 00:38:47,080
Speaker 1: circumstance so that when it actually happens, it just goes naturally. Okay,

743
00:38:47,239 --> 00:38:50,960
Speaker 1: what we're going Cops? Obviously in America the last few years,

744
00:38:51,200 --> 00:38:54,080
Speaker 1: I mean, it hasn't been the best pr for them lately.

745
00:38:54,120 --> 00:38:57,239
Speaker 1: Does that transfer over to Canada? Do you guys talk

746
00:38:57,320 --> 00:39:00,960
Speaker 1: about how the cops system is in America? How you know,

747
00:39:01,280 --> 00:39:04,840
Speaker 1: maybe certain bad cops aren't called out by good cops,

748
00:39:05,280 --> 00:39:08,480
Speaker 1: and do you deal with that in Canada? That that,

749
00:39:08,560 --> 00:39:11,040
Speaker 1: you know, the backlash that happens in America. And also

750
00:39:11,120 --> 00:39:14,920
Speaker 1: the people have less guns in Canada? Correct or am

751
00:39:14,920 --> 00:39:17,920
Speaker 1: I like the gun laws are different there? So does

752
00:39:17,960 --> 00:39:21,200
Speaker 1: that help you at least show up on a scene

753
00:39:21,200 --> 00:39:23,799
Speaker 1: where you're like, Okay, it's let's just see if you

754
00:39:23,840 --> 00:39:25,960
Speaker 1: were working in America, would you be a little bit

755
00:39:26,040 --> 00:39:30,919
Speaker 1: more scared. Yeah, yeah, the yeah, the gun situation down

756
00:39:30,920 --> 00:39:35,759
Speaker 1: there is, uh, in my opinion, terrifying. Um. Up here,

757
00:39:35,840 --> 00:39:37,920
Speaker 1: we have a lot of illegal guns, and that's kind

758
00:39:37,960 --> 00:39:39,959
Speaker 1: of the scary thing because I mean, at least down

759
00:39:39,960 --> 00:39:41,520
Speaker 1: in the States, you know, you're a lot more aware

760
00:39:41,520 --> 00:39:44,240
Speaker 1: of who has guns and people. I think that most

761
00:39:44,239 --> 00:39:46,359
Speaker 1: people have more of a respect for guns, at least

762
00:39:46,360 --> 00:39:48,279
Speaker 1: I think just because they own them, they've grown up

763
00:39:48,320 --> 00:39:51,799
Speaker 1: with them, whereas here it's not the case. So, um, yeah,

764
00:39:52,120 --> 00:39:54,080
Speaker 1: it can be a little scary, I guess when it

765
00:39:54,080 --> 00:39:56,400
Speaker 1: comes to the gun stuff for sure. But why are

766
00:39:56,480 --> 00:40:01,640
Speaker 1: not tasers? Why don't you just taste everyone, like instead

767
00:40:01,640 --> 00:40:03,880
Speaker 1: of shooting them? Like tasers just seem like such a

768
00:40:03,920 --> 00:40:06,600
Speaker 1: great tool to just completely Like the girl with a

769
00:40:06,719 --> 00:40:09,640
Speaker 1: knife to her throat, just taser immediately, Like well why

770
00:40:09,760 --> 00:40:12,600
Speaker 1: why try to um you know, convinced her to drop

771
00:40:12,800 --> 00:40:15,399
Speaker 1: And this is my this is obviously ignorant because it's

772
00:40:15,440 --> 00:40:17,760
Speaker 1: not the way it's done. So why not though, because

773
00:40:17,760 --> 00:40:20,320
Speaker 1: you if I got tasted the knife would like wobble

774
00:40:20,360 --> 00:40:23,759
Speaker 1: and then I drop it, you know. We yeah, so

775
00:40:23,800 --> 00:40:27,799
Speaker 1: we we did have tasers out on her or that

776
00:40:28,120 --> 00:40:31,080
Speaker 1: pillow fights, Why not pillow. Why not generally whisper in

777
00:40:31,120 --> 00:40:33,319
Speaker 1: your ear? And then like the lobo, why not put

778
00:40:33,360 --> 00:40:36,280
Speaker 1: a little laser pointer in their eye? That's annoying. Okay,

779
00:40:36,360 --> 00:40:39,359
Speaker 1: go on, I like all these suggestions. I will okay, cool, Yeah,

780
00:40:39,400 --> 00:40:44,080
Speaker 1: to bring them up the next Um, yeah, I know

781
00:40:44,120 --> 00:40:45,960
Speaker 1: we had tasers out. We had tasers out on her.

782
00:40:46,000 --> 00:40:48,560
Speaker 1: We didn't have guns out on her. Um. The taser

783
00:40:48,600 --> 00:40:51,839
Speaker 1: has certainly like I go to my taser very often.

784
00:40:51,880 --> 00:40:54,120
Speaker 1: I'm not a big person. I am five ft three.

785
00:40:54,160 --> 00:40:55,680
Speaker 1: I'm not going to win in a fist fight with

786
00:40:55,719 --> 00:40:57,640
Speaker 1: a lot of people. Um. I pulled the taser out,

787
00:40:57,640 --> 00:40:59,520
Speaker 1: and a lot of the time it's it's funny too

788
00:40:59,520 --> 00:41:01,479
Speaker 1: because you call it out and you know right away

789
00:41:01,480 --> 00:41:03,440
Speaker 1: who has been tasted before, Because the second you touch it,

790
00:41:03,440 --> 00:41:04,879
Speaker 1: they're like, no, no, no, I'm good man, I'm good.

791
00:41:04,880 --> 00:41:08,359
Speaker 1: And I'm like, oh wow, because they have you been

792
00:41:08,400 --> 00:41:10,359
Speaker 1: tasted before and your training to know what it's like.

793
00:41:10,480 --> 00:41:13,279
Speaker 1: We got yeah, we got tasted it. And how for

794
00:41:13,440 --> 00:41:16,440
Speaker 1: five seconds? What does it feel like? It feels like

795
00:41:16,480 --> 00:41:18,520
Speaker 1: imagine a lightning bolt going through the top of your

796
00:41:18,560 --> 00:41:20,360
Speaker 1: head and coming out of your foot for five seconds.

797
00:41:20,400 --> 00:41:24,680
Speaker 1: Oh god. So it's it's almost sounds worse than like

798
00:41:24,719 --> 00:41:27,080
Speaker 1: I'm reading this Columbine book. I don't mean to act

799
00:41:27,080 --> 00:41:29,719
Speaker 1: like some kind of expert uncuntess, but everyone who is

800
00:41:33,239 --> 00:41:38,399
Speaker 1: I do like rangelases Columbines by you. Oh my god,

801
00:41:38,400 --> 00:41:41,840
Speaker 1: that's so funny. Um no, it's every you know, and

802
00:41:41,920 --> 00:41:43,880
Speaker 1: we've heard the SI million times you get shot. People

803
00:41:43,960 --> 00:41:46,359
Speaker 1: just go oh, someone just shoved me from behind, like

804
00:41:46,800 --> 00:41:49,360
Speaker 1: a lot of times. Doesn't even disable someone in the

805
00:41:49,400 --> 00:41:51,400
Speaker 1: way that you think it would because your adrenaline in

806
00:41:51,440 --> 00:41:56,359
Speaker 1: that situation A taser sometimes will will people not be

807
00:41:57,080 --> 00:41:59,080
Speaker 1: debilitated from a taser. I mean I feel like that

808
00:41:59,160 --> 00:42:02,000
Speaker 1: always know. I've seen people on drugs rip them out.

809
00:42:03,000 --> 00:42:06,760
Speaker 1: That's little things. Why are there strings on the taste?

810
00:42:06,840 --> 00:42:09,719
Speaker 1: I thought it's all electricity. It is, so it goes

811
00:42:09,760 --> 00:42:12,680
Speaker 1: through those. It's called they call it neural muscular incapacitation,

812
00:42:12,719 --> 00:42:15,200
Speaker 1: which basically means for five seconds, you can't move anything

813
00:42:15,200 --> 00:42:17,120
Speaker 1: in your body. Every single muscle sees is up. It

814
00:42:17,160 --> 00:42:18,520
Speaker 1: is the worst pain. It's like you know when you

815
00:42:18,560 --> 00:42:21,960
Speaker 1: get like a calf cramp at night, It's like whole

816
00:42:22,000 --> 00:42:29,480
Speaker 1: body for five seconds. Oh my god. So um oh yeah, no,

817
00:42:29,719 --> 00:42:34,120
Speaker 1: I guess you can ask go ahead, I want them

818
00:42:34,200 --> 00:42:41,160
Speaker 1: to tell us about the call she had for stolen clothes. Okay,

819
00:42:41,200 --> 00:42:47,040
Speaker 1: so two seven so and this this was like a

820
00:42:47,160 --> 00:42:49,200
Speaker 1: very and so is some people that you don't policing

821
00:42:49,320 --> 00:42:51,320
Speaker 1: is exciting. This is just such a run of the

822
00:42:51,360 --> 00:42:53,920
Speaker 1: milk hall. So this girl called in saying that she

823
00:42:54,320 --> 00:42:57,120
Speaker 1: um her her jacket and a bunch of her pairs

824
00:42:57,160 --> 00:42:59,239
Speaker 1: of her boots were stolen. Several pairs of her boots

825
00:42:59,239 --> 00:43:02,520
Speaker 1: were stolen from her, like the front entrance of her apartment,

826
00:43:02,520 --> 00:43:05,000
Speaker 1: and she had like a shared front entryway and then

827
00:43:05,000 --> 00:43:07,600
Speaker 1: a doorway into her apartment. And I got there and

828
00:43:07,640 --> 00:43:09,160
Speaker 1: she showed me the area, and I said, okay, like

829
00:43:09,160 --> 00:43:11,400
Speaker 1: I'll step in and we can take your report. So

830
00:43:11,440 --> 00:43:14,400
Speaker 1: I step in and I'm facing her and she's telling me,

831
00:43:14,400 --> 00:43:16,040
Speaker 1: and I look up at her and there's a big,

832
00:43:16,160 --> 00:43:18,320
Speaker 1: like a shelf behind her, and she's got this massive

833
00:43:18,480 --> 00:43:21,520
Speaker 1: white dildo on this shelf, just sitting out like a

834
00:43:21,520 --> 00:43:24,759
Speaker 1: decorative peace. And I don't think I heard. Yeah, I

835
00:43:24,800 --> 00:43:26,359
Speaker 1: don't think I heard a word that she said, because

836
00:43:26,360 --> 00:43:33,600
Speaker 1: I couldn't gonna be strained behind you, which they probably

837
00:43:33,719 --> 00:43:37,880
Speaker 1: was lining up to. Fun this girl, five other women cops.

838
00:43:40,320 --> 00:43:44,799
Speaker 1: That's so funny. Men the dildo or what like. I

839
00:43:44,840 --> 00:43:46,640
Speaker 1: was so I was so distracted and I was kind

840
00:43:46,680 --> 00:43:49,400
Speaker 1: of hoping that she would notice my eyes, just like

841
00:43:49,480 --> 00:43:53,880
Speaker 1: gazing at that giant dildo. This thing was massive. Um um,

842
00:43:53,960 --> 00:43:57,560
Speaker 1: I gotta wonder, you know, whenever I encounter a cop

843
00:43:57,640 --> 00:44:00,719
Speaker 1: for some reason, I had like even talking to you,

844
00:44:00,800 --> 00:44:03,680
Speaker 1: I'm I've pictured you are on a screen in our

845
00:44:03,719 --> 00:44:06,400
Speaker 1: in our room here, and it looks like you're almost

846
00:44:06,400 --> 00:44:08,920
Speaker 1: bent down talking to me through my door of my

847
00:44:09,040 --> 00:44:12,239
Speaker 1: car and you're issuing a ticket. Like there's there's an

848
00:44:12,280 --> 00:44:17,200
Speaker 1: instinct in me that wants to apologize profusely, like kiss

849
00:44:17,239 --> 00:44:19,400
Speaker 1: your ring, do whatever I can to kiss your ass.

850
00:44:19,640 --> 00:44:22,759
Speaker 1: Like I almost don't think of cops as humans and

851
00:44:22,800 --> 00:44:26,840
Speaker 1: I want to like normal people. Let even in passing,

852
00:44:26,840 --> 00:44:28,759
Speaker 1: when you know, I'm walking the dog and there's a

853
00:44:28,800 --> 00:44:31,520
Speaker 1: cop that walks by, there's a guiltiness that, you know

854
00:44:31,920 --> 00:44:35,319
Speaker 1: falls over me. Do you remember how you used to

855
00:44:35,360 --> 00:44:37,799
Speaker 1: look at cops and is that or or like as

856
00:44:37,960 --> 00:44:42,360
Speaker 1: just a normal pedestrian ornstrian, you know, just a normal

857
00:44:42,360 --> 00:44:46,440
Speaker 1: person that is a non cop. Do you remember how

858
00:44:46,920 --> 00:44:48,799
Speaker 1: did you ever have that with cops? Were like you

859
00:44:48,840 --> 00:44:51,600
Speaker 1: just can't chill around them and do you now understand,

860
00:44:51,640 --> 00:44:54,040
Speaker 1: like do you see people tighten up when you walk by?

861
00:44:54,080 --> 00:44:55,680
Speaker 1: And is that the same in Canada? Because that's the

862
00:44:55,680 --> 00:44:58,799
Speaker 1: way it is here in the States. We we definitely intense. Absolutely.

863
00:44:58,840 --> 00:45:01,320
Speaker 1: I used to be terrified of cops and I was.

864
00:45:01,360 --> 00:45:02,759
Speaker 1: I've been pulled over a couple of times and I

865
00:45:02,760 --> 00:45:05,680
Speaker 1: remember just being absolutely terrified and thinking that they could

866
00:45:05,719 --> 00:45:08,640
Speaker 1: do absolutely anything I had. I never realized all the

867
00:45:08,680 --> 00:45:12,280
Speaker 1: freedoms that civilians have until I became a cop and realized.

868
00:45:12,320 --> 00:45:16,240
Speaker 1: People will fight speeding tickets, they'll fight disobeys, stop sign tickets,

869
00:45:16,280 --> 00:45:18,560
Speaker 1: they will do if anything, they'll video you, they'll do

870
00:45:18,600 --> 00:45:20,719
Speaker 1: the most disrespectful things that Actually this kind of lends

871
00:45:20,760 --> 00:45:23,200
Speaker 1: to another story that I was telling no about and

872
00:45:23,280 --> 00:45:25,680
Speaker 1: just how people treat cops and something that I never

873
00:45:25,719 --> 00:45:28,560
Speaker 1: would have dreamed of. So um, we had to We

874
00:45:28,600 --> 00:45:30,080
Speaker 1: went to a call where it was a check. While

875
00:45:30,120 --> 00:45:33,040
Speaker 1: being call on a guy who he locked his roommate out.

876
00:45:33,080 --> 00:45:35,600
Speaker 1: They were having a fight, and he put like a

877
00:45:35,600 --> 00:45:37,880
Speaker 1: bunch of like three or four inch screws in the

878
00:45:37,880 --> 00:45:39,520
Speaker 1: door so that even if you unlocked it, you couldn't

879
00:45:39,520 --> 00:45:42,480
Speaker 1: open it. So um, we got to actually breach the door,

880
00:45:42,520 --> 00:45:44,240
Speaker 1: which was kind of fun because I've never done that before,

881
00:45:44,280 --> 00:45:46,279
Speaker 1: and you know, breached out with my shoulder and we

882
00:45:46,440 --> 00:45:49,400
Speaker 1: go in and he's fine. Um that the apartment was nasty.

883
00:45:49,480 --> 00:45:52,319
Speaker 1: His um he hadn't had hydro um so he like

884
00:45:52,440 --> 00:45:54,480
Speaker 1: was shipping in his bathtub and it was it was

885
00:45:54,520 --> 00:45:59,120
Speaker 1: really gross. Yeah, like no running water and the appartment

886
00:45:59,280 --> 00:46:01,680
Speaker 1: that sounds like just like an energy drink here. Okay,

887
00:46:01,719 --> 00:46:06,799
Speaker 1: so yeah yeah, so um. But as I'm as I'm leaving,

888
00:46:06,960 --> 00:46:10,440
Speaker 1: oh this bathtub and you must see stuff like that

889
00:46:10,520 --> 00:46:12,720
Speaker 1: all the time. That's what I do love about cops,

890
00:46:12,719 --> 00:46:16,239
Speaker 1: as they seem very non judgmental of the surroundings when

891
00:46:16,360 --> 00:46:18,760
Speaker 1: when you were they're not going to judge your dirty car,

892
00:46:18,880 --> 00:46:20,920
Speaker 1: like they're just there to take care of a task,

893
00:46:21,000 --> 00:46:23,439
Speaker 1: even though unless you have a dildo on the shelf,

894
00:46:23,440 --> 00:46:27,040
Speaker 1: but go on, yeah, so yeah, we've seen you, name it,

895
00:46:27,080 --> 00:46:29,399
Speaker 1: we've seen it. But um, as I was leaving that call,

896
00:46:29,480 --> 00:46:31,480
Speaker 1: I go back out to my car and I had

897
00:46:31,480 --> 00:46:34,160
Speaker 1: parked on just the side of the road and the front,

898
00:46:34,200 --> 00:46:36,560
Speaker 1: the very front of my cruiser was just past a

899
00:46:36,640 --> 00:46:39,479
Speaker 1: sign that said no parking on this side. So about

900
00:46:39,480 --> 00:46:41,480
Speaker 1: a foot of my car was just past this sign.

901
00:46:41,520 --> 00:46:43,480
Speaker 1: So I'm walking out and there's this homeless guy walking

902
00:46:43,480 --> 00:46:45,920
Speaker 1: by and he's pointing at my car and I'm like, hey,

903
00:46:45,960 --> 00:46:48,000
Speaker 1: like just here for a policing And he looks at

904
00:46:48,040 --> 00:46:50,400
Speaker 1: me and he goes, you're a two dick mouth bitch.

905
00:46:52,680 --> 00:46:56,719
Speaker 1: A two dick mouth bitch. Yeah, yeah, does that mean

906
00:46:56,719 --> 00:46:59,200
Speaker 1: you have a big mouth that she could fit in

907
00:46:59,239 --> 00:47:01,160
Speaker 1: a two dick your mouth? And I'm looking at it

908
00:47:01,239 --> 00:47:08,120
Speaker 1: right now. It's it's beautiful. It's not says a lot

909
00:47:08,120 --> 00:47:11,919
Speaker 1: about that guy, but yeah, okay. And because of your car,

910
00:47:12,160 --> 00:47:19,600
Speaker 1: because you were breaking the rules that American cops break

911
00:47:19,640 --> 00:47:22,120
Speaker 1: the rules compared to you being a foot out, they'll

912
00:47:22,200 --> 00:47:25,160
Speaker 1: part the wrong way, take up the whole lane and

913
00:47:25,160 --> 00:47:28,040
Speaker 1: then it turned on their side just to get somewhere faster.

914
00:47:28,320 --> 00:47:30,680
Speaker 1: Oh yeah yeah. And they look at you like if

915
00:47:30,719 --> 00:47:33,760
Speaker 1: you if you have a problem with it, They're like

916
00:47:33,760 --> 00:47:37,520
Speaker 1: like testing you, like please bathing, have a taser right here.

917
00:47:37,840 --> 00:47:40,640
Speaker 1: I will say, though, I think, by and large, like

918
00:47:41,080 --> 00:47:44,840
Speaker 1: I don't think all cops are like like, I know

919
00:47:44,920 --> 00:47:46,279
Speaker 1: a lot of people that are cops that are like

920
00:47:46,440 --> 00:47:49,879
Speaker 1: good people, but there is something that you must see

921
00:47:49,880 --> 00:47:51,279
Speaker 1: on the force. And I will say this as a

922
00:47:51,320 --> 00:47:55,239
Speaker 1: female comic, male comics are different than female comics, Like you,

923
00:47:55,560 --> 00:47:58,520
Speaker 1: the reason you go into comedy as a man, we

924
00:47:58,560 --> 00:48:00,120
Speaker 1: have a lot of similarities and why we do it.

925
00:48:00,280 --> 00:48:02,800
Speaker 1: Our mothers didn't love us enough. We want we don't.

926
00:48:02,880 --> 00:48:05,799
Speaker 1: We have low self esteem. But there's there's you know,

927
00:48:06,000 --> 00:48:08,840
Speaker 1: there's a pussy incentive that men have that women don't like.

928
00:48:08,880 --> 00:48:11,000
Speaker 1: If you want to get a lot of dick comedy,

929
00:48:11,040 --> 00:48:13,920
Speaker 1: isn't why you should. That's not something that women go

930
00:48:13,960 --> 00:48:15,799
Speaker 1: into it for the dick. It just that would never

931
00:48:15,840 --> 00:48:19,560
Speaker 1: occur to us. Do you feel as a female cop

932
00:48:19,640 --> 00:48:23,440
Speaker 1: that you went into it differently, um, for different reasons

933
00:48:23,440 --> 00:48:25,560
Speaker 1: than the men? And do you often feel like a

934
00:48:25,560 --> 00:48:27,880
Speaker 1: lot of male cops can be ki and are trying

935
00:48:27,920 --> 00:48:31,759
Speaker 1: to like gain control of maybe this you know, I

936
00:48:31,800 --> 00:48:33,640
Speaker 1: love the Sarah Silverman joke. I don't know if you've

937
00:48:33,640 --> 00:48:35,680
Speaker 1: ever seen it on her show she gets pulled over

938
00:48:35,680 --> 00:48:37,080
Speaker 1: and he goes, ma'am, do you know why I pulled

939
00:48:37,120 --> 00:48:38,800
Speaker 1: you over today? And she goes, you got all season

940
00:48:38,960 --> 00:48:42,279
Speaker 1: high school? And I like that there's like this deficiency

941
00:48:42,360 --> 00:48:44,000
Speaker 1: that they're trying to make up for. Do you see

942
00:48:44,040 --> 00:48:46,239
Speaker 1: that there are there are there bad cops within your

943
00:48:46,280 --> 00:48:52,240
Speaker 1: force that you can go and name them. Yeah, there's

944
00:48:52,280 --> 00:48:54,960
Speaker 1: there's definitely that. I mean, it's it's like every job, right,

945
00:48:54,960 --> 00:48:59,000
Speaker 1: you're going to have bad teachers, lawyers, doctor so um.

946
00:48:59,040 --> 00:49:01,360
Speaker 1: But it's like in my notes for this, I literally

947
00:49:01,360 --> 00:49:05,080
Speaker 1: wrote like, cops are cut, Like there's so many that. Yeah,

948
00:49:05,120 --> 00:49:10,160
Speaker 1: it's like like the outfit and yes and yeah, and

949
00:49:10,160 --> 00:49:12,600
Speaker 1: you people like the dating apps are on their Instagram

950
00:49:12,680 --> 00:49:15,560
Speaker 1: with their their like uniform pictures and it is just

951
00:49:15,640 --> 00:49:20,879
Speaker 1: so cut, like it's like, oh my god, you was

952
00:49:21,280 --> 00:49:23,920
Speaker 1: um illegal. Sometimes like I feel like a lot of

953
00:49:23,960 --> 00:49:27,239
Speaker 1: times goodness will get you pulled over, like reving your

954
00:49:27,280 --> 00:49:31,040
Speaker 1: engine blasting loud music, like do you feel do you

955
00:49:31,080 --> 00:49:34,040
Speaker 1: wish you could write tickets for? There are some fines

956
00:49:34,160 --> 00:49:37,520
Speaker 1: that would be considered cut that have actual names like

957
00:49:37,840 --> 00:49:42,160
Speaker 1: unnecessary unnecessary noise from a vehicle, Um that way, yeah,

958
00:49:42,239 --> 00:49:45,040
Speaker 1: that's cut. Um. And then there's actually I don't know

959
00:49:45,080 --> 00:49:46,680
Speaker 1: if you guys have what the equivalent is, but we

960
00:49:46,719 --> 00:49:49,200
Speaker 1: have things called by laws here, so it's like each

961
00:49:49,360 --> 00:49:51,359
Speaker 1: region or city has its own kind of set of

962
00:49:51,400 --> 00:49:53,560
Speaker 1: like rules to live by, but they're not like actual

963
00:49:53,640 --> 00:49:56,880
Speaker 1: criminal offenses, so things like, um, we have we have

964
00:49:56,920 --> 00:49:59,120
Speaker 1: a by law that I love. It's called hooting and hollering,

965
00:49:59,400 --> 00:50:02,319
Speaker 1: so you can actually get a ticket of fine for

966
00:50:02,440 --> 00:50:08,560
Speaker 1: hooting and hollering. Oh my god, yeah, that kind of thing. Yeah,

967
00:50:09,040 --> 00:50:11,960
Speaker 1: but he's like, I wasn't hooting. I was wooting, Like

968
00:50:12,040 --> 00:50:14,920
Speaker 1: you know, like, what what makes it a hoot and holler?

969
00:50:17,040 --> 00:50:21,360
Speaker 1: I don't know, just waiting too much? Yeah, yeahs And

970
00:50:21,400 --> 00:50:24,080
Speaker 1: that should be the way, Like I'm so annoyed. That

971
00:50:24,200 --> 00:50:28,000
Speaker 1: is so when people it's often happens obviously with do

972
00:50:28,040 --> 00:50:31,160
Speaker 1: you Here's my question, how much of the time, when

973
00:50:31,200 --> 00:50:33,480
Speaker 1: you are ready writing tickets that are outside of like

974
00:50:33,560 --> 00:50:35,640
Speaker 1: let's say traffic, even though this is placed into it

975
00:50:35,800 --> 00:50:39,920
Speaker 1: where people are being getting in fights disorderly calls, how

976
00:50:40,000 --> 00:50:45,600
Speaker 1: much of the time are drugs and alcohol related to that? Liketh?

977
00:50:45,800 --> 00:50:48,319
Speaker 1: I honestly say, if people would stop drinking so much

978
00:50:48,320 --> 00:50:50,120
Speaker 1: and go to bed on time, we would not have

979
00:50:50,320 --> 00:50:52,920
Speaker 1: calls for services. Like That's what I say to people

980
00:50:52,960 --> 00:50:56,400
Speaker 1: in relationships who fight. I go, if you guys stop drinking,

981
00:50:57,239 --> 00:50:59,200
Speaker 1: it would just know you wouldn't have no more fights

982
00:50:59,280 --> 00:51:02,200
Speaker 1: or you the fight you have would be under control.

983
00:51:02,360 --> 00:51:06,719
Speaker 1: Drinking contributes and obviously drugs, but drinking I think is

984
00:51:06,760 --> 00:51:09,719
Speaker 1: the gateway drug to drugs, like drinking is what is

985
00:51:09,800 --> 00:51:14,200
Speaker 1: you know, legal and so and permissible? But like, so,

986
00:51:14,600 --> 00:51:19,200
Speaker 1: what when you pull over someone um and you your

987
00:51:19,200 --> 00:51:21,840
Speaker 1: first suspicion is probably always got to be this person's

988
00:51:21,880 --> 00:51:24,200
Speaker 1: maybe drunk because they made an error or like you could.

989
00:51:24,560 --> 00:51:27,160
Speaker 1: What are there signs that you can tell when someone's

990
00:51:27,239 --> 00:51:29,279
Speaker 1: driving that you are to look for when they're when

991
00:51:29,280 --> 00:51:31,239
Speaker 1: they're intoxicated? What are things that drunk people do when

992
00:51:31,239 --> 00:51:33,680
Speaker 1: they're driving the other people don't? And what's the funniest

993
00:51:33,760 --> 00:51:36,040
Speaker 1: encounter you ever had with a drunk driver? Because I'm

994
00:51:36,040 --> 00:51:38,920
Speaker 1: sure they've said some insane things to try to get

995
00:51:38,920 --> 00:51:42,080
Speaker 1: out of it. Yeah. So typically they're either trying to

996
00:51:42,160 --> 00:51:45,040
Speaker 1: drive perfectly, but like going way too slow and staying

997
00:51:45,080 --> 00:51:49,360
Speaker 1: at stop lights for way too long. Yes, the perfect

998
00:51:49,520 --> 00:51:51,759
Speaker 1: But I heard though that a lot of times really

999
00:51:51,840 --> 00:51:55,719
Speaker 1: drunk drivers they don't correct right away, Like that's more

1000
00:51:55,760 --> 00:51:58,319
Speaker 1: of a high driver or like a driver who is

1001
00:51:58,440 --> 00:52:00,760
Speaker 1: just like not paying attention, you know, and ten their phone.

1002
00:52:00,960 --> 00:52:04,480
Speaker 1: And drunk drivers are a little bit slower at their corrections.

1003
00:52:04,719 --> 00:52:07,759
Speaker 1: Is that a thing? Yeah, it's like bowl. It's like

1004
00:52:07,760 --> 00:52:09,680
Speaker 1: when you bowl with the bumpers up and it's just

1005
00:52:09,760 --> 00:52:14,400
Speaker 1: kind of right wow, And then their eyes don't you

1006
00:52:14,440 --> 00:52:16,480
Speaker 1: look at their eyes and like when you do the

1007
00:52:16,520 --> 00:52:21,000
Speaker 1: little scan with your finger, their eyes will tremble when

1008
00:52:21,040 --> 00:52:23,040
Speaker 1: they go side to side. If you're drunk, Yeah, it's

1009
00:52:23,040 --> 00:52:26,360
Speaker 1: called horizontal nous stagnus and their eyes. If you're a

1010
00:52:26,360 --> 00:52:29,160
Speaker 1: sober person, your eyes will track like wind shield wipers

1011
00:52:29,280 --> 00:52:32,439
Speaker 1: on a wet wind shield. If you're impaired, your eyes

1012
00:52:32,440 --> 00:52:35,360
Speaker 1: will track like wind shield wipers on a dry windshield.

1013
00:52:35,400 --> 00:52:38,080
Speaker 1: So they stagger. And it's it's very It's a fun

1014
00:52:38,120 --> 00:52:40,040
Speaker 1: party trick. You should try it with your drunk friends.

1015
00:52:40,080 --> 00:52:43,280
Speaker 1: What about what about marijuana? Does that make you windshield

1016
00:52:43,320 --> 00:52:47,040
Speaker 1: wipers stagger like or like? So any kind of impairment

1017
00:52:47,040 --> 00:52:50,640
Speaker 1: will make you do the little wobbly eyed thing. Yeah,

1018
00:52:50,640 --> 00:52:52,319
Speaker 1: and some cops will say the eyes don't lie, and

1019
00:52:52,360 --> 00:52:54,959
Speaker 1: I say that's we don't say that. Oh my god,

1020
00:52:54,960 --> 00:52:59,120
Speaker 1: it's so. What are some other things that you you go, Oh,

1021
00:52:59,640 --> 00:53:02,399
Speaker 1: this is someone I don't even have to I will

1022
00:53:02,440 --> 00:53:05,560
Speaker 1: do the roadside test because this person I don't maybe

1023
00:53:05,560 --> 00:53:07,680
Speaker 1: I don't smell alcohol, but this is a thing that

1024
00:53:07,800 --> 00:53:10,160
Speaker 1: drunk people do. Because I think it's so funny how

1025
00:53:10,400 --> 00:53:13,719
Speaker 1: often people give themselves away guilty people, maybe not even drunk,

1026
00:53:13,760 --> 00:53:19,919
Speaker 1: just guilty. Um. They're usually very put to answer and

1027
00:53:20,440 --> 00:53:23,239
Speaker 1: very very nervous. Um. A lot of the time we

1028
00:53:23,239 --> 00:53:25,839
Speaker 1: get drunk people coming out of like drive throughs, like

1029
00:53:25,920 --> 00:53:27,920
Speaker 1: going to McDonald's. That's what I was gonna say. Why

1030
00:53:27,920 --> 00:53:31,120
Speaker 1: don't you just hang out outside taco bells? He said,

1031
00:53:31,120 --> 00:53:38,600
Speaker 1: put a breathalyzer on the taco bell Sun out to

1032
00:53:38,600 --> 00:53:41,480
Speaker 1: Clayton Champagne for that joke. He's retired commic. But um,

1033
00:53:41,520 --> 00:53:45,080
Speaker 1: that's what we're going to finish up with you. What

1034
00:53:45,360 --> 00:53:47,040
Speaker 1: I want to know, and this is for my own

1035
00:53:47,360 --> 00:53:50,799
Speaker 1: peace of mind. What is something that you can tell

1036
00:53:50,840 --> 00:53:53,920
Speaker 1: people in dealing with cops that you would like advise people,

1037
00:53:53,960 --> 00:53:56,920
Speaker 1: like when you were twenty six and had never had

1038
00:53:56,960 --> 00:53:58,759
Speaker 1: anything to do with the force, that you would have

1039
00:53:58,800 --> 00:54:02,560
Speaker 1: like maybe benefited for knowing, maybe cop related or non

1040
00:54:02,560 --> 00:54:05,000
Speaker 1: comp related, Like something that you can tell the general

1041
00:54:05,080 --> 00:54:08,719
Speaker 1: public about what you know now. I would just say that, like,

1042
00:54:08,840 --> 00:54:13,160
Speaker 1: cops are normal people. They all have you know, families, dogs, friends,

1043
00:54:13,160 --> 00:54:15,840
Speaker 1: Like we're not robots, and if you just talk to

1044
00:54:15,960 --> 00:54:17,920
Speaker 1: us like humans, because this is how I am. When

1045
00:54:17,920 --> 00:54:19,600
Speaker 1: I pull someone over, if they're nice to me, I

1046
00:54:19,640 --> 00:54:21,319
Speaker 1: have a hard time giving them a ticket unless it's

1047
00:54:21,320 --> 00:54:23,959
Speaker 1: something very agree diserbla. I have a hard time given.

1048
00:54:24,000 --> 00:54:25,319
Speaker 1: If you're just nice to me, you say, oh, I'm

1049
00:54:25,360 --> 00:54:27,240
Speaker 1: so sorry, like I didn't mean to do that. I

1050
00:54:27,239 --> 00:54:29,719
Speaker 1: I'm sorry that I did that. If they're nice, I'm

1051
00:54:31,200 --> 00:54:34,719
Speaker 1: it does I love that nice person? I mean, I

1052
00:54:34,760 --> 00:54:38,000
Speaker 1: think that is so important. I think because I think

1053
00:54:38,040 --> 00:54:41,680
Speaker 1: so often people just get on the defense right away

1054
00:54:41,960 --> 00:54:43,960
Speaker 1: and they think cops are good because of the way

1055
00:54:44,000 --> 00:54:47,799
Speaker 1: you're portrayed in movies and also in America that we

1056
00:54:47,840 --> 00:54:49,480
Speaker 1: get on the defense right away. This person is going

1057
00:54:49,480 --> 00:54:50,879
Speaker 1: to be a dickt and a lot of times, let's

1058
00:54:50,920 --> 00:54:53,120
Speaker 1: be honest, they are. But I have gotten out of

1059
00:54:53,120 --> 00:54:58,080
Speaker 1: tickets before by just showing humility. Yeah, that's what I

1060
00:54:58,120 --> 00:55:02,759
Speaker 1: call my left tip. Humility and integrity. Um no, just

1061
00:55:02,880 --> 00:55:07,880
Speaker 1: humility and um regret and that that's my post. But

1062
00:55:07,960 --> 00:55:12,239
Speaker 1: I just showed just N'm like, oh my god, that

1063
00:55:12,320 --> 00:55:15,920
Speaker 1: was so dumb, and also being like you're whatever you're

1064
00:55:15,920 --> 00:55:18,600
Speaker 1: gonna do for me, it's probably right because this was

1065
00:55:18,680 --> 00:55:21,120
Speaker 1: dangerous and I needed to learn my lesson. I was

1066
00:55:21,160 --> 00:55:24,160
Speaker 1: in Mexico and I got pulled over by a cop.

1067
00:55:24,440 --> 00:55:27,919
Speaker 1: What's what's cop? And Spanish couple? So I got pulled

1068
00:55:27,960 --> 00:55:31,680
Speaker 1: over by policia and I will say that they because

1069
00:55:31,680 --> 00:55:34,200
Speaker 1: I was texting and driving, and I and he was right,

1070
00:55:34,320 --> 00:55:36,080
Speaker 1: you know, like I wanted to make the excuse of

1071
00:55:36,120 --> 00:55:38,360
Speaker 1: I was looking for directions, which I was, but still

1072
00:55:38,480 --> 00:55:42,080
Speaker 1: I was distracted. You so often is texting and driving

1073
00:55:42,080 --> 00:55:46,160
Speaker 1: illegal in Canada? Is it a by lague? Okay? Yeah, um,

1074
00:55:46,280 --> 00:55:49,160
Speaker 1: which it should be. It's isn't it Like don't you

1075
00:55:49,200 --> 00:55:51,319
Speaker 1: see it as like the number one thing with It's

1076
00:55:51,320 --> 00:55:54,200
Speaker 1: like driving at this point. It super distracting and people

1077
00:55:54,200 --> 00:55:57,239
Speaker 1: don't realize that or how long they've been. They don't

1078
00:55:57,280 --> 00:55:59,360
Speaker 1: know how long they look down and you know that

1079
00:55:59,400 --> 00:56:01,160
Speaker 1: you're one of these people that is, look, I've done

1080
00:56:01,200 --> 00:56:02,680
Speaker 1: it before where I look up and I go, I

1081
00:56:02,680 --> 00:56:05,680
Speaker 1: don't know how long that was. That's not a good sign. Anyway,

1082
00:56:05,719 --> 00:56:08,920
Speaker 1: the guy pulled me over and I said to him,

1083
00:56:08,920 --> 00:56:11,560
Speaker 1: I was like, you're right, like I whatever you want

1084
00:56:11,560 --> 00:56:14,120
Speaker 1: to give me, like I need to pay the fine.

1085
00:56:14,160 --> 00:56:16,000
Speaker 1: I need to learn my lesson. Like this was a

1086
00:56:16,040 --> 00:56:18,440
Speaker 1: wake up call because I like getting caught for things

1087
00:56:18,480 --> 00:56:21,120
Speaker 1: before they get worse, Like when I got caught shoplifting,

1088
00:56:21,160 --> 00:56:22,840
Speaker 1: I was like, I will never do this again. This

1089
00:56:22,920 --> 00:56:24,680
Speaker 1: is so humiliating. I would have kept going if I

1090
00:56:24,719 --> 00:56:28,320
Speaker 1: hadn't have got caught. So it's important to be fine

1091
00:56:28,360 --> 00:56:30,719
Speaker 1: and penalized for things. But he goes, you know it's

1092
00:56:30,719 --> 00:56:33,160
Speaker 1: gonna be it was four hundred dollars and whatever. I

1093
00:56:33,400 --> 00:56:35,400
Speaker 1: already forget what paces are, but it was four dars

1094
00:56:35,440 --> 00:56:40,279
Speaker 1: American and he needed cash, which is suspicious, but you

1095
00:56:40,320 --> 00:56:43,719
Speaker 1: know policia. And I was like, I don't have it.

1096
00:56:43,800 --> 00:56:46,120
Speaker 1: I have like twenty dollars cash on me and he

1097
00:56:46,160 --> 00:56:48,200
Speaker 1: was like, okay, well then i'll take your I D

1098
00:56:49,080 --> 00:56:52,480
Speaker 1: and um, and you need to go pay tomorrow to

1099
00:56:52,520 --> 00:56:54,160
Speaker 1: get the I D back. I was leaving the next

1100
00:56:54,239 --> 00:56:56,319
Speaker 1: day and he was like, and if you pay to borrow,

1101
00:56:56,320 --> 00:57:00,480
Speaker 1: it's going to be six dollars American. And I realized

1102
00:57:00,480 --> 00:57:03,600
Speaker 1: in that moment I have two driver's licenses because I

1103
00:57:03,640 --> 00:57:06,600
Speaker 1: got I lost one and then uh, someone found the

1104
00:57:06,600 --> 00:57:08,520
Speaker 1: one I had lost and returned it, so I had

1105
00:57:08,520 --> 00:57:11,000
Speaker 1: to and I was like, oh, I'll just let him

1106
00:57:11,000 --> 00:57:13,560
Speaker 1: take it, like I don't care that four. But then

1107
00:57:13,600 --> 00:57:16,600
Speaker 1: I thought they might give this that might be in

1108
00:57:16,640 --> 00:57:18,160
Speaker 1: some record. And then the next time I go go

1109
00:57:18,200 --> 00:57:19,960
Speaker 1: through customs, it's gonna be a crazy thing. And they're

1110
00:57:19,960 --> 00:57:21,560
Speaker 1: gonna have to get someone else to host a girl

1111
00:57:21,640 --> 00:57:24,320
Speaker 1: island or f why island whatever we f person island

1112
00:57:24,640 --> 00:57:27,800
Speaker 1: and so um. I ended up paying it, but I

1113
00:57:27,800 --> 00:57:31,640
Speaker 1: paid him cash hand to hand. No, no right up

1114
00:57:31,640 --> 00:57:34,040
Speaker 1: of it. But you don't that's where you go. They

1115
00:57:34,040 --> 00:57:36,600
Speaker 1: can do anything. And I do find that when I've

1116
00:57:36,640 --> 00:57:40,680
Speaker 1: been cuffed before by cops, it is the worst feeling

1117
00:57:40,720 --> 00:57:42,600
Speaker 1: in the world, which I'm sure you know that. You

1118
00:57:42,640 --> 00:57:45,920
Speaker 1: give people that feeling where something changes when they get cuffed,

1119
00:57:45,920 --> 00:57:48,800
Speaker 1: where you know you have no you don't know what's

1120
00:57:48,800 --> 00:57:50,720
Speaker 1: gonna happen to you, You have no rights, you are

1121
00:57:50,920 --> 00:57:55,680
Speaker 1: not You do have rights, obviously, but you just feel so.

1122
00:57:55,800 --> 00:57:58,000
Speaker 1: Have you ever been arrested, I mean clearly probably not

1123
00:57:58,120 --> 00:58:01,640
Speaker 1: right M I've never No, I've never been arrested. Yeah.

1124
00:58:01,680 --> 00:58:03,440
Speaker 1: Would they let you in the force if you had been,

1125
00:58:04,480 --> 00:58:06,240
Speaker 1: I don't know, I've heard of it. Don't even let

1126
00:58:06,240 --> 00:58:09,919
Speaker 1: you if you've been arrested for anything. Yeah. I think

1127
00:58:10,040 --> 00:58:12,360
Speaker 1: people have maybe been arrested, but have like talked about

1128
00:58:12,400 --> 00:58:15,000
Speaker 1: and been honest about it, and maybe they've changed because

1129
00:58:15,040 --> 00:58:16,280
Speaker 1: I don't think it's a bad thing people. I mean

1130
00:58:16,280 --> 00:58:18,320
Speaker 1: people can change. People make mistakes, people fuck up, and

1131
00:58:18,360 --> 00:58:20,880
Speaker 1: it brings a different dynamic to the job. So could

1132
00:58:20,960 --> 00:58:23,160
Speaker 1: I be a cop at thirties? I'm about to be

1133
00:58:23,200 --> 00:58:26,640
Speaker 1: thirty eight in like a week. If I decided right now, like,

1134
00:58:26,680 --> 00:58:29,640
Speaker 1: let's say I'm a Canadian, could I you think be

1135
00:58:29,720 --> 00:58:31,360
Speaker 1: a cop? Can you become a cop at thirty eight?

1136
00:58:31,400 --> 00:58:33,960
Speaker 1: And let's say I have no? Yeah, I had a Yeah.

1137
00:58:33,960 --> 00:58:35,760
Speaker 1: I had a classmate at police college who was in

1138
00:58:35,800 --> 00:58:40,240
Speaker 1: her forties. Really yeah, Oh my gosh, that's cool. And

1139
00:58:40,280 --> 00:58:41,920
Speaker 1: you know what's cool is that you decided to do

1140
00:58:42,000 --> 00:58:43,760
Speaker 1: something you were already a teacher. What did you teach?

1141
00:58:44,360 --> 00:58:48,680
Speaker 1: I taught elementary school? Okay, what did you teach? Um?

1142
00:58:48,720 --> 00:58:51,000
Speaker 1: My last job I was teaching. I covered prep, so

1143
00:58:51,000 --> 00:58:54,440
Speaker 1: I taught like all the fun born subject like music, art,

1144
00:58:54,440 --> 00:58:56,800
Speaker 1: all that stuff. What made you go? No, no, no?

1145
00:58:57,000 --> 00:58:59,680
Speaker 1: The said for me, I just wasn't like satisfied. Fully.

1146
00:59:00,360 --> 00:59:02,480
Speaker 1: Is it easier for a kid to be quiet when

1147
00:59:02,480 --> 00:59:07,440
Speaker 1: you have a gun? It's probably like if I just

1148
00:59:07,480 --> 00:59:11,080
Speaker 1: had a gun. I'm sure there is a cut off

1149
00:59:11,120 --> 00:59:13,080
Speaker 1: of age to become a police officer, but I think

1150
00:59:13,120 --> 00:59:15,680
Speaker 1: a lot of people think, like seven, oh, I'm not

1151
00:59:15,720 --> 00:59:17,600
Speaker 1: going to have a career change. I think there's a

1152
00:59:17,600 --> 00:59:20,760
Speaker 1: lot of young like really young cops. Then I think

1153
00:59:20,800 --> 00:59:23,400
Speaker 1: that can be a problem because they're too young to

1154
00:59:23,520 --> 00:59:27,840
Speaker 1: really understand people. Brain doesn't even finish developing until six

1155
00:59:27,960 --> 00:59:33,320
Speaker 1: or something. So we have some young cops and yeah,

1156
00:59:33,440 --> 00:59:36,440
Speaker 1: I shake mind, especially with how these young generations are now.

1157
00:59:36,480 --> 00:59:40,880
Speaker 1: I hate to sound old, but it's problematic. What's the

1158
00:59:40,880 --> 00:59:43,560
Speaker 1: biggest thing that you look at that you go, okay,

1159
00:59:43,600 --> 00:59:46,960
Speaker 1: these are these kids are different than they're just they're

1160
00:59:47,040 --> 00:59:49,640
Speaker 1: entitled and they don't understand discipline. They don't have discipline

1161
00:59:49,640 --> 00:59:51,640
Speaker 1: because they just get everything handed to them. That's a

1162
00:59:51,840 --> 00:59:54,560
Speaker 1: that's the thing. Even in Canada, people aren't disciplining their

1163
00:59:54,680 --> 00:59:58,440
Speaker 1: kids and they're not getting disciplined in school because teachers

1164
00:59:58,680 --> 01:00:02,080
Speaker 1: can't discipline because arrants get angry at the teachers if

1165
01:00:02,120 --> 01:00:05,440
Speaker 1: they It's so bizarre. Anyway, that's another subject for another time.

1166
01:00:05,720 --> 01:00:09,040
Speaker 1: And thank you so much for talking to us from Canada.

1167
01:00:09,080 --> 01:00:10,680
Speaker 1: Thank you for being a bestie, thank you for coming

1168
01:00:10,680 --> 01:00:14,560
Speaker 1: to our shows. We'll see you in Toronto right um.

1169
01:00:14,600 --> 01:00:16,840
Speaker 1: I cannot wait to meet you again. We met you

1170
01:00:16,840 --> 01:00:18,920
Speaker 1: in Vegas already and you brought me smarties, which is

1171
01:00:18,960 --> 01:00:21,840
Speaker 1: my favorite Canadian treat. The only thing I maybe given

1172
01:00:21,840 --> 01:00:24,480
Speaker 1: to my uh, you know, I can't even because they're vegan,

1173
01:00:24,520 --> 01:00:27,600
Speaker 1: but they're the best. They're they're big eminem. They're big

1174
01:00:27,600 --> 01:00:31,840
Speaker 1: Canadian eminem. They're not like the American Smarties. They have

1175
01:00:31,880 --> 01:00:35,440
Speaker 1: like a yes, they have a crispy like a harder

1176
01:00:35,600 --> 01:00:39,320
Speaker 1: outer shell. Amost and this brings me to my point

1177
01:00:39,520 --> 01:00:43,040
Speaker 1: talking to besties about Smarties. Now, I'm just kidda, thank you,

1178
01:00:43,280 --> 01:00:45,640
Speaker 1: m we uh, thank you for being in our first

1179
01:00:45,680 --> 01:00:51,720
Speaker 1: episode or our first segment of guesties as bestiest. I

1180
01:00:51,880 --> 01:00:55,720
Speaker 1: am thank you. I wanted to say, like the looha

1181
01:00:55,800 --> 01:01:05,880
Speaker 1: of Canada, which is there anything that you say that's sorry? Here? Sorry,

1182
01:01:06,200 --> 01:01:09,120
Speaker 1: we say yeah, we say cheers a lot, cheers, cheers

1183
01:01:11,120 --> 01:01:15,880
Speaker 1: all right, bye girl bye, thank you. It took out

1184
01:01:15,960 --> 01:01:17,680
Speaker 1: a second to get off zoom, and I just want

1185
01:01:17,680 --> 01:01:21,120
Speaker 1: to say it. I made this joke on Conan of

1186
01:01:21,200 --> 01:01:23,720
Speaker 1: where you go from leaving a meeting to then the

1187
01:01:23,800 --> 01:01:25,960
Speaker 1: screen comes up again leave meeting, and it leaves you

1188
01:01:26,040 --> 01:01:29,960
Speaker 1: this weird blank space. I am so trained now to

1189
01:01:30,120 --> 01:01:33,160
Speaker 1: keep my smile on the entire time I do it.

1190
01:01:33,520 --> 01:01:36,320
Speaker 1: I've done so much press for this. Welcome to Niki

1191
01:01:36,360 --> 01:01:38,520
Speaker 1: lays a question mark on e exclamation points. Does it

1192
01:01:38,920 --> 01:01:45,480
Speaker 1: to nine Central, but I go bye, guys. And the

1193
01:01:45,520 --> 01:01:48,120
Speaker 1: other day I did Caitlin Bristow's podcast and I did

1194
01:01:48,160 --> 01:01:51,280
Speaker 1: a recording on my computer like for audio for backup

1195
01:01:51,320 --> 01:01:54,560
Speaker 1: just in case, and that interviews out now by the way,

1196
01:01:54,600 --> 01:01:57,200
Speaker 1: No it's not yet, I don't think anyway. Um, And

1197
01:01:57,240 --> 01:01:59,240
Speaker 1: the recording kept going after it said good bye to

1198
01:01:59,280 --> 01:02:02,040
Speaker 1: them off zoom, and I knew it was still recording,

1199
01:02:02,640 --> 01:02:06,040
Speaker 1: and I I kept just talking like it was like,

1200
01:02:06,080 --> 01:02:08,160
Speaker 1: I was like, that was fun, like I invade it

1201
01:02:08,160 --> 01:02:10,000
Speaker 1: sound like because I knew that they might catch me

1202
01:02:10,000 --> 01:02:12,520
Speaker 1: saying something a little different or like just it's so

1203
01:02:12,600 --> 01:02:15,800
Speaker 1: insulting though when someone is like so enthusiastic and then

1204
01:02:15,840 --> 01:02:19,280
Speaker 1: immediately dead face. I got the best text from Caitlin

1205
01:02:19,320 --> 01:02:23,840
Speaker 1: though yesterday, Um that said uh because I went on

1206
01:02:23,880 --> 01:02:27,080
Speaker 1: her podcast. Noah, you'll love this, Caitlin Bristow wrote me

1207
01:02:27,160 --> 01:02:31,200
Speaker 1: yesterday out of the blue, which, yeah, I know, what

1208
01:02:31,240 --> 01:02:33,040
Speaker 1: did you say to her? It was so funny. I

1209
01:02:33,080 --> 01:02:35,320
Speaker 1: forget exactly, but it was like, what's it like? Nicky

1210
01:02:35,360 --> 01:02:38,040
Speaker 1: got last What's it like to say? Um? Or no,

1211
01:02:38,240 --> 01:02:40,320
Speaker 1: Nikki says she got first voted off What's it like

1212
01:02:40,400 --> 01:02:44,680
Speaker 1: to say the first part of she wrote what is

1213
01:02:44,680 --> 01:02:46,640
Speaker 1: the book that you told me about on the podcast?

1214
01:02:47,280 --> 01:02:49,480
Speaker 1: And I wrote getting Too I Do by Pat Alan

1215
01:02:49,520 --> 01:02:51,200
Speaker 1: and she was like, yes, ha ha, the book lives

1216
01:02:51,240 --> 01:02:53,720
Speaker 1: on talking with my girlfriend. I'm going to get so

1217
01:02:53,760 --> 01:02:59,200
Speaker 1: many girls into that book. Final thought, Yeah, I think

1218
01:02:59,240 --> 01:03:03,080
Speaker 1: so yeah. I. Um, I've talked about getting to I

1219
01:03:03,160 --> 01:03:07,600
Speaker 1: Do so much obviously um on this podcast on the

1220
01:03:07,680 --> 01:03:13,160
Speaker 1: up podcast. Uh. It permeates my life and is something

1221
01:03:13,160 --> 01:03:15,520
Speaker 1: that I think as many so so many valuable lessons.

1222
01:03:15,520 --> 01:03:20,160
Speaker 1: And I also was editing my special yesterday and um,

1223
01:03:20,320 --> 01:03:23,760
Speaker 1: we're not editing it making sure it was color corrected properly, um,

1224
01:03:23,800 --> 01:03:26,800
Speaker 1: which it was. I got my friend's um husband to

1225
01:03:26,840 --> 01:03:30,520
Speaker 1: do it. He does like you know, so many He's

1226
01:03:30,560 --> 01:03:32,640
Speaker 1: done so many people's specials, and I'm so I got

1227
01:03:32,720 --> 01:03:34,120
Speaker 1: him a like such a good rate and he's so

1228
01:03:34,200 --> 01:03:37,400
Speaker 1: nice to do it. Anyway, I saw the color correction

1229
01:03:37,440 --> 01:03:39,840
Speaker 1: looked beautiful, but I'm like, can you make me a

1230
01:03:39,920 --> 01:03:42,520
Speaker 1: little bit more orange? And I'm like, I know no

1231
01:03:42,560 --> 01:03:44,640
Speaker 1: one wants that, no one would ever want that, but

1232
01:03:44,840 --> 01:03:48,120
Speaker 1: glaze dog do. Um. But I was watching the special,

1233
01:03:48,160 --> 01:03:51,480
Speaker 1: which took me forever to do editing. It was hard

1234
01:03:51,600 --> 01:03:53,720
Speaker 1: enough and now it's already edited, so I can't make

1235
01:03:53,760 --> 01:03:55,680
Speaker 1: any more edit changes. This was just about listening to

1236
01:03:55,720 --> 01:03:58,600
Speaker 1: the sound and listening to and we're looking at the

1237
01:03:58,640 --> 01:04:03,200
Speaker 1: color come down. When I can't say, they're they're forcing

1238
01:04:03,240 --> 01:04:04,959
Speaker 1: me to get this done so that they can start

1239
01:04:04,960 --> 01:04:07,760
Speaker 1: putting together question the ad campaign. But the summer this

1240
01:04:07,800 --> 01:04:12,000
Speaker 1: summer and um, I will say. I wrote to Chris

1241
01:04:12,120 --> 01:04:14,360
Speaker 1: because I was like, I can't watch this, um dreading

1242
01:04:14,400 --> 01:04:17,959
Speaker 1: watching it. You know, it's it's been since I think

1243
01:04:18,120 --> 01:04:21,040
Speaker 1: March or no, no like February that I turned it

1244
01:04:21,080 --> 01:04:24,160
Speaker 1: in finally and stop making making edits to it, even

1245
01:04:24,160 --> 01:04:27,840
Speaker 1: though I made a million edits. Um. I said to Chris,

1246
01:04:28,840 --> 01:04:31,600
Speaker 1: this is so good, and I will never let myself

1247
01:04:31,640 --> 01:04:34,160
Speaker 1: say it's not. It is really good. I'm really proud

1248
01:04:34,200 --> 01:04:37,040
Speaker 1: of it, I will say, though, And I think I'm

1249
01:04:37,040 --> 01:04:40,080
Speaker 1: wondering if I should admit this in the press that

1250
01:04:40,120 --> 01:04:42,479
Speaker 1: I do for it. There is a there's a dead

1251
01:04:42,520 --> 01:04:45,280
Speaker 1: spot in the middle. There's a middle part where I

1252
01:04:45,320 --> 01:04:46,760
Speaker 1: get into the book and I have to set up

1253
01:04:46,800 --> 01:04:49,160
Speaker 1: the book to get us into some more things. And

1254
01:04:49,160 --> 01:04:54,240
Speaker 1: I am proselytizing, no, the I'm to get into a

1255
01:04:54,280 --> 01:04:56,160
Speaker 1: series of jokes based on the book. I have to

1256
01:04:56,200 --> 01:04:59,440
Speaker 1: set up. I didn't have enough. I look back and

1257
01:04:59,440 --> 01:05:01,560
Speaker 1: I go, there is a dead spot. Now. I want

1258
01:05:01,600 --> 01:05:04,920
Speaker 1: to just say that does not negate watching the special.

1259
01:05:05,280 --> 01:05:07,000
Speaker 1: You watch a lot of things that have dead spots

1260
01:05:07,040 --> 01:05:09,960
Speaker 1: that aren't making you laugh the entire time. I contain multitudes.

1261
01:05:10,040 --> 01:05:12,200
Speaker 1: I can just have us. It's okay to have a

1262
01:05:12,240 --> 01:05:14,560
Speaker 1: section of stand up for about a minute and twenty

1263
01:05:14,600 --> 01:05:18,640
Speaker 1: seconds where it is just me, rapid fire, like explaining something.

1264
01:05:18,720 --> 01:05:20,760
Speaker 1: It's allowed. You're allowed to just be interesting and not

1265
01:05:20,800 --> 01:05:26,800
Speaker 1: like boom time. Um. I wonder though, like there are

1266
01:05:26,800 --> 01:05:28,320
Speaker 1: things I look back on that I'm like, why did

1267
01:05:28,400 --> 01:05:31,560
Speaker 1: you say? Like, is it okay as someone who is

1268
01:05:31,680 --> 01:05:35,080
Speaker 1: presenting something to the world to say I love this.

1269
01:05:35,200 --> 01:05:37,600
Speaker 1: I think there's a lot of great stuff in here it.

1270
01:05:38,760 --> 01:05:41,360
Speaker 1: I do think that it could have been better. I

1271
01:05:41,400 --> 01:05:44,760
Speaker 1: am better than this, and I don't want this. If

1272
01:05:44,760 --> 01:05:46,760
Speaker 1: this were the last thing I was judged upon, I

1273
01:05:46,800 --> 01:05:49,480
Speaker 1: would feel no. Actually I would feel okay about that.

1274
01:05:49,720 --> 01:05:52,920
Speaker 1: But I know you shouldn't judge me based on this

1275
01:05:53,040 --> 01:05:54,920
Speaker 1: for my entire career. Like, if you don't like this,

1276
01:05:55,040 --> 01:05:58,440
Speaker 1: don't turn off Taylor, so me talking about what do

1277
01:05:58,440 --> 01:06:04,520
Speaker 1: you mean? She said, like, yeah, this right? We are

1278
01:06:04,600 --> 01:06:09,040
Speaker 1: so many things all the time she was talking about that,

1279
01:06:09,080 --> 01:06:10,720
Speaker 1: she was talking about being a writer, and she goes,

1280
01:06:10,960 --> 01:06:13,320
Speaker 1: you write differently on your Instagram stories than you do

1281
01:06:13,520 --> 01:06:15,480
Speaker 1: in your diary. Then you do it an email with

1282
01:06:15,560 --> 01:06:17,720
Speaker 1: friends than you do in a caption on an Instagram

1283
01:06:17,760 --> 01:06:20,160
Speaker 1: story about a Mother's Day post like every you are

1284
01:06:20,280 --> 01:06:23,480
Speaker 1: multitudes like me, And this special was a slice of

1285
01:06:23,520 --> 01:06:26,800
Speaker 1: my life. At the end of me, I was doing

1286
01:06:26,840 --> 01:06:29,880
Speaker 1: my I was recording the reality show that you guys

1287
01:06:29,960 --> 01:06:33,400
Speaker 1: are now seeing that was I shot the special November

1288
01:06:35,760 --> 01:06:38,560
Speaker 1: well kind of well post quarantine kind of for me,

1289
01:06:38,680 --> 01:06:41,720
Speaker 1: the special was post I don't have any time in

1290
01:06:41,760 --> 01:06:44,920
Speaker 1: my life to do anything except like I didn't have

1291
01:06:44,920 --> 01:06:46,800
Speaker 1: time to look over these jokes. I didn't have. I

1292
01:06:46,800 --> 01:06:48,600
Speaker 1: didn't have the proper amount of time I want to

1293
01:06:48,600 --> 01:06:51,680
Speaker 1: prepare for the special, But um, that does not mean

1294
01:06:51,720 --> 01:06:53,680
Speaker 1: it's not great. Like there's you know, my special on

1295
01:06:53,720 --> 01:06:57,400
Speaker 1: Netflix and Degenerates, which Andrew think fucking God was therefore

1296
01:06:57,560 --> 01:06:59,320
Speaker 1: and brought me my dress when I had forgotten in

1297
01:06:59,440 --> 01:07:01,200
Speaker 1: l A and got to be there for it. That

1298
01:07:01,360 --> 01:07:04,640
Speaker 1: set was insane. That was falling on a time in

1299
01:07:04,680 --> 01:07:08,240
Speaker 1: my life where I was going off the rails, like

1300
01:07:08,400 --> 01:07:11,640
Speaker 1: the did night before suicidally like crying, throwing myself on

1301
01:07:11,680 --> 01:07:14,840
Speaker 1: the floor. That's special. The next night, I am insane,

1302
01:07:14,840 --> 01:07:17,240
Speaker 1: but it's fun. It's a different energy to it. My

1303
01:07:17,360 --> 01:07:21,720
Speaker 1: perfect special was me so sober toned down, working so

1304
01:07:21,760 --> 01:07:24,000
Speaker 1: hard on every little joke had to be perfect, Like

1305
01:07:24,200 --> 01:07:28,360
Speaker 1: these are different, you know a little um and I

1306
01:07:28,400 --> 01:07:31,160
Speaker 1: just wonder though you always have to act like everything

1307
01:07:31,160 --> 01:07:33,000
Speaker 1: you put out when you're promoting it is the best

1308
01:07:33,040 --> 01:07:36,560
Speaker 1: thing you've ever seen, and I'm soap, like I'm proud

1309
01:07:36,560 --> 01:07:39,160
Speaker 1: of this special, but I want to just talk about

1310
01:07:39,200 --> 01:07:43,000
Speaker 1: and be honest about, like this special, um is not

1311
01:07:43,200 --> 01:07:45,840
Speaker 1: what I is, not exactly what I wanted it to be,

1312
01:07:46,000 --> 01:07:50,360
Speaker 1: But that doesn't mean that it's bad. And that is

1313
01:07:50,440 --> 01:07:55,280
Speaker 1: I think you're you're the artist. You don't necessarily want

1314
01:07:55,360 --> 01:08:00,080
Speaker 1: to um stir the narrative of what how people are

1315
01:08:00,080 --> 01:08:03,480
Speaker 1: gonna because if I go, hey, look at this picture, dude,

1316
01:08:03,480 --> 01:08:07,640
Speaker 1: I look like dogshit, even if you don't, I'm just

1317
01:08:07,640 --> 01:08:11,080
Speaker 1: trying to get ahead of people. Comedy Subreddit going like

1318
01:08:11,680 --> 01:08:17,120
Speaker 1: what it's I'm not subscribing to stand up comedy from

1319
01:08:17,120 --> 01:08:18,800
Speaker 1: from Reddit as soon as my special comes out, and

1320
01:08:18,800 --> 01:08:21,679
Speaker 1: I'll subscribe again in like a year when people maybe

1321
01:08:21,680 --> 01:08:24,840
Speaker 1: have forgotten about my special. But yeah, I just know.

1322
01:08:25,479 --> 01:08:27,439
Speaker 1: I know what I'm capable of as a comedian, and

1323
01:08:27,479 --> 01:08:31,320
Speaker 1: this is me doing something that I think honestly, I

1324
01:08:31,360 --> 01:08:34,719
Speaker 1: say it in the special, but I hope young girls

1325
01:08:35,320 --> 01:08:38,320
Speaker 1: find this. It's almost like the show Real Sex was

1326
01:08:38,360 --> 01:08:39,920
Speaker 1: to me when I was growing up, where I was like,

1327
01:08:40,200 --> 01:08:42,200
Speaker 1: I know this is naughty, I shouldn't be watching it,

1328
01:08:42,520 --> 01:08:45,120
Speaker 1: but I learned some stuff or taxi cab confessions, like

1329
01:08:45,120 --> 01:08:48,160
Speaker 1: I learned things about human nature that when you sneak

1330
01:08:48,320 --> 01:08:50,720
Speaker 1: r rated things you learn. And this is something that

1331
01:08:50,800 --> 01:08:54,840
Speaker 1: I genuinely hope children sneak because I'm not doing any harm.

1332
01:08:55,120 --> 01:08:57,880
Speaker 1: I'm not encouraging women to do anything that would not

1333
01:08:57,960 --> 01:09:01,160
Speaker 1: make them uh Like, I'm talking about sex in a

1334
01:09:01,200 --> 01:09:04,639
Speaker 1: real way, like I wish I'm gonna I might do

1335
01:09:04,760 --> 01:09:06,720
Speaker 1: this have this as a running theme. But I think

1336
01:09:06,720 --> 01:09:08,519
Speaker 1: for my next special it would be fun to call it,

1337
01:09:08,680 --> 01:09:13,880
Speaker 1: um uh I, well my next special. Actually I'm trying.

1338
01:09:14,040 --> 01:09:15,840
Speaker 1: I think I might maybe not my next one. My

1339
01:09:15,920 --> 01:09:19,240
Speaker 1: next next one, I'm gonna do all clean material and

1340
01:09:19,320 --> 01:09:22,840
Speaker 1: just call it see. I like that, And I'm not

1341
01:09:22,920 --> 01:09:24,599
Speaker 1: really going to call it see because that sounds too

1342
01:09:24,640 --> 01:09:28,479
Speaker 1: like but like really like but no, but just like

1343
01:09:28,720 --> 01:09:30,680
Speaker 1: I get it, you can clean stuff. Here you go,

1344
01:09:30,800 --> 01:09:33,639
Speaker 1: motherfucker's that's what it's gonna be called. There's no uh,

1345
01:09:35,040 --> 01:09:37,479
Speaker 1: it's not even for my mom. It's really like, it's

1346
01:09:37,520 --> 01:09:40,759
Speaker 1: for people who think I'm not capable. I've already started writing.

1347
01:09:40,800 --> 01:09:43,639
Speaker 1: Every day I write a clean joke about just like

1348
01:09:43,880 --> 01:09:46,719
Speaker 1: a thing, you know, like that. Yesterday was like people

1349
01:09:46,760 --> 01:09:48,840
Speaker 1: giving me plants as gifts, Like, I mean, I'm just

1350
01:09:48,840 --> 01:09:51,200
Speaker 1: gonna write about that, like I'm gonna I'm consuming gaff again,

1351
01:09:51,280 --> 01:09:53,880
Speaker 1: I'm consuming Nate Bargatzi. I'm consuming all these clean comics

1352
01:09:53,920 --> 01:09:56,679
Speaker 1: who I really look up to and realize like, oh

1353
01:09:56,720 --> 01:09:58,840
Speaker 1: I can do I can do this. Why am I

1354
01:09:59,000 --> 01:10:00,880
Speaker 1: The reason I'm not? I mean, talk about it in

1355
01:10:00,880 --> 01:10:02,880
Speaker 1: my special. The reason I talk about dirty things is

1356
01:10:02,880 --> 01:10:05,639
Speaker 1: because that's what's interesting to me and and the other

1357
01:10:05,640 --> 01:10:09,120
Speaker 1: stuff isn't. But I like to Chris gave me the idea.

1358
01:10:09,160 --> 01:10:11,120
Speaker 1: I mean, he wants me to do an all topless special,

1359
01:10:11,200 --> 01:10:12,880
Speaker 1: so he's all over the place. Wouldn't be funny to

1360
01:10:12,920 --> 01:10:14,679
Speaker 1: do a topless special, and it would be my clean

1361
01:10:14,680 --> 01:10:19,519
Speaker 1: one that is funny. Sis are going to be great

1362
01:10:19,520 --> 01:10:21,679
Speaker 1: forever and you'll finally get to see my favorite lip color.

1363
01:10:22,400 --> 01:10:28,200
Speaker 1: I think like the whole idea of clean dirty is

1364
01:10:28,320 --> 01:10:31,000
Speaker 1: just like, even if you write a clean joke, it

1365
01:10:31,040 --> 01:10:35,120
Speaker 1: could come from your darkest, most twisted brain. And that's

1366
01:10:35,280 --> 01:10:38,280
Speaker 1: and that's you know, that's all it's about. You know,

1367
01:10:38,360 --> 01:10:43,800
Speaker 1: that's what we find. There's a guy on I follow.

1368
01:10:44,280 --> 01:10:46,160
Speaker 1: He's he's the best guy to teach you guitar on

1369
01:10:46,200 --> 01:10:49,360
Speaker 1: YouTube based on everyone's recommendation. His name is Justin Guitar,

1370
01:10:49,880 --> 01:10:52,800
Speaker 1: and he started learning guitar left handed so that he

1371
01:10:52,840 --> 01:10:57,879
Speaker 1: could experience difficulty again and like relate to his students

1372
01:10:57,880 --> 01:11:00,360
Speaker 1: that are struggling holding the pick. And so he talks

1373
01:11:00,400 --> 01:11:03,280
Speaker 1: about constantly his left handed guitar experience, which is just

1374
01:11:03,360 --> 01:11:06,240
Speaker 1: like what and he's an amazing accomplished guitarist on the

1375
01:11:06,320 --> 01:11:08,840
Speaker 1: right hand, but he's doing it the other way to learn.

1376
01:11:09,080 --> 01:11:13,280
Speaker 1: And I feel like, for me, clean comedy is left

1377
01:11:13,280 --> 01:11:17,640
Speaker 1: handed guitar. It's like, I'm I'm a master at what

1378
01:11:17,880 --> 01:11:19,920
Speaker 1: seemingly you would be able to put into it, but

1379
01:11:20,000 --> 01:11:23,360
Speaker 1: I I've just never I've never done it before. What's

1380
01:11:23,400 --> 01:11:25,599
Speaker 1: hard for me too, is like I'll do a set

1381
01:11:25,720 --> 01:11:27,960
Speaker 1: and I'll have you know, two or three clean jokes

1382
01:11:28,040 --> 01:11:30,559
Speaker 1: and they'll they'll go well, and then you get that

1383
01:11:30,640 --> 01:11:34,160
Speaker 1: pop on a joke because I just think it's funnier too.

1384
01:11:34,240 --> 01:11:37,439
Speaker 1: And because they love stuff, especially if you've given them

1385
01:11:37,439 --> 01:11:40,599
Speaker 1: like clean hard. It's hard, you know. That's why peppering

1386
01:11:40,640 --> 01:11:45,839
Speaker 1: in the F word. People love. People love um like stuff.

1387
01:11:45,880 --> 01:11:47,600
Speaker 1: Because we're Our job is to talk about stuff on

1388
01:11:47,640 --> 01:11:51,439
Speaker 1: there that we you know, um, that is that people

1389
01:11:51,439 --> 01:11:53,360
Speaker 1: don't talk about normally. And now we've got to go,

1390
01:11:53,439 --> 01:11:55,800
Speaker 1: and so I'm gonna close with a little rap. This

1391
01:11:55,840 --> 01:11:58,280
Speaker 1: isn't my best rap, but you know it's this isn't

1392
01:11:58,280 --> 01:12:01,759
Speaker 1: that Luigi sitting next to me. He's sad, he's always depressed.

1393
01:12:01,760 --> 01:12:03,639
Speaker 1: I gotta take him for a walk today. That means

1394
01:12:03,680 --> 01:12:05,920
Speaker 1: I gotta go get dressed. I can't really wear this out.

1395
01:12:05,960 --> 01:12:07,559
Speaker 1: I mean, I guess it's kind of fine. I got

1396
01:12:07,560 --> 01:12:11,439
Speaker 1: the shirt from a rental company. Um, it probably cost

1397
01:12:11,760 --> 01:12:14,519
Speaker 1: what I pay for that retail. Hell fucking no, it's

1398
01:12:14,560 --> 01:12:17,000
Speaker 1: just a shirt that says blondie that's made to look retro.

1399
01:12:17,720 --> 01:12:19,960
Speaker 1: My shorts I got from a tanning place when I

1400
01:12:20,000 --> 01:12:23,840
Speaker 1: was waiting um for my booth to be clean. They

1401
01:12:23,880 --> 01:12:28,120
Speaker 1: have a whole retail section and the stuff. You know

1402
01:12:28,160 --> 01:12:30,680
Speaker 1: what I mean, it was overpriced, and they caught me.

1403
01:12:30,760 --> 01:12:32,760
Speaker 1: They said it it's on sale for forty bucks. I

1404
01:12:32,800 --> 01:12:35,800
Speaker 1: was like those shirts sorts that used to be bucks.

1405
01:12:35,840 --> 01:12:37,920
Speaker 1: That's a steel. So I didn't steal them, but I

1406
01:12:37,960 --> 01:12:40,160
Speaker 1: bought them because sometimes it convinces me that I'm getting

1407
01:12:40,160 --> 01:12:43,040
Speaker 1: a deal, even when they purposely mark something up and

1408
01:12:43,040 --> 01:12:45,320
Speaker 1: then they take it down. That's real, that's real, that's

1409
01:12:45,360 --> 01:12:47,519
Speaker 1: what they do. I really got to go. I don't

1410
01:12:47,520 --> 01:12:50,200
Speaker 1: know why I'm talking about shorts. When I started talking

1411
01:12:50,240 --> 01:12:53,840
Speaker 1: about my flow, Hell yeah, hell yeah, yo, is this

1412
01:12:53,880 --> 01:12:57,640
Speaker 1: thing on? Yeah? Is this thing on? Yeah? It is?

1413
01:12:57,680 --> 01:13:00,519
Speaker 1: It's real on you can hear me. All right, let's

1414
01:13:00,560 --> 01:13:02,320
Speaker 1: break it down. You know this is my dog, No

1415
01:13:02,439 --> 01:13:05,720
Speaker 1: it's not. This is marrying. I'd like to crumble her up,

1416
01:13:06,000 --> 01:13:09,840
Speaker 1: make her liquid fied, and shoot it like Heroin. Where

1417
01:13:09,840 --> 01:13:11,400
Speaker 1: are you done? That's all you need to do. That

1418
01:13:11,520 --> 01:13:15,519
Speaker 1: was fucking good. Don't even try to bring that. I mean,

1419
01:13:15,720 --> 01:13:17,880
Speaker 1: flowing does feel good because it just you know, what

1420
01:13:17,920 --> 01:13:21,080
Speaker 1: it forces you to do is be creative quickly and

1421
01:13:21,120 --> 01:13:23,200
Speaker 1: you're not sing and to turn your brain off and

1422
01:13:23,240 --> 01:13:25,240
Speaker 1: just go for the easiest rhyme. Noah, do you want

1423
01:13:25,240 --> 01:13:29,400
Speaker 1: to try it? Hell? No? Alright, guys, thank you so

1424
01:13:29,479 --> 01:13:31,639
Speaker 1: much for listening. Thank you to m our bestie. If

1425
01:13:31,680 --> 01:13:34,800
Speaker 1: you want to be a guestie, Bestie, guestie, please right

1426
01:13:34,920 --> 01:13:38,640
Speaker 1: to the podcast on our Instagram. Even d m us

1427
01:13:38,680 --> 01:13:40,640
Speaker 1: tell us what the story If there's something that we

1428
01:13:40,680 --> 01:13:42,160
Speaker 1: talked about on the show, and you go, I actually

1429
01:13:42,200 --> 01:13:45,080
Speaker 1: have insider info on that, reach out to Noah. Submit

1430
01:13:45,120 --> 01:13:48,120
Speaker 1: your story and maybe we'll interview you on Busties as

1431
01:13:48,160 --> 01:13:50,679
Speaker 1: guesties and uh, we have a show for you tomorrow.

1432
01:13:50,760 --> 01:13:53,719
Speaker 1: Don't don't you think we don't uh, don't be cut

1433
01:13:53,880 --> 01:14:01,040
Speaker 1: And I gave up on mine, I said Jack o'lanner.

1434
01:14:01,160 --> 01:14:03,640
Speaker 1: I said Jackson, Oh wow. I didn't even to the

1435
01:14:03,760 --> 01:14:05,800
Speaker 1: end because I was listening to you and I turned

1436
01:14:05,840 --> 01:14:06,360
Speaker 1: off my brain.