Speaker 1: The Nicky Glazer Podcast. Here's Nikki. Hello here, I am
Speaker 1: welcome to the show. It's a Nicki Glezer podcast. It's
Speaker 1: Wednesday edition. Um in not in the studio with me remotely,
Speaker 1: but it feels like they're here. Um. We've got Anya
Speaker 1: in New York. How about uh? And we got Noah
Speaker 1: in Arizona, which is also a city. Thank you, Brian. Yeah,
Speaker 1: did you look at into it? I did. It's like
Speaker 1: like on the side of a highway or something. Oh,
Speaker 1: one of the like the ones that just has like
Speaker 1: a restop or something. Yeah, yeah, exactly, like a population
Speaker 1: of five. Right. And then Brian Frangie is visiting us
Speaker 1: again from Los Angeles. Welcome back to the show, Brian.
Speaker 1: Have you ever heard Yeah, I'm obsessed with them. Okay,
Speaker 1: wait I don't have them, but I want them so bad.
Speaker 1: Wait shoes, Wait, there's shoes right? No, no, no. Zizix
Speaker 1: is a a roadside town. If you're driving everywhere, lay wa, Zizix.
Speaker 1: It's a it's if you're driving from La to I
Speaker 1: think Las Vegas. I think it's in between LA and
Speaker 1: Las Vegas. You'll see I hate green sign for a
Speaker 1: town called Zizzix. It's in the middle of nowhere, and
Speaker 1: it's spelled I might get this wrong, but it spelled
Speaker 1: zy x x y x x or something. Yes, I
Speaker 1: remember that does One time I sat on my keyboard
Speaker 1: and I came out a cat walked across a keyboard,
Speaker 1: and that's how they got that town. Okay, okay, Zizzix. Well,
Speaker 1: how do they name that town? That's what I thought
Speaker 1: when I was Okay, did you as you were driving?
Speaker 1: I googled it? Well, no, I asked. I asked my
Speaker 1: fiance or wife or whatever to google it, and uh,
Speaker 1: we discovered that that the person who names Zizzix had
Speaker 1: a vendetta against the government and decided to name the
Speaker 1: town Zizix just to mess with the people who have
Speaker 1: to write that into the register. Oh man, good job, dude.
Speaker 1: That would be That would be a fun break in
Speaker 1: my day if I was just writing down towns all
Speaker 1: day and then I'm like, what is this one? And
Speaker 1: that would actually wake me up. I think that's a
Speaker 1: good thing to do. Z why x x yeah why
Speaker 1: x zz top zz y z x zz y zz
Speaker 1: x z y z x. It was formerly non Annesota
Speaker 1: Springs and the guy invented this like retreats where you
Speaker 1: could go there and like, you know, discover yourself and
Speaker 1: become healthy. And then it's turned out to be like
Speaker 1: a scam, and so then the government came after him
Speaker 1: and then eventually to get a vendetta against them that
Speaker 1: he named it zizix Oh man, he showed them that's
Speaker 1: a creative angry man an ya. That sounds like a
Speaker 1: documentary you would want to watch about soda springs and
Speaker 1: whatever cult self help. Yeah, I haven't seen Wild Wild Country,
Speaker 1: but I hear that's you would love it. It's so
Speaker 1: well done. That's the next document that everyone was in
Speaker 1: two years ago that I need to get into and
Speaker 1: I'll be obsessed with it for a week and no
Speaker 1: one will want to talk to me about it because
Speaker 1: they're like, yeah, well we all talked about this already.
Speaker 1: So when used to have have a stand up joke like
Speaker 1: that of like, do you ever see a movie that
Speaker 1: everyone's already seen and you're like, he can't stop talking
Speaker 1: about Like I'll get that way with like a few
Speaker 1: good men, I'm like, have you guys seen this kind
Speaker 1: of like you with Succession? It's cool. I like it
Speaker 1: because you're making me rewatch it. Like I'll get back
Speaker 1: into wild wild country. Oh my god, I've I've talked
Speaker 1: to so many people about Succession that I've actually yesterday
Speaker 1: I saw my boyfriend's brother, Tim Convey, Brian Frandi's former roommate,
Speaker 1: and I asked him. I was like, have you are
Speaker 1: you into Succession? He goes, you already asked me this.
Speaker 1: I'm like, I've already already like no, and I'm like,
Speaker 1: damn it. He's like, I know, I got a be
Speaker 1: and I like, so I'm already like making the rounds
Speaker 1: through everyone. Um yeah, it's starting a new season as
Speaker 1: this Sunday. It's very exciting. Um so. But the funny
Speaker 1: thing about you asked me about Zizzix is that I
Speaker 1: literally have an app or like a note on my
Speaker 1: phone of like podcast topics, right, and one of them
Speaker 1: is the shoes. I think I broke in Zizzis. I
Speaker 1: think I may have erased it, But for a while
Speaker 1: I had written on here Zizzix because I'm obsessed with
Speaker 1: these shoes that keep getting marketed to me on Instagram
Speaker 1: where you don't have to tie them their gym shoes,
Speaker 1: but you just slip your feet into them. Have you
Speaker 1: seen these no they're so cute. Zizzix. I think it's zi. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I don't. Someone was trying to fuck with the people
Speaker 1: that would have to. Yeah, there was another vendetta. Um,
Speaker 1: but they're kiss kiss sorry kissicks. Is that ki s
Speaker 1: I K s or something like that. But you don't
Speaker 1: have to tie them, and it's just all that. The
Speaker 1: Instagram videos are always like women holding babies and like
Speaker 1: just being like we've got too much going on, and
Speaker 1: they just slip their foot into it and it's like
Speaker 1: a dream. And that's why I keep all of my
Speaker 1: shoes untied, so that I can just slip like mine
Speaker 1: are all very All my shoes are loose, because I
Speaker 1: like them to all be like loafers that I can
Speaker 1: just put my foot into. But I'm I've been craving
Speaker 1: some kissics. I don't know why I haven't bought them yet,
Speaker 1: but I want to. I wonder if any of our
Speaker 1: besties have them and can report how great they are,
Speaker 1: because tying your shoes is annoying and and a lot
Speaker 1: of times I'll jam my foot into a shoe and
Speaker 1: then the tongue just gets all like fucking crumpled up,
Speaker 1: and then I'll just wear it like that because I'm
Speaker 1: too lazy even bend over and pull that tongue out.
Speaker 1: So kiszics are really my speed. Um. A couple of
Speaker 1: other things I've written down because I have this note
Speaker 1: up is that um pump And I want to just
Speaker 1: talk about what pump is because it's a word that
Speaker 1: everyone needs to know. So you've a dog, Brian, right,
Speaker 1: what's your dog's name again? Jaldie Jack? Okay? Um, So
Speaker 1: Jack is such a cute little dog, and I bet
Speaker 1: it could have a pump. And I know that your
Speaker 1: dog Willa can have a pump. I even think cats
Speaker 1: can have pumps. So a pulp is something on an animal,
Speaker 1: most likely a canine animal, where it's um upper lip
Speaker 1: gets kind of like, uh, it's maybe when it has
Speaker 1: dry teeth and it's upper lip gets kind of like
Speaker 1: stuck and yeah, yeah, it gets stuck on the almost
Speaker 1: the like the gum line because it's so dry, and
Speaker 1: it pumps up, so it like it makes the fur
Speaker 1: like kind of raise up, and it kind of just
Speaker 1: looks makes it look a little stupid, but it also
Speaker 1: looks like, oh, it's got a pump. Like dogs get
Speaker 1: up all the time. Do you ever do you know
Speaker 1: what I'm talking about, Brian. Where has your dog ever
Speaker 1: gotten a pump? I mean, I'm gonna definitely look out
Speaker 1: for it, but you can't say you can force it.
Speaker 1: You just dry off their teeth and then you raise
Speaker 1: up their lip and have it get stuck, and it'll
Speaker 1: just be like, oh, little pump. It's so because they
Speaker 1: look so cute. Yeah, Elvis for a dog. Elvis had
Speaker 1: a poem. Um Matt and I spent seven minutes once
Speaker 1: trying to get will it to have a poem? Just
Speaker 1: dead seed? Yeah. We just like kept talking and she
Speaker 1: was like, whatten that the Lord's name is going on?
Speaker 1: We were just it's just light abuse. It's just a
Speaker 1: little tickle of abuse. Um uh. Speaking of animals. Yesterday,
Speaker 1: I was in a funk. I was just woke up
Speaker 1: on the wrong side of my uterus and I was
Speaker 1: just hormonally imbalanced, in such a bad mood. I went
Speaker 1: to my voice lesson, which I go to twice a week,
Speaker 1: and I literally drove a I have to drive a
Speaker 1: half hour out there, um and I just went and
Speaker 1: we did not sing at all. I just was like,
Speaker 1: I'm depressed, and then he like talked to me about
Speaker 1: the whole time, Like it's like therapy. I really I
Speaker 1: feel bad for this guy because he's become like my
Speaker 1: therapist and he's like, this is happening to you way
Speaker 1: too often. I'm like, I know. He's like, do you
Speaker 1: see someone. I'm like yes, and like it was just
Speaker 1: a bad day, you know, one of those days. Thank
Speaker 1: god I didn't have to plod. Yes, my Volke coach you. Yeah,
Speaker 1: shout out to Michael Rokio. But I just did actually
Speaker 1: an interview for STL magazine that's going to come out
Speaker 1: in like June. But my buddy Nick, who is a
Speaker 1: journalist there and now we're friends through this process. He's
Speaker 1: like followed me around. He was at our show an
Speaker 1: ya Um in Saint Louis. Remember the guy that was
Speaker 1: interviewing me in backstage? Oh yeah, we kept yeah, I'd
Speaker 1: be like, okay, I have to like, you know, try
Speaker 1: on a different bras so you need to leave again,
Speaker 1: And then he didn't come back in. He's a nice guy,
Speaker 1: but we were just we just met up at eight
Speaker 1: o'clock at Starbucks around the corner to uh extend to
Speaker 1: talk more about follow up two months later for this
Speaker 1: interview they're doing like an in depth thing. It's going
Speaker 1: to be like a big, big thing. But um, he
Speaker 1: was talking to me about stuff and I was like,
Speaker 1: and I see this voice teacher, and all I do
Speaker 1: is like, it's like therapy. And he goes and I go,
Speaker 1: he's all the way out in Chesterville and he goes,
Speaker 1: is it Michael Rochio? And I was like, wait what
Speaker 1: He was like, I see Michael Rokio. I was like,
Speaker 1: Oh my god. And I was so excited to talk
Speaker 1: to someone else that knows this amazing man who has
Speaker 1: helped me so much. Singing wise, not so much, but
Speaker 1: I've learned a lot of life's lessons and stories. No
Speaker 1: singing wise, he's given me a lot of confidence, which,
Speaker 1: if you learned anything from the podcast yesterday, based on
Speaker 1: my experience at the Mark Twain Prize for Adam Sandler,
Speaker 1: confidence is kind of all you need and the belief
Speaker 1: that hard work makes it begets talent if you know that,
Speaker 1: if you know that you can do anything, you just
Speaker 1: have to work hard. That's all you need and you
Speaker 1: can be successful. But anyway, so I was meeting up
Speaker 1: with him, Oh yeah, I was really down yesterday and
Speaker 1: I just couldn't get out of it all day, and
Speaker 1: I tried so many things. I went for a run,
Speaker 1: I went took a walk. I I just I took.
Speaker 1: I took a three hour nap in the middle of
Speaker 1: the day, even though I didn't need it. Things that
Speaker 1: were both not helpful and helpful. I was just. I
Speaker 1: shared a lot on our Girls Chat of like really
Speaker 1: dark stuff. I went to that voice listen. I tried
Speaker 1: to get out and do stuff wasn't going away. And
Speaker 1: then I saw some story of this burn victim. I
Speaker 1: love burn victims. I don't know if you guys know this.
Speaker 1: I yesterday Michael Roko by the way, I was like,
Speaker 1: what do you like, Like, what are things that bring
Speaker 1: you joy? And I go Taylor Swift and he goes, okay,
Speaker 1: other than that, I go documentary is about plane crashes.
Speaker 1: He was like, I saw that one was very good.
Speaker 1: I was like, um, books about Columbine, and I'm like,
Speaker 1: I don't know. I'm just into weird stuff. I wish
Speaker 1: I liked things that other girls like, like Linen's, but
Speaker 1: I can't. And then and then my friends were like,
Speaker 1: why do you want to like Linen's And I said, Okay,
Speaker 1: here's why I want to like linen's. When like a
Speaker 1: girl likes a linen and a threadcount likes to like
Speaker 1: feel linen. It's not that I want to like linen's.
Speaker 1: If you are able to find joy out of like
Speaker 1: a nice piece of like fabric and just like you know,
Speaker 1: touch it and go like this is so beautiful and
Speaker 1: look at the fringe around it and go like I
Speaker 1: love this tablecloth or whatever the fuck it is, that
Speaker 1: means your life is pretty good. That means that like
Speaker 1: things you have a lot of space for, and you
Speaker 1: are present and you're able to somatically take in the
Speaker 1: world and feel it on like a molecular level, like
Speaker 1: you can it. Just that's not that I want to
Speaker 1: like linens. I want to be able to stop and
Speaker 1: smell the roses and touch the linens. So it's more
Speaker 1: about that. So I was telling him that I liked
Speaker 1: all these dark things and I want to add it
Speaker 1: to the list burn victims. I like burn victims. I
Speaker 1: like reading about them, I like watching them on my
Speaker 1: Instagram because my biggest fear is losing my looks, you know, gradually,
Speaker 1: which we I think most women in the Western world,
Speaker 1: in most Eastern worlds as well, are worried about aging
Speaker 1: and men as well. I'll throw you guys into this too.
Speaker 1: We're all worried about aging. Makes us feel less relevant,
Speaker 1: makes us feel like we're closer to death. People don't
Speaker 1: want to fuck us, people aren't nice as nice to us.
Speaker 1: It's just like the world gets kind of small dollar
Speaker 1: and you were all trying to grasp onto it because
Speaker 1: we're constantly filled with images of like fighting wrinkles and
Speaker 1: fighting aging, age defying serums, like everything is age defying.
Speaker 1: Burn victims instantly go from being hot too unfuckable and
Speaker 1: not unfuckable in the sense that they can't still be
Speaker 1: loved and people can't have sex with them and be
Speaker 1: attracted them. Of course they can. But you go from
Speaker 1: being really good looking and a normal person to being
Speaker 1: someone that like makes people gasp sometimes when they see you,
Speaker 1: because your face is definitely disfigured. There's no doubt about it.
Speaker 1: That's not mean baking a judgment on the person. It's
Speaker 1: just true, and that's fascinating to me. Does that not
Speaker 1: spark your guys's interest at all to see people who
Speaker 1: have been horribly disfigured or has had something like catastrophic
Speaker 1: happened to them, and yet they still are like talking
Speaker 1: about their day like they or they just share how
Speaker 1: they go about their normal day. Does that interest you
Speaker 1: guys at all? I can understand how you'd be inspired
Speaker 1: by their, you know, ability to move on and try
Speaker 1: to live life to the fullest despite their disfigurement. Yes,
Speaker 1: it's there in my town where I live. And he
Speaker 1: has elephant titus of his face. So he has like
Speaker 1: a completely disfigured face and like a lot of flesh
Speaker 1: hanging off his face, like yes, if a whole nother head. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and it's very It's like if you didn't know, you'd
Speaker 1: be like, like, he looks like he's wearing the scariest
Speaker 1: mask ever. Yeah, And he's very popular in town. He's
Speaker 1: very kind, Like I walk by him a lot. He's
Speaker 1: always nice. Um, everybody knows him. And the other day
Speaker 1: he was on the corner yesterday, I was walking Willa
Speaker 1: and he just goes, what a beautiful creature, what a
Speaker 1: beautiful dog. I was like, thank you, And I was
Speaker 1: just thinking, that's an interesting comment from a man with
Speaker 1: an elephantit. Yeah, did they have to call it elephant titus?
Speaker 1: I feel like it was either that or zizzis. Honestly,
Speaker 1: it's you're so right, Brian, Like they're already like they
Speaker 1: couldn't come up with anything. It's like Seinfeld's joke about rhinoplastics,
Speaker 1: Like that's come up with it. You got to compare
Speaker 1: these or some people who already feel and secure about
Speaker 1: their giant nose rhinoplastic. Maybe oh it's called elephantiasis. Maybe
Speaker 1: it's outdated. Maybe it's like no, yeah, you don't say it. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm looking at pictures online. No, it's it's interesting to
Speaker 1: me because I like watching less about inspiration. Well, yeah,
Speaker 1: I think it's that because I go, man, I wake
Speaker 1: up some days and my face feels a little bit
Speaker 1: like swollen or I you know, I've talked about it
Speaker 1: extensively on here, just fearing facial changes, you know that
Speaker 1: we all do. That's why I get botox, I get filler,
Speaker 1: I do all these things trying to fight it. And
Speaker 1: then you see someone who went from being a really
Speaker 1: attractive woman to overnight looking in a way that makes
Speaker 1: people makes kids go like, mommy, what's wrong with her?
Speaker 1: I mean that is like to live through that and
Speaker 1: it is inspiring, but like it just it's fascinating to me.
Speaker 1: It's just in the same way that I'm in. I
Speaker 1: don't know what it is. But anyway, so last night
Speaker 1: I was trying I Michael Rocchio kept like prodding at me,
Speaker 1: being like, what are you into? Like stop do this
Speaker 1: whole thing. I didn't want to start crying, so I
Speaker 1: didn't really want to talk about my feeling so I
Speaker 1: was kind of being obstinate, like of just is that
Speaker 1: a word of being like all I like is plane crashes.
Speaker 1: I'm a dumb person, I'm dark like. I was just
Speaker 1: kind of just being like, I don't want to talk
Speaker 1: about my feelings. I don't want to get at the
Speaker 1: root of this. And because I didn't want to cry,
Speaker 1: because his wife is like in the next room, and
Speaker 1: I didn't want to hurt like hear me crying. She's
Speaker 1: a singer as well, she would have been like, well,
Speaker 1: this girl just waste our time. And so I was
Speaker 1: just trying to not cry. And then finally I was like,
Speaker 1: you know what, animals, I really like animals. That is
Speaker 1: something that interests me and I love So last night
Speaker 1: I also saw this burn victim that this Australian runner
Speaker 1: girl who was doing a long run and she got
Speaker 1: caught in a brushfire and completely burned her whole face.
Speaker 1: I don't remember her name, but she's very, very famous
Speaker 1: in Australia and so inspiring. And she was talking about
Speaker 1: how she doesn't start her morning by just like jumping
Speaker 1: on her phone and there's a lot of things like
Speaker 1: this online and this has nothing to do with her
Speaker 1: being a burn victim. It was just a part of
Speaker 1: what I was saying. But she's just talking about, like
Speaker 1: I just get a book, I go out, and I like,
Speaker 1: I don't go on my phone right away. I just
Speaker 1: try to like surround myself with things that make me
Speaker 1: feel good in the morning because that all is coming later.
Speaker 1: Why do I just have to do it right away
Speaker 1: and have it hijack my day? But last night I
Speaker 1: kind of employed that. I was like, get off my phone,
Speaker 1: what can I watch? I was thinking, maybe I'll watch
Speaker 1: The Bachelor with Anya because she was watching that and
Speaker 1: I do like Anya and I like to watch things
Speaker 1: together and text each other during it. We watched the
Speaker 1: show Perfect Match on Netflix that is truly one of
Speaker 1: the most garbage reality shows I've ever seen. And I'm
Speaker 1: the host of Fboey Island. I can tell you like,
Speaker 1: I've hosted shows that have crazy premises that don't really
Speaker 1: make sense and you know, are just loose and just funny,
Speaker 1: and this one is also one of those. But it's
Speaker 1: not good and I don't like it. But I was
Speaker 1: almost going to put that on or something, and then
Speaker 1: I was like, I should watch something with animals in it.
Speaker 1: And usually animal stuff is so sad, but there's this
Speaker 1: really great documentary that just won an Academy Award on
Speaker 1: Netflix called The Elephant Whisperer, and it made me feel
Speaker 1: so fucking good to see these Indian people caring for
Speaker 1: these baby elephants in the story of how these elephants
Speaker 1: get abandoned is sad, but it's really heartwarming. It's only
Speaker 1: forty minutes long, and I swear to God, it makes
Speaker 1: you feel so good about yourself and about the world
Speaker 1: and it makes you cry, and it's like it just
Speaker 1: was like the best thing for my soul. So I
Speaker 1: just have to remember to maybe put on more animal
Speaker 1: like documentary things, but not there's not enough of them.
Speaker 1: There's not enough happy animal documentaries. No, they're all sad
Speaker 1: because there's always like they're they'll walk you through the
Speaker 1: mating rituals and like the babies are born and then
Speaker 1: the fires come and then there's like they show babies
Speaker 1: just be like like looking for their mom, and then
Speaker 1: I'm like, fuck, I can't deal because guess what, there's
Speaker 1: no good climate news. You're not gonna watch any documentary
Speaker 1: that's really telling you how it is, and you're gonna
Speaker 1: be uplifted. It's all grim the world is. It's too
Speaker 1: late by twenty thirty to say to change anything. I
Speaker 1: don't know if you've heard that report yesterday. Well we'll
Speaker 1: talk about this and more after we get back from
Speaker 1: the break. So did you guys hear though that by
Speaker 1: twenty thirty, Um, it's over, Like that's the that's the date. Yeah,
Speaker 1: what's the official statement that if we don't do massive
Speaker 1: make massive changes right now by twenty thirty, it's too
Speaker 1: late and that's it. But they I feel like we've
Speaker 1: been hearing this a while and that's why no one
Speaker 1: gives a fuck anymore when it's really being said, Brian,
Speaker 1: remember yea or do you remember who watch k when
Speaker 1: like the machines were supposed to turn against us? Yes,
Speaker 1: but this is based on a reel like atmosphere and
Speaker 1: like the polar ice caps melting faster. Like there's literally
Speaker 1: never any good news about the climate. There's never of like,
Speaker 1: it's not melting as fast as we thought it was.
Speaker 1: Oh this, you know, the droughts are actually not as
Speaker 1: bad as we thought they would be. It's always way worse.
Speaker 1: So I'm with Noah on this one. I think climate
Speaker 1: change is like Y two K. I think when twenty
Speaker 1: thirty comes, we're all gonna be waiting for the bomb
Speaker 1: to drop and nothing's going to happen, and we're like,
Speaker 1: why did we save water at all? Do you think
Speaker 1: that we'll have like compounds or live slightly differently, or
Speaker 1: like have SPF seventy eight, or like, how are we
Speaker 1: gonna I don't think most places would be able to
Speaker 1: go outside by twenty fifty. You're not going to be
Speaker 1: able to go outside and in a lot of the
Speaker 1: planet anymore, just or you can, you'll have to like
Speaker 1: run really quick between buildings because it's just gonna be
Speaker 1: too hot. I mean, it's already too hot in summers
Speaker 1: for things to happen. They had to have the World
Speaker 1: Cup in the winter. You know, we are adaptable. Maybe
Speaker 1: we'll just spend most of our days indoors with sun
Speaker 1: that looks like Kirsten, Yeah, that's what will happen. Yeah,
Speaker 1: our friend Kurston is always in the morning. She's like, hi, guys,
Speaker 1: on the girl's check, just um making salt meal and
Speaker 1: just hanging out in front of my sun lamp. What
Speaker 1: does she call it? It's like she was does the
Speaker 1: brand name from twenty four Yeah? Yeah, I think that. Well.
Speaker 1: I don't think we're all going to perish on January first,
Speaker 1: twenty thirty, but that is the date where it's worked.
Speaker 1: Don't even try anymore. It's irreversible. Yeah, there's no turning exactness.
Speaker 1: I feel like there's a lot of that catastrophizing that
Speaker 1: comes out too frequently, Like you're saying, like it's every
Speaker 1: couple of months there's like, Okay, we've now passed this
Speaker 1: threshold where there's no turning back, and then two months
Speaker 1: later like and now we've really passed the threshold. And yes,
Speaker 1: it's like how many thresholds are there? Maybe we should
Speaker 1: just send a child events a recycling center that like
Speaker 1: makes all of this, you know, old wine bottles into
Speaker 1: canoes or something. I don't know. There's always there is
Speaker 1: always something like there's a new bug that eats plastic
Speaker 1: bottles and you're like, oh, this bug will save us,
Speaker 1: or like there, I do believe that there is technology
Speaker 1: out there that will bail us out in little ways,
Speaker 1: but it's just gonna make it so we can all
Speaker 1: we're not going to be able to like live once
Speaker 1: the damage is done. Like if you I don't know,
Speaker 1: like you can if you if you pour ink on
Speaker 1: a carpet, you can like sop it up, but you're
Speaker 1: never gonna get that stain out. It's done, Like you
Speaker 1: can't go back. So like, yeah, there'll be things that
Speaker 1: we can do to make it look like a little
Speaker 1: bit more livable, but you know, if we don't figure
Speaker 1: this out, there's it's not going to be the planet
Speaker 1: won't be that inhabitable. Did you guys know that Mars
Speaker 1: is like millions of miles away? The other day I
Speaker 1: saw a picture of Earth from Mars and it said
Speaker 1: it was like, no, will you look up how far
Speaker 1: Mars is? Because we've landed on Mars with a rover. Correct,
Speaker 1: how the fuck did anything travel millions of miles? One
Speaker 1: hundred million miles or something? It's like one hundred twenty
Speaker 1: six million miles, maybe a one hundred and twenty seven
Speaker 1: point two three million miles? How did I mean? That's
Speaker 1: pretty impressive? How Nikki that is? So I was off
Speaker 1: by a million point two? How many? That is? So
Speaker 1: long to travel? Did we send that thing off in
Speaker 1: eighteen twenty two and then it finally landed like this year?
Speaker 1: How did we get a rope that blew my mind?
Speaker 1: I would have guessed thousands of miles? One hundreds of
Speaker 1: millions of miles? Does that blow your Maris's mind at all?
Speaker 1: It's too large of a number to comprehend, right, which
Speaker 1: is very long? Yeah? So you know that a million
Speaker 1: seconds a million seconds is something like twelve days, and
Speaker 1: a billion seconds is thirty seven years. You know that difference,
Speaker 1: isn't there? Envy for women who like Linen's is equal
Speaker 1: to my envy for you remembering these numbers. Well, I'm
Speaker 1: probably off by that, but I know I committed that
Speaker 1: one to memory like you would lyrics to a song
Speaker 1: that you wanted to sing. I'm not kidding you, because
Speaker 1: that was one where I go, I never remember this one.
Speaker 1: It's so interesting, So I worked hard to remember that,
Speaker 1: and I don't know that I did. That is so cool.
Speaker 1: What is nine times seven? Oh? God, that one's I
Speaker 1: think it's I think it's um. If I'm gonna go
Speaker 1: off the dome, I'm gonna say it's sixty three, but
Speaker 1: I always think it's fifty six. Okay, tell me the
Speaker 1: thing I want to know again? It was all fucked up?
Speaker 1: What um you would memorize it? Okay? Yeah? A million
Speaker 1: seconds is twelve days. I think it's something like that.
Speaker 1: It's eleven days, eleven days, Okay. Ready, A million seconds
Speaker 1: is eleven days, right. A billion seconds is thirty seven years.
Speaker 1: I believe what could be thirty two? Those two numbers
Speaker 1: are swirling in my head. So that's the difference when
Speaker 1: someone says they have a billion dollars, just it's not
Speaker 1: even close to a million. That's a difference between an
Speaker 1: eleven year, eleven day old baby and a thirty seven
Speaker 1: year old man. That is the difference. So it's like,
Speaker 1: there's no don't even think that you ever make a
Speaker 1: billion dollars. Sorry, one million seconds is eleven days, okay,
Speaker 1: A billion seconds is thirty seven years, thirty two years
Speaker 1: or thirty that is. That's a fascinating little factoid, right.
Speaker 1: It does put it in comparison. You know how you
Speaker 1: have that or you've seen that calendar with the how
Speaker 1: many weeks you have that calendar? Get it. Don't even
Speaker 1: bring it up. That fucking thing bugs the shit out
Speaker 1: of me. If you two guys nobody's talking about it,
Speaker 1: tells me how much of life? No it is, Oh,
Speaker 1: it is eight it is. Ah, it's a poster of dots, right, Brian,
Speaker 1: you've showed us to me. Yeah, it's see this. This
Speaker 1: is on my list of things that I like, climate change, disaster,
Speaker 1: burn victims, and how many weeks you have to live.
Speaker 1: It is a plot, a graph almost of like dots
Speaker 1: just across, you know, and then it's probably like twelve
Speaker 1: across and then fifty down and then it's all filled
Speaker 1: in so it's like a dot forever. Oh no, it's
Speaker 1: fifty two across fifty down right, So it's almost like
Speaker 1: a square fifty two meeting each week of a year,
Speaker 1: fifty meeting, Like you're probably fifty years to live if
Speaker 1: you're like or whatever. It is. No, no, no, sorry,
Speaker 1: let's say we all live to be eighty. So it's
Speaker 1: eighty on one axis, fifty two on the other right,
Speaker 1: So that shows a dot for every week of your life,
Speaker 1: and then it says like, if you're thirty something, this
Speaker 1: is how many dots you are, this is on the dot,
Speaker 1: and you can go week by week and you just
Speaker 1: see how many dots you have left and it ain't
Speaker 1: a lot, and it's like, I can't believe those are weeks.
Speaker 1: Those aren't years. Those are fucking weeks. And it is
Speaker 1: depressing because you look at the scope of your life
Speaker 1: and you're like, it comes down to these dots and
Speaker 1: I'm so many dots in That reminds me. I was
Speaker 1: watching Bobby Kelly on some interview and he was saying,
Speaker 1: how like something that really put life in perspective for
Speaker 1: him was he thought how many summers he had left,
Speaker 1: and like the number was dwindling. It's like, I only
Speaker 1: have many more summers left. Yeah, no, it's sad. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I have one of those posters, except it's one dot
Speaker 1: is a billion seconds, so it's only two dots and
Speaker 1: the first dots built in one dot left. Oh my god,
Speaker 1: you only have a billion seconds of life sixty four
Speaker 1: years later. Oh that's weird to think that you have
Speaker 1: like a billion seconds left to live now and now
Speaker 1: it's less than a billion because we've just started into it.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, Yeah, it's um and you don't even
Speaker 1: you're not even guaranteed that you know, No, that's just
Speaker 1: everything could happen. That's why I hate stuff like that.
Speaker 1: That's why I hate whenever someone posts on like when
Speaker 1: some tragedy happens, and then someone always guaranteed when there's
Speaker 1: something horrifically tragic that and someone will always comment like
Speaker 1: that just goes to show you that life is precious
Speaker 1: and every day county and never know how much time
Speaker 1: you have left. And it's like that's not a good
Speaker 1: way to think. Like if you go through life thinking
Speaker 1: like this might be my last moment on earth, I
Speaker 1: have to make the most of it, you'll go into
Speaker 1: a squirrels always you're like making phone calls to people
Speaker 1: you don't really want to make. You're like, I'll call
Speaker 1: my mom. Fine, yeah, but I know. I think it
Speaker 1: is a good reminder to be like, what would I
Speaker 1: do today if this was I mean, I don't think
Speaker 1: we really need to run through that because people are
Speaker 1: like if this was the last of your life, it
Speaker 1: would you do? I'd be like cry the whole day,
Speaker 1: like just be so sad. So yeah, I mean, but
Speaker 1: it does. I gotta believe there's something else, because this,
Speaker 1: this can't be it. You can't just say goodbye forever
Speaker 1: to think it's just too it's too much. I can't
Speaker 1: handle it. I can't. I can't. I got from mushrooms.
Speaker 1: The one time I did mushrooms in my life and
Speaker 1: tripped balls, I left my body. I went up into
Speaker 1: the stratosphere or what's past the atmosphere? You guys who
Speaker 1: have traveled a billion side. Yeah, but I just knew, Oh,
Speaker 1: I will exist after I die, because whatever I am
Speaker 1: now is not in the body of Anya. It is
Speaker 1: some it's like consciousness, but it's me with you. Do
Speaker 1: you really believe that? Yeah, I really believe that. Like,
Speaker 1: so you recommend tripping mushrooms because this is what people
Speaker 1: always say after they do mushrooms, is like they are
Speaker 1: okay with They're a little bit more okay with death. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I know, who never needs to do mushrooms again. Like,
Speaker 1: it was a terrifying night. I didn't have a great time,
Speaker 1: but the gift of that experience is invaluable, and I'm
Speaker 1: so glad I did it because I do not believe
Speaker 1: that when you die you're just done and like your
Speaker 1: life gets snuffed out. And this is just like every
Speaker 1: other person who talks about this experience. You can't make
Speaker 1: me understand what you know now. There's nothing you can
Speaker 1: say that will adequately make me get it without having
Speaker 1: that experience, Like talking to people who've done ayahuasca, mushrooms, LSD.
Speaker 1: You just it's just doesn't there's no way to communicate it.
Speaker 1: It sucks. Have you done that stuff? Brian No, No,
Speaker 1: I have not, And I do envy that feeling very
Speaker 1: much so. And it's the same way I view about
Speaker 1: really religious people, where it's like I envy you because
Speaker 1: you have this whole layer of anxiety that's been lifted
Speaker 1: because you have faith that there's something else after and
Speaker 1: that there's all a purpose and a plan. And I'm
Speaker 1: living in this universe that it's just random chaos, and
Speaker 1: I feel like when it's over, it's over, and it's
Speaker 1: that's a horrible place to be. You gotta watch Tyler
Speaker 1: Henry on Netflix, this kid who talks to ghosts that
Speaker 1: made me believe that there's something else right right, I'm
Speaker 1: not kidding. Can take his word for it like you
Speaker 1: can take my word for it. About mushrooms. Can't you
Speaker 1: watch Tyler Henry and that convinced you. And if I'm
Speaker 1: telling I want to feel it though, I want to
Speaker 1: have it in my bones, and I already do kind of,
Speaker 1: I just want to. There's other things you get from
Speaker 1: mushrooms too, that are like you get more okay with eight,
Speaker 1: You just get it more okay with everything, Like there's
Speaker 1: they're just so healing, but there is that aspect of
Speaker 1: where you could have a really bad trip and it's terrifying.
Speaker 1: Like Neil Brennan after he did DMT, the like drug
Speaker 1: that you know comes out of your brain when you die,
Speaker 1: and you could you know he did that, and he
Speaker 1: said that you couldn't pay him a billion dollars, That's
Speaker 1: what he said. And he's someone that's motivated my money
Speaker 1: for sure. He was like, I wouldn't do it again
Speaker 1: for a billion dollars. It was the most horrifying. He
Speaker 1: was like, horrifying. Isn't even a fucking fraction of the
Speaker 1: of what I felt. But I will never suffer with
Speaker 1: depression again because I did it. He was like, I'm
Speaker 1: cured because I did this, But what I recommended, God
Speaker 1: fucking no. It was the worst thing of my life.
Speaker 1: It was. It was I wouldn't recommend to anyone, but
Speaker 1: I'm healed now. I'll never suffer with depression again. He said.
Speaker 1: Then there's this hat that he's worn his whole life,
Speaker 1: and the hat came off. He couldn't describe what happened.
Speaker 1: He couldn't describe. There was noe. He just said that.
Speaker 1: I remember him saying that terrifying. It was a fraction
Speaker 1: of the feeling he felt. It was. It was like
Speaker 1: nothing he could describe. He couldn't describe it, much like
Speaker 1: what you're saying, like I can't grasp really what happened
Speaker 1: to you. But he said that he would not recommend it,
Speaker 1: and that he wouldn't do it again for a billion dollars.
Speaker 1: I mean, I know people who've taken DMT and it
Speaker 1: changed them. Yes, Like he became totally a different person
Speaker 1: after that, And it was it was I don't not
Speaker 1: necessarily for the better, but like a I don't know,
Speaker 1: for the like it changed them in a way that
Speaker 1: they became less motivated, they were a little slower. I
Speaker 1: know a few people who yeah, like they did DMT
Speaker 1: and like all of a sudden they were like did
Speaker 1: they lacked the motivation to continue their pall because so
Speaker 1: much of motivation is I don't want to die, I
Speaker 1: gotta make a legacy. I want money. I like things.
Speaker 1: I want validation. I want money that will get me
Speaker 1: validation and love. And so when you realize that none
Speaker 1: of that actually mattered or whatever they maybe learned, some
Speaker 1: of that decreases and you and maybe they are happier
Speaker 1: not having as much motivation. You know, I think they are.
Speaker 1: I think they are. They are happier, They're more content
Speaker 1: with where they are. But then in reality, they don't
Speaker 1: have any money anymore. They don't, Yeah, but they're very happier. No,
Speaker 1: I wouldn't like the Neil thing, like I don't want
Speaker 1: to no matter what is on the other side of that.
Speaker 1: I don't want to give up anything that sounds scary.
Speaker 1: I will not do even if it means freedom on
Speaker 1: the other side of it. I you know, I'll do
Speaker 1: a DMT when I die, thank you very much. Like
Speaker 1: it will be omitted naturally in that process. But that's
Speaker 1: not I don't want to do it anytime sooner. But
Speaker 1: I think mushrooms and LSD even though those I've heard
Speaker 1: I've been described as terrifying. I think those are roller
Speaker 1: coasters that I'm willing to go on because I don't
Speaker 1: do you this is DMT specifically that you've seen people
Speaker 1: lose motivation, and I'm guessing you're talking about one case
Speaker 1: study as opposed to multiple, right, Brian, I'm a few.
Speaker 1: I actually have a few. I've talked to a few
Speaker 1: people who have experienced this. Okay, wow, well that's the
Speaker 1: one I won't touch after what Neil told me. But
Speaker 1: the other ones I don't know. Maybe some besties have
Speaker 1: experiences with DMT that you can share. But yeah, this
Speaker 1: elephant documentary really lifted me out of it and there's
Speaker 1: a part of me that wants to go. So they
Speaker 1: have to call them elephants. It's just such a high row.
Speaker 1: It's so rude, but these little baby elephants are so
Speaker 1: cute and they are just so human and they are
Speaker 1: just so sweet, and it was just sweet to see
Speaker 1: these like Indian people speaking this language that I do
Speaker 1: not know and would never know. And then the subtitle
Speaker 1: is You're a good boy, aren't you? Are you the
Speaker 1: best boy? Are you the best boy? Like talking to
Speaker 1: the elephants the same way that we talked to are dogs.
Speaker 1: It was just so sweet. I'd screenshot at it, but
Speaker 1: it was like, you're the best little boy there ever
Speaker 1: was in this whole little village. Like they just talked
Speaker 1: to them sweetly. It's just it's so freaking sweet. So
Speaker 1: that's just more a proof that we're all the same. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: that reminds me of there was some study that a
Speaker 1: psychologist did with like a tribe in New Guinea or
Speaker 1: somewhere very remote, and they were like the stuff the
Speaker 1: women and the men were complaining about was like when
Speaker 1: they had a translator figure out, like what is the
Speaker 1: thing that troubles you the most? And they were like, well,
Speaker 1: he's I think he has a crush on her and
Speaker 1: I feel left out. And it was like all this
Speaker 1: same petty shit, or not petty, but like the same
Speaker 1: shit that we all struggle with everywhere else in the
Speaker 1: Western world. And he doesn't get the trash enough and
Speaker 1: separate the recycling from the river that we drink from.
Speaker 1: He doesn't. Yeah, it's that is interesting, Like we all
Speaker 1: do have, like even animals have jealousy, which I used
Speaker 1: to tell my parents because they'd be like, we gotta
Speaker 1: give Luigi treat if we gave Wiley one. I'm like,
Speaker 1: Wiley's two hundred pounds. Luigi does not get the same treat.
Speaker 1: He's gonna get fat. And they were like, well, he's jealous,
Speaker 1: and I'm like, animals don't have jealousy. Then every time
Speaker 1: I've eaten my words for ten years now or since
Speaker 1: I said that, every time the dogs like get jealous
Speaker 1: of each other, they go and the animost don't know
Speaker 1: if Josie Niki and I'm like, okay, they do. I
Speaker 1: get it. I'm sorry, but they've heard about the study
Speaker 1: about plants where no one which plants. The study about plants,
Speaker 1: the one where um, they were testing whether or not
Speaker 1: plants could feel emotions. And so they they took like
Speaker 1: I think it was like cabbage plants or something, and
Speaker 1: they would take a they would attach electrode. I don't
Speaker 1: know the science, but they're attached electrodes to the plant
Speaker 1: to see whether or not it did register. And they
Speaker 1: would take a cabbage plant and they would cut up
Speaker 1: a cabbage plant in front of the other cabbage and
Speaker 1: the cabbage the living cabbage plant would respond right to
Speaker 1: the cabbage plant being chopped up in front, and they
Speaker 1: were able to connect it to a device that would
Speaker 1: that would take those electrodes and turn them into noises,
Speaker 1: so then you would hear hear the screen, Yes, you
Speaker 1: would hear it. Oh god damn it. Yeah. Well this
Speaker 1: is always what people say to vegans, like, well, plant
Speaker 1: of feelings, and it's like, okay, well you know what,
Speaker 1: now I'm going to struggle to eat plants. Did you
Speaker 1: want like us? It doesn't change the way I feel.
Speaker 1: It's still now I'm going to eat plants and feel
Speaker 1: bad about it, but I have to fucking eat so um.
Speaker 1: Yeah that sucks to hear. But um, that's why you
Speaker 1: just don't hook your you don't need You don't hook
Speaker 1: your cabbage up to Yeah, you don't listen to your
Speaker 1: say never hook ellectrodes up to your fu. Yeah. At
Speaker 1: the same time, though, the positive takeaway is that if
Speaker 1: you have plants and you like talk to them, oh,
Speaker 1: then you grow better. They grow better. That's yeah, that's
Speaker 1: that's because of the oxygen, I think. But like they do.
Speaker 1: There's a world where your plants are listening to you,
Speaker 1: and they can hear what you're saying, and they react
Speaker 1: to your emotions. There's a world and everything's listening to
Speaker 1: us and say even up on the plants. Um, yeah,
Speaker 1: I do the other day I realized I hadn't fed
Speaker 1: my plants in a while, watered them, and I was
Speaker 1: like so sad, and I was like, I'm sorry, and
Speaker 1: I'm picking up like some of the dead leaves because
Speaker 1: it had been like anymore. And I was like, I
Speaker 1: am so sorry. Plant. I just felt so bad and
Speaker 1: I was like, oh no, I'm like, am tremorpathizing whatever
Speaker 1: that word is where you like make a thing that
Speaker 1: doesn't have human emotions have it? Um wait Briant twice again? No, oh,
Speaker 1: I can't any sheds. Yeah the cabbage please, don't to me.
Speaker 1: That's a cabbage. They're from like not my mom. Yeah,
Speaker 1: oh my god, Um, Brian, you had a bachelor party
Speaker 1: this weekend? Is that what you told me? Yeah? No,
Speaker 1: I went. I went into the woods and a cab.
Speaker 1: Yeah my god, and your bowsome crew? Did you find
Speaker 1: Chris on this but he couldn't go. I'm guessing well,
Speaker 1: I had a West Coast bachelor party in an East
Speaker 1: Coast bachelor party. Yeah, okay, Yeah, you didn't want to
Speaker 1: combine those two that would have been don't want people
Speaker 1: to have to feel like they have to mingle. I
Speaker 1: wanted to separate the friends groups so that everyone can life.
Speaker 1: Why why because your friends are socially awkward and they can't.
Speaker 1: Don't you think your friends would get along? Come on, man,
Speaker 1: they would get along fine. But I wanted everybody to
Speaker 1: feel completely at ease and natural. I don't want one
Speaker 1: of my friend to be like And I also don't
Speaker 1: want to be put in the position where I'm like
Speaker 1: in the middle facilitating conversations because like, oh, here's my
Speaker 1: friend Mike, here's meet my friend Jim. You buys both, Like,
Speaker 1: how about how we don't we stop doing that. I
Speaker 1: hate when people go, you, Nikki, this is this person,
Speaker 1: this person, and I'm like, I can do this myself.
Speaker 1: I guess some people need that, but I hate that
Speaker 1: because then I'm like, oh, now I'm being set up
Speaker 1: on a date and I don't want to talk to
Speaker 1: this person. I never did I would have gradually. I
Speaker 1: just feel And by the way, that's not your job.
Speaker 1: If people sign up to go to a party, they
Speaker 1: just they know. But I get I get wanting to
Speaker 1: um erase any kind of feelings of anxiety. So you
Speaker 1: kept them separate, so you have you had the West
Speaker 1: Coast one yet, yeah I did when the Midwest one.
Speaker 1: The Midwest one is uh yeah, it's gonna be next month,
Speaker 1: okay um, and then we're gonna do the Upper Peninsula. Yeah. Well,
Speaker 1: I feel like people do that thing that you're describing
Speaker 1: when they don't want to talk to the person that
Speaker 1: they're introducing you exactly, that is what happens. They always
Speaker 1: they pawn off someone on you and you go, I
Speaker 1: don't and then you and then you have to talk
Speaker 1: about you know that they gave you the only piece
Speaker 1: of information they gave you. It's so annoying. I like
Speaker 1: it because I'm like very awkward socially. And my sister
Speaker 1: used to have these part pies with like literary people,
Speaker 1: and she had it was her job to be like
Speaker 1: the host, and she was like, how do you make
Speaker 1: small talk with fifty people at night? And she was
Speaker 1: just really good at being like Anya you might you know,
Speaker 1: Anya's used to be an ice skater and this one
Speaker 1: like she would know these little factoids about people and
Speaker 1: like quickly set them up and then leave. And it
Speaker 1: was like, okay, well that's better than thing to talk about.
Speaker 1: How most people do it, I will say I am
Speaker 1: good at finding commonalities and being like, you guys need
Speaker 1: to talk about this, and I'm I will set you
Speaker 1: up for success. But some people just do it to
Speaker 1: get exactly what Brian is saying so they don't have
Speaker 1: to talk to either of you. Can you do it
Speaker 1: for me and Anya? Like what if we were at
Speaker 1: a party and you came up to us and you're like, hey, okay,
Speaker 1: plant voice okay, Um, I would say, oh, you guys,
Speaker 1: I both I did a podcast with both of you. Brian,
Speaker 1: I did a podcast with when I had that Not
Speaker 1: Safe show. Anya, I've done podcasts with forever. Um. Brian
Speaker 1: is getting married. You guys are both getting married soon
Speaker 1: in um this summer. Brian just had his bachelor party
Speaker 1: where he introduced people or didn't have to introduce anyone
Speaker 1: because he kept it like separate. Ana's not having a
Speaker 1: bachelorette party. What do you guys think about that? Like
Speaker 1: what or not that I know of? I haven't been
Speaker 1: invited yet if she is, and I would talk about
Speaker 1: like you're both getting or like Anya, as a musician, Brian,
Speaker 1: you like music, like I don't know, like I love
Speaker 1: the wedding thing. You could just leave it at that,
Speaker 1: but Anya says, Brian, you guys have both worked with
Speaker 1: me and lived with me or whatever. Brian hasn't, but
Speaker 1: you're both getting married soon and then bye. And then
Speaker 1: I'd be like, oh my god, Brian, you're getting married?
Speaker 1: Are you stressed out? Does everyone want to know the
Speaker 1: best icebreaker for a conversation if someone is married or
Speaker 1: has a girlfriend, or just ask how they met? It's
Speaker 1: a good It's always a good story, even if it's online.
Speaker 1: And if it's online and they want to seem like
Speaker 1: they go oh on an app? Which app? Who wrote first?
Speaker 1: Where'd you go on your first date? People love if
Speaker 1: they're in a good relationship. They love talking about their
Speaker 1: relationship and it's always a good story. Oh my god,
Speaker 1: can I tell you you're gonna love this? I was
Speaker 1: at a I think it was an engagement party where
Speaker 1: they were, Um, I would say pretty well to do?
Speaker 1: People like one of the people getting married was well
Speaker 1: to do hmm yeah, and um I heard that as
Speaker 1: his name was to do. Holy seconds like money do
Speaker 1: they have? Probably like yeah, um I And I was
Speaker 1: with my I was with Ali, my fiance, and um,
Speaker 1: someone was like, how'd you guys meet? And then and
Speaker 1: then we were like we always think it's cute to
Speaker 1: be like, yeah, we met on we met on an app,
Speaker 1: and then people are always like, um oh that, oh
Speaker 1: my god. Really and then sometimes the other people we
Speaker 1: talked to have met on an app and that's you
Speaker 1: really connect there. Yeah, we said, They said how did
Speaker 1: you meet and we said, oh, we met on an
Speaker 1: app and this person was like, oh, that's interesting, and
Speaker 1: then she like couldn't handle it. She was like judging
Speaker 1: us for having met on an app. No, that is
Speaker 1: a that saying you met online was embarrassing in two
Speaker 1: thousand and three, and before then we were so confused.
Speaker 1: The only way people meet now if you've met in person.
Speaker 1: That is when I go, h, what you met a
Speaker 1: stranger out in the real world, like at the grocery
Speaker 1: store in line, Like why are you talking to someone
Speaker 1: in line? Get on your be on your phone and
Speaker 1: mind your business, like that is the that is the
Speaker 1: weird thing now. So this woman couldn't handle it, okay,
Speaker 1: and then we're like, yo, let me have to continue
Speaker 1: the conversation with her when she clearly just outwardly judged
Speaker 1: us to our face and we're like, yeah, we met
Speaker 1: on his miserable and old was she She was probably
Speaker 1: late twenties or early thirties. I think it was. I
Speaker 1: think it had to do with the fact that she
Speaker 1: was well to do. Yeah, I forgot about the well
Speaker 1: to do part. Yeah that in her world, Like that
Speaker 1: really is an embarrassment. You didn't meet at your father's
Speaker 1: country club, didn't meet at your local plane much. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you weren't. It wasn't arranged for you by you know,
Speaker 1: by two of your wealthy aunts. Well, okay, so when
Speaker 1: you say you met on Hinge, what is the story there, like,
Speaker 1: because I do want to know. I'm kind of interested.
Speaker 1: We have five minutes till the end of this break,
Speaker 1: let's get to it. So you met on Hinge? Hinge
Speaker 1: is the one where it's like you have friends in common,
Speaker 1: but you can pretty much find someone in common with
Speaker 1: anyone that you have. Shit. Really, I mean, after like
Speaker 1: three days, you no longer have enough friends to have
Speaker 1: anybody in common with who you're matching with. Got it?
Speaker 1: Even with all of your friends on each of the
Speaker 1: coasts that you have that you have to separate your parties. Yeah,
Speaker 1: all ten friends? No, what was your mutual friend with?
Speaker 1: We didn't have a mutual friend. There was no They
Speaker 1: just started giving you what was it about her profile?
Speaker 1: Because Hinge has you know, I think most of them
Speaker 1: do this now, but back in the day Hinge when
Speaker 1: I was on, it always had fun question prompt questions,
Speaker 1: and then you put up a picture and you could
Speaker 1: just like each other's photo as opposed to like being
Speaker 1: like I want to date you. I'm swiping right, you
Speaker 1: just like like a photo? Yes, and well that This
Speaker 1: is why anyone who's creative excels on Hinge because instead
Speaker 1: of just swiping, you have to you comment on the photo,
Speaker 1: and so you have to come up with something remotely
Speaker 1: interesting to say in the comments in order to get
Speaker 1: matched back. You can't just swipe and then hope. And
Speaker 1: you can't just and if you comment on the photo
Speaker 1: like hey or what's up, that's not good enough. No. No.
Speaker 1: And someone wrote to me recently because I said on
Speaker 1: the podcast that if you are on Bumble Girls, just
Speaker 1: send an emoji. Never write like hey, what's up? Don't
Speaker 1: write anything because bumble Girls have to reach out first.
Speaker 1: But just do an emoji, because guys don't really like
Speaker 1: you to make the first move. They want just you
Speaker 1: to like, look at them, so send it emoji. But
Speaker 1: this girl wrote to me and goes The emoji thing
Speaker 1: has been working for me so much, So many conversations
Speaker 1: have popped off because I send it emoji. She was like,
Speaker 1: but they never ask me out. And that's the thing
Speaker 1: that I think on dating apps that a lot of
Speaker 1: people run into, based on what I read on Reddit
Speaker 1: from dating advice, is that people don't ask people out.
Speaker 1: And I used to do this too on dating apps.
Speaker 1: I would match with people and then I would just
Speaker 1: like not want to go out with them because I
Speaker 1: just because I just wanted the validation that people liked me.
Speaker 1: I wasn't really wanting intimacy because or meeting up in person.
Speaker 1: And you used to be on the apps, like did
Speaker 1: you ever struggle with men like not asking you out
Speaker 1: or not like setting a date or taking it from
Speaker 1: just conversating too Yeah. I remember like taking it to
Speaker 1: therapy and being like, am I doing something wrong? And
Speaker 1: my therapist is like, yeah, you're chatting for too long,
Speaker 1: Like three or four volleys is enough? Like if the
Speaker 1: person doesn't ask you out by then, or if you
Speaker 1: don't say like do you want to get together? Which
Speaker 1: I never took her advice on that because she was wrong.
Speaker 1: She'd be like, just be done. You know none of that.
Speaker 1: This isn't a chat app. You're not like here to
Speaker 1: make penal friends. And then if you go on forever
Speaker 1: like that and I do the same thing, you know
Speaker 1: I would. I would definitely like just turned in into
Speaker 1: like let's get to know each other, and then you
Speaker 1: have nothing to talk about on your date when you
Speaker 1: finally go on it, because you've you've done all the cursory,
Speaker 1: like what do you do? What do you like? Like
Speaker 1: so how quickly did you ask Alli out? Because I'm
Speaker 1: guessing you asked her out? Well, by then I was
Speaker 1: like an online dating expert and I had this Ryan
Speaker 1: was so so I mean, Brian, there's so many layers
Speaker 1: to this guy. But Brian was like very adamant about
Speaker 1: finding a partner and like, oh my god, you were
Speaker 1: you have you? He had a system of his like
Speaker 1: that there pillars in his life, and one of the
Speaker 1: pillars was finding like a wife, like finding a woman.
Speaker 1: I treat everything like that, you know, like there when
Speaker 1: I try to find a therapist, I go to like
Speaker 1: five six therapists. There was a time when I had
Speaker 1: five therapists at the same time, and I was waiting
Speaker 1: to see which one would pops which one asked me
Speaker 1: how first it was just because we're just chatting. It
Speaker 1: so chatting for an hour. We would chat for an hour.
Speaker 1: So um, when you met Ali? I mean this was
Speaker 1: at the end of like years of online dating and
Speaker 1: going on multiple dates a week. Yes, there was a year,
Speaker 1: the Year of Dating I call it, where I went
Speaker 1: on dates with over fifty different women and multiple dates
Speaker 1: for many of them. So it was like on a ridge.
Speaker 1: It was like a few dates a week. And there
Speaker 1: was a time when I would go on multiple dates
Speaker 1: at night. Oh my god, would you make for all
Speaker 1: these or would you guys go dodge? Or what it
Speaker 1: would be? I would always go on. The date would
Speaker 1: always be drinks at a bar, and so if I
Speaker 1: paid for oh yeah, and also I don't drink, So
Speaker 1: I would go to these bars and let's get drinks,
Speaker 1: and then I would pretend to drink the beer. Right,
Speaker 1: that's what's called the beer. And one time I had
Speaker 1: a bartender. I got there early, I had a beer
Speaker 1: and I said to the bartender, can listen. I don't drink.
Speaker 1: And this is a first date can you like help
Speaker 1: me get rid of this beer? So it looks like
Speaker 1: I drank it, And so the bartender was like yeah, man,
Speaker 1: And so I was on this date and then the
Speaker 1: bartender like when the person wasn't looking, would take my
Speaker 1: beer and pour it out a little bit. Oh my god,
Speaker 1: is so funny. Yeah, well, you're really bringing your authentic
Speaker 1: self to these yeats by the way, Well, I felt
Speaker 1: like they would they wouldn't want to get they would
Speaker 1: judge you. Well, but discuss what you were dating girls
Speaker 1: in their twenties who like, were not secure enough to
Speaker 1: probably go on dates and not get a little bit drunk,
Speaker 1: because that's what dating in your twenties is, right, Yes, um,
Speaker 1: but Ali, what did you guys do on your first
Speaker 1: day date? What about what about your what about her profile?
Speaker 1: Did you say anything? Do you remember it? Do you
Speaker 1: remember or was it just one of another? Like I
Speaker 1: remember seeing her on Hinge and I was like, there's
Speaker 1: just no way she is going to respond to my
Speaker 1: message because she was so beautiful. I was like, there's
Speaker 1: no way. And then I made a comment she was
Speaker 1: she had like a pirate so beautiful. She had a
Speaker 1: pirate costume on this she had a pirate costume on,
Speaker 1: and she was wearing an eyepatch and the eye patch
Speaker 1: was a little bit a jar. And all I said was, um,
Speaker 1: a jar. It was a jar. And all I said
Speaker 1: was it was askew. That's what I meant. Okay, a
Speaker 1: jar was like it's slightly open. Yeah, probably was. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it was slightly open and it was a skew. And
Speaker 1: I said, are you a pirate full time? Or is
Speaker 1: that your side hustle? That was my comment. So you
Speaker 1: see what I'm saying. You have to be just like
Speaker 1: a little bit clever. Well, yeah, you should have been,
Speaker 1: but a little bit. It was a nice try. I
Speaker 1: cannot feel Okay, so she already probably liked you. I
Speaker 1: got the but I got the inside scoop since then,
Speaker 1: because this is why you're You're you're setting me up
Speaker 1: against other comedians in terms of being interesting. Like that
Speaker 1: comment is like a ten out of ten compared to
Speaker 1: my god, you're so right, you're so right. The gen
Speaker 1: pop is not capable of that of Yeah, even so
Speaker 1: getting the word a jar wrong, no, yeah, they don't
Speaker 1: even know that word even much less even able to
Speaker 1: use it wrong incorrectly. Okay, that's right. Um, and so
Speaker 1: she told me that. I was like, so, what did
Speaker 1: most people say when unhinged to you? And she said, well,
Speaker 1: most people would say, and I would hate this is
Speaker 1: they would go, hey, you're patches on wrong. That would
Speaker 1: be their first comment. Yeah, yeah, that's a nag kind
Speaker 1: of like again, was like, are you a part time
Speaker 1: pirate or just are you a pirate full time? Or
Speaker 1: is it your side hustle? Okay, yeah, yeah, it's good
Speaker 1: all right, And so that kicked it off. And then
Speaker 1: you asked her out right, yeah, because I mean that
Speaker 1: it couldn't get too chatty. And the thing was we lived, Um,
Speaker 1: she lived in on the west side and I lived
Speaker 1: on the east side, and in in normal people, that's
Speaker 1: like separate bachelor partist. That's like, that's like living in
Speaker 1: a different state if you're in LA. I mean it's
Speaker 1: it's almost like, why would you even have your hinge
Speaker 1: to go to those areas because this is going to work. Yeah,
Speaker 1: And she had her uh her radius set to like
Speaker 1: fifty miles by accident. Yeah, And so it was like
Speaker 1: she and so for like one week she accidentally had
Speaker 1: it open and I always had mine open as wide
Speaker 1: as possible. I was like I'll drive anywhere. Yeah, and
Speaker 1: we matched and um yeah and uh then she like
Speaker 1: disappeared for a little bit and I was like, of course,
Speaker 1: she disappeared, like she's not going to continue talking to me.
Speaker 1: And then one day she messaged me back after like
Speaker 1: two weeks and was like, oh, hey, she just wasn't
Speaker 1: checking the app. And then we went on a date.
Speaker 1: Um at a at a lesson. Two girls seemed disinterested.
Speaker 1: Don't be too needy. Well cool, she just she wasn't
Speaker 1: even trying. She just was cool. Yes, exactly. And your
Speaker 1: your emoji comment is one hundred percent correct, like just
Speaker 1: send an emoji guy. Don't do anything like you don't
Speaker 1: have to do anything. Guys will come after you, Yes,
Speaker 1: yes they will. Well, last night, Anya uh discovered something
Speaker 1: on the show. She's watching The Bachelor and boiler alert
Speaker 1: if you don't want to hear if you haven't seen
Speaker 1: the latest episode. But it's down to him picking the
Speaker 1: final two. There were three girls left. They all went
Speaker 1: to the fantasy suite, which is where you could possibly
Speaker 1: have sex. It's kind of like in the air. Now
Speaker 1: what happened exactly? Anya? So he decides the Bachelor decides
Speaker 1: I'm going to go into this week without sex being
Speaker 1: on the table, and he tells each woman this at
Speaker 1: the start of dating the bed. No not on tables,
Speaker 1: no sex on tables. So with Girl number one, he's like,
Speaker 1: just so you know, I want sex to be off
Speaker 1: the table this week. And then they cut to her
Speaker 1: in review and she's like, that was sort of a
Speaker 1: disappointment and I don't like being told what's not going
Speaker 1: to happen. And she's very sexual too, and she's like
Speaker 1: this beautiful Russian girl and they have tons of chemistry.
Speaker 1: She's like a knockout too, and she's like, we'll see
Speaker 1: about that. Well, you know. Anyway, they have a date
Speaker 1: and you find out afterwards they did not have sex,
Speaker 1: and so he moves on to Girl number two. She's
Speaker 1: very shy. Yeah, they hang the sheet outside after and
Speaker 1: there was not a blood stain upon it. So Chris Harrison, oh,
Speaker 1: he's on the show anymore. That other guy that looks
Speaker 1: like all the bachelors said they did not have sex, Okay,
Speaker 1: they didn't tell. When the bachelor told that guy, Jesse
Speaker 1: his plan, you could just see in Jesse's eyes, which
Speaker 1: are pretty blank anyway, he was just fighting this urge
Speaker 1: to be like, dude, no bad idea, And so he
Speaker 1: goes on date number two with this very like sort
Speaker 1: of mentally fragile girl. She has bad h adhd. She's
Speaker 1: very insecure. They have a lot of chemistry though, but
Speaker 1: she's like shy and anyway, same thing. He tells her
Speaker 1: his intentions no sex. She's cut to her interview. She's like,
Speaker 1: I don't know about that. We'll see if I can
Speaker 1: convince him to otherwise. I kind of think sex is
Speaker 1: important or whatever. Then after their date, cut to them
Speaker 1: snuggling in the morning and you do an interview with
Speaker 1: her one on one and she's like, we had a
Speaker 1: great cuddle fest and big smile, So you're like, did
Speaker 1: they I think they did have sex. Then cut to
Speaker 1: the bachelor and he's like, we had an amazing night.
Speaker 1: But I changed my mind and it became evident that,
Speaker 1: like my rule was not going to fly, and we
Speaker 1: both decided, as adults, we wanted to take this further,
Speaker 1: and we did. But now I'm in a quandary. I
Speaker 1: gotta tell I gotta tell girl number three what I
Speaker 1: did because I told Girl number three no sex, right,
Speaker 1: he actually hadn't. He had only told each woman so
Speaker 1: far that he had seen and got it. Okay, so
Speaker 1: we can Jest see. The host is like why do
Speaker 1: He's like, you don't really, you're gonna tell him, but
Speaker 1: you're going to tell her, and he goes, I have
Speaker 1: to be transparent with all the women, and Jesse's just
Speaker 1: like okay. So he goes on date number three, which
Speaker 1: is in a fucking swamp in Thailand, like the worst setting.
Speaker 1: It's in a river, but it's like, oh, cold, dank
Speaker 1: river and it's getting darker and darker by the second,
Speaker 1: and they're in this horrible canoe. Anyway, he tells her
Speaker 1: and she's not crazy. He goes, I wanted this to
Speaker 1: be a no sex week for everybody, and I kind
Speaker 1: of fucked up and just left with the last girl.
Speaker 1: She's horror fied and she's like, I know what this
Speaker 1: week is. I didn't need to know this, and now
Speaker 1: like this is the beginning of our date, like I
Speaker 1: can't be psyched. This is a bummer, Like you didn't
Speaker 1: need to tell me this. This is between you and
Speaker 1: all the women you know, and it's just awkward and
Speaker 1: terrible and it's just getting darker and darker. Is he
Speaker 1: apologizing now? Or is this her saying this off camera
Speaker 1: of like I didn't even know this, or is she
Speaker 1: saying that to him? She's saying that to him, He's
Speaker 1: awkwardly like trying to hug her. It's the she just
Speaker 1: does not want to be there. He feels kind of dumb,
Speaker 1: but he keeps trying to be like, I'm an honest person,
Speaker 1: though I would think that you would want this, like
Speaker 1: I'm being transparent. She's like, no, I don't need to
Speaker 1: know all this, you know, And she's like, I don't
Speaker 1: really what did you expect me to just be like,
Speaker 1: oh great, like let's have a fun date. Like I'm
Speaker 1: not happy. She just kept saying I'm not happy and
Speaker 1: I can't sound I feel like if any person that
Speaker 1: you could ever relate to, it would be this woman.
Speaker 1: I liked her because I actually am afraid to say
Speaker 1: all right, have been in the past, afraid to just
Speaker 1: say my feelings very simply. And she just kept being like,
Speaker 1: I'm just not happy, and she kept repeating, and I
Speaker 1: was like, that's pretty powerful to just own that, yeah,
Speaker 1: Like why would you be happy anyway? Then she snaps
Speaker 1: out of it after a few hours. They go on
Speaker 1: their date later that night, they get out of the swamp,
Speaker 1: they get cleaned up, they go to dinner. Somehow this
Speaker 1: woman's out of total one eighty and she's like, you
Speaker 1: know what, I am so into you. I'm falling in
Speaker 1: love with you. Let bygones be bygones, don't care. Let's
Speaker 1: have a fun night. She pulled the nicky glazer. I
Speaker 1: think Nikky would do that of like let me just
Speaker 1: re reset, like yeah, you know, power down and power
Speaker 1: back up, Like yeah, let's get the political Okay, You're
Speaker 1: like logical, I know what show I'm on, Like, well,
Speaker 1: thank you. That's very nice of you to that reminds
Speaker 1: you of me. Yeah, I was like, this girl's kind
Speaker 1: of practical. I've always thought this girl, Katie was the
Speaker 1: best match for this boring guy, Jake the Bachelor, whatever
Speaker 1: his name is, I forgot anyway, they this whole show.
Speaker 1: You don't even know his name. That's out bloring. This
Speaker 1: dude was. I think I watched the first episode and
Speaker 1: I go because I was like, I'm gonna get back
Speaker 1: into the Bachelor. I couldn't care less about this guy.
Speaker 1: This guy was so boring. He didn't deserve all these
Speaker 1: women to be falling over him. He was just he's
Speaker 1: kind of adult. But he's tall and hot, right yeah,
Speaker 1: like he's a formerly fat person, so he's very he's
Speaker 1: very kind and emotionally mature, I think, but he's a
Speaker 1: little I think it's passive aggressive. He's got some rage
Speaker 1: in there. But anyway, I'll wrap this up. So they
Speaker 1: have date number three together. It's unclear whether they've slept
Speaker 1: together until all three women are lined up the next
Speaker 1: day at the rose ceremony, at which point he I'm
Speaker 1: gonna spoil this completely now he eliminates the no no
Speaker 1: no oh, yeah, he start no no, he eliminates um
Speaker 1: number one. Right, yeah, that correct. She's very mature about there, goodbye.
Speaker 1: It's kind of amazing, and you know, she's like it
Speaker 1: was incredible, meaning you goodbye, and they have a hug goodbye.
Speaker 1: He comes back and then but as he's saying breaking
Speaker 1: up with the Russian girl, these two were together holding
Speaker 1: their roses and Katie Girl number three looks to girl
Speaker 1: number two, who has slept with the bachelor, and she goes,
Speaker 1: I knew. Under her breath, she goes, I knew you'd
Speaker 1: be the only one, meaning I know you'd be the
Speaker 1: only one he's slept with, So now we know Katie
Speaker 1: did not sleep with him. And then they're standing there,
Speaker 1: but the girl who slept with him, I wish I
Speaker 1: could remember her name. She looks furious. She's pissed off.
Speaker 1: I forgot to mention, she told the producers on camera.
Speaker 1: In her one on one interview, she's like, I feel
Speaker 1: completely blindsided because Jake came to tell her the next day,
Speaker 1: like I'm going to tell all the women what we've done.
Speaker 1: And she's like no, no, no no, no, no, no no no,
Speaker 1: this was our thing, Like this is private, and he's like, no,
Speaker 1: I think it's really important to be transparent with everybody else.
Speaker 1: Why was she blindsided if he told her that he
Speaker 1: was going to tell him. I good question. I think
Speaker 1: they must have had an agreement during the sex or
Speaker 1: their little private night together, like let's just nact on
Speaker 1: between us, got it? Yes? And she's like, now you
Speaker 1: show up at my house with all these cameras telling
Speaker 1: me like, hey, we fucked, let's tell America. And she's like,
Speaker 1: I wanted to be a little more subtle about it,
Speaker 1: and so he signed up to me on the Bachelor,
Speaker 1: so right. But she also she's like, I didn't. I
Speaker 1: didn't know. We're telling everybody, yeah, yeah, But the most
Speaker 1: interesting part is he comes back from the can we
Speaker 1: do leave this as a cliffhanger and come back and
Speaker 1: tell everyone because this does end in a way that
Speaker 1: there's a reason I asked on you to tell a story,
Speaker 1: because we're going to come back after this and find
Speaker 1: out why. All right, we're back. So he comes back
Speaker 1: after letting the first girl go, the two remaining girls,
Speaker 1: one of whom just goes, I knew you'd be the
Speaker 1: only one, meaning the only one he slept with. So
Speaker 1: she knows girl who slept with him is horrified that
Speaker 1: he has told this girl and that now her secret
Speaker 1: that she slept with the bachelor is out. And then
Speaker 1: what happens. Then Jake is only making eye contact with Katie,
Speaker 1: the woman he has yet number three, Girl number three,
Speaker 1: and he's just like, next week is going to be
Speaker 1: so great, meeting your family's just tunnel vision on. Katie
Speaker 1: has completely forgotten about the other woman that he had
Speaker 1: this very special night with, and all we see is
Speaker 1: cutting back to the girl, Girl number two, who's furious,
Speaker 1: pissed off and is staring at both of them like,
Speaker 1: all right, I'm just a third wheel here. He's already
Speaker 1: moved past her, he's over it. He's like focused on Katie,
Speaker 1: and it made me think of coming Now, Why Anya,
Speaker 1: you've synthesized this pretty well last night I was texting
Speaker 1: with you about it because you were filling me in.
Speaker 1: Why do you think he wasn't? And it's not just
Speaker 1: about that he's slept with her and he's bored with
Speaker 1: someone he's slept with already and he's already conquered it.
Speaker 1: What is it about a guy sleeping with someone who
Speaker 1: isn't um their actual boyfriend that makes this? Why do
Speaker 1: you think he liked her less? I think he didn't
Speaker 1: earn her. He didn't earn it. Really, it was too
Speaker 1: easy to come by. Still, he was still dating three
Speaker 1: women when she said, fine, I'll give you the one
Speaker 1: thing that is SA is supposed to be sacred, and
Speaker 1: I know some women are like, it's not sacred. I
Speaker 1: love sex. I want to give Men look at it
Speaker 1: as a sacred thing. They want to earn it, and
Speaker 1: as much as they beg for it and convince themselves
Speaker 1: that they want it whenever they can get it, they
Speaker 1: really want it when they've earned it. And they will
Speaker 1: only really stick around afterwards if they feel like they've
Speaker 1: earned it. And you're right, he didn't feel like he
Speaker 1: earned it because he didn't. He was dating three women
Speaker 1: still and they I'm sure they did make an adult
Speaker 1: decision together, and I'm sure the moment was great, but
Speaker 1: the problem is it wasn't an exclusive relationship yet. And
Speaker 1: the problem is women more than men, have this oxytocin
Speaker 1: thing that happens where even though we feel amazing in
Speaker 1: the moment and the sex was great and everything, if
Speaker 1: you break up with us after and choose someone else,
Speaker 1: it is heartbreaking. It is heartbreaking, Like it is hard
Speaker 1: to get over that because we're already bonded somewhat. We
Speaker 1: don't just shake it off, you know what I mean.
Speaker 1: Do you think he's still into this number three girl
Speaker 1: because she um, she's still like he hasn't gotten everything
Speaker 1: that he wants from her yet, and he really has
Speaker 1: gotten I mean, sex is kind of like it's done
Speaker 1: with them. I actually don't and maybe that's a controversial point,
Speaker 1: but I actually think he like he's always liked her
Speaker 1: a little. I think they have a deeper connection and
Speaker 1: like a more lasting connection, and she's a little less
Speaker 1: of a wild card than girl number two. Girl number
Speaker 1: two has some like problems, you know, so you're a
Speaker 1: little worried about her. I think, yeah, Like, they don't
Speaker 1: think it's going to go towards her. She's great, but
Speaker 1: they just don't have the solid chances the chances she
Speaker 1: wins percentage wise the girl number two to me, Wow,
Speaker 1: low percentage Okay, okay, so it still could happen. Not likely,
Speaker 1: just my opinion. Yeah, do you think if she didn't
Speaker 1: sleep with him that he would have been less? Like?
Speaker 1: Do you think that was a factor. Do you really
Speaker 1: believe that that of him being more focused on number three?
Speaker 1: I think it's a factor. Yeah, But I think that
Speaker 1: ultimately the connection is better with the third girl. I
Speaker 1: just think that they shouldn't have had sex because the
Speaker 1: girl's going to be heartbroken. Yes, I so much more
Speaker 1: than if she didn't. I read all the time in
Speaker 1: dating advice on Reddit of Girls saying I slept with
Speaker 1: this guy. We had been dating five weeks. I finally
Speaker 1: stop with him, and I haven't heard from him. He
Speaker 1: went away for a week and he said he'd call
Speaker 1: me when he got back to town, and I haven't
Speaker 1: heard from him. Since and I slept with him the
Speaker 1: night before he left. Why haven't I? And it's always
Speaker 1: like I want to just get in there and go
Speaker 1: read Getting two. I do read Getting two, I do
Speaker 1: read like and it's the worst name for a book.
Speaker 1: But it just sleeping with guys too soon before commitment
Speaker 1: is always a bad idea, It just is. So the
Speaker 1: thing Jake said, if that is his name, was he
Speaker 1: goes it was very important to our relationship to make
Speaker 1: that decision. It was important to further our relationship. And
Speaker 1: I don't think that's the reason she had sex. Like
Speaker 1: he thinks for them, it was really good for them,
Speaker 1: it got them farther along. But I don't think that's
Speaker 1: the reason she had I've had sex with guys because
Speaker 1: I think that it's going to get us farther along,
Speaker 1: and that that's the next step. It's like that's going
Speaker 1: to push our relationship. Once we've had sex, now he's
Speaker 1: going to almost feel more close to me. But it doesn't.
Speaker 1: It doesn't. He's like he's like to Jake, I think
Speaker 1: it means it's getting a step closer to where Katie
Speaker 1: and I are girl number three, right, you know, like
Speaker 1: they're now built intimacy, and it does think Girl number
Speaker 1: two had any idea of that. Girls have sex early
Speaker 1: on and it comes from like insecurity, and they think
Speaker 1: that it'll move the relationship further head. That's why I've
Speaker 1: done it too. I've done it because I'm like they,
Speaker 1: because we only know our own experience, and I know
Speaker 1: that when I have sex, I feel much closer with one.
Speaker 1: It does. It does up my intimacy. It does that
Speaker 1: for me, but it does not work the same way
Speaker 1: with men. Brian, can you weigh in on this at all?
Speaker 1: It removes them the awkwardness that you have during the
Speaker 1: date of like am I gonna kiss you? Or can
Speaker 1: how you know, touchy feely? Can we be so? Like
Speaker 1: if you have sex then afterwards, that removes a lot
Speaker 1: of the awkwardness. But I will say I've never had
Speaker 1: like a one night stand that I appreciated, you know,
Speaker 1: like the earlier the worst in my opinion, Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: um explain why? Yeah? Well, I think the first time
Speaker 1: you have sex with somebody, it's it's already horrible, no
Speaker 1: matter what. It's so awkward, no matter Yeah, I don't
Speaker 1: think that it makes it better. I've had sex with
Speaker 1: people and then I go on a date and we're like,
Speaker 1: we don't know when we can touch each other. I'm like,
Speaker 1: I was like, my mouth was inches from your asshole?
Speaker 1: Why is it? Why are we like picking out our
Speaker 1: food and being so awkward like this is It doesn't
Speaker 1: necessarily make things that much easier. Alcohol does, But until
Speaker 1: that would to my blood stream, it was still awkward.
Speaker 1: You can't enter that state again, like right out of
Speaker 1: the gate um. But yet to tell me a little
Speaker 1: bit more about why you think it sects me as
Speaker 1: soon as not great? I mean, I can't tell I
Speaker 1: can't speak for all men because I don't feel like
Speaker 1: I'm a typical Okay, well, I think guys the truth
Speaker 1: about from the West coast Man. Yeah, well the West
Speaker 1: coast Man is just flowing with it and he's like,
Speaker 1: you know, whatever happens happens, which I hate. Um, the
Speaker 1: East coast Man is trying to conquer. So I think
Speaker 1: it depends on what coast demands from. But I think
Speaker 1: like the earlier you do it, the the more things
Speaker 1: that you can discover about the person that you don't like. Honestly.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, yeah, one time, one time, I during my
Speaker 1: year of dating, I uh, I slept with some woman
Speaker 1: early and um, while while we were resting, she she
Speaker 1: commented that my shoulders didn't have enough hair on them. M.
Speaker 1: She said, do you about yourself? She's like, do you
Speaker 1: shave your shoulders? And I was like no, but I
Speaker 1: did get famously with Tim Convey. I did get a
Speaker 1: laser hair removal on my back and shoulders, so there's
Speaker 1: less hair on my shoulders than my than my arms.
Speaker 1: And she was like and she was like, that's hysterical,
Speaker 1: and I was like, well, I definitely don't want to
Speaker 1: date you if the first time. Yeah, we're doing that.
Speaker 1: You're shaming your body, shaming about my shoulder hair, and
Speaker 1: you know what that is. That's just her feeling really
Speaker 1: insecure and needing to call out the things. She's so
Speaker 1: worried you're gonna do that to her. She's doing it
Speaker 1: to you before you can get to her. Yeah, I
Speaker 1: think that's what. And then she went she dated some
Speaker 1: surf instructor and I was like, there's nobody he's got
Speaker 1: hair on his shoulders. Now there's hairless. They're hair lessons. Yeah. Um.
Speaker 1: Final thought, Um, okay, so we can we get some
Speaker 1: fan traxes? Is that what we have today. Yeah, I
Speaker 1: do have some of you want to look. Okay, let's
Speaker 1: do some fanthrax. Yeah, okay, that really got me today
Speaker 1: for some reason. Okay, let's hear what some besties have
Speaker 1: to say. Okay, let's start off with a voicemail from Hadley. Hello,
Speaker 1: I'm listening to the most recent episode where you talk
Speaker 1: about the Reddit post of the people finding the creamatory
Speaker 1: smoke in the daytime, and it just made me think
Speaker 1: of my hometown. We had a funeral home that was
Speaker 1: across the street from a local high school, and the
Speaker 1: weights room was right across the street, and they would
Speaker 1: open the window to work out, and they would have
Speaker 1: to shut it in the morning because specifically in the morning,
Speaker 1: they would burn the bodies and the smoke would come
Speaker 1: out and it was really pungent and smelly, and so
Speaker 1: they would have to keep the window closed. That's been
Speaker 1: like a thing forever. The juicier part about the story
Speaker 1: is that the funeral home was recently shut down and
Speaker 1: condemned because the owner was mishandling the bodies. Oh God,
Speaker 1: there was a complaint of a smell like a block away.
Speaker 1: They did an investigation. They found several like rotting bodies,
Speaker 1: it's really disgusting and disrespectful and hard to talk about.
Speaker 1: But fetuses that had no connection to anyone, and they
Speaker 1: have also suspected necrophilia, and he was going to trial
Speaker 1: and probably going to jail. So you should look that
Speaker 1: up because it's a really interesting case. Also makes me
Speaker 1: think about a Twitter thread I saw today of morticians
Speaker 1: talking about how they don't like to hire men because
Speaker 1: they get caught fucking the bodies so we're never safe. Um, okay, cool, no,
Speaker 1: thank you, Hadley. This is not surprising. Again, male guynecologists
Speaker 1: like get men out of men are by and large
Speaker 1: more sexually erratic and motivated to do weird stuff. So
Speaker 1: if you want to have things not get fucked, don't
Speaker 1: hire men no offense. Like of course you wouldn't, most
Speaker 1: men wouldn't, but like you women, fewer women would be
Speaker 1: motivated to fuck up a dead corpse. Then. I mean,
Speaker 1: I used to have a boyfriend that you know, and
Speaker 1: college stuck is dick in like a peanut butter jar,
Speaker 1: like just to see what it was like. Men do
Speaker 1: weird stuff, they're motivated, their hormones are going crazy, and um, yeah,
Speaker 1: that's really disturbing. I have to maintain though that I
Speaker 1: wouldn't mind if someone tried to fuck me when I
Speaker 1: was dead. I would be almost I don't think it's
Speaker 1: a respectful thing. I'm horrified by that. Um that message.
Speaker 1: But if you are a mortician out there creamator or
Speaker 1: um and you come across my body, you can't fuck it. Um.
Speaker 1: If I'm dead, I don't care. I don't think dead
Speaker 1: parents would sign off on that. Well, they don't get to.
Speaker 1: I'm in charge of my dead body. I get to
Speaker 1: say I this is in my living will and my
Speaker 1: dead one. I don't care if you try to fuck
Speaker 1: me because I'm dead, But I still don't think it's
Speaker 1: right to do a matter why an age? Oh oh man,
Speaker 1: that's that's an interesting one. Noah wow, okay, um, you
Speaker 1: are like this is almost dealing with the thing of pedophilia,
Speaker 1: where they're like, well if they make dummies of kids, like,
Speaker 1: is it okay? I'm saying from this age and beyond.
Speaker 1: Oh um. No. If someone wants to fuck my old
Speaker 1: body when I'm like ninety and die like also fine,
Speaker 1: they can fuck it at anytime because I'm dead. Again,
Speaker 1: if it's before the open casket, I'd ask you to
Speaker 1: have a little respect for my head, Like let's like
Speaker 1: keep my head looking okay and not with like come
Speaker 1: all over it, like don't really fuck it up, but
Speaker 1: the rest of my body go at it, don't care. Um,
Speaker 1: have fun. He wouldn't just let you go out there covered.
Speaker 1: He would wipe it off. No, but I feel like
Speaker 1: it would like dent, like it would just like mush
Speaker 1: my skin, Like my face already is dead, Like I
Speaker 1: don't need like them like humping my face, like it
Speaker 1: would just just don't don't do it to my face. Yeah, okay,
Speaker 1: if this is the least I can ask for, and
Speaker 1: I have teeth still, I'm guessing when I die. Um,
Speaker 1: but that was a fascinating story. And it would be
Speaker 1: so weird to be working out and then all of
Speaker 1: a sudden, your grandpa's ashes like fly in the room.
Speaker 1: You're like heaving and hoeing as you're trying to like
Speaker 1: do have lat pull or whatever. Um, oh my god,
Speaker 1: that's curious at all. When she said I forgot the
Speaker 1: word a stred but like punging about pungent, Like I
Speaker 1: wonder what it smells like. Um, it smells like corpses. Oh,
Speaker 1: really pungent. It makes me think of like tangy and
Speaker 1: like like rotting pungent. Yeah, yeah, I mean that's what
Speaker 1: they always say, people that have smelled a dead body,
Speaker 1: which I've never smelled a dead human body to my knowledge,
Speaker 1: but people that have smelled it say it's the most unforgettable,
Speaker 1: awful scent ever. Have you, guys, ever smelled a dead body? Yes?
Speaker 1: I lived, you have I know a dead human I
Speaker 1: lived in a house where a neighbor passed away and
Speaker 1: they and we found out because of the smell. Oh
Speaker 1: so you sometimes sometimes you die and you have no
Speaker 1: one and then you just sit there in your living
Speaker 1: room until someone smells it, until someone smells it. Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 1: I was on the subway, um, coming home from a
Speaker 1: Guns and Roses concert. It wasn't really Guns and Roses.
Speaker 1: It was just like them like reuniting in like this
Speaker 1: new band, and there was a homeless man on the
Speaker 1: subway and it's like a like this like sour chemical smell. Yeah,
Speaker 1: train smelled it. If you can you still smell it now,
Speaker 1: like if you Yes, that's that's what they describe it as.
Speaker 1: I'm so grateful I have never smelled it again. Um, well,
Speaker 1: I hope you smell it soon for that guy who
Speaker 1: kills possums. Fuck that guy, Oh my god, who's tortures possums.
Speaker 1: I hope that guy that smell admits from his house soon.
Speaker 1: I hope someone traps him and lets him just fucking
Speaker 1: die in the cage. Hate that asshole so much. Literally,
Speaker 1: I hope he dies um okay next to Fantrax. Okay,
Speaker 1: let's uh hate him. Sorry, aunty U just listening to
Speaker 1: the episode where Nikki you were talking about how used
Speaker 1: to go into chat rooms in like the late nineties
Speaker 1: and talk to those wolf people and kind of make
Speaker 1: fun of that. But it made me think about how
Speaker 1: when I was like fourteen with my best friend Sarah Jones,
Speaker 1: we would go into those chat rooms and we were
Speaker 1: talking to this guy and his name was Ryan Sarge,
Speaker 1: and we used to like send him pictures and we
Speaker 1: would pretend like it was our pussies, but we was
Speaker 1: like our lips from our face, and we'd hold our
Speaker 1: hair in front of our lips and then scan it
Speaker 1: on my dad's scanner in his office, and then we'd
Speaker 1: send him those and pretend it was our pussy like
Speaker 1: you'd need to shave, And so we just stopped talking
Speaker 1: to him in chat rooms, love you uh juicy pussy.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, that's so funny. I get to see
Speaker 1: these little girls like slamming their faces into a scanner,
Speaker 1: like the dad's scanner, lifting up that screen and like
Speaker 1: it's clanking on their head as they just like smushed
Speaker 1: their faces. That I have one at home. Now I
Speaker 1: know what I'm doing with my afternoon. Yeah, O my god, Um,
Speaker 1: that is so funny. Did you ever um go on
Speaker 1: chat rooms? Brian? You're of the age? How old are
Speaker 1: you again? Thirty seven? Thirty five? And I have tell
Speaker 1: your face like two years? You know. I did actually
Speaker 1: get I got botox yesterday for my job. What's really
Speaker 1: I got? Bird? I got It's not for wrinkles. It's
Speaker 1: because I have excruciating pain in my jaw and they
Speaker 1: injected me with bowtime about dying? Yeah, well yes, because
Speaker 1: I clenched my teeth at night thinking about all the
Speaker 1: horror of non existing constantly. Sometimes wake up scream. This
Speaker 1: is the song Anti here, I wake up screaming from
Speaker 1: dreaming one day all watch as I'm leaving. That is
Speaker 1: so funny. Okay, so you got botox in your jaw.
Speaker 1: That's awesome. Oh yeah, and she feels so much better. Well,
Speaker 1: you know, I think it takes a few days to
Speaker 1: like kick in, but I have to say the first day.
Speaker 1: This is the first morning, and I do feel a
Speaker 1: little better. Yes, I feel better. That's cool. Yeah, I
Speaker 1: just got botox in my forehead because I forehead is Yeah,
Speaker 1: I've been stressing, screaming a rate that I've sleeped on
Speaker 1: my long way. Oh my god, that's exciting. Okay, so
Speaker 1: let's listen to then. Oh yeah, I was gonna ask
Speaker 1: you about chat rooms, but we'll talk about another time.
Speaker 1: Let's go to another fan rex. Okay, Um, do you
Speaker 1: want sad advice or like regular advice? Sad advice? Because
Speaker 1: I feel bad not saying sad advice like that would
Speaker 1: encourage you, not tell me sad things. All right, and
Speaker 1: I want to be Yeah, let's hello Nikki. Noah, Sorry
Speaker 1: in advanced my questions a bit of a sad one.
Speaker 1: I just wanted to pull the group on a money
Speaker 1: ish question since that's kind of been one of the
Speaker 1: topics as of late. When just thinking about how when
Speaker 1: Anya brought up yearly earnings versus what you would spend
Speaker 1: on a hotel room, for example, Yeah, my dog was
Speaker 1: diagnosed with cancer this week, So I'm just trying to
Speaker 1: wrap my head around what's an appropriate number, What is
Speaker 1: something that makes sense for a seven year old dog?
Speaker 1: He just seems so young. You know, we all expect
Speaker 1: to have a lot more time. That's not always the case.
Speaker 1: Ah he sorry, I'll say it again. He's seven years old.
Speaker 1: He's a bullmasted cross. He's about one hundred and thirty
Speaker 1: five pounds. He's got humanized I just want to hear
Speaker 1: what you ladies would do if you're in my shoes.
Speaker 1: I'm in Canada, so emo costs are a little bit
Speaker 1: higher down here for us anyways. Hoping sorry, he just snored.
Speaker 1: Hoping you guys can make this a little light and
Speaker 1: give some advice for me and anyone else who's been
Speaker 1: in my situation. What you think we should do? Oh?
Speaker 1: Jacked up? Pet bellum Man, I'm so sorry. Next to one,
Speaker 1: I'm just kidding this next question now, this sucks. I'm
Speaker 1: so so sorry. What is her name again? It's anonymous? Okay, um,
Speaker 1: I'm so sorry about your dog of seven years. It's
Speaker 1: fucking terrible. My sister's dog just had to be put
Speaker 1: down last week because of probably cancer issues like just
Speaker 1: tumors and um just too much complications. Also like a
Speaker 1: hundred and something pound dog um twelve years old, those
Speaker 1: so a little bit more life behind it to justify like, Okay,
Speaker 1: maybe it's time for it to go, so um, I
Speaker 1: can't you know, I wish I would have know, Like
Speaker 1: how much you like you shouldn't go homeless saving your dog?
Speaker 1: I don't think right like we have to that's I
Speaker 1: would financially, But then there's always like go fund means,
Speaker 1: and you're like, maybe I could get people to donate
Speaker 1: enough and do something like, um, try every avenue. I
Speaker 1: I would measure how horrible it would be for your
Speaker 1: dog to go through this, and what the outcome, how
Speaker 1: much life and what kind of what the quality of
Speaker 1: life would be for your dog. The nice thing about
Speaker 1: having animals, and I have to say that this, even
Speaker 1: though this is sad thing, you can euthanize them, unless
Speaker 1: unlike humans where you just have to wait for them
Speaker 1: to choke on their own vomit and die or like
Speaker 1: just die of old age. Like you can put them
Speaker 1: out of their misery and give them like a nice
Speaker 1: send off surrounded by like love, and they kind of
Speaker 1: just go to sleep and it's painless and it's humane,
Speaker 1: and that is like the cool thing that we get
Speaker 1: to do for our pets. So it's not as much
Speaker 1: as it is like a horrible thing like and that
Speaker 1: it is kind of your choice, and it feels like, oh,
Speaker 1: I'm choosing to kill my dog, like you're choosing to
Speaker 1: not have it suffer, as my thought, like a lot
Speaker 1: of people think that. Because I'm vegan, I never want
Speaker 1: dogs to like be put down or like cats and stuff.
Speaker 1: And I'm actually a big advocate for putting animals down
Speaker 1: when they're suffering or when they have to spend their
Speaker 1: lives in a small cage. I think they should. I
Speaker 1: think in a lot of ways it'd be better to
Speaker 1: just put them down because it's just the worst life
Speaker 1: to be lonely in a cage. So I just would
Speaker 1: weigh the suffering. And in terms of money, I mean,
Speaker 1: what do you what do you? What are your guys's thoughts.
Speaker 1: I think that definitely how much money she makes factors in.
Speaker 1: But I will say this, there is an option between
Speaker 1: putting the dog down and chemotherapy, and that is just
Speaker 1: letting nature take its course. I was visiting a farm
Speaker 1: one time, and they had this dog who had cancer
Speaker 1: for like four or five years and there was a
Speaker 1: tumor growing on its back that was literally the size
Speaker 1: of like a couch cushion. It was, it was like
Speaker 1: the size of it. It It was like crazy, like we'd
Speaker 1: see this thing and be like, isn't is that? Did
Speaker 1: you need to do something about that? And the and
Speaker 1: the farmer was like just letting it go. And the
Speaker 1: dog was perfectly happy. It had a tumor the size
Speaker 1: of a couch cushion, but it was running around, it
Speaker 1: was eating its food, it was still you know, and
Speaker 1: like that was like four or five years and d yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: and people were finding coins underneath it, and I'm with
Speaker 1: ban my friend just went through this with her dog,
Speaker 1: and um, you know, they did what they could and
Speaker 1: this is a very wealthy friend. But ultimately the dog
Speaker 1: just basically, you know, was living with cancer for a
Speaker 1: few years and they gave it a good sendoff and
Speaker 1: had the vet come to the house and euthanize it
Speaker 1: up thousand dollars to No, it's not that much, it's
Speaker 1: not that much. But I would also, yeah, like Nikki said,
Speaker 1: like what how much is this chemotherapy? How much is
Speaker 1: this in relation to it? You make do not feel
Speaker 1: badly if you have to make the choice to euthanize
Speaker 1: the dog, but also talked to about salary. Oh wait,
Speaker 1: that's a wedding ring. Talk to the vet about how
Speaker 1: how the dog's life would be if it could just
Speaker 1: live with this for yeah, yeah, there's no guarantee. Just
Speaker 1: because you're diagnosed with cancer does not mean you're gonna die.
Speaker 1: And you know too much for some reason, when I start,
Speaker 1: I remember not that long ago, like I just started.
Speaker 1: My world opened up, maybe on Instagram or something to
Speaker 1: people who just live with cancer, and they're just like,
Speaker 1: I have cancer for twenty years now. I'm like, wait, what,
Speaker 1: like you can I mean, I don't know anything about cancer,
Speaker 1: so I should just shut the fuck up. But yeah,
Speaker 1: I think that's an interesting option of just like letting
Speaker 1: nature take its course until life is so miserable for
Speaker 1: your dog and then doing what's necessary to like ease
Speaker 1: it's pain and send it off to the next realm
Speaker 1: that it will experience. If or you can get your
Speaker 1: dog to do DMT now and you guys can get
Speaker 1: together and you can both accept it. It's you'll be
Speaker 1: together in some other realm M Noah as someone who
Speaker 1: had a dog that died of cancer, right answer, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: what are your thoughts? So I think I'm like in
Speaker 1: between Brian and Anya. Definitely talk to the vet, see
Speaker 1: what the dog's quality of life is and also what
Speaker 1: your quality of life will be like. For example, with
Speaker 1: my dog Bruno, the tumor grew in a way where
Speaker 1: I would have to get him over to the hospital
Speaker 1: and they'd put a catheter to empty his bladder. So
Speaker 1: that was not like a thing I was going to
Speaker 1: do to keep my dog alive for another five years. UM. Also,
Speaker 1: I want to say that UM, I was very lucky
Speaker 1: because the doctor that UM in the emergency hospital of
Speaker 1: ERG in Brooklyn. He UM runs up like a pet
Speaker 1: rescue charity for people who can't afford medical expenses or
Speaker 1: UM rescuing um animals that don't have homes and stuff
Speaker 1: like that and providing them with medical treatment. And when
Speaker 1: I like, so, I would drive my dog Brunal like
Speaker 1: an hour and a half out of the city just
Speaker 1: to save money on the VET than have like being
Speaker 1: in New York City. And when I was like, oh,
Speaker 1: you know, can I just like wait one more day
Speaker 1: before you put the catheter the catheter in and take
Speaker 1: him to his regular vet. So I think he like,
Speaker 1: you know, he knew that I was concerned about the bills,
Speaker 1: so um, he was just like, don't worry about it,
Speaker 1: and he like entered me as a candidate into this
Speaker 1: pet rescue mission UM thing like totally unbeknownst to me
Speaker 1: because he knew what was going to happen and he
Speaker 1: didn't want that stress on it. It was like very
Speaker 1: very kind um. And then in return, I started to
Speaker 1: go fund me for Bruno and I paid the money
Speaker 1: back for someone else to have the same um experience
Speaker 1: that I had. So there are organizations out there that
Speaker 1: you can reach out to and they're very like sympathetic
Speaker 1: and kind and you know, just like weigh it all together.
Speaker 1: But also I think a very important thing is to
Speaker 1: take into consideration the costs of um euthanizing your dog,
Speaker 1: which is a very hard thing to look at it,
Speaker 1: and also what you're gonna do with the body and
Speaker 1: how much that costs? Oh right, I mean is it
Speaker 1: a lot? And it's one you have someone fuck your
Speaker 1: dog discounts that should be an option. That should be
Speaker 1: an option you should be able to check that off
Speaker 1: before you die for a discount the mortician. Honestly, wait
Speaker 1: a second, that sucks that. It's so so if is
Speaker 1: it free? If you're like just throw them in the dumpster?
Speaker 1: Is it free? Well? I I buried Bruno in someone's backyard,
Speaker 1: so that was free for me. So that was free. Yes, Okay,
Speaker 1: that's good. Did you was that hard to dig? Oh?
Speaker 1: My god? Well yes, taking into the ground is so hard.
Speaker 1: I mean Jeffrey Dahmer and he there's multiple stories of
Speaker 1: him trying to exuom bodies to fuck them, and he
Speaker 1: would always get tired because he's like, it's so much
Speaker 1: deeper than you think in the ground is so cold
Speaker 1: and wet and hard. And that's always what I remember,
Speaker 1: is like digging a grave is a lot harder than
Speaker 1: people think it is. Most people give up, and that's
Speaker 1: why bodies are found after like us light flooding is
Speaker 1: because people don't dig them deep enough. That's why it's
Speaker 1: like it has to be six feet you know, it's
Speaker 1: hard to get down that far. Did you ever hear
Speaker 1: that that Norm McDonald bit about what he would do.
Speaker 1: It's on his last album where it's like I would
Speaker 1: go into the woods and I would dig a very
Speaker 1: very very deep grave. Do you ever hear that bit? No? No,
Speaker 1: what is it? Well, that's the bit. I mean, I
Speaker 1: don't want to I can't do it justice. So but
Speaker 1: but Norm McDonald says it's funny. But yeah, I have
Speaker 1: to say that there was a friend of mine who
Speaker 1: had a problem with their animal and they were like,
Speaker 1: do do I What do I do? Like, Um, I
Speaker 1: have this animal that is like bites everyone and it's
Speaker 1: like causing my life so much turmoil. Do I like
Speaker 1: take take a risk and fly out to go get
Speaker 1: it and think it's not gonna bite my life and
Speaker 1: fuck it up? And I was like, you should just
Speaker 1: put it down. He keep suggesting people put down their
Speaker 1: animals this week, and I swear to God I I
Speaker 1: fucking love animals. But like, why am I the only
Speaker 1: one who ever thinks that it's a good idea to
Speaker 1: just like put things. But I'm also you know, slightly
Speaker 1: suicidal and have those ideations where I'm like, I think
Speaker 1: death is a sweet release. So I've always kind of like,
Speaker 1: I think that's the better option. So I don't want
Speaker 1: people to misconstrue me telling this girl to put her
Speaker 1: dog down. As like I'm being heartless and like careless.
Speaker 1: I'm actually just coming at it from a perspective of
Speaker 1: someone who, like I hope someone puts me down, like
Speaker 1: I hope there's the option for euthanization when I get
Speaker 1: to the point where I'm in so much pain instead
Speaker 1: of just waiting for it to because I because people
Speaker 1: are too scared to like see me die, they just
Speaker 1: have to watch me die from natural causes. So that
Speaker 1: was my point there. But it is hilarious to me
Speaker 1: that this week on the Girl's Chat, I gave advice
Speaker 1: for someone to put down their cat and no one
Speaker 1: co signed on it. Everyone was like, I think there's
Speaker 1: a different perspective here, and I was the first to
Speaker 1: be like, oh me, me, me, put your cat down.
Speaker 1: I was like, I'll go with you to do it.
Speaker 1: Not because I'm like excited for this cat to die,
Speaker 1: but I'm just like, oh, I just don't see another option.
Speaker 1: I just don't. But obviously there's many other options. So
Speaker 1: thank you for your SADU fan trax. It didn't turn
Speaker 1: out to be very funny because we were able to
Speaker 1: make some jokes, but I am really really sorry for
Speaker 1: what you're going through and it makes me just Yeah,
Speaker 1: animals suffering is just too much to comprehend, and you
Speaker 1: gotta make jokes. So thank you for the disturbing dark
Speaker 1: fan traxes today. Guys. Good job. Keep them coming. We
Speaker 1: will get to them at some point. I am on
Speaker 1: tour again this weekend. If you were in Spokane, Washington
Speaker 1: or Eugene, Oregon in those areas, I will be there
Speaker 1: this weekend, and then the weekend after that I think
Speaker 1: I'm oh, I'm in Palm Springs on a girls trip,
Speaker 1: and then the weekend after that I'm going to be
Speaker 1: in Las Vegas. Are there any other dates that I
Speaker 1: can plug Anya that you know of. It's not till
Speaker 1: April fourteenth in Bethlehem, PA. And then April fifteenth in Hampton,
Speaker 1: New Hampshire. Yeah, tuson Arizona AA April twenty seventh. I'm
Speaker 1: going to see Taylor Swift on April second. That's a
Speaker 1: big deal. I also watch the Kennedy Center Awards this
Speaker 1: Sunday for the Mark Twain Prize for um Adam Sandler.
Speaker 1: That will be on CNN on Sunday night. UM watch
Speaker 1: the iHeart Music Radio Awards on Monday night. I will
Speaker 1: be a special presenter on those awards. So I think
Speaker 1: that's on Fox. You can watch that. And um, Brian,
Speaker 1: do you have a podcast right now that we can promote. No,
Speaker 1: I don't have a podcast. Okay, we'll just follow Brian
Speaker 1: Frangie on Instagram Brian Frangie. UM, support on your Marina
Speaker 1: as always, come see me on tour and uh yeah yeah,
Speaker 1: don't be cool and just put your dog down. Easy answer.