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Speaker 1: Welcome back to another episode about Give It is COVID

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Speaker 1: nineteen edition. I'm your host, James Heeney, Yes that James Eni.

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Speaker 1: What's that? Okay? Down in my head, I'm gonna select

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Speaker 1: a nice breathe preferably, but I digress. Let's meet the

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Speaker 1: shower in no particular order. Say hello to James Teny,

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Speaker 1: Jinki Hinky, and Jim esquires. Would you go skydiving with me? Oh?

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Speaker 1: My god, yes I would. I would go skydiving with you.

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Speaker 1: I've bungee jumped in I felt like I got ripped

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Speaker 1: off because it only lasts so long. I need to

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Speaker 1: be really out there for a while to let go

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Speaker 1: of the world. Uh, and I'd love to tandem skydive

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Speaker 1: with you. Kevin, okay, sweet, how's how's Thursday tomorrow? Yes,

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Speaker 1: I'm free? All right, it's weird that you're free, but okay,

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Speaker 1: back by a very loud fan, Deman, it's Vanessa Raglan Venetian.

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Speaker 1: I can't. I can't let the fans down, right. If

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Speaker 1: you had anything to say to the fans, what would

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Speaker 1: it be. You've got to love yourselves. That's for perfect

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Speaker 1: lay off a niche will you? Yeah, let yourselves demand yourselves.

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Speaker 1: Start with you leave a little something for yourself. Look out,

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Speaker 1: it's Craigkowski kacount. Has there ever been a dangerous activity

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Speaker 1: that you signed up for? No? No, never, never improv

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Speaker 1: as is as dangerous as I get. And that's how

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Speaker 1: I get my heart rate going and my my thrills.

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Speaker 1: I would never jump out of a plane. I would

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Speaker 1: never do cocaine. I would never hop on a train.

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Speaker 1: I would never hop on a plane. All right, thank

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Speaker 1: you for sharing a question. Man, I'm just the safest

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Speaker 1: form of trouble. All right, quantas air ladies, there's Chris

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Speaker 1: a Varado high on life. See how happy are you

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Speaker 1: to have the original five plus Joey back together? This

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Speaker 1: is all I want. I mean, this is this has

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Speaker 1: been than doing cocaine on a plane. Well close, yeah,

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Speaker 1: and last but all coucci and no coup for you.

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Speaker 1: If you think of LEAs it's Joey Greer father Tim.

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Speaker 1: Did you win a possible accomplice ever sneak into a

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Speaker 1: church and drink the sacramental wine? No? No, I was

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Speaker 1: one time in the back in the green room as

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Speaker 1: they call it, and uh they they there was. I

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Speaker 1: saw how the sausages made and there's all these um,

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Speaker 1: these pieces of you Charus, right like the body of Quest,

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Speaker 1: but they weren't blessed yet, so they were not the

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Speaker 1: actual body of Christ. They were just these crackers. And

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Speaker 1: they were in this clear plastic bag like if you

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Speaker 1: took like cereal out of the box. It's just like that,

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Speaker 1: like that's what it looks like we'd like to And

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Speaker 1: there was a pack of like five hundred and I

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Speaker 1: was like, oh, wow, that's that's what they are. They're

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Speaker 1: just like they just set them in bulk uh and uh.

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Speaker 1: And that surprised your little head. Yeah. I just thought

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Speaker 1: it was going to be more romantic than that, right,

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Speaker 1: I thought, please do. I worked at a church for

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Speaker 1: two years. I kind of I know what Joey's saying,

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Speaker 1: and that kept happening over and over to me. When

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Speaker 1: you see a pack of five body of Christ, it

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Speaker 1: doesn't stop with the costal size body of Christ. And

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Speaker 1: there's there's yeah, yeah, I know, I can only imagine,

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Speaker 1: but I was just like, what the fun. I just

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Speaker 1: thought the candles, the wine, the community, it's all just

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Speaker 1: big boxes of cheap stuff that c I mean, they

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Speaker 1: got that one cup that no one can drink from

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Speaker 1: except but yeah, I was like, at least put them

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Speaker 1: in a nice bowl, you know what I mean? I

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Speaker 1: sell fane ramp on. Come on, people, stop making church

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Speaker 1: feel like a business to me. All right, let's do

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Speaker 1: a damn show. Almost all of the scene suggestions gathered

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Speaker 1: from your listener emails and thank you for them, or

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Speaker 1: from our patron v I p s to become a

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Speaker 1: patron support of the show. Patrons part of the show

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Speaker 1: and enjoy exclusive content. Other person, just head on over

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Speaker 1: to patreon dot com slash alchemy this. If you'd like

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Speaker 1: to submit a scene suggestion email, please write to the

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Speaker 1: podcast at your name here alcoy this dot com. That's

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Speaker 1: your name. I'm here, Vanessa. Can you hear us? I

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Speaker 1: think it's me my squeaky voice. No, is it more

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Speaker 1: than that? Seen one comes to us in fact from

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Speaker 1: Patreon Alcamaniac Matt, who wrote, Hello Alchemists. I don't want

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Speaker 1: to be a broken record, but you're all amazing. My

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Speaker 1: scene suggestion is as follows a bank loan off of

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Speaker 1: sir gets creative on his or her last day of employment.

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Speaker 1: Thanks Matt. Hi, Yeah, and you wanted to talk to

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Speaker 1: somebody about a possible loan line? Do I yep? Sorry, sorry, sir,

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Speaker 1: I was in line. Yeah, no, everyone's in line. I

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Speaker 1: think I can take both of you at the same time. Okay,

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Speaker 1: I'm not comfortable with that. Well, you're in you're not

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Speaker 1: comfortable with Yeah, the password of social distancing. I know

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Speaker 1: it's two words, but they still pass. Well, then I'm sorry.

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Speaker 1: And we have the little old guys dressed like a

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Speaker 1: cowboy stands six ft away from me, but he has

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Speaker 1: waited patiently. Yeah, like the rest of us. Is there

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Speaker 1: not an order? Is? It's the front of the line,

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Speaker 1: first back and thank you. I'm in the middle. Okay,

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Speaker 1: hold on, don't go over I didn't get a number.

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Speaker 1: Is my line doesn't have numbers. I've run things a

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Speaker 1: little different over here. He's from her six. Don't go

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Speaker 1: over there. I'm number six, number six, So don't you

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Speaker 1: go off there. You couldn't regret it. You could get

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Speaker 1: a good deal over here. Great, sir, I need to

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Speaker 1: talk to somebody about alone. Need a need alon come

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Speaker 1: on in and take a seed. Thank you so much,

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Speaker 1: thank you. I was down like Fani sitting down here, sir,

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Speaker 1: you're on my lap. I'd be great if you could

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Speaker 1: sitting down here, right, but as you can see, I

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Speaker 1: actually sat down. Okay, can you help me maybe with

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Speaker 1: this old guy? Can we get him to another office?

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Speaker 1: Do you like this pen? I do? Yeah? Yeah, I

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Speaker 1: got it in Japan? Popone? What guy do for you today? Sir?

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Speaker 1: I'm here to make your wildest dreams come true, with

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Speaker 1: or without this little cowboy. I don't know what's up

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Speaker 1: with the old cowboy dude here, but I do need alone,

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Speaker 1: please my debt. I do money to pay my debt. Now, sir,

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Speaker 1: are you concerned with your with your financial situation or

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Speaker 1: with his? I'm more concerned with mine. Then let's go.

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Speaker 1: Let's do this all right? Do you need how much?

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Speaker 1: What are we talking here? I need a loan for

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Speaker 1: twenty seven thousand dollars fo? Okay? And what's this for? Man?

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Speaker 1: I'd rather not say. M hmm. That's personally. Do you

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Speaker 1: have one reference I can call somebody who could vouch

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Speaker 1: for your good for your character? Yeah? Sure, you can

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Speaker 1: call my brother Tim, all right, give me that number please? Okay?

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Speaker 1: Seven to four seven oh two to two four four,

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Speaker 1: that's my number. That's my phone number. Really weird, little

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Speaker 1: old cowboy dude. If that was your number. Because he's

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Speaker 1: calling and I don't see your phone lighting up. It's yeah,

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Speaker 1: my brother Tim's coming on promiership. This is Tim. Hey Tim,

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Speaker 1: how's it going? This is sorry about in right now.

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Speaker 1: But if you leave a message after the beat, I'll

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Speaker 1: get right back to you. And I have to add,

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Speaker 1: if this is anything happy to do with my brother,

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Speaker 1: do not call me ever again. I have cut off

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Speaker 1: all ties to my brother. He is a criminal, He

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Speaker 1: is a liar, he is a cheat. So I have

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Speaker 1: to ask you out if you're about to leave a

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Speaker 1: message about my brother that you do not do. So

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Speaker 1: this is Tim, Tim. Can we please change the goddamn voice. No,

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Speaker 1: the kids want to be a part of it, Okay,

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Speaker 1: they just want to say, hey, this is the Reynolds.

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Speaker 1: Leave a message like all the other kids. I know

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Speaker 1: that nobody has left a message about my brother in

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Speaker 1: the ten years that we've had that voicemail going. But

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Speaker 1: what is it? My soccer coach is scared of me

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Speaker 1: because of the voice. Now, why is your soccer coach

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Speaker 1: calling to leave leave messages? What do you think, honey?

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Speaker 1: Because of scheduling, Because it's scheduling, because the scrimmages they

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Speaker 1: were calling about scrimmages. And they said they said that

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Speaker 1: they died. They were Margot missed the scrimmage. Margot mss

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Speaker 1: the scrimmage. Why are they not using email to send

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Speaker 1: out the schedule? Oh my, just change the boys smail.

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Speaker 1: That's what this is. In the in the pinch, sometimes

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Speaker 1: your phone call is more effective if you want to

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Speaker 1: just grab someone than an email, because sometimes people don't

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Speaker 1: check the email. Myself, that coach says, granted, granted. Look

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Speaker 1: as soon as I change that message, somebody's gonna call

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Speaker 1: about my goddamn brother. Hey, James can catch a pretty

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Speaker 1: quick sec. I catch me. I'm the gingerbread man. Sorry

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Speaker 1: to interrupt. I just read that book last night, Stephanie.

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Speaker 1: You are you are a character. You've always been a character. Always.

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Speaker 1: Don't have read that book? Oh god, that gingerbread man.

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Speaker 1: Uh listen at the mark. I'm not going to jolly

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Speaker 1: got here at the market on the front. And if

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Speaker 1: you're a gingerbread man, come to my office. I'm gonna

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Speaker 1: eat you. I don't have red hair. Hey, James, can

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Speaker 1: I just get one word with you? Bud? Yeah, come

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Speaker 1: on in my office. Come on, okay, all right, Look,

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Speaker 1: have a seat, I don't know if I should. I'm

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Speaker 1: trying to wrap up my my office. You find me

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Speaker 1: coming back so I can pay my debt, James, don't

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Speaker 1: pay attention to this fucking guy. Okay's at my desk,

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Speaker 1: all tape? How is he here? Also? Now? And my

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Speaker 1: mistaken is today your last day? It is? I've decided

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Speaker 1: that I'm gonna go improuv full time. So all right,

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Speaker 1: all right, why don't you go out with the bang?

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Speaker 1: My man? What do you mean? Well? I mean since

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Speaker 1: the day you walked intore, you've been a sad sack,

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Speaker 1: always playing second fiddle to me. I give all the

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Speaker 1: biggest loans. Everyone knows that about me. Well, I just

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Speaker 1: like to use cautions. Sure something. I mean, it's just

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Speaker 1: gonna get frizzy if I just yeah, frizzy up a

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Speaker 1: little bit, all right, Yeah, I have a little fun. Okay, Okay,

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Speaker 1: I feel crazy. I feel crazy. Okay, Yeah, you're like nuts, No,

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Speaker 1: you look nuts. Go out there, Go out there and

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Speaker 1: have a little fun. Mm hmm. Hey, hey, I just

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Speaker 1: don't want to burn any bridges. What if what if

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Speaker 1: things don't work out with the improv thing and then

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Speaker 1: he because you're meant to be burned my man. Okay,

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Speaker 1: all right, hey, take this pen with you. But this

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Speaker 1: is from Japan. It's yours now, Okay. I don't even

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Speaker 1: know how to write in Japanese. It's just great. This

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Speaker 1: is great right now. What happened to your hair? You

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Speaker 1: look like a nut. You look like a crazy nut.

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Speaker 1: Oh well, you know what. I'm sorry. Let me put

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Speaker 1: this hat up now, you look like a cloud wearing

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Speaker 1: a hat. Oh God, don't look at me. I I'm

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Speaker 1: just let's just do this bank thing. I'm gonna go

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Speaker 1: out with a bang. What are you looking to get today? What?

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Speaker 1: It's me, Stephanie, your coworker. I'm not looking for anything,

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Speaker 1: you psycho. I'm so sorry, Stephanie. I'm sorry. I'm up here.

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Speaker 1: Don't know. I wasn't your hold on. I'm sorry. I

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Speaker 1: wasn't looking. I didn't do it. I was not hello. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I don't know. You're a ginger bread man. I'm not

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Speaker 1: a gingerbread man. I want to eat you. Listen, you've

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Speaker 1: got to stop this. This is inappropriate. I feel uncomfortable

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Speaker 1: at work and like I'm in danger. Me one of

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Speaker 1: different gingerbread. No, you you cannot touch my hands. Hey,

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Speaker 1: Mr Potter your neon is here. Okay, gingerbread man, I'm

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Speaker 1: going to my bed. I'm not. I've I've got to

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Speaker 1: finish up this last ship to the out of the bank.

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Speaker 1: Out of my bed gets soggy and soft. What I like,

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Speaker 1: my gingerbread st I don't know who gave you the

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Speaker 1: idea that I was a gingerbread man. But I'm a

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Speaker 1: human being, and you know what. I was going to

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Speaker 1: wait for the end of today to tell you this.

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Speaker 1: But I'm fucking done in the banking business. Okay, yeah,

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Speaker 1: I can't. I can't quit. Mr Party your noons here,

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Speaker 1: Oh my goodness, is going to quit on my watch.

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Speaker 1: I'm right here. No, I'm quitting. I gave two weeks notice,

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Speaker 1: but you refused it back then, and and well the

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Speaker 1: time is nigh. So I'm I'm a noon. I'm a noon,

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Speaker 1: A point many. I was sorry. Can you let go

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Speaker 1: of my hand? Please? Don't stay close? Go choking some milk?

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Speaker 1: I'm sorry. What was wrong about man's hair band? I'm

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Speaker 1: gonna eat him? Oh I want to, I want I

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Speaker 1: want to refine it my house. Okay, I don't know

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Speaker 1: what happens next. There are they tell me to make

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Speaker 1: an appointments down here. I am. I want to refinance

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Speaker 1: my house to get a better mortgage rate so I

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Speaker 1: can save money. Suze ormand Susie Orman. I got her

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Speaker 1: book and I have I've read the chapters, titles, and

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Speaker 1: I want to refinance my house. Okay, well, look, the

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Speaker 1: fedge interest rate sucks right now, so don't put your

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Speaker 1: money in the bank. Okay, it's gonna do nothing. You're

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Speaker 1: my You're my bank, I know. Pack it up, pack

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Speaker 1: it up? Okay, what up to me? Don't kick me?

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Speaker 1: Ring ring? All right, this is Tim returning your call.

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Speaker 1: This is a pre recorded message that I've never in advance.

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Speaker 1: And if this is Coach Wilkins, by the way, stop

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Speaker 1: calling my daughter. Text If you need to print out

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Speaker 1: the scrimmage schedule handed out out of practice to all

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Speaker 1: the kids, that's fine, but you're leaving of the messages

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Speaker 1: on our voicemail. Get in touch TI, okay, coach, al right,

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Speaker 1: sit down, I'm gonna make your wildest dreams come true today.

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Speaker 1: Thank god. I just want to pay off my debt.

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Speaker 1: It's all I want to do. What you want to

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Speaker 1: pay it off or you want to get alone. I'm

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Speaker 1: a loan officer. I that was told to come. I

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Speaker 1: have the money to pay you off my debt. I

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Speaker 1: want to make your dreams come true. I don't need

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Speaker 1: you to pay back the bank. I want to go

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Speaker 1: out with a bank. Yeah, hi, Tim, Tim, your daughter's coach.

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Speaker 1: It's your daughter's coach. And uh, I guess you had

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Speaker 1: a problem with my phoning instead of emailing. I'm not

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Speaker 1: in right now, but if you leave a message after

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Speaker 1: the beep, I'll get back to you. By the way,

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Speaker 1: if this is edible arrangements, I ordered a fruit platter.

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Speaker 1: I'm it's my understanding that that's what you do. You

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Speaker 1: left a bunch of melted chocolate on my doorstep. I

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Speaker 1: have a family full of diabetics and we can't eat candy.

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Speaker 1: We can eat fruit. Sucross is okay, But what is

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Speaker 1: this new voicemail? Tim? It's just about fashion edible or rangement.

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Speaker 1: They fucked us. They fucked us hard. Hey Dad, what

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Speaker 1: is it, sweetie? I got cut from the team? You

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Speaker 1: got cut from the team. Was it that, coach Wilkins?

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Speaker 1: It was because of the horrible thank you said about

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Speaker 1: edible arrangements? Oh my god, oh my god, are you serious?

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Speaker 1: Coach Wilkins's wife works in edible arrangements. It's gotten them

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Speaker 1: through some hard time. How am I supposed to know that, honey?

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Speaker 1: Because you're not hate on a voicemail, Tim, You hate

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Speaker 1: on a voicemail death, Thank you, Margot. Okay, look, I've

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Speaker 1: got a pre record some calls. So hey, James, um, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: what's up. I've been trying to go out with the bank,

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Speaker 1: but everything's going terrible. Everybody that comes to my desk

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Speaker 1: wants to give us money. I go into the boss's

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Speaker 1: office and he grabs my hands, putting my pinky finger

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Speaker 1: in his mouth, and he wants me to soaking milk. Alright, alright, alright, right, alright, alright, alright, okay,

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Speaker 1: hold on, hold on here, just have a glass of milk.

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Speaker 1: Just alright, thank you. Excuse me, boys, I'm looking for

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Speaker 1: a loan for my gunpowder factory. Damn, that woman's hot

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Speaker 1: as hell. I'm up were Rick? Can I can I

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Speaker 1: take take this from you? Yeah? We just finish that milk. First,

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Speaker 1: finish this milk. I'm not thirsty though, just finish to finish. Okay,

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Speaker 1: all right, all right, go get him Tagger. Hold on,

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Speaker 1: there's a lot of milk. In that glass. I don't

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Speaker 1: I can't finish the rest of this, right, don't go,

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Speaker 1: you know you need to finish the milk. Okay, I

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Speaker 1: can't stand. Does he a glass of milk go wasted?

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Speaker 1: M A few more SIPs of the way there. I

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Speaker 1: think that's all I can drink, and like some tolerance,

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Speaker 1: have cheese cheese often, but I'm not supposed to drink

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Speaker 1: this much milk. Milk, drink, drink, drink up. Okay, it's gone.

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Speaker 1: That's a good boy. Are you the person that works here?

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Speaker 1: You look like a crazy person. It's just my hair.

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Speaker 1: It got frizzy from the humidity. But I'm a great

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Speaker 1: loan officer and it's my last day, so you're in luck. Okay,

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Speaker 1: come over to my desk. This is Rick's desk. Rick

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Speaker 1: has a nice desk. Yeah, it's that's all his family.

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Speaker 1: He's got a beautiful family. Got a laborator dog. I

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Speaker 1: love a lab but it doesn't leave a lot of

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Speaker 1: time for him to have passions. I I do improv.

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Speaker 1: You Come over my desk. I've got some I've got

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Speaker 1: some pictures that I have a funny little mouth. Pencil

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Speaker 1: shop or now it's not a pencil shopping. Now, I'm

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Speaker 1: a man. I just to him. You spend your all

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Speaker 1: day long, little cowboy. I need a loan. Oh damn it.

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Speaker 1: That's Rix phone. I can answer that. Oh, I can

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Speaker 1: get it. Hello. Hi, this is Tim from James Improv team.

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Speaker 1: Oh hello, it's for you. It's from your improv team. Honey.

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Speaker 1: Oh really, Oh good? I recorded this message. We're all

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Speaker 1: at rehearsal right now, wondering where you are. We're in

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Speaker 1: the middle of zip zaps up and there's no zapp

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Speaker 1: because you're not here. Yes, it's a three person team.

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Speaker 1: I don't think that they're doing zip zap zop right

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Speaker 1: because I am. You don't design your zapps and the zaps.

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Speaker 1: It's all in the moment. We do strictly scripted improv

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Speaker 1: any way. Not sure if you're really committed to the

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Speaker 1: team or not, or if you're still working as a

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Speaker 1: bank loan officer for I'm coming. I'm comming. It's a recording.

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Speaker 1: You can't hear me. Why was he calling Rick's desk?

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Speaker 1: I think let's see one. Please make it stump. Oh

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Speaker 1: my god, it's so good. Oh oh it hurts, mommy,

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Speaker 1: make it stump. See two complets from Martin, who wrote

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Speaker 1: Dear Alchemists, thank you so much for keeping the comedy

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Speaker 1: flowing during these crazy days. I truly miss Vanessa. Where

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Speaker 1: did you go? She's right here, that's right, Martin scene

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Speaker 1: suggestion a scam artist Convention. Thanks Cimelian for using my

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Speaker 1: previous suggestion. Martin from Canada, Hey give me yeah you yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 1: you gotta say yeah, how would you? How would you

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Speaker 1: like to make three times your money that you're making

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Speaker 1: at the banks at the banks. Yeah, And I say

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Speaker 1: three times, I meant eleven times. I don't work at

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Speaker 1: the banks. Do you have money in banks? I have

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Speaker 1: a little bit of money. I want to have a

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Speaker 1: question for you. Are you ever stressed out? Yeah? All

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Speaker 1: the time. I can't sleep, That's right, that's me. Do

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Speaker 1: you get a cold moving around cold season? I get

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Speaker 1: a couple of them. Yeah. Okay. Have you heard of

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Speaker 1: essential oils? No? Oh god, I'm so glad you pulled

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Speaker 1: me over because this this was meant to be. Obviously,

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Speaker 1: essential oils are these amazing things are going to change

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Speaker 1: your life. I can get you a starter kid, and

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00:22:41,520 --> 00:22:44,080
Speaker 1: there's no obligation, and if they don't change your life,

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Speaker 1: it's not but it will change your life. You have

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00:22:48,920 --> 00:22:52,040
Speaker 1: some redness in your skin too, huh yeah yeah whatever

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00:22:52,080 --> 00:22:55,639
Speaker 1: that stage. Yeah, you've gotta Yeah, you've got inflammatory issues.

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Speaker 1: While the thieves oil is going to help that. So

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00:22:57,640 --> 00:23:01,240
Speaker 1: you're gonna need this one. Yeah yeah. Sun hurting your eyes?

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Speaker 1: Oh god, this is you guys. You guys aren't wearing

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00:23:04,560 --> 00:23:07,800
Speaker 1: the proper eyeglass like the UV rays that just go

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00:23:07,920 --> 00:23:10,280
Speaker 1: in there. They burned the rettons here, try the song,

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00:23:10,800 --> 00:23:15,080
Speaker 1: you try the Okay, you look really cool in those. Hey,

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Speaker 1: you want to make times your money there, buddy, for

350
00:23:19,800 --> 00:23:26,040
Speaker 1: each of you can have those classes each You know what,

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00:23:26,080 --> 00:23:28,280
Speaker 1: maybe if we do the thing where we're making eleven

352
00:23:28,280 --> 00:23:30,720
Speaker 1: times as much as we're making, then these glasses won't

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Speaker 1: seem like such a thing and we'll be working to

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Speaker 1: our fullest potential. Okay, I don't know if I should

355
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Speaker 1: celebrate or cry. It looks like we have ten thousand

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Speaker 1: people at the convention but no tickets sold. So I

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Speaker 1: don't know how the hell that happened. Okay, I don't

358
00:23:44,520 --> 00:23:48,600
Speaker 1: know how anyone got in, but here we are zero

359
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Speaker 1: tickets sold. I think that I think I think that

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Speaker 1: there's a glitch with the event, right, I think it

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Speaker 1: must be or somebody created a glitch perhaps with the

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Speaker 1: event right? Is that what it is? Well, someone gets

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Speaker 1: circuit City on the fucking ohne because I gotta figure

364
00:24:01,160 --> 00:24:07,199
Speaker 1: this ship out right now? Okay? Is that someone? Hello?

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Speaker 1: It's it's circuit City for you on the phone, yelling hello,

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Speaker 1: holding it in front of your fucking faceboy, Okay, I

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Speaker 1: don't know foot phones. Okay, I know I phone. I

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00:24:21,160 --> 00:24:29,120
Speaker 1: didn't know without Hello, Hi is a circus c U. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: there's a glitch in our event, right, you gotta do something.

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Speaker 1: I don't run event right, I just run cables. We've

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Speaker 1: got we do the tech, the software side, and the

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Speaker 1: service side. Is well, I suppose that's probably event right? Oh?

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Speaker 1: I what was your name? Dick Chatter? Is that? Is

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Speaker 1: that right? I'm gonna hang out. I'm sorry, sir. Well,

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Speaker 1: you can't talk to people like that, Okay. I Staple

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Speaker 1: Center conventions. Okay, I'm the guy. Excuse me. There's a

377
00:25:02,560 --> 00:25:08,600
Speaker 1: problem with your event break? Yes there is. I'm Richard

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Speaker 1: Chatter from from the vent right. Uh? I can I

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Speaker 1: can do a test to your system? Great? Yeah? Please? Okay,

380
00:25:17,760 --> 00:25:20,800
Speaker 1: I just need a measure credit card. You need to

381
00:25:20,800 --> 00:25:26,480
Speaker 1: measure my credit card. Did you need a major credit card? Major?

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00:25:26,680 --> 00:25:29,800
Speaker 1: A major credit card? He needs a major credit card? Okay,

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00:25:29,800 --> 00:25:32,840
Speaker 1: well look all I have is American Express Discovery. I

384
00:25:32,880 --> 00:25:34,440
Speaker 1: got a couple of debit cards. What do you what?

385
00:25:34,440 --> 00:25:41,080
Speaker 1: What do you take? MasterCard? It's discovered, Discovery discovered? Do

386
00:25:41,160 --> 00:25:47,320
Speaker 1: you take Discovery? Ladies and gentlemen and everything in between.

387
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Speaker 1: Welcome to the Scam Artist Convention. As you know, we're

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Speaker 1: gonna have some great panels this afternoon, a good opportunities

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Speaker 1: for cheers with your favorite scam artist. And of course

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00:26:03,200 --> 00:26:09,879
Speaker 1: the buffet is open all day. Now do me a

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Speaker 1: quick favor. Ladies and gentlemen, go ahead and look out

392
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Speaker 1: of those windows here of the Staple Center. You'll notice

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00:26:15,359 --> 00:26:18,840
Speaker 1: we're floating. That's right, we actually got you into a

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Speaker 1: cruise ship, your fox. Uh, this is a cruise ship.

395
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Speaker 1: We scammed you all. Um. This is gonna be a

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Speaker 1: good time because it takes us into international waters where

397
00:26:29,480 --> 00:26:36,480
Speaker 1: anything goes. Okay, now we have uh Steve, he's in

398
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Speaker 1: a tap dance for us, and uh, enjoy your afternoon, everybody.

399
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Speaker 1: That's what they have for us, a tap dancer. And

400
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Speaker 1: I can't find my wallet, where's my shirt? Where the hell?

401
00:26:50,880 --> 00:26:54,399
Speaker 1: Did my shirt go? You're not You're not wearing a shirt.

402
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Speaker 1: I know I was wearing a shirt when I came in.

403
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Speaker 1: Where the where? Where? Where is my wallet? And what

404
00:26:59,119 --> 00:27:02,320
Speaker 1: you're Oh, god, dear good tooth is missing? What? Oh

405
00:27:02,359 --> 00:27:11,040
Speaker 1: my god? Hey you too, you're missing a few things? Yes,

406
00:27:11,200 --> 00:27:14,159
Speaker 1: give it back? And then I know it took him.

407
00:27:15,200 --> 00:27:19,000
Speaker 1: Give it back. It's this guy Tim, he's roaming around

408
00:27:19,480 --> 00:27:22,400
Speaker 1: the convention floor. What do you have to do with it?

409
00:27:22,920 --> 00:27:24,960
Speaker 1: I've just seen him working, and I want to get

410
00:27:25,000 --> 00:27:28,760
Speaker 1: him off the ship. Okay, we'll help you, we'll kill him.

411
00:27:28,840 --> 00:27:32,320
Speaker 1: Let's do this. Where is it? He's over there by

412
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Speaker 1: the buffet. Okay, there's a lot of people by the buffet.

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Speaker 1: So I mean I can carve I mean I can

414
00:27:42,520 --> 00:27:44,680
Speaker 1: and any kind of any fond piece. I can carve

415
00:27:44,720 --> 00:27:47,000
Speaker 1: it out. But you just gotta tell me what you like.

416
00:27:47,080 --> 00:27:49,320
Speaker 1: I mean, this is a this is an endless buffet here.

417
00:27:49,600 --> 00:27:53,120
Speaker 1: So are you talking to me, sir? Oh? Yeah, I'm

418
00:27:53,119 --> 00:27:56,359
Speaker 1: sorry that I thought you could hear me. Um, I

419
00:27:56,400 --> 00:28:00,439
Speaker 1: could carve any piece of the fund. Excuse me? Yeah, Tim?

420
00:28:00,480 --> 00:28:05,080
Speaker 1: Are you Tim? My name is Tim. Yeah, I don't

421
00:28:05,080 --> 00:28:08,480
Speaker 1: know his name. I'm not asking him his name, but

422
00:28:08,600 --> 00:28:13,120
Speaker 1: maybe what is your name? What's your name? The other guy?

423
00:28:13,560 --> 00:28:15,520
Speaker 1: He can't hear. I don't know why. Why can't you hear?

424
00:28:15,640 --> 00:28:20,480
Speaker 1: He was? You'm looking right at you. You're I mean,

425
00:28:20,520 --> 00:28:23,400
Speaker 1: his name Texas Tim, but I don't my name Texas Tim.

426
00:28:23,440 --> 00:28:27,240
Speaker 1: But my name is Blake. Okay, so you're out, obviously.

427
00:28:27,640 --> 00:28:29,919
Speaker 1: So it's got to be the fondue to give us

428
00:28:29,960 --> 00:28:32,560
Speaker 1: back our teeth and our money. Well, I don't have

429
00:28:32,600 --> 00:28:34,440
Speaker 1: any of that. I just worked in the buffet for

430
00:28:34,480 --> 00:28:36,960
Speaker 1: the cruise. Well, then take all your clothes off, empty

431
00:28:36,960 --> 00:28:39,920
Speaker 1: your cavities, prove it. Huh, Well, do you mean I'm working?

432
00:28:40,080 --> 00:28:42,600
Speaker 1: I can't take my clothes with that don sanitary, it's

433
00:28:42,640 --> 00:28:46,040
Speaker 1: an international waters. Take your clothes mean to hold things up?

434
00:28:46,160 --> 00:28:49,280
Speaker 1: Could you give me a slice of that fond a

435
00:28:49,360 --> 00:28:52,120
Speaker 1: slice of the fun, dude, just give me one slice

436
00:28:52,120 --> 00:28:54,080
Speaker 1: of the fun due on my plates. Excuse me, sir,

437
00:28:54,120 --> 00:28:56,760
Speaker 1: I'm talking to them. Thank you? Yeah, I mean I

438
00:28:56,800 --> 00:29:01,720
Speaker 1: can cut any slice of any my wallet. I'm missing

439
00:29:01,720 --> 00:29:05,800
Speaker 1: my wallet. No one cares. A lady the guys says

440
00:29:05,800 --> 00:29:08,080
Speaker 1: his real name is Blake is lying? It's Tim. Ask him,

441
00:29:08,160 --> 00:29:19,120
Speaker 1: why don't you confront him? Well, oh my god, Blake. Ah, yeah,

442
00:29:19,160 --> 00:29:24,800
Speaker 1: how are you? I'm doing all right? What brings you here? Well?

443
00:29:24,880 --> 00:29:28,880
Speaker 1: I thought it would attend this convention at the Staples Center,

444
00:29:28,920 --> 00:29:30,400
Speaker 1: but now I'm on a fucking cruise ship and I

445
00:29:30,440 --> 00:29:33,920
Speaker 1: got the neural virus. You have the neural virus? Yes,

446
00:29:34,000 --> 00:29:36,880
Speaker 1: I do. We all do. We're on a cruise. Not yet,

447
00:29:36,920 --> 00:29:38,560
Speaker 1: we don't have it. We don't all have it yet.

448
00:29:38,600 --> 00:29:40,600
Speaker 1: It takes a minute. Do you have my wallet and

449
00:29:40,680 --> 00:29:44,560
Speaker 1: my my husband's tooth. I don't have the first idea

450
00:29:44,600 --> 00:29:46,680
Speaker 1: of what you're talking about. Lady. You know what, you

451
00:29:46,680 --> 00:29:48,560
Speaker 1: didn't look shocked enough when I said the tooth thing.

452
00:29:48,600 --> 00:29:54,480
Speaker 1: You definitely have him. I'm just ordering he's looking down

453
00:29:54,520 --> 00:29:58,280
Speaker 1: to the left every time you say that. Tim, thank

454
00:29:58,320 --> 00:29:59,800
Speaker 1: you so much that I mean, this trip is fan

455
00:30:00,000 --> 00:30:02,400
Speaker 1: That's like, I can't believe we're on a cruise going

456
00:30:02,440 --> 00:30:05,280
Speaker 1: on to see Margot gets to play with some friends

457
00:30:05,280 --> 00:30:07,200
Speaker 1: she's gonna make here. I don't see a lot of kids,

458
00:30:07,200 --> 00:30:09,440
Speaker 1: but I mean, I'm sure there's there's some kids on

459
00:30:09,440 --> 00:30:12,760
Speaker 1: the ship regardless. But baby, thank you so much for

460
00:30:12,840 --> 00:30:14,840
Speaker 1: doing this for us. I know we had a little

461
00:30:14,880 --> 00:30:19,800
Speaker 1: hiccup earlier. Yeah, yeah, we have Yeah, Um, can I

462
00:30:19,840 --> 00:30:24,840
Speaker 1: get you something to drink? Sure, Um, I'll take a

463
00:30:26,000 --> 00:30:31,520
Speaker 1: I'll take a tequila vodka. Okay, she liked that tall

464
00:30:32,200 --> 00:30:36,720
Speaker 1: Mom don't, oh, Margot, it's fine, it's fine. I'll take it.

465
00:30:37,800 --> 00:30:45,080
Speaker 1: Let Mommy get it tequila vodka. But when it's it's

466
00:30:45,120 --> 00:30:48,200
Speaker 1: like Uncle Tim is around, you know, Margot. No, we're

467
00:30:48,200 --> 00:30:52,880
Speaker 1: on vacation. Okay, I'm not stressed. And what about you, sir?

468
00:30:52,920 --> 00:30:54,680
Speaker 1: Can I get you anything to drink? I'll take a

469
00:30:54,720 --> 00:30:59,400
Speaker 1: gin whiskey whiskey and for the for the junior miss

470
00:31:00,080 --> 00:31:07,800
Speaker 1: just all right, extra ice please? You got at back

471
00:31:07,840 --> 00:31:13,160
Speaker 1: in a flash with the stash. Oh this is nice,

472
00:31:15,720 --> 00:31:19,160
Speaker 1: This is really nice. Yeah, I got got some fun

473
00:31:19,200 --> 00:31:23,880
Speaker 1: do slices for for all of us. Yeah. It takes

474
00:31:23,880 --> 00:31:26,560
Speaker 1: a while for the fun dude to harden enough to

475
00:31:26,640 --> 00:31:31,400
Speaker 1: get a slice out of it. Everyone keeps looking at

476
00:31:31,400 --> 00:31:36,800
Speaker 1: me like they want to consume me. Ladies and gentlemen,

477
00:31:36,880 --> 00:31:40,720
Speaker 1: thank you for meeting here at the Fellowship Haul. I

478
00:31:40,720 --> 00:31:48,040
Speaker 1: hope you all had a good lunch. It's right. It's

479
00:31:48,040 --> 00:31:50,960
Speaker 1: been brought to my attention that some of you are

480
00:31:51,520 --> 00:31:54,680
Speaker 1: um not having the time you could be having because

481
00:31:54,680 --> 00:31:58,200
Speaker 1: you're weary of everybody. And that makes sense. I mean

482
00:31:58,240 --> 00:32:02,640
Speaker 1: this is a scar in artist convention. Now we have

483
00:32:02,760 --> 00:32:07,440
Speaker 1: set up boots throughout the ship. They are called truth boots.

484
00:32:08,280 --> 00:32:13,320
Speaker 1: Say it with me. You can anytime you feel like

485
00:32:13,360 --> 00:32:15,920
Speaker 1: you're underwater, no pun intending. Any time you feel like

486
00:32:15,960 --> 00:32:20,560
Speaker 1: you don't know which ways up? Nobody sinking, no, no sinking.

487
00:32:22,720 --> 00:32:25,200
Speaker 1: This is this is this is a great opportunity, sir.

488
00:32:25,640 --> 00:32:31,040
Speaker 1: You can go to the Truth Booth and they have

489
00:32:31,440 --> 00:32:35,600
Speaker 1: for you. So if you if you want to know

490
00:32:35,600 --> 00:32:37,200
Speaker 1: if the ship is sinking, go to the Truth Book.

491
00:32:37,280 --> 00:32:41,560
Speaker 1: You have to tell you ourselves in each other's blood,

492
00:32:42,720 --> 00:32:46,000
Speaker 1: each other, okay, each other's blood. Hi, Welcome to Thomas

493
00:32:46,000 --> 00:32:49,480
Speaker 1: Truth Booth. What can I do for you today? I

494
00:32:49,520 --> 00:32:53,320
Speaker 1: guess I'm just looking for the tradesman? All right? What's

495
00:32:53,320 --> 00:32:56,800
Speaker 1: truth would you like today? Miss? What are you gonna

496
00:32:56,880 --> 00:33:00,080
Speaker 1: tell me? What do you want to tell me? I'm

497
00:33:00,080 --> 00:33:05,120
Speaker 1: here to answer questions. I don't have any Okay, Uh, well, okay,

498
00:33:05,240 --> 00:33:08,160
Speaker 1: you know a question. Uh did you know about the

499
00:33:08,200 --> 00:33:12,360
Speaker 1: ship's thing? Oh? Yes, of course. So the truth about

500
00:33:12,400 --> 00:33:15,800
Speaker 1: that is um and everyone who thought they were going

501
00:33:15,840 --> 00:33:20,320
Speaker 1: to the Staples Center, you excuse me, is a moron

502
00:33:21,080 --> 00:33:24,680
Speaker 1: because it's nowhere near water. Obviously, and so you know

503
00:33:24,760 --> 00:33:26,600
Speaker 1: you got on a boat because you knew it was

504
00:33:26,680 --> 00:33:29,640
Speaker 1: a boat sort of thing. So there's people walking did

505
00:33:29,720 --> 00:33:32,120
Speaker 1: not look like a boat. For the record, when I

506
00:33:32,160 --> 00:33:36,600
Speaker 1: got on here a tunnel, you had it rigged like

507
00:33:36,680 --> 00:33:42,040
Speaker 1: a tunnel. And then it said Staples. That's right. It

508
00:33:42,040 --> 00:33:44,200
Speaker 1: didn't say Staples Center. That was a mistake that a

509
00:33:44,200 --> 00:33:47,240
Speaker 1: lot of people make. It said State. It said it's Staples. Yeah.

510
00:33:47,280 --> 00:33:50,240
Speaker 1: So then I got out of the tunnel, right, I'm

511
00:33:50,280 --> 00:33:57,320
Speaker 1: in a room scaboo. Yeah yeah, right, So what did

512
00:33:57,320 --> 00:34:01,240
Speaker 1: you have to send it for you? Tommy? What everything's

513
00:34:01,280 --> 00:34:03,920
Speaker 1: in it for me? Really? What? When people sleep at night?

514
00:34:04,000 --> 00:34:06,800
Speaker 1: I go in Sometimes I take their jewelry. Sometimes I'll

515
00:34:06,840 --> 00:34:11,719
Speaker 1: take ship. I hate this fucking boat man. I get

516
00:34:11,920 --> 00:34:14,440
Speaker 1: you think I'm surrounded by crooks and the phone, dude

517
00:34:14,680 --> 00:34:18,880
Speaker 1: is hard? What with the slice of fon dude can

518
00:34:18,920 --> 00:34:20,760
Speaker 1: be hard? I'll tell you what. Why don't you join

519
00:34:20,920 --> 00:34:24,080
Speaker 1: our band of merry man and women? Who sneak out

520
00:34:24,120 --> 00:34:26,479
Speaker 1: at that and still don't playing the answer months because

521
00:34:26,480 --> 00:34:28,680
Speaker 1: of what had happened to my fingers? As you can see,

522
00:34:29,120 --> 00:34:34,080
Speaker 1: Oh Matt, just have given you every Majel credit card

523
00:34:34,160 --> 00:34:39,279
Speaker 1: that I own, and you keep saying there tonight. What

524
00:34:39,360 --> 00:34:42,719
Speaker 1: did he say, Machel? He said, Majel, I'm on the

525
00:34:43,320 --> 00:34:50,000
Speaker 1: phone right now. Please let me go, Majel Dad, can

526
00:34:50,040 --> 00:34:54,839
Speaker 1: you still hear me, Sir Majel Payne? Uh, you know what,

527
00:34:55,280 --> 00:34:57,439
Speaker 1: I'm gonna need the three digit code on the back,

528
00:34:58,040 --> 00:35:02,839
Speaker 1: Majel league. Maybe it's make four or three. Don't listen

529
00:35:02,840 --> 00:35:07,440
Speaker 1: to them. They're hazing me for three nine nine, Okay

530
00:35:07,640 --> 00:35:15,399
Speaker 1: in the expiration zero three three? Okay, does it work? Yeah?

531
00:35:15,400 --> 00:35:21,480
Speaker 1: I went through? Oh, thank god, thank god. Okay, So

532
00:35:22,520 --> 00:35:26,000
Speaker 1: I'm gonna hang up now. But wait, but I don't

533
00:35:26,040 --> 00:35:30,200
Speaker 1: know what what was I giving you all those capiton capiton?

534
00:35:30,520 --> 00:35:34,680
Speaker 1: We have a problema. It looks like some obviously as

535
00:35:34,880 --> 00:35:37,960
Speaker 1: uh you know, honestly, I was going to say contestants,

536
00:35:37,960 --> 00:35:42,800
Speaker 1: but their guests, their guests on the ship have killed

537
00:35:43,200 --> 00:35:47,879
Speaker 1: and really top that the top downs off and uh

538
00:35:48,360 --> 00:35:53,200
Speaker 1: security foot it looks like they are covering themselves the

539
00:35:53,360 --> 00:35:58,400
Speaker 1: blood obviously for some virtualistic means. I am not the

540
00:35:58,640 --> 00:36:02,840
Speaker 1: hen show why, but I think that there is something

541
00:36:02,880 --> 00:36:05,799
Speaker 1: only you should know. Anyway, I hope you would get

542
00:36:05,840 --> 00:36:13,279
Speaker 1: this message. You're able to reply in some quick fashion. Okay,

543
00:36:13,280 --> 00:36:16,080
Speaker 1: maybe so, Roger, there you hear it? What am I

544
00:36:16,120 --> 00:36:19,560
Speaker 1: supposed to make of this? Well, I would say that

545
00:36:19,840 --> 00:36:23,680
Speaker 1: since it's a scam artest convention, maybe those guys are

546
00:36:23,719 --> 00:36:27,359
Speaker 1: scamming you to believe that they tore up the tap

547
00:36:27,440 --> 00:36:32,160
Speaker 1: Dancer and covert themselves in blood, and honestly, maybe maybe

548
00:36:32,200 --> 00:36:36,200
Speaker 1: everything is just it's a it's a joke. Okay, cool.

549
00:36:36,239 --> 00:36:37,799
Speaker 1: Do you want to buy into this time share or not?

550
00:36:38,760 --> 00:36:41,759
Speaker 1: I just feel like the last time Share that you

551
00:36:41,840 --> 00:36:43,600
Speaker 1: got me, I haven't even had a chance to seek.

552
00:36:43,760 --> 00:36:48,719
Speaker 1: It's always filled, right. I really think it's a good

553
00:36:48,800 --> 00:36:53,000
Speaker 1: choice for me to get into another time Share. Yes,

554
00:36:53,440 --> 00:36:57,080
Speaker 1: you're smart as than I am. Okay, everybody, we've come

555
00:36:57,120 --> 00:37:01,120
Speaker 1: to the last day of the cruise. We've had some fun,

556
00:37:01,200 --> 00:37:06,799
Speaker 1: haven't we. I just well, the way we end every

557
00:37:06,800 --> 00:37:11,240
Speaker 1: convention is we give top three prizes to the top

558
00:37:11,480 --> 00:37:14,600
Speaker 1: three scammers. Now you know them and you love them.

559
00:37:14,600 --> 00:37:17,160
Speaker 1: They're pretty much up here every year. Give it up

560
00:37:17,200 --> 00:37:24,400
Speaker 1: for ten Janet and Stevie. Oh my god, it's so sweet.

561
00:37:24,520 --> 00:37:32,560
Speaker 1: It's so sweet. Janet, Um, your favorite, your favorite, please,

562
00:37:33,080 --> 00:37:35,600
Speaker 1: so please? Um. We are we are doing what we

563
00:37:35,640 --> 00:37:37,560
Speaker 1: do every year. We are going for a dollar amount.

564
00:37:37,560 --> 00:37:40,880
Speaker 1: Whoever scammed the highest dollar amount is the Scammer of

565
00:37:40,920 --> 00:37:43,920
Speaker 1: the year. Okay, once you, we'll start with you. I

566
00:37:44,000 --> 00:37:47,360
Speaker 1: hate being so transparent that I did a lot of

567
00:37:47,360 --> 00:37:48,960
Speaker 1: good work, and I don't think any of it is

568
00:37:49,000 --> 00:37:51,680
Speaker 1: a scam. For what it's worth. I really believe in it,

569
00:37:51,719 --> 00:37:54,520
Speaker 1: and I know all my representatives really believing in We're

570
00:37:54,520 --> 00:37:57,600
Speaker 1: all part of something really important. I'm empowering women, and

571
00:37:57,600 --> 00:38:03,719
Speaker 1: I made about fifteen million dollars. Fifteen million dollars. Give

572
00:38:03,760 --> 00:38:08,040
Speaker 1: it up, everybody. I'm so proud of my diamond sellers.

573
00:38:08,120 --> 00:38:10,360
Speaker 1: I owe it all to my team, and we're just again,

574
00:38:10,400 --> 00:38:15,319
Speaker 1: once again, we're empowering women. Gentlemen YouTube up here who

575
00:38:15,320 --> 00:38:17,399
Speaker 1: are on stage, I don't imagine you made more than

576
00:38:17,400 --> 00:38:21,480
Speaker 1: fifteen million dollars. And all the bones I've collected, all

577
00:38:21,520 --> 00:38:25,160
Speaker 1: of them tell a story. They'll tell your future'll tell

578
00:38:25,160 --> 00:38:28,560
Speaker 1: your future. Okay, we can't put a dollar price on that.

579
00:38:29,200 --> 00:38:33,280
Speaker 1: Uh about you? Excuse me? Excuse me, I'm sorry, interrupt.

580
00:38:33,400 --> 00:38:36,280
Speaker 1: This man is not the host of the Scammers Convention,

581
00:38:38,520 --> 00:38:41,840
Speaker 1: the actual host. He had me tied up in a bathroom.

582
00:38:44,200 --> 00:38:46,520
Speaker 1: This is not a cruise ship, thank you, This is

583
00:38:46,520 --> 00:38:50,520
Speaker 1: a Wendy's. Everyone. We've been in a Wendy's for three days.

584
00:38:51,000 --> 00:38:56,239
Speaker 1: Oh my god, can be Oh guys, we just loved

585
00:38:56,320 --> 00:39:00,000
Speaker 1: having you here every year. And he's right, He's right. Um,

586
00:39:00,120 --> 00:39:03,319
Speaker 1: he's a scammer to scammer, scammer Kevin, Can we all

587
00:39:03,320 --> 00:39:20,200
Speaker 1: say that please? And not a scene too seen? Three

588
00:39:20,560 --> 00:39:25,680
Speaker 1: comes from Patreon Alchemaniac, who wrote, Hey alchemist, Kevin, I

589
00:39:25,719 --> 00:39:27,799
Speaker 1: know this is the part where we confess our love

590
00:39:27,920 --> 00:39:30,480
Speaker 1: or take a cheap shot at somebody, but I just

591
00:39:30,560 --> 00:39:33,640
Speaker 1: want you to go to James Heeney's twitch channel and

592
00:39:33,719 --> 00:39:37,040
Speaker 1: read his description of himself for all to hear errors

593
00:39:37,080 --> 00:39:40,800
Speaker 1: and all. Here's my scene suggestion Skydiving School, signed to

594
00:39:40,800 --> 00:39:42,799
Speaker 1: Alabaster Crew. Tell you I know I read a dug

595
00:39:42,880 --> 00:39:44,759
Speaker 1: you before, but this was too good to pass up.

596
00:39:45,440 --> 00:39:49,799
Speaker 1: Um and say. This is actually James's twitch bio and

597
00:39:49,840 --> 00:39:54,000
Speaker 1: it reads as follows. I'm a top tier competitive gamer,

598
00:39:54,160 --> 00:39:59,880
Speaker 1: best known experts walkthroughs mhmm. Typically I don't brag, but

599
00:40:00,080 --> 00:40:03,440
Speaker 1: most of my runs are speed runs. I'm not trying

600
00:40:03,520 --> 00:40:08,319
Speaker 1: to complete them fast. I just can't it if it

601
00:40:08,360 --> 00:40:13,280
Speaker 1: makes me, it makes you feel better about your skill.

602
00:40:13,880 --> 00:40:17,160
Speaker 1: Simply not being the slowest or worst ranks you as

603
00:40:17,480 --> 00:40:21,920
Speaker 1: one of the best. Wow, that's great, Thank you, thank you.

604
00:40:22,600 --> 00:40:24,640
Speaker 1: I wish I had written it down. There's a couple

605
00:40:24,640 --> 00:40:28,680
Speaker 1: of spelling errors I think in there. No, no, it's perfect.

606
00:40:29,480 --> 00:40:34,840
Speaker 1: Um again has seen suggesting with skydiving school. All right,

607
00:40:34,880 --> 00:40:36,799
Speaker 1: so I'm looking over your profile here and there's a

608
00:40:36,800 --> 00:40:44,799
Speaker 1: lot of errors. Second. No, okay, so the profile has

609
00:40:44,800 --> 00:40:47,120
Speaker 1: a lot of errors, and you know, we want to

610
00:40:47,160 --> 00:40:51,839
Speaker 1: have every one of our teachers here. Um, I don't think.

611
00:40:51,880 --> 00:40:54,520
Speaker 1: I like the way it turns out that running it out.

612
00:40:54,560 --> 00:40:57,120
Speaker 1: I like the way it turned out. Okay, sniffle, I

613
00:40:57,200 --> 00:40:58,480
Speaker 1: know that. Can you just go back and make sure

614
00:40:58,480 --> 00:41:02,520
Speaker 1: the parachutes are folded? Thank you. Okay, I'll see my way.

615
00:41:02,600 --> 00:41:07,560
Speaker 1: I'll see my way. It's a conference, okay. And no

616
00:41:07,719 --> 00:41:14,719
Speaker 1: smoking snoofing. Okay, you're lighting the vapor, you're you have

617
00:41:14,760 --> 00:41:21,880
Speaker 1: a lighter on the vapor. Rick Okay, she's uh, she's

618
00:41:22,000 --> 00:41:24,439
Speaker 1: she owns it, so I can't really fire her. But

619
00:41:24,800 --> 00:41:27,400
Speaker 1: the profile has just a lot of errors on there.

620
00:41:27,440 --> 00:41:28,560
Speaker 1: And we just want to make sure people go to

621
00:41:28,600 --> 00:41:30,800
Speaker 1: the website. They see, they see they go to jumpers

622
00:41:30,800 --> 00:41:35,280
Speaker 1: dot com. Uh, you know, they they get a good taste,

623
00:41:35,560 --> 00:41:38,120
Speaker 1: a safe taste of who we are before they you know,

624
00:41:38,160 --> 00:41:40,879
Speaker 1: they put their lives on our chests and our groin.

625
00:41:41,080 --> 00:41:44,440
Speaker 1: So let's um, let's let's just go over this a

626
00:41:44,440 --> 00:41:47,759
Speaker 1: little bit here and uh tell me, actually, you know,

627
00:41:47,880 --> 00:41:50,280
Speaker 1: once you read it, and tell me what do you think? Okay,

628
00:41:50,440 --> 00:41:52,200
Speaker 1: tell me where you think I might I might have

629
00:41:52,239 --> 00:41:57,759
Speaker 1: some issue. Uh, this third part doesn't make a lot

630
00:41:57,760 --> 00:42:02,759
Speaker 1: of sense to me. Wrote, so you tell me. Tell

631
00:42:02,800 --> 00:42:04,680
Speaker 1: you what I just said. It doesn't make a lot

632
00:42:04,680 --> 00:42:06,600
Speaker 1: of sense, that's all. Yeah, I know you wrote it.

633
00:42:06,640 --> 00:42:10,160
Speaker 1: You tell me what you think it meets. Well, I

634
00:42:10,200 --> 00:42:12,920
Speaker 1: can't really read my own writing, so I guess what

635
00:42:12,960 --> 00:42:15,680
Speaker 1: I'm trying to say is it's on your website. This

636
00:42:15,800 --> 00:42:18,880
Speaker 1: would love I would love to hear your take on

637
00:42:18,920 --> 00:42:20,879
Speaker 1: it and see if you can make sense of it,

638
00:42:21,400 --> 00:42:24,799
Speaker 1: so then I could rewrite it. Sure, I'll go from

639
00:42:24,800 --> 00:42:30,960
Speaker 1: a third paragraph. Please. I had many jumps. It benefits

640
00:42:31,000 --> 00:42:34,520
Speaker 1: me to do them. Hey, how you doing. I'm I'm

641
00:42:34,520 --> 00:42:36,760
Speaker 1: I'm Michael. I'm it's my first day here at school,

642
00:42:36,880 --> 00:42:39,720
Speaker 1: scott Diving School. I'm nervous. I'm excited. I've nervousd I'm excited.

643
00:42:42,160 --> 00:42:44,880
Speaker 1: You you knew here and you you can take classes

644
00:42:44,880 --> 00:42:47,880
Speaker 1: here for a while or how many jobs. I'm a

645
00:42:47,960 --> 00:42:53,400
Speaker 1: secret shopper. I'm judging this skydiving school, so I'd like

646
00:42:53,480 --> 00:42:56,200
Speaker 1: to keep that between you and me. You shouldn't have

647
00:42:56,239 --> 00:43:01,440
Speaker 1: told me I just overheard that. I ever heard that. Um, well,

648
00:43:01,480 --> 00:43:04,920
Speaker 1: you guys don't work here, do you? You're just but

649
00:43:05,000 --> 00:43:07,480
Speaker 1: I don't. I don't like knowing that. I don't want

650
00:43:07,520 --> 00:43:10,719
Speaker 1: to know that. Well, I'm going to pretend to be

651
00:43:10,800 --> 00:43:13,279
Speaker 1: pretty not good at skydiving, but I'm gonna let you

652
00:43:13,320 --> 00:43:17,240
Speaker 1: guys know right forward. I'm an expert skydiver. In fact,

653
00:43:18,400 --> 00:43:29,040
Speaker 1: you're gonna let us know right forward. I don't understand you.

654
00:43:30,440 --> 00:43:33,239
Speaker 1: I dropped out of college for this. Okay, Well, I

655
00:43:33,239 --> 00:43:36,560
Speaker 1: wouldn't do that, No, I did. I am telling my

656
00:43:36,600 --> 00:43:40,160
Speaker 1: family that this school is as accredited as any other school.

657
00:43:40,680 --> 00:43:44,279
Speaker 1: It's not. It's not as as accredited as any other

658
00:43:44,320 --> 00:43:47,879
Speaker 1: school has seven three point five star reviews on yelps.

659
00:43:47,920 --> 00:43:53,120
Speaker 1: So you tell me, bud. Let me be forthright with you. Okay, okay, uh,

660
00:43:53,160 --> 00:43:57,640
Speaker 1: there is no future in caking classes here. Your best

661
00:43:57,640 --> 00:44:04,120
Speaker 1: case scenario is that you don't know when hit the ground. Hey, jumper, cruise,

662
00:44:04,200 --> 00:44:10,160
Speaker 1: It's like call my little jumpers hello, Hi. Hi decided

663
00:44:10,280 --> 00:44:16,520
Speaker 1: to skydive. Can't wait. Everybody here is a student. Yes, huh,

664
00:44:16,880 --> 00:44:22,719
Speaker 1: he never skype. I hate my money. M who's gonna

665
00:44:22,760 --> 00:44:25,399
Speaker 1: take us up? Anybody? Or I got the guys that's

666
00:44:25,400 --> 00:44:27,680
Speaker 1: gonna take you up. He's a really good guy. Those

667
00:44:27,719 --> 00:44:30,440
Speaker 1: the drive planes. He's the best plane driver. And with God,

668
00:44:30,920 --> 00:44:33,480
Speaker 1: should we have should we have a parachute on? At

669
00:44:33,520 --> 00:44:36,680
Speaker 1: this point, I don't get taken care of it on

670
00:44:36,719 --> 00:44:40,520
Speaker 1: a different stuff. That's a reminder. So she Scott scut driving.

671
00:44:40,560 --> 00:44:43,800
Speaker 1: It's a metaphor for last or jump into it and

672
00:44:44,640 --> 00:44:48,799
Speaker 1: gets what's the dream for You're gonna land even if

673
00:44:48,800 --> 00:44:53,359
Speaker 1: you miss, You're gonna land among the stars. Okay, so

674
00:44:53,440 --> 00:44:56,600
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna I'm glad. Please let's make a good

675
00:44:56,680 --> 00:45:00,120
Speaker 1: yell for review one of my plane driver. It's is

676
00:45:00,120 --> 00:45:07,200
Speaker 1: gonna take up metaphor. Yeah, I'm gonna write that down

677
00:45:07,200 --> 00:45:10,600
Speaker 1: on my paper. They aren't plane drivers, overy one. This

678
00:45:10,719 --> 00:45:14,359
Speaker 1: is your plane driver, Trent. Uh. We're gonna be headed

679
00:45:14,400 --> 00:45:19,120
Speaker 1: up to about feet today and uh, just enjoy like

680
00:45:19,120 --> 00:45:21,600
Speaker 1: a nice smooth ride. Not a lot of clouds in

681
00:45:21,600 --> 00:45:25,200
Speaker 1: the sky. Looks pretty blue and clear. Uh. Just to

682
00:45:25,200 --> 00:45:29,880
Speaker 1: be sure all of you are accredited skydivers because we

683
00:45:30,000 --> 00:45:33,640
Speaker 1: will be throwing you out of a plane today. Uh.

684
00:45:33,640 --> 00:45:36,640
Speaker 1: If there's anybody who has any issue with that, please

685
00:45:36,719 --> 00:45:42,960
Speaker 1: let one of our attendants know. Right now, the plane driver, Trent. Okay,

686
00:45:42,960 --> 00:45:46,759
Speaker 1: I see somebody is ringing a bell um. Somebody's gonna

687
00:45:46,760 --> 00:45:50,000
Speaker 1: be right with you. We're about we're about two minutes

688
00:45:50,040 --> 00:45:53,560
Speaker 1: from you being thrown out of a plane. Hey, buddy,

689
00:45:53,600 --> 00:45:56,440
Speaker 1: put your hand down. I think that's a recording. All right,

690
00:45:56,600 --> 00:46:00,680
Speaker 1: listen up, we're about two minutes out. You heard Trent. Now,

691
00:46:00,719 --> 00:46:05,200
Speaker 1: everyone hook on to the line. Hook on to the line.

692
00:46:07,760 --> 00:46:11,600
Speaker 1: You shut the funk up. Everyone shut the alright now listen,

693
00:46:11,880 --> 00:46:18,920
Speaker 1: I'm gonna go slash and shoes night. Okay, almost hacking

694
00:46:18,960 --> 00:46:24,680
Speaker 1: and slash. Hold hook on to the line. Hold on

695
00:46:24,840 --> 00:46:28,560
Speaker 1: this kid, line, Hold on. This kid's crying. Hold up.

696
00:46:28,840 --> 00:46:32,080
Speaker 1: I'm not a kid in thirty eight, but as your

697
00:46:32,160 --> 00:46:36,200
Speaker 1: kid to me, I don't understand. I don't understand what

698
00:46:36,280 --> 00:46:39,600
Speaker 1: I'm supposed to hook You're supposed to hook on to

699
00:46:39,840 --> 00:46:42,919
Speaker 1: the line, right, I don't think they have a Look

700
00:46:44,200 --> 00:46:50,440
Speaker 1: this carapeener, you take and toss this one out right now? Ready? Man? Okay,

701
00:46:51,080 --> 00:46:53,400
Speaker 1: that right? You saw what happened. You just threw that

702
00:46:53,520 --> 00:46:56,680
Speaker 1: lady out the door. Hey everyone, this is your plane

703
00:46:56,760 --> 00:47:00,959
Speaker 1: driver Trent, once again looking like a beautiful day out there.

704
00:47:01,120 --> 00:47:05,000
Speaker 1: It couldn't be clear recording this is this is a recording.

705
00:47:05,400 --> 00:47:09,520
Speaker 1: Uh and uh we're probably on autopilot right now. There's

706
00:47:09,600 --> 00:47:14,080
Speaker 1: chances are that I'm not really here. Um, but anyway,

707
00:47:14,320 --> 00:47:19,799
Speaker 1: I hope you enjoy beautiful red. Okay, hey, hey, you're

708
00:47:19,840 --> 00:47:22,319
Speaker 1: the expert, you're the undercover shopper. Help us do some

709
00:47:22,400 --> 00:47:25,319
Speaker 1: tell anybody this. I'll tell you one thing. Don't jump

710
00:47:25,320 --> 00:47:28,200
Speaker 1: out with that bowie knife parachute. That's for goddamn sure her.

711
00:47:28,239 --> 00:47:31,279
Speaker 1: So what do I do? I need help? When you're

712
00:47:31,320 --> 00:47:34,440
Speaker 1: half way down, look for me. I brought my own parachute,

713
00:47:34,480 --> 00:47:37,200
Speaker 1: just because, you know, if you're a secret chopper and

714
00:47:37,239 --> 00:47:39,560
Speaker 1: you go to a bad skydiving schools and you need

715
00:47:39,600 --> 00:47:43,080
Speaker 1: to get on with you, I gets that makes sense. Okay,

716
00:47:42,280 --> 00:47:46,080
Speaker 1: if this would be a great time to check your parachute.

717
00:47:46,400 --> 00:47:49,280
Speaker 1: If there are any holes or wounds of any kind

718
00:47:49,360 --> 00:47:52,319
Speaker 1: and your parachute, just ring your bell and one of

719
00:47:52,320 --> 00:47:55,799
Speaker 1: our attendants will get you another one. I wouldn't do that.

720
00:47:55,800 --> 00:47:58,080
Speaker 1: That guy put the get out of request for a

721
00:47:58,120 --> 00:48:01,719
Speaker 1: new parachute. You sir, Yes, sir, all right, I'm gonna

722
00:48:01,760 --> 00:48:03,839
Speaker 1: give you to a new parasute. All right, so both

723
00:48:03,840 --> 00:48:07,279
Speaker 1: of you come on, pop them up. Here you go.

724
00:48:07,480 --> 00:48:10,360
Speaker 1: Mine's wounded. It looks like you've got a smaller backpack

725
00:48:10,440 --> 00:48:12,120
Speaker 1: or some kind of parasue. Don't you start give it up.

726
00:48:12,160 --> 00:48:17,520
Speaker 1: That's that's mine, that's my that's my medicine. I have diabetes,

727
00:48:19,040 --> 00:48:21,520
Speaker 1: so do I, sir? Come on, give it up. No,

728
00:48:21,560 --> 00:48:24,280
Speaker 1: I'm not giving this up. This is my lifeline here. Okay,

729
00:48:24,440 --> 00:48:26,800
Speaker 1: I need this back, sir. There's a lot of sugar

730
00:48:26,840 --> 00:48:29,160
Speaker 1: on the ground. I actually know a little Kami Kane Tray.

731
00:48:29,239 --> 00:48:32,040
Speaker 1: I'm not give it up. Come off, seriously, listen, Okay,

732
00:48:32,239 --> 00:48:34,759
Speaker 1: I'm gonna be really open here. I'm a I'm a

733
00:48:34,880 --> 00:48:39,200
Speaker 1: secret shopper, skydiver school guy. So we're all scared the

734
00:48:39,239 --> 00:48:42,120
Speaker 1: first time. Just give up the facts or don't take

735
00:48:42,160 --> 00:48:50,520
Speaker 1: it from me. This is mine, O ship. Now what

736
00:48:50,560 --> 00:48:54,239
Speaker 1: are we doing? If everybody know what to do? This

737
00:48:54,280 --> 00:48:57,440
Speaker 1: is your plane driver, Trent Apparely one of our engines

738
00:48:57,520 --> 00:49:01,400
Speaker 1: is out, so we're gonna try to make an emergency landing.

739
00:49:01,440 --> 00:49:04,440
Speaker 1: We are about ten minutes away from any airports. This

740
00:49:04,480 --> 00:49:08,319
Speaker 1: is a recording by the way, let's is the recording.

741
00:49:08,480 --> 00:49:11,160
Speaker 1: I just want to come in and say thanks for

742
00:49:11,520 --> 00:49:14,279
Speaker 1: trying this service. I guess the only person here to

743
00:49:14,400 --> 00:49:18,239
Speaker 1: hear this part usually is just the plane driver. Uh

744
00:49:18,360 --> 00:49:21,040
Speaker 1: So to the plane drivers, I know you guys are

745
00:49:21,080 --> 00:49:23,840
Speaker 1: the best in the bills. And remember and encourage everybody

746
00:49:23,920 --> 00:49:26,400
Speaker 1: using a YALP review because it's just the house that

747
00:49:26,520 --> 00:49:32,280
Speaker 1: yelp bill. We're gathered here today to remember not only

748
00:49:32,560 --> 00:49:36,560
Speaker 1: the lives lost, but we have a question. Let's just

749
00:49:37,520 --> 00:49:42,360
Speaker 1: we have a question. Yeah, I have a question. Um

750
00:49:42,760 --> 00:49:48,359
Speaker 1: where are the restrooms? Um? I don't knows my first time.

751
00:49:48,520 --> 00:49:50,560
Speaker 1: I think they're actually I think they're actually behind me.

752
00:49:50,640 --> 00:49:55,920
Speaker 1: So don't you just come on excuse me part of me.

753
00:49:56,880 --> 00:49:59,560
Speaker 1: So we're here today to remember the lives slash as

754
00:49:59,560 --> 00:50:03,239
Speaker 1: well as as well as remembered not even though this

755
00:50:03,320 --> 00:50:06,080
Speaker 1: is a set time to put to not make that

756
00:50:06,200 --> 00:50:09,319
Speaker 1: grief virtual. Right, Let's lets make sure that you are

757
00:50:09,360 --> 00:50:15,680
Speaker 1: still positive. Okay, let's so let's just and I think

758
00:50:15,760 --> 00:50:18,399
Speaker 1: that's all that's it. So let's just get to put

759
00:50:18,440 --> 00:50:21,920
Speaker 1: it und We're gonna put the bodies in the ground

760
00:50:21,920 --> 00:50:30,080
Speaker 1: now and uh, yumba baby, bye, yamba baby. This is

761
00:50:30,960 --> 00:50:34,440
Speaker 1: excuse me, excuse me. This man is not the funeral director.

762
00:50:35,440 --> 00:50:38,080
Speaker 1: Oh no, he's He's had me tied up and it's

763
00:50:38,080 --> 00:50:42,560
Speaker 1: a brave weekend. I can't believe that I survived. But

764
00:50:42,719 --> 00:50:45,640
Speaker 1: I'm here to do the the actual service. Wait wait, wait,

765
00:50:45,680 --> 00:50:47,120
Speaker 1: why is your harald messed up? You look at a

766
00:50:47,200 --> 00:50:51,440
Speaker 1: crazy person. Look I I who's who died? Okay, just

767
00:50:51,520 --> 00:50:53,640
Speaker 1: give me, give me the basics. I can give you

768
00:50:53,680 --> 00:50:56,879
Speaker 1: a good service. So what what's this guy's crime here?

769
00:50:56,960 --> 00:51:01,759
Speaker 1: He's just he's doing a nice service. He is. Yeah,

770
00:51:01,840 --> 00:51:04,280
Speaker 1: he's doing some kind of song. We're have some chance, beautiful,

771
00:51:04,320 --> 00:51:07,080
Speaker 1: it's uplifting all of our spirits. Am I right? Yeah?

772
00:51:07,960 --> 00:51:11,279
Speaker 1: I felt loudly kind of wrapped everything up for my

773
00:51:12,320 --> 00:51:17,120
Speaker 1: my experience. Look, I I I apologize. I I thought

774
00:51:17,160 --> 00:51:20,440
Speaker 1: you were being scammed, but clearly you're You're getting a

775
00:51:20,480 --> 00:51:22,640
Speaker 1: good service here, So just leave a good review on

776
00:51:22,760 --> 00:51:25,160
Speaker 1: help and uh, you know not all scam artists are

777
00:51:25,200 --> 00:51:28,520
Speaker 1: here just to take. Sometimes we do this to get back. Okay,

778
00:51:30,640 --> 00:51:35,080
Speaker 1: Oh my god, Jesus, sorry, I'm like, is this Thompson wedding? Oh? Ken,

779
00:51:35,200 --> 00:51:37,400
Speaker 1: I can't believe I didn't miss it. No, it's a funeral.

780
00:51:37,480 --> 00:51:42,520
Speaker 1: This is a this is a funeral. Fuck, you can

781
00:51:42,600 --> 00:51:45,440
Speaker 1: hang out, you can stay all right? Thanks? Thanks man?

782
00:51:46,840 --> 00:51:50,319
Speaker 1: You know this actually, Um, if I can talk again, Yeah,

783
00:51:50,360 --> 00:51:53,560
Speaker 1: I mean it's true. I'm I'm a scam artist. I

784
00:51:53,920 --> 00:51:56,680
Speaker 1: didn't actually go to school to be a funeral director.

785
00:51:58,040 --> 00:51:59,840
Speaker 1: But maybe sometimes you don't have to go to school

786
00:52:01,040 --> 00:52:06,000
Speaker 1: to actually find your path in education. Education, it's what's

787
00:52:06,040 --> 00:52:08,839
Speaker 1: blocking us from being smarter. Maybe if we tend at

788
00:52:08,840 --> 00:52:14,160
Speaker 1: the universities out, yeah, everyone will know. Yeah. Maybe the

789
00:52:14,280 --> 00:52:18,520
Speaker 1: problem is that that some people know and some people don't.

790
00:52:18,600 --> 00:52:22,279
Speaker 1: People don't know. Maybe if you're saying there's good scammers

791
00:52:22,360 --> 00:52:28,040
Speaker 1: and bad scammers, I think what he's saying is he's

792
00:52:28,080 --> 00:52:30,920
Speaker 1: saying he's saying, don't go to school. Well, well let

793
00:52:31,000 --> 00:52:33,480
Speaker 1: me let me finish. And furthermore, if you do go

794
00:52:33,560 --> 00:52:35,719
Speaker 1: to school, go to the right school to unlearn what

795
00:52:35,840 --> 00:52:39,080
Speaker 1: you've learned, ladies and gentlemen. And what I'm saying here

796
00:52:39,160 --> 00:52:43,200
Speaker 1: is I encourage everyone here at this FI either start

797
00:52:43,239 --> 00:52:49,640
Speaker 1: their own schools or never go to school again. Yeah. Now,

798
00:52:49,760 --> 00:52:52,680
Speaker 1: let's let's dig these bodies up and let's give them

799
00:52:52,719 --> 00:52:55,759
Speaker 1: the proper barrier they deserve, which is being thrown out

800
00:52:55,800 --> 00:53:03,920
Speaker 1: of the plane. Okay, Tim, is it? Uh, we just

801
00:53:04,040 --> 00:53:07,560
Speaker 1: need one Yeah, we just need one more recording. Please

802
00:53:08,000 --> 00:53:13,040
Speaker 1: this time you're unable to get to the phone and

803
00:53:13,160 --> 00:53:18,280
Speaker 1: you have a problem with your plumber. Problem with your plumber. Okay,

804
00:53:18,320 --> 00:53:21,160
Speaker 1: So this this is going to cover every possible scenario

805
00:53:21,600 --> 00:53:26,680
Speaker 1: that we might need for you your plumber. Yeah, okay.

806
00:53:27,040 --> 00:53:29,839
Speaker 1: I mean you're also leaving a message for people who

807
00:53:29,920 --> 00:53:37,120
Speaker 1: call it. Great. Hi, this is Tim. I'm not in

808
00:53:37,320 --> 00:53:39,279
Speaker 1: right now, but if you leave a message after the

809
00:53:39,280 --> 00:53:42,360
Speaker 1: people'll get back to you. By the way, if this

810
00:53:42,960 --> 00:53:47,759
Speaker 1: is uh my plumber, uh, we are knee deep in

811
00:53:47,880 --> 00:53:53,480
Speaker 1: ship right now. Uh. Somehow the sewage line got confused

812
00:53:53,520 --> 00:53:56,920
Speaker 1: with the regular pipe and is pumping out fecal matter

813
00:53:57,080 --> 00:54:00,880
Speaker 1: at a rate that I've never seen. Hum. So I

814
00:54:01,000 --> 00:54:03,360
Speaker 1: hope it's you, Honestly, I hope that it's you calling.

815
00:54:03,480 --> 00:54:05,520
Speaker 1: If it's not, I apologize for you people who have

816
00:54:05,640 --> 00:54:09,359
Speaker 1: to listen to this. But this is Tim, and please

817
00:54:09,440 --> 00:54:12,600
Speaker 1: get back to me. That's a cut that was really

818
00:54:12,640 --> 00:54:16,160
Speaker 1: good to really good work. It's been such a long day.

819
00:54:16,920 --> 00:54:19,000
Speaker 1: I mean, we we have recorded two thousands of these.

820
00:54:19,440 --> 00:54:21,920
Speaker 1: You're a pro. You're a pro. And just just to

821
00:54:22,000 --> 00:54:24,200
Speaker 1: remind you, we're gonna. We're gonna add the beep in post.

822
00:54:24,320 --> 00:54:29,239
Speaker 1: Is that is that right, Scott? Yeah, that's right. Okay, Um, Tim,

823
00:54:29,360 --> 00:54:31,920
Speaker 1: one last thing, Um, you just said one last thing.

824
00:54:32,360 --> 00:54:35,799
Speaker 1: You No, this is not this isn't a recording. It's

825
00:54:35,800 --> 00:54:39,600
Speaker 1: more about your contract. Um. We were confused. We didn't

826
00:54:40,239 --> 00:54:42,560
Speaker 1: so you said you were a union. We didn't know

827
00:54:42,800 --> 00:54:47,279
Speaker 1: we were not. This is not a union gig. Um. So,

828
00:54:48,320 --> 00:54:50,360
Speaker 1: but you've signed the contracts. We get to use your

829
00:54:50,440 --> 00:54:57,799
Speaker 1: likenessam Im never gonna Okay, alone is alone? Stop eating

830
00:54:57,880 --> 00:55:01,239
Speaker 1: my hand? What are you doing? Do shight at salami? Man?

831
00:55:01,360 --> 00:55:05,480
Speaker 1: I'm not a salami. I am a human being. Okay,

832
00:55:06,600 --> 00:55:10,239
Speaker 1: I know you'll look. I I can't repay the loan

833
00:55:10,400 --> 00:55:13,640
Speaker 1: I took out. I took out eight hundred dollars to

834
00:55:13,760 --> 00:55:17,279
Speaker 1: join after Okay, and it turns out it's a non

835
00:55:17,480 --> 00:55:24,279
Speaker 1: union voiceover gig recording. Two thousand voicemail messages from my

836
00:55:24,400 --> 00:55:27,600
Speaker 1: own home. Okay, I think I got scammed. I don't

837
00:55:27,640 --> 00:55:29,840
Speaker 1: know what happened. I think I got scammed. Then, I

838
00:55:29,840 --> 00:55:32,439
Speaker 1: don't know the time. Right now, you a million dollars?

839
00:55:33,360 --> 00:55:36,399
Speaker 1: How is that even possible? Alright, everybody, if you look

840
00:55:36,440 --> 00:55:39,360
Speaker 1: at your nose we're over the Grand Canyon, so stop

841
00:55:39,400 --> 00:55:42,719
Speaker 1: any business you might be having, any conversations you might have.

842
00:55:43,239 --> 00:55:46,520
Speaker 1: It's time to jump, all right, you want to go

843
00:55:46,680 --> 00:55:51,239
Speaker 1: down with me, Mr Potto, I'm not gonna let that

844
00:55:51,280 --> 00:55:59,040
Speaker 1: shows go alone. He good? What you need? You real good? Right?

845
00:55:59,120 --> 00:56:04,399
Speaker 1: Need my ribs? Yeah? Yeah, yeah, we've god yeah next year.

846
00:56:06,680 --> 00:56:09,359
Speaker 1: Dam give him your dressage you want to feel it. Look,

847
00:56:09,400 --> 00:56:15,320
Speaker 1: I'm not giving you my rim cord. Jump jump jump

848
00:56:15,520 --> 00:56:26,960
Speaker 1: jump jop JP. This is tub I'm currently plummeting feet.

849
00:56:27,280 --> 00:56:30,200
Speaker 1: I'm not in right now. Hopefully I'll land on my

850
00:56:30,320 --> 00:56:33,759
Speaker 1: feet and be alive. If if I die, I don't

851
00:56:33,800 --> 00:56:35,960
Speaker 1: have a parachute. It's chances are they going to die?

852
00:56:36,000 --> 00:56:38,600
Speaker 1: But leave a message up of the beep. Anyway, that's

853
00:56:38,600 --> 00:56:45,520
Speaker 1: our show for today. Who oh man. That is the

854
00:56:45,920 --> 00:56:51,320
Speaker 1: greatest Thank you. Also ever damn much. Our beloved Vanessa

855
00:56:51,440 --> 00:56:54,480
Speaker 1: Ragland had to hop off, so we'll say goodbye to

856
00:56:54,520 --> 00:56:57,320
Speaker 1: her and thank her very much for joining us during

857
00:56:57,480 --> 00:56:59,880
Speaker 1: the show. But we'll do no form. We'll go to

858
00:57:00,360 --> 00:57:04,919
Speaker 1: Dynasty typewriter dot com for calendars and informations. Some great

859
00:57:05,000 --> 00:57:07,880
Speaker 1: classes now that are there, and we thank Vanessa Odagan

860
00:57:07,960 --> 00:57:11,000
Speaker 1: for for coming back to the fold. The fans love it,

861
00:57:11,000 --> 00:57:14,520
Speaker 1: and we love her even more so. Thank her, Craig Atkowski,

862
00:57:14,600 --> 00:57:17,320
Speaker 1: thank you for making it safely back home my pleasure.

863
00:57:18,640 --> 00:57:21,080
Speaker 1: There was a fan request for one of my famous

864
00:57:21,600 --> 00:57:26,080
Speaker 1: uh word derivations. Uh, and I think it was fleshed

865
00:57:26,120 --> 00:57:30,040
Speaker 1: out versus flushed out. Uh. Do people really say that

866
00:57:30,160 --> 00:57:34,400
Speaker 1: they flushed out a plan? Uh? You flesh out a plan. Uh,

867
00:57:34,520 --> 00:57:36,600
Speaker 1: you flesh out if you're a writer, you flesh out

868
00:57:36,640 --> 00:57:40,320
Speaker 1: of character or an idea. Um. And it's just basically

869
00:57:40,440 --> 00:57:43,240
Speaker 1: making it more concrete, making it more human. What you

870
00:57:43,360 --> 00:57:47,000
Speaker 1: flush out, you flush out game. So if you're trying

871
00:57:47,040 --> 00:57:50,960
Speaker 1: to get to get a pheasant or a fox or something,

872
00:57:51,000 --> 00:57:55,120
Speaker 1: you flush that out of a bush. Uh. And metaphorically

873
00:57:55,160 --> 00:58:00,240
Speaker 1: you can flush out an uncomfortable truth. Thank you for that,

874
00:58:00,600 --> 00:58:03,800
Speaker 1: And fans go ahead and Christ just a real quick

875
00:58:03,880 --> 00:58:05,720
Speaker 1: And when you're when you're trying to line up two

876
00:58:05,720 --> 00:58:09,760
Speaker 1: pieces of board to get them trying to get them flush,

877
00:58:09,920 --> 00:58:12,440
Speaker 1: that's making it making it flush Okay, I end up

878
00:58:12,440 --> 00:58:16,360
Speaker 1: with making a flesh also. Um, if there's uh, if

879
00:58:16,400 --> 00:58:19,000
Speaker 1: there's poop in a bowl with water I want to get,

880
00:58:20,320 --> 00:58:24,360
Speaker 1: don't flush it, don't flush it? Okay, Please write to

881
00:58:24,520 --> 00:58:28,480
Speaker 1: your name here dot com for more of those word

882
00:58:29,720 --> 00:58:34,520
Speaker 1: help and correction, because you can never have enough. I

883
00:58:34,640 --> 00:58:40,040
Speaker 1: have found Joey Greer me. Thank you so much for

884
00:58:40,120 --> 00:58:42,600
Speaker 1: being here, sir. Where should folks look for you? Else?

885
00:58:42,640 --> 00:58:45,880
Speaker 1: We should look for me out in the forests, search

886
00:58:46,040 --> 00:58:48,200
Speaker 1: for me on the high plane. Okay, you know, I'm sorry.

887
00:58:48,200 --> 00:58:54,320
Speaker 1: I just dig deep into the screaming my name that

888
00:58:55,600 --> 00:59:00,320
Speaker 1: in favor. Chris dash Alvarado dot com, thank you so

889
00:59:00,400 --> 00:59:03,200
Speaker 1: much for being here. Of course, find me on Reddit.

890
00:59:03,320 --> 00:59:06,280
Speaker 1: I gotta tell you, it's crazy. The person who kind

891
00:59:06,280 --> 00:59:08,200
Speaker 1: of like does a lot of the Reddit stuff maybe

892
00:59:08,240 --> 00:59:11,840
Speaker 1: started the room tagged my name, so I can't just

893
00:59:11,960 --> 00:59:14,040
Speaker 1: kind of like you know, I can't. I can't like

894
00:59:14,240 --> 00:59:17,720
Speaker 1: do a comment after everyone knows it's me, which is

895
00:59:18,160 --> 00:59:19,760
Speaker 1: I don't. I don't know how to work Reddit, but

896
00:59:19,840 --> 00:59:23,040
Speaker 1: it's just this first bronto. Regardless. I love interacting with

897
00:59:23,120 --> 00:59:26,480
Speaker 1: the fans. I love recently they just yesterday somebody posted

898
00:59:26,560 --> 00:59:30,200
Speaker 1: what was your favorite song that was sung? And I

899
00:59:31,160 --> 00:59:34,680
Speaker 1: I have a favorite Let's all eat beef? Remember that

900
00:59:34,880 --> 00:59:41,040
Speaker 1: was that was that was mentioned? Yeah? Come on, I

901
00:59:41,120 --> 00:59:46,480
Speaker 1: can't remember how Yeah, it was just like that. How

902
00:59:46,560 --> 00:59:50,200
Speaker 1: do you go? Well? Yes, more Reddit, and thank you

903
00:59:50,280 --> 00:59:55,919
Speaker 1: for reporting from Reddit. That's greatly appreciated. James Zeeney, Well,

904
00:59:56,240 --> 01:00:00,680
Speaker 1: you should check out twitch dot tv, m flash b

905
01:00:01,120 --> 01:00:06,160
Speaker 1: s Comedy and that's where bare Supply is doing live shows. Now, okay,

906
01:00:06,320 --> 01:00:10,320
Speaker 1: and I'll be by seven am tomorrow for this guy diving. Yes.

907
01:00:10,720 --> 01:00:14,280
Speaker 1: Oh wait that tomorrow tomorrow. It is tomorrow tomorrow. I

908
01:00:14,400 --> 01:00:16,880
Speaker 1: lost track of time. I don't know if I'm still free.

909
01:00:18,080 --> 01:00:20,880
Speaker 1: That's right. I think didn't turn out good in this episode, Kevin.

910
01:00:21,040 --> 01:00:26,200
Speaker 1: People are dying. Yep, that's the idea. Let's thank our

911
01:00:26,640 --> 01:00:32,120
Speaker 1: engineering producer to the stars, Mr Doug Baine. I fine,

912
01:00:32,160 --> 01:00:37,160
Speaker 1: folks that I heart media. I'm host Kevin Boll reminding

913
01:00:37,160 --> 01:00:38,760
Speaker 1: you to please look out for each other. Wear masks

914
01:00:38,760 --> 01:00:42,600
Speaker 1: when you go outside and in the future, from when

915
01:00:42,640 --> 01:00:45,800
Speaker 1: we're recording this and you're listening to these episodes, there

916
01:00:45,920 --> 01:00:47,880
Speaker 1: was a time where we had to wear masks and

917
01:00:47,960 --> 01:00:55,560
Speaker 1: when we went outside. Okay, until next time, remember love

918
01:00:55,640 --> 01:01:22,120
Speaker 1: you and a football pepper, Hello and a football pepper.

919
01:01:22,320 --> 01:01:22,520
Speaker 1: All