WEBVTT - Being Bold and Beautiful 0:00:06.240 --> 0:00:14.280 Hey, hey, hey, we're back. We're black, We're brown and 0:00:15.040 --> 0:00:20.479 a bishous ambitious ambition, ambition, ambition, Hey, mandra, just a 0:00:20.480 --> 0:00:24.200 little glow, a little glow ooh sorry if we're talking 0:00:24.239 --> 0:00:25.080 about we're glow. 0:00:25.840 --> 0:00:29.240 There is this, you know, like everybody's now into Korean 0:00:29.280 --> 0:00:31.479 beauty and I told myself I was not gonna jump on, 0:00:32.240 --> 0:00:35.319 but there's this bomb like this. 0:00:35.479 --> 0:00:37.160 Oh, I should have brought with me this. I saw 0:00:37.200 --> 0:00:38.279 it on social. 0:00:38.440 --> 0:00:41.440 And like, I think a lot of people don't realize 0:00:41.440 --> 0:00:45.400 that if you've got oily skin, oftentimes it looks oil 0:00:45.440 --> 0:00:47.640 because actually you have dry skin and that's so it's 0:00:47.640 --> 0:00:50.640 actually not oily. And so sometimes in my t zone, 0:00:50.840 --> 0:00:52.920 especially during the summertime, because I walk so much, that 0:00:53.000 --> 0:00:53.720 my skin will. 0:00:53.600 --> 0:00:55.200 Dry out and it will kind of look oily. 0:00:55.680 --> 0:00:58.680 And I didn't notice how bad it looked until if 0:00:58.680 --> 0:01:00.160 you ever get your lashes done, in your brain, I 0:01:00.200 --> 0:01:02.800 was done, and you're under that fluorescent light and they 0:01:02.800 --> 0:01:04.520 give you the mirror to see and you see your skin. 0:01:04.640 --> 0:01:07.400 Your skin's like I wish they wouldn't, Like, I don't 0:01:07.440 --> 0:01:09.320 want to see my skin after a facial. I don't 0:01:09.319 --> 0:01:11.760 want to see anything. I feel bad for them. 0:01:12.040 --> 0:01:14.120 Girl, but I've been using this bomb. I'm going to 0:01:14.200 --> 0:01:15.720 find the like the name of it. It's like, I 0:01:15.720 --> 0:01:16.000 don't know. 0:01:16.000 --> 0:01:18.440 It's a Korean beauty. It like little and. 0:01:18.520 --> 0:01:20.880 Look like basically it's like a face chapstick. And so 0:01:20.959 --> 0:01:22.640 every night I put it like, you know, like T 0:01:22.840 --> 0:01:23.959 zone girl. 0:01:24.440 --> 0:01:25.120 I just got my arm. 0:01:25.160 --> 0:01:27.800 I was done, obviously, and when they brought me the mirror, 0:01:27.840 --> 0:01:31.200 I said, yes, the. 0:01:31.200 --> 0:01:34.200 Skin was skinning. I said, thank you Korea getting this 0:01:34.240 --> 0:01:34.840 blacker together. 0:01:37.040 --> 0:01:40.920 Aw. But yeah, so I was in Cali for a 0:01:41.000 --> 0:01:45.720 week and a long ago. Yes, it yes, And it 0:01:45.760 --> 0:01:47.680 was that if you guys have been listening, you know, 0:01:47.800 --> 0:01:50.960 I bought a ticket to a conference that I had 0:01:50.960 --> 0:01:53.240 no business being at. It was not for me, but 0:01:53.440 --> 0:01:55.800 I got really excited because I heard the founder speaking 0:01:55.840 --> 0:01:57.560 and I was like, I'm gonna do this. And it 0:01:57.640 --> 0:02:01.480 was like almost three thousand dollars. Okay, it was less 0:02:01.520 --> 0:02:04.240 than my mortgage, but more than my daycare bill each month. 0:02:04.960 --> 0:02:08.639 And then it's all the way in California, right, and anyway, 0:02:08.680 --> 0:02:10.280 the date was getting closer and closer, and I'm like, 0:02:10.320 --> 0:02:12.799 what am I going to do? There's no refunds. So 0:02:13.200 --> 0:02:16.239 I decided I think it was my publisher Krashawn. She said, 0:02:16.240 --> 0:02:18.840 why don't you turn it into a writing retreat, And 0:02:18.960 --> 0:02:21.080 that's exactly what I did. So on the way to 0:02:21.240 --> 0:02:23.960 LA I dropped the boys off in Saint Louis with 0:02:24.000 --> 0:02:27.960 my mama and said bye. And they were there for 0:02:28.040 --> 0:02:30.280 all week, like seven days, and I went on to 0:02:30.360 --> 0:02:40.560 Beverly Hills, Beverly either that or troop Beverly Hills through 0:02:41.120 --> 0:02:43.960 We've seen that trip Beverly Hills. Oh is that like 0:02:44.000 --> 0:02:47.639 a Okay? That's this is when the millennial and Gen 0:02:47.880 --> 0:02:51.799 XX separates us. Oh my god, I got to put 0:02:51.800 --> 0:02:56.160 you on Shelley Long Rest in peace. Okay, but I 0:02:56.480 --> 0:02:59.040 got so lucky. When I tell you, I gave you 0:02:59.040 --> 0:03:01.960 a tour the Airbnb, Tiffany, I would not shut up 0:03:02.360 --> 0:03:05.800 about this Airbnb. I was probably annoying everybody, Like I 0:03:05.840 --> 0:03:10.560 went to the conference one day and like, you know, uh, canodled? No, 0:03:10.760 --> 0:03:14.720 that's what did I do? Schmoozed just like metal with 0:03:14.720 --> 0:03:17.760 a boob, but okay, yeah, yah yah, not no canoodling, 0:03:17.960 --> 0:03:21.480 new canodling, just schmoozing. And the next day I went 0:03:21.520 --> 0:03:24.000 back and everybody was like, how's the Airbnb? And I 0:03:24.040 --> 0:03:25.280 was like, damn, I must have been. 0:03:25.200 --> 0:03:26.000 Talking about. 0:03:27.800 --> 0:03:30.119 The whole time. I was like, Okay, I'll find something 0:03:30.160 --> 0:03:36.200 else to beat my personality today. State farm agents are 0:03:36.280 --> 0:03:39.000 small business owners too, so they know how to help 0:03:39.040 --> 0:03:42.320 you choose personalized policies that fit your needs, like a 0:03:42.320 --> 0:03:44.920 good neighbor. State farm is there. Talk to your local 0:03:44.960 --> 0:03:50.840 agent today. Oh my god. So there's this host in 0:03:50.880 --> 0:03:53.880 Beverly Hills. So she never rents out her guesthouse. Like 0:03:53.960 --> 0:03:56.160 back in the pool in the pool area, there's a 0:03:56.200 --> 0:03:59.320 guest house. And I mean it's basically a little retreat. 0:03:59.360 --> 0:04:02.320 It's just a one bedroom, but I had a bathroom, 0:04:02.360 --> 0:04:04.520 had everything you needed in the doors. The French doors 0:04:04.560 --> 0:04:08.000 opened directly onto the stunning pool. And she had the 0:04:08.040 --> 0:04:11.440 most incredible landscaping for a small yard, just like palm 0:04:11.480 --> 0:04:16.280 trees and banana leaves and complete like twenty foot hedges 0:04:16.360 --> 0:04:20.599 and a jacuzzi and it was all mine. And she 0:04:20.680 --> 0:04:22.880 told me, she was like, maybe I never rent this out. 0:04:23.800 --> 0:04:26.760 She unfortunately had some health issues and during the pandemic 0:04:26.760 --> 0:04:28.640 had to close her business down. So now this is 0:04:28.680 --> 0:04:30.559 like a little way for her to bring in extra money. 0:04:31.320 --> 0:04:33.200 But she was super scared about it because she lives 0:04:33.200 --> 0:04:37.480 by herself and she's in her sixties. Anyway, it just 0:04:37.520 --> 0:04:40.039 so happened that the one day her son was there 0:04:40.200 --> 0:04:43.120 when he was like, Mom, you have a request, and 0:04:43.160 --> 0:04:45.160 she was like, I know, I have been ignoring it. 0:04:45.520 --> 0:04:48.080 And he was like, just she looks nice, go ahead, 0:04:48.279 --> 0:04:51.840 like say yes, and we are pals. 0:04:51.520 --> 0:04:53.560 Now of course you are. 0:04:53.960 --> 0:04:57.719 Yeah, And it was just so special. Oh my god, 0:04:57.800 --> 0:05:01.400 it was so special. I think I'd discover the hack 0:05:01.440 --> 0:05:04.880 of all life hacks for any families, like forget the 0:05:04.880 --> 0:05:08.040 family vacation, just like forget it, pack up the car, 0:05:08.200 --> 0:05:11.080 take the kids places. No, stop it, No, you're doing 0:05:11.120 --> 0:05:15.400 it wrong. This is the thing. You book your own vacation. 0:05:15.720 --> 0:05:18.599 Then you go somewhere by yourself, moms, and then the 0:05:18.680 --> 0:05:22.160 kids you send them together somewhere else like Grandma's house 0:05:22.240 --> 0:05:25.560 or whoever, whatever seems suitable and trustworthy, and then your 0:05:25.640 --> 0:05:27.799 husband gets to stay home and do whatever he wants. 0:05:28.160 --> 0:05:31.160 What you know, what you know is like get I 0:05:31.200 --> 0:05:33.640 came home to two brand new Sono speakers. But you 0:05:33.680 --> 0:05:35.880 know what I mean, I don't want to talk about 0:05:35.920 --> 0:05:41.279 it. It was worth it, because I swear I was so 0:05:41.400 --> 0:05:45.680 happy just being alone with all of my brain. I 0:05:45.800 --> 0:05:49.560 fell in love with myself again. I didn't know I 0:05:49.640 --> 0:05:51.560 was a I didn't know you could do that in 0:05:51.600 --> 0:05:55.280 your thirties, like after two kids. I mean, I like myself, 0:05:55.760 --> 0:05:58.760 but I fell in love with me again. I was 0:05:58.920 --> 0:06:00.839 like I was telling you to when we were talking, 0:06:01.000 --> 0:06:03.880 just I felt exactly how I felt when I was 0:06:03.920 --> 0:06:08.560 twenty two, traveling being like, you know, different different countries 0:06:08.600 --> 0:06:13.720 and meeting new people and it was so much fun. 0:06:13.760 --> 0:06:17.240 And I just remembered how great I am. 0:06:19.640 --> 0:06:24.799 Yes, I like that fun because you are cute. Chatting 0:06:24.800 --> 0:06:26.039 with you, I was like, look at Mannie. First of all, 0:06:26.080 --> 0:06:29.280 that place was gorgeous because you don't have to FaceTime. Yeah, 0:06:29.400 --> 0:06:33.640 the pool was amazing. Mandy looks so happy, and yeah, 0:06:33.720 --> 0:06:36.159 we just were just a key a key ing, okay 0:06:38.000 --> 0:06:41.960 king Yes, And honestly, I'm gonna be like girl the 0:06:42.000 --> 0:06:43.280 next time I go to Cali. 0:06:43.480 --> 0:06:46.520 You know, I'm like with your friend because. 0:06:46.240 --> 0:06:48.960 I know, I was like, Terry, you don't understand. I 0:06:49.440 --> 0:06:52.080 kind of have a podcast and like sometimes when I 0:06:52.120 --> 0:06:54.840 say stuff, more than one person hears it. So if 0:06:54.880 --> 0:06:58.360 I talk about this, she said, I can send anyone 0:06:58.560 --> 0:07:02.320 who I think is wonderful. Oh, she would love you. 0:07:02.720 --> 0:07:04.640 She would love to have more black girls at her 0:07:04.760 --> 0:07:07.440 at her at her Airbnb. I know she would. 0:07:07.960 --> 0:07:08.719 Oh she was so. 0:07:09.279 --> 0:07:11.240 She was one of those white ladies that you just 0:07:12.080 --> 0:07:14.760 you know, I just maybe it's because my mom is white, 0:07:14.760 --> 0:07:17.320 but I just I just loved her. Even though she 0:07:17.400 --> 0:07:20.640 said problematic things. I just forgave her and I moved on. 0:07:20.800 --> 0:07:23.600 And I was like, you know what, like, she's doing 0:07:24.120 --> 0:07:25.960 what she She's doing what she's doing. It's not my 0:07:26.040 --> 0:07:28.760 job to make her do anything different. Nothing. I was 0:07:28.800 --> 0:07:32.400 not in danger. I love to be tokenized when you 0:07:32.520 --> 0:07:35.040 have that exquisite of a backyard. 0:07:35.680 --> 0:07:38.720 And Loki HAIKEI, I mean my daddy saying plopactic. 0:07:38.760 --> 0:07:40.600 I'm like, that's not daddy. 0:07:40.600 --> 0:07:43.560 I'm again, I'm going to talk about some racist immigrants 0:07:44.640 --> 0:07:47.680 like oh my gosh, minority is talking about other minorities. 0:07:47.760 --> 0:07:50.320 I will say this though, he has come a long 0:07:50.520 --> 0:07:52.640 Nigerian way, because you know. 0:07:52.640 --> 0:07:55.000 He used to be like a gay what is that? 0:07:55.760 --> 0:07:58.120 And now the other time he was. 0:07:58.120 --> 0:08:02.200 Like, you know, I hope Allah chooses Pete Buddha check 0:08:03.240 --> 0:08:05.760 and he was like him and his partner Daisy I said, 0:08:05.840 --> 0:08:08.520 not partner from a Nigerian. 0:08:08.520 --> 0:08:12.160 He said diner. Yeah. I was like and he was 0:08:12.160 --> 0:08:13.600 like always was I like him. 0:08:13.960 --> 0:08:16.240 He seemed like a good dad, a good I was like, 0:08:16.240 --> 0:08:18.000 oh my god, you know who really turned him around? 0:08:18.280 --> 0:08:19.000 Rachel Maddow. 0:08:20.120 --> 0:08:22.720 Oh I think you've told us that before. Rachel Maddow. 0:08:22.840 --> 0:08:26.880 Yeah. He was like, I think she's gay. I said nothing, definitely, 0:08:26.920 --> 0:08:27.720 And I could tell he was. 0:08:27.640 --> 0:08:30.960 Struggling with her, like, oh my god, like god, she's 0:08:31.000 --> 0:08:31.480 so smile. 0:08:31.600 --> 0:08:35.000 And then he was like all the things I've been told, 0:08:35.400 --> 0:08:37.000 he said, lie, Because. 0:08:38.559 --> 0:08:40.920 I was like, if Rachel's not going to heaven. 0:08:42.960 --> 0:08:45.600 No, no, Sometimes we got to give parents a little 0:08:45.600 --> 0:08:47.920 grace and facecause group at a time about where things 0:08:47.920 --> 0:08:51.040 were not okay, and you know, and of course, certainly 0:08:51.120 --> 0:08:52.920 you know, I'm not saying we got to excuse all 0:08:52.920 --> 0:08:54.040 the bad behavior. 0:08:53.640 --> 0:08:57.800 But I love you know, we love a turnaround story. 0:08:57.840 --> 0:09:00.640 And so the fact that he said partner, I was like, 0:09:00.840 --> 0:09:04.559 what in the. 0:09:03.520 --> 0:09:06.120 Let me just tell you. Every white person in Beverly 0:09:06.200 --> 0:09:08.760 Hills love to tell me how excited they were about 0:09:08.800 --> 0:09:13.400 Kamala when I they were so proud, including my Airbnb host, 0:09:13.480 --> 0:09:15.640 and she would go to her friend's house and come 0:09:15.679 --> 0:09:21.120 back three sheets to the why just I loved it. 0:09:21.200 --> 0:09:23.439 I just loved her as a character. I just was like, oh, 0:09:23.520 --> 0:09:26.160 you are everything, and she'd be like, we were all 0:09:26.200 --> 0:09:28.920 talking about Kamala and I told her about you know, 0:09:28.960 --> 0:09:31.160 they did the white lady version of the Zoom. 0:09:31.240 --> 0:09:32.400 Yeah, and they did great. 0:09:32.440 --> 0:09:35.800 It was Glennon Doyle, but to be clear, they were 0:09:35.880 --> 0:09:39.960 coached and the words advised by Lovey, a black woman. 0:09:40.200 --> 0:09:41.520 Love you really m hm. 0:09:42.000 --> 0:09:43.360 She a very hard gig. 0:09:43.800 --> 0:09:45.880 Well, she and Glenna are really close. They've been friends 0:09:45.880 --> 0:09:48.319 for a number of years. And so yeah, when Glenn saw, 0:09:48.400 --> 0:09:50.439 because you know, Glenn is a super ally so when 0:09:50.440 --> 0:09:53.520 went in saw you know, the what black women had done, 0:09:53.600 --> 0:09:54.839 she was like, no, we have to stand up and 0:09:54.880 --> 0:09:56.840 do something. They broke Zoom. I think they had one 0:09:56.880 --> 0:10:01.160 hundred and forty fifty fifty thousand women on Doom and 0:10:01.480 --> 0:10:03.120 kindly they were. 0:10:03.160 --> 0:10:03.800 It was incredible. 0:10:03.800 --> 0:10:06.319 They raised about two million dollars on that one call alone. 0:10:06.640 --> 0:10:10.160 And yeah, so I just want to be yes, it 0:10:10.200 --> 0:10:12.440 is and also too, I just want to be I 0:10:12.480 --> 0:10:16.400 love the fact that her name is Joe Cad, Joe Cardie, 0:10:16.480 --> 0:10:18.640 Joe Kate. She's a woman who started the Black Women 0:10:19.360 --> 0:10:22.119 Like Women. You know, I'm gonna say her name incorrectly, 0:10:22.120 --> 0:10:22.880 which I hate. 0:10:24.200 --> 0:10:25.520 Take a breath. Find out the. 0:10:25.559 --> 0:10:28.600 Yeah, I am gonna find Joe j Okay. I feel 0:10:28.640 --> 0:10:29.640 like I'm still gonna say it wrong. 0:10:29.760 --> 0:10:32.199 Even though do the Google thing where it like reads 0:10:32.200 --> 0:10:35.840 the name out oh maybe sucks or LinkedIn also does that. 0:10:35.880 --> 0:10:38.040 Sometimes they will put their name up. I love that. 0:10:38.720 --> 0:10:40.120 Oh, but I don't even know how to no. 0:10:40.200 --> 0:10:45.080 There she is okay so ja oh, Joe Taka, j 0:10:45.360 --> 0:10:46.280 O t. 0:10:46.120 --> 0:10:48.360 A k a Okaya Taka. 0:10:49.000 --> 0:10:49.280 Yes. 0:10:49.720 --> 0:10:52.560 So I met her at first because I had done 0:10:52.559 --> 0:10:53.160 something with own. 0:10:53.200 --> 0:10:54.200 She worked with Oprah a lot. 0:10:54.400 --> 0:10:56.680 I done something with own some of the years back. 0:10:56.880 --> 0:10:59.280 It was like some mini talk show like Black Women 0:10:59.360 --> 0:11:01.480 in Money, and she was the host. So I met 0:11:01.520 --> 0:11:05.000 her there, Joe Taka. She was so nice, edie. And 0:11:05.040 --> 0:11:08.480 then I actually saw her again. Remember I went to 0:11:08.640 --> 0:11:11.280 like it was like the International Women's Day or whatever, 0:11:11.360 --> 0:11:14.880 and they held it at the White House all the time. 0:11:14.920 --> 0:11:16.480 So and so I saw her there. 0:11:16.640 --> 0:11:19.080 She was so great. She was she literally took pictures 0:11:19.120 --> 0:11:20.760 of me. She's like, sit on this couch. 0:11:20.760 --> 0:11:23.600 He asked, girl, yes, and so was her m hm, 0:11:23.840 --> 0:11:24.439 so nice. 0:11:25.320 --> 0:11:27.559 And so when I saw that, it was she behind 0:11:27.679 --> 0:11:30.360 kind of like this movement so black women. If I'm 0:11:30.360 --> 0:11:33.600 being candid, I know so many of us heard that 0:11:33.720 --> 0:11:36.640 the current president, Joe Biden, president of Minden, was not 0:11:36.679 --> 0:11:40.200 going to seek re election and nomination. That we were like, 0:11:40.240 --> 0:11:42.440 and he said, you know, I'm throwing my weight behind Kamala. 0:11:42.760 --> 0:11:43.839 I think all of us were like. 0:11:44.400 --> 0:11:48.080 Oh my god, like that would be great, but America 0:11:49.200 --> 0:11:51.960 not America, if you will. 0:11:52.080 --> 0:11:55.120 So I think we're all nervous, like I guess not 0:11:55.200 --> 0:11:57.800 because of her qualifications, but more so. 0:11:58.600 --> 0:12:00.679 Like I don't know, will vote for her? 0:12:00.760 --> 0:12:01.120 Yeah? 0:12:01.200 --> 0:12:04.360 Yes, And then you know, Jotaka was like, girl, we 0:12:04.720 --> 0:12:05.720 are about to do that. 0:12:05.720 --> 0:12:08.800 That same boom, she said black women. She set the 0:12:08.840 --> 0:12:11.240 tone and since then, I've seen white women for Kamala. 0:12:11.440 --> 0:12:14.800 I sawt like there's a there was this, uh, I 0:12:14.800 --> 0:12:19.640 guess wherever Trump has something in Florida, like whatever neighborhood 0:12:19.640 --> 0:12:23.160 they mark, So they did a golf a golf cart 0:12:23.720 --> 0:12:26.200 like like in that area for Kamala. 0:12:26.080 --> 0:12:28.679 Oh my god, I love that troll him within an 0:12:28.679 --> 0:12:30.520 interest of life America. 0:12:30.280 --> 0:12:34.520 I mean, and all these uber wealthy older white Americans 0:12:34.559 --> 0:12:35.880 that you would think, no way, they're all going to 0:12:35.920 --> 0:12:39.880 vote for no. And so yeah, it has been you know, 0:12:40.080 --> 0:12:43.440 like amazing and so low key high key. When I 0:12:43.480 --> 0:12:46.920 went to the Vice President's residence. Like a member of 0:12:46.920 --> 0:12:49.400 her staff was like, oh, this is before it was announced, 0:12:49.720 --> 0:12:51.480 and I don't know that even she knew, but anyway, 0:12:51.520 --> 0:12:53.920 they had asked she's on an economic empowerment tour I 0:12:53.920 --> 0:12:57.000 think an economic compairment tour, and they were like, Tipicanly, 0:12:57.000 --> 0:12:58.400 we'd love for you to join her on tour. 0:12:58.559 --> 0:13:01.840 I was like what, And. 0:13:03.480 --> 0:13:05.719 You know, I was like, okay, But you know, now 0:13:05.720 --> 0:13:07.280 with all these changes, I don't know what that means 0:13:07.320 --> 0:13:10.560 about being candid because we can all see, like because 0:13:10.600 --> 0:13:13.040 now it's more than an economic empowerment tour and so 0:13:13.080 --> 0:13:14.440 I don't know what it all would look like or 0:13:14.440 --> 0:13:17.360 even that offers to open I'm certainly talking behind the scenes, 0:13:17.360 --> 0:13:19.600 so you might see your girl on tour with. 0:13:19.600 --> 0:13:21.240 The first you told you. When you told me that 0:13:21.280 --> 0:13:23.640 news the first time, I was like, thank God, it's you. 0:13:24.280 --> 0:13:26.320 Like I think they're doing the right thing when they're 0:13:26.320 --> 0:13:29.840 reaching out to you to be yeah, to be a 0:13:29.880 --> 0:13:33.480 conduit for that message, and I'm so happy for you. 0:13:33.840 --> 0:13:35.640 So, like I said, we'll see because we have you know, 0:13:35.679 --> 0:13:37.280 like it's it's still up in the air because of 0:13:37.320 --> 0:13:37.880 all that's happened. 0:13:37.920 --> 0:13:40.000 That's when I spoken to you know, her office. 0:13:40.040 --> 0:13:42.559 They were like, oh, as you can imagine, it's a 0:13:42.559 --> 0:13:45.520 little scrambly over here, but let's connect this week and 0:13:45.559 --> 0:13:48.240 see like what that might look like. And so I said, girl, 0:13:48.280 --> 0:13:51.040 just let me know, tag me in and like, can 0:13:51.040 --> 0:13:54.200 you imagine when she wins the presidency, I will have 0:13:54.200 --> 0:13:55.839 a video of the President of the United States talking 0:13:55.840 --> 0:13:58.400 about talking hey mommy to my mom. 0:13:58.440 --> 0:14:02.720 Girl, my mother. Their first black president, not just I 0:14:02.720 --> 0:14:06.080 mean sorry, the first black female president and South Asian president. 0:14:08.000 --> 0:14:09.439 My mom is gonna be like, you're not gonna be 0:14:09.440 --> 0:14:12.240 able to tell Sylvia Oli not a damn thing. 0:14:12.520 --> 0:14:17.480 Okay, Yeah, oh my god, I'm so ready And ba 0:14:17.600 --> 0:14:20.920 fam where I told y'all before we even knew about Kamala, 0:14:20.960 --> 0:14:23.120 I said, I'm choosing hope, I'm choosing optimism, and I'm 0:14:23.160 --> 0:14:25.520 lining up all these great guests. We're gonna have the 0:14:25.560 --> 0:14:29.200 most incredible fun time. We're gonna have an actual fun 0:14:29.280 --> 0:14:32.320 time talking about the election and all the issues that 0:14:32.360 --> 0:14:34.280 matter to black women. I cannot wait. 0:14:35.440 --> 0:14:37.600 It's kind of like a special Yeah, we're not gonna say. 0:14:37.600 --> 0:14:40.920 We can't say, but I think there's three guests who 0:14:40.960 --> 0:14:43.560 I have been dying to have on the show and 0:14:43.640 --> 0:14:48.360 I am so excited. So get ready it's all gonna 0:14:48.360 --> 0:14:51.920 start in September October, the Road to twenty twenty four. 0:14:52.240 --> 0:14:56.760 Yeah, uh huh, but no, cydbar you told me something 0:14:56.840 --> 0:14:59.040 not to be in all your business, which you had 0:14:59.080 --> 0:15:02.560 to say is something you were at this conference that 0:15:02.760 --> 0:15:05.040 you realize something about yourself. 0:15:04.680 --> 0:15:08.520 That attributed to your ability to like be a really 0:15:08.560 --> 0:15:10.840 good negotiator. And it's it's not something that people would 0:15:10.840 --> 0:15:12.760 think do you want to say? It was like, you know, 0:15:12.800 --> 0:15:15.560 it's a two personal don't take it personal. 0:15:17.800 --> 0:15:20.400 I have been I am dying to share it with 0:15:20.440 --> 0:15:23.000 you and shake and thank you to Chris Brown of 0:15:23.040 --> 0:15:26.720 Popcorn Finance, my new brother from another mother, brother from 0:15:26.760 --> 0:15:31.040 another mother, because he was the first audience. I worked 0:15:31.040 --> 0:15:34.560 out this, like, uh, this train of thought on while 0:15:34.600 --> 0:15:37.120 we were hiking in the canyons, like you know, trying 0:15:37.120 --> 0:15:41.720 to be cool in California and dying from heat stroke. 0:15:43.320 --> 0:15:48.160 And so I get so butterfly when I when I 0:15:48.200 --> 0:15:51.800 say this, Okay, so I realized why I am so 0:15:52.120 --> 0:15:54.680 effing good at what I do? And you know, Chris 0:15:54.760 --> 0:15:56.120 was like, so where do you think that comes from? 0:15:56.200 --> 0:15:58.120 I've been asked before, like how do you negotiate. I 0:15:58.160 --> 0:16:00.280 was telling him all these tips. He's like, I got 0:16:00.280 --> 0:16:02.000 this agent and he told me one of the deals 0:16:02.000 --> 0:16:05.080 the agent got and I was like, please, here's what 0:16:05.080 --> 0:16:07.080 I would ask for. And he's like, where does that 0:16:07.080 --> 0:16:09.240 come from? And then I was like starting to back 0:16:09.280 --> 0:16:13.200 up to the day before we hung out. I had 0:16:13.720 --> 0:16:15.760 invited I had looked up an old friend from the 0:16:16.000 --> 0:16:18.360 from in the area who was who I met in 0:16:18.400 --> 0:16:23.920 journalism years ago, like full disclosure and husband knows this. 0:16:23.960 --> 0:16:25.440 I used to have a crush on this guy, like 0:16:25.560 --> 0:16:28.080 way back when I was like eighteen or whenever I 0:16:28.160 --> 0:16:31.520 was how old am I now? Twenty years ago? But anyway, 0:16:31.800 --> 0:16:34.480 found out that he had been like really sick just 0:16:34.520 --> 0:16:36.720 generally wanted to like reconnect, and we hung out and 0:16:36.760 --> 0:16:41.480 I was like, oh, I still have a crum crush. 0:16:41.680 --> 0:16:44.640 Two thousand and eight is calling. They say you still 0:16:44.640 --> 0:16:46.720 got a crush, and I was like, oh my god, 0:16:46.760 --> 0:16:51.680 I'm not dead. But also I'm like, I'm a married 0:16:51.720 --> 0:16:55.760 woman and I love my husband, so no, so what 0:16:55.920 --> 0:16:59.000 did I decide to do. Most people, I realized, would 0:16:59.080 --> 0:17:03.280 just would just like, I don't know, stop hanging out 0:17:03.280 --> 0:17:04.920 with them and just you know. But then like that 0:17:05.040 --> 0:17:09.919 never like whatever. I decided to tell him why I 0:17:09.960 --> 0:17:11.800 didn't want to hang out. The next day, I was like, 0:17:12.640 --> 0:17:14.280 and I was, and I was just like, hey, I 0:17:14.320 --> 0:17:18.640 gotta be honest. Kind of have a crush on you. 0:17:18.680 --> 0:17:22.679 I realize that's not okay. You got a girlfriend, I 0:17:22.720 --> 0:17:24.679 have a husband and two children, but like, you know, 0:17:24.800 --> 0:17:26.639 let's just be honest. We talked about how life was 0:17:26.680 --> 0:17:28.239 too short, and I was like, I'm just letting you know, 0:17:28.560 --> 0:17:31.360 canceling your invite for tomorrow at the pool, like you're 0:17:31.359 --> 0:17:36.280 not coming, have a good life. And I sent it 0:17:36.960 --> 0:17:39.480 and I was so like, this is the part of 0:17:39.520 --> 0:17:42.119 me that felt like, oh my god, I still got it, 0:17:42.160 --> 0:17:45.920 Like I'm still that bold just do the scary thing, 0:17:46.440 --> 0:17:49.520 jump off a cliff, but make it a personal conversation 0:17:49.680 --> 0:17:53.679 instead of an actual cliff kind of girl. And I 0:17:53.720 --> 0:17:57.840 was telling Chris about this and he was dying, you guys, Chris, 0:17:58.400 --> 0:18:01.159 if you've ever seen a person just folden on themselves 0:18:01.200 --> 0:18:04.800 like he was a sheet of paper, And me telling 0:18:04.840 --> 0:18:07.560 him what I told my friend, He was like, why 0:18:07.600 --> 0:18:13.120 did you do that? And he was so deeply uncomfortable 0:18:13.119 --> 0:18:16.879 with it, and I realized, like that's my adrenaline high. 0:18:16.920 --> 0:18:21.359 I love it. Love. I love saying something out loud 0:18:21.640 --> 0:18:24.879 that nobody expects, like at a one to one. So 0:18:25.640 --> 0:18:27.639 and that was not my first time. I was like, 0:18:28.200 --> 0:18:30.680 I'm having a memory now when I was fifteen years old, 0:18:30.720 --> 0:18:33.719 Like I had been telling boys I like them just 0:18:33.760 --> 0:18:35.199 for the hell of it, for the thrill of it, 0:18:35.359 --> 0:18:38.720 and asking them on dates since I was fifteen. And 0:18:39.119 --> 0:18:42.560 this is the first time I publicly admitted this. But yeah, 0:18:42.560 --> 0:18:45.440 when I was fifteen, there's a boy on the bus, 0:18:45.280 --> 0:18:48.080 as there are and I just fell in love with 0:18:48.080 --> 0:18:50.000 the back of his head. I thought he was so cute. 0:18:51.400 --> 0:18:53.600 I was brand new to the school and I don't know, 0:18:53.720 --> 0:18:56.680 being new to the school, I felt like, nobody knows 0:18:56.680 --> 0:19:00.040 you like reinvent yourself. Ask a boy out fifteen. I 0:19:00.119 --> 0:19:02.800 don't know. I think I watched too much Oprah after school, 0:19:02.920 --> 0:19:06.160 but something. So, how do you feel in your body 0:19:06.240 --> 0:19:07.920 right now, Tiffany, are you feeling. 0:19:08.040 --> 0:19:11.960 I am yes, because you know me, I'm literally the 0:19:12.000 --> 0:19:12.760 exact opposite. 0:19:12.840 --> 0:19:14.840 So I am this terrified, scary. 0:19:14.880 --> 0:19:16.600 Remember I told you what have Pinatier Dreiell passed away 0:19:16.600 --> 0:19:19.280 because he was like my magic mirror on the wall 0:19:19.400 --> 0:19:20.879 was like, girl, the reflection. 0:19:20.600 --> 0:19:23.639 Is always what big unipo and then without Darrell hair 0:19:23.760 --> 0:19:25.480 was like, who don't know how I look? 0:19:25.800 --> 0:19:28.320 And I was feeling very n hinged, and dating and 0:19:28.359 --> 0:19:30.879 all the things was so stressful. I thought I was 0:19:30.880 --> 0:19:33.840 going to have like many panic attacks, which I did. 0:19:33.880 --> 0:19:37.520 So you saying this is so the antithesis, Like I 0:19:37.560 --> 0:19:40.679 admire this so much because I could, like a man 0:19:40.720 --> 0:19:44.639 would have to tell me, hey, I really like you 0:19:44.720 --> 0:19:45.840 and find you really attractive. 0:19:46.040 --> 0:19:47.840