1 00:00:00,120 --> 00:00:02,560 Speaker 1: Hey, folks, it's Lyle. Before we get into the episode, 2 00:00:02,640 --> 00:00:04,440 Speaker 1: I wanted to talk to you guys about a new 3 00:00:04,519 --> 00:00:07,880 Speaker 1: thing I'm doing where you can help support my lizard 4 00:00:08,119 --> 00:00:12,680 Speaker 1: endeavors by becoming a premium member of this podcast over 5 00:00:12,720 --> 00:00:17,400 Speaker 1: at Therapy Gecko dot supercast dot com. Premium members, or 6 00:00:17,600 --> 00:00:20,479 Speaker 1: gek Legends as I call them, we'll be able to 7 00:00:20,480 --> 00:00:24,360 Speaker 1: get every new and existing episode of Therapy Gecko completely 8 00:00:24,440 --> 00:00:27,720 Speaker 1: ad free. 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All right, let's get into 18 00:00:59,520 --> 00:00:59,960 Speaker 1: the episode. 19 00:01:00,840 --> 00:01:02,320 Speaker 2: Hello, Hey, what's up Love? 20 00:01:02,400 --> 00:01:04,040 Speaker 1: How's it going? Is this Will this? 21 00:01:04,160 --> 00:01:04,600 Speaker 2: As well? 22 00:01:05,600 --> 00:01:08,360 Speaker 1: What is happening in the universe? 23 00:01:08,400 --> 00:01:13,200 Speaker 2: Will Man? There's so many things happening, so many things happening, 24 00:01:13,240 --> 00:01:19,959 Speaker 2: and I have a big dilemma, which is do I 25 00:01:20,000 --> 00:01:22,640 Speaker 2: talk to you about the life I had more the 26 00:01:22,720 --> 00:01:23,640 Speaker 2: one I have now? 27 00:01:25,319 --> 00:01:26,960 Speaker 1: Well, I mean, why don't you tell me a little 28 00:01:27,000 --> 00:01:28,959 Speaker 1: bit about both if you if you want, of. 29 00:01:28,880 --> 00:01:41,320 Speaker 2: Course, yeah, for sure. So let's see. I guess the 30 00:01:41,640 --> 00:01:47,000 Speaker 2: most interesting part of my past is when I literally 31 00:01:47,200 --> 00:01:48,760 Speaker 2: ran away with the circus. 32 00:01:50,360 --> 00:01:51,080 Speaker 1: How old are you in that? 33 00:01:53,440 --> 00:02:00,320 Speaker 2: I was nineteen And just to preface this really quick, 34 00:02:01,800 --> 00:02:06,320 Speaker 2: what happened was my dad had died a few years earlier. 35 00:02:06,760 --> 00:02:15,320 Speaker 2: This is back in ninety eight, ninety nine, and my 36 00:02:15,360 --> 00:02:19,160 Speaker 2: mom had remarried some guy really quickly, you know, like 37 00:02:19,200 --> 00:02:22,640 Speaker 2: some blasphem passed. And I was nineteen years old, still 38 00:02:22,639 --> 00:02:27,560 Speaker 2: living at home my little brother, and just started button 39 00:02:27,600 --> 00:02:31,680 Speaker 2: heads with the new husband, and they just wanted me gone. 40 00:02:32,320 --> 00:02:35,280 Speaker 2: And I was between jobs, and I was opening up 41 00:02:35,280 --> 00:02:39,200 Speaker 2: the classifieds one day, you know, the old the old 42 00:02:39,240 --> 00:02:41,919 Speaker 2: way in which we used to do with actual newspapers. 43 00:02:42,040 --> 00:02:46,000 Speaker 2: And I want to say, there was a good quarter 44 00:02:46,120 --> 00:02:51,600 Speaker 2: page ad for the Ringling Brothers in Garden my Bailey Circus, 45 00:02:51,680 --> 00:02:56,560 Speaker 2: and I was like, what the hell is this? And 46 00:02:56,600 --> 00:03:01,360 Speaker 2: it had all kinds of jobs, you know, like animal handlers, 47 00:03:01,880 --> 00:03:05,840 Speaker 2: you know, veterinarians, you know, uh just on and on on, 48 00:03:06,639 --> 00:03:10,080 Speaker 2: but uh you know, and and uh my mom and 49 00:03:10,440 --> 00:03:12,760 Speaker 2: knew the husband walked in and I was like, guys, 50 00:03:12,960 --> 00:03:14,600 Speaker 2: what the hell is this? You have to look at this, 51 00:03:15,280 --> 00:03:17,160 Speaker 2: and you know, we had like a laugh for like 52 00:03:18,240 --> 00:03:22,000 Speaker 2: ten seconds, right, but then they were like, well maybe 53 00:03:22,040 --> 00:03:25,720 Speaker 2: you should do it. And I was like like what 54 00:03:25,800 --> 00:03:28,640 Speaker 2: are you talking about? You know, like are you insane? 55 00:03:29,360 --> 00:03:33,480 Speaker 2: And I mean more or less, I'll just give you 56 00:03:33,520 --> 00:03:35,920 Speaker 2: the quick version. I mean, they just wanted me gone, 57 00:03:36,000 --> 00:03:41,400 Speaker 2: like I said, and I very shortly, you know, for 58 00:03:41,520 --> 00:03:44,400 Speaker 2: lack of other options and what to do you know 59 00:03:44,480 --> 00:03:48,960 Speaker 2: in life, even just went down there to see what 60 00:03:49,040 --> 00:03:51,360 Speaker 2: was going on and I got hired right away and 61 00:03:51,400 --> 00:03:54,680 Speaker 2: within a couple of days I was gone and on 62 00:03:54,760 --> 00:04:01,720 Speaker 2: the road. So yeah, I linked up with the legit 63 00:04:02,000 --> 00:04:06,400 Speaker 2: Ringling Brothers Barnum and Valley Circus for about a year. Actually, 64 00:04:06,440 --> 00:04:08,040 Speaker 2: I think it was a year to the date I 65 00:04:08,120 --> 00:04:08,840 Speaker 2: was with them. 66 00:04:09,800 --> 00:04:14,040 Speaker 1: M hm. And what was that time like for you? 67 00:04:18,360 --> 00:04:24,279 Speaker 2: It started off very just like wow, man, I'm doing 68 00:04:24,360 --> 00:04:27,800 Speaker 2: something really wild. This is something you know, once in 69 00:04:27,800 --> 00:04:31,599 Speaker 2: a lifetime maybe not even that you know chance, you know, 70 00:04:31,680 --> 00:04:35,479 Speaker 2: to actually do something crazy like this. But I thought 71 00:04:35,560 --> 00:04:37,760 Speaker 2: as just a way to travel a lot, you know, 72 00:04:37,800 --> 00:04:41,600 Speaker 2: and to see different things. But so it started off 73 00:04:42,200 --> 00:04:44,359 Speaker 2: very much, you know, like oh this is a new adventure, 74 00:04:46,279 --> 00:04:51,680 Speaker 2: you know, meeting crazy people doing crazy things. But you know, 75 00:04:53,560 --> 00:04:58,520 Speaker 2: as time went by, you know, being completely isolated, living 76 00:04:58,520 --> 00:05:02,840 Speaker 2: on a train, working eighty hours hard labor, you know, 77 00:05:02,920 --> 00:05:07,880 Speaker 2: every almost every day, you know, it just really got 78 00:05:07,920 --> 00:05:11,680 Speaker 2: to me. So, you know, I want to say close 79 00:05:11,720 --> 00:05:14,279 Speaker 2: within you know, a month or two before I actually left, 80 00:05:14,320 --> 00:05:20,640 Speaker 2: I was in a really bad statement depression. And you know, 81 00:05:20,720 --> 00:05:22,719 Speaker 2: it's very hard to sleep on a train, you know, 82 00:05:22,800 --> 00:05:25,800 Speaker 2: even when it's at a standstill, because things are always 83 00:05:25,839 --> 00:05:28,640 Speaker 2: bumping the damn train, you know, and all the train 84 00:05:28,720 --> 00:05:31,200 Speaker 2: cars are going boom boom, boom boom, you know and 85 00:05:31,360 --> 00:05:34,279 Speaker 2: moving around all the time. It's it's very hard to sleep. 86 00:05:34,360 --> 00:05:37,919 Speaker 2: So you know, it was it was hard. It was 87 00:05:38,040 --> 00:05:40,800 Speaker 2: really really hard. You know, I'm glad I did it, 88 00:05:40,839 --> 00:05:45,560 Speaker 2: but it was you know, it was not fun. 89 00:05:47,080 --> 00:05:49,040 Speaker 1: And how long did you say total? You were doing 90 00:05:49,080 --> 00:05:49,360 Speaker 1: that for. 91 00:05:51,839 --> 00:05:54,880 Speaker 2: One year to the date, one year? 92 00:05:55,760 --> 00:05:58,479 Speaker 1: And what did you do when you got out? And 93 00:05:58,560 --> 00:06:01,039 Speaker 1: you were about how old then? As well? 94 00:06:02,680 --> 00:06:09,520 Speaker 2: I was twenty one when I got out. Okay, yeah, 95 00:06:10,400 --> 00:06:13,680 Speaker 2: so I was well asking myself, I'm like, well, how 96 00:06:13,680 --> 00:06:19,640 Speaker 2: do I translate like these like skills, which was basically 97 00:06:19,720 --> 00:06:27,400 Speaker 2: setting up a whole production, you know, running props, running cables, rigging, 98 00:06:27,720 --> 00:06:29,640 Speaker 2: you know, sitting up the trusting and like, well, how 99 00:06:29,680 --> 00:06:32,520 Speaker 2: does this How does this apply to my next thing? 100 00:06:33,000 --> 00:06:34,800 Speaker 2: You know, And like, I don't know how this is 101 00:06:34,839 --> 00:06:37,760 Speaker 2: going to work out, but it did. And I actually 102 00:06:37,800 --> 00:06:43,279 Speaker 2: got a job. Since I live in SoCal, I got 103 00:06:43,279 --> 00:06:47,440 Speaker 2: a job with a lighting company that does stage lighting 104 00:06:47,680 --> 00:06:53,279 Speaker 2: and mostly in the music industry. So yeah, after I 105 00:06:53,360 --> 00:06:57,040 Speaker 2: left that, I basically became a roadie and I traveled 106 00:06:57,040 --> 00:06:59,800 Speaker 2: with a bunch of bands and did a lot of 107 00:06:59,800 --> 00:07:02,680 Speaker 2: cool stuff for I don't want to say another three 108 00:07:02,760 --> 00:07:03,479 Speaker 2: years after that. 109 00:07:05,760 --> 00:07:09,240 Speaker 1: M And so you say that there's a there's a 110 00:07:09,400 --> 00:07:13,960 Speaker 1: strong dichotomy between your life then and your life now 111 00:07:14,680 --> 00:07:17,280 Speaker 1: because you you came in here asking which one you 112 00:07:17,320 --> 00:07:19,640 Speaker 1: should tell me about. What do you think are those 113 00:07:19,680 --> 00:07:20,960 Speaker 1: big differences? 114 00:07:25,760 --> 00:07:31,280 Speaker 2: Well, I'm like, honestly, I'm definitely back in like a 115 00:07:31,320 --> 00:07:37,160 Speaker 2: depressive state just because of the way things have gone, 116 00:07:37,640 --> 00:07:41,960 Speaker 2: you know. I uh, I like had these incredibly adventurous 117 00:07:42,000 --> 00:07:45,760 Speaker 2: jobs when I was young, in my twenties, you know, 118 00:07:45,840 --> 00:07:50,400 Speaker 2: and then you know, got married and then was trying 119 00:07:50,440 --> 00:07:51,800 Speaker 2: to figure out, Okay, well what do I do with 120 00:07:51,840 --> 00:07:54,520 Speaker 2: the rest of my life now? Because she was not 121 00:07:55,280 --> 00:08:00,280 Speaker 2: loving this whole like road life thing. So I did, 122 00:08:00,320 --> 00:08:01,680 Speaker 2: like what I was supposed to do, Like I went 123 00:08:01,680 --> 00:08:06,040 Speaker 2: to college, got a bunch of bloring office jobs, you know, 124 00:08:09,840 --> 00:08:13,480 Speaker 2: and completely forsake like, you know, my god given talents 125 00:08:13,520 --> 00:08:17,040 Speaker 2: and just did you know what we're told to do 126 00:08:17,160 --> 00:08:19,960 Speaker 2: is you know, adults, it's just like, you know, go 127 00:08:20,080 --> 00:08:22,640 Speaker 2: for money, you know, and just try and let the 128 00:08:22,800 --> 00:08:26,320 Speaker 2: you know, American dream and all that. So long story short, 129 00:08:26,480 --> 00:08:30,760 Speaker 2: you know, I had a divorce a couple of years 130 00:08:30,800 --> 00:08:33,600 Speaker 2: back and lost everything you know that I had worked 131 00:08:34,280 --> 00:08:37,720 Speaker 2: you know, twenty years for you know, the home you know, 132 00:08:37,800 --> 00:08:44,360 Speaker 2: and then everything else. So I am back kind of 133 00:08:44,440 --> 00:08:47,320 Speaker 2: like square one, you know, and it's a weird place 134 00:08:47,360 --> 00:08:50,520 Speaker 2: to be at forty four. It's a really weird place. 135 00:08:50,559 --> 00:08:55,000 Speaker 2: And especially in the year twenty twenty three, you know, 136 00:08:55,080 --> 00:09:00,960 Speaker 2: it's like things have changed a lot. So that's where 137 00:09:00,960 --> 00:09:01,800 Speaker 2: I'm at right now. 138 00:09:02,200 --> 00:09:04,560 Speaker 1: So how when when did you say this divorce. 139 00:09:04,360 --> 00:09:10,080 Speaker 2: Was uh twenty one, twenty twenty. 140 00:09:09,760 --> 00:09:14,400 Speaker 1: One, And in the past two years have you been 141 00:09:14,679 --> 00:09:17,080 Speaker 1: out there trying to date anyone or do anything like that. 142 00:09:19,280 --> 00:09:25,120 Speaker 2: Yeah, actually that's kind of where my therapy needs is 143 00:09:25,200 --> 00:09:32,600 Speaker 2: right now. I yes, I definitely dated a string of women, 144 00:09:34,600 --> 00:09:38,200 Speaker 2: got back out there and just quickly learned, you know, 145 00:09:38,320 --> 00:09:43,080 Speaker 2: like the whole games people play these days, and like 146 00:09:43,640 --> 00:09:46,880 Speaker 2: the lifestyles of people live these days, and I just 147 00:09:46,920 --> 00:09:50,640 Speaker 2: feel like a relicive. I feel like, yeah, go. 148 00:09:50,640 --> 00:09:52,360 Speaker 1: Into that for me real quick. The games that it 149 00:09:52,400 --> 00:09:54,600 Speaker 1: will play and the lifestyles. What do you tell me, 150 00:09:54,920 --> 00:09:56,719 Speaker 1: because I assume what you mean is you're on the 151 00:09:56,800 --> 00:09:59,400 Speaker 1: dating apps and you're seeing some stuff that makes you 152 00:09:59,440 --> 00:10:02,720 Speaker 1: feel like I mean, people have been calling into this 153 00:10:02,760 --> 00:10:07,800 Speaker 1: show talking about polyamory and uh, you know, booming dogs 154 00:10:07,840 --> 00:10:11,360 Speaker 1: and sex dungeons and all sorts of things where I'm like, yeah, 155 00:10:11,400 --> 00:10:15,200 Speaker 1: I could see if I were you, you know, getting 156 00:10:15,240 --> 00:10:17,640 Speaker 1: back out there being feeling like you were a relic 157 00:10:17,720 --> 00:10:20,080 Speaker 1: of the past. But from your perspective, what what have 158 00:10:20,160 --> 00:10:21,720 Speaker 1: you seen that has made you feel that way? 159 00:10:25,679 --> 00:10:28,000 Speaker 2: Like the first thing on top of my head is 160 00:10:28,040 --> 00:10:34,720 Speaker 2: just the shallowness of people these days. The you know, 161 00:10:36,360 --> 00:10:40,200 Speaker 2: like I was brought up where like, you know, you 162 00:10:40,280 --> 00:10:45,800 Speaker 2: would pick a girl up on a day, you know, uh, 163 00:10:46,400 --> 00:10:49,880 Speaker 2: you know, take her out, you know, kiss at the 164 00:10:49,960 --> 00:10:52,040 Speaker 2: end of the night and then you know, you know, 165 00:10:52,080 --> 00:10:54,520 Speaker 2: you might sleep together after three days or something like that. 166 00:10:54,960 --> 00:11:00,080 Speaker 2: Like that was, you know, the the ftatus quo. So 167 00:11:00,280 --> 00:11:02,080 Speaker 2: these days, I mean, people are giving it out on 168 00:11:02,080 --> 00:11:06,000 Speaker 2: the first date and saying but they want a long 169 00:11:06,080 --> 00:11:11,080 Speaker 2: term relationship, and it just seems like people are really 170 00:11:11,080 --> 00:11:13,800 Speaker 2: confused about what they actually want, you know, and. 171 00:11:14,400 --> 00:11:16,880 Speaker 1: Let me ask well, let me ask you this first. 172 00:11:16,880 --> 00:11:18,840 Speaker 1: Are you on the are you on Tinder? What are 173 00:11:18,840 --> 00:11:19,360 Speaker 1: you on. 174 00:11:21,000 --> 00:11:24,160 Speaker 2: I have honestly, I've used all the apps at one point. 175 00:11:24,880 --> 00:11:26,920 Speaker 1: When you're on the apps? What age range are you? 176 00:11:26,960 --> 00:11:27,880 Speaker 1: Are you looking at here? 177 00:11:30,640 --> 00:11:33,080 Speaker 2: I have done I want to say thirty to forty 178 00:11:33,080 --> 00:11:36,040 Speaker 2: four or maybe forty five. Even so, I mean I 179 00:11:36,040 --> 00:11:38,640 Speaker 2: would I wouldn't mind dating someone one or two years 180 00:11:38,640 --> 00:11:40,319 Speaker 2: older than me. That's fine, It's not a big deal 181 00:11:40,360 --> 00:11:41,400 Speaker 2: of my age, okay. 182 00:11:41,400 --> 00:11:47,880 Speaker 1: Right, all right? And so you're you're hmmm, and so 183 00:11:48,040 --> 00:11:52,120 Speaker 1: you're feeling is there's a lot of shallowness. How many 184 00:11:52,200 --> 00:11:56,480 Speaker 1: people have you actually like? Were you able to actually 185 00:11:56,480 --> 00:11:57,920 Speaker 1: go on dates with anybody? 186 00:11:59,559 --> 00:12:04,520 Speaker 2: Oh? Yeah, yeah, I've dated quite a few, probably at 187 00:12:04,600 --> 00:12:05,080 Speaker 2: least eight. 188 00:12:11,080 --> 00:12:13,719 Speaker 1: You're on eight dates between uh now and when you 189 00:12:13,800 --> 00:12:14,400 Speaker 1: got divorced. 190 00:12:15,760 --> 00:12:19,360 Speaker 3: Yeah, I've dated probably they know what very was there 191 00:12:19,920 --> 00:12:23,280 Speaker 3: was there a common theme as to why none of 192 00:12:23,280 --> 00:12:28,200 Speaker 3: those worked out for you. 193 00:12:28,280 --> 00:12:37,200 Speaker 2: Basically, like what I've been seeing is people are out 194 00:12:37,200 --> 00:12:40,160 Speaker 2: there saying, oh, they want to meet their partner, you know, 195 00:12:40,200 --> 00:12:42,920 Speaker 2: they want to they want you know, their soulmate, they 196 00:12:42,960 --> 00:12:51,800 Speaker 2: want the long term relationship. And then you, you know, 197 00:12:51,880 --> 00:12:54,200 Speaker 2: you're you're telling them, okay, well you want the same things. 198 00:12:54,320 --> 00:12:57,600 Speaker 2: So we're on the same page, right, Spend a week 199 00:12:57,720 --> 00:13:01,920 Speaker 2: or two talking to these people, finding out everything about them, 200 00:13:02,000 --> 00:13:05,240 Speaker 2: they find everything about you. It's exhausting. And then you 201 00:13:05,320 --> 00:13:08,360 Speaker 2: meet up and then you go on several dates and 202 00:13:08,360 --> 00:13:13,560 Speaker 2: then they're just like, well, you know, you know, maybe 203 00:13:13,559 --> 00:13:15,760 Speaker 2: I don't want to be in a relationship right now. 204 00:13:15,840 --> 00:13:18,800 Speaker 2: So you're like, what was that all about? Like why 205 00:13:18,800 --> 00:13:21,280 Speaker 2: did I just waste all this time and energy? And 206 00:13:21,520 --> 00:13:23,640 Speaker 2: I'm telling you it's happened over and over and over 207 00:13:23,640 --> 00:13:27,160 Speaker 2: and over again. But I didn't meet. Unfortunately, one girl 208 00:13:28,400 --> 00:13:36,800 Speaker 2: that I fell in love with, and unfortunately she's a 209 00:13:36,840 --> 00:13:38,880 Speaker 2: textbook narcissist. 210 00:13:39,840 --> 00:13:41,080 Speaker 1: Now what makes you say that? 211 00:13:42,880 --> 00:13:45,640 Speaker 2: Uh, okay, well this isn't just a girl and she's 212 00:13:45,720 --> 00:13:48,640 Speaker 2: my own age. By the way, She isn't just somebody 213 00:13:48,640 --> 00:13:50,640 Speaker 2: that takes a lot of selfies and is like, oh, 214 00:13:50,679 --> 00:13:53,200 Speaker 2: I look so pretty. She's not bad looking, but you 215 00:13:53,240 --> 00:13:55,800 Speaker 2: know it's a little overboard, you know. 216 00:13:55,880 --> 00:13:58,760 Speaker 1: Okay, But. 217 00:14:01,320 --> 00:14:05,160 Speaker 2: What makes me say that is she seems to keep 218 00:14:05,160 --> 00:14:09,240 Speaker 2: a lot of secrets. It's never completely forthcoming, you know. 219 00:14:09,280 --> 00:14:11,680 Speaker 2: And I've asked her straight up, would you be my girlfriend? 220 00:14:11,800 --> 00:14:15,800 Speaker 2: She'd be like yes, But then come to find out, well, 221 00:14:15,840 --> 00:14:17,600 Speaker 2: she's still talking to a lot of people on the 222 00:14:17,679 --> 00:14:23,080 Speaker 2: side and keeping things secret. And then you know, out 223 00:14:23,120 --> 00:14:25,960 Speaker 2: of nowhere, she'll do a breakup and be like, well, 224 00:14:25,960 --> 00:14:28,760 Speaker 2: I'm going to step away for a while. You know, 225 00:14:29,600 --> 00:14:32,600 Speaker 2: maybe we'll meet up again. And you're like, wait, will 226 00:14:33,320 --> 00:14:33,560 Speaker 2: you know? 227 00:14:33,640 --> 00:14:37,720 Speaker 1: And this? Yeah, and do this is the whole thing. 228 00:14:37,760 --> 00:14:39,200 Speaker 1: And if you don't want to get into it, we toil. 229 00:14:39,280 --> 00:14:44,400 Speaker 1: They don't have to, but like, yeah, what what do 230 00:14:44,440 --> 00:14:46,840 Speaker 1: you think was the cause of your divorce? 231 00:14:50,160 --> 00:14:55,120 Speaker 2: The cause of my divorce honestly was we both married 232 00:14:55,120 --> 00:15:02,720 Speaker 2: each other too young and did not didn't not so 233 00:15:02,880 --> 00:15:05,240 Speaker 2: oats you know, so to speak. 234 00:15:05,440 --> 00:15:06,080 Speaker 4: And. 235 00:15:10,040 --> 00:15:13,080 Speaker 2: I don't regret it. We had an amazing child, you know, 236 00:15:13,120 --> 00:15:17,160 Speaker 2: from that marriage, and accomplished a lot, but you know, 237 00:15:17,280 --> 00:15:24,280 Speaker 2: just time definitely revealed, you know, that we were not compatible, 238 00:15:24,640 --> 00:15:30,160 Speaker 2: you know, in several ways, and I think that was 239 00:15:31,000 --> 00:15:34,560 Speaker 2: just honestly, definitely the cause of it is just being 240 00:15:34,600 --> 00:15:40,640 Speaker 2: married too young, too early and not having you know, 241 00:15:40,720 --> 00:15:43,120 Speaker 2: really gone out there and seeing what's out there. 242 00:15:45,440 --> 00:15:47,400 Speaker 1: Well, it's it's interesting to me that you say that, 243 00:15:47,440 --> 00:15:49,760 Speaker 1: because that is a totally how old were you when 244 00:15:49,800 --> 00:15:50,320 Speaker 1: you got married. 245 00:15:53,320 --> 00:15:56,920 Speaker 2: We started seeing each other when I was twenty two, 246 00:15:57,080 --> 00:15:58,320 Speaker 2: we got married at twenty four. 247 00:15:59,040 --> 00:16:01,960 Speaker 1: Okay, so he is a marriage. It's it's pretty that's 248 00:16:02,000 --> 00:16:04,200 Speaker 1: a solid run. That's a good run. 249 00:16:04,640 --> 00:16:05,800 Speaker 2: It's a solid run. 250 00:16:05,880 --> 00:16:10,040 Speaker 1: Oh, it's a real good run. That's a real solid run. 251 00:16:10,240 --> 00:16:12,520 Speaker 1: But now you're back out there and your nick you 252 00:16:12,520 --> 00:16:16,280 Speaker 1: you're like, oh, yeah, dating, dating, by the way, you know, 253 00:16:16,320 --> 00:16:18,760 Speaker 1: I it sucks for everybody. It sucks for guys, it 254 00:16:18,840 --> 00:16:21,720 Speaker 1: sucks for girls. It sucks if you're young. It sucks 255 00:16:21,720 --> 00:16:26,840 Speaker 1: if you're older. Actually that's not true, if you are no, 256 00:16:26,960 --> 00:16:32,240 Speaker 1: if you're actually, if you're young and really really attractive, 257 00:16:33,800 --> 00:16:40,080 Speaker 1: it's probably but I wouldn't know. So, yeah, it sucks 258 00:16:40,120 --> 00:16:44,160 Speaker 1: out there. So what about what's going on in the 259 00:16:44,200 --> 00:16:47,040 Speaker 1: rest of your life? The professional life. Let's talk about that. 260 00:16:47,200 --> 00:16:49,200 Speaker 1: Let's get a let's get a well rounded picture of you. 261 00:16:51,880 --> 00:17:01,080 Speaker 2: Okay. So so basically I've been doing it work for 262 00:17:01,120 --> 00:17:05,040 Speaker 2: a while now, like a really long time. I decided, 263 00:17:05,200 --> 00:17:08,439 Speaker 2: you know what, you know, I'm getting old, it's getting competitive. 264 00:17:11,160 --> 00:17:13,399 Speaker 2: It just isn't fun keeping up, you know, with all 265 00:17:13,440 --> 00:17:15,760 Speaker 2: the changes in society and everything else. You know, just 266 00:17:16,320 --> 00:17:19,399 Speaker 2: it's just NonStop being beaten over the head, you know 267 00:17:19,480 --> 00:17:23,800 Speaker 2: when you work in it. And so I did a 268 00:17:23,840 --> 00:17:28,200 Speaker 2: stint in graphic design, which is, you know what I 269 00:17:28,200 --> 00:17:30,119 Speaker 2: would like to do more of, because you know, I 270 00:17:30,200 --> 00:17:35,320 Speaker 2: have a whole artistic site. But I had a really 271 00:17:35,400 --> 00:17:37,760 Speaker 2: shitty boss, so I had to go back into it. 272 00:17:39,840 --> 00:17:45,800 Speaker 2: The pandemic happened and I lost my job because apparently 273 00:17:45,920 --> 00:17:48,120 Speaker 2: the company was going to lose money, but it turns 274 00:17:48,160 --> 00:17:50,720 Speaker 2: out they actually made more money in the end. But 275 00:17:51,880 --> 00:17:54,200 Speaker 2: regardless of that, I ended up getting the job i'm 276 00:17:54,200 --> 00:18:01,000 Speaker 2: at now, and basically I'm a call center supervisor right now, 277 00:18:01,640 --> 00:18:07,720 Speaker 2: manager supervisor what you won't call it? And it sucks. 278 00:18:09,840 --> 00:18:10,280 Speaker 5: Mm hmm. 279 00:18:11,560 --> 00:18:15,640 Speaker 1: What does anything? Does anything give you happiness in life 280 00:18:15,840 --> 00:18:16,160 Speaker 1: right now? 281 00:18:18,359 --> 00:18:18,520 Speaker 5: Oh? 282 00:18:18,640 --> 00:18:21,520 Speaker 2: Yeah, definitely. I mean my kid, I have a really 283 00:18:21,600 --> 00:18:26,399 Speaker 2: amazing kid. He's ten going on eleven, I gets your 284 00:18:26,400 --> 00:18:35,639 Speaker 2: way from making art and yeah, I mean those times 285 00:18:35,680 --> 00:18:42,920 Speaker 2: I'm with my narcissistic, you know partner. You know, I'm 286 00:18:43,000 --> 00:18:44,840 Speaker 2: happy because we have a we go out, we have 287 00:18:44,880 --> 00:18:49,239 Speaker 2: a great time. But it's just, you know, it's uh, 288 00:18:49,840 --> 00:18:54,560 Speaker 2: these kind of people have different personalities, you know, and 289 00:18:54,600 --> 00:18:56,840 Speaker 2: the next day she can be a completely different person. 290 00:18:57,400 --> 00:18:59,960 Speaker 1: When you say I'm sorry, you're I'm sorry if I'm coming. 291 00:19:00,240 --> 00:19:02,360 Speaker 1: But when you say your narcisstic partner, you're talking about 292 00:19:02,400 --> 00:19:04,240 Speaker 1: your ex wife or the person you're with right. 293 00:19:04,200 --> 00:19:07,639 Speaker 2: Now, the girl I'm dating right now. 294 00:19:08,320 --> 00:19:13,600 Speaker 1: Okay, okay, I say, sathy to you, So you're still 295 00:19:13,680 --> 00:19:15,600 Speaker 1: dating this? This is the person who you said, who 296 00:19:15,640 --> 00:19:17,000 Speaker 1: you fell in love with, who you said was you're 297 00:19:17,000 --> 00:19:19,080 Speaker 1: going to be your girlfriend that? Or is this a 298 00:19:19,119 --> 00:19:19,680 Speaker 1: different person? 299 00:19:20,359 --> 00:19:24,200 Speaker 2: Well it's it's an on and off relationship. Yeah, but yes, 300 00:19:24,440 --> 00:19:26,760 Speaker 2: currently we are dating. Currently we're dating again. 301 00:19:26,840 --> 00:19:30,240 Speaker 1: Okay, just like can just this person that you're currently 302 00:19:30,320 --> 00:19:33,040 Speaker 1: dating are you referring to as a narcissist? Are they 303 00:19:33,119 --> 00:19:37,199 Speaker 1: making your life? Are they in general in general? Are 304 00:19:37,240 --> 00:19:38,600 Speaker 1: they making your life better or worse? 305 00:19:42,080 --> 00:19:42,439 Speaker 4: Mmmm? 306 00:19:45,720 --> 00:19:46,480 Speaker 2: Currently worse? 307 00:19:47,240 --> 00:19:53,720 Speaker 1: Okay, I mean look bro, uh. 308 00:19:54,119 --> 00:19:57,359 Speaker 2: It's it's just it's a suspicion in stress, I know, 309 00:19:57,440 --> 00:20:00,560 Speaker 2: And that's that's just part it's part of the whole game. Yeah, 310 00:20:00,640 --> 00:20:02,800 Speaker 2: they do, and it's just you know, I've accepted it. 311 00:20:03,840 --> 00:20:04,199 Speaker 5: Yeah, So. 312 00:20:05,760 --> 00:20:07,320 Speaker 1: Why have you? Why have you accepted it? 313 00:20:09,359 --> 00:20:12,800 Speaker 2: Just because I know that that's part of her personality. 314 00:20:13,119 --> 00:20:17,800 Speaker 2: It's part of her you know, Uh, Psyche, that's it's 315 00:20:17,840 --> 00:20:21,320 Speaker 2: something that she is going to do and continue to 316 00:20:21,359 --> 00:20:24,760 Speaker 2: behave this way, and it's not something that she can 317 00:20:24,840 --> 00:20:28,320 Speaker 2: change about herself, I don't think, because she she needs 318 00:20:28,520 --> 00:20:35,040 Speaker 2: the attention, you know, and she will justify it. 319 00:20:35,880 --> 00:20:41,800 Speaker 1: Will I'm gonna I'm gonna will. Is this a sex thing? 320 00:20:42,680 --> 00:20:42,840 Speaker 5: Is it? 321 00:20:43,000 --> 00:20:43,040 Speaker 6: Like? 322 00:20:44,359 --> 00:20:46,720 Speaker 1: Is it like I'm afraid of not being able to 323 00:20:46,800 --> 00:20:49,600 Speaker 1: have sex and being alone and so I'm gonna be 324 00:20:49,760 --> 00:20:52,720 Speaker 1: with this person who is making man happy because I'd 325 00:20:52,840 --> 00:20:56,240 Speaker 1: rather do that than be alone and sexless. 326 00:20:58,960 --> 00:21:02,800 Speaker 2: Uh. That could be part of like a small part 327 00:21:02,840 --> 00:21:04,040 Speaker 2: of it. That could definitely. 328 00:21:04,520 --> 00:21:11,360 Speaker 1: Okay, because that's have affection okay, and that leads into 329 00:21:11,400 --> 00:21:13,520 Speaker 1: it too. I don't know why I said sex, but 330 00:21:13,720 --> 00:21:17,160 Speaker 1: the sex and affection thing because like, dude, I guess 331 00:21:17,240 --> 00:21:21,440 Speaker 1: I don't if you're you don't want to be actively 332 00:21:21,640 --> 00:21:24,360 Speaker 1: referring to the person that you are dating as a narcissist. 333 00:21:25,240 --> 00:21:27,080 Speaker 1: That's that. I don't think that's good. And and you 334 00:21:27,119 --> 00:21:28,320 Speaker 1: don't even need me to tell you any of that 335 00:21:28,400 --> 00:21:32,840 Speaker 1: ship you already know that. So I'm glad that you 336 00:21:32,960 --> 00:21:34,800 Speaker 1: have things in your life that are making you happy, 337 00:21:34,880 --> 00:21:39,720 Speaker 1: like your kid and art and whatnot. But I I 338 00:21:39,960 --> 00:21:44,760 Speaker 1: I hate for you to settle just because you don't 339 00:21:44,800 --> 00:21:47,959 Speaker 1: want to go back out there, you settle with somebody 340 00:21:48,320 --> 00:21:50,800 Speaker 1: who you really don't like, because that's just gonna make 341 00:21:50,840 --> 00:21:53,840 Speaker 1: your life what that's gonna Your life's gonna be way 342 00:21:54,080 --> 00:21:56,440 Speaker 1: worse being with somebody who you refer to as a 343 00:21:56,560 --> 00:22:00,920 Speaker 1: narcissist than being alone and Jack and all, Jack and off. 344 00:22:01,320 --> 00:22:03,800 Speaker 1: You know what I'm going to say it, Will, I'm 345 00:22:03,840 --> 00:22:05,280 Speaker 1: going to say it, and I know you know it, 346 00:22:05,359 --> 00:22:07,240 Speaker 1: and I know the people out there know it. I'm 347 00:22:07,240 --> 00:22:09,119 Speaker 1: going to say it so that everyone can hear me 348 00:22:09,240 --> 00:22:11,840 Speaker 1: pretty loudly. I'm going to say what the people want 349 00:22:11,840 --> 00:22:15,880 Speaker 1: to say. Being alone and Jack and off is kind 350 00:22:15,920 --> 00:22:20,520 Speaker 1: of awesome, Okay. 351 00:22:30,359 --> 00:22:32,439 Speaker 2: I feel like the ripples of that is going out 352 00:22:32,480 --> 00:22:33,639 Speaker 2: into the universe right now. 353 00:22:33,840 --> 00:22:35,600 Speaker 1: The ripples of that are indeed going out in the 354 00:22:35,680 --> 00:22:41,880 Speaker 1: universe right now. That's what that moment of silence was. Well, Will, 355 00:22:42,480 --> 00:22:43,720 Speaker 1: what's the future look like for you? 356 00:22:48,359 --> 00:22:59,119 Speaker 2: I believe my art is actually pretty good now, and 357 00:22:59,760 --> 00:23:04,440 Speaker 2: I plan to pivot and doing more of, you know, 358 00:23:04,560 --> 00:23:08,280 Speaker 2: the things I that I want to do, you know, 359 00:23:08,400 --> 00:23:11,280 Speaker 2: because I've spent these forty four years pretty much pleasing 360 00:23:12,280 --> 00:23:14,840 Speaker 2: everybody else, and I think it's, you know, it's time 361 00:23:14,920 --> 00:23:19,840 Speaker 2: to do some self love and start doing some of 362 00:23:19,880 --> 00:23:22,720 Speaker 2: the things that you know, I kick ass at good 363 00:23:22,800 --> 00:23:23,960 Speaker 2: Man good. 364 00:23:24,160 --> 00:23:28,919 Speaker 1: It seems like it seems like you're you actually are, 365 00:23:29,160 --> 00:23:34,240 Speaker 1: like really you know, solid pockets of your life that 366 00:23:34,359 --> 00:23:35,680 Speaker 1: are keeping you well afloat. 367 00:23:36,040 --> 00:23:36,240 Speaker 3: You know. 368 00:23:36,400 --> 00:23:38,080 Speaker 1: I'm glad you have a great relationship with your kid. 369 00:23:38,119 --> 00:23:40,760 Speaker 1: I'm glad you feel confident in yourself. I feel like 370 00:23:40,800 --> 00:23:42,959 Speaker 1: that's the most important thing. What do you make art? 371 00:23:42,960 --> 00:23:44,040 Speaker 1: What do you make art about? 372 00:23:47,920 --> 00:23:51,000 Speaker 2: All different kinds of things. So I've been doing a 373 00:23:51,040 --> 00:23:53,359 Speaker 2: couple of landscapes, I'm starting to do some more like 374 00:23:53,520 --> 00:23:59,119 Speaker 2: pop art, and yeah, I think I'm gonna do uh 375 00:24:00,080 --> 00:24:03,879 Speaker 2: a new painting pretty soon. I'm taking maybe like an 376 00:24:04,000 --> 00:24:05,560 Speaker 2: edgarupt mm hmmm. 377 00:24:05,800 --> 00:24:07,760 Speaker 1: Do you have an art Instagram that you want to share? 378 00:24:07,800 --> 00:24:09,119 Speaker 1: You don't have to if you don't want to. 379 00:24:11,359 --> 00:24:13,840 Speaker 2: Uh, I have one. I actually started not too long ago. 380 00:24:13,960 --> 00:24:20,040 Speaker 2: It's uh sure it's Will dot the Dot Artist with 381 00:24:20,200 --> 00:24:20,840 Speaker 2: an underscore. 382 00:24:22,680 --> 00:24:26,840 Speaker 1: Wow, I'm surprised that wasn't taken even with the underscores 383 00:24:26,880 --> 00:24:27,679 Speaker 1: and dots and stuff. 384 00:24:29,480 --> 00:24:29,680 Speaker 3: Yeah. 385 00:24:31,000 --> 00:24:32,040 Speaker 1: Here, I'm gonna go to it right now. 386 00:24:32,080 --> 00:24:38,920 Speaker 2: What is it against? Will dot the Dot artist with 387 00:24:39,080 --> 00:24:39,720 Speaker 2: an underscore? 388 00:24:42,640 --> 00:24:44,760 Speaker 5: Are tist. 389 00:24:46,400 --> 00:24:51,719 Speaker 1: And an underscore? Okay, let's check this out. Oh all right, 390 00:24:51,720 --> 00:24:53,399 Speaker 1: we there, we go. We got your we got your 391 00:24:53,440 --> 00:24:55,120 Speaker 1: first and last name. That's out there. 392 00:24:55,160 --> 00:24:58,040 Speaker 2: Okay, yeah, it's okay. 393 00:24:59,640 --> 00:25:01,359 Speaker 1: Is that with you? I can bleep it out if 394 00:25:01,560 --> 00:25:05,680 Speaker 1: if it's not, that's fine. Okay. 395 00:25:06,880 --> 00:25:07,280 Speaker 4: I like this. 396 00:25:07,520 --> 00:25:08,360 Speaker 1: This looks pretty cool. 397 00:25:09,680 --> 00:25:10,000 Speaker 3: What is that? 398 00:25:10,119 --> 00:25:10,639 Speaker 1: Who is that? 399 00:25:10,720 --> 00:25:10,880 Speaker 6: Dave? 400 00:25:10,920 --> 00:25:13,120 Speaker 1: I'm gonna sound like an idiot. That's not David. Who's 401 00:25:13,160 --> 00:25:13,760 Speaker 1: that with the guitar? 402 00:25:15,960 --> 00:25:17,840 Speaker 2: Yeah it's Martin Gore? 403 00:25:19,280 --> 00:25:21,000 Speaker 1: Nice man. Who's this girl? 404 00:25:24,320 --> 00:25:24,439 Speaker 6: Uh? 405 00:25:24,560 --> 00:25:25,560 Speaker 2: That is a girl? I need it? 406 00:25:26,960 --> 00:25:33,120 Speaker 1: She looks cool. And then this is uh Flora plans 407 00:25:33,440 --> 00:25:34,200 Speaker 1: to a Walmart? 408 00:25:34,280 --> 00:25:34,639 Speaker 3: What is this? 409 00:25:38,720 --> 00:25:44,160 Speaker 2: It's basically a role playing like map, architectural map. 410 00:25:47,800 --> 00:25:49,040 Speaker 1: You know what? Will you got a good life? 411 00:25:51,920 --> 00:25:52,200 Speaker 2: Thanks? 412 00:25:52,240 --> 00:25:52,400 Speaker 5: Man? 413 00:25:52,560 --> 00:25:53,119 Speaker 2: Appreciate that. 414 00:25:54,880 --> 00:25:57,359 Speaker 1: M sore. Well thanks for talking about all this stuff. Man, 415 00:25:57,359 --> 00:25:59,959 Speaker 1: I'm glad. Do you do you have a real therapist 416 00:26:00,080 --> 00:26:01,320 Speaker 1: that you talked to about these things? 417 00:26:04,600 --> 00:26:09,720 Speaker 2: Unfortunately no, I just kind of do the stoic maile 418 00:26:09,840 --> 00:26:12,359 Speaker 2: thing and just kind of like this his life. You know, 419 00:26:12,440 --> 00:26:13,000 Speaker 2: it could be worse. 420 00:26:13,080 --> 00:26:15,960 Speaker 1: I do the stoic male thing, and I talked to 421 00:26:16,040 --> 00:26:19,720 Speaker 1: a guy in a gecko suit about it and still. 422 00:26:19,760 --> 00:26:22,359 Speaker 2: Yes, as one does. 423 00:26:24,160 --> 00:26:26,560 Speaker 1: Well, thanks for calling, Will, and good luck to you 424 00:26:26,600 --> 00:26:28,760 Speaker 1: in the future man, and anything else you want to 425 00:26:28,760 --> 00:26:30,240 Speaker 1: say to the people of the computer before we go. 426 00:26:33,680 --> 00:26:38,840 Speaker 2: Yeah, check out Alan Watts. He will start you on 427 00:26:38,960 --> 00:26:39,520 Speaker 2: a good journey. 428 00:26:42,720 --> 00:26:44,880 Speaker 1: Beautiful. Take care man. Thanks for calling. 429 00:26:46,200 --> 00:26:47,280 Speaker 2: All right, all right, but. 430 00:26:49,080 --> 00:26:50,879 Speaker 1: Oh crap, I just really he said in the in 431 00:26:50,960 --> 00:26:55,960 Speaker 1: the call screening notes that he met God. I didn't 432 00:26:55,960 --> 00:26:58,359 Speaker 1: get to ask him about that. I wonder if you 433 00:26:58,440 --> 00:27:02,479 Speaker 1: met God on Tinder? Is God a thirty seven year 434 00:27:02,520 --> 00:27:04,719 Speaker 1: old woman on okay Cupid? 435 00:27:06,520 --> 00:27:06,800 Speaker 4: He is? 436 00:27:07,480 --> 00:27:10,200 Speaker 1: You know why? Because he's all of us. I don't know. 437 00:27:10,240 --> 00:27:15,120 Speaker 1: I don't know what I'm saying. Thanks for calling Will, Hello, Hello, 438 00:27:15,840 --> 00:27:18,000 Speaker 1: what's up? Hey? Is this geg. 439 00:27:19,560 --> 00:27:19,679 Speaker 6: Uh? 440 00:27:20,520 --> 00:27:21,359 Speaker 1: Yeah, man? How are you? 441 00:27:23,359 --> 00:27:23,880 Speaker 5: I'm all right? 442 00:27:24,280 --> 00:27:29,199 Speaker 4: Uh, I'm okay. Just it's just wanted to come on here, 443 00:27:29,520 --> 00:27:31,439 Speaker 4: you know, share some thoughts and whatnot. 444 00:27:31,840 --> 00:27:34,000 Speaker 1: What kinds of thoughts and feelings would you like to share. 445 00:27:35,960 --> 00:27:40,320 Speaker 5: So I've been living with my brother for about a 446 00:27:40,480 --> 00:27:45,200 Speaker 5: year now, and we moved out together. He's a he's 447 00:27:45,280 --> 00:27:48,199 Speaker 5: twenty four and I'm twenty, and. 448 00:27:49,680 --> 00:27:50,480 Speaker 1: So it's just. 449 00:27:52,160 --> 00:27:55,320 Speaker 4: It's been it's been okay, like you know, we get along. 450 00:27:55,200 --> 00:28:00,399 Speaker 5: And everything, and it's it's everything's fine and there I 451 00:28:00,440 --> 00:28:01,960 Speaker 5: pay rent, he pays rent and all that. 452 00:28:02,600 --> 00:28:07,639 Speaker 4: But it's been a lot of times recently, I just 453 00:28:07,840 --> 00:28:10,480 Speaker 4: I feel like he's. 454 00:28:12,359 --> 00:28:13,080 Speaker 3: How do I wear this? 455 00:28:13,359 --> 00:28:18,760 Speaker 5: Like he feels like he's trying to have authority over me, 456 00:28:18,880 --> 00:28:21,000 Speaker 5: you know, like he's trying to. 457 00:28:22,600 --> 00:28:23,439 Speaker 4: He's just trying to be. 458 00:28:25,480 --> 00:28:32,160 Speaker 5: The bigger person in every situation, and just it's it's weird. 459 00:28:32,200 --> 00:28:34,080 Speaker 5: I don't I haven't really talked about it with anyone. 460 00:28:34,119 --> 00:28:35,960 Speaker 5: I don't know, I've never really put its words. I 461 00:28:36,080 --> 00:28:39,200 Speaker 5: just I thought you were streaming, and I thought this 462 00:28:39,280 --> 00:28:41,080 Speaker 5: would be the chance to really get it out there. 463 00:28:41,440 --> 00:28:45,680 Speaker 5: So but it seems like he had like how he's 464 00:28:45,760 --> 00:28:46,640 Speaker 5: twenty four and I'm. 465 00:28:46,560 --> 00:28:49,520 Speaker 1: Twenty Okay, so he's trying He's not that much older 466 00:28:49,520 --> 00:28:52,160 Speaker 1: than me, all Right, so you both pay equal rent 467 00:28:52,280 --> 00:28:56,760 Speaker 1: on the house. But he's still trying to like big 468 00:28:56,880 --> 00:28:57,360 Speaker 1: time yet. 469 00:28:59,440 --> 00:29:02,320 Speaker 5: Yeah, it's really weird. Like it's like he took the 470 00:29:02,440 --> 00:29:04,560 Speaker 5: role of our dad, like as soon as we got 471 00:29:04,560 --> 00:29:07,120 Speaker 5: out of the house, and it's is he. 472 00:29:07,520 --> 00:29:15,640 Speaker 1: Is he reminding you of your dad? Oh one, what 473 00:29:15,920 --> 00:29:18,760 Speaker 1: things does he do about to alpha you around? 474 00:29:21,440 --> 00:29:23,160 Speaker 4: That's a good way to put it, Alpha me around? 475 00:29:24,000 --> 00:29:26,960 Speaker 1: But uh, he like. 476 00:29:28,640 --> 00:29:31,840 Speaker 5: So we have a weekly schedule of cleaning, uh where 477 00:29:32,040 --> 00:29:35,640 Speaker 5: I do one week, I do stuff and then he 478 00:29:35,760 --> 00:29:38,560 Speaker 5: does the other stuff and then next week we switch. Right, 479 00:29:40,160 --> 00:29:47,440 Speaker 5: There's been times where he'll he'll he'll tell me to 480 00:29:47,640 --> 00:29:50,880 Speaker 5: you know, do He'll he'll run down the schedule of 481 00:29:51,120 --> 00:29:52,520 Speaker 5: like of what's going on. 482 00:29:53,640 --> 00:29:55,840 Speaker 1: And just so much like. 483 00:29:57,600 --> 00:29:59,320 Speaker 4: If the way he talks to me is just so 484 00:29:59,560 --> 00:30:00,480 Speaker 4: talking down to me. 485 00:30:00,960 --> 00:30:03,040 Speaker 5: And even when I do what I'm supposed to do, 486 00:30:03,080 --> 00:30:06,400 Speaker 5: because I get everything usually done in like half hour 487 00:30:06,640 --> 00:30:09,600 Speaker 5: of an hour, well not everything, but like majority of 488 00:30:09,640 --> 00:30:14,560 Speaker 5: what I'm supposed to do, and he he's like, there's 489 00:30:14,600 --> 00:30:24,280 Speaker 5: no how do I sorry, Uh, it's. 490 00:30:24,200 --> 00:30:26,920 Speaker 1: Let me ask you. Let me ask you him. Yeah, 491 00:30:27,520 --> 00:30:29,520 Speaker 1: all right, this is clearly and I get this. There's 492 00:30:29,520 --> 00:30:32,520 Speaker 1: a lot of times in arguments and ship where you know, 493 00:30:32,640 --> 00:30:35,960 Speaker 1: you just don't have fucking concrete examples and evidence, but 494 00:30:36,120 --> 00:30:38,760 Speaker 1: you have the way you feel. I get that. I've 495 00:30:38,760 --> 00:30:44,840 Speaker 1: been there before. Have you told your brother about this shit? 496 00:30:45,360 --> 00:30:47,040 Speaker 1: Have you had a conversation with him? 497 00:30:47,600 --> 00:30:50,920 Speaker 5: I've We've argued about it where like I'll tell him, like, 498 00:30:51,040 --> 00:30:53,360 Speaker 5: he's just like our dad, and he gets so pissed, 499 00:30:53,520 --> 00:30:55,720 Speaker 5: but like the way he gets pissed is just like 500 00:30:55,880 --> 00:30:57,680 Speaker 5: our dad, and. 501 00:30:59,720 --> 00:31:00,080 Speaker 4: He he. 502 00:31:02,320 --> 00:31:07,080 Speaker 5: He gets he gets physical too, and that was much 503 00:31:07,280 --> 00:31:08,560 Speaker 5: like our dad growing up. 504 00:31:09,320 --> 00:31:10,080 Speaker 4: Yeah, he hits me. 505 00:31:11,200 --> 00:31:12,360 Speaker 1: Okay, your brother's hitting you. 506 00:31:14,160 --> 00:31:14,760 Speaker 4: He's hitting me. 507 00:31:14,880 --> 00:31:16,880 Speaker 5: He's he's he's treating he's treating. 508 00:31:16,640 --> 00:31:17,760 Speaker 4: Me like our dad used to do. 509 00:31:18,840 --> 00:31:21,240 Speaker 5: My dad was an old school he grew he was 510 00:31:21,320 --> 00:31:23,720 Speaker 5: fifty when I was born. He grew up old school 511 00:31:23,760 --> 00:31:28,840 Speaker 5: in the in the seventies and eighties and. 512 00:31:30,720 --> 00:31:32,000 Speaker 4: Or whenever he grew up. 513 00:31:32,160 --> 00:31:33,480 Speaker 2: But he grew up. 514 00:31:34,000 --> 00:31:35,840 Speaker 5: That's how he wouldn't talk. 515 00:31:36,120 --> 00:31:38,640 Speaker 4: Our dad wouldn't talk much about how he grew up. 516 00:31:38,840 --> 00:31:42,040 Speaker 4: But you know that whole thing where he kind of 517 00:31:42,880 --> 00:31:44,640 Speaker 4: when you grow up and have kids. 518 00:31:44,400 --> 00:31:47,800 Speaker 5: You you sort of have patterns with when how you 519 00:31:47,880 --> 00:31:48,440 Speaker 5: were raised. 520 00:31:48,880 --> 00:31:52,680 Speaker 1: Yeah, so you heard that all right? So So what 521 00:31:52,760 --> 00:31:54,680 Speaker 1: you're what you're getting at here is that your dad 522 00:31:55,560 --> 00:31:59,480 Speaker 1: would fucking hit you and hit your brother. And now 523 00:31:59,520 --> 00:32:01,680 Speaker 1: you're now you're living with your brother. Now your brother's 524 00:32:01,760 --> 00:32:06,200 Speaker 1: hitting you. Yeah, and you guys are you guys are adults? 525 00:32:06,240 --> 00:32:07,920 Speaker 1: You're twenty and twenty. 526 00:32:07,680 --> 00:32:11,960 Speaker 5: Four or full on adults, full jobs and ship. Okay, 527 00:32:12,080 --> 00:32:13,600 Speaker 5: Like I work as a plumber. 528 00:32:14,320 --> 00:32:15,720 Speaker 4: I've been doing it two years now. 529 00:32:16,440 --> 00:32:17,680 Speaker 2: Like it's a shitty job. 530 00:32:18,520 --> 00:32:23,280 Speaker 4: Funny, but uh but it pays the bills, pays my half. 531 00:32:24,040 --> 00:32:27,080 Speaker 1: And I like your I like your way of bringing 532 00:32:27,160 --> 00:32:29,000 Speaker 1: levity into the situation with a joke. 533 00:32:30,160 --> 00:32:33,600 Speaker 4: Yeah, I try to. You know, it could be worse, 534 00:32:35,560 --> 00:32:36,640 Speaker 4: It could be way worse. 535 00:32:37,040 --> 00:32:40,720 Speaker 1: But all right, Matthew, how long you've been living with 536 00:32:40,760 --> 00:32:41,040 Speaker 1: your brother? 537 00:32:41,120 --> 00:32:49,360 Speaker 4: For living with him for what is it? It's month 538 00:32:49,480 --> 00:32:50,640 Speaker 4: is July, so that'd be. 539 00:32:52,280 --> 00:32:54,080 Speaker 5: A year and four months. 540 00:32:54,320 --> 00:32:55,240 Speaker 4: Now you're in. 541 00:32:55,240 --> 00:32:57,280 Speaker 1: Form in four months, okay, So it's been a year 542 00:32:57,320 --> 00:32:57,920 Speaker 1: and four months. 543 00:32:58,480 --> 00:33:00,360 Speaker 2: And we tried to move out. 544 00:33:00,440 --> 00:33:02,880 Speaker 5: He moved out the second he hit graduation. 545 00:33:03,320 --> 00:33:06,920 Speaker 4: He moved out and did his whatever he did. 546 00:33:07,240 --> 00:33:10,240 Speaker 1: And so so how how many times over the course 547 00:33:10,320 --> 00:33:12,120 Speaker 1: how many times over the course of that year and 548 00:33:12,400 --> 00:33:15,560 Speaker 1: four months does did he was he hitting you? 549 00:33:18,480 --> 00:33:18,880 Speaker 6: It didn't. 550 00:33:19,120 --> 00:33:21,560 Speaker 5: In the beginning, it was fine, Like like the first 551 00:33:21,640 --> 00:33:24,720 Speaker 5: I'd say, like six months, it was like, okay, you know, 552 00:33:24,760 --> 00:33:26,760 Speaker 5: we'd get into arguments. Brothers use it all the time. 553 00:33:27,040 --> 00:33:30,640 Speaker 5: We'd always we're not like the closest brothers. 554 00:33:30,320 --> 00:33:35,640 Speaker 1: In the world. But but Matthew MaTx got along and Matthew, Yeah, 555 00:33:36,040 --> 00:33:37,840 Speaker 1: how many times in the year and a half, in 556 00:33:38,040 --> 00:33:39,480 Speaker 1: the year and four months did he hit you? 557 00:33:42,080 --> 00:33:45,680 Speaker 5: I'd say at least like once to twice a week. 558 00:33:46,240 --> 00:33:47,720 Speaker 1: Once to twice a week. 559 00:33:49,440 --> 00:33:51,160 Speaker 5: A week. Yeah, there may be there'd be a week 560 00:33:51,280 --> 00:33:53,800 Speaker 5: where he didn't. May there'd be weeks where it'd be more. 561 00:33:54,640 --> 00:34:01,320 Speaker 1: But all right, Matthew, mmm, and you haven't told you. 562 00:34:02,320 --> 00:34:03,680 Speaker 1: I'm the first one you're telling about this. 563 00:34:06,360 --> 00:34:07,280 Speaker 4: I pulled my cat. 564 00:34:09,480 --> 00:34:12,279 Speaker 1: Okay, matt Well, I want to let me say a 565 00:34:12,360 --> 00:34:15,359 Speaker 1: few things. One, Matthew, you seem like a real nice, 566 00:34:15,560 --> 00:34:18,759 Speaker 1: real sweet dude, and I'm really real I I feel 567 00:34:18,800 --> 00:34:20,480 Speaker 1: bad because you have to sounds like you have to 568 00:34:20,520 --> 00:34:23,920 Speaker 1: go through this fucking twice because like it sounds like 569 00:34:24,000 --> 00:34:28,759 Speaker 1: your dad was not fucking super awesome. And then it 570 00:34:28,840 --> 00:34:31,279 Speaker 1: was like, finally, you're eighteen, you can get out of 571 00:34:31,360 --> 00:34:33,759 Speaker 1: the house. And then now you're living with a mini 572 00:34:34,480 --> 00:34:37,560 Speaker 1: version of your dad, and like, bro, I don't know, 573 00:34:37,640 --> 00:34:39,640 Speaker 1: I feel bad for your brother too, because like I'm 574 00:34:39,680 --> 00:34:42,560 Speaker 1: sure he you know, is hurting as well. But like 575 00:34:43,800 --> 00:34:46,360 Speaker 1: at twenty four years old, you gotta you gotta, you 576 00:34:46,480 --> 00:34:48,440 Speaker 1: gotta work out what the fuck is going on with 577 00:34:48,560 --> 00:34:50,279 Speaker 1: you and not be taking it out on your little 578 00:34:50,320 --> 00:34:54,520 Speaker 1: brother because you seem like a nice guy. So yeah, 579 00:34:55,320 --> 00:34:57,799 Speaker 1: and you don't deserve. And also you're you're twenty, you're 580 00:34:57,840 --> 00:35:01,520 Speaker 1: making your own money. You should be allowed, would you you? 581 00:35:01,840 --> 00:35:04,560 Speaker 1: You deserve to be able to live in his safe, 582 00:35:05,040 --> 00:35:07,799 Speaker 1: chill place where you're not dealing with your brother being 583 00:35:07,840 --> 00:35:12,240 Speaker 1: an asshole. So yeah, I mean there's lots of things 584 00:35:12,719 --> 00:35:14,839 Speaker 1: here that I'm thinking about. 585 00:35:14,920 --> 00:35:15,839 Speaker 4: I appreciate that man. 586 00:35:17,600 --> 00:35:23,520 Speaker 1: So let's well, let's well, let's start with Gecko solutions 587 00:35:23,600 --> 00:35:26,919 Speaker 1: and then I will for you, and then I'll refer 588 00:35:27,040 --> 00:35:32,440 Speaker 1: you out to other uh solutions. But are you are you? 589 00:35:32,640 --> 00:35:35,439 Speaker 1: Are you want to least? Are you on a least 590 00:35:35,480 --> 00:35:37,600 Speaker 1: with him? No? 591 00:35:38,440 --> 00:35:40,880 Speaker 5: The house isn't fully in his property. 592 00:35:41,800 --> 00:35:46,360 Speaker 1: Oh it's in his name, so he he owns it. 593 00:35:46,840 --> 00:35:49,919 Speaker 5: It's in his name. He's letting me stay and pay half? 594 00:35:51,000 --> 00:35:53,359 Speaker 1: Is he so he bought it and you're helping him 595 00:35:53,360 --> 00:35:57,560 Speaker 1: pay the mortgage? Yeah, did he buy it or was it? 596 00:35:57,600 --> 00:36:02,400 Speaker 5: Like a family, It's just it's a what did. 597 00:36:02,000 --> 00:36:03,880 Speaker 1: Did he buy it? Or did your dad give it 598 00:36:03,960 --> 00:36:04,239 Speaker 1: to them? 599 00:36:06,360 --> 00:36:08,680 Speaker 5: It's in our dad's name, but then now it's been 600 00:36:08,760 --> 00:36:11,120 Speaker 5: moved to his name. Our dad passed away two years ago. 601 00:36:11,760 --> 00:36:12,400 Speaker 4: When I was. 602 00:36:14,320 --> 00:36:19,920 Speaker 1: I'm sorry to hear that, man, So your dad's That's 603 00:36:19,960 --> 00:36:21,800 Speaker 1: what I was thinking. So your dad passed away and 604 00:36:21,880 --> 00:36:25,840 Speaker 1: then gave the house to your brother, and and in 605 00:36:26,000 --> 00:36:29,919 Speaker 1: the will he gave it specifically to your brother. Yes, 606 00:36:31,440 --> 00:36:35,600 Speaker 1: have you ever, dude, I'm have you ever had like 607 00:36:35,680 --> 00:36:37,759 Speaker 1: a lawyer help you out with this kind of ship? 608 00:36:38,400 --> 00:36:41,800 Speaker 5: With the not I have not looked to lawyers, okay, 609 00:36:42,880 --> 00:36:45,960 Speaker 5: but this conversation is starting to think that I need one. 610 00:36:46,520 --> 00:36:52,799 Speaker 1: Mm hmm, I bro, I think here's the thing. 611 00:36:52,840 --> 00:36:53,200 Speaker 3: I'm down. 612 00:36:53,480 --> 00:36:56,840 Speaker 1: I'm totally I'm totally down to uh talk with you 613 00:36:57,080 --> 00:36:59,959 Speaker 1: for a little bit more about this. But you absolutely 614 00:37:00,280 --> 00:37:02,239 Speaker 1: should go talk to a lawyer because your brother, don't. 615 00:37:02,280 --> 00:37:05,480 Speaker 1: Your brother could be doing some kind of like shady 616 00:37:05,560 --> 00:37:08,360 Speaker 1: ship where like maybe your dad actually left both of it. 617 00:37:08,400 --> 00:37:10,919 Speaker 1: Because if your dad left you ship and your brother 618 00:37:11,080 --> 00:37:13,200 Speaker 1: is just like if he's aultphaing you around the house 619 00:37:13,239 --> 00:37:16,720 Speaker 1: and hitting you and ship, you know, it wouldn't wouldn't 620 00:37:16,719 --> 00:37:20,760 Speaker 1: It wouldn't be beyond me that he's, you know, taking 621 00:37:20,840 --> 00:37:23,920 Speaker 1: ownership over this house that you know a percentage of 622 00:37:24,040 --> 00:37:26,759 Speaker 1: could rightfully belong to you. Would You just didn't have 623 00:37:26,920 --> 00:37:29,239 Speaker 1: the resources to figure that ship out? And I feel 624 00:37:29,280 --> 00:37:30,719 Speaker 1: for you. I know that getting a lawyer as a 625 00:37:30,800 --> 00:37:37,200 Speaker 1: whole expensive thing. All right, So you pay your money 626 00:37:38,760 --> 00:37:41,759 Speaker 1: and you're paying or you're paying rent to your brother. 627 00:37:43,640 --> 00:37:47,239 Speaker 5: Yes, I'm paying to help out the mortgage. And it's 628 00:37:48,360 --> 00:37:50,960 Speaker 5: also like power and whatnot, and none of it is 629 00:37:51,360 --> 00:37:53,560 Speaker 5: I pay, no. 630 00:37:53,960 --> 00:37:55,759 Speaker 4: That I know of. None of it is in my name. 631 00:37:58,520 --> 00:38:01,560 Speaker 5: But like I obviously I wasn't going to be here forever. 632 00:38:01,800 --> 00:38:03,840 Speaker 5: I just thought for the meantime. But it's been you know, 633 00:38:03,880 --> 00:38:05,120 Speaker 5: a year and six months now. 634 00:38:05,320 --> 00:38:08,719 Speaker 1: So where do you work for you? What's your job? 635 00:38:08,760 --> 00:38:10,880 Speaker 1: What's your job? Uh? 636 00:38:11,200 --> 00:38:11,600 Speaker 4: Plumbing? 637 00:38:11,920 --> 00:38:14,480 Speaker 5: We go around, you know, people call in, you know, 638 00:38:14,600 --> 00:38:18,719 Speaker 5: having trouble with leeks and whatnot, and uh, oh shit, 639 00:38:18,800 --> 00:38:19,360 Speaker 5: what time is it? 640 00:38:19,600 --> 00:38:22,640 Speaker 1: M's do you have to go right now? 641 00:38:24,160 --> 00:38:25,879 Speaker 5: I don't have to go to work. I have dinner 642 00:38:25,960 --> 00:38:28,239 Speaker 5: reservations with a friend of mine that I haven't seen 643 00:38:28,280 --> 00:38:31,080 Speaker 5: in a long time, and now that I think we've 644 00:38:31,120 --> 00:38:32,759 Speaker 5: had this talk, I might bring this up with them. 645 00:38:33,680 --> 00:38:36,319 Speaker 1: Yeah, you should talk to people. I have a lot 646 00:38:36,360 --> 00:38:38,800 Speaker 1: of questions for you. But let's okay, So, are you 647 00:38:38,880 --> 00:38:40,480 Speaker 1: making decent money being a plumber? 648 00:38:42,280 --> 00:38:46,560 Speaker 5: I'm it could be better, but like it's not the worst. 649 00:38:46,920 --> 00:38:50,160 Speaker 4: So like, okay, I'm okay, I'm making it. 650 00:38:50,239 --> 00:38:53,360 Speaker 1: Okay, all right, because you have something, because Brownie and 651 00:38:53,440 --> 00:38:57,359 Speaker 1: I have all that. Bro like, get the fuck out 652 00:38:57,400 --> 00:39:01,600 Speaker 1: of that place first, when my brother sounds like he's 653 00:39:01,760 --> 00:39:03,799 Speaker 1: just making life hell for you. And if you can 654 00:39:03,880 --> 00:39:08,040 Speaker 1: afford it, go, you know, get get with a roommate 655 00:39:08,280 --> 00:39:11,040 Speaker 1: or if you can afford a fucking studio or one. 656 00:39:11,160 --> 00:39:12,600 Speaker 1: I don't know where you live at or what you 657 00:39:12,680 --> 00:39:15,200 Speaker 1: make or any of that stuff, but like, yeah, try 658 00:39:15,239 --> 00:39:20,520 Speaker 1: to get a different housing situation. And then like, I mean, hey, 659 00:39:20,600 --> 00:39:25,359 Speaker 1: you probably have you should talk dude. Can I ask 660 00:39:25,400 --> 00:39:28,040 Speaker 1: you a question, why haven't you talked to anybody besides 661 00:39:28,080 --> 00:39:28,560 Speaker 1: me about this? 662 00:39:31,680 --> 00:39:38,360 Speaker 5: Honestly, it's more of a pride thing, like, and I 663 00:39:38,440 --> 00:39:40,719 Speaker 5: also just never had really been. 664 00:39:40,680 --> 00:39:43,239 Speaker 4: Excusing it for a while at the same time too, so. 665 00:39:45,040 --> 00:39:46,960 Speaker 1: And after after I gotta go. 666 00:39:47,320 --> 00:39:49,480 Speaker 4: I'm gonna be late here in about fifteen minutes. 667 00:39:49,880 --> 00:39:52,200 Speaker 1: You gotta go. Wait, you don't, can't. You don't want 668 00:39:52,200 --> 00:39:54,400 Speaker 1: to fish this conversation. It's okay if you got to 669 00:39:54,440 --> 00:39:54,920 Speaker 1: fucking do it. 670 00:39:55,440 --> 00:39:57,200 Speaker 5: I really want to do I've been waiting here like 671 00:39:57,280 --> 00:39:59,359 Speaker 5: forty five minutes, but I I don't want to miss 672 00:39:59,400 --> 00:40:03,480 Speaker 5: his dinner at all. Right, Well, but I do want 673 00:40:03,520 --> 00:40:05,840 Speaker 5: to say thank you, man, I I really appreciate this, 674 00:40:05,960 --> 00:40:07,080 Speaker 5: and it's really talking to you. 675 00:40:08,160 --> 00:40:11,520 Speaker 1: Swallow your pride. Go talk to a lawyer, talk to 676 00:40:11,600 --> 00:40:14,279 Speaker 1: your friends. Don't don't be don't don't don't feel a 677 00:40:14,320 --> 00:40:16,440 Speaker 1: need to be prideful about this man like you're getting 678 00:40:16,960 --> 00:40:18,719 Speaker 1: you're getting fucked over, and you're a nice guy and 679 00:40:18,719 --> 00:40:20,399 Speaker 1: you don't deserve that. And so you should go talk 680 00:40:20,440 --> 00:40:23,040 Speaker 1: to a lawyer and and everything you just told me. 681 00:40:23,160 --> 00:40:24,719 Speaker 1: Go tell him and see what they can do for you. 682 00:40:26,600 --> 00:40:29,600 Speaker 5: All Right, I'll do that, man. I'm gonna I'm gonna eat. 683 00:40:29,680 --> 00:40:31,239 Speaker 5: I'm gonna eat the shit out of this dinner for you. 684 00:40:31,400 --> 00:40:34,080 Speaker 1: Man, all right, go eat the shit out of some dinner. Okay, Bye, Matthew, 685 00:40:35,000 --> 00:40:38,879 Speaker 1: all right, dude, have a good night, you too. Damn 686 00:40:38,920 --> 00:40:41,320 Speaker 1: that poor fucking guy. I hope he talks to I 687 00:40:41,360 --> 00:40:44,920 Speaker 1: don't know this is some ship where, like you know, 688 00:40:45,160 --> 00:40:47,520 Speaker 1: he I'm I'm too stupid to know what his options 689 00:40:47,560 --> 00:40:51,880 Speaker 1: are in that, but almost certainly sounds like his brother 690 00:40:52,280 --> 00:40:57,759 Speaker 1: is doing some shady ship with the will. And even 691 00:40:57,840 --> 00:41:00,520 Speaker 1: if he's not, even even if the dad was like 692 00:41:00,680 --> 00:41:03,359 Speaker 1: I give everything to the brother, he still got He's 693 00:41:03,360 --> 00:41:06,040 Speaker 1: still definitely got some case against this guy if he's 694 00:41:06,200 --> 00:41:10,359 Speaker 1: you know, fucking assaulting him and all that shit. 695 00:41:10,840 --> 00:41:13,319 Speaker 5: So uh. 696 00:41:14,800 --> 00:41:16,320 Speaker 1: Damn, I wish you could have talked for longer. I 697 00:41:16,360 --> 00:41:21,359 Speaker 1: have so many more questions, But ma'am, I hope. I mean, 698 00:41:21,400 --> 00:41:23,080 Speaker 1: if I was the first person that he talked to 699 00:41:23,160 --> 00:41:26,239 Speaker 1: about this thing, I hope that it inspired him to 700 00:41:27,000 --> 00:41:30,640 Speaker 1: talk to other people about it, because like that's the thing, right, 701 00:41:30,719 --> 00:41:32,879 Speaker 1: Sometimes you don't because he didn't. I don't even because 702 00:41:32,920 --> 00:41:35,200 Speaker 1: a when he mentioned pride, it was like, hey, he's 703 00:41:35,200 --> 00:41:37,560 Speaker 1: feeling prideful about it, and be It's like he might 704 00:41:37,680 --> 00:41:41,040 Speaker 1: not even because he's not getting feedback from other people. 705 00:41:41,120 --> 00:41:44,759 Speaker 1: He might not even be aware that, you know, things 706 00:41:44,760 --> 00:41:47,359 Speaker 1: are fucked up. So hopefully he talks to his friend 707 00:41:47,440 --> 00:41:51,120 Speaker 1: over dinner and it gives him a bigger perspective on this. 708 00:41:51,960 --> 00:41:54,920 Speaker 1: But thanks for calling, Matthew, and good luck to you. Hello, folks, 709 00:41:55,000 --> 00:41:55,880 Speaker 1: it is me Lyle. 710 00:41:56,400 --> 00:41:56,440 Speaker 5: So. 711 00:41:56,760 --> 00:41:59,520 Speaker 1: About a month ago, I was invited to do two 712 00:41:59,719 --> 00:42:05,840 Speaker 1: live shows at the Electric Forest Music Festival in Rothbury, Michigan, 713 00:42:06,239 --> 00:42:07,880 Speaker 1: and it was a lot of fun. And while I 714 00:42:08,080 --> 00:42:14,320 Speaker 1: was there, I did some street interviews on the festival grounds. 715 00:42:14,400 --> 00:42:16,520 Speaker 1: I talked to a lot of people, and I'm ending 716 00:42:16,600 --> 00:42:21,200 Speaker 1: the podcast today by playing a little clip from those 717 00:42:21,280 --> 00:42:24,880 Speaker 1: street interviews. It's an interview that I did with this 718 00:42:25,239 --> 00:42:30,520 Speaker 1: girl who is basically like trying to figure out how 719 00:42:30,560 --> 00:42:37,400 Speaker 1: to be a human being having regular conversations with other people, 720 00:42:38,320 --> 00:42:41,759 Speaker 1: which is something that you know, I even struggle with 721 00:42:42,080 --> 00:42:44,200 Speaker 1: a lot. I know that my whole job is having 722 00:42:44,280 --> 00:42:46,320 Speaker 1: conversations with people, but that's just when I'm in a 723 00:42:46,360 --> 00:42:49,960 Speaker 1: Gecko costume. You know, when I'm in real life and 724 00:42:50,000 --> 00:42:51,719 Speaker 1: I'm at a store or something and I got to 725 00:42:51,760 --> 00:42:54,400 Speaker 1: talk to someone, it's a whole different thing. But anyway, 726 00:42:54,480 --> 00:42:56,680 Speaker 1: this isn't about me, and I'm only recording this so 727 00:42:56,800 --> 00:43:02,600 Speaker 1: that you guys aren't confused. Once once normal non cell 728 00:43:02,680 --> 00:43:08,799 Speaker 1: phone people are talking. I hate introducing calls and interviews 729 00:43:08,920 --> 00:43:11,960 Speaker 1: because it's like just let's just listen to the thing 730 00:43:12,040 --> 00:43:16,080 Speaker 1: and it'll introduce itself. But anyway, I'll shut up and 731 00:43:16,520 --> 00:43:20,080 Speaker 1: let us transport ourselves. You guys are gonna like this interview. 732 00:43:20,160 --> 00:43:21,960 Speaker 1: This is I had a lot of This was a 733 00:43:22,000 --> 00:43:24,600 Speaker 1: good one. This was a good one. You should listen 734 00:43:24,680 --> 00:43:27,719 Speaker 1: to it. Don't just stop listening because it's not a 735 00:43:27,800 --> 00:43:31,920 Speaker 1: phone call. Sometimes you gotta listen, you gotta all right, 736 00:43:32,320 --> 00:43:38,560 Speaker 1: let's transport ourselves to the Electric Forest Music Festival in Rothbury, Michigan. 737 00:43:39,960 --> 00:43:41,319 Speaker 1: Right now, what is your name? 738 00:43:41,520 --> 00:43:42,240 Speaker 6: My name is Zoey. 739 00:43:42,440 --> 00:43:44,839 Speaker 1: Zoey. Nice to me, Joe. How is the life? How's 740 00:43:44,880 --> 00:43:47,760 Speaker 1: the human experience treating you? And give it to me straight? 741 00:43:47,840 --> 00:43:51,120 Speaker 6: Okay, Well it's it's difficult. 742 00:43:51,440 --> 00:43:52,560 Speaker 1: Okay, Why is it difficult? 743 00:43:54,680 --> 00:43:57,680 Speaker 6: I feel fundamentally different from a lot of people. 744 00:43:57,960 --> 00:43:58,560 Speaker 1: Okay, how so. 745 00:44:00,080 --> 00:44:01,759 Speaker 6: I feel like other people just fit in a lot 746 00:44:01,800 --> 00:44:02,560 Speaker 6: easier than I do. 747 00:44:03,120 --> 00:44:06,520 Speaker 1: M fit it? What is fit in even me? 748 00:44:08,200 --> 00:44:10,480 Speaker 6: I guess we accepted by like general public? 749 00:44:11,280 --> 00:44:14,239 Speaker 1: You feel not accepted by the general Yeah? What aspects 750 00:44:14,480 --> 00:44:17,880 Speaker 1: of you do you feel are not being accepted by 751 00:44:17,880 --> 00:44:18,600 Speaker 1: the general public? 752 00:44:18,719 --> 00:44:20,719 Speaker 6: I guess just socially, I feel like I interact a 753 00:44:20,760 --> 00:44:24,480 Speaker 6: lot differently than a lot of people do. I don't 754 00:44:24,560 --> 00:44:29,280 Speaker 6: know really what it is, but it feels. 755 00:44:31,280 --> 00:44:31,600 Speaker 1: I don't know. 756 00:44:31,800 --> 00:44:33,840 Speaker 6: I don't know how to describe it. It just it 757 00:44:33,960 --> 00:44:39,759 Speaker 6: just feels different and it always has and I don't 758 00:44:39,880 --> 00:44:41,680 Speaker 6: I don't know how to articulate it. 759 00:44:44,440 --> 00:44:45,800 Speaker 1: Do you have a lot of friends or family? 760 00:44:46,280 --> 00:44:48,920 Speaker 6: I do have a bit. I have a very big family, 761 00:44:49,480 --> 00:44:50,840 Speaker 6: but I don't have very many friends. 762 00:44:51,200 --> 00:44:52,320 Speaker 1: Did you come here by yourself? 763 00:44:52,560 --> 00:44:52,600 Speaker 5: No? 764 00:44:52,800 --> 00:44:56,759 Speaker 6: No, no, no, I'm with my boyfriend and oh well 765 00:44:56,800 --> 00:44:59,240 Speaker 6: he left, but I'm with my boyfriend and his friends. 766 00:45:00,520 --> 00:45:04,200 Speaker 1: You feel unaccepted, do you? That's very saying. Do you 767 00:45:05,600 --> 00:45:08,759 Speaker 1: have a desire to fit in or do you at 768 00:45:08,800 --> 00:45:10,759 Speaker 1: this moment like yourself as you are? 769 00:45:11,000 --> 00:45:11,040 Speaker 5: No? 770 00:45:11,200 --> 00:45:14,239 Speaker 6: I do like myself. I just wish other people liked 771 00:45:14,320 --> 00:45:15,360 Speaker 6: me for who I was. 772 00:45:16,560 --> 00:45:19,600 Speaker 1: But it seems as though, I mean, your boyfriend just 773 00:45:19,719 --> 00:45:21,719 Speaker 1: case seems like a sweet guy just came over, gave 774 00:45:21,800 --> 00:45:24,320 Speaker 1: you a kiss, and he obviously likes you for exactly 775 00:45:24,400 --> 00:45:28,480 Speaker 1: who you are. And so you have fundamental proof out 776 00:45:28,480 --> 00:45:30,839 Speaker 1: there in the world that there are people out there 777 00:45:30,880 --> 00:45:33,080 Speaker 1: who will accept you as you are. And not only 778 00:45:33,120 --> 00:45:35,840 Speaker 1: will they accept you as you are, they will actually 779 00:45:36,160 --> 00:45:39,880 Speaker 1: like you even more than they would you know, anyone 780 00:45:39,920 --> 00:45:43,920 Speaker 1: who might traditionally fit in, they might like you for 781 00:45:44,960 --> 00:45:48,839 Speaker 1: the reasons that you so what some, as you say, 782 00:45:48,960 --> 00:45:52,600 Speaker 1: do not fit in right, which is like a beautiful thing. Yeah, 783 00:45:52,800 --> 00:45:52,960 Speaker 1: you know. 784 00:45:53,520 --> 00:45:56,560 Speaker 6: Yeah, the people that I have I'm very appreciative for. 785 00:45:56,920 --> 00:45:58,000 Speaker 1: How did you meet your boyfriend? 786 00:46:00,200 --> 00:46:03,560 Speaker 6: None of my work? Okay, I was working at a 787 00:46:03,600 --> 00:46:07,480 Speaker 6: restaurant and he came in for takeout, and really, yeah, 788 00:46:07,840 --> 00:46:09,880 Speaker 6: he thought I was cute, so we asked for my 789 00:46:10,000 --> 00:46:13,359 Speaker 6: number and I said sure because he didn't seem weird. 790 00:46:15,480 --> 00:46:18,440 Speaker 6: And that's it went from there. 791 00:46:19,200 --> 00:46:21,840 Speaker 1: You know, at least, like I don't know talking to 792 00:46:21,960 --> 00:46:26,759 Speaker 1: you in this situation, nothing about you has I mean 793 00:46:26,800 --> 00:46:28,719 Speaker 1: I've only known you for less than a minute, right, 794 00:46:28,960 --> 00:46:33,920 Speaker 1: but nothing about you has struck me as particularly off kilter. 795 00:46:35,600 --> 00:46:38,560 Speaker 6: I'm glad to hear that. I don't feel like I 796 00:46:38,680 --> 00:46:41,680 Speaker 6: am either. So it's strange to me that that I 797 00:46:41,960 --> 00:46:45,080 Speaker 6: have been rejected in so many like sectors of my line. 798 00:46:45,280 --> 00:46:48,440 Speaker 1: Genuine question, do you have as have you ever considered 799 00:46:48,480 --> 00:46:49,600 Speaker 1: that it might all be in your head? 800 00:46:50,680 --> 00:46:53,440 Speaker 6: I have it might it might be. 801 00:46:53,760 --> 00:46:56,319 Speaker 1: It could be you said, you've been rejected from many 802 00:46:56,360 --> 00:46:58,839 Speaker 1: different sectors. Yeah, in what senses? In what way? 803 00:46:58,960 --> 00:47:03,200 Speaker 6: So like even when I was like It could also 804 00:47:03,320 --> 00:47:05,560 Speaker 6: be that I moved around a lot when I was younger, 805 00:47:06,000 --> 00:47:10,160 Speaker 6: so I never formed like a steady friend group, which 806 00:47:10,200 --> 00:47:14,800 Speaker 6: I think a lot of people have, and so I 807 00:47:15,280 --> 00:47:18,440 Speaker 6: rotated through a lot of friend groups, and I learned 808 00:47:18,480 --> 00:47:24,239 Speaker 6: how people interact at a very young age. And not 809 00:47:24,360 --> 00:47:27,360 Speaker 6: that there's anything wrong with being like looking out for yourself, 810 00:47:27,880 --> 00:47:30,840 Speaker 6: but most people are very and I don't want to 811 00:47:31,000 --> 00:47:33,600 Speaker 6: this isn't a bad thing, but most people are looking 812 00:47:33,640 --> 00:47:35,759 Speaker 6: out for themselves, yeah, than they are for other people, 813 00:47:37,000 --> 00:47:41,440 Speaker 6: And I am the opposite. I want everybody around me 814 00:47:42,040 --> 00:47:45,040 Speaker 6: to be comfortable and to look out. I want to 815 00:47:45,080 --> 00:47:47,279 Speaker 6: look out for everybody else. I want everybody else to 816 00:47:48,480 --> 00:47:50,440 Speaker 6: be safe and to be comfortable and to be happy. 817 00:47:50,880 --> 00:47:53,480 Speaker 1: You know, it's funny that whole thing about everybody is 818 00:47:53,560 --> 00:47:56,320 Speaker 1: like looking out for themselves and selfish. You could interpret 819 00:47:56,360 --> 00:47:58,719 Speaker 1: that two different ways. You could interpret that negatively and 820 00:47:58,800 --> 00:48:01,480 Speaker 1: be like, oh, everyone's so selfish and what is this 821 00:48:01,560 --> 00:48:03,000 Speaker 1: world to come to? Or you can interpret it like, 822 00:48:03,120 --> 00:48:05,880 Speaker 1: you know, oh, everybody only really cares about themselves, So 823 00:48:05,960 --> 00:48:08,319 Speaker 1: I can do whatever I want. It doesn't people who 824 00:48:08,719 --> 00:48:11,279 Speaker 1: It doesn't matter if people judge me or you know, 825 00:48:11,520 --> 00:48:14,799 Speaker 1: reject me or any of these things because I don't 826 00:48:15,040 --> 00:48:19,359 Speaker 1: really matter to them, So why who gives a shit 827 00:48:19,360 --> 00:48:21,880 Speaker 1: about them judging me or you know any of that 828 00:48:22,080 --> 00:48:22,520 Speaker 1: kind of thing. 829 00:48:22,800 --> 00:48:24,839 Speaker 6: That's true. And I do flip flop between those two 830 00:48:25,000 --> 00:48:29,000 Speaker 6: like ideas perspectives. Yeah, So like on days when I 831 00:48:29,120 --> 00:48:31,399 Speaker 6: have I tend to have a lot of negative self talk. 832 00:48:31,840 --> 00:48:33,879 Speaker 6: So on days when I have that negative self talk, 833 00:48:33,920 --> 00:48:36,759 Speaker 6: it's like, oh, like everybody's just terrible, and like why 834 00:48:36,880 --> 00:48:39,120 Speaker 6: why can't anybody care for me the way I would 835 00:48:39,120 --> 00:48:42,879 Speaker 6: care for somebody else? And then I realized, like, if 836 00:48:43,760 --> 00:48:45,520 Speaker 6: they don't care about me in the same way that 837 00:48:45,600 --> 00:48:49,320 Speaker 6: I care about them, then why am I putting myself 838 00:48:49,520 --> 00:48:53,799 Speaker 6: out on the level of that like emotional energy if 839 00:48:53,840 --> 00:48:56,959 Speaker 6: they don't care about it? So it's not even worth 840 00:48:57,239 --> 00:48:59,839 Speaker 6: the worry and the anxiety and the sad. 841 00:49:01,520 --> 00:49:07,960 Speaker 1: Absolutely m hmm. Do you what's your dream in life? Hopeful? Life? 842 00:49:08,200 --> 00:49:08,480 Speaker 5: Is to. 843 00:49:11,120 --> 00:49:13,480 Speaker 6: Help other people not feel the way that I have felt. 844 00:49:16,200 --> 00:49:18,839 Speaker 1: And with your friends, like the friends that you came 845 00:49:18,920 --> 00:49:21,160 Speaker 1: here with and your boyfriends, you feel like you're doing that. 846 00:49:21,960 --> 00:49:24,160 Speaker 6: I try to. I'm not a perfect person and I 847 00:49:24,200 --> 00:49:25,320 Speaker 6: definitely make mistakes. 848 00:49:25,800 --> 00:49:26,840 Speaker 1: Yeah, and. 849 00:49:29,080 --> 00:49:31,839 Speaker 6: I've done a lot of work on myself to try 850 00:49:32,000 --> 00:49:34,600 Speaker 6: to be the best person that I can be, not 851 00:49:34,719 --> 00:49:37,840 Speaker 6: only for myself but for the people around me, because 852 00:49:37,920 --> 00:49:41,320 Speaker 6: as I improve, my relationships with everybody around me improves. 853 00:49:41,600 --> 00:49:44,680 Speaker 1: Right. See, that's it's just the thing thing you just said, right, 854 00:49:44,719 --> 00:49:47,920 Speaker 1: because you said that you're you're oriented to make sure 855 00:49:47,920 --> 00:49:50,319 Speaker 1: that everybody else is okay, to make sure. But then 856 00:49:50,360 --> 00:49:52,239 Speaker 1: also what you just said was you were like, when 857 00:49:52,239 --> 00:49:54,879 Speaker 1: I focus on myself and I improve myself, it does 858 00:49:54,960 --> 00:49:57,000 Speaker 1: have a positive impact on other people as well. 859 00:49:57,120 --> 00:49:59,640 Speaker 6: Yeah, And and I've also realized, like as I go 860 00:49:59,760 --> 00:50:03,319 Speaker 6: through life that the people, like, as I improve, if 861 00:50:03,400 --> 00:50:08,120 Speaker 6: the people that I thought were my friends or you know, 862 00:50:08,280 --> 00:50:10,839 Speaker 6: close to me start to pull back a little bit, 863 00:50:11,400 --> 00:50:14,200 Speaker 6: then those people weren't really there for me to begin with. Yeah, 864 00:50:14,320 --> 00:50:17,120 Speaker 6: and it's hard for me to accept, and I think 865 00:50:17,160 --> 00:50:22,719 Speaker 6: that's probably hard for anybody to accept, but in a 866 00:50:22,840 --> 00:50:25,480 Speaker 6: strange way, it does offer me a sense of comfort, like, well, 867 00:50:26,000 --> 00:50:30,120 Speaker 6: then they can go find people who who fit better 868 00:50:30,160 --> 00:50:32,080 Speaker 6: in their lives than I do, and I can find 869 00:50:32,120 --> 00:50:34,360 Speaker 6: better who I can find people who fit better in 870 00:50:34,440 --> 00:50:34,880 Speaker 6: my life. 871 00:50:35,320 --> 00:50:37,160 Speaker 1: It seems like you have a very healthy perspective on 872 00:50:37,200 --> 00:50:37,839 Speaker 1: all these things. 873 00:50:38,040 --> 00:50:40,440 Speaker 6: I tried to. It took a long time to get 874 00:50:40,440 --> 00:50:40,919 Speaker 6: to that point. 875 00:50:41,080 --> 00:50:43,759 Speaker 1: Yeah. I have a lot of negative self talk too. 876 00:50:43,880 --> 00:50:47,760 Speaker 1: I'm trying to push it out, and it's stoked. 877 00:50:48,160 --> 00:50:52,040 Speaker 6: It's hard, it's hard to combat, especially like for me, 878 00:50:52,239 --> 00:50:56,440 Speaker 6: I tend to like ruminate on thoughts and it's so 879 00:50:56,960 --> 00:50:59,759 Speaker 6: easy to find that like one negative thing and just 880 00:50:59,840 --> 00:51:00,960 Speaker 6: like focus. 881 00:51:00,760 --> 00:51:03,839 Speaker 1: On it for for days, right, right, right, But it's 882 00:51:03,840 --> 00:51:07,680 Speaker 1: in your control, right, yeah, always so I fucking uh, 883 00:51:08,560 --> 00:51:11,920 Speaker 1: that's why I forget all the time. Yeah, so all right, 884 00:51:12,040 --> 00:51:15,279 Speaker 1: for the rest of this weekend, well you wouldn't meet. 885 00:51:15,320 --> 00:51:19,080 Speaker 1: We'll try to focus on the positive things. 886 00:51:19,280 --> 00:51:20,360 Speaker 6: I agree. I agree. 887 00:51:20,560 --> 00:51:21,399 Speaker 1: What is your name again? 888 00:51:21,520 --> 00:51:22,120 Speaker 6: My name is Zoe. 889 00:51:22,360 --> 00:51:22,520 Speaker 4: Zoe. 890 00:51:22,680 --> 00:51:23,840 Speaker 1: Is there anything else you want to say to the 891 00:51:23,920 --> 00:51:25,239 Speaker 1: people of the computer before we go? 892 00:51:25,719 --> 00:51:26,000 Speaker 2: Sure? 893 00:51:27,040 --> 00:51:31,320 Speaker 6: I would like to say that I think everybody should 894 00:51:31,440 --> 00:51:35,680 Speaker 6: focus not on themselves in like a selfish way, because 895 00:51:35,719 --> 00:51:40,040 Speaker 6: focusing on yourself is an inherently selfish But if you 896 00:51:40,120 --> 00:51:43,120 Speaker 6: see areas of your life that you you don't appreciate 897 00:51:44,040 --> 00:51:46,880 Speaker 6: or maybe aren't working very well for you, you you 898 00:51:47,040 --> 00:51:51,160 Speaker 6: can control that and you you can fix that, and 899 00:51:51,320 --> 00:51:53,239 Speaker 6: how you do that is up to you. But but 900 00:51:53,400 --> 00:51:56,080 Speaker 6: if you don't like something you're you can fix that. 901 00:51:56,440 --> 00:52:00,319 Speaker 6: It's not a personality trait. It's not inherent to who 902 00:52:00,480 --> 00:52:03,040 Speaker 6: you are as a human. 903 00:52:04,960 --> 00:52:08,960 Speaker 1: If you don't like it, change it and eat cool 904 00:52:09,040 --> 00:52:12,239 Speaker 1: ranch doritos. They told me to say that. Okay, nice 905 00:52:12,239 --> 00:52:16,600 Speaker 1: to meet you. Hey, folks, it's Lyle again. If you 906 00:52:16,840 --> 00:52:19,759 Speaker 1: enjoyed that little interview and you want to hear all 907 00:52:19,880 --> 00:52:22,960 Speaker 1: of the interviews that I did at Electricforest, you can 908 00:52:23,040 --> 00:52:26,839 Speaker 1: go to YouTube dot com slash Lyele forever and look 909 00:52:26,920 --> 00:52:30,920 Speaker 1: for being a Gecko at Electric Forest, or you can 910 00:52:31,120 --> 00:52:34,200 Speaker 1: just find the link in the episode description. All right, 911 00:52:34,560 --> 00:52:39,480 Speaker 1: thanks God bless you. Goes on the line taking your 912 00:52:39,640 --> 00:52:40,879 Speaker 1: phone calls every night. 913 00:52:42,160 --> 00:52:47,000 Speaker 6: Goes's teaching you cloud in your life is not really 914 00:52:47,200 --> 00:52:47,920 Speaker 6: an expert.