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Speaker 1: Ah ah, hello, oh hello, ah ah.

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Speaker 2: I just want to welcome to listen and say no

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Speaker 2: hundred thousand ills on.

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Speaker 3: The front and the plunks.

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Speaker 4: I just want to look up at the only Yay,

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Speaker 4: welcome back. It's good Mom's bad choices. I'm Erica and

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Speaker 4: I'm Mela. Happy Wednesday. Hope everyone's having a good week

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Speaker 4: so far. That you are setting goals making them happen.

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Speaker 3: I'm getting high, you're smoking.

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Speaker 5: That's best.

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Speaker 3: Wat It's always way, Yeah, it is, really, you know.

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Speaker 4: It's a good way to reward yourself for hard, hard, hard,

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Speaker 4: hard day.

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Speaker 3: Had, especially being mom's. Yeah. Wow, that was really sad. Anyway,

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Speaker 3: we're joining by a special guest.

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Speaker 4: We're joined by a special guest, my friend Natasha. I've

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Speaker 4: known her. Yes, thank you for coming you.

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Speaker 3: I've known you for a long time now, actually like

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Speaker 3: four years, no, as long as I has been born

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Speaker 3: number four yea, Oh my god. So Natasha hit me

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Speaker 3: up on and was like, or did you go through Nisha?

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Speaker 5: No?

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Speaker 3: I think I just said to you damn. And I

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Speaker 3: was like, can I just be like Henda your belly?

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Speaker 3: Can we collab? I was like nine months pregnant, Am

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Speaker 3: I having your belly? Was like sure, fuck it.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, and then she feels like. I was like, do

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Speaker 5: we do you have a photographer in mind? And she's like, yeah,

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Speaker 5: I have one nishe you like? And then you is

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Speaker 5: that hot?

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Speaker 3: Did I introduce you that?

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Speaker 5: You guys? Yeah? It was you for god, Yeah, it

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Speaker 5: wasn't my choice and photographer was yours because now.

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Speaker 3: Right right right, speaking of Hannah, she does Hannah. She

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Speaker 3: does a lot of things. She's going to Hannah and smoke.

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Speaker 6: And interview all that's the same time because she's fucking amazing.

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Speaker 3: Just regular life. But and she's also a mama. She's

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Speaker 3: a mom.

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Speaker 4: She's an advocate for marijuana, an advocate for PTSD, and

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Speaker 4: a business owner, entrepreneur, small business owner.

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Speaker 5: Let me beautiful, all things. Thank you, thank you, thank

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Speaker 5: you for having me. I'm really excited to be here.

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Speaker 2: Thank you.

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Speaker 3: We're excited to have you.

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Speaker 6: We are.

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Speaker 4: So you you're not You're originally from Seattle, right, born yeah,

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Speaker 4: bod In actually California. Oh you are, Okay, born to

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Speaker 4: Seattle when I was four, pretty much lived there in

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Speaker 4: my whole life, and then I moved here when I

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Speaker 4: was like twenty four, twenty five, twenty fifteen, and then

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Speaker 4: I just started working at a lash bar, but at

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Speaker 4: the same time, I was actually working at twenty four

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Speaker 4: Fitness from I always like to share this because women are.

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Speaker 5: Like, how do you get where you did? And just

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Speaker 5: to encourage people because it's not just all about social media.

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Speaker 5: I used to work really hard, so I was actually

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Speaker 5: working at twenty four Fitness after eleven PM to six am,

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Speaker 5: and then I went to a lash bar in the daytime,

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Speaker 5: and so I can still network in all of that.

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Speaker 3: And I was doing like part time modeling and acting

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Speaker 3: and I still do like when I can.

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Speaker 5: But I feel like Lashes and Henna is like my

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Speaker 5: love before.

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Speaker 3: Actually, yeah, I sometimes do commercials. It's fun.

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Speaker 5: When I have to have time for it, I'll do it.

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Speaker 5: But that's kind of how it all started. And it

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Speaker 5: was twenty fifteen and four years later Rewind I had

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Speaker 5: a baby girl. Her name's Amrita, and after having a

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Speaker 5: good amount of clientele, I didn't want to leave my

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Speaker 5: Shanti bar behind and I left it with a great technician.

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Speaker 5: And I'm living in Seattle currently for the past year

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Speaker 5: and a half and it's been good pretty much traveling

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Speaker 5: between both sides, both worlds, both worlds meaning Seattle and

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Speaker 5: lay for me and then just being a mom and

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Speaker 5: advocating for PTSD like you just mentioned for the last

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Speaker 5: year because it's really important to my heart due to

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Speaker 5: life incidences that has literally been thrown in front of me.

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Speaker 3: And then yeah it would work and all that.

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Speaker 6: Yeah. Sure, I just want to say that I really really,

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Speaker 6: really really love connecting and meeting with women.

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Speaker 3: That first one high so I'm like very in tune

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Speaker 3: with my inner woman. But it just centers using so

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Speaker 3: many ways my energy. I'm really into with my feelings

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Speaker 3: right now, and I need to say this. I need

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Speaker 3: to say that.

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Speaker 5: I do say it bites let not flow flow you know.

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Speaker 3: It makes you be like super honest, and.

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Speaker 5: Isn't it's nice organic California sungrown.

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Speaker 3: Yes, it makes again well yeah, and then it comes

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Speaker 3: in to sexy like packaging. It's a box.

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Speaker 5: I mean they have a few things and tubes too,

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Speaker 5: but I really like that it comes in a box.

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Speaker 5: And it's like saving said you see life earlier because

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Speaker 5: I was smoking these or yeah, he was smoking these and.

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Speaker 3: You can give that up happy day with smoking these,

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Speaker 3: and I was just telling him, I'm like this, this

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Speaker 3: is so detailed.

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Speaker 4: It has a little compartment for these matches, matches and

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Speaker 4: a little like what is that a ram or something?

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Speaker 3: A goat with a bull It looks like a bull

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Speaker 3: with it's a bull in a suit and shovel and

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Speaker 3: then a beautiful pre rolled joint.

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Speaker 5: And it's like they use all organic fertilizers and they

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Speaker 5: they sethentic like pesticide. Said there, it's so they're very

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Speaker 5: they're like very fair well paid their employees as well.

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Speaker 5: So yeah, it's a cool thing.

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Speaker 3: Back to my feelings. I'm sorry, Oh.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, sorry, but we went back to you.

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Speaker 3: Back here. I'm here with you.

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Speaker 6: You're saying, I like to be around women who like

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Speaker 6: hustle and are true to themselves and do what they

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Speaker 6: want to do, and that there's no limit where limitless.

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Speaker 6: As women, I think we so often feel like we

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Speaker 6: have to stay in one lane and we can only

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Speaker 6: do one thing, and it's like tabooed and be like

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Speaker 6: I'm doing this and this and I did this.

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Speaker 3: And I also do that, and I'm by coastal and

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Speaker 3: I'm going to do this because we can do it

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Speaker 3: all and you actually think it's not possible and actually.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, and you know there's a process and it's just

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Speaker 6: it's wonderful to be around hard working, successful women that

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Speaker 6: you know dwells into all aspects of their passions and

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Speaker 6: their creatives.

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Speaker 5: And I love that.

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Speaker 3: Thank you, and I love you and I love you too.

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Speaker 6: I love you.

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Speaker 3: You're one of those women. I love it.

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Speaker 5: Reflections all moms do. Like I said before, it's awesome

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Speaker 5: with moms together.

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Speaker 2: Moms.

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Speaker 4: I think it's real important that the company you keep

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Speaker 4: is so important to like mind you. Yeah, yeah, I'm

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Speaker 4: like the moment that I started being more conscious of

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Speaker 4: the people that I surrounded myself with, my things started

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Speaker 4: to change automatically for me.

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Speaker 3: You know, you're around people that aren't doing shit, but

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Speaker 3: you're doing ship. There's something there's that Oh my god,

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Speaker 3: did you think it was a ghost? Who is coming

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Speaker 3: in my fucking house? Erica, I forgot to tell you that.

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Speaker 4: I thought it.

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Speaker 3: I thought about it, very paranoid.

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Speaker 4: No, because Jamila doesn't he even knocking, And sometimes she'll

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Speaker 4: just bust in through my door and.

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Speaker 3: I'm just chilling. Imagine you can only bust in if

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Speaker 3: it's open. But still that's not the point.

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Speaker 4: You not.

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Speaker 3: You know I'm coming. I'm like, I'm serious. Someone I

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Speaker 3: know someone out there feeling. But it's not a burglar.

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Speaker 3: It's fairy safe. Look it is eight oh two nine

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Speaker 3: o two p. There we go high.

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Speaker 6: This is well, this is the thing about getting high.

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Speaker 6: I was saying stuff out loud in my head. You

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Speaker 6: just didn't hear me. Okay, okay, okay did we did?

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Speaker 5: We talk about feelings before interrupted to.

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Speaker 3: The feelings got out. They were out.

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Speaker 5: Well, you were Your cannabis is greats.

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Speaker 3: We can't remember saying at the moment.

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Speaker 5: Once it settles in, it's gonna.

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Speaker 3: We're talking about our feelings and talking about your feeling.

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Speaker 3: It's always good. It's a good combos. Arter, it's a

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Speaker 3: good combos I'm speaking of feelings. So you have a

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Speaker 3: how old is your daughter? She's too.

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Speaker 4: She has doesn't thinking. I'm thinking feelings tantrum. She hasn't

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Speaker 4: had she got into the tantrum phase yet because we

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Speaker 4: live and like this crazy like my head deep.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, she's definitely like memorized logos now. So we've gone

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Speaker 5: into the grocery store and she's like pulled out oreos

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Speaker 5: and threw them on the floor when I said no

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Speaker 5: oreos and then laid on the floor and and then

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Speaker 5: I said, you know, let me know when you're going.

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Speaker 3: Oh, so that's how you deal with them. Yeah, so

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Speaker 3: you're like, do you like just ignore her when she

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Speaker 3: goes through.

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Speaker 5: I'll stand there with her. I can't just walk away. No, no,

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Speaker 5: But I'm just saying, like everyone has totally some people,

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Speaker 5: you know. I mean sometimes depending on how bad it is,

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Speaker 5: and if like it's more than five minutes or three minutes, yeah,

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Speaker 5: I'll put away the oreos and just pick her up

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Speaker 5: and say, you know later, or you have to eat

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Speaker 5: dinner or pizza, and then you get cookie and she'll

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Speaker 5: agree to it.

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Speaker 3: So it's nice. She's still in that cute like, yeah,

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Speaker 3: small phase. You know, they don't know. And she's like

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Speaker 3: the more bigger they get, the more annoying.

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Speaker 5: Yeah. The older they get, they know that they can't know.

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Speaker 5: They don't have to negotiate. When they're two, they're like,

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Speaker 5: all right, I'll eat my dinner.

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Speaker 4: And then you're performing full sentences and screaming at you

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Speaker 4: and that's important and it's like you know better, and

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Speaker 4: that's why I'm more angry.

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Speaker 3: And they're absorbing things just at a much faster past

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Speaker 3: in our generation.

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Speaker 6: It's the scariest part. It's all the absorption of information

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Speaker 6: so quickly, the memory, you know what? Speaking of that,

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Speaker 6: we're spoking weed right now.

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Speaker 5: And I actually was talking to my twelve year old

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Speaker 5: niece and she she actually just had surgery on scolia,

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Speaker 5: so so she's just sitting at home for the past

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Speaker 5: six weeks. But she actually told me that in school,

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Speaker 5: and these are twelve year olds, they're bringing vape pins

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Speaker 5: to school and it shocks me, and I feel like

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Speaker 5: it's very important to talk about these things. Where are

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Speaker 5: they getting them from? Why aren't parents checking in on them?

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Speaker 5: Like I'm thirty years old and I'm not. First, I

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Speaker 5: was annoyed obviously before it became a mom but I'm

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Speaker 5: very happy that my parents actually FaceTime me and look

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Speaker 5: behind my walls to see where.

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Speaker 3: I am every day growing up. You know, I was like, why, oh,

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Speaker 3: do you guys care so much? But I'm glad that

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Speaker 3: they do.

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Speaker 5: But I feel like they people should have controlled like

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Speaker 5: that about their on their kids right now too. I

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Speaker 5: know it sounds like too much, but if they're already smoky.

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Speaker 4: I just think that there's just it's hard to keep

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Speaker 4: it under control at this point because of social media.

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Speaker 5: But where are they getting fake pens from where do

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Speaker 5: we get out fake pens? But at twelve years old

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Speaker 5: in sochol now and well, and they're they're hitting it

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Speaker 5: in school like they're hitting the vakee pens and elementary

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Speaker 5: and going into they're selling in school like and she's like,

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Speaker 5: I've never.

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Speaker 3: You know, I've never done it, but.

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Speaker 6: I know I don't know.

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Speaker 5: Even actually right, you know, they sell them on Amazon

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Speaker 5: and kids are picking it up thinking that it's something

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Speaker 5: good for them.

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Speaker 3: It's really not really kids you're.

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Speaker 7: Listening but a you're talking about vapens as in like

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Speaker 7: THC they fake cell I pretty maybe it's like and

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Speaker 7: they were like, I'm pretty sure someone says that they

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Speaker 7: bought something because said it was tea with THHC but

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Speaker 7: obviously probably got removed later.

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Speaker 5: It's like, literally, by I remember that, you cannot you

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Speaker 5: can pick that out if it wasn't really you can

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Speaker 5: literally maybe it was on you know, on eBay or

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Speaker 5: something like that. But I think one of a cousin

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Speaker 5: of mine and I had to educate him too. He's

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Speaker 5: fifteen offline.

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Speaker 3: And you don't do that. You can't speaking of this topic.

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Speaker 5: Can't.

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Speaker 6: What was your introductory to marijuana as a teenager for you,

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Speaker 6: or a teenager or a child. And then also, how

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Speaker 6: do you intend or if you already have introduced your

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Speaker 6: daughter to I do smoke around her? What's your parenting like?

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Speaker 6: How do you what do you call our episode Moms

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Speaker 6: to Medicaid? We're moms in Medicaid? So yeah, and I

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Speaker 6: always want to know how what was your introductory and

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Speaker 6: how do you how do you plan on introducing it

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Speaker 6: to your daughter?

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Speaker 5: Well, she's two, so she doesn't really know what it

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Speaker 5: is right now, but she definitely sees mongo outside and

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Speaker 5: come back inside.

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Speaker 3: She doesn't know what she's doing.

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Speaker 5: She just knows that she's colaughing on the other side

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Speaker 5: of the door, and she sometimes mocks me when I

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Speaker 5: get back. But of course when she gets older, I'll

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Speaker 5: educate her that it's my medicine. And she's already knows

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Speaker 5: the scent of it. That's what I've smelt like for

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Speaker 5: the past year, you know, so's I don't think it's

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Speaker 5: going to be anything new to her. And thankfully in

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Speaker 5: our generation, it is something that talked about more, and

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Speaker 5: there's more education coming back, there's coming out by coming back,

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Speaker 5: and more research coming out, and so I think it's

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Speaker 5: going to be better for us. And I started. Yeah,

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Speaker 5: I think you asked me when did I started? It

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Speaker 5: wasn't my teenage years. It was actually age of like

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Speaker 5: twenty one, twenty two. It was later in my adult life,

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Speaker 5: and it was actually after trying pharmacutical drugs first.

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Speaker 3: Okay, And I did at least four years of counseling.

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Speaker 5: I again, something I like to always share because it's

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Speaker 5: not all about smoking weed. Definitely get like mental health

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Speaker 5: and talk about it and share what's actually happening in

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Speaker 5: your life so you don't think you're going crazy. But

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Speaker 5: it's nice to know that my psychiatrist is okay with

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Speaker 5: micro do siting on weed and letting me walk away

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Speaker 5: after four years knowing that I was going to be

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Speaker 5: okay and right, Yeah, it's been like a journey.

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Speaker 4: Can can you share like what you're like, what what

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Speaker 4: specifically in your life? You know put you onto this

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Speaker 4: journey of trying to I guess medicate or trying to

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Speaker 4: deal with the PTSD that you've experienced.

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Speaker 3: In your life.

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Speaker 5: So when when I was younger, I the four years

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Speaker 5: of counseling that I originally just mentioned to you. I

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Speaker 5: did that because I was actually sexually abused when I

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Speaker 5: was younger, and I for the longest time, I never

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Speaker 5: obviously wanted to share it with anyone, But I finally

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Speaker 5: shared it with my parents at the age of twenty five, and.

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Speaker 3: I worked through it with a psychiatrist. But it was

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Speaker 3: like it was just weird.

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Speaker 5: After my second appointment, it was a it was a

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Speaker 5: talk and a prescription handed to me. It was lithium,

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Speaker 5: it was addirll, it was curcher lean, it was limicked,

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Speaker 5: all all of these different things that they think that

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Speaker 5: was going to magically clear me. But it was really

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Speaker 5: just experiences that I needed to talk about and understand,

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Speaker 5: like what happened to me that was most important. At

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Speaker 5: least that's what I I thought it was. And after

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Speaker 5: taking it for a few years, I just didn't feel

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Speaker 5: like myself, Like I definitely had thoughts of suicide and

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Speaker 5: attempted almost once even and I knew that it wasn't.

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Speaker 3: Right for me, and slowly I, oh, while you're on

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Speaker 3: those medicines. Yeah, while I was on them. And this

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Speaker 3: was at the age of like twenty one, twenty two.

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Speaker 5: Mind you, I'm really happy that I went into a

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Speaker 5: psychiatrist to begin with, because I was I was in

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Speaker 5: college at the time, and I was like working a

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Speaker 5: full time job. As soon as I got out of college,

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Speaker 5: I went right into Make of America, trying to follow

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Speaker 5: my mom's footsteps and working a very full time adult job.

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Speaker 5: And I thought I was losing my mind. But it

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Speaker 5: was really all the things that I didn't deal with

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Speaker 5: when I was younger, and I was questioning, like why

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Speaker 5: did this happen to me? These things are not normal.

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Speaker 5: It's affecting my sex life even like and you know,

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Speaker 5: as an adult, and like why is this happening?

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Speaker 4: You know?

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Speaker 5: So I went in for help, and I'm glad I went.

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Speaker 5: But the experience with medications did not work for me.

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Speaker 5: So I slowly went off and drift, like drifted off

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Speaker 5: of it and tried cannabis because of one of my

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Speaker 5: cousins said it was working for her, and if it

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Speaker 5: worked for her, I thought, maybe it will work for me.

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Speaker 5: And I feel like it changed my life, like all

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Speaker 5: of a sudden, I was doing better in school. I

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Speaker 5: went through cosmetology school, got my license with flying Colors.

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Speaker 3: I mean, I started a business like just from scratch

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Speaker 3: and it's doing.

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Speaker 5: Great, and I mean, I feel like it's what you

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Speaker 5: want to make of it, And it's not always a

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Speaker 5: bad thing if you don't abuse it, or if you

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Speaker 5: can actually get shit done, it can be for you.

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Speaker 3: I mean, if you smoked me pass out, it's not

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Speaker 3: for you, you know, or if you're not doing things

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Speaker 3: or you you know.

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Speaker 5: And a lot of people turn off from weed because

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Speaker 5: they smoke one strain and it doesn't help them, it's

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Speaker 5: not for their body.

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Speaker 3: Like how long did it take to find the strain?

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Speaker 5: A while? Like, I mean a few months. And I

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Speaker 5: describe it to women as looking for the right birth control.

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Speaker 5: How many times have you tried several different birth controls?

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Speaker 5: So what makes you think just one strain of cannabis

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Speaker 5: is going to work for you? And I'm not saying

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Speaker 5: with mental health these pills don't work for people, but

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Speaker 5: for me it did it. For some people, they also

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Speaker 5: have to go through a bunch of different times, so

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Speaker 5: why do you not do that with cannabis too? So

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Speaker 5: I mean, over time, I've learned like sativa is for

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Speaker 5: days that I'm just like really really low and I need,

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Speaker 5: you know, an energetic lift for days that I need

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Speaker 5: to still create and show up to work and be happy.

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Speaker 3: But if I have like anxiety or I'm stressed out.

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Speaker 5: I don't do that. I'll choose like a hybrid or

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Speaker 5: an indica to just calm my energy. Or I do

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Speaker 5: very low dosages of edibles. Now. I started off with

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Speaker 5: like two point five milligrams and like five milligrams and

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Speaker 5: the highest I can personally go with ten milligrams. And

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Speaker 5: I did that just personally on my own and trying it.

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Speaker 5: But some people just have a ten milligram and they're

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Speaker 5: like throwing up and they're seeing shit and okay, and

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Speaker 5: it's not in its processes differently through your link.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, I was telling her into edibles when I eat

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Speaker 4: edibles as no matter what does Yeah, it's not an

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Speaker 4: oblind I feel like.

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Speaker 3: I was direct quote was first time that she would try.

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Speaker 3: I felt like my eyes are shaking. It was like,

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Speaker 3: what was your first experience of cannabis? Both of yours cannabis.

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Speaker 3: My first experience with cannibal smoking or smoking.

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Speaker 6: I was.

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Speaker 4: Thirteen, and I'm pretty sure it was like I don't

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Speaker 4: even know if it was really weird. Honestly, looking back

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Speaker 4: on it, it's quite questionable, but I know I didn't

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Speaker 4: get high, and I bought it and then I got

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00:18:23,680 --> 00:18:25,960
Speaker 4: I was in my friend's backyard, or I was by

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Speaker 4: an abandoned pool of the house.

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Speaker 3: Now that I'm thinking about it, that's very strange. Then

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Speaker 3: we went back and smoked in her guest house.

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Speaker 4: Shout out to Dylan Octagon. Then I left the weed

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Speaker 4: of my pocket. My mom found it the next day.

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Speaker 4: So the first time I smoked, I also got caught,

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Speaker 4: yelled at, cried, she cried, I got yelled at.

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Speaker 5: My dad.

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Speaker 4: Maybe I was even younger. Actually I thought I was

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Speaker 4: like twelve, actually around twelve. But I knew that she

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Speaker 4: was smoking. I knew like I or I would see

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Speaker 4: like things I thought I had.

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Speaker 3: Your mom smokes, Yes, I love, I need to meet

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Speaker 3: your mom.

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Speaker 1: Love.

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00:19:06,640 --> 00:19:10,199
Speaker 3: Yes, I mean she's not like a heavy smoker by

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Speaker 3: any means. Like she she's like she takes one hit

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Speaker 3: and she's like, ooh, you know good though that she's

394
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Speaker 3: open to it. Yeah, but she wasn't open to her

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Speaker 3: daughter doing it, you know.

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Speaker 4: And I get it because I have a kid now too,

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Speaker 4: and I'm like, but I have a different perspective now

398
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Speaker 4: just because I think because it just doesn't seem fair.

399
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Speaker 4: It doesn't seem fair that I can smoke and then

400
00:19:29,440 --> 00:19:33,159
Speaker 4: I have an issue when you smoke. Let's talk about it.

401
00:19:33,280 --> 00:19:35,240
Speaker 4: Let's talk about why you feel like you want to smoke.

402
00:19:35,320 --> 00:19:37,520
Speaker 4: Is it because you think because I smoke, that's why

403
00:19:37,560 --> 00:19:38,160
Speaker 4: you want to smoke?

404
00:19:38,280 --> 00:19:43,600
Speaker 3: Yeah? So yeah, that's my story. What's your story?

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Speaker 6: Bol I honestly can't really remember, probably because I smoked

406
00:19:49,880 --> 00:19:52,760
Speaker 6: too much. I don't really remember. I remember being like twelve.

407
00:19:52,880 --> 00:19:55,720
Speaker 6: I remember I'm thirteen. I did a lot of such

408
00:19:55,760 --> 00:19:59,040
Speaker 6: shit as is preteen and a teenager, so I was

409
00:19:59,080 --> 00:20:03,400
Speaker 6: always experience life. Yeah, like I was drinking and like eleven,

410
00:20:03,480 --> 00:20:05,480
Speaker 6: I think twelve, we went to like tried to sneak

411
00:20:05,480 --> 00:20:09,360
Speaker 6: across the street from this YMC a dance and smoke weed.

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Speaker 3: But I don't even know if I really got high.

413
00:20:11,200 --> 00:20:15,159
Speaker 6: I wasn't really like a pot smoker, even like in

414
00:20:15,280 --> 00:20:17,960
Speaker 6: high school, I was super happy. I can remember like

415
00:20:17,960 --> 00:20:20,280
Speaker 6: a couple of times I got really high in high school.

416
00:20:20,320 --> 00:20:23,679
Speaker 6: But I started really like smoking smoking in college when

417
00:20:23,680 --> 00:20:25,439
Speaker 6: I moved to Atlanta, which is the most dumbest shit ever,

418
00:20:25,480 --> 00:20:29,720
Speaker 6: because I was smoking fucking stress like called Reggie in Atlantic.

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Speaker 5: Oh.

420
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Speaker 3: I was literally about to say when she said she

421
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Speaker 3: wasn't sure what it was.

422
00:20:33,520 --> 00:20:35,639
Speaker 5: Have you heard her. Have you heard or seen the

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00:20:35,720 --> 00:20:36,320
Speaker 5: video Reggie?

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00:20:36,720 --> 00:20:38,720
Speaker 3: Though? The video you know what I'm talking about.

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00:20:39,000 --> 00:20:41,680
Speaker 5: It's called Reggie. Oh, you can YouTube it. Okay.

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Speaker 3: What are you talking about except actual weed?

427
00:20:44,600 --> 00:20:46,800
Speaker 5: Oh? Oh my gosh. Actually there's a type of weed

428
00:20:46,800 --> 00:20:48,840
Speaker 5: that's called Reggie. It's supposed to be horrific. It's called

429
00:20:48,920 --> 00:20:53,680
Speaker 5: it's short for like regular. Okay, yes for us, Yes, yes,

430
00:20:53,760 --> 00:20:57,040
Speaker 5: that's exactly what it dressed stress. Remember that there's a

431
00:20:57,119 --> 00:21:00,320
Speaker 5: funny YouTube video that's clowning on weed that's sposed to

432
00:21:00,640 --> 00:21:02,200
Speaker 5: be called Reggie. Was supposed to be the worst weed

433
00:21:02,240 --> 00:21:06,640
Speaker 5: on the market because it's like, okay, because I don't

434
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Speaker 5: have access.

435
00:21:07,359 --> 00:21:07,760
Speaker 3: So it's like.

436
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Speaker 6: I went to college to smoke fuck ass weed for

437
00:21:13,160 --> 00:21:15,760
Speaker 6: like a year and then I started getting smoking better weed,

438
00:21:15,920 --> 00:21:18,720
Speaker 6: and then later and I was just like dead forever.

439
00:21:19,359 --> 00:21:20,919
Speaker 6: And then I started to realize, like, oh, I need

440
00:21:21,040 --> 00:21:23,760
Speaker 6: to pay attention to what I'm smoking or else I

441
00:21:23,840 --> 00:21:27,760
Speaker 6: can be totally paranoid, totally useless, or I could be

442
00:21:27,840 --> 00:21:31,119
Speaker 6: functioning now as a mom. Now is like as I've

443
00:21:31,200 --> 00:21:34,360
Speaker 6: moved back, and there's like education. I worked at dispensary

444
00:21:34,400 --> 00:21:36,160
Speaker 6: for a little while, like you know, on the side,

445
00:21:36,160 --> 00:21:38,879
Speaker 6: and shit like oh, you know, this is what I

446
00:21:38,960 --> 00:21:39,639
Speaker 6: need to be smoking.

447
00:21:39,720 --> 00:21:42,720
Speaker 3: This is what I need ups. But yeah, that's pretty

448
00:21:42,800 --> 00:21:42,960
Speaker 3: much it.

449
00:21:43,040 --> 00:21:45,000
Speaker 6: But you know, when my parents always smoked with they

450
00:21:45,000 --> 00:21:47,000
Speaker 6: weren't open with me about it until high school. My

451
00:21:47,080 --> 00:21:49,280
Speaker 6: grandmother smokes weed, but I didn't know that until I

452
00:21:49,359 --> 00:21:52,160
Speaker 6: became an adult. But it comes from a long weed

453
00:21:52,240 --> 00:21:55,440
Speaker 6: smoking background. And now I can smoke with like my dad.

454
00:21:55,359 --> 00:21:59,720
Speaker 3: And my grandma together and it's great. It's amazing, you know,

455
00:22:00,040 --> 00:22:02,600
Speaker 3: and it's my love. I almost got along with my grandmother.

456
00:22:03,040 --> 00:22:03,640
Speaker 6: You better.

457
00:22:04,240 --> 00:22:08,080
Speaker 3: How old is your grandma? During Christmas or Thanksgiving? Jimmila

458
00:22:08,200 --> 00:22:10,680
Speaker 3: was on her. It's the story like smoking a blut

459
00:22:10,720 --> 00:22:13,159
Speaker 3: with her grandma in the background. I love dancing. My

460
00:22:13,280 --> 00:22:14,639
Speaker 3: grandma was so cool.

461
00:22:14,800 --> 00:22:17,280
Speaker 5: Yeah, oh my, I'm still trying to get my grandma

462
00:22:17,320 --> 00:22:19,320
Speaker 5: to smoke me. So she's been smoking cigarettes since she

463
00:22:19,400 --> 00:22:21,679
Speaker 5: was fifteen years old. And I've taken her to her

464
00:22:21,720 --> 00:22:23,760
Speaker 5: like doctor's appointments and things like that. Her lungs it's

465
00:22:23,800 --> 00:22:27,040
Speaker 5: like untouched. What it's She's in such good health. The

466
00:22:27,119 --> 00:22:28,879
Speaker 5: doctor has like come back every six months. And for

467
00:22:29,000 --> 00:22:31,520
Speaker 5: some people, yes, it works this way, but most people

468
00:22:31,640 --> 00:22:36,359
Speaker 5: tobacco kills, right, yeah, obviously, so I sometimes sit outside

469
00:22:36,400 --> 00:22:40,280
Speaker 5: and she's eighty and now she's okay with me sparking.

470
00:22:39,960 --> 00:22:42,840
Speaker 3: Up my joint and she's smoking her oh my god cigarettes,

471
00:22:42,840 --> 00:22:45,720
Speaker 3: and it's it just took it like a nine months,

472
00:22:45,920 --> 00:22:46,080
Speaker 3: you know.

473
00:22:46,200 --> 00:22:48,160
Speaker 5: And of course I cried about it afterwards the first

474
00:22:48,240 --> 00:22:50,200
Speaker 5: time it happens, because it's just't oh my god. I

475
00:22:50,280 --> 00:22:54,359
Speaker 5: never thought about it, honestly, being like an Indian woman too, Honestly,

476
00:22:54,400 --> 00:22:56,479
Speaker 5: I never thought the first time I did it, though,

477
00:22:56,520 --> 00:22:59,080
Speaker 5: she was like, oh hi did, like oh my god.

478
00:22:59,119 --> 00:23:01,719
Speaker 3: In Hindi like what are you doing? And like how

479
00:23:01,760 --> 00:23:06,000
Speaker 3: do your feed How did you introduce your like this

480
00:23:06,160 --> 00:23:06,720
Speaker 3: to my parents?

481
00:23:08,359 --> 00:23:10,359
Speaker 5: So when we moved back to California, like I was mentioning,

482
00:23:10,400 --> 00:23:12,240
Speaker 5: after starting my shantyore, I took off because I had

483
00:23:12,240 --> 00:23:14,600
Speaker 5: a baby and I moved back and I was hiding

484
00:23:14,640 --> 00:23:17,239
Speaker 5: it for the first month. And I feel like, if

485
00:23:17,280 --> 00:23:19,560
Speaker 5: you have anxiety and if you have PTSD and you're

486
00:23:19,760 --> 00:23:22,879
Speaker 5: using this, you're not going to help yourself. If you're

487
00:23:22,960 --> 00:23:26,040
Speaker 5: hiding it, you're actually creating more anxiety. And it's so

488
00:23:26,200 --> 00:23:27,679
Speaker 5: bad because I as soon as I would walk out

489
00:23:27,680 --> 00:23:29,320
Speaker 5: of my house after I would smoke weed, I would

490
00:23:29,440 --> 00:23:32,359
Speaker 5: be paranoid about my smell parentoid to talk to my

491
00:23:32,440 --> 00:23:36,040
Speaker 5: mom and I just got so like in my head

492
00:23:36,040 --> 00:23:37,720
Speaker 5: about it, and I'm like, why are you even overthinking

493
00:23:37,800 --> 00:23:40,280
Speaker 5: what you're doing? Even smoking for how many years? And

494
00:23:40,359 --> 00:23:41,760
Speaker 5: then I also didn't want to her to think that

495
00:23:41,760 --> 00:23:43,840
Speaker 5: it was my younger brother doing it. Come, you know,

496
00:23:43,920 --> 00:23:48,280
Speaker 5: being blamed for something. So a month later, oh, girl,

497
00:23:48,320 --> 00:23:50,680
Speaker 5: this was a year ago. Oh I've only been shit

498
00:23:51,480 --> 00:23:55,119
Speaker 5: a public cannabis evigate since November two thousand of last year.

499
00:23:55,280 --> 00:23:57,719
Speaker 5: Oh okay, it's gone the year. And as soon as

500
00:23:57,760 --> 00:23:59,639
Speaker 5: I became open to my parents, and my mom and

501
00:23:59,720 --> 00:24:03,720
Speaker 5: dadd accepted, there's no fear behind it anymore. And it

502
00:24:03,800 --> 00:24:06,520
Speaker 5: was the best feeling in the world. And so after

503
00:24:06,560 --> 00:24:08,040
Speaker 5: a month, I walked down at seven block in the

504
00:24:08,080 --> 00:24:10,520
Speaker 5: morning and I looked at my mom and I said,

505
00:24:10,560 --> 00:24:12,879
Speaker 5: I was you know, you know I have PTSD through

506
00:24:13,040 --> 00:24:15,440
Speaker 5: what I've been through, and I'm going to be super

507
00:24:15,520 --> 00:24:19,560
Speaker 5: honest with you, and I use cannabis for medication and

508
00:24:19,680 --> 00:24:21,480
Speaker 5: I'm going to bring it out of my trunk and

509
00:24:21,560 --> 00:24:22,159
Speaker 5: show you what I do.

510
00:24:22,320 --> 00:24:23,560
Speaker 3: And e't seven o'clock in the morning.

511
00:24:24,280 --> 00:24:27,159
Speaker 5: I just woke up and I'm like, I need you know,

512
00:24:27,240 --> 00:24:29,000
Speaker 5: I have my coffee and I have two hits of

513
00:24:29,040 --> 00:24:30,600
Speaker 5: weed and that's how I start my day and it's

514
00:24:30,640 --> 00:24:33,160
Speaker 5: okay and it works for me. And so I brought

515
00:24:33,560 --> 00:24:35,600
Speaker 5: in the weed and I grinded it in front of

516
00:24:35,640 --> 00:24:37,600
Speaker 5: her and it was this tiny nug and obviously it's

517
00:24:37,640 --> 00:24:40,280
Speaker 5: a plant, so I'm hoping that it's not something she's

518
00:24:40,280 --> 00:24:41,840
Speaker 5: going to freak out about. And she didn't freak out.

519
00:24:43,040 --> 00:24:45,160
Speaker 5: I walked outside and there's like a glass in between

520
00:24:45,280 --> 00:24:47,359
Speaker 5: us now because I shut the screen door behind us,

521
00:24:47,760 --> 00:24:50,280
Speaker 5: and I smoked twice in front of her and blew

522
00:24:50,359 --> 00:24:52,120
Speaker 5: it out and it was this tiny pipe that I used.

523
00:24:52,119 --> 00:24:53,840
Speaker 3: And I came back inside and.

524
00:24:53,920 --> 00:24:57,200
Speaker 5: The first thing she said in Hindi was the mykonzi

525
00:24:57,280 --> 00:25:03,480
Speaker 5: kais and that means who taught you, who talks to

526
00:25:03,480 --> 00:25:06,440
Speaker 5: you for your mom, like who influenced you to do this?

527
00:25:06,640 --> 00:25:09,760
Speaker 5: And I was just I started laughing, obviously, thinking.

528
00:25:09,840 --> 00:25:14,680
Speaker 3: That's what every mother says. I say, who targeting that?

529
00:25:15,280 --> 00:25:16,000
Speaker 4: And no.

530
00:25:16,200 --> 00:25:18,600
Speaker 5: One day, remember when I was doing counseling, and you know,

531
00:25:18,640 --> 00:25:20,840
Speaker 5: I told them, you know, I opened up about what

532
00:25:20,960 --> 00:25:23,080
Speaker 5: happened to me when I was younger. I've been doing

533
00:25:23,119 --> 00:25:25,040
Speaker 5: this too, to just help me live better. And it

534
00:25:25,119 --> 00:25:27,879
Speaker 5: makes me feel like myself again and just helps me.

535
00:25:28,000 --> 00:25:30,920
Speaker 5: And after that, it's like a week later. I told

536
00:25:30,960 --> 00:25:35,280
Speaker 5: my dad and that was hard because I cried through.

537
00:25:35,119 --> 00:25:38,200
Speaker 3: The whole thing for some reason. I don't know why,

538
00:25:38,480 --> 00:25:42,560
Speaker 3: but like being the only daughter, I thought I was

539
00:25:42,600 --> 00:25:43,680
Speaker 3: going to disappoint him.

540
00:25:43,720 --> 00:25:45,440
Speaker 5: But I came to a point in my life being

541
00:25:45,480 --> 00:25:48,200
Speaker 5: a mom that I wasn't going to hide myself anymore,

542
00:25:48,240 --> 00:25:51,880
Speaker 5: not for anyone, not for Amrita, not for my parents.

543
00:25:52,800 --> 00:25:55,600
Speaker 5: And I can't live like that anymore, especially, like I said,

544
00:25:55,920 --> 00:25:58,040
Speaker 5: after the incidences that I've gone through, it's too much

545
00:25:58,080 --> 00:26:00,159
Speaker 5: for me to do anything more. And I I was

546
00:26:00,240 --> 00:26:01,639
Speaker 5: very honest with him. I said, you know, Dad, if

547
00:26:01,680 --> 00:26:03,680
Speaker 5: you don't want this under your roof, that's okay. You know,

548
00:26:03,760 --> 00:26:05,280
Speaker 5: me and Rutha can live somewhere else. I'm not going

549
00:26:05,359 --> 00:26:07,560
Speaker 5: to take a Rutha away from you, but I don't

550
00:26:07,560 --> 00:26:09,359
Speaker 5: want to like disrespect you. But if you're okay with it,

551
00:26:09,680 --> 00:26:11,159
Speaker 5: you know, this is why I do it, and you

552
00:26:11,320 --> 00:26:13,080
Speaker 5: know why. And I just just like bawling through the

553
00:26:13,119 --> 00:26:14,680
Speaker 5: whole thing. And he said, if it helps you, and

554
00:26:14,720 --> 00:26:18,320
Speaker 5: if it's your medicine, it's okay. And that's what he said,

555
00:26:18,560 --> 00:26:21,440
Speaker 5: and I think he understands like where I'm coming from,

556
00:26:21,520 --> 00:26:23,000
Speaker 5: and like I said, as long as I'm getting my

557
00:26:23,000 --> 00:26:23,640
Speaker 5: shit done.

558
00:26:23,480 --> 00:26:25,760
Speaker 3: I think they're okay with it. And it took a

559
00:26:25,880 --> 00:26:26,960
Speaker 3: year afterwards.

560
00:26:27,040 --> 00:26:29,880
Speaker 5: You know, they had to see me all year long

561
00:26:29,960 --> 00:26:34,200
Speaker 5: after that, and sometimes they would like come in and

562
00:26:34,440 --> 00:26:36,840
Speaker 5: smell me and they're like, Natasha, and why are you

563
00:26:36,960 --> 00:26:38,560
Speaker 5: you know, are you sure you want to keep doing this?

564
00:26:38,640 --> 00:26:42,000
Speaker 5: You're a mom now. And you know, after a year later,

565
00:26:42,040 --> 00:26:44,960
Speaker 5: they're they're proud and they're they're get what I'm doing.

566
00:26:46,680 --> 00:26:49,240
Speaker 5: I think it was six months in my mom's bank manager.

567
00:26:49,800 --> 00:26:52,359
Speaker 5: One of them walked up to her and she follows

568
00:26:52,400 --> 00:26:54,000
Speaker 5: me on Instagram, and she saw what I was doing

569
00:26:54,040 --> 00:26:56,760
Speaker 5: and read a few of my articles and she was like, you.

570
00:26:56,760 --> 00:26:58,040
Speaker 3: Should be so proud of your daughter.

571
00:26:58,200 --> 00:27:00,119
Speaker 5: And she, you know, she was like, she's.

572
00:27:00,000 --> 00:27:02,400
Speaker 3: Doing so much. And my mom, I guess, didn't realize

573
00:27:02,520 --> 00:27:04,960
Speaker 3: what I was doing. She just like, why are you

574
00:27:05,040 --> 00:27:06,200
Speaker 3: smoking weed? Natasha?

575
00:27:06,280 --> 00:27:09,160
Speaker 5: No more smoking photos. I'm okay with you smoking cannabis.

576
00:27:09,200 --> 00:27:10,640
Speaker 5: It's not that, but why do you have to post

577
00:27:10,680 --> 00:27:12,760
Speaker 5: it on the internet. But I wasn't just posting it

578
00:27:12,880 --> 00:27:15,240
Speaker 5: on the internet. I'm trying to tell her that I'm

579
00:27:15,280 --> 00:27:17,200
Speaker 5: trying to break the stigma behind her culture and trying

580
00:27:17,240 --> 00:27:18,600
Speaker 5: to tell you that I can still be a regular

581
00:27:19,000 --> 00:27:21,560
Speaker 5: person and I'm still a mom. I could still work.

582
00:27:22,640 --> 00:27:25,440
Speaker 5: Yeah I'm not perfect. Yeah i still have severe symptoms

583
00:27:25,520 --> 00:27:28,399
Speaker 5: through PTSD, but I'm trying to use plants with repeals period.

584
00:27:28,640 --> 00:27:33,800
Speaker 3: Right And after hearing her bank manager story and what.

585
00:27:33,960 --> 00:27:37,720
Speaker 5: She said, I was literally bawling, like because like she

586
00:27:37,920 --> 00:27:41,160
Speaker 5: finally started to believe slowly.

587
00:27:40,960 --> 00:27:41,680
Speaker 3: What I was doing.

588
00:27:41,840 --> 00:27:44,479
Speaker 5: And now like a year later, she's like picking out

589
00:27:44,520 --> 00:27:47,960
Speaker 5: my Saudis for me. She's taking out my outfits for me,

590
00:27:48,040 --> 00:27:49,080
Speaker 5: and she's supporting me.

591
00:27:49,200 --> 00:27:52,080
Speaker 3: And so it was my dad too, but beautiful. So Mom,

592
00:27:52,280 --> 00:27:55,239
Speaker 3: you know, she's like, you know, parents' approval. As much

593
00:27:55,280 --> 00:27:57,800
Speaker 3: as we don't want it to be important, it's the

594
00:27:57,960 --> 00:28:00,720
Speaker 3: best gift it is. It's a gift, and if you

595
00:28:00,760 --> 00:28:01,160
Speaker 3: can give.

596
00:28:01,080 --> 00:28:03,119
Speaker 4: That to your kids, it's like one of the biggest

597
00:28:03,280 --> 00:28:06,640
Speaker 4: gifts you can give them because it's something they'll they're there.

598
00:28:06,840 --> 00:28:09,240
Speaker 3: They might not ask you for, you know what I mean, or.

599
00:28:11,560 --> 00:28:13,680
Speaker 5: Even if they killed someone, you know what I mean, Honestly,

600
00:28:13,840 --> 00:28:16,639
Speaker 5: like if they know you first or whatever it might be,

601
00:28:16,800 --> 00:28:19,880
Speaker 5: they just be okay with them coming to you create

602
00:28:19,960 --> 00:28:22,320
Speaker 5: that space that they're okay with having this conversation with you.

603
00:28:22,680 --> 00:28:25,600
Speaker 6: Right, Just that transparency and that honesty is important and

604
00:28:26,320 --> 00:28:27,920
Speaker 6: for the misty, you do it. And so they could

605
00:28:27,920 --> 00:28:28,760
Speaker 6: also do the same.

606
00:28:29,359 --> 00:28:29,720
Speaker 4: M hm.

607
00:28:30,600 --> 00:28:32,919
Speaker 3: So do they ever? Were they ever?

608
00:28:33,040 --> 00:28:34,680
Speaker 4: Were they concerned you said you had a little brother.

609
00:28:34,840 --> 00:28:36,520
Speaker 4: Were they concerned that you were going to pass on

610
00:28:36,760 --> 00:28:38,200
Speaker 4: this Reggie?

611
00:28:38,400 --> 00:28:40,960
Speaker 3: And does he smoke? Yes, his name's Reggie, and yes,

612
00:28:41,040 --> 00:28:42,120
Speaker 3: he totally names Reggie.

613
00:28:45,920 --> 00:28:49,840
Speaker 5: What Yes, And I'm like, he was actually one of

614
00:28:49,880 --> 00:28:53,200
Speaker 5: the articles that I've talked about before because he he's

615
00:28:53,920 --> 00:28:57,760
Speaker 5: one of the most traumatic incidents as I have and had,

616
00:28:58,000 --> 00:29:00,960
Speaker 5: and he did attempt to take his life. And he

617
00:29:01,200 --> 00:29:03,560
Speaker 5: definitely has been smoking in the evening. He said it

618
00:29:03,600 --> 00:29:05,000
Speaker 5: calms him down and stuff. But he didn't want to

619
00:29:05,000 --> 00:29:07,040
Speaker 5: do it in front of our parents because of respect.

620
00:29:07,720 --> 00:29:10,480
Speaker 5: And he was so happy after I did it because

621
00:29:10,520 --> 00:29:13,320
Speaker 5: everyone gets smoking at our house. Now it just doesn't matter.

622
00:29:13,480 --> 00:29:16,080
Speaker 5: And like a year later, honestly, none of my unties

623
00:29:16,080 --> 00:29:18,880
Speaker 5: care at this point. And of course at the beginning,

624
00:29:18,920 --> 00:29:21,959
Speaker 5: they're wondering, Natasha, why do you smell like this? Are

625
00:29:22,000 --> 00:29:22,560
Speaker 5: you high?

626
00:29:23,080 --> 00:29:23,240
Speaker 4: Right?

627
00:29:23,680 --> 00:29:26,120
Speaker 5: What's happening? But I had literally had to sit down

628
00:29:26,200 --> 00:29:29,760
Speaker 5: and tell them. People have fallen dead in front of me.

629
00:29:29,960 --> 00:29:33,960
Speaker 5: I can't explain to you why or how, but I

630
00:29:35,080 --> 00:29:38,040
Speaker 5: have severe PTSD and I can't control it, and I

631
00:29:38,160 --> 00:29:40,320
Speaker 5: do this instead of taking pills. And now that there's

632
00:29:40,360 --> 00:29:43,320
Speaker 5: more research, thank god, and there's so many men from

633
00:29:43,360 --> 00:29:46,000
Speaker 5: the military after coming back from war that are using it,

634
00:29:46,560 --> 00:29:49,280
Speaker 5: and again more and more research and doctors even vouching

635
00:29:49,360 --> 00:29:51,880
Speaker 5: for it. They're okay with it, but they wouldn't be

636
00:29:51,920 --> 00:29:53,760
Speaker 5: okay with it if they didn't hear it from like

637
00:29:54,000 --> 00:29:55,000
Speaker 5: a medical professional.

638
00:29:55,040 --> 00:29:55,880
Speaker 3: Honestly, I feel like.

639
00:29:56,640 --> 00:29:59,880
Speaker 4: I mean, I think, I mean just I remember looking

640
00:30:00,120 --> 00:30:04,400
Speaker 4: your Instagram multiple times and seeing like that you had

641
00:30:04,480 --> 00:30:08,480
Speaker 4: experienced one death after another and they were all like suicides,

642
00:30:09,040 --> 00:30:10,560
Speaker 4: and that is just like.

643
00:30:11,880 --> 00:30:13,400
Speaker 3: At some point for me, I'm like, I don't even

644
00:30:13,400 --> 00:30:15,720
Speaker 3: know what to say. I'm just like destroyed over again.

645
00:30:16,160 --> 00:30:18,040
Speaker 3: But like also I'm like, how does that?

646
00:30:18,760 --> 00:30:19,000
Speaker 5: Why?

647
00:30:20,080 --> 00:30:20,800
Speaker 3: What does it mean?

648
00:30:21,040 --> 00:30:23,840
Speaker 5: You asked me this on Instagram once and you said, like,

649
00:30:24,480 --> 00:30:25,880
Speaker 5: I hope you come to terms of it. I hope

650
00:30:25,880 --> 00:30:28,320
Speaker 5: it makes sense to you once And truthfully, I love

651
00:30:28,400 --> 00:30:29,760
Speaker 5: that you both are like spiritual women.

652
00:30:30,360 --> 00:30:32,000
Speaker 3: I probably I feel like I committed to a side

653
00:30:32,000 --> 00:30:32,600
Speaker 3: of my last life.

654
00:30:32,760 --> 00:30:35,600
Speaker 5: Hmmm, that's what it came down to, because I don't

655
00:30:35,680 --> 00:30:40,280
Speaker 5: understand how so many people can just literally fall dead

656
00:30:40,280 --> 00:30:43,040
Speaker 5: around me or in front of me, and it doesn't

657
00:30:43,080 --> 00:30:45,520
Speaker 5: make any sense, Like how many of my neighbors have

658
00:30:45,600 --> 00:30:46,440
Speaker 5: to like kill themselves?

659
00:30:47,040 --> 00:30:50,800
Speaker 6: How many neighbors? Hasn't really been three three neighbors. I'm

660
00:30:50,800 --> 00:30:53,920
Speaker 6: still in the same building different. I'm so happy that

661
00:30:54,040 --> 00:30:56,920
Speaker 6: you are like that, we're not. I'm not crazy when

662
00:30:56,920 --> 00:30:59,480
Speaker 6: I'm like, there has I think that's that's probably true.

663
00:30:59,560 --> 00:31:03,360
Speaker 5: That makes I don't saying anything else makes more sense

664
00:31:03,720 --> 00:31:07,800
Speaker 5: in my life. I after, like after it happened over

665
00:31:07,840 --> 00:31:11,400
Speaker 5: and over again, like the last one was nuts. Like

666
00:31:11,880 --> 00:31:14,240
Speaker 5: I'll do a short I'll do a short piece of

667
00:31:14,320 --> 00:31:17,400
Speaker 5: all of them, what has happened in a row. There

668
00:31:17,440 --> 00:31:19,800
Speaker 5: was an immediate family member that I'm not going to

669
00:31:19,800 --> 00:31:21,800
Speaker 5: share their story yet because they haven't been they haven't

670
00:31:21,840 --> 00:31:25,160
Speaker 5: given me permission to. But another immediate family member besides

671
00:31:25,200 --> 00:31:27,800
Speaker 5: my brother, attempted their life when I was younger and

672
00:31:28,360 --> 00:31:30,120
Speaker 5: it was like eight or nine, and that traumatized me

673
00:31:30,200 --> 00:31:30,640
Speaker 5: quite a bit.

674
00:31:30,920 --> 00:31:33,479
Speaker 3: Then it was my brother an uncle of mine did

675
00:31:33,560 --> 00:31:36,000
Speaker 3: pass away, and after that.

676
00:31:37,840 --> 00:31:41,680
Speaker 5: It became like really just weird, and I wanted to

677
00:31:41,760 --> 00:31:43,320
Speaker 5: get my brother out of Seattle, and so I moved

678
00:31:43,360 --> 00:31:45,080
Speaker 5: him out to Long Beach just to like help him

679
00:31:45,120 --> 00:31:48,160
Speaker 5: and just start over. And one day I was going

680
00:31:48,240 --> 00:31:50,760
Speaker 5: to work and I literally saw something fall from a

681
00:31:50,840 --> 00:31:54,000
Speaker 5: bridge in front of me. And I always joked around

682
00:31:54,040 --> 00:31:55,880
Speaker 5: with my friends living in California after a year and

683
00:31:55,920 --> 00:31:58,080
Speaker 5: I was like, oh, it's another luggage bag that someone

684
00:31:58,160 --> 00:32:00,440
Speaker 5: broke up with their boyfriend, you know, And it was

685
00:32:00,600 --> 00:32:02,600
Speaker 5: not as when I drove closer, it was a woman

686
00:32:02,720 --> 00:32:06,840
Speaker 5: laying there, and it sucked seeing her in that position.

687
00:32:06,920 --> 00:32:08,760
Speaker 5: She was actually alive, saying kill me. When I got

688
00:32:08,800 --> 00:32:12,280
Speaker 5: her and there was blood and bones everywhere. Oh yeah,

689
00:32:12,400 --> 00:32:14,960
Speaker 5: I got I parked my car immediately. Like I said

690
00:32:15,000 --> 00:32:18,080
Speaker 5: before I mentioned it. Actually working at twenty four Fitness,

691
00:32:18,080 --> 00:32:20,280
Speaker 5: I knew, I knew CPR, I knew I could help

692
00:32:20,360 --> 00:32:22,400
Speaker 5: this woman. So I ran up to her and try

693
00:32:22,440 --> 00:32:23,800
Speaker 5: to help her, and I stayed with her until the

694
00:32:23,840 --> 00:32:26,840
Speaker 5: paramedics alived. And I can't even recall all the things

695
00:32:26,840 --> 00:32:30,920
Speaker 5: that happened because it was so fucked and like, excuse

696
00:32:30,960 --> 00:32:34,800
Speaker 5: my language, it was just so traumatic. Like all I

697
00:32:34,920 --> 00:32:37,320
Speaker 5: remember is a police officer asking me for my ID

698
00:32:37,440 --> 00:32:40,320
Speaker 5: and I brought him my fucking passport and he was like,

699
00:32:41,360 --> 00:32:42,840
Speaker 5: I just want you to get off the freeway. I'm

700
00:32:42,880 --> 00:32:44,360
Speaker 5: going to stop these cars. I just want you to

701
00:32:44,440 --> 00:32:47,320
Speaker 5: get off the freeway. Cause I was like, so shicken up.

702
00:32:47,360 --> 00:32:48,960
Speaker 5: And after that happened, of course, I moved out a

703
00:32:49,000 --> 00:32:51,160
Speaker 5: long beach and I went to downtown LA and we

704
00:32:51,280 --> 00:32:53,320
Speaker 5: lived there for two years. And our first Father's Day

705
00:32:53,400 --> 00:32:56,280
Speaker 5: after having Amrita, I went to the grocery store to

706
00:32:56,280 --> 00:32:58,640
Speaker 5: get sweet potatoes. Came back and as soon as my

707
00:32:58,720 --> 00:33:03,240
Speaker 5: elevator door opened to the floor or my neighbors doorf

708
00:33:03,360 --> 00:33:06,240
Speaker 5: blasted over open and she lives like two doors down

709
00:33:06,360 --> 00:33:08,320
Speaker 5: and she's screaming, help me, help me. Of course, I

710
00:33:08,440 --> 00:33:10,960
Speaker 5: dropped my groceries and I ran in and she was

711
00:33:11,120 --> 00:33:13,040
Speaker 5: screaming like, oh my god, oh my god. And of

712
00:33:13,120 --> 00:33:14,880
Speaker 5: course I look over and I just see legs laying

713
00:33:14,920 --> 00:33:18,400
Speaker 5: on the floor. And I look over to her and

714
00:33:18,480 --> 00:33:22,120
Speaker 5: she says, I I think my my roommate committed suicide.

715
00:33:22,320 --> 00:33:25,640
Speaker 5: And I like, literally I couldn't explain to you how

716
00:33:25,800 --> 00:33:29,000
Speaker 5: mad I was that day. I literally took a second

717
00:33:29,080 --> 00:33:31,320
Speaker 5: from myself and I like looked up at the sky

718
00:33:31,400 --> 00:33:34,720
Speaker 5: and I was like, fuck you, again. Literally, okay, this

719
00:33:34,840 --> 00:33:37,560
Speaker 5: is another This is an assitement, really and I know

720
00:33:37,600 --> 00:33:39,360
Speaker 5: people are gonna think this is crazy, but I don't

721
00:33:39,960 --> 00:33:42,120
Speaker 5: think it's like a coincident in any way. So of

722
00:33:42,240 --> 00:33:44,400
Speaker 5: course I took the phone from her and I was like,

723
00:33:44,480 --> 00:33:48,320
Speaker 5: it's okay, just try to breathe through it. And the

724
00:33:48,760 --> 00:33:50,520
Speaker 5: you know, the guy on the phone is like is

725
00:33:50,600 --> 00:33:53,120
Speaker 5: he alive? As he did he was totally gone, and

726
00:33:53,520 --> 00:33:55,000
Speaker 5: you know, he was like, can you try to give

727
00:33:55,080 --> 00:33:58,000
Speaker 5: him CPR? And we you know, I ran and got

728
00:33:58,080 --> 00:34:00,480
Speaker 5: Amritha's father at the time, I mean not to time

729
00:34:00,520 --> 00:34:04,920
Speaker 5: over his father with his dad, and he came and

730
00:34:05,440 --> 00:34:07,600
Speaker 5: tried to give me CPR, like tried to help me

731
00:34:07,640 --> 00:34:08,239
Speaker 5: give him sleeper.

732
00:34:08,239 --> 00:34:10,960
Speaker 3: I'm getting like weird just talking about it. But that

733
00:34:11,200 --> 00:34:12,120
Speaker 3: was another incident.

734
00:34:12,239 --> 00:34:16,960
Speaker 5: And so moving out of there, by the way, what

735
00:34:17,160 --> 00:34:20,160
Speaker 5: California law does not allow you to move out because

736
00:34:20,200 --> 00:34:23,680
Speaker 5: of mental health if you're yeah, And I want to

737
00:34:23,800 --> 00:34:26,799
Speaker 5: mention that because it was so hard to move out

738
00:34:26,800 --> 00:34:28,839
Speaker 5: of there. And I told them over and over again,

739
00:34:28,880 --> 00:34:30,440
Speaker 5: like I cannot walk past the story anymore. But they

740
00:34:30,440 --> 00:34:32,160
Speaker 5: didn't want to break your lease. They will not let

741
00:34:32,200 --> 00:34:34,160
Speaker 5: you break your lease like that. It was the right

742
00:34:34,200 --> 00:34:35,919
Speaker 5: and proper way I said it, But yes they will.

743
00:34:35,960 --> 00:34:38,080
Speaker 5: They won't allow it. It's it's against the law to

744
00:34:38,160 --> 00:34:40,920
Speaker 5: do that. And the and we got out of there

745
00:34:41,000 --> 00:34:43,000
Speaker 5: the way that we got out of there, thankfully. But

746
00:34:43,920 --> 00:34:45,719
Speaker 5: I just want to say that, like California needs to

747
00:34:45,719 --> 00:34:48,439
Speaker 5: think about this, and all of them all across the board,

748
00:34:48,440 --> 00:34:51,920
Speaker 5: they think about mental health because it is serious. You

749
00:34:52,000 --> 00:34:55,920
Speaker 5: can't make someone do that every day and to experience that.

750
00:34:56,080 --> 00:34:58,799
Speaker 5: So I moved out of there and currently I'm living

751
00:34:58,840 --> 00:35:02,680
Speaker 5: with my parents in Seattle. And last Mother's Day, two

752
00:35:02,760 --> 00:35:06,080
Speaker 5: days before Mother's Day, our neighbor of seventeen years took.

753
00:35:05,960 --> 00:35:11,319
Speaker 3: Her life two days before Mother's Day and on Father's Day. Wow,

754
00:35:12,800 --> 00:35:15,560
Speaker 3: that's crazy, tell me about it.

755
00:35:16,480 --> 00:35:18,839
Speaker 5: I'm still living there right now and she's not there,

756
00:35:18,880 --> 00:35:22,840
Speaker 5: and like some mom of two daughters, and it doesn't

757
00:35:23,200 --> 00:35:24,840
Speaker 5: I don't know. You see them all every day and

758
00:35:24,920 --> 00:35:27,040
Speaker 5: you're like look at them straight in the face, and

759
00:35:27,120 --> 00:35:31,719
Speaker 5: you don't know what happened? Like, what what happened? And

760
00:35:31,760 --> 00:35:33,320
Speaker 5: then you hear it over and over again now in

761
00:35:33,360 --> 00:35:37,399
Speaker 5: our generation, because people are just not satisfied with life

762
00:35:37,480 --> 00:35:40,600
Speaker 5: where they're like their mental health is so disabled because

763
00:35:40,680 --> 00:35:42,440
Speaker 5: things are not as fast as they could order it

764
00:35:42,480 --> 00:35:43,600
Speaker 5: as on fucking Amazon.

765
00:35:44,120 --> 00:35:46,520
Speaker 3: You know, they think everything in life is supposed to

766
00:35:46,560 --> 00:35:48,640
Speaker 3: be that way, but it's not. It's it's really hard

767
00:35:48,680 --> 00:35:49,560
Speaker 3: to it's a journey.

768
00:35:49,960 --> 00:35:52,879
Speaker 5: Yes, thank you for turning on the heater.

769
00:35:54,880 --> 00:36:01,840
Speaker 3: I'm getting caught to you. I know you are, damn.

770
00:36:02,719 --> 00:36:05,560
Speaker 3: That's yeah. And it just it just keeps on going

771
00:36:05,600 --> 00:36:07,239
Speaker 3: on and on like in between that.

772
00:36:07,360 --> 00:36:10,840
Speaker 5: Honestly, I've seen a few other debts just laying in

773
00:36:10,960 --> 00:36:14,960
Speaker 5: the road covered with a blanket, yes, just under bridges,

774
00:36:15,080 --> 00:36:16,759
Speaker 5: and it didn't make sense to me why I kept

775
00:36:16,800 --> 00:36:19,200
Speaker 5: crossing it. But like you said in the beginning, why

776
00:36:19,200 --> 00:36:21,560
Speaker 5: do you think it happened? I honestly think I committed

777
00:36:21,560 --> 00:36:24,200
Speaker 5: suicide in my past life, and I'm just here to help.

778
00:36:24,400 --> 00:36:25,960
Speaker 3: And then this is your this is your role, this

779
00:36:26,080 --> 00:36:26,520
Speaker 3: is your doing.

780
00:36:26,600 --> 00:36:28,279
Speaker 5: All I'm supposed to do is just trying to help

781
00:36:28,320 --> 00:36:30,120
Speaker 5: people live longer and just let them know it's going

782
00:36:30,160 --> 00:36:30,640
Speaker 5: to be okay.

783
00:36:30,719 --> 00:36:32,040
Speaker 3: And that's and that's.

784
00:36:31,800 --> 00:36:35,520
Speaker 6: Amazing that you're like that you're aligning with your calling

785
00:36:35,640 --> 00:36:36,759
Speaker 6: and that you're recognizing that.

786
00:36:36,840 --> 00:36:39,719
Speaker 5: And I don't know what else to do, right the fuck,

787
00:36:39,920 --> 00:36:41,640
Speaker 5: I don't even know what else to do besides like

788
00:36:41,719 --> 00:36:43,960
Speaker 5: smokeyed and try to help. And again, it's not weed

789
00:36:44,000 --> 00:36:46,680
Speaker 5: that's going to solve all your problems. Go get counseling, right,

790
00:36:46,800 --> 00:36:48,440
Speaker 5: it's not all about smoking cannabis.

791
00:36:48,920 --> 00:36:51,960
Speaker 3: But are you I don't know what else to do? Right? Right?

792
00:36:52,120 --> 00:36:52,239
Speaker 5: Right?

793
00:36:52,680 --> 00:36:55,360
Speaker 3: Are you still currently in therapy?

794
00:36:56,440 --> 00:36:58,640
Speaker 5: I actually had like a good talk with one of

795
00:36:58,719 --> 00:37:02,160
Speaker 5: my clients and psychiatry, like just a few days ago actually,

796
00:37:02,480 --> 00:37:05,680
Speaker 5: and I'm going to go back to therapy. But she's

797
00:37:06,400 --> 00:37:09,399
Speaker 5: she gave me like really great feedback, and it's been

798
00:37:10,320 --> 00:37:13,120
Speaker 5: it's been nice to hear it from someone that's professional.

799
00:37:13,239 --> 00:37:15,360
Speaker 5: She works with a lot of trauma cases. And she

800
00:37:15,520 --> 00:37:19,439
Speaker 5: told me, I'm definitely half severe BTSD. Obviously, she doesn't

801
00:37:19,440 --> 00:37:22,160
Speaker 5: even know how I'm walking around, she doesn't know how

802
00:37:22,200 --> 00:37:25,840
Speaker 5: I'm functional sometimes because of it happening over and over again.

803
00:37:25,960 --> 00:37:29,160
Speaker 5: And she said, you're definitely at like a consistent state

804
00:37:29,239 --> 00:37:32,759
Speaker 5: of hyper vigilance. Is it fled and you're just that

805
00:37:32,920 --> 00:37:35,360
Speaker 5: means like you're at that shock stage of when it

806
00:37:35,560 --> 00:37:39,600
Speaker 5: happened all the time. And it's true, because I mean

807
00:37:39,640 --> 00:37:41,719
Speaker 5: I can't even take a nap without like my night guard.

808
00:37:41,840 --> 00:37:43,600
Speaker 5: I mean, I feel like I'm clutching my teeth Throughout

809
00:37:43,600 --> 00:37:46,719
Speaker 5: the day, I've broken like all of the teeth in

810
00:37:46,920 --> 00:37:49,560
Speaker 5: the back left side of my teeth because just you know,

811
00:37:49,680 --> 00:37:52,200
Speaker 5: at night, just grinding my teeth and my body still

812
00:37:52,320 --> 00:37:55,400
Speaker 5: is holding onto that. So, yes, cannabis is helping me.

813
00:37:55,880 --> 00:37:58,680
Speaker 5: But did it like take away everything for the rest

814
00:37:58,719 --> 00:37:59,160
Speaker 5: of my life?

815
00:37:59,360 --> 00:37:59,400
Speaker 4: No?

816
00:37:59,680 --> 00:38:01,399
Speaker 5: Is it how helping me through my day to day yes?

817
00:38:01,560 --> 00:38:04,680
Speaker 5: And having me a good mom yes, helping me work, yes.

818
00:38:04,600 --> 00:38:11,560
Speaker 3: But do you think that you'll ever be totally like free, No.

819
00:38:12,239 --> 00:38:14,560
Speaker 5: Because I can't even like have a normal dream at night,

820
00:38:14,640 --> 00:38:20,239
Speaker 5: I mean without smoking cannabis. Like, once I have no

821
00:38:20,440 --> 00:38:22,640
Speaker 5: nightmares at night, then I'm probably gonna have hope again.

822
00:38:23,440 --> 00:38:25,480
Speaker 5: But until that happens, I don't know.

823
00:38:25,880 --> 00:38:26,520
Speaker 3: I hope I do.

824
00:38:26,760 --> 00:38:28,160
Speaker 5: I don't feel like it's like the end of the

825
00:38:28,200 --> 00:38:30,400
Speaker 5: world either if I do have a nightmare, because I

826
00:38:30,520 --> 00:38:32,759
Speaker 5: know when I wake up as a nightmare. But of

827
00:38:32,920 --> 00:38:37,880
Speaker 5: course who wants to like the rest of Yeah, so slowly,

828
00:38:38,239 --> 00:38:40,840
Speaker 5: you know, as I'm sharing all of this, I'm hoping

829
00:38:41,120 --> 00:38:43,040
Speaker 5: I can learn and like share my process.

830
00:38:43,760 --> 00:38:45,799
Speaker 4: I was like, oh, I think talking about it too,

831
00:38:46,120 --> 00:38:48,600
Speaker 4: is I mean, for me, even just having a podcast,

832
00:38:48,920 --> 00:38:51,160
Speaker 4: it is therapeutic for me just talking about it, yes,

833
00:38:51,560 --> 00:38:53,880
Speaker 4: talking to other people that can relate to you too,

834
00:38:54,080 --> 00:38:56,560
Speaker 4: so you know you feel like you know, oh wow,

835
00:38:56,640 --> 00:38:58,480
Speaker 4: I'm not crazy because.

836
00:38:58,239 --> 00:39:01,239
Speaker 5: When you're in just talking about it on Instagram, it's

837
00:39:01,280 --> 00:39:06,560
Speaker 5: so cathartic, it's so amazing just talking about it, just

838
00:39:06,600 --> 00:39:07,279
Speaker 5: writing about it.

839
00:39:07,880 --> 00:39:11,680
Speaker 3: Okay, she's like she wanted to say something. I was like,

840
00:39:13,320 --> 00:39:14,040
Speaker 3: is it just a coffee?

841
00:39:19,239 --> 00:39:19,520
Speaker 6: Okay?

842
00:39:19,680 --> 00:39:22,040
Speaker 3: Did you guys just smoke too much food? No? No, no, no,

843
00:39:22,640 --> 00:39:26,160
Speaker 3: I can like this one up again though. Can you

844
00:39:26,200 --> 00:39:28,880
Speaker 3: ever be too high when when you're babyless?

845
00:39:28,960 --> 00:39:31,520
Speaker 5: And I mean I don't. Yeah, after a while you've

846
00:39:31,560 --> 00:39:33,040
Speaker 5: been smoking for a while too, do you feel like

847
00:39:33,080 --> 00:39:35,360
Speaker 5: you get high? Like you like effect you?

848
00:39:35,680 --> 00:39:35,879
Speaker 3: Yeah?

849
00:39:36,160 --> 00:39:36,719
Speaker 5: I think it does.

850
00:39:36,800 --> 00:39:39,160
Speaker 3: It affects me because again I don't. I don't chief

851
00:39:39,320 --> 00:39:41,960
Speaker 3: all day, Like sometimes I can puff that wake up.

852
00:39:42,080 --> 00:39:45,400
Speaker 3: Sometimes I'll have to, you know, sometimes midday's time. Sometimes

853
00:39:45,480 --> 00:39:46,359
Speaker 3: I just wat to the end of the day.

854
00:39:46,400 --> 00:39:48,320
Speaker 6: Sometimes the whole day will go by and I haven't smiled,

855
00:39:48,440 --> 00:39:51,280
Speaker 6: or two days will go by. I don't need it, Awesome,

856
00:39:51,719 --> 00:39:55,080
Speaker 6: sometimes I do need it, you know, so you know.

857
00:39:55,120 --> 00:39:55,480
Speaker 5: When you do?

858
00:39:55,719 --> 00:39:59,960
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, I mean I think sometimes I overdo it.

859
00:40:01,880 --> 00:40:05,359
Speaker 4: Really no, but I mean Obviously, I do not smoke

860
00:40:05,480 --> 00:40:07,080
Speaker 4: nearly as much as I used to before I had

861
00:40:07,200 --> 00:40:09,680
Speaker 4: a kid. And actually I think it's only been more

862
00:40:09,760 --> 00:40:12,320
Speaker 4: recently that I've smoked more because sometimes I go like

863
00:40:12,440 --> 00:40:14,759
Speaker 4: a week without smoking, two weeks without smoking.

864
00:40:14,760 --> 00:40:18,440
Speaker 5: Not two weeks, but a week maybe not too I

865
00:40:18,520 --> 00:40:23,799
Speaker 5: see you every week, and I love my Cannabis makes

866
00:40:23,840 --> 00:40:25,680
Speaker 5: me a better parent, honestly, you know.

867
00:40:25,960 --> 00:40:32,120
Speaker 3: Like I'm more engaged. And it's not that I not

868
00:40:32,280 --> 00:40:35,040
Speaker 3: be engaged without smoking, it's just when I'm not, and

869
00:40:35,120 --> 00:40:39,240
Speaker 3: I spell certainly I am, you know, more present, more present,

870
00:40:39,600 --> 00:40:44,319
Speaker 3: and exactly that's really what it is, being present. Yeah,

871
00:40:45,520 --> 00:40:46,279
Speaker 3: I seem I.

872
00:40:46,360 --> 00:40:49,719
Speaker 5: Feel like whenever I, you know, smoke and I'll go

873
00:40:49,800 --> 00:40:51,759
Speaker 5: back inside, Like I feel like I'm more of a

874
00:40:51,960 --> 00:40:52,600
Speaker 5: child with her.

875
00:40:56,320 --> 00:40:58,080
Speaker 3: You're down to play all the games.

876
00:40:58,160 --> 00:41:01,160
Speaker 5: Yes we can be like I read that and Natasha

877
00:41:01,280 --> 00:41:03,520
Speaker 5: with these dolls for the next four hours. It's gonna

878
00:41:03,520 --> 00:41:05,319
Speaker 5: be okay, you know what I mean, until you fall

879
00:41:05,400 --> 00:41:07,920
Speaker 5: asleep for your death whatever you want about four hours,

880
00:41:08,000 --> 00:41:13,040
Speaker 5: but like or you know, whatever are you. Sativa is

881
00:41:13,080 --> 00:41:16,239
Speaker 5: usually throughout the day, but my daughter doesn't not much,

882
00:41:16,360 --> 00:41:18,319
Speaker 5: So stay awake with her.

883
00:41:20,160 --> 00:41:23,840
Speaker 6: Because before we started recording, we were we were researching,

884
00:41:23,880 --> 00:41:27,239
Speaker 6: and we were saying, like, how in Hindu culture, wheat

885
00:41:27,360 --> 00:41:31,000
Speaker 6: is actually a sacred plant and that you're saying like

886
00:41:31,400 --> 00:41:33,680
Speaker 6: one that they say like and I always say this student,

887
00:41:33,760 --> 00:41:36,560
Speaker 6: I think alsoin Mastafian religion, if it's even religion. But

888
00:41:38,160 --> 00:41:40,279
Speaker 6: it opens like your third eye, and it connects you

889
00:41:40,320 --> 00:41:42,040
Speaker 6: in a different way, and you and I feel that

890
00:41:42,120 --> 00:41:42,600
Speaker 6: way when I.

891
00:41:42,640 --> 00:41:45,040
Speaker 3: When I get high. Have you ever this is for

892
00:41:45,120 --> 00:41:45,680
Speaker 3: everybody too.

893
00:41:45,800 --> 00:41:48,520
Speaker 6: Have you ever like gotten high with someone you're dating

894
00:41:48,600 --> 00:41:50,160
Speaker 6: and suddenly you don't like them anymore?

895
00:41:50,360 --> 00:41:55,600
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm like, oh, who they are? I've done that

896
00:41:55,840 --> 00:42:01,120
Speaker 3: and it's so dumb. That's what she really looked like.

897
00:42:01,360 --> 00:42:04,680
Speaker 5: Yeah, literally, and I know I'm not great like their

898
00:42:04,800 --> 00:42:07,759
Speaker 5: your mask, you know, was off, yours came on and

899
00:42:07,800 --> 00:42:08,399
Speaker 5: you get see your.

900
00:42:08,400 --> 00:42:11,200
Speaker 6: Goggles are completely gone, Like You're feelings suddenly are too clear.

901
00:42:11,360 --> 00:42:15,240
Speaker 5: You're like, fuck you suck. But I think it's actually

902
00:42:15,480 --> 00:42:17,480
Speaker 5: not a bad thing because you probably can't hide what

903
00:42:17,560 --> 00:42:19,920
Speaker 5: you're really feeling with your words either. It's so hard

904
00:42:20,000 --> 00:42:24,400
Speaker 5: to hide, so you're looking at you can't be fake

905
00:42:24,520 --> 00:42:25,479
Speaker 5: when you smoke wheed.

906
00:42:25,760 --> 00:42:28,680
Speaker 3: I think most people can't, like you just can't can't.

907
00:42:28,760 --> 00:42:31,839
Speaker 3: In fact, you say too much. Sometimes said you're too

908
00:42:33,000 --> 00:42:35,359
Speaker 3: said too much. You can't feel too fake.

909
00:42:36,000 --> 00:42:38,040
Speaker 5: Smoke weed before they take a light detective disk like

910
00:42:39,239 --> 00:42:42,520
Speaker 5: they really should. They really no faking it.

911
00:42:43,480 --> 00:42:45,960
Speaker 3: One time I was like, when I first started in

912
00:42:46,080 --> 00:42:48,160
Speaker 3: Young Bay, we were high.

913
00:42:48,560 --> 00:42:49,200
Speaker 5: I think we're high?

914
00:42:49,239 --> 00:42:49,840
Speaker 3: Was I just guilty?

915
00:42:50,080 --> 00:42:52,400
Speaker 6: He asked me a question and I lied and I

916
00:42:52,480 --> 00:42:54,000
Speaker 6: didn't even know him, and I was like, it was

917
00:42:54,120 --> 00:42:55,960
Speaker 6: just I thought my heart was like pumping in my

918
00:42:56,080 --> 00:43:02,040
Speaker 6: chest and I was like, like, ten minutes later, was like, well, how.

919
00:43:01,920 --> 00:43:02,560
Speaker 3: About that question?

920
00:43:02,719 --> 00:43:03,120
Speaker 5: You asked me?

921
00:43:04,080 --> 00:43:08,080
Speaker 3: Technically, but I'm like, can you feel me sweatings? He

922
00:43:08,120 --> 00:43:11,239
Speaker 3: can hear me talking? You know, I'm mine. I'm I'm like, bitch,

923
00:43:11,360 --> 00:43:14,160
Speaker 3: don't ever get high again and lie.

924
00:43:16,280 --> 00:43:19,440
Speaker 5: That's what I like about weed, though honestly it doesn't

925
00:43:19,680 --> 00:43:22,040
Speaker 5: like it makes you think. It makes you be your

926
00:43:22,080 --> 00:43:25,360
Speaker 5: authentic self. It does like one thing with weed and

927
00:43:25,480 --> 00:43:27,120
Speaker 5: one thing I feel like that it also helps me

928
00:43:27,280 --> 00:43:31,080
Speaker 5: just be calm. If you go into a room, especially

929
00:43:31,080 --> 00:43:33,160
Speaker 5: after you smoke weed, and you just imagine that everyone

930
00:43:33,239 --> 00:43:36,280
Speaker 5: can actually hear your thoughts, you're gonna stop thinking negative

931
00:43:36,320 --> 00:43:41,200
Speaker 5: thoughts period. You're just gonna stop, and it calms you

932
00:43:41,400 --> 00:43:44,320
Speaker 5: and it really helps me do that. You just go

933
00:43:44,440 --> 00:43:46,480
Speaker 5: in and you're gonna be like, well, shit, she's gonna

934
00:43:46,480 --> 00:43:48,760
Speaker 5: know if she doesn't like me, because it's the truth.

935
00:43:49,200 --> 00:43:50,960
Speaker 5: And if it's not the truth, then it's not the truth.

936
00:43:51,000 --> 00:43:52,560
Speaker 5: But if you just think, like, well, that person can

937
00:43:52,600 --> 00:43:55,160
Speaker 5: already hear my thoughts, so it doesn't even matter. Sure,

938
00:43:55,440 --> 00:43:57,440
Speaker 5: it's just makes you your authentic self. And at least

939
00:43:57,480 --> 00:43:58,239
Speaker 5: that's what it does for me.

940
00:43:58,320 --> 00:44:03,920
Speaker 3: Just like tricks with Natasha. I don't know for everyone,

941
00:44:04,040 --> 00:44:05,560
Speaker 3: but maybe it will help people.

942
00:44:05,719 --> 00:44:09,759
Speaker 4: Know that's hamaractly because I think sometimes people they shy

943
00:44:09,840 --> 00:44:12,600
Speaker 4: away from weed because they haven't figured out how to,

944
00:44:13,120 --> 00:44:16,080
Speaker 4: you know, adjust to it and relax into it or

945
00:44:16,280 --> 00:44:18,560
Speaker 4: decide or like research and find the much of it.

946
00:44:18,680 --> 00:44:22,440
Speaker 4: Most of the time the right strain, know the right dosage.

947
00:44:22,680 --> 00:44:22,840
Speaker 2: You know.

948
00:44:22,920 --> 00:44:25,200
Speaker 4: It's just like any medicine that you take. You're not

949
00:44:25,280 --> 00:44:28,239
Speaker 4: going to take like ten mls of Nike will like

950
00:44:29,040 --> 00:44:29,680
Speaker 4: I speaking of.

951
00:44:29,800 --> 00:44:32,040
Speaker 5: Medicine, And obviously this is wine that I have right here.

952
00:44:32,719 --> 00:44:34,440
Speaker 5: For the first three years that I've had cannabis. You

953
00:44:34,440 --> 00:44:36,080
Speaker 5: can ask any of my friends. They could not get

954
00:44:36,120 --> 00:44:39,440
Speaker 5: me to drink. I just could not handle drinking and

955
00:44:39,560 --> 00:44:42,719
Speaker 5: that together I just it was like drinking vicodin and

956
00:44:42,840 --> 00:44:45,360
Speaker 5: wine together. If you wouldn't do that, don't do that

957
00:44:45,640 --> 00:44:49,520
Speaker 5: with cannabis. And some girls parties come up to me

958
00:44:49,600 --> 00:44:51,640
Speaker 5: and they're like, oh my god, so what is the

959
00:44:51,680 --> 00:44:53,239
Speaker 5: strain going to do to me? And the first thing

960
00:44:53,280 --> 00:44:56,279
Speaker 5: I say is, have you been drinking shit? I don't

961
00:44:56,280 --> 00:44:58,520
Speaker 5: know what it's going to you know what I mean,

962
00:44:58,600 --> 00:45:01,120
Speaker 5: because you've already changed the chemical balance in your in

963
00:45:01,200 --> 00:45:03,719
Speaker 5: your brain and your body. Like, who doesn't matter what

964
00:45:03,800 --> 00:45:07,120
Speaker 5: you're smoking at this point, And so you have to

965
00:45:07,200 --> 00:45:10,200
Speaker 5: really do it the right way and do micro dosing.

966
00:45:10,200 --> 00:45:11,759
Speaker 3: And I'll say that over and over again. One puff

967
00:45:11,840 --> 00:45:12,799
Speaker 3: is enough for most people.

968
00:45:13,560 --> 00:45:16,920
Speaker 5: Most people panic and get into their heads and overeat

969
00:45:16,920 --> 00:45:20,200
Speaker 5: and throw up because they have too much and not

970
00:45:20,280 --> 00:45:21,400
Speaker 5: the right throw up.

971
00:45:22,520 --> 00:45:25,560
Speaker 6: Well, one time I get someone and I can yeah,

972
00:45:28,320 --> 00:45:30,320
Speaker 6: or like if someone takes to bong hit and do

973
00:45:30,840 --> 00:45:31,520
Speaker 6: until they throw.

974
00:45:31,680 --> 00:45:32,960
Speaker 5: You have, I don't like.

975
00:45:33,239 --> 00:45:36,760
Speaker 3: I don't like. Do you like to dab? Honestly?

976
00:45:36,880 --> 00:45:40,400
Speaker 5: I will dad like twice a year something like you

977
00:45:40,440 --> 00:45:45,120
Speaker 5: want to just let actually club clubbing or something like that.

978
00:45:45,440 --> 00:45:52,080
Speaker 3: Club. I know it's probably not the right strain, Like

979
00:45:52,120 --> 00:45:56,680
Speaker 3: I said, it's not not something I remember I thought

980
00:45:57,719 --> 00:46:00,520
Speaker 3: to explode. Yeah, and it's my breast.

981
00:46:00,680 --> 00:46:01,520
Speaker 6: Yeah, it was too much.

982
00:46:01,560 --> 00:46:02,120
Speaker 3: It hurts.

983
00:46:02,320 --> 00:46:04,640
Speaker 5: And going back to a lower tolerance after that it's

984
00:46:04,680 --> 00:46:07,480
Speaker 5: not awesome. Like smoking a dab and then trying to

985
00:46:07,520 --> 00:46:08,200
Speaker 5: go back to Flower.

986
00:46:08,280 --> 00:46:08,640
Speaker 4: It's like.

987
00:46:10,480 --> 00:46:13,320
Speaker 3: Flower, it's not even Yeah, I couldn't, I can't. I

988
00:46:13,400 --> 00:46:17,680
Speaker 3: won't you. Yeah, Flower, I know my limb is good,

989
00:46:17,880 --> 00:46:23,000
Speaker 3: edible and dapping. No, yeah, and vake pins also, I

990
00:46:23,040 --> 00:46:26,959
Speaker 3: mean they're okay here. I like good old flower, good old.

991
00:46:26,880 --> 00:46:29,839
Speaker 5: Flower is the best. Things are okay here and there.

992
00:46:29,920 --> 00:46:31,400
Speaker 5: But now you know they have lead in them, so

993
00:46:31,560 --> 00:46:34,560
Speaker 5: really be careful. We got your really a lot of

994
00:46:34,640 --> 00:46:36,839
Speaker 5: vake pans No, no, no, I know I don't really

995
00:46:36,880 --> 00:46:39,520
Speaker 5: smoke a lot of them, but they're being tested positive.

996
00:46:39,560 --> 00:46:42,160
Speaker 3: If we're going to Disneyland, yeah, take it, take the

997
00:46:42,200 --> 00:46:46,000
Speaker 3: bake pen. Yes, yeah, okay, I can't join a Disneyland pen.

998
00:46:46,160 --> 00:46:50,360
Speaker 5: Yes, of course, Yes, I agree.

999
00:46:50,480 --> 00:46:56,160
Speaker 3: I call it my m yes, my panic pen. Actually, yes, Hanny,

1000
00:46:58,520 --> 00:47:03,320
Speaker 3: while you internet, Oh why god, I'd love to the

1001
00:47:03,440 --> 00:47:08,359
Speaker 3: High Hannah service, the Highness. I will Hannah tattoo out

1002
00:47:08,360 --> 00:47:09,000
Speaker 3: of this, Yes.

1003
00:47:11,040 --> 00:47:11,200
Speaker 4: I do.

1004
00:47:12,080 --> 00:47:12,920
Speaker 3: I love Hannah.

1005
00:47:13,160 --> 00:47:14,759
Speaker 5: I Also I think it's cool to show you that

1006
00:47:14,760 --> 00:47:16,239
Speaker 5: I could still draw while smoking weed.

1007
00:47:16,560 --> 00:47:18,279
Speaker 3: I might have been Indian in my last life because

1008
00:47:18,320 --> 00:47:20,320
Speaker 3: I do love Hannah. I've always loved Hannahs and some

1009
00:47:20,440 --> 00:47:22,480
Speaker 3: speaking you loved, and I love Bendy's.

1010
00:47:22,560 --> 00:47:23,000
Speaker 6: I really do.

1011
00:47:23,239 --> 00:47:25,080
Speaker 3: You were about to light an incense like a second ago.

1012
00:47:25,160 --> 00:47:26,000
Speaker 3: I feel like I did.

1013
00:47:27,920 --> 00:47:34,040
Speaker 6: I love goats, Yeah, you love what gold, ghosts, gold, gold,

1014
00:47:34,239 --> 00:47:36,120
Speaker 6: everything I.

1015
00:47:36,120 --> 00:47:41,520
Speaker 3: Look better and gold to just look better. So can

1016
00:47:41,600 --> 00:47:44,920
Speaker 3: you share, as a mama your birth story. I don't

1017
00:47:44,920 --> 00:47:46,400
Speaker 3: want to ask. We always like to ask mama. Is

1018
00:47:46,400 --> 00:47:49,879
Speaker 3: a birth story is not always great?

1019
00:47:53,160 --> 00:47:56,120
Speaker 5: It was definitely a very long one, a very very

1020
00:47:56,200 --> 00:47:59,799
Speaker 5: long one. And so when I went into labor actually

1021
00:47:59,840 --> 00:48:04,880
Speaker 5: did know it, and I I was at Target actually

1022
00:48:05,160 --> 00:48:07,680
Speaker 5: the day that I was very excited to pack my

1023
00:48:07,760 --> 00:48:10,960
Speaker 5: goddamn bag to take and of course I went into

1024
00:48:11,040 --> 00:48:13,640
Speaker 5: labor that day, right, it always happened. I was thirty

1025
00:48:13,680 --> 00:48:17,239
Speaker 5: seven weeks pregnant and I'm at Target getting the last

1026
00:48:17,280 --> 00:48:20,719
Speaker 5: thing that I need. Some fucking excuse my language, but

1027
00:48:20,760 --> 00:48:24,480
Speaker 5: I swear a lot, but like breastfeeding pads and like

1028
00:48:24,719 --> 00:48:26,680
Speaker 5: you don't need that shit by the way, kind of

1029
00:48:26,719 --> 00:48:28,319
Speaker 5: a pad, and like just put it in your boob,

1030
00:48:28,360 --> 00:48:32,120
Speaker 5: do not buy breastfeeding pads. Okay, So I bought it,

1031
00:48:32,400 --> 00:48:36,040
Speaker 5: and I'm sitting in Target and I'm like, shit, there's

1032
00:48:36,080 --> 00:48:38,800
Speaker 5: like stuff coming out of me, and like your third trimester,

1033
00:48:38,960 --> 00:48:40,840
Speaker 5: you all know, it's like your hit period. Okay, you

1034
00:48:40,920 --> 00:48:43,919
Speaker 5: don't know what the fuck is coming out of time.

1035
00:48:45,160 --> 00:48:46,400
Speaker 5: I'm just wearing a pantliner.

1036
00:48:46,520 --> 00:48:47,720
Speaker 3: I'm like, it's just normal.

1037
00:48:48,080 --> 00:48:50,000
Speaker 5: But then it was a little bit more than usual.

1038
00:48:50,040 --> 00:48:52,600
Speaker 5: But I'm like, yeah, whatever, And honestly, it was leaking

1039
00:48:52,680 --> 00:48:53,480
Speaker 5: like that for a few days.

1040
00:48:53,480 --> 00:48:55,600
Speaker 3: At that point. I probably didn't know, but it was

1041
00:48:55,719 --> 00:48:56,759
Speaker 3: fluid that was coming out of me.

1042
00:48:56,920 --> 00:48:58,040
Speaker 5: My water broke a while ago.

1043
00:48:58,239 --> 00:49:00,400
Speaker 3: Oh, I didn't know it until I got to the hospital.

1044
00:49:00,440 --> 00:49:02,440
Speaker 5: But before that, I left Target and I went back

1045
00:49:02,440 --> 00:49:05,040
Speaker 5: to work and I did like three more clients. Didn't

1046
00:49:05,080 --> 00:49:08,080
Speaker 5: think anything was wrong actually until I saw blood because

1047
00:49:08,120 --> 00:49:13,240
Speaker 5: I didn't have contractions, and so I finally called Joseph

1048
00:49:13,280 --> 00:49:16,040
Speaker 5: Aretha's dad and I was like, all right, I'm bleeding.

1049
00:49:16,080 --> 00:49:18,759
Speaker 5: I should go in. My doctor said, I can't pack

1050
00:49:18,880 --> 00:49:20,640
Speaker 5: my bag, but I'm going to FaceTime you to do it.

1051
00:49:20,719 --> 00:49:20,959
Speaker 3: Okay.

1052
00:49:21,520 --> 00:49:23,480
Speaker 5: So he picks me up, and of course I'm doing

1053
00:49:23,520 --> 00:49:26,000
Speaker 5: my makeup the entire way there because I feel no

1054
00:49:26,080 --> 00:49:27,760
Speaker 5: pain right now, I'm chillin.

1055
00:49:27,960 --> 00:49:29,880
Speaker 3: All I know is I need to get to the hospital.

1056
00:49:30,280 --> 00:49:31,759
Speaker 5: And my mom said, you know, you need to eat

1057
00:49:31,760 --> 00:49:34,000
Speaker 5: before you go into the hospital because they're not going

1058
00:49:34,040 --> 00:49:35,759
Speaker 5: to feed you. So I made him stop at Taco

1059
00:49:35,840 --> 00:49:39,040
Speaker 5: Bell before that. Still nothing is happening. But as soon

1060
00:49:39,080 --> 00:49:41,040
Speaker 5: as we walked in, I was definitely in labor. But

1061
00:49:41,080 --> 00:49:44,279
Speaker 5: Amrita didn't come until two days later. And I was

1062
00:49:44,440 --> 00:49:47,360
Speaker 5: very like against the epidural. I was very against any

1063
00:49:47,760 --> 00:49:51,360
Speaker 5: sort of medication. And what was the other one that

1064
00:49:51,440 --> 00:49:56,200
Speaker 5: they put into your body too? Yes, potosain. I was

1065
00:49:56,320 --> 00:50:01,279
Speaker 5: very again, especially after watching the documentary Business Born.

1066
00:50:01,560 --> 00:50:03,680
Speaker 3: Yes, Business is being born. I was like nah.

1067
00:50:03,880 --> 00:50:09,000
Speaker 5: So after like twelve thirteen hours, I finally said give

1068
00:50:09,000 --> 00:50:11,920
Speaker 5: it to me because I wasn't having contractions. After that,

1069
00:50:12,360 --> 00:50:16,040
Speaker 5: I sat there and I like to share this because

1070
00:50:16,760 --> 00:50:19,640
Speaker 5: they gave me an epidural almost twenty four hours later,

1071
00:50:20,360 --> 00:50:22,520
Speaker 5: and my epidural actually came out of my back.

1072
00:50:23,680 --> 00:50:25,640
Speaker 6: Isn't that too late to give it to you? I

1073
00:50:25,960 --> 00:50:27,799
Speaker 6: I two days with me too, and I got mine

1074
00:50:27,840 --> 00:50:30,120
Speaker 6: the second see, oh my god, it was a very

1075
00:50:30,320 --> 00:50:31,120
Speaker 6: long time.

1076
00:50:31,239 --> 00:50:33,560
Speaker 3: I went to liber two, I got potosin.

1077
00:50:33,640 --> 00:50:35,759
Speaker 6: I mean potosin on Tuesday, and I didn't get an

1078
00:50:35,800 --> 00:50:37,400
Speaker 6: epidural and give birth till Thursday.

1079
00:50:37,680 --> 00:50:38,080
Speaker 3: Thanks good.

1080
00:50:38,120 --> 00:50:40,359
Speaker 5: Yeah see yeah, when on on Wednesday and she came

1081
00:50:40,400 --> 00:50:44,080
Speaker 5: in on Friday, and by the time, like you know,

1082
00:50:44,160 --> 00:50:47,040
Speaker 5: twelve hours went by, I actually can feel everything down there,

1083
00:50:47,560 --> 00:50:50,200
Speaker 5: and I started screaming to the nurse. I was like,

1084
00:50:50,320 --> 00:50:52,200
Speaker 5: can you get this Catherine out of me? Like, get

1085
00:50:52,320 --> 00:50:55,160
Speaker 5: it out? It was just hurting and it was true.

1086
00:50:55,200 --> 00:50:59,640
Speaker 5: The oh yeah, IV actually came out of our back.

1087
00:50:59,680 --> 00:51:02,440
Speaker 5: And a lot of people don't know an epidural is

1088
00:51:02,520 --> 00:51:05,600
Speaker 5: not a shot. It's an IV obviously. Yeah, people don't

1089
00:51:05,719 --> 00:51:07,360
Speaker 5: know that until I have a baby.

1090
00:51:08,640 --> 00:51:10,480
Speaker 3: I think it's a shot. Yeah, No, it's not. You

1091
00:51:10,600 --> 00:51:14,200
Speaker 3: press this button and things. Yeah, oh my god.

1092
00:51:14,400 --> 00:51:16,640
Speaker 5: And so they finally gave me the shot. But by

1093
00:51:16,719 --> 00:51:18,720
Speaker 5: the time I started pushing, it can definitely feel everything.

1094
00:51:18,920 --> 00:51:21,560
Speaker 5: Pushed for three hours. Definitely had a high fever by

1095
00:51:21,600 --> 00:51:23,279
Speaker 5: the time she came because I was in labor for

1096
00:51:23,360 --> 00:51:26,279
Speaker 5: so long. But by the end we ended up doing

1097
00:51:26,640 --> 00:51:29,640
Speaker 5: a vacuum on her head, not an emergency six section,

1098
00:51:29,800 --> 00:51:30,560
Speaker 5: but it would have been that.

1099
00:51:30,640 --> 00:51:31,520
Speaker 3: If she didn't come out.

1100
00:51:31,560 --> 00:51:34,440
Speaker 5: And Aria was born two days later, but it was

1101
00:51:34,520 --> 00:51:37,080
Speaker 5: a really long process, and everyone's birth story, like you said,

1102
00:51:37,160 --> 00:51:40,000
Speaker 5: is different. But I didn't have any contractions, and the

1103
00:51:40,080 --> 00:51:40,719
Speaker 5: beginning was fun.

1104
00:51:40,800 --> 00:51:42,600
Speaker 3: Did you start having constractions just as I gave you

1105
00:51:42,640 --> 00:51:45,200
Speaker 3: that fucking potosin? Not right away?

1106
00:51:45,239 --> 00:51:45,880
Speaker 5: It was very light.

1107
00:51:46,080 --> 00:51:49,520
Speaker 3: I have videos of me dancing with my nurse.

1108
00:51:49,520 --> 00:51:55,080
Speaker 4: And it was full contraction, hurting, yes, because I never

1109
00:51:55,760 --> 00:51:59,759
Speaker 4: I was late and so they induced me and then

1110
00:52:00,080 --> 00:52:00,799
Speaker 4: getting a see section.

1111
00:52:01,000 --> 00:52:04,120
Speaker 3: But and that epidural, Oh my god, I'm never at

1112
00:52:04,160 --> 00:52:06,080
Speaker 3: The doctor had his like assistant chewing it.

1113
00:52:06,160 --> 00:52:08,879
Speaker 4: They kept missing like my spine, so they just kept

1114
00:52:08,920 --> 00:52:11,200
Speaker 4: poking me and I was, oh my god, you try

1115
00:52:11,239 --> 00:52:13,960
Speaker 4: to be so tense contractions.

1116
00:52:14,040 --> 00:52:15,200
Speaker 5: It was the world and they want you to be

1117
00:52:15,280 --> 00:52:17,440
Speaker 5: in in this position while you have this huge belly

1118
00:52:17,719 --> 00:52:21,520
Speaker 5: right oh yeah, and then like if you could be

1119
00:52:21,560 --> 00:52:23,000
Speaker 5: paralyzed and you.

1120
00:52:23,080 --> 00:52:26,640
Speaker 3: Have your contraction. Yes, it's it's it's quite serious in there.

1121
00:52:26,880 --> 00:52:28,960
Speaker 3: What is the vacuum? Like I've only ever seen like

1122
00:52:29,200 --> 00:52:30,120
Speaker 3: videotube videos.

1123
00:52:30,480 --> 00:52:32,640
Speaker 5: Okay, so the vacuum really does sound like a vacuum,

1124
00:52:33,440 --> 00:52:35,840
Speaker 5: but it's seen it But like the size of a quarter,

1125
00:52:36,040 --> 00:52:36,920
Speaker 5: does it feel.

1126
00:52:36,800 --> 00:52:37,919
Speaker 3: Like a pulling out?

1127
00:52:38,080 --> 00:52:38,680
Speaker 4: Like do you fit it?

1128
00:52:38,760 --> 00:52:42,040
Speaker 3: It feels like they're pulling Amrantha out. Did you feel it?

1129
00:52:43,400 --> 00:52:47,399
Speaker 5: I just felt pain just because the epidural really didn't

1130
00:52:47,440 --> 00:52:50,279
Speaker 5: get you know. I just felt like burning the entire time.

1131
00:52:50,400 --> 00:52:52,720
Speaker 5: And yeah, she did. I just felt like a pop,

1132
00:52:53,000 --> 00:52:55,719
Speaker 5: like a you know, it just come out in a

1133
00:52:55,800 --> 00:52:59,919
Speaker 5: relief afterwards, and and it was just it was very small,

1134
00:53:00,120 --> 00:53:01,720
Speaker 5: was like the size of a quarter.

1135
00:53:02,400 --> 00:53:04,239
Speaker 3: What was the vacuum the top of it.

1136
00:53:04,320 --> 00:53:06,640
Speaker 5: It's a flat and it's a wire that comes out

1137
00:53:06,640 --> 00:53:08,520
Speaker 5: of it and there just it sits on their crown

1138
00:53:08,920 --> 00:53:11,360
Speaker 5: and it helps them. And it left a very small

1139
00:53:12,200 --> 00:53:16,480
Speaker 5: round mark on Aretha's head, which lasted like just a

1140
00:53:16,560 --> 00:53:18,759
Speaker 5: few days. But Amretha popped right out. I wish they

1141
00:53:18,840 --> 00:53:22,040
Speaker 5: did it sooner. I did have a third degree tear,

1142
00:53:22,239 --> 00:53:25,920
Speaker 5: which was a a lot of stitches. Oh girl, yes,

1143
00:53:26,840 --> 00:53:28,640
Speaker 5: And a lot of women don't do. I don't know

1144
00:53:28,680 --> 00:53:30,680
Speaker 5: if this is going to help you anyone listening, but

1145
00:53:31,360 --> 00:53:33,920
Speaker 5: buy squirt bottles and have it in every single bathroom

1146
00:53:33,960 --> 00:53:35,200
Speaker 5: and take it with you to the hospital and have

1147
00:53:35,280 --> 00:53:38,400
Speaker 5: warm water when you pee. The ammonia hitting all of

1148
00:53:38,440 --> 00:53:40,719
Speaker 5: those open wounds just make it burn. So if you

1149
00:53:40,880 --> 00:53:44,080
Speaker 5: just have warm water squirting in that area, every pea

1150
00:53:44,160 --> 00:53:46,680
Speaker 5: is painless. At least from my experience it was. It

1151
00:53:46,800 --> 00:53:47,480
Speaker 5: helped a lot.

1152
00:53:47,680 --> 00:53:50,440
Speaker 6: I mean because nobody talks about no one was dying

1153
00:53:50,560 --> 00:53:54,400
Speaker 6: after and having a heating pad, like, although that helped

1154
00:53:54,480 --> 00:53:58,960
Speaker 6: when you're breastfeeding, because you're contracting, that's contractions that you're

1155
00:53:59,000 --> 00:54:00,480
Speaker 6: having going back.

1156
00:54:00,600 --> 00:54:02,400
Speaker 5: Your uter is going back to it's actual size, and

1157
00:54:02,440 --> 00:54:04,160
Speaker 5: no one wants to talk about that. So I always say,

1158
00:54:05,080 --> 00:54:08,320
Speaker 5: take a squirre bottle, take a heating pad, like, just

1159
00:54:08,360 --> 00:54:11,680
Speaker 5: take anything that's going to make you feel comfortable, because

1160
00:54:11,719 --> 00:54:13,880
Speaker 5: no one wants to talk about the after you know

1161
00:54:14,160 --> 00:54:16,200
Speaker 5: care of it, and fourth trimester is actually.

1162
00:54:15,960 --> 00:54:19,840
Speaker 3: Worse Appeying on yourself, oh for the rest of your

1163
00:54:19,880 --> 00:54:20,319
Speaker 3: life after.

1164
00:54:20,800 --> 00:54:22,719
Speaker 5: I mean I feel like I put on myself when

1165
00:54:22,760 --> 00:54:26,080
Speaker 5: I call, it will dribble out, like if I don't

1166
00:54:26,080 --> 00:54:29,440
Speaker 5: pay immediately. There's like a slow drizzler one time, I

1167
00:54:29,520 --> 00:54:30,400
Speaker 5: were like a full.

1168
00:54:30,280 --> 00:54:32,840
Speaker 3: Piece, like gray one piece the other day and I

1169
00:54:32,920 --> 00:54:34,440
Speaker 3: like didn't go right when I needed to go, and

1170
00:54:34,480 --> 00:54:38,680
Speaker 3: I'm like, I look, there's like a little drizzle darky.

1171
00:54:39,160 --> 00:54:44,040
Speaker 5: I'm like, this is fucking ridiculous. It was a drizzle.

1172
00:54:45,080 --> 00:54:47,480
Speaker 5: Gary Pennyliner's Moms After You give Birth.

1173
00:54:49,320 --> 00:54:51,920
Speaker 6: Okay, well, I also wanted to ask you because I

1174
00:54:52,000 --> 00:54:57,759
Speaker 6: know Msa, I'm Rita's dad isn't like from the same

1175
00:54:57,840 --> 00:55:00,359
Speaker 6: background as you, And I know that's a big thing

1176
00:55:00,400 --> 00:55:03,239
Speaker 6: in your culture and Hindu culture, and like what was

1177
00:55:03,280 --> 00:55:06,359
Speaker 6: your experience with that or on his side and how

1178
00:55:06,480 --> 00:55:09,160
Speaker 6: did you get past that and what is it like now.

1179
00:55:10,840 --> 00:55:13,080
Speaker 3: So I don't think actually it's just in Hindu culture.

1180
00:55:13,080 --> 00:55:15,920
Speaker 5: I think it's just Indian East Indian culture, like or

1181
00:55:16,360 --> 00:55:19,000
Speaker 5: really only any culture all across the board. They just

1182
00:55:19,040 --> 00:55:21,360
Speaker 5: think black people are bad people for some reason. And

1183
00:55:21,480 --> 00:55:24,839
Speaker 5: that's just just being straightforward and honest because a lot

1184
00:55:24,840 --> 00:55:27,040
Speaker 5: of people say Hindu and it's not himdu I always

1185
00:55:27,080 --> 00:55:30,319
Speaker 5: like to crackt them because it's freaking everyone and they

1186
00:55:30,360 --> 00:55:32,520
Speaker 5: think they're not intelligent or they're not educated, and it's

1187
00:55:32,640 --> 00:55:37,439
Speaker 5: it's not true. And Joseph, honestly, like when we met,

1188
00:55:37,760 --> 00:55:40,840
Speaker 5: we were really good friends at first, and I honestly

1189
00:55:40,880 --> 00:55:42,680
Speaker 5: thought he was gay the first year because he never

1190
00:55:42,800 --> 00:55:44,640
Speaker 5: made a move on me. We were just really good

1191
00:55:44,640 --> 00:55:46,680
Speaker 5: friends and he was like, you're Indian. I just didn't

1192
00:55:46,680 --> 00:55:48,960
Speaker 5: think I could do anything anyways with you, you know.

1193
00:55:49,160 --> 00:55:53,279
Speaker 5: So after a year of dating, like I just I

1194
00:55:53,400 --> 00:55:55,200
Speaker 5: kind of just brought him over as a friend. And

1195
00:55:55,360 --> 00:55:58,279
Speaker 5: I knew that my parents growing up, they did want

1196
00:55:58,280 --> 00:56:01,279
Speaker 5: an Indian man, you know. They It's not like they

1197
00:56:01,400 --> 00:56:06,040
Speaker 5: don't want the cultural wedding, you know, like whatever religion

1198
00:56:06,160 --> 00:56:09,680
Speaker 5: you know, they are, they continuing to say they still

1199
00:56:09,680 --> 00:56:14,320
Speaker 5: want a wedding. They still want a wedding, and like

1200
00:56:14,520 --> 00:56:17,279
Speaker 5: totally yeah, and I'm sure you don't even know about

1201
00:56:17,280 --> 00:56:19,080
Speaker 5: it because they act like it doesn't exist all the time.

1202
00:56:19,120 --> 00:56:21,480
Speaker 5: You know, Indian parents are like not in a bad way,

1203
00:56:21,520 --> 00:56:23,880
Speaker 5: but they're very smart with their money. They're very like bargainers.

1204
00:56:24,000 --> 00:56:27,560
Speaker 5: You It's but they have a secret account for that wedding. Yeah,

1205
00:56:27,920 --> 00:56:29,960
Speaker 5: I'm sure they do. They I don't know where it

1206
00:56:30,000 --> 00:56:32,239
Speaker 5: comes from sometimes, but like I'm glad that they do.

1207
00:56:32,440 --> 00:56:35,080
Speaker 5: I'm grateful for that, you know. It's it's very important

1208
00:56:35,120 --> 00:56:37,520
Speaker 5: to them. They live for their children's wedding day. But

1209
00:56:37,600 --> 00:56:39,319
Speaker 5: you can still have that wedding, right, I mean, look

1210
00:56:39,360 --> 00:56:42,920
Speaker 5: at Prianka and I don't even think it's all about

1211
00:56:43,040 --> 00:56:46,040
Speaker 5: weddings anymore. Our generation is just so different. It's not

1212
00:56:46,280 --> 00:56:48,920
Speaker 5: about a wedding. It's not about people don't even want

1213
00:56:48,920 --> 00:56:52,479
Speaker 5: a relationship, you know what I mean, They don't want

1214
00:56:52,800 --> 00:56:54,560
Speaker 5: they don't want that, and that's okay if they don't

1215
00:56:54,560 --> 00:56:56,000
Speaker 5: want to get married, And it's okay if they don't

1216
00:56:56,000 --> 00:56:57,200
Speaker 5: want to get married until they're forty.

1217
00:56:57,520 --> 00:56:59,840
Speaker 3: I think that's like our culture. They just that's what

1218
00:57:00,040 --> 00:57:01,920
Speaker 3: they know, and that's what they think, and that's all

1219
00:57:02,000 --> 00:57:03,680
Speaker 3: they know. Well, I think they know. Like they're like

1220
00:57:03,760 --> 00:57:08,239
Speaker 3: people were realizing we we live long lives. We have

1221
00:57:08,400 --> 00:57:10,239
Speaker 3: we don't have to figure it out early, Like you

1222
00:57:10,280 --> 00:57:11,160
Speaker 3: don't have to figure it out.

1223
00:57:11,040 --> 00:57:13,560
Speaker 5: When we're twenty no, you know, and we live in

1224
00:57:13,600 --> 00:57:16,920
Speaker 5: a very living different generation, Like we're living long.

1225
00:57:16,960 --> 00:57:19,120
Speaker 3: People are just living longer in general.

1226
00:57:19,520 --> 00:57:21,840
Speaker 4: Yeah, they're like having their thinking more about how they

1227
00:57:21,920 --> 00:57:24,040
Speaker 4: want to spend their life and.

1228
00:57:24,200 --> 00:57:28,960
Speaker 6: Just challenging the like the social norms that we've been previously,

1229
00:57:29,200 --> 00:57:31,720
Speaker 6: you know we've adopted. That doesn't always have to look

1230
00:57:31,920 --> 00:57:35,520
Speaker 6: just like this, Yeah, you know, being flexible what that

1231
00:57:35,600 --> 00:57:38,640
Speaker 6: looks like, and you know, reforming it for our own

1232
00:57:39,280 --> 00:57:40,000
Speaker 6: redefining it.

1233
00:57:40,280 --> 00:57:41,080
Speaker 3: Yeah, totally.

1234
00:57:42,000 --> 00:57:44,880
Speaker 5: Like so after that, bringing justph and I just brought

1235
00:57:44,920 --> 00:57:47,440
Speaker 5: him in as a friend and my parents pretty much

1236
00:57:47,520 --> 00:57:49,560
Speaker 5: knew after he kept coming around a lot.

1237
00:57:49,640 --> 00:57:51,760
Speaker 3: But I'm glad my parents so also, was it at

1238
00:57:51,760 --> 00:57:53,200
Speaker 3: that point when he when he did bring around, he

1239
00:57:53,320 --> 00:57:54,960
Speaker 3: was just a friend. He he was just a friend.

1240
00:57:55,000 --> 00:57:56,640
Speaker 5: But we were actually like hanging out for a year

1241
00:57:57,120 --> 00:57:59,160
Speaker 5: and I think my mom understood who he was. And

1242
00:57:59,280 --> 00:58:02,280
Speaker 5: they were very because they always said, as long as

1243
00:58:02,400 --> 00:58:04,560
Speaker 5: you are happy, we are happy. And as long as

1244
00:58:04,600 --> 00:58:07,919
Speaker 5: he keeps you happy, that's okay. Whatever you guys want.

1245
00:58:08,120 --> 00:58:11,560
Speaker 5: And my dad's very like hardcore with just supporting what

1246
00:58:11,680 --> 00:58:14,440
Speaker 5: he kids, what his kids do, and he was like,

1247
00:58:14,520 --> 00:58:16,320
Speaker 5: if anyone says anything, I'll deal with them, you know

1248
00:58:16,360 --> 00:58:19,320
Speaker 5: what I mean, forget them, you know, as long as you're.

1249
00:58:19,200 --> 00:58:21,360
Speaker 3: Happy or my children, you know, we got your back,

1250
00:58:21,480 --> 00:58:21,640
Speaker 3: you know.

1251
00:58:21,760 --> 00:58:25,400
Speaker 5: And it's so good to again have that platform, not

1252
00:58:25,840 --> 00:58:28,240
Speaker 5: I mean that openness with your family, because that's another

1253
00:58:28,240 --> 00:58:31,440
Speaker 5: reason why I can advocate obviously, because my dad allowed.

1254
00:58:31,200 --> 00:58:31,640
Speaker 4: This, you know.

1255
00:58:32,320 --> 00:58:36,880
Speaker 5: So dating Joseph, yeah, it was very weird because you

1256
00:58:37,040 --> 00:58:39,240
Speaker 5: get asked the dumbest questions.

1257
00:58:38,880 --> 00:58:41,080
Speaker 3: Like, oh my god, what is it like dating a

1258
00:58:41,120 --> 00:58:41,560
Speaker 3: black man?

1259
00:58:41,760 --> 00:58:44,800
Speaker 5: And I'm like, from your family members, from just people

1260
00:58:45,760 --> 00:58:49,480
Speaker 5: people in general, and it's just superpod especially like Indian

1261
00:58:49,520 --> 00:58:50,000
Speaker 5: women too.

1262
00:58:50,120 --> 00:58:53,080
Speaker 3: And I don't I'm not upset that they asked me

1263
00:58:53,240 --> 00:58:54,560
Speaker 3: this because they.

1264
00:58:54,480 --> 00:58:56,640
Speaker 5: Want to know, they want to know, and they want

1265
00:58:56,680 --> 00:58:57,480
Speaker 5: to know how.

1266
00:58:57,760 --> 00:58:59,040
Speaker 3: My parents adjusted to this.

1267
00:58:59,560 --> 00:59:01,320
Speaker 5: Maybe because they didn't want to tell me that they

1268
00:59:01,360 --> 00:59:03,480
Speaker 5: were dating someone or had a crush on someone, or

1269
00:59:03,520 --> 00:59:05,320
Speaker 5: maybe they wanted to know how they could you're giving

1270
00:59:05,360 --> 00:59:07,400
Speaker 5: it up to yeah, or how they can open it

1271
00:59:07,520 --> 00:59:10,080
Speaker 5: up to their family. Whatever the reason it was, they

1272
00:59:10,120 --> 00:59:14,600
Speaker 5: were asking me. But what I saw was he's a human,

1273
00:59:15,080 --> 00:59:17,720
Speaker 5: Like what do you mean when is it like dating

1274
00:59:17,760 --> 00:59:18,400
Speaker 5: a black person?

1275
00:59:18,560 --> 00:59:18,600
Speaker 3: Like?

1276
00:59:19,360 --> 00:59:22,080
Speaker 5: That's one thing I actually hate a lot with our culture.

1277
00:59:22,240 --> 00:59:24,800
Speaker 5: Is the second thing that they feel like they need

1278
00:59:24,920 --> 00:59:27,760
Speaker 5: to say is their race. I don't feel like any

1279
00:59:27,880 --> 00:59:31,960
Speaker 5: person needs to say the race of what they're dating.

1280
00:59:32,080 --> 00:59:33,640
Speaker 5: Is why is it even necessary?

1281
00:59:33,840 --> 00:59:33,880
Speaker 6: Like?

1282
00:59:34,280 --> 00:59:36,919
Speaker 3: Does he keep you happy? What does he like do? Even?

1283
00:59:37,000 --> 00:59:39,640
Speaker 3: What do you guys do? How do you mean you know?

1284
00:59:39,920 --> 00:59:40,480
Speaker 4: And you know?

1285
00:59:41,360 --> 00:59:43,440
Speaker 3: How long have you guys been seeing each other? What

1286
00:59:43,640 --> 00:59:46,920
Speaker 3: kind of things do you do before? His race? All

1287
00:59:47,000 --> 00:59:47,960
Speaker 3: of these things are important.

1288
00:59:47,960 --> 00:59:50,320
Speaker 5: And I actually got offended over time when people started

1289
00:59:50,360 --> 00:59:52,280
Speaker 5: asking me over and over again what is it like

1290
00:59:52,360 --> 00:59:53,160
Speaker 5: being a black guy?

1291
00:59:53,320 --> 00:59:53,440
Speaker 6: Oh?

1292
00:59:53,880 --> 00:59:57,480
Speaker 5: And like and I'm like all right, and and when

1293
00:59:57,520 --> 01:00:00,160
Speaker 5: someone wants to ask even like, oh my god, how

1294
01:00:00,280 --> 01:00:02,160
Speaker 5: is he in bed? Okay? First off, does he have

1295
01:00:02,200 --> 01:00:04,800
Speaker 5: a big dick, Like seriously, when people want to ask it,

1296
01:00:05,080 --> 01:00:06,240
Speaker 5: I don't answer that question.

1297
01:00:06,440 --> 01:00:08,320
Speaker 3: I'm just saying that to me.

1298
01:00:08,520 --> 01:00:11,640
Speaker 5: That's like they I mean, I understand, Like when we're younger,

1299
01:00:11,760 --> 01:00:13,600
Speaker 5: I guess you say things like that, But as you

1300
01:00:13,640 --> 01:00:15,680
Speaker 5: get older, I think talking about your sex life is

1301
01:00:15,760 --> 01:00:19,000
Speaker 5: freaking immature. Like I don't think anyone else needs to know.

1302
01:00:19,120 --> 01:00:21,479
Speaker 5: And again it is everyone else's opinions. I'm not saying

1303
01:00:22,080 --> 01:00:24,080
Speaker 5: my way is the right way, but when you're in

1304
01:00:24,200 --> 01:00:26,920
Speaker 5: a relationship with someone, that sex life is just between

1305
01:00:26,960 --> 01:00:29,480
Speaker 5: you two, and I would not want to go to

1306
01:00:29,560 --> 01:00:32,439
Speaker 5: my friends and be like, yes, that was so amazing lesson,

1307
01:00:32,720 --> 01:00:33,400
Speaker 5: like for.

1308
01:00:33,560 --> 01:00:37,120
Speaker 3: What for what do I need to give you that for?

1309
01:00:37,600 --> 01:00:41,680
Speaker 3: You know what I mean? Like, and you know what,

1310
01:00:42,000 --> 01:00:43,200
Speaker 3: I don't think you're immature.

1311
01:00:43,240 --> 01:00:46,640
Speaker 5: But I've also had experiences where I've had girlfriends.

1312
01:00:46,160 --> 01:00:49,360
Speaker 3: That have gone over gone after. Have you ever had

1313
01:00:49,400 --> 01:00:51,760
Speaker 3: a friend of yours gone after someone that you abordating?

1314
01:00:52,760 --> 01:00:55,680
Speaker 6: A friend like close She's saying, like, were you talking

1315
01:00:55,680 --> 01:00:58,480
Speaker 6: too much about someone's sex a friend like was trying

1316
01:00:58,520 --> 01:00:59,920
Speaker 6: to creep down I'm sure.

1317
01:01:00,800 --> 01:01:02,280
Speaker 3: Probably maybe I don't know about it.

1318
01:01:02,960 --> 01:01:05,520
Speaker 5: I have so over experiences in life That's another reason

1319
01:01:05,680 --> 01:01:08,880
Speaker 5: why I don't keep speak and I've learned not to

1320
01:01:09,080 --> 01:01:11,480
Speaker 5: over back to that experience. I've learned never to do.

1321
01:01:14,160 --> 01:01:14,680
Speaker 5: I don't.

1322
01:01:14,760 --> 01:01:17,320
Speaker 3: I'm just being honest, you know, like over experiences.

1323
01:01:17,360 --> 01:01:19,560
Speaker 5: Now I'm just like not But it's it's a question

1324
01:01:19,640 --> 01:01:22,640
Speaker 5: that I'm like, it's you shouldn't even ask. But really

1325
01:01:22,680 --> 01:01:24,800
Speaker 5: what they're asking is is this peenis bigger than everyone else?

1326
01:01:24,920 --> 01:01:25,480
Speaker 3: Is that I've seen?

1327
01:01:25,920 --> 01:01:27,600
Speaker 5: Why don't you just ask me that question? Is what

1328
01:01:27,720 --> 01:01:29,400
Speaker 5: the end of this story was supposed to me?

1329
01:01:29,560 --> 01:01:30,240
Speaker 3: You know what I mean?

1330
01:01:30,680 --> 01:01:33,960
Speaker 5: Because people are ridiculous about these things. And then obviously

1331
01:01:34,120 --> 01:01:34,440
Speaker 5: like is.

1332
01:01:34,440 --> 01:01:37,000
Speaker 3: He the smart you know what I mean? Like, what

1333
01:01:37,080 --> 01:01:38,320
Speaker 3: does he do? It is true?

1334
01:01:38,880 --> 01:01:39,520
Speaker 5: It is not true?

1335
01:01:39,600 --> 01:01:40,040
Speaker 3: Thank god.

1336
01:01:40,480 --> 01:01:44,480
Speaker 5: Yeah, I have two beautiful women here of this culture saying.

1337
01:01:44,240 --> 01:01:47,600
Speaker 3: It not true. Not always.

1338
01:01:48,360 --> 01:01:48,640
Speaker 5: Thank you.

1339
01:01:49,240 --> 01:01:52,600
Speaker 3: Guys, don't have the next period point blank are if

1340
01:01:52,600 --> 01:01:53,120
Speaker 3: you guys want to.

1341
01:01:53,120 --> 01:01:55,840
Speaker 5: Talk about this like, but for me, after a while,

1342
01:01:55,920 --> 01:01:59,959
Speaker 5: I guess it just got annoying with my group of people.

1343
01:02:00,480 --> 01:02:02,919
Speaker 3: And then it went on to like because you're already like, Okay,

1344
01:02:02,920 --> 01:02:03,840
Speaker 3: why does that hatters raised?

1345
01:02:03,840 --> 01:02:04,160
Speaker 4: Why does that?

1346
01:02:04,320 --> 01:02:04,440
Speaker 5: You know?

1347
01:02:04,520 --> 01:02:05,320
Speaker 3: It's like all these things.

1348
01:02:05,440 --> 01:02:07,640
Speaker 5: If one person asked me about is dick And if

1349
01:02:07,680 --> 01:02:09,760
Speaker 5: it's really once you go black, you don't go about it?

1350
01:02:09,880 --> 01:02:13,840
Speaker 3: Is that it's curious, it's curiosity. Totally try it. Then yeah,

1351
01:02:13,840 --> 01:02:15,440
Speaker 3: they don't know what else to say. My experience is

1352
01:02:15,480 --> 01:02:16,640
Speaker 3: not gonna be your experience.

1353
01:02:16,400 --> 01:02:18,160
Speaker 5: To begin with with any category in life.

1354
01:02:18,200 --> 01:02:19,800
Speaker 3: Wait, is it the first black I ever dated? Have

1355
01:02:19,880 --> 01:02:22,919
Speaker 3: you have you did first? Yeah? I feel like people

1356
01:02:22,960 --> 01:02:24,680
Speaker 3: would ask the same thing if I was dating an

1357
01:02:24,680 --> 01:02:28,080
Speaker 3: Indian man, like what's what's it like dating an Indian guy?

1358
01:02:28,160 --> 01:02:28,280
Speaker 1: Oh?

1359
01:02:28,360 --> 01:02:28,959
Speaker 3: My god?

1360
01:02:29,480 --> 01:02:29,680
Speaker 4: Or like.

1361
01:02:31,240 --> 01:02:31,919
Speaker 3: Ask you Yeah.

1362
01:02:32,000 --> 01:02:34,240
Speaker 4: I feel like I don't feel like it's I don't

1363
01:02:34,240 --> 01:02:35,920
Speaker 4: feel like it's exclusive to black people.

1364
01:02:36,240 --> 01:02:38,360
Speaker 3: I think it's probably asked more like maybe dated an

1365
01:02:38,360 --> 01:02:38,840
Speaker 3: Asian guy?

1366
01:02:39,600 --> 01:02:41,480
Speaker 5: Yeah, but they I feel like in my culture, I

1367
01:02:41,520 --> 01:02:44,720
Speaker 5: guess or with my experience, people think it's like okay

1368
01:02:44,800 --> 01:02:48,080
Speaker 5: things to say, but like things like, oh my gosh,

1369
01:02:48,120 --> 01:02:49,680
Speaker 5: he doesn't have he doesn't sound hood.

1370
01:02:52,920 --> 01:02:53,440
Speaker 3: I hate that.

1371
01:02:53,680 --> 01:02:56,240
Speaker 5: Yeah, not all sound hood. And it's not that they

1372
01:02:56,320 --> 01:02:59,680
Speaker 5: sound hood. That's where they're from. That's they're yelized. That's

1373
01:02:59,680 --> 01:03:02,520
Speaker 5: the exactly what I say. That's her dialect. It's true,

1374
01:03:02,720 --> 01:03:05,080
Speaker 5: it's and it pisces me off. And obviously being in

1375
01:03:05,160 --> 01:03:07,240
Speaker 5: that culture, you just realize.

1376
01:03:06,840 --> 01:03:08,920
Speaker 3: Like, but you know, it's also good that you can it.

1377
01:03:09,360 --> 01:03:10,120
Speaker 3: You just correct it.

1378
01:03:10,560 --> 01:03:12,760
Speaker 5: And that's what I do now, especially being a mom

1379
01:03:13,440 --> 01:03:16,800
Speaker 5: of a mixed baby. Oh yes, it means so much

1380
01:03:16,880 --> 01:03:19,320
Speaker 5: more for me to correct these people. And I correct

1381
01:03:19,360 --> 01:03:23,000
Speaker 5: it very quickly now, and sometimes it you know, I

1382
01:03:23,120 --> 01:03:26,600
Speaker 5: might sound like I'm coming off rude, but I try

1383
01:03:26,640 --> 01:03:29,600
Speaker 5: to be very nice while saying it, because I hear

1384
01:03:29,720 --> 01:03:35,120
Speaker 5: things like, oh, I'm with this hair's curly, Yeah, bitch, she's.

1385
01:03:37,080 --> 01:03:42,160
Speaker 3: And Indian women have curly hair too. Why are we

1386
01:03:42,320 --> 01:03:43,000
Speaker 3: commenting like.

1387
01:03:44,520 --> 01:03:44,640
Speaker 4: Hair?

1388
01:03:44,680 --> 01:03:45,160
Speaker 3: It's stupid.

1389
01:03:45,280 --> 01:03:47,720
Speaker 5: It's just stupid. And over time I just stopped even

1390
01:03:47,720 --> 01:03:50,280
Speaker 5: hanging around women that even like want to say comments

1391
01:03:50,360 --> 01:03:52,720
Speaker 5: like oh my god, how do you lose so much weight?

1392
01:03:52,880 --> 01:03:55,320
Speaker 5: Like I hate you you're skinny, And if you're a

1393
01:03:55,400 --> 01:03:57,600
Speaker 5: good friend of mine and you want to say that,

1394
01:03:57,680 --> 01:03:59,760
Speaker 5: you're really saying that to me, And after you smoke,

1395
01:03:59,840 --> 01:04:03,440
Speaker 5: we you're like, why are you so fat?

1396
01:04:03,920 --> 01:04:05,959
Speaker 3: How are you not a mom?

1397
01:04:06,440 --> 01:04:08,439
Speaker 5: Don't have nothing else going on your life and can't

1398
01:04:08,440 --> 01:04:10,120
Speaker 5: make it to the gym? Why are you even commenting

1399
01:04:10,200 --> 01:04:12,360
Speaker 5: on my one's appearance? Or why someone's wearing this?

1400
01:04:12,760 --> 01:04:13,080
Speaker 3: Mind you?

1401
01:04:13,200 --> 01:04:15,080
Speaker 5: And maybe I did that, and maybe I had these

1402
01:04:15,120 --> 01:04:17,320
Speaker 5: friends in the past, but now that I'm a mom,

1403
01:04:17,760 --> 01:04:20,040
Speaker 5: I just don't want to make even pick up these tendencies.

1404
01:04:20,160 --> 01:04:22,720
Speaker 5: That's true, and think we will make you be like

1405
01:04:23,040 --> 01:04:27,800
Speaker 5: what the awareness after you spoke go back around to

1406
01:04:27,880 --> 01:04:31,800
Speaker 5: friends and you valuate them again. I'm like, they want

1407
01:04:31,840 --> 01:04:33,840
Speaker 5: to say, like, why are you wearing that? And like

1408
01:04:34,120 --> 01:04:37,520
Speaker 5: because they liked it, it's happening, you know what I mean?

1409
01:04:37,600 --> 01:04:39,680
Speaker 3: And I can maybe I asked like that before, but

1410
01:04:39,880 --> 01:04:40,440
Speaker 3: now I'm like.

1411
01:04:41,080 --> 01:04:45,880
Speaker 5: It's about growth exactly and change being okay and you

1412
01:04:46,120 --> 01:04:48,320
Speaker 5: being consistent with it afterwards and.

1413
01:04:48,440 --> 01:04:51,080
Speaker 6: Realizing that it does matter the people you're around, and

1414
01:04:51,280 --> 01:04:53,120
Speaker 6: that the energy that you're absorbing.

1415
01:04:53,520 --> 01:04:58,280
Speaker 5: Yeah, because your people say about not just like I guess,

1416
01:04:58,360 --> 01:05:01,920
Speaker 5: not just people. Women are culture thinks it's okay to

1417
01:05:02,000 --> 01:05:04,040
Speaker 5: say about just anyone.

1418
01:05:04,200 --> 01:05:06,280
Speaker 3: It's not okay. They have like no filter in our culture.

1419
01:05:06,320 --> 01:05:11,280
Speaker 4: You know, Natasha's here doing this Hannah on Jamila and

1420
01:05:11,360 --> 01:05:12,840
Speaker 4: it is gorgeous.

1421
01:05:13,440 --> 01:05:17,800
Speaker 5: People can actually still draw after and where's your phone?

1422
01:05:17,800 --> 01:05:20,320
Speaker 3: I took a picture, so let her finish, but I

1423
01:05:20,400 --> 01:05:21,640
Speaker 3: just want to take what sure doing it too?

1424
01:05:21,800 --> 01:05:24,760
Speaker 5: Okay? You take a video a video of a video I.

1425
01:05:24,880 --> 01:05:28,920
Speaker 3: Mean, this video is too far. I know you can

1426
01:05:28,960 --> 01:05:29,320
Speaker 3: cut off.

1427
01:05:30,520 --> 01:05:32,440
Speaker 4: I have a question, do you think what do you

1428
01:05:32,520 --> 01:05:35,560
Speaker 4: think your daughter will identify as? Do you think she'll

1429
01:05:35,600 --> 01:05:38,920
Speaker 4: be I'm Birachel, I'm like Harris.

1430
01:05:39,360 --> 01:05:43,760
Speaker 5: Huh, Kamala Harrisamala harrismala ha. Yeah, she's a mix.

1431
01:05:44,080 --> 01:05:47,080
Speaker 3: I just want to because, like you know, as a society,

1432
01:05:47,120 --> 01:05:48,360
Speaker 3: we love to put labels on things.

1433
01:05:48,720 --> 01:05:50,720
Speaker 5: You know, I feel like the world, first off, not

1434
01:05:50,920 --> 01:05:54,280
Speaker 5: just Kamala Harris, like the world. I feel like it

1435
01:05:54,360 --> 01:05:58,760
Speaker 5: is going to be brown already and it's so beautiful

1436
01:05:59,120 --> 01:06:01,320
Speaker 5: and I do feel like it's going to be easier.

1437
01:06:01,680 --> 01:06:03,840
Speaker 3: But I also do worry about our generation too.

1438
01:06:03,960 --> 01:06:07,840
Speaker 5: To make sure my people are not going to tease

1439
01:06:07,880 --> 01:06:12,520
Speaker 5: her being of Indian descent and of African American descent,

1440
01:06:12,600 --> 01:06:14,440
Speaker 5: Like are they going to say, like, you're not really Indian?

1441
01:06:14,520 --> 01:06:16,680
Speaker 3: You know, to her? Is she going to be teased?

1442
01:06:16,720 --> 01:06:19,600
Speaker 3: And of what culture? What side is it going to be?

1443
01:06:20,120 --> 01:06:22,560
Speaker 5: And because bullying still does happen, it still exists, how

1444
01:06:22,560 --> 01:06:23,520
Speaker 5: are you going to deal with that? How are we

1445
01:06:23,520 --> 01:06:24,840
Speaker 5: going to deal with it? And how am I going

1446
01:06:24,880 --> 01:06:27,880
Speaker 5: to make this woman a strong woman? And all I'm

1447
01:06:27,920 --> 01:06:30,160
Speaker 5: trying to do is talk about everything that I said today,

1448
01:06:30,280 --> 01:06:33,920
Speaker 5: like surrounding myself by good women, standing by what I

1449
01:06:34,080 --> 01:06:37,240
Speaker 5: believe in and things that I want them to be around.

1450
01:06:37,320 --> 01:06:39,280
Speaker 5: And again, if we are around people that I still

1451
01:06:39,360 --> 01:06:41,240
Speaker 5: love very much and they say something that I don't like,

1452
01:06:41,440 --> 01:06:43,640
Speaker 5: doesn't mean they're a bad person. It just means I

1453
01:06:43,680 --> 01:06:45,520
Speaker 5: don't stand for that, and we don't have to be

1454
01:06:45,560 --> 01:06:48,120
Speaker 5: around them all the time. But she'll know, like the

1455
01:06:48,240 --> 01:06:51,000
Speaker 5: difference in this core group of people that is a

1456
01:06:51,080 --> 01:06:53,600
Speaker 5: reflection of me, and hopefully that rips off on her.

1457
01:06:53,640 --> 01:06:55,720
Speaker 5: And that's the best that I can do, because I

1458
01:06:55,760 --> 01:06:57,680
Speaker 5: can't control what she's going to see as soon as

1459
01:06:57,720 --> 01:07:00,680
Speaker 5: she walks out my door, right And and I also

1460
01:07:00,840 --> 01:07:02,920
Speaker 5: know you can't really tell your kids what to do.

1461
01:07:03,480 --> 01:07:04,360
Speaker 3: You have to show them.

1462
01:07:04,520 --> 01:07:07,360
Speaker 5: Like I get asked all the time, like how are

1463
01:07:07,440 --> 01:07:10,360
Speaker 5: you awake three hours a day? I mean just sleeping

1464
01:07:10,400 --> 01:07:12,200
Speaker 5: three hours a day and work all the time. It's

1465
01:07:12,200 --> 01:07:15,120
Speaker 5: because I saw my mom and dad work all day long.

1466
01:07:15,200 --> 01:07:17,560
Speaker 5: It's because I saw my dad barely sleep and work

1467
01:07:18,080 --> 01:07:20,480
Speaker 5: and it being normal and that's all they do. And

1468
01:07:20,600 --> 01:07:22,880
Speaker 5: so I feel like that's my normal and that's what

1469
01:07:23,000 --> 01:07:25,160
Speaker 5: I should be doing. But if I didn't see that, honestly,

1470
01:07:25,640 --> 01:07:27,520
Speaker 5: I wouldn't be the way that I am. I had

1471
01:07:27,560 --> 01:07:30,760
Speaker 5: to go to him, like work with him in the

1472
01:07:30,880 --> 01:07:32,680
Speaker 5: day job and when he was a janitor at night

1473
01:07:32,760 --> 01:07:35,280
Speaker 5: and sit in the cafeteria until he was done and

1474
01:07:35,440 --> 01:07:39,880
Speaker 5: actually help him physically. And that was engraved into my body.

1475
01:07:40,080 --> 01:07:41,720
Speaker 5: And that's what you should do with your children, like

1476
01:07:41,760 --> 01:07:43,360
Speaker 5: take them into work with you. I s already started

1477
01:07:43,360 --> 01:07:45,959
Speaker 5: taking am to work with me, and she sees Mama

1478
01:07:46,040 --> 01:07:47,960
Speaker 5: working all day long, and she sees Mama doing like

1479
01:07:48,080 --> 01:07:51,200
Speaker 5: aunties at home and threading their face and stuff. Mama's working,

1480
01:07:51,240 --> 01:07:53,080
Speaker 5: and I hope it rubs off on her. And that's

1481
01:07:53,640 --> 01:07:55,040
Speaker 5: that's all I'm trying to do.

1482
01:07:55,400 --> 01:07:58,240
Speaker 3: I know, And that's wonderful, that's so hoo.

1483
01:07:58,400 --> 01:08:00,840
Speaker 6: And like, yeah, mom, more was hard, and that's why

1484
01:08:00,920 --> 01:08:02,840
Speaker 6: sometimes I feel bad taking Luna with me too.

1485
01:08:03,240 --> 01:08:05,920
Speaker 3: But I also like, I like, she knows what's going on,

1486
01:08:06,080 --> 01:08:07,320
Speaker 3: and so I have to go to work. So do

1487
01:08:07,360 --> 01:08:08,400
Speaker 3: you want to do this? You want to do that,

1488
01:08:08,480 --> 01:08:09,120
Speaker 3: you want to come with me?

1489
01:08:09,160 --> 01:08:11,520
Speaker 6: I give her the option, but she knows, you know,

1490
01:08:12,160 --> 01:08:14,200
Speaker 6: that's I never thought about it that way. But the

1491
01:08:14,280 --> 01:08:16,040
Speaker 6: fact that you saw your parents and you went to

1492
01:08:16,120 --> 01:08:17,519
Speaker 6: work with them and you know what I mean, Like

1493
01:08:17,600 --> 01:08:20,120
Speaker 6: it's so deeply instilled in you from.

1494
01:08:20,040 --> 01:08:23,439
Speaker 5: Another country too, seeing that too, like making it over,

1495
01:08:24,960 --> 01:08:27,959
Speaker 5: just surviving and yeah, it's just very inspiring.

1496
01:08:30,080 --> 01:08:31,960
Speaker 3: Yeah, thank god.

1497
01:08:32,120 --> 01:08:35,280
Speaker 4: More so, we're heading towards towards a place and I

1498
01:08:35,320 --> 01:08:38,000
Speaker 4: think we are in a place where women are working more.

1499
01:08:38,040 --> 01:08:40,599
Speaker 4: I mean when we're having babies later because they're putting

1500
01:08:40,600 --> 01:08:42,879
Speaker 4: their careers first, because they're taking their time.

1501
01:08:44,080 --> 01:08:47,519
Speaker 3: And like, you know, all those things are changing, and

1502
01:08:47,640 --> 01:08:52,160
Speaker 3: like so kids can see their their mom working, you

1503
01:08:52,320 --> 01:08:52,840
Speaker 3: know what I mean.

1504
01:08:53,520 --> 01:08:56,400
Speaker 5: I like that too. You know a lot of people

1505
01:08:56,479 --> 01:08:57,960
Speaker 5: ask me that I don't know if this is like

1506
01:08:58,000 --> 01:08:59,360
Speaker 5: a question that you guys want to talk about, but

1507
01:09:00,080 --> 01:09:02,160
Speaker 5: I can also ask all the time. They're like, you know,

1508
01:09:02,280 --> 01:09:04,000
Speaker 5: or is it an issue that you guys are not

1509
01:09:04,160 --> 01:09:07,000
Speaker 5: like together, you know, me and Joseph, And is it

1510
01:09:07,040 --> 01:09:08,519
Speaker 5: hard being a single pitter? And I'm like, we're not

1511
01:09:08,560 --> 01:09:10,719
Speaker 5: single parent we're co parenting. You know, it's really great.

1512
01:09:11,040 --> 01:09:12,720
Speaker 5: But I'm really glad that I did have a baby.

1513
01:09:12,800 --> 01:09:14,160
Speaker 5: No matter if this works out or not, I'm really

1514
01:09:14,160 --> 01:09:17,479
Speaker 5: glad that I did. And there's not wrong, nothing wrong

1515
01:09:17,560 --> 01:09:21,400
Speaker 5: by having it later. But hearing women that are elder

1516
01:09:21,560 --> 01:09:24,280
Speaker 5: that are struggling and having a baby and putting their

1517
01:09:24,280 --> 01:09:27,840
Speaker 5: eggs aside, and they're spending thousands and thousands of dollars,

1518
01:09:28,280 --> 01:09:31,200
Speaker 5: like emptying out their bank account to have another baby.

1519
01:09:31,960 --> 01:09:32,960
Speaker 3: Is that worth it later?

1520
01:09:33,360 --> 01:09:36,120
Speaker 5: And then your child doesn't even see you build your

1521
01:09:36,240 --> 01:09:40,240
Speaker 5: career better, and then they're suffering mentally because everything's just

1522
01:09:41,040 --> 01:09:43,200
Speaker 5: kind of handed down to them, but not handed down

1523
01:09:43,200 --> 01:09:43,360
Speaker 5: to it.

1524
01:09:43,479 --> 01:09:47,280
Speaker 3: But yes, it really is versus. I'm actually glad that

1525
01:09:47,400 --> 01:09:49,120
Speaker 3: I had a baby now at a young age.

1526
01:09:49,160 --> 01:09:51,240
Speaker 5: I'm probably wouldn't think this until I had her, and

1527
01:09:51,320 --> 01:09:54,559
Speaker 5: it is very hard at this age, but I'm glad.

1528
01:09:54,600 --> 01:09:56,559
Speaker 5: I'm that can see me working. I'm glad she can

1529
01:09:56,600 --> 01:09:58,920
Speaker 5: see this process and I can. It's something that she

1530
01:09:59,280 --> 01:10:01,320
Speaker 5: needs to learn that mom's going to be around and

1531
01:10:01,400 --> 01:10:02,160
Speaker 5: she's not going.

1532
01:10:02,040 --> 01:10:02,559
Speaker 3: To be around.

1533
01:10:02,920 --> 01:10:05,360
Speaker 5: Like all of these things are very important to install

1534
01:10:05,479 --> 01:10:08,280
Speaker 5: into her right now because of separation, anxiety, and just

1535
01:10:08,400 --> 01:10:12,280
Speaker 5: surviving in this world alone. Like so, I don't know,

1536
01:10:12,680 --> 01:10:14,320
Speaker 5: I don't feel like there's no right or wrong, but

1537
01:10:14,640 --> 01:10:16,920
Speaker 5: observing it from two different persons, I didn't.

1538
01:10:16,640 --> 01:10:17,400
Speaker 3: Think about it that way.

1539
01:10:17,400 --> 01:10:19,800
Speaker 4: That's such an interesting perspective, and now that I'm thinking

1540
01:10:19,840 --> 01:10:20,799
Speaker 4: about it, I feel.

1541
01:10:20,560 --> 01:10:22,880
Speaker 5: Like you're right, Like, I don't know, I don't know

1542
01:10:23,240 --> 01:10:25,320
Speaker 5: what's right or wrong. I just after I have my

1543
01:10:25,400 --> 01:10:27,479
Speaker 5: mom's one of fifteen siblings, and my dad's when I'm eight.

1544
01:10:27,920 --> 01:10:30,320
Speaker 5: So I'm just listening to my family and just sharing,

1545
01:10:32,240 --> 01:10:32,679
Speaker 5: just sharing.

1546
01:10:32,840 --> 01:10:33,880
Speaker 3: So but no, I think it's.

1547
01:10:33,720 --> 01:10:36,080
Speaker 4: Important to see her, for your kids to see, to

1548
01:10:36,200 --> 01:10:40,360
Speaker 4: see their parents working, especially moms, you know, and especially girls.

1549
01:10:40,920 --> 01:10:41,080
Speaker 4: You know.

1550
01:10:41,240 --> 01:10:43,160
Speaker 3: I think it's really it's crucial.

1551
01:10:43,400 --> 01:10:46,360
Speaker 4: It definitely shaped me, for sure, and I've seen how

1552
01:10:46,400 --> 01:10:49,519
Speaker 4: it's shaped other people, like the opposite, like like friends

1553
01:10:49,560 --> 01:10:53,240
Speaker 4: whose parents like didn't work very hard or kind of

1554
01:10:53,280 --> 01:10:54,840
Speaker 4: always figuring shit out, like.

1555
01:10:55,520 --> 01:10:58,320
Speaker 3: You know what I mean, and like it's just it's

1556
01:10:58,400 --> 01:10:59,280
Speaker 3: just it's just different.

1557
01:10:59,280 --> 01:11:01,200
Speaker 4: It doesn't matter matter like what kind of job your

1558
01:11:01,280 --> 01:11:03,519
Speaker 4: parent had, as long as you saw that working hard.

1559
01:11:03,800 --> 01:11:05,960
Speaker 5: You know, totally, it's worth that thing that you're installing

1560
01:11:06,040 --> 01:11:08,679
Speaker 5: into that very Yeah, yeah, exactly.

1561
01:11:10,200 --> 01:11:12,519
Speaker 3: Should we do a question? Should we read a question

1562
01:11:12,640 --> 01:11:13,439
Speaker 3: and then we wrap it up?

1563
01:11:14,120 --> 01:11:17,639
Speaker 4: Yeah, so we get one you get, we get people

1564
01:11:17,680 --> 01:11:22,280
Speaker 4: that submit questions to us, and should we do the

1565
01:11:22,360 --> 01:11:24,280
Speaker 4: one the one that we just got in our email?

1566
01:11:24,439 --> 01:11:28,040
Speaker 3: Okay, so this is a question that came through for Yeah.

1567
01:11:27,880 --> 01:11:29,400
Speaker 4: This is the This is the question that came through

1568
01:11:29,439 --> 01:11:35,400
Speaker 4: from one of our listeners. Okay, Anonymous, I'm thirty turning

1569
01:11:35,479 --> 01:11:37,639
Speaker 4: thirty one in May, but I still feel so childlike

1570
01:11:37,680 --> 01:11:40,320
Speaker 4: when it comes to managing my life. Crazy since I'm

1571
01:11:40,320 --> 01:11:42,920
Speaker 4: a mom of two. How do you, ladies, own your

1572
01:11:43,000 --> 01:11:46,000
Speaker 4: shit but also feel confident in your decisions. Do you

1573
01:11:46,120 --> 01:11:49,879
Speaker 4: ever feel that the scrutiny and opinions of those closest

1574
01:11:49,920 --> 01:11:52,000
Speaker 4: to you affect how you decide to move or make

1575
01:11:52,040 --> 01:11:56,120
Speaker 4: decisions in your life. I'm absolutely working on embracing long question,

1576
01:11:56,360 --> 01:12:00,679
Speaker 4: embracing well, I'm definitely working on embrace seeing the fuck

1577
01:12:00,760 --> 01:12:01,519
Speaker 4: what people think.

1578
01:12:02,040 --> 01:12:04,760
Speaker 3: But it's mentality, but it's hard as fuck.

1579
01:12:04,920 --> 01:12:05,160
Speaker 5: Again.

1580
01:12:05,240 --> 01:12:08,720
Speaker 3: Love you guys so much. We love you too. We

1581
01:12:08,840 --> 01:12:12,040
Speaker 3: love you. Oh yeah, now I remember discussion because were

1582
01:12:12,040 --> 01:12:17,040
Speaker 3: writing the car. We read this and I said, have

1583
01:12:17,160 --> 01:12:17,920
Speaker 3: you gotten there yet?

1584
01:12:19,479 --> 01:12:20,639
Speaker 5: I also feel childlike?

1585
01:12:20,720 --> 01:12:23,320
Speaker 6: I also we were just talking about before we started,

1586
01:12:23,360 --> 01:12:26,520
Speaker 6: like I can't believe about someone's mom and I'm completerly

1587
01:12:26,840 --> 01:12:29,759
Speaker 6: in control of someone's whole life being for the rest.

1588
01:12:29,600 --> 01:12:32,719
Speaker 3: Of my life. It's like I feel inadequate, Saily.

1589
01:12:36,840 --> 01:12:41,800
Speaker 6: I struggle with this because I'm a wild card, a

1590
01:12:41,880 --> 01:12:45,760
Speaker 6: little I'm very free spirited, and I've had very I mean,

1591
01:12:45,760 --> 01:12:48,520
Speaker 6: I don't know, like most people are probably more conservative

1592
01:12:48,600 --> 01:12:51,440
Speaker 6: than me in general, but I've also.

1593
01:12:51,400 --> 01:12:53,679
Speaker 5: Always kind of been like, I don't give a fuck.

1594
01:12:54,439 --> 01:12:56,760
Speaker 3: This is who I am, because mostly I can't help it,

1595
01:12:57,520 --> 01:13:03,160
Speaker 3: and I just think, come. I mean, there's always oh yeah,

1596
01:13:03,160 --> 01:13:04,360
Speaker 3: I had of time for oh.

1597
01:13:04,320 --> 01:13:08,120
Speaker 5: Sorry, okay now, miss.

1598
01:13:12,479 --> 01:13:15,400
Speaker 3: Yay. I just feel like.

1599
01:13:16,960 --> 01:13:19,519
Speaker 6: There's comes a point in your adulthood where you have

1600
01:13:19,760 --> 01:13:23,120
Speaker 6: to stop. You can't please everyone, so you have to

1601
01:13:23,160 --> 01:13:26,519
Speaker 6: please your fucking self, and you'll find your like the

1602
01:13:26,960 --> 01:13:30,240
Speaker 6: most peace and the most happiness when you realize you

1603
01:13:30,320 --> 01:13:32,439
Speaker 6: cannot please everyone else and you just have to be

1604
01:13:32,560 --> 01:13:36,719
Speaker 6: confident and okay with whatever it is that you decide

1605
01:13:36,760 --> 01:13:40,160
Speaker 6: to do and know that people are gonna judge you

1606
01:13:40,760 --> 01:13:41,240
Speaker 6: either way.

1607
01:13:42,960 --> 01:13:51,360
Speaker 3: Erica, Yes, I agree. I think I struggle with this

1608
01:13:51,600 --> 01:13:53,120
Speaker 3: right now all the time.

1609
01:13:53,400 --> 01:13:56,680
Speaker 4: Actually, in some ways, some ways I'm really good at

1610
01:13:56,760 --> 01:13:59,840
Speaker 4: not giving a fuck, and then in other ways I

1611
01:14:00,040 --> 01:14:00,519
Speaker 4: give a fuck.

1612
01:14:01,200 --> 01:14:02,799
Speaker 3: So I feel you, I understand.

1613
01:14:03,040 --> 01:14:05,400
Speaker 4: I think you kind of have to like have those

1614
01:14:05,439 --> 01:14:07,560
Speaker 4: talks with you yourself and be like, what am I

1615
01:14:07,720 --> 01:14:10,559
Speaker 4: losing for if by not giving a fuck?

1616
01:14:11,200 --> 01:14:12,439
Speaker 3: You know what I mean? Nothing.

1617
01:14:12,760 --> 01:14:15,880
Speaker 4: For the most part, most people would say, you know,

1618
01:14:16,000 --> 01:14:19,479
Speaker 4: maybe maybe they're family, maybe like you. Maybe like for example,

1619
01:14:19,560 --> 01:14:22,120
Speaker 4: like you, like you know, you're come from a background

1620
01:14:22,200 --> 01:14:22,519
Speaker 4: that's you.

1621
01:14:22,520 --> 01:14:23,599
Speaker 3: Know, pretty conservative.

1622
01:14:23,640 --> 01:14:26,680
Speaker 4: I would yeah, right, And I know a lot of

1623
01:14:26,760 --> 01:14:29,720
Speaker 4: times in your culture and many cultures, if you go

1624
01:14:29,840 --> 01:14:34,280
Speaker 4: against what is considered normal or appropriate, you can be

1625
01:14:35,200 --> 01:14:39,800
Speaker 4: disowned in some capacity. Absolutely, And that's that's really hard.

1626
01:14:40,040 --> 01:14:43,439
Speaker 4: Like I can't imagine like having to make that, having

1627
01:14:43,479 --> 01:14:46,000
Speaker 4: to make that decision. But most of the time that's

1628
01:14:46,080 --> 01:14:48,679
Speaker 4: not the case. So what do you have to lose?

1629
01:14:49,240 --> 01:14:52,640
Speaker 3: You know, what do you really have to lose? I

1630
01:14:52,720 --> 01:15:00,560
Speaker 3: don't know if there's an actual concert like step one, no,

1631
01:15:01,120 --> 01:15:04,000
Speaker 3: you know, you just got to decide. Oh my goodness,

1632
01:15:04,479 --> 01:15:07,480
Speaker 3: I'm gonna live for myself. I'm going to live too.

1633
01:15:08,280 --> 01:15:11,760
Speaker 6: And once you decide, just like that day where you

1634
01:15:12,000 --> 01:15:14,559
Speaker 6: decided you're going to wake up and show your mom

1635
01:15:14,640 --> 01:15:17,160
Speaker 6: the weed, Yeah, you were going to like step out

1636
01:15:17,200 --> 01:15:17,759
Speaker 6: of your comfort.

1637
01:15:17,880 --> 01:15:21,120
Speaker 5: I just couldn't handle anymore, like any more. Anxiety it's

1638
01:15:21,160 --> 01:15:24,320
Speaker 5: a feeling, it's a it's energy, it's I couldn't do

1639
01:15:24,400 --> 01:15:28,960
Speaker 5: it anymore. And after being a mom, you you girls

1640
01:15:29,000 --> 01:15:32,479
Speaker 5: can probably relate to this you just can't make room

1641
01:15:32,640 --> 01:15:35,640
Speaker 5: for there's no room, there's a room coming out and

1642
01:15:35,920 --> 01:15:38,200
Speaker 5: like being you know, one of the first Indian women

1643
01:15:38,479 --> 01:15:41,519
Speaker 5: in the world actually to talk about cannabis and be

1644
01:15:41,560 --> 01:15:44,200
Speaker 5: an advocate for it. I heard and still do here

1645
01:15:44,320 --> 01:15:47,280
Speaker 5: some crazy things like that you get like a bad mom.

1646
01:15:47,960 --> 01:15:50,000
Speaker 5: Oh yeah, there's dms like you're saying that you're a

1647
01:15:50,160 --> 01:15:52,360
Speaker 5: bad mom and Amritha's going to be retarded when she

1648
01:15:52,479 --> 01:15:55,560
Speaker 5: grows up, but is of you smoking around her and

1649
01:15:55,640 --> 01:15:58,040
Speaker 5: she's smelling it all day and like you're a disgrace

1650
01:15:58,080 --> 01:16:01,880
Speaker 5: to our culture. I've heard, Oh my gosh, you're not

1651
01:16:02,400 --> 01:16:04,160
Speaker 5: You're not a sing? Are you really a sing?

1652
01:16:04,439 --> 01:16:04,479
Speaker 2: Like?

1653
01:16:05,120 --> 01:16:05,799
Speaker 5: Are you Indian?

1654
01:16:06,400 --> 01:16:06,560
Speaker 4: You know?

1655
01:16:07,360 --> 01:16:11,120
Speaker 5: They it's just the lack of my last name. Am

1656
01:16:11,160 --> 01:16:13,000
Speaker 5: I really it's a very. It's like a smith, you

1657
01:16:13,080 --> 01:16:16,360
Speaker 5: know for American in the American world, but it's a

1658
01:16:16,479 --> 01:16:21,519
Speaker 5: very in the cast system. I guess it's very high up.

1659
01:16:22,479 --> 01:16:23,519
Speaker 5: It's a very croud name.

1660
01:16:23,600 --> 01:16:24,280
Speaker 3: I was going to say.

1661
01:16:25,000 --> 01:16:27,400
Speaker 5: And so you know, they're like, you're know your disgrace

1662
01:16:27,520 --> 01:16:29,519
Speaker 5: and things like that, and it's terrible.

1663
01:16:30,120 --> 01:16:35,559
Speaker 4: I was when I was researching, you know, suicide and everything,

1664
01:16:35,640 --> 01:16:38,679
Speaker 4: it was saying that like so many of the world's

1665
01:16:38,680 --> 01:16:39,880
Speaker 4: suicides come from India.

1666
01:16:40,280 --> 01:16:43,160
Speaker 5: There's a lot in the world's high suicidal, right.

1667
01:16:43,720 --> 01:16:46,280
Speaker 4: Yeah, And I think it's probably a lack of like

1668
01:16:47,160 --> 01:16:49,960
Speaker 4: talking about mental health and shame and not being.

1669
01:16:49,840 --> 01:16:50,720
Speaker 3: Able to express that.

1670
01:16:51,640 --> 01:16:56,200
Speaker 4: And I mean and also I found out a lot

1671
01:16:56,240 --> 01:16:58,760
Speaker 4: of that and the cast system playing into that too,

1672
01:16:59,080 --> 01:17:02,360
Speaker 4: like you know, like you going outside of your cast system,

1673
01:17:02,520 --> 01:17:05,800
Speaker 4: you know, could get you disown killed or disown you're

1674
01:17:05,840 --> 01:17:10,120
Speaker 4: not killed, right or Yeah, like arranged marriage and arranged marriages.

1675
01:17:10,120 --> 01:17:14,080
Speaker 3: I mean the little girls are you know India, Yes,

1676
01:17:14,360 --> 01:17:15,280
Speaker 3: ending their lives.

1677
01:17:15,080 --> 01:17:17,240
Speaker 4: Because they don't want to marry old men or whatever,

1678
01:17:17,439 --> 01:17:19,240
Speaker 4: you know, or the man they they're in love with

1679
01:17:19,360 --> 01:17:19,880
Speaker 4: someone else.

1680
01:17:20,360 --> 01:17:22,080
Speaker 3: I think it has to do with like arranged marriage.

1681
01:17:22,320 --> 01:17:23,240
Speaker 5: Yeah. Period.

1682
01:17:23,600 --> 01:17:26,679
Speaker 4: I feel like I've ranged some arranged marriages work really well,

1683
01:17:27,120 --> 01:17:30,599
Speaker 4: Like I've heard them being like really working really well.

1684
01:17:30,680 --> 01:17:32,200
Speaker 5: And then you know, some of them don't.

1685
01:17:32,200 --> 01:17:32,240
Speaker 4: Know.

1686
01:17:32,320 --> 01:17:35,680
Speaker 5: It's just like every relationship, it's very hit and miss.

1687
01:17:35,840 --> 01:17:38,280
Speaker 5: But I mean, after even hearing all of this stuff,

1688
01:17:38,360 --> 01:17:40,000
Speaker 5: I had to do. What made me happy at the

1689
01:17:40,080 --> 01:17:42,839
Speaker 5: end of it, and honestly is after having the acceptance

1690
01:17:42,880 --> 01:17:43,360
Speaker 5: of my parents.

1691
01:17:45,080 --> 01:17:46,880
Speaker 3: They were Yeah, they only knew.

1692
01:17:46,720 --> 01:17:49,640
Speaker 5: Each other for actually three days, wow.

1693
01:17:50,240 --> 01:17:51,160
Speaker 3: And then they got married.

1694
01:17:51,800 --> 01:17:58,240
Speaker 5: And then my dad came from Beachy and like so

1695
01:17:58,320 --> 01:18:02,120
Speaker 5: they started dating and they fell love. So she was

1696
01:18:02,640 --> 01:18:04,640
Speaker 5: in India and he was in Fiji or the other

1697
01:18:04,680 --> 01:18:06,240
Speaker 5: way around. Did I say India Fiji?

1698
01:18:06,520 --> 01:18:06,840
Speaker 3: Fiji?

1699
01:18:06,920 --> 01:18:08,719
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, Fiji island. No, No, you said Fiji.

1700
01:18:08,760 --> 01:18:11,160
Speaker 3: Okay, good, So you're both your parents are from Fiji. Yeah,

1701
01:18:11,160 --> 01:18:12,240
Speaker 3: they're from Fiji islands.

1702
01:18:12,280 --> 01:18:15,599
Speaker 5: There's actually a huge, huge East Indian population in Fiji

1703
01:18:16,200 --> 01:18:18,680
Speaker 5: from all of because British tik Us over with the

1704
01:18:18,720 --> 01:18:20,439
Speaker 5: agreement agreement and that's.

1705
01:18:20,360 --> 01:18:23,519
Speaker 3: Like, was that like growing up on the island of Fiji,

1706
01:18:23,680 --> 01:18:25,000
Speaker 3: and I mean for them beautiful.

1707
01:18:25,160 --> 01:18:27,960
Speaker 5: I mean they were working on the sugar plantation that

1708
01:18:27,960 --> 01:18:30,719
Speaker 5: a lot of workers came from Fiji for that reason.

1709
01:18:31,040 --> 01:18:32,840
Speaker 3: So that's kind of like how it all started. And

1710
01:18:34,120 --> 01:18:35,800
Speaker 3: I think I think this is correct.

1711
01:18:35,840 --> 01:18:38,759
Speaker 5: Like the Fiji Hindi language, that's what we speak, a dialect,

1712
01:18:38,800 --> 01:18:42,520
Speaker 5: but it's like a mix of all different kinds of languages.

1713
01:18:43,320 --> 01:18:45,640
Speaker 5: It's like if you know the Punjabi language and then

1714
01:18:45,720 --> 01:18:49,040
Speaker 5: you have Urdu, and then you have Arabic and then

1715
01:18:49,120 --> 01:18:52,560
Speaker 5: you have Demil and like Hindi and the Fiji and

1716
01:18:53,120 --> 01:18:56,960
Speaker 5: Indian languages of that because we came from all different

1717
01:18:57,040 --> 01:18:59,880
Speaker 5: parts of India. And my last name is Singh because

1718
01:18:59,920 --> 01:19:03,360
Speaker 5: my dad is from My dad's dad was born and

1719
01:19:03,560 --> 01:19:07,280
Speaker 5: raised in fun Job and so it's very cool to

1720
01:19:07,600 --> 01:19:10,000
Speaker 5: like educate people that half of the island or almost

1721
01:19:10,040 --> 01:19:12,479
Speaker 5: half of it is actually Indian and you get Indian

1722
01:19:12,560 --> 01:19:16,120
Speaker 5: food and clothes and there's so many you know there.

1723
01:19:16,240 --> 01:19:19,200
Speaker 5: So yes, that's where both my parents were born. And

1724
01:19:19,880 --> 01:19:22,560
Speaker 5: they knew of each other before, and you know, but

1725
01:19:22,720 --> 01:19:26,720
Speaker 5: they met face to face only for a few days.

1726
01:19:27,600 --> 01:19:28,320
Speaker 3: But they're still.

1727
01:19:28,120 --> 01:19:30,840
Speaker 5: Happily married today and there's still flirt and stuff and

1728
01:19:31,600 --> 01:19:34,080
Speaker 5: sometimes I'm like ew, but you know, they went through

1729
01:19:34,080 --> 01:19:35,920
Speaker 5: their ups and downs too, and we did see that

1730
01:19:36,040 --> 01:19:39,840
Speaker 5: and it wasn't like picture perfect, but they're still married

1731
01:19:39,960 --> 01:19:41,160
Speaker 5: and together and happy.

1732
01:19:42,040 --> 01:19:45,680
Speaker 3: Were they disappointed that you were pregnant before.

1733
01:19:45,439 --> 01:19:50,400
Speaker 5: You great question. No, I don't think I've ever heard

1734
01:19:50,479 --> 01:19:54,400
Speaker 5: my mom so happy because me and a Martha dad

1735
01:19:54,479 --> 01:19:57,160
Speaker 5: were together like for a very long time after that,

1736
01:19:57,600 --> 01:20:01,360
Speaker 5: I mean before that, like five years almost, so she

1737
01:20:01,600 --> 01:20:04,479
Speaker 5: was very happy with it. And she's again it was

1738
01:20:04,520 --> 01:20:08,920
Speaker 5: all about me being happy and being okay, and they

1739
01:20:08,960 --> 01:20:12,840
Speaker 5: were okay. My parents are a very different breed. Sounds like, well,

1740
01:20:13,000 --> 01:20:18,000
Speaker 5: like they're very understanding. I mean they do come around

1741
01:20:18,160 --> 01:20:20,760
Speaker 5: and you know half fear of judgment and things like that,

1742
01:20:20,960 --> 01:20:22,920
Speaker 5: or you know, say like don't smoke here or things

1743
01:20:23,000 --> 01:20:23,559
Speaker 5: like that, but.

1744
01:20:25,560 --> 01:20:27,760
Speaker 3: They're very accepting or trying to be.

1745
01:20:28,120 --> 01:20:32,519
Speaker 5: And I think after just seeing the experiences that I've

1746
01:20:32,560 --> 01:20:36,839
Speaker 5: gone through with so many debts, and I even explained

1747
01:20:36,840 --> 01:20:38,800
Speaker 5: to my mom, you know, the man that I found

1748
01:20:39,479 --> 01:20:41,640
Speaker 5: on Father's Day, he was an Indian man, he was

1749
01:20:41,680 --> 01:20:46,200
Speaker 5: the only child, and it broke my heart that he

1750
01:20:46,240 --> 01:20:49,240
Speaker 5: took his life on Father's Day, and I you know,

1751
01:20:49,320 --> 01:20:51,840
Speaker 5: explained to him like that. I'm just thankful for them

1752
01:20:52,080 --> 01:20:54,960
Speaker 5: being such open parents, and I think reminding them of

1753
01:20:55,080 --> 01:20:59,120
Speaker 5: that helps them do that because it really helps us live,

1754
01:21:00,200 --> 01:21:03,479
Speaker 5: like truthfully live another day. And even if we do

1755
01:21:03,640 --> 01:21:06,479
Speaker 5: have dark moments, we know that our parents are going

1756
01:21:06,560 --> 01:21:08,240
Speaker 5: to be there and we can like go go to

1757
01:21:08,320 --> 01:21:10,679
Speaker 5: them for that. And I hope one day all Indian

1758
01:21:10,760 --> 01:21:14,240
Speaker 5: parents create this platform for their kids because it's super important.

1759
01:21:14,400 --> 01:21:16,640
Speaker 5: Like it's not about going to school to be a

1760
01:21:16,680 --> 01:21:18,560
Speaker 5: doctor or a lawyer all the time. They might not

1761
01:21:18,640 --> 01:21:21,120
Speaker 5: be happy doing that, or if your son or daughter

1762
01:21:21,360 --> 01:21:23,920
Speaker 5: is gay, like you're going to have to come to

1763
01:21:24,080 --> 01:21:26,800
Speaker 5: terms of that. Like actually, two weeks ago there was

1764
01:21:27,240 --> 01:21:30,640
Speaker 5: the first Indian a girl to girl Bollywood movie, and

1765
01:21:30,760 --> 01:21:33,479
Speaker 5: I thought it was so amazing to see that because

1766
01:21:33,520 --> 01:21:38,360
Speaker 5: there's so many women that are just trapped and that's

1767
01:21:38,520 --> 01:21:40,639
Speaker 5: what they want and that's what's going to keep them happy,

1768
01:21:40,800 --> 01:21:42,680
Speaker 5: like they need. People need to talk about it more

1769
01:21:42,720 --> 01:21:45,960
Speaker 5: in our culture especially, so I think it's just a

1770
01:21:46,080 --> 01:21:49,439
Speaker 5: very slow thing and with everything and cannabis is definitely

1771
01:21:49,520 --> 01:21:54,599
Speaker 5: going to be a very slow process. But the more research,

1772
01:21:54,680 --> 01:21:56,680
Speaker 5: the more results we have, the faster this process is

1773
01:21:56,760 --> 01:21:57,120
Speaker 5: going to go.

1774
01:21:59,240 --> 01:22:04,880
Speaker 6: Oh, being authentic is liberating and can in some ways

1775
01:22:04,960 --> 01:22:09,280
Speaker 6: be revolutionary, and in any ways, in every way, in

1776
01:22:09,439 --> 01:22:14,200
Speaker 6: every way, in everywhere, being authentic is revolutionary.

1777
01:22:14,960 --> 01:22:17,000
Speaker 5: Just share your story, is what I keep saying to people.

1778
01:22:17,080 --> 01:22:19,200
Speaker 5: Everyone always asks like, how are you doing? How are

1779
01:22:19,200 --> 01:22:21,040
Speaker 5: you getting to the cannabis industry. I'm literally just sharing

1780
01:22:21,040 --> 01:22:23,680
Speaker 5: my experience. That's all I do this whole time. And

1781
01:22:23,880 --> 01:22:25,400
Speaker 5: that's why it's so easy to just talk about it

1782
01:22:25,479 --> 01:22:26,960
Speaker 5: really because it's my life. I can't make this ship

1783
01:22:27,080 --> 01:22:30,360
Speaker 5: up like it's just what I've done to help my

1784
01:22:30,520 --> 01:22:33,280
Speaker 5: mental health. It's literally what it's helping me live another day.

1785
01:22:34,120 --> 01:22:37,880
Speaker 5: And so yeah, when I say story every fucking time

1786
01:22:37,960 --> 01:22:43,160
Speaker 5: you ask me, okay, but yeah, it's it's it's nuts,

1787
01:22:43,240 --> 01:22:47,040
Speaker 5: and there's no roadmap to answer your question, really no

1788
01:22:47,160 --> 01:22:49,560
Speaker 5: roadmap to this. And there's most times where I'm just like,

1789
01:22:49,880 --> 01:22:52,800
Speaker 5: the fuck am I even doing? You know, like what

1790
01:22:53,000 --> 01:22:55,200
Speaker 5: is this an entrepreneur? Or every day that you wake

1791
01:22:55,280 --> 01:22:56,680
Speaker 5: up and you're like, how am I going to get

1792
01:22:56,720 --> 01:22:57,519
Speaker 5: through this day?

1793
01:22:57,640 --> 01:22:57,800
Speaker 4: You know?

1794
01:22:58,040 --> 01:23:00,360
Speaker 5: And that's it's really just you get through day by

1795
01:23:00,439 --> 01:23:02,840
Speaker 5: day because anything can happen to you any day.

1796
01:23:03,040 --> 01:23:06,600
Speaker 3: So one day at a time, people's one day at

1797
01:23:06,640 --> 01:23:09,879
Speaker 3: a time. Working on your confidence, yeah.

1798
01:23:10,560 --> 01:23:13,280
Speaker 5: And knowing that who you are is the right person

1799
01:23:14,120 --> 01:23:17,559
Speaker 5: and being yourself is the most freeing thing in the world.

1800
01:23:17,800 --> 01:23:22,200
Speaker 5: Like you just stop having that feeling of anxiety, honestly, right,

1801
01:23:22,520 --> 01:23:24,200
Speaker 5: because even if a cover up who you are anymore,

1802
01:23:24,240 --> 01:23:25,800
Speaker 5: it doesn't matter if someone likes you or not, and

1803
01:23:25,880 --> 01:23:30,960
Speaker 5: you're gonna be okay, You're gonna be fine. Yeah, I

1804
01:23:31,120 --> 01:23:33,080
Speaker 5: say I always say this. If you're not paying my bills,

1805
01:23:33,120 --> 01:23:36,080
Speaker 5: I don't care really what you think. I mean, even

1806
01:23:36,160 --> 01:23:38,439
Speaker 5: if you do, I don't care, but like I don't

1807
01:23:39,320 --> 01:23:41,880
Speaker 5: especially that reason, you know, if you're not putting a

1808
01:23:41,920 --> 01:23:45,120
Speaker 5: roof over my head and friends don't pay your bills.

1809
01:23:45,120 --> 01:23:49,120
Speaker 5: I say that too, just keeping it real, Like that's true.

1810
01:23:49,320 --> 01:23:51,600
Speaker 3: At the end of the day, we when we go,

1811
01:23:52,080 --> 01:23:52,799
Speaker 3: we go alone.

1812
01:23:52,880 --> 01:23:57,120
Speaker 6: We come with them absolutely, And that's even because even

1813
01:23:57,360 --> 01:23:59,920
Speaker 6: like what you said, like I can't it's not for her,

1814
01:24:00,240 --> 01:24:02,000
Speaker 6: for my mom, for my dad, and for my daughter,

1815
01:24:02,360 --> 01:24:05,960
Speaker 6: for myself, Like we of course we do this network,

1816
01:24:06,040 --> 01:24:08,479
Speaker 6: but we come and alone, we leave alone, and we

1817
01:24:08,600 --> 01:24:11,840
Speaker 6: have to make children that are okay with ultimately who

1818
01:24:11,920 --> 01:24:13,320
Speaker 6: they are and.

1819
01:24:13,479 --> 01:24:17,479
Speaker 5: Just share what's helping you if you can growing up now,

1820
01:24:18,240 --> 01:24:21,559
Speaker 5: it's I guess these social influencers that are doing big

1821
01:24:21,640 --> 01:24:23,519
Speaker 5: things in the world, all are really doing is sharing

1822
01:24:23,560 --> 01:24:26,760
Speaker 5: common sense. They're they're sharing life and how to get

1823
01:24:26,840 --> 01:24:30,360
Speaker 5: through life. And that's all it's about. Because this new generation,

1824
01:24:30,560 --> 01:24:33,439
Speaker 5: they don't know common sense. They don't even know how

1825
01:24:33,520 --> 01:24:35,560
Speaker 5: to do the simplest things in life, and that's what

1826
01:24:35,760 --> 01:24:40,080
Speaker 5: gives them fear and anxiety. And like there's kids in

1827
01:24:40,240 --> 01:24:42,480
Speaker 5: high school and in middle school that are committing suicide

1828
01:24:42,880 --> 01:24:45,800
Speaker 5: right now and that's not okay. And so the more

1829
01:24:45,880 --> 01:24:48,920
Speaker 5: you talk about it, the more you give them things

1830
01:24:49,000 --> 01:24:51,040
Speaker 5: and tools that will help them, like simple things like

1831
01:24:51,280 --> 01:24:52,200
Speaker 5: changing attire.

1832
01:24:52,360 --> 01:24:55,720
Speaker 3: You know, Like I always feel like they know too

1833
01:24:55,840 --> 01:25:00,880
Speaker 3: much and it's too much, too overwhelming, over at once, over.

1834
01:25:00,840 --> 01:25:06,760
Speaker 4: Too much to download and understand, and it's like high,

1835
01:25:07,120 --> 01:25:12,520
Speaker 4: too much sensory, elite keep as much as your accessibility,

1836
01:25:12,800 --> 01:25:17,000
Speaker 4: the many many options that you know everything, you have

1837
01:25:17,120 --> 01:25:18,200
Speaker 4: a choice of everything.

1838
01:25:18,479 --> 01:25:20,080
Speaker 3: There's always a choice, there's all you know.

1839
01:25:20,200 --> 01:25:23,880
Speaker 4: It's like it makes everyone doubt and question themselves because there's,

1840
01:25:24,080 --> 01:25:25,439
Speaker 4: you know, so many options.

1841
01:25:26,760 --> 01:25:28,080
Speaker 3: It's a blessing and a churus.

1842
01:25:28,080 --> 01:25:31,880
Speaker 5: I would say, I agree, you know, and Instagram people

1843
01:25:32,000 --> 01:25:34,080
Speaker 5: use it for all the wrong reasons. Instagram should be

1844
01:25:34,120 --> 01:25:36,640
Speaker 5: a bonus in their life. It shouldn't be their main

1845
01:25:36,760 --> 01:25:39,120
Speaker 5: source of income. They should create a business and then

1846
01:25:39,200 --> 01:25:41,880
Speaker 5: get onto Instagram because your business card is really in person.

1847
01:25:41,960 --> 01:25:45,439
Speaker 5: I say this all the time to people, like if

1848
01:25:45,520 --> 01:25:47,759
Speaker 5: you if you lose your Instagram account and you're losing

1849
01:25:47,800 --> 01:25:50,280
Speaker 5: all of your business or something wrong, you already fucked up.

1850
01:25:51,439 --> 01:25:54,200
Speaker 5: You know what I'm saying, Like, I think after going

1851
01:25:54,240 --> 01:25:56,639
Speaker 5: through so many traumatic incidents, and I say this because

1852
01:25:57,080 --> 01:25:59,360
Speaker 5: it's not Instagram that will pay your bills.

1853
01:25:59,680 --> 01:26:00,960
Speaker 3: People need to realize that.

1854
01:26:02,600 --> 01:26:05,320
Speaker 5: I went onto that after I started a job and

1855
01:26:05,640 --> 01:26:09,400
Speaker 5: after having client tell, after having things to actually share

1856
01:26:09,520 --> 01:26:12,080
Speaker 5: on there, but I had to like practice my skill too,

1857
01:26:12,560 --> 01:26:15,240
Speaker 5: and then it was a great tool to share my

1858
01:26:15,439 --> 01:26:19,519
Speaker 5: work on. But if you if you lose that tool,

1859
01:26:19,800 --> 01:26:22,000
Speaker 5: I will still have my clients that know exactly where

1860
01:26:22,040 --> 01:26:24,000
Speaker 5: to find me because they found me before that app,

1861
01:26:24,120 --> 01:26:25,680
Speaker 5: right right right, they know where to find me.

1862
01:26:25,760 --> 01:26:28,800
Speaker 3: And no matter what life circumstances throws at.

1863
01:26:28,720 --> 01:26:30,439
Speaker 5: You, and even if you can't go to work, even

1864
01:26:30,439 --> 01:26:32,760
Speaker 5: if you can't post anymore because you're mentally not okay,

1865
01:26:33,280 --> 01:26:35,280
Speaker 5: your business and your bread and butter is still okay

1866
01:26:35,640 --> 01:26:37,400
Speaker 5: for sure, you know what I mean, because you have

1867
01:26:37,520 --> 01:26:39,599
Speaker 5: nothing to talk about if you're going through something mentally,

1868
01:26:39,680 --> 01:26:41,760
Speaker 5: but you're gonna still have to have some sort of stability.

1869
01:26:42,960 --> 01:26:46,840
Speaker 5: So I hope all kids do that, Like make your

1870
01:26:46,920 --> 01:26:49,360
Speaker 5: damn bed before you log into that app, did you

1871
01:26:49,600 --> 01:26:54,800
Speaker 5: this morning? Like yeah, no, I really really try consciously

1872
01:26:54,920 --> 01:26:56,280
Speaker 5: not to like open Instagram.

1873
01:26:56,360 --> 01:26:58,519
Speaker 3: That'd be my first thing I open. Or it's not

1874
01:26:58,800 --> 01:26:59,400
Speaker 3: it's toxic.

1875
01:26:59,640 --> 01:26:59,880
Speaker 5: It is.

1876
01:27:00,560 --> 01:27:05,320
Speaker 3: It's a disease. It's an addiction toxic. Yeah, oh my god,

1877
01:27:05,439 --> 01:27:09,160
Speaker 3: look this has been fun. This is really wonderful. We

1878
01:27:09,200 --> 01:27:11,400
Speaker 3: have wonderful Hannah Oh my god, we're gonna take this.

1879
01:27:11,640 --> 01:27:14,080
Speaker 3: Oh my god, it was so beautiful.

1880
01:27:14,240 --> 01:27:14,920
Speaker 4: It was really cool.

1881
01:27:15,320 --> 01:27:17,160
Speaker 3: This is thank you I've ever had in my life.

1882
01:27:17,200 --> 01:27:20,479
Speaker 5: And your nails both did you do that the pink?

1883
01:27:21,320 --> 01:27:24,360
Speaker 3: No, don't look at this nail. This is Erica has

1884
01:27:24,439 --> 01:27:25,240
Speaker 3: like Kin Saniara.

1885
01:27:27,400 --> 01:27:29,360
Speaker 4: I had a photo shoot for Beauty Leather and it

1886
01:27:29,479 --> 01:27:31,519
Speaker 4: was like doing this campaign and so I put a crown.

1887
01:27:31,880 --> 01:27:34,280
Speaker 4: They wanted me to not get some nail art and

1888
01:27:34,439 --> 01:27:37,720
Speaker 4: this is not my steel and I feel very I

1889
01:27:37,760 --> 01:27:39,000
Speaker 4: don't know, just it's just.

1890
01:27:39,160 --> 01:27:44,360
Speaker 3: Very bulky, bulky, and I need to get it removed.

1891
01:27:48,320 --> 01:27:51,759
Speaker 3: Beamed nails. This is wonderful. You need to do like Hannah,

1892
01:27:52,800 --> 01:27:54,000
Speaker 3: they have like they have nail art.

1893
01:27:55,360 --> 01:27:56,280
Speaker 5: Can you do that? Have you done that?

1894
01:27:56,439 --> 01:27:59,320
Speaker 3: I haven't done that yet on your nails. I've done

1895
01:27:59,479 --> 01:28:00,559
Speaker 3: like kinds of others.

1896
01:28:01,600 --> 01:28:06,280
Speaker 5: Yeah yeah, yeah, and like on clothes and like fabric paste,

1897
01:28:06,600 --> 01:28:08,200
Speaker 5: fabric paint you can actually roll it up in this

1898
01:28:08,280 --> 01:28:11,320
Speaker 5: sucker and like do Hannah, I did this, like Onesie

1899
01:28:11,840 --> 01:28:13,360
Speaker 5: and things like that, just fun stuff.

1900
01:28:13,479 --> 01:28:18,960
Speaker 3: Yeah, but from cake, you know, yes, piss everyone off.

1901
01:28:19,960 --> 01:28:24,599
Speaker 3: I'm not kidding. I'm just I know, I know. Wait,

1902
01:28:24,680 --> 01:28:28,040
Speaker 3: so tell our sell our listeners where they can find you. Yeah, Instagram,

1903
01:28:28,479 --> 01:28:32,200
Speaker 3: Natasha is what I want. Yes, and yeah check her out.

1904
01:28:32,360 --> 01:28:35,760
Speaker 3: Check out Natasha and thank you Natasha. Happy for coming

1905
01:28:35,840 --> 01:28:38,160
Speaker 3: on and your lash bar in Sudio City.

1906
01:28:38,479 --> 01:28:41,040
Speaker 5: Oh yeah, sorry, I feel like everything's on that one page.

1907
01:28:41,080 --> 01:28:43,759
Speaker 5: But Hannah by Natasha is my platform and my Shanti.

1908
01:28:44,040 --> 01:28:47,400
Speaker 5: My Shanti bar is my lash and Hannah bar and

1909
01:28:47,439 --> 01:28:50,599
Speaker 5: Shanti means peace in Hindi. And that's why I named

1910
01:28:50,600 --> 01:28:52,200
Speaker 5: it that, because I feel like I met most at

1911
01:28:52,240 --> 01:28:54,920
Speaker 5: people four just making women feel beautiful all day.

1912
01:28:54,960 --> 01:28:58,640
Speaker 3: So those two places maybe you can find me. We

1913
01:28:58,680 --> 01:29:02,120
Speaker 3: would really enjoyed having you. I love you. Yes, thank

1914
01:29:02,200 --> 01:29:06,200
Speaker 3: you so much for driving out here. I'd rather be

1915
01:29:06,280 --> 01:29:09,519
Speaker 3: here than the blizzard That'sandle's having right now. I'm sure

1916
01:29:10,000 --> 01:29:14,519
Speaker 3: I'm good on that too. Late guys, well, we will

1917
01:29:14,760 --> 01:29:17,200
Speaker 3: ring us up on last lights us up one last time.

1918
01:29:18,040 --> 01:29:20,960
Speaker 6: And as usual, you can find us at Good Momsbad

1919
01:29:21,040 --> 01:29:24,400
Speaker 6: Choices dot com if you have any questions and you

1920
01:29:24,479 --> 01:29:27,240
Speaker 6: need any advice about.

1921
01:29:27,000 --> 01:29:28,920
Speaker 3: Anything about a d m us or email us.

1922
01:29:30,000 --> 01:29:35,240
Speaker 6: Also, we are having our one year anniversary live show

1923
01:29:35,360 --> 01:29:37,160
Speaker 6: slash party March sixteenth.

1924
01:29:39,840 --> 01:29:41,280
Speaker 3: I thought it was a seventeen.

1925
01:29:41,560 --> 01:29:47,000
Speaker 4: March March sixteenth, So make sure you check out the

1926
01:29:47,120 --> 01:29:48,639
Speaker 4: link in our bio for all.

1927
01:29:48,600 --> 01:29:51,880
Speaker 6: That information and sign up for a newsletter for exclusive

1928
01:29:52,000 --> 01:29:52,679
Speaker 6: drops drops.

1929
01:29:54,040 --> 01:29:56,120
Speaker 4: Yeah, actually you should sign up for our Newsletter's a

1930
01:29:56,160 --> 01:29:58,920
Speaker 4: lot of really cool shitt in there you.

1931
01:29:58,960 --> 01:30:07,080
Speaker 3: Don't hear on the pod personal updates. All right, you

1932
01:30:07,160 --> 01:30:10,400
Speaker 3: gotta go, bye bye bye.

1933
01:30:11,400 --> 01:30:15,200
Speaker 2: One line online and no send me, no flex beak

1934
01:30:15,320 --> 01:30:18,400
Speaker 2: gimee Donald's show, speed Time.

1935
01:30:18,880 --> 01:30:21,520
Speaker 3: I just want to wake up a sea fizza.

1936
01:30:21,920 --> 01:30:24,080
Speaker 1: Upatively be high?

1937
01:30:25,040 --> 01:30:26,720
Speaker 5: Is the Presidential sleep leave?

1938
01:30:26,760 --> 01:30:29,160
Speaker 3: What day Lanti and the Rols does spend it?

1939
01:30:29,520 --> 01:30:34,400
Speaker 2: Wendell sent it Sundown one chine, break it down? One

1940
01:30:34,600 --> 01:30:38,040
Speaker 2: line on line and no send me no flex beak

1941
01:30:38,160 --> 01:30:39,920
Speaker 2: guine Donald's Shop.

1942
01:30:42,640 --> 01:30:45,160
Speaker 4: If you, or anyone you know or love are having

1943
01:30:45,240 --> 01:30:49,639
Speaker 4: suicidal thoughts, please reach out to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline.

1944
01:30:50,080 --> 01:30:54,679
Speaker 4: Their numbers eight hundred two seven three eight two five five.

1945
01:30:55,280 --> 01:30:57,960
Speaker 4: You can also ask your primary physician if you have

1946
01:30:58,120 --> 01:31:02,000
Speaker 4: any therapist, or can seek help within your network. Sometimes

1947
01:31:02,040 --> 01:31:04,000
Speaker 4: talking to a stranger is best.

1948
01:31:04,640 --> 01:31:06,120
Speaker 3: Please know you are not alone.