WEBVTT - #224 - Bozo 0:00:02.279 --> 0:00:08.520 Good m check check. We roun boutleg Cavs show were 0:00:08.520 --> 0:00:12.080 in the building, special guests in here. We got the 0:00:12.080 --> 0:00:15.640 homie Bozo. I appreciate it. They welcome, welcome. You just 0:00:15.680 --> 0:00:19.480 dropped a new project too, Yes, sure Thursday. Well, by 0:00:19.480 --> 0:00:21.439 the time this comes out, the project will be out. 0:00:21.880 --> 0:00:24.680 No last year, oh last Thursday, so it's already out. Okay, 0:00:24.680 --> 0:00:26.320 I'm like, wait, twenty ninth. We're in the middle of October, 0:00:26.320 --> 0:00:28.920 the beginning of October. Well, shit, welcome man. I know 0:00:28.960 --> 0:00:30.440 we were trying to make it happen for a while. Yeah, 0:00:30.480 --> 0:00:33.280 I appreciate it, yes, sir. For people, I'm like that 0:00:33.360 --> 0:00:35.680 Joe was winning. So no, it's all good man. Nah, 0:00:35.800 --> 0:00:39.400 it's how for people who don't know who you are, 0:00:39.600 --> 0:00:41.839 where you're from, how long you've been making music, give 0:00:41.880 --> 0:00:44.960 me kind of just like a background front. So I 0:00:45.000 --> 0:00:47.479 go by the artist thing. Well my hood name too, Bozo. 0:00:47.520 --> 0:00:49.239 I kept my handle, you know, Yeah, it means too 0:00:49.320 --> 0:00:51.400 much to me. I'm from the city of People, Rivera, Southeast, 0:00:51.440 --> 0:00:55.319 Los Angeles, born and raised bread in my hood. I've 0:00:55.320 --> 0:00:57.600 been wrapping. I got signed the university in two thousand 0:00:57.600 --> 0:01:01.360 and four. I was four months into my idea I 0:01:01.440 --> 0:01:04.320 caught a turned for string of arm robberies and then 0:01:04.360 --> 0:01:07.280 saw with the any weapon. I went to prison for 0:01:07.520 --> 0:01:10.520 ten years two months. I parode in the summer of 0:01:10.560 --> 0:01:13.680 twenty fifteen, and I hit the ground running and I've 0:01:13.720 --> 0:01:17.320 been doing my shit ever since independently. Wow was it 0:01:17.360 --> 0:01:21.600 hard to I feel like if you do ten years 0:01:21.600 --> 0:01:24.600 in prison kind of like the music industry passes you by, 0:01:24.680 --> 0:01:27.560 technology passes you by. Before you went in, you were 0:01:27.560 --> 0:01:29.960 able to still sell CDs and shit, and you know, 0:01:30.000 --> 0:01:32.800 MySpace was still popping. Was it hard for you to 0:01:32.840 --> 0:01:35.560 like get the motivation to pick back up and like 0:01:35.600 --> 0:01:38.880 get back on the grind like when you got out. 0:01:39.160 --> 0:01:41.720 When I went to prison, I stopped writing music, Like 0:01:41.760 --> 0:01:43.520 I wasn't one of them dudes in prison like with 0:01:43.640 --> 0:01:47.400 fucking notebooks. Yeah, because my situation, I didn't know if 0:01:47.400 --> 0:01:50.040 I was gonna make it home. Col happened, you feel me? Yeah? 0:01:50.680 --> 0:01:52.720 I came home early. I was supposed to do way more, 0:01:52.880 --> 0:01:55.040 but it was changed and I was able to come 0:01:55.080 --> 0:02:00.680 home after ten years. But when I came home, the 0:02:00.960 --> 0:02:04.120 access to like well, I'm sure you know like back 0:02:04.160 --> 0:02:06.040 in the days it was different to the distribution, Well, 0:02:06.080 --> 0:02:08.200 it was a lot more difficult to release music, yeah 0:02:08.240 --> 0:02:11.320 to yes, Yeah, to distribute your music legitimately, it was 0:02:11.960 --> 0:02:14.080 shit if you didn't have a plug, like it was hard. 0:02:14.160 --> 0:02:17.640 And then yeah, so that was encouraging, you know, and 0:02:17.680 --> 0:02:22.480 then YouTube didn't exist, didn't exist when I went to prison. 0:02:22.560 --> 0:02:25.720 So YouTube was extremely welcoming to to me because I 0:02:25.720 --> 0:02:28.200 felt like there was a void in my community, specifically 0:02:28.720 --> 0:02:34.240 of growth and transitioning to different sounds and new modern sounds. 0:02:34.280 --> 0:02:36.200 You know, I felt like we were stuck in quick sounds, 0:02:36.200 --> 0:02:39.079 like nobody was really pushing the envelope, nobody was really 0:02:39.760 --> 0:02:41.480 trying to take risks, you know what I mean as 0:02:41.480 --> 0:02:44.160 far as music. So when I came home, I saw 0:02:44.200 --> 0:02:45.800 a void and I just took it as a as 0:02:45.800 --> 0:02:48.519 an advantage. What would you say, like after you got 0:02:48.520 --> 0:02:52.680 out was a moment of success in the music industry 0:02:52.720 --> 0:02:54.600 that kind of like made you realize, oh, you were 0:02:54.680 --> 0:02:56.799 kind of onto something. You had something here that might work. 0:02:56.840 --> 0:02:58.720 You know. Obviously you were signed before you went to prison. 0:02:58.760 --> 0:03:02.280 But the first feature with company, okay, my first feature 0:03:02.280 --> 0:03:04.680 with Comptand was like early when I came out and 0:03:05.280 --> 0:03:08.120 Compton A D had just dropped that you had never 0:03:08.240 --> 0:03:11.560 had a thug, Yeah, so that shit was popping. So 0:03:12.560 --> 0:03:15.160 through a mutual friend of ours, PC and T though 0:03:15.240 --> 0:03:18.200 Man he leaved us up, don't. Man believed the night 0:03:18.200 --> 0:03:21.080 talent from the gate, so he started bringing me and 0:03:21.120 --> 0:03:24.440 he was always like, you know, with what I represent, 0:03:24.919 --> 0:03:27.239 there's always the racial factor, like a are you open 0:03:27.320 --> 0:03:30.320 to work with these people? These people? This me myself, like, 0:03:30.520 --> 0:03:32.080 I'm down to do business with Arabit as long as 0:03:32.080 --> 0:03:34.560 it's a good business, right, we could stand on it, 0:03:34.560 --> 0:03:36.480 you know what I mean at the end of the day. So, yeah, 0:03:36.480 --> 0:03:39.200 when I did something with Compton a D and then 0:03:39.720 --> 0:03:41.640 all my features came back to mac literally like it 0:03:41.720 --> 0:03:43.480 was compin a D. Then at the Joe's Moses, then 0:03:43.520 --> 0:03:46.440 at the G prequel. Then I did r J and 0:03:46.800 --> 0:03:50.680 shit fifteen sixteen, twenty seventeen. Those are the guys. And 0:03:50.760 --> 0:03:52.320 then and by the way, still are the guys. Shout 0:03:52.320 --> 0:03:54.920 out to those Joe Moses just dropped his album. RJ's 0:03:54.920 --> 0:03:57.520 Album's coming soon. Peric was about to go on to work. Yeah, 0:03:57.560 --> 0:03:59.840 so you could imagine I'm sitting in the yard and 0:04:01.040 --> 0:04:04.320 all their albums are coming my way, but they weren't around, 0:04:04.640 --> 0:04:06.480 you know, right, right, right right, So to come home 0:04:06.680 --> 0:04:09.040 and be able to have the luxury to work with 0:04:09.080 --> 0:04:11.280 them was dope. You know what I'm saying, it was 0:04:11.320 --> 0:04:14.160 it was very encouraging. Yeah, I was onto something. Are 0:04:14.200 --> 0:04:18.120 you as like an independent artist, what are some of 0:04:18.160 --> 0:04:21.240 the things that you've like learned over the last like 0:04:21.279 --> 0:04:24.760 four or five years, Because I feel like when you're independent, 0:04:24.839 --> 0:04:27.160 sometimes you don't have the like you don't have the 0:04:27.240 --> 0:04:30.159 luxury of having a building behind you that kind of 0:04:30.160 --> 0:04:32.240 already knows what not to do and what to do. 0:04:32.920 --> 0:04:35.479 You got to kind of like just keep it moving 0:04:35.960 --> 0:04:37.800 when you when you, yeah, you go through growing page. 0:04:37.800 --> 0:04:39.320 You got to learn from your mistakes. What are some 0:04:39.320 --> 0:04:41.440 of the biggest things you've you've you've learned so far? 0:04:41.600 --> 0:04:43.720 The biggest thing that well, what I did this time 0:04:43.760 --> 0:04:47.120 that I came home. I try to rationalize my situation, 0:04:47.720 --> 0:04:49.760 so I tell myself, all right, there's no label behind 0:04:49.760 --> 0:04:52.599 you no more. We're definitely trying to go back to 0:04:52.600 --> 0:04:55.159 the pen for another ten So what are we gonna do? 0:04:55.200 --> 0:04:56.920 You know what I'm saying. All Right, I put myself 0:04:56.960 --> 0:04:59.920 in college for a year, and I got myself in 0:05:00.080 --> 0:05:02.440 to a good field where I can generate enough money 0:05:02.800 --> 0:05:04.760 to become my own label. And you feel I'm saying, 0:05:04.760 --> 0:05:08.000 what was that electrical? I do electrical? Oh shit, yeah, 0:05:08.000 --> 0:05:10.960 hell yeah, So you're electrician, yes, sir, hell yeah, Wow, 0:05:11.680 --> 0:05:15.400 that's fire yeah so so yeah. So I put myself 0:05:15.400 --> 0:05:18.600 to calls, like I said, because in my experience before, 0:05:20.000 --> 0:05:23.000 I felt like other people were dictating the path of 0:05:23.040 --> 0:05:25.080 my music and how it was going, in the direction 0:05:25.120 --> 0:05:27.200 it was going in, or when I could do this 0:05:27.320 --> 0:05:32.560 or in that studio time for that matter. So I 0:05:32.560 --> 0:05:35.360 didn't feel like I didn't feel like begging dog like like. 0:05:35.520 --> 0:05:37.120 And I don't mean begging like in the wrong way. 0:05:37.160 --> 0:05:38.800 What I mean. It's like I didn't want to put 0:05:38.800 --> 0:05:41.760 myself in a bonum position and people be looking at 0:05:41.760 --> 0:05:45.240 me like, oh, I'm a desperate looking for help. So 0:05:45.560 --> 0:05:47.640 I did my shit independently. I funded my own shit 0:05:48.120 --> 0:05:50.400 legitimately with money I was doing through my nine to 0:05:50.480 --> 0:05:53.159 fives and long shifts I was pulling. But at the 0:05:53.200 --> 0:05:57.520 same time, I have such a strong standing reputation in 0:05:57.560 --> 0:06:00.760 streets that it wasn't hard for me to like get 0:06:00.800 --> 0:06:04.880 direct lines to so and so sood. I've dealt with 0:06:04.880 --> 0:06:07.080 people from AWE, from cribs to blood to everything on 0:06:07.080 --> 0:06:10.200 the streets before, so it wasn't hard for me to 0:06:10.240 --> 0:06:13.000 connect those dots. So I just worked with what I had. 0:06:13.040 --> 0:06:14.960 You know what I'm saying. I took advantage of the 0:06:15.560 --> 0:06:17.839 pros that I did have and the cons I just 0:06:17.880 --> 0:06:20.400 try to evolve them into some that could become an advantage. Also, 0:06:20.520 --> 0:06:25.280 you feel say, I feel like most people would not uh. 0:06:25.400 --> 0:06:29.000 I feel like having a practical trade to have to 0:06:29.160 --> 0:06:33.960 fund your dream is like something that most people wouldn't glorify. Well, 0:06:34.279 --> 0:06:36.560 I did it the other way before. And then and 0:06:36.960 --> 0:06:40.040 you're landed in prison robberies and I did over a decade, 0:06:40.160 --> 0:06:43.520 you saw what the Yeah you saw with the downside. Yeah, yeah, 0:06:43.680 --> 0:06:46.320 reality was like, yeah, you could be a risk taker, 0:06:46.360 --> 0:06:51.359 but the risk that we're taking ship are long lasting consequence, 0:06:51.839 --> 0:06:54.000 And so I didn't you know, And then you come 0:06:54.000 --> 0:06:56.680 home to your family. You got things like after a decade, 0:06:57.279 --> 0:06:59.000 my dad died, you know, my brother in law died, 0:06:59.000 --> 0:07:01.520 and my grandma died, my cousin died, Like ship, the 0:07:01.560 --> 0:07:05.159 house was empty, you feel me. So I came home 0:07:05.200 --> 0:07:07.880 to a family in shambles, like women that didn't have 0:07:07.920 --> 0:07:10.480 no male in the house. There was no uncle that 0:07:10.600 --> 0:07:12.800 loved the nieces, there was no dad that loved their kids. 0:07:12.800 --> 0:07:15.120 There was no older brother to look over my sister, 0:07:15.200 --> 0:07:17.280 you feel, I'm saying, so with that, I put my 0:07:17.320 --> 0:07:19.120 ego on, my pride to the side, you feel. I'm saying, 0:07:19.120 --> 0:07:20.640 like I felt like I had a bigger purpose. You 0:07:20.640 --> 0:07:23.440 know that's big man. Yeah, I think like too, just 0:07:23.480 --> 0:07:27.280 for anybody watching, like it's okay to figure out, Well, 0:07:27.280 --> 0:07:29.600 I think it's I think it's I think it's I 0:07:29.640 --> 0:07:32.200 think that it's not okay not to do it legitimately 0:07:33.320 --> 0:07:35.400 because as a business, let's say you're doing real estate 0:07:35.440 --> 0:07:38.080 bro right, and you're buying houses to flip and ship, 0:07:38.160 --> 0:07:41.240 of course, but you're doing that off of illegitimate money. 0:07:41.880 --> 0:07:44.760 One day they're gonna trade the paper trailers to come 0:07:44.800 --> 0:07:47.200 back to you, or they're gonna catch you, you feel, saying, 0:07:47.200 --> 0:07:48.880 You're just gonna get caught of the red light without 0:07:48.880 --> 0:07:50.800 the right blinker on and it's a wrap, you feel. 0:07:50.800 --> 0:07:53.800 I'm saying, so the margin of error is fucking yeah, 0:07:53.840 --> 0:07:57.440 and like you you move around stress the fuck stress? Yeah, well, 0:07:57.440 --> 0:07:58.960 I did you know what I mean? Like the home, 0:07:59.040 --> 0:08:00.960 I'll tell you, like they came for me, they rated 0:08:00.960 --> 0:08:04.560 all my pads. I had to fucking flee to Colorado 0:08:04.600 --> 0:08:06.559 with an advance from the label. I ended up burning 0:08:06.560 --> 0:08:08.240 the label for their advance on that. They never got 0:08:08.240 --> 0:08:13.520 to recoop off my ship universal and cost so so yeah, 0:08:13.560 --> 0:08:16.440 so as a business model, it's it's not a good 0:08:16.480 --> 0:08:18.000 model too, you know what I mean to go And 0:08:18.040 --> 0:08:19.200 I know a lot of people do it, and I 0:08:19.240 --> 0:08:24.920 know it's glorified in this business, but I don't know, Bro, 0:08:24.960 --> 0:08:26.920 I just can't do it again, you feel saying I'm 0:08:26.920 --> 0:08:29.520 not ready for that trip? You know. Yeah, that's too good. 0:08:29.600 --> 0:08:33.040 More people should preach what you're preacher. Man, A lot 0:08:33.040 --> 0:08:34.480 of people haven't been through what I've been through. That's 0:08:34.520 --> 0:08:36.600 why they don't. That's real. If they knew better, they 0:08:36.600 --> 0:08:38.720 would they would say better, you feel saying, but they don't. 0:08:38.800 --> 0:08:42.559 Would you say that? Because what originally? How much time 0:08:42.559 --> 0:08:44.199 are you facing? You said you got? I'm thirty five 0:08:44.200 --> 0:08:46.000 of life? Thirty five life because I'm a two I'm 0:08:46.040 --> 0:08:48.960 a three striker and I've been busted for other robberies 0:08:49.000 --> 0:08:51.560 as a kid, I grew up without a household, you know, 0:08:51.679 --> 0:08:59.400 so I've had to survive. I think, what it doesn't matter, 0:08:59.480 --> 0:09:01.480 that red thing don't matter, no matter, it just it 0:09:01.559 --> 0:09:05.720 just mutes out of the headphones. Yeah, I just wanted 0:09:05.760 --> 0:09:09.000 to make sure. Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's fine. 0:09:09.040 --> 0:09:12.240 So that red button only mutes the headphones. Does that 0:09:12.280 --> 0:09:15.240 make sense? Yeah, because you heard it in the headphones. Yeah, 0:09:15.280 --> 0:09:17.080 you're good, You're good. All right, I'm sorry. So you 0:09:17.080 --> 0:09:19.560 were supposed to do thirty five because for people who 0:09:19.600 --> 0:09:22.040 don't know, in Cali they had the three strikes. Yeah, yeah, 0:09:22.040 --> 0:09:25.200 three strike laws. Still is that? Still? It is? When like, 0:09:25.280 --> 0:09:28.520 let's say that you understand the law is like a 0:09:28.600 --> 0:09:31.120 chaining fence. You know, it has many different loops, directions 0:09:31.120 --> 0:09:34.559 and connections and how it's bonded together. But when you're 0:09:34.559 --> 0:09:38.199 a DA and you really want to prosecute somebody, every 0:09:38.240 --> 0:09:42.240 single case log that has existed for mankind is open 0:09:42.320 --> 0:09:44.040 to you. You just got to learn how to use 0:09:44.040 --> 0:09:45.880 it in a loophole, you know what I'm saying. So 0:09:45.960 --> 0:09:50.680 let's say, for instance, you're you've done. You've been busted 0:09:50.720 --> 0:09:54.000 for two arm robberies and one sexual assault, right right. 0:09:55.559 --> 0:09:58.680 The law might say, oh, it's not all three armed robberies, 0:09:58.720 --> 0:10:00.800 so we can't strike them out, you know what I'm saying. 0:10:00.840 --> 0:10:03.480 But the DA, if they catch you for three sexual assaults, 0:10:03.760 --> 0:10:05.320 they'll find a way to be like, okay, it's the 0:10:05.320 --> 0:10:09.920 exact same crime every time. He's a criminal, let's strike 0:10:10.000 --> 0:10:12.080 him out on those streets. So it just depends, now 0:10:12.120 --> 0:10:14.439 how bad the prosecution wants you and what kind of 0:10:14.480 --> 0:10:16.720 case they want. So at what point in time did 0:10:16.760 --> 0:10:18.640 you find out? Because once you get put in thirty 0:10:18.679 --> 0:10:20.760 five to life, you're pretty much like, this is my life. 0:10:21.600 --> 0:10:23.719 So I got I went to trial. I've always went. 0:10:23.720 --> 0:10:25.240 I've always got a trial because I don't have nothing 0:10:25.240 --> 0:10:27.840 to lose. You know, when when you have something to lose, 0:10:27.960 --> 0:10:30.640 like you tend to take a deal. But with me, 0:10:30.679 --> 0:10:32.839 they never offered me a date. It was always life 0:10:32.880 --> 0:10:35.719 life or twenty five plus onto me. Might as well 0:10:35.760 --> 0:10:37.960 be life, you know what I'm saying. So so I 0:10:38.000 --> 0:10:40.920 went to trial and I lost in trial and Pomona 0:10:41.000 --> 0:10:45.240 Court Superior Court Judge Ta Fisher found me guilty of 0:10:45.600 --> 0:10:48.080 all my charges except from assault with the deadly weapon, 0:10:48.120 --> 0:10:50.960 the shooting I beat, but five arm robberies that I 0:10:51.000 --> 0:10:55.160 convicted of. So when she went, you know, they so 0:10:55.200 --> 0:10:57.200 you get let's say today is your day to find 0:10:57.200 --> 0:10:59.720 out your verdict. You get found guilty, right, boom, knock 0:10:59.760 --> 0:11:01.800 you out, go back to court, come back in two 0:11:01.800 --> 0:11:05.000 months for sentencing. At that point. Within those two months, 0:11:05.360 --> 0:11:07.960 the law, well, the judge, the DA either has the 0:11:08.000 --> 0:11:10.880 opportunity to go through your file and try and give 0:11:10.920 --> 0:11:13.720 you some leanency or they just don't give a fuck 0:11:14.120 --> 0:11:16.480 and give you the max time, you know what I'm saying. 0:11:17.160 --> 0:11:18.840 So a lot of times it depends on your crime, 0:11:18.960 --> 0:11:21.640 the seriousness of it, the violence behind it, and really 0:11:21.640 --> 0:11:23.480 how it went down to get some kind of sympathy, 0:11:23.480 --> 0:11:26.640 you know what I'm saying. So fortunate for me, the 0:11:26.720 --> 0:11:29.640 lawyer that I was going with at the time really 0:11:29.640 --> 0:11:32.160 pushed for the judge to open up my file. So 0:11:32.280 --> 0:11:37.080 two months after her verdict she gave me. She gave 0:11:37.120 --> 0:11:40.360 me eighteen years with the probably the parole, you know 0:11:40.360 --> 0:11:43.480 what I'm saying. So my case, I was supposed to 0:11:43.480 --> 0:11:46.920 get thirty five to life, but the judge basically told me, look, 0:11:47.080 --> 0:11:49.360 laws are changing, I'm gonna end up bringing you back 0:11:49.400 --> 0:11:52.080 ten years anyways. In Land, you go, she wasn't lying 0:11:52.240 --> 0:11:54.120 to be honest with you, like I went up with 0:11:54.160 --> 0:11:55.920 the eighteen years, from the eighteen years to turn to 0:11:55.960 --> 0:11:58.280 thirteen years, from thirteen to turn to ten because of 0:11:58.400 --> 0:12:01.760 Prop forty seven was changing so many laws. Jerry Brown 0:12:01.760 --> 0:12:04.800 the original person that wrote the three strike law came 0:12:04.880 --> 0:12:08.000 back because I don't know if you know, but California 0:12:08.040 --> 0:12:12.760 prisons were so overflooded that Arnold Schwarzenegger signed the State 0:12:12.760 --> 0:12:16.320 of Emergency, which meant that we're so populated, we could 0:12:16.320 --> 0:12:19.320 start renting prisons and other states and taking them. So 0:12:19.440 --> 0:12:21.920 they rented I think three prison in Arizona, one in 0:12:21.960 --> 0:12:24.719 Oklahoma too, in Mississippi as that prison, that prison for 0:12:25.120 --> 0:12:27.920 profit bullshit, Yes, sir, all federal judges owned that ship. 0:12:27.960 --> 0:12:30.840 So you know, if all federal judges owned the prisons 0:12:31.280 --> 0:12:36.120 and owned the on the canteens and everything that fucking 0:12:36.120 --> 0:12:38.120 generates money in it, how are they not going to 0:12:38.200 --> 0:12:40.800 create to keep you in prison? Yeah, it's a hustle. 0:12:40.880 --> 0:12:43.600 So I ended up from scenting Nel, I ended up 0:12:43.640 --> 0:12:45.719 to Arizona, and then I went all the way to 0:12:45.760 --> 0:12:49.480 Mississippi Tallahatchie, and then I came back. Yeah. Yeah, well 0:12:49.679 --> 0:12:51.400 we're getting caught up in shit. You know. Do you 0:12:51.400 --> 0:12:53.320 think that that was kind of like because of the 0:12:53.320 --> 0:12:56.080 three strike thing? Hell yeah, yeah, because they were giving 0:12:56.120 --> 0:13:00.480 people to well, because that was like California. Yeah, yeah, 0:13:00.480 --> 0:13:03.600 Only it's an enhancement, you know, it's an enhancement. But 0:13:03.600 --> 0:13:06.480 with the three strike law came a gang of different enhancements. 0:13:06.520 --> 0:13:08.880 You know, it wasn't just strikes like it was. Let's 0:13:08.880 --> 0:13:11.360 say you've been to prison before, they were giving you 0:13:11.400 --> 0:13:15.640 two extra for that, Jesus, Let's say it was gang involved. 0:13:15.640 --> 0:13:18.439 That's automatic tens to fifteen extra years. So there was 0:13:18.480 --> 0:13:21.120 a lot of dudes upstate that their crime only carried 0:13:21.160 --> 0:13:24.000 three years, but they were doing eighteen off of enhancements, 0:13:24.920 --> 0:13:27.160 not actual crimes. You know what I'm saying, That crimes 0:13:27.160 --> 0:13:29.560 that she had done in the past, things that didn't 0:13:29.960 --> 0:13:31.599 weren't even prevalent with what you were a busted for 0:13:31.679 --> 0:13:34.000 right now, you know what I'm saying. So as a 0:13:34.080 --> 0:13:36.320 loss change, my day changed, and they got to a 0:13:36.360 --> 0:13:38.560 point where I had been down so long, like just 0:13:38.600 --> 0:13:40.839 kick them out. So I got, like, I think, a 0:13:40.880 --> 0:13:43.240 ten day notice before I came home. Oh yeah, you 0:13:43.800 --> 0:13:48.400 didn't know, you No, I came home fucked up, like honestly, 0:13:49.720 --> 0:13:53.600 emotionally mentally, I wasn't prepared. You know, I was wired 0:13:53.640 --> 0:13:55.320 a certain way. You got understand, Like I took so 0:13:55.400 --> 0:13:58.120 much loss while I was busted as far as heartbreak 0:13:58.120 --> 0:14:02.320 and heartache, Like yeah, that emotionally I wasn't. I wasn't 0:14:03.000 --> 0:14:05.360 confident bro like I was. You know, my spirit was 0:14:05.400 --> 0:14:07.960 broke to a certain extent, like I know flight or fly. 0:14:08.080 --> 0:14:09.800 I know how to survive. I knew how to be 0:14:09.880 --> 0:14:12.880 hardlessing and take care of business in there, but I 0:14:12.960 --> 0:14:16.959 didn't know how to digest some my care for the world, 0:14:17.120 --> 0:14:18.920 my care for my life, you know what I'm saying. 0:14:19.440 --> 0:14:21.400 I lost some implication my family. I lost a lot 0:14:21.400 --> 0:14:23.520 of shit. I lost a lot. So I went back. 0:14:23.600 --> 0:14:26.320 I came home, and I was out like four months. 0:14:26.360 --> 0:14:28.040 Oh you went back, Yeah, I went back. Bro I 0:14:28.120 --> 0:14:31.040 was out four months and then I broke some food's 0:14:31.080 --> 0:14:33.720 nose at a bar over some stupid shit. So I 0:14:33.760 --> 0:14:36.640 went back again for four months. And that's when, really, 0:14:36.680 --> 0:14:39.560 like the humbling King, you feel what I'm saying, Like, 0:14:39.600 --> 0:14:43.120 that's when a moment of reflection, like like I told myself, like, 0:14:43.200 --> 0:14:45.520 damn you a grown ass man, like you ain't got 0:14:45.520 --> 0:14:48.240 shit to show for it all. You got to CDC numbers, 0:14:48.280 --> 0:14:51.080 you feel me like, but you talk all this gangster 0:14:51.160 --> 0:14:54.360 shit like to me, gangsters ain't broke, you know. Yeah. 0:14:54.400 --> 0:14:56.600 I also feel like people got to start to understand, 0:14:56.680 --> 0:14:58.840 like at a certain point in time, like if someone 0:14:58.880 --> 0:15:01.960 talks shit to you at a bar, yeah, like it's 0:15:02.000 --> 0:15:04.240 probably the more gangster thing to be the bigger guy, 0:15:05.040 --> 0:15:06.560 just like you know what, now I know now I'm 0:15:06.600 --> 0:15:08.960 the type of motherfucker. Like the minute I see ship Hey, 0:15:09.000 --> 0:15:10.920 you want to drink, bro, I got you the fuck 0:15:11.000 --> 0:15:13.600 this man drinking? You know? Yeah? Or bring the strip 0:15:13.680 --> 0:15:15.680 over here, give the boy a laugh, you know what 0:15:15.680 --> 0:15:18.000 I'm saying, Because I'm not afraid of what he's gonna do. 0:15:18.040 --> 0:15:21.200 I'm afraid of what I'm gonna do. Bro, Like, Yeah, well, 0:15:21.200 --> 0:15:22.680 I know I got everything to lose. So when you 0:15:22.680 --> 0:15:25.000 got everything to lose, you're playing for keeps, you feel 0:15:25.000 --> 0:15:27.800 I'm saying, I'd rather, I'd rather just you know what 0:15:27.800 --> 0:15:29.600 I mean, Like try to avoid the ship dog because 0:15:29.600 --> 0:15:31.560 at this point, like there's no profit in it, you know. Yeah. 0:15:31.600 --> 0:15:35.320 I think people got to understand, like you can literally 0:15:35.400 --> 0:15:38.480 change your life just making one mistake. Hell yeah, you 0:15:38.480 --> 0:15:41.160 could be drinking too much. One decision, Doug could cost 0:15:41.200 --> 0:15:44.120 you everything. It cost you every everything, literally, And let's 0:15:44.120 --> 0:15:45.520 say you get it. You might get into a fight 0:15:45.560 --> 0:15:47.440 at a bar and then you hit somebody and then 0:15:47.440 --> 0:15:49.000 they fall and they hit their head on the ground 0:15:49.040 --> 0:15:50.360 and then you're fucking in jail with the rest of 0:15:50.400 --> 0:15:53.080 your life. Exture the scenario, right. You go to prison, 0:15:53.920 --> 0:15:55.680 and this happened to me, That's why I'm speaking. You 0:15:55.680 --> 0:15:58.560 go to prison and you know your baby mom's at 0:15:58.560 --> 0:16:01.680 home with the kid. Yeah, and you're fighting this shit together, 0:16:01.720 --> 0:16:03.600 and you're thinking there's a bond, right because you know, 0:16:03.680 --> 0:16:06.360 we tend to have that illusion we're busted, like people 0:16:06.360 --> 0:16:08.640 gonna write it out with us, or people gonna be 0:16:08.680 --> 0:16:12.520 there for us. One time I called on and literally 0:16:12.560 --> 0:16:15.360 the girl that I was being with took the phone 0:16:15.680 --> 0:16:17.720 off the hook, accepting my call and put it on 0:16:17.800 --> 0:16:21.000 speaker so that I could hear her getting my little 0:16:21.040 --> 0:16:24.000 girl ready to go out for dinner with another man, 0:16:25.880 --> 0:16:28.120 and then think about it, like I'm gonna be honest 0:16:28.160 --> 0:16:29.880 with you. I stood there and I heard the whole shit. 0:16:30.560 --> 0:16:33.520 I couldn't hang up, Like, no matter how much ego 0:16:33.560 --> 0:16:36.240 and how much pride and how much gangsterism is in me, 0:16:36.280 --> 0:16:38.800 I couldn't. I couldn't. I couldn't hang out, bro. You 0:16:38.840 --> 0:16:40.800 know what I'm saying. But those are the vulnerable positions 0:16:40.840 --> 0:16:43.320 you put yourself when you're taking those losses you feel 0:16:43.320 --> 0:16:46.240 I'm saying and also like to be honest, Like, it's 0:16:46.240 --> 0:16:49.280 also probably not fair to expect someone to any exactly 0:16:49.280 --> 0:16:50.840 wait for you. But that's the way that because you 0:16:51.120 --> 0:16:53.480 want you Hell, if you really love that girl, let 0:16:53.520 --> 0:16:55.560 her go. Hell, you should allow her to go. And 0:16:55.920 --> 0:16:58.600 because you were facing even even if it was eighteen 0:16:58.680 --> 0:17:02.360 years yeah, like come on, you want to make it. Yeah, 0:17:02.400 --> 0:17:04.720 but it's But that's what I'm saying, though, it's an 0:17:04.840 --> 0:17:08.080 unrealistic reality that we expect, you know what I'm saying, 0:17:08.119 --> 0:17:12.359 Like our expectations are way too pure for the filth 0:17:12.359 --> 0:17:14.159 that we live in. You feel I'm saying, like, we 0:17:14.240 --> 0:17:18.080 expect motherfuckers to have honor and not snitch. We expect 0:17:18.119 --> 0:17:20.200 motherfuckers to have honor and not run from a fight. 0:17:20.640 --> 0:17:23.040 We expect women to stay loyal even though we were 0:17:23.080 --> 0:17:24.720 probably cheating on them because I was cheating like a 0:17:24.720 --> 0:17:27.760 motherfucker when I was I was cheating, I wasn't coming home. 0:17:28.400 --> 0:17:32.560 But your arrogance makes yourself and you start to believe 0:17:32.560 --> 0:17:34.600 that you're entitled to a lot of shit that you're not, 0:17:35.200 --> 0:17:36.720 you know what I'm saying, So when you go away. 0:17:37.160 --> 0:17:40.679 That's why I frowned so much on people snitching and 0:17:40.720 --> 0:17:45.160 debriefing because you think you're doing something dog at the time, right, 0:17:45.200 --> 0:17:48.040 you might think like, oh, you you got the best 0:17:48.040 --> 0:17:51.160 of the system. Fuck everybody, I'm getting out. They weren't 0:17:51.200 --> 0:17:53.680 gonna ride for me anyways. Nah, Bro, Like what you're 0:17:53.720 --> 0:17:55.720 missing is the lesson that you were gonna get during 0:17:55.720 --> 0:17:58.000 that time you were busted. You know what I'm saying, Like, 0:17:58.240 --> 0:18:01.960 you're shortening yourself from life exppeeriances and virtues that only 0:18:02.240 --> 0:18:05.280 on your own you can learn, because solitude is the 0:18:05.320 --> 0:18:07.360 best teacher, bro to to find out who you are, 0:18:07.720 --> 0:18:10.080 to find out what you're prepared for, and to find 0:18:10.119 --> 0:18:12.840 out like exactly how far you'll take something Like I 0:18:12.920 --> 0:18:15.840 knew in prison I couldn't do life. I admit that 0:18:15.840 --> 0:18:18.280 shit Like I can't do life. Dog, I love bitches, 0:18:18.320 --> 0:18:20.600 I love my freedom. You know what I'm saying. I 0:18:20.680 --> 0:18:23.680 like what comes with providing. I like living with a purpose, 0:18:23.680 --> 0:18:25.399 you know what I'm saying. And that was the biggest 0:18:25.400 --> 0:18:28.560 thing for me in prison was like waking up, You're 0:18:28.600 --> 0:18:31.399 just staring at the wall, Doug, no opportunity, no, no nothing, 0:18:31.440 --> 0:18:34.440 You're just an empty shell of existence, you feel, I'm saying, 0:18:34.480 --> 0:18:38.159 Like there's nothing, bro, nothing even writing letters fell stupid 0:18:38.200 --> 0:18:40.560 after my eighth year, you know, like, why the fuck 0:18:40.560 --> 0:18:42.960 am I writing these people? Then you're right back, don't 0:18:42.960 --> 0:18:44.960 give a fuck you over here pouring your soul out 0:18:44.960 --> 0:18:47.800 on the fucking letter and motherfuckers don't even open it 0:18:47.840 --> 0:18:50.080 when it gets home. And I'm in the same place now, Like, 0:18:50.359 --> 0:18:52.880 trust me, all my homies write me and this and that. 0:18:53.160 --> 0:18:54.680 Most of time I don't have time to write back 0:18:54.760 --> 0:18:57.159 or even read them. Bro. Wow, Like I gotta be 0:18:57.240 --> 0:18:59.199 on a trip where it's two hours where I'm like, 0:18:59.200 --> 0:19:00.880