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Speaker 1: It is time now for today's Strawberry Letter. And if

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Speaker 1: you need advice on relationships, dating, work, sex, parenting, and more,

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Speaker 1: please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HARVEYFM dot com

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Speaker 1: and click submit Strawberry Letter. We could be reading your

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Speaker 1: letters live on the air, just like we're going to

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Speaker 1: read this one, this one right here, right now, and

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Speaker 1: you never know, it could be yours.

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Speaker 2: It could be yours. Buckle up and hold on tight.

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Speaker 2: We got it for you here it is strawberry.

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Speaker 1: Let us all right, nephew, thank you. Subject he said

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Speaker 1: his mom is off limits. He said his mom is

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Speaker 1: off limits. Okay, Dear Stephen Shirley. My fiance and his

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Speaker 1: mom were too close, and he struggled to set boundaries

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Speaker 1: with her because the guy she was seeing for twenty

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Speaker 1: years dumped her when he and I met. He had

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Speaker 1: no real friends, and he did everything with his mom,

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Speaker 1: like going to get massages, going on vacations, going on

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Speaker 1: shopping sprees, and going to the nail salon, and everything

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Speaker 1: was always paid for by his mom. Yes, her boyfriend

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Speaker 1: was married, so she had plenty of time to spend

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Speaker 1: with her son. Recognizing the red flags, I urged him

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Speaker 1: to grow up and break free from his mom if

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Speaker 1: he planned to have a future with me. His mom

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Speaker 1: was upset at first and said that I was plotting

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Speaker 1: to take her son away from her. Now that we're engaged,

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Speaker 1: they still spend a lot of time together, but now

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Speaker 1: he invites me to join them. I lost my mom

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Speaker 1: five years ago, so his mom has been helpful with

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Speaker 1: wedding ideas, but I can tell she's not truly happy

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Speaker 1: with me. So at lunch recently, I asked if she

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Speaker 1: had a problem with me. She said, yes, she does.

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Speaker 1: I let her speak, and then I told her all

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Speaker 1: of the issues I have with her. My fiance sat

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Speaker 1: there and let his mom take shots at me, but

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Speaker 1: told me to watch my mouth when I told her

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Speaker 1: about herself. I left the restaurant thinking that things would

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Speaker 1: be better since we cut through the BS, but over

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Speaker 1: the last few days it's gotten worse. My fiance told

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Speaker 1: me that his mom is off limits to me from

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Speaker 1: now on. He told me that I talked to his

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Speaker 1: mom like I'm her equal and she is done with

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Speaker 1: me forever. He said his mom's feeling way heavily on

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Speaker 1: feelings way heavily on him and could affect me and

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Speaker 1: him getting married. How can this be? Is he going

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Speaker 1: to always choose her over me?

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Speaker 2: What do I do?

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Speaker 1: Well? You got to let this go. This is not

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Speaker 1: going to work out, and you're not going to stay

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Speaker 1: married to him long. You wouldn't stay married to him

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Speaker 1: long if you guys were to get married, because his

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Speaker 1: mom would be that third person in your marriage. I

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Speaker 1: know you've invested time in him and feelings in him

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Speaker 1: and all this into this relationship. You've agreed to marry

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Speaker 1: him and everything. But this mama's boy has made his choice,

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Speaker 1: and he chose mama. Okay, he chose his mother. I

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Speaker 1: don't care how right you think you are. You can

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Speaker 1: never disrespect a man's mother. You went too far and

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Speaker 1: telling her about herself, as you call it. You didn't

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Speaker 1: tell us what you said, but you went too far.

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Speaker 1: I know you did. The man just no man is

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Speaker 1: going to just sit there and let you talk crazy

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Speaker 1: to his mom. Nobody's no man is going to do that, period.

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Speaker 1: I mean, it's just not happening. And I am a

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Speaker 1: bit surprised that you didn't already know that though you know,

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Speaker 1: even though you're feeling that, you got to hold back

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Speaker 1: a little bit and just find a way to respectfully

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Speaker 1: say what you said.

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Speaker 2: He was right.

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Speaker 1: You are not her equal, and that's not to say

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Speaker 1: that she can treat you any kind of way. It

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Speaker 1: just means that you have to have a respectful way,

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Speaker 1: like I said, to get her up off you. Key

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Speaker 1: word is respectful. So go ahead, give him his ring

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Speaker 1: back and all that, and start moving on with your

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Speaker 1: life because there will be no wedding. Now that you've

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Speaker 1: expressed yourself in this way, your fiance would not have

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Speaker 1: changed anyway because he was like this before and during.

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Speaker 1: He would still be a mama's boy in your marriage,

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Speaker 1: always putting his mom first. So consider yourself okay that

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Speaker 1: you dodged a big mama's boy bullet in this instance.

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Speaker 1: He's probably over there right now with Mama. So you

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Speaker 1: know this wouldn't have worked out for you.

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Speaker 2: Steve.

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Speaker 3: Let me just go to the bottom of the letter

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Speaker 3: and just lady, there's no way to say this to you.

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Speaker 3: He said his mom's feelings weigh heavily on him and

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Speaker 3: could affect me and him getting married. How can this be?

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Speaker 3: Is he going to always choose her over me? What

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Speaker 3: do I do?

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Speaker 2: Well?

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Speaker 3: Read the letter, and he always chose her over you?

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Speaker 3: He done chose her over everything. He ain't even live

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Speaker 3: in no regular life. Because I'm gonna tell you something

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Speaker 3: right now, i'd have read this letter. This ain't normal.

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Speaker 3: This ain't normal. Right here you're talking about he didn't

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Speaker 3: struggle or set boundaries with her because the guy she

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Speaker 3: was seeing for twenty years dumped her. Then you told

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Speaker 3: me in the letter the guy she was seeing was married. Okay,

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Speaker 3: so they just make dumb decisions all the time. Him

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Speaker 3: at her, He ain't had no real friends. And this

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Speaker 3: is where the letter got crazy for me. She said,

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Speaker 3: he did everything with his mom. Now listen to this,

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Speaker 3: like going to get massages.

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Speaker 2: Who get what?

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Speaker 3: Man go get a massage with his mama? Now daughters

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Speaker 3: and mamas do it all the time, But what't man

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Speaker 3: go get a massage with his mama? Going on vacations,

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Speaker 3: going on shopping sprees, and going to the nail salon?

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Speaker 2: Who go get they nails done with they mama? What

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Speaker 2: man do that? And everything was paid for by his mom?

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Speaker 3: Then she says, recognizing the red flags, I urged him

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Speaker 3: to grow up and break free from his mama. What

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Speaker 3: women stop collecting red flags, putting them in your trunk

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Speaker 3: When you see red flags, leave them in the ground.

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Speaker 3: Stop collecting red flags.

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Speaker 1: Hold it out there, shifted, Yeah, hold it right there.

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Speaker 1: We'll have part two of your response coming up at

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Speaker 1: twenty three minutes after the hour. Today's Strawberry letter. Subject

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Speaker 1: he said his mom is off limits. We'll get back

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Speaker 1: into it right after this. You're listening to Harvey Morning Show. Hey, everyone,

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Speaker 1: health question. Even though you're still thriving, still loving, still connecting,

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Speaker 1: did you know your immune system weakens with age. That's

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Speaker 1: where vaccines come in. They help train and strengthen your

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Speaker 1: immune response to fight off certain respiratory illnesses like flu Newmacaco, pneumonia, RSV,

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Speaker 1: and COVID nineteen this fall, ask your doctor which vaccines

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Speaker 1: you need and visit vaxsist dot com. That's vaexsist dot

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Speaker 1: com to schedule one or more of vaccines sponsored by Pfizer.

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Speaker 1: All right, come on, Steve, let's recap today's strawberry letter.

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Speaker 1: The subject is he said his mom is off limits.

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Speaker 1: You left off with women. Stop collecting red flags.

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Speaker 3: Steve, Ladies, y'all, this is letter is all wrong. Shirley said,

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Speaker 3: this is a mama's boy. This is a mama's boy.

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Speaker 3: In a severe case, they do everything together. What may

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Speaker 3: go get a massage with his mama, going on vacations together,

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Speaker 3: going on shopping sprees and going to the nail salon.

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Speaker 2: Who go get their nail done with their mama?

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Speaker 3: Can I tell y'all how much I loved dear loss

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Speaker 3: Ville Harvey. Can I tell you how much I loved

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Speaker 3: my mama?

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Speaker 2: I'm talking about love, telling like.

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Speaker 3: You you could not love your mother more than I

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Speaker 3: love mine. You can love her and be, but you not.

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Speaker 3: I'll hurt you about her even to this day. It's

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Speaker 3: just it's so crazy. She was the first woman I

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Speaker 3: ever loved, and I never stopped loving her. So but

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Speaker 3: we ain't ever went and got our nails done. Me

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Speaker 3: and my mama ain't help a went and got him

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Speaker 3: massage together. Me and my mama didn't go on vacations

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Speaker 3: together because what I'm finish do on vacations and down

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Speaker 3: at the massage parlor.

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Speaker 2: But Mama don't need to see this. So then you said.

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Speaker 3: You told him, recognizing the red flags, I urged him

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Speaker 3: to grow up and break free from his mom if

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Speaker 3: he had planned on having a future with me. Then

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Speaker 3: you said his mother was upset and said that I

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Speaker 3: was plotting to take her son from her. So, now

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Speaker 3: that's a huge red flag. Should have left it in

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Speaker 3: the ground. Ladies, like I said before, stopped collecting red flags.

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Speaker 2: That's your problem. Y'all. See these red flags and put

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Speaker 2: them in your car.

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Speaker 3: Now that we engage, where that comes from?

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Speaker 2: Did you not hear anything you text? Now we engage.

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Speaker 3: To the man that go get a nail down with

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Speaker 3: his mama, to the man to go get massages with

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Speaker 3: his mama, to the man to go on vacation with

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Speaker 3: his mama. Now that we engaged, they still spend a

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Speaker 3: lot of time together.

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Speaker 2: Dull, but now he invites me to join.

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Speaker 3: I lost my mama five years ago, and so his

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Speaker 3: mom has been helpful with planning the wedding.

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Speaker 2: I did so.

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Speaker 3: Then they were sitting at lunch and she asked the

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Speaker 3: mama did she have a problem with her? And the

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Speaker 3: mama just said, yeah, I got a problem with you.

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Speaker 3: And then you let her speak and she told you

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Speaker 3: all the issues that she had with you, and then

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Speaker 3: you told her all the issues I had with her.

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Speaker 3: My fiance sat there and let his mom take shots

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Speaker 3: at me.

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Speaker 2: What you thought he was gonna do?

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Speaker 3: He ain't been running nothing with his mama. But then

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Speaker 3: when I tried to say what I want to say,

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Speaker 3: he told me to watch your mouth. I left the

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Speaker 3: restaurant thinking things would be better since we cut through

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Speaker 3: the bs. What how did you lead a restaurant thinking

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Speaker 3: things would be better?

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Speaker 2: Did you? And what she said about you?

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Speaker 3: And then when you tried to say something right back

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Speaker 3: to her, watch your mouth. You thought things were gonna

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Speaker 3: be better, but it's gotten worse. My fiance told me

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Speaker 3: that his mama is off limits to me from now on.

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Speaker 3: He told me that I talked to his mama like

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Speaker 3: I was her equal, and she's done with me.

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Speaker 2: Fev.

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Speaker 3: He said his mama's feeling his way heavy on him

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Speaker 3: and could affect me and him getting married. It already had.

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Speaker 3: How can this be? Is he going to always choose

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Speaker 3: her over me?

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Speaker 2: Yes?

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Speaker 3: What do I do? Cut your losses? Take them red

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Speaker 3: flags out the truck of your car and throw them

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Speaker 3: out on the side of the road somewhere and drive off.

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Speaker 2: Listen.

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Speaker 3: I don't remember how the movie Remember the movie Eddie

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Speaker 3: Murphy did norb it?

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Speaker 2: Yeah? Yeah, Now, I didn't.

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Speaker 3: Know who the lady was, the big lady that Eddie played,

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Speaker 3: that's his mama in this and let.

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Speaker 2: You know what this is.

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Speaker 3: Big rescuses this. You dn't norbit and if I wish you,

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Speaker 3: I would run. And I don't even do movie analogies,

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Speaker 3: but that's what I see happening.

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Speaker 2: Lady, if you don't get away from.

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Speaker 3: This boy who will never ever be your man because

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Speaker 3: he's so busy being hubboy.

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Speaker 2: You can't be a boy and a.

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Speaker 3: Man at the same time. You cannot do those two

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Speaker 3: things at once. They are in direct conflict. You can't

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Speaker 3: be a boy and a man at the same time.

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Speaker 2: Nop. Well, good luck.

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Speaker 1: Post your comments on today's Strawberry Letter at Steve HARVEFM

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Speaker 1: on Instagram and Facebook, and check out the Strawberry Letter

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Speaker 1: podcast on the free iHeartRadio app out Jeffrey never sounded

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Speaker 1: so good. You can download it today. Coming up at

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Speaker 1: forty six minutes after the hour, we got sports talk

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Speaker 1: with Tommy and for Junior. Right after this, you're listening

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Speaker 1: to the Steve Harvey Morning Show.