Speaker 1: Who baby A baby. I need you, Oh hell, I
Speaker 1: need you. What to Expect is a production of I
Speaker 1: Heart Radio. I'm your host Heidi Murko, and I'm a
Speaker 1: mom on a mission, a mission to help you know
Speaker 1: what to expect every step of the way. So you're
Speaker 1: not a fan of you are not alone. I think
Speaker 1: we can all say that there has been a lot
Speaker 1: not to love about the year. Many of us can't
Speaker 1: wait to get behind us, and I'm not even going
Speaker 1: to go there, because that's not why we're here today.
Speaker 1: We are here to celebrate what we did love about,
Speaker 1: the bright spots we've been able to find and hopefully
Speaker 1: focus on during an otherwise super gloomy year. The little
Speaker 1: things that meant a lot are silver linings. Earlier in
Speaker 1: the year, we challenge moms to push back the clouds,
Speaker 1: discover those silver linings peeking through, and share them on
Speaker 1: what to expect. And now we're going to share some
Speaker 1: of those with you and invite you to share your own.
Speaker 1: I happen to be here with one of my silver linings. Emma.
Speaker 1: I like to think I'm your greatest silver lining, but okay,
Speaker 1: I'll take it you're one of them. Let's put it
Speaker 1: that way. So this has been a hard year. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's not been great. Let's not sugarcoat it, but let's
Speaker 1: talk about some of our silver linings. What were yours?
Speaker 1: My silver lining is watching my two sons become friends
Speaker 1: and get this bomb that they probably wouldn't have a
Speaker 1: Seby would be in preschool, Lennox would be in school,
Speaker 1: and they would have their own separate lives, but they
Speaker 1: only have had each other, and they rely on each other,
Speaker 1: and they learned from each other. And you know, obviously
Speaker 1: they fight and they drive me easy. They learned for
Speaker 1: the better and the worst, right, But you know, watching
Speaker 1: that bond develop has been one of the most amazing
Speaker 1: things I've ever witnessed in my life. And I am
Speaker 1: so incredibly grateful to be not only seeing it, but
Speaker 1: like living it and experiencing it, and you know, watching
Speaker 1: this friendship blossom. And Lennox tells me literally every single
Speaker 1: day he doesn't want to get married. He wants to
Speaker 1: live an apartment in a modern house with his brother,
Speaker 1: have bunk beds and play video games all day. And
Speaker 1: that's literally like the movie Stepbrothers. And it kind of
Speaker 1: freaks me out, Like, come on, guys, but you know what,
Speaker 1: God bless, I love it. They're my silver lining for me.
Speaker 1: The hard part of was actually, and people are surprised
Speaker 1: to hear this because they think you're always on a plane.
Speaker 1: It's so exhausting, But not being on the road and
Speaker 1: being at home has been the hard part because when
Speaker 1: I'm on the road, I get to be hugging thousands
Speaker 1: of moms and snuggling thousands of babies. I can't imagine
Speaker 1: your withdrawals right now. Mom, Oh, it's so hard. It's
Speaker 1: so hard. And you know the virtual hugs that I
Speaker 1: get when I do events virtually, you know, it's a
Speaker 1: stop gap measure. It's way better than nothing at all.
Speaker 1: But it's just not the same. But the funny thing
Speaker 1: is that my silver lining has also been not being
Speaker 1: on the road, and that's because no, I don't get
Speaker 1: to hug thousands of moms, but I do get to
Speaker 1: hug my grandson's more often than I otherwise would have,
Speaker 1: and we get to have weekly family dinners, which we
Speaker 1: never were able to do before. Of course, that means
Speaker 1: I have to cook every week, So that's maybe not
Speaker 1: maybe that's a cloud, and that's overlyances overligning for us,
Speaker 1: though yeah, for sure. But I get to see so
Speaker 1: much more of Lennox and Seby than I otherwise would,
Speaker 1: and for me, that's about as good as it gets.
Speaker 1: And I also one other perk is that I actually
Speaker 1: had time, finally to do a podcast and do it
Speaker 1: with you, because from the road it wouldn't be so easy. No,
Speaker 1: So God bless that. So we heard from so many
Speaker 1: moms in our What to Expect community about their silver linings,
Speaker 1: and I just want to share some of the themes
Speaker 1: because I think they're super relatable. Please, So, if you
Speaker 1: were pregnant during the pandemic or you're still pregnant during
Speaker 1: the pandemic, I feel like a lot of people got
Speaker 1: pregnant during the pandemic. That that is true, that there's
Speaker 1: a lot of silver linings up there. But some of
Speaker 1: the things that they mentioned, it's funny I hadn't even
Speaker 1: thought of. It's like not having to throw up at
Speaker 1: the office, Like you get to throw up in the
Speaker 1: comfort of your home. That's a plus, right, that is
Speaker 1: a plus. Yeah, And you're not always running to the
Speaker 1: bathroom to pee, or you don't. I mean, obviously you're
Speaker 1: still running to your bathroom, but it's a lot closer,
Speaker 1: and you don't have to explain why you're always getting
Speaker 1: up to pe. You probably don't have to spill the
Speaker 1: pregnancy beans as early because you're not in the office
Speaker 1: and when you're on zoom meetings you only see the
Speaker 1: top half. You don't have to spend a lot of
Speaker 1: money on maternity clothes. Lots of moms mentioned that because
Speaker 1: you don't have to buy the work maternity clothes, you
Speaker 1: can just actually do your husband's sweatpants as you grow.
Speaker 1: You don't have to fit yours hole and feed into
Speaker 1: work shoes. You can be barefoot and pregnant. So when
Speaker 1: I asked you about your solar linings on Facebook, so
Speaker 1: many of you sent me pictures of your little bundles
Speaker 1: of joy, and there are lots and lots of them.
Speaker 1: Here are some pregnancy silver linings from what to expect
Speaker 1: Community Moms was the best year because we created a baby.
Speaker 1: She's still cooking, but we couldn't have asked for a
Speaker 1: bigger blessing this year. Second that being able to spend
Speaker 1: more time with my hubby before the baby arrives. This
Speaker 1: is a great one, as funny as it sounds. Not
Speaker 1: having to wear upra as these girls have gotten so
Speaker 1: big during my pregnancy. Even my new bigger bras are uncomfortable.
Speaker 1: I haven't worn abroad the entire pandemic. I'm not wearing
Speaker 1: one right now. I can feel my boobs on my stomach.
Speaker 1: You know what, I'm living it up. I feel your girlfriend.
Speaker 1: For the record, I'm wearing a bra. You do wear
Speaker 1: a bra, I don't. I do. I believe in support,
Speaker 1: so Kelly said, not having to commit to events and
Speaker 1: being able to relax more amen in sweats. Girlfriend, I
Speaker 1: feel you. H then you don't have to cancel and
Speaker 1: you don't want to go and you can just it's
Speaker 1: just not happening. Great, you don't have to be the
Speaker 1: party pooper, that's right. So we also heard from new
Speaker 1: parents and young families who were thankful to have a
Speaker 1: chance to bond as a family. Emma, you spoke a
Speaker 1: little bit about that. But with new families, often baby visitors,
Speaker 1: grandparents coming from everywhere around the country, family friends, everybody
Speaker 1: wants a piece of the baby, and during the pandemic
Speaker 1: that's been curtailed significantly, and that means fewer visitors. That's
Speaker 1: the downside, but it also meant that you know, families
Speaker 1: as a little unit got to bond um siblings had
Speaker 1: a chance to bond with each other. With a new baby,
Speaker 1: you didn't have to worry so much about visitors bearing
Speaker 1: germs and unsolicited advice. You didn't have to clean up
Speaker 1: after them, you didn't have to prepare food for them,
Speaker 1: you didn't have to put on a bra for them.
Speaker 1: That's right. And then with the beads sometimes came the good.
Speaker 1: So families couldn't visit. But that also meant that in
Speaker 1: the birthing room, if your mother and your mother in
Speaker 1: law were both vying for a spot next to your
Speaker 1: berthing bed, and you actually didn't want either one there,
Speaker 1: or maybe you just wanted one of them. Either way,
Speaker 1: nobody could be there except your partner. You know that's great.
Speaker 1: You could be like I wanted you both there nobody's
Speaker 1: but inside you're like, no, I want any of their
Speaker 1: review in there. Definitely, Catherine from what to Expect community
Speaker 1: message boards said, since the hospital didn't allow visitors the
Speaker 1: first few days post birth, I felt like we were
Speaker 1: in this little bubble, just the three of us, exhausted
Speaker 1: yet in awe of this little miracle, fumbling around figuring
Speaker 1: things out. As first time parents without others always taking over,
Speaker 1: allowing us to actually learn and get to know each other.
Speaker 1: I think this is such a silver lining because inevitably
Speaker 1: family members, if they're at home with you, were in
Speaker 1: the hospital room with you, they're gonna try to take over,
Speaker 1: and that keeps you from learning, you know, the job
Speaker 1: on the job. And we have some more examples of
Speaker 1: family silver linings from my Facebook page. Kelly said the
Speaker 1: time I got to spend with my husband and daughter,
Speaker 1: especially since she's just two, and I feel lucky that
Speaker 1: she has two full time parents. So sweet. Amanda said,
Speaker 1: we got to save a lot of money on daycare.
Speaker 1: Yep h, I proved to my office that we can
Speaker 1: work remote. Most awesome is the amount of vacation time
Speaker 1: I've been able to save. We were actually able to
Speaker 1: go on a family isolation vacation this year. Oh, isolation vacation.
Speaker 1: That's amazing. That's a new term for and Sophia said,
Speaker 1: definitely the best year for us. Of course, that's before
Speaker 1: all I'll broke loose. We heard a lot about moms
Speaker 1: realizing their own strength and valuable family time you would
Speaker 1: never have otherwise gotten. Kaala on Facebook said my second
Speaker 1: was born, and I realized how strong I could be.
Speaker 1: And I feel like I'm starting to embrace simplicity. Emma,
Speaker 1: how about you? Are you embracing simplicity? I mean, I'm
Speaker 1: definitely not as high maintenance as I was. Figuring a
Speaker 1: sweatshirt and sweatpants with dirty hair. I used to to
Speaker 1: think I'd need a manicure and pedicure. Not anymore, Angela said.
Speaker 1: We gained so much more family time. I actually really
Speaker 1: enjoyed the isolation. It brought back a lot of family
Speaker 1: traditions that we all seem to overlook as time goes by.
Speaker 1: I think we all learned how to communicate better. Good
Speaker 1: for you, Angela, So Christie said, and she's one of
Speaker 1: my military mom's hobby is shipping out starting in January
Speaker 1: for a couple of years. A couple of years. Wow,
Speaker 1: that's a lot. So thanks to COVID, we got to
Speaker 1: spend so much more family time with him before he left.
Speaker 1: This one makes me so happy, Like it's like I
Speaker 1: actually am a little tary eyed like that to me
Speaker 1: is just amazing. Her husband's not just upstairs in this office,
Speaker 1: he's in another country. That's one strong mama woman, you know.
Speaker 1: Hearing these stories about silver linings really, you know, kind
Speaker 1: of helps me embrace everything a little bit more um
Speaker 1: and see the positive because you know, in the munday
Speaker 1: and day to day basis, like when you're you know,
Speaker 1: really struggling and the last thing you're thinking about is
Speaker 1: silver linings, and I think it's important to stop and
Speaker 1: be like, you know what, there are positives here and
Speaker 1: we should be enjoying them and you know, thinking about
Speaker 1: those and not just like all the negatives. So I
Speaker 1: really appreciate this episode and I'm really feeling more empowered
Speaker 1: than I was when we started. Well that's good. There's
Speaker 1: another silver lining right there there. It is baby, And
Speaker 1: one of my silver linings too, is that I've gotten
Speaker 1: to spend more time on social media with my mom's
Speaker 1: um that's where it's at. So I've embraced that. I've
Speaker 1: gotten to see your babies grow and there's nothing like it.
Speaker 1: So share your silver linings with us on what to
Speaker 1: Expect message boards or on our social media using the
Speaker 1: hashtag silver Linings challenge so we can keep the celebration
Speaker 1: going as we close out and greet one. Because lots
Speaker 1: of love and so many wishes for a healthy, safe
Speaker 1: and very happy holiday season from Emma, Me and the
Speaker 1: whole What to Expect family, Baby Love, My baby Love.
Speaker 1: I need you, Oh how I need you. Thanks for listening.
Speaker 1: Remember I'm always here for you. What to Expect is
Speaker 1: always here for you. We're all in this together. For
Speaker 1: more on what you heard on today's episodes, visit what
Speaker 1: to Expect dot com slash podcast. You can also check
Speaker 1: out What to Expect when You're Expecting, What to Expect
Speaker 1: the First Year, and the What to Expect FP and
Speaker 1: We want to hear from you. Connect with us on
Speaker 1: our community message board or on our social media. You
Speaker 1: can find me at Heidi Murkoff and Emma at Emma
Speaker 1: Being w t E and of course at What to Expect.
Speaker 1: Baby Love is performed by Riley Pieter. What to Expect
Speaker 1: is a production of I Heart Radio. From more shows
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