Speaker 1: Hell I Suck at Dating with Me Youngler and Dared
Speaker 1: Haven Heart Radio podcast. Hey, welcome back to uh what
Speaker 1: is the podcast called? Help I Suck at Dating? Of
Speaker 1: course I remember, I'm losing my mind. I've been at
Speaker 1: my in laws for over a month. How is everybody
Speaker 1: out there? And suck Army Land. We have a great
Speaker 1: episode coming up for you. Uh. We have a special, wonderful, amazing,
Speaker 1: beautiful guest who is joining us right now, but before
Speaker 1: I introduced her because she's been on the podcast before.
Speaker 1: We have a great guest coming up. Maya as Ratti
Speaker 1: is coming up and we're gonna talk about dating heading
Speaker 1: into one which will hopefully be a little bit easier
Speaker 1: on all of us. Dean, First of all, how the
Speaker 1: hell are you? Hey, Jared, I'm very uh displeased with
Speaker 1: you that you forgot the name of our podcast. Of
Speaker 1: course I didn't forget. I was just trying to do
Speaker 1: something different. You know, there's only so many ways we
Speaker 1: can intro a podcast. I was like, let's just do
Speaker 1: let me pretend that I forgot the name of it
Speaker 1: for a second, and it really just didn't land. All right,
Speaker 1: I'm like a stand up comedian right now, it's fine,
Speaker 1: it's fine. That's a nutshell, So at the very least,
Speaker 1: it's exemplary area of what we've all been through. But
Speaker 1: I'm good. I think you uh kind of alluded to
Speaker 1: it a little bit. But why don't we just jump
Speaker 1: into Katie and see how she's doing? Because who that
Speaker 1: cares about us? He cares about For your response to you, guys,
Speaker 1: k Katie Morton, Ladies and gentlemen, what do you mean
Speaker 1: our response? I was waiting to see how y'all were. Oh,
Speaker 1: we're fine, but we don't care about us. We care
Speaker 1: about you. We want to hear more about Katie Moe.
Speaker 1: We've had you on the podcast a million times. You're
Speaker 1: essentially the third most consistent thing on this podcast, the
Speaker 1: first being shared, the second being all of our producers
Speaker 1: being great, the third being you, and then the fourth
Speaker 1: me showing up on time. So congratulations on cracking the
Speaker 1: top three. But fellow's name Katie. Obviously it's been while
Speaker 1: since we checked in with you. Um, we talked a
Speaker 1: little bit before we started recording this cast. But you're
Speaker 1: what and you're in Orlando now with your family? Is
Speaker 1: that right? Yeah? I'm in Orlando at my parents house.
Speaker 1: I haven't really been getting too close to my family
Speaker 1: because I have traveled, so I'm on a little bit
Speaker 1: of a different floor. But we passed each other like
Speaker 1: ships passing in the night and here. Yeah, but I
Speaker 1: will get to the after some time has gone by.
Speaker 1: We'll get to spend it with them before I go
Speaker 1: off on my way. Yeah. Well, you're speaking there with
Speaker 1: a little bit of English accent, which if you haven't,
Speaker 1: if you don't follow Katie, which I'm sure everybody already does, Katie,
Speaker 1: you are dating a British man. That was a terrible
Speaker 1: English accent. That was Scottish. It was something alright. Anyway,
Speaker 1: back to you tell us about your boyfriend. Oh well, um,
Speaker 1: I'm dating an english Man man now I'm english Man.
Speaker 1: He's so great. Um, what do you want to know?
Speaker 1: How did you guys meet Sells everything? Oh? God, you guys,
Speaker 1: because did he slide in the old d M S? Yeah?
Speaker 1: What's this whole security number? Bank information? Things of this nature? Okay,
Speaker 1: we met two weeks before Paradise. The day after I
Speaker 1: filed my Paradise intro. We met. Um, I'm gonna do
Speaker 1: like a Q and I probably with him at some point,
Speaker 1: So I'm going to keep some things. But wait a minute.
Speaker 1: Holy you met two weeks before you left for Paradise,
Speaker 1: and were you like, Okay, I'm going to go to
Speaker 1: Paradise and see how it works out. And then a
Speaker 1: month later you got back, You're like, okay, I'm engaged.
Speaker 1: Oh no, no, no. I met him on the street.
Speaker 1: He pulled me aside on Sunset Boulevard like he was
Speaker 1: skateboarding and saw me, and I was like, I think
Speaker 1: we were I was going to dinner, but I think
Speaker 1: it was either that night or the night after. It
Speaker 1: was Hannahby's we're watching Hannaby season. Anyway, he pulled me aside.
Speaker 1: It was like, maybe have a chat, and you were like, yeah,
Speaker 1: if you speak in that accident all night, we can
Speaker 1: have a chat. Chats all night, buddy. Um. But then
Speaker 1: he all we did was given Instagram of information. That's
Speaker 1: what we exchanged. And later that night he said like,
Speaker 1: how was your day? And I'm guessing that's how we
Speaker 1: said it because that's what it looks like. And I
Speaker 1: was like, oh, yeah, it was great, and then we
Speaker 1: didn't talk. Like he didn't respond back, but I also
Speaker 1: wasn't concerned about him responding back either because I was
Speaker 1: like headspace and paradise and was super busy, just like
Speaker 1: getting ready for it, So he never got my message
Speaker 1: and I never cared to see if he got my message.
Speaker 1: So then it was almost like we just lived separate lives.
Speaker 1: And then later obviously everything has happened. And then a
Speaker 1: couple of months ago he saw me on a dating
Speaker 1: app and I had showed up on Rya in London
Speaker 1: and like, Hey, are you in London? Like, I'd love
Speaker 1: to take you to dinner before you leave, because like
Speaker 1: I don't know if we're going to have an opportunity
Speaker 1: to match on the app, and I was like, I'm
Speaker 1: actually not. But it's really interesting that the dating app
Speaker 1: thought I exhausted all options in the US. That is
Speaker 1: pretty funny. I was like, Wow, that's that's interesting. Why
Speaker 1: is it sending me global for the For the record,
Speaker 1: just to be clear for the listeners out there that
Speaker 1: might not be familiar with Riya, it is a dating
Speaker 1: app for famous people. That's why Katie is on it,
Speaker 1: So I'm assuming this guy has to be some sort
Speaker 1: of famous person as well. Is that right? Is not
Speaker 1: all famous people? I think there's like tears of riot
Speaker 1: to be honest, I think that there's like Channing Tatum,
Speaker 1: but then there's like a and there's like I was
Speaker 1: gonna say, Jared similar. Yeah, I was on Riya there
Speaker 1: for a little while, Dean. Have you ever been on Riya?
Speaker 1: I have been on Riya and I'm at for some
Speaker 1: pretty interesting people, but nothing obviously ever came from it.
Speaker 1: But you know what I'm saying, it's not like famous people.
Speaker 1: It's just like there's some people and well, listen, I
Speaker 1: agree with you that it's not just famous people. Uh
Speaker 1: So for instance, like I I referred to a a friend
Speaker 1: who uh you know, works a very normal job and
Speaker 1: he got accepted somehow, so so they have this weird
Speaker 1: criteria for what is what isn't what isn't allowed? Um.
Speaker 1: And then I remember reading some story like Amanda Stanton
Speaker 1: couldn't get on Riot even though she was trying for
Speaker 1: a long time or something. It's like, well, if Amanda
Speaker 1: can't get on, but my friends Sam can get on.
Speaker 1: And some of the people, some of the people I
Speaker 1: match with were like world famous gymnasts that would have
Speaker 1: won like multiple gold medals and like crazy stuff like that,
Speaker 1: And I'm like, whoa, this is super cool. But for
Speaker 1: me personally, it was just like an app to be like, WHOA,
Speaker 1: that's cool to see that person on the stating app,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean. That's how kind of how
Speaker 1: it was for me to like, it wasn't I didn't
Speaker 1: see that many people in there or anything. Didn't go
Speaker 1: on too many Riot dates. But anyway, he's on the
Speaker 1: app and he didn't want to wait to match me
Speaker 1: or whatever because he didn't know if I was going
Speaker 1: to be hanging out on the app all in London
Speaker 1: even though it wasn't there, so uh, he decided to
Speaker 1: reach out on Instagram. Was like, asked me to dinner
Speaker 1: and I was like, can't come, not in London. And
Speaker 1: then I was like, oh, but how do I know you?
Speaker 1: Because I saw from before Paradise the messages and I
Speaker 1: was like, remind me how I know you? And he
Speaker 1: was like, oh, I actually met you on the streets
Speaker 1: of l A and you were with your friend Hannah.
Speaker 1: I was with Hannah. Gee said you were with your
Speaker 1: friend Hannah, and I was like, oh my gosh. And
Speaker 1: then I remembered it clicked and I was like, oh,
Speaker 1: I know who this is. And then we just had
Speaker 1: some chats and then he scheduled a FaceTime date for
Speaker 1: the next day, and then we just kept going from there.
Speaker 1: What made you want to go to England? Like when
Speaker 1: we were like, Okay, I'm gonna travel across an ocean
Speaker 1: for this dude, not only across an ocean but across
Speaker 1: the cotton as well. Because you're going from l A
Speaker 1: all the way to the East Coast and then to England.
Speaker 1: That's a that's a commitment right there. It's a jump.
Speaker 1: So and like, I really it was interesting. So we're facetiming.
Speaker 1: We faced him for a really long time, but I
Speaker 1: really eyes there was something in my gut that was
Speaker 1: like this guy is great for me, and I'm gonna
Speaker 1: listen to my gut this time, because when I don't
Speaker 1: listen to my gut, things go awry. So I'm like,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna listening to my gut, like this guy is great.
Speaker 1: Like obviously it wasn't rushing anything. We talked for a
Speaker 1: couple of weeks, but I was like, this is gonna
Speaker 1: die a slow death on face time or someone's gonna
Speaker 1: have to make a move and he can't. He plays
Speaker 1: um soccer or football, but soccer over there is you
Speaker 1: a professional player. Yeah, but he yeah, it's like it's
Speaker 1: a very complicated system. He's uh, but yeah, so he
Speaker 1: plays professionally, but he so he doesn't get any days
Speaker 1: off pretty much. And so I was like, oh, he
Speaker 1: can't come here. Um, but I was like, this is
Speaker 1: gonna die a very slow death, or someone's gonna have
Speaker 1: to make a move, and it looks like that someone's
Speaker 1: going to have to be me. So then we're talking
Speaker 1: and he's like, gosh, I wish he could come to London.
Speaker 1: I'm like, what if I did? And he's like that
Speaker 1: would be sick, and I'm like, let's do it. And
Speaker 1: then I was just like, I mean, being on a
Speaker 1: plane is Honestly, being on that plane was safer than
Speaker 1: being in l a because there was probably max. Twenty
Speaker 1: people on the plane, on that huge plane, and they
Speaker 1: were like it was sad because they said, this is
Speaker 1: the last time this plane is flying because there's not
Speaker 1: enough people to fly. It was sad. They blasted Adele
Speaker 1: for the last thirty minutes of the fly and but
Speaker 1: attendants were crying and hugging each other, and then I started,
Speaker 1: this is a moment for me, this is a moment
Speaker 1: for them, it was Virgin Airlines. I got it out there.
Speaker 1: Oh well, that's so sad. God, it's so sad. Like
Speaker 1: even we ordered take out from a local business right
Speaker 1: down the street, and like every time we go in there,
Speaker 1: there's just nobody in there and the poor manager just
Speaker 1: standing there with you know, twiddling their thumbs and it's
Speaker 1: like this is this is depressing. So I'm sorry. Continue. Yeah.
Speaker 1: So I had the like aisles in front of me
Speaker 1: and behind me just completely empty. I was laying I
Speaker 1: laid down a slept for for eight of the nine hours,
Speaker 1: so um yeah. And then I got there and I
Speaker 1: had to quarantine and then we met Oh yeah, because
Speaker 1: he's a professional soccer place, so they probably have pretty
Speaker 1: stingent rules about when you can see someone from the outside. Yeah.
Speaker 1: And also I had to quarantine because, um just because
Speaker 1: it was the rules. Yeah. And so also I was like, Okay,
Speaker 1: how can I make this to where I can go
Speaker 1: and it doesn't have to just be for leisure. So
Speaker 1: my friend's family owns a business there, so like, um that,
Speaker 1: and she's from my hometown, so I offered to like
Speaker 1: do help them with work. I went over there so
Speaker 1: then I could go for like business. So it was
Speaker 1: it was like a good It all worked out perfectly
Speaker 1: and then we got to me and it was like
Speaker 1: I had known him for a really long time. And
Speaker 1: so so the plan, I know, you said you're gonna
Speaker 1: answer this Q and a later on on your so
Speaker 1: we don't want to spoil to many things, but you
Speaker 1: said you're you're going back out to London. Yes, So
Speaker 1: that is a good sign obviously because it went well
Speaker 1: enough the first time. It went so great the first time.
Speaker 1: And it was interesting because I had a quarantine so
Speaker 1: I didn't really get to see him, and then when
Speaker 1: I got to see him, England went into lockdown, so
Speaker 1: I had about I had a couple of days in
Speaker 1: London where I got to spend time in London before
Speaker 1: the lockdown but after my quarantine, and I was super
Speaker 1: lucky because for else I would have never seen actual London.
Speaker 1: So I actually did get to see the city a
Speaker 1: little bit, but very like, very quickly. So let me
Speaker 1: ask you this, are you gonna move to freaking England?
Speaker 1: What's going on with your kid? And now I'm not
Speaker 1: going to move to England right now, It's not any
Speaker 1: time soon. Um, We're just it's a time where I
Speaker 1: don't have to technically both places are on lockdown l A.
Speaker 1: And the one thing is I do miss my freaking talk.
Speaker 1: I love bears, Bear the Bears with you right now.
Speaker 1: He's with me right now, which is amazing. But he
Speaker 1: can't come to England or else. He will have to
Speaker 1: get taken from me. What and who probably does he
Speaker 1: have to be in the cargo? Can he be in
Speaker 1: the plane with you because he's an emotional animal, but
Speaker 1: he has to have a pet passport which can take
Speaker 1: up to three months to process or something like this
Speaker 1: for you. So it's a little complicated. But I'm going back,
Speaker 1: and I know it's fairly soon to go back, but
Speaker 1: it's like a newer relationship and we figured and we
Speaker 1: might as well go go for long periods closer together
Speaker 1: to establish that solid foundation and then we can space
Speaker 1: it out. And yeah, are we calling him your boyfriend? Um?
Speaker 1: I call him. I don't really call him my boyfriend.
Speaker 1: I just call him. I just call him James. Well,
Speaker 1: that's an interesting conversation because when as an adult like
Speaker 1: are you like, hey, a, are are we boyfriend girlfriend?
Speaker 1: It feels like such a high school conversation. But you
Speaker 1: kind of have to establish it, like I we're definitely exclusive.
Speaker 1: We definitely established that. Like I was like, listen, I'm
Speaker 1: not going to be coming to England if we're not exclusive.
Speaker 1: That's got to be just right out there, and he
Speaker 1: was like, of course not. I'm like, yes, of course not.
Speaker 1: So you guys are exclusive. I think that. I mean,
Speaker 1: I think in today's day and age, that conversation means
Speaker 1: you guys are boyfriend and girlfriends. Yeah. I think, well,
Speaker 1: there's so many lights here. I think that exclusive is
Speaker 1: good enough for me because yeah, the boyfriend and girlfriend chap,
Speaker 1: I don't know. Well, that's what That's what the boyfriend
Speaker 1: girlfriend chat has evolved into, is asking whether you're exclusive
Speaker 1: or not. I think I think it's a matter of
Speaker 1: getting older a and times just changing B. But because like, yeah,
Speaker 1: we're not in high school anymore, you're not gonna say exactly. Okay,
Speaker 1: let me ask you this, what the hell is the
Speaker 1: difference between being exclusive and being boyfriend girlfriend? That's what
Speaker 1: I'm saying. Is there the same thing that's today's day
Speaker 1: and age of asking someone to be your boyfriend is
Speaker 1: the tough exclusivity? Wait though, Dean in England when I
Speaker 1: was there people were going from exclusivity to boyfriend and
Speaker 1: girlfriend and they were asking in a very promposal way.
Speaker 1: Like it was an example like they they are definitely
Speaker 1: where people with stages. Like an example, one of his
Speaker 1: friends was dating someone exclusively and then he goes, all right,
Speaker 1: I think I'm ready to ask her to be my girlfriend.
Speaker 1: And I'm like, wait, you guys are exclusive, and he's like,
Speaker 1: I know, is there like a timetable over there? Like Okay,
Speaker 1: we're gonna go on a few dates and then we're
Speaker 1: gonna become exclusive for like a month or two and
Speaker 1: see how it goes, and then if it goes well
Speaker 1: after two months, then we'll become boyfriend girlfriend. See I
Speaker 1: don't really know what the timetable is, but I was
Speaker 1: getting the gist that there is definitely a longer period
Speaker 1: of time to where people decide boyfriend and girlfriend. Because
Speaker 1: when I feel like what I was getting the gist of,
Speaker 1: at least within that group, was that once your boyfriend
Speaker 1: and girlfriend, you're like, I'm basic like this person, I
Speaker 1: definitely see myself marrying. I've got a question for you, Katie. So,
Speaker 1: UH might get a little too personally here, but when
Speaker 1: you start dating someone Uh, there's always that that moment
Speaker 1: where things get intimate, right, But if you if you're
Speaker 1: traveling literally six thousand miles to see someone, what is
Speaker 1: kind of like that? What is the expectation like? Because
Speaker 1: from what I've happies together, it sounds like you guys,
Speaker 1: haven't you been romantic or anything like that, But now
Speaker 1: all of a sudden, you're flying twelve hours to go
Speaker 1: see this guy, So like, what is the expectation? Is
Speaker 1: there an expectation? How did you guys handle that whole situation?
Speaker 1: Like did you look after you got to quarantine, once
Speaker 1: you got to London, did you then stay with him
Speaker 1: the rest of the time at his apartment or flat
Speaker 1: or whatever it's called. Uh, what was kind of the
Speaker 1: whole process there? Um? Yeah, that's actually a really good question.
Speaker 1: I I that question popped into my head right before
Speaker 1: I left. So then I gave him a call because
Speaker 1: I was like, listen, I'm not coming over here just
Speaker 1: to sleep with you. And then I'm not I'm not
Speaker 1: just going to be your American piece of ass. And
Speaker 1: then it's addition to that, right, well, I'm just saying
Speaker 1: like come on. So I was just like okay, and
Speaker 1: he was like, of course not. And I was like,
Speaker 1: here's the boundaries. So I sat clear boundaries when when
Speaker 1: I was there and then or before I got there,
Speaker 1: and I mean like we were sleeping in the same
Speaker 1: bed when we hadn't even kissed yet at point. So
Speaker 1: I definitely was like taking it pretty slow. But at
Speaker 1: the same time, slow is relative to every different person um.
Speaker 1: But yeah, there was no expectation on his end. He
Speaker 1: was literally just like getting to know me, and we
Speaker 1: went on a couple of dates and then when it
Speaker 1: was locked down though, it was like, oh, England walked
Speaker 1: down and we had to move in and I was like, well,
Speaker 1: this is escalating quickly. This is escalated quickly. At least
Speaker 1: you're gonna know if it's going to work out. And
Speaker 1: it's like a bachelor, you know, where everything is just
Speaker 1: on a short time table. Yeah, it honestly didn't feel
Speaker 1: too It fell way more comfortable than Paradise, and it
Speaker 1: was kind of a similar situation like timeline. Well, let
Speaker 1: me ask about that. So this is your first relationship
Speaker 1: since being engaged. What has that been like for you? Mhm,
Speaker 1: way better? All right, let's just leave it at that. No, No, no,
Speaker 1: let's let's expound upon that a little bit, way way better.
Speaker 1: Why that's funny, Um, I've established like my own personal boundaries.
Speaker 1: I'm listening to my gut a lot more. I think
Speaker 1: I like lost that maybe ability in Paradise. I was
Speaker 1: so I felt like at one point I just didn't
Speaker 1: even do it myself. So I'm just enjoying I'm just
Speaker 1: not and not putting pressure on it, but also getting
Speaker 1: all of the reassurance I could have never even asked
Speaker 1: for because I'm just like, you know what, after my experience,
Speaker 1: I'm literally never going to settle for anything less than
Speaker 1: something that makes me feel an incredible and I'm keep
Speaker 1: living my life and if it fits with my life
Speaker 1: and fits with like I'm such like a lovely person
Speaker 1: that if this person isn't for me, I will know.
Speaker 1: And so far, so good. I'm going to google all
Speaker 1: English soccer players named James and figure out exactly who
Speaker 1: he is. But that's going to take a little bit
Speaker 1: of time, and in the meantime, we're gonna take one
Speaker 1: quick break Before we get to the break, though, Katie,
Speaker 1: just one final question for you, and I think it's
Speaker 1: the most important question that we've asked on this podcast.
Speaker 1: So far is are you happy? Yes? And yes I am,
Speaker 1: And I wanted just say like I'm happy, I was happy,
Speaker 1: were gaining happiness before James. I just like to put
Speaker 1: that out there because I think that that's important that
Speaker 1: you don't need a guy to be happy and so, um,
Speaker 1: but yeah, I'm happy and then plus I get a
Speaker 1: little additional bonus happy. I think that's awesomely a great
Speaker 1: message and I think that's very important to point out too,
Speaker 1: is you're not finding happiness in the in this guy,
Speaker 1: but you have found it in yourself and then you
Speaker 1: found Sir James Madison UH of Coventry, England. Perhaps that's
Speaker 1: his name. I don't know, Maybe it is, maybe it's not.
Speaker 1: We're gonna take a quick break. Jared and I had
Speaker 1: a great interview last a couple of days ago. We're
Speaker 1: gonna get to that, and then we're gonna jump into
Speaker 1: some final questions here with Katie as well. Um, so
Speaker 1: stay tuned for all that. Hey, welcome back to help
Speaker 1: I suck at dating. We have a very special guest
Speaker 1: who is joining us via zoom because you know, uh,
Speaker 1: she is the c d O of Rewarding Relationships, which
Speaker 1: is also known as the Chief Dating Officer. It is
Speaker 1: Maya is rot y Maya? How are you? I'm awesome, guys.
Speaker 1: I'm so excited to meet you. You're my favorite podcast.
Speaker 1: I'll get out of here. You're just you're just being polite.
Speaker 1: You are being polite. There's no way you're where your
Speaker 1: favorite podcast. Guys. This is what I do. So I'd
Speaker 1: love to help people who stuck up dating. Sweet Well,
Speaker 1: let's help. Let's help all ten of our listeners as
Speaker 1: much as we possibly can this episode. Um, thanks for
Speaker 1: joining us. We obviously appreciate having an expert's opinion because
Speaker 1: all we ever really do is just me and Jared.
Speaker 1: Just you are our nonsensical nonsense to the listeners out
Speaker 1: they're giving our you know, unsolicited advice. But it's nice
Speaker 1: to have someone that actually kind of knows what they're
Speaker 1: talking about. Jared has prepared a couple of questions. I
Speaker 1: guess we both kind of have, right, Jared, you want
Speaker 1: to start off and well, of course, well, my like
Speaker 1: tell us a little bit about rewarding relationships. UM, and you,
Speaker 1: being the chief Dating Officer, I think a lot of
Speaker 1: people are wondering, what does that exactly mean? Great question?
Speaker 1: I help people remove the desperation and frustration from dating,
Speaker 1: love and relationship. Does he like me? Does he not
Speaker 1: like me? Is she into me? What do I text?
Speaker 1: What do I wear? How do I put my online
Speaker 1: profile up? Do I expect the phone call? All? Do
Speaker 1: I let him me up on the first date? All
Speaker 1: the different types of questions that people really don't have
Speaker 1: anybody to hold her hand through. So I provide all
Speaker 1: the different services for that. You can text me while
Speaker 1: you're on a date. There's a fee for that because
Speaker 1: people in the beginning, we're texting me seven and I
Speaker 1: was so I couldn't sleep, So I added a fee protecting.
Speaker 1: And it's been amazing because you go on a date
Speaker 1: and I'm like the hitch but you know, I don't
Speaker 1: know if you ever saw that movie with of course? Yeah.
Speaker 1: So I provide the same service, and I tell you
Speaker 1: what to say, definitely what not to say, because people
Speaker 1: just show up on dates completely clueless, and I helped
Speaker 1: them flue in and I've helped so many people get
Speaker 1: married and it's really wonderful. I love what I do.
Speaker 1: That's amazing. So would you see it? So your website
Speaker 1: is rewarding relationships dot com. So we you suggest people
Speaker 1: go and join. Is it okay if I call it
Speaker 1: a program? Was that how you sure? Um? So, would
Speaker 1: you suggest people joining the program before or after uh,
Speaker 1: they start going into the dating world? What do you
Speaker 1: think he's better for them? Right away? You should join
Speaker 1: because A you need to make sure that you're confident,
Speaker 1: feeling good, and that you're going on the right websites
Speaker 1: or apps. People just abuse the apps. Everyone's just in
Speaker 1: the swipe happy culture and they don't know how to
Speaker 1: pick a suitable mate. Whereas with both of you, what
Speaker 1: I love about both of you guys, is that you're
Speaker 1: very mature and you just listening to you. You know,
Speaker 1: you are in your relationships, you protect your women, which
Speaker 1: I love. Maybe in your personalize you're not mature, but
Speaker 1: I don't know. I think you're adorable. I mean, I
Speaker 1: still think farts and pooping are very funny. So I
Speaker 1: don't know how mature. Yeah, that's never going to change.
Speaker 1: I have a question for you. So you said you
Speaker 1: said that you help people clue in on dates and
Speaker 1: and help them not show up clueless. What in your
Speaker 1: experience would you say is showing up clueless? Because I'm
Speaker 1: just trying to think um, you know, I I fully
Speaker 1: agree that it's it's good to you know, instill some
Speaker 1: confidence in people in the whole dating world. There's a
Speaker 1: lot of different things that they learn how to navigate.
Speaker 1: But I just kind of want to like like zone
Speaker 1: in on cluelessness and dating and just kind of uncover
Speaker 1: what that might be. Sure, so people forget that you're
Speaker 1: dating and it's romantic and you're supposed to show up
Speaker 1: as your best self, and people show up thinking datings
Speaker 1: like therapy and um, you know, you can go out
Speaker 1: with somebody that is divorced for an older category and
Speaker 1: they might cry on a date, they might talk about
Speaker 1: their ex wife, they might talk about their pre nups
Speaker 1: all but in the first five minutes, it's like, what
Speaker 1: just happened. I don't know if I like your voice yet.
Speaker 1: I don't even know if I like what you're wearing,
Speaker 1: or if I want to spend another fifteen minutes here
Speaker 1: with you and you're already on prenups like no, no, no, no,
Speaker 1: you know, just running out the door, or for girls
Speaker 1: that show up and they're like steps. My therapy said
Speaker 1: that I really need to work on being more outgoing,
Speaker 1: and like I got a flat tire, and then my
Speaker 1: sister said blah blah blah, and then they just keep
Speaker 1: talking about them, like my last heartbreak was so devastating.
Speaker 1: I really hope you're not going to be a die
Speaker 1: like that and that's not your best self and that's
Speaker 1: definitely not how you want to present on a date
Speaker 1: or any type of relationship. Yeah. I I it's funny
Speaker 1: because we talked about dating pet peeves a lot on
Speaker 1: this podcast, and one of them that I've mentioned multiple
Speaker 1: times is when you know, back when Jared and I
Speaker 1: were going on first dates all those years ago, it
Speaker 1: was always one of my biggest pet peeves was hearing
Speaker 1: someone I'm on a date with talk about other guys
Speaker 1: that they've dated or not. Maybe it's not like a
Speaker 1: pet peeve, but it's just like it's a bit of
Speaker 1: a turn off, I would say. Um, And so I
Speaker 1: definitely think there's like a coaching aspect that could come
Speaker 1: in where like just don't talk about your ex boyfriends,
Speaker 1: at least not right out of the gate, you know,
Speaker 1: like not on the first date. Um. It's it's funny
Speaker 1: also kind of tangential here. But I had this weird
Speaker 1: like thought yesterday. I was like taking Papi out to
Speaker 1: go for a walk, so you could go to the bathroom,
Speaker 1: and like you said, um, sorry, excuse me. Um, going
Speaker 1: on first dates with people is like kind of you know,
Speaker 1: putting on your best face and putting your best foot forward.
Speaker 1: And I was like, well, I kind of took the
Speaker 1: opposite approach. And when I first David kayl and I
Speaker 1: like put my worst foot forward, and I was like,
Speaker 1: this is the worst of what you're gonna get from me,
Speaker 1: because I kind of dealt with some insecurities too back
Speaker 1: when I used to go on dates, and so I
Speaker 1: was like, I'm just gonna show my not like the
Speaker 1: worst side of myself, but like a you know, a
Speaker 1: very watered down, like lesser version of myself. And then
Speaker 1: that was accepted wholeheartedly. And then so I was like, Okay, cool,
Speaker 1: now I can kind of like continue to move on
Speaker 1: with that. Um. So it's funny to hear you say
Speaker 1: that when you know everyone's different. Obviously different things work
Speaker 1: for different people, but um, like kind of almost like
Speaker 1: the inverse of that worked worked better for me in
Speaker 1: a weird, in a weird sort of opposite Wednesday kind
Speaker 1: of a way, you know. But that's because you have
Speaker 1: a girl that loves you, and you're both of you
Speaker 1: are young, and you have a girl that truly fell
Speaker 1: in love with you and was willing to be with
Speaker 1: you in any parameter or any dynamic, and she has
Speaker 1: a lot of confidence to do that. She knew that
Speaker 1: her love for you was greater, um than anything else,
Speaker 1: and she was willing to wait around for you to
Speaker 1: see if you had the same feelings for her. And
Speaker 1: this is a girl you should marry. I'm just saying
Speaker 1: after having seen it play it out and everything like that,
Speaker 1: and given your age and now that's already and congratulations
Speaker 1: on your new home. Thank you an awesome girl. Well,
Speaker 1: I'm going to have amazing girls. I I definitely agree
Speaker 1: with that last statement, especially, and you're right, I I
Speaker 1: do agree that it was kind of one of those
Speaker 1: things where I was thinking about how that then snowballed
Speaker 1: into like me just being a more confident person too. Uh,
Speaker 1: and how I think up until this relationship, I've always
Speaker 1: kind of missed out on, like receiving love from other people. Uh.
Speaker 1: It's still something I work on, but it definitely, like
Speaker 1: you said, it's definitely because of that that kind of
Speaker 1: has made it work, uh fortunately for me. Otherwise you
Speaker 1: know who knows where it would be. But but yeah, no,
Speaker 1: I agree, Like like I said, it was just it's
Speaker 1: just interesting to hear uh here kind of the ideal
Speaker 1: way of going about it and then um the weird
Speaker 1: way that obviously Jared and I both kind of fumbled
Speaker 1: into our relationships. But um I I do, I do
Speaker 1: agree with what you're saying. There is like definitely like
Speaker 1: a best practice for going on these days. So so
Speaker 1: like what else could we expect, you know, like what
Speaker 1: other kind of maybe like tips or tricks would you have,
Speaker 1: especially for like today's dating, because it's changing with COVID
Speaker 1: and you know, dating apps have always been a thing,
Speaker 1: but now like dates can't really happen quite as frequently.
Speaker 1: So what kind of advice would you have for like
Speaker 1: the or if you're in a state that is open,
Speaker 1: you know, anything outside of l A County right now
Speaker 1: that you can go to a restaurant and stay outside
Speaker 1: and there aren't any issues, wear your mask and try
Speaker 1: and get an in person date. I don't know if
Speaker 1: that's controversial or not, but you still want to meet
Speaker 1: face to face. It's always better to beat by r
Speaker 1: L than like on the phone or on FaceTime. If
Speaker 1: you're uncomfortable, it's no problem. Say hey, let's just talk
Speaker 1: on the phone and then maybe we can do a
Speaker 1: virtual date. But don't stay on the phone for ten hours.
Speaker 1: Don't be in lingerie, you know, don't be like laying
Speaker 1: on the bed high How are you so? Tell me
Speaker 1: everything about you. The guy might be fascinated with you
Speaker 1: and into you for those like ten minute windows, but
Speaker 1: after that the guy is gonna be like bored. That
Speaker 1: was easy, she was easy. Next, who's the next girl
Speaker 1: I can get? If I can get that one? You know, like,
Speaker 1: girls don't seem to understand how the guy's brain works,
Speaker 1: and um, same with guys. They don't always understand how
Speaker 1: the women's brain works. But girls really really need on education.
Speaker 1: Sorry girls, That's why I exist on how to talk
Speaker 1: to a guy and um, how not to be always
Speaker 1: so available. So those are things that I would say,
Speaker 1: don't be don't let it linger on for hours and
Speaker 1: hours and it first have some confidence, you know, put
Speaker 1: your clothes on. You're not going to go to Starbucks naked.
Speaker 1: You're not going to go on a zoom date naked.
Speaker 1: And don't do it in your bedroom. If you're doing
Speaker 1: a virtual date, it's not a great idea. I work
Speaker 1: for you. I'm confused. You're not talking about like first
Speaker 1: date naked zoom calls R. Yes, I am. So you're
Speaker 1: are you saying there's people out there that are are
Speaker 1: getting naked on zoom calls, like on first dates? So
Speaker 1: like this is like having sex on the first day.
Speaker 1: Is this what we're relating it to? Oh that's enough,
Speaker 1: that's another day. Virtual sex is another day. But yes,
Speaker 1: that's what you're equating it to. Girls or people that
Speaker 1: are desperate and they haven't seen anybody in months, especially
Speaker 1: during the you know, the bulk of the quarantine, and
Speaker 1: they were you know, guy's horney, girls horney, and people
Speaker 1: started taking off their clothes and I would be yelling
Speaker 1: at my clients when what did wrong with you? Put
Speaker 1: your clothes back on? What do you mean? We're wearing
Speaker 1: this strap was top and you were talking about like
Speaker 1: what kind of lace path and you're wearing under them
Speaker 1: like you don't know this guy? Zip it back up.
Speaker 1: They just there're people are so starved for attention and
Speaker 1: so desperate and they want a guy or girls so
Speaker 1: badly that they get into bad habits and you cannot
Speaker 1: have bad habits. So while we're on the topic of it,
Speaker 1: then let's say once COVID starts to like fizzle out,
Speaker 1: COVID aside. You know, like, how is an appropriate amount
Speaker 1: of time to like move to a physical stage with
Speaker 1: a perspective partner? You think, and just like a general thumb,
Speaker 1: I wouldn't go home hooking up with someone on the
Speaker 1: first date truthfully, you know, you want to be a
Speaker 1: respectable guy and you want the girl to have some
Speaker 1: boundaries and self respect. You want to have something to
Speaker 1: work for, So maybe a kiss on the first date,
Speaker 1: um would be good. And then if you also think,
Speaker 1: I think anticipation is highly underrated. There's something about the
Speaker 1: anticipation of not knowing and then having it built up.
Speaker 1: It's it's exciting, the most exciting. It's like bungee jumping.
Speaker 1: You don't know what's going to happen, and the same
Speaker 1: thing can happen with your heart, um in a good way.
Speaker 1: You want that mystery and that excitement, and people just
Speaker 1: think that they have to come bearing all like um sensitive,
Speaker 1: I'm emotional, annoying, like wearing every sign I'm desperate, and
Speaker 1: they don't realize that they're showing up with those signs.
Speaker 1: So I think the mystery and the anticipation is of
Speaker 1: a sexy things. Yeah, I guess like Jared's it's well,
Speaker 1: like I said, but it is tantalizing, you know, the
Speaker 1: anticipation it builds you start to wonder what's going on,
Speaker 1: and then it starts happening and your heart starts to flutter. Well,
Speaker 1: So on the flip side of it, then I would
Speaker 1: say this year, more than any year, a lot of
Speaker 1: people are going into the New Year's single and discouraged
Speaker 1: and unhappy with their relationships. So what kind of advice
Speaker 1: would you have for for those people? You know, maybe
Speaker 1: the ones that UH want to be in a relationship
Speaker 1: but necessarily don't have the opportunities you right now? What
Speaker 1: kind of advice would you have for the singles? For
Speaker 1: the single people, there is a lid for every cover,
Speaker 1: there's a lid for every pot. There's someone for everyone
Speaker 1: that matches that person's style. You just got to do
Speaker 1: the work you want to lose weight. It's not gonna
Speaker 1: happen when you wake up in the morning. You have
Speaker 1: to work out, eat well, go to the gym, et cetera. Um,
Speaker 1: minimize whatever you know, change your eating habits. You want
Speaker 1: to get a boyfriend or a girlfriend, or have a
Speaker 1: long term relationship, you have to put in the effort
Speaker 1: as well. You have to believe it, want it. Get
Speaker 1: on the apps. Don't just do apps where it's just
Speaker 1: type culture. Go on on the actual website that you like.
Speaker 1: Get on three of them. Put up a great profile,
Speaker 1: three different photos. Do not put the longest paragraphs. Ever,
Speaker 1: no one really reads them. No one really cares about
Speaker 1: the detail. They either like your photo or they don't.
Speaker 1: They either want to ask you or not. Like you
Speaker 1: don't want to put what happens to in third grade?
Speaker 1: It's just no one cares, honestly. It's what are you
Speaker 1: doing right now? Where do you into these days? Three sentences?
Speaker 1: Be done and be more open minded. That's my best
Speaker 1: advice because, um, if you're if you're home right now
Speaker 1: and you're not going out and meeting people, get on singles,
Speaker 1: zoom dates or digital dates and go out walking. Get
Speaker 1: a pet. If you don't have a pet, just go
Speaker 1: to a dog park. Go where people are, a coffee shop, UM,
Speaker 1: a campus and walk around. The more ambular you are,
Speaker 1: the more people you're gonna meet and say that you
Speaker 1: want to meet people. If you have a mindset I'm
Speaker 1: never going to meet anyone. I'm never going to meet anyone.
Speaker 1: You're never gonna meet anyone. But if you're like I
Speaker 1: hope to meet someone, it's gonna happen one day. Do
Speaker 1: you have a like, a favorite or like a preferred
Speaker 1: app that you recommend to people? Um, they're so personal.
Speaker 1: There's so many. By the way, there's I'm sure you
Speaker 1: guys know about them too, but there's Match and Hinge
Speaker 1: and Christian Mingles, j Jade, Jewish, plenty of Fish exactly,
Speaker 1: Farmers only. There's a bazillion apps out there, So pick
Speaker 1: the one that you like. Um, and I would try
Speaker 1: three different ones and see what's out there. There's bumble bumble.
Speaker 1: The woman has to pursue the man. I really think
Speaker 1: that the man has to pursue the woman. In general,
Speaker 1: I think a guy should be the pursuer. It's that's
Speaker 1: like the guy's job is to pick you. The guy
Speaker 1: picks you, and the girl picks from the guys that
Speaker 1: are from the pool of pickers. So like, girls come
Speaker 1: to me and they're like, why does any like me?
Speaker 1: And I'm like you're not as type, and they hate
Speaker 1: when I say it. I'm like, you're just not as type.
Speaker 1: It's not your voice, or your look, or your hair
Speaker 1: or your size, whatever it is, You're just men have
Speaker 1: a type. And you know, women fall in love behind
Speaker 1: the ears, and men fall in love visually right off
Speaker 1: the bath, like the first five seconds, and then after
Speaker 1: that the relationship grows and you get to know the person.
Speaker 1: But right off the bat, a guy can tell if
Speaker 1: it's their look, if you want to pursue the person
Speaker 1: or not. You guys, men are faster than us, and
Speaker 1: girls are a little bit more open minded, like maybe
Speaker 1: I'll give the guy a chance, maybe not, and especially
Speaker 1: if you say the right thing. So for girls, I
Speaker 1: would say, work on your confidence and get on some
Speaker 1: apps and be open minded. Just don't tell your whole
Speaker 1: life story. Like you want to put your money in
Speaker 1: a bad day, you know, you want to invest in
Speaker 1: a bank that's going down, Same with your love life.
Speaker 1: Don't invest in bad people. That's my best advice that
Speaker 1: I could say to people. Invest in yourself first. Well,
Speaker 1: I think that's great advice. I think everybody should be
Speaker 1: taking that to heart, especially sock Army Um. Well, Maya,
Speaker 1: thank you so much for joining us. We really appreciate it.
Speaker 1: Everybody listening out there, please go to Rewarding Relationships dot
Speaker 1: com to get more information about how you can join
Speaker 1: the program and help yourself in the dating world, which
Speaker 1: is something that we all need, especially if you're listening
Speaker 1: to a podcast called help My Second Dating. Uh, Maya,
Speaker 1: Where else can people find you Instagram, at rewarding Relationships
Speaker 1: or at Maya as RODDI fame with Facebook and my website.
Speaker 1: Rewarding Relationships dot Com has all the links of where
Speaker 1: to find me. And I'm so excited, so happy to
Speaker 1: be here. Guys, you're amazing. Oh my, you're the best.
Speaker 1: Thank you so much for joining us. We'll be sure
Speaker 1: to check you out and you have to come back
Speaker 1: on I would love to thank you. Hey, welcome back
Speaker 1: to help I suck a dating. We are fast forwarding
Speaker 1: in time right now, myself, Dean, and Katie all here.
Speaker 1: We have a dating horror story to get into. We
Speaker 1: also have an email, a dating term, and I wrote
Speaker 1: a little jingle bells song just for Dean himself. But
Speaker 1: first I want to talk about a quick story that
Speaker 1: was just announced this week. Halle Berry obviously the famous actress.
Speaker 1: She's fifty four, she's single, and apparently she is not
Speaker 1: ready to ming with any of her friends X. The
Speaker 1: headline is halle Berry reveals why she would never date
Speaker 1: a friend's ex quote it's a cardinal sin. So apparently,
Speaker 1: she says that she would never ever enter a relationship
Speaker 1: or even go on a date with her friends with
Speaker 1: her friends past significant other, going so far to say
Speaker 1: that even if her friend went on like two dates
Speaker 1: with this person, halle Berry did not change her opinion.
Speaker 1: She said, if my friends only been out with him
Speaker 1: like twice, he's still not on my list. That's how
Speaker 1: I feel. I'm that kind of girl. So my question
Speaker 1: to you, Dean and Katie, would you ever date a
Speaker 1: friend's X? No? Uh, well, let's ask ourselves this question. Jared,
Speaker 1: are you friends with Chris Souls? You know what, I almost, dude,
Speaker 1: I almost said that. You took the words right out
Speaker 1: of my mouth I was gonna say in the Bachelor world,
Speaker 1: it's kind of hard to ignore because I'm friends with
Speaker 1: Chris Souls and we're friends with Caitlin. I understand that,
Speaker 1: but oh, because Ashley's friends with Caitlin, and then you're dating. Actually,
Speaker 1: that makes sense. That makes sense. I mean, listen, I
Speaker 1: think I talked about this on the podcast before. I
Speaker 1: don't personally feel the same way halle Berry does, which
Speaker 1: I don't think I would ever have thought I would
Speaker 1: ever say that sentence my entire life. But I guess
Speaker 1: I guess Hallie and I disagree on this topic because, Uh,
Speaker 1: I personally dated friends X in the past. Obviously not
Speaker 1: not the case anymore. But I don't think it's like
Speaker 1: a bit. I don't think it should just be a
Speaker 1: complete barrier of entry for someone to date someone just
Speaker 1: because their friend dated. Then what are you talking about
Speaker 1: a bachelor like in your own previous experience? Was it
Speaker 1: bachelor related or no? Not bachelorrated related? Absolutely not. That's
Speaker 1: what I mean. That's why I kind of want to
Speaker 1: hear Dean's experience. Be like, so, Dean, what happened? What
Speaker 1: what do you mean? Tell me what you said that
Speaker 1: you had an experience of dating of friends X. How
Speaker 1: close was this friend? Yeah? This is I did I
Speaker 1: know when he was my best friend? He was my
Speaker 1: best friends? Uh? And I guess when I say it
Speaker 1: was his ex it wasn't. They weren't ex as they
Speaker 1: had just um they had they had hooked up before, right,
Speaker 1: so it wasn't like a full blown X of his.
Speaker 1: But by halle Berry standards, it sounds like she absolutely wash.
Speaker 1: And I think I've talked about on the podcast before.
Speaker 1: It did become a bit of a thorn in the
Speaker 1: side of our friendship for a little bit until we
Speaker 1: discussed it. But as best friends do, they get over
Speaker 1: things and they settle their differences. I just took a
Speaker 1: little bit of time to figure that out, and and
Speaker 1: if I could go back in time, I think the
Speaker 1: biggest mistake that I made was I just wasn't honest
Speaker 1: about it with him from the get go. But I personally,
Speaker 1: I personally didn't think that it was it even warranted
Speaker 1: having a conversation because they were never, you know, seriously
Speaker 1: in a relationship or anything like that. But um, well,
Speaker 1: low and behold, I was wrong on that front, and
Speaker 1: I should have had the conversation. So that's my That's
Speaker 1: my one bit of advice. If you do want to
Speaker 1: go date is one of your friends ex is, make
Speaker 1: sure to confront the friend about it first. Uh, maybe
Speaker 1: not even get their blessing. That would be great if
Speaker 1: you could get their blessing, but just make sure that
Speaker 1: there in the know of what's going on. What happens
Speaker 1: if you don't get their blessing. Uh, if you don't
Speaker 1: get their blessing. It just really depends what you value
Speaker 1: more than friendship or this potential relationship. I personally think
Speaker 1: if they were true friends, they would say, do whatever
Speaker 1: you want to do to make you happy. But you know,
Speaker 1: I'm sure that's not the case every single time. So
Speaker 1: what do you think, Katie. I think it's difficult to
Speaker 1: really answer that because every situation is totally different, like X,
Speaker 1: as in I've dated that person for a year and
Speaker 1: we loved each other or you know what I'm saying, okay,
Speaker 1: and all weren't different conversations. I guess my initially answer
Speaker 1: was no, absolutely not. But I think I was thinking
Speaker 1: X is in serious X And even then speaking of
Speaker 1: love actually, Jared, because speaking of love actually the guy
Speaker 1: was like his best friend was in love with his wife,
Speaker 1: and so you can't really write it off completely. The
Speaker 1: conversation has to be had. Well. In that movie, that's
Speaker 1: the that's the famous scene with the cards where he's
Speaker 1: he's standing in at our front door. SNL just did
Speaker 1: a parody of it great scene. I do agree that
Speaker 1: there isn't just one blanket situation that you can just
Speaker 1: address it all with one thing. Uh. And I also
Speaker 1: agree like the severity of the relationship. For instance, my
Speaker 1: situation was different just because they weren't you know, married obviously,
Speaker 1: so that definitely helps. Uh. If I think about if
Speaker 1: I think back to my previous serious relationships and then
Speaker 1: like if one of my friends came to me and
Speaker 1: they were like, hey, I'm thinking about dating this person. Uh,
Speaker 1: I guess you're right. It depends on a lot of
Speaker 1: different factors. Well, Dean, here's a question for you, because
Speaker 1: you talked about your own experience with this and then
Speaker 1: you said it caused a thorn in your friendship, and
Speaker 1: then you keep saying you were best friends. So my
Speaker 1: question is do you think that you dating his ex
Speaker 1: like had anything to do with you guys maybe not
Speaker 1: being as close today as you once were. I absolutely not. No,
Speaker 1: he just moved. He just moved to Colorado and we're
Speaker 1: still best friends. Don't get me wrong. It's just you know,
Speaker 1: we can't. We lived together for a long time too,
Speaker 1: so that wasn't the reason. Uh. And we, like I said,
Speaker 1: we're still best friends, Mike, if you're listening to this,
Speaker 1: we're still absolutely with friends. I love you to death.
Speaker 1: I would have a kill for you. I love Yeah,
Speaker 1: I love you, Mike, but yeah I agree if I
Speaker 1: don't know. And then I was trying to think back
Speaker 1: to like bachelor specifics. Uh So, like let's say, for instance,
Speaker 1: you know, Christine and I dated for a little bit too.
Speaker 1: Nick and I are friends. Christina dated Nick on the show. Uh,
Speaker 1: And I would never say that caused any type of
Speaker 1: rifts between any of us, but it was just it
Speaker 1: was weird. It was weird to hear like Nick talk
Speaker 1: about Christina and vice versa. Um, whether they were saying
Speaker 1: good or bad things, they're relevant. Just the fact that
Speaker 1: they were, you know, kind of having those conversations was
Speaker 1: still just weird, I suppose. So it definitely makes things
Speaker 1: more complicated than they need to be. So maybe for
Speaker 1: your un stick of sanity, just stay away from your friends. Exis. Yeah,
Speaker 1: there's a ton of people out here, So that's what
Speaker 1: so many people, Yeah, they say, there's too many freaking Okay, kay,
Speaker 1: let's ask you this. Let's say turns out Hannah Gee
Speaker 1: had a relationship with this James guy a long time ago.
Speaker 1: Would that influence your your decision any sort of way
Speaker 1: one way or the other. Um, I would be like
Speaker 1: it would influence me in the sense that I would
Speaker 1: be asking her questions like what's wrong with them or
Speaker 1: what happened? But I think if they weren't together when
Speaker 1: I met or when I met him, then no. Again,
Speaker 1: Like you said, Katie, it's so hard because each situation
Speaker 1: is different, like the intensive the relationship. If somebody I
Speaker 1: dated for me personally, somebody that I went on a
Speaker 1: date with a couple of times, if one of my
Speaker 1: friends wanted to date them, I'm all for it. Now
Speaker 1: if it was like my ex girlfriend of two years,
Speaker 1: we're gonna have a different conversation. It all depends on
Speaker 1: the the intensity of the relationship. I totally agree with you, guys.
Speaker 1: So let's move on. Let's get to our dating horror story,
Speaker 1: which is something that we started last week and it's
Speaker 1: become a weekly segment. And you know, Eastern, I gotta
Speaker 1: say Eastern. Between the dating horror stories and the dating terms,
Speaker 1: we gotta come up with like a song, a jingle,
Speaker 1: some sort of sound effect where we can introduce these things.
Speaker 1: Just putting it out there. You know. Uh, Mark, if
Speaker 1: you're listening, because you have the greatest voice of us all,
Speaker 1: would you mind reading the sucky dating story that one
Speaker 1: of our wonderful stuck army listeners sent into us. Yes,
Speaker 1: indeed it's from anonymous, which makes it even juicier. I
Speaker 1: was listening to your latest podcast episode that mentioned the
Speaker 1: dating story of the guy swing the girl's hair and
Speaker 1: telling her that her scent was still in his nostrils. Well,
Speaker 1: I will said, A guy asked me what my blood
Speaker 1: type was. What I said, I didn't know, and we
Speaker 1: changed the subject. He brought it up again, said I
Speaker 1: don't know. He said, do you think your parents would know?
Speaker 1: Need Less to say, I'm lucky to still be alive
Speaker 1: and singing after that weird ash to date the end,
Speaker 1: that is very very strange, not only that he brought
Speaker 1: up the first time, but the fact that he asked
Speaker 1: if her parents would he really Maybe you want to
Speaker 1: make wonder maybe you went on a date with a vampire.
Speaker 1: Maybe he wanted to suck your blood and he likes
Speaker 1: a certain type of blood. You know, like, what is
Speaker 1: it like? Oh negative? I don't even know blood types?
Speaker 1: What if she was like, I have a stomach ache
Speaker 1: and he needs, like, well, certain types or certain diets,
Speaker 1: because that was the whole thing. I'd like to think
Speaker 1: that she went on a date with a vampire. I
Speaker 1: think it's probably a better story. Jared. I always it
Speaker 1: too realistic. This guy is looking out for her well being. No,
Speaker 1: maybe it's like, maybe it's her breeding purposes. Like maybe
Speaker 1: this guy was I just googled it. A BE negative
Speaker 1: is the most rare type of blood at point six
Speaker 1: percent of people that have it. Maybe he's a BE negative.
Speaker 1: He wants to breed with another a BE negative person,
Speaker 1: and he's trying to nip it in the bud and
Speaker 1: figure out exactly whether or not this person is, you know,
Speaker 1: breeding material in his eyes. Nonetheless, he should say, by
Speaker 1: the way, you give the reason because of this, Yeah,
Speaker 1: or maybe he was wanting her to say her so
Speaker 1: he could flex with his Oh yeah, nothing like flexing
Speaker 1: your blood type on a day to really just establish
Speaker 1: your dominance. Yeah maybe negative baby, Yeah, oh you're be positive? Yeah,
Speaker 1: and a half percent people are be positive. I'm may
Speaker 1: be negative. So whatever. This guy should go on one
Speaker 1: of those speed dating things and then every person that
Speaker 1: comes up he just asked their blood type. And then
Speaker 1: once he gets to the most rare, the A B
Speaker 1: what was it? What was it? A B? What may
Speaker 1: be negative? A be negative? That's the winner right there.
Speaker 1: Maybe that's what he's just looking for. So what he
Speaker 1: needs to do is go on the speed dating and
Speaker 1: as soon as he finds is A be negative, just
Speaker 1: proposed right then and there, and then he'll obviously probably
Speaker 1: just you know, a locker in the basement, because that's
Speaker 1: what it sounds. Beautiful. Genius, Jared, what type of dating
Speaker 1: term do you have for us this week? Oh? Well,
Speaker 1: you know it's it's the holidays, everybody, and uh, you know,
Speaker 1: it can be a stressful time. It could be an
Speaker 1: exciting time. This year is obviously a little bit different.
Speaker 1: Who knows, but I figured I'd go with a festive
Speaker 1: dating term. So, Katie, I don't know if you remember
Speaker 1: or not. Each week I present a new dating term
Speaker 1: to the podcast, to which Dean Mark Easton all give
Speaker 1: their guesses as to what the hell could possibly mean.
Speaker 1: So today I'm gonna ask what you think the dating
Speaker 1: term scrooging is. Now, you guys all know the the
Speaker 1: Disney tail. I guess it's not a Disney tail, but
Speaker 1: just the story of Eberneezer Scrooge and how he hated
Speaker 1: Christmas and all the holiday season. So today our dating
Speaker 1: term is, of course scrooging. What do you think scrooging
Speaker 1: could mean in the dating world? Incredible, Just an incredible term.
Speaker 1: But I can't wait to pick out what it really means. Ah, yes,
Speaker 1: Ebnez are a scrooge ba humbug. Yes, I'm gonna say.
Speaker 1: Scrooging is when, man, this is this is a tough one.
Speaker 1: Scrooging has to be something along the lines of, well,
Speaker 1: I don't know, actually, because it can't just be they
Speaker 1: just get you know, cranky around Christmas time, because that's
Speaker 1: not really dating centric. It's got to be something along
Speaker 1: the lines of maybe, oh, oh, I'm sorry, I have
Speaker 1: I think I noted. Is Scrooging someone is when you
Speaker 1: are too scared to break up with them, and so
Speaker 1: you start acting like a like a piece of crap,
Speaker 1: like a jerk and sad and depressed and and all
Speaker 1: the time, so that way they break up with you.
Speaker 1: So you're scrooging them by giving them a reason to
Speaker 1: break up with the essentially, so you start channeling your
Speaker 1: Ebenezer Scrooge to get out of the relationship. Okay, I
Speaker 1: like that a lot. Yeah, yeah. I think someone who
Speaker 1: scrooges is someone who around Halloween cool things off dramatically,
Speaker 1: even maybe breaking it up because they want to avoid
Speaker 1: family time at Christmas, getting you a present, all that crap.
Speaker 1: But in January they were like, hey, what's up, and
Speaker 1: all of a sudden things are good again. I think
Speaker 1: a scrooge avoids the holiday completely, that that is such
Speaker 1: a scrooge thing to do the opposite season. Um, I
Speaker 1: was thinking scrooging just my ghosting, but um, I think
Speaker 1: that I'm wrong. There are three ghosts in the story,
Speaker 1: so maybe yeah, Jared Jared Layd, honest man, what what
Speaker 1: what is it? All right? Well we want to know,
Speaker 1: all right, well scrooging, I mean Mark, you were pretty
Speaker 1: on fire here. Well. Scrooging, of course, is when you
Speaker 1: decide to stop talking to someone right before the festivities
Speaker 1: and the holiday season begins because you want to avoid
Speaker 1: buying them a gift. There is scourging. Ladies and gentlemen,
Speaker 1: don't be a scrooge, Okay, don't end a relationship just
Speaker 1: because you don't want to buy them a gift. Can
Speaker 1: I can I contribute a dating one? Of course? You please? Well,
Speaker 1: I'm going to contribute in English dating phrase. Or can
Speaker 1: you guys tell me what is um? Oh, there's a couple.
Speaker 1: What would you call a rocket? Rocket? A redheaded last
Speaker 1: that's just just ten out of ten? Oh, that's a rocket,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna say, because when I think of a rocket,
Speaker 1: I obviously think of the male reproductive area, a dog's
Speaker 1: penis uret obviously. Uh, And so I'm gonna say a
Speaker 1: rocket is when uh, you, as a male, unexpectedly that
Speaker 1: part of your body awakens and you're like, what is
Speaker 1: going Nothing is happening. It's just it's just there. It's
Speaker 1: like a rocket and it's it's taken off and I
Speaker 1: have no control over it. I think that's an amazing guess.
Speaker 1: But a rocket is a hot Chickah, it's just any
Speaker 1: hot chick, not just a redhead. Yeah, it's not just
Speaker 1: a red head a rocket, or or you can say,
Speaker 1: my bird, maybe a red rocket could be like a
Speaker 1: really hot redheaded English girl. Yeah, sure that makes sense.
Speaker 1: What else you got for us? Well here's the thing,
Speaker 1: so Dean, before we go, First of all, this is
Speaker 1: Christmas Week. This is coming out the Monday before Christmas.
Speaker 1: So to everybody listening out there to suck army, Uh,
Speaker 1: Merry Christmas, Happy holidays. Uh, you know, we just hope
Speaker 1: that you have a great, great holiday season. And Dean,
Speaker 1: we posted that compilation video of of us singing jingle bells,
Speaker 1: to which I made a small caption which I don't
Speaker 1: think you were a big fan of because you said
Speaker 1: it didn't rhyme. But if you say it properly, it
Speaker 1: rhymes a little bit. So well, here's the thing. So
Speaker 1: I wrote that as an Instagram caption, and then I
Speaker 1: was inspired to write a little help I suck at
Speaker 1: dating jingle bells, little jingle Uh. I don't know how
Speaker 1: to phrase that, so here we go. So, because this
Speaker 1: is what my life has come down to, here we go.
Speaker 1: It's help by suck at dating. Jingle bells. Jingle Uh.
Speaker 1: I wish I had music, but you know what copyright,
Speaker 1: So here we go. It starts off jingle bells. Jared smells.
Speaker 1: Dean is always late. Oh what fun it is to
Speaker 1: host the podcast on dating. Hey, We're help by suck
Speaker 1: get dating on I Heart Radio. We're there for you
Speaker 1: when your ex boyfriends starts dating o ho. We tell
Speaker 1: our dating horror stories, we call out people's bull will
Speaker 1: laugh in cry together because it's the holidays. In your single, Hey,
Speaker 1: jingle bells, jarred smells. Dean is always late? Oh what
Speaker 1: fun it is to host a podcast on dateing. Yeah, thanks, guys,
Speaker 1: I'm actually sweating. You know. That was good. That was good.
Speaker 1: My only bit of feedback is, I don't understand why
Speaker 1: everyone is always has to point out the fact that
Speaker 1: I'm sometimes late. I was late today. It's it's the
Speaker 1: low hanging fruit, I said. I spell yeah, but we
Speaker 1: all know you don't smell. I was late one time,
Speaker 1: and now all of a sudden, no one is dropping
Speaker 1: one time. I've made like, I've made a song about it.
Speaker 1: I've made uh like four Instagram videos about you being late.
Speaker 1: I've really capitalized off that one time that you were
Speaker 1: like a half hour late. Yeah, I'm sure it's I'm
Speaker 1: sure if we brought any one of my friends or
Speaker 1: even Kayla on the podcast, they probably said the same thing.
Speaker 1: But that doesn't matter because one is right around the corner.
Speaker 1: Jared before we go and Katie. Actually, I've got questions
Speaker 1: for both of you, guys. Since Christmas is this week,
Speaker 1: what do you guys have planned for your partners? What
Speaker 1: ladies first? What kind of gifts do you have? Well,
Speaker 1: he's not gonna listen to this podcast, sou I. He
Speaker 1: actually carries around a backpack that he's had since two
Speaker 1: thousand twelve that he brings to football every day. So, um,
Speaker 1: I just I was like, Oh, I like your backpack,
Speaker 1: he said, I don't. I hate it. It's not even me.
Speaker 1: It has studs on it and it's weird. And I
Speaker 1: was like, wow, he literally wears it every day. I
Speaker 1: was like, how long have you had it? He said
Speaker 1: since two thousand twelve. And so I got him a
Speaker 1: really nice new backpack. Oh that's awesome. It's very thoughtful
Speaker 1: that I know he likes. So that's that's gonna That's
Speaker 1: a great kid. I won't say when I'm getting ash
Speaker 1: because I'm sure somebody could easily just message her and
Speaker 1: tell her I got her mostly like funny gifts because
Speaker 1: she's very hard to shop four where I'm very easy.
Speaker 1: Mark and I talked about this, like, get me at
Speaker 1: the new Patriots sweatshirt. I know I have seven of them,
Speaker 1: but I will wear like I will wear any Boston
Speaker 1: sports clothing you will give me with her, It's very
Speaker 1: different because I'm not gonna buy her beauty stuff. I
Speaker 1: don't know what the hell to get her. I'm not
Speaker 1: gonna get her like clothing because I don't know what
Speaker 1: the hell to get her. Uh and uh, so I'm
Speaker 1: getting her like an assortment of different things, uh, thoughtful
Speaker 1: and nature, funny and others, and then hopefully she'll enjoy them. Yeah. Well,
Speaker 1: great for the very specific description of what you're getting,
Speaker 1: You don't You don't want to spoil the surprise. I
Speaker 1: get that. Maybe next week we'll be able to check
Speaker 1: back in and see how they all went over and
Speaker 1: maybe get up. Can you give us a more thorough explanation?
Speaker 1: Can you give us a glimpse of what you might
Speaker 1: be getting, Caitlin, I'm sure she's sitting next to you,
Speaker 1: so you can't say any details. That's very true. I
Speaker 1: can't and I won't, and a big part of that
Speaker 1: is just because I still have to figure out exactly
Speaker 1: what that's all gonna be. So, uh, next week we'll
Speaker 1: see exactly kind of how that all went down as well,
Speaker 1: But we're gonna have to wait till then, Katie. Thank
Speaker 1: you so much. Thank you for joining us, thank you
Speaker 1: for killing us. We're already partying ways. Will I ever
Speaker 1: see you guys again on the poject? Probably you can
Speaker 1: come back every week if you want. The door is
Speaker 1: always open, The virtual door is always open for Katie.
Speaker 1: And how excited, How excited are we us to put
Speaker 1: in the rearview mirror. Um. But yeah, Katie, thank you
Speaker 1: for filling us in on your your, your life, your
Speaker 1: your relationship with James. He sounds lovely. We can't get
Speaker 1: to We can't wait to get to know him a
Speaker 1: little bit better once you guys progress. It's it's a
Speaker 1: tricky thing when your boyfriend lives across the pond. Um,
Speaker 1: but we'll be looking forward to that. Jared, thank you
Speaker 1: for scrooging us, and thank you too, are a great guest.
Speaker 1: Maya be sure to check her out at Rewarding Relationships
Speaker 1: dot com and also, don't forget it, tune in next
Speaker 1: week where maybe we will suck just a little bit
Speaker 1: less hopefully probably follow help by suck at dating on
Speaker 1: I Heart Radio or wherever you listen to podcast