1 00:00:04,840 --> 00:00:07,840 Speaker 1: Hey, this is Annie and Samantha and welcome to stuff 2 00:00:07,840 --> 00:00:19,320 Speaker 1: I've never told your protection of I Heart Radio. Before 3 00:00:19,320 --> 00:00:21,239 Speaker 1: we get started in this one today, we did want 4 00:00:21,239 --> 00:00:24,360 Speaker 1: to put a quick trigger warning. We are going to 5 00:00:24,440 --> 00:00:28,400 Speaker 1: be discussing topics of sexualization, especially of young girls, and 6 00:00:28,440 --> 00:00:33,520 Speaker 1: potentially molestation, UM and abuse like that. Uh. It's always 7 00:00:33,560 --> 00:00:35,159 Speaker 1: interesting when you put these trigger warnings at the top 8 00:00:35,200 --> 00:00:38,839 Speaker 1: before you've recorded it. Uh. I'm not really sure how 9 00:00:38,880 --> 00:00:40,280 Speaker 1: far is it's going to go into that. I don't 10 00:00:40,280 --> 00:00:42,120 Speaker 1: think we're gonna get to in depth, but if that's 11 00:00:42,159 --> 00:00:44,240 Speaker 1: something you're worried about, I want to put that out there. 12 00:00:44,720 --> 00:00:48,120 Speaker 1: And we also want to welcome a guest because today 13 00:00:48,960 --> 00:00:52,159 Speaker 1: we are once again joined by Jamie Loftus of the 14 00:00:52,200 --> 00:00:56,320 Speaker 1: Bechdel Cast and the new podcast called the Low LEGDA Podcast. 15 00:00:56,480 --> 00:00:58,640 Speaker 1: Thank you so much for joining us, Jamie. I'm so 16 00:00:58,720 --> 00:01:02,080 Speaker 1: excited to be here. Thank you for having me. Yes 17 00:01:02,360 --> 00:01:04,200 Speaker 1: you last time you were here. I totally had to 18 00:01:04,200 --> 00:01:07,080 Speaker 1: look it up because it feels like literally ten million 19 00:01:07,160 --> 00:01:09,880 Speaker 1: years ago. How he was. I was wondering that. I 20 00:01:09,920 --> 00:01:12,560 Speaker 1: was like, how that I have lost all concept of time? 21 00:01:12,680 --> 00:01:15,280 Speaker 1: When right? I think it was two and a half 22 00:01:15,360 --> 00:01:19,280 Speaker 1: years ago for me. So that I was like, we 23 00:01:19,400 --> 00:01:25,400 Speaker 1: just met. Yes, remember how long I've been with the podcast? 24 00:01:25,520 --> 00:01:30,440 Speaker 1: I was like, uh before them, Yes, yes, I believe 25 00:01:30,480 --> 00:01:31,720 Speaker 1: it was soon and a half years ago. And we 26 00:01:31,720 --> 00:01:36,280 Speaker 1: were discussing basically mothers in movies and like evil stepmothers 27 00:01:36,280 --> 00:01:39,600 Speaker 1: and evils and stuff like that. Yeah, which was which 28 00:01:39,640 --> 00:01:42,400 Speaker 1: was fun. Um So, we're so glad to have you back. 29 00:01:42,400 --> 00:01:46,840 Speaker 1: And today we wanted to talk about your new podcast, 30 00:01:46,880 --> 00:01:52,280 Speaker 1: the lead to podcast and um issues that you delve 31 00:01:52,320 --> 00:01:55,760 Speaker 1: into in that show. But I guess first, for people 32 00:01:55,840 --> 00:01:59,520 Speaker 1: who also have a weird concept of time, can you 33 00:01:59,600 --> 00:02:01,600 Speaker 1: introduce you see yourself and tell us a little bit 34 00:02:01,600 --> 00:02:07,400 Speaker 1: about yourself? Sure? So I'm a comedian by trade, which 35 00:02:07,640 --> 00:02:10,200 Speaker 1: sounds weird matched up with this podcast, but it's true. 36 00:02:11,000 --> 00:02:14,720 Speaker 1: Uh So, I'm a comedian and podcaster and TV writer. 37 00:02:15,240 --> 00:02:17,640 Speaker 1: I host The Bechdel Cast, which is a feminist movie 38 00:02:17,639 --> 00:02:21,480 Speaker 1: podcast that's been on my Heart radio for four years 39 00:02:21,560 --> 00:02:28,880 Speaker 1: today four more years. Uh but but and yeah, I've 40 00:02:29,000 --> 00:02:32,200 Speaker 1: also hosted um investigative shows. I did a show called 41 00:02:32,240 --> 00:02:36,200 Speaker 1: My Year in Mensa earlier where I spent a year 42 00:02:36,919 --> 00:02:40,120 Speaker 1: uh in mensa and kind of getting to the bottom 43 00:02:40,200 --> 00:02:43,960 Speaker 1: of um a, you know, low level Supremacy group basically. 44 00:02:44,160 --> 00:02:47,880 Speaker 1: And uh, then for the past six months I've been 45 00:02:47,919 --> 00:02:51,359 Speaker 1: working on Lolita podcasts. So it's been it's been more 46 00:02:51,400 --> 00:02:55,680 Speaker 1: of a depressing year for for work, but but I'm 47 00:02:55,800 --> 00:02:58,239 Speaker 1: happy to be doing it. So you're just doing the 48 00:02:58,960 --> 00:03:01,520 Speaker 1: thing and making it all like dooming gloom a little bit, 49 00:03:02,040 --> 00:03:07,519 Speaker 1: just doubling and tripling down. Yeah, I feel like that 50 00:03:07,520 --> 00:03:09,840 Speaker 1: fits in with this show. We cover a lot of 51 00:03:09,880 --> 00:03:13,360 Speaker 1: fun topics, but many of them always have like this 52 00:03:13,480 --> 00:03:20,600 Speaker 1: tinge of but also patriarchy. Yes, exactly. We've been doing 53 00:03:20,639 --> 00:03:23,440 Speaker 1: that on the on the Bechtel Cast too, or like 54 00:03:23,480 --> 00:03:26,080 Speaker 1: we'll do three depressing movies and then we're like, Okay, 55 00:03:26,120 --> 00:03:31,720 Speaker 1: we're gonna do Flubber today because otherwise we're going to 56 00:03:31,840 --> 00:03:37,440 Speaker 1: start to lose the thread. So yeah, yes, Um, so 57 00:03:37,800 --> 00:03:42,760 Speaker 1: can you tell us a little bit about the Lolita podcast? Uh? Yeah, 58 00:03:42,800 --> 00:03:45,280 Speaker 1: this is a project that has been kind of in 59 00:03:45,320 --> 00:03:50,040 Speaker 1: the back of my mind for several years now because, um, 60 00:03:50,560 --> 00:03:55,240 Speaker 1: growing up, I definitely read Lolita far too young and 61 00:03:55,280 --> 00:03:58,080 Speaker 1: it really affected I read it when I was twelve, 62 00:03:58,200 --> 00:04:02,640 Speaker 1: I think maybe even eleven, and it really affected me 63 00:04:02,920 --> 00:04:07,120 Speaker 1: in a way that was not helpful, and for years 64 00:04:07,120 --> 00:04:09,320 Speaker 1: I found myself saying like, oh, it's my favorite book. 65 00:04:09,560 --> 00:04:12,640 Speaker 1: But it was because it had been recommended to me 66 00:04:12,720 --> 00:04:17,880 Speaker 1: by my favorite children's author, and I had no context. 67 00:04:17,960 --> 00:04:20,520 Speaker 1: I had no like, it had just been presented to 68 00:04:20,520 --> 00:04:24,320 Speaker 1: me the entirely wrong way. I was too young to 69 00:04:24,360 --> 00:04:27,200 Speaker 1: be reading it, and you know, all of the cultural 70 00:04:27,200 --> 00:04:31,320 Speaker 1: aesthetics surrounding it don't help you with the context at all, 71 00:04:31,440 --> 00:04:35,159 Speaker 1: and it makes it worse. Um. And so for years 72 00:04:35,160 --> 00:04:37,200 Speaker 1: I went back and reread it a couple of years 73 00:04:37,240 --> 00:04:40,359 Speaker 1: ago and was kind of and had a very different 74 00:04:40,920 --> 00:04:45,120 Speaker 1: read um of the book. And and so I've been 75 00:04:45,200 --> 00:04:49,359 Speaker 1: just spending the past six months going into well, why 76 00:04:49,720 --> 00:04:52,200 Speaker 1: is this book remembered the way it is a lot 77 00:04:52,200 --> 00:04:55,000 Speaker 1: of it has to do, I think, with the way 78 00:04:55,000 --> 00:04:57,440 Speaker 1: that it's been adapted and just and the way that 79 00:04:57,480 --> 00:05:00,800 Speaker 1: it's been talked about over the years. So that's what 80 00:05:01,400 --> 00:05:06,200 Speaker 1: I'm doing this ten hour podcast about, is kind of 81 00:05:06,240 --> 00:05:08,560 Speaker 1: getting to the bottom of tracing that legacy, because I 82 00:05:08,600 --> 00:05:14,120 Speaker 1: do think it's an important example of, um, how we 83 00:05:14,920 --> 00:05:21,599 Speaker 1: treat victims of abused particularly children, and and um, how 84 00:05:22,080 --> 00:05:26,080 Speaker 1: you know, bad adaptation and you know, the the wrong 85 00:05:26,200 --> 00:05:30,720 Speaker 1: kind of cultural discussion. Essentially, can you know, take a 86 00:05:30,839 --> 00:05:34,560 Speaker 1: valuable story and turn it into something that's the exact opposite. 87 00:05:34,800 --> 00:05:41,280 Speaker 1: And so yeah, yeah, and I think, um, a couple 88 00:05:41,279 --> 00:05:43,440 Speaker 1: of disclaimers here. I suppose One, you don't have to 89 00:05:43,440 --> 00:05:47,520 Speaker 1: have read the book to listen to this podcast. Two, 90 00:05:47,839 --> 00:05:52,039 Speaker 1: I haven't read the book, So I'm really excited about 91 00:05:52,040 --> 00:05:56,200 Speaker 1: this because Three Samantha has some really strong things about 92 00:05:56,279 --> 00:05:59,360 Speaker 1: this book. Yeah, I'm excited to hear, right. I know. 93 00:06:00,200 --> 00:06:03,120 Speaker 1: It's so funny. When we were approached to having this 94 00:06:03,320 --> 00:06:05,200 Speaker 1: as a topic, I was like, oh my god, and 95 00:06:05,240 --> 00:06:07,679 Speaker 1: I think you had already talked about it even before 96 00:06:07,760 --> 00:06:10,280 Speaker 1: this came up. I don't even know why I did, 97 00:06:10,760 --> 00:06:12,960 Speaker 1: but I did have a question, what made you think 98 00:06:12,960 --> 00:06:15,000 Speaker 1: this is something that you wanted to talk about? Like 99 00:06:15,080 --> 00:06:17,080 Speaker 1: what even brought it to the forefront. I need to 100 00:06:17,120 --> 00:06:19,080 Speaker 1: reread this book. I need to, you know. And then 101 00:06:19,240 --> 00:06:21,120 Speaker 1: having that breakdown, I'm like, oh my god, this is 102 00:06:21,160 --> 00:06:25,200 Speaker 1: not what i'd expected or what I remembered from it. Uh. 103 00:06:25,480 --> 00:06:27,760 Speaker 1: I guess what made me reread it a couple of 104 00:06:27,839 --> 00:06:30,800 Speaker 1: years ago was that I was just kind of I 105 00:06:30,839 --> 00:06:34,279 Speaker 1: was talking to some friends from home, and like a 106 00:06:34,320 --> 00:06:36,719 Speaker 1: friend of mine remembered how I had had my copy 107 00:06:36,720 --> 00:06:40,280 Speaker 1: of Lolita, like taken by my gym teacher when I 108 00:06:40,320 --> 00:06:42,000 Speaker 1: was in middle school and they were kind of like 109 00:06:42,040 --> 00:06:45,440 Speaker 1: teasing me about it, and I was just I don't know, Yeah, 110 00:06:45,480 --> 00:06:47,799 Speaker 1: I was just like wow, I like it just hadn't 111 00:06:47,839 --> 00:06:52,120 Speaker 1: struck me. How like off it was that I had 112 00:06:52,160 --> 00:06:54,920 Speaker 1: been so determined to read it so young, And so 113 00:06:55,120 --> 00:06:58,039 Speaker 1: that was I just wanted to revisit it, basically, because 114 00:06:58,440 --> 00:07:01,080 Speaker 1: especially like doing a show like The Petel Cast, I'm 115 00:07:01,120 --> 00:07:04,000 Speaker 1: constantly in the mode of like, oh, that media I 116 00:07:04,040 --> 00:07:07,160 Speaker 1: consumed as a child, you know, most likely me up 117 00:07:07,200 --> 00:07:10,760 Speaker 1: in some way, but I don't even know how, you know. Um, 118 00:07:10,880 --> 00:07:14,160 Speaker 1: And so yeah, so that was kind of why I 119 00:07:14,200 --> 00:07:17,600 Speaker 1: jumped back into it originally. And then, um, there's been 120 00:07:17,680 --> 00:07:22,280 Speaker 1: just so much continued discussion about it over the years, 121 00:07:22,320 --> 00:07:26,600 Speaker 1: but never in a really extended concise way, And so 122 00:07:26,760 --> 00:07:29,960 Speaker 1: I was kind of at the mind of the discussion 123 00:07:30,280 --> 00:07:32,840 Speaker 1: around this book has been so consistent. It's clearly not 124 00:07:32,880 --> 00:07:37,360 Speaker 1: going to go away. So someone should do the full 125 00:07:37,840 --> 00:07:40,760 Speaker 1: you know, do the full analysis and and you know, 126 00:07:40,880 --> 00:07:45,640 Speaker 1: go into the trilli and terrible adaptations of this project 127 00:07:45,680 --> 00:07:48,679 Speaker 1: and kind of figure out why it has had such 128 00:07:48,760 --> 00:07:55,320 Speaker 1: a negative cultural net effect. Yeah, and before we get 129 00:07:55,360 --> 00:07:59,200 Speaker 1: into that effect. And also, Samantha your why it impacted 130 00:07:59,240 --> 00:08:03,000 Speaker 1: you so much? Um, I guess for someone like me 131 00:08:03,080 --> 00:08:05,440 Speaker 1: who I have a very vague idea what this is about, 132 00:08:05,560 --> 00:08:11,120 Speaker 1: could you give a synopsis of Lolita? Yeah? So, Uh. 133 00:08:11,360 --> 00:08:16,320 Speaker 1: Lolita is a book by Vladimir in abuk of Um 134 00:08:16,320 --> 00:08:20,440 Speaker 1: that is told from the perspective of a child sex 135 00:08:20,520 --> 00:08:25,360 Speaker 1: abuser named Humbert humbert Um. He is narrating the entire book. 136 00:08:25,760 --> 00:08:29,760 Speaker 1: The book is framed uh with a foreword from a 137 00:08:29,800 --> 00:08:33,280 Speaker 1: psychologist who tells you that this is a book being 138 00:08:33,400 --> 00:08:36,959 Speaker 1: told by a child sex abuser who's trying to basically 139 00:08:37,000 --> 00:08:40,680 Speaker 1: win your favor as a reader. And so the and 140 00:08:40,679 --> 00:08:45,560 Speaker 1: and so Humbert humbert Um is basically detailing uh, this 141 00:08:46,040 --> 00:08:50,600 Speaker 1: five year period in which he's you know, molesting a 142 00:08:50,640 --> 00:08:55,040 Speaker 1: young girl named Dolores. Uh. He marries her mother in 143 00:08:55,160 --> 00:08:59,160 Speaker 1: order to get closer to her. Her mother dies, it's 144 00:08:59,160 --> 00:09:03,200 Speaker 1: probably he at it. Uh. You know that's a hot take, 145 00:09:03,320 --> 00:09:07,599 Speaker 1: but it probably he did. Um. And then he abducts 146 00:09:07,600 --> 00:09:12,040 Speaker 1: her and um, you know, has her kind of under 147 00:09:12,200 --> 00:09:17,280 Speaker 1: his caretaking as he's abusing her for several years. Uh. 148 00:09:17,440 --> 00:09:22,920 Speaker 1: She gets away when she's fourteen, and then at the end, Uh, 149 00:09:23,120 --> 00:09:28,200 Speaker 1: she's seventeen and pregnant and married and they see each 150 00:09:28,200 --> 00:09:32,760 Speaker 1: other one last time and then they both die and 151 00:09:32,840 --> 00:09:41,040 Speaker 1: that's they don't die, they die separately. He dies in prison. Uh, 152 00:09:41,080 --> 00:09:44,800 Speaker 1: but not because he was arrested for being a child 153 00:09:44,880 --> 00:09:51,559 Speaker 1: sex abuser. He gets arrested because he murdered someone else. Wow, 154 00:09:51,559 --> 00:09:57,120 Speaker 1: it's heave. It's very heavy. That was darker than I 155 00:09:57,160 --> 00:10:00,960 Speaker 1: thought it would be, and I was prepared for pretty dark. Yeah. 156 00:10:01,480 --> 00:10:02,839 Speaker 1: I definitely gave her that warning. I was like, you 157 00:10:02,840 --> 00:10:04,360 Speaker 1: don't need to read the book, as in fact, don't 158 00:10:04,360 --> 00:10:09,400 Speaker 1: read the book because she's for researching in depth and 159 00:10:09,480 --> 00:10:11,760 Speaker 1: cannot just do a little bit. She must read all 160 00:10:11,800 --> 00:10:13,280 Speaker 1: of it. I'm like, no, no, no no, no, seriously, don't 161 00:10:13,280 --> 00:10:16,960 Speaker 1: read this book. It's yeah, and there's a there's like 162 00:10:17,000 --> 00:10:20,559 Speaker 1: a pretty detailed synopsis in the first episode of the 163 00:10:20,600 --> 00:10:23,560 Speaker 1: podcast for people, you know, for that exact reason, for 164 00:10:23,559 --> 00:10:25,079 Speaker 1: people who don't want to read the book, because it's 165 00:10:25,080 --> 00:10:28,120 Speaker 1: totally understandable, right, And I think you did a great job. 166 00:10:28,120 --> 00:10:31,000 Speaker 1: I listened to that episode, and uh, you also had 167 00:10:31,040 --> 00:10:33,800 Speaker 1: people call in. You have people calling in giving their opinions, 168 00:10:34,080 --> 00:10:36,920 Speaker 1: and it was really interesting to hear the back and 169 00:10:37,000 --> 00:10:40,000 Speaker 1: forth and even like as uh, because of course I 170 00:10:40,040 --> 00:10:42,880 Speaker 1: follow you on Twitter because you're amazing and hilarious and 171 00:10:42,880 --> 00:10:47,480 Speaker 1: everything is very important. Um. But like people's response to 172 00:10:47,679 --> 00:10:49,920 Speaker 1: your talking about this book, we're talking about the fact 173 00:10:49,960 --> 00:10:52,120 Speaker 1: you did a podcast, not even talking about what you're 174 00:10:52,160 --> 00:10:56,080 Speaker 1: going to talk about. People's reaction is very heated, as 175 00:10:56,160 --> 00:10:59,880 Speaker 1: mine was as well. Sure, obviously, what are some of 176 00:10:59,920 --> 00:11:04,240 Speaker 1: the commonalities that you've gotten in this reactions from people? Um, 177 00:11:04,320 --> 00:11:07,200 Speaker 1: it's been kind of an interesting mix, but it falls 178 00:11:07,200 --> 00:11:12,720 Speaker 1: into a few kind of common categories. Um, there are there. 179 00:11:12,760 --> 00:11:15,640 Speaker 1: There were especially when I had just announced the podcast 180 00:11:15,640 --> 00:11:19,280 Speaker 1: and not released anything, there were a bunch of listeners 181 00:11:19,280 --> 00:11:24,000 Speaker 1: that are like, I don't like this book. I don't 182 00:11:24,040 --> 00:11:27,360 Speaker 1: like its legacy, I don't like the fact that it exists. UM, 183 00:11:27,960 --> 00:11:30,520 Speaker 1: and you know, I think kind of like, you know, 184 00:11:30,600 --> 00:11:32,960 Speaker 1: just had a very strong negative reaction to it. Sometimes 185 00:11:33,000 --> 00:11:38,199 Speaker 1: that's because of their own personal histories as well. UM, 186 00:11:38,240 --> 00:11:41,960 Speaker 1: So that's certainly one common reaction. There's other people who 187 00:11:42,360 --> 00:11:47,920 Speaker 1: were like I did get a lot out of this book, um, 188 00:11:47,960 --> 00:11:51,720 Speaker 1: sometimes based with on you know, similar histories of abuse 189 00:11:51,760 --> 00:11:54,080 Speaker 1: and you know, having I don't know, there's so many 190 00:11:54,080 --> 00:11:56,679 Speaker 1: ways to approach it, where some people enjoyed the book, 191 00:11:56,679 --> 00:11:59,439 Speaker 1: but they felt guilty for enjoying the book and they 192 00:11:59,480 --> 00:12:02,280 Speaker 1: wanted to unpack, like what that was. There are the 193 00:12:02,320 --> 00:12:05,679 Speaker 1: people who absolutely despise the book. Uh, there were a 194 00:12:05,720 --> 00:12:09,000 Speaker 1: lot of people who hadn't read the book, but we're 195 00:12:09,040 --> 00:12:12,520 Speaker 1: only familiar with the aesthetics and the cultural legacy of it. 196 00:12:13,040 --> 00:12:15,880 Speaker 1: And then there were a lot a lot of scholars 197 00:12:16,240 --> 00:12:21,080 Speaker 1: who um are into Lolita fashion, which has nothing to 198 00:12:21,120 --> 00:12:23,480 Speaker 1: do with the book, and they were like, please leave 199 00:12:23,559 --> 00:12:26,680 Speaker 1: us out of this narrative. So those for the common 200 00:12:26,800 --> 00:12:28,880 Speaker 1: those are the common reactions which I want to come 201 00:12:28,920 --> 00:12:31,880 Speaker 1: back to. Because I was like, what what Yeah, yeah, 202 00:12:32,240 --> 00:12:34,320 Speaker 1: I've never heard of this, right. I mentioned it to 203 00:12:34,559 --> 00:12:36,520 Speaker 1: eight because, like I said, as I was reading this, 204 00:12:36,600 --> 00:12:38,920 Speaker 1: I was like, what is Okay, Well, we'll come back, 205 00:12:39,360 --> 00:12:42,280 Speaker 1: but we do want to come back to d um 206 00:12:42,320 --> 00:12:47,200 Speaker 1: But as we were talking about what's happening with the 207 00:12:47,320 --> 00:12:51,120 Speaker 1: cultural perspective of Lolita and why it has grown into 208 00:12:51,160 --> 00:12:53,560 Speaker 1: such way, I am one of those that caught caught 209 00:12:53,600 --> 00:12:55,959 Speaker 1: up because I did, like you mentioned in your episode, 210 00:12:56,000 --> 00:13:01,040 Speaker 1: forget the prologue. I absolutely forgot because it's been fifteen 211 00:13:01,120 --> 00:13:04,440 Speaker 1: years since i've read it. Sure. Look, I can't remember 212 00:13:04,480 --> 00:13:08,480 Speaker 1: time over fifteen years, probably like twenty years actually since 213 00:13:08,520 --> 00:13:11,680 Speaker 1: I've read it, but it's definitely impacted me. But everything 214 00:13:11,720 --> 00:13:14,319 Speaker 1: else I remembered, and so the way you framed it, 215 00:13:14,360 --> 00:13:16,760 Speaker 1: I was like, Oh, you're right, it is this way, 216 00:13:16,840 --> 00:13:19,480 Speaker 1: But can you talk about what this book has done 217 00:13:19,520 --> 00:13:22,800 Speaker 1: in that perspective of how we see especially because the 218 00:13:22,840 --> 00:13:25,200 Speaker 1: turn of Lolita has its own meaning, it is a 219 00:13:25,240 --> 00:13:28,840 Speaker 1: whole other Urban dictionary level of meaning, as well as 220 00:13:29,000 --> 00:13:31,200 Speaker 1: the origins of the word and in fete, which I 221 00:13:31,200 --> 00:13:34,679 Speaker 1: will never forget reading that. Yeah, oh absolutely, There's so 222 00:13:34,679 --> 00:13:37,800 Speaker 1: many like very very dark parts of this book that 223 00:13:38,080 --> 00:13:41,280 Speaker 1: I just I remember reading as a kid and just 224 00:13:41,400 --> 00:13:46,240 Speaker 1: being like, God, Jesus Christ, you know it is I 225 00:13:47,240 --> 00:13:50,520 Speaker 1: genuinely I don't. I think it's and it's and it's 226 00:13:50,600 --> 00:13:53,800 Speaker 1: unrealistic to think that. You know, kids will not get 227 00:13:53,840 --> 00:13:57,400 Speaker 1: their hands on books if they truly want to, but 228 00:13:57,520 --> 00:14:00,200 Speaker 1: I really hope they don't on this one. It's like 229 00:14:00,320 --> 00:14:05,360 Speaker 1: extremely extremely um heavy. But the sorry, wait, what was 230 00:14:05,400 --> 00:14:08,680 Speaker 1: the question I just got? I have a habit of 231 00:14:08,880 --> 00:14:14,560 Speaker 1: double questioning questions, So you asked the question was specifically about, 232 00:14:14,760 --> 00:14:17,640 Speaker 1: you know, the the cultural connotations behind it with like 233 00:14:17,679 --> 00:14:19,840 Speaker 1: the word lolita and then fete and which is this 234 00:14:19,920 --> 00:14:23,480 Speaker 1: is the beginning of where we see it created. Yeah, 235 00:14:23,600 --> 00:14:27,880 Speaker 1: so I think that that happens almost instantaneously when the 236 00:14:27,920 --> 00:14:32,360 Speaker 1: book is released. Um, the way that it's received and 237 00:14:32,400 --> 00:14:36,320 Speaker 1: the culture it's kind of received into kind of immediately 238 00:14:36,360 --> 00:14:39,520 Speaker 1: misses the point. Um. And that's something that I've gotten 239 00:14:39,760 --> 00:14:44,320 Speaker 1: into where there there's you know, people feel whichever way 240 00:14:44,360 --> 00:14:47,600 Speaker 1: they feel about the book. Um, it does seem that 241 00:14:47,840 --> 00:14:52,960 Speaker 1: Nabokov's intent was to tell a cautionary tale that clearly 242 00:14:53,000 --> 00:14:57,440 Speaker 1: condemns the protagonist. But that immediately you see in the 243 00:14:57,480 --> 00:15:01,120 Speaker 1: reviews of the book that a lot of like sis 244 00:15:01,160 --> 00:15:04,960 Speaker 1: white male reviewers of this book do not understand that 245 00:15:05,040 --> 00:15:07,680 Speaker 1: at all, and they immediately start branding it like a 246 00:15:07,760 --> 00:15:10,240 Speaker 1: love story and like you've got a hand it to 247 00:15:10,360 --> 00:15:16,040 Speaker 1: Humbert Hume Burt and you know, just immediately missing the 248 00:15:16,080 --> 00:15:19,480 Speaker 1: fact that the you know, just ignoring the fact that 249 00:15:19,520 --> 00:15:23,200 Speaker 1: you're told that this is a you know, serial abuser 250 00:15:23,440 --> 00:15:27,960 Speaker 1: on the first page and buying into the protagonist who 251 00:15:28,040 --> 00:15:30,760 Speaker 1: is lying to you to try to, you know, save 252 00:15:31,160 --> 00:15:35,040 Speaker 1: save himself from having to spend life in prison. And 253 00:15:35,040 --> 00:15:39,680 Speaker 1: and so um, that happens the second the book is released, 254 00:15:40,400 --> 00:15:45,400 Speaker 1: and um continues to happen in all the adaptations. There's 255 00:15:46,160 --> 00:15:51,720 Speaker 1: really no adaptation that exists that isn't just missing the point. 256 00:15:51,760 --> 00:15:55,200 Speaker 1: It's also for there's just this this trend of of 257 00:15:55,360 --> 00:15:59,400 Speaker 1: picking creators to adapt this story that like are uniquely 258 00:16:00,560 --> 00:16:03,680 Speaker 1: qualified to miss the point. It's just like it's just 259 00:16:03,800 --> 00:16:07,239 Speaker 1: above and beyond. So it happens pretty much right away, 260 00:16:07,400 --> 00:16:13,400 Speaker 1: and UH never really has course corrected up until you know, recently, 261 00:16:13,440 --> 00:16:17,000 Speaker 1: there's been more of an interest in viewing the text 262 00:16:17,320 --> 00:16:22,160 Speaker 1: from a survivor's perspective and UM from a female perspective. 263 00:16:22,680 --> 00:16:26,000 Speaker 1: There's a lot of really interesting trans perspectives on this book. 264 00:16:26,800 --> 00:16:30,080 Speaker 1: But it's just these perspectives are just sort of starting 265 00:16:30,480 --> 00:16:33,160 Speaker 1: to come to the front now. It's for so long 266 00:16:33,320 --> 00:16:37,280 Speaker 1: just been adapted by white guys who seem to really 267 00:16:37,280 --> 00:16:41,080 Speaker 1: have a lot of contempt uh for the protagonist, and 268 00:16:41,200 --> 00:16:43,640 Speaker 1: so that kind of carries through. But there has been 269 00:16:43,680 --> 00:16:47,000 Speaker 1: over the years, you know, It's it's the internet communities 270 00:16:47,040 --> 00:16:51,200 Speaker 1: that have formed around that are there's myriad there's so 271 00:16:51,240 --> 00:16:54,480 Speaker 1: many uh and and they all sort of have their 272 00:16:54,520 --> 00:16:58,040 Speaker 1: perspective on on the text. So it's weird there's kind 273 00:16:58,080 --> 00:17:02,840 Speaker 1: of like an underground reclamation effort. But you know, all 274 00:17:02,880 --> 00:17:06,199 Speaker 1: the all the large adaptations have been done by UM 275 00:17:06,400 --> 00:17:11,320 Speaker 1: people who I think just completely missed the point. Yeah, 276 00:17:11,359 --> 00:17:13,800 Speaker 1: and that's kind of uh, you know, we were talking 277 00:17:13,800 --> 00:17:16,760 Speaker 1: about my heavy reaction as a social worker who worked 278 00:17:17,200 --> 00:17:20,679 Speaker 1: with children. I specifically worked with abused children UM with 279 00:17:20,800 --> 00:17:24,240 Speaker 1: the Child and Family Children's Services that when I read this, 280 00:17:24,440 --> 00:17:26,320 Speaker 1: it wasn't because I knew anything about it. I actually 281 00:17:26,440 --> 00:17:28,560 Speaker 1: knew hardly anything. I knew the turn of Little Leader 282 00:17:28,560 --> 00:17:31,560 Speaker 1: at this point, but I didn't quite understand the point 283 00:17:31,560 --> 00:17:34,240 Speaker 1: of this book. And then I went into college, where 284 00:17:34,320 --> 00:17:37,240 Speaker 1: of course I did my English Forces and my you know, 285 00:17:37,359 --> 00:17:40,600 Speaker 1: literary people who loved books said this was their favorite book. 286 00:17:40,600 --> 00:17:42,280 Speaker 1: And I had like four different people telling me this 287 00:17:42,920 --> 00:17:44,879 Speaker 1: um Win back to back to back. So I was like, Okay, 288 00:17:44,960 --> 00:17:46,200 Speaker 1: I need to I need to read this. I need 289 00:17:46,240 --> 00:17:48,359 Speaker 1: to figure out what this is. And I read it 290 00:17:48,359 --> 00:17:50,919 Speaker 1: and I was so angry. I was so angry coming 291 00:17:50,960 --> 00:17:54,359 Speaker 1: from a person as a survivor as well as a 292 00:17:54,359 --> 00:17:55,960 Speaker 1: person who was an advocate and who has worked with 293 00:17:56,040 --> 00:17:59,520 Speaker 1: children for a while. Now seeing this and having this 294 00:17:59,560 --> 00:18:02,640 Speaker 1: moment of like, this is what pedophiles would use as 295 00:18:02,680 --> 00:18:05,159 Speaker 1: an excuse the language that's used within this and of 296 00:18:05,200 --> 00:18:08,880 Speaker 1: course realizing you know, the perspective is from a pedophile 297 00:18:08,960 --> 00:18:12,680 Speaker 1: from the actual Molluster is saying this is love and 298 00:18:13,000 --> 00:18:14,920 Speaker 1: just like how you saying, like people call this a 299 00:18:15,000 --> 00:18:17,480 Speaker 1: love story, which was told to me, was told that, 300 00:18:17,600 --> 00:18:20,439 Speaker 1: like I was explained as that from someone who I 301 00:18:20,480 --> 00:18:22,840 Speaker 1: saw as they were a t a in my English 302 00:18:22,840 --> 00:18:25,679 Speaker 1: class who told me this, and I was pissed. I 303 00:18:25,880 --> 00:18:29,320 Speaker 1: was beyond pissed, and ever since then, I'm like, this 304 00:18:29,400 --> 00:18:34,159 Speaker 1: is absurd, and yes, the book is written well, like, 305 00:18:34,200 --> 00:18:36,879 Speaker 1: there's no denying that he is an amazing writer. And 306 00:18:37,000 --> 00:18:40,440 Speaker 1: I went so far as to disprove about this book 307 00:18:40,600 --> 00:18:43,399 Speaker 1: that I went and got pell Fire and immediately read it. 308 00:18:43,400 --> 00:18:45,200 Speaker 1: I was like, why can't you say this is your favorite? 309 00:18:46,960 --> 00:18:49,800 Speaker 1: There are I always I'm like, there are like so 310 00:18:49,880 --> 00:18:52,639 Speaker 1: many of the bunk up books that are not about 311 00:18:52,960 --> 00:18:57,320 Speaker 1: the most horrifying crime of person commit Like that is 312 00:18:57,400 --> 00:19:00,840 Speaker 1: very sad, and it's still still sad upset, but it's 313 00:19:00,480 --> 00:19:03,639 Speaker 1: at this level where the excuses, well it seems like 314 00:19:03,640 --> 00:19:07,359 Speaker 1: they're excusing their behaviors against a child. But I was like, 315 00:19:07,400 --> 00:19:10,680 Speaker 1: what the hell, But that's like That's how far I went, 316 00:19:10,960 --> 00:19:13,320 Speaker 1: not even having anything to do with this as my 317 00:19:13,400 --> 00:19:16,320 Speaker 1: school work. I was like, I'm not allowing this to stand. 318 00:19:16,480 --> 00:19:19,359 Speaker 1: Like even to this day, I'm like, this is not 319 00:19:19,400 --> 00:19:21,959 Speaker 1: the best y'all, just shut up. But it kind of 320 00:19:22,000 --> 00:19:27,600 Speaker 1: does bring that whole conversation of people individually interpreting it. 321 00:19:27,720 --> 00:19:29,440 Speaker 1: As you said, for the longest time, it was the 322 00:19:29,560 --> 00:19:32,280 Speaker 1: sister hetero mel who was like, Yeah, this is just fine, 323 00:19:32,320 --> 00:19:35,920 Speaker 1: this is perfect. And you even gave examples of past 324 00:19:35,960 --> 00:19:39,680 Speaker 1: literary workers and today who kind of says the same 325 00:19:39,720 --> 00:19:42,720 Speaker 1: thing about and we see that pattern of these older 326 00:19:42,760 --> 00:19:46,920 Speaker 1: men grooming young women and saying it's love. Um. Yeah, 327 00:19:47,080 --> 00:19:49,000 Speaker 1: can you talk a little more about like why you 328 00:19:49,040 --> 00:19:51,560 Speaker 1: see that? Uh why, I don't know if you know 329 00:19:51,600 --> 00:19:54,399 Speaker 1: the answers, but like how it latches on to that 330 00:19:54,520 --> 00:19:58,400 Speaker 1: kind of perspective. So I guess one thing that I 331 00:19:58,480 --> 00:20:01,600 Speaker 1: look because what was really kind of like gnawing at 332 00:20:01,640 --> 00:20:04,000 Speaker 1: me when I started, and like a huge question I 333 00:20:04,040 --> 00:20:10,440 Speaker 1: had was like why did Nabokov right this? Like why why, 334 00:20:10,560 --> 00:20:14,520 Speaker 1: Like you have to have there has to be a reason, um. 335 00:20:14,640 --> 00:20:16,920 Speaker 1: And so I went back and I spoke to his 336 00:20:16,960 --> 00:20:20,359 Speaker 1: biographers and I went kind of deep into his life 337 00:20:20,400 --> 00:20:23,399 Speaker 1: to see like he was not an abuser. There, there's 338 00:20:23,560 --> 00:20:26,880 Speaker 1: no behavioral patterns like that. But I did find that 339 00:20:27,000 --> 00:20:32,600 Speaker 1: he had been a survivor of child sexual abuse himself, 340 00:20:33,400 --> 00:20:37,159 Speaker 1: and which kind of put it into perspective for me 341 00:20:37,280 --> 00:20:39,840 Speaker 1: a little more. It was never something he talked about publicly, 342 00:20:39,920 --> 00:20:43,040 Speaker 1: but his biographer was like, well, this was like a 343 00:20:43,160 --> 00:20:47,239 Speaker 1: common theme in his early life, and so there is 344 00:20:47,320 --> 00:20:51,280 Speaker 1: this throw line in Nabokov's work where children are abused 345 00:20:51,359 --> 00:20:56,119 Speaker 1: and ignored and disbelieved, And so it was that was 346 00:20:56,160 --> 00:20:59,760 Speaker 1: just the kind of an interesting um thought to connect 347 00:20:59,760 --> 00:21:01,760 Speaker 1: to be because I could never really track, you know, 348 00:21:02,400 --> 00:21:04,919 Speaker 1: why what is his fixation on this theme? And it 349 00:21:04,960 --> 00:21:07,200 Speaker 1: seems like I can't ask him, but it seems like 350 00:21:07,240 --> 00:21:11,600 Speaker 1: it could have conceivably been something personal. Um As to 351 00:21:11,840 --> 00:21:17,879 Speaker 1: how how people have consistently taken it out of context, 352 00:21:18,359 --> 00:21:20,639 Speaker 1: I mean, there's there's a million examples of it. The 353 00:21:20,680 --> 00:21:25,560 Speaker 1: earliest adaptation is the Stanley Kuberck movie from nineteen sixty two, 354 00:21:25,720 --> 00:21:29,680 Speaker 1: and that one is I mean, they're all bad. This 355 00:21:30,040 --> 00:21:34,560 Speaker 1: one is particularly so because it just sets up a 356 00:21:34,640 --> 00:21:40,000 Speaker 1: lot of the common adaptation changes that you know, kind 357 00:21:40,000 --> 00:21:43,679 Speaker 1: of manipulate the general public into thinking that this is 358 00:21:43,720 --> 00:21:48,080 Speaker 1: acceptable and that Lolita or Dolores, depending on how you 359 00:21:48,160 --> 00:21:51,399 Speaker 1: referred to her, but that she could possibly be a 360 00:21:51,440 --> 00:21:56,040 Speaker 1: consenting party, which she can't. But the nineteen sixties doesn't 361 00:21:56,080 --> 00:21:59,119 Speaker 1: view it that way. Stanley Kuber, who has a god 362 00:21:59,160 --> 00:22:04,680 Speaker 1: awful track record in terms of female characters working with women, 363 00:22:05,040 --> 00:22:08,639 Speaker 1: you know at all, he's just not the person to 364 00:22:08,720 --> 00:22:11,960 Speaker 1: be doing it. And then um, on top of that, 365 00:22:12,000 --> 00:22:15,840 Speaker 1: there there was a story that broke just less than 366 00:22:15,880 --> 00:22:19,840 Speaker 1: two months ago that detailed that the producer of the 367 00:22:19,840 --> 00:22:24,800 Speaker 1: movie had allegedly sexually abused the star, the actress who 368 00:22:25,400 --> 00:22:29,280 Speaker 1: was playing Lovelita. So it's there is this just through 369 00:22:29,359 --> 00:22:32,280 Speaker 1: line of it couldn't be more clear that the people 370 00:22:32,320 --> 00:22:37,359 Speaker 1: put in charge of UM telling this story uh have 371 00:22:37,560 --> 00:22:40,639 Speaker 1: no interest in actually telling it. They're more interested in 372 00:22:40,960 --> 00:22:45,120 Speaker 1: empowering the abuser. And it just basically demonstrates that they've fallen, 373 00:22:45,840 --> 00:22:48,960 Speaker 1: uh fallen for it. They've fallen for the lies that 374 00:22:49,000 --> 00:22:51,960 Speaker 1: this protagonist is telling, and they're taking his worldview at 375 00:22:51,960 --> 00:22:55,440 Speaker 1: face value, which is an extremely dangerous road to go down. 376 00:22:56,080 --> 00:22:58,520 Speaker 1: And then the other thing about about the first adaptation 377 00:22:58,640 --> 00:23:02,359 Speaker 1: is like, I feel like the most potent cultural image 378 00:23:02,359 --> 00:23:05,560 Speaker 1: of Lolita is the you know, girl gazing over the glasses, 379 00:23:05,880 --> 00:23:08,520 Speaker 1: which is not something that even appears in the movie. 380 00:23:08,720 --> 00:23:11,600 Speaker 1: It's not something that appears in any adaptation. It was 381 00:23:11,800 --> 00:23:17,760 Speaker 1: just strictly marketing of like male gaze driven marketing. And 382 00:23:17,880 --> 00:23:20,000 Speaker 1: so that to me is like one of the most 383 00:23:20,000 --> 00:23:23,720 Speaker 1: concise examples that and the way that the covers of 384 00:23:23,760 --> 00:23:27,320 Speaker 1: the book are designed that it's just like, well, it's 385 00:23:27,359 --> 00:23:31,760 Speaker 1: it's not just an issue with this book in particular, 386 00:23:31,800 --> 00:23:36,120 Speaker 1: it's it's an issue with how we characterize these stories 387 00:23:36,280 --> 00:23:39,080 Speaker 1: at all. That the fact that all the you know, 388 00:23:39,600 --> 00:23:45,679 Speaker 1: marketing images are blaming the victims of abuse just before 389 00:23:45,720 --> 00:23:49,439 Speaker 1: you even open the book. Um, that like says something 390 00:23:49,560 --> 00:23:52,199 Speaker 1: about the culture it's being released into and what they 391 00:23:52,200 --> 00:23:56,679 Speaker 1: think is going to be marketable to people. We have 392 00:23:56,760 --> 00:23:58,320 Speaker 1: some more for you listeners, but first we have a 393 00:23:58,359 --> 00:24:13,880 Speaker 1: quick break for word from our sponsor and we're back. 394 00:24:13,880 --> 00:24:17,760 Speaker 1: Thank you sponsored again. From my my perspective of never 395 00:24:17,800 --> 00:24:20,240 Speaker 1: I never read it, I've never seen an adaption in 396 00:24:20,240 --> 00:24:25,000 Speaker 1: Samantha was kind of my like entry way into Lolita, 397 00:24:26,080 --> 00:24:30,360 Speaker 1: and uh, we were talking about it in terms of 398 00:24:30,800 --> 00:24:35,560 Speaker 1: that whole blaming the victim thing of of it being framed. 399 00:24:35,680 --> 00:24:41,320 Speaker 1: Is this love story and how how common we do 400 00:24:41,480 --> 00:24:45,760 Speaker 1: see that and not just Lolita, like that is everywhere 401 00:24:45,920 --> 00:24:49,080 Speaker 1: in our in our entertainment, in our culture, and so 402 00:24:49,320 --> 00:24:51,920 Speaker 1: I guess I'm kind of curious. I guess we're gonna 403 00:24:52,000 --> 00:24:56,840 Speaker 1: double question too. One like when people say it's their 404 00:24:57,160 --> 00:25:01,919 Speaker 1: favorite book, or when you Stanley Kuberck makes this adaption 405 00:25:03,119 --> 00:25:08,119 Speaker 1: and it's clearly missing the point, why do you think 406 00:25:08,200 --> 00:25:12,720 Speaker 1: that is? And then just on a larger scale, this 407 00:25:13,200 --> 00:25:19,840 Speaker 1: sexualization of young girls, Um, why does that? Kind of 408 00:25:19,840 --> 00:25:21,439 Speaker 1: know the answer, but I'd like to talk about it. 409 00:25:21,480 --> 00:25:23,440 Speaker 1: Why is it so prevalent? Like why do we see 410 00:25:23,480 --> 00:25:28,359 Speaker 1: that all over? In terms of I mean, I honestly, 411 00:25:29,480 --> 00:25:32,879 Speaker 1: I have never found an argument for someone saying that 412 00:25:32,920 --> 00:25:35,479 Speaker 1: one of the movie adaptations being one of their favorite 413 00:25:35,480 --> 00:25:40,760 Speaker 1: movies to be convincing, compelling, or like grounded in reality. 414 00:25:41,520 --> 00:25:44,399 Speaker 1: I think it's like a severe red flag if someone's 415 00:25:44,400 --> 00:25:49,119 Speaker 1: like Stanley Kubrick's Lolita to me is great film, Like 416 00:25:49,280 --> 00:25:53,240 Speaker 1: it's it's just not and it there's I feel like 417 00:25:53,240 --> 00:25:57,280 Speaker 1: there's just nothing really to be taken from the movie 418 00:25:57,280 --> 00:26:01,280 Speaker 1: adaptations other than very you know it, They're they're very 419 00:26:01,359 --> 00:26:04,840 Speaker 1: revealing about the views of the time they were released. 420 00:26:04,880 --> 00:26:07,960 Speaker 1: Into but if you don't want to know what in 421 00:26:08,000 --> 00:26:13,000 Speaker 1: which ways the Grand American culture was like willing to 422 00:26:13,040 --> 00:26:18,800 Speaker 1: accept victim blaming in either ninety two or there's nothing 423 00:26:18,880 --> 00:26:22,600 Speaker 1: for you there? And I mean, yeah, I've really really 424 00:26:22,640 --> 00:26:26,199 Speaker 1: disliked the movie adaptations and some of the stage adaptations 425 00:26:26,200 --> 00:26:29,720 Speaker 1: as well. It's just bad, bad, bad, bad bad. Uh. 426 00:26:29,760 --> 00:26:33,080 Speaker 1: In terms of the book, there there is, I mean, 427 00:26:33,119 --> 00:26:36,440 Speaker 1: it's just what what I've found is it's a very 428 00:26:36,680 --> 00:26:41,080 Speaker 1: personal reaction that everyone has with this book. I mean, 429 00:26:41,119 --> 00:26:44,960 Speaker 1: there's and what I'm more interested in is how survivors 430 00:26:44,960 --> 00:26:49,320 Speaker 1: of abuse feel about it, how um, you know, professionals 431 00:26:49,320 --> 00:26:51,960 Speaker 1: and the psychology field feel about it, and just kind 432 00:26:51,960 --> 00:26:54,760 Speaker 1: of getting to the bottom of Like this book definitely 433 00:26:54,840 --> 00:26:58,520 Speaker 1: really affected me enough that I'm making a podcast about 434 00:26:58,520 --> 00:27:03,760 Speaker 1: it fifteen years later. Um, and is it a worthwhile 435 00:27:03,920 --> 00:27:06,200 Speaker 1: text to even still kind of be out there and 436 00:27:06,520 --> 00:27:10,760 Speaker 1: reckoning with with that? And I've gotten I mean, there's 437 00:27:11,560 --> 00:27:13,840 Speaker 1: a lot of different answers and a lot of a 438 00:27:13,880 --> 00:27:17,000 Speaker 1: lot of perspectives I honestly wasn't even aware of existing, 439 00:27:17,080 --> 00:27:20,200 Speaker 1: but there are. There was an amazing piece in a 440 00:27:20,480 --> 00:27:23,920 Speaker 1: Modern Love column a couple of years ago that details 441 00:27:23,960 --> 00:27:28,520 Speaker 1: the experience of a survivor of child sexual abuse who 442 00:27:28,960 --> 00:27:32,320 Speaker 1: used the book, you know, used the character of Dolores 443 00:27:32,400 --> 00:27:36,760 Speaker 1: Hayes to kind of empower herself to report her abuser 444 00:27:36,920 --> 00:27:39,760 Speaker 1: to uh the authorities and to the police. And there's 445 00:27:40,160 --> 00:27:45,600 Speaker 1: there's been it's it's it gets so mired because this 446 00:27:45,680 --> 00:27:50,879 Speaker 1: book has been used so irresponsibly to empower the villain. 447 00:27:51,080 --> 00:27:54,040 Speaker 1: But there are also reads of it that you know, 448 00:27:54,160 --> 00:27:58,800 Speaker 1: victims of abuse have reclaimed it and really searched for 449 00:27:59,560 --> 00:28:03,240 Speaker 1: the abused child that is in the book's pages and 450 00:28:03,920 --> 00:28:06,879 Speaker 1: pull from that as kind of an argument that it 451 00:28:06,960 --> 00:28:10,040 Speaker 1: that it is still a very relevant text. And so 452 00:28:10,400 --> 00:28:14,960 Speaker 1: that's something that has been a whole journey for me 453 00:28:15,200 --> 00:28:18,680 Speaker 1: as well, and I've spoken with It's also kind of 454 00:28:18,880 --> 00:28:23,439 Speaker 1: a split view in the psychology field of like, you know, 455 00:28:23,600 --> 00:28:26,200 Speaker 1: whether we like it or not, this is still a 456 00:28:26,400 --> 00:28:31,679 Speaker 1: very you know, potent text that is very present, and 457 00:28:32,200 --> 00:28:35,320 Speaker 1: it's like figuring out it's there, So how are we 458 00:28:35,320 --> 00:28:36,639 Speaker 1: going to deal with it? What are we gonna do 459 00:28:36,680 --> 00:28:39,920 Speaker 1: with it? And how can we kind of stop the 460 00:28:40,480 --> 00:28:44,200 Speaker 1: messaging that exists around it and at least, you know, 461 00:28:44,280 --> 00:28:48,440 Speaker 1: turn the discussion to something productive that doesn't serve to 462 00:28:48,480 --> 00:28:52,480 Speaker 1: further harm people and talking with child psychologists has has 463 00:28:52,480 --> 00:28:56,200 Speaker 1: been interesting in that regard too, because there's you know, 464 00:28:56,880 --> 00:29:01,520 Speaker 1: the read where it's empowering the villain and it's empowering 465 00:29:01,960 --> 00:29:04,880 Speaker 1: abusers of the highest degree. And then there's also the 466 00:29:04,920 --> 00:29:08,240 Speaker 1: read that I've spoken to several psychologists about saying that 467 00:29:08,760 --> 00:29:11,480 Speaker 1: they teach it to their psychology students in terms of 468 00:29:11,520 --> 00:29:15,720 Speaker 1: like this is how an abuser could think, and keeping 469 00:29:15,880 --> 00:29:19,480 Speaker 1: in mind with students like the fact that I don't know, 470 00:29:19,520 --> 00:29:22,760 Speaker 1: I feel like it's almost a different common cultural trope 471 00:29:23,000 --> 00:29:26,960 Speaker 1: that abusers are like a very particular way, and there 472 00:29:27,000 --> 00:29:30,280 Speaker 1: it's very rarely depicted as someone you know and someone 473 00:29:30,320 --> 00:29:33,840 Speaker 1: who is close to you, and that's who this protagonist is. 474 00:29:33,920 --> 00:29:38,320 Speaker 1: I mean, he does all of the classic grooming techniques. 475 00:29:38,720 --> 00:29:41,400 Speaker 1: He gets himself and he beds himself in the family. 476 00:29:41,600 --> 00:29:44,640 Speaker 1: He does all of these things that you know are 477 00:29:44,680 --> 00:29:49,160 Speaker 1: our emblematic of what many people have done in real life. 478 00:29:49,200 --> 00:29:51,680 Speaker 1: And I think why it it's so triggering for a 479 00:29:51,680 --> 00:29:53,760 Speaker 1: lot of people is because he's doing things that a 480 00:29:53,840 --> 00:29:57,440 Speaker 1: lot of people um have done and continue to do. 481 00:29:57,680 --> 00:30:03,560 Speaker 1: And so it's just it's so an individual experience in 482 00:30:03,680 --> 00:30:10,160 Speaker 1: terms of the book that from a survivor perspective. Every 483 00:30:10,200 --> 00:30:13,520 Speaker 1: reading is completely valid, and there's there's so many ways 484 00:30:13,600 --> 00:30:16,680 Speaker 1: to look at it, and it's been like just completely 485 00:30:17,240 --> 00:30:21,120 Speaker 1: mind bending to, um learn all these different perspectives on 486 00:30:21,120 --> 00:30:26,560 Speaker 1: on the same book. Yeah, this is actually I've been 487 00:30:26,600 --> 00:30:29,880 Speaker 1: thinking about this a lot lately because, um, when Samantha 488 00:30:29,920 --> 00:30:33,959 Speaker 1: first came on, we did a whole like twelve episode 489 00:30:34,000 --> 00:30:39,840 Speaker 1: series on trauma and specifically like sexual trauma, and as 490 00:30:39,840 --> 00:30:43,360 Speaker 1: a survivor myself, I only just got the courage to 491 00:30:43,680 --> 00:30:46,960 Speaker 1: admit on this show that I have written rape scenes 492 00:30:47,040 --> 00:30:51,200 Speaker 1: before and I've never published them and I probably never will, 493 00:30:51,240 --> 00:30:53,920 Speaker 1: and they're from you know, the survivor's point of view, 494 00:30:54,080 --> 00:30:59,280 Speaker 1: and they're uh, it feels weird to say because they're 495 00:30:59,280 --> 00:31:03,600 Speaker 1: not published, but they're not gratuitous or whatever. But it's 496 00:31:03,680 --> 00:31:08,120 Speaker 1: I have an anxiety around that, around like the juxtaposition 497 00:31:08,120 --> 00:31:11,040 Speaker 1: of entertainment of this horrific thing that is in fact 498 00:31:11,480 --> 00:31:14,560 Speaker 1: so often taken in the wrong way by our culture 499 00:31:15,360 --> 00:31:20,680 Speaker 1: and portrayed perhaps as victim blaming, and yeah, getting entertainment 500 00:31:20,680 --> 00:31:22,360 Speaker 1: from that. But at the same time, I do think 501 00:31:22,440 --> 00:31:28,000 Speaker 1: there's value in in those stories because they happen. They happen, 502 00:31:28,160 --> 00:31:31,360 Speaker 1: and and I just I don't know if you can 503 00:31:31,400 --> 00:31:34,040 Speaker 1: connect to that at all. This like anxiety between those 504 00:31:34,040 --> 00:31:36,520 Speaker 1: two things. And I think part of it is like 505 00:31:36,600 --> 00:31:39,400 Speaker 1: a careful telling from somebody who is a survivor from 506 00:31:39,440 --> 00:31:42,000 Speaker 1: their point of view and making scenery on them, and 507 00:31:42,040 --> 00:31:45,000 Speaker 1: that almost never happens in our entertainment are and how 508 00:31:45,040 --> 00:31:51,320 Speaker 1: people interpret our entertainment. Yeah, I don't Yeah, I'm I'm 509 00:31:51,400 --> 00:31:54,640 Speaker 1: coming to this story from a from a survivor perspective 510 00:31:54,880 --> 00:31:58,400 Speaker 1: as well, and it I don't know. I mean, it's 511 00:31:58,840 --> 00:32:01,920 Speaker 1: part of what I've I've been trying to do. Is she, 512 00:32:02,200 --> 00:32:06,120 Speaker 1: you know, the the victim is really difficult to find 513 00:32:06,680 --> 00:32:09,760 Speaker 1: in the pages of this book, and that's a lot 514 00:32:09,840 --> 00:32:13,960 Speaker 1: of the issues. I think of the common common bad 515 00:32:14,040 --> 00:32:17,440 Speaker 1: reads of this book is that if you're not trained 516 00:32:17,480 --> 00:32:20,800 Speaker 1: to look for her, then it's really difficult to find her. 517 00:32:20,880 --> 00:32:23,600 Speaker 1: I do think that she's in there, but you know, 518 00:32:23,720 --> 00:32:27,520 Speaker 1: even the title of the book is creating distance between 519 00:32:27,600 --> 00:32:30,720 Speaker 1: you and the victim because Lolita is not her actual name. 520 00:32:30,840 --> 00:32:34,000 Speaker 1: Her actual name is Dolores. Lolita is kind of this 521 00:32:34,560 --> 00:32:39,400 Speaker 1: um fantasy that a sex abuser is projecting onto her 522 00:32:39,520 --> 00:32:43,840 Speaker 1: and taking advantage of. But when you hear about Dolores. 523 00:32:44,360 --> 00:32:46,920 Speaker 1: You're like, you have to constantly remind yourself, this is 524 00:32:46,920 --> 00:32:50,640 Speaker 1: a twelve year old girl. And when you're hearing about Dolores, 525 00:32:50,680 --> 00:32:54,400 Speaker 1: you're hearing about a normal kid who is caught in 526 00:32:55,240 --> 00:33:00,280 Speaker 1: the most horrifying ordeal that anyone can be caught. And 527 00:33:01,320 --> 00:33:03,600 Speaker 1: I totally agree with you, like, there need to be 528 00:33:03,720 --> 00:33:08,920 Speaker 1: more narratives that are centered on victims and survivors or 529 00:33:09,120 --> 00:33:13,640 Speaker 1: or however you're referring to to it um because the 530 00:33:13,680 --> 00:33:16,880 Speaker 1: fact that there isn't is kind of why I think 531 00:33:17,320 --> 00:33:19,800 Speaker 1: bad reads of books like Lolita are able to be 532 00:33:19,840 --> 00:33:25,280 Speaker 1: perpetuated so much is because there's no no popular media 533 00:33:25,480 --> 00:33:29,520 Speaker 1: that you know, shows the other, the other side of 534 00:33:29,520 --> 00:33:33,920 Speaker 1: that situation. So if you're like some you know, English 535 00:33:34,040 --> 00:33:37,680 Speaker 1: one oh one dweeb who just wants to bandwagon and 536 00:33:37,760 --> 00:33:40,440 Speaker 1: be like it's the greatest book ever and you're not 537 00:33:40,520 --> 00:33:44,320 Speaker 1: actually reading it, you know, what do you have to 538 00:33:44,360 --> 00:33:47,320 Speaker 1: compare it to? And and there's it's not to say 539 00:33:47,320 --> 00:33:49,960 Speaker 1: that those narratives don't exist, but they don't exist in 540 00:33:50,160 --> 00:33:56,600 Speaker 1: the gigantic, you know, predator centered perspective like Lolita is. 541 00:33:56,760 --> 00:34:00,640 Speaker 1: And that I mean we could go into like great 542 00:34:00,640 --> 00:34:03,840 Speaker 1: writers of like quote unquote great writers of the literary canon. 543 00:34:03,880 --> 00:34:06,600 Speaker 1: Who is granted that title and who isn't and and 544 00:34:07,600 --> 00:34:09,319 Speaker 1: you know, we could go and go and go on that, 545 00:34:09,360 --> 00:34:12,200 Speaker 1: but yeah, I think that part of the reason people 546 00:34:13,160 --> 00:34:19,360 Speaker 1: misread and fixate on predators centered narratives is because they 547 00:34:19,800 --> 00:34:26,200 Speaker 1: haven't sought out the other perspective, which is extremely dangerous. Yeah, 548 00:34:26,400 --> 00:34:28,799 Speaker 1: you know, that kind of brings me back to any 549 00:34:28,840 --> 00:34:32,720 Speaker 1: and I were talking about Cutie's the Netflix movie that lost. 550 00:34:32,760 --> 00:34:34,839 Speaker 1: Everybody lost their heads on, like like, oh my god, 551 00:34:34,880 --> 00:34:37,040 Speaker 1: this is all about pedophilia and they're trying to groom 552 00:34:37,080 --> 00:34:40,280 Speaker 1: these kids. But in actuality, the storytelling was the opposite 553 00:34:40,280 --> 00:34:42,560 Speaker 1: of that, talking about girls growing up too quickly in 554 00:34:42,600 --> 00:34:45,279 Speaker 1: a world of social media and all of that. Do 555 00:34:45,320 --> 00:34:49,440 Speaker 1: you think that this stories, like people's translation of stories 556 00:34:49,680 --> 00:34:53,279 Speaker 1: like Lolita, that causes people to automatically react without even 557 00:34:53,360 --> 00:34:56,200 Speaker 1: knowing to allow for that perspective to be showed That 558 00:34:56,280 --> 00:34:58,200 Speaker 1: other side of this is the horrific side. This is 559 00:34:58,239 --> 00:35:00,640 Speaker 1: the growing up side that we needed talk about, but 560 00:35:00,719 --> 00:35:05,680 Speaker 1: we can't because we're already fixated on the dirtiness. I 561 00:35:05,680 --> 00:35:09,839 Speaker 1: guess for all intendent purposes of things like Lolita and 562 00:35:09,880 --> 00:35:14,960 Speaker 1: the cultural aspects that Stanley Kubrick did with Lolita. Yeah, 563 00:35:15,000 --> 00:35:17,279 Speaker 1: I mean I think that that definitely factors in. I 564 00:35:17,360 --> 00:35:19,560 Speaker 1: still haven't seen Cuties, so I can't speak to that 565 00:35:19,600 --> 00:35:26,320 Speaker 1: movie specifically, but um, but yeah, I that totally tracks 566 00:35:26,440 --> 00:35:30,359 Speaker 1: for for me is the fact that this is like, 567 00:35:31,400 --> 00:35:34,160 Speaker 1: it just constantly blows my mind that there is such 568 00:35:34,280 --> 00:35:39,920 Speaker 1: a gigantic cultural taboo still around talking about surviving abuse 569 00:35:40,480 --> 00:35:43,719 Speaker 1: of this kind of as particularly as a child. But 570 00:35:43,840 --> 00:35:48,919 Speaker 1: there's absolutely no cultural taboo and in fact, like encouragement 571 00:35:49,280 --> 00:35:54,600 Speaker 1: to sexualize young people like it. It's a recipe for 572 00:35:54,840 --> 00:36:00,319 Speaker 1: absolute disaster. And so, yeah, I haven't seen I haven't 573 00:36:00,320 --> 00:36:04,160 Speaker 1: seen Cuties, but it just based on the conversations I've 574 00:36:04,200 --> 00:36:07,200 Speaker 1: been having and my my views are constantly kind of 575 00:36:07,280 --> 00:36:13,200 Speaker 1: changing and evolving, and this has been such a journey. Um. 576 00:36:13,239 --> 00:36:16,560 Speaker 1: But you know, it seems like there there hasn't been 577 00:36:16,640 --> 00:36:20,719 Speaker 1: much of a productive cultural discussion about sex abuse of 578 00:36:20,800 --> 00:36:23,200 Speaker 1: children because it makes people tense up, It makes them 579 00:36:23,239 --> 00:36:27,960 Speaker 1: uncomfortable to think about. It's an uncomfortable reality. But you 580 00:36:28,000 --> 00:36:31,319 Speaker 1: can't you can't refuse to have that discussion and be 581 00:36:31,400 --> 00:36:36,680 Speaker 1: completely complicit in the sexualization of you know, young people 582 00:36:36,719 --> 00:36:41,520 Speaker 1: in media. It's just it's a guarantee that abuses going 583 00:36:41,600 --> 00:36:47,280 Speaker 1: to continue unchallenged if if both of those things are true. Um, 584 00:36:47,320 --> 00:36:49,360 Speaker 1: and I'm going to try to figure out how to 585 00:36:49,680 --> 00:36:52,600 Speaker 1: phrase this question because we talked about Q and on 586 00:36:52,760 --> 00:36:56,239 Speaker 1: before and of course Pizza Gate and all of these 587 00:36:56,239 --> 00:37:02,520 Speaker 1: things which they do make abuse seem like it's obviously 588 00:37:02,600 --> 00:37:05,160 Speaker 1: monsters in the in the closet, you know, in the 589 00:37:05,160 --> 00:37:08,759 Speaker 1: the strangers in the in the was waiting to kidnap you, 590 00:37:08,840 --> 00:37:11,040 Speaker 1: and all of these things in the van instead of 591 00:37:11,160 --> 00:37:14,720 Speaker 1: realizing that a lot of the times that the abuses 592 00:37:14,800 --> 00:37:17,640 Speaker 1: happens with people closer, like the story that is being 593 00:37:17,680 --> 00:37:22,080 Speaker 1: told in Lolita. Uh, I'm trying to think the connection, 594 00:37:22,160 --> 00:37:25,400 Speaker 1: the disconnect between people because I I've definitely seen people 595 00:37:25,680 --> 00:37:29,360 Speaker 1: uh giving leeway at Welsh. We can talk about the 596 00:37:29,400 --> 00:37:32,520 Speaker 1: Trump administration right now, as when we talk about Weinstein 597 00:37:32,960 --> 00:37:36,400 Speaker 1: and versus also Epstein, but how they are giving passes 598 00:37:36,480 --> 00:37:41,000 Speaker 1: to certain people who are obviously being implicated because they 599 00:37:41,040 --> 00:37:42,640 Speaker 1: want to see them as heroes and they want to 600 00:37:42,680 --> 00:37:45,040 Speaker 1: see them as good guys. And it kind of happens 601 00:37:45,400 --> 00:37:48,560 Speaker 1: with like the translation of that book for some people 602 00:37:48,640 --> 00:37:52,000 Speaker 1: where you know, Humbert is a poor victim who just 603 00:37:52,080 --> 00:37:55,319 Speaker 1: fell in love with the wrong person kind of thing, 604 00:37:55,440 --> 00:37:57,799 Speaker 1: like do you see a correlation? Do you have like 605 00:37:57,800 --> 00:38:01,640 Speaker 1: like a better take that or then I'm trying to 606 00:38:01,680 --> 00:38:05,520 Speaker 1: express No, No, I totally, I totally hear what you're saying. 607 00:38:05,520 --> 00:38:09,760 Speaker 1: I It's the tricky part is like I it's I. 608 00:38:09,760 --> 00:38:13,400 Speaker 1: I agree that that's true. And then the question is, 609 00:38:13,440 --> 00:38:18,040 Speaker 1: like what is the solution to that? Because it's there 610 00:38:18,040 --> 00:38:24,120 Speaker 1: does seem to be this, especially in very radicalized communities 611 00:38:24,160 --> 00:38:28,080 Speaker 1: like Q and on and of like who can condemn 612 00:38:28,360 --> 00:38:34,640 Speaker 1: child sexual abuse the loudest versus like, yes, we absolutely 613 00:38:34,680 --> 00:38:37,439 Speaker 1: should be condemning this, but also like let's critically think 614 00:38:37,480 --> 00:38:40,680 Speaker 1: about and then what you can't just say you know? 615 00:38:40,800 --> 00:38:44,160 Speaker 1: And and and also like you're describing creating distance between 616 00:38:44,920 --> 00:38:48,640 Speaker 1: the most you know, common abusers are people that you 617 00:38:48,719 --> 00:38:52,200 Speaker 1: know already, and so I think that it is a 618 00:38:52,280 --> 00:38:56,320 Speaker 1: very common like the the way that people gave popular 619 00:38:56,400 --> 00:39:02,960 Speaker 1: media figures like Epstein, like Weinstein. I just finished a 620 00:39:03,000 --> 00:39:08,759 Speaker 1: long rehash of Charlie Chaplin, who was just like a 621 00:39:08,920 --> 00:39:11,880 Speaker 1: serial abuser was brought to court multiple times at the 622 00:39:11,920 --> 00:39:15,719 Speaker 1: height of his fame, and no one cared because it 623 00:39:15,840 --> 00:39:18,200 Speaker 1: was not a discussion that was had it was taboo, 624 00:39:18,280 --> 00:39:23,239 Speaker 1: and it was easier to blame the victim than to, 625 00:39:23,960 --> 00:39:27,440 Speaker 1: you know, accept the fact that the most famous movie 626 00:39:27,480 --> 00:39:31,800 Speaker 1: star in the world was sexually abusing girls for years. 627 00:39:32,200 --> 00:39:38,560 Speaker 1: And it's yeah, I mean, it's I'm it feels like 628 00:39:38,560 --> 00:39:42,080 Speaker 1: a miracle that we are, like, it's a popular discussion 629 00:39:42,160 --> 00:39:45,440 Speaker 1: to be having now, but it's still like, we need 630 00:39:45,520 --> 00:39:49,279 Speaker 1: more results. I'm glad that discussions are happening, but the 631 00:39:49,360 --> 00:39:52,920 Speaker 1: results aren't there yet. And that's why I hope, I 632 00:39:52,960 --> 00:39:56,919 Speaker 1: hope if if anyone gets anything out of this podcast, 633 00:39:57,080 --> 00:40:01,520 Speaker 1: it's just kind of analyzing and the deepest level I 634 00:40:01,560 --> 00:40:06,920 Speaker 1: can how this clear cut predator who you're told on 635 00:40:07,080 --> 00:40:10,239 Speaker 1: page one of the source material is a predator and 636 00:40:10,440 --> 00:40:14,800 Speaker 1: does not deserve your sympathy. How has he just gotten 637 00:40:14,800 --> 00:40:16,520 Speaker 1: away with it and away with it and away with 638 00:40:16,560 --> 00:40:20,400 Speaker 1: it and it's almost seventy years later and a large 639 00:40:20,480 --> 00:40:23,480 Speaker 1: swath of readers are still letting him get away with it. 640 00:40:23,560 --> 00:40:27,360 Speaker 1: How does that happen? And how many levels of complicit 641 00:40:27,440 --> 00:40:29,719 Speaker 1: does a culture have to be in order for that 642 00:40:29,840 --> 00:40:33,720 Speaker 1: to happen. We have a little bit more for you listeners, 643 00:40:33,760 --> 00:40:35,600 Speaker 1: but first we have one more quick break for work 644 00:40:35,600 --> 00:40:52,879 Speaker 1: from our sponsor and her back, Vicky stored, I think 645 00:40:52,920 --> 00:40:56,600 Speaker 1: you did a great job with bringing in uh samples 646 00:40:56,680 --> 00:41:01,520 Speaker 1: of different twelve year old girls, uh, actually having a 647 00:41:01,600 --> 00:41:04,120 Speaker 1: snippets of the interviewed and what they actually sound like, 648 00:41:04,160 --> 00:41:06,239 Speaker 1: to remind this is what twelve year old is. It's 649 00:41:06,320 --> 00:41:10,080 Speaker 1: not this uh like, it's not this TV show eighteen 650 00:41:10,160 --> 00:41:11,879 Speaker 1: year old playing a twelve year old. It is a 651 00:41:12,000 --> 00:41:16,359 Speaker 1: literal child having a conversation about being excited about her 652 00:41:16,400 --> 00:41:19,040 Speaker 1: brand new toy or brand new phone or whatever what not. 653 00:41:19,719 --> 00:41:22,440 Speaker 1: And I thought he did an amazing job and making 654 00:41:22,520 --> 00:41:24,680 Speaker 1: that a reminder, but it also still like it was 655 00:41:24,719 --> 00:41:28,560 Speaker 1: so disappointing to see and the two that I remember specifically, 656 00:41:28,560 --> 00:41:30,600 Speaker 1: it was like men say, you know, you can just 657 00:41:30,640 --> 00:41:33,160 Speaker 1: love a book for how beautiful it's written, just because 658 00:41:33,160 --> 00:41:35,239 Speaker 1: it's about the subject doesn't mean you should hate on it. 659 00:41:35,360 --> 00:41:40,520 Speaker 1: Like it's so like the literary bro is like, don't 660 00:41:40,600 --> 00:41:43,640 Speaker 1: be a hater. I'm like, I just don't have the 661 00:41:43,840 --> 00:41:49,000 Speaker 1: point is to be a hater. You like, Oh, it's 662 00:41:49,040 --> 00:41:53,800 Speaker 1: it's it's infuriating actually like and having and I'm still 663 00:41:53,840 --> 00:42:01,920 Speaker 1: like really just like aggravated and just completely like confused 664 00:42:01,960 --> 00:42:05,560 Speaker 1: as to why my favorite children's author recommended this book 665 00:42:05,600 --> 00:42:09,399 Speaker 1: to children, like why would you do that? And this 666 00:42:09,480 --> 00:42:12,160 Speaker 1: was in you know, two thousand four, two thousand five, 667 00:42:12,320 --> 00:42:15,839 Speaker 1: This was like not that long ago. It's still such 668 00:42:15,880 --> 00:42:22,120 Speaker 1: a normalized thing to do, and it like, I just, yeah, 669 00:42:22,280 --> 00:42:23,920 Speaker 1: I want to talk to as many people about it 670 00:42:23,960 --> 00:42:26,719 Speaker 1: as possible because I just feel like if the conversation 671 00:42:26,760 --> 00:42:31,280 Speaker 1: hasn't had, it's just going to keep stalling and and 672 00:42:31,400 --> 00:42:36,120 Speaker 1: so oh it's so frustrating. Yeah, that the literary bro perspective. 673 00:42:36,239 --> 00:42:40,840 Speaker 1: There's a really good Rebecca so Sulman essay. Uh in, 674 00:42:41,000 --> 00:42:43,319 Speaker 1: I think it's in the Men Explained Things to Me 675 00:42:43,480 --> 00:42:45,960 Speaker 1: as a collection, but it's Men Explained Well Lada to Me, 676 00:42:46,040 --> 00:42:50,000 Speaker 1: and it details that exact thing. And then also what 677 00:42:50,040 --> 00:42:52,520 Speaker 1: we were talking about of like you know, kind of 678 00:42:52,680 --> 00:42:56,120 Speaker 1: literary bros playing Devil's advocate and being like, well, you know, 679 00:42:56,160 --> 00:42:59,880 Speaker 1: if someone wrote a book this beautiful from a victim's perspective, 680 00:43:00,000 --> 00:43:01,920 Speaker 1: I would also love it. And then she's like, okay, 681 00:43:01,960 --> 00:43:07,239 Speaker 1: but where is that book? Like let's get that book? 682 00:43:07,680 --> 00:43:12,200 Speaker 1: And you know, sis, male readers are not constantly confronted 683 00:43:12,760 --> 00:43:16,600 Speaker 1: with depictions of potentially their own abuse, and they're not 684 00:43:16,680 --> 00:43:19,440 Speaker 1: really faced with that kind of triggered the way that 685 00:43:19,480 --> 00:43:22,760 Speaker 1: a lot of readers of Lolita are being actively triggered, 686 00:43:22,800 --> 00:43:28,480 Speaker 1: and it's just the refusal to engage from literary bros. 687 00:43:28,600 --> 00:43:34,160 Speaker 1: I just I just can't write. It's really it was 688 00:43:34,200 --> 00:43:36,000 Speaker 1: the whole thing. I was like, why, why, why are 689 00:43:36,000 --> 00:43:42,040 Speaker 1: you even comments some comment like I really like or 690 00:43:42,080 --> 00:43:45,839 Speaker 1: even yeah, there's like people that kind of misunderstood before 691 00:43:45,880 --> 00:43:48,680 Speaker 1: the show started coming out, people who like misunderstood what 692 00:43:48,840 --> 00:43:51,280 Speaker 1: I was trying to do with the show, and they're like, yeah, 693 00:43:51,480 --> 00:43:53,879 Speaker 1: finally I want someone to say like it's a good 694 00:43:53,880 --> 00:43:58,239 Speaker 1: book and I shouldn't feel bad, And it's like you 695 00:43:58,360 --> 00:44:01,040 Speaker 1: have to. You have to use your brain. You have 696 00:44:01,200 --> 00:44:03,680 Speaker 1: to use your brain. It's the rule you gotta. I 697 00:44:03,719 --> 00:44:06,319 Speaker 1: will say, I was a little like my whole like 698 00:44:06,400 --> 00:44:08,719 Speaker 1: a little bit of oh no. It was because I've 699 00:44:08,719 --> 00:44:10,840 Speaker 1: had so many people justified me why it's such a 700 00:44:10,880 --> 00:44:13,279 Speaker 1: great book. Uh, Like I was talking about the t 701 00:44:13,400 --> 00:44:15,319 Speaker 1: eight was a woman who told me how great this 702 00:44:15,440 --> 00:44:16,759 Speaker 1: was and that it was a love story that I 703 00:44:16,840 --> 00:44:19,200 Speaker 1: was so fearful. I'm like, oh God, we can't do this, 704 00:44:19,280 --> 00:44:22,759 Speaker 1: Like I got automatically got I'm like, make sure we're 705 00:44:22,760 --> 00:44:25,200 Speaker 1: all on the same page moment, because I definitely had 706 00:44:25,200 --> 00:44:27,080 Speaker 1: those moments, but I didn't want to ask you because 707 00:44:27,239 --> 00:44:29,560 Speaker 1: I think this is a social worker case worker in me. 708 00:44:29,800 --> 00:44:32,799 Speaker 1: When you read it as that child, what like, what 709 00:44:32,840 --> 00:44:34,440 Speaker 1: made you say that was your favorite book? Was it 710 00:44:34,480 --> 00:44:36,520 Speaker 1: because you were told it was supposed to be a 711 00:44:36,520 --> 00:44:38,359 Speaker 1: good book or was there something in it that made 712 00:44:38,360 --> 00:44:41,759 Speaker 1: you feel like, oh, this is why it's a good book. Uh. 713 00:44:41,880 --> 00:44:44,400 Speaker 1: When I was a kid, it was. It was a 714 00:44:44,560 --> 00:44:46,720 Speaker 1: very all over the place read. I first, I didn't 715 00:44:46,760 --> 00:44:52,000 Speaker 1: fully understand it. I was, um, it was almost like 716 00:44:52,080 --> 00:44:54,520 Speaker 1: I wanted to I wanted my favorite book to be 717 00:44:55,000 --> 00:44:58,239 Speaker 1: my favorite author's favorite book. Um. And so I was 718 00:44:58,320 --> 00:45:00,799 Speaker 1: going into it thinking I was like, well, like, if 719 00:45:00,800 --> 00:45:02,960 Speaker 1: this is lemony Seconds favorite book, there must be like 720 00:45:03,360 --> 00:45:05,759 Speaker 1: it must be like this awesome book and I love it. 721 00:45:05,840 --> 00:45:08,480 Speaker 1: And so that was where I was starting with it. 722 00:45:08,560 --> 00:45:13,680 Speaker 1: And then I think because I didn't have the literary 723 00:45:13,800 --> 00:45:21,400 Speaker 1: tools at eleven to to fully understand the abuse taking place, 724 00:45:21,840 --> 00:45:24,680 Speaker 1: I was coming from a place of like what had 725 00:45:24,719 --> 00:45:27,680 Speaker 1: I experienced and what was I seeing in my life 726 00:45:27,719 --> 00:45:31,200 Speaker 1: around this time? And what I was seeing in media 727 00:45:31,280 --> 00:45:35,120 Speaker 1: and just like around me was a lot of excusing 728 00:45:35,120 --> 00:45:38,640 Speaker 1: of this behavior. And so you're almost like I was like, oh, 729 00:45:38,760 --> 00:45:44,000 Speaker 1: that her suffering is I I thought as a kid, 730 00:45:44,320 --> 00:45:47,160 Speaker 1: which like makes me so sad to think about now, 731 00:45:47,320 --> 00:45:51,799 Speaker 1: is like having it presented that her suffering was somehow justified. 732 00:45:52,160 --> 00:45:55,839 Speaker 1: I was trying to be on board with that as 733 00:45:56,239 --> 00:45:58,640 Speaker 1: a kid, which is just like the it makes me 734 00:45:58,719 --> 00:46:01,400 Speaker 1: so sad and I just want to give her ug 735 00:46:01,600 --> 00:46:04,160 Speaker 1: and you know, kind of I've talked with a lot 736 00:46:04,200 --> 00:46:06,880 Speaker 1: of people about kind of like forgiving your past self 737 00:46:06,960 --> 00:46:09,560 Speaker 1: for how you first read this book, because I totally 738 00:46:09,600 --> 00:46:12,839 Speaker 1: misread it. I didn't understand it. I you know, I 739 00:46:12,880 --> 00:46:15,000 Speaker 1: read on the cover that it was a love story. 740 00:46:15,280 --> 00:46:17,280 Speaker 1: It was my favorite author's book, and so I'm like, okay, 741 00:46:17,320 --> 00:46:19,840 Speaker 1: that's what I'm going in on. And you know, even 742 00:46:20,000 --> 00:46:23,560 Speaker 1: the you know, people in my life and the teachers 743 00:46:23,600 --> 00:46:28,080 Speaker 1: around you know it. It was an entire culture and 744 00:46:28,640 --> 00:46:33,359 Speaker 1: environment that wouldn't have encouraged me to look at things 745 00:46:33,360 --> 00:46:37,480 Speaker 1: from Lolita's perspective. Um, And so I think that that 746 00:46:37,680 --> 00:46:41,879 Speaker 1: is why it really upset me looking back, of like, 747 00:46:42,760 --> 00:46:45,600 Speaker 1: no one told me, the only no one had a 748 00:46:45,640 --> 00:46:48,800 Speaker 1: discussion with me about it. The only thing that happened 749 00:46:48,840 --> 00:46:52,239 Speaker 1: is someone took the book away and then and then 750 00:46:52,280 --> 00:46:54,920 Speaker 1: I never and then we never talked about it, and 751 00:46:54,920 --> 00:46:58,439 Speaker 1: and a lot and I, you know, I along with 752 00:46:58,960 --> 00:47:03,200 Speaker 1: everything else, I I think I really internalized something harmful 753 00:47:03,600 --> 00:47:09,000 Speaker 1: that encouraged me to blame abuse on myself. Um. And 754 00:47:09,040 --> 00:47:12,080 Speaker 1: I wish I had had. I just wish I had 755 00:47:12,080 --> 00:47:14,279 Speaker 1: had to talk about it. And I wish because I 756 00:47:14,840 --> 00:47:19,000 Speaker 1: think that there is a version of you know, me 757 00:47:19,080 --> 00:47:21,239 Speaker 1: getting my hands on that back too early, that if 758 00:47:21,239 --> 00:47:24,120 Speaker 1: I had had a talk with an adult that I trusted, 759 00:47:25,000 --> 00:47:28,080 Speaker 1: I could have actually you know, taking it in a 760 00:47:28,080 --> 00:47:30,719 Speaker 1: little a little better if like, no, you this is 761 00:47:31,000 --> 00:47:34,480 Speaker 1: you know, almost this cautionary tale, like don't fall for 762 00:47:35,440 --> 00:47:37,960 Speaker 1: someone who treats you this way and talks to you 763 00:47:38,000 --> 00:47:41,840 Speaker 1: this way. It's there not to be trusted. They're a criminal. Um. 764 00:47:41,880 --> 00:47:43,640 Speaker 1: But that wasn't how I read it, and I didn't 765 00:47:43,680 --> 00:47:47,239 Speaker 1: really have anyone that I could talk to about it, 766 00:47:47,280 --> 00:47:49,360 Speaker 1: and so I ended up just kind of taking away 767 00:47:49,400 --> 00:47:54,040 Speaker 1: the wrong message and still being like mad about it 768 00:47:54,120 --> 00:47:57,839 Speaker 1: fifteen years later. And so here, you know, here I am. 769 00:47:57,880 --> 00:48:00,480 Speaker 1: I mean that's rightly, So you're not the only one 770 00:48:00,680 --> 00:48:04,520 Speaker 1: obviously that has taken it to this level as well. 771 00:48:04,560 --> 00:48:06,520 Speaker 1: Like it also, I think one of the things that 772 00:48:06,600 --> 00:48:09,360 Speaker 1: really frustrated me about this book, even though you're looking 773 00:48:09,400 --> 00:48:12,120 Speaker 1: at again the perspective and I'm again I love that 774 00:48:12,160 --> 00:48:15,040 Speaker 1: you actually say that, because I went away from that. 775 00:48:15,239 --> 00:48:18,960 Speaker 1: But it really does have this language where she is 776 00:48:19,160 --> 00:48:21,359 Speaker 1: a the temptress and she knows what's going on and 777 00:48:21,400 --> 00:48:23,840 Speaker 1: she's doing this too, and she's complicit, which is absolutely 778 00:48:23,880 --> 00:48:27,160 Speaker 1: false and it's absolutely within this mind. And I agree 779 00:48:27,200 --> 00:48:29,680 Speaker 1: with the psychiatrist and the child psychologists which I'm not 780 00:48:29,719 --> 00:48:33,160 Speaker 1: a professional that way, and that it does help you, 781 00:48:33,560 --> 00:48:35,879 Speaker 1: Like I remember thinking this like, this is the mind 782 00:48:35,920 --> 00:48:39,439 Speaker 1: of a pedophile. This is someone who truly justifies their 783 00:48:39,520 --> 00:48:42,319 Speaker 1: love and abuse of children because they think, as long 784 00:48:42,360 --> 00:48:44,799 Speaker 1: as I'm not hitting them, I'm not hurting them, I'm 785 00:48:44,800 --> 00:48:48,560 Speaker 1: not making them constantly cry type of thing. This is love. Uh, 786 00:48:48,600 --> 00:48:55,600 Speaker 1: And it's got exactly yeah, that's that's exactly like And 787 00:48:56,280 --> 00:48:59,120 Speaker 1: you know it's now that i'm and it's interesting, like 788 00:48:59,160 --> 00:49:01,319 Speaker 1: I've talked too who have read the book, you know, 789 00:49:01,600 --> 00:49:04,359 Speaker 1: as a kid, as a college student and then as 790 00:49:04,360 --> 00:49:09,280 Speaker 1: a mother plugging themselves into um, you know, Dolores's mother's 791 00:49:09,560 --> 00:49:12,960 Speaker 1: role because she gets I mean to say the least, 792 00:49:13,000 --> 00:49:15,400 Speaker 1: an extremely raw deal out of this story as well, 793 00:49:15,440 --> 00:49:19,200 Speaker 1: and it's always kind of squarely. You know, there's a 794 00:49:19,239 --> 00:49:22,320 Speaker 1: lot of different views on her, but I think people 795 00:49:22,400 --> 00:49:25,600 Speaker 1: also lose the narrative that, like, you know, Humbert is 796 00:49:25,640 --> 00:49:28,080 Speaker 1: also shaping your perspective of her. He makes her out 797 00:49:28,120 --> 00:49:31,799 Speaker 1: to be this cruel person, this nag who hates her daughter, 798 00:49:31,840 --> 00:49:35,120 Speaker 1: who can't stand her, when it seems like she is 799 00:49:35,160 --> 00:49:37,359 Speaker 1: a mother, a single mother of a twelve year old, 800 00:49:37,560 --> 00:49:41,319 Speaker 1: and they argue like that that was me and my 801 00:49:41,400 --> 00:49:45,240 Speaker 1: mom and she was not a you know, horrific monster. 802 00:49:45,320 --> 00:49:47,759 Speaker 1: But then you're like, well, who is shaping your perspective here? 803 00:49:47,840 --> 00:49:53,880 Speaker 1: Who benefits from you thinking that this woman was expendable 804 00:49:53,920 --> 00:49:57,280 Speaker 1: and in fact bad for the person that he wanted 805 00:49:57,320 --> 00:50:03,400 Speaker 1: to abuse. So there's so it's just it's it's so much, 806 00:50:03,560 --> 00:50:06,800 Speaker 1: and I feel like it's just this very like central 807 00:50:06,920 --> 00:50:12,040 Speaker 1: example of a lot of bigger cultural issues, and it's 808 00:50:12,080 --> 00:50:14,279 Speaker 1: not going away. This is the other thing is like, 809 00:50:14,560 --> 00:50:17,239 Speaker 1: if I thought that there was any hope that this 810 00:50:17,280 --> 00:50:20,719 Speaker 1: story would kind of fade away, um and and be 811 00:50:20,840 --> 00:50:23,200 Speaker 1: kind of have its place taken, then I wouldn't have 812 00:50:23,239 --> 00:50:25,880 Speaker 1: even done the project. But it's it's still so present 813 00:50:26,320 --> 00:50:30,080 Speaker 1: that um, yeah, it is. I mean it's it's kind 814 00:50:30,120 --> 00:50:33,080 Speaker 1: of frustrating, I feel again, that's all. I'm like, hell fire, 815 00:50:33,080 --> 00:50:35,640 Speaker 1: I tried this book instead, Like I don't really really 816 00:50:35,680 --> 00:50:39,239 Speaker 1: want to change that too. But yeah, I think you 817 00:50:39,320 --> 00:50:41,640 Speaker 1: are absolutely correct. And when you were talking about being 818 00:50:41,680 --> 00:50:44,680 Speaker 1: a child not understanding what this is and having this 819 00:50:45,120 --> 00:50:49,040 Speaker 1: level again, this is kind of underhanded grooming from the 820 00:50:49,080 --> 00:50:53,719 Speaker 1: author and himself sure and being like this is no, 821 00:50:53,880 --> 00:50:57,560 Speaker 1: this is the greatest book ever, and trying to having 822 00:50:57,560 --> 00:51:00,000 Speaker 1: this Maybe he doesn't understand. I don't know, I will. 823 00:51:00,080 --> 00:51:02,120 Speaker 1: I won't say I know for sure, But like this 824 00:51:02,280 --> 00:51:07,000 Speaker 1: influence of saying this and and bringing out this cultural 825 00:51:07,040 --> 00:51:10,720 Speaker 1: idea that this is the ultimate love story and therefore 826 00:51:10,760 --> 00:51:12,479 Speaker 1: we should all be accepting of this. And we see 827 00:51:12,520 --> 00:51:16,520 Speaker 1: this constantly, whether it's celebrities continue to date barely eighteen 828 00:51:16,520 --> 00:51:19,480 Speaker 1: twenty year olds and justifying it and saying it's okay, 829 00:51:19,880 --> 00:51:23,040 Speaker 1: um because you know they're adult enough, and and justifying 830 00:51:23,200 --> 00:51:25,839 Speaker 1: a woman a girl's actions by saying she's older than 831 00:51:25,960 --> 00:51:29,560 Speaker 1: she seems, which is again a constant narrative, and and 832 00:51:29,600 --> 00:51:32,520 Speaker 1: being a child wanting to be seen that way like that, 833 00:51:32,719 --> 00:51:39,040 Speaker 1: it feeds all into perspective. It's it's, it's it yeah, 834 00:51:39,120 --> 00:51:42,160 Speaker 1: And then on top of that, it's sorry, I could 835 00:51:42,160 --> 00:51:45,439 Speaker 1: like talk about this wherever it's like on my mind, 836 00:51:46,960 --> 00:51:50,759 Speaker 1: but um yeah, I mean even speaking with with um 837 00:51:51,400 --> 00:51:55,120 Speaker 1: child psychologists as well as a perspective, I I was like, oh, 838 00:51:55,239 --> 00:51:57,399 Speaker 1: I think that this is like something I needed to hear. 839 00:51:58,120 --> 00:52:02,560 Speaker 1: Um just like in her child why is where you know? 840 00:52:02,600 --> 00:52:05,920 Speaker 1: She she was she's this amazing psychologist named um Lucy A. 841 00:52:06,000 --> 00:52:09,560 Speaker 1: Williams who has worked in this field for decades, and 842 00:52:10,000 --> 00:52:13,360 Speaker 1: she was like, well, you know, and it's it's equally 843 00:52:14,200 --> 00:52:19,279 Speaker 1: telling that you know, Dolores is a twelve year old, 844 00:52:19,280 --> 00:52:22,160 Speaker 1: she's a pubuzz and girl. She's coming into her own sexually, 845 00:52:22,280 --> 00:52:26,560 Speaker 1: and you know, if that is used against her and 846 00:52:26,680 --> 00:52:29,560 Speaker 1: in a way that like incourage that makes it feel 847 00:52:29,640 --> 00:52:32,640 Speaker 1: unsafe for you to come into your own sexuality and 848 00:52:32,800 --> 00:52:37,000 Speaker 1: have interests and want to explore and have that just 849 00:52:37,080 --> 00:52:41,600 Speaker 1: be completely taken from you and exploited to the highest degree, 850 00:52:41,719 --> 00:52:44,959 Speaker 1: and in the way that it's described in the book, 851 00:52:45,000 --> 00:52:49,480 Speaker 1: really you know, stunts her emotional growth and causes her 852 00:52:49,520 --> 00:52:52,279 Speaker 1: to really go inward. And there's there's these scenes in 853 00:52:52,320 --> 00:52:55,319 Speaker 1: the book that no one ever talks about because there 854 00:52:55,360 --> 00:52:59,279 Speaker 1: they don't serve the main narrative of of how this 855 00:52:59,320 --> 00:53:03,600 Speaker 1: book is present did. But there's scenes where you know, 856 00:53:03,920 --> 00:53:08,880 Speaker 1: they're talking to the principle of um Dolores's school and 857 00:53:08,920 --> 00:53:13,200 Speaker 1: they're talking about how she is, you know, really not 858 00:53:13,320 --> 00:53:15,720 Speaker 1: doing well. She won't talk to people, she's not able 859 00:53:15,760 --> 00:53:18,560 Speaker 1: to open up, and it just breaks your heart because 860 00:53:18,560 --> 00:53:22,400 Speaker 1: you're just like, it is there, you know, the clear 861 00:53:22,520 --> 00:53:27,799 Speaker 1: science that she is you know, abused, she's confused, she's 862 00:53:27,800 --> 00:53:31,479 Speaker 1: suffering so much, and you're being told this, but as 863 00:53:32,520 --> 00:53:36,080 Speaker 1: a lot of readers are just not taking it in 864 00:53:36,280 --> 00:53:39,720 Speaker 1: and it's like, well, why why is it so hard 865 00:53:39,840 --> 00:53:42,919 Speaker 1: to take in if it is you know, right there. 866 00:53:43,160 --> 00:53:49,560 Speaker 1: So it's a lot I do have one last question, though, 867 00:53:51,520 --> 00:53:54,000 Speaker 1: what is Lolita fashion? And can you please tell me? 868 00:53:54,080 --> 00:53:56,600 Speaker 1: Like obviously they said please, you know, take us out 869 00:53:56,600 --> 00:54:00,640 Speaker 1: of this narrative, but what is this funny? It's really 870 00:54:00,680 --> 00:54:05,520 Speaker 1: I I've been very fortunate so far that we I 871 00:54:05,560 --> 00:54:08,759 Speaker 1: set up a discord to uh for listeners to talk 872 00:54:08,760 --> 00:54:11,480 Speaker 1: to each other, um and kind of like a safe 873 00:54:11,800 --> 00:54:15,200 Speaker 1: space um and and trying to create a space for 874 00:54:15,200 --> 00:54:18,440 Speaker 1: a discussion about this. But happened for people who have 875 00:54:18,560 --> 00:54:20,840 Speaker 1: read it over the years and are frustrated with the 876 00:54:20,880 --> 00:54:26,840 Speaker 1: literary bro uh you know, kuber interpret forced interpretation. Um, 877 00:54:27,160 --> 00:54:29,680 Speaker 1: And so I wasn't totally sure gogoing get to it, 878 00:54:29,760 --> 00:54:34,279 Speaker 1: I assumed that the two were related. Um. Apparently my understanding, 879 00:54:34,280 --> 00:54:36,799 Speaker 1: and I'm still working on my episode that addresses this. 880 00:54:37,239 --> 00:54:44,160 Speaker 1: But uh, Lolita fashion is a fashion that it's I 881 00:54:44,160 --> 00:54:48,200 Speaker 1: guess the reason it's the same term is a translation thing. 882 00:54:48,400 --> 00:54:53,560 Speaker 1: It's an unfortunate translation coincidence because the actual fashion style 883 00:54:53,719 --> 00:54:59,320 Speaker 1: is you know, kind of like a young like Rococo. 884 00:54:59,400 --> 00:55:03,640 Speaker 1: I don't know if I've ever said that word out loud, Rode, 885 00:55:03,719 --> 00:55:07,359 Speaker 1: I know what I'm talking about, but like that that's 886 00:55:07,400 --> 00:55:11,400 Speaker 1: kind of the aesthetic. Um. And so it's not you know, 887 00:55:11,480 --> 00:55:14,360 Speaker 1: it's not absurd to me that people have seen Lolita 888 00:55:14,400 --> 00:55:16,759 Speaker 1: fashion and then seeing what the fashion is and think 889 00:55:16,840 --> 00:55:20,799 Speaker 1: that the two are related. They're not. Um. But it's 890 00:55:20,800 --> 00:55:23,960 Speaker 1: been interesting because people from the Lolita fashion community have 891 00:55:24,080 --> 00:55:27,000 Speaker 1: come into our discord and been like, hey, I just 892 00:55:27,040 --> 00:55:29,520 Speaker 1: came here to say it's not related, and then I 893 00:55:29,560 --> 00:55:32,440 Speaker 1: have ended up having a really cool discussion about the book, 894 00:55:32,560 --> 00:55:36,400 Speaker 1: and uh so it Yeah, it's it's not related. It 895 00:55:36,560 --> 00:55:41,200 Speaker 1: is just a term coincidence. But there are also um 896 00:55:41,400 --> 00:55:46,240 Speaker 1: fashion subcultures that are related to Lolita. And there's I'm 897 00:55:46,640 --> 00:55:49,520 Speaker 1: still in process of like working on my episode about 898 00:55:49,920 --> 00:55:54,439 Speaker 1: um internet sub communities that have formed around this book. 899 00:55:54,480 --> 00:55:57,120 Speaker 1: But there there is like a whole kind of thriving 900 00:55:57,200 --> 00:56:01,280 Speaker 1: corner of niche fashion that is almost you know all 901 00:56:01,520 --> 00:56:07,120 Speaker 1: um you know, all women, queer people, non binary people, etcetera. 902 00:56:07,640 --> 00:56:12,160 Speaker 1: Who uh, it's called non sexual nymphat fashion, and and 903 00:56:12,200 --> 00:56:17,319 Speaker 1: it's a thing and they're having it's it's we don't 904 00:56:17,320 --> 00:56:19,120 Speaker 1: have time to get into it, but it's it's been 905 00:56:19,320 --> 00:56:23,680 Speaker 1: a very kind of a fascinating um journey of finding 906 00:56:24,600 --> 00:56:29,800 Speaker 1: ways that people have kind of reclaimed this text and 907 00:56:29,800 --> 00:56:33,480 Speaker 1: and that marginalized communities have reclaimed this text in a 908 00:56:33,520 --> 00:56:37,399 Speaker 1: way that um, I just wouldn't have expected or thought 909 00:56:37,400 --> 00:56:39,799 Speaker 1: of myself. So this pine have to be a part 910 00:56:39,840 --> 00:56:45,279 Speaker 1: to Jamie, who's the whole thing. And we didn't even 911 00:56:45,320 --> 00:56:51,600 Speaker 1: talk about the Broadway musical, so you know, to be concluded. 912 00:56:53,640 --> 00:56:56,440 Speaker 1: But in the meantime, you've got a whole podcast listeners 913 00:56:56,440 --> 00:57:00,160 Speaker 1: can listen to you about Thank you so much us 914 00:57:00,200 --> 00:57:03,440 Speaker 1: for being here. Where can the listeners find you? You 915 00:57:03,440 --> 00:57:06,400 Speaker 1: can find me on Twitter, Instagram. I'm on Twitter at 916 00:57:06,480 --> 00:57:11,360 Speaker 1: Jamie loftus help and on Instagram at Jamie christ Superstar uh. 917 00:57:11,400 --> 00:57:14,400 Speaker 1: And then you can listen to Lolita podcast and the 918 00:57:14,440 --> 00:57:18,720 Speaker 1: Bechtel Cast on iHeart Radio. There you go. Clearly there's 919 00:57:18,720 --> 00:57:23,560 Speaker 1: a lot to unpack. Go check out. If you'd like 920 00:57:23,600 --> 00:57:26,080 Speaker 1: to contact us, you can or email Stuff Media mom 921 00:57:26,160 --> 00:57:27,840 Speaker 1: Stuff at i heart media dot com. You can find 922 00:57:27,880 --> 00:57:30,240 Speaker 1: it at Twitter at mom Stuff podcast, or on Instagram 923 00:57:30,240 --> 00:57:32,040 Speaker 1: and Stuff when We ever told you. Thanks as always 924 00:57:32,040 --> 00:57:35,480 Speaker 1: to our super producer Andrew Howard. Thanks and thanks you 925 00:57:35,520 --> 00:57:37,560 Speaker 1: for listening Stuff I've Never told you. The protection of 926 00:57:37,640 --> 00:57:39,800 Speaker 1: iHeart Radio. For more podcast from my Heart Radio is 927 00:57:39,840 --> 00:57:42,040 Speaker 1: the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you listen 928 00:57:42,080 --> 00:57:42,880 Speaker 1: to your favorite shows.