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Speaker 1: Fred Show is on. It's Stay or Go. Hi, Shannon

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Speaker 1: is here? Hello, Shannon, how you doing?

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Speaker 2: Hy?

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Speaker 3: Good morning, I'm good.

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Speaker 4: How are you?

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Speaker 5: Welcome to the program? Stayre Go?

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Speaker 1: So?

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Speaker 5: What's going on with.

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Speaker 1: This?

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Speaker 5: Is your boyfriend? Yeah?

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Speaker 3: So this, look, this has really been bothering me, and

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Speaker 3: I just want to know if I'm overreacting. Basically, but

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Speaker 3: I've been dating my boyfriend for like two years, and

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Speaker 3: ever since I met him, he's had this roommate. And

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Speaker 3: the thing is, this roommate is a woman. She's you know,

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Speaker 3: straight and single. As far as I know. They met

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Speaker 3: in college and have just sort of like always good

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Speaker 3: friends and lived together. When I first met my boyfriend,

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Speaker 3: he had just resigned at Lease, and you know, obviously

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Speaker 3: I thought that was kind of an odd situation, but

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Speaker 3: I didn't feel comfortable saying anything at the time. But

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Speaker 3: cut to now, and you know, his leaf is about

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Speaker 3: to be up again, and he's talking like he's.

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Speaker 5: Going to renew it.

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Speaker 3: You know, it doesn't really seem like he's ready to

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Speaker 3: move in with me, and that's fine, because I'm not

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Speaker 3: ready for that either, but it just kind of bugs

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Speaker 3: me that he lives with this other woman. The apartment's

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Speaker 3: great and stuff. It's just like, you know, much easier

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Speaker 3: for him to have a roommate, and I can't really

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Speaker 3: ask him to like move out or find another roommate.

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Speaker 5: So you know, what should I do here, Shannon?

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Speaker 1: You've been with this guy for two years, and it

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Speaker 1: sounds like the relationship is going fine. He's lived with

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Speaker 1: this woman for two years, so I guess I don't know.

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Speaker 1: It sounds like they have firm boundaries. It sounds like,

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Speaker 1: you know, it's a platonic situation. Because again, if you

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Speaker 1: guys have been together for two years and you've had

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Speaker 1: reason to believe that he's doing something he shouldn't be doing,

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Speaker 1: then he probably wouldn't be together anymore. Right, So I mean,

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Speaker 1: just because you've been together for two years doesn't mean

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Speaker 1: that his financial situation has changed. It doesn't mean that

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Speaker 1: he should move. It doesn't mean he has to move.

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Speaker 1: You're not ready to move in with him, you admit yourself.

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Speaker 1: So I guess I don't know what the problem is, like, like,

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Speaker 1: was this a problem until he told you he was

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Speaker 1: going to renew the lease?

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Speaker 5: I guess not really.

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Speaker 3: I think you're right, it is a boundaries thing, and

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Speaker 3: I probably could have said something a while ago if

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Speaker 3: it upset me, But I just I don't know. It

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Speaker 3: just feels icky, you know. I think I probably just

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Speaker 3: have to get over it. But it's been worrying about me.

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Speaker 1: You can call it text eight five five five one

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Speaker 1: one three five Kikey's not in their head, which I know,

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Speaker 1: I know, not in your head.

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Speaker 6: I can't wait.

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Speaker 7: I can't because you know, I'm trying to be a

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Speaker 7: better person. I am, You're a great So when were

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Speaker 7: you a bad person? Well, I'm just trying not to.

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Speaker 7: I'm just trying, okay, And I don't want to tell

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Speaker 7: her to leave her man, But you know how I

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Speaker 7: feel about this. I don't why do you need to

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Speaker 7: live with a woman like everybody that's out here looking

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Speaker 7: for apartments and roommates. Why do you need to live

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Speaker 7: with a woman like? I don't to me, is this

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Speaker 7: something that's not right?

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Speaker 5: But that was my question to her.

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Speaker 1: Was it been together for two years successfully and she's

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Speaker 1: not talking about breaking up with this guy. It's not

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Speaker 1: like it's not like this has presented a problem until

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Speaker 1: he says, well, I'm gonna renew, and then she's like, well,

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Speaker 1: I don't know if I like that. Well, I mean,

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Speaker 1: he doesn't sound like he got rich in the last

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Speaker 1: two years, so we still needs a roommate. So would

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Speaker 1: you rather the person that you know and that you

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Speaker 1: don't you haven't had a problem with until now. I mean,

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Speaker 1: do you have a relationship with this woman, Shannon? Do

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Speaker 1: you talk to her at all?

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Speaker 8: Like barely at all?

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Speaker 3: Maybe in passing in the hallway, but she hasn't been

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Speaker 3: super friendly.

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Speaker 5: So is she good looking?

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Speaker 1: Fred I'll be honest with you. I'll be honest with you.

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Speaker 1: Shannon answered the question. She could looking, be honest, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: if she were ugly, would you care? Would you have

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Speaker 1: the same problem honestly? If she were seriously, Shannon, if

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Speaker 1: she were ugly, would you have the same issue that

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Speaker 1: you have with the fact that she's good looking?

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Speaker 5: Honestly? Probably not right, Helen.

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Speaker 6: You're being honest because it's some name, right.

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Speaker 5: What's not right about it?

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Speaker 1: Ruvio? I just can't like you want this man to

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Speaker 1: go get his place on his own, to play all

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Speaker 1: the rent with no roommate if you've got a man

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Speaker 1: to live with, but hold on yes to your all

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Speaker 1: of your points. If if she were saying to him, look,

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Speaker 1: I have this evidence or this feeling or this indication

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Speaker 1: that this is an inappropriate relationship between you two. If

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Speaker 1: he's kissed her, if he's dated her, if he's cheated

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Speaker 1: on her with this woman, and then he says, oh,

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Speaker 1: I'm still not moving on. That's one thing. But Shannon

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Speaker 1: herself admits there's been no issue until he decides he

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Speaker 1: wants to renew, and then it's gotten in her head. Kiki,

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Speaker 1: do you think men and women can be friends?

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Speaker 6: Blotanically?

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Speaker 5: Do you think that?

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Speaker 8: Yes?

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Speaker 7: Just not my man. Okay, I'm all a friend he needs.

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Speaker 7: He has a mom and a sister.

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Speaker 6: Okay, so I don't.

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Speaker 7: I do believe you can be friends. But because you

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Speaker 7: don't have a lot of male friends. Yeah, but I don't.

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Speaker 7: I don't want to live with him. I don't.

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Speaker 6: I don't. Have you ever done a pop up, Shannon, Like,

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Speaker 6: do you.

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Speaker 7: Just maybe sometimes, you know, just pop up, surprise, a

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Speaker 7: quality control check, figure out what's going on?

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Speaker 8: Yeah?

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Speaker 5: Have you ever done that?

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Speaker 3: But I got to add something to my schedule, is

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Speaker 3: what I'm hearing.

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Speaker 6: Yes, back up, stop it, you gotta pop up.

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Speaker 1: If this were like an AX, I mean there's a

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Speaker 1: million scenarios where where I would say that if he

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Speaker 1: stayed living with her and it bothered you for for

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Speaker 1: legitimate reasons, that would be a sign of concern. But

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Speaker 1: you didn't have any concern until he decides he wants

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Speaker 1: to renew. And now you're like, oh, I don't want

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Speaker 1: him to live with me. He can't afford to live alone.

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Speaker 1: So but also now I want to choose who his

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Speaker 1: roommate's going to be. Even though it wasn't really a

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Speaker 1: problem before.

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Speaker 6: I know, girl, we chirping, Shannon, we are the problem here,

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Speaker 6: we are. They've been friends longer than these two have

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Speaker 6: been together, the problem, and they have gotten together. If

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Speaker 6: they wanted to get a time before, they probably getting

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Speaker 6: together right now.

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Speaker 1: She wanted to why you saying that? Why do you

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Speaker 1: have to say that? Because now you put that in

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Speaker 1: her head, Shandon. Let me take some fullcosts on this.

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Speaker 1: Kiki is crazy. Don't listen to Kik do a pop up.

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Speaker 1: Good luck, Shan and half the radio on. Lets we're

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Speaker 1: gonna talk about you behind your back? Okay, okay, okay,

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Speaker 1: good thank you, Hey Christina, good morning, welcome to the program.

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Speaker 1: Yes hi, hey, So just to recap here and stay

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Speaker 1: her go. This woman has been dating a guy for

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Speaker 1: a couple of years. He had just renewed his existing

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Speaker 1: least with a female roommate, and now the liase is

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Speaker 1: up again, he's going to renew it again. She said

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Speaker 1: she never really had any reason for concern. She says

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Speaker 1: she doesn't want to live with him and he can't

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Speaker 1: live with her. She admits he didn't have enough money

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Speaker 1: to live by himself, but she wants to know she

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Speaker 1: should be worried about this woman, his female roommate.

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Speaker 5: What say you, Well, I.

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Speaker 8: Think that he can be friends with a girl without

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Speaker 8: any problems. I have many guy friends, and being a

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Speaker 8: roommate to them would be consideration obviously.

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Speaker 9: If I wasn't married.

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Speaker 8: I do you, however, think there's another issue here is

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Speaker 8: that he's signing a lease I guess for two years,

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Speaker 8: basically saying that he's not ready to move in with

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Speaker 8: her in the next two years.

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Speaker 3: Oh, so I think that maybe.

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Speaker 8: He should have a discussion with him about this, Like

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Speaker 8: you're basically saying that, yeah, I'm not ready now, but

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Speaker 8: I'm not going to be ready for two years.

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Speaker 1: Well, starting interrupt you, Christina, But admittedly she said she's

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Speaker 1: not ready to live with him either, So I mean

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Speaker 1: most liasas are are, you know, longer than a year.

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Speaker 1: I guess you could go month to month. That's more

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Speaker 1: expensive and maybe doesn't work with his roommate. But you know,

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Speaker 1: it's not as though she's like, well move in with me,

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Speaker 1: and he goes, no, I have to live with this woman.

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Speaker 1: She's not making that option available to him. So it's

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Speaker 1: not as though he's avoiding it. Yeah, she's she's avoiding it.

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Speaker 8: If anything, right, I definitely think there should be a

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Speaker 8: conversation about it. I mean, I think that it's going

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Speaker 8: to it's okay to live with guy and a girl's

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Speaker 8: live together as friends as long as she's not threatened

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Speaker 8: by the girl. I would just consider the other thing

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Speaker 8: as well.

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Speaker 9: I mean, I basically.

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Speaker 8: Saying that I'm not ready to move in with you

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Speaker 8: now is not the same as I'm not ready to

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Speaker 8: move in with you next year or or something like that.

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Speaker 8: Maybe there are other options out there.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, fair enough.

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Speaker 1: Thank you, Christina, have a good day, you too, thanks

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Speaker 1: for listening.

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Speaker 5: Glad you called. Hey, Jasmine, welcome, how you doing.

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Speaker 4: I'm good?

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Speaker 1: How are you?

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Speaker 5: Jasmine? Thank you so much for listening. So what say you?

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Speaker 5: What are we doing here?

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Speaker 4: I think that he should go because that's in security

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Speaker 4: and that's never going to work in a relationship.

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Speaker 3: I know that firsthand.

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Speaker 4: If he's been living with her way prior to even

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Speaker 4: knowing this girl, and he wanted to be with her,

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Speaker 4: he would have already done it.

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Speaker 8: You know. It's well, I.

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Speaker 5: Agree with you. Why are you making an annoying for king.

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Speaker 6: I'm sure he has done it. I mean maybe, how

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Speaker 6: are you sure he.

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Speaker 5: Has done it?

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Speaker 9: Even if he has done it, obviously it didn't work out.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, it's true.

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Speaker 4: I would with another female and her boyfriend, and that's

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Speaker 4: a completely different situation.

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Speaker 3: But I know that females.

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Speaker 4: Are ten times more clean than males, So I'm sure

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Speaker 4: she's liking that his house is always clean.

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Speaker 1: I was gonna bring that up, would you rather than

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Speaker 1: he live with a nasty ass dude, a dude that's

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Speaker 1: dirty or nasty or Hey, who's to say that.

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Speaker 5: The guy and other women over right?

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Speaker 1: And who's to say that if he kicks this girl

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Speaker 1: out and brings it guy, and the guy's that single

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Speaker 1: and like let's go out and party, you know, and

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Speaker 1: maybe he's a bad influence just because she's a woman.

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Speaker 1: That means the dude's absolutely gonna put his thing in

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Speaker 1: her thing.

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Speaker 7: You know the way you put it like that. Then

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Speaker 7: she needs to leave him all together. He can't live

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Speaker 7: with nobody because the man, the man gonna bring extra

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Speaker 7: friends out. In my head, now, God.

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Speaker 5: Needs to live in a tent by the side of

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Speaker 5: the wall.

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Speaker 1: The brand.

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Speaker 6: Be homeless.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, he needs to be homeless, exactly.

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Speaker 3: As the whole not ready to live with somebody's back.

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Speaker 4: I know people that are like engaged so don't live together.

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Speaker 4: So I don't think the whole not being ready to

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Speaker 4: live with somebody is a problem.

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Speaker 1: Don't send this man to the shelter because there's men

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Speaker 1: and women there too, you know what I mean.

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Speaker 6: Used to quit his job because there's women.

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Speaker 1: At his right exactly. Yeah, no, I mean check out,

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Speaker 1: and don't let him outside the house. Put those horse

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Speaker 1: blinders on him, because you let him down the street either.

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Speaker 1: I mean, yeah, you have a good day. Oh my god.

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Speaker 1: It would be one thing if she had a legitimate

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Speaker 1: reason for concern, which she admits she doesn't and never has.

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Speaker 5: Hey, Katie, hi, Katie, Hi, you morning stair. Go what

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Speaker 5: do you think?

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Speaker 1: So?

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Speaker 9: I have a mail roommate, right and I'm a single woman.

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Speaker 5: Obviously obviously doing it.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, obviously thing and the thing.

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Speaker 9: No, no, kill him another data, all right, he's he's

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Speaker 9: just a gross boy. And I think living with him

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Speaker 9: just really maybe because I never thought about dating him

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Speaker 9: like that. Ever, We've been friends since I school, there's

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Speaker 9: never been anything like that. But I don't know I would.

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Speaker 9: I would never date him.

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Speaker 5: So then if you do you have a boyfriend.

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Speaker 1: I do not. You don't, but if you did, then

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Speaker 1: this guy would have nothing to worry about. But you

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Speaker 1: also wouldn't necessarily go change your living arrangement just because

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Speaker 1: a guy was insecure about a relationship that you're saying

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Speaker 1: right now is platonic and will never be sexual.

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Speaker 9: Correct. Yeah, you know, it's like we lived together because

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Speaker 9: of the situations we had. You know, I needed to

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Speaker 9: move out eye if a head roommate situation. He had

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Speaker 9: just had a really bad breakup where he was living

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Speaker 9: with her, you know, So it ended up that we

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Speaker 9: both needed to live together.

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Speaker 7: Has he ever tried to hit on you?

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Speaker 9: No?

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Speaker 5: Okay, No he hasn't.

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Speaker 6: Okay, you put your nightgown on your body lotions you know.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, well obviously he certainly wouldn't be able to control themself.

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Speaker 5: There's no way.

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Speaker 3: I always walk around my apna.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 6: Yeah.

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Speaker 9: They one bathroom. So the most tension there is is

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Speaker 9: that whenever I need a shower, he seems to always

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Speaker 9: have to take a poop, and that just drives me.

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Speaker 7: So off the wall.

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Speaker 5: You don't let him do it, do you.

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Speaker 2: He snakes in.

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Speaker 9: It's like he shovels in so fast, That's what I'm saying.

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Speaker 9: I'm like, boys are so cross.

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Speaker 5: You're in the shower and he'll cut me your male roommate.

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Speaker 5: No no no.

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Speaker 2: No no no no no no no no no right right.

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Speaker 6: So then it's just hot.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, got the leftover? Yeah yeah, seemed that place. Yeah

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Speaker 1: he grows. Okay, Katie, thank you, Yeah, thank you. I

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Speaker 1: have a good day. I did one date this is

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Speaker 1: this was not in this town long time ago. I

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Speaker 1: did date a woman who still lived with their ex fiance.

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Speaker 1: And the reason that she told me was because it

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Speaker 1: was two thousand and eight, in the housing crisis and

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Speaker 1: the economy, they couldn't sell the house and they supposedly

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Speaker 1: both had money in the house, so they lived on

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Speaker 1: two separate ends of the house. I used to go

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Speaker 1: over there during the day because she worked at night,

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Speaker 1: he worked during the day, and we would do stuff.

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Speaker 1: How do you think that ended? They were doing it

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Speaker 1: the whole time. She had zero dollars in that house.

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Speaker 1: She stayed there because it was free.

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Speaker 6: See yep, oh no, sound really nice book.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm the idiot because they were x they were exes, right,

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Speaker 1: so why I had every reason to be concerned the

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Speaker 1: whole time. My gut was telling me this is wrong,

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Speaker 1: and no, no, no, you're insecure.

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Speaker 5: No, no, they were doing it the whole time.

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Speaker 6: They would know that part of this I didn't own.

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Speaker 5: And she lied about her investment in the house. There

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Speaker 5: was no investment in the house. How did you find

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Speaker 5: that out?

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Speaker 1: I found that out from him. He told me, yeah,

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Speaker 1: his side of the story. To write a book, man,

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Speaker 1: I do need to write a book.

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Speaker 5: I've seen it all.

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Speaker 1: But like, I was concerned the whole time, and I'm like,

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Speaker 1: and it didn't last very long for obvious reasons. But

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Speaker 1: I'm like, this is ridiculous. There's no way and oh no, no, no,

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Speaker 1: it's I can't I can't move. I don't have any

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Speaker 1: money because they put it all in the house. She

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Speaker 1: didn't put any money house. Lion ass liar. But my

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Speaker 1: point is that was a reason to be suspicious. This

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Speaker 1: lady's even saying I don't have any reason to be suspicious.

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Speaker 1: I just don't like it, Jenny. Hi, Jenny's yeah, stair

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Speaker 1: go What do you think.

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Speaker 8: I think that she should go? Because the issue here

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Speaker 8: for me is why is a grown man still.

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Speaker 3: Needing a roommate can support himself?

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Speaker 1: Well, now, I don't know if that's fair. It's tough

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Speaker 1: out here, right, Jenny.

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Speaker 6: This is easy.

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Speaker 8: I know it's tough, Okay, saying I.

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Speaker 2: Want the best for her.

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Speaker 3: So if if she wants the best, you need to

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Speaker 3: find someone that's stable and can support themselves.

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Speaker 6: That's right, Jenny. What's with problems?

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Speaker 5: I mean, all right, Jenny, thank you, appreciate your opinion.

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Speaker 7: Have a good days, get out of here.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, I mean I don't know about that.

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Speaker 7: She has standards. See, I can't be mad at her standard,

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Speaker 7: her standards.

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Speaker 1: I mean, so we're gonna we're gonna just qualify a

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Speaker 1: guy I don't know how they are. Let's say they're

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Speaker 1: you know, they're early in their lives and trying to

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Speaker 1: establish themselves, and we're going to disqualify men and women

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Speaker 1: now because they have roommates.

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Speaker 7: No, no, no, you know, that's what we will accept.

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Speaker 7: But Jenny is standing on business and she doesn't want

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Speaker 7: a man what a roommate, and I feel her.

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Speaker 1: Okay, I mean it's not ideal, but it's not the

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Speaker 1: end of the world, especially if you have your own place.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, in this economy, I understand.

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Speaker 5: Hey, Jessica, Hi.

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Speaker 1: Jessica, but you better not let him go out and

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Speaker 1: runt his own apartment because the leasing agent might be

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Speaker 1: a woman, and oh if she works in the building,

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Speaker 1: I'll forget about it.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, forget about it.

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Speaker 1: They're obviously going to have sex, obviously, Jessica, their go,

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Speaker 1: good morning.

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Speaker 8: I think you should go.

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Speaker 2: I've been in the same situation. We were together for

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Speaker 2: more than five years, and we started off the same.

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Speaker 2: I was, you know, thinking I was maybe being insecure

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Speaker 2: because that was a situation before we really got together.

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Speaker 2: But then he actually was like living a double life,

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Speaker 2: and I kind of just kept blowing it off, thinking

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Speaker 2: that it was just me in my head and really

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Speaker 2: all along.

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Speaker 6: They had a baby together.

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Speaker 2: I had actually do that after the situation, so it was, yeah,

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Speaker 2: it was a big thing.

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Speaker 1: And but admittedly, Jessica, the difference here is that you

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Speaker 1: saw signs, and and this woman who called us didn't

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Speaker 1: see any hasn't seen any signs. She just doesn't like it.

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Speaker 2: Well, the biggest sign was the baby.

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Speaker 5: Yeah it looked like him. That does look like him.

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Speaker 5: The nursery that they had built together in their home

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Speaker 5: in the second bedroom. No, I mean, I'm Jessica, I'm

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Speaker 5: we kept it separate.

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Speaker 2: So that was the thing. Like I feel like if

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Speaker 2: maybe if she's not really going to his house when

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Speaker 2: she's there, or I don't know, if it's separate, then

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Speaker 2: I think that that should be a red flag for her.

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Speaker 5: Okay, all right, and jess I'm sorry that happened to you.

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Speaker 2: Oh it's okay.

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Speaker 1: It's probably better. Yeah, that's the restaurate you live. You learn,

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Speaker 1: That's right, Atlantis.

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Speaker 6: Have a good day.

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Speaker 5: Have a good day.