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Speaker 1: I am super excited about this week's episode, as we

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Speaker 1: will be discussing a topic that is very dear to me, celibacy.

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Speaker 1: This unique choice holds profound significance, shaping individual lives and

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Speaker 1: distinctive ways. I am thrilled to be joined by my guests,

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Speaker 1: who has feriocely embraced the path of being celibate. Together,

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Speaker 1: we will dive into the depths of her experiences, motivations, challenges,

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Speaker 1: and rewards that lie within this extraordinary journey. We will

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Speaker 1: uncover the profound impact celibacy has had on both of

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Speaker 1: our lives, diving deep into the transformative effects and earth

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Speaker 1: and the invaluable insights she has gained along the way.

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Speaker 1: So to my guests, thank you so much for being

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Speaker 1: a part of the show.

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Speaker 2: Well, thank you for having me of course.

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Speaker 1: How you feeling, How you doing? How was your dad?

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Speaker 2: Well?

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Speaker 3: The day was good, very productive, got a lot done.

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Speaker 3: A little tired, but all as well.

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Speaker 1: Okay, we like to be productive. Chall Okay, Now, how

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Speaker 1: long have you been practicing celibacy?

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Speaker 2: For? About nine years now?

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Speaker 1: Like I told you before, when you said nine years,

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Speaker 1: I was like, nah, I think that is amazing though, Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Thank you. I think.

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Speaker 3: You know, as time went on, it wasn't something you

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Speaker 3: start to think about, well year one, year two, well

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Speaker 3: maybe year one, year two was like oh nothing, now nothing.

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Speaker 2: But then it just became.

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Speaker 3: You know, consistent or just like protocol almost for me

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Speaker 3: at least, and I just stopped thinking about it. But

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Speaker 3: now that I'm in my thirties, you know, I do

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Speaker 3: want to settle down. I do seek companionship. You know,

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Speaker 3: It's something that I have to think about more in

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Speaker 3: like the type of partner I want.

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Speaker 2: Things of that nature.

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Speaker 3: So yeah, when I say nine years, I don't even

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Speaker 3: believe in myself half the time, honestly, Well.

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Speaker 1: I'll be over here like damn, I'm on like year

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Speaker 1: three and a half or four. I'm just like Jesus Christ, like,

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Speaker 1: come on, God, where they at?

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Speaker 2: Where are they? That's a great question.

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Speaker 1: Now, what are some misconceptions or stereotypes about celibacy that

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Speaker 1: you often come across.

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Speaker 3: I feel like when people hear that I'm celibate, you know,

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Speaker 3: I get called a nun, or I'm a part of

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Speaker 3: a cult really, or they think like I'm like, I.

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Speaker 2: Think they're being solo.

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Speaker 3: Of course, a man has to many that not anything

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Speaker 3: serious but you know, or people believe like you don't

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Speaker 3: have sexual desires or you.

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Speaker 2: Don't want to uh, and that's not always the case.

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Speaker 3: Like, I'm still a woman, I still am attracted to man.

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Speaker 3: I look, I wonder sometimes I do have my own desires.

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Speaker 3: So I guess people feel like, you know, you can't

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Speaker 3: even be sexier almost like no, I know I look good.

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Speaker 3: I know when somebody else look good, right, I have

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Speaker 3: emotions towards other people.

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Speaker 2: So, yeah, your celibate.

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Speaker 3: But I think it's just like you have boundaries and

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Speaker 3: you have standards you're trying to uphold for me at least,

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Speaker 3: So that's why I'm doing it right now?

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Speaker 1: What lad you to choose to celibate lifestyle?

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Speaker 3: So initially my first sexual encounter was very horrible. I

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Speaker 3: definitely had to go to the doctor because I didn't

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Speaker 3: know what was happening downstairs. But thankfully enough, she was

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Speaker 3: just like, oh, you know, she asked me my doctor

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Speaker 3: at the time, She's like, did you have sex? I

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Speaker 3: was like yeah, when I was nineteen at the time,

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Speaker 3: and she was like, well, I wanted lucky it's an

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Speaker 3: STD couldn't tell me what it was at the time,

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Speaker 3: but she was like you know, just use protection so

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Speaker 3: that initially, you know, I was very much so traumatized.

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Speaker 1: Did she have to get medication?

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Speaker 2: No, she gave me like a hot compress and she

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Speaker 2: was like, oh, just put this here. Fine, you sure.

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Speaker 2: She just made it seem like it was nothing to

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Speaker 2: worry about.

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Speaker 3: But I guess that's also her just making sure like

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Speaker 3: I wasn't like anxious or wasn't feeling too bad about

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Speaker 3: myself because she's known me since I was like a

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Speaker 3: little girl into my adulthood.

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Speaker 1: I mean, that's good that you had a relationship with her.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, so I learned from that wrap it up.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, if I chose to do it again, just be.

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Speaker 3: Very conscientious and maybe think about myself as a woman, like,

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Speaker 3: you know, yes, sex is a part of life, but

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Speaker 3: did I need to have sex with this person? Was

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Speaker 3: it worthwhile type of thing? So that was the first

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Speaker 3: reason why. And then I was going to church from

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Speaker 3: like adolescens up until now, I still go to church,

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Speaker 3: and my faith journey has taught me like about being disciplined,

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Speaker 3: about being equally yoked. So those are some of the

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Speaker 3: like four factors that really pushed me to remain celebrate

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Speaker 3: at times what.

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Speaker 1: Your religion, but it's the entity.

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Speaker 3: Mm hmm, okay, okay, yeah, but not to say like

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Speaker 3: I haven't made mistakes.

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Speaker 2: Of course I have.

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Speaker 1: You know we're gonna too, We're gonna get into a chat.

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Speaker 1: Don't worry about that. But wait, when did you discover

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Speaker 1: you had an STD? Like did it happen like the

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Speaker 1: next day, or did it like happen over time or

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Speaker 1: you just felt like something was off.

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Speaker 3: I felt like it was maybe like the next week,

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Speaker 3: and because I had never done anything.

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Speaker 1: Right, so you don't know what's going on.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm like, well, what is this? And I just

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Speaker 2: looked down. I'm like ah, And then I start.

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Speaker 3: To think, like, oh, could it be because I had

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Speaker 3: this relation with this guy that this is why I'm

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Speaker 3: getting this? So, you know, I told one of my

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Speaker 3: two of my closest friends and they're like, yeah, you

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Speaker 3: have to be careful.

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Speaker 2: Like I'm like, oh no.

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Speaker 3: And I at the time, I didn't have an adult

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Speaker 3: figure to like warm me about sex and like the

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Speaker 3: risk factors that you take it. Obviously, we go to

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Speaker 3: school in high school and stuff like that, but I

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Speaker 3: feel like sex growing up is not a candid conversation,

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Speaker 3: at least not within my household.

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Speaker 1: I was like, nobody taught you about the birds and bees?

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Speaker 2: No, but I saw them. We had another kid. My

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Speaker 2: mom has five kids. I'm like, oh, oh wow.

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Speaker 1: So what was your reception on sex then in relationships

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Speaker 1: before you became cellivant.

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Speaker 2: That's a great question my reception.

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Speaker 1: Listen, I'm gonna get my Oprah on now.

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Speaker 2: You definitely are just relationships.

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Speaker 3: I don't think I've always had the best models. I've

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Speaker 3: seen a lot of heartache with women in my life

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Speaker 3: and my family or I did see babies. My aunts

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Speaker 3: have been married, not my mom, but I hadn't had

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Speaker 3: the best examples. But even with the married people, like

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Speaker 3: you see, people struggle and I felt like at the

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Speaker 3: time it wasn't spoken about enough, but I didn't. The

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Speaker 3: most I had a conversation was Mam telling me not

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Speaker 3: to get pregnant at sexy and I'm like, why would

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Speaker 3: you even think that i'mnna.

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Speaker 1: Get pregnant right right?

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Speaker 2: But that was there, but she gave.

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Speaker 3: Me I'm like, why you think, I'm like, even though

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Speaker 3: I'm a virgin still, But I guess when she was

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Speaker 3: thinking about our culture at the time, a lot of

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Speaker 3: people were active in high school and like, as a

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Speaker 3: psychologist today, we know that high schoolers.

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Speaker 1: Have sex, middle schools have sex.

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Speaker 2: That is the truth.

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Speaker 3: But my perception was just like, you know, you fall

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Speaker 3: in love, you have sex, you like somebody, you have sex,

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Speaker 3: you want to have fun, you have sex. But I

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Speaker 3: was always afraid because I just never found somebody until

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Speaker 3: you know, I got old enough and I thought I

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Speaker 3: liked this guy, and I did like him a lot,

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Speaker 3: and I chose him or that was a results.

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Speaker 1: You know what's so funny even we was I don't

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Speaker 1: know about you, but I feel like when somebody's being

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Speaker 1: nice to you, you have sex, like you showed, that's

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Speaker 1: how you show your appreciation.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I did like him a lot.

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Speaker 1: Did you tell that? Did he bring you?

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Speaker 2: Oh?

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Speaker 1: I did.

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Speaker 3: He didn't even know. I think if it wasn't for me,

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Speaker 3: he may not have known what had happened. He was

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Speaker 3: just like, no, he don't know what this is. And

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Speaker 3: I'm like, well, you need to go to the doctor,

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Speaker 3: because like I never did anything with anybody, so you

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Speaker 3: are the only factor that this is coming from. And

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Speaker 3: we did stay together after that, and then shortly after

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Speaker 3: we broke up and it got back together. In my

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Speaker 3: twenties because I really liked him or loved him rather.

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Speaker 1: That thing was thing. Yeah wait, if you think that

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Speaker 1: you didn't get if you didn't never receive the STD,

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Speaker 1: do you think he would have been celibate?

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Speaker 2: Now, I don't know's I don't know.

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Speaker 1: Because I'm not gonna lie. If I would have got

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Speaker 1: an STD on my first time, like I that would

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Speaker 1: have fucked me up, especially with that I'm fucking with

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Speaker 1: like like I'm like, I'm going hard for it, Like

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Speaker 1: I can only imagine how you feel, especially when you

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Speaker 1: don't have a safe space with you know, older people,

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Speaker 1: older women to like go to, right.

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Speaker 3: I don't know, It's hard to tell, but I know

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Speaker 3: after him, I did have another partner, and I think

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Speaker 3: after that I was like, no, like I'm.

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Speaker 1: Done, Like this is not it be done with that one.

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Speaker 2: Because he wasn't my boyfriend.

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Speaker 3: He was somebody that actually had a crush on in

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Speaker 3: college and he knew I had a crush on him,

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Speaker 3: so we were just flirt I'm like, dag, you know,

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Speaker 3: I like him and he just not not. But you know,

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Speaker 3: one thing led to the next one night, and I

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Speaker 3: knew he wasn't my man, but.

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Speaker 2: You know, I made a decision to indulge with him, and.

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Speaker 3: You know, he wanted to kiss me while we were intimate,

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Speaker 3: and I said no because in the back of my mind,

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Speaker 3: I'm like, this is not my boyfriend, and I kind

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Speaker 3: of knew, like this is probably a one time thing.

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Speaker 1: So you just wanted to say, you know, I guess so.

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Speaker 3: Me and my bad self with so much experience, So

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Speaker 3: actually I was trying to run from him. It was funny,

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Speaker 3: but you know, man will be persistent, and I gave

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Speaker 3: in eventually. I don't think I wasn't forced. Let me

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Speaker 3: be say, I was not forced on my made a

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Speaker 3: decision and it was.

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Speaker 2: It was okay.

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Speaker 3: Like so then after that, I honestly I cried because

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Speaker 3: for me, I knew I wanted somebody that loved and

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Speaker 3: cared about me, and I knew I couldn't get.

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Speaker 1: It from him, right right. That's how I feel like

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Speaker 1: I've been telling people like I want to have sex

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Speaker 1: with somebody that I'm proud of, like like I want

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Speaker 1: to have sex and no, seriously, like I want to

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Speaker 1: have sex with somebody that's like that it's going to

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Speaker 1: be fulfilling, Like I'm tired of having Like what is

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Speaker 1: it meaningless or zero ass sex, Like I want something

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Speaker 1: that's going to be like wow, like we can possibly

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Speaker 1: create magic. Like I feel like when you have sex

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Speaker 1: with these niggas, they just take take, take, take, take.

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Speaker 2: And you feel so empty inside.

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Speaker 1: Empty sex. That's the way I was looking for. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: Like I mean, at.

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Speaker 3: The time, I didn't want to do it again. That

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Speaker 3: was my body talking to me. But my mind was like,

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Speaker 3: you don't love him, he doesn't love you. Nothing is

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Speaker 3: going to become up this. So yeah, I was done.

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Speaker 3: After that, I was like, yeah, no, I don't know how.

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Speaker 3: I don't know how anybody else does it.

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Speaker 2: I really don't.

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Speaker 3: Sometimes I used to wish like, oh I could be

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Speaker 3: so free and like just move on to the next.

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Speaker 2: But you know that that hasn't been my journey.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, that's not no more either. It is okay. I

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Speaker 1: think it says a lot about those who can be still,

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Speaker 1: especially in the in the face of temptations.

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Speaker 2: Girl girl, times you gotta run.

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Speaker 1: I want to get some repell it, get the fuck

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Speaker 1: away from me. How has celibacy influenced your relationships with others,

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Speaker 1: both romantic and non romantic.

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Speaker 3: So romantically, I'm trying to think who did I talk

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Speaker 3: to after these two encounters. Romantically, you know, I try

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Speaker 3: to be very candid with whomever I was talking to,

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Speaker 3: or it was just like, you know, make out and

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Speaker 3: that's it, make out and that's sick. And then you know,

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Speaker 3: I would tell men like, you know, this is my journey.

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Speaker 3: They would agree or disagree, or someone just try to

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Speaker 3: still like try to take you to that next level.

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Speaker 3: But faithfully, I've been able to like say at least

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Speaker 3: know when it comes to that. And then non romantically,

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Speaker 3: I think I am blessed to have friends who are

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Speaker 3: active and they never made me feel like, hey, you're

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Speaker 3: missing out or you need to change your lifestyle. It's

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Speaker 3: more so like they respected my values and they would

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Speaker 3: just listen to me and just hear me out and

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Speaker 3: if they know, like this is something that I want

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Speaker 3: to do. It was never a question like, well nobody's

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Speaker 3: doing that. But the conversation of dating becoming hard, that's

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Speaker 3: been a topic that we go over. But my friends,

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Speaker 3: I'm very thankful for them. They're very honest. It's like,

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Speaker 3: you know, they have sex, like y'all go ahead, go.

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Speaker 3: And then I do have friends who are celibate also,

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Speaker 3: or even some who are virgins.

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Speaker 1: Oh that's amazing.

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Speaker 2: The best of both worlds almost, like right, yeah.

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Speaker 1: Like you got your friends and you'd be like, oh,

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Speaker 1: I'm so glad I ain't doing that shit.

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Speaker 3: Well I just be like, like, look, one friend, she

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Speaker 3: was like, girl, let me tell you what happened hours.

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Speaker 3: I'm like, sis, I don't want to know. I'm like,

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Speaker 3: I'm not judging you. I said, I am no better,

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Speaker 3: I'm like, whatever you did you Then she's like, girl,

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Speaker 3: I know she said I repented. I'm like, go ahead,

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Speaker 3: do what you gotta do. I just appreciate transparency and

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Speaker 3: respect at the.

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Speaker 1: End of the day, right, But I do appreciate my

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Speaker 1: friends where I can live through them and I'm like,

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Speaker 1: what happened, Like tell me to.

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Speaker 2: And I even tell them something. We even joke.

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Speaker 3: I'm like, so, I'm like, God, So when I get

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Speaker 3: ready and're like what am I supposed to do?

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Speaker 2: They like You're gonna be fine.

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Speaker 3: I'm like yeah, sure, Like is there a book I

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Speaker 3: need to read because I think I really.

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Speaker 2: Wote know what to do? And people are like, no,

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Speaker 2: you'll be okay. I'm like, all right, a little bit,

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Speaker 2: m hmmm, a little bit. I'm pretty sure been a.

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Speaker 1: While, and you're going on ten years. When is it

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Speaker 1: going to be ten years?

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Speaker 2: Uh?

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Speaker 3: I think when that happened that last timme, it was

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Speaker 3: a summer, So next year it will be next summer.

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Speaker 1: Oh wow, we're not gonna work.

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Speaker 2: God. If I do not give it to temptation, right,

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Speaker 2: I'll be You know, we should have a celibacy party.

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Speaker 1: I'm not trying to make it to four years, so

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Speaker 1: I'm trying to find my man. I know we should

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Speaker 1: look for a man at this point, so we can

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Speaker 1: have a celibacy party. I mean, we're gonna talk about

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Speaker 1: how being celibate has rewarded us both. But I feel like,

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Speaker 1: you know, I feel like every woman should go through

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Speaker 1: this in her journey. M hmm, because you want to

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Speaker 1: lie about yourself.

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Speaker 2: No, it's definitely. God.

303
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Speaker 3: I do have points where I get sexually frustrated, and

304
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Speaker 3: especially after you know, you have to cycle. The hormones

305
00:15:09,240 --> 00:15:14,880
Speaker 3: are hormoning type of things. But yeah, I'm just going

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Speaker 3: to see what the journey takes me. It does help

307
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Speaker 3: me be more disciplined, It helps me focus on my

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Speaker 3: goals a lot more. I do feel like because when

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Speaker 3: I did have sexual encounters. You know, some people get

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Speaker 3: digmatized and like you start thinking about these people. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: and sometimes it's sometimes times sometimes it's not, but it

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Speaker 3: just helps me focuses focus on other aspects of my

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Speaker 3: life right now.

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Speaker 1: Have you faced any challenges or difficulties and maintaining celibacy

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Speaker 1: and if so, how do you deal with them?

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Speaker 2: Yeah? Because I'm still dating.

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Speaker 1: What you be doing when you be dating? What's so different.

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Speaker 2: So lately?

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Speaker 3: Or like if I do like somebody, you know, we

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Speaker 3: make out and even though I'm celibate, I know, like

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Speaker 3: I like to be touched. Men like to be touched,

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Speaker 3: So that happens, and then you know, people get aroused, and.

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Speaker 2: What you do.

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Speaker 1: What you do when niggas get around?

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Speaker 2: Oh man, I enjoy it.

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Speaker 1: And you know, Patty, you enjoy it.

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Speaker 3: I mean I let they come close and then as

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Speaker 3: soon as they think it's gonna.

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Speaker 2: Go out and be like, no, you just can't.

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Speaker 1: And I don't feel bad. Don't be a dick te

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Speaker 1: so you be letting them put the tip in.

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Speaker 2: Not even then just by.

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Speaker 1: Like, yeah, you know you're uncomfortable because.

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Speaker 3: I don't want to lie and be like oh no, girl,

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Speaker 3: I would never right, That's what has happened and you know,

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00:16:49,800 --> 00:16:52,520
Speaker 3: I've been warned by my male friends.

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00:16:52,520 --> 00:16:54,480
Speaker 2: They will tell me like, you know, just be careful

338
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Speaker 2: because guys don't like that.

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Speaker 3: You don't want to be a tease. You don't want

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00:16:58,560 --> 00:17:01,200
Speaker 3: them to think they're gonna get into something. But at

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Speaker 3: least with the very few people that has happened with,

342
00:17:04,800 --> 00:17:07,080
Speaker 3: they have known me for some time or understand like

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Speaker 3: I've told them like, look.

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Speaker 2: I know I'm not going to go forward.

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Speaker 3: And like even if I tell myself, let me try

346
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Speaker 3: to let go, I really can't, right, I really can't.

347
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Speaker 3: I don't know what it is. I don't know if

348
00:17:18,640 --> 00:17:21,200
Speaker 3: I think God gonna come get me or something bag

349
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Speaker 3: gonna happen.

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Speaker 2: But I could never just be like we'll go get

351
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Speaker 2: a condo and I can't, right, so we just stopped.

352
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Speaker 1: I'm sorry, No, you gotta have a hell of a discipline.

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Speaker 1: But you know what I have, I know that feeling

354
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Speaker 1: because I had a little situation like that and I

355
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Speaker 1: wanted to go like all the way, but I was

356
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Speaker 1: just like this, ain't this, ain't the time like this

357
00:17:40,040 --> 00:17:41,800
Speaker 1: ain't it like you just you know when you know.

358
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Speaker 3: Yeah, So I'm like, dang son, I've been trying to

359
00:17:46,680 --> 00:17:50,400
Speaker 3: tell them like like, let's just stop, and okay, y'all

360
00:17:50,400 --> 00:17:52,040
Speaker 3: want to go. But I know if it gets the

361
00:17:52,160 --> 00:17:56,120
Speaker 3: point like okay, like we gotta stop. So I also

362
00:17:56,200 --> 00:17:59,560
Speaker 3: have to stop, right right, I also have to stop

363
00:17:59,600 --> 00:18:02,320
Speaker 3: making it even get there, so I don't have to

364
00:18:02,320 --> 00:18:03,240
Speaker 3: have these situations.

365
00:18:03,320 --> 00:18:05,680
Speaker 1: So what else is not off limits?

366
00:18:07,320 --> 00:18:10,440
Speaker 3: I wouldn't say it's not off limits, but there has

367
00:18:10,520 --> 00:18:12,160
Speaker 3: been oral sex do.

368
00:18:12,160 --> 00:18:16,800
Speaker 2: You give you? Or sex they have you know you

369
00:18:16,880 --> 00:18:22,800
Speaker 2: gonna get you? Yeah? So terrible.

370
00:18:24,520 --> 00:18:25,440
Speaker 1: How often you be getting?

371
00:18:26,280 --> 00:18:29,440
Speaker 2: Not often? It's not often. It really isn't often.

372
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Speaker 3: I had one guy I was dealing with for off

373
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Speaker 3: and off about five six years, and that was toxic.

374
00:18:35,359 --> 00:18:37,080
Speaker 3: And it took me a while to realize that it

375
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Speaker 3: was toxic because.

376
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Speaker 1: So this nigga was just eating you out and that's it.

377
00:18:42,080 --> 00:18:43,960
Speaker 2: I returned to favor, but it took me a while

378
00:18:45,400 --> 00:18:45,640
Speaker 2: a while.

379
00:18:45,640 --> 00:18:48,240
Speaker 3: We're talking about maybe a good two years before I

380
00:18:48,280 --> 00:18:51,560
Speaker 3: even like, I was like, okay, let me just reciprocate.

381
00:18:51,640 --> 00:18:52,960
Speaker 2: But we didn't even do it a lot.

382
00:18:53,359 --> 00:18:56,000
Speaker 3: But the whole issue was that we both know knew

383
00:18:56,080 --> 00:18:59,400
Speaker 3: rather that we wanted something different and here I said,

384
00:18:59,440 --> 00:19:02,320
Speaker 3: and here he's that, and was still entertaining each other.

385
00:19:02,480 --> 00:19:03,800
Speaker 2: You playing We did like each other.

386
00:19:03,920 --> 00:19:06,000
Speaker 1: You're playing with fire. Ain't no way I'm sucking dick

387
00:19:06,040 --> 00:19:07,040
Speaker 1: and I'm not fucking.

388
00:19:07,560 --> 00:19:09,240
Speaker 2: Sometimes that's what has happened.

389
00:19:09,280 --> 00:19:11,040
Speaker 3: And the other times, you know, I did like the

390
00:19:11,119 --> 00:19:13,680
Speaker 3: guy at the time I was dealing with, so I reciprocated,

391
00:19:14,200 --> 00:19:18,399
Speaker 3: you know, in the first time, that's.

392
00:19:18,160 --> 00:19:18,560
Speaker 2: What you think.

393
00:19:18,560 --> 00:19:22,040
Speaker 1: It was, right, right, right, right, so, but.

394
00:19:21,960 --> 00:19:23,960
Speaker 3: Then after a while it didn't work out. It was

395
00:19:24,040 --> 00:19:26,040
Speaker 3: just like, you know, I wanted more. He wasn't what

396
00:19:26,080 --> 00:19:27,960
Speaker 3: I wanted in a man, and I'm sure he wanted

397
00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:30,840
Speaker 3: more from a female, right said ended.

398
00:19:31,440 --> 00:19:33,960
Speaker 1: But I'm pretty sure because you're an attractive woman. So

399
00:19:34,000 --> 00:19:36,240
Speaker 1: I'm pretty sure that when you're getting to that point,

400
00:19:36,720 --> 00:19:39,280
Speaker 1: she said, thank you, when you're getting to that point

401
00:19:39,320 --> 00:19:40,680
Speaker 1: where the man like, it's going to get to a

402
00:19:40,680 --> 00:19:42,480
Speaker 1: point where Nigga's gonna be like, Okay, I don't even

403
00:19:42,480 --> 00:19:43,960
Speaker 1: want to hear no more, like I want to like

404
00:19:44,080 --> 00:19:48,560
Speaker 1: experience you. Yeah, right, it.

405
00:19:48,600 --> 00:19:52,200
Speaker 3: Probably will be, but I don't know. So that's why

406
00:19:52,280 --> 00:19:55,600
Speaker 3: I just need to change my actions. Like so, temptation

407
00:19:55,760 --> 00:19:59,200
Speaker 3: for me right now was like for me, I think

408
00:19:59,240 --> 00:20:02,440
Speaker 3: I don't need to be hand cold stores with a man. Hmmm,

409
00:20:03,200 --> 00:20:06,920
Speaker 3: I don't feel like I have enough self discipline.

410
00:20:07,480 --> 00:20:09,440
Speaker 1: Two after nine years.

411
00:20:11,240 --> 00:20:13,000
Speaker 3: Like you said, But like you said, somebody's gonna be

412
00:20:13,000 --> 00:20:16,159
Speaker 3: like I want you and like I don't know. Just

413
00:20:16,240 --> 00:20:18,879
Speaker 3: Fortunately no guy has pressed me to the extent I've

414
00:20:18,880 --> 00:20:20,280
Speaker 3: been able to say no. But I would hate to

415
00:20:20,280 --> 00:20:22,840
Speaker 3: be in a predictament where I don't have a choice.

416
00:20:23,200 --> 00:20:25,560
Speaker 1: Yeah, I wasn't talking about that, but yet also you

417
00:20:25,600 --> 00:20:28,119
Speaker 1: have to think about that too, unfortunately, because these niggas

418
00:20:28,119 --> 00:20:30,800
Speaker 1: be trying it, and I will want you in that

419
00:20:30,880 --> 00:20:38,080
Speaker 1: predictive predictament either. Yeah, is that something you fear, not.

420
00:20:38,119 --> 00:20:38,680
Speaker 2: That I feel.

421
00:20:38,720 --> 00:20:40,920
Speaker 3: I guess because I recently started dating and I got

422
00:20:40,960 --> 00:20:43,160
Speaker 3: really close to a guy that.

423
00:20:44,640 --> 00:20:45,760
Speaker 2: I don't really know that well.

424
00:20:46,000 --> 00:20:47,920
Speaker 3: Like we were talking for like a month or two months,

425
00:20:47,920 --> 00:20:49,840
Speaker 3: but it's just like I don't know this person.

426
00:20:49,560 --> 00:20:52,200
Speaker 2: That well, right, and we got really close and I'm

427
00:20:52,240 --> 00:20:52,600
Speaker 2: just like.

428
00:20:54,040 --> 00:20:56,960
Speaker 3: I told, like he knows my standard, but I don't

429
00:20:56,960 --> 00:20:58,240
Speaker 3: know what if he wanted more and.

430
00:20:58,240 --> 00:21:00,240
Speaker 2: I'm just like, oh, you know, let's just have a

431
00:21:00,240 --> 00:21:00,560
Speaker 2: good time.

432
00:21:00,600 --> 00:21:02,400
Speaker 3: We can make our touch kiss and he wants more,

433
00:21:02,440 --> 00:21:05,159
Speaker 3: and then what if it turned into something else I

434
00:21:05,240 --> 00:21:05,720
Speaker 3: didn't want.

435
00:21:05,720 --> 00:21:07,240
Speaker 2: I don't know how that would have went now, So

436
00:21:07,280 --> 00:21:07,920
Speaker 2: I just want.

437
00:21:07,720 --> 00:21:11,160
Speaker 3: To be careful and cautious, right, and just not slip

438
00:21:11,240 --> 00:21:12,640
Speaker 3: up because it's easy to slip up.

439
00:21:13,400 --> 00:21:15,240
Speaker 2: Maybe it's not easy because I haven't slipped up yet,

440
00:21:15,240 --> 00:21:16,000
Speaker 2: but you never know.

441
00:21:16,440 --> 00:21:17,080
Speaker 1: Do you drink?

442
00:21:18,600 --> 00:21:19,440
Speaker 2: I do socially?

443
00:21:20,000 --> 00:21:22,560
Speaker 1: Oh okay, so you don't be getting looked like that because.

444
00:21:23,520 --> 00:21:29,439
Speaker 3: Now when I'm around me, nah, I don't get drunk.

445
00:21:29,920 --> 00:21:31,520
Speaker 3: I'll get tipsy, but I don't get drunk.

446
00:21:31,640 --> 00:21:33,280
Speaker 1: So I mean, yeah, that's you don't lit like I get.

447
00:21:33,560 --> 00:21:35,880
Speaker 1: I get. I get to feeling good if I'm around man,

448
00:21:35,960 --> 00:21:37,880
Speaker 1: I'm like, Chad, you gotta go home.

449
00:21:39,440 --> 00:21:40,720
Speaker 2: Far because I don't know.

450
00:21:41,600 --> 00:21:45,399
Speaker 1: Yeah, right, So how do you find balance between celibacy

451
00:21:45,440 --> 00:21:49,200
Speaker 1: and fulfilling the desires for intimacy and companionship.

452
00:21:53,119 --> 00:21:56,680
Speaker 3: I really try to tap into my prayer life because yes,

453
00:21:57,080 --> 00:22:00,879
Speaker 3: like I'm thirty four, companionship is because I mean something

454
00:22:00,880 --> 00:22:03,360
Speaker 3: I see now. I live by myself. I do want

455
00:22:03,359 --> 00:22:07,119
Speaker 3: to feel me one day. But sometimes I don't even

456
00:22:07,119 --> 00:22:09,439
Speaker 3: think about the celibacy journey. I just think more of

457
00:22:09,800 --> 00:22:13,600
Speaker 3: it as me allowing God to move in my life more.

458
00:22:13,960 --> 00:22:17,760
Speaker 3: And it's a struggle, it really is to have a

459
00:22:17,800 --> 00:22:21,560
Speaker 3: relationship with God and then you fall into societal norms.

460
00:22:21,600 --> 00:22:24,840
Speaker 3: It's a battle every day. So I do surround myself

461
00:22:24,880 --> 00:22:29,639
Speaker 3: with like minded people. I listen to YouTube videos with

462
00:22:29,680 --> 00:22:31,600
Speaker 3: people that talk about this topic.

463
00:22:31,800 --> 00:22:32,280
Speaker 2: Often.

464
00:22:33,280 --> 00:22:35,400
Speaker 3: There are people in my life who, you know, they

465
00:22:35,400 --> 00:22:36,680
Speaker 3: don't shun me for my.

466
00:22:36,720 --> 00:22:38,119
Speaker 2: Beliefs or they're doing the same thing.

467
00:22:38,160 --> 00:22:42,720
Speaker 3: So that has helped I go to the gym, focus

468
00:22:42,800 --> 00:22:46,040
Speaker 3: on my career when I can do my hair, figure

469
00:22:46,040 --> 00:22:49,960
Speaker 3: my apartment, other things, and like, you know, if I

470
00:22:49,960 --> 00:22:53,200
Speaker 3: had these desires, I just happened for a split second.

471
00:22:53,359 --> 00:22:54,440
Speaker 2: But sometimes I.

472
00:22:54,400 --> 00:22:56,480
Speaker 3: Literally I asked God today because I was feeling lonely,

473
00:22:56,480 --> 00:22:58,840
Speaker 3: and I was like, God, like, I don't even to

474
00:22:58,880 --> 00:23:02,000
Speaker 3: think about him right now, right right you literally, can

475
00:23:02,119 --> 00:23:04,160
Speaker 3: you please help me because I can't help myself. I'm

476
00:23:04,160 --> 00:23:07,240
Speaker 3: thinking about somebody who who you don't have set out

477
00:23:07,240 --> 00:23:09,399
Speaker 3: for me, but I'm attached to this person because we

478
00:23:09,440 --> 00:23:10,120
Speaker 3: have we shared.

479
00:23:09,960 --> 00:23:12,240
Speaker 2: Him a moment the other day or something. But I

480
00:23:12,320 --> 00:23:14,000
Speaker 2: really try to talk to God. I trying to talk

481
00:23:14,040 --> 00:23:33,760
Speaker 2: to God. I trying to talk to God. God. I

482
00:23:33,800 --> 00:23:35,560
Speaker 2: really try to talk to God because I don't know

483
00:23:35,600 --> 00:23:36,080
Speaker 2: what else to do.

484
00:23:36,160 --> 00:23:39,520
Speaker 1: Sometimes, yeah, that's what I do. I feel like, I

485
00:23:39,520 --> 00:23:41,600
Speaker 1: feel like when I don't think about sex. I don't

486
00:23:41,640 --> 00:23:43,680
Speaker 1: think about it like some shit really be out of sight,

487
00:23:43,800 --> 00:23:45,800
Speaker 1: out of mind. But then I feel like when I

488
00:23:45,800 --> 00:23:47,639
Speaker 1: do think about it, like it really be like and

489
00:23:47,680 --> 00:23:50,440
Speaker 1: it's not even about sex. Sometimes it just be the companionship.

490
00:23:50,960 --> 00:23:53,320
Speaker 1: And you know, being the only person in my close

491
00:23:53,359 --> 00:23:57,080
Speaker 1: friend group that doesn't have a partner, sometimes I be like, damn,

492
00:23:57,320 --> 00:24:00,000
Speaker 1: like but you know, I'm talking to my best friend

493
00:24:00,280 --> 00:24:02,560
Speaker 1: and he was telling me, like, you know, he always

494
00:24:02,560 --> 00:24:04,399
Speaker 1: put things in perspective, and I'm like, you gotta be

495
00:24:04,400 --> 00:24:07,240
Speaker 1: thankful for people around you like that. But he was

496
00:24:07,280 --> 00:24:09,160
Speaker 1: just saying, like, you know, sometimes you'd be so hard

497
00:24:09,160 --> 00:24:10,639
Speaker 1: on stuff and to come to certain things. He was like,

498
00:24:10,640 --> 00:24:12,639
Speaker 1: but you're exactly where you wanted to be at. He

499
00:24:12,800 --> 00:24:16,160
Speaker 1: was like, some people water other areas in their life.

500
00:24:16,200 --> 00:24:18,480
Speaker 1: And he was like, in some cases, your friends watered

501
00:24:18,480 --> 00:24:21,440
Speaker 1: their relationship and they wanted love, he said, whereas you

502
00:24:21,440 --> 00:24:23,200
Speaker 1: you watered your business. And he was like, and look

503
00:24:23,240 --> 00:24:25,280
Speaker 1: at you now. He was like, so now that you

504
00:24:25,480 --> 00:24:27,400
Speaker 1: in a place where you comfortable, he was like, now

505
00:24:27,440 --> 00:24:30,359
Speaker 1: you can put that energy towards everything else. But he

506
00:24:30,440 --> 00:24:32,000
Speaker 1: was like, I know it's hard, and I'm like, yeah,

507
00:24:32,040 --> 00:24:34,520
Speaker 1: because I'm like you're gonna live by myself? Like you know,

508
00:24:34,680 --> 00:24:36,840
Speaker 1: I'm pretty and shit like what my nigga Like, I'm

509
00:24:36,840 --> 00:24:38,640
Speaker 1: tired of put it off, bills.

510
00:24:41,359 --> 00:24:43,240
Speaker 2: The garbage. I'm like, I got to do it.

511
00:24:43,400 --> 00:24:49,080
Speaker 1: I want to wake up getting my back broken. You

512
00:24:49,080 --> 00:24:51,440
Speaker 1: you know, saying I want the same last name what

513
00:24:51,600 --> 00:24:52,480
Speaker 1: the New York says.

514
00:24:52,800 --> 00:24:56,640
Speaker 2: It sounds so nice, it really does. But I don't

515
00:24:56,640 --> 00:24:59,440
Speaker 2: want to rush. I don't want to rush exactly.

516
00:24:59,720 --> 00:25:02,280
Speaker 3: And and then, like you said, I have friends too,

517
00:25:02,320 --> 00:25:04,919
Speaker 3: they having babies, hearing now I'm a godparent now and

518
00:25:04,960 --> 00:25:08,240
Speaker 3: it's just like, let my child, I have a sister brother.

519
00:25:08,240 --> 00:25:10,920
Speaker 2: I'm like, when the time comes to you, why night?

520
00:25:10,960 --> 00:25:14,560
Speaker 2: But you know their journey is their journey, right and

521
00:25:14,640 --> 00:25:15,720
Speaker 2: this is our journey.

522
00:25:15,920 --> 00:25:18,960
Speaker 3: And I just feel like, like you said, we live

523
00:25:19,000 --> 00:25:21,880
Speaker 3: in a society where delayed gratification is not a thing.

524
00:25:22,359 --> 00:25:24,960
Speaker 3: Certain times people rush, And I'm not saying we don't.

525
00:25:25,000 --> 00:25:26,359
Speaker 3: It's not that we don't want to be in love.

526
00:25:26,720 --> 00:25:29,080
Speaker 3: But I even have to ask myself today, like what

527
00:25:29,200 --> 00:25:30,840
Speaker 3: does love look like in a relationship?

528
00:25:32,000 --> 00:25:35,320
Speaker 2: Am I ready to submit? Am I ready to service? Like?

529
00:25:35,600 --> 00:25:36,399
Speaker 2: Am I there?

530
00:25:37,119 --> 00:25:39,840
Speaker 3: Or is God still preparing me more to get ready

531
00:25:39,840 --> 00:25:43,280
Speaker 3: for whenever that time comes. And that's just something like

532
00:25:43,320 --> 00:25:45,439
Speaker 3: you know, for me personally, I need to tappen too

533
00:25:45,880 --> 00:25:47,840
Speaker 3: before I can even say I'm ready to give myself

534
00:25:48,040 --> 00:25:49,640
Speaker 3: or share myself with somebody.

535
00:25:49,320 --> 00:25:54,240
Speaker 1: Else, right, right, right? No, I agree. Have you discovered

536
00:25:54,280 --> 00:26:00,440
Speaker 1: any surprising or unexpected aspects of yourself through celibacy?

537
00:26:05,040 --> 00:26:09,439
Speaker 2: No, I don't know that's surprising. It's probably joke. But

538
00:26:10,119 --> 00:26:12,280
Speaker 2: this is the followical hair?

539
00:26:13,440 --> 00:26:14,280
Speaker 1: What followical hair?

540
00:26:14,960 --> 00:26:18,440
Speaker 2: Well? PUBI kids, they're changing colors, child, I'm like.

541
00:26:18,920 --> 00:26:20,000
Speaker 1: What they changing to gray?

542
00:26:20,520 --> 00:26:20,920
Speaker 2: Gray?

543
00:26:21,520 --> 00:26:25,600
Speaker 1: You're lying, but the gray was only up here? Girl,

544
00:26:25,680 --> 00:26:29,479
Speaker 1: grays everywhere you can't age.

545
00:26:29,400 --> 00:26:29,600
Speaker 3: Yeah.

546
00:26:29,680 --> 00:26:31,359
Speaker 2: I was just like, it'd be like two streets. I'm like,

547
00:26:32,800 --> 00:26:33,880
Speaker 2: I have sex.

548
00:26:35,880 --> 00:26:37,520
Speaker 1: Did you pluck it out?

549
00:26:37,880 --> 00:26:38,000
Speaker 2: Now?

550
00:26:38,080 --> 00:26:40,359
Speaker 3: I thought about it because I'm like, but if the

551
00:26:40,440 --> 00:26:43,400
Speaker 3: here goes, it'd be this one strand and real gray.

552
00:26:43,480 --> 00:26:46,200
Speaker 2: I'm like, damn you just shining break down the arm hair?

553
00:26:47,080 --> 00:26:48,280
Speaker 1: Give you have no great coutie hair.

554
00:26:49,840 --> 00:26:54,400
Speaker 2: Thirty That's what I'm saying. I'm like, I don't know, you.

555
00:26:54,280 --> 00:26:55,040
Speaker 1: Can't hear down.

556
00:26:57,280 --> 00:26:57,800
Speaker 2: A little bit.

557
00:26:58,160 --> 00:26:59,560
Speaker 1: Oh you're gonna do like a little ball.

558
00:27:01,119 --> 00:27:05,400
Speaker 3: No, I clean it up, but when it grows back,

559
00:27:05,480 --> 00:27:08,240
Speaker 3: it'd be like it's just this one piece of gregge

560
00:27:08,400 --> 00:27:10,840
Speaker 3: like you just shining breaks.

561
00:27:12,080 --> 00:27:15,240
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm like, what is this? But I don't think

562
00:27:15,280 --> 00:27:18,360
Speaker 2: I got any surprises through celibacy.

563
00:27:18,480 --> 00:27:22,240
Speaker 3: I just think my mindset is pretty different for a

564
00:27:22,320 --> 00:27:23,480
Speaker 3: lot of others out there.

565
00:27:23,800 --> 00:27:26,800
Speaker 1: Yeah, I feel like I'm more confident in knowing exactly

566
00:27:26,800 --> 00:27:29,760
Speaker 1: what I want. Like, I'm not selling, especially not at

567
00:27:29,760 --> 00:27:32,000
Speaker 1: this where I'm at in my life right now.

568
00:27:32,880 --> 00:27:37,879
Speaker 2: Mm hmmm, as we should not absolutely right, right Bama, I'm.

569
00:27:37,800 --> 00:27:42,359
Speaker 1: Letting y'all know now, if I ain't got no my

570
00:27:42,560 --> 00:27:44,720
Speaker 1: next show, I'll be celebrating my first pride.

571
00:27:48,520 --> 00:27:52,760
Speaker 2: No, it's gonna happen. It's going to happen. But if

572
00:27:52,760 --> 00:27:55,000
Speaker 2: that's what you want to celebrate, to celebrate.

573
00:27:54,840 --> 00:27:56,280
Speaker 1: Now, I can't be even no woman, girl, I be

574
00:27:56,320 --> 00:27:59,600
Speaker 1: stressing myself out. I can only imagine what a bitch

575
00:27:59,600 --> 00:28:00,040
Speaker 1: would do the.

576
00:28:01,880 --> 00:28:04,520
Speaker 2: Like I can't even imagine it.

577
00:28:04,920 --> 00:28:11,000
Speaker 1: Yeah. Please, How has celibacy affect your sense of self

578
00:28:11,040 --> 00:28:15,320
Speaker 1: worth and self esteem?

579
00:28:15,760 --> 00:28:18,920
Speaker 3: I would say it allows me to tap it more

580
00:28:19,000 --> 00:28:24,600
Speaker 3: to it because in the dating process, there's all types

581
00:28:24,640 --> 00:28:28,719
Speaker 3: of men out there, and and I'll be honest, I

582
00:28:28,760 --> 00:28:31,520
Speaker 3: haven't always picked the best guy to even talk to

583
00:28:31,880 --> 00:28:36,560
Speaker 3: with knowing my standards. So even recently, I wouldn't say

584
00:28:36,600 --> 00:28:39,200
Speaker 3: I thought I was in love, but I was deeply infatuated.

585
00:28:39,440 --> 00:28:41,200
Speaker 1: This is what the right?

586
00:28:42,200 --> 00:28:45,120
Speaker 2: Yeah, ir yet to go?

587
00:28:46,280 --> 00:28:47,080
Speaker 1: Wasn't that bad?

588
00:28:49,280 --> 00:28:51,080
Speaker 3: I don't know what it was girl, But even to

589
00:28:51,160 --> 00:28:54,000
Speaker 3: this day, like, I still feel really bad. But I

590
00:28:54,040 --> 00:28:57,200
Speaker 3: realized I feel bad because I didn't realize my self

591
00:28:57,280 --> 00:29:01,320
Speaker 3: worth and I let somebody just the way he was

592
00:29:01,360 --> 00:29:04,680
Speaker 3: speaking to me. He didn't yell, a screaming anything like that,

593
00:29:04,720 --> 00:29:07,000
Speaker 3: but he would. I just didn't like his tone and

594
00:29:07,040 --> 00:29:09,480
Speaker 3: like the way he made me feel. And I kept

595
00:29:09,560 --> 00:29:11,880
Speaker 3: trying to brush things underneath the rud enough the rug,

596
00:29:12,000 --> 00:29:12,720
Speaker 3: and I'm just like.

597
00:29:13,040 --> 00:29:15,840
Speaker 2: Do you know who you are? Like you're so special?

598
00:29:15,880 --> 00:29:17,080
Speaker 2: Why are you even putting up with this?

599
00:29:17,920 --> 00:29:21,200
Speaker 3: So I was upset at myself because it took so

600
00:29:21,320 --> 00:29:22,560
Speaker 3: long for me to realize that.

601
00:29:22,600 --> 00:29:24,840
Speaker 2: And I'm just like he was od and like that

602
00:29:26,080 --> 00:29:30,440
Speaker 2: either that or I'm extra sensitive he was.

603
00:29:31,560 --> 00:29:33,840
Speaker 3: It's just that I ignored the red flags. And I had

604
00:29:33,880 --> 00:29:36,080
Speaker 3: to ask myself, why was I ignoring the red flags?

605
00:29:36,440 --> 00:29:38,600
Speaker 3: Is it because I wanted to be in companionship so

606
00:29:38,720 --> 00:29:41,240
Speaker 3: bad that I would allow this to happen?

607
00:29:41,360 --> 00:29:44,520
Speaker 2: So as much as you wanted to be.

608
00:29:44,680 --> 00:29:47,520
Speaker 3: It's okay to be alone someone like you're so much

609
00:29:47,560 --> 00:29:50,120
Speaker 3: more at peace than you were even to try to

610
00:29:50,160 --> 00:29:52,240
Speaker 3: talk to this man, and no shade to him.

611
00:29:52,640 --> 00:29:54,560
Speaker 2: Right, he is who he is and he's gonna.

612
00:29:54,280 --> 00:29:56,880
Speaker 3: Stand in his purpose and I will do that for

613
00:29:56,960 --> 00:29:57,920
Speaker 3: myself as well.

614
00:29:57,760 --> 00:30:01,200
Speaker 2: And we will grow in love apart, right, And that's okay.

615
00:30:02,680 --> 00:30:04,360
Speaker 3: But like for when it comes to self worth, I

616
00:30:04,360 --> 00:30:06,480
Speaker 3: do realize that that's something I need to work.

617
00:30:06,280 --> 00:30:10,800
Speaker 1: On, right, right, Yeah, I'm I'm not compromising my peace.

618
00:30:11,360 --> 00:30:16,400
Speaker 1: I sacrificed a lot to get here, right exactly, I'm

619
00:30:16,440 --> 00:30:19,080
Speaker 1: not my peace. Can't put a price sag on it.

620
00:30:20,000 --> 00:30:22,840
Speaker 3: Exactly, And I just still I'm like, you know, I'm

621
00:30:22,880 --> 00:30:24,600
Speaker 3: so much better off by myself.

622
00:30:25,920 --> 00:30:27,200
Speaker 2: At least he wasn't a child.

623
00:30:27,800 --> 00:30:30,560
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's not yo. I have a question just just

624
00:30:30,560 --> 00:30:32,320
Speaker 1: just came to me, and I'm thinking about the conversation

625
00:30:32,440 --> 00:30:36,520
Speaker 1: we had yesterday. Do you feel bad or do you like,

626
00:30:37,120 --> 00:30:39,479
Speaker 1: do you feel a way when you are engaging like

627
00:30:39,560 --> 00:30:42,160
Speaker 1: in oral sex, like does that make you like feel

628
00:30:43,320 --> 00:30:46,400
Speaker 1: like you feel God or like you're disobeying him?

629
00:30:46,920 --> 00:30:50,080
Speaker 3: The last time I did it, I did, and that's

630
00:30:50,120 --> 00:30:52,680
Speaker 3: why I couldn't and It's why I don't try to

631
00:30:52,680 --> 00:30:55,640
Speaker 3: do it, because the God is gonna be sitting here

632
00:30:55,640 --> 00:30:59,480
Speaker 3: like what happened. I'm like, I can't, I can't finish

633
00:30:59,560 --> 00:31:03,400
Speaker 3: the proper sets because it doesn't feel right. It feels wrong,

634
00:31:05,280 --> 00:31:07,520
Speaker 3: and then you don't either they understand it or they don't.

635
00:31:07,520 --> 00:31:09,680
Speaker 3: But that was only one guy that happened with so far.

636
00:31:10,240 --> 00:31:12,720
Speaker 3: Hopefully I don't do it again, but I do feel bad.

637
00:31:12,800 --> 00:31:15,080
Speaker 3: I'm just like, I think it's a level of conviction.

638
00:31:15,240 --> 00:31:18,360
Speaker 3: Conviction you start to happen when you know where you're

639
00:31:18,400 --> 00:31:22,000
Speaker 3: supposed to go in life and you know what was

640
00:31:22,000 --> 00:31:22,560
Speaker 3: that acting to.

641
00:31:22,560 --> 00:31:26,600
Speaker 2: Get For me? I don't know even on the receiving end.

642
00:31:27,640 --> 00:31:29,840
Speaker 3: The receiving and like the guy, he must have thought

643
00:31:29,880 --> 00:31:31,840
Speaker 3: I liked it, but in my mind, I'm like, I'm

644
00:31:31,880 --> 00:31:33,680
Speaker 3: not even here mentally, or I told him after that,

645
00:31:33,720 --> 00:31:34,840
Speaker 3: I'm like, he ain't not.

646
00:31:37,200 --> 00:31:37,600
Speaker 2: I don't know.

647
00:31:37,680 --> 00:31:42,480
Speaker 3: I just know I didn't like it because mentally I

648
00:31:42,600 --> 00:31:44,600
Speaker 3: was not there, and I told him that. I don't

649
00:31:44,600 --> 00:31:47,959
Speaker 3: think he understands. I'm like, yo, like, this is not

650
00:31:48,000 --> 00:31:50,200
Speaker 3: what I want to happen. And I wasn't into it.

651
00:31:50,240 --> 00:31:51,600
Speaker 3: I probably was faking it, if I'm.

652
00:31:51,480 --> 00:31:54,680
Speaker 1: Being honest, m no, you know what I feel you,

653
00:31:54,720 --> 00:31:57,480
Speaker 1: because I feel like another reason why it's probably taken

654
00:31:57,560 --> 00:32:00,000
Speaker 1: me so long to even like even think about it

655
00:32:00,040 --> 00:32:02,080
Speaker 1: having sex with somebody, because I I don't want to

656
00:32:02,080 --> 00:32:03,960
Speaker 1: disappoint God, like I don't want God to be like

657
00:32:05,720 --> 00:32:07,840
Speaker 1: and then he just takes everything away from me.

658
00:32:07,920 --> 00:32:08,120
Speaker 2: There.

659
00:32:08,160 --> 00:32:10,720
Speaker 1: I work so hard for you, so like I think

660
00:32:10,720 --> 00:32:12,880
Speaker 1: that's another reason why I'm just like really scared because I,

661
00:32:12,960 --> 00:32:14,480
Speaker 1: like you said, I think that when you have that

662
00:32:14,600 --> 00:32:17,800
Speaker 1: strong conviction, like you're not trying to like you, you

663
00:32:17,880 --> 00:32:19,720
Speaker 1: put too much and sacrifice too much to get to

664
00:32:19,720 --> 00:32:21,720
Speaker 1: where you at mm hmm.

665
00:32:22,160 --> 00:32:26,280
Speaker 3: Absolutely, and then also with it, it's just like so

666
00:32:26,320 --> 00:32:29,520
Speaker 3: when that happened, you know, you can't be hard on yourself.

667
00:32:30,080 --> 00:32:34,880
Speaker 2: Yeah, we are born sinners, but yes, so for me,

668
00:32:35,320 --> 00:32:35,680
Speaker 2: like I.

669
00:32:35,600 --> 00:32:39,040
Speaker 3: Said, I know, do not go behind closed doors right

670
00:32:39,080 --> 00:32:41,960
Speaker 3: now with the men, I don't have the strength, Like

671
00:32:42,000 --> 00:32:44,400
Speaker 3: the spirit is strong, but the flesh is weak. I'm

672
00:32:44,440 --> 00:32:49,480
Speaker 3: just at a weak place right now. I do not go.

673
00:32:50,200 --> 00:32:52,360
Speaker 3: And it's like I notice about myself now. So that's

674
00:32:52,400 --> 00:32:54,680
Speaker 3: something like I have to uphold because if a guy

675
00:32:54,720 --> 00:32:56,440
Speaker 3: invites you over, of course you gonna tell you come over.

676
00:32:56,480 --> 00:32:58,000
Speaker 3: But I have to be strugg enough to say, hey,

677
00:32:58,560 --> 00:33:00,320
Speaker 3: I don't want to do that right now. We could

678
00:33:00,360 --> 00:33:04,440
Speaker 3: go go to the park, go see a movie. I

679
00:33:04,480 --> 00:33:05,680
Speaker 3: just can't be behind closed.

680
00:33:05,400 --> 00:33:07,800
Speaker 1: Doors, right So what is it gonna take for you

681
00:33:07,840 --> 00:33:09,000
Speaker 1: to start having sex?

682
00:33:09,040 --> 00:33:09,120
Speaker 3: Like?

683
00:33:09,120 --> 00:33:11,080
Speaker 1: What does a partner needs to do or how does

684
00:33:11,080 --> 00:33:13,479
Speaker 1: he need to make you feel in order for you

685
00:33:13,560 --> 00:33:16,240
Speaker 1: to be like, Okay, this might be it.

686
00:33:19,880 --> 00:33:20,120
Speaker 2: One.

687
00:33:20,200 --> 00:33:23,840
Speaker 3: I want my partners to have a spiritual relationship with God.

688
00:33:24,560 --> 00:33:28,120
Speaker 3: I think because I waited this long and I haven't

689
00:33:28,160 --> 00:33:33,000
Speaker 3: met another man who has the same amount of conviction

690
00:33:33,240 --> 00:33:36,840
Speaker 3: or even wants to live the same lifestyle I have,

691
00:33:37,200 --> 00:33:39,520
Speaker 3: I probably need to find somebody who wants to do

692
00:33:39,560 --> 00:33:41,040
Speaker 3: the same thing that I want to do. So I

693
00:33:41,080 --> 00:33:43,959
Speaker 3: am wait until marriage at least I'm trying to Oh

694
00:33:44,040 --> 00:33:49,800
Speaker 3: you are I'm trying, I really am, because sometimes I'm like, well,

695
00:33:49,840 --> 00:33:53,560
Speaker 3: if I waited this long, I don't know who, Like,

696
00:33:53,920 --> 00:33:55,000
Speaker 3: why am I going to do it now?

697
00:33:55,040 --> 00:33:58,360
Speaker 2: Who is so special that I'm like this is it? Like?

698
00:33:58,480 --> 00:34:02,360
Speaker 3: I have those answerious, But I figure if we follow

699
00:34:02,400 --> 00:34:05,400
Speaker 3: the same doctrine and if we have similar beliefs, then

700
00:34:05,720 --> 00:34:07,520
Speaker 3: we would do it the same way. M.

701
00:34:09,080 --> 00:34:13,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's beautiful, Thank you.

702
00:34:13,040 --> 00:34:15,120
Speaker 2: I'll invite you to the wedding if it happened that way.

703
00:34:15,040 --> 00:34:16,960
Speaker 1: Yes, please, I'm gonna do a follow up.

704
00:34:19,800 --> 00:34:20,080
Speaker 2: Girl.

705
00:34:20,440 --> 00:34:23,840
Speaker 3: I actually met a woman one time years ago and

706
00:34:23,880 --> 00:34:26,080
Speaker 3: she said she waited and she said, the experience was

707
00:34:26,120 --> 00:34:28,520
Speaker 3: so beautiful. And you know, you'll hear everybody say, oh,

708
00:34:28,600 --> 00:34:30,759
Speaker 3: sex is the bomb, it's great. Oh, sure you did this,

709
00:34:30,840 --> 00:34:33,880
Speaker 3: but she was like, no, it's a difference and you

710
00:34:33,960 --> 00:34:36,719
Speaker 3: not kind of want to experience it that but within

711
00:34:36,760 --> 00:34:40,680
Speaker 3: the same breath, right. I think people need to understand

712
00:34:40,680 --> 00:34:43,279
Speaker 3: that you have to learn your partner. You have to

713
00:34:43,360 --> 00:34:45,080
Speaker 3: learn what they like. You have to know what their

714
00:34:45,120 --> 00:34:47,680
Speaker 3: mindset is. It's not all about they look good like.

715
00:34:47,800 --> 00:34:51,359
Speaker 3: It's such a more intricate process. So it really needs

716
00:34:51,360 --> 00:34:54,399
Speaker 3: to be somebody special and that somebody that says God

717
00:34:54,560 --> 00:34:55,919
Speaker 3: says like this person is.

718
00:34:55,840 --> 00:34:59,759
Speaker 1: For you, listen. I don't like to talk about celebrity

719
00:35:00,000 --> 00:35:04,799
Speaker 1: relationships because some of them just be fake, right, But

720
00:35:04,920 --> 00:35:09,040
Speaker 1: I will say, if this is fake, they are doing

721
00:35:09,080 --> 00:35:10,560
Speaker 1: the hell of a job. And I don't think it's

722
00:35:10,600 --> 00:35:13,920
Speaker 1: fake at all. But I really like the way jay

723
00:35:14,040 --> 00:35:17,839
Speaker 1: Z and Beyonce are with each other, like you can

724
00:35:17,920 --> 00:35:22,080
Speaker 1: tell like they're each other's soulmates, Like and I'm not

725
00:35:22,120 --> 00:35:24,680
Speaker 1: talking about all the every all the Scanner's allegation with

726
00:35:24,800 --> 00:35:26,680
Speaker 1: the case. Maybe it's just like you just know, when

727
00:35:26,719 --> 00:35:28,640
Speaker 1: you look at a couple, you can just be like, nah,

728
00:35:28,920 --> 00:35:30,759
Speaker 1: you can see you can feel the love. And I

729
00:35:30,880 --> 00:35:33,879
Speaker 1: want to love so intense that it makes people uncomfortable,

730
00:35:35,560 --> 00:35:37,080
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying. So it's like when you

731
00:35:37,120 --> 00:35:39,000
Speaker 1: look at certain people, like even when I'm on a

732
00:35:39,080 --> 00:35:42,200
Speaker 1: train and I'm seeing older people, I'm even seeing younger

733
00:35:42,200 --> 00:35:44,640
Speaker 1: people and I'm just like, wow, like you can tell

734
00:35:44,680 --> 00:35:49,520
Speaker 1: they fuck with each other, Like that's what I want

735
00:35:50,120 --> 00:35:50,560
Speaker 1: me too.

736
00:35:52,160 --> 00:35:54,879
Speaker 3: But when I see it, like not say you're hating

737
00:35:54,920 --> 00:35:56,319
Speaker 3: because I don't think you're hating that all. Like we

738
00:35:56,520 --> 00:35:59,360
Speaker 3: realize that we're seeing it. It's like it's commendable. But

739
00:35:59,520 --> 00:36:01,239
Speaker 3: like some times we don't know what these people go

740
00:36:01,320 --> 00:36:02,640
Speaker 3: through to get to where they.

741
00:36:02,600 --> 00:36:07,759
Speaker 1: Are, right, But I do believe that, I do believe that.

742
00:36:09,239 --> 00:36:10,799
Speaker 1: I don't know if I'm using the right words, but

743
00:36:10,880 --> 00:36:12,879
Speaker 1: I do feel like love is work.

744
00:36:15,200 --> 00:36:17,400
Speaker 2: And that's the thing I think.

745
00:36:17,680 --> 00:36:21,319
Speaker 1: I think that people people have this idea of love

746
00:36:21,400 --> 00:36:24,040
Speaker 1: being easy, love being all these other things. And I'm

747
00:36:24,080 --> 00:36:26,520
Speaker 1: not talking about you know, disrespect and stuff like that

748
00:36:26,560 --> 00:36:29,240
Speaker 1: because some things I don't tolerate. But I do feel

749
00:36:29,239 --> 00:36:33,080
Speaker 1: like just being in regular relationships with your homegirls, your parents,

750
00:36:33,080 --> 00:36:36,280
Speaker 1: what the case may be. Like, relationships are not easy.

751
00:36:39,080 --> 00:36:39,440
Speaker 2: It's not.

752
00:36:39,680 --> 00:36:42,480
Speaker 3: That's why I'd be like, they look good, my friends

753
00:36:42,480 --> 00:36:45,280
Speaker 3: be looking good. But I'm like, what am I gonna

754
00:36:45,320 --> 00:36:47,799
Speaker 3: do if this man upsets? Because I'll be ready to leave.

755
00:36:47,840 --> 00:36:50,680
Speaker 3: I'm like, oh, you said, what all right, I can't

756
00:36:50,680 --> 00:36:53,040
Speaker 3: be a relationship. I'm like, oh, you don't like, okay, bye?

757
00:36:53,280 --> 00:36:55,840
Speaker 3: But I know that's not that's not going to sustain

758
00:36:55,960 --> 00:36:58,680
Speaker 3: anybody's relationship if I have that mindset.

759
00:36:58,200 --> 00:36:59,839
Speaker 2: And I'm still working on that.

760
00:37:00,080 --> 00:37:03,320
Speaker 3: So, like you said, it is a work that people

761
00:37:03,520 --> 00:37:06,560
Speaker 3: have to do, and I just hope that I am

762
00:37:06,600 --> 00:37:08,960
Speaker 3: prepared to deal with it or know how to deal

763
00:37:09,000 --> 00:37:10,920
Speaker 3: with it when that time comes.

764
00:37:11,239 --> 00:37:13,680
Speaker 1: And I think what's most important is to have somebody

765
00:37:13,719 --> 00:37:15,799
Speaker 1: that want it just as bad as you do. If

766
00:37:15,840 --> 00:37:17,319
Speaker 1: I know you want it just as bad as I do,

767
00:37:17,360 --> 00:37:22,320
Speaker 1: then I'm listen. If you're rocking, I'm rolling, I'm so cute.

768
00:37:22,320 --> 00:37:23,960
Speaker 2: I feel you one type of sign.

769
00:37:24,160 --> 00:37:27,160
Speaker 1: Yeah it's hard O hear shit Like it's it's hard

770
00:37:27,200 --> 00:37:28,920
Speaker 1: to find good people, So let alone to be able

771
00:37:28,960 --> 00:37:31,680
Speaker 1: to share the most sacred thing that you have to

772
00:37:31,680 --> 00:37:33,920
Speaker 1: give to somebody, which is your your body, your spirit,

773
00:37:33,960 --> 00:37:37,600
Speaker 1: your soul, everything, Like we gotta be tapped in Nigga,

774
00:37:38,040 --> 00:37:38,560
Speaker 1: I know.

775
00:37:38,880 --> 00:37:41,239
Speaker 2: Right, Yeah, gotta be selective.

776
00:37:41,400 --> 00:37:44,200
Speaker 3: Like and I always say this to every and anybody,

777
00:37:44,680 --> 00:37:45,600
Speaker 3: even if i'mdating you or not.

778
00:37:45,680 --> 00:37:47,440
Speaker 2: I'm like, everybody doesn't deserve you.

779
00:37:47,560 --> 00:37:48,400
Speaker 1: Yeah, do you?

780
00:37:48,600 --> 00:37:50,520
Speaker 2: Why do you think, oh you could just get a

781
00:37:50,560 --> 00:37:53,040
Speaker 2: piece of or you should share it? Like? Why? Right?

782
00:37:53,200 --> 00:37:54,000
Speaker 2: Why do you want to do.

783
00:37:54,000 --> 00:37:56,320
Speaker 3: That because it feel good for two seconds? Are you

784
00:37:56,360 --> 00:37:59,920
Speaker 3: feeling a void? Is there trauma where you're sexual sexually abused?

785
00:37:59,920 --> 00:38:02,560
Speaker 3: Like there's so many reasons why people even want to

786
00:38:02,600 --> 00:38:03,319
Speaker 3: engage in sex.

787
00:38:03,360 --> 00:38:04,759
Speaker 2: Are you following culture? So?

788
00:38:05,080 --> 00:38:08,719
Speaker 1: Yeah? So, in what ways does your faith provide guidance

789
00:38:08,760 --> 00:38:10,920
Speaker 1: and support and maintainance celibacy?

790
00:38:12,840 --> 00:38:15,200
Speaker 2: Hm? Hmmm, probably need some more support.

791
00:38:16,239 --> 00:38:23,359
Speaker 3: I'm being honest, m because it gets hard, especially if

792
00:38:23,360 --> 00:38:25,719
Speaker 3: I'm dating somebody, like I slip up.

793
00:38:26,239 --> 00:38:28,520
Speaker 2: But can you repeat the question please? I can process it.

794
00:38:28,560 --> 00:38:31,960
Speaker 1: Property Yeah, So, in what ways does your faith provide

795
00:38:32,000 --> 00:38:34,520
Speaker 1: guidance and support and maintaining celibacy?

796
00:38:36,880 --> 00:38:36,960
Speaker 2: So?

797
00:38:37,080 --> 00:38:41,800
Speaker 3: When I read the Bible, for instance, this past week,

798
00:38:41,960 --> 00:38:44,840
Speaker 3: my friends and I about three of us. We have

799
00:38:45,000 --> 00:38:49,080
Speaker 3: Bible study for every week. Once a week. We were

800
00:38:49,120 --> 00:38:52,400
Speaker 3: reading the Book of Genesis, and you know, I start

801
00:38:52,480 --> 00:38:56,560
Speaker 3: paying attention to the directions God gives people.

802
00:38:56,880 --> 00:38:59,920
Speaker 2: So for instance, I like this talk.

803
00:39:01,600 --> 00:39:02,800
Speaker 1: PhD to church.

804
00:39:05,440 --> 00:39:09,040
Speaker 3: So we were reading about Noah before the flood came,

805
00:39:09,640 --> 00:39:13,279
Speaker 3: and God God gave Noah specific directions. He says, make

806
00:39:13,320 --> 00:39:15,759
Speaker 3: this arc, make it this amount of centimeters, make it

807
00:39:15,760 --> 00:39:19,240
Speaker 3: this wide, make it this high. And then one point

808
00:39:19,239 --> 00:39:21,719
Speaker 3: that we brought up, we was just like, these directions

809
00:39:21,760 --> 00:39:25,360
Speaker 3: are so specific, And I said to mysel ourselves were.

810
00:39:25,280 --> 00:39:27,360
Speaker 2: Like, we wonder what if Noah didn't listen?

811
00:39:28,560 --> 00:39:31,840
Speaker 3: What if he made the arc forty four centimeters as

812
00:39:31,880 --> 00:39:34,279
Speaker 3: opposed to fifty to whatever the SENTI I don't know

813
00:39:34,440 --> 00:39:37,279
Speaker 3: actual figures, like what if he didn't do that, what

814
00:39:37,320 --> 00:39:40,319
Speaker 3: would his life have been like? But Noah was able

815
00:39:40,360 --> 00:39:44,200
Speaker 3: to follow, he was chosen, he was able to survive

816
00:39:44,320 --> 00:39:47,160
Speaker 3: the flood, he was able to procreate and set the

817
00:39:47,160 --> 00:39:50,880
Speaker 3: segway for generations and generations to come. So it's moment

818
00:39:51,080 --> 00:39:54,839
Speaker 3: like those that helped me with celibacy because I know

819
00:39:54,880 --> 00:39:57,080
Speaker 3: he wants me to live a certain lifestyle, not to

820
00:39:57,120 --> 00:39:59,239
Speaker 3: say like I'm a saying, because I'm not, but I'm

821
00:39:59,280 --> 00:40:04,359
Speaker 3: trying to live accordingly and I believe that God wants

822
00:40:04,400 --> 00:40:05,320
Speaker 3: to protect us.

823
00:40:05,840 --> 00:40:07,560
Speaker 2: Right, So you have a choice either you listen or

824
00:40:07,560 --> 00:40:08,080
Speaker 2: you don't.

825
00:40:08,160 --> 00:40:10,919
Speaker 3: So when I read things like that, when I talk

826
00:40:11,000 --> 00:40:15,240
Speaker 3: to people who understands or have similar experiences, it makes

827
00:40:15,239 --> 00:40:17,319
Speaker 3: the process more worthwhile.

828
00:40:18,160 --> 00:40:20,719
Speaker 2: Well, I don't feel like I'm doing something that's out

829
00:40:20,719 --> 00:40:23,920
Speaker 2: of the norm or whack, if you will.

830
00:40:23,920 --> 00:40:26,680
Speaker 1: Right, I feel like you got way, you got way

831
00:40:26,719 --> 00:40:28,960
Speaker 1: more comfortable once I start sharing my story with you.

832
00:40:30,280 --> 00:40:34,440
Speaker 1: Pro believe yeah, because I feel like my next question

833
00:40:34,600 --> 00:40:37,080
Speaker 1: is do you believe that being celibate has deepened your

834
00:40:37,120 --> 00:40:40,480
Speaker 1: spiritual connection or enhance it? And I feel like it

835
00:40:40,600 --> 00:40:43,680
Speaker 1: definitely deepened my relationship with God. Like me and God,

836
00:40:43,719 --> 00:40:46,719
Speaker 1: we see we were on the same page, reading the

837
00:40:46,800 --> 00:40:50,440
Speaker 1: same senses, on the same word, Like, I feel like

838
00:40:50,480 --> 00:40:53,560
Speaker 1: we are so locked in. So I feel like just

839
00:40:53,600 --> 00:40:56,040
Speaker 1: hearing you and like speaking to you and like, you know,

840
00:40:56,600 --> 00:40:58,200
Speaker 1: having a conversation with you. I feel like you feel

841
00:40:58,200 --> 00:40:59,960
Speaker 1: the same way.

842
00:41:00,160 --> 00:41:03,480
Speaker 3: Sure, yeah, definitely, And thank you for being very transparent

843
00:41:03,600 --> 00:41:07,319
Speaker 3: with me. It's actually nice to meet somebody for the

844
00:41:07,320 --> 00:41:10,800
Speaker 3: first time on this platform and just speak so candidly

845
00:41:10,800 --> 00:41:14,560
Speaker 3: about the experience as well, but like having that faith

846
00:41:14,600 --> 00:41:19,439
Speaker 3: based definitely, definitely like and I noticed in my life

847
00:41:19,480 --> 00:41:23,440
Speaker 3: once I take God out, things just go downhill, like

848
00:41:23,760 --> 00:41:25,000
Speaker 3: everything is wrong.

849
00:41:25,560 --> 00:41:27,759
Speaker 2: I'm like, oh my God, that's how you know that

850
00:41:27,960 --> 00:41:29,479
Speaker 2: is real? Right?

851
00:41:29,800 --> 00:41:31,400
Speaker 3: And it's not to say, as Questians we're not going

852
00:41:31,440 --> 00:41:33,520
Speaker 3: to struggle. It does tell us that we are going

853
00:41:33,560 --> 00:41:35,160
Speaker 3: to struggle. It's just a matter of how you deal

854
00:41:35,200 --> 00:41:37,279
Speaker 3: with to struggle, who you lean on, who you rely on.

855
00:41:38,400 --> 00:41:40,680
Speaker 3: Are you relying on your boats, are you relying on

856
00:41:40,760 --> 00:41:43,960
Speaker 3: God's word and your prayer life or those people who

857
00:41:44,000 --> 00:41:46,840
Speaker 3: can help you get through whatever situation it is?

858
00:41:46,960 --> 00:41:49,560
Speaker 1: What's the scripture? I be butchering scriptures, but we'll say

859
00:41:49,680 --> 00:41:50,879
Speaker 1: lean into him.

860
00:41:51,080 --> 00:41:54,440
Speaker 3: But you understand, yes, it's not your own understanding.

861
00:41:54,280 --> 00:41:56,920
Speaker 2: They just do to me. I'm not quoting girl.

862
00:41:56,760 --> 00:41:59,000
Speaker 1: But I think, yeah, I mean paraphrases.

863
00:42:00,360 --> 00:42:02,640
Speaker 2: Well, we know in the book, you know what I'm

864
00:42:02,640 --> 00:42:09,600
Speaker 2: trying to say. So this girl, Oh my gosh.

865
00:42:09,640 --> 00:42:12,640
Speaker 1: So how has practice and celibacy shaped your overall sense

866
00:42:12,680 --> 00:42:14,760
Speaker 1: of identity and fulfillment in life?

867
00:42:17,160 --> 00:42:17,560
Speaker 2: I don't.

868
00:42:18,520 --> 00:42:21,160
Speaker 3: I don't think I ever thought about it like that. Honestly,

869
00:42:23,760 --> 00:42:29,720
Speaker 3: I think I'm on a journey and I'm still trying

870
00:42:29,719 --> 00:42:33,600
Speaker 3: to figure out where the sellers be. The celibacy is

871
00:42:33,600 --> 00:42:37,000
Speaker 3: going to lead or take me, and I think it's

872
00:42:37,320 --> 00:42:38,360
Speaker 3: one aspect.

873
00:42:38,000 --> 00:42:39,160
Speaker 2: Of my life.

874
00:42:40,400 --> 00:42:43,799
Speaker 3: I do think it has kept me moving on with

875
00:42:43,920 --> 00:42:48,040
Speaker 3: everything else and like seeing to fruition, like my goals

876
00:42:48,080 --> 00:42:52,839
Speaker 3: and aspirations. I don't think I would have been where

877
00:42:52,840 --> 00:42:55,279
Speaker 3: I am today if I were to engage or have

878
00:42:55,360 --> 00:42:57,400
Speaker 3: sex with somebody that he didn't prepare for.

879
00:43:13,880 --> 00:43:14,360
Speaker 1: Fact.

880
00:43:15,760 --> 00:43:20,680
Speaker 3: Baby, yeah, I think you know, having kids is a blessing,

881
00:43:20,719 --> 00:43:23,000
Speaker 3: but I don't think that's in my cards right now.

882
00:43:24,520 --> 00:43:26,760
Speaker 3: I think I've been not saying you're not gonna experience

883
00:43:26,800 --> 00:43:30,840
Speaker 3: hardage because you will sex or not. But I think

884
00:43:31,000 --> 00:43:32,640
Speaker 3: just God has a way of keeping me safe or

885
00:43:32,719 --> 00:43:36,040
Speaker 3: keeping us safe once we lean on him. If we

886
00:43:36,040 --> 00:43:37,520
Speaker 3: think we can do this on our own and just

887
00:43:37,520 --> 00:43:38,960
Speaker 3: have a little bit of fun here and there or

888
00:43:39,040 --> 00:43:41,879
Speaker 3: who we want, then we gonna see what that gets us.

889
00:43:41,880 --> 00:43:44,040
Speaker 3: And it's different for everybody. Sometimes it's a great outcome

890
00:43:44,040 --> 00:43:46,960
Speaker 3: and sometimes it's not. But I don't believe. I don't

891
00:43:46,960 --> 00:43:49,960
Speaker 3: think about myself. I'll be like, oh, y'all even think

892
00:43:49,960 --> 00:43:53,920
Speaker 3: about it. I just like I'm mean, I'm here. I'm

893
00:43:53,960 --> 00:43:55,399
Speaker 3: in the now. I'm living in a moment, but I've

894
00:43:55,400 --> 00:43:58,360
Speaker 3: also prepared myself for the next steps of life. And

895
00:43:58,400 --> 00:43:59,920
Speaker 3: I don't have all those answers, but I know I

896
00:44:00,120 --> 00:44:03,000
Speaker 3: believe in God and He's gonna help me get to

897
00:44:03,040 --> 00:44:04,160
Speaker 3: that next place in my life.

898
00:44:04,440 --> 00:44:07,600
Speaker 1: Right. I'm just curious, do you wish looking back, do

899
00:44:07,680 --> 00:44:09,560
Speaker 1: you wish that your mom would have had a conversation

900
00:44:09,640 --> 00:44:10,480
Speaker 1: with you about sex.

901
00:44:12,520 --> 00:44:17,080
Speaker 2: I wish so many women would. Hmm, I wish, I

902
00:44:17,080 --> 00:44:17,560
Speaker 2: wish I could.

903
00:44:17,560 --> 00:44:19,279
Speaker 3: You're gonna make me cry. I wish I could have

904
00:44:19,440 --> 00:44:24,960
Speaker 3: just had that, But I didn't. And I think because

905
00:44:25,000 --> 00:44:27,319
Speaker 3: what I learned. You know, parents, they experience their own

906
00:44:27,320 --> 00:44:30,319
Speaker 3: sexual traumas and they try to shelter the child. And

907
00:44:30,360 --> 00:44:32,560
Speaker 3: it's just like, maybe she didn't know how to have

908
00:44:32,680 --> 00:44:34,280
Speaker 3: this conversation with her oldest daughter.

909
00:44:34,600 --> 00:44:36,080
Speaker 2: And this is not me covering her.

910
00:44:36,680 --> 00:44:40,600
Speaker 3: This is just me being mature about the situation and

911
00:44:40,680 --> 00:44:42,839
Speaker 3: knowing where seeing the type of life My mom had

912
00:44:42,960 --> 00:44:46,080
Speaker 3: not to say she was wild, but she probably didn't know.

913
00:44:46,120 --> 00:44:48,680
Speaker 3: And for my other three sisters, I'm sure the conversation

914
00:44:48,760 --> 00:44:52,239
Speaker 3: has not been had as well. But I had one

915
00:44:52,239 --> 00:44:56,239
Speaker 3: grandmother who was very candid. She would just be like, yeah,

916
00:44:56,239 --> 00:44:57,839
Speaker 3: if you want to God at night, here's my key.

917
00:44:57,960 --> 00:45:02,600
Speaker 3: She's like, yeah, gonna get pregnant. I'm like, okay, that.

918
00:45:02,640 --> 00:45:05,920
Speaker 2: Was granny right right. And then I had one aunt,

919
00:45:06,040 --> 00:45:08,239
Speaker 2: this is on my dad's side. She was very candy.

920
00:45:08,360 --> 00:45:11,160
Speaker 2: She was like, listen to me, girl, don't get pregnant.

921
00:45:12,120 --> 00:45:14,440
Speaker 3: But I think, you know, I appreciate that, but I

922
00:45:14,480 --> 00:45:18,400
Speaker 3: needed more like how you love yourself.

923
00:45:19,760 --> 00:45:21,600
Speaker 2: When the time is right. How do you know that

924
00:45:21,880 --> 00:45:23,399
Speaker 2: this man is for you? How do you know that

925
00:45:23,640 --> 00:45:24,319
Speaker 2: what is love?

926
00:45:24,440 --> 00:45:28,120
Speaker 3: But I think sometimes females they go through their own trauma,

927
00:45:28,160 --> 00:45:30,920
Speaker 3: they don't know how to do it. So I mean,

928
00:45:30,960 --> 00:45:33,680
Speaker 3: I hope now that I'm a woman, I can inspire

929
00:45:33,880 --> 00:45:36,680
Speaker 3: another young woman or any woman for that matter, and

930
00:45:36,800 --> 00:45:38,680
Speaker 3: just help them to see their self forth so that

931
00:45:38,800 --> 00:45:40,399
Speaker 3: you know, if they decide to do it, at least

932
00:45:40,400 --> 00:45:43,439
Speaker 3: they have some type of instruction because it just would

933
00:45:43,480 --> 00:45:43,959
Speaker 3: have been nice.

934
00:45:44,000 --> 00:45:48,160
Speaker 1: But yeah, I mean, you do that being that you're

935
00:45:48,160 --> 00:45:50,880
Speaker 1: the oldest, that you have conversations with your your younger

936
00:45:50,920 --> 00:45:51,600
Speaker 1: siblings or.

937
00:45:55,400 --> 00:45:59,960
Speaker 2: Not in total. So I'm thirty four.

938
00:46:00,520 --> 00:46:03,760
Speaker 3: My sisters are right now twenty five and twenty seven.

939
00:46:04,840 --> 00:46:06,640
Speaker 2: I try to sneak my way in there.

940
00:46:08,440 --> 00:46:11,200
Speaker 3: Because they're close Serenade, not even because of that, Like

941
00:46:11,320 --> 00:46:14,200
Speaker 3: we just didn't have this close close relationship. But you know,

942
00:46:14,239 --> 00:46:16,799
Speaker 3: I've asked, oh, so, who you're dating now that you're

943
00:46:16,800 --> 00:46:17,360
Speaker 3: in college.

944
00:46:18,480 --> 00:46:20,680
Speaker 2: One sibling I'm sure is homosexual.

945
00:46:21,239 --> 00:46:21,640
Speaker 1: Mmm.

946
00:46:21,800 --> 00:46:23,600
Speaker 3: So now I phrase it that way specific because I

947
00:46:23,600 --> 00:46:25,319
Speaker 3: don't want to make her feel like, oh you're like,

948
00:46:25,719 --> 00:46:28,839
Speaker 3: I don't care if that's what you wanted to want.

949
00:46:29,120 --> 00:46:29,840
Speaker 1: Just say lesbian.

950
00:46:31,520 --> 00:46:33,520
Speaker 2: That's right. I haven't in that way to her.

951
00:46:34,000 --> 00:46:35,279
Speaker 1: That's why I know you be in the church.

952
00:46:37,200 --> 00:46:39,759
Speaker 2: That's terrible. And see how terrible the church is with

953
00:46:39,840 --> 00:46:40,359
Speaker 2: that whole thing.

954
00:46:40,560 --> 00:46:44,160
Speaker 1: No, I know, I know, I'll make it.

955
00:46:44,160 --> 00:46:45,000
Speaker 2: It's terrible.

956
00:46:45,760 --> 00:46:47,640
Speaker 3: No, if I tell you about my church, it's so

957
00:46:47,840 --> 00:46:52,520
Speaker 3: bad anyway. Yeah, but with that sister, I was just

958
00:46:52,600 --> 00:46:56,200
Speaker 3: cautious because she has never said that she is, So

959
00:46:56,280 --> 00:46:58,280
Speaker 3: I don't want to assume that that's.

960
00:46:58,080 --> 00:47:01,120
Speaker 2: How, you know, because I know.

961
00:47:02,120 --> 00:47:04,520
Speaker 1: Like, is she giving off like stub vibes?

962
00:47:05,239 --> 00:47:09,839
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, I know, I know, I know, And I

963
00:47:09,960 --> 00:47:13,520
Speaker 3: just wanted to make her feel comfortable. So until she

964
00:47:13,680 --> 00:47:15,880
Speaker 3: tells me like, hey, you know, I got a girl,

965
00:47:15,960 --> 00:47:17,160
Speaker 3: I didn't want to put that on her.

966
00:47:17,160 --> 00:47:19,160
Speaker 2: So I just phrased it as, Okay, what's your dating

967
00:47:19,200 --> 00:47:20,160
Speaker 2: life like? And she was like.

968
00:47:21,920 --> 00:47:23,880
Speaker 1: Wow wow.

969
00:47:24,200 --> 00:47:27,400
Speaker 3: So then the other sister, she has had a couple

970
00:47:27,440 --> 00:47:29,680
Speaker 3: of partners, so we've discussed it. I just tell you

971
00:47:29,760 --> 00:47:32,239
Speaker 3: how to protect yourself, you know, be careful out there,

972
00:47:33,200 --> 00:47:35,799
Speaker 3: take your time, you don't need to rush type of thing.

973
00:47:38,600 --> 00:47:41,800
Speaker 3: But yeah, that's where that goes. So I'm not a

974
00:47:41,880 --> 00:47:45,839
Speaker 3: mother Teresa, right, but I was a listening the heir. Yeah,

975
00:47:46,000 --> 00:47:49,640
Speaker 3: I will give advice, I will ask questions, and they

976
00:47:49,760 --> 00:47:53,239
Speaker 3: know I could call them anytime, facetim them. And fortunately

977
00:47:53,480 --> 00:47:56,520
Speaker 3: they have allowed me to like insert myself in their

978
00:47:56,560 --> 00:47:58,759
Speaker 3: lives because you can see his older sister calling me

979
00:47:58,880 --> 00:48:01,719
Speaker 3: like decline, but I can confidently say I always get

980
00:48:01,719 --> 00:48:03,799
Speaker 3: a call back, always get a hey, what's up?

981
00:48:03,960 --> 00:48:06,160
Speaker 2: You call me? Like, so you know the door is

982
00:48:06,160 --> 00:48:06,880
Speaker 2: still open for that.

983
00:48:07,040 --> 00:48:09,160
Speaker 1: No, I think it's very important that sisters, that we

984
00:48:09,239 --> 00:48:12,440
Speaker 1: all should be talking about certain about everything, especially when

985
00:48:12,440 --> 00:48:15,120
Speaker 1: it comes to sexual health, because I feel like I'm

986
00:48:15,120 --> 00:48:16,680
Speaker 1: not putting this on niggas because you can get shit

987
00:48:16,680 --> 00:48:19,319
Speaker 1: from bitches too, but you know there's some shit out there.

988
00:48:20,560 --> 00:48:24,040
Speaker 1: And I'm super super super super big on like getting

989
00:48:24,040 --> 00:48:28,279
Speaker 1: tested and like just communicated and like just being very,

990
00:48:30,000 --> 00:48:33,960
Speaker 1: very cautious and aware of people you share your body with.

991
00:48:34,040 --> 00:48:38,200
Speaker 1: Because my grandmother, my grandmother Rose, she died of aids

992
00:48:38,280 --> 00:48:41,120
Speaker 1: from her husband and she didn't know that, but granted

993
00:48:41,160 --> 00:48:43,839
Speaker 1: he got it from because he was sharing needles. But

994
00:48:44,360 --> 00:48:46,480
Speaker 1: you know, I feel like, I go, I'm really passionate

995
00:48:46,520 --> 00:48:48,160
Speaker 1: about this because I feel like she didn't have a

996
00:48:48,239 --> 00:48:50,560
Speaker 1: chance to share her story, you know, so I just

997
00:48:50,600 --> 00:48:53,000
Speaker 1: be one of people just to protect themselves because man,

998
00:48:53,040 --> 00:48:54,560
Speaker 1: all it takes is a couple of seconds.

999
00:48:56,160 --> 00:48:56,960
Speaker 2: That's so true.

1000
00:48:57,600 --> 00:49:00,160
Speaker 3: Thank you for sharing that.

1001
00:48:59,160 --> 00:49:04,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, Like I'm gonna if y'all read my love letters,

1002
00:49:04,800 --> 00:49:09,759
Speaker 1: they all the one right, Yes, yes, I'm gonna share

1003
00:49:09,800 --> 00:49:12,279
Speaker 1: her story. It's so dope. But like I never got

1004
00:49:12,280 --> 00:49:14,759
Speaker 1: a chance to meet her. But she was just beautiful,

1005
00:49:14,800 --> 00:49:16,360
Speaker 1: Like I'm gonna see you the picture of her, but

1006
00:49:16,480 --> 00:49:19,080
Speaker 1: she was just a tall, beautiful like she's like a model,

1007
00:49:19,440 --> 00:49:22,680
Speaker 1: long black hair like she was. People think that that

1008
00:49:22,719 --> 00:49:25,200
Speaker 1: it's me. And when I heard her story, like it

1009
00:49:25,360 --> 00:49:27,880
Speaker 1: just broke my heart. Like and then the crazy thing is,

1010
00:49:28,320 --> 00:49:30,239
Speaker 1: you know, sometimes we stay out of we stay in

1011
00:49:30,280 --> 00:49:33,759
Speaker 1: situation because of love. And my grandmother stayed with him

1012
00:49:33,760 --> 00:49:36,279
Speaker 1: and took care of him, and you know, she didn't

1013
00:49:36,280 --> 00:49:38,000
Speaker 1: want any medication or anything because she was like, that's

1014
00:49:38,000 --> 00:49:42,879
Speaker 1: the only man that ever loved me. Yeah. So it's

1015
00:49:42,960 --> 00:49:48,320
Speaker 1: just heartbreaking, like, you know, especially with these niggas, Child.

1016
00:49:49,840 --> 00:49:54,040
Speaker 2: These niggas for me, Did she passed away before your grandfather?

1017
00:49:55,560 --> 00:49:58,279
Speaker 1: Yeah, she passed away after him, so she took care

1018
00:49:58,320 --> 00:50:01,440
Speaker 1: of him on his dying bed, and she was just

1019
00:50:01,520 --> 00:50:02,239
Speaker 1: like fuck it.

1020
00:50:04,200 --> 00:50:04,400
Speaker 2: You know.

1021
00:50:04,640 --> 00:50:06,560
Speaker 1: So I go super hard, especially when it comes to

1022
00:50:06,680 --> 00:50:10,000
Speaker 1: HIV and AIDS, because that's something that really, uh fucked

1023
00:50:10,040 --> 00:50:14,480
Speaker 1: up our community really bad, especially when it comes to

1024
00:50:14,480 --> 00:50:14,960
Speaker 1: black women.

1025
00:50:15,840 --> 00:50:16,080
Speaker 2: Child.

1026
00:50:16,760 --> 00:50:20,200
Speaker 3: Yeah, you're not used to thick about all the people

1027
00:50:21,560 --> 00:50:23,920
Speaker 3: who just had unprotected sets and nothing happening down.

1028
00:50:25,000 --> 00:50:25,920
Speaker 2: I used to be upset.

1029
00:50:26,520 --> 00:50:29,920
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean listen, I was one of those people child.

1030
00:50:31,040 --> 00:50:34,080
Speaker 2: Like, Yeah, I'm like and here I go first time.

1031
00:50:35,000 --> 00:50:39,960
Speaker 1: Yeah, at least it was something that you can cure,

1032
00:50:40,800 --> 00:50:44,200
Speaker 1: you know. But nowadays ship and I'm not promoting this

1033
00:50:44,280 --> 00:50:46,880
Speaker 1: at all, but I feel like nowadays they made it

1034
00:50:46,960 --> 00:50:49,040
Speaker 1: seem like living when their CD is regular.

1035
00:50:51,080 --> 00:50:53,480
Speaker 2: Are you just got this, you just got her, You're

1036
00:50:53,480 --> 00:50:54,080
Speaker 2: gonna be fine?

1037
00:50:54,200 --> 00:50:58,440
Speaker 1: Like yeah, yeah, and I said this on my last episode.

1038
00:50:58,480 --> 00:51:00,239
Speaker 1: They don't even test for herpes, Like you have to

1039
00:51:00,280 --> 00:51:01,200
Speaker 1: ask to get tested.

1040
00:51:02,360 --> 00:51:03,640
Speaker 2: Are you kidding me? Yeah?

1041
00:51:03,680 --> 00:51:08,080
Speaker 1: I mean I ain't know doctor Faulty, but they say

1042
00:51:08,080 --> 00:51:11,120
Speaker 1: that because they now consider herpes as a skin affection.

1043
00:51:12,880 --> 00:51:14,320
Speaker 2: Are you kidding me? Amen?

1044
00:51:14,520 --> 00:51:20,319
Speaker 1: Listen if I'm wrong, y'all, let me know. At You're

1045
00:51:20,320 --> 00:51:21,719
Speaker 1: not gonna even see the results on that because you

1046
00:51:21,760 --> 00:51:22,600
Speaker 1: didn't get tested for it.

1047
00:51:23,280 --> 00:51:26,719
Speaker 3: That's crazy though, But they put everything they put commydia

1048
00:51:27,800 --> 00:51:28,720
Speaker 3: and some other stuff.

1049
00:51:29,040 --> 00:51:32,480
Speaker 2: They don't put that when I go back.

1050
00:51:32,960 --> 00:51:37,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, and last but not least, looking back on your

1051
00:51:37,640 --> 00:51:41,000
Speaker 1: celibacy journey, what are the key lessons or insights you

1052
00:51:41,000 --> 00:51:44,360
Speaker 1: would like to share with our listeners who may be

1053
00:51:44,520 --> 00:51:48,920
Speaker 1: consider considering or exploring celibacy.

1054
00:51:49,520 --> 00:51:57,640
Speaker 3: Mm hmmm, I would say me think that's a nice,

1055
00:51:57,680 --> 00:51:58,560
Speaker 3: beautiful question.

1056
00:51:59,719 --> 00:52:03,360
Speaker 1: I say for me is to just trust yourself, like,

1057
00:52:04,600 --> 00:52:07,800
Speaker 1: don't ignore the vibe, like if you're not fully sure

1058
00:52:08,280 --> 00:52:11,360
Speaker 1: sure Like for me, I really sacrifice a lot and

1059
00:52:11,400 --> 00:52:13,319
Speaker 1: I made a very I made a vow to God.

1060
00:52:13,360 --> 00:52:16,360
Speaker 1: I remember that night. I remember exactly what I was doing,

1061
00:52:16,440 --> 00:52:19,160
Speaker 1: I remember what I had on like that's how serious

1062
00:52:19,200 --> 00:52:21,880
Speaker 1: it was. And it brought me to tears, so like

1063
00:52:22,520 --> 00:52:24,440
Speaker 1: for somebody to come into my life and for me

1064
00:52:24,520 --> 00:52:26,400
Speaker 1: to be serious with them, like it. This gotta be

1065
00:52:26,440 --> 00:52:30,560
Speaker 1: it because I came too far and I sacrificed so

1066
00:52:30,920 --> 00:52:32,680
Speaker 1: much and God put me through it to make sure

1067
00:52:32,680 --> 00:52:34,280
Speaker 1: I was for real.

1068
00:52:35,719 --> 00:52:38,440
Speaker 2: Look at you now right like a diamond.

1069
00:52:39,000 --> 00:52:42,040
Speaker 1: Yes, Yes, being sullivent has been very reward, And I

1070
00:52:42,120 --> 00:52:42,960
Speaker 1: will say that.

1071
00:52:44,520 --> 00:52:46,359
Speaker 2: I would tell them similar to what you're saying.

1072
00:52:46,400 --> 00:52:48,960
Speaker 3: I would like, just tell them do it for yourself,

1073
00:52:50,560 --> 00:52:54,319
Speaker 3: give yourself time and see the difference in your life.

1074
00:52:54,320 --> 00:52:57,319
Speaker 3: Maybe they should even track you know what's different and

1075
00:52:57,400 --> 00:52:58,600
Speaker 3: know why they're doing it.

1076
00:52:59,480 --> 00:53:02,560
Speaker 2: Why, Yeah, don't do it?

1077
00:53:02,560 --> 00:53:04,359
Speaker 3: Like for instance, when I meet a guy, they don't.

1078
00:53:04,440 --> 00:53:07,120
Speaker 3: They shouldn't hold themselves. They shouldn't be waiting for me.

1079
00:53:07,440 --> 00:53:09,000
Speaker 3: I think they should be waiting for God. That's what

1080
00:53:09,040 --> 00:53:12,759
Speaker 3: I'm doing it for. Honestly, I would say, trust this though,

1081
00:53:13,400 --> 00:53:16,279
Speaker 3: and trust the process and just you know, take note

1082
00:53:16,280 --> 00:53:18,000
Speaker 3: of how your life changes over time so you can

1083
00:53:18,080 --> 00:53:19,480
Speaker 3: actually track it and keep data.

1084
00:53:20,040 --> 00:53:22,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, not data on your life, baby, come on now,

1085
00:53:24,520 --> 00:53:27,440
Speaker 1: or what's the data, but like reflect, reflect.

1086
00:53:27,400 --> 00:53:30,560
Speaker 2: Your life prior to and how is it now?

1087
00:53:30,719 --> 00:53:33,680
Speaker 3: Not say everything's gonna be roses, but you know, I

1088
00:53:33,800 --> 00:53:35,560
Speaker 3: dodge some bullets and I'm grateful for it.

1089
00:53:37,360 --> 00:53:39,160
Speaker 2: A whole lot of bullets. I'm really grateful for it.

1090
00:53:39,239 --> 00:53:41,840
Speaker 1: I doged some bullets and machetes, some moms.

1091
00:53:42,840 --> 00:53:45,800
Speaker 2: Right, you still have your moments of trials and tribulations.

1092
00:53:45,880 --> 00:53:48,440
Speaker 1: But I can't you know how many niggas to try

1093
00:53:48,480 --> 00:53:52,440
Speaker 1: to trap me child, My goodness, I'm telling you are

1094
00:53:52,520 --> 00:53:57,880
Speaker 1: a new bitches, child, my God, to pray them niggas away,

1095
00:53:57,960 --> 00:54:02,480
Speaker 1: Like Lord, I know I puts it good, but it

1096
00:54:02,480 --> 00:54:10,240
Speaker 1: ain't good like that niggast. I'm serious, it's just me, girl.

1097
00:54:10,360 --> 00:54:12,799
Speaker 1: I mean it's good. I ain't listen. My boom boom

1098
00:54:12,800 --> 00:54:15,319
Speaker 1: is turned up now, but I don't like that type

1099
00:54:15,320 --> 00:54:21,320
Speaker 1: of energy, like it's given lifetime, Like, oh God, exactly.

1100
00:54:21,320 --> 00:54:25,239
Speaker 2: We don't want people around. Yeah, anybody doesn't deserve you.

1101
00:54:25,320 --> 00:54:28,960
Speaker 3: So trust yourself, trust the process, and just reflect. Right,

1102
00:54:29,920 --> 00:54:31,640
Speaker 3: I was just say, And if you're in a safer space,

1103
00:54:31,760 --> 00:54:33,799
Speaker 3: then it's just like why not. If you're in a

1104
00:54:33,800 --> 00:54:35,160
Speaker 3: more peaceful space, why not?

1105
00:54:35,640 --> 00:54:35,839
Speaker 2: Right.

1106
00:54:36,640 --> 00:54:38,480
Speaker 1: But I'm so happy you came on the show. I

1107
00:54:38,520 --> 00:54:40,440
Speaker 1: know you was a little reluctant at first, but this

1108
00:54:40,600 --> 00:54:42,880
Speaker 1: was an amazing He was nervous.

1109
00:54:44,040 --> 00:54:46,600
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's like you never know where these things are

1110
00:54:46,640 --> 00:54:50,160
Speaker 3: gonna go, but it's fine.

1111
00:54:50,200 --> 00:54:51,880
Speaker 2: You just got to speaking your truth sometimes.

1112
00:54:52,160 --> 00:54:56,120
Speaker 1: Yeah, so nobody else can do it for you. That's

1113
00:54:56,120 --> 00:55:00,160
Speaker 1: what my boss Sharla may be saying. But you know,

1114
00:55:00,200 --> 00:55:02,360
Speaker 1: I think this is amazing, and I really do appreciate

1115
00:55:02,400 --> 00:55:07,440
Speaker 1: you being transparent because you know, I know sharing what

1116
00:55:07,560 --> 00:55:09,799
Speaker 1: led you to being selling it was not easy. But

1117
00:55:09,880 --> 00:55:11,399
Speaker 1: I think that a lot of people need to hear

1118
00:55:11,400 --> 00:55:13,120
Speaker 1: this so they don't feel alone because I know that

1119
00:55:13,160 --> 00:55:14,840
Speaker 1: you're not the only one who experienced that.

1120
00:55:16,480 --> 00:55:20,799
Speaker 2: Damn, that'll be interesting to hear for anybody else out there.

1121
00:55:21,880 --> 00:55:25,239
Speaker 3: Yeah, as a similar story, but thank you for giving

1122
00:55:25,239 --> 00:55:28,080
Speaker 3: me the opportunity as well. I don't know what's gonna

1123
00:55:28,080 --> 00:55:30,319
Speaker 3: happen from here right now, but I do believe I

1124
00:55:30,360 --> 00:55:32,840
Speaker 3: want to keep you in a loop of my journey.

1125
00:55:34,280 --> 00:55:39,400
Speaker 2: So I listened to something today.

1126
00:55:39,719 --> 00:55:42,120
Speaker 3: They were talking about friends and like meeting new friends,

1127
00:55:42,160 --> 00:55:45,360
Speaker 3: and you know, we're so busy now and they're just

1128
00:55:45,360 --> 00:55:46,440
Speaker 3: talking about different types.

1129
00:55:46,280 --> 00:55:47,120
Speaker 2: Of frenzy in life.

1130
00:55:47,480 --> 00:55:49,000
Speaker 3: I don't know if I'm asking to be your friend,

1131
00:55:49,040 --> 00:55:52,040
Speaker 3: but you would be somebody great just to communicate.

1132
00:55:52,880 --> 00:55:55,680
Speaker 1: You know what's so funny? I definitely because I download

1133
00:55:55,680 --> 00:55:58,040
Speaker 1: the Bible app because, like I have a like I'm

1134
00:55:58,280 --> 00:56:01,520
Speaker 1: very spiritual, Like I talked to God all day. I

1135
00:56:01,520 --> 00:56:04,080
Speaker 1: know he'd be like, girl, like there's somebody else a chance,

1136
00:56:04,120 --> 00:56:06,799
Speaker 1: because I'd be like, God, what's going on? But I'm like,

1137
00:56:06,840 --> 00:56:08,440
Speaker 1: I want to get back into like read my Bible

1138
00:56:08,480 --> 00:56:10,319
Speaker 1: and stuff because I used to know scriptures about Herd

1139
00:56:10,360 --> 00:56:12,520
Speaker 1: when I was younger. So I would definitely would like

1140
00:56:12,560 --> 00:56:14,040
Speaker 1: to be a part of y'all Bible study.

1141
00:56:14,920 --> 00:56:18,400
Speaker 2: Okay, why not? I send you the dates. We do

1142
00:56:18,440 --> 00:56:19,120
Speaker 2: it once a week.

1143
00:56:19,560 --> 00:56:21,560
Speaker 3: You got a prayer chat We send our praise in

1144
00:56:21,640 --> 00:56:24,000
Speaker 3: so that we could pray for each other on the

1145
00:56:24,040 --> 00:56:25,120
Speaker 3: call or buy it too.

1146
00:56:25,200 --> 00:56:28,200
Speaker 1: So yeah, yeah, listen. If I come back saying down,

1147
00:56:28,239 --> 00:56:36,440
Speaker 1: shull not fuck with these niggas, blame my guestsis child,

1148
00:56:36,960 --> 00:56:44,480
Speaker 1: So listen to the listeners. Thank you so much for listening.

1149
00:56:44,480 --> 00:56:46,680
Speaker 1: If you have any questions, comments, or concerns, please make

1150
00:56:46,719 --> 00:56:49,080
Speaker 1: sure to email me at Hello at the PHG podcast

1151
00:56:49,160 --> 00:56:53,040
Speaker 1: dot com, follow me on Instagram on Twitter at the

1152
00:56:53,040 --> 00:56:56,120
Speaker 1: PHG podcast, And last, but not least, don't forget to

1153
00:56:56,160 --> 00:56:58,440
Speaker 1: read my love letters. Y'all is really good? Did you

1154
00:56:58,480 --> 00:56:59,440
Speaker 1: read them?

1155
00:56:59,880 --> 00:57:03,319
Speaker 2: I started yesterday, so that's my subscribe.

1156
00:57:03,960 --> 00:57:07,719
Speaker 1: Subscribe listen subscribers up. But it's really good, y'all. It

1157
00:57:07,760 --> 00:57:11,960
Speaker 1: talks about all things love from based on true stories,

1158
00:57:12,200 --> 00:57:14,520
Speaker 1: so please make sure check the check the website out

1159
00:57:14,560 --> 00:57:18,080
Speaker 1: at t h E y a l L t h

1160
00:57:18,120 --> 00:57:25,440
Speaker 1: E one dot com. Until next time, everyone later, have

1161
00:57:25,520 --> 00:57:32,800
Speaker 1: a good one. The Professional Homegirl Podcast is a production

1162
00:57:32,960 --> 00:57:36,920
Speaker 1: of the Black Effect Podcast Network. For more podcasts from iHeartRadio,

1163
00:57:37,280 --> 00:57:40,320
Speaker 1: visit the iHeartRadio app, app a podcasts, or wherever you

1164
00:57:40,360 --> 00:57:43,400
Speaker 1: listen to your favorite shows. Don't forget to subscribe and

1165
00:57:43,600 --> 00:57:45,960
Speaker 1: rate the show, and you can connect with me on

1166
00:57:46,040 --> 00:57:48,240
Speaker 1: social media at the p HG Podcast