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Speaker 1: Oh, welcome back to another episode of Alchemy, this COVID ninetition.

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Speaker 1: I'm your host, Kevin Pollock. Kiss. That's Kevin Well. It

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Speaker 1: turns out some people are familiar with my name. But

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Speaker 1: it's also true, as we've learned from some listeners, my

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Speaker 1: name conjures absolutely nothing. But I digress. Let's meet. I'm

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Speaker 1: not come to show me no particular orders. Say hello

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Speaker 1: to James Heeney. Jimmy tinkled twice on the pipe. If

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Speaker 1: the answer is no, do you remember your first kiss?

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Speaker 1: I do remember my first kiss. Actually no, I don't

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Speaker 1: remember my first kiss, but I am remembering the first

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Speaker 1: one that I recall. Sense, I don't know what just happened.

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Speaker 1: I don't remember my first kiss, but I do remember. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: we're still doing the math on what you said. You're

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Speaker 1: remembering the one, the first one you recall, but it

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Speaker 1: seems you also called there was one previous to it,

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Speaker 1: but you don't remember how it went down. Yeah, that's

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Speaker 1: pretty much the story. That's this one was like, it

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Speaker 1: didn't matter to me very much, but I was reminded

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Speaker 1: about it many times throughout high school, like, oh, you

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Speaker 1: I was the first girl you ever kissed. It was like,

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Speaker 1: I don't. I don't remember us really ever kissing. Honestly,

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Speaker 1: I do remember kissing my first girlfriend, and that was

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Speaker 1: a real kiss. It feels like there were several women

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Speaker 1: who came up to you throughout your life saying, do

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Speaker 1: you remember kissing me? No, that's my takeaway from that story.

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Speaker 1: You know it sounds it sounds u pretty good that

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Speaker 1: it is. Yeah, thank you. Okay, Uh, say hey to

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Speaker 1: Jessica Lowe Jessica not Jesse. What were your nicknames growing up? Um?

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Speaker 1: Little too? Yeah? Little Too was one of my favorite books. Um,

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Speaker 1: got a little tagboat? Um? And also I farted a lot.

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Speaker 1: Maybe I was going to suggest that, uh, and Jesse

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Speaker 1: didn't like Yes, because of Jesse and the rippers on

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Speaker 1: Full House, I thought Jesse was a boy's name. Oh yeah,

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Speaker 1: that's interesting. I had this weird instinct that you did

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Speaker 1: not want to be called Jesse. I don't know what,

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Speaker 1: and now we're finding out. Okay, look at it's Christoperado,

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Speaker 1: Mr C. How are you with getting stung by a bee?

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Speaker 1: No problem, no problem. I have no fear of that,

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Speaker 1: absolutely no fear of that. Do you so have throughout

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Speaker 1: your life? I'm sensing that you've had several bees come

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Speaker 1: up to you and say we we we kissed. Well,

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Speaker 1: that's right, I think, you know, I see people freak

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Speaker 1: out around the bee and I just never had that

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Speaker 1: instinct too. Maybe that makes me dumb, but so I

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Speaker 1: have no fear there. But Jesse, on the other hand,

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Speaker 1: I think, zing, Hey, that's Craig Kaikowski Kakao, please share

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Speaker 1: one memory from performing comedy in Amsterdam, Amsterdam, Amsterdam. I've

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Speaker 1: never performed comedy in Amsterdam. That's not true. Um, I

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Speaker 1: must have been fucking high. I have no memory of it.

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Speaker 1: Oh I saw the Anne Frank House. Yes you did? Yeah?

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Speaker 1: Did you? Did you get laughs? There? It's a tough crowd.

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Speaker 1: It's a really tough crowd. But if you can reach

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Speaker 1: one person, that's what I mean. And last, but hey,

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Speaker 1: you shut your face if you think him least it's

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Speaker 1: Joey Greer scary Larry. Have you ever baked a dessert? No?

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Speaker 1: Why making scary of ship? I watched that baking shows

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Speaker 1: on TV, Like it's it's a fucking science we're talking about.

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Speaker 1: I'm not good at math. No you're not. I usually

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Speaker 1: eyeball everything I can eyeball. No you can't. But you

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Speaker 1: got to be precise when you're cooking. You can add

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Speaker 1: a little flavored like you know, just like literal flavor

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Speaker 1: than your own flavor. And uh, can I give you

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Speaker 1: a little heads up when next time you try to

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Speaker 1: bake banana bread? Yeah, uh, don't whisk too much like

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Speaker 1: your instinct would be because yeah, because then it's the center.

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Speaker 1: Never actually cooks who we cooked. We cook two of

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Speaker 1: them before we realized something was happening. Yeah, well that's

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Speaker 1: that's good. Uh, that's just good comedy advice. Never whisked

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Speaker 1: too hard, Never wish too hard. What was the name

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Speaker 1: of that movie with McCauley cochine that the bees? Weren't

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Speaker 1: it Michael that started that? That gave me a fear

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Speaker 1: of bees? That movie gave you a fear of bees?

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Speaker 1: Die from bees? And he was at but I was like,

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Speaker 1: how about fear of being a child actor? That was

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Speaker 1: always mine? He has what do you mean? He has

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Speaker 1: a really awesome podcast. I'm forgetting the name of it

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Speaker 1: right now, but I've listened to many hours from mcaulay

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Speaker 1: culkins podcast and it's really good. Yeah, Jamie says the

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Speaker 1: same thing Ted Rabbits or something. I forgot what it's

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Speaker 1: got a really weird name, but it's really good. Thanks

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Speaker 1: for that, James, Sorry, don't listen to it. Listen to

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Speaker 1: this episode first. All right, let's do a damn show

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Speaker 1: for the three people who stayed almost all of our scene.

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Speaker 1: Suggestions to gather from your list of emails. If you'd

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Speaker 1: like to submit one, I love reading your emails. Please

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Speaker 1: please please keep writing. You right to your name here

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Speaker 1: at alcumy this dot com. That's your name here alcum

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Speaker 1: I don't set com uh and seen. Number one comes

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Speaker 1: from a Patreon v I P named Xander, who wrote

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Speaker 1: after realizing my last suggestion was art of an opening

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Speaker 1: monologue script for Kevin. Also not a scene that can

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Speaker 1: be done without Vanessa. I'm going to simplify and resuggest

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Speaker 1: in a scene, cast members often opt to making up

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Speaker 1: a name for yet to be introduced character. That name

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Speaker 1: for a female is at least seventy five percent of

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Speaker 1: the time Tina. This happens to be my girlfriend's name.

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Speaker 1: I'm halfway through this. Do we use the name? Tina?

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Speaker 1: Is what he's saying, and he's calculated at minimum of

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Speaker 1: a new character yet to be introduced character ends up

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Speaker 1: being Tina. This happens will be my girlfriend's name. We've

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Speaker 1: been dating for a year now. She's probably heard at

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Speaker 1: least fifty episodes of your podcast. Well, we've done a

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Speaker 1: lot more than fifty. She only listens to the Tina once,

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Speaker 1: so I guess we've done. Well. You do the math

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Speaker 1: on what Joe you can do? All right, get back

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Speaker 1: to us in an hour. All right, she likes the show,

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Speaker 1: I think, God, I hope. So let's just say she's

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Speaker 1: never asked to listen to it, but I have it

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Speaker 1: playing sometimes when she arrives to my place and she

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Speaker 1: hasn't left yet because of it. So I think this

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Speaker 1: tolerance merits a scene based on her somewhat unusual job. Tina,

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Speaker 1: an adoption agent, visits homes of would be parents to

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Speaker 1: determine the suitability of the family and living situation for

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Speaker 1: a potential adopted child's home. Thanks, and this would be

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Speaker 1: the child's office. Um, and this is why would our

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Speaker 1: child need an office? Well, I just want to treat

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Speaker 1: him like an adult. You know, when the baby arrives,

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Speaker 1: you'd like to treat it like an adult. Yeah, I mean,

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Speaker 1: let's just not make a sugarcoated cookie cutter world. Let's

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Speaker 1: get the kid in the office, and I'm so sorry.

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Speaker 1: Would you take a coffee, sir? Yes, yes, honey, I'm

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Speaker 1: not talking to you. Who you are there? Thank you? Coffee,

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Speaker 1: thank you, thank you. Do stop doing this in front

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Speaker 1: of the adoption age. We do, thank you very very much. Now,

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Speaker 1: I brought a colleague with me. We have a very

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Speaker 1: unusual method to test the home. I brought a colleague

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Speaker 1: with me, colleague who has never had colleague and uh

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Speaker 1: will act as the baby colleague. Yeah, could you get

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Speaker 1: me a coffee? Yes, I just this is your coffee.

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Speaker 1: My colleague will act as the baby and wander around

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Speaker 1: your home and we'll test some whether you're baby friendly

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Speaker 1: or not. Oh, that's great. Is your colleague an adult?

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Speaker 1: Are they? There's no such a thing as a baby colleague,

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Speaker 1: is the well, Damien, I don't know that. I don't know.

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Speaker 1: I mean, I got a lot of attitude when I

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Speaker 1: had an office for the baby, and now all of

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Speaker 1: a sudden he's surprised. Why you know, Oh sir, I'm

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Speaker 1: not sure, Mr Sawyer. I don't know if you know this,

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Speaker 1: but we want to treat our child like an adult. So, um,

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Speaker 1: you know we're gonna We've already put out some applications

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Speaker 1: for our baby to work at, you know, different text

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Speaker 1: stores or thank you, thank you Mrs Blanket Chip or

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Speaker 1: can I call you Tina? Uh? Either one's fine. My

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Speaker 1: middle name is Jesse, so whatever. Bring in my colleague

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Speaker 1: and they are going to test your home to see

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Speaker 1: if it's baby safe and we'll see if they gravitate

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Speaker 1: towards the office. Fantastic, Thank you. Hi. Hi, Sorry I'm late. Sorry,

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Speaker 1: I'm late. I was parking my smart car. It's harder. Thanks, yes,

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Speaker 1: I do. Um hi, okay um, let me just let

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Speaker 1: me just sort of toddle around, okay um. Would you

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Speaker 1: like some milk or I don't know what. Yes, I

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Speaker 1: would like a bob. Thank you so much. If you

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Speaker 1: can make me a baba, make me a baba? Okay, Damian,

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Speaker 1: can you help me mix please? Well, one of us

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Speaker 1: should stay here with the baby. I'm just gonna walk

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Speaker 1: around this couch and maybe I'll trip on the side. Oh,

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Speaker 1: oh my god, oh my god. Your your sharpest goddamn

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Speaker 1: table I've ever seen my fucking life. My grandfather gifted

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Speaker 1: it to me. It's knives on the edges of the tables.

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Speaker 1: I'm so sorry. All right, Oh god, do you have

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Speaker 1: now this This is a family heirloom, and I want

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Speaker 1: you to take good care of it. I don't I'm

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Speaker 1: not too much long for this world. But uh, this

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Speaker 1: couch has knives on the edge. Damian, sit down. Yes,

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Speaker 1: I just want to sit on this thing. Damien, sit down.

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Speaker 1: If you're gonna marry my granddaughter, you're gonna sit on

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Speaker 1: my knife couch. Okay, it's this. It's hard to really

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Speaker 1: gently sit down. Okay, it's it's not a comfortable sit No,

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Speaker 1: it's not. It's not my day couches went synonymous with comfort.

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Speaker 1: Oh well that's weird. Okay, wow, I don't know if

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Speaker 1: it's a very nice couch reminds me of Game of Thrones?

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Speaker 1: What is that you're going to trigger him stuff bringing

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Speaker 1: up those fantasy shows. I just worried that if we

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Speaker 1: were to slide down this couch to lagun, I'd cut

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Speaker 1: my the backs of my legs. Well, that's why you

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Speaker 1: gotta be careful, because you could cut the backs of

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Speaker 1: your legs. You could cut your arms up. It's a

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Speaker 1: couch made of knives. Look, well, maybe you can't put

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Speaker 1: any sort of a leather a leather blanket on there,

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Speaker 1: or something like a bear hide or something. Hey, if

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Speaker 1: you've got a leather blanket, then go to town. But

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Speaker 1: I willing, I willing to bet you don't. I don't

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Speaker 1: have one. I'm sure that we can. Yeah, I mean

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Speaker 1: so all the blankets here we have a leather Uh.

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Speaker 1: If you check it, these each one probably weighs anywhere

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Speaker 1: from eighteen to thirty two pounds. Very comfortable. I know

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Speaker 1: the weighted blankets have been going around recently and people

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Speaker 1: are pretty excited about that. But why why do you

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Speaker 1: want cold metal when you can have the flesh of

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Speaker 1: a dead animal wrapping you up. That's what I was thinking. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: that's great, but you look like a betan man, and

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Speaker 1: I bet that you want to be. Yeah, betting man. Okay, honey,

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Speaker 1: can wely on the on the leather blanket? Can we

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Speaker 1: lie on that place? Go for it? Yeah? Take it

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Speaker 1: for a spin. Mm hmm, oh it's it's considerably softer

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Speaker 1: than I thought I would. Bah. Yeah, and and there's

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Speaker 1: more padding. What's the padding made of? Is that? But

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Speaker 1: this isn't real leather? Yeah? Each each sixteen cows. We're

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Speaker 1: on our way to being vegans. We're about a block away,

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Speaker 1: and I don't think this is gonna work at all.

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Speaker 1: You came to the right place. This is the weighted

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Speaker 1: blanket store, the original way to blanket. Now, as you

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Speaker 1: can tell, these are made of all metal um um.

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Speaker 1: So we're looking minimum minimum weight fifty pounds, goes all

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Speaker 1: the way up to half a ton depending on your needs. Sides,

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Speaker 1: Can we lie down? Can't we lie down in this? Sure? Sure?

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Speaker 1: So you make these right here in the back. I

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Speaker 1: take it based on this. Yeah, yeah, that's the that's

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Speaker 1: the shop. A lot of welding, soldering, little planks in

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Speaker 1: the air. Yeah. Now, you don't want those to get

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Speaker 1: into your skin, you know, that's that causes a problem. Okay,

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Speaker 1: so you you went shopping for a leather blanket with

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Speaker 1: another woman, entirely mother. It's my mother. She goes with

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Speaker 1: me shopping. And that wasn't clear from the anecdote. Somehow

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Speaker 1: did you who do you think it would tell a

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Speaker 1: story about going to the blanket store with Look? Okay,

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Speaker 1: but now you're now you're gonna put this leather blanket

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Speaker 1: all over my beautiful knife couch. Just mean you told

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Speaker 1: me that if I had one, that that's a good idea.

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Speaker 1: He think you could go to town, Damian. He didn't

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Speaker 1: even throw it over the goddamn house. I don't speak

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Speaker 1: metaphorically when I said go to town, I mean go

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Speaker 1: to town and show them your leather blanket. It's just

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Speaker 1: that my mother agreed, if we're trying to have kids,

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Speaker 1: that we should have something covering the knife couch. It

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Speaker 1: seemed it seemed fair, and we we were gonna go

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Speaker 1: for a magnetic you know, we want to hear the

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Speaker 1: story I have with my lungs now. I want to well,

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Speaker 1: I have shaping some metal from the from the shop

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Speaker 1: of the back, and it's I can't go through any

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Speaker 1: sort of metal detectors without ring you off. Now, look,

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Speaker 1: the whole reason you gotta baby proof this area is

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Speaker 1: to show off for the adoption people because your boys

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Speaker 1: can't swim and you can't make a baby on your own. Whoa,

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Speaker 1: I just speak honestly, that's who I am. We don't

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Speaker 1: We never found out which one of us can't, Okay,

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Speaker 1: so you got to find out. It's crucial to the relationship.

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Speaker 1: I just feel like it's okay, thanks for coming in today,

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Speaker 1: and they have some good news for one of you, uh,

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Speaker 1: and some not so great news. I guess for the other.

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Speaker 1: But that's a weird way to put the Well, honestly,

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Speaker 1: any news that's good. It is good for both of

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Speaker 1: us because we're a team and a unit. I'm glad

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Speaker 1: you feel so positively right now because, as it turns out, yes, yes,

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Speaker 1: you have the wrong the wrong paperwork. Oh no, yeah,

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Speaker 1: it's just the correct paperwork you have there, Now you

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Speaker 1: have the correct How does this happen? Okay, sorry, I

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Speaker 1: had the wrong paperwork. Well, it's it's administrative. It's I'm

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Speaker 1: a physician. I can't handle he doesn't. He doesn't handle

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Speaker 1: the paperwork. He's a doctor. We don't need to point

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Speaker 1: fingers either. It's my fault, Gary, it's my fault, Nurse Tina. Honestly,

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Speaker 1: this is gonna be fine. So thank you was wrong?

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Speaker 1: Was it? Was it mine or was it my wife? So,

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Speaker 1: so the paperwork I had was incorrect. This is the

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Speaker 1: correct paperwork, and according to this you don't have sperm. Sweetheart. Um,

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Speaker 1: it turns out this paperwork also says you're shooting blank sir.

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Speaker 1: Oh shit, So the problem is the same. It's just

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Speaker 1: the correct paperwork. Oh shit, do you know what I

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Speaker 1: mean by the way, when I say shooting, it means

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Speaker 1: that there's it's just it's just the liquid e stuff

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Speaker 1: and none of the little guys. It means you're able

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Speaker 1: to excrete semen, but it's not going to kill anyone.

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Speaker 1: Oh well, I don't want killing now. Now. When I

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Speaker 1: said shooting blanks, I meant that you have a starter pistol,

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Speaker 1: because again I don't speak metaphorically. I was not referring

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Speaker 1: to your sexual ability whatsoever. His penis is not a

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Speaker 1: starter pistol. It's not literally a starter pistil. It's just

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Speaker 1: it's a full fledged office pistol. Oh, I think I'm

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Speaker 1: dying to play on the couch. Say goodbye to grand Patina.

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Speaker 1: Lie down on the couch. Got impaled on my own couch.

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Speaker 1: We're all gathered here today to remember Tina. Tina. Speak up,

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Speaker 1: man with a legacy far beyond his works, speaking beyond

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Speaker 1: his say again, speak up, far beyond his works, and

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Speaker 1: is the actions within our community. I've been so much pages.

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Speaker 1: Get me off of it. I won't be soon, but

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Speaker 1: this is awful. You gotta be dead now, do you

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Speaker 1: hear me? All right? Oh? Hush up now? As per

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Speaker 1: tradition in our small town. Each of us, shut the

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Speaker 1: funk up. Shut each of us, will um, you know,

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Speaker 1: do the traditional thing that we do here, which we'll

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Speaker 1: all take a block of cheese and rub it over

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Speaker 1: the face of the deceased. Get rid of this couch.

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Speaker 1: It's awful. Forgive me, father, for I have sin. It's

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Speaker 1: been three weeks since my last confession. I remember, listen, Uh.

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Speaker 1: I went to my grandfather's funeral, and I have questions

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Speaker 1: about life and death. And I don't believe if I'm

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Speaker 1: not convinced he was dead, and I don't even know

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Speaker 1: if he was ever alive. Mm hm. And also the

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Speaker 1: the guy who was running the ceremony, I guess he

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Speaker 1: was a priest of some kind. He could have just

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Speaker 1: worked at the funeral home. I think he was on

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Speaker 1: some sort of drugs or alcohol. He kept telling my

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Speaker 1: grandfather shut up. M And I'm questioning what my purpose

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Speaker 1: is and whether I should kill myself or people in

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Speaker 1: the village. M m m m. Well, why don't you

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Speaker 1: come over to my side of the booth, sorry, come

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Speaker 1: over to my side of the booth. You mean come

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Speaker 1: to Jesus, No, I mean you leave where you are.

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Speaker 1: I can't see you through the screen. Come on, come

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Speaker 1: on over to the side. We're going to do this

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Speaker 1: face to face. That's right, father. I think I might

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Speaker 1: be more comfortable if we both step out. I don't know. Okay, okay.

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Speaker 1: On the count three, what do you say? Yeah? Good? Okay? One? Okay.

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Speaker 1: Do we step out on three or do we step

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Speaker 1: out on what would be four? I'm already outside. Fuck, okay,

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Speaker 1: I'll go back. I'll go in. I'll go in and

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Speaker 1: meet you back in. Okay, okay, hello, okay, one, two, three,

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Speaker 1: and then we step out. Okay, okay, father, okay, okay,

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Speaker 1: look at you? Look at you? Not know you were

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Speaker 1: this tall? Yeah, I'm a tall guy. Tall guy. You

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Speaker 1: know I played college basketball. You did for un Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Life is like about couch made of knives. I didn't

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Speaker 1: see this come so. At times you're comfortable laying there right,

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Speaker 1: and most of the times you diad mm hmmm. Okay,

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Speaker 1: So what would you say my purposes going forward? Let's

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Speaker 1: see your purpose? Your purpose here? Cave your hand, cave

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Speaker 1: your hand. You can also read my palm. What does

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Speaker 1: this line mean? I've always been confused by this line.

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Speaker 1: Um poop the amount of poop you will? Um? So

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Speaker 1: I have healthy poop, healthy poops. Yeah, yeah, well it

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Speaker 1: looks like you don't have much of a purpose. Can

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Speaker 1: I ask a little quick questions? Your reason you're not

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Speaker 1: dressed like a priest, it's because I'm not a priest. Man,

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Speaker 1: I knew it. You've been. Come on out, everybody, Come

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Speaker 1: on out, Charlotte. We got you. I mean the worst.

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Speaker 1: I'm selling Pa here on the couch. That part was real,

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Speaker 1: and that's see number one. That part was real. Seed

328
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Speaker 1: too comes to us today from an unnamed source who wrote,

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Speaker 1: if this is used, I would prefer to remain anonymous. Thanks,

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Speaker 1: as I'm working every day in the hospital through this pandemic,

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Speaker 1: the need for comp comedic relief is the highest it's

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Speaker 1: ever been. Thank you all for the awesome content you

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Speaker 1: have created. This uh, this far must be, thus far,

334
00:22:31,760 --> 00:22:38,240
Speaker 1: this far suggestion and this is um they're going to

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Speaker 1: remain anonymous. I'm gonna say that the suggestion is sort

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Speaker 1: of something we've had a lot of. But it's the

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Speaker 1: first email I've received from someone who's working in a

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Speaker 1: hospital during the pandemic, and I wanted to use there's suggestions,

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Speaker 1: So please bear down and let's see if we can't

340
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Speaker 1: put a new spin on a quote unquote tired, if

341
00:23:00,040 --> 00:23:08,600
Speaker 1: not hackneyed suggestion. The script from aliens invade the Plan and,

342
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Speaker 1: in their first contact ever with humans, is in the

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Speaker 1: middle of a major pandemic in one of the hardest

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Speaker 1: hit areas. I love you all because you each bring

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Speaker 1: something special to the show, Anonymous. All right, we gotta

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Speaker 1: make sure that this wing is cleared off. Okay, We've

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Speaker 1: got a lot of patients coming in here, and I

348
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Speaker 1: gotta make sure this is quarantine for them. All right,

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Speaker 1: Let's make sure that anyone coming into the e R

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Speaker 1: looking for any kind of you who speaks question. Yeah,

351
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Speaker 1: can we get this gentleman out of here? Please? Okay, sir,

352
00:23:39,240 --> 00:23:40,760
Speaker 1: if you need to talk to somebody, please go down

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Speaker 1: to the front office and will direct you exactly where

354
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Speaker 1: you need to go. Okay, I think address him by

355
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Speaker 1: his actual name, Plead dark Skin dunk a Dunk, come ship, Jim.

356
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Speaker 1: I think these are the doctors from from the the

357
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Speaker 1: the other county coming to observe sir. Sorry, we are

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Speaker 1: from Connecticut, Yes, from Connecticut. Yeah, uh, please come this

359
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Speaker 1: right this way. My God that we we've been Uh,

360
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Speaker 1: it's so anxious for you both to come through. So

361
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Speaker 1: if you're looking at the data here, Um, do you

362
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Speaker 1: have an iPad at dollars or do you call that data? Uh? Well,

363
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Speaker 1: I mean it's what we have right now. But um, okay,

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Speaker 1: oh that's a different device. I've never Are we being punked? No, no, no,

365
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Speaker 1: you're not being punked. These numbers are accurate. Um, do

366
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Speaker 1: you actually work here? I do. I do work here.

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Speaker 1: But you know, most of the time I do think

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Speaker 1: to myself, should I work here? Do I deserve to

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Speaker 1: work here? Am I? The best thing would be I

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Speaker 1: don't know, And I've reconciled with that, and I think,

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Speaker 1: in a word, no, yeah, I guess what else do

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Speaker 1: you think you could do? Doctor? Doctors? Doctors? We have

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Speaker 1: an emergency case. We have a code read emergency case

374
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Speaker 1: right now. We need the best doctors in the room.

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Speaker 1: Get in there, now, bring us to this patient. We

376
00:25:00,440 --> 00:25:02,359
Speaker 1: got a Mountaine code red. Let's go. Let's go and

377
00:25:02,520 --> 00:25:06,840
Speaker 1: do Code red. Doctors, come in please, we need your

378
00:25:06,840 --> 00:25:12,560
Speaker 1: expertise here. He is Tina, Tina, give your diagnosis. He

379
00:25:13,359 --> 00:25:17,600
Speaker 1: is an atrial fibrillation. We need to do compressions at

380
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Speaker 1: seven by eighty per second. Holy sh it, technical st

381
00:25:23,000 --> 00:25:30,320
Speaker 1: out of her back a little. It's working. It's working

382
00:25:31,200 --> 00:25:37,440
Speaker 1: a little, a little wit. You're not from Connecticut? Are

383
00:25:37,480 --> 00:25:44,760
Speaker 1: you happy now? Freaks? Why are we freaks? Have you

384
00:25:44,800 --> 00:25:49,800
Speaker 1: passed the reflecting device? Sir? Sir? How do you feel? I?

385
00:25:50,080 --> 00:25:54,720
Speaker 1: Uh well, I tell them, honestly, you've never felt better.

386
00:25:55,160 --> 00:25:58,639
Speaker 1: I honestly, I've never felt better. Honestly, I feel like

387
00:25:58,680 --> 00:26:01,960
Speaker 1: a kid again. I feel right. Let me off this bed.

388
00:26:02,000 --> 00:26:04,760
Speaker 1: I want to run. I want to run. Okay, so

389
00:26:05,000 --> 00:26:08,320
Speaker 1: we need to keep you under observation for I feel great.

390
00:26:08,320 --> 00:26:10,480
Speaker 1: I want to What if this feeling goes away? I

391
00:26:10,560 --> 00:26:12,520
Speaker 1: need to get up. I need to He's ripping his

392
00:26:12,600 --> 00:26:20,199
Speaker 1: ivy out. Do you feel better now? Freaks us? He

393
00:26:20,280 --> 00:26:27,760
Speaker 1: chumped out the window. Well, he's fine, he's running. He's running. Doctor, doctor, doctor?

394
00:26:28,400 --> 00:26:30,920
Speaker 1: Do you should you even be working here? I mean,

395
00:26:31,000 --> 00:26:34,640
Speaker 1: you've worked on all these patients and nothing's been getting better.

396
00:26:34,680 --> 00:26:37,480
Speaker 1: And then these two walk in from Connecticut and people

397
00:26:37,480 --> 00:26:41,800
Speaker 1: are jumping out of window. They're not Connecticut. Obviously, tentacles

398
00:26:41,800 --> 00:26:44,200
Speaker 1: popped out of our back and that thing isn't attached

399
00:26:44,240 --> 00:26:47,960
Speaker 1: to the side. Okay, well I wish you had that. Yeah,

400
00:26:48,760 --> 00:26:53,400
Speaker 1: this human offers up great insight. Have you considered plumbing.

401
00:26:54,640 --> 00:26:57,240
Speaker 1: Let me get two more. I just don't get it, man,

402
00:26:57,760 --> 00:27:01,280
Speaker 1: You know I thought that we had any thing. Yeah,

403
00:27:01,480 --> 00:27:04,800
Speaker 1: I mean, we didn't save everybody, but we save some people.

404
00:27:05,200 --> 00:27:10,600
Speaker 1: Some people sometime the best we can with the medicine

405
00:27:10,600 --> 00:27:14,440
Speaker 1: that we have available to us. Exactly exactly we could

406
00:27:14,520 --> 00:27:18,960
Speaker 1: use more ppe certainly, Oh my god, of course, gentlemen.

407
00:27:19,600 --> 00:27:23,560
Speaker 1: These two drinks, uh were bought buying that person at

408
00:27:23,560 --> 00:27:27,159
Speaker 1: the end of the bar. Uh kind of dark? You

409
00:27:27,200 --> 00:27:31,440
Speaker 1: really see who's over there? It's it's my name is

410
00:27:31,480 --> 00:27:37,600
Speaker 1: Agent Johnson. Might I have a word with you two physicians? Sure? Yeah,

411
00:27:37,640 --> 00:27:42,119
Speaker 1: I understand you worked at BC Medical. Uh? Yeah, is

412
00:27:42,200 --> 00:27:44,679
Speaker 1: there is there if you're buying? Excuse me? Can I

413
00:27:44,720 --> 00:27:49,600
Speaker 1: get a Can I get a double martini? Please? Yeah?

414
00:27:49,680 --> 00:27:53,440
Speaker 1: This is a Miller light. This is terrible. A double martini.

415
00:27:56,200 --> 00:28:02,120
Speaker 1: I'll take a triple martini. I'll triple bring six martinage please. Yeah,

416
00:28:02,160 --> 00:28:06,399
Speaker 1: I'm gonna bring it through. Also, there's a raspy voice,

417
00:28:07,480 --> 00:28:09,520
Speaker 1: sexy woman over there, who said, hi, do you guys

418
00:28:09,600 --> 00:28:14,040
Speaker 1: before you left? But hey, please let us focus, let

419
00:28:14,080 --> 00:28:18,520
Speaker 1: us focus. Let's just make the drinks. Were doctors we

420
00:28:18,600 --> 00:28:21,119
Speaker 1: get hit on all the time. It's part of the

421
00:28:21,280 --> 00:28:28,040
Speaker 1: biz man. So tell me about these new doctors from

422
00:28:28,119 --> 00:28:33,199
Speaker 1: quote unquote Connecticut. Well, they maybe they had a strange

423
00:28:33,200 --> 00:28:37,800
Speaker 1: way of speaking. By strange, by strange, I mean how strange?

424
00:28:38,480 --> 00:28:43,480
Speaker 1: Different language? No, no vermouth in mind? Please? Is it

425
00:28:43,560 --> 00:28:48,920
Speaker 1: a different language? Tons of tons of make three of

426
00:28:48,960 --> 00:28:56,000
Speaker 1: them super dry and the others not. Okay, I mean

427
00:28:56,120 --> 00:28:58,239
Speaker 1: they were, to be honest with you, using like the

428
00:28:58,320 --> 00:29:04,200
Speaker 1: classic alien voice, right, that was like right out of

429
00:29:04,400 --> 00:29:07,520
Speaker 1: alien voice one of one handbook. Yeah, something out of

430
00:29:07,520 --> 00:29:09,880
Speaker 1: like a sixties like alien movie. You know what, kind

431
00:29:09,880 --> 00:29:13,480
Speaker 1: of stilted and nasal. And this is why I'm I'm

432
00:29:13,520 --> 00:29:16,120
Speaker 1: asking me. We have reasons to believe they were not,

433
00:29:16,200 --> 00:29:18,920
Speaker 1: in fact aliens. Hold on a second, or what are

434
00:29:18,920 --> 00:29:20,800
Speaker 1: you trying to say? Did you have blue cheese olives?

435
00:29:21,960 --> 00:29:29,600
Speaker 1: What glue cheese olives? No gin either? Just for moving? Yeah?

436
00:29:29,680 --> 00:29:34,800
Speaker 1: Did you what do you use in vodka? Jim Vodka wanted?

437
00:29:35,360 --> 00:29:39,840
Speaker 1: No vodka, no gin, just for mouthing mind, Agent Johnson?

438
00:29:39,840 --> 00:29:43,240
Speaker 1: What did you get from him? I got six drink

439
00:29:43,360 --> 00:29:48,200
Speaker 1: orders that I still confused by. And they did say

440
00:29:48,240 --> 00:29:54,080
Speaker 1: that that those aliens quote unquote aliens. I know we

441
00:29:54,200 --> 00:30:00,360
Speaker 1: both know that they spoke like typical outer space aliens

442
00:30:00,400 --> 00:30:05,360
Speaker 1: like from the sixties. Stereotypical is what I mean? Can

443
00:30:05,440 --> 00:30:10,880
Speaker 1: I tell you boys a drink? Oh? We really shouldn't

444
00:30:10,920 --> 00:30:13,760
Speaker 1: be drinking. We're on the clock. Come on, a couple

445
00:30:13,760 --> 00:30:16,959
Speaker 1: of handsome agents like you? Do you know we were

446
00:30:17,080 --> 00:30:22,400
Speaker 1: agents already here? Oh well, Tina, if it isn't you,

447
00:30:23,640 --> 00:30:29,960
Speaker 1: I've got them already, Roberta, Lady, this is my post, okay,

448
00:30:30,040 --> 00:30:33,960
Speaker 1: And I'm gonna buy these boys a goddamn drink. Shouldn't drink.

449
00:30:36,000 --> 00:30:39,920
Speaker 1: I'm happy to have some bourbon neat well, I'm not

450
00:30:39,920 --> 00:30:42,760
Speaker 1: gonna let him drink alone. I'll have a bourbon, a

451
00:30:42,840 --> 00:30:46,720
Speaker 1: dirty bourbon, Roberta. Why don't buy these boys a drink

452
00:30:46,760 --> 00:30:50,000
Speaker 1: and you can get them some nuts or something. Oh

453
00:30:50,080 --> 00:30:52,680
Speaker 1: that sounds good. Oh that's just what you would say, Tina,

454
00:30:52,960 --> 00:30:58,640
Speaker 1: Finet some nuts, anything with salt on it. Baby? Is

455
00:30:58,960 --> 00:31:03,200
Speaker 1: so you want one one dirty bourbon? Is that is

456
00:31:03,200 --> 00:31:06,640
Speaker 1: that what you said? You want a dirty, dirty, yeah,

457
00:31:06,760 --> 00:31:11,200
Speaker 1: dirty bourbon bourbon. I want a dirty bourbon and the

458
00:31:11,240 --> 00:31:15,719
Speaker 1: saltiest nuts you have. Uh yeah, we only got one

459
00:31:15,800 --> 00:31:19,840
Speaker 1: kind of nut, but uh do so you want all

460
00:31:19,880 --> 00:31:24,200
Speaker 1: of juice in your bourbon? That sounds filthy? I don't

461
00:31:24,200 --> 00:31:26,640
Speaker 1: want a filthy bourbon. I want just a dirty bourbon.

462
00:31:28,720 --> 00:31:34,400
Speaker 1: You know what's the one kind of nut? Ladies and gentlemen,

463
00:31:34,480 --> 00:31:37,800
Speaker 1: we have some great news here at the hospital. Um,

464
00:31:37,920 --> 00:31:42,720
Speaker 1: thanks to our colleagues from Connecticut, we have for the

465
00:31:42,800 --> 00:31:47,720
Speaker 1: first time no patience. They've all been healed. Everyone's better

466
00:31:49,760 --> 00:31:51,440
Speaker 1: now and hate. I hate to do this, but I

467
00:31:51,480 --> 00:31:54,880
Speaker 1: have to fire a couple of you. Not whoa wait,

468
00:31:55,040 --> 00:31:58,760
Speaker 1: whoa buddy, If you spoke out, you're probably the one

469
00:31:58,760 --> 00:32:07,080
Speaker 1: who's fired. I have no patience for this. Can you too?

470
00:32:07,320 --> 00:32:11,600
Speaker 1: You're gone? Oh god, thank god we were. We were

471
00:32:11,640 --> 00:32:18,080
Speaker 1: the chief of surgery and the chief of neuro surgery. Okay, alright,

472
00:32:18,240 --> 00:32:27,120
Speaker 1: vinitor man, alright, wait what all right? We do have

473
00:32:27,800 --> 00:32:33,040
Speaker 1: one last patient and want to tell anybody about it. Now.

474
00:32:33,960 --> 00:32:36,800
Speaker 1: We're gonna send one Connecticut doctor in there and one

475
00:32:36,840 --> 00:32:40,200
Speaker 1: of ours, and whoever saves this patient. Is this a

476
00:32:40,320 --> 00:32:43,479
Speaker 1: reality competition? You know what is this? This is malpractice? Man?

477
00:32:43,560 --> 00:32:46,320
Speaker 1: You can only that, but the patient will be lying

478
00:32:47,240 --> 00:32:50,600
Speaker 1: on a bed of knives. Doom doom, doom, doom doom.

479
00:32:50,640 --> 00:32:57,640
Speaker 1: Do happen to you? Hear this music? I'm doom? Where

480
00:32:57,680 --> 00:33:01,080
Speaker 1: do we go? No one told what is going on?

481
00:33:01,360 --> 00:33:05,560
Speaker 1: All right? You two get out of Are you serious?

482
00:33:06,080 --> 00:33:10,800
Speaker 1: But I don't know. It just came out, and I've

483
00:33:10,800 --> 00:33:12,680
Speaker 1: been like racking my brain about what that alien from

484
00:33:12,680 --> 00:33:14,720
Speaker 1: Connecticut told me about, I mean, not being a doctor

485
00:33:14,800 --> 00:33:16,520
Speaker 1: and all that ship. And I was like, I'm just

486
00:33:16,560 --> 00:33:19,640
Speaker 1: gonna restart my life and I'm just gonna start at

487
00:33:19,680 --> 00:33:23,600
Speaker 1: the bottom speaking of the quote unquote alien from quote

488
00:33:23,680 --> 00:33:28,640
Speaker 1: unquote Connecticut. We have the lead doctor here. I would

489
00:33:28,640 --> 00:33:32,880
Speaker 1: like to say a few words. I do believe that

490
00:33:33,040 --> 00:33:38,840
Speaker 1: this hospital is about to be broadcast live across the

491
00:33:38,960 --> 00:33:43,400
Speaker 1: nation as a reality television show. My deep research and

492
00:33:43,520 --> 00:33:48,000
Speaker 1: understanding is that the ratings should be fairly solid, as

493
00:33:48,080 --> 00:33:50,520
Speaker 1: most folks are home with nothing to do or watch,

494
00:33:52,200 --> 00:33:54,160
Speaker 1: and I would like every one of their best behavior

495
00:33:54,320 --> 00:33:57,240
Speaker 1: to represent this hospital and the best possible. What light

496
00:33:57,960 --> 00:34:04,000
Speaker 1: and mentioned perhaps two percent less of our origin location

497
00:34:04,120 --> 00:34:09,120
Speaker 1: of Connecticut questions, Hey, do you might turn it that

498
00:34:09,440 --> 00:34:12,279
Speaker 1: uh that TV down for a second here? And look, uh,

499
00:34:12,560 --> 00:34:15,080
Speaker 1: your bar is one of the hottest bars in the city,

500
00:34:15,239 --> 00:34:17,160
Speaker 1: right okay, and it looks like you only got one

501
00:34:17,239 --> 00:34:19,960
Speaker 1: kind of nut. All right. Now, what I want to

502
00:34:20,040 --> 00:34:22,080
Speaker 1: do is I want to make sure that when people

503
00:34:22,120 --> 00:34:32,080
Speaker 1: come in here, they could get get out of here. God, look, look,

504
00:34:32,080 --> 00:34:34,600
Speaker 1: I gotta give you one. I'll give you one free

505
00:34:34,880 --> 00:34:37,440
Speaker 1: well shot, and then you gotta leave. Oh look, I

506
00:34:37,520 --> 00:34:39,279
Speaker 1: might look, I'll take you. I'll take it. But look,

507
00:34:41,600 --> 00:34:45,719
Speaker 1: I gotta blok bag out here. Jesus open, and I

508
00:34:45,800 --> 00:34:49,040
Speaker 1: got all these kind of message here right now. Some

509
00:34:49,200 --> 00:34:51,839
Speaker 1: of these nuts are from Brazil. Some of these nuts

510
00:34:51,880 --> 00:34:55,000
Speaker 1: are from Brazil. Take a handful, all right, and just

511
00:34:55,239 --> 00:34:57,640
Speaker 1: pop up and see what it is. You like that

512
00:34:58,200 --> 00:35:02,080
Speaker 1: they're all wet, They're all hot and wet. It was

513
00:35:02,520 --> 00:35:08,080
Speaker 1: love try and it was hot. Forgive me for he's

514
00:35:08,200 --> 00:35:11,200
Speaker 1: dropping their fellow. But I thought I heard that you

515
00:35:11,360 --> 00:35:18,040
Speaker 1: had some wet, hot Brazilian nuts. Stranger, stranger to this place,

516
00:35:18,200 --> 00:35:21,640
Speaker 1: But you're certainly handsome. What are you? What are you

517
00:35:21,760 --> 00:35:24,879
Speaker 1: charging for those wet ha bazilion nuts? Well, right now,

518
00:35:25,120 --> 00:35:28,000
Speaker 1: if this boat was to just get on board with it,

519
00:35:28,040 --> 00:35:29,840
Speaker 1: I mean, I mean, it is something him, but what

520
00:35:30,000 --> 00:35:34,239
Speaker 1: I would charge for wholesale, wholesale wholesale, Yeah, for for

521
00:35:34,360 --> 00:35:38,040
Speaker 1: twenty PAGs of these DUTs, I'll have what he's having.

522
00:35:39,840 --> 00:35:46,000
Speaker 1: Come on, you're listen, I can I can tell a

523
00:35:46,080 --> 00:35:48,160
Speaker 1: fellow salesman when I see one. How long you've been

524
00:35:48,200 --> 00:35:54,879
Speaker 1: on the road, kid? Yeah, any luck in the quad

525
00:35:54,960 --> 00:36:01,359
Speaker 1: cities because cities nothing. Everyone's going, let's the finger food

526
00:36:01,400 --> 00:36:03,600
Speaker 1: and going more of the straw stuff if you want

527
00:36:03,600 --> 00:36:07,000
Speaker 1: to me. So I'm lucking Bettendorff and Davenport, but not

528
00:36:07,160 --> 00:36:10,080
Speaker 1: so much in Rocket And yeah, I haven't been to

529
00:36:10,440 --> 00:36:14,280
Speaker 1: use that's time I was there over at the Golden

530
00:36:14,320 --> 00:36:17,600
Speaker 1: Eyeball they had was or what the hell was up

531
00:36:17,840 --> 00:36:24,919
Speaker 1: on his day strollers? Let's okay, listen at this point

532
00:36:24,960 --> 00:36:28,080
Speaker 1: in the process, there's no bad suggestions. All right, We're

533
00:36:28,120 --> 00:36:31,560
Speaker 1: taking all comers. So if you have a name, uh,

534
00:36:32,080 --> 00:36:36,279
Speaker 1: please share it. We're looking to replace the current name

535
00:36:36,320 --> 00:36:38,879
Speaker 1: of the bar, the Golden Eyeball. So as you can see,

536
00:36:39,000 --> 00:36:42,160
Speaker 1: our standards are pretty pretty low. Just throw out and

537
00:36:42,239 --> 00:36:43,960
Speaker 1: he said, yep, me and back what you got? T

538
00:36:44,080 --> 00:36:47,919
Speaker 1: G T G. I Friday's okay, that's hilarious. Anybody else

539
00:36:48,600 --> 00:36:50,960
Speaker 1: a little more, a little more helpful? Yeah, yeah, Tommy

540
00:36:51,680 --> 00:36:57,960
Speaker 1: Ross dressed for less. You know, I don't understand. I mean, say,

541
00:36:58,040 --> 00:37:02,200
Speaker 1: whoever names the bar? Can I have a drink? Tina

542
00:37:02,239 --> 00:37:04,120
Speaker 1: wants to buy somebody a drink. All we need is

543
00:37:04,200 --> 00:37:07,960
Speaker 1: a name that doesn't exist. Yet I should have qualified that.

544
00:37:08,160 --> 00:37:12,239
Speaker 1: That's my mistake, looking for a name of the establishment

545
00:37:12,360 --> 00:37:18,920
Speaker 1: that doesn't yet exist. Brand new name, Larry, Oh, okay,

546
00:37:19,800 --> 00:37:23,680
Speaker 1: we got we got one on the board. How do

547
00:37:23,800 --> 00:37:26,759
Speaker 1: I fell? Jesus Christ, Steve? What do you want for me?

548
00:37:27,520 --> 00:37:30,359
Speaker 1: The same high school? We were the point to put

549
00:37:30,400 --> 00:37:31,680
Speaker 1: it on the board. But I don't know how to

550
00:37:31,719 --> 00:37:34,200
Speaker 1: spell that. Could you say it for me one more Tommy?

551
00:37:34,280 --> 00:37:37,080
Speaker 1: Can you say it one more time? T G Fridays.

552
00:37:39,680 --> 00:37:42,120
Speaker 1: You know when I was a little kid, my little

553
00:37:42,160 --> 00:37:45,120
Speaker 1: brother couldn't say my name, so we said cheet, what

554
00:37:45,239 --> 00:37:53,120
Speaker 1: if we call it chet Barho? Spell that? Please? Larry,

555
00:37:54,239 --> 00:38:01,040
Speaker 1: I know how to spell titty. Didn't write it down.

556
00:38:01,800 --> 00:38:05,239
Speaker 1: I write as fast as I care on. Okay, I

557
00:38:05,320 --> 00:38:10,279
Speaker 1: got two names up here, yep, uh, Roger and Neben. Yes,

558
00:38:10,760 --> 00:38:15,840
Speaker 1: are you the proprietor of Titty Bar. I'm sorry, but

559
00:38:15,960 --> 00:38:20,920
Speaker 1: the city council has voted to not permit your business

560
00:38:21,000 --> 00:38:23,799
Speaker 1: to reopen, uh, and are going to be revoking your

561
00:38:24,320 --> 00:38:30,600
Speaker 1: liquor license. You're sorry, Yes, it's I guess it's the

562
00:38:30,640 --> 00:38:32,400
Speaker 1: best way to put it. Is this censorship? Is that

563
00:38:32,480 --> 00:38:36,600
Speaker 1: what the boards attempting? Censorship? No? No, sir, no, it's

564
00:38:36,640 --> 00:38:40,320
Speaker 1: not that. Do you know Mayor Wilson perfectly? You know,

565
00:38:40,440 --> 00:38:42,520
Speaker 1: casually I see him in like, yeah, I didn't think so,

566
00:38:42,719 --> 00:38:44,920
Speaker 1: I didn't think so. He's my he's my third cousin.

567
00:38:46,160 --> 00:38:48,120
Speaker 1: Should I get Mayor Wilson on the phone and see

568
00:38:48,120 --> 00:38:51,560
Speaker 1: if titty bar flies? Well? Sure, I mean if you

569
00:38:51,600 --> 00:38:53,200
Speaker 1: want to do that. The city council has voted. It's

570
00:38:53,200 --> 00:38:55,480
Speaker 1: a visa Tohnny get me through to the mayor my cousin.

571
00:38:56,200 --> 00:38:59,799
Speaker 1: All right, can you hold just for a second, please,

572
00:38:59,800 --> 00:39:03,560
Speaker 1: we like get the Mayor on the phone. Sure, I'll wait. Uh,

573
00:39:03,760 --> 00:39:08,880
Speaker 1: it's he's on the phone. Hello, this is Mayo Wilson. Stevie.

574
00:39:10,120 --> 00:39:17,120
Speaker 1: Who is this your cousin? First? Third? Third? I don't

575
00:39:17,160 --> 00:39:23,560
Speaker 1: fucking know my third cousin. You know the bard by

576
00:39:23,640 --> 00:39:27,239
Speaker 1: on the bar down to stand down in downtown. Look,

577
00:39:27,480 --> 00:39:32,480
Speaker 1: third cousin means we have the same great great grandparents. Okay,

578
00:39:33,640 --> 00:39:36,600
Speaker 1: I've seen you at the family reunions and whatnot. Should

579
00:39:36,640 --> 00:39:40,200
Speaker 1: I come back or no? No, I think it's I

580
00:39:40,239 --> 00:39:42,200
Speaker 1: think it's going good. He'll he'll have the mayor talk

581
00:39:42,239 --> 00:39:47,000
Speaker 1: to you a seconds. Just what I hate to to

582
00:39:47,440 --> 00:39:50,960
Speaker 1: pull family rank with with this issue, and forgive me

583
00:39:51,080 --> 00:39:55,440
Speaker 1: for taking up your valuable time. But uh, the board,

584
00:39:55,560 --> 00:39:58,720
Speaker 1: the council whatever, wants to revoke my liquor license because

585
00:39:58,800 --> 00:40:01,319
Speaker 1: we just renamed the are and they don't like the name.

586
00:40:01,400 --> 00:40:04,520
Speaker 1: It's censorship. It's a clear case of censorship. I remember this.

587
00:40:04,640 --> 00:40:07,319
Speaker 1: You opened a teddy bar. That's the way. So that's

588
00:40:07,360 --> 00:40:10,440
Speaker 1: the name of the bar. Yeah, you can't open a

589
00:40:10,480 --> 00:40:14,120
Speaker 1: teddy bar. No, no, it's not a teddy bar. It's

590
00:40:14,200 --> 00:40:19,399
Speaker 1: called teddy bar. Alright, we're splitting hairs here. No, we're

591
00:40:19,440 --> 00:40:22,480
Speaker 1: not splitting hairs either. When it's a bar, it's a

592
00:40:22,520 --> 00:40:25,200
Speaker 1: normal bar. People come to regulars. I got customers up

593
00:40:25,239 --> 00:40:27,799
Speaker 1: to wazoo, but suddenly that I'm not allowed to use

594
00:40:27,880 --> 00:40:30,200
Speaker 1: the name. It's the same customers. They're not offended by

595
00:40:30,239 --> 00:40:34,840
Speaker 1: the name. How many kinds of not you have one? Alright,

596
00:40:34,880 --> 00:40:39,040
Speaker 1: I'm closing you down. I'm sure this phone call is

597
00:40:39,080 --> 00:40:42,800
Speaker 1: going better than it sounds. All right, welcome to ABC

598
00:40:42,960 --> 00:40:46,680
Speaker 1: bartender here. Everyone here's looks excited to be a bartender

599
00:40:46,719 --> 00:40:49,239
Speaker 1: and that's great. Now, first off, all right, what you

600
00:40:49,320 --> 00:40:51,960
Speaker 1: need to know about bartender it's not much as not

601
00:40:52,160 --> 00:40:54,919
Speaker 1: as much as it is making drinks is as much

602
00:40:54,960 --> 00:40:58,279
Speaker 1: as it is making friends. All right, so let's make

603
00:40:58,320 --> 00:41:00,919
Speaker 1: sure to keep those smiles up and get that energy, okay,

604
00:41:00,960 --> 00:41:04,640
Speaker 1: because we're serving feelings. Yeah, when do we get to

605
00:41:04,840 --> 00:41:07,320
Speaker 1: use the shaker? Soon? Soon, we'll get to use the

606
00:41:07,320 --> 00:41:11,560
Speaker 1: sh I'm excited to use that shaker. Yeah. Yeah, spinner around.

607
00:41:11,600 --> 00:41:14,080
Speaker 1: You're gonna teach us to spinning around? Okay? All right,

608
00:41:14,120 --> 00:41:15,839
Speaker 1: let's care for what with all the tools in front

609
00:41:15,880 --> 00:41:21,279
Speaker 1: of us? All right, let's just see from Connecticut? Very cool?

610
00:41:21,280 --> 00:41:25,359
Speaker 1: All right, anybody else from Connecticut? I am also from Connecticut.

611
00:41:26,880 --> 00:41:31,640
Speaker 1: From Connecticut to where are you guys from in Connecticut?

612
00:41:37,440 --> 00:41:46,600
Speaker 1: Mersitusetts Hamlet? Okay, alright, sorry, I don't remember that place.

613
00:41:47,120 --> 00:41:49,319
Speaker 1: Let's be careful. It looks like that young lady is uh,

614
00:41:49,520 --> 00:41:51,520
Speaker 1: I don't know, dropping into some kind of liquid form.

615
00:41:51,880 --> 00:41:55,279
Speaker 1: So everybody here, let's let's all just take a thing

616
00:41:55,360 --> 00:41:56,560
Speaker 1: here to know what we got in front of us, right,

617
00:41:56,600 --> 00:41:59,400
Speaker 1: we got a citrus cutter, all right, we gotta sir,

618
00:41:59,560 --> 00:42:01,920
Speaker 1: don't yeah, okay, we're not gonna shake until it is

619
00:42:01,960 --> 00:42:04,360
Speaker 1: who we're mixing. So we got our mixer here, and

620
00:42:05,000 --> 00:42:08,799
Speaker 1: then what is the substance in the middle of this olive? Uh?

621
00:42:09,400 --> 00:42:16,000
Speaker 1: That is a ship? What is that that's pimento jagof

622
00:42:18,040 --> 00:42:24,719
Speaker 1: You just passed the class. You just pass the class. Yeah,

623
00:42:25,760 --> 00:42:28,960
Speaker 1: in your face, dog, dog, Why are you showing at me?

624
00:42:29,120 --> 00:42:35,560
Speaker 1: I'm classmate if you're from Connecticut, from Connecticut. So I'm

625
00:42:35,600 --> 00:42:37,640
Speaker 1: just trying to be friendly. I'm trying to make friends

626
00:42:37,680 --> 00:42:43,840
Speaker 1: and make drinks. What's your dog? Yeah? Speak up for yourself.

627
00:42:43,920 --> 00:42:46,839
Speaker 1: What do you name your bar? Oh? My bar? Yeah,

628
00:42:46,880 --> 00:42:49,200
Speaker 1: I was gonna name it. It was just gonna be

629
00:42:49,520 --> 00:42:54,160
Speaker 1: drinks with friends, drinks with friends. It's just that's actually

630
00:42:54,239 --> 00:42:58,440
Speaker 1: kind of cool. Like you all right there, So we're

631
00:42:58,480 --> 00:43:00,759
Speaker 1: gonna do the promo for drinks with ens. Now, this

632
00:43:00,920 --> 00:43:04,800
Speaker 1: is going to be a statewide uh ad, So just

633
00:43:04,920 --> 00:43:07,480
Speaker 1: have fun with it and whenever you're ready. I thought

634
00:43:07,520 --> 00:43:10,959
Speaker 1: there was gonna be a lot of extras here. I thought,

635
00:43:11,239 --> 00:43:13,120
Speaker 1: I don't know if I'm ready to shoot this commercial.

636
00:43:13,200 --> 00:43:15,520
Speaker 1: I wanted it to look like this place was really busy.

637
00:43:16,200 --> 00:43:19,479
Speaker 1: We still got a socially distance. Yeah, we're not allowed

638
00:43:19,480 --> 00:43:21,080
Speaker 1: to have so many people inside. Okay, so let's just

639
00:43:21,080 --> 00:43:23,520
Speaker 1: go from the top. Let's go whoa wa wait, wait,

640
00:43:23,719 --> 00:43:26,239
Speaker 1: maybe I should hold production for like a couple of weeks.

641
00:43:26,320 --> 00:43:27,680
Speaker 1: I want it like I want it to look like

642
00:43:27,719 --> 00:43:29,960
Speaker 1: there's a lot of people like a friend, let's friends.

643
00:43:30,520 --> 00:43:35,279
Speaker 1: I'm just sitting by myself at this bar, sad we're

644
00:43:35,320 --> 00:43:38,719
Speaker 1: here to shoot. I mean, you don't get design when

645
00:43:38,760 --> 00:43:43,080
Speaker 1: we hold production. I'm kind of well, I know, but

646
00:43:43,080 --> 00:43:44,520
Speaker 1: I'm kind of paying for it. I just don't know

647
00:43:44,560 --> 00:43:46,600
Speaker 1: if this is gonna be good commercial I want to

648
00:43:46,640 --> 00:43:49,680
Speaker 1: make Look sir, you pay this either way, So either

649
00:43:49,840 --> 00:43:51,279
Speaker 1: we do it now or you're gonna have to pace

650
00:43:51,360 --> 00:43:53,080
Speaker 1: again to come back and shoot the thing. Okay, so

651
00:43:53,239 --> 00:43:58,360
Speaker 1: you're lunch everybody. Okay, we're gonna take forty five minutes

652
00:43:58,400 --> 00:44:00,720
Speaker 1: for lunch. This is the French. We're didn't runch hours

653
00:44:01,239 --> 00:44:05,319
Speaker 1: looks forty five. It's just a giant bowl of brazil nuts.

654
00:44:06,840 --> 00:44:10,040
Speaker 1: That scene too, that scene too, don't try to extend it.

655
00:44:10,080 --> 00:44:21,960
Speaker 1: I won't have an oh baby. Three comes from Patron

656
00:44:22,080 --> 00:44:26,760
Speaker 1: v I P member Rachel. Hey, Alchemists, the recent episodes

657
00:44:26,800 --> 00:44:29,160
Speaker 1: have been getting me through the quarantine, so thanks so

658
00:44:29,320 --> 00:44:31,759
Speaker 1: much for keeping them coming. I love you all. But

659
00:44:31,880 --> 00:44:34,920
Speaker 1: in the spirit of singling out our fades, I have

660
00:44:35,120 --> 00:44:38,399
Speaker 1: to say that pretty much everything Joey says makes me laugh.

661
00:44:38,800 --> 00:44:44,040
Speaker 1: I love Chris too, especially his highly accurate foreign accents.

662
00:44:44,080 --> 00:44:47,120
Speaker 1: Now see that seems like a backwards kind of compliment.

663
00:44:47,560 --> 00:44:53,040
Speaker 1: I don't know. Thank you, well, it's an accurate compliment. Also,

664
00:44:53,360 --> 00:44:57,120
Speaker 1: love when the show gets meta and you make fun

665
00:44:57,200 --> 00:44:59,600
Speaker 1: of each other. Hey, fuck you, and a scene s

666
00:45:00,040 --> 00:45:03,239
Speaker 1: uestion for you that I hope will be fun. A

667
00:45:03,520 --> 00:45:07,360
Speaker 1: clue style haunted house, Who Done It? Murder mystery with

668
00:45:07,480 --> 00:45:10,840
Speaker 1: campy characters and blood to his galore. Thanks again for

669
00:45:10,880 --> 00:45:17,960
Speaker 1: the last Rachel from Philly. Right this way, professor. The

670
00:45:18,040 --> 00:45:22,200
Speaker 1: others are in the drawing room have already arrived. May

671
00:45:22,239 --> 00:45:26,320
Speaker 1: I take your coat? Please do and hang it up nicely.

672
00:45:26,480 --> 00:45:29,960
Speaker 1: This is a very expensive coat. I shall use two hangers.

673
00:45:31,320 --> 00:45:34,120
Speaker 1: Thank you for joining us, Thank you for having me.

674
00:45:34,719 --> 00:45:41,439
Speaker 1: Beware of where did you go? Okay, so you're telling

675
00:45:41,560 --> 00:45:45,440
Speaker 1: me that you got some information about this event. I

676
00:45:45,760 --> 00:45:48,480
Speaker 1: don't know. Here, for God's sake, I don't know any

677
00:45:48,520 --> 00:45:51,120
Speaker 1: of you people. All of us share the same letter.

678
00:45:51,760 --> 00:45:56,520
Speaker 1: We all have the same letter. Envirotum've just arrived. Oh

679
00:45:56,600 --> 00:46:00,279
Speaker 1: I've got a letter to who with the elaborate must stars.

680
00:46:00,840 --> 00:46:11,520
Speaker 1: I'm a professor, a professor of what science? Professor science geology,

681
00:46:12,920 --> 00:46:17,320
Speaker 1: the study of Earth, the geology. Why not lead with

682
00:46:17,440 --> 00:46:20,279
Speaker 1: that if that's what you do. I just didn't know.

683
00:46:20,840 --> 00:46:23,200
Speaker 1: I didn't I don't know what level you guys, and

684
00:46:23,280 --> 00:46:28,400
Speaker 1: I didn't want to. Oh, I understand the word geology. Colonel.

685
00:46:28,440 --> 00:46:31,440
Speaker 1: Can I talk to you for a second. Sure, I

686
00:46:31,480 --> 00:46:33,160
Speaker 1: don't know what the hell is going on? But if anything,

687
00:46:33,600 --> 00:46:37,799
Speaker 1: if anyone's guilty, it's that guy right there. He's immediately suspicious.

688
00:46:37,800 --> 00:46:41,480
Speaker 1: Don't listen to us. What are you doing? Right? Sorry?

689
00:46:41,560 --> 00:46:49,879
Speaker 1: I'm light right, Hi, welcome to me. Hi. I'm a geologist.

690
00:46:50,160 --> 00:46:52,440
Speaker 1: I just want to write upfront, tell you I studied

691
00:46:52,520 --> 00:46:55,400
Speaker 1: geology and Asia. What's your fucking name? I want to

692
00:46:55,440 --> 00:46:59,880
Speaker 1: know your name? Who leads with what? I don't know? Brian?

693
00:47:00,000 --> 00:47:06,040
Speaker 1: My name is probably right right, Professor Brian. Brian's my

694
00:47:06,120 --> 00:47:11,600
Speaker 1: first name, pempcas last name, Brian Pempkiss. Professor Brian Pempkiss, giologist, extraordinary.

695
00:47:12,360 --> 00:47:17,440
Speaker 1: You're sweating, Mr pempkissing. Oh well, it's hot in here.

696
00:47:17,480 --> 00:47:19,200
Speaker 1: I can't be the only one to touch. What a

697
00:47:19,239 --> 00:47:24,440
Speaker 1: strange welcome? Where is that voice crapping from? If you

698
00:47:24,640 --> 00:47:30,759
Speaker 1: received a letter in the right place? Good? Now, in

699
00:47:31,000 --> 00:47:37,200
Speaker 1: three seconds, the lights will go out, and when one

700
00:47:37,280 --> 00:47:49,759
Speaker 1: of you, three lights are out. Now, who is the

701
00:47:49,920 --> 00:47:54,440
Speaker 1: lights are on, which one of you is dead? And

702
00:47:55,480 --> 00:48:01,160
Speaker 1: I'm alive alive. I'm also alive. I've been stamped. You're

703
00:48:01,160 --> 00:48:05,800
Speaker 1: a wife. I'm still alive. I'm still alive, sir. But

704
00:48:05,920 --> 00:48:09,879
Speaker 1: I've been stabbed. I fear it's morally. Oh my god.

705
00:48:10,480 --> 00:48:13,480
Speaker 1: This guy was dying but not dead. In his eye.

706
00:48:13,520 --> 00:48:19,160
Speaker 1: The knife is in his eye. Welcome, welcome. We're gonna

707
00:48:19,200 --> 00:48:23,600
Speaker 1: try this again when I'm finished. When I'm done speaking,

708
00:48:23,719 --> 00:48:30,520
Speaker 1: the lights will go off. Is it. Hopefully when the

709
00:48:30,640 --> 00:48:33,760
Speaker 1: lights come back up, one of you to be fully

710
00:48:34,239 --> 00:48:39,520
Speaker 1: fully dead? Is the one that's already started? Is he done? Pausing?

711
00:48:45,960 --> 00:48:51,160
Speaker 1: I've been stabbed in the other eye. Is it's not

712
00:48:51,400 --> 00:48:54,000
Speaker 1: like murder? Is just like my men? That's not right.

713
00:48:55,200 --> 00:49:02,360
Speaker 1: He's so calm. Then my my side is dead. I know. Okay, well, okay,

714
00:49:02,719 --> 00:49:06,000
Speaker 1: it's still not what we were promised. I'll be honest.

715
00:49:06,040 --> 00:49:08,120
Speaker 1: That second knife was me because I just wanted to

716
00:49:08,160 --> 00:49:12,040
Speaker 1: fetish that. Wait a second, The first time was not me,

717
00:49:12,600 --> 00:49:14,759
Speaker 1: but the second night was also me too. I also

718
00:49:14,800 --> 00:49:16,560
Speaker 1: stabbed him in the eye as well. Wait a minute,

719
00:49:16,800 --> 00:49:19,320
Speaker 1: also stebbed in the eye. Which one of you didn't

720
00:49:19,400 --> 00:49:24,520
Speaker 1: stab me? Pemcs, try you just called me. I just

721
00:49:24,600 --> 00:49:31,160
Speaker 1: called you. Guys have already admitted to it. I said,

722
00:49:31,200 --> 00:49:33,759
Speaker 1: I didn't do it, but we don't know who did

723
00:49:33,800 --> 00:49:38,000
Speaker 1: the first stabbing. It wasn't me. I mean, he's clearly

724
00:49:38,040 --> 00:49:42,720
Speaker 1: on the other side of his table. Oh it's time

725
00:49:42,880 --> 00:49:48,440
Speaker 1: for another it's not it's not the door. It's just

726
00:49:49,760 --> 00:49:52,880
Speaker 1: is there someone at the door? Also, you wouldn't answer

727
00:49:53,160 --> 00:49:56,680
Speaker 1: the door at someone else's home. You just relax now,

728
00:49:57,200 --> 00:50:02,160
Speaker 1: I would just say dig dog if nobody ding dong

729
00:50:02,280 --> 00:50:05,239
Speaker 1: about okay, just it was a way for me to enter,

730
00:50:05,760 --> 00:50:08,680
Speaker 1: to let you know I'm coming back on that. We're

731
00:50:08,719 --> 00:50:11,680
Speaker 1: not ridiculous. You just start talking. We know you're back

732
00:50:13,400 --> 00:50:19,160
Speaker 1: as a pattern. Okay, okay, that's with the guy with

733
00:50:19,280 --> 00:50:22,080
Speaker 1: the knives in his eyes. Plumb a kiss. Why don't

734
00:50:22,080 --> 00:50:24,120
Speaker 1: you back off? For all we know you've killed this guy.

735
00:50:24,680 --> 00:50:29,320
Speaker 1: If I'm not, he's still alive. Can I just twisted in? Okay?

736
00:50:29,640 --> 00:50:35,520
Speaker 1: Here ding dong, someone's at the door. No, it's me again,

737
00:50:35,960 --> 00:50:40,239
Speaker 1: it's me. Who are you when? If you want to

738
00:50:40,320 --> 00:50:44,839
Speaker 1: know who thrust the first knife? No, it's at the door.

739
00:50:46,560 --> 00:50:48,800
Speaker 1: Come back in the room. Can you hold on for

740
00:50:48,880 --> 00:50:51,239
Speaker 1: one second for him to come? I can't giving a.

741
00:50:53,200 --> 00:50:59,320
Speaker 1: I know we clue. One's at the door, okay, in

742
00:50:59,360 --> 00:51:04,759
Speaker 1: a green tin pain tinkle tinkle, little star tinkle. How

743
00:51:04,880 --> 00:51:10,520
Speaker 1: I wonder letter r I wonder? Let her are stars

744
00:51:10,560 --> 00:51:17,640
Speaker 1: a pain? Now? Is that it the sky? You see? Stars?

745
00:51:18,600 --> 00:51:23,759
Speaker 1: Can see? I see Clint Eastwood and it looks like

746
00:51:23,920 --> 00:51:27,520
Speaker 1: Susanne summer A speaking metaphorically. Hold on a second. There's

747
00:51:27,520 --> 00:51:29,279
Speaker 1: a Clin Eastwood post her right here on the wall,

748
00:51:30,040 --> 00:51:33,759
Speaker 1: and a Three Company poster. I can't see those. Let

749
00:51:33,800 --> 00:51:35,719
Speaker 1: me take this Cliniceswood poster and let me match it

750
00:51:35,840 --> 00:51:38,120
Speaker 1: up perfectly to the Three Company. Oh my god, it

751
00:51:38,239 --> 00:51:44,000
Speaker 1: opened a door ding dong the door door. No, no, no, no,

752
00:51:44,360 --> 00:51:47,040
Speaker 1: you have now unlocked. I'll get it. No, there's no

753
00:51:48,120 --> 00:51:49,799
Speaker 1: Can you wait for a second. Let me just ask

754
00:51:49,880 --> 00:51:52,920
Speaker 1: you about the first clue. I'm a scientist, okay, and

755
00:51:52,960 --> 00:51:58,360
Speaker 1: first clue has already been solved about was the ringing

756
00:51:58,440 --> 00:52:01,840
Speaker 1: of the door about There's no way to describe exactly

757
00:52:01,880 --> 00:52:09,080
Speaker 1: how much pain I mean, there's no You've already tried

758
00:52:09,200 --> 00:52:13,759
Speaker 1: and failed. Now enter the new passageway. Will leave you

759
00:52:14,080 --> 00:52:20,040
Speaker 1: with this. The passageway just opened. Mary had a little hand.

760
00:52:22,760 --> 00:52:27,000
Speaker 1: Mary had a little hand. There's the door and look

761
00:52:27,080 --> 00:52:30,680
Speaker 1: for the baby end and that letter are part of

762
00:52:30,719 --> 00:52:34,879
Speaker 1: the previous clue didn't add up to much. There's really

763
00:52:35,200 --> 00:52:41,640
Speaker 1: the first I think the Clint Eastwood. There's no Clint Eastwood.

764
00:52:42,719 --> 00:52:45,120
Speaker 1: He said it. I was just agreeing. But just think

765
00:52:45,120 --> 00:52:48,239
Speaker 1: about it. To go through the scientific hypothesis. Is there

766
00:52:48,280 --> 00:52:56,160
Speaker 1: an are work up? Susan summers ours there's all but course, listen,

767
00:52:56,640 --> 00:53:04,960
Speaker 1: tinkle already solved. But what was r You've already solved it.

768
00:53:05,120 --> 00:53:09,160
Speaker 1: You're now into the new room. I will repeat the

769
00:53:09,280 --> 00:53:15,440
Speaker 1: second clue. I need closure, Mary hand right, is there

770
00:53:15,480 --> 00:53:18,879
Speaker 1: anybody here named Mary? You with a cocky accent? What's

771
00:53:18,920 --> 00:53:23,920
Speaker 1: your name? Well, there we go, but let me let

772
00:53:24,000 --> 00:53:26,600
Speaker 1: me see your hands. Let me see your hands and

773
00:53:28,200 --> 00:53:36,960
Speaker 1: those are normal sized. Twinkle twinkle little star is spelled

774
00:53:37,040 --> 00:53:39,000
Speaker 1: t W But he took it out and put it

775
00:53:42,200 --> 00:53:46,120
Speaker 1: so to use us. Us was replaced with an odd

776
00:53:46,200 --> 00:53:50,160
Speaker 1: thing and he was stepped in the professor Pinkinton. Note,

777
00:53:50,280 --> 00:53:53,279
Speaker 1: please please open that again. It's letting the a c

778
00:53:53,480 --> 00:53:59,400
Speaker 1: out was hot in here, so keep the door closed. Okay,

779
00:53:59,480 --> 00:54:02,600
Speaker 1: you've you have solved half of the first clue. There

780
00:54:02,719 --> 00:54:05,719
Speaker 1: is a marry now hand, I've got to hand it

781
00:54:05,800 --> 00:54:13,960
Speaker 1: to you. See there was the letter you. Yeah, take

782
00:54:14,000 --> 00:54:17,479
Speaker 1: the ws out of twinkle to make tinkle. Uh, there's

783
00:54:17,520 --> 00:54:20,520
Speaker 1: an R and there's a u W R are you?

784
00:54:21,880 --> 00:54:24,839
Speaker 1: And and keep in mind keep in mind that when

785
00:54:24,880 --> 00:54:27,560
Speaker 1: he said hand, he said it with a question mark hand.

786
00:54:29,000 --> 00:54:34,279
Speaker 1: What are you a doctor? And again geog okay, which

787
00:54:34,360 --> 00:54:40,279
Speaker 1: is the study of the earth. Yeah, let's uh, but

788
00:54:40,600 --> 00:54:43,360
Speaker 1: but but I took lots of miners and different sciences.

789
00:54:44,640 --> 00:54:47,640
Speaker 1: I've got a lot of expertise in many sciences. Well,

790
00:54:47,680 --> 00:54:50,600
Speaker 1: there's a there's a g od here with what's this

791
00:54:50,719 --> 00:54:55,479
Speaker 1: doing here? Well? This, this is a polished outside. Please

792
00:54:55,520 --> 00:54:57,799
Speaker 1: don't touch the geo. That's not part of what's going

793
00:54:57,880 --> 00:55:04,920
Speaker 1: on here or something. No, no, that's not true. You're

794
00:55:05,160 --> 00:55:08,320
Speaker 1: start breaking everything in this room. There's there's got to

795
00:55:08,360 --> 00:55:14,040
Speaker 1: be something outside. Please please do not, please please, it's

796
00:55:14,040 --> 00:55:21,560
Speaker 1: just a fantastic gel. Why are you congratulations you've now

797
00:55:21,680 --> 00:55:30,120
Speaker 1: moved on to the final chapter. Smash it up, smash

798
00:55:30,160 --> 00:55:34,800
Speaker 1: it well, h E double L what does that spell?

799
00:55:35,920 --> 00:55:41,200
Speaker 1: It spells? We just smash the other room. You think

800
00:55:41,239 --> 00:55:46,279
Speaker 1: he's getting the clues like mixed up? They're out of order. Yeah,

801
00:55:47,520 --> 00:55:55,359
Speaker 1: this one's the hand one, you said, Ding dong ding

802
00:55:55,400 --> 00:55:59,120
Speaker 1: dong supposed to show your arrival. Yeah, that's what I'm here.

803
00:55:59,560 --> 00:56:02,120
Speaker 1: But you no ding dong, so you should say ding

804
00:56:02,200 --> 00:56:12,000
Speaker 1: dong no? Okay, ding dong no? Okay. Is the man

805
00:56:12,520 --> 00:56:16,799
Speaker 1: with the knives still alive? Oh? Yes, he stopped talking.

806
00:56:16,840 --> 00:56:20,680
Speaker 1: I don't know. He probably room we did. Hey you

807
00:56:21,840 --> 00:56:25,239
Speaker 1: still alive? I mean I'm not completely dead. Okay, he's

808
00:56:25,239 --> 00:56:27,759
Speaker 1: still alive. He's still alive. Should we finish them all?

809
00:56:28,320 --> 00:56:32,560
Speaker 1: Somebody was here? Somebody was here. Wait, what the package?

810
00:56:32,600 --> 00:56:34,759
Speaker 1: I've been waiting for a package? Are they? They asked

811
00:56:34,760 --> 00:56:35,920
Speaker 1: me to sign for it, I said, tol him to

812
00:56:35,960 --> 00:56:39,960
Speaker 1: funk off. Okay, let smash it up special well H

813
00:56:40,120 --> 00:56:44,640
Speaker 1: double l the old nursey rey ro I'm usually says

814
00:56:44,840 --> 00:56:50,320
Speaker 1: h E double hockey stick. It's not really a nursery

815
00:56:50,440 --> 00:56:55,480
Speaker 1: rve you remember? H doesn't feel appropriate. I just want

816
00:56:55,520 --> 00:56:58,080
Speaker 1: to say, professor, I love your book. Um. I think

817
00:56:58,120 --> 00:57:01,800
Speaker 1: it's fantastic that someone in the geology field will go

818
00:57:01,840 --> 00:57:04,200
Speaker 1: off to write a novel like this. And I know

819
00:57:04,400 --> 00:57:06,960
Speaker 1: some of it is probably stretching the truth, but it

820
00:57:07,040 --> 00:57:09,320
Speaker 1: was none of this is this is this is a

821
00:57:09,400 --> 00:57:16,280
Speaker 1: nonfiction book. It's it's nonfiction. Oh okay, Um can we

822
00:57:16,400 --> 00:57:17,880
Speaker 1: keep the line moving. Theres a lot of people want

823
00:57:17,880 --> 00:57:20,720
Speaker 1: to get a signing. Yes, sorry, um, you can just

824
00:57:20,800 --> 00:57:25,600
Speaker 1: make it out to Tina please Tina t I n

825
00:57:26,160 --> 00:57:32,880
Speaker 1: A Tina signed Brian there here? Do you sign your

826
00:57:32,920 --> 00:57:35,240
Speaker 1: last name too? Are you gonna have high tay together?

827
00:57:35,400 --> 00:57:38,520
Speaker 1: Come on, let's move the line for fox sake. Sorry. Sorry,

828
00:57:40,000 --> 00:57:42,640
Speaker 1: my fans are traditionally not the most friendly. You're the

829
00:57:42,760 --> 00:57:47,960
Speaker 1: nicest fan I've had come up here. Alright, kiss, alright,

830
00:57:48,920 --> 00:57:51,160
Speaker 1: there you go, and you should probably go there getting

831
00:57:51,200 --> 00:57:53,320
Speaker 1: unruly behind you than you did. You mind making this

832
00:57:53,480 --> 00:57:55,520
Speaker 1: like a little personal like a little personal note in there,

833
00:57:55,560 --> 00:57:57,919
Speaker 1: so I know it's like just for me. I just don't.

834
00:57:57,920 --> 00:58:01,080
Speaker 1: I don't know you very well. Okay to the nicest

835
00:58:01,160 --> 00:58:05,920
Speaker 1: fan in the book, signing mine. Oh I'm running out

836
00:58:05,960 --> 00:58:07,840
Speaker 1: of room. It's just crunched at the side. There you go.

837
00:58:08,200 --> 00:58:09,800
Speaker 1: I'll just flip it over, flip the page over, just

838
00:58:09,920 --> 00:58:15,520
Speaker 1: just just flip it over. What is happening? Excuse me,

839
00:58:15,600 --> 00:58:18,560
Speaker 1: You've got to step away from the desk. I'm just please,

840
00:58:18,600 --> 00:58:22,080
Speaker 1: please just just sign the rest of it, please. I finished,

841
00:58:22,120 --> 00:58:24,920
Speaker 1: I wrapped it up. There's nothing really more. Just signed

842
00:58:24,960 --> 00:58:27,720
Speaker 1: the rest of the book, please, please, what do you

843
00:58:27,760 --> 00:58:31,720
Speaker 1: want them to sign every page of Freak? First of all,

844
00:58:31,800 --> 00:58:33,800
Speaker 1: she's a very nice fan, and I'm trying to treat

845
00:58:33,840 --> 00:58:39,120
Speaker 1: everybody respectful. Dong. Barnes and Noble will be closing in

846
00:58:39,160 --> 00:58:43,200
Speaker 1: fifteen minutes. Oh so I really have to finish up.

847
00:58:43,240 --> 00:58:45,840
Speaker 1: You take this, and and I got to sign the

848
00:58:45,880 --> 00:58:48,560
Speaker 1: next book. Thank you, thank you. Hey did you just

849
00:58:48,680 --> 00:58:52,680
Speaker 1: have PTSD when that dingding happened? How did you? How

850
00:58:52,720 --> 00:58:59,120
Speaker 1: did you know? There your face? Now sign my fucking book, Plencus,

851
00:59:04,760 --> 00:59:06,800
Speaker 1: It's spelled wrong on the cover of your book. I'll

852
00:59:06,800 --> 00:59:09,560
Speaker 1: tell you that. What the fuck? What the fuck is this?

853
00:59:13,080 --> 00:59:19,320
Speaker 1: Just change your accent? Why the hell are you mad

854
00:59:19,400 --> 00:59:21,080
Speaker 1: at this? Now? The book has been published, it's been

855
00:59:21,120 --> 00:59:26,400
Speaker 1: distributing the gun my name, you'll be spelled my name.

856
00:59:27,040 --> 00:59:30,520
Speaker 1: I mean, I'm sorry, Okay, Look, Penguin focks up sometimes.

857
00:59:30,680 --> 00:59:33,760
Speaker 1: But it's been out for months, months and you haven't

858
00:59:33,760 --> 00:59:36,280
Speaker 1: said a damn thing. I hadn't looked at it. It's

859
00:59:36,320 --> 00:59:38,080
Speaker 1: just I see my name so often I don't notice

860
00:59:38,160 --> 00:59:42,000
Speaker 1: until somebody tells me. Look, that's insane. That's a crazy

861
00:59:42,080 --> 00:59:46,040
Speaker 1: excuse to why excuse me, Colonel Fattius ketchup here? I

862
00:59:46,160 --> 00:59:49,040
Speaker 1: have a meeting with a Penguin editor to discuss my

863
00:59:49,240 --> 00:59:51,960
Speaker 1: upcoming book. Oh yes, sir, please come in. Oh you

864
00:59:52,040 --> 01:00:01,600
Speaker 1: do know each other? Oh please catch up. It's it's Pemcas.

865
01:00:02,040 --> 01:00:06,440
Speaker 1: I'm telling my side of the story to get the

866
01:00:06,520 --> 01:00:10,960
Speaker 1: little truth out there. You stabbed that man, always always

867
01:00:10,960 --> 01:00:17,440
Speaker 1: admitted that. Yep, I was Now ladsing, gentlemen, lady and gentlemen,

868
01:00:17,520 --> 01:00:20,160
Speaker 1: welcome to the live panel we've all been waiting for.

869
01:00:20,560 --> 01:00:23,840
Speaker 1: We've read each of their books. They're all number one

870
01:00:23,920 --> 01:00:26,880
Speaker 1: best sellers in the New York Times best Selling list. Um,

871
01:00:27,520 --> 01:00:34,360
Speaker 1: we are excited, Yes, yes, now we are excited to

872
01:00:34,560 --> 01:00:41,880
Speaker 1: ask some real questions and ask some fan questions. Uh. Yeah,

873
01:00:42,000 --> 01:00:45,360
Speaker 1: the coffee and the sugar is everything, there's free everything.

874
01:00:46,440 --> 01:00:48,760
Speaker 1: Well not. The cops are five dollars. I don't think

875
01:00:48,800 --> 01:00:51,400
Speaker 1: he's here for this panel. You should tell that person

876
01:00:51,480 --> 01:00:56,560
Speaker 1: to leave. They're they're just voyers. Okay, okay, listen, We're

877
01:00:56,640 --> 01:01:02,400
Speaker 1: all happy to have you. Uh Cockney, Tina um, that's

878
01:01:02,440 --> 01:01:09,160
Speaker 1: insane and Brian um. Now, honestly right, obviously some of

879
01:01:09,240 --> 01:01:12,040
Speaker 1: you are missing, and that's what we want to get into.

880
01:01:12,160 --> 01:01:14,680
Speaker 1: So do we have any questions from the audience about

881
01:01:15,080 --> 01:01:21,880
Speaker 1: what happened that fat question. Yes, sir, he's not even

882
01:01:21,960 --> 01:01:24,360
Speaker 1: here to see us. He's at the coffee path. I

883
01:01:24,440 --> 01:01:32,680
Speaker 1: got a question. Yeah you'll remember me. Oh we left

884
01:01:32,720 --> 01:01:34,960
Speaker 1: it for dead. Yeah, that's right, he left me for

885
01:01:35,120 --> 01:01:42,640
Speaker 1: fucking dead. I guess she's back. Bitches, huh me. We

886
01:01:42,760 --> 01:01:45,840
Speaker 1: never learned your name. No, you just kept going to

887
01:01:45,920 --> 01:01:48,880
Speaker 1: the door getting the door. I said my name so

888
01:01:49,040 --> 01:01:51,400
Speaker 1: many fucking times in front of you, guys, and you

889
01:01:51,560 --> 01:01:56,280
Speaker 1: never remembered it. Just one donut? Can you have more

890
01:01:56,360 --> 01:01:59,680
Speaker 1: than one? Well, we can only have one person screaming

891
01:01:59,720 --> 01:02:07,680
Speaker 1: about the stuff in the back my bad? Oh my god?

892
01:02:07,800 --> 01:02:10,760
Speaker 1: Is that is that the guy with the knives in

893
01:02:10,840 --> 01:02:20,959
Speaker 1: his eyes? Oh? My god? Ding dong. You all thought

894
01:02:21,040 --> 01:02:23,680
Speaker 1: you went on to live your happy little lives and

895
01:02:23,760 --> 01:02:26,000
Speaker 1: write your silly little books, and some of you thought

896
01:02:26,040 --> 01:02:28,720
Speaker 1: you died, and others are asking about donuts. But this

897
01:02:29,320 --> 01:02:32,400
Speaker 1: is the last chapter of the game. We're in h

898
01:02:32,640 --> 01:02:42,480
Speaker 1: double hockey sticks today, still there in H D H

899
01:02:42,640 --> 01:02:46,360
Speaker 1: E and h D double hockey Sticks. Thanks everyone for

900
01:02:46,440 --> 01:02:49,480
Speaker 1: being a part of the show today. Let's thank Let's

901
01:02:49,520 --> 01:02:52,120
Speaker 1: start with Jessica. Oh, thank you, Jessica, so very very much.

902
01:02:52,720 --> 01:02:55,720
Speaker 1: Thank you for having me and us a good boy.

903
01:02:55,920 --> 01:02:59,600
Speaker 1: Son is a good boy on the Instagram sound is

904
01:02:59,600 --> 01:03:04,680
Speaker 1: a good boy? I have? When is this birthday? January? Yeah,

905
01:03:05,600 --> 01:03:09,320
Speaker 1: you're already making plans, big, big ones, big time. We're

906
01:03:09,360 --> 01:03:13,640
Speaker 1: doing Ski Holiday. Whoa, I can't wait to hear about

907
01:03:13,840 --> 01:03:19,040
Speaker 1: Sunday is a good boy? And stad Christoperno, thank you

908
01:03:19,080 --> 01:03:21,280
Speaker 1: so very much for joining us, my dear friend. Thank

909
01:03:21,320 --> 01:03:23,600
Speaker 1: you for having me. I love you guys so much. Um,

910
01:03:24,040 --> 01:03:26,680
Speaker 1: keep chicking out already. Everybody that readit is fun. We

911
01:03:27,200 --> 01:03:29,320
Speaker 1: talk about each episode. It's a good time over there.

912
01:03:29,360 --> 01:03:33,480
Speaker 1: And that's alchemy, this pod on Reddit, Alchemy, this pod.

913
01:03:34,040 --> 01:03:36,400
Speaker 1: Greig Kowski, thank you so much for joining us all

914
01:03:36,400 --> 01:03:39,320
Speaker 1: the way from n C. That's right. I'm on the

915
01:03:39,400 --> 01:03:42,080
Speaker 1: East Coast for a while, so we're in different time zones,

916
01:03:42,160 --> 01:03:47,160
Speaker 1: but the comedy translates across any time zone. That's right

917
01:03:48,000 --> 01:03:52,400
Speaker 1: in North Carolina. It's nine, that's right, it's not changed.

918
01:03:52,480 --> 01:03:57,160
Speaker 1: Jesse Helm still at off as sweet. Uh. Well, thank

919
01:03:57,200 --> 01:03:59,520
Speaker 1: you for joining us. And James Eeney, what a pleasure.

920
01:04:00,000 --> 01:04:03,280
Speaker 1: Oh thanks for having me. Um. We put up the

921
01:04:03,400 --> 01:04:06,680
Speaker 1: first of the Zoom. It's been too long, but I've

922
01:04:06,920 --> 01:04:10,680
Speaker 1: started the efforts and the first episode of Zoom covid

923
01:04:10,880 --> 01:04:13,720
Speaker 1: episodes went to Patreon, so they got to see one

924
01:04:13,800 --> 01:04:16,640
Speaker 1: of our one of our scenes. That's right. We record

925
01:04:16,720 --> 01:04:19,040
Speaker 1: these sessions on the Zoom. And so if you want

926
01:04:19,120 --> 01:04:23,320
Speaker 1: a visual to go with the audio, I guess you

927
01:04:23,440 --> 01:04:26,840
Speaker 1: need to become a Patreon member. Uh. And we appreciate

928
01:04:26,960 --> 01:04:29,120
Speaker 1: all the support from all of our Patreon v I,

929
01:04:29,240 --> 01:04:33,160
Speaker 1: P s and whatnot means the world to us, especially

930
01:04:33,160 --> 01:04:36,200
Speaker 1: in these times. So the little bonus material there. And

931
01:04:36,760 --> 01:04:41,439
Speaker 1: Joey Greer speaking of bonus material, Uh, tell us about

932
01:04:41,480 --> 01:04:45,800
Speaker 1: your upcoming show? Is it tonight every Wednesday, Westne Comedy Theater,

933
01:04:46,040 --> 01:04:50,120
Speaker 1: seven pm Pacific PDT. I don't know what the D

934
01:04:50,240 --> 01:04:54,000
Speaker 1: stands for. It's I thought it was PST Pacific Standard time.

935
01:04:54,600 --> 01:04:59,720
Speaker 1: I think it's p DT. Confirmed this because everything what

936
01:05:00,240 --> 01:05:04,960
Speaker 1: it's uh, and all the proceeds go to, uh your

937
01:05:05,120 --> 01:05:09,520
Speaker 1: future alimony? Is that right? No? I wish b LM

938
01:05:09,600 --> 01:05:13,080
Speaker 1: Los Angeles, Black Lives Matter Los Angeles, So the tickets

939
01:05:13,280 --> 01:05:17,880
Speaker 1: for the show go to there, so supporting a good cause. Uh.

940
01:05:18,000 --> 01:05:19,760
Speaker 1: And then I gotta make my own money to spend

941
01:05:19,800 --> 01:05:24,160
Speaker 1: on my alimony, which uh fucking sucks. Well good luck

942
01:05:24,200 --> 01:05:27,600
Speaker 1: with that. Yeah, let's thank our producer and engineer the Stars,

943
01:05:27,720 --> 01:05:34,360
Speaker 1: Mr Doug Bain. Fine folks that I heart media and

944
01:05:34,400 --> 01:05:36,160
Speaker 1: all of you find folks. Thank you for joining us.

945
01:05:36,160 --> 01:05:40,520
Speaker 1: Stay extremely safe and healthy. Please, I'm Kevin Pollock, your host.

946
01:05:40,800 --> 01:06:03,320
Speaker 1: Until next time, h