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Speaker 1: Hey guys, and welcome back to another week of Casual Chaos.

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Speaker 1: This week, I have a super exciting guest, one of

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Speaker 1: my Special Forces cast members, Jesse Smollette. Welcome to Casual.

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Speaker 2: Chaos, my sister, How are you hi?

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Speaker 1: I'm so good.

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Speaker 2: How are you so happy to see you?

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Speaker 1: Me too? I literally I even was just telling, like

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Speaker 1: my podcast producers and everything, whenever I talk to someone

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Speaker 1: from Special Forces, it just makes me so happy.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, me too, Me too.

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Speaker 1: We had such a good bond group.

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Speaker 2: Chat too, that's just ongoing. It's hilarious.

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Speaker 1: I love it. And we we really did like come

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Speaker 1: out of there as a family, and it was so

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Speaker 1: nice seeing everyone in LA and I really hope we

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Speaker 1: all keep a close bond, which I think we will.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I think we will too. And it's crazy that because.

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Speaker 3: I think, like when you do a production, it's usually lasts,

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Speaker 3: you know, at least longer than you know, a week

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Speaker 3: or so, and so it's just a different experience. But yeah,

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Speaker 3: the bonding that we I think it's because of the

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Speaker 3: we were with each other twenty four seven.

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Speaker 2: Oh yeah, and.

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Speaker 3: There was no way to there was no way to

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Speaker 3: just get out of it, you know, and so so

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Speaker 3: I think that there was a little bit of trauma bonding,

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Speaker 3: but it's still.

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Speaker 1: I think it was drama bonding.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, but you know what if that was the catalyst

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Speaker 3: to these amazing you know, new friendships and.

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Speaker 1: Soviet I mean truly and I talk about that all

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Speaker 1: the time. How our cast as a whole, every single

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Speaker 1: person was truly so amazing in their own way. And

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Speaker 1: the fact that we all kind of just meshed so well,

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Speaker 1: there was really no drama and we really Laura.

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Speaker 3: Kraft up here, I go off, go off, Yeah you kicked.

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Speaker 2: But it's funny because we all did kind of.

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Speaker 3: In a in our own ways, kind of fell into

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Speaker 3: the fell into line of like a family of like

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Speaker 3: even the places of a family.

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Speaker 2: And of course you were baby sister.

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Speaker 1: You know, let's start from the beginning.

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Speaker 2: But how are you good place to start?

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Speaker 1: How did special Forces come to you? How is this

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Speaker 1: opportunity brought to you?

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Speaker 3: It came two different times before this, So I think

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Speaker 3: I'm guessing that it was it was because it wasn't

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Speaker 3: season one, it was season.

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Speaker 2: Two, okay, and then I think and I think season three.

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Speaker 1: Oh, so they were recruiting Jesse.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, yeah, they wanted that interrogation room.

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Speaker 2: Bit that's what they wanted.

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Speaker 1: Let me tell you something about that interrogation room, something

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Speaker 1: about it made me so vulnerable.

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Speaker 2: But and then you leave. I remember I leave it

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Speaker 2: was either I think it was you who I was

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Speaker 2: just like I just want to push them in the face.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, yes, yeah, because you leave and.

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Speaker 3: You do feel you do feel so vulnerable in there,

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Speaker 3: and you feel you feel obligated to, in some weird

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Speaker 3: way obligated to share, you know, the truth with these

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Speaker 3: people and to talk to these people and bear yourself

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Speaker 3: like somehow like that's a part of the challenge almost,

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Speaker 3: And then you leave and you're like, why did I

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Speaker 3: give them that much, you know, at that time when

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Speaker 3: they don't even know me, you know. And so those

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Speaker 3: are the difficult things, and then that messes with your mond,

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Speaker 3: you know, further for the next challenge, and and it's

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Speaker 3: it's it's yeah, it's a whole mental I keep saying

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Speaker 3: that the physical part of it that was hard. Don't

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Speaker 3: get me wrong, that was really really difficult, but it

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Speaker 3: was the mental thing. It's the mental thing of like

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Speaker 3: losing your breath and not really knowing like what's happening,

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Speaker 3: and usually having control, usually having control of your body

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Speaker 3: and not really knowing for a quick second, like feeling

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Speaker 3: like you just don't have control over your body when

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Speaker 3: you're underneath that water.

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Speaker 2: When you.

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Speaker 3: Know, accidentally take a gulp of the water or you're

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Speaker 3: trying to get out and you're like there's not enough space,

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Speaker 3: Like if I get stuck down here, I'm stuck down

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Speaker 3: here and it doesn't matter. You know, you're thinking back

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Speaker 3: to the contract that said, oh, they're not responsible for

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Speaker 3: injury or death, and I'm like, which I responsible for?

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Speaker 1: We signed our life? Why?

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Speaker 2: I mean truly, And you're sitting there you're just like,

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Speaker 2: but why.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, because when you also think about it and we're

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Speaker 1: going into this interrogation room, ultimately, when we were together

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Speaker 1: as a cast, yes we bonded, we when we were

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Speaker 1: in the barrack and this and that, and yes, you

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Speaker 1: kind of get to know us during the physical challenges,

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Speaker 1: but during that interrogation room is really where you get

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Speaker 1: to kind of let out your truth.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: So that's where it's difficult because you know, even looking

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Speaker 1: back on first episode, I thought they did a great

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Speaker 1: job demonstrating Johnny Manzel's story. He took ownership, he took

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Speaker 1: accountability and what happened, and he you know, also spoke that, yes,

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Speaker 1: I have regret, like I wish I would have lived

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Speaker 1: out my NFL legacy, you know, I would have.

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Speaker 2: I wish I.

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Speaker 1: Would have lived that era of my life out. So

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Speaker 1: it really is your opportunity to kind of explain your story.

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Speaker 3: It is, and then it also is double sided because

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Speaker 3: there's also an edit. Of course, it's not like this

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Speaker 3: is a live a live scene.

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Speaker 1: And that's why I said in our group chat, though,

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Speaker 1: like he got a good cut, Like I loved the

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Speaker 1: way that they kind of portrayed that for him, you know,

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Speaker 1: but it was real life, like that really was his story.

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Speaker 1: But I thought he got such a kind of such

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Speaker 1: a nice intro to what who he was.

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Speaker 2: What hapens with us? Even though this is after of course.

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Speaker 3: But it's interesting because what I've experienced so far is

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Speaker 3: some of the stuff is so.

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Speaker 2: Funny, Like I posted that dagone thing of your mom.

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Speaker 3: Know, and why does your mom use the little baby words?

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Speaker 3: Like why does she say if anybody's gotta go poopy?

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Speaker 3: I'm like, it's so extra funny.

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Speaker 1: Well that's how she talked to us. Our entire lives

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Speaker 1: like I've never so it's all good. Yep. She would

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Speaker 1: never say like our private part, like the actual word,

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Speaker 1: Like I even feel funny saying it like she's chuck

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Speaker 1: Alina Bye.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, it's so funny.

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Speaker 3: I love Theresa. You have no idea that woman was

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Speaker 3: such to me. Was such a breath of fresh air. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: you know what I mean that she was. But she's

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Speaker 3: so ooh ooh protector ooh, protector mama bear mama, Yes, yes,

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Speaker 3: but yeah, going back to the uh, what I've experienced

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Speaker 3: also is people don't really and keep in mind, this

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Speaker 3: is my first time ever doing unscripted.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, so were you You had to have been a

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Speaker 1: little nervous.

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Speaker 2: Oh my god, you're kidding.

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Speaker 3: Absolutely, I'm always nervous when I'm going into something. And

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Speaker 3: I know the reason, the real reason behind why they

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Speaker 3: want me there. You know, it's not it doesn't matter

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Speaker 3: how many accolades I have, how many accomplishments I have.

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Speaker 3: I knew why essentially, like why they were asking me

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Speaker 3: that moment in my life and when they started asking

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Speaker 3: me why I was being asked.

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Speaker 2: And you know, so it is what it is.

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Speaker 3: But what I realized is is that people don't people

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Speaker 3: like the viewers don't realize that our sit down interviews

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Speaker 3: were done before any of this happened. So when it's

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Speaker 3: edited in things like and I'm not complaining because it's

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Speaker 3: a show, right, But what I'm saying is is that

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Speaker 3: when it's edited and it's like something bad happens in

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Speaker 3: our physical challenge, and then they go back to you

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Speaker 3: saying something like, yeah, I don't like being disrespected. You know,

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Speaker 3: people did da da da, And then it feels like,

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Speaker 3: oh my god, he said he was being disrespected because

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Speaker 3: they yelled there. No, no, it's me.

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Speaker 1: That is true. And I don't think I've said that

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Speaker 1: on Casual Chaos yet. But when we got to Morocco,

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Speaker 1: we had a couple of days where we kind of

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Speaker 1: did everything leading up to the show that the network

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Speaker 1: could have on the back end, like our confessions, like

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Speaker 1: our promo shoot, so you know, even for us girls,

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Speaker 1: they're like, oh, these girls are done up in hair

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Speaker 1: and makeup for in their army suits, like listen, it

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Speaker 1: was the promo shoot. Then when we got to the

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Speaker 1: base camp, it was real, raw and everything.

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Speaker 3: All the above things out of context can make can

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Speaker 3: represent certain things in a different way than it actually

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Speaker 3: factually is.

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Speaker 1: No, of course. I mean you could kind of feel

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Speaker 1: that emotion from you in the first episode, and I

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Speaker 1: guess I don't know what I was doing, but I

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Speaker 1: didn't catch that when Cody kind of, you know, it

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Speaker 1: was it was in a discreet way, but he he

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Speaker 1: asked you your first and last name, which you know,

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Speaker 1: again it's your first time meeting you know, it was

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Speaker 1: our first time, I pretty much my first time meeting

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Speaker 1: everyone besides Brianna, and I was just like, that's not

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Speaker 1: a friendly introduction like that obviously is going to make

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Speaker 1: you you feel a certain way.

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Speaker 2: But here's the thing. Here's the thing.

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Speaker 3: I went into it with my dukes further up than

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Speaker 3: they needed to be, so it and I can absolutely

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Speaker 3: say that honestly, so in the times that maybe if

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Speaker 3: I would have gone up with my duke's not up

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Speaker 3: at all, something like that possibly would have bothered me.

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Speaker 3: But and it did, but it didn't too. But I

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Speaker 3: was prepared, i should say, because the day before that

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Speaker 3: I had started seeing everybody around you know, the grand right,

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Speaker 3: And so even though like we weren't supposed to talk,

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Speaker 3: we weren't supposed to do anything like that, we were

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Speaker 3: all pretty much paired up like you were paired up

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Speaker 3: with your mom, and you know, the East and the

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Speaker 3: you know what I mean, like they were all they were.

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Speaker 3: They were pretty much everybody had like a crew, you know.

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Speaker 3: Even was my dog like my rod dog, right and so,

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Speaker 3: and she was the person that I knew, didn't know,

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Speaker 3: but I knew like in pastor you know, like you

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Speaker 3: see people at events and you're just like, hey, I

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Speaker 3: love your new project. Hey, congratulations, you know you're doing great,

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Speaker 3: keep it going, and you and and and they say

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Speaker 3: the exact same thing to you. It was that type

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Speaker 3: of friendship type, not friendship, that type of relationship. And

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Speaker 3: then but I knew she was cool. So but she

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Speaker 3: had kind of filled me in and told me who

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Speaker 3: people were, and so I googled them.

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Speaker 2: I googled them before I put in my phone. I googled.

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Speaker 3: Research, you know what I mean, I did some of

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Speaker 3: my research. And so I went in and I was like, all, so,

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Speaker 3: who's going to be.

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Speaker 2: The the one? You know?

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Speaker 3: And I thought that it was going to be Cody,

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Speaker 3: and I didn't see I didn't get that from him.

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Speaker 3: That's the thing, that's the thing that I respect about

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Speaker 3: the man is that I didn't get that from him,

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Speaker 3: and I've been saying that.

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Speaker 2: Then I saw the clip and I saw.

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Speaker 3: That the MOFO said about second chance, and then I

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Speaker 3: want to be like, well hold up now, mofo, hold

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Speaker 3: up man.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, so for nothing though, he was kind of and listen,

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Speaker 1: I said this about Cody too. He really was like

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Speaker 1: probably the most fit out of all of us. Like

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Speaker 1: he he was a trooper, and I think.

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Speaker 3: He knew early early on that he was doing this,

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Speaker 3: and yeah, he definitely prepped for this.

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Speaker 1: He went in on this. Yeah, he killed it, and

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Speaker 1: he had you know, he had moments where I was like, Okay,

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Speaker 1: this guy is really trying to grow and he's trying

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Speaker 1: to you know, he's trying to reinvent himself as well

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Speaker 1: and just you know, do better. And he explained that

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Speaker 1: to us as well in the barracks as well. Okay,

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Speaker 1: you know I was a polygamist. Now I'm trying to

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Speaker 1: be a monogamist and only be with my one person.

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Speaker 1: And he explained that there were certain things that he

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Speaker 1: did in his life later he did, Oh I didn't

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Speaker 1: know that, Yeah he did. There's a clip of him

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Speaker 1: explaining to my mom, like I was a polygamist, and

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Speaker 1: she was like, Oh, I don't think she really.

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Speaker 2: Unders I love her. I just love going on.

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Speaker 1: This past weekend, my dad did a celebrity boxing match

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Speaker 1: with it Antonio Sobato Junior, who he went through. He

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Speaker 1: went through some stuff in Hollywood and he wanted to

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Speaker 1: do this celebrity boxing match to kind of have a

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Speaker 1: comeback back into the light and the media and kind

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Speaker 1: of do something for himself. So I just feel like

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Speaker 1: everyone deserves a second chance, and there's no room to

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Speaker 1: judge because everyone messes up in their life or or

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Speaker 1: something or something can be twisted or perceived the wrong way.

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Speaker 1: So that's why like everyone deserves a second chance because

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Speaker 1: everyone everyone has a story, and everyone has an opportunity,

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Speaker 1: and everyone should have an opportunity to be able to

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Speaker 1: come back into a light that they.

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Speaker 2: Enjoy and to be able to move on from past

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Speaker 2: perceptions or misconceptions, or to break out of those those

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Speaker 2: those shackles, those things that hold you back, those things

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Speaker 2: that are sitting on your shoulder that every single time

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Speaker 2: just is back on and you're trying to you're trying,

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Speaker 2: you're trying to get it off.

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Speaker 3: That also comes with growth, and I keep saying like

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Speaker 3: growth does not mean age, Like wisdom does not come

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Speaker 3: with age. Wisdom comes with growth. Yeah, wisdom comes with

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Speaker 3: doing the work. Wisdom comes with understanding yourself. Wisdom comes

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Speaker 3: with not looking through not looking through the eyes of

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Speaker 3: other people when looking at yourself.

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Speaker 2: It's so easy to do that, especially in this day

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Speaker 2: and age.

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Speaker 3: It's so easy to do that because we live in

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Speaker 3: a fast food nation right where everything is so fast

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Speaker 3: and it's just happening at all at once, all at once.

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Speaker 2: There's too much I won't say there's too much information,

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Speaker 2: but there's too much.

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Speaker 3: There's too many narratives out there about one thing, and

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Speaker 3: it messes up facts. Yeah, and unfortunately, every single thing

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Speaker 3: somehow gets edited. It doesn't matter whether it is the truth.

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Speaker 3: It doesn't matter whether it is a video, It doesn't

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Speaker 3: matter whether it is whether it's a TV show like,

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Speaker 3: it just gets edited.

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Speaker 2: And which is why you have to know yourself.

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Speaker 3: You have to know who you are and know what

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Speaker 3: your intentions are so that you don't start just digesting

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Speaker 3: all of that stuff and looking at yourself the way

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Speaker 3: that other people may look at you or may not

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Speaker 3: look at you, because usually you usually people will.

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Speaker 2: Have one of two ideas.

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Speaker 3: They'll think that you are the most incredible person, the

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Speaker 3: most perfect person on the face of the planet, like

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Speaker 3: next to the Savior. And then or they will think

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Speaker 3: that you are the worst, most corrupt human being on

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Speaker 3: the face of the planet.

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Speaker 2: And guess what.

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Speaker 3: Both sides are wrong. Yeah, both sides are wrong. So

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Speaker 3: it's about knowing who you are and trying to find

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Speaker 3: that out as early as possible so that you're not

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Speaker 3: stuck in the kind of the cycle that feeds itself

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Speaker 3: of the this craziness.

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Speaker 1: No, for sure, And I felt like, you know, everyone

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Speaker 1: had a story in our coast, and I.

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Speaker 3: Know everybody's story, though, Gia, like, what is everybody's story?

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Speaker 2: Like I did everybody? Like did every single person go

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Speaker 2: into the interrogation room? I'm not sure.

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Speaker 1: I want to say for the most part, Okay, yeah,

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Speaker 1: I want to say. I want to say, for the most.

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Speaker 2: Part here everybody's story. I have not seen the show.

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Speaker 1: Watch it? Are you kidding? I am like ecstatic for

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Speaker 1: the next episode to come out. You gotta watch it,

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Speaker 1: you got it.

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Speaker 2: I definitely won't be watching Stop.

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Speaker 1: What Is Wrong because it's and we're going to dive

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Speaker 1: into this second episode because the viewers need to the

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Speaker 1: viewers need to see that it's funny.

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Speaker 3: The clips are so funny, and I just want to

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Speaker 3: live with that, you know what I mean, Like, I

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Speaker 3: just want to live with the joy and even though

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Speaker 3: it was hard, but I want to live with the

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Speaker 3: fun that we had on that damn show. Like it

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Speaker 3: was so fun being with y'all crazy, crazy people. You

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Speaker 3: know that we all had different stories, We all had

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Speaker 3: different you know, tragedies and traumas and triumphs and all

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Speaker 3: of the tea's that you can think of, you know

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Speaker 3: what I mean, And but we were we were united

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Speaker 3: by our.

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Speaker 2: Similarities.

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Speaker 3: We were united that we had the mission and the

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Speaker 3: same and we were not competing against each other, which

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Speaker 3: is such a cool thing about the show. You know,

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Speaker 3: I will say whatever I want to say about the show,

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Speaker 3: Like if I don't like the edit and I see

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Speaker 3: some stuff and somebody has I'm gonna say about it,

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Speaker 3: like I can't, you know. But at the same time,

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Speaker 3: it doesn't take away the fact that when we were there,

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Speaker 3: we had an amazing time.

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Speaker 2: And so when I see funny things, I'm like, yes, yes,

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Speaker 2: this is the time.

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Speaker 3: That's the experience that I had, you know, of growth

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Speaker 3: and and I had never been of clearer mind.

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Speaker 1: It's so and I mean I also feel like like

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Speaker 1: we were saying, everyone has this story, but we also,

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Speaker 1: I think a lot of us we try to move

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Speaker 1: on from our past and from what's out there. Like

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Speaker 1: I know, my mom says it all the time, like

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Speaker 1: she goes, yes, I went to prison, but that doesn't

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Speaker 1: define me. And you know, and unfortunately, going on shows

343
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Speaker 1: like this or when there's stuff in the media, they

344
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Speaker 1: always want to bring up that bad time in your life. Sure,

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Speaker 1: and that's what, Yes, we understand it, but also as

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Speaker 1: individuals and as human beings, we also want to move

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Speaker 1: on from that. Like being the daughter of obviously Teresa

348
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Speaker 1: and Joe Judice, it comes with a lot of haters

349
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Speaker 1: because people love hate in the middle, like you know,

350
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Speaker 1: but no one will take away the fact that like

351
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Speaker 1: my mother is like she's she's a goat, like she

352
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Speaker 1: no one will take that away from her or as.

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Speaker 3: A mom or exactly or like when you meet that woman,

354
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Speaker 3: how genuinely kind she is, Like she's genuinely kind in

355
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Speaker 3: her eyes. You can just tell it when she hugs you.

356
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Speaker 3: It doesn't feel like she has any ulterior motive. She

357
00:19:52,040 --> 00:19:53,959
Speaker 3: actually looks at you when she talks to you. She

358
00:19:54,040 --> 00:19:57,480
Speaker 3: feels like she really genuinely, like when she asks how

359
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Speaker 3: are you, it doesn't.

360
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Speaker 2: Feel like she's doing like how you doing?

361
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Speaker 3: Yeah, you know what I mean, Like she's genuinely asking, hen,

362
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Speaker 3: how are you doing? Like very much a family person and.

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Speaker 1: So she has such a gentle soul, and like that's

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Speaker 1: what I hope. Like also people take away from her

365
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Speaker 1: own special forces take away from all of us. But

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Speaker 1: you know, even for me, it was it's difficult how

367
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Speaker 1: a lot of my hate comments are really not even

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Speaker 1: about me. They're about my family and the situation that.

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Speaker 3: Really I'm really but I'm sorry that that happens, because

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Speaker 3: I understand that. I get it. I get it, I

371
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Speaker 3: get it, I get it. We're going on a show,

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Speaker 3: right and we're you know, public figures. I hate the

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Speaker 3: term celebrity because it just feels like but but public figures.

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00:20:47,480 --> 00:20:52,800
Speaker 3: And so there's certain things that come with that. But

375
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Speaker 3: it doesn't make it any easier that that is a

376
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Speaker 3: part of that, that's like a part of the the

377
00:21:02,400 --> 00:21:05,679
Speaker 3: the job description, because a part of being a human

378
00:21:05,720 --> 00:21:08,560
Speaker 3: being is supposed to actually be It sounds corny, but

379
00:21:08,560 --> 00:21:10,879
Speaker 3: it's supposed to actually be being kind to one another,

380
00:21:11,440 --> 00:21:14,439
Speaker 3: and so I really do and and listen, you are

381
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Speaker 3: a young woman who has so much life and so

382
00:21:18,880 --> 00:21:21,400
Speaker 3: much just light in you and everything like that.

383
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Speaker 2: I hate that.

384
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Speaker 3: I hate that, you know, I hate that for you

385
00:21:24,800 --> 00:21:27,879
Speaker 3: and genuinely like you don't it's gonna continue. But at

386
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Speaker 3: the same time, you know, I just really, you know,

387
00:21:30,640 --> 00:21:33,880
Speaker 3: for me, like you don't deserve that. Nobody deserves that.

388
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Speaker 3: Some people might deserve that, but you don't deserve that.

389
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Speaker 1: No, I know, and you know, and it's okay, It's

390
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Speaker 1: a part of life. But what specially, like the show

391
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Speaker 1: really did teach me to, you know, face my fears,

392
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Speaker 1: overcome them and kind of just.

393
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Speaker 2: Let go like surrender.

394
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Speaker 1: Sometimes yeah, it's just not worth it. So as much

395
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Speaker 1: as sometimes things could be aggravating and you know, things

396
00:21:59,040 --> 00:22:02,120
Speaker 1: can be misjob and you know that that's not what

397
00:22:02,160 --> 00:22:05,280
Speaker 1: things really are, it kind of just taught me like

398
00:22:05,880 --> 00:22:09,399
Speaker 1: it's okay. But I'm also happy that everyone is shown

399
00:22:09,600 --> 00:22:13,359
Speaker 1: in their own light and really as an individual. But

400
00:22:13,440 --> 00:22:15,840
Speaker 1: I want to get into day two because this day

401
00:22:16,040 --> 00:22:22,320
Speaker 1: was really difficult for you, and I'm difficult and I

402
00:22:22,320 --> 00:22:24,400
Speaker 1: can't believe you didn't watch it. But it's fine. I'm

403
00:22:24,400 --> 00:22:28,760
Speaker 1: just gonna fill you in. So this was the aircraft Day.

404
00:22:29,000 --> 00:22:33,840
Speaker 1: This is when you were in that aircraft day and

405
00:22:33,880 --> 00:22:36,760
Speaker 1: you actually attempted this challenge twice.

406
00:22:37,080 --> 00:22:39,440
Speaker 2: Get out my face gear. You had to say all

407
00:22:39,440 --> 00:22:42,639
Speaker 2: of that. You could have just you could have just

408
00:22:42,800 --> 00:22:49,240
Speaker 2: scared by that. But I mean, we all sorry.

409
00:22:51,400 --> 00:22:55,520
Speaker 3: I was so embarrassed, y'all. And I acknowledge that. I

410
00:22:55,600 --> 00:22:59,399
Speaker 3: accept that. Yo, that's my l that is.

411
00:23:00,320 --> 00:23:04,240
Speaker 1: But you're crazy. You did it. You did it. You

412
00:23:04,320 --> 00:23:06,600
Speaker 1: just for whatever reason, kept going out the wrong exit

413
00:23:06,880 --> 00:23:10,720
Speaker 1: like you had. You had something, we had the airway

414
00:23:10,840 --> 00:23:13,280
Speaker 1: like you. You held your breath for twenty seconds. You

415
00:23:13,320 --> 00:23:16,040
Speaker 1: did everything right, and I think that's what was probably

416
00:23:16,040 --> 00:23:18,480
Speaker 1: so frustrating for you, because the hard part was to

417
00:23:18,520 --> 00:23:20,720
Speaker 1: hold your breath and I was and you did it.

418
00:23:21,080 --> 00:23:24,120
Speaker 2: But I'm gonna be real. I'm gonna be real. It is.

419
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Speaker 3: It is a study in being overconfident in one thing

420
00:23:31,960 --> 00:23:36,560
Speaker 3: can lead you to be destructive in something else. Yeah,

421
00:23:36,600 --> 00:23:39,439
Speaker 3: and to mess up in something else because I was

422
00:23:39,800 --> 00:23:40,960
Speaker 3: confident about holding.

423
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Speaker 2: Isn't like I'm a sin a breath control all? Come now,

424
00:23:47,600 --> 00:23:51,000
Speaker 2: what do you mean, darling? Of course I get to

425
00:23:51,040 --> 00:23:52,840
Speaker 2: do this. I was over there and I don't know

426
00:23:52,880 --> 00:23:54,399
Speaker 2: if they go there. I don't know if they showed this,

427
00:23:54,440 --> 00:23:56,160
Speaker 2: but it's like I'm literally looking at.

428
00:23:56,080 --> 00:24:00,159
Speaker 3: My watch like counting it, and I'm like, yo, even

429
00:24:00,200 --> 00:24:02,960
Speaker 3: do like thirty cent kids, and I could do like

430
00:24:03,080 --> 00:24:06,119
Speaker 3: a mini in and twelve, well, however many I could do?

431
00:24:06,480 --> 00:24:07,959
Speaker 2: Like then we're good. We're good.

432
00:24:08,040 --> 00:24:10,520
Speaker 3: There's no way, like we got this. I was not

433
00:24:10,560 --> 00:24:16,840
Speaker 3: thinking about the door the first time. The second time, geyeah,

434
00:24:16,840 --> 00:24:21,360
Speaker 3: I had a choreogram. I said window, window door, window,

435
00:24:21,400 --> 00:24:25,560
Speaker 3: window door, window, window door, window, window door. So there's

436
00:24:25,560 --> 00:24:27,639
Speaker 3: two windows, then there's a door, Then there's two windows,

437
00:24:27,680 --> 00:24:29,639
Speaker 3: then there's the door that you're supposed to get out of.

438
00:24:30,240 --> 00:24:30,680
Speaker 2: Cool.

439
00:24:30,840 --> 00:24:33,640
Speaker 3: So this time I'm not messing this up. I got this.

440
00:24:34,400 --> 00:24:36,920
Speaker 3: Me and my girl big Ce, like we got this.

441
00:24:40,520 --> 00:24:43,360
Speaker 3: She had it and I didn't have it.

442
00:24:43,440 --> 00:24:46,840
Speaker 1: Okay, And why do you think that the same mistake

443
00:24:46,880 --> 00:24:49,160
Speaker 1: happened over and over again? And you you were rough,

444
00:24:49,320 --> 00:24:52,600
Speaker 1: you were hard on yourself that like that really that.

445
00:24:52,600 --> 00:24:53,720
Speaker 2: Really no why?

446
00:24:53,800 --> 00:24:57,080
Speaker 3: But yeah you want to know why because it wasn't

447
00:24:57,080 --> 00:25:01,240
Speaker 3: so it wasn't about losing. It was about someone else

448
00:25:01,359 --> 00:25:02,639
Speaker 3: losing because of me.

449
00:25:03,240 --> 00:25:03,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, do you.

450
00:25:03,960 --> 00:25:07,880
Speaker 3: Understand it was not about them doing so well, and

451
00:25:07,960 --> 00:25:14,000
Speaker 3: they were the ones that were scared, like what yeah, no, no, no,

452
00:25:14,240 --> 00:25:15,760
Speaker 3: I got this, I'm here for you.

453
00:25:17,440 --> 00:25:22,080
Speaker 2: I'm good. I know. Such a humbling experience, and that.

454
00:25:22,200 --> 00:25:24,480
Speaker 1: Was rough when we had to do things together as

455
00:25:24,520 --> 00:25:27,160
Speaker 1: pairs because you didn't want to let your partner down.

456
00:25:27,240 --> 00:25:29,359
Speaker 3: You didn't want to let your partner down. You just

457
00:25:29,440 --> 00:25:33,240
Speaker 3: didn't and you could see how proud. Oh it broke

458
00:25:33,320 --> 00:25:36,760
Speaker 3: my heart when Eva was so proud that she did

459
00:25:36,800 --> 00:25:41,720
Speaker 3: it but she lost I know, and I'm just like, oh.

460
00:25:41,480 --> 00:25:44,920
Speaker 1: And how was that for you? Because you, I mean,

461
00:25:45,000 --> 00:25:48,199
Speaker 1: my mom and I went after you guys. So obviously

462
00:25:48,320 --> 00:25:51,959
Speaker 1: for us watching that happen to you guys, that was

463
00:25:52,000 --> 00:25:54,280
Speaker 1: not easy for us to watch and then go up

464
00:25:54,400 --> 00:25:57,400
Speaker 1: and do it. But for you, you did it again

465
00:25:57,720 --> 00:26:00,760
Speaker 1: after watching Eva literally almost die.

466
00:26:00,960 --> 00:26:03,760
Speaker 2: But check this out. That's a complicated situations, right, because.

467
00:26:03,880 --> 00:26:06,200
Speaker 1: I would have been like, I'm never going back and though.

468
00:26:06,720 --> 00:26:08,919
Speaker 3: This is a complicated situation, and this is what I

469
00:26:09,000 --> 00:26:15,000
Speaker 3: don't know if they caught on camera when when Foxy

470
00:26:15,240 --> 00:26:24,879
Speaker 3: was like that, Christy didn't have she didn't have a

471
00:26:24,880 --> 00:26:25,520
Speaker 3: a partner.

472
00:26:25,760 --> 00:26:27,439
Speaker 1: Yeah, she didn't have she was going to go in

473
00:26:27,480 --> 00:26:28,440
Speaker 1: there alone.

474
00:26:29,560 --> 00:26:32,800
Speaker 3: And I think something happened that I had told Chanelle

475
00:26:32,880 --> 00:26:35,359
Speaker 3: because Chanelle felt bad and she wanted to go again.

476
00:26:35,400 --> 00:26:37,639
Speaker 3: And it was like, oh, well, something I don't remember.

477
00:26:37,680 --> 00:26:39,440
Speaker 3: I don't remember exactly how it happened.

478
00:26:39,440 --> 00:26:39,600
Speaker 2: But.

479
00:26:42,600 --> 00:26:46,640
Speaker 3: Nobody was raising their hand. I think maybe Robby did,

480
00:26:46,640 --> 00:26:50,560
Speaker 3: I'm not sure. But then Foxy looks over at me.

481
00:26:51,359 --> 00:26:54,680
Speaker 3: I had not raised my hand yet. I had not

482
00:26:55,040 --> 00:26:57,720
Speaker 3: raised my hand yet. He looked at me, and he

483
00:26:57,880 --> 00:27:00,840
Speaker 3: looked at me like and I felt the pressure. He

484
00:27:00,920 --> 00:27:03,560
Speaker 3: said nothing he gave. He did not tell me to

485
00:27:03,560 --> 00:27:07,399
Speaker 3: do that, but he looked at me, and I was like,

486
00:27:08,040 --> 00:27:10,640
Speaker 3: am I supposed to? Is he gonna call?

487
00:27:11,720 --> 00:27:17,679
Speaker 2: So I slightly? I mean like this like that, and

488
00:27:17,760 --> 00:27:23,240
Speaker 2: he's like sixty and I'm like damn yeah.

489
00:27:23,640 --> 00:27:25,800
Speaker 3: And after we were done, she told me, She's like,

490
00:27:26,280 --> 00:27:30,560
Speaker 3: you help me conquer my fear. But I'm so sorry,

491
00:27:30,640 --> 00:27:32,960
Speaker 3: says I didn't help you win, I helped you lose,

492
00:27:33,640 --> 00:27:36,360
Speaker 3: and but all jokes aside, like I felt really bad

493
00:27:36,400 --> 00:27:39,199
Speaker 3: about that. I felt really really bad. I do not

494
00:27:39,400 --> 00:27:45,480
Speaker 3: take losing art, but I do take I do take

495
00:27:46,520 --> 00:27:50,639
Speaker 3: making someone lose hard. You see what I mean, Like,

496
00:27:51,040 --> 00:27:54,000
Speaker 3: if I've done the best that I can and you know,

497
00:27:54,280 --> 00:27:55,920
Speaker 3: but that was not the best that I.

498
00:27:55,880 --> 00:27:58,879
Speaker 2: Could and I just couldn't open my eyes under that water.

499
00:27:59,480 --> 00:28:01,480
Speaker 2: I just couldn't it. It was disgusting.

500
00:28:01,960 --> 00:28:05,640
Speaker 3: So I really thought I can make this work and

501
00:28:05,680 --> 00:28:07,439
Speaker 3: not opened my eyes because I'm thinking of myself.

502
00:28:07,440 --> 00:28:09,440
Speaker 2: But if this was a real situation, we have goggles.

503
00:28:09,440 --> 00:28:14,879
Speaker 1: No, No, we were in a plane crash.

504
00:28:15,160 --> 00:28:17,800
Speaker 3: But if you're in a plane and you're in the

505
00:28:18,040 --> 00:28:20,879
Speaker 3: you're in the military, whatn' you have on goggles if

506
00:28:20,880 --> 00:28:26,440
Speaker 3: you're in the plane? Think about that. I don't know,

507
00:28:26,680 --> 00:28:30,720
Speaker 3: so somebody answered in the comments, Yeah, but I don't.

508
00:28:30,840 --> 00:28:34,440
Speaker 1: I don't know, but it was. The scenario was that

509
00:28:34,600 --> 00:28:38,760
Speaker 1: we got into a plane crash and the plane literally

510
00:28:39,000 --> 00:28:42,080
Speaker 1: chopped in half and we were sinking, Like I feel.

511
00:28:42,120 --> 00:28:44,800
Speaker 3: The thing is is that if I got out, if

512
00:28:44,840 --> 00:28:46,560
Speaker 3: I got out, then that means that I'm out.

513
00:28:47,280 --> 00:28:51,280
Speaker 1: So why it was the door thing was a little

514
00:28:51,440 --> 00:28:52,520
Speaker 1: it was a little.

515
00:28:52,760 --> 00:28:56,200
Speaker 3: Unnecessary made it and then Eva passed out and I

516
00:28:56,240 --> 00:28:57,719
Speaker 3: started to go to her, and then they were like,

517
00:28:57,840 --> 00:29:01,000
Speaker 3: oh and they went to they bolted to.

518
00:29:00,960 --> 00:29:04,720
Speaker 1: Her, you know, So I mean, and it was crazy

519
00:29:04,760 --> 00:29:08,680
Speaker 1: because we learned this when we were at press in

520
00:29:08,880 --> 00:29:12,880
Speaker 1: LA that she was really out like she was.

521
00:29:12,800 --> 00:29:15,880
Speaker 2: Out pressed, had passed out, and thank.

522
00:29:15,720 --> 00:29:19,120
Speaker 1: God that Rudy saw her hair in that water, because

523
00:29:19,160 --> 00:29:20,400
Speaker 1: things could have been really bad.

524
00:29:21,360 --> 00:29:26,640
Speaker 2: She literally went under. Yeah, that was real. That was real.

525
00:29:27,400 --> 00:29:28,400
Speaker 2: So like the.

526
00:29:28,360 --> 00:29:32,200
Speaker 1: Show, they the ds thought that the show was about

527
00:29:32,240 --> 00:29:35,120
Speaker 1: to end right then and there in that moment, and

528
00:29:35,160 --> 00:29:37,600
Speaker 1: that we weren't going to continue because.

529
00:29:42,440 --> 00:29:46,360
Speaker 2: Everything would have been fine.

530
00:29:47,440 --> 00:29:50,440
Speaker 1: But yeah, like, where did you see them like resuscitate her.

531
00:29:51,200 --> 00:29:53,640
Speaker 2: I don't know if it was like resuscitation. I don't know.

532
00:29:55,920 --> 00:29:57,160
Speaker 1: Was it like CPR.

533
00:29:58,440 --> 00:29:59,959
Speaker 2: No, they didn't give her like mouth to mouth.

534
00:30:00,440 --> 00:30:03,600
Speaker 3: They pulled her and I'm not sure I know that

535
00:30:03,640 --> 00:30:06,160
Speaker 3: they pulled her in because I was watching. I was

536
00:30:06,200 --> 00:30:08,960
Speaker 3: watching hanging on the boat as they were pulling her

537
00:30:09,000 --> 00:30:13,920
Speaker 3: in and then but her body was limp and then

538
00:30:15,080 --> 00:30:16,800
Speaker 3: what happened, I don't remember.

539
00:30:19,200 --> 00:30:22,440
Speaker 1: You probably blocked out, I mean it was it was terrified.

540
00:30:22,480 --> 00:30:26,200
Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't remember a lot of the actual moments

541
00:30:26,200 --> 00:30:28,520
Speaker 3: of being inside.

542
00:30:27,960 --> 00:30:29,440
Speaker 2: Of the challenge.

543
00:30:29,320 --> 00:30:33,280
Speaker 3: Yeah, you know, the only thing that I really remember

544
00:30:33,520 --> 00:30:37,520
Speaker 3: is right, is the feeling right before jumping out of

545
00:30:37,520 --> 00:30:41,680
Speaker 3: the plane and the feeling right before going underneath that

546
00:30:41,760 --> 00:30:44,520
Speaker 3: water because I kind of the first time I kind.

547
00:30:44,320 --> 00:30:46,880
Speaker 2: Of swallowed a gulp of water by.

548
00:30:46,800 --> 00:30:48,720
Speaker 3: Accident, and I don't know if they got that on camera,

549
00:30:48,800 --> 00:30:50,719
Speaker 3: but it's like I kind of swallowed a gulp of

550
00:30:50,800 --> 00:30:55,680
Speaker 3: water and that made me freak out, So that already

551
00:30:55,760 --> 00:30:58,800
Speaker 3: had my mind like, wait, what's happening. But yeah, needless

552
00:30:58,800 --> 00:31:04,160
Speaker 3: to say that that definitely was the toughest day for me,

553
00:31:04,760 --> 00:31:08,920
Speaker 3: Tougher than tougher than the other day days that are coming.

554
00:31:09,760 --> 00:31:10,280
Speaker 2: Yeah.

555
00:31:10,680 --> 00:31:14,800
Speaker 1: So and then following that, we had the fight. The

556
00:31:14,840 --> 00:31:17,360
Speaker 1: fighting that day.

557
00:31:18,400 --> 00:31:19,560
Speaker 2: Yeah, that pissed me off.

558
00:31:20,920 --> 00:31:23,600
Speaker 3: That made me mad because I felt like, why did

559
00:31:23,720 --> 00:31:24,920
Speaker 3: y'all stop us so soon?

560
00:31:25,680 --> 00:31:29,120
Speaker 2: You know, like Robbie wanted to fight. I wanted to fight,

561
00:31:29,680 --> 00:31:30,280
Speaker 2: and I.

562
00:31:30,160 --> 00:31:32,160
Speaker 1: Feel like, but at least you guys were still allowed

563
00:31:32,200 --> 00:31:35,080
Speaker 1: to fight. Jesse Decker because of her carporal tunnel and

564
00:31:35,120 --> 00:31:38,800
Speaker 1: her wrist, she was pissed that she couldn't fight, but.

565
00:31:39,160 --> 00:31:41,200
Speaker 3: They stopped us so soon, and I'm like, y'all made

566
00:31:41,280 --> 00:31:42,520
Speaker 3: us look like little woosses.

567
00:31:43,040 --> 00:31:43,560
Speaker 1: Yeah.

568
00:31:43,960 --> 00:31:46,360
Speaker 3: I don't know how it's gonna be edited together again,

569
00:31:46,480 --> 00:31:48,680
Speaker 3: but it's.

570
00:31:50,680 --> 00:31:52,080
Speaker 2: It's a great show, you guys.

571
00:31:52,480 --> 00:31:55,719
Speaker 1: Yeah, Well that was that was h you know, probably

572
00:31:55,720 --> 00:31:59,240
Speaker 1: the worst day ever for me mentally.

573
00:31:59,200 --> 00:32:02,400
Speaker 2: Because you had to do your that was.

574
00:32:02,400 --> 00:32:04,640
Speaker 1: The this was the day my mom left.

575
00:32:05,360 --> 00:32:07,200
Speaker 2: Oh shoot, that's right.

576
00:32:07,800 --> 00:32:10,880
Speaker 1: And it was so tough for you out of nowhere,

577
00:32:11,560 --> 00:32:15,280
Speaker 1: Like it was nuts. We were in the cars. We

578
00:32:15,280 --> 00:32:17,600
Speaker 1: were in the cars on our way to go fight,

579
00:32:17,880 --> 00:32:20,320
Speaker 1: and you know, when we were stacked in those cars,

580
00:32:20,360 --> 00:32:22,480
Speaker 1: there was at least three or four of us in

581
00:32:22,520 --> 00:32:26,760
Speaker 1: each vehicle this specific challenge, it was just me and

582
00:32:26,800 --> 00:32:29,720
Speaker 1: my mom in this car. I don't know how that happened.

583
00:32:29,840 --> 00:32:33,280
Speaker 1: I don't know how in what way. I was like, okay, whatever,

584
00:32:33,840 --> 00:32:37,240
Speaker 1: but it's me and my mom and she's like just

585
00:32:37,320 --> 00:32:40,360
Speaker 1: talking about normal things that we had talked about this

586
00:32:40,600 --> 00:32:43,600
Speaker 1: entire time. She was like all right, you know Gea,

587
00:32:43,680 --> 00:32:45,640
Speaker 1: like whenever I decide to go home, like do you

588
00:32:45,680 --> 00:32:47,680
Speaker 1: want me to wait for you here in Morocco? Or

589
00:32:47,720 --> 00:32:49,720
Speaker 1: like do you want me to just head back? And

590
00:32:49,800 --> 00:32:51,640
Speaker 1: I was like, ma, what are you gonna do here?

591
00:32:52,080 --> 00:32:55,480
Speaker 1: Just go home, don't stay here, like no worries, Like

592
00:32:55,600 --> 00:32:58,840
Speaker 1: I love you, like whatever you decide. But she wasn't.

593
00:32:59,040 --> 00:33:01,440
Speaker 1: She didn't tell me that she was gonna do it

594
00:33:01,920 --> 00:33:04,760
Speaker 1: right then and there. Like I was like, okay, we're

595
00:33:04,800 --> 00:33:07,960
Speaker 1: just having conversation, Like she's just like asking at whatever

596
00:33:08,000 --> 00:33:09,680
Speaker 1: point in time if she choose me, were you.

597
00:33:09,640 --> 00:33:13,280
Speaker 3: On your way to the boxing things? So she probably

598
00:33:13,320 --> 00:33:15,120
Speaker 3: already knew that that was going to be too difficult

599
00:33:15,160 --> 00:33:17,320
Speaker 3: for her to see you doing. And then she waited

600
00:33:17,440 --> 00:33:19,880
Speaker 3: and she saw other people do it, and she knew

601
00:33:19,960 --> 00:33:21,440
Speaker 3: at that moment, nah, I can't do this.

602
00:33:22,040 --> 00:33:25,000
Speaker 1: Yes, So she probably had this in her head. Yeah,

603
00:33:25,160 --> 00:33:27,760
Speaker 1: she didn't want to tell me like, okay, I'm gonna leave,

604
00:33:28,200 --> 00:33:31,680
Speaker 1: right And so then when we got there, And also

605
00:33:32,080 --> 00:33:35,200
Speaker 1: again something that I kept telling my mom throughout the course.

606
00:33:35,360 --> 00:33:38,280
Speaker 1: And I don't know if this is something that is

607
00:33:38,320 --> 00:33:41,600
Speaker 1: going to be perceived the right way, but throughout the course,

608
00:33:41,640 --> 00:33:43,880
Speaker 1: I kept telling her, these are things that you're never

609
00:33:43,960 --> 00:33:46,920
Speaker 1: going to do in your life. These are also things

610
00:33:46,960 --> 00:33:50,120
Speaker 1: that are once in a lifetime. But this course is

611
00:33:50,160 --> 00:33:53,440
Speaker 1: made to break you. So take this opportunity to just

612
00:33:53,600 --> 00:33:57,560
Speaker 1: let things go. Let go of your anger, just let

613
00:33:57,680 --> 00:34:00,560
Speaker 1: go of the past and just live in the present.

614
00:34:01,200 --> 00:34:04,600
Speaker 1: Like just stop being angry, don't be angry about the

615
00:34:04,640 --> 00:34:09,080
Speaker 1: past anymore. Just move on. And because she's you know

616
00:34:09,160 --> 00:34:13,279
Speaker 1: she's she does she holds resentment on what happened with

617
00:34:13,400 --> 00:34:16,319
Speaker 1: our legal situation, and I get it. I hold that

618
00:34:16,400 --> 00:34:19,000
Speaker 1: resentment and that's totally okay, and.

619
00:34:18,960 --> 00:34:21,759
Speaker 3: I spoke to you enough to let you know that

620
00:34:21,920 --> 00:34:24,239
Speaker 3: I hold resentment as well.

621
00:34:24,320 --> 00:34:26,719
Speaker 2: But at the same time, it's difficult.

622
00:34:26,880 --> 00:34:30,879
Speaker 3: I think that letting it go happens after you're done

623
00:34:30,880 --> 00:34:31,319
Speaker 3: with the show.

624
00:34:31,719 --> 00:34:32,919
Speaker 2: Yeah you know what I mean.

625
00:34:33,080 --> 00:34:36,440
Speaker 3: I think because everything about the show is meant to

626
00:34:36,520 --> 00:34:43,280
Speaker 3: be in your face about your public stuff.

627
00:34:43,760 --> 00:34:44,400
Speaker 2: Yeah you know.

628
00:34:44,640 --> 00:34:48,400
Speaker 3: It's not so much about like who are you in

629
00:34:48,440 --> 00:34:52,000
Speaker 3: your deep, deep core as you're in your soul. It's

630
00:34:52,000 --> 00:34:55,360
Speaker 3: really about this is what the public perceives you as,

631
00:34:56,520 --> 00:34:58,879
Speaker 3: and here's your chance to work that off.

632
00:34:59,239 --> 00:35:03,520
Speaker 1: Yep. So then when she got asked to go fight,

633
00:35:04,760 --> 00:35:08,160
Speaker 1: that's when she looked at me and she goes, you're

634
00:35:08,200 --> 00:35:11,520
Speaker 1: telling me to let go of anger. How can I

635
00:35:11,680 --> 00:35:15,680
Speaker 1: sit here and show you that violence and fighting is okay?

636
00:35:18,440 --> 00:35:23,000
Speaker 1: And that's when that's when she walked off, and I

637
00:35:23,239 --> 00:35:27,920
Speaker 1: was like, what just happened. I had no idea that

638
00:35:27,960 --> 00:35:29,520
Speaker 1: it was going that she was going to do that.

639
00:35:29,680 --> 00:35:31,960
Speaker 1: I had no idea that that was going to happen.

640
00:35:32,480 --> 00:35:36,160
Speaker 1: So now I'm bawling. I'm like, what is going on?

641
00:35:37,120 --> 00:35:41,520
Speaker 1: And then they go eighteen, you're fighting Christy because that's

642
00:35:41,560 --> 00:35:44,239
Speaker 1: who my mom was supposed to fight. And I was like,

643
00:35:45,200 --> 00:35:48,359
Speaker 1: I'm gonna she's gonna beat it out of me right now,

644
00:35:48,400 --> 00:35:50,440
Speaker 1: like this is gonna be horrible.

645
00:35:50,680 --> 00:35:54,120
Speaker 3: Like I was like, this is what I'm telling you, though, girl,

646
00:35:54,480 --> 00:35:59,120
Speaker 3: you are Laura Croft like you are a beast.

647
00:36:00,160 --> 00:36:03,360
Speaker 1: But I was that was the challenge where even Rubbie

648
00:36:03,400 --> 00:36:06,480
Speaker 1: said it, Rubbie goes Gia. You would cry and do

649
00:36:06,520 --> 00:36:07,959
Speaker 1: the challenges at the same time.

650
00:36:08,360 --> 00:36:13,160
Speaker 3: Absolutely, that was the challenge.

651
00:36:13,400 --> 00:36:16,640
Speaker 1: I'm a capricorn, okay, I thought she was a Gemini.

652
00:36:17,080 --> 00:36:18,440
Speaker 1: Oh my dad's a Gemini.

653
00:36:20,239 --> 00:36:24,839
Speaker 3: I'm like, be somebody's butt and then but you could

654
00:36:24,880 --> 00:36:25,640
Speaker 3: cry about it too.

655
00:36:26,040 --> 00:36:29,880
Speaker 1: Yeah, no, my dad's a Gemini, full full through gemini.

656
00:36:30,040 --> 00:36:33,680
Speaker 1: But yeah no, but that was that was rough for

657
00:36:33,800 --> 00:36:35,719
Speaker 1: me too. That day screwed me up.

658
00:36:36,040 --> 00:36:36,239
Speaker 2: Yeah.

659
00:36:36,360 --> 00:36:39,239
Speaker 1: I feel like that day was really tough on you know,

660
00:36:39,800 --> 00:36:43,160
Speaker 1: you meet you Eva like we went. We went through

661
00:36:43,200 --> 00:36:43,960
Speaker 1: it that day.

662
00:36:44,280 --> 00:36:49,200
Speaker 3: He did You and I have have the interrogation room

663
00:36:49,280 --> 00:36:50,640
Speaker 3: on the same day.

664
00:36:51,960 --> 00:36:55,319
Speaker 1: They pulled me in twice, but they did pull me

665
00:36:55,440 --> 00:36:58,839
Speaker 1: in when my mom left, So that was day two.

666
00:36:59,200 --> 00:37:00,520
Speaker 1: I think they did pulled me in.

667
00:37:00,600 --> 00:37:02,560
Speaker 2: You in day to day.

668
00:37:04,239 --> 00:37:08,160
Speaker 1: Yep, they did, and you know you definitely you definitely

669
00:37:08,160 --> 00:37:10,960
Speaker 1: had some emotions towards it too, and I did too,

670
00:37:10,960 --> 00:37:12,680
Speaker 1: because I mean I just went in there and I

671
00:37:12,760 --> 00:37:15,200
Speaker 1: was just bawling. I was like, I want my mom back,

672
00:37:15,640 --> 00:37:16,719
Speaker 1: Just give me my mom back.

673
00:37:19,320 --> 00:37:21,440
Speaker 2: So sad it was.

674
00:37:21,760 --> 00:37:23,799
Speaker 3: It just it's so funny because it I mean, it's

675
00:37:23,840 --> 00:37:26,839
Speaker 3: not funny, but it's it's strange that it feels so

676
00:37:27,680 --> 00:37:30,839
Speaker 3: traumatic and it's such a short period of time and

677
00:37:30,880 --> 00:37:34,600
Speaker 3: it's not and it's done for entertainment.

678
00:37:34,719 --> 00:37:37,640
Speaker 2: That's what's so weird. It's like, that's what that's that

679
00:37:37,760 --> 00:37:38,840
Speaker 2: to me is.

680
00:37:39,239 --> 00:37:45,960
Speaker 3: The most fascinating thing about unscripted is the fact that

681
00:37:48,080 --> 00:37:57,680
Speaker 3: in this small amount of time, people are expected to

682
00:37:57,719 --> 00:38:04,719
Speaker 3: be vulnerable, work it out, and heal all in that

683
00:38:04,760 --> 00:38:07,520
Speaker 3: amount of time and it's just unscripted.

684
00:38:07,920 --> 00:38:11,440
Speaker 1: Like the main I think the main takeaway is like

685
00:38:11,680 --> 00:38:25,520
Speaker 1: conflict resolution. Like it's just that, that's it. You have

686
00:38:25,560 --> 00:38:30,600
Speaker 1: like such an impressive background. You know, you're an actor, director, songwriter, producer, singer,

687
00:38:31,080 --> 00:38:34,879
Speaker 1: Like you have such an artistic mind, Like did any

688
00:38:34,920 --> 00:38:39,440
Speaker 1: of those skills translate into special forces? Like did your

689
00:38:39,560 --> 00:38:44,040
Speaker 1: creative mindset help you through these challenges? Or was it hard?

690
00:38:44,760 --> 00:38:45,000
Speaker 2: Yeah?

691
00:38:45,120 --> 00:38:48,200
Speaker 3: No, it was definitely hard because I had just never

692
00:38:48,280 --> 00:38:51,719
Speaker 3: experienced anything like this before, and to me, this wasn't

693
00:38:51,840 --> 00:38:53,879
Speaker 3: I had to step back and kind of look at

694
00:38:53,880 --> 00:38:58,840
Speaker 3: it as art, if you will, so that I could

695
00:38:58,920 --> 00:39:02,520
Speaker 3: fully dive into it, because if I didn't, then because

696
00:39:02,560 --> 00:39:03,719
Speaker 3: I love.

697
00:39:03,560 --> 00:39:08,160
Speaker 2: Reality TV, bro, like I love reality TV, and.

698
00:39:12,200 --> 00:39:16,120
Speaker 3: But things that you loved, you don't necessarily want that

699
00:39:16,160 --> 00:39:22,320
Speaker 3: turned on you. You know, it's very you really do forget

700
00:39:22,680 --> 00:39:23,800
Speaker 3: that the cameras.

701
00:39:23,400 --> 00:39:30,640
Speaker 4: Are there, and we really did because they had spots everywhere,

702
00:39:30,800 --> 00:39:34,720
Speaker 4: like every corner, but we really didn't have cameramen unless

703
00:39:34,719 --> 00:39:35,840
Speaker 4: we were in the challenges.

704
00:39:35,920 --> 00:39:38,839
Speaker 1: But on base they were everywhere, and.

705
00:39:38,760 --> 00:39:40,200
Speaker 2: Those cameras were amazing.

706
00:39:40,320 --> 00:39:43,120
Speaker 3: I saw the clip when I walked out of the

707
00:39:44,320 --> 00:39:49,279
Speaker 3: barracks and I'm talking to Eva and it's like I'm

708
00:39:49,280 --> 00:39:52,800
Speaker 3: talking about what happened with Cody. Those cameras are far,

709
00:39:53,239 --> 00:39:57,439
Speaker 3: but it is so clear. It is so and I

710
00:39:57,480 --> 00:39:59,719
Speaker 3: did not think I didn't think that.

711
00:40:00,440 --> 00:40:01,040
Speaker 2: I don't know why.

712
00:40:01,120 --> 00:40:03,560
Speaker 1: I didn't think that they could really hear that.

713
00:40:04,120 --> 00:40:07,400
Speaker 3: I knew that they could hear things, but I thought somehow,

714
00:40:07,480 --> 00:40:13,600
Speaker 3: like if I talk low, they can't really you know,

715
00:40:13,640 --> 00:40:16,399
Speaker 3: they're not going to use this. I really thought there

716
00:40:16,440 --> 00:40:17,920
Speaker 3: was a lot of There were a lot of times

717
00:40:17,920 --> 00:40:19,480
Speaker 3: when I was like, oh, well, they're not going to

718
00:40:19,560 --> 00:40:22,520
Speaker 3: use this because it's like why, it's just it's just

719
00:40:22,640 --> 00:40:25,000
Speaker 3: us talking like whatever, I gotta say this right now,

720
00:40:25,120 --> 00:40:27,080
Speaker 3: you know, things like that, and they're like, yep, that's

721
00:40:27,120 --> 00:40:27,920
Speaker 3: the thing they use.

722
00:40:28,320 --> 00:40:30,680
Speaker 1: Yeah, because it was so real. It was so in

723
00:40:30,760 --> 00:40:35,640
Speaker 1: the moment, but it was in the moment, like storytelling

724
00:40:35,719 --> 00:40:37,560
Speaker 1: is such a big part of what you do, Like

725
00:40:37,600 --> 00:40:40,399
Speaker 1: did you find yourself kind of looking at this experience

726
00:40:40,400 --> 00:40:42,760
Speaker 1: as part of your own story.

727
00:40:43,000 --> 00:40:45,080
Speaker 3: Not a part of my own story, but just well,

728
00:40:45,239 --> 00:40:48,960
Speaker 3: here's the thing to be completely real. When I first

729
00:40:49,000 --> 00:40:52,480
Speaker 3: walked into it, I walked into it as a gig,

730
00:40:54,400 --> 00:40:57,279
Speaker 3: you know what I mean, like, let's let's keep it real.

731
00:40:57,360 --> 00:41:01,200
Speaker 3: I walked into it as it's a gig. And so

732
00:41:01,400 --> 00:41:02,960
Speaker 3: here we go, and it's.

733
00:41:02,840 --> 00:41:06,719
Speaker 1: I mean initially, yes, like we all like we all

734
00:41:06,760 --> 00:41:10,560
Speaker 1: walked in. Okay, we're getting we're being paid. This is

735
00:41:10,600 --> 00:41:10,960
Speaker 1: a job.

736
00:41:11,239 --> 00:41:11,880
Speaker 2: It's a job.

737
00:41:12,000 --> 00:41:13,880
Speaker 3: It's a job, and so I'm going to bust my

738
00:41:14,040 --> 00:41:17,160
Speaker 3: hand and I'm gonna, you know, do the very best

739
00:41:17,200 --> 00:41:20,640
Speaker 3: that I can do, because that's what the job is.

740
00:41:20,680 --> 00:41:25,759
Speaker 2: The job is to kick You don't want to go there.

741
00:41:25,880 --> 00:41:29,240
Speaker 3: It certainly didn't want to go there and and fail.

742
00:41:29,360 --> 00:41:31,160
Speaker 2: I didn't want to go there and.

743
00:41:32,520 --> 00:41:34,560
Speaker 1: Be one of the first ones out, you know what.

744
00:41:34,560 --> 00:41:37,600
Speaker 3: I mean, Like you want to it becomes a pride

745
00:41:38,880 --> 00:41:41,839
Speaker 3: anybody that is you know, had to go. But none

746
00:41:41,920 --> 00:41:44,279
Speaker 3: of us wanted to. I don't think any of us

747
00:41:44,400 --> 00:41:48,200
Speaker 3: went in with the intention of, oh, we're going to

748
00:41:48,239 --> 00:41:49,600
Speaker 3: be here for a little bit of time and then

749
00:41:49,600 --> 00:41:51,759
Speaker 3: we're gonna bounce, like no, because what would be the

750
00:41:51,800 --> 00:41:53,280
Speaker 3: sense of even doing it.

751
00:41:53,160 --> 00:41:56,239
Speaker 1: Because then it really does become a pride thing. You're

752
00:41:56,360 --> 00:41:57,719
Speaker 1: doing it for yourself.

753
00:41:57,800 --> 00:42:00,000
Speaker 2: Oh my god, absolutely absolute.

754
00:42:00,880 --> 00:42:03,040
Speaker 3: And now I think that there's a difference between it

755
00:42:03,120 --> 00:42:05,960
Speaker 3: being a pride thing and an ego thing, and I

756
00:42:06,000 --> 00:42:12,319
Speaker 3: think that ego gets in the way sometimes. For me,

757
00:42:12,640 --> 00:42:20,920
Speaker 3: it was it was difficult talking to two men about

758
00:42:21,120 --> 00:42:27,480
Speaker 3: such personal things and and then them kind of acting

759
00:42:27,520 --> 00:42:29,560
Speaker 3: like they didn't know, and you know that they're bull

760
00:42:30,160 --> 00:42:33,560
Speaker 3: crapping you, because yes, you do. You mean, you had

761
00:42:33,600 --> 00:42:37,439
Speaker 3: a whole portfolio on us, you know what I mean.

762
00:42:37,560 --> 00:42:42,440
Speaker 1: And but even on previous seasons come they show them

763
00:42:42,480 --> 00:42:47,120
Speaker 1: googling stuff and oh maybe initially they didn't actually know

764
00:42:47,160 --> 00:42:49,360
Speaker 1: who we were, because I mean, they don't seem like

765
00:42:49,400 --> 00:42:51,440
Speaker 1: the type I believe that they don't seem like the

766
00:42:51,480 --> 00:42:53,160
Speaker 1: type of guys to like, I don't know, maybe watch

767
00:42:53,160 --> 00:42:56,239
Speaker 1: reality TV. Maybe maybe the NFL players they knew who knows,

768
00:42:56,280 --> 00:43:01,359
Speaker 1: who knows, But I they did show in past seasons

769
00:43:01,400 --> 00:43:04,759
Speaker 1: that they they know your background, they look you up.

770
00:43:04,920 --> 00:43:07,359
Speaker 3: Yeah, and also like we had done, we had done

771
00:43:07,400 --> 00:43:12,200
Speaker 3: the the interview prior to starting the actual show, so

772
00:43:12,320 --> 00:43:17,320
Speaker 3: we also knew what they what those producers had asked us.

773
00:43:17,680 --> 00:43:19,759
Speaker 3: So yeah, we knew. Here's the thing. I didn't go

774
00:43:19,880 --> 00:43:22,920
Speaker 3: into it blindly. I knew what to expect, But that

775
00:43:22,960 --> 00:43:26,240
Speaker 3: doesn't mean that once I was there with what I expected,

776
00:43:26,320 --> 00:43:30,080
Speaker 3: it wasn't still difficult. That's really all it is. So

777
00:43:31,239 --> 00:43:34,440
Speaker 3: I don't regret doing it. Never do it again, But

778
00:43:35,280 --> 00:43:38,759
Speaker 3: I don't regret doing it. It was still a wonderful experience,

779
00:43:39,320 --> 00:43:44,800
Speaker 3: and it was also difficult, and the airing of it

780
00:43:44,840 --> 00:43:49,840
Speaker 3: is has been really fun to promote and see y'all

781
00:43:49,880 --> 00:43:54,680
Speaker 3: and everything like that, and you know, but yeah, I'm

782
00:43:54,680 --> 00:43:57,439
Speaker 3: also I'm also I'm also deep in promoting the album.

783
00:43:57,560 --> 00:43:58,319
Speaker 2: So it's kind of like it.

784
00:44:00,200 --> 00:44:01,719
Speaker 1: Inspire you in any way?

785
00:44:02,320 --> 00:44:04,040
Speaker 2: Did this inspire my music?

786
00:44:04,520 --> 00:44:04,920
Speaker 1: Yeah?

787
00:44:05,160 --> 00:44:07,960
Speaker 2: No, No, the album was because.

788
00:44:07,840 --> 00:44:10,160
Speaker 3: Only because the album was done the album was done

789
00:44:10,280 --> 00:44:14,560
Speaker 3: before we had already we had always set to do

790
00:44:14,640 --> 00:44:18,359
Speaker 3: it in uh in September. We wanted to do it

791
00:44:18,480 --> 00:44:21,719
Speaker 3: like right at fall, so it was perfect that like

792
00:44:21,760 --> 00:44:25,799
Speaker 3: Special Forces came out on FID and the album came

793
00:44:25,800 --> 00:44:26,920
Speaker 3: out on the thirtieth.

794
00:44:27,000 --> 00:44:31,040
Speaker 1: So I mean, I just feel like, you know, that

795
00:44:31,200 --> 00:44:33,920
Speaker 1: public experience that you went through, it was so extremely

796
00:44:33,960 --> 00:44:36,759
Speaker 1: difficult for you, and I could just I could just

797
00:44:36,840 --> 00:44:39,960
Speaker 1: tell when I met you at on Special Forces and

798
00:44:40,080 --> 00:44:43,040
Speaker 1: just talking to you, and I tell everyone, I go,

799
00:44:43,280 --> 00:44:48,120
Speaker 1: I love him, I go, I love He's just he's awesome.

800
00:44:48,600 --> 00:44:52,400
Speaker 1: And you you really felt that genuine connection between you,

801
00:44:52,440 --> 00:44:54,759
Speaker 1: know you, and like you said, like just when you're

802
00:44:54,800 --> 00:44:57,680
Speaker 1: talking to you, you feel you feel the emotion, like

803
00:44:57,719 --> 00:45:01,400
Speaker 1: you feel like the realness in you share that I know,

804
00:45:01,560 --> 00:45:06,520
Speaker 1: like so serious and but like that experience, how has

805
00:45:06,560 --> 00:45:09,320
Speaker 1: that shaped you and the way that you see yourself today?

806
00:45:09,440 --> 00:45:13,160
Speaker 1: Because after listening to your album, I just felt like

807
00:45:14,120 --> 00:45:18,000
Speaker 1: it just described you, Like it was that smooth jazz

808
00:45:18,280 --> 00:45:21,960
Speaker 1: like inspirational music and I loved it.

809
00:45:21,960 --> 00:45:25,960
Speaker 4: It was a vibe like it was such a vibe.

810
00:45:26,160 --> 00:45:29,359
Speaker 2: Appreciate it, appreciated.

811
00:45:29,440 --> 00:45:31,320
Speaker 1: Like when I when I was listening to the album,

812
00:45:31,360 --> 00:45:34,959
Speaker 1: I was like, this is Jessie, Like I wouldn't know

813
00:45:35,280 --> 00:45:37,759
Speaker 1: just the vibe, the beat, the tempo. I was like,

814
00:45:37,800 --> 00:45:42,040
Speaker 1: I couldn't have imagined this album of would have been

815
00:45:42,120 --> 00:45:45,120
Speaker 1: like done any other way, Like it was perfect.

816
00:45:45,440 --> 00:45:47,640
Speaker 3: Thank you very much. No, we really wanted to thank

817
00:45:47,680 --> 00:45:50,319
Speaker 3: you for saying that. We just really wanted to make

818
00:45:50,360 --> 00:45:54,160
Speaker 3: a timeless, timeless album. I didn't want to make an

819
00:45:54,200 --> 00:45:56,960
Speaker 3: album that I thought was expected of me, which I

820
00:45:56,960 --> 00:46:00,279
Speaker 3: feel like people thought that it was going to be. Oh,

821
00:46:00,320 --> 00:46:01,960
Speaker 3: I don't know what people thought, but I did, but

822
00:46:02,440 --> 00:46:08,320
Speaker 3: me once again thinking ahead of me, having preconceived notions

823
00:46:08,360 --> 00:46:13,520
Speaker 3: about what the possibly possibility of other people's preconceived notions

824
00:46:13,520 --> 00:46:16,080
Speaker 3: could be. I did not want to make an album

825
00:46:16,160 --> 00:46:20,279
Speaker 3: that was about an incident or was about an experience,

826
00:46:20,320 --> 00:46:24,080
Speaker 3: but instead make an album that was about what happens

827
00:46:24,080 --> 00:46:26,680
Speaker 3: on the other side of that, what happens when you

828
00:46:27,400 --> 00:46:31,160
Speaker 3: when you do and I don't know if you, I

829
00:46:31,160 --> 00:46:33,760
Speaker 3: don't know if you ever really let it go, especially

830
00:46:33,840 --> 00:46:37,239
Speaker 3: when something I think that maybe when something happens to

831
00:46:37,320 --> 00:46:42,279
Speaker 3: you that is rather transformative and kind of change, the

832
00:46:42,560 --> 00:46:46,840
Speaker 3: changes the trajectory of your entire life. I think that

833
00:46:47,320 --> 00:46:50,640
Speaker 3: when something like that happens that's why I can so

834
00:46:50,760 --> 00:46:53,840
Speaker 3: identify with what you were saying about your mom. But

835
00:46:54,000 --> 00:46:57,759
Speaker 3: something like that happens when you are already at a

836
00:46:57,760 --> 00:47:01,279
Speaker 3: certain age. Just hear me out about that, and you're

837
00:47:01,280 --> 00:47:04,160
Speaker 3: already It doesn't mean that it's any more difficult than

838
00:47:04,520 --> 00:47:06,840
Speaker 3: when it happens to a young person. But when it

839
00:47:06,920 --> 00:47:10,160
Speaker 3: happens to you, when you're already a certain age, when

840
00:47:10,200 --> 00:47:15,520
Speaker 3: your life is pretty much built, you know, and all

841
00:47:15,600 --> 00:47:22,839
Speaker 3: that you've worked for, is you kind of do have

842
00:47:22,880 --> 00:47:26,279
Speaker 3: a chip on your shoulder. Yeah, that's just real. You

843
00:47:26,400 --> 00:47:28,239
Speaker 3: kind of do have a chip on your shoulder. And

844
00:47:28,360 --> 00:47:32,920
Speaker 3: I don't know if that chip goes away. I just

845
00:47:33,000 --> 00:47:39,480
Speaker 3: think you find cool, fashionable ways to cover it, you

846
00:47:39,520 --> 00:47:40,080
Speaker 3: know what I mean.

847
00:47:40,160 --> 00:47:41,440
Speaker 2: It just gets there.

848
00:47:41,719 --> 00:47:47,080
Speaker 3: It's there, and so but you also want to experience joy.

849
00:47:47,280 --> 00:47:50,960
Speaker 3: You want to laugh and smile and love and do

850
00:47:51,160 --> 00:47:54,640
Speaker 3: all these things and want to live life. And that's

851
00:47:54,680 --> 00:47:57,000
Speaker 3: probably one of the biggest fears is that you're afraid

852
00:47:57,040 --> 00:48:01,040
Speaker 3: that you'll never feel like yourself again. But you do,

853
00:48:01,680 --> 00:48:04,640
Speaker 3: and you feel like you feel like a better version

854
00:48:04,719 --> 00:48:09,240
Speaker 3: of yourself because you've been through literally you are cooked,

855
00:48:09,280 --> 00:48:13,440
Speaker 3: you roasted, you've been through the fire, and so what

856
00:48:13,640 --> 00:48:16,840
Speaker 3: else could be done, what else could be said?

857
00:48:17,400 --> 00:48:18,160
Speaker 2: It's all good.

858
00:48:18,880 --> 00:48:23,560
Speaker 1: Did that change your perspective though on fame and the public? Right?

859
00:48:24,120 --> 00:48:27,000
Speaker 2: Absolutely? Absolutely, first of all, but.

860
00:48:27,080 --> 00:48:30,560
Speaker 1: Were you were you nervous to I mean obviously about

861
00:48:30,560 --> 00:48:33,839
Speaker 1: special Forces now having this album out like we are,

862
00:48:33,880 --> 00:48:37,120
Speaker 1: you were Each step that you have taken to just

863
00:48:37,360 --> 00:48:41,680
Speaker 1: grow yourself and excel, they were probably all scary.

864
00:48:42,160 --> 00:48:46,200
Speaker 3: Of course they are. They were, they are they will

865
00:48:46,320 --> 00:48:50,080
Speaker 3: always be, you know. But at the same time, you

866
00:48:50,160 --> 00:48:55,400
Speaker 3: can't stay inside forever, and I was. I was, you know,

867
00:48:55,560 --> 00:48:58,000
Speaker 3: there were months here that I wouldn't go outside.

868
00:48:58,760 --> 00:49:02,080
Speaker 1: Jesse. This was such an episode. Thank you so much.

869
00:49:02,440 --> 00:49:06,040
Speaker 1: I love you, I love you and everyone make sure

870
00:49:06,040 --> 00:49:09,359
Speaker 1: to check out Jesse's new album. Where can they find it?

871
00:49:09,719 --> 00:49:10,239
Speaker 2: Breakout?

872
00:49:10,320 --> 00:49:14,440
Speaker 3: It's out everywhere streaming platforms, iTunes, we'll be having vinyls,

873
00:49:14,440 --> 00:49:16,160
Speaker 3: so all of the good things all.

874
00:49:16,239 --> 00:49:18,759
Speaker 1: On Spotify, that's right, on.

875
00:49:18,840 --> 00:49:23,200
Speaker 3: Apple Music, on title whatever, whatever place carries music. They

876
00:49:23,239 --> 00:49:25,279
Speaker 3: got it. TikTok. I don't know what y'all kids are

877
00:49:25,280 --> 00:49:26,239
Speaker 3: doing now, you know what I'm saying.

878
00:49:26,440 --> 00:49:28,680
Speaker 1: Maybe I should make a viral dance to it.

879
00:49:28,880 --> 00:49:30,960
Speaker 3: I think you need to do that. You pick your

880
00:49:31,000 --> 00:49:33,320
Speaker 3: song and you send it to me and we're gonna

881
00:49:33,320 --> 00:49:35,840
Speaker 3: make it go up up up up.

882
00:49:35,840 --> 00:49:37,799
Speaker 2: Do it, Miss Gia, I will.

883
00:49:37,920 --> 00:49:39,800
Speaker 1: We should just do it, like do something with casual

884
00:49:39,920 --> 00:49:43,000
Speaker 1: chaos to come on and put something with this new

885
00:49:43,080 --> 00:49:46,960
Speaker 1: song for the album. But love you so much guys.

886
00:49:47,000 --> 00:49:51,760
Speaker 1: Remember Special Forces World's Toughest Test is out now every

887
00:49:51,840 --> 00:49:54,759
Speaker 1: Thursday at nine eighth Central on Fox and the next

888
00:49:54,880 --> 00:49:58,600
Speaker 1: day on Hulu. All right until next week, Love you guys.

889
00:49:58,800 --> 00:50:05,240
Speaker 2: Bye, Understand still and stand