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Speaker 1: Spreading in with that at Tilly and Tanya Brad and

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Speaker 1: I Heart Radio and two time People's Choice Award winning

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Speaker 1: podcast Hi Everybody, Happy Monday. UM, this podcast is gonna

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Speaker 1: be a little bit different today just because you know,

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Speaker 1: we want to acknowledge what's going on in our world

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Speaker 1: and we want to have a conversation about it. So

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Speaker 1: our podcast today is going to be more about that,

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Speaker 1: And to be honest, I think podcast moving forward we

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Speaker 1: probably will discuss this topic moving forward, just because I

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Speaker 1: do believe that this change needs to go beyond and

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Speaker 1: this conversation needs to go beyond what's happening just specifically

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Speaker 1: this weekend last weekend, over the weekend UM, And it's

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Speaker 1: a conversation that, UM, I think a lot of people

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Speaker 1: have started to have for the first time, including myself.

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Speaker 1: I've always thought that just being quiet about things meant

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Speaker 1: that I was being peaceful and not causing confrontation and um,

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Speaker 1: avoiding criticism in any way that I could. And I

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Speaker 1: kind of over really after UM we had the podcast

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Speaker 1: where we discussed Hannah Brown what was happening in the

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Speaker 1: Facebook group, I kind of got tired of being quiet

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Speaker 1: and wanting to talk about it, so that's what we're

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Speaker 1: gonna do. And specifically, starting today, we're going to have

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Speaker 1: a conversation with a scrubber who message both Tania and myself.

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Speaker 1: Antonia is going to read the message. But um, she's

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Speaker 1: in our Facebook group, and um, we wanted to have

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Speaker 1: her on to kind of talk about her experience of

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Speaker 1: really just being a source for people who need resources

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Speaker 1: to educate themselves and learn more, and also how she

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Speaker 1: has felt in the Facebook group as a woman of color. Well,

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Speaker 1: I think for me, um, with I think with what's

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Speaker 1: happened specifically in the past week. You know, I've been

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Speaker 1: This isn't obviously, this has been going on for years

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Speaker 1: and years and years and years and years, and I

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Speaker 1: have acknowledged these things. And I always thought, like, you know,

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Speaker 1: I'm vocal and I am you know, not racist, and

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Speaker 1: I believe in being you know, loving everybody, and I

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Speaker 1: don't see color, and you know, I thought that was

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Speaker 1: part of the solution. And I've quickly realized that that's

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Speaker 1: not enough. And um, I think it is hard because

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Speaker 1: I will never understand what it's like to be, you know,

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Speaker 1: a woman of color because I'm a white woman and

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Speaker 1: you know, UM, my heart aches for the black community

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Speaker 1: because it's it's inhumane, it's not it's not okay. And

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Speaker 1: I think that, you know, I've always I've always thought

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Speaker 1: I was awoke individual, and um, I think I just

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Speaker 1: need I realized I need to. I really am not,

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Speaker 1: you know, and it's embarrassing. And um yeah, I saw

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Speaker 1: this message from Natalie Cherry and she said, Tanya, I

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Speaker 1: messaged Rebecca too. But I know y'all get so many

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Speaker 1: messages daily. As a black scrub sister, I want to

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Speaker 1: say that the support I've gotten from our scrub sisters

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Speaker 1: has been great. They have stepped up. I noticed that

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Speaker 1: a lot of people want to do better and ask

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Speaker 1: for resources. What do you think about maybe once a

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Speaker 1: week we choose a video or movie or show to

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Speaker 1: watch that showcase of the injustice of black people. And

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Speaker 1: I saw this and I was like, this is exactly

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Speaker 1: what for me personally, I need this, you know, Like

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Speaker 1: I I think one of the biggest steps is saying

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Speaker 1: I want to help. I want to do something, but

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Speaker 1: I don't know. I don't know what to do, you know.

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Speaker 1: And um, so I saw this and I really wanted

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Speaker 1: to get her on and get her, you know, to

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Speaker 1: talk because I'd love to hear her suggestions of how

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Speaker 1: she thinks that we can you know, um educate ourselves

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Speaker 1: better and things that we can watch and read and

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Speaker 1: and kind of continue that conversation from her perspective. Mm hmm. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I'm excited to talk to her. I UM, it's so

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Speaker 1: interesting because we had so many conversations recently, especially in

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Speaker 1: the Facebook group and on social media in general. It's

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Speaker 1: a lot of like political stuff, but this isn't a

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Speaker 1: political issue. This is a human rights issue. And I

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Speaker 1: just want people to be aware of what they get

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Speaker 1: defensive about and check what, um like, what you feel

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Speaker 1: like you're defending, because this this isn't something that can

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Speaker 1: be defended, and this is an issue that we all

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Speaker 1: need to learn more about and um educate ourselves on.

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Speaker 1: And so I'm really excited to talk to her and

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Speaker 1: kind of talk about how she spelled in a predominantly

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Speaker 1: white community which is our Facebook group. You know, if

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Speaker 1: you probably looked at most of them listeners in their backgrounds,

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Speaker 1: I would assume that most them were white. And I

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Speaker 1: am am excited to talk to her and hear her

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Speaker 1: viewpoint as someone UM in our community who is seeing

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Speaker 1: positivity and in looking forward to change. Hi Dadalie, Hi, Hey,

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Speaker 1: thanks for having me. Yeah, thank you for coming on

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Speaker 1: and having a conversation with us about what's going on, because, UM,

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Speaker 1: I don't know. I think it's just so important to

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Speaker 1: have someone speak on it from a black person's perspective

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Speaker 1: of what's going on, rather than us just talking about

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Speaker 1: our views and how what we're experiencing. I wanted to

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Speaker 1: hear what you're experiencing, UM, and especially in our Facebook group.

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Speaker 1: You know, you mentioned the positivity and how things are going,

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Speaker 1: so I just kind of wanted to get your perspective

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Speaker 1: on how things were before just recent times versus what's

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Speaker 1: happening now. UM. So, I come from a very small

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Speaker 1: town UM in Mississippi, the most segregated state that in

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Speaker 1: the nation. UM. But the school that I'm from, I

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Speaker 1: have in my twenty six years, I've never experienced racism.

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Speaker 1: I was actually messaged in one of my classmates UM Friday,

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Speaker 1: and I told her, I said, I'm so fortunate to

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Speaker 1: have had the classmates and the teachers that I had

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Speaker 1: because I've never experienced it. I didn't know, like I

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Speaker 1: wasn't oblivious to what's happening, but I've never had it

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Speaker 1: happened to me until So this was Friday when I

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Speaker 1: messaged her. Then that Saturday, I get to work and

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Speaker 1: I'm called a racial slur by a customer. Wow, I

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Speaker 1: went twenty six years without ever having anything. Two what

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Speaker 1: happened to me Saturday? Um, So for the Facebook group, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: that's yeah, that's how I can say it. Uh, some

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Speaker 1: people I want to do better. So if someone wants

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Speaker 1: to do better, it's our job, not just white people

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Speaker 1: white people, to to educate them. So that's that's been

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Speaker 1: That's been a really good thing to see the other

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Speaker 1: white people in the group stepping up and saying, you

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Speaker 1: know what, this is what you can do better. These

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Speaker 1: are the resources that I have that can help you

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Speaker 1: do better. And it's it's been very overwhelming that Um,

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Speaker 1: the support, it's it's it's such a positive group. So

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Speaker 1: I'm grateful to be a part of it. I'm really

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Speaker 1: happy to hear you say that, just because there is

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Speaker 1: so much negativity right now and I think, Um, I

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Speaker 1: was really you know, excited when I saw that you

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Speaker 1: said that in the mess age. But then also I

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Speaker 1: was also really curious as to the second part when

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Speaker 1: you said, you know, the idea of having somebody come

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Speaker 1: on and choose a video or a movie or show

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Speaker 1: to watch. The showcases the injustice of the black community,

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Speaker 1: because I think that's exactly what Um, that's exactly what

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Speaker 1: I know I need. So I think, you know, I

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Speaker 1: think I speak. I don't want to speak for you

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Speaker 1: back up, but I think a lot of people, you know,

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Speaker 1: we realize that, you know, we realize that there isn't injustice,

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Speaker 1: and we see it. We've seen it with our own eyes,

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Speaker 1: but we don't know what to do or how to help.

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Speaker 1: And I think being more well versed and more educated

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Speaker 1: on you know, with these movies and these videos and

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Speaker 1: things like that, it can help us better understand how

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Speaker 1: we can help and how to move forward in that direction.

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Speaker 1: So I'm really interested. I hope. I don't know if

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Speaker 1: you have like a list or something that we can

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Speaker 1: maybe post the Facebook group or talk about now, UM,

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Speaker 1: something that you think would be I wrote a few

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Speaker 1: things down. UM. I wanted to to share things that

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Speaker 1: kind been put out within the last few years. I

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Speaker 1: don't want to share anything from N Game forties. I

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Speaker 1: didn't want to share that because of course we know

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Speaker 1: that that happened back then. A lot of people are

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Speaker 1: oblivious to the fact that it still happened in two thousand,

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Speaker 1: fifteen and two thousand and twenty. So I wanted to

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Speaker 1: share things that have been recently a year on Netflix

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Speaker 1: and Hulu. Um, so I do list, and of course

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Speaker 1: I have more that I can share on the Facebook

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Speaker 1: group too. That's great. Do you want to share that list? Now?

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Speaker 1: Let's see. My favorite thing on Netflix is When They

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Speaker 1: See Us. It's about five black guys. Um, the Ava

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Speaker 1: du Vernay doc You series. Yes, that's probably my favorite

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Speaker 1: thing out right now. So that's a really really good start.

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Speaker 1: Seven powerful, powerful show, super proful, I mean, you have

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Speaker 1: to be. And it's so I feel like it's so

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Speaker 1: educational and you can learn. So it's things that I

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Speaker 1: didn't know of. Courtly, I'm twenty six, and there's things

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Speaker 1: that I had had to live through. So it's things

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Speaker 1: that I learned as a black woman. Um. Yeah. And

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Speaker 1: it's it's because you know, that was such a huge

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Speaker 1: story in the news and so I remember reading about it.

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Speaker 1: But you know, when you watch this this show and

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Speaker 1: you see what actually went down, Um, it's very eye opening.

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Speaker 1: So that's a really great one. I agree with you.

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Speaker 1: And I know there's some books that people, um, they

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Speaker 1: even recommending a lot. I don't personally, I don't like

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Speaker 1: books because, like you said, when you watch it, you

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Speaker 1: can read something, but when you watch it, you can

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Speaker 1: see the pain. So it's for me like I personally

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Speaker 1: like to watch it. I like to see people's faces

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Speaker 1: and see um and so you can I don't know,

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Speaker 1: I feel like you can look at someone's face until

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Speaker 1: that they're hurt. Mm hmm. That's that's super important to me.

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Speaker 1: But of course books are good too, but that's that's

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Speaker 1: the way people like to go. I'm just personally not

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Speaker 1: a thing. I agree. I mean, I think when you're

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Speaker 1: when you have visual It's so when I read about

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Speaker 1: um George Floyd before I watched the video, and I

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Speaker 1: read about it and I was mad. I had like

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Speaker 1: this weird I just felt sick to my stomach all

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Speaker 1: day just reading about it. And then when I watched

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Speaker 1: the video, I got so mad and it affected me

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Speaker 1: so differently than when I just read it. And so

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Speaker 1: I do agree there is something to like making yourself

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Speaker 1: watch what's what reality is and seeing what happened. Have

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Speaker 1: you by any chance to watch the documentary on now, yes,

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Speaker 1: that was my second recommendation. Oh sorry, take it away,

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Speaker 1: I'll shut up that that's that's a really good one too.

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Speaker 1: I like that one. I saw that. Um a few

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Speaker 1: people posted that they watched that recently. Yeah, I wanted

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Speaker 1: to get your take on it because you said, um,

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Speaker 1: you know, we all know what happened back in you know,

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Speaker 1: when the civil rights movement. But to be honest, when

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Speaker 1: I watched it, I felt like there were so many

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Speaker 1: things that I learned that I probably should have already

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Speaker 1: known about just in history. But it was so eye

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Speaker 1: opening to me to hear just what where this is

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Speaker 1: all simming from and why it's still happening today. It

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Speaker 1: makes so much more sense watching that documentary. It made

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Speaker 1: me understand so much more what's going on right now.

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Speaker 1: I agree. And it was weird because it came out

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Speaker 1: in like two thousand and sixteen, I think, and it

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Speaker 1: feels it feels like it was made for what's going on.

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Speaker 1: So that's what crazy, and that's why I wanted to

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Speaker 1: share things that have recently happened like it. Don't it's

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Speaker 1: crazy that these things are still happening in me, it's

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Speaker 1: it's so heartbreaking. Okay, So Number one was When They

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Speaker 1: See Us. Two was thirteen seven seconds is on Netflix.

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Speaker 1: Oh that that one hurt that a fifteen year old

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Speaker 1: black boy was killed and police covered it up. That

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Speaker 1: was a super sad one. Yes, this is a documentary.

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Speaker 1: Is it a it's a series. Oh it's only one season. Um,

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Speaker 1: but it was it was a good It was good.

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Speaker 1: Okay seven seconds Hm. Now I've just watched this within

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Speaker 1: the last week and it's called The Hate You Give.

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Speaker 1: It's on Hulu. They also have a book, so if

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Speaker 1: people like to read books, that's a that's another good one.

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Speaker 1: This was about a black guy getting killed by the

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Speaker 1: cops in front of his best friend. It's hard. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I still really when it came out in theaters and

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Speaker 1: I I just sat in my seat afterwards because I,

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Speaker 1: I don't know, there's this level of just guilt that happened.

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Speaker 1: You know, when you see what I think, what you

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Speaker 1: were saying, the visual aspect of it, it just makes

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Speaker 1: it so much more I opening and real to what

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Speaker 1: what is happening that we just you know, we see

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Speaker 1: media coverage every now and then on some of them,

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Speaker 1: but how often it's happening. Yeah, I know a lot

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Speaker 1: of black people. They said they couldn't even watch the

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Speaker 1: video of George Floyd because they know, like it hits

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Speaker 1: so close to home that some black people won't even

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Speaker 1: watch it. Okay, yeah, I I posted the video of

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Speaker 1: my story just out of I was so angry and

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Speaker 1: I was like the way made me feel. I thought

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Speaker 1: everyone needs to see they need to feel this. And

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Speaker 1: then I got a lot of comments saying it's triggering

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Speaker 1: for people to watch. And so that was something that

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Speaker 1: I learned, and it's something to keep in mind when

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Speaker 1: you're when you're mad and you're you know, trying to

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Speaker 1: be an ally and show of support there is you

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Speaker 1: have to be careful of what content you're posting for

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Speaker 1: people to watch and see. Yeah, I agree with that too.

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Speaker 1: All right, let's get your fifth recommendation and then maybe

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Speaker 1: you can post the rest of the rest of the

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Speaker 1: list in the Facebook group for everybody. Okay, this isn't

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Speaker 1: a movie. UM, this is a podcast. It's called Speaking

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Speaker 1: of Racism, which is a really I mean, obviously people

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Speaker 1: listen to podcasts, so that's a good one. A good

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Speaker 1: one to listen to. Who is it? Is it um

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Speaker 1: stories or is it just conversation? What's the premise of

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Speaker 1: its stories, its stories conversation in conversations, it's both okay, cool,

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Speaker 1: who are the host? Oh, let me go back and look,

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Speaker 1: I don't think that down. Oh that's what I have

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Speaker 1: to non't have to look it up. I'll post all

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Speaker 1: of that on the Facebook group. UM. I wanted to

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Speaker 1: get your opinion because I saw a post in the

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Speaker 1: Facebook group before we started the podcast today, and it

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Speaker 1: was a conversation about how to handle people in your

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Speaker 1: life who are defensive about what's going on right now

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Speaker 1: and not um, I guess yeah, defending their racism and saying,

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Speaker 1: you know, what's going on is wrong and it's out

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Speaker 1: of control. I just wanted to get your take on

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Speaker 1: it because it's there's a lot of people who are

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Speaker 1: struggling with how to how to have those conversations. Do

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Speaker 1: you and have those conversations? What's where do you stand

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Speaker 1: on that? I think so About the thing that happened

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Speaker 1: to me Saturday with the white man calling me a

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Speaker 1: racial are I was so speechless, I couldn't use my voice.

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Speaker 1: I couldn't I was so hurt and words couldn't even

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Speaker 1: come out of my mouth. Thankfully, I had other white

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Speaker 1: patients in the room and they spoke up for me.

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Speaker 1: M hm. So sometimes you have to I know, it's

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Speaker 1: super I know it's uncomfortable. I mean, it's uncomfortable for

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Speaker 1: black people. So I know it's uncomfortable to speak, especially

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Speaker 1: towards for people, to people that you love. But if

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Speaker 1: you have to do it, I mean, you have to

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Speaker 1: do what's right. It's what I think. It's going to

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Speaker 1: be uncomfortable. You have to tell them we're uncomfortable. I'm

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Speaker 1: uncomfortable now going to work. I don't want to go

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Speaker 1: to work. Yeah, I'm I'm so sorry that happened, and

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Speaker 1: especially in a time right now where there's already so

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Speaker 1: much hate and but people are having are recognizing this

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Speaker 1: and trying to do better. The fact that you go

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Speaker 1: twenty six years without experience seeing that and then during

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Speaker 1: this time you experience that is so heartbreaking and it's

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Speaker 1: so it's painful. It's really painful and really really hurtful.

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Speaker 1: H Did y'all see the post about someone in a

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Speaker 1: Facebook group she asked about she supports Black Lives Matter?

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Speaker 1: Her boyfriend, who she was in the process of buying

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Speaker 1: the house with, did it support it. Oh? I think

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Speaker 1: I did see that. Yes, oh, I did not. She

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Speaker 1: she made a comment and she actually updated and she

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Speaker 1: said she broke up with him and she's out of

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Speaker 1: so much money and and that's what we need. I

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Speaker 1: know that was hard for her to leave someone you love,

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Speaker 1: to stack up for black people that you don't know.

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Speaker 1: M So I can only imagine how hard that was

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Speaker 1: for her. But I won't say her name. But if

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Speaker 1: she's listening, I want her to know that she is

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Speaker 1: so appreciated. And that's exactly what That's exactly what we did.

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Speaker 1: That's actually what I was gonna That's what I wanted

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Speaker 1: to ask you, was you know, um, as a black woman,

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Speaker 1: what do you want to see more of from you know,

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Speaker 1: the white women and your allies and the people that

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Speaker 1: want to do good and and and and be a

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Speaker 1: part of the solution and help. You know, what do

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Speaker 1: you want to see more of? Don't be afraid to

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Speaker 1: speak up. That's that's a big one, um. And don't

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Speaker 1: be afraid to ask for help. I'm and I still

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Speaker 1: need to be educated on some things. And I'm a

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Speaker 1: black woman. Talk to all you imagine white people, UM,

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Speaker 1: who's who doesn't know really what's going on? So it's

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Speaker 1: okay to ask for help. It's okay to be ignorant

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Speaker 1: to the subject, because I've been ignorant to the subject too,

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Speaker 1: So it's okay to ask for help. It's okay to

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Speaker 1: take other people's opinions, um and just speak up. I mean,

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Speaker 1: that's the big one, speak up for what's right. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I think that's a It's very powerful because I think,

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Speaker 1: you know, um again, like it's like, I don't I

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Speaker 1: can't imagine what it feels like to be um judged

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Speaker 1: by the color of my skin, the be judged on

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Speaker 1: the person that I love, um, be judged on things.

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Speaker 1: I just I really can't imagine, And so my heart

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Speaker 1: goes out too. I'm really sorry that the happening this weekend.

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Speaker 1: That are you okay, Yeah, I'm just I think I

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Speaker 1: just so sad that this is still happening, and I'm

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Speaker 1: like really grateful that people are standing up and I'm

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Speaker 1: doing what's right, but it's just like so sad that

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Speaker 1: this is even that we're in this time and that

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Speaker 1: that people are still defending hey you know, oh yeah,

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Speaker 1: but I really, Natalie, I really want to say thank

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Speaker 1: you for calling it and sharing your experience, and I'm

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Speaker 1: so sorry that that happened to this weekend. Like, my

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Speaker 1: hope that would be that you never have to that

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Speaker 1: twenty six years would be way more than that that

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Speaker 1: you ever experienced that before. Thank you, bea and thank you.

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Speaker 1: I mean you've used your platform, you've spoken up. I mean,

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Speaker 1: you've done You're doing good. You are We need people

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Speaker 1: like you, and I've been I've been really actually moved

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Speaker 1: by a lot of the um the people that I've

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Speaker 1: been talking about, you know, talking to their kids in

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Speaker 1: the next generation about what's going on, and hoping and

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Speaker 1: praying that by the time they grow up that they

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Speaker 1: won't they won't have to, you know, have to deal

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Speaker 1: with this injustice and that they won't be treated this way.

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Speaker 1: And I think it's such a hopeful outlook because you know,

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Speaker 1: it does start in the home. You know, it does

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Speaker 1: start with conversation, these conversations with our children and the

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Speaker 1: next generation, you know, and um, it's really important that

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Speaker 1: that we communicate. I hope I have a three and

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Speaker 1: a half year old and I'm I hope that whenever

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Speaker 1: he's old enough, but this, this isn't happening. Yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 1: I mean it's up to this generation to change what

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Speaker 1: happens next. So I will say that I've never seen

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Speaker 1: so many people speak out. So this is a good start. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: a really really good start. Well, thank you for the

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Speaker 1: list of resources for people to to watch until to

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Speaker 1: learn and to educate. And um, we'll like continue asking

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Speaker 1: people to share what they're you know, reading or listening

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Speaker 1: to her watching, just so that this conversation goes way

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Speaker 1: beyond this week or you know, for sure make sure

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Speaker 1: that this isn't just a one time thing, but that

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Speaker 1: people are consistently and constantly learning about themselves and how

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Speaker 1: to be better and do better. Mm hmm. I actually

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Speaker 1: just recently found out that my friend Ali, she hasn't

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Speaker 1: one year old, and she buys all of her, um,

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Speaker 1: her daughter's dolls in every single color. Yeah, I love it.

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Speaker 1: And it's just like these little things you know, um,

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Speaker 1: that we can do that I think we'll ultimately make

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Speaker 1: a big difference. Thank you so much. I love you. Okay,

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Speaker 1: are you okay? Do you want to take a minute?

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Speaker 1: I would think I'm okay, I just got something hit

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Speaker 1: home home just like really amst on. I think, like, um,

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Speaker 1: people standing up for what's right is just it's hard,

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Speaker 1: and it's uncomfortable and so to know that that girl

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Speaker 1: who was like struggling because she was like, I'm notving

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Speaker 1: in with my boyfriend and we're supposed to good engage,

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Speaker 1: but like he doesn't think that it's wrong, and like

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Speaker 1: the fact that she took the really difficult step to

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Speaker 1: inconvenience herself in her life to stand up for something.

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Speaker 1: Just I think that just m made me feel emotional.

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Speaker 1: But I mean, I think I'm it's a lot of

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Speaker 1: mm hmm feelings in general of what's going on, and

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Speaker 1: you know, it's like difficult conversations mhm but necessary. Yeah, Okay, um,

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Speaker 1: let's take a break then for a second, all right,

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Speaker 1: and we're back. Um. Becca has that's some more herd

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Speaker 1: her ride her tears. Yeah, Okay. When I if I

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Speaker 1: get emotional and start crying, especially when it's like a

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Speaker 1: build up cry, it takes me a while to like

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Speaker 1: get recover, I guess, but I think I needed that release.

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Speaker 1: So I've been feeling it. But I think yeah, And

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Speaker 1: I think also what you're feeling is very like normal,

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Speaker 1: and I think a lot of people are feeling that way.

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Speaker 1: Like I definitely feel like I've been depressed hearing and

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Speaker 1: seeing everything that's been going on and um, not really

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Speaker 1: knowing how to handle it. And I also think for you, um,

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Speaker 1: you know, it's a lot. There's just like a lot

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Speaker 1: going on and and you have you've been you've been

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Speaker 1: quiet and because you don't want to like rattle the

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Speaker 1: boat or rattle the cage. And I think you're starting

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Speaker 1: to kind of come out on the other end of that. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: I mean, I think it's realizing that having a platform

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Speaker 1: like we do give you the opportunity to like encouraged

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Speaker 1: people to make a change, and being quiet on topics

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Speaker 1: that are so important to be talked about is just

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Speaker 1: I feel like wasting the opportunities that we have. So

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Speaker 1: I think a lot of the emotion and discomfort has

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Speaker 1: come from years of being quiet on things I needed

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Speaker 1: to be quiet about. Yeah, And I think for me,

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Speaker 1: I realized, like I pride myself and being like, you know,

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Speaker 1: part of woke nation, and I'm like, you know, in it,

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Speaker 1: and I'm like here, you know women's rights and you

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Speaker 1: know the me Too movement, and you know, I stand

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Speaker 1: up and I speak loud, and there's a you know,

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Speaker 1: there's there's some things that I don't speak loud about

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Speaker 1: and that's not okay. You know there, it's not okay,

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Speaker 1: And it's because I and it's because I am not

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Speaker 1: educated enough. And I think I realized that what I

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00:28:04,040 --> 00:28:08,919
Speaker 1: have been doing is isn't isn't enough. So yeah, we

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00:28:08,920 --> 00:28:11,200
Speaker 1: can all be doing more. So it's just about doing

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Speaker 1: our part and having conversations and like being willing to

427
00:28:15,520 --> 00:28:18,000
Speaker 1: be corrected. I think because a lot of us are

428
00:28:18,040 --> 00:28:19,600
Speaker 1: like I don't know what to say. I'm scared I'm

429
00:28:19,600 --> 00:28:22,240
Speaker 1: gonna say the wrong thing, but being saying how you

430
00:28:22,280 --> 00:28:25,359
Speaker 1: feel and stepping up and being mad but being ready

431
00:28:25,440 --> 00:28:32,359
Speaker 1: to accept correction if people like stand you know, say hey,

432
00:28:32,680 --> 00:28:36,000
Speaker 1: I appreciate the effort, but the saying it. You know,

433
00:28:36,080 --> 00:28:38,800
Speaker 1: Like there was that thing going around with people and

434
00:28:38,800 --> 00:28:42,280
Speaker 1: it was like tag ten people who won't break the chain.

435
00:28:42,320 --> 00:28:44,280
Speaker 1: And someone wrote me and they were like what is

436
00:28:44,320 --> 00:28:48,480
Speaker 1: this for? Like this isn't it? I appreciate this the

437
00:28:48,600 --> 00:28:51,480
Speaker 1: thought behind it, but like, what is it? Why aren't

438
00:28:51,480 --> 00:28:56,720
Speaker 1: you sharing sources or like helping people to educate themselves

439
00:28:56,720 --> 00:28:58,800
Speaker 1: instead of just tagging people? Like what's the point? I

440
00:28:58,840 --> 00:29:01,320
Speaker 1: was like, I don't know. I'm just trying to do

441
00:29:01,400 --> 00:29:04,040
Speaker 1: the right thing. But right, it's so true it's like, yeah,

442
00:29:04,080 --> 00:29:08,280
Speaker 1: we're all just like trying, trying, yeah, and I think yeah,

443
00:29:08,320 --> 00:29:11,680
Speaker 1: and and being able to hear them when they say

444
00:29:11,720 --> 00:29:15,280
Speaker 1: this ain't it. But I appreciate you not getting defensive

445
00:29:15,280 --> 00:29:18,040
Speaker 1: about it, being like, you're right, what was the point

446
00:29:18,080 --> 00:29:21,840
Speaker 1: of me tagging ten people? Because I did it twice?

447
00:29:22,400 --> 00:29:27,040
Speaker 1: You know. It's like, so, I think it's just having conversations,

448
00:29:27,400 --> 00:29:32,440
Speaker 1: um with like the black community, but also within ourselves

449
00:29:32,480 --> 00:29:34,840
Speaker 1: of how to do better. And I know we're gonna

450
00:29:34,840 --> 00:29:37,600
Speaker 1: be talking to Becka Tobin just hearing a little bit

451
00:29:37,640 --> 00:29:40,720
Speaker 1: about you know, what they're doing with the Lady Gang

452
00:29:40,800 --> 00:29:43,200
Speaker 1: and they just came out with the book. But you know,

453
00:29:43,320 --> 00:29:47,640
Speaker 1: it's like focusing on what's important right now, and um,

454
00:29:47,720 --> 00:29:49,800
Speaker 1: so I'm excited to talk to her. They posted a

455
00:29:49,840 --> 00:29:53,440
Speaker 1: really really great statement all as a unit, which I

456
00:29:53,440 --> 00:29:57,400
Speaker 1: thought was really great. Yeah. I agree. We've talked recently

457
00:29:57,400 --> 00:30:00,280
Speaker 1: on this very show about how hard it to put

458
00:30:00,280 --> 00:30:03,080
Speaker 1: yourself in somebody else's shoes right now. I we'll never

459
00:30:03,080 --> 00:30:04,640
Speaker 1: know what it's like to be black and to be

460
00:30:04,680 --> 00:30:06,360
Speaker 1: gay and to be I'll never know what it's like

461
00:30:06,400 --> 00:30:07,920
Speaker 1: to be a woman. Blah blah blah blah blah. But

462
00:30:08,040 --> 00:30:10,160
Speaker 1: so awful. When one of the people and these oppressed

463
00:30:10,640 --> 00:30:14,160
Speaker 1: groups says this is awful and this is making me

464
00:30:14,200 --> 00:30:18,520
Speaker 1: feel this way, they're met with calm down, everything's fine.

465
00:30:20,280 --> 00:30:22,880
Speaker 1: That's what's missing, That's that's where the empathy is lacking.

466
00:30:23,960 --> 00:30:26,400
Speaker 1: And that's why I've really tried to make this into

467
00:30:26,400 --> 00:30:29,200
Speaker 1: a teachable moment for my kids. And we have some

468
00:30:29,240 --> 00:30:31,480
Speaker 1: callers this morning with Seacrest saying how do I talk

469
00:30:31,480 --> 00:30:32,880
Speaker 1: to my kids about this? And to me, this is

470
00:30:32,880 --> 00:30:35,720
Speaker 1: an easy one because it's such a great opportunity to

471
00:30:35,800 --> 00:30:38,680
Speaker 1: talk to them about empathy and how you will never

472
00:30:38,800 --> 00:30:40,480
Speaker 1: know what it's like to be that way. So you

473
00:30:40,520 --> 00:30:43,200
Speaker 1: can't say that doesn't sound so bad. You can't say,

474
00:30:43,280 --> 00:30:45,240
Speaker 1: what are they complaining about? You don't know, you don't

475
00:30:45,240 --> 00:30:47,240
Speaker 1: know what that's like, and you never will. And so

476
00:30:47,360 --> 00:30:50,040
Speaker 1: you have to listen because what they're saying is how

477
00:30:50,120 --> 00:30:53,200
Speaker 1: they feel and you have to respect that. And so

478
00:30:53,280 --> 00:30:56,040
Speaker 1: I've I've it's been interesting talking to them about it

479
00:30:56,080 --> 00:30:58,120
Speaker 1: and hearing their points of view on it and explaining

480
00:30:58,120 --> 00:31:01,920
Speaker 1: what happened in Minnesota and what happened and why it

481
00:31:02,000 --> 00:31:04,080
Speaker 1: was wrong, and how the guy has been arrested and

482
00:31:04,120 --> 00:31:06,360
Speaker 1: this is gonna happen and this is probably gonna happen,

483
00:31:06,360 --> 00:31:08,360
Speaker 1: and all this stuff and why people are so upset.

484
00:31:08,920 --> 00:31:12,240
Speaker 1: And then there's three elements to that. There's the protesting,

485
00:31:12,440 --> 00:31:16,080
Speaker 1: which everyone's for because everyone has the right to voice

486
00:31:16,120 --> 00:31:18,800
Speaker 1: their opinion and march and sing and sit and everything else.

487
00:31:19,160 --> 00:31:22,680
Speaker 1: And then there's looting, which everyone's against and that's wrong

488
00:31:22,760 --> 00:31:25,360
Speaker 1: and they shouldn't be stealing things and taking this opportunity

489
00:31:25,520 --> 00:31:28,120
Speaker 1: to enrich themselves. And then there's the middle part, which

490
00:31:28,200 --> 00:31:31,400
Speaker 1: is rioting, and that's kind of in a gray area

491
00:31:31,680 --> 00:31:35,120
Speaker 1: because while it is very uncomfortable for us to see

492
00:31:35,160 --> 00:31:38,000
Speaker 1: this happening on TV with smashing windows and starting cars

493
00:31:38,040 --> 00:31:43,520
Speaker 1: on fire, um, rioting has changed the world. And so

494
00:31:44,440 --> 00:31:46,840
Speaker 1: that's another thing I want to teach them. It's just

495
00:31:46,920 --> 00:31:51,360
Speaker 1: because you see all these people misbehaving on television. It's

496
00:31:51,400 --> 00:31:55,600
Speaker 1: like Martin Luther King said, rioting is the voice of

497
00:31:55,680 --> 00:31:58,960
Speaker 1: the unheard, and when no one listens for long enough,

498
00:31:59,000 --> 00:32:00,880
Speaker 1: you've got to do something to make them listen. And

499
00:32:00,920 --> 00:32:03,880
Speaker 1: I'm not advocating going out and doing this stuff, but

500
00:32:03,960 --> 00:32:06,640
Speaker 1: sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do. Yeah, It's like,

501
00:32:06,800 --> 00:32:10,120
Speaker 1: you know, talking isn't getting us anywhere, so it's like

502
00:32:10,760 --> 00:32:12,720
Speaker 1: there's something that needs to be how many more people

503
00:32:12,760 --> 00:32:15,680
Speaker 1: need to die before something is done? So that's what happens.

504
00:32:15,680 --> 00:32:17,160
Speaker 1: And when you look at riots, you look at the

505
00:32:17,160 --> 00:32:20,040
Speaker 1: Stonewall riots in the sixties, that was a big deal

506
00:32:20,080 --> 00:32:22,360
Speaker 1: for gay rights. And there is now a plaque on

507
00:32:22,440 --> 00:32:25,560
Speaker 1: the wall on that street in New York where those

508
00:32:25,640 --> 00:32:29,320
Speaker 1: riots happened. Stuff was set on fire and stuff was destroyed,

509
00:32:29,400 --> 00:32:32,200
Speaker 1: but now it's a historical monument because of the change

510
00:32:32,240 --> 00:32:35,160
Speaker 1: that came from that. So to me, complaining about the

511
00:32:35,240 --> 00:32:38,480
Speaker 1: broken glass and the police cars on fire is like

512
00:32:38,520 --> 00:32:41,720
Speaker 1: complaining about all that wonderful, delicious tea that we lost

513
00:32:41,720 --> 00:32:44,760
Speaker 1: in Boston Harbor in the sevent hundreds. You know, No,

514
00:32:45,000 --> 00:32:47,360
Speaker 1: you never read about the tea that was wasted. You

515
00:32:47,400 --> 00:32:49,680
Speaker 1: read about the Boston Tea party and the change that

516
00:32:49,760 --> 00:32:52,560
Speaker 1: came from that. So anyway, it is a discussions that

517
00:32:52,640 --> 00:32:56,280
Speaker 1: I'm forcing my children to have. Yeah, it's it's I

518
00:32:56,320 --> 00:32:59,520
Speaker 1: was listening to this um this Chris Rocks, and he

519
00:32:59,640 --> 00:33:02,360
Speaker 1: said it was tweet. Somebody posted it was um. He

520
00:33:02,400 --> 00:33:05,200
Speaker 1: said something about how everybody just says, you know, there's

521
00:33:05,200 --> 00:33:07,920
Speaker 1: always there's always a couple of bad apples in every

522
00:33:08,200 --> 00:33:12,000
Speaker 1: um in every you know, industry, a couple of bad apples.

523
00:33:12,080 --> 00:33:15,600
Speaker 1: He was just like, a couple of bad apples should

524
00:33:15,640 --> 00:33:19,040
Speaker 1: not be in certain industries. Like it's not you know

525
00:33:19,080 --> 00:33:24,480
Speaker 1: what I mean, Like it was just like pilots, pilots. Yeah, yeah,

526
00:33:24,480 --> 00:33:27,720
Speaker 1: He's like American airlines can't be like, hey, we have

527
00:33:28,000 --> 00:33:30,000
Speaker 1: most of them are good, but we have a few

528
00:33:30,040 --> 00:33:31,960
Speaker 1: bad ones that were not sure if they can land.

529
00:33:32,920 --> 00:33:35,920
Speaker 1: I'm not sure about that. It's like no, and like

530
00:33:36,200 --> 00:33:39,360
Speaker 1: it's just not it's not okay. You know, I think

531
00:33:39,360 --> 00:33:42,760
Speaker 1: the whole sentences one bad apple can spoil the whole

532
00:33:42,760 --> 00:33:46,160
Speaker 1: bunch that was happening right now. So saying it's just

533
00:33:46,200 --> 00:33:49,760
Speaker 1: a couple of bad apples, well it's spoiling everything. Yeah.

534
00:33:49,920 --> 00:33:52,720
Speaker 1: And it's like I want to make it clear, like

535
00:33:52,920 --> 00:33:56,880
Speaker 1: we're I think our country is perfectly aware that there

536
00:33:56,880 --> 00:33:59,760
Speaker 1: are good people who are cops, but this isn't about

537
00:33:59,800 --> 00:34:03,240
Speaker 1: the people, and the change is that they need to

538
00:34:03,240 --> 00:34:06,320
Speaker 1: take a stand against the bad ones and stand up

539
00:34:06,320 --> 00:34:08,440
Speaker 1: for what is right. It has nothing to do with

540
00:34:08,480 --> 00:34:10,879
Speaker 1: saying there's no good people in the police force. It's

541
00:34:10,880 --> 00:34:15,040
Speaker 1: saying no, there's yeah, it's like the yeah, sorry, go ahead.

542
00:34:15,200 --> 00:34:18,200
Speaker 1: It's just saying like if you're part of the police force,

543
00:34:18,239 --> 00:34:20,640
Speaker 1: then you need to stand up against police brutality and

544
00:34:20,640 --> 00:34:25,320
Speaker 1: what's happening to people. And that's how you're a good cop. Yeah,

545
00:34:25,560 --> 00:34:29,719
Speaker 1: Like I love, I love like I feel safe when

546
00:34:29,719 --> 00:34:31,680
Speaker 1: I know like cops around. I call the cops all

547
00:34:31,680 --> 00:34:35,440
Speaker 1: the time when I feel, you know, danger in my

548
00:34:35,440 --> 00:34:39,400
Speaker 1: neighborhood or in front of my apartment or like whatever. Um,

549
00:34:39,560 --> 00:34:45,040
Speaker 1: but there this cop killed a man. Like it's not

550
00:34:45,560 --> 00:34:48,920
Speaker 1: And this isn't about taking sides you really with cops,

551
00:34:48,960 --> 00:34:50,960
Speaker 1: for you with black people, it's not about that at all,

552
00:34:50,960 --> 00:34:52,759
Speaker 1: but a lot of people seem to be making it

553
00:34:52,840 --> 00:34:55,680
Speaker 1: into that, which is wrong. And there's so many cops

554
00:34:55,680 --> 00:34:57,960
Speaker 1: they're out there marching with these protesters, and that's that's

555
00:34:58,000 --> 00:35:00,600
Speaker 1: the way to do this totally. I think the whole

556
00:35:00,600 --> 00:35:02,560
Speaker 1: point in Tanny is what you said is like we

557
00:35:02,680 --> 00:35:05,600
Speaker 1: are white, we feel safe with the cops, but black

558
00:35:05,600 --> 00:35:09,040
Speaker 1: people don't feel safe. The cops don't make them feel safe,

559
00:35:09,080 --> 00:35:13,680
Speaker 1: they make them feel the opposite. True, So I am

560
00:35:13,719 --> 00:35:18,080
Speaker 1: it is it's like such a time of divide and um,

561
00:35:18,120 --> 00:35:21,120
Speaker 1: but also seeing so many people stand up and come together,

562
00:35:21,280 --> 00:35:24,640
Speaker 1: it's like seeing both. And I was selling Tanya It's

563
00:35:24,680 --> 00:35:29,520
Speaker 1: weird because there's so many conflicting feelings of um, like

564
00:35:29,800 --> 00:35:34,359
Speaker 1: pride of seeing people stand up, and also just disheartening

565
00:35:34,480 --> 00:35:40,600
Speaker 1: saying the people, you know, just breaking the unity. So

566
00:35:41,800 --> 00:35:45,760
Speaker 1: like I was saying, I feel like, um, if somebody

567
00:35:45,800 --> 00:35:50,680
Speaker 1: told me, you know, because I have never I've never

568
00:35:50,680 --> 00:35:54,000
Speaker 1: experienced it. I'm a white woman. And also I've never

569
00:35:54,040 --> 00:35:57,400
Speaker 1: experienced somebody, you know, I could not imagine. I would

570
00:35:57,400 --> 00:36:00,560
Speaker 1: be infuriated if somebody told me. I couldn't you know,

571
00:36:01,840 --> 00:36:05,839
Speaker 1: I love the man that I love because he's a

572
00:36:05,840 --> 00:36:08,359
Speaker 1: man or not a man or whatever, you know what

573
00:36:08,360 --> 00:36:11,279
Speaker 1: I mean. Like, it's just like I I refused, Yeah,

574
00:36:11,400 --> 00:36:15,520
Speaker 1: like I just can't. I really, I would be so pissed.

575
00:36:16,600 --> 00:36:18,920
Speaker 1: And it's like, why am I not being pissed for

576
00:36:18,960 --> 00:36:26,959
Speaker 1: other people? I think that's what I realized, especially this week. Yeah, well,

577
00:36:26,960 --> 00:36:29,760
Speaker 1: we're gonna bring Becca in and talk to her about,

578
00:36:30,239 --> 00:36:34,400
Speaker 1: you know, what's been going on for her personally, and um,

579
00:36:34,440 --> 00:36:37,120
Speaker 1: I know she, like I said, they posted a statement,

580
00:36:37,160 --> 00:36:38,680
Speaker 1: so I want to talk about that and then talk

581
00:36:38,760 --> 00:36:42,719
Speaker 1: about their new book, Act like a Lady, and we

582
00:36:42,800 --> 00:37:03,400
Speaker 1: will be right back with her. Um all right, scrubbers,

583
00:37:03,640 --> 00:37:06,960
Speaker 1: would you please join me and giving a warm welcome

584
00:37:07,000 --> 00:37:13,600
Speaker 1: to our guest today, the one, the only, Becca Tobin. Hi, ladies.

585
00:37:15,200 --> 00:37:21,240
Speaker 1: She looks glowy. Oh my goodness. She looks like she's

586
00:37:21,280 --> 00:37:24,480
Speaker 1: just really taking care of herself in the tiny corner

587
00:37:24,520 --> 00:37:28,120
Speaker 1: where I see you. I know. Actually, Caitlin Bristow once

588
00:37:28,160 --> 00:37:30,120
Speaker 1: said it best. I think it was her. She's like,

589
00:37:30,160 --> 00:37:34,200
Speaker 1: before bed, I look like a glazed donut. It's so true.

590
00:37:34,320 --> 00:37:38,919
Speaker 1: It's literally exactly what I look like before bed. It's

591
00:37:39,000 --> 00:37:44,879
Speaker 1: crazy because of all the products, oils and serums and

592
00:37:44,960 --> 00:37:49,400
Speaker 1: the whole nine. Wow. I remember when I first started,

593
00:37:49,600 --> 00:37:53,480
Speaker 1: when I first started dating uh red Star, he would

594
00:37:53,480 --> 00:37:56,919
Speaker 1: like comment on like the like the appearance of my face,

595
00:37:56,960 --> 00:37:59,919
Speaker 1: and I was like, Oh, it's bedtime. Huh yeah, yeah,

596
00:38:00,480 --> 00:38:09,520
Speaker 1: I love that that signals bedtime. Yeah. Slippery, just it's slippery,

597
00:38:09,680 --> 00:38:12,440
Speaker 1: so it's time time to sleep. Is that a map

598
00:38:12,520 --> 00:38:16,120
Speaker 1: behind you, Becca, Yeah, it's a map of Paris. Oh cool.

599
00:38:17,160 --> 00:38:19,520
Speaker 1: I love being able to see inside of everybody's homes.

600
00:38:20,400 --> 00:38:22,680
Speaker 1: I don't like, I don't need, you know, I never

601
00:38:22,800 --> 00:38:26,280
Speaker 1: needed to see inside of so many homes. It's fine

602
00:38:26,600 --> 00:38:29,600
Speaker 1: with the element of mystery. Yeah, I guess you're right.

603
00:38:29,680 --> 00:38:34,759
Speaker 1: There's there's there's good, there's good and bad. Yeah, Um,

604
00:38:34,800 --> 00:38:38,360
Speaker 1: how's it going. I mean, I'm so excited for the book.

605
00:38:38,400 --> 00:38:41,479
Speaker 1: I pre ordered it and it finally came I didn't

606
00:38:41,480 --> 00:38:43,640
Speaker 1: realize just the first book I've ever pre ordered, so

607
00:38:43,680 --> 00:38:46,399
Speaker 1: it was a new experience for me. I think same,

608
00:38:46,560 --> 00:38:51,719
Speaker 1: it was the first book I ever pre ordered. Like

609
00:38:51,760 --> 00:38:55,120
Speaker 1: when it came in, I was so excited because I

610
00:38:55,120 --> 00:38:58,359
Speaker 1: had ordered it so long ago. But it's such an

611
00:38:58,360 --> 00:39:00,920
Speaker 1: excite I mean, it's obviously they're so much going on

612
00:39:01,080 --> 00:39:05,000
Speaker 1: right now with the release, and like, you know, being

613
00:39:05,040 --> 00:39:08,759
Speaker 1: sure that we're talking about important issues that are going

614
00:39:08,800 --> 00:39:11,640
Speaker 1: on is obviously the focus. But it is an exciting

615
00:39:11,680 --> 00:39:14,120
Speaker 1: time of what happened is something that you've been working

616
00:39:14,200 --> 00:39:18,719
Speaker 1: on for a while. Yeah, thank you. We're excited. We've

617
00:39:18,719 --> 00:39:20,640
Speaker 1: had a lot of support, like from the community. The

618
00:39:20,680 --> 00:39:24,160
Speaker 1: girls are taking pictures of them like receiving their books.

619
00:39:24,280 --> 00:39:27,520
Speaker 1: And you know, it's always nice when you put your

620
00:39:27,560 --> 00:39:29,520
Speaker 1: head down and you spend a year writing a book

621
00:39:29,520 --> 00:39:31,960
Speaker 1: and then finally other people get to read it other

622
00:39:32,040 --> 00:39:36,000
Speaker 1: than like the three of us and our editors. Um,

623
00:39:36,040 --> 00:39:38,480
Speaker 1: so it's been nice. And things that you don't realize

624
00:39:38,480 --> 00:39:41,840
Speaker 1: that you that mean a lot to people are resonate

625
00:39:41,880 --> 00:39:44,080
Speaker 1: a lot to people. You get to find that out

626
00:39:44,120 --> 00:39:46,480
Speaker 1: through them getting the books in their hands, and it's

627
00:39:46,520 --> 00:39:51,200
Speaker 1: been really really exciting to see that. I always wonder,

628
00:39:51,520 --> 00:39:55,880
Speaker 1: I know, Tanya is like always in in the process

629
00:39:56,040 --> 00:40:00,320
Speaker 1: or working on eventually writing a book, or you write

630
00:40:00,440 --> 00:40:05,440
Speaker 1: almost of my proposal. Yeah, that's the hardest part, boy,

631
00:40:05,560 --> 00:40:10,520
Speaker 1: is it? It is? Did you feel when you turn,

632
00:40:10,719 --> 00:40:13,120
Speaker 1: like when you submitted it as the final draft, like

633
00:40:13,200 --> 00:40:15,319
Speaker 1: you're done, you cann't make any edits. Was there this

634
00:40:15,480 --> 00:40:22,919
Speaker 1: sense of relief or was it a sense of anxiety? Anxiety? Um,

635
00:40:23,000 --> 00:40:26,600
Speaker 1: because we had had Let's see, there's so there's really

636
00:40:26,640 --> 00:40:29,560
Speaker 1: like a lot of different rounds, and what you're allowed

637
00:40:29,600 --> 00:40:32,479
Speaker 1: to change get smaller and smaller as the drafts get,

638
00:40:32,719 --> 00:40:35,560
Speaker 1: you know, further down the line. So by the end

639
00:40:35,600 --> 00:40:38,719
Speaker 1: you can only make really minor adjustments like spell check

640
00:40:38,920 --> 00:40:44,480
Speaker 1: or punctuation um. And so I remember reading through the

641
00:40:44,480 --> 00:40:47,279
Speaker 1: final draft knowing that no major changes could be made,

642
00:40:47,400 --> 00:40:50,560
Speaker 1: but still being like, oh, I should have changed this

643
00:40:50,600 --> 00:40:53,080
Speaker 1: thing and I can't. And then you know you just

644
00:40:53,120 --> 00:40:55,600
Speaker 1: have to like throw it, throw caution to the wind

645
00:40:55,680 --> 00:40:57,960
Speaker 1: and say like it is what it is, It's frozen

646
00:40:58,000 --> 00:41:00,919
Speaker 1: in time, which is the whole reason behind not wanting

647
00:41:00,920 --> 00:41:02,480
Speaker 1: to write the book for me in the first place

648
00:41:02,520 --> 00:41:06,200
Speaker 1: is because I feel like with podcasting, you change and

649
00:41:06,200 --> 00:41:08,960
Speaker 1: you have a story continues. Yeah, the story continues, and

650
00:41:09,000 --> 00:41:11,719
Speaker 1: you're a work in progress. And nobody knows that has

651
00:41:11,800 --> 00:41:15,319
Speaker 1: learned that better than us, especially this week, that we're

652
00:41:15,440 --> 00:41:18,279
Speaker 1: always changing, we're always evolving, we're always trying to learn,

653
00:41:18,400 --> 00:41:21,239
Speaker 1: and you know, the book is frozen in time, so

654
00:41:21,440 --> 00:41:29,160
Speaker 1: we just hope it sticks, you know, holds up. I

655
00:41:29,280 --> 00:41:31,640
Speaker 1: never realized. I mean, I feel the exact same way

656
00:41:31,640 --> 00:41:35,880
Speaker 1: because it's like I'm making changes literally daily, and I'm like,

657
00:41:35,960 --> 00:41:38,200
Speaker 1: but my I was like, there's no there's no changing.

658
00:41:38,239 --> 00:41:40,200
Speaker 1: This is the that is what it is, you know.

659
00:41:40,280 --> 00:41:43,160
Speaker 1: But I find myself overthinking, which is something that I

660
00:41:43,280 --> 00:41:47,960
Speaker 1: never used to do. UM. So I can empathize with

661
00:41:47,960 --> 00:41:49,680
Speaker 1: you on that, but I really I want to touch on,

662
00:41:49,960 --> 00:41:54,120
Speaker 1: UM how we talked about evolving and changing, because um,

663
00:41:54,200 --> 00:41:58,040
Speaker 1: you Jack Bannick and Kelty Night, the Lady Gang. You

664
00:41:58,080 --> 00:42:03,040
Speaker 1: guys all posted this UM this post on Instagram like

665
00:42:03,120 --> 00:42:06,160
Speaker 1: kind of it was all the same time. Yeah, yeah,

666
00:42:06,320 --> 00:42:08,160
Speaker 1: like in unity. It was a statement that you and

667
00:42:08,200 --> 00:42:10,920
Speaker 1: I don't want to read the full statement, but um,

668
00:42:10,960 --> 00:42:13,120
Speaker 1: you basically said, we want to start this post off

669
00:42:13,120 --> 00:42:15,759
Speaker 1: by saying this, we messed up and we're sorry. We

670
00:42:15,800 --> 00:42:17,840
Speaker 1: started this brand five years ago with the mission of

671
00:42:17,960 --> 00:42:20,879
Speaker 1: uniting women, with the mission of uniting all women. We've

672
00:42:20,920 --> 00:42:24,399
Speaker 1: talked to talk, but embarrassing, embarrassingly, we haven't always walked

673
00:42:24,400 --> 00:42:26,480
Speaker 1: the walk. In the past. We always shied away from

674
00:42:26,480 --> 00:42:29,560
Speaker 1: having tough conversations and fear of saying the wrong thing.

675
00:42:29,680 --> 00:42:32,239
Speaker 1: But we now realize that our listeners on this, that

676
00:42:32,280 --> 00:42:34,480
Speaker 1: our silence on this issue was a major part of

677
00:42:34,480 --> 00:42:37,760
Speaker 1: the problem. Moving forward, we promised to use our platform

678
00:42:37,840 --> 00:42:41,160
Speaker 1: to be better, to to speak better, to represent better,

679
00:42:41,200 --> 00:42:44,160
Speaker 1: and to educate ourselves and others better, and to do better.

680
00:42:44,920 --> 00:42:48,720
Speaker 1: And this really resonated with me because I think that

681
00:42:50,000 --> 00:42:53,919
Speaker 1: for so long, you know, I I'm aware of what's

682
00:42:53,920 --> 00:42:57,239
Speaker 1: going on, and I've prided myself and being educated and

683
00:42:57,280 --> 00:43:00,400
Speaker 1: reading about, you know, what's going on in the country

684
00:43:00,400 --> 00:43:02,960
Speaker 1: and in history. Um and in my mind I've always

685
00:43:03,080 --> 00:43:06,360
Speaker 1: been like, I'm not racist, you know, like I don't

686
00:43:07,360 --> 00:43:10,400
Speaker 1: see color. I think we should all, you know, I

687
00:43:10,719 --> 00:43:12,920
Speaker 1: do realize it exists, but I think that part of

688
00:43:12,960 --> 00:43:15,959
Speaker 1: the problem with me as well is like I haven't

689
00:43:15,960 --> 00:43:19,240
Speaker 1: been speaking up or doing anything. I've just been like, well,

690
00:43:19,280 --> 00:43:22,040
Speaker 1: I'm not you know, I'm not racist, and I'm doing

691
00:43:22,040 --> 00:43:24,120
Speaker 1: my part by being kind and you know, wanting to

692
00:43:24,560 --> 00:43:27,400
Speaker 1: treat everybody equally. But that's not enough anymore. And so

693
00:43:27,440 --> 00:43:29,040
Speaker 1: when I saw you guys post this, it really like

694
00:43:29,120 --> 00:43:33,680
Speaker 1: kind of struck a chord with me because it's very true.

695
00:43:34,800 --> 00:43:38,080
Speaker 1: And the more that we educate ourselves in this whole

696
00:43:38,080 --> 00:43:41,120
Speaker 1: topic of race, you know, the more that we realized

697
00:43:41,120 --> 00:43:44,080
Speaker 1: how much we've screwed up, because you know a lot

698
00:43:44,120 --> 00:43:47,080
Speaker 1: of us had the same mentality in the past of

699
00:43:47,200 --> 00:43:50,200
Speaker 1: if you don't you shouldn't acknowledge it because that makes

700
00:43:50,239 --> 00:43:53,840
Speaker 1: you racist. So by but by doing that, we've learned

701
00:43:53,880 --> 00:43:59,839
Speaker 1: it's denying our black community their reality. And so you know,

702
00:44:00,160 --> 00:44:02,560
Speaker 1: we have to shift our focus of we don't see

703
00:44:02,640 --> 00:44:06,480
Speaker 1: color too. We see color, We see you, and we

704
00:44:06,560 --> 00:44:09,200
Speaker 1: hold space for you and we want to be your allies.

705
00:44:09,239 --> 00:44:13,759
Speaker 1: And I think that what prompted that um Instagram was

706
00:44:13,800 --> 00:44:16,080
Speaker 1: obviously the time that we're in right now, but also

707
00:44:16,239 --> 00:44:20,040
Speaker 1: because we started this podcast five years ago and the

708
00:44:20,040 --> 00:44:26,640
Speaker 1: whole um you know, landscape of the world. UM, it

709
00:44:26,719 --> 00:44:29,279
Speaker 1: was a different time, you know, and UM not to

710
00:44:29,360 --> 00:44:32,919
Speaker 1: say that hasn't been happening forever, but I'm saying that.

711
00:44:33,480 --> 00:44:35,840
Speaker 1: You know, it was a different time and we felt

712
00:44:35,880 --> 00:44:39,920
Speaker 1: like our mission in uniting women was to shy away

713
00:44:39,960 --> 00:44:43,680
Speaker 1: from tough conversations, and we always said no politics, no religion,

714
00:44:44,480 --> 00:44:47,279
Speaker 1: and so everything kind of got clumped together in a

715
00:44:47,320 --> 00:44:51,000
Speaker 1: group as just let's just overall say no tough conversations.

716
00:44:51,640 --> 00:44:55,560
Speaker 1: And we realized now that times have changed and we

717
00:44:55,640 --> 00:44:58,120
Speaker 1: have a much bigger platform than we ever thought we

718
00:44:58,120 --> 00:45:01,239
Speaker 1: would ever ever ever have, and we're so grateful for it,

719
00:45:01,280 --> 00:45:05,680
Speaker 1: but we have a responsibility to, you know, have tough

720
00:45:05,760 --> 00:45:11,680
Speaker 1: conversations because otherwise it is a complete disservice to our

721
00:45:11,760 --> 00:45:15,200
Speaker 1: Lady Gain community as a whole. And so um, we

722
00:45:15,200 --> 00:45:18,240
Speaker 1: weren't exactly uniting all women. We were ignoring a huge

723
00:45:18,440 --> 00:45:20,880
Speaker 1: percentage of the women that are in our community and

724
00:45:20,880 --> 00:45:24,640
Speaker 1: what they face on a daily basis. So um, you know,

725
00:45:24,719 --> 00:45:27,319
Speaker 1: it's just we had to admit we screwed up, you know,

726
00:45:27,440 --> 00:45:29,919
Speaker 1: and we're learning and we hope that they can stick

727
00:45:30,000 --> 00:45:32,120
Speaker 1: with us, and if they have, if they're fed up

728
00:45:32,120 --> 00:45:34,440
Speaker 1: with us, and they already kind of We've found that

729
00:45:34,480 --> 00:45:36,919
Speaker 1: a lot of these girls reached out and they said

730
00:45:36,920 --> 00:45:39,520
Speaker 1: they stopped listening because they felt like we were tone

731
00:45:39,560 --> 00:45:42,239
Speaker 1: deaf to what was happening in the country and in

732
00:45:42,280 --> 00:45:46,319
Speaker 1: the world, and that was a huge you know, that

733
00:45:46,400 --> 00:45:48,680
Speaker 1: was a big dose of reality for us, like we

734
00:45:48,719 --> 00:45:50,640
Speaker 1: have a job to do, and we don't blame those

735
00:45:50,680 --> 00:45:53,000
Speaker 1: girls for checking out because they wanted to talk about

736
00:45:53,000 --> 00:45:55,799
Speaker 1: things other than the things that we were talking about

737
00:45:55,800 --> 00:46:00,759
Speaker 1: on the podcast. Yeah. It's so funny because I have

738
00:46:01,000 --> 00:46:06,480
Speaker 1: always just assumed like staying silent meant keeping the peace,

739
00:46:07,480 --> 00:46:11,040
Speaker 1: and it's like, we're kind of it's not. When you

740
00:46:11,200 --> 00:46:14,279
Speaker 1: when you're staying silent on topics like this and things

741
00:46:14,320 --> 00:46:18,920
Speaker 1: that are important, where more voices mean growth and progress,

742
00:46:19,719 --> 00:46:22,080
Speaker 1: you're just being a part of the problem by staying silent.

743
00:46:22,160 --> 00:46:24,920
Speaker 1: When I thought I was avoiding the problem by staying silent,

744
00:46:25,000 --> 00:46:29,120
Speaker 1: And I think, um, I think you read you mentioned

745
00:46:29,320 --> 00:46:32,360
Speaker 1: did you read Untamed by Glennon Doyle. She has a

746
00:46:32,400 --> 00:46:35,960
Speaker 1: section where she talks about how she was so defensive

747
00:46:35,960 --> 00:46:39,160
Speaker 1: about racism that she wasn't racist, she loved everyone. And

748
00:46:39,680 --> 00:46:42,480
Speaker 1: it was such an eye opener for me of realizing

749
00:46:42,520 --> 00:46:47,239
Speaker 1: that where we might not be born with like racism,

750
00:46:47,440 --> 00:46:53,160
Speaker 1: but we're very quickly taught like that. That how society

751
00:46:53,280 --> 00:46:57,160
Speaker 1: views the black community versus the white community, and I

752
00:46:57,200 --> 00:47:01,000
Speaker 1: think to ignore that and to not acknowledge it just

753
00:47:01,080 --> 00:47:04,319
Speaker 1: because you love everyone like we all have it and

754
00:47:04,360 --> 00:47:07,360
Speaker 1: it's something to acknowledge and to speak up about because

755
00:47:08,320 --> 00:47:12,319
Speaker 1: I've I'm like you, I always wanted this podcast to

756
00:47:12,360 --> 00:47:14,600
Speaker 1: be a happy place and to not talk about things

757
00:47:14,680 --> 00:47:19,600
Speaker 1: that may cause confrontation or split people apart. But if anything,

758
00:47:19,840 --> 00:47:22,239
Speaker 1: I feel like we've had people come together more than

759
00:47:22,280 --> 00:47:27,319
Speaker 1: ever because people are taking a stance and standing up

760
00:47:27,400 --> 00:47:31,680
Speaker 1: for an unlikelike politics, This isn't political. This is this

761
00:47:31,760 --> 00:47:35,840
Speaker 1: is talking about the equity of humans and um, you know,

762
00:47:36,000 --> 00:47:40,160
Speaker 1: social justice. And I think that we've also been really

763
00:47:40,160 --> 00:47:44,520
Speaker 1: programmed to think that that you have to choose a

764
00:47:44,600 --> 00:47:47,640
Speaker 1: side politically, you know, as far as how you feel

765
00:47:47,640 --> 00:47:52,759
Speaker 1: on those issues. And that's complete bs. You know, this

766
00:47:52,840 --> 00:47:56,360
Speaker 1: is not politics. This is humans. Granted, politics plays a

767
00:47:56,400 --> 00:48:00,640
Speaker 1: major part in the you know, systematic issue of racism

768
00:48:00,640 --> 00:48:05,440
Speaker 1: in our country. Um, but yeah, it's like we felt

769
00:48:05,480 --> 00:48:09,200
Speaker 1: so silly for lumping it together into a group like that,

770
00:48:09,280 --> 00:48:13,759
Speaker 1: and we're just like so sorry for not taking the

771
00:48:13,800 --> 00:48:16,399
Speaker 1: step back and realizing that there's such a difference. It's

772
00:48:16,440 --> 00:48:19,000
Speaker 1: not a polarizing issue if it is and you're on

773
00:48:19,040 --> 00:48:21,319
Speaker 1: the other side of it, like we don't even want

774
00:48:21,320 --> 00:48:25,040
Speaker 1: to have you listening. I don't even want you here. Yeah,

775
00:48:25,080 --> 00:48:28,120
Speaker 1: but I also think acknowledging the fact that like sometimes

776
00:48:28,320 --> 00:48:30,960
Speaker 1: you know, like I think for me with everything, that's

777
00:48:31,200 --> 00:48:34,839
Speaker 1: it's weird because you know, I do feel like I've

778
00:48:34,880 --> 00:48:40,480
Speaker 1: I've had these feelings and you know, um uh, but

779
00:48:40,520 --> 00:48:42,279
Speaker 1: it's almost like you don't because because I am a

780
00:48:42,280 --> 00:48:45,680
Speaker 1: white woman, I don't know I will never know how

781
00:48:45,840 --> 00:48:47,839
Speaker 1: the black community feels. You know. It's like I know

782
00:48:47,880 --> 00:48:49,759
Speaker 1: how I feel when I see these videos and it's

783
00:48:50,080 --> 00:48:56,000
Speaker 1: disgusting and and and horrible, horrible and inhumane. Um and

784
00:48:56,280 --> 00:48:59,279
Speaker 1: it's like I almost don't know what to do. You know.

785
00:48:59,360 --> 00:49:03,680
Speaker 1: It's like my first reaction is like pray and be kind,

786
00:49:03,800 --> 00:49:06,720
Speaker 1: but it's like that's not that's not good enough anymore.

787
00:49:06,719 --> 00:49:08,319
Speaker 1: And you know, I mean it's never was never good enough.

788
00:49:08,360 --> 00:49:10,040
Speaker 1: But like for me, I was like, oh, this is

789
00:49:10,160 --> 00:49:12,040
Speaker 1: this is what I can do. But it's like I

790
00:49:12,080 --> 00:49:14,160
Speaker 1: think just saying I don't know what to do and

791
00:49:14,200 --> 00:49:18,480
Speaker 1: trying to figure that out and educating myself, is is

792
00:49:18,520 --> 00:49:20,640
Speaker 1: there a step in the right direction. Yeah, And we

793
00:49:20,680 --> 00:49:23,000
Speaker 1: had a conversation amongst the three of us, like what

794
00:49:23,120 --> 00:49:25,240
Speaker 1: are the things that we can do to start walking

795
00:49:25,239 --> 00:49:27,319
Speaker 1: the walk? And you know, a couple of things are

796
00:49:28,280 --> 00:49:33,000
Speaker 1: educating our white community and the Lady Gang first and foremost,

797
00:49:33,360 --> 00:49:35,880
Speaker 1: and that was you know, we're getting together, we're reading

798
00:49:35,920 --> 00:49:38,120
Speaker 1: the same book together that deals with this, and we're

799
00:49:38,160 --> 00:49:41,240
Speaker 1: having a discussion on the podcast and bringing in under

800
00:49:41,280 --> 00:49:45,400
Speaker 1: the Lady Gang network. We have another podcast called The Stacks. Um, Yeah,

801
00:49:45,560 --> 00:49:51,200
Speaker 1: with our friend Tracy Thomas, who is this incredibly powerful, beautiful,

802
00:49:51,760 --> 00:49:54,919
Speaker 1: outspoken black woman who really just is going to come

803
00:49:54,920 --> 00:49:57,840
Speaker 1: on and like we're gonna we're gonna have the dialogue

804
00:49:57,840 --> 00:50:01,120
Speaker 1: because it's it's an important thing to do, so educating

805
00:50:01,160 --> 00:50:05,360
Speaker 1: the listeners not shying away from it. And also, um,

806
00:50:05,400 --> 00:50:09,440
Speaker 1: you know, monetarily, like you know, we're so lucky that

807
00:50:09,480 --> 00:50:11,239
Speaker 1: we get to make money doing what we do for

808
00:50:11,239 --> 00:50:14,040
Speaker 1: a living, but we have responsibility to do something good

809
00:50:14,040 --> 00:50:17,360
Speaker 1: with some of that money. So you know, we're going

810
00:50:17,440 --> 00:50:20,560
Speaker 1: to be donating it to a number of organizations that

811
00:50:20,600 --> 00:50:22,680
Speaker 1: we posted about, and we're also going to be featuring

812
00:50:22,920 --> 00:50:26,759
Speaker 1: more diverse guests on the podcast. And it's you know,

813
00:50:26,800 --> 00:50:29,520
Speaker 1: we've tried since the beginning to do that, I'm sure

814
00:50:29,560 --> 00:50:33,239
Speaker 1: like you guys, UM, and so we're just going to

815
00:50:33,400 --> 00:50:36,839
Speaker 1: keep up, you know, keep up asking and hoping that

816
00:50:36,880 --> 00:50:40,279
Speaker 1: we can change the landscape of that too, UM and

817
00:50:40,719 --> 00:50:45,200
Speaker 1: featuring women Black women who are in business and business

818
00:50:45,200 --> 00:50:48,280
Speaker 1: owners and featuring them on the podcast and doing stuff

819
00:50:48,320 --> 00:50:51,680
Speaker 1: like that where it's you know, should have been automatic,

820
00:50:51,760 --> 00:50:54,719
Speaker 1: which is so embarrassing that you know it's taken this

821
00:50:55,040 --> 00:50:57,799
Speaker 1: for us to um step up. But it's like it's

822
00:50:57,840 --> 00:51:01,040
Speaker 1: even like we just had uh Nina Parker on a

823
00:51:01,080 --> 00:51:03,760
Speaker 1: few weeks ago, and you know, we have a normal,

824
00:51:03,880 --> 00:51:07,880
Speaker 1: just conversation about like life, love, career, the pursuit of happiness,

825
00:51:08,040 --> 00:51:11,600
Speaker 1: and we don't ask her, you know, any tough questions

826
00:51:11,640 --> 00:51:14,399
Speaker 1: about the black community and what she's had to face,

827
00:51:15,000 --> 00:51:17,520
Speaker 1: you know, in terms of race in her career or

828
00:51:17,560 --> 00:51:19,200
Speaker 1: in her life. And you know, it's like it's having

829
00:51:19,280 --> 00:51:22,440
Speaker 1: those conversations that I think I didn't really register with

830
00:51:22,480 --> 00:51:24,880
Speaker 1: me because for me, yeah, I don't see color, but

831
00:51:24,880 --> 00:51:29,520
Speaker 1: it's true, it is there, you know, So they're having it. Yeah,

832
00:51:29,600 --> 00:51:31,040
Speaker 1: because I was like, well, you know, I was watching

833
00:51:31,040 --> 00:51:35,000
Speaker 1: her talk UM this morning and like she was, you know,

834
00:51:35,120 --> 00:51:37,799
Speaker 1: in tears over everything that's going on. And rightfully so.

835
00:51:37,880 --> 00:51:40,359
Speaker 1: And it's just like I feel bad because not only

836
00:51:40,400 --> 00:51:42,080
Speaker 1: did we have her as a guest recently, but it's like,

837
00:51:42,120 --> 00:51:43,960
Speaker 1: I consider, you know, a colleague, I've worked with her

838
00:51:43,960 --> 00:51:46,920
Speaker 1: a bunch, and I I I've never asked her these

839
00:51:47,000 --> 00:51:51,279
Speaker 1: questions and never have you know, UM understood that that

840
00:51:51,440 --> 00:51:54,120
Speaker 1: side of her, and I feel embarrassed about it, to

841
00:51:54,120 --> 00:51:58,480
Speaker 1: be honest, I think there I I think we all

842
00:51:58,640 --> 00:52:02,960
Speaker 1: feel the same way of how we've you know, handled

843
00:52:02,960 --> 00:52:05,120
Speaker 1: things in the past. But I think this is such

844
00:52:05,160 --> 00:52:07,920
Speaker 1: a great time for growth and moving forward and making

845
00:52:07,920 --> 00:52:11,280
Speaker 1: sure that we are moving forward and continuing this beyond

846
00:52:12,719 --> 00:52:18,200
Speaker 1: what's happening right now. I think knowing, you know, being

847
00:52:18,239 --> 00:52:21,000
Speaker 1: able to move forward and correct what we've done wrong,

848
00:52:21,080 --> 00:52:23,680
Speaker 1: Like we're so lucky to be in a position where

849
00:52:24,440 --> 00:52:27,719
Speaker 1: we can fix what we've done and do better. You know.

850
00:52:27,800 --> 00:52:31,560
Speaker 1: It's I I've been what you know, I've been trying to.

851
00:52:31,920 --> 00:52:37,319
Speaker 1: I watched the documentary thirteen plast Night and so eye opening,

852
00:52:37,600 --> 00:52:42,000
Speaker 1: and like I felt, I felt like I had so

853
00:52:42,080 --> 00:52:44,359
Speaker 1: much more of an understanding of what's happening right now

854
00:52:44,440 --> 00:52:46,960
Speaker 1: just based on this like hour and a half documentary,

855
00:52:47,080 --> 00:52:49,319
Speaker 1: and in my head, I was thinking there's so much

856
00:52:49,360 --> 00:52:52,359
Speaker 1: more to learn. But how lucky are we to be

857
00:52:52,440 --> 00:52:57,400
Speaker 1: on this side of growth and progress and doing better

858
00:52:57,480 --> 00:53:03,399
Speaker 1: moving forward beyond just what's happening currently. Yeah, it's true.

859
00:53:03,440 --> 00:53:07,640
Speaker 1: And also, you know, it's I feel fortunate that we

860
00:53:07,719 --> 00:53:11,279
Speaker 1: have these platforms and these communities of women who I'm

861
00:53:11,360 --> 00:53:18,480
Speaker 1: finding more and more are like so willing to adjust

862
00:53:18,640 --> 00:53:23,200
Speaker 1: and change and grow and learn. And UM, that's just

863
00:53:23,280 --> 00:53:25,600
Speaker 1: been it's been really lovely to see. And if we

864
00:53:25,680 --> 00:53:28,680
Speaker 1: can take you know, a hundred girls from our Facebook

865
00:53:28,719 --> 00:53:31,080
Speaker 1: group and get them to read this one book and

866
00:53:31,360 --> 00:53:34,399
Speaker 1: you know, join in on an important conversation, then those

867
00:53:34,440 --> 00:53:37,279
Speaker 1: people tell the people in their lives, like, you know,

868
00:53:37,400 --> 00:53:41,440
Speaker 1: I just want to be a vessel for positive change

869
00:53:41,520 --> 00:53:47,160
Speaker 1: and growth in this entire this entire thing. Yeah, woke nation,

870
00:53:47,320 --> 00:53:51,560
Speaker 1: you know, woke nation. You know it's it's it's a

871
00:53:51,640 --> 00:53:55,040
Speaker 1: it's a good time to have a podcast because you know,

872
00:53:55,160 --> 00:53:59,560
Speaker 1: we get to do the work in front of the world. Yeah, no,

873
00:53:59,719 --> 00:54:03,239
Speaker 1: total least at an example, MHM, can you share what

874
00:54:03,239 --> 00:54:05,480
Speaker 1: book y'all are reading for a Lady gang so that

875
00:54:05,520 --> 00:54:11,879
Speaker 1: people can Yes, it's called White Fragility. Um. This book

876
00:54:11,920 --> 00:54:15,320
Speaker 1: was recommended to me. UM the author's name is uh

877
00:54:15,440 --> 00:54:17,840
Speaker 1: Diana or Diana D'Angelo. Let me like, let me just

878
00:54:17,880 --> 00:54:21,600
Speaker 1: make sure, oh, Robin D'Angelo. So it's White Fragility by

879
00:54:21,719 --> 00:54:27,040
Speaker 1: Robin D'Angelo. Um, and it really is. It's been recommended

880
00:54:27,080 --> 00:54:30,600
Speaker 1: to me by so so so many people, and it

881
00:54:30,719 --> 00:54:36,880
Speaker 1: really is the perfect thing at the moment for any

882
00:54:36,920 --> 00:54:40,600
Speaker 1: white person to read. Um, it's sort of it tells

883
00:54:40,640 --> 00:54:43,640
Speaker 1: us what we've been doing wrong this entire time, you know.

884
00:54:44,400 --> 00:54:48,560
Speaker 1: And um, it's just it's it's really good. It's really

885
00:54:48,560 --> 00:54:53,440
Speaker 1: a great resource for anybody who's confused or needs to know.

886
00:54:54,000 --> 00:54:56,560
Speaker 1: You know, I don't know how to really word this.

887
00:54:57,840 --> 00:55:02,720
Speaker 1: It's just a great resource. Yeah, I UM, someone posted

888
00:55:02,800 --> 00:55:05,960
Speaker 1: you know, as you're learning and educating yourself, like be

889
00:55:06,120 --> 00:55:12,520
Speaker 1: prepared to be comfortable feeling uncomfortable, which I have felt,

890
00:55:13,000 --> 00:55:17,600
Speaker 1: you know, immensely, because it's like realizing something that you've

891
00:55:17,640 --> 00:55:22,360
Speaker 1: lived with your whole life without recognizing it or um,

892
00:55:23,600 --> 00:55:27,520
Speaker 1: like I guess admitting to it or acknowledging it is

893
00:55:27,719 --> 00:55:33,200
Speaker 1: a very uncomfortable thing to you know process. But it's

894
00:55:33,239 --> 00:55:37,040
Speaker 1: a weird sense of like growth that comes with that

895
00:55:37,120 --> 00:55:41,680
Speaker 1: feeling of discomfort that I'm learning. So yeah, I'm reading

896
00:55:41,680 --> 00:55:44,440
Speaker 1: it too. I just started it, so it's um. I

897
00:55:44,480 --> 00:55:46,600
Speaker 1: have a list of books that I'm going through and

898
00:55:46,600 --> 00:55:49,080
Speaker 1: I have to remind myself that I can only read

899
00:55:49,120 --> 00:55:53,160
Speaker 1: one book at a time totally. That one's a good one.

900
00:55:53,200 --> 00:55:56,480
Speaker 1: I'm doing the audio book on that one one, White Fragility,

901
00:55:56,480 --> 00:55:58,480
Speaker 1: and I like, just go for walks and I'll listen.

902
00:55:58,520 --> 00:56:02,279
Speaker 1: And it's so true being comfortable with the discomfort. Like

903
00:56:03,480 --> 00:56:05,960
Speaker 1: there's things that in the past, you know, if we

904
00:56:06,080 --> 00:56:10,440
Speaker 1: got feedback, we would try to be defensive and learning

905
00:56:10,440 --> 00:56:14,279
Speaker 1: that that is not at all our place, and it's

906
00:56:14,360 --> 00:56:18,480
Speaker 1: just to simply take the feedback and let it sink

907
00:56:18,520 --> 00:56:22,759
Speaker 1: in and then move forward and acknowledge the feedback and

908
00:56:22,920 --> 00:56:26,799
Speaker 1: be appreciative for the feedback. And I think that more

909
00:56:26,840 --> 00:56:30,280
Speaker 1: and more during this time. You know, everybody, thank Goodness

910
00:56:30,360 --> 00:56:33,520
Speaker 1: in our community is really outspoken, and so more and

911
00:56:33,560 --> 00:56:36,879
Speaker 1: more I'm getting to practice that by being like, you're

912
00:56:36,920 --> 00:56:39,600
Speaker 1: absolutely right, we don't have enough diversity in our guests

913
00:56:39,640 --> 00:56:42,000
Speaker 1: that come on the podcast. You're absolutely right, we don't

914
00:56:42,000 --> 00:56:45,239
Speaker 1: do a good enough job of supporting black owned businesses

915
00:56:45,320 --> 00:56:48,480
Speaker 1: like we you know, it's just it doesn't matter what

916
00:56:48,560 --> 00:56:51,759
Speaker 1: the excuses are. It's it's it's not the right thing

917
00:56:51,800 --> 00:56:55,319
Speaker 1: to defend it. You just adjust, you pivot and you

918
00:56:55,000 --> 00:56:58,960
Speaker 1: you you do, you start doing it. Well. Thank you

919
00:56:59,040 --> 00:57:02,240
Speaker 1: for coming on. I know it's like a time where weish,

920
00:57:02,520 --> 00:57:04,080
Speaker 1: you know. I'm glad that we got to have a

921
00:57:04,120 --> 00:57:06,719
Speaker 1: conversation about what's going on. I'm really excited for you

922
00:57:06,760 --> 00:57:10,600
Speaker 1: all about act like a lady. Thank you. Definitely on

923
00:57:10,719 --> 00:57:13,160
Speaker 1: my list to read. You have it right here. You

924
00:57:13,160 --> 00:57:15,400
Speaker 1: can put it at the bottom after the important books.

925
00:57:16,640 --> 00:57:18,600
Speaker 1: I can, you know, I can read some and then

926
00:57:18,640 --> 00:57:21,560
Speaker 1: read something als. But I love the photo on the back.

927
00:57:21,680 --> 00:57:24,240
Speaker 1: It's so cute and fun. I just love y'all. I'm

928
00:57:24,480 --> 00:57:27,960
Speaker 1: proud to know y'all and proud to get to be

929
00:57:28,040 --> 00:57:31,000
Speaker 1: in a community with you. Also the same, Thank you

930
00:57:31,040 --> 00:57:34,360
Speaker 1: guys so much. Yeah, super happy to support. Let's get

931
00:57:34,360 --> 00:57:36,600
Speaker 1: you guys on the New York Times bestseller list. Okay,

932
00:57:36,920 --> 00:57:46,480
Speaker 1: love you, love you alright, I do love me some

933
00:57:46,600 --> 00:57:51,320
Speaker 1: beca Tobin. It's um just one of those things that

934
00:57:52,280 --> 00:57:55,040
Speaker 1: I like, you know, obviously coming out with the book

935
00:57:55,080 --> 00:57:58,800
Speaker 1: is such a huge accomplishment and having you know that

936
00:57:59,040 --> 00:58:01,840
Speaker 1: during something like this, the press and the excitement, but

937
00:58:02,720 --> 00:58:06,120
Speaker 1: it's cool that someone with her, you know, with that

938
00:58:06,240 --> 00:58:10,680
Speaker 1: excitement that platform is having conversations about what's happening now,

939
00:58:10,760 --> 00:58:13,120
Speaker 1: So I love her well yeah, and I also think

940
00:58:13,160 --> 00:58:19,120
Speaker 1: it's easy for people to to turn a you know,

941
00:58:19,240 --> 00:58:21,160
Speaker 1: turn a blind eye to what's going on and just

942
00:58:21,200 --> 00:58:22,520
Speaker 1: like want to be like, you know, I put so

943
00:58:22,600 --> 00:58:24,480
Speaker 1: much effort into this book and I'm going to promote it,

944
00:58:24,520 --> 00:58:27,320
Speaker 1: and you know there's still people posting like here's my

945
00:58:28,480 --> 00:58:31,040
Speaker 1: fit tummy t you know what I mean. Like, it's

946
00:58:31,080 --> 00:58:34,800
Speaker 1: just it's still happening. And I'm happy that the Lady

947
00:58:34,840 --> 00:58:39,280
Speaker 1: Gang beca Tobin on those girls have kind of realized like, no,

948
00:58:39,600 --> 00:58:42,120
Speaker 1: we're not going to be doing that. You know, it

949
00:58:42,200 --> 00:58:43,920
Speaker 1: is what it is. It's coming out. You know it's

950
00:58:43,960 --> 00:58:46,480
Speaker 1: coming out. But we understand what's going on, and we

951
00:58:46,520 --> 00:58:53,040
Speaker 1: want to like change the conversation to something bigger than us. Um,

952
00:58:53,120 --> 00:58:57,000
Speaker 1: we are not going to do emails today. We I

953
00:58:57,120 --> 00:59:01,000
Speaker 1: just wanted to reiterate some of those um sources that

954
00:59:02,360 --> 00:59:09,360
Speaker 1: Natalie shared earlier on Netflix. When they see us, um

955
00:59:09,400 --> 00:59:13,840
Speaker 1: seven seconds, um they hate you give. And then there

956
00:59:13,920 --> 00:59:17,919
Speaker 1: was a podcast Let's Talk about Racism, speaking of racing

957
00:59:18,200 --> 00:59:22,600
Speaker 1: racism and um, I'm reading as well as what Beca

958
00:59:22,640 --> 00:59:26,760
Speaker 1: Toba was talking about. I'm reading White White Fragility. Um,

959
00:59:26,880 --> 00:59:30,280
Speaker 1: I bought the book Just Mercy, which is also a movie,

960
00:59:30,440 --> 00:59:32,320
Speaker 1: and I'm going to watch this. It's yeah, the one

961
00:59:32,400 --> 00:59:36,120
Speaker 1: with them Michael Michael V. Jordan's Yeah yeah, And I

962
00:59:36,120 --> 00:59:40,520
Speaker 1: think it really focuses on the justice system. And um

963
00:59:40,600 --> 00:59:45,120
Speaker 1: so I would just recommend you can easily research movies

964
00:59:45,160 --> 00:59:47,520
Speaker 1: and books and sources to look at. So do that,

965
00:59:47,880 --> 00:59:50,840
Speaker 1: and you know, use your time to do it because

966
00:59:50,880 --> 00:59:54,320
Speaker 1: it's it's really eye opening once you start opening these

967
00:59:54,360 --> 00:59:59,320
Speaker 1: books and watching these shows that are hard to watch honestly. So, um, yeah,

968
00:59:59,400 --> 01:00:01,320
Speaker 1: I want to watch. There is a thirteen or thirteen.

969
01:00:01,400 --> 01:00:05,800
Speaker 1: I think it's thirteenth, the thirteenth Movement, but I've heard

970
01:00:05,840 --> 01:00:07,680
Speaker 1: a lot of people say thirteen, so I'm not sure,

971
01:00:07,720 --> 01:00:10,520
Speaker 1: but I think it's their team. I'm gonna watch that tonight.

972
01:00:11,160 --> 01:00:14,720
Speaker 1: But um, we love you all, and stay safe and

973
01:00:14,840 --> 01:00:20,600
Speaker 1: stay you know, stay strong, and what the conversation is

974
01:00:20,720 --> 01:00:24,840
Speaker 1: right now and what's right. This is not a political thing.

975
01:00:24,880 --> 01:00:29,520
Speaker 1: This is human rights and we love you all, and um,

976
01:00:29,680 --> 01:00:33,800
Speaker 1: be good to each other. I love you, I love you,

977
01:00:33,960 --> 01:00:35,880
Speaker 1: I love you too, I love you Mark, I love

978
01:00:35,920 --> 01:00:37,960
Speaker 1: you Easton, I love you Tori. Even though we can't

979
01:00:37,960 --> 01:00:44,080
Speaker 1: see you. I love you, guys. Bye,