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Speaker 1: Hey, hey, hey, we're back. We're black, We're brown and

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Speaker 1: abusion ambition, ambitition, ambition. Hey and Andrew, how are you girls?

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Speaker 2: Hi?

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Speaker 3: Gorgeous? Don't you know what your skin is looking? Glowy girl?

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Speaker 1: Because the beach said with browner than brown. I used

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Speaker 1: to hate getting dark in the summertime, but now I know.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I was a sad sad uh summertime in Georgia girl.

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Speaker 3: Like I I mean, I went to like majority white

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Speaker 3: schools and I was out there. I did not need

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Speaker 3: to be putting oil on myself and tanning spray. You know,

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Speaker 3: it was a struggle for me and my gay ex boyfriend,

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Speaker 3: myschool boyfriend. We would go tanning together.

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Speaker 1: Like was that not a clue?

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Speaker 3: There were so many And I always think about my

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Speaker 3: gay ex boyfriend in summertime. I don't know, just something

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Speaker 3: about it. I'm like, oh, man, we had fun, we

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Speaker 3: had fun, But how's your summer going? You guys just

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Speaker 3: wanted the beachy beach.

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Speaker 1: Yes, got a little brown. But truthfully, I was thinking about, like, okay,

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Speaker 1: like travel for a fall winter, because how far an

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Speaker 1: advance are supposed to buy a ticket? Like when isn't

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Speaker 1: there like an ideal.

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Speaker 3: Six weeks domestic, and I think for international, like eight

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Speaker 3: to twelve weeks is usually the rule of thumb, okay,

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Speaker 3: or you could be like me and buy tickets. I

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Speaker 3: just bought. I bought it. I bought flights to La

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Speaker 3: because I'm going to that conference that I wasn't sure

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Speaker 3: I was going to go to. I'm turning it into

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Speaker 3: a writer and a writering, a writing and a conference retreat.

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Speaker 3: So I got an airbnb, okay, and just for me,

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Speaker 3: and it has it's really cute. It's like, you know

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Speaker 3: how in La and Cali they have like the little

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Speaker 3: guest houses in the back. So I got this lady.

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Speaker 3: She has a guest house and it has its own

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Speaker 3: little pool, like okay, not a huge pool, but a

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Speaker 3: saltwater pool, and it looks really cute and tranquil with

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Speaker 3: trees and stuff. And so I'm gonna I'm heading there.

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Speaker 3: And yeah, the flights actually were really affordable, shock to four.

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Speaker 1: So so I.

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Speaker 3: Mean I had to book a bunch of one ways

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Speaker 3: because I'm dropping the kids off on the way to

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Speaker 3: calib Okay.

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Speaker 1: So you not you using the trade like the plane

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Speaker 1: like a bus.

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Speaker 3: No, but for real, like we're commuting. So I'm doing

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Speaker 3: a stopover in Saint Louis. The kids are getting dropped

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Speaker 3: off with my mom. I'm going to stay at the

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Speaker 3: airport catch my flight to LA from there. I want

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Speaker 3: to say it was less than three hundred dollars one

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Speaker 3: way ticket, so okay, and one way tickets are usually

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Speaker 3: more expensive. They don't like selling one way, yes, and

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Speaker 3: why did I do that because the lady at Southwest

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Speaker 3: told me to for some technical reasons because I'm dropping

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Speaker 3: with babies, so if she wanted them they have I

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Speaker 3: couldn't like make their separate reservation. This does not matter

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Speaker 3: to the listener. The point is I was surprise to

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Speaker 3: get like a decent priced flight to LA. Okay, yeah,

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Speaker 3: I'm excited. So, like you said, fall in winter travel,

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Speaker 3: I can't even think beyond like September first right now.

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Speaker 3: I'm just hanging on for dear life at this point

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Speaker 3: is how I feel? Are you actually planning?

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Speaker 1: I want still one for sure? Like so still my

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Speaker 1: best t get Bro is turning the big five zero.

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Speaker 3: Five, I know, fifty, I know wow, Okay.

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Speaker 1: Black, don't crack unless you do it, I'm saying no.

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Speaker 1: So he he's turning fifty and we're trying to He's

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Speaker 1: trying to figure out what he wanted to do. We're

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Speaker 1: both Libra's, so his birthdays in October. So he decided

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Speaker 1: on Bager's baby. Oh okay, and I said, okay, so

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Speaker 1: a group of us are gonna go, and so that's

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Speaker 1: like in October. But I am trying to plan to

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Speaker 1: start to create like a new because every Christmas I

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Speaker 1: get really sad, obviously because you're not here. And so

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Speaker 1: doctor Green, my therapist, suggested I create a new tradition.

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Speaker 1: And I said, you know, I'm never away for Christmas.

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Speaker 1: I'm always like, no, I have to be here my

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Speaker 1: family and my family. Meanwhile, last year my mom wasn't here,

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Speaker 1: and neither was my sister Lisa. And yet before that,

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Speaker 1: my sister Tracy wasn't here. Year before that, my sister care.

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Speaker 1: So I'm like Tiffany, you know, like it's okay if

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Speaker 1: you're not here, like sometimes you know, those who are

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Speaker 1: here get together and I'm thanksgiving it something we always

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Speaker 1: do together. So you know, I haven't decided, and I'm

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Speaker 1: almost positive. Alyssa said that she and her mom are

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Speaker 1: going to go someplace for Christmas. So I said, okay,

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Speaker 1: So I don't know where I'm going to go for Christmas,

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Speaker 1: but I feel like I'm feeling something warmish. I don't know,

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Speaker 1: I will see who's a belle because Cabral's already like,

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Speaker 1: I'm down to go. Where do you want to go?

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Speaker 3: You want a couple kids and me and my husband, So.

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Speaker 1: I'm trying to figure out I'm going to do. I'm

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Speaker 1: feeling something more warmish, you know.

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Speaker 3: Okay, I don't.

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Speaker 1: Know if it's'll be international maybe, so I'm kind of like,

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Speaker 1: you know, the for the listener, like, where's a great

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Speaker 1: place to go that's not going to be a freaking

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Speaker 1: arm and a lag, which I'm sure it's going to

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Speaker 1: be an armored like just because you know.

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Speaker 3: How well I have I have had these like moments

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Speaker 3: where I at this time of year, probably pre kids,

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Speaker 3: I tried to play in a Christmas trip, but I

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Speaker 3: usually get guilt tripped out of it by my own mother.

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Speaker 3: So put a pin in that, because I think what

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Speaker 3: you're doing is amazing and I think it is like

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Speaker 3: such a level that I want to get to where

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Speaker 3: we can just like start our own traditions. But while

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Speaker 3: these kids are small, they're like in demand there.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, they have to do.

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Speaker 3: Yes, it's really what I'm on. I'm on a child.

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Speaker 1: Tour of the I love that in demand.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, but I did make a shift this past year

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Speaker 3: to say, well, one I didn't couldn't really couldn't really

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Speaker 3: didn't really have a choice. I had so many, like

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Speaker 3: you know, family emergencies. We were always traveling with the kids,

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Speaker 3: but trying to make more visits throughout the year, so

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Speaker 3: there's not so much pressure on like these specific two

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Speaker 3: days Thanksgiving and Christmas, and you know, it's just so stressful.

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Speaker 3: No one's ever satisfied. Someone always gets the feeling hurt,

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Speaker 3: we're not there long enough. But yeah, I love that idea.

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Speaker 3: And I just wanted to say, in the past, when

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Speaker 3: I have looked at there are some epic places, like

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Speaker 3: vacationing on the holidays is for a lot of people normal.

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Speaker 3: There are some really epic places that you can go

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Speaker 3: in the holidays. But because it's not uncommon for like

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Speaker 3: holiday travel, you know abroad, especially in like warm beachy places,

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Speaker 3: they book up kind of quickly. Okay, yeah, go ahead

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Speaker 3: and start you know looking at way you won't.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm trying to think, I'm like, I've never do

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Speaker 1: you know I've never done a cruise never ever, ever

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Speaker 1: ever ever never have I ever, so I would like

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Speaker 1: to do at least one cruise. I mean, I don't

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Speaker 1: I'm not saying for Christmas, but these are some kind

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Speaker 1: of like upcoming things, even if it's just for a

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Speaker 1: few days, just because what if I hate it? But yeah,

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Speaker 1: I think you.

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Speaker 3: Want to look really carefully at the reviews, you know,

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Speaker 3: make sure it's like a there's probably like adults only ones.

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Speaker 3: Not that kids are the worst, but you don't want

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Speaker 3: to go to one of the ones where it's basically

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Speaker 3: an outdoor indoor water park for children and not relaxing.

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Speaker 1: Yes, one of my friends said, my very wealthy, wealthy,

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Speaker 1: wealthy friend he had went on the rich Carlton has

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Speaker 1: like this new fancy Smancy Smancy Smancy cruise and he

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Speaker 1: guess how much. I can't remember if it's a week

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Speaker 1: or two weeks whever, guess how much it costs rich

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Speaker 1: Carlton cruise. Let's just say it's two weeks. I don't

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Speaker 1: know how long it is. You will not you will not.

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Speaker 3: Believe figure girl. I yeah, okay, lay it on me.

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Speaker 1: Two hundred and I think forty five thousand dollars. Yes,

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Speaker 1: and he told me, babee, buy yourself a boat, I mean,

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Speaker 1: by yourself a house. Well he has a house, but

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Speaker 1: still I think the part that bothered me a little

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Speaker 1: bit hopefully he's not listening to this.

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Speaker 3: Well he don't be listening, but he was still listening.

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Speaker 3: He's like, I got it.

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Speaker 1: Well, the part that kind of black was like wait what?

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Speaker 1: He was like, yeah, you know, you know I treated

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Speaker 1: myself whatever. I said, Well, that was a big treat.

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Speaker 1: And he was like, yeah, I heard about it from

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Speaker 1: my pastor and his wife because they went on I'm like, wait,

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Speaker 1: what as.

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Speaker 3: People got rich pastors?

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Speaker 1: I say, Megachurch, is your pastor from Atlanta?

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Speaker 3: Good guess how do you.

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Speaker 1: Feel about that? When the pastor is we live in that.

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Speaker 1: There's a funny in me Instagram channel where it says

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Speaker 1: my pastor's watches and then there's like a pastor my

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Speaker 1: pastor sneakers, And they will show up one of these

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Speaker 1: famous pastors and then they'll say he's wearing a whatever

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Speaker 1: watch and that watches one hundred thousand dollars and he's

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Speaker 1: wearing such a such sneakers for fifteen hundred. How do

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Speaker 1: you feel about that. I was like, wait, your pastor

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Speaker 1: told you about a two hundred and fifty feels in

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Speaker 1: that La cruise.

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Speaker 3: I think that there is no that we all deserve

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Speaker 3: love from our heavenly Father and whoever you believe in

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Speaker 3: heavenly Mother. Yeah. I guess the way I feel about

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Speaker 3: it is like actions, and I have a lot of

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Speaker 3: conflict because I have been to those megachurches in Georgia,

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Speaker 3: but also I have been to like the down home

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Speaker 3: like southern Baptist churches like where my aunt and my

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Speaker 3: great uncle they're both pastors, and I think being humble

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Speaker 3: and humility is really important. I think it's sad that

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Speaker 3: those megachurches like they like I remember going to one

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Speaker 3: and they had like a special parking lot just for

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Speaker 3: the Falcons players because it was close to their training camp.

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Speaker 3: Kind of very best.

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Speaker 1: Parking lot because Yad said, there's v IP heaven't baby.

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Speaker 3: No but for real, no, but for real And yeah,

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Speaker 3: I just found it really like icky and it just Yeah,

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Speaker 3: the way I feel about it is like, you.

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Speaker 1: Know, I just I remember I was watching on Rich

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Speaker 1: Pastors and one of them said, let me tell you something, baby,

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Speaker 1: If Jesus was was around during these times. I promise

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Speaker 1: you he wouldn't be riding a donkey. I'm like, Sir,

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Speaker 1: I Jesus is like, how I get in it?

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Speaker 3: Would he be in a bugatti?

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Speaker 1: I mean because that that this I was watching this

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Speaker 1: documentary and that pastor had like three three private jets

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Speaker 1: one two three. I said, sir, I know there are

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Speaker 1: people in the congregation now who are hungry, who might

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Speaker 1: even be un housed. It's just like that's just the

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Speaker 1: makeup of you know. And I just don't understand how

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Speaker 1: you need unodos trace private antal planes and you know,

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Speaker 1: and then two hundred and fifty. So that's for one

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Speaker 1: person two fifty and maybe I don't know, let's just

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Speaker 1: pretend that for two people, maybe it's three fifty. I

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Speaker 1: don't know. But that you could literally buy a congregation

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Speaker 1: member home and transform their whole life. I just I'm

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Speaker 1: not here to judge, but I'm judging, you know.

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Speaker 3: On the one hand, I want to be like we

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Speaker 3: all are individuals. Do what you want. But I think

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Speaker 3: the position of being like a church leader, Yeah, you

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Speaker 3: put yourself on this pedestal, and it's like you do,

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Speaker 3: I think you get held to a much higher standard

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Speaker 3: I feel like we hold celebrities to a higher standard

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Speaker 3: than like our religious leaders sometimes in terms of like, oh,

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Speaker 3: you know that person who tracks Taylor's fwat's private jet

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Speaker 3: and how much jet fool she feels she's using. And

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Speaker 3: I'm like, but three for a pastor, like I do

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Speaker 3: think if I don't know, I wonder what his congregants think,

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Speaker 3: because I wouldn't feel comfortable.

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Speaker 1: Well, some people like a fancy like you know, pastor

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Speaker 1: in church. But I just I just brought that up

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Speaker 1: because as we're talking about travel and things like that,

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Speaker 1: and you think to yourself, like, I don't know, chall

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Speaker 1: this is why, you know, I just believed that, you know,

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Speaker 1: I go to God for myself, you know, because it's

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Speaker 1: just at the end of the day, that's just a man.

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Speaker 1: Oh man? Or were they then? And so they are

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Speaker 1: imperfect infallible, so therefore Yeah. But when he told me that,

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Speaker 1: because one, I was already like three fifty, I mean

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Speaker 1: two fifty Wow, how much what do you make of

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Speaker 1: last year? And he was like, yeah, my Fastor told

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Speaker 1: me about it. I said, like, because they had heard

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Speaker 1: through the grapevine. He's like, no, no, no, because him and

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Speaker 1: his wife they had done it and they're going to

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Speaker 1: do it again. I'm like, hey, that's a nice erna me.

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Speaker 1: You just have to do this now because you're like, wow, hey,

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Speaker 1: so I just I'd be really curious on that kind

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Speaker 1: of crew. Who what did it ever? I do for

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Speaker 1: a living, and I, on my Bengo card wouldn't have

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Speaker 1: been a pastor. You know.

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Speaker 3: State farm agents are small business owners too, so they

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Speaker 3: know how to help you choose personalized policies that fit

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Speaker 3: your needs, like a good neighbor state farm is there?

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Speaker 3: Talk to your local agent today. I mean, I just

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Speaker 3: think it depends on what kind of vacation you want,

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Speaker 3: because a cruise, a solo cruise, it's almost like you

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Speaker 3: expect to talk to other people and like meet other

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Speaker 3: people in chat chat and like is that the vibe

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Speaker 3: you want or do you want something more tranquil? And

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Speaker 3: I think, like, yeah, some visualization, like where do you

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Speaker 3: see yourself? Do you want to be alone? Do you

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Speaker 3: want to be with people? But I love that idea.

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Speaker 3: I aspire to get there. I don't think this year

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Speaker 3: is going to be the year, but I would love

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Speaker 3: to not have so much pressure around the holidays. Last year,

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Speaker 3: the holidays nearly broke me, and in fact, they really

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Speaker 3: did break me. I just didn't realize it until five

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Speaker 3: months later. Okay, yeah, just the Yeah, it's a lot

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Speaker 3: of pressure. But it's smart to think about it in advance,

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Speaker 3: I would say, and not to be like. If you

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Speaker 3: have a mom like mine, she's really trying to get

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Speaker 3: you to commit to some dates by about September. It's

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Speaker 3: like when the when the pumpkinspice latte comes out, which

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Speaker 3: is coming in like the next week or two, because

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Speaker 3: every year it gets earlier and earlier. Yeah, my mom

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Speaker 3: is like so and no pressure, but also lots of pressure.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: I just wanted to get some planning done. Yeah, we'll see, we'll.

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Speaker 1: See sidebar speaking about getting ready for like you know,

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Speaker 1: like the New Year. There's this girl on Instagram who

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Speaker 1: I was following, and I started following her because she

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Speaker 1: had this really, like really great breakdown about like the

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Speaker 1: pros and cons of veneers, right, I know, just so

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Speaker 1: Tracy's like Tracy's yes, She's like, you have such veried

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Speaker 1: random interests. I'm like, I know, I'll just get like, huh,

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Speaker 1: I'm not trying to get veneers. But it was so

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Speaker 1: interesting when she was talking about veneer's and so I

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Speaker 1: guess when average veneers are like a thousand dollars plus

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Speaker 1: per tooth. Yeah, it's a lot.

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Speaker 3: If you go to Turkey. Don't people go to Turkey?

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Speaker 1: I know. But then the problem is is that you know,

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Speaker 1: if something goes wrong, then you know, I don't know

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Speaker 1: because your teeth are like you know, really teeth health

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Speaker 1: and gum health is so critical because it can it

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Speaker 1: can affect you neurologically in every area.

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Speaker 3: I went to Mexico, he went o, he went to Cancun.

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Speaker 1: His teeth, So it just makes me nervous, Like teeth,

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Speaker 1: that's just makes me nervous. I'm just like, child, let

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Speaker 1: me do it here where I could come see you?

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Speaker 1: About you?

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Speaker 3: You're trying to get the ears.

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Speaker 1: No, no, no, no girl. I'm just saying no, no, girl,

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Speaker 1: like I'm in VISI line. They got your girl together.

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Speaker 1: I do have a gummy smile, but which some of

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Speaker 1: y'all have rudely pointed out as if it's not cute.

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Speaker 1: I don't worry about my gummy smile, child, These are

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Speaker 1: the baby teeth God gave me.

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Speaker 3: What do you want from us? Like smiles? Don't smile? Wait?

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Speaker 3: Your smiles. Why gums like the gum that they're literally holding.

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Speaker 3: What do you want me to do? I know?

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Speaker 1: Im there, Like when I was on it was like

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Speaker 1: some ad I had and someone was like, oh my god,

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Speaker 1: her smile and you know what, to the credit of

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Speaker 1: the dentists that watched the ads, like they were like

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Speaker 1: dentists in the comments like defending me, they're like, she's

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Speaker 1: got a very healthy set of from.

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Speaker 3: Wait they put you in an advertisement. That's how beautiful

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Speaker 3: your teeth heart?

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Speaker 1: No no, no, no no, this is like you know, like

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Speaker 1: a budget needs to add like you know, oh and

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Speaker 1: so like you know, like on instant, you know, people

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Speaker 1: just in the comments like I don't know her, she's

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Speaker 1: got a gummy smile, it's too much. I'm like, well

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Speaker 1: take it up with Jesus, what do you want me

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Speaker 1: to do? So anyway, I'm bringing that up because what

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Speaker 1: an episode not too far back talking about like the

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Speaker 1: cost of like you know, like you're kind of like

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Speaker 1: feminine maintenance or whatever, or just even just maintenance in general,

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Speaker 1: like an ecstatic maintenance. And this girl, the vineer girl,

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Speaker 1: was like she spent over two thousand dollars a month

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Speaker 1: on me. I mean from botox to filler, to micro

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Speaker 1: demobilasi demobration to some like body sculpting to like her

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Speaker 1: she had a weave to I couldn't. It was like

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Speaker 1: maybe twenty two hundred twenty three hundred, and she she's

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Speaker 1: a professional I guess content creator aka influencer. But I thought, like,

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Speaker 1: so it was about twenty five thousand dollars a year,

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Speaker 1: and I thought to myself, what, it's.

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Speaker 3: Just so wonderful.

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Speaker 1: I mean, I mean she's beautiful. Obviously you had to

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Speaker 1: be beautiful girl, damn, but like she's beautiful.

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Speaker 3: Listen, if you got the free time, that's you know,

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Speaker 3: like it takes a lot of time, and like not

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Speaker 3: just the money for that kind of stuff, Like I

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Speaker 3: really have not had and I'm okay with this. I

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Speaker 3: have only had one manicure in the last year, and

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Speaker 3: I only got my nails done because I was going

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Speaker 3: on a morning show and I was like, I got

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Speaker 3: to get my nails and my feet done. And I

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Speaker 3: just like I used to and I used to go

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Speaker 3: a lot before I had the baby. And now I'm like,

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Speaker 3: it's not that I don't value that kind of self

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Speaker 3: care time, but I just found out that like I

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Speaker 3: was only doing it for the look, and I really

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Speaker 3: hated the process, like I didn't like sitting. The only

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Speaker 3: kind of self care that I enjoyed going and spending

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Speaker 3: the time, and I feel better having done it. It's

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Speaker 3: like when I get a massage or a facial because

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Speaker 3: it is time, you know. But I did think about

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Speaker 3: the access to those types of like treatments is so

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Speaker 3: much more available now. It's not as pie in the sky.

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Speaker 3: Plus groupon I think the groupons are only around now

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Speaker 3: to give you discounts and that kind of stuff. Yes,

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Speaker 3: like you shout out to laser hair removal, thank you.

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Speaker 1: Does laser hair removal. That's what I do. And I

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Speaker 1: just was like, to your right, to your point, it's

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Speaker 1: not just money, it's also time, you know. And I

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Speaker 1: guess depending on what you do for a living, you know,

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Speaker 1: because I have friends who are like in the entertainment

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Speaker 1: industry and they are, you know, constantly making sure that

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Speaker 1: they have to look a certain way in order to

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Speaker 1: be able to work. But I just was just thinking

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Speaker 1: like wow, because like when does it And this young

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Speaker 1: woman was very young, like only in her twenties, and

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Speaker 1: I just I guess I keep thinking to myself like

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Speaker 1: what does the opportunity cost versus I mean to be

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Speaker 1: fair to her, you know her looks for how she

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Speaker 1: makes her money. But I thought to myself, what does

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Speaker 1: she invest in that? What would that look like? You

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Speaker 1: know in ten twenty thirty years, twenty five to thirty

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Speaker 1: thousand dollars a year on like you know her looks, which,

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Speaker 1: like I said, to be fair, she uses her looks

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Speaker 1: to make money.

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Speaker 3: That's a slippery slope. The slippery slope because I think

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Speaker 3: you could point the same finger. I mean, be like,

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Speaker 3: what how where would my investments be if I spent

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Speaker 3: three thousand or four thousand dollars and put that in

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Speaker 3: an index fun every month instead of sending my children

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Speaker 3: to a bare minimum daycare that cost And there's a

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Speaker 3: really good I don't know if I know you don't

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Speaker 3: want you don't want tons of TV, although I would

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Speaker 3: feel like social media accounts, you get your you cat,

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Speaker 3: I do get your scrolling, it get I get my

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Speaker 3: screen time.

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Speaker 1: It just different.

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Speaker 3: I know, what's your average screen time on your phone?

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Speaker 1: Yeah?

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00:18:55,480 --> 00:18:58,359
Speaker 3: No, but there's a show on to Be to Be,

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Speaker 3: which is northas like free streaming apps. Anyway, I only

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Speaker 3: downloaded it because my favorite actress is in the show

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Speaker 3: Nicola Coughlan from Bridgerton. It's called Big Mood and one

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Speaker 3: of the characters is like two girls in their early

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Speaker 3: thirties figuring shit out in London, and one of them

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Speaker 3: says like, some people choose to have a husband and

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Speaker 3: a wife and in their thirties, and some people choose

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Speaker 3: to get high on ketamine, you know, on the weekends.

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Speaker 3: Both choices are valid. And that's what I just want

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Speaker 3: to say, because I think everyone we have all this options, yes,

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Speaker 3: and I look at the girlies who have the disposable

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Speaker 3: income that I have to dispose of with my kids,

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Speaker 3: and I'm just like, that's a choice that they made,

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Speaker 3: good form, you know, and it just makes me feel

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Speaker 3: like there is so much I could do with that

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Speaker 3: money if I do have to, you know, pay.

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Speaker 1: For Lego's not for a place to judgment, because Lorden knows,

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Speaker 1: like you know, I get my nails done now, I

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Speaker 1: get my feet done, and brows. I've always got my

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Speaker 1: brows done. And I don't do anything to my skin

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Speaker 1: as of yet because it's African. Is still African, little skin,

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Speaker 1: little little you know, basic maintenance at home. But I

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Speaker 1: just think about you know, as we're making our choices

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Speaker 1: about where to put because to her, she probably would say,

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Speaker 1: this is an investment, and I can't argue with that

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Speaker 1: because like I'm a content creator. I show up physically

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Speaker 1: like this, this is an investment so I can continue

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Speaker 1: to make money. And so it's just like where do

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Speaker 1: you place the investment and what return are you looking for?

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Speaker 1: And so to me, I think the only wrong way

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Speaker 1: to do it is not to consciously make the decision

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Speaker 1: about the desired outcome, just to kind of be just

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Speaker 1: doing it. It's like, no, no, no, no, I'm putting this

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Speaker 1: twenty five thousand dollars a year in because it generates

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Speaker 1: me three four hundred thousand dollars a year. I'm just

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Speaker 1: making it that I don't know how much she makes

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Speaker 1: versus like I'm just kind of doing the thing because

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Speaker 1: I'm doing the thing, you know. Yeah, So no, I

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Speaker 1: wasn't an adjudstment. I follow her and I love how

430
00:20:50,440 --> 00:20:52,520
Speaker 1: open she is because she's a black girl, and she

431
00:20:52,600 --> 00:20:56,439
Speaker 1: said not enough women and women of color kind of

432
00:20:56,560 --> 00:21:00,280
Speaker 1: share the ends out, the costs, the pros and the

433
00:21:00,320 --> 00:21:03,760
Speaker 1: cons of kind of like this up like this next

434
00:21:03,840 --> 00:21:05,959
Speaker 1: level of beauty maintenance she said, because this hasn't been

435
00:21:06,000 --> 00:21:09,040
Speaker 1: done just secretly. So so some of your faiths are

436
00:21:09,040 --> 00:21:12,080
Speaker 1: doing this. They're like girls, she's lying, she's anybody working

437
00:21:12,119 --> 00:21:13,840
Speaker 1: out no more. This is what they're doing. And so

438
00:21:14,080 --> 00:21:16,280
Speaker 1: I follow her because I love that she breaks down

439
00:21:16,720 --> 00:21:21,120
Speaker 1: the financial aspect of beauty, you know, and so it's

440
00:21:21,200 --> 00:21:25,240
Speaker 1: really interesting, Like, Okay, I didn't know veniers were like

441
00:21:25,240 --> 00:21:28,639
Speaker 1: like a thousand to more plus a tooth. So you

442
00:21:28,680 --> 00:21:31,119
Speaker 1: know you get ten veneers, that's over ten thousand dollars.

443
00:21:31,119 --> 00:21:34,240
Speaker 1: You're like, okay, you know, I didn't know.

444
00:21:34,240 --> 00:21:35,840
Speaker 3: That's so big all the time, just making them a

445
00:21:35,880 --> 00:21:36,720
Speaker 3: little bit smaller.

446
00:21:36,960 --> 00:21:37,800
Speaker 1: Yeah.

447
00:21:38,200 --> 00:21:40,840
Speaker 3: Do you know my mom always for my wedding and

448
00:21:40,960 --> 00:21:43,600
Speaker 3: she modeled her teeth after mine, He said, who did

449
00:21:44,000 --> 00:21:44,440
Speaker 3: my mom?

450
00:21:44,800 --> 00:21:45,640
Speaker 1: She got vaniers?

451
00:21:46,119 --> 00:21:50,080
Speaker 3: Yeah, before my wedding she did. Ok they look so natural.

452
00:21:50,160 --> 00:21:52,040
Speaker 3: And she didn't go in there saying I want like

453
00:21:52,080 --> 00:21:54,240
Speaker 3: the big Taylor Swift teeth, no offense. She's the only

454
00:21:54,280 --> 00:21:57,320
Speaker 3: one whose teethchaking. They're just so in your face. But

455
00:21:57,359 --> 00:21:59,600
Speaker 3: my mom she was like, she gave them a picture

456
00:21:59,600 --> 00:22:00,000
Speaker 3: of my teeth.

457
00:22:00,400 --> 00:22:03,360
Speaker 1: Oh, I love that you have great teeth. I love it.

458
00:22:03,480 --> 00:22:05,520
Speaker 3: See, I love that I have little bunny teeth and

459
00:22:05,920 --> 00:22:08,000
Speaker 3: they're her teeth, but you know, they weren't looking like

460
00:22:08,040 --> 00:22:08,600
Speaker 3: that anymore.

461
00:22:08,640 --> 00:22:11,159
Speaker 1: So oh no, see, and that's what I mean, like,

462
00:22:11,240 --> 00:22:13,399
Speaker 1: you know, yeah, the only thing, like I didn't know

463
00:22:13,480 --> 00:22:15,199
Speaker 1: for example, that I guess she's supposed to replace your

464
00:22:15,280 --> 00:22:17,720
Speaker 1: veneers every ten to fifteen years or something like that.

465
00:22:18,080 --> 00:22:20,880
Speaker 3: Oh shoot, I did not know that either.

466
00:22:21,000 --> 00:22:22,800
Speaker 1: Well I don't know for sure, but I just remember

467
00:22:22,840 --> 00:22:24,080
Speaker 1: that was one of the girls that she was just

468
00:22:24,119 --> 00:22:27,359
Speaker 1: like being mindful that veneer's. I guess the same thing

469
00:22:27,400 --> 00:22:29,159
Speaker 1: for like a crown, Like I've got a crown. It

470
00:22:29,160 --> 00:22:32,359
Speaker 1: doesn't last forever and never never, I'm assuming you're supposed to,

471
00:22:32,359 --> 00:22:33,560
Speaker 1: like you know, there's always maintenance.

472
00:22:34,000 --> 00:22:36,240
Speaker 3: And so as I get older, you realize ten years

473
00:22:36,280 --> 00:22:38,880
Speaker 3: seems like a million years, you know what I mean,

474
00:22:38,920 --> 00:22:41,440
Speaker 3: Like when you're younger, and then ten years rolls around

475
00:22:41,480 --> 00:22:43,119
Speaker 3: and you're like, wait, it was ten years since that

476
00:22:43,600 --> 00:22:46,159
Speaker 3: damn Like our fridge is starting to be funky and

477
00:22:46,200 --> 00:22:48,240
Speaker 3: my husband's like, well, what husband? Eight years? I'm like

478
00:22:48,280 --> 00:22:51,960
Speaker 3: since when we just got here, I know, And.

479
00:22:51,960 --> 00:22:55,760
Speaker 1: You know that crazy because like I think she's the last,

480
00:22:56,080 --> 00:23:00,280
Speaker 1: like your great grandmother's fridge is still running someplace like

481
00:23:00,480 --> 00:23:02,399
Speaker 1: you know, but obviously they make it not less on purpose,

482
00:23:02,440 --> 00:23:05,480
Speaker 1: so you can continue to buy. But there's another random

483
00:23:05,520 --> 00:23:08,200
Speaker 1: Instagram account that I followed that talks about old fridges.

484
00:23:08,359 --> 00:23:10,560
Speaker 1: They show fridges from like the twenties and thirties and

485
00:23:10,560 --> 00:23:12,640
Speaker 1: forties and fifty and they show you how they still

486
00:23:12,680 --> 00:23:14,720
Speaker 1: work in all the cool gadgets they used to have

487
00:23:15,000 --> 00:23:19,120
Speaker 1: that we don't have. And I'm like, we are developing backwards.

488
00:23:19,680 --> 00:23:23,960
Speaker 3: It's almost like corporate greed is running our lives. No,

489
00:23:24,560 --> 00:23:30,040
Speaker 3: you heard your first BA faan survive with us survive.

490
00:23:31,480 --> 00:23:34,160
Speaker 1: Well, we'd love to know, Like what are your travel plans?

491
00:23:34,280 --> 00:23:37,679
Speaker 1: What's your most expensive beauty expense? How much does it

492
00:23:37,720 --> 00:23:39,080
Speaker 1: costing you? Is it worth it?

493
00:23:39,680 --> 00:23:44,040
Speaker 3: Where do you think Tiffany should go? Yes, holidays to

494
00:23:44,160 --> 00:23:48,240
Speaker 3: change her scenery, make a new tradition. Yes, maybe there's

495
00:23:48,280 --> 00:23:50,639
Speaker 3: some good ideas. I bet some BA listeners travel and I.

496
00:23:50,640 --> 00:23:52,520
Speaker 1: Would love that, Like, yeah, how it is? It's like

497
00:23:52,640 --> 00:23:54,480
Speaker 1: or don't go here, girl is so crazy. I don't

498
00:23:54,520 --> 00:23:56,199
Speaker 1: want to go anywhere. I want someplace where it's going

499
00:23:56,240 --> 00:23:58,679
Speaker 1: to be peaceful and serene and beautiful. Those are my rules.

500
00:23:59,040 --> 00:24:02,119
Speaker 1: And not too cold, peaceful, serene, beautiful, not too cold.

501
00:24:02,640 --> 00:24:07,520
Speaker 1: I don't mind traveling internationally. I don't mind staying domestically. Yeah,

502
00:24:07,680 --> 00:24:12,520
Speaker 1: just peaceful, serene, beautiful, like naturally beautiful and yeah and

503
00:24:12,600 --> 00:24:15,320
Speaker 1: not too cold. Yeah. So if we should take a

504
00:24:15,320 --> 00:24:19,760
Speaker 1: break and come back with some brown girl lookt me aoray.

505
00:24:19,520 --> 00:24:27,440
Speaker 3: For the brow boos brown yeahkur type B A fan

506
00:24:27,480 --> 00:24:34,639
Speaker 3: will be right back and we back to be based

507
00:24:34,640 --> 00:24:35,679
Speaker 3: and break back.

508
00:24:35,720 --> 00:24:42,360
Speaker 2: Were back, We back, and now it's time to boost up.

509
00:24:42,400 --> 00:24:45,880
Speaker 2: Break up, boost up, break up, boost up? Break Are

510
00:24:45,880 --> 00:24:48,879
Speaker 2: you gonna boost? Is you gonna break?

511
00:24:50,200 --> 00:24:55,200
Speaker 1: What you're gonna do, what you're gonna take? You want

512
00:24:55,200 --> 00:24:56,399
Speaker 1: to go first? You want to go second? When do

513
00:24:56,440 --> 00:24:56,879
Speaker 1: you want to go?

514
00:24:57,520 --> 00:25:00,679
Speaker 3: I will go first? Because this how happens to be

515
00:25:01,240 --> 00:25:03,040
Speaker 3: if the show is airing, when I think it's airing.

516
00:25:03,080 --> 00:25:08,639
Speaker 3: This happens to be Black Breastfeeding Awareness Month, which sounds

517
00:25:08,680 --> 00:25:12,480
Speaker 3: so specific because it is. It's actually really important because

518
00:25:13,040 --> 00:25:16,040
Speaker 3: it's not just that in hospitals that a lot of

519
00:25:16,040 --> 00:25:18,239
Speaker 3: new moms. I think now we're finally getting educational on

520
00:25:18,280 --> 00:25:21,520
Speaker 3: how to like breastfeed, but especially among black women who

521
00:25:21,560 --> 00:25:23,439
Speaker 3: tend to not have the care and love that we

522
00:25:23,520 --> 00:25:26,960
Speaker 3: need in a hospital setting. I think it's really important

523
00:25:26,960 --> 00:25:28,480
Speaker 3: to have months like these, and I thought I would

524
00:25:28,520 --> 00:25:32,760
Speaker 3: use it to spotlight Elaine Welterrot's new nonprofit called Birth Fund,

525
00:25:33,119 --> 00:25:35,040
Speaker 3: which I think we talked about a little bit before

526
00:25:35,680 --> 00:25:38,840
Speaker 3: when it first came out. But birth Fund is basically

527
00:25:38,920 --> 00:25:42,000
Speaker 3: like an answer to the fact that the healthcare system

528
00:25:42,080 --> 00:25:45,680
Speaker 3: is failing black women, especially black mothers. I don't think

529
00:25:45,720 --> 00:25:48,720
Speaker 3: that these numbers have truly sunk in yet, but I

530
00:25:48,840 --> 00:25:51,440
Speaker 3: just wanted to read some of them. But the US

531
00:25:51,600 --> 00:25:57,119
Speaker 3: maternal mortality rate is ten times higher, not just in

532
00:25:57,200 --> 00:26:03,359
Speaker 3: other countries, other high income countries, our comparable economies. You

533
00:26:03,400 --> 00:26:06,600
Speaker 3: were ten times more likely to die as a mom

534
00:26:06,760 --> 00:26:11,200
Speaker 3: in the United States. That is embarrassing, embarrassing and crazy.

535
00:26:11,440 --> 00:26:15,560
Speaker 3: Black women, however, are dying at three to four times

536
00:26:15,560 --> 00:26:20,320
Speaker 3: the rate of white women during and after childbirth. That

537
00:26:20,520 --> 00:26:26,000
Speaker 3: is insane. That is I don't know why. That's not

538
00:26:26,040 --> 00:26:28,399
Speaker 3: like a presidential platform we should be running on, like

539
00:26:28,520 --> 00:26:30,720
Speaker 3: we have to save the mothers. So I just wanted

540
00:26:30,720 --> 00:26:33,399
Speaker 3: to shout out birth Fund. It's founded by one of

541
00:26:33,440 --> 00:26:37,520
Speaker 3: my idols, Elaine welter Roth, who is just this phenomenal

542
00:26:37,600 --> 00:26:41,479
Speaker 3: former journalist and now everything is so if you want

543
00:26:41,520 --> 00:26:44,840
Speaker 3: to check it out, go to thebirthfund dot Com where

544
00:26:44,880 --> 00:26:47,960
Speaker 3: you can invest, you can join the community, because it's

545
00:26:47,960 --> 00:26:54,960
Speaker 3: really about matching black women, black mothers to doulas and

546
00:26:55,280 --> 00:26:59,800
Speaker 3: what's the other thing besides adula midwives who can help

547
00:27:00,280 --> 00:27:03,160
Speaker 3: like get you through that process with less trauma. I'm

548
00:27:03,280 --> 00:27:07,280
Speaker 3: very lucky because I had a really great like experience

549
00:27:07,280 --> 00:27:09,520
Speaker 3: at the hospital that I go to, uh, that I

550
00:27:09,560 --> 00:27:12,200
Speaker 3: went to for my two births. But clearly the majority

551
00:27:12,240 --> 00:27:15,320
Speaker 3: of or like a lot of women of color who

552
00:27:15,320 --> 00:27:17,480
Speaker 3: were giving birth are not having the same experience, and

553
00:27:17,480 --> 00:27:21,400
Speaker 3: in fact, it's like threatening our lives. So the birth

554
00:27:21,440 --> 00:27:26,600
Speaker 3: fund dot Com. Check it out, and happy National Black

555
00:27:26,680 --> 00:27:30,879
Speaker 3: Breastfeeding Month. Shout out to your nipple Creams and uh,

556
00:27:31,200 --> 00:27:33,639
Speaker 3: I salute to you. I was so happy to pack up

557
00:27:33,680 --> 00:27:35,480
Speaker 3: my pump for maybe the last time.

558
00:27:36,080 --> 00:27:40,439
Speaker 1: Oh well, I'm going to take just a little lighthearted break,

559
00:27:40,600 --> 00:27:43,800
Speaker 1: brown break because you know, y'all know I've recently moved

560
00:27:44,160 --> 00:27:46,840
Speaker 1: and so when Jrell was here, we had brought like

561
00:27:46,840 --> 00:27:49,520
Speaker 1: a sleep number bed for a bajillion dollars. I want

562
00:27:49,520 --> 00:27:51,520
Speaker 1: to say, we've probably spent around seven thousand dollars. They're

563
00:27:51,600 --> 00:27:52,840
Speaker 1: so freaking expensive.

564
00:27:53,119 --> 00:27:54,800
Speaker 3: Damn, that's we got to be like, well, you're going

565
00:27:54,840 --> 00:27:57,080
Speaker 3: to sleep on it for one hundred thousand million days,

566
00:27:57,119 --> 00:27:58,680
Speaker 3: so it's only eight cents a day.

567
00:27:59,400 --> 00:28:03,280
Speaker 1: And so yeah, and I asked a friend of mine, Leela,

568
00:28:03,359 --> 00:28:05,520
Speaker 1: who does my makeup, you know when I do TV?

569
00:28:05,560 --> 00:28:07,240
Speaker 1: And so I said, Leila, is it worth it? She's like,

570
00:28:07,440 --> 00:28:10,720
Speaker 1: is I? And that's exactly how I feel? So I

571
00:28:10,840 --> 00:28:13,520
Speaker 1: have to disconnect it. There's so many pieces to disconnect

572
00:28:14,440 --> 00:28:16,240
Speaker 1: when you move a sleep number bed, because there's like

573
00:28:16,320 --> 00:28:19,240
Speaker 1: a sleep What makes us sleep number bed quote unquote

574
00:28:19,280 --> 00:28:22,040
Speaker 1: so special is that like it's like a you can

575
00:28:22,080 --> 00:28:25,240
Speaker 1: make it as firm or as dense as you want.

576
00:28:25,280 --> 00:28:27,840
Speaker 1: And so there's like a pump and an air filtration,

577
00:28:28,080 --> 00:28:30,920
Speaker 1: which sounds all good until it's time to move. Also, too,

578
00:28:30,960 --> 00:28:33,119
Speaker 1: there's like a magnetic system that you're almost going to

579
00:28:33,160 --> 00:28:37,240
Speaker 1: lose your life in order to like disconnect. And then

580
00:28:37,320 --> 00:28:40,440
Speaker 1: I had a footwarmer, and so there's like that. It was,

581
00:28:40,880 --> 00:28:42,960
Speaker 1: I mean, I felt like an engineer. I said, I

582
00:28:43,000 --> 00:28:45,120
Speaker 1: have graduated in NASA. I can now fly to the moon.

583
00:28:45,760 --> 00:28:47,960
Speaker 1: And so because I was nervous, I mean I was

584
00:28:48,000 --> 00:28:50,400
Speaker 1: nervous for the clean for the moving guys to do it,

585
00:28:50,760 --> 00:28:53,600
Speaker 1: because I watched the video online. I was like, oh no, no, no,

586
00:28:53,960 --> 00:28:56,600
Speaker 1: I don't want anyone to come in here without the care,

587
00:28:56,720 --> 00:28:59,640
Speaker 1: not as seven thousand dollars, honey, you know. And so

588
00:28:59,840 --> 00:29:02,040
Speaker 1: I disassembled. I didn't have to move the mattress or anything,

589
00:29:02,040 --> 00:29:06,400
Speaker 1: but just like unplugging child, only for me to lay

590
00:29:06,400 --> 00:29:08,760
Speaker 1: in the bed like a regular mattress. Ask me if

591
00:29:08,800 --> 00:29:12,440
Speaker 1: I use after the last time I lifted my head

592
00:29:12,520 --> 00:29:15,840
Speaker 1: up on my feet or I mean.

593
00:29:15,680 --> 00:29:18,600
Speaker 3: You're like, you know what also works is the pillows, girls,

594
00:29:18,640 --> 00:29:19,200
Speaker 3: behind your head.

595
00:29:19,280 --> 00:29:22,800
Speaker 1: That's literally what I use when I tell you I

596
00:29:22,840 --> 00:29:25,240
Speaker 1: am a pillow under my arm between my legs. Girl,

597
00:29:25,480 --> 00:29:27,400
Speaker 1: I mean, I don't actually like a high head because

598
00:29:27,600 --> 00:29:29,200
Speaker 1: at this age my neck is like, don't do that.

599
00:29:29,720 --> 00:29:31,760
Speaker 1: And who sleeps with their feet up unless you have

600
00:29:31,840 --> 00:29:34,560
Speaker 1: some sort of like foot injury, and like, I mean

601
00:29:34,840 --> 00:29:37,400
Speaker 1: my firmness of mattress, I don't switch it from night

602
00:29:37,400 --> 00:29:38,840
Speaker 1: to night. So I could just buy it at this

603
00:29:39,560 --> 00:29:40,760
Speaker 1: it was a lot of.

604
00:29:43,920 --> 00:29:46,080
Speaker 3: I bet you Superman was he the advocate for that day?

605
00:29:46,160 --> 00:29:49,240
Speaker 3: Of course he was, because men loved their goddamn badgets

606
00:29:49,280 --> 00:29:53,320
Speaker 3: and gives me just settings. I mean, I just my

607
00:29:53,400 --> 00:29:56,440
Speaker 3: husband was actually jealous of the baby. Remy took the

608
00:29:56,520 --> 00:29:58,920
Speaker 3: remote control and found some kind of setting by just

609
00:29:58,960 --> 00:30:03,040
Speaker 3: pressing buttons twenty minutes. And my husband was like, he's like, god,

610
00:30:03,080 --> 00:30:05,360
Speaker 3: how did remy find that saying? And it was like

611
00:30:05,400 --> 00:30:09,440
Speaker 3: something I was like, just just yes, tinkering.

612
00:30:09,560 --> 00:30:12,440
Speaker 1: So so if you were sorry to sleep number and

613
00:30:12,440 --> 00:30:14,840
Speaker 1: not that you were gonna, like, you know, advertise here anyway,

614
00:30:15,560 --> 00:30:17,760
Speaker 1: if you're thinking about one of them fancy spancy s,

615
00:30:17,800 --> 00:30:20,120
Speaker 1: fancy beds, unless you have some sort of medical condition

616
00:30:20,360 --> 00:30:21,680
Speaker 1: where it's like, oh I have to sleep my head

617
00:30:21,760 --> 00:30:25,800
Speaker 1: up or my feet up or whatever, is it worth it.

618
00:30:26,200 --> 00:30:27,920
Speaker 1: It's a nice bed to have, so I'm not like, oh,

619
00:30:28,040 --> 00:30:31,280
Speaker 1: to some bad bed, is it worth a seven eight five? Now,

620
00:30:31,720 --> 00:30:34,240
Speaker 1: get you a regular mattress at the firmace that you're liking,

621
00:30:34,560 --> 00:30:37,080
Speaker 1: and put some extra pills behind your head. It'll be

622
00:30:37,160 --> 00:30:39,840
Speaker 1: much easier to move as well, Like where this leap

623
00:30:39,960 --> 00:30:42,080
Speaker 1: where this sleeping number bed is going to stay put

624
00:30:42,120 --> 00:30:44,000
Speaker 1: if I move, is going to the next people who

625
00:30:44,080 --> 00:30:46,680
Speaker 1: have my place you get to keep is yours? Congratulations.

626
00:30:47,720 --> 00:30:50,480
Speaker 1: So yeah, it's just that is my brown break that

627
00:30:50,720 --> 00:30:52,960
Speaker 1: like it is not to me. The juice is not

628
00:30:53,000 --> 00:30:56,240
Speaker 1: worth the squeeze, Although in general it's a nice bed

629
00:30:56,280 --> 00:30:58,160
Speaker 1: it's just not worth the cost that you have to

630
00:30:58,360 --> 00:31:01,000
Speaker 1: you know that you have to buy it for. So

631
00:31:01,040 --> 00:31:02,480
Speaker 1: that was it because I was just thinking about that

632
00:31:02,520 --> 00:31:03,840
Speaker 1: as I was moving, Like you know, some things you

633
00:31:03,880 --> 00:31:06,000
Speaker 1: move you're like, oh easy, busy, and some things you're like,

634
00:31:06,080 --> 00:31:09,360
Speaker 1: oh should this just stay with the house child, you know,

635
00:31:09,400 --> 00:31:12,920
Speaker 1: because it's too much. But you know, I mean I'm settling.

636
00:31:13,080 --> 00:31:14,560
Speaker 3: Is it going to rich John Tyland or is it?

637
00:31:14,640 --> 00:31:17,160
Speaker 1: Yeah? It has to girl for seven thousand.

638
00:31:16,800 --> 00:31:19,640
Speaker 3: Dollars that better be in heirloom, Like you better be.

639
00:31:23,440 --> 00:31:25,160
Speaker 1: Roaming and me going to inherit that bit and my

640
00:31:25,240 --> 00:31:31,160
Speaker 1: will yeah, and to you are bequeathing my seat number.

641
00:31:30,880 --> 00:31:32,880
Speaker 3: With the bag of Alan Rinch's.

642
00:31:34,880 --> 00:31:38,240
Speaker 1: So so yeah, that was just my brown bird. So

643
00:31:38,280 --> 00:31:40,200
Speaker 1: like you know, if you're looking for a mattress, that

644
00:31:40,360 --> 00:31:44,480
Speaker 1: ain't it. Yeah, So you know what, the guys, it's

645
00:31:44,480 --> 00:31:51,080
Speaker 1: the time again when we say goodbye farewell. I do,

646
00:31:51,680 --> 00:31:56,880
Speaker 1: I do, and stay rich girls and guys. We'll see

647
00:31:56,880 --> 00:31:58,600
Speaker 1: you guys. Oh we actually we'll see you on Friday

648
00:31:58,600 --> 00:31:59,200
Speaker 1: for be

649
00:31:59,400 --> 00:32:05,840
Speaker 3: A Q bybee I Ham