Speaker 1: Welcome to the Psychology Podcast, where we give you insights
Speaker 1: into the mind, brain, behavior, and creativity. I'm doctor Scott
Speaker 1: Barry Kaufman, and in each episode I have a conversation
Speaker 1: with a guest who will stimulate your mind and give
Speaker 1: you a greater understanding of yourself, others, and the world
Speaker 1: to live in. Hopefully we'll also provide a glimpse into
Speaker 1: human possibility. Thanks for listening and enjoy the podcast today.
Speaker 1: It's great to have Erica Lust on the podcast. Erica
Speaker 1: is an acclaimed to adult filmmaker who creates sex positive
Speaker 1: indie adult cinema that portrays sexually intelligent narratives, relatable characters,
Speaker 1: and realistic hot sex. Her ex Confessions project turns the
Speaker 1: public's anonymous fantasies into explicit and artistic short films, while
Speaker 1: her recently relaunched Lost Cinema is a US based studio
Speaker 1: with original series and feature length films for lovers of
Speaker 1: cinema and sex. In twenty fifteen, Erica gave her essential
Speaker 1: ted X talk It's Time for Porn to Change. Her
Speaker 1: story was also featured in the first episode of the
Speaker 1: Netflix documentary series Hot Girls Wanted Turned On, directed by
Speaker 1: Rashida Jones. This year, Erica was named as one of
Speaker 1: the BBC one hundred Women's Most Influential Women of twenty nineteen.
Speaker 1: That's pretty impressive, Erica, So great to chat with you today. Hey,
Speaker 1: it's very great to chat to you too. Well, I'm
Speaker 1: really excited to chat with you today. I actually came
Speaker 1: across your work first when I was watching that documentary
Speaker 1: Hot Girls Wanted on Netflix, and I was like, I
Speaker 1: was so fascinated by this whole new world of I
Speaker 1: don't know what feminist porn is. That is that what
Speaker 1: it's being called or this just new genre. Yeah, it's
Speaker 1: one of the things it's being called because I think
Speaker 1: that people are struggling a little to try to find
Speaker 1: an etiquette, a name for it. What is it? Is
Speaker 1: it poor and buy? When? Is it porn for women?
Speaker 1: Is it artistic porn? Is it, you know, ethical porn?
Speaker 1: What should we all call it? And I mean we
Speaker 1: could we could definitely talk about feminist porn. One of
Speaker 1: the things that I'm really pushing for is getting women
Speaker 1: into porn, you know, not only in front of the camera,
Speaker 1: but behind the camera. Women as you know, creative people
Speaker 1: thinking about what do we want to see what do
Speaker 1: we like? What what kind of situations would we you know,
Speaker 1: get turned on by and then taking you know, the
Speaker 1: action in our own hands and start making instead of
Speaker 1: just feeling excluded from the genre or fed up with
Speaker 1: all the shovin is the ship that's out there on
Speaker 1: the internet. So let me ask you, so, then, what's
Speaker 1: wrong as you see it? What are some specific things
Speaker 1: that you think are wrong with the standard sort of
Speaker 1: if you go to like porn hub sort of thing. Well,
Speaker 1: I think there's many things that's wrong with it. I mean,
Speaker 1: there's definitely a structural problem where women are getting used
Speaker 1: as some kind of sexual objects for male fantasy, where
Speaker 1: women are being this kind of of items objectified, and
Speaker 1: the whole purpose of them is not having their own
Speaker 1: pleasure but giving pleasure to other people. And then what
Speaker 1: I see all the time is the language how they
Speaker 1: are treating women. I mean, if you can go to
Speaker 1: any of the tube sites online and you will see
Speaker 1: terms like, you know, bitch, slot nasty, it's kind of
Speaker 1: you know, bag her up, choke her nail, destroy, destroyed
Speaker 1: time any teams for example. It's something that you can
Speaker 1: totally find online on any of these tube sites. I
Speaker 1: don't think that it's a respectful language. I don't feel
Speaker 1: like I can identify with it with the situations, the
Speaker 1: sexual situations that I'm presented to. I don't like the way.
Speaker 1: I don't like the way women are represented, but I
Speaker 1: don't like the way men are represented either, And I
Speaker 1: get I get. I get upset when when I see
Speaker 1: all this kind of fetisization that they are doing based
Speaker 1: on you know, our ages, our ethnicity, our body types,
Speaker 1: how we are getting divided into groups. How you have
Speaker 1: a feeling that it's not really about portraying human sexuality
Speaker 1: or kind of you know, people coming together having the
Speaker 1: best possible sex and you know this wonderful chemistry together.
Speaker 1: But it feels more like some kind of of of
Speaker 1: construct where it's just about about showing body parts bumping
Speaker 1: into each outter somehow. So, yeah, can you tell me
Speaker 1: a little bit about what users could expect to see
Speaker 1: when they view the stuff that you've produced and directed
Speaker 1: and you also write? Do you write some of the
Speaker 1: scripts too? I do? I do you do everything over there?
Speaker 1: Both of it? I do? Actually, Yes, that's actually a
Speaker 1: fun job for you. It is a wonderful job to have. Actually,
Speaker 1: I mean I am so grateful. I'm so happy. And
Speaker 1: it's been many years now because I made my first
Speaker 1: short from two thousand and four and it's been you know,
Speaker 1: quite or ny really yeah, yeah, So can you tell me,
Speaker 1: you know, in contrast to some of the things you
Speaker 1: just mentioned, can you tell me what people can expect
Speaker 1: to see? What do you think is like a yeah,
Speaker 1: like what is the corrective? As you well, you know,
Speaker 1: I think that that sex can be so many different things, obviously,
Speaker 1: and it's not like there's the perfect formula. So we
Speaker 1: do that all the time and just repeat it. That's
Speaker 1: not it. You know. What we are trying to do.
Speaker 1: We are trying to listening to people, to real people
Speaker 1: instead of just you know, having machines doing the algorithms
Speaker 1: and telling you what people are clicking on. We are
Speaker 1: actually thinking about what kind of stories we would like
Speaker 1: to represent, what kind of of people we would like
Speaker 1: to work with. We're working very hard to get people
Speaker 1: from diverse backgrounds, people with different body types, people with
Speaker 1: different ages. I mean I shot with with you know,
Speaker 1: a couple who were already seventy plus for example, that's
Speaker 1: you know and and And the film is fantastic, but
Speaker 1: it's I mean, what we are doing is really it's
Speaker 1: it's the adult film for people who you know, who
Speaker 1: respect other people and who enjoy cinema and who wants
Speaker 1: to see something that is just well crafted, well done,
Speaker 1: shot by you know, by myself and my wonderful team
Speaker 1: and also many of the guest directors that we are
Speaker 1: working with, because I'm not the only director working for
Speaker 1: for ex Confessions and Last Cinema, And it's really about
Speaker 1: understanding the situations and the stories. Who are these people,
Speaker 1: why are they interested in each shutter? You know, where
Speaker 1: does this passion comes from? And trying to somehow understand
Speaker 1: not only you know, not not only looking at this
Speaker 1: sexual experience, but understanding their emotional connection also. At the
Speaker 1: same time, it's like we're trying to make the best
Speaker 1: possible cinema we can, but adult cinema where we are
Speaker 1: not afraid of actually showing the sex, showing the people
Speaker 1: having the sex. Yeah, there was a quote from your
Speaker 1: ted X talk that I really liked. You said the
Speaker 1: sex can stay dirty, but the values have to be clean.
Speaker 1: I thought that was really interesting. Respecting people. I mean,
Speaker 1: in the end, I think that we are all we
Speaker 1: are all turned on by watching people having sex. It's
Speaker 1: in our humanity. It's you know, it's we we actually
Speaker 1: we come from sex. I mean I exist. I'm here
Speaker 1: because two people have sex. Sexiest you know, the most
Speaker 1: natural thing there is. Sex is the source of life.
Speaker 1: Sex is everything. It's energy, It's pure energy. So it's
Speaker 1: sad to see that we live in a society where
Speaker 1: we are so guilty and we feel so ashamed about
Speaker 1: our sexuality. I think that we should we should definitely
Speaker 1: try to communicate better with other people around sex and
Speaker 1: around who we are and what we want and what
Speaker 1: we lust for. It's it's it's it's really something that
Speaker 1: where people actually can connect a lot instead of feeling so,
Speaker 1: you know, so strange from other people and so that
Speaker 1: something is wrong with them. I mean, I talk to
Speaker 1: people all the time telling me I don't know. I think,
Speaker 1: maybe you know there's something wrong with me. Maybe I'm
Speaker 1: a perverb. You know, I have this fantasies and this ideas.
Speaker 1: And then when you actually get to see other people
Speaker 1: having the same kind of fantasies and ideas in a film,
Speaker 1: for example, I think that can really help a lot
Speaker 1: of people to understand their their own needs. And their
Speaker 1: own sexuality. And I get lots of the emails, for example,
Speaker 1: from couples telling me how they have actually used my
Speaker 1: films to start conversations around sex and about sex and
Speaker 1: about you know, how they feel and what they want,
Speaker 1: and especially when it comes to things like submission or domination, BDSM, etc.
Speaker 1: You know where people are having these ideas but they
Speaker 1: are so scared to tell their partners about it. You
Speaker 1: mentioned earlier about unethical porn, and you mentioned some of
Speaker 1: these words that are used to describe women in objectification.
Speaker 1: So let me just play Devil's advocate for a second,
Speaker 1: because I love doing that on the podcast. What do
Speaker 1: you have in the case of example where you have
Speaker 1: two consenting adults, Let's say the porn is shot ethically,
Speaker 1: but they both are really turned on by in that
Speaker 1: moment deggregation and humiliation. Do you see that as necessarily unethical?
Speaker 1: Do you see what I'm saying that that could definitely
Speaker 1: be okay? I think that what we really need to
Speaker 1: look into when we are talking about the adult industry
Speaker 1: is the production values. It's how it works behind the
Speaker 1: cameras obviously, and making sure that the performers, the people
Speaker 1: who are acting out. The fantasies are wanting to do
Speaker 1: everything that is included that they have had the kind
Speaker 1: of dialogues before, talking about their boundaries, what they like,
Speaker 1: what they don't like, into to detail. Obviously if we
Speaker 1: are talking about something where different kind of degradation will
Speaker 1: be included. So those are conversations that we obviously have
Speaker 1: before shooting, actually quite long before shooting, when we start
Speaker 1: the casting process to make sure that we are casting
Speaker 1: the right people. But then these are conversations that we
Speaker 1: also need to have this, you know, during the whole
Speaker 1: process the same day of a shooting. The performers need
Speaker 1: to know that if they can, they can change their
Speaker 1: mind whenever they want to, that we can always you know,
Speaker 1: cut and start talking about where this is going and
Speaker 1: if there's something we want to change. I love that
Speaker 1: you're opening up this conversation. It's just it's just it's
Speaker 1: not something that's really discussed that openly, and I I
Speaker 1: don't know if I'm even taking a risk covering it
Speaker 1: on the Psychology podcast, you know, but I just I
Speaker 1: just love when people have really honest, respectful conversations about
Speaker 1: things that that are so prevalent. But no, it's talking
Speaker 1: about something. I just it's it's astonishing to me just
Speaker 1: how popular poorn is and we're talking about one third
Speaker 1: of it reading Google search is pornography. And it also
Speaker 1: seems like even you know, on these standard porn sites,
Speaker 1: it seems like the more taboo or wrong a certain
Speaker 1: porn is, the more views it has. And we're talking
Speaker 1: millions and millions and millions of views. So why is
Speaker 1: it so popular? And especially like why is the most
Speaker 1: taboo stuff the most popular? What do you think this
Speaker 1: has to say about human nature? Is a psychology podcast? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: Well that a fair question. It's a fair question, and
Speaker 1: it's a difficult question to answer obviously human nature it's
Speaker 1: a big subject. Then it's a complex subject. I think
Speaker 1: that it would be interesting to talk a little about
Speaker 1: how the adult industry works, really because I think that
Speaker 1: there's lots of people not being aware of what is
Speaker 1: going on. They kind of seem to believe that porn
Speaker 1: is just for free and that's you know, it's outer
Speaker 1: on the internet. Like you're saying, you can search whatever,
Speaker 1: you can get into any any any site in just
Speaker 1: the click, and you can see that the nastiest stuff
Speaker 1: you would like to watch and you don't even have
Speaker 1: to tell anyone, you know, it's it's all private kind of.
Speaker 1: But I think, I think it's really important to understand
Speaker 1: that this is an industry and that what people think
Speaker 1: is porn for free online is actually most of that
Speaker 1: content is stolen content taken from you know, content providers
Speaker 1: who have spent money in producing that content and then
Speaker 1: they see it uploaded to all of these sites without
Speaker 1: being able to earn anything from those videos. And the
Speaker 1: same goes for obviously for for the performers and today
Speaker 1: I mean most of the of the of the tube
Speaker 1: side that you probably know by name. I don't need
Speaker 1: to mention them because you you know them, you know,
Speaker 1: But what are you saying about me Erica? Even not
Speaker 1: only you, you know all of you listening to these
Speaker 1: you know them. You know that you've been there, you
Speaker 1: knows cleared your historial on on on your computer, but
Speaker 1: I know you've been there. But I think it's in Honestly,
Speaker 1: if you saw my history, it would be Erica lust
Speaker 1: free trial that you all gave me free trial. I mean,
Speaker 1: if you if you want to know the truth, if
Speaker 1: you want to know the truth, okay, But but research
Speaker 1: I was doing research. But that's that's greater. Hear. Thank
Speaker 1: you so much for supporting indeporn because that's that's a
Speaker 1: matter another way of talking about it. And I use
Speaker 1: that term quite often actually independent pornography because it's made
Speaker 1: by you know, independent producers and directors and small common
Speaker 1: companies and performers, etc. Because the adult industry is mostly
Speaker 1: owned by one company. It's one company based in Montreal,
Speaker 1: Canada called mind Geek, and they are the owner to
Speaker 1: almost all of the sites that used by name and
Speaker 1: many of the important big studios. Also because their business
Speaker 1: has been the last twelve years too, you know, they
Speaker 1: started putting out videos for free on the internet. That
Speaker 1: kind of made it difficult for the industry to have
Speaker 1: their pay sites working. People abandoned the pay sites, they
Speaker 1: went for the free online content that was stolen and
Speaker 1: then little by little when people you know went out
Speaker 1: of business, this big company decided to start buying the industry.
Speaker 1: So now they are owners of I would say, seventy
Speaker 1: five eight percent of the industry. It's one company. It's
Speaker 1: a monopoly. And I think that if people would be
Speaker 1: more aware of how this works and they would do
Speaker 1: you know a parallelism to other industries and starting to
Speaker 1: to you know, to be mindful in their consuming of pornography.
Speaker 1: I think we could, we could get to a better place.
Speaker 1: You know. This is no different from big pharma you heard,
Speaker 1: you heard the idea of big pharma, right, or big food.
Speaker 1: You know, we're talking about a few companies, very big
Speaker 1: conglomerates owning the whole food industry or the whole pharma industry,
Speaker 1: you know. And the funny thing is that they are
Speaker 1: not there really to you know, to make the best
Speaker 1: possible food with the best healthy ingredients for all of us. No,
Speaker 1: they are interested in earning money and concentrating power. And
Speaker 1: this is happening, you know. It's big data, big food,
Speaker 1: big pharma, big fashion, whatever. And the same is happening
Speaker 1: with big porn. So I, you know, try when I
Speaker 1: talk to people, I say, hey, I think it's great
Speaker 1: that you want to watch porn, but I would like
Speaker 1: you to think a little about about how the industry works,
Speaker 1: about who's owning it, about if you agree with the
Speaker 1: values that you are seeing in the porn that you
Speaker 1: are watching. Please, you know, don't just look at the images,
Speaker 1: also read the text. Try to figure out if you
Speaker 1: like what you are actually watching, because I hear so
Speaker 1: many times people saying, you know, I didn't realize, I
Speaker 1: didn't even think about it. I just thought that porn
Speaker 1: was this kind of dirty, you know, thing that I
Speaker 1: had for myself during late hours at night, and nobody
Speaker 1: really cared about what was going on, you know, but
Speaker 1: people do care. You know, this is actually there's there
Speaker 1: is an industry. There are lots of people making, you know,
Speaker 1: they're living out of porn, people who have values and
Speaker 1: who have ideas. And maybe if you you know, maybe
Speaker 1: maybe you should. You should use the same strategy as
Speaker 1: when you go to the supermarket, because I know that
Speaker 1: many people today have become aware and they are actually
Speaker 1: checking out the producers on the labels. You know, when
Speaker 1: they go to the supermarket, they are thinking, Hey, I'm
Speaker 1: gonna buy some eggs. Am I gonna buy the cheapest
Speaker 1: possible eggs coming from you know, these horrible factories where
Speaker 1: they are you know, killing off the birds and they
Speaker 1: are standing on each other and they are you know,
Speaker 1: in in cages where they can't even lift their wings.
Speaker 1: Am I gonna buy those kind of eggs? Or am
Speaker 1: I gonna go to a farmer market. Am I gonna
Speaker 1: you know, check that they have actually you know that
Speaker 1: they are free range, et cetera, et cetera. You use
Speaker 1: that same philosophy, that same idea. As a consumer, you
Speaker 1: have power, You have power to decide where you want
Speaker 1: to put your money. And the funny thing is that
Speaker 1: even if you say, okay, money, you're talking about money.
Speaker 1: I just watched the free stuff on the internet. You know,
Speaker 1: I'm not paying anybody for this, but actually you kind
Speaker 1: of are it because you are paying with your information.
Speaker 1: You are paying with your clicks. You are telling the
Speaker 1: world important information about your values and how you would
Speaker 1: like to see the world working. Right, So you're saying
Speaker 1: there's a cost in your soul. There's a cost in
Speaker 1: your soul. That's what I'm saying that you're saying. I
Speaker 1: do believe there is, actually and I think that that
Speaker 1: that we should be. We should try to, you know,
Speaker 1: to be honest and kind and and unfair. There should
Speaker 1: be you know, fair trade even important oh here, here, here,
Speaker 1: here on that. So there's that's one important issue. I'm
Speaker 1: glad you brought that up. In terms of the production
Speaker 1: and how a lot of the content is stolen and
Speaker 1: we shouldn't be supporting stolen content. Another question I want
Speaker 1: to talk about is how prevalent do you think exploitation
Speaker 1: is of the actors, you know, in the poor Well,
Speaker 1: it's important to know that they are eighteen, because otherwise
Speaker 1: the producers would be charged by the law, so they
Speaker 1: are very careful to make sure that people are actually eighteen.
Speaker 1: Then there's another aspect of it, and it's that they
Speaker 1: many many producers make them look like they were younger,
Speaker 1: you know, which I honestly don't think is a very
Speaker 1: ethical thing to do. But it's important to separate what's
Speaker 1: legal and what's not. Yeah, they don't know exactly what
Speaker 1: they're getting into, and they maybe sign a contract or something,
Speaker 1: and they sort of feel pressured to do certain acts
Speaker 1: they don't want to do. And I'm just wondering how
Speaker 1: prevalent that was, because I am generally concerned about that. Well,
Speaker 1: I think that is something that's happening in a lot
Speaker 1: of industries, not only in the poor industry. Young people
Speaker 1: are obviously, you know, being exploited in that sense. It
Speaker 1: happens in the fashion industry a lot. It happens in
Speaker 1: Hollywood quite a lot, you know. It happens. You know,
Speaker 1: It can happen in a law firm when a young
Speaker 1: you know in turn gets in there and it's in
Speaker 1: that kind of of a position where she obviously doesn't
Speaker 1: have any power and getting pushed into different situations. So, yes,
Speaker 1: it happens in this world, and it does happen also
Speaker 1: in the adult industry obviously, But saying that, I think
Speaker 1: at the same time, it's very important to understand that
Speaker 1: it's not the only way that the adult industry is working. Obviously,
Speaker 1: the adult industry is a respectful industry where there's lots
Speaker 1: of people working that are adult and aware and secure
Speaker 1: about themselves and doing this kline of work because it's
Speaker 1: something that they really like and where they believe that
Speaker 1: they are earning a fair amount of money for their time.
Speaker 1: Because in the end, we are talking about a labor
Speaker 1: relationship obviously, right where you are exchanging your work for money.
Speaker 1: This is a capitalistic world we live in, and that
Speaker 1: is how it works. But I think that the adult
Speaker 1: industry in general have been trying very hard lately to
Speaker 1: make sure that they are getting better standards for performers,
Speaker 1: more guidelines, more kind of bills of rights, so people
Speaker 1: are aware of what rights they have. But there will
Speaker 1: always there will obviously there will always be bad Apple center,
Speaker 1: And how do you know what you're watching is a
Speaker 1: bad Apple or not? Is your argument that at least
Speaker 1: if someone goes to Erica Lost Films, they know with
Speaker 1: the brand that that there's no risk, Is that what
Speaker 1: you're saying? Yeah, I mean you can only obviously care
Speaker 1: for the people exactly that I'm working with. I cannot
Speaker 1: assure anyone outside my company, and I've got my production
Speaker 1: so that but you know what, what what I would
Speaker 1: add to consumers If you are a consumer and you
Speaker 1: feel worried about this aspect, which I think you should
Speaker 1: definitely I agree with you one hundred percent. I think
Speaker 1: you should try to inform yourself. I think that you
Speaker 1: should check the websites where you are navigating, if there's
Speaker 1: an about page, if there's anyone responsible, if there are
Speaker 1: people actually, you know, with a name and a picture
Speaker 1: and an interview where you can listen to their values
Speaker 1: and understand who they are. If you can watch a
Speaker 1: making off from that film shooting to see how were
Speaker 1: the action actors actually treated, you know, so you get
Speaker 1: an idea how is this company working? Right? What are
Speaker 1: their standards, they're working standards, and maybe you can you
Speaker 1: can watch an interview with that performer that you are,
Speaker 1: you know, watching, and you can make sure that that's
Speaker 1: a person that you feel is in a good place
Speaker 1: doing the job she or he is doing because they
Speaker 1: want to do it right. So that's also I think
Speaker 1: part of your responsibility as a consumer to make sure
Speaker 1: that the adult content that that you are consuming is
Speaker 1: within your standards. That's a great answer. I have so
Speaker 1: many questions for you. I just you see me, I
Speaker 1: don't I talk and I talk and I talk. Well,
Speaker 1: I think you're it's so obvious, you're so passionate about this,
Speaker 1: and it's almost like you were born to do this,
Speaker 1: like this is your purpose, it's your mission, it's it's
Speaker 1: it's so clear. It has become that really. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: it's so clear. But you know also, I mean life happens.
Speaker 1: I mean for me, really, this this this has been
Speaker 1: along journey, and I mean it started many many years
Speaker 1: ago when I was a young, a young woman trying
Speaker 1: to find out who who I was and what I
Speaker 1: wanted in my life and and and I started watch
Speaker 1: porn and back then, you know, I have that feeling
Speaker 1: that something didn't really work for me. And the funny
Speaker 1: thing was that when I started to talk to people
Speaker 1: around me, to you know, my my female friends and
Speaker 1: my male friends, I realized quite quickly that most of
Speaker 1: my male friends, they were okay with porn. That was
Speaker 1: part of you know what of their sexual life, of
Speaker 1: their sexual experiences. It was just part of it. They
Speaker 1: hadn't really thought about it or reflected on it. It
Speaker 1: was just part of what they did, you know. And
Speaker 1: so many of my female friends had similar feelings to
Speaker 1: mine that somehow we felt left out. We were not
Speaker 1: really the center of you know, of the porn. Somehow,
Speaker 1: we were supposed to be the beautiful object. We were
Speaker 1: supposed to be there to seduce and to be sexy
Speaker 1: and to be you know, wonderful and to have all
Speaker 1: the fake orgasms a but it wasn't really you know,
Speaker 1: about our pleasure. And for me, that's that's kind of
Speaker 1: how how how all of this started, you know, I
Speaker 1: wanted to try It was an experiment, really. I tried
Speaker 1: to make a film to see would it be possible
Speaker 1: to make, you know, an adult film where I could
Speaker 1: actually kind of picture myself, where I could identify with
Speaker 1: the female character and where I could you know, could
Speaker 1: could could feel that the sex was equal and it
Speaker 1: was what was happening, was was all right, and that
Speaker 1: it felt good for her, because that's also something that
Speaker 1: I'm really missing out on when when, you know, sometimes
Speaker 1: I go to these tube sides to check out what
Speaker 1: is happening, you know, and I see all these women
Speaker 1: having all these fake orgasms without even touching them self,
Speaker 1: and I feel upset because I know that today, you know,
Speaker 1: porn has become sex education, whether we like it or not,
Speaker 1: that's reality. That's how it works. You know, all these
Speaker 1: young people who haven't never they haven't touched another person,
Speaker 1: they never been with another person, but they watch so
Speaker 1: much porn and then they start believe that what they
Speaker 1: see online is how sex should be performed. And it's
Speaker 1: not true. It's just not true. You know, all men
Speaker 1: are not you know, sex machine, penetrated sex machine getting
Speaker 1: in there like ah, babe, come, you know that's not
Speaker 1: how it works, and all women are not this kind
Speaker 1: of you know, hey here, hey man, have bin will
Speaker 1: when you fuck me? You know, that's not who we are.
Speaker 1: So I would like to see, you know, I would
Speaker 1: like to see my world portrait in adult films, you know,
Speaker 1: my world where people that I find sexy are getting
Speaker 1: together having a good time. You know, that was kind
Speaker 1: of that's that's that's why I started to do this.
Speaker 1: So then it has become even even more because I
Speaker 1: you know, it became really activism for me. And as
Speaker 1: I also in this process during these years, you know,
Speaker 1: became a mother and now I have two daughters, Oh
Speaker 1: my god, and I just feel, you know, they need
Speaker 1: the world need better sex films. You know, we need
Speaker 1: something else. We need an alternative to all that shit
Speaker 1: that's out there. Yeah, healthier kind of growth oriented that's
Speaker 1: my phrase. You know, that's like a very human I'm
Speaker 1: a humanistic psychologist. That's you know, growth oriented kind of
Speaker 1: pouring that kind of a bliss us and makes us
Speaker 1: feel ultimately more satisfied for ourselves and our partners, is
Speaker 1: what I'm seeing on your site. And the wonderful thing
Speaker 1: with cinema is that it has this capacity to make
Speaker 1: you understand the other people, to connect with other people
Speaker 1: with their desires and and and and just you know,
Speaker 1: suddenly the world becomes bigger than just your little sexuality
Speaker 1: kind of you know, because it's so easy to think
Speaker 1: that what you are is the way that everybody is,
Speaker 1: and it's I think it's really enriching to watch other
Speaker 1: people doing other stuff, and you know, people outside your
Speaker 1: own GM genre and you know, kind of coming together
Speaker 1: and and you say, wow, can sex be all of
Speaker 1: those different things? Maybe I'm interested in something I didn't
Speaker 1: even know I was going to be interested in. You know,
Speaker 1: it's it's challenging, it's it's it's I think it's just wonderful.
Speaker 1: How it can help you explore more about yourself can
Speaker 1: probably be a good way of exploring your the full
Speaker 1: depths of your wants and desires as well as other
Speaker 1: parts of your psyche that don't even have to do
Speaker 1: with sex, but sex gets, you know, attached to it.
Speaker 1: There's a study that David Buss and Cindy Meston did
Speaker 1: on why people have sex, and there was so there was,
Speaker 1: like over I think five hundred and six hundred different
Speaker 1: things they had distilled into different categories. But people basically
Speaker 1: have sex for every kind of human need. One could
Speaker 1: you know that that is on offer among humans? Maybe
Speaker 1: it's just self esteem, maybe it's revenge, maybe it's for love.
Speaker 1: You know, in intancy, there's different reasons why people are
Speaker 1: interested in sex. Of course, power, money, power, yeah, love,
Speaker 1: There's so many things. You know, humans are so complex
Speaker 1: and sex seems to fulfill a wide variety of psychological drives.
Speaker 1: You know, I would love to unpack with you this
Speaker 1: word objectification. I'm really trying my head around this because
Speaker 1: it's still objective even in your movies. This is what
Speaker 1: the field is. I mean, you're objectifying in the sense
Speaker 1: in one sense, you're focusing on the sexual demean the body.
Speaker 1: How much of your stories, I mean really expound on
Speaker 1: the personality of the actor and they're wants and dreams
Speaker 1: in life? Do you know me? It's still pornography in
Speaker 1: one sense of its People are going there to look
Speaker 1: for sex or else that go somewhere else? Do they
Speaker 1: go to the movies? You know, I'm trying to think
Speaker 1: about this very rationally, right, So, like, what is what
Speaker 1: is the difference in the kind of objectification happening in
Speaker 1: your movies versus the kind happening Because maybe that's the
Speaker 1: level of nuance that I'd like to have about this. Well.
Speaker 1: I also think it depends a lot on the movie.
Speaker 1: You know, I already I made so many different movies
Speaker 1: and every situation is different. So it's I cannot really
Speaker 1: give you a forum allowed where I say this is
Speaker 1: the way I do it. You know, it all depends
Speaker 1: on the film and the situation and what we are
Speaker 1: trying to show in those circumstances, and on the performers,
Speaker 1: because what I try to do a lot is you know,
Speaker 1: talking to performers, connecting with performers, trying to understand who
Speaker 1: they are, what they like, what what what what, who
Speaker 1: they would like to work with, you know, because that
Speaker 1: is I've come to the conclusion that the best situations
Speaker 1: is when you set up people who really wants to
Speaker 1: work together, you know, when you have people who already
Speaker 1: have that chemistry, people who are desiring each other, people
Speaker 1: who are good friends, people who are you know, I
Speaker 1: mean porn performers they have they have you know, favorite
Speaker 1: co workers, the same as the rest of us, you know.
Speaker 1: So that's that's something that that's that's that we're trying
Speaker 1: to work on. When it comes to objectification, I mean,
Speaker 1: obviously I'm trying to shoo sex so it looks hot
Speaker 1: because I want I want. I mean, my my ideas
Speaker 1: with my films is to turn you on obviously that's
Speaker 1: that's what we are looking for. At the same time,
Speaker 1: sometimes we want to challenge you. Sometimes we want you
Speaker 1: to you know, start thinking about other things. I mean,
Speaker 1: just because it's a film based on the idea to
Speaker 1: turn you on, that doesn't mean that it can't be
Speaker 1: anything else at the same time. So one part of
Speaker 1: the work is obviously very visual, where we're talking about
Speaker 1: you know, what to show and how to show it
Speaker 1: and in what light, and you know from what angle
Speaker 1: and how to frame it, and all the cinematic work
Speaker 1: that's in there. And then when we get into to
Speaker 1: the you know, to the catting and the editing, how
Speaker 1: are we going to put these images together to get
Speaker 1: a good rhythm and to make them, you know, even
Speaker 1: better than the maybe what it was at the actual shooting.
Speaker 1: So that's one part. But the other part, I think
Speaker 1: is it's kind of to try to get to understand
Speaker 1: our characters and try to to get to that point
Speaker 1: where it's not only about showing their bodies, but it's
Speaker 1: also about understanding how they connect with each other and
Speaker 1: their personal kind of emotional journey in that story, and
Speaker 1: and and to try somehow to portray that moment of intimacy.
Speaker 1: You know, how how can can you? Can you see that? Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's it's fascinating, I think, but but you know, you
Speaker 1: you see lengths of it. Sometimes sometimes it's not there,
Speaker 1: and sometimes it's just all over the place. It's it's
Speaker 1: you can't really, you know, touch it, but when you
Speaker 1: see it, you have this feeling that that it's there. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I think the research does show that the most satisfying
Speaker 1: sexual experiences are those where there's some sense of care
Speaker 1: attached to it. I could send you the studies. There's
Speaker 1: some even just affectionate touching. It doesn't have to be
Speaker 1: like you're in love with the person. No, no, of
Speaker 1: course not. But you see what I'm saying. You know,
Speaker 1: the research shows that just even just if there's just
Speaker 1: care somewhat in the situation, people report self report having
Speaker 1: the most sexual experiences, and not only that, but they
Speaker 1: report having more meaning in life. So, actually, my colleague
Speaker 1: Todd Kashton did a study recently showing that sex with
Speaker 1: this kind of affection can actually increase one's reports of
Speaker 1: meaning in life the next day. And I think that's
Speaker 1: kind of it's beautiful. But we are all, I think,
Speaker 1: as human beings we are all very thirsty for affection
Speaker 1: then for feeling that we are cared for and that
Speaker 1: we are special, and that I mean, it's obviously something
Speaker 1: that that we we want. We you know, I agree,
Speaker 1: but whether regardless of whether or not you're male or female,
Speaker 1: obviously we all want that. I thought you made a
Speaker 1: really good point early in our conversation. You made up
Speaker 1: when you made a lot of good points today. There
Speaker 1: were one of your good points early in the conversation.
Speaker 1: You said something that I've been thinking a lot about.
Speaker 1: And I think that we objectify in the kind of
Speaker 1: we'll call the standard model of porn. It objectifies men too.
Speaker 1: It's it's it's like equally objectifying both men and women.
Speaker 1: It reduces men to just a fifty inch penis. You know.
Speaker 1: So I'm wondering because I did some research, you know,
Speaker 1: watching you know, your free my free trial you all,
Speaker 1: you and your production team gave me, and and maybe
Speaker 1: I thought a little too much about it. I was,
Speaker 1: I was watching these movies. I was I was doing
Speaker 1: like my own analysis of things. Can I just tell
Speaker 1: you some things I'd like to see more of? Like
Speaker 1: you know, in terms of ethical porn, that is what
Speaker 1: is so great. That's what I love so much when people,
Speaker 1: you know, can give us feedback and tell us I
Speaker 1: would love to see more of this. I would like
Speaker 1: you know that that changes everything. That's what we need.
Speaker 1: We need to hear more of those honest you know. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I think a lot of young men watch porn and
Speaker 1: they start to get body dysmorphic issues. You know, this
Speaker 1: can happen to men too, you know, you watch a
Speaker 1: lot of porn of you think that your inferior if
Speaker 1: your penis isn't fifty inches right. And I didn't see
Speaker 1: I didn't see much variability even on your site in
Speaker 1: terms of penis size for men. So that's one thing
Speaker 1: I wonder you know, what you what you could do
Speaker 1: and that along those lines cut them off. No, no,
Speaker 1: but I'm kidding. I'm kidding. But you know, it's something
Speaker 1: that we talk about sometimes and and what happens is
Speaker 1: that so many of the male performers are people with
Speaker 1: particularly big penises that it's kind of the way it is,
Speaker 1: you know. So it's it's not that easy. It's not
Speaker 1: with men. It's not that easy to find the people
Speaker 1: who are willing to do this kind of work and
Speaker 1: who are not. You know, that's a really good point,
Speaker 1: and I can totally totally see that I'm trying to
Speaker 1: think of. You know, I really like this idea of
Speaker 1: equality of sexual enjoyment in the in these porn in
Speaker 1: these porn movies that to me, I find it very
Speaker 1: hot when there's a real exchange of energy, you know,
Speaker 1: and it looks it looks like they're both really really
Speaker 1: like aroused. You know. I think that the pendulum can
Speaker 1: swing from one to the other and then we still
Speaker 1: have the same the same thing going on. So in
Speaker 1: the one sense, you can have this from a male perspective,
Speaker 1: and it would make sense from a male perspective that
Speaker 1: the focus would be on male pleasure because you know,
Speaker 1: all humans are pretty much selfish, so you could you
Speaker 1: could make the same argument that the pendulum could swing
Speaker 1: the other way, where from a female perspective it's the
Speaker 1: focuses on female pleasure. But that's still the same thing.
Speaker 1: It's still we're talking about, you know what is the
Speaker 1: fantasy from a women's perpective, was the fantasy from a
Speaker 1: male perspective, this more of equality. It seems really cool
Speaker 1: and you and you're getting at that of well, it's
Speaker 1: not just about one person's pleasure to the exclusion of
Speaker 1: the others. To me, that that seems more more. You know,
Speaker 1: we don't need to call feminist poor nor masculins. You know,
Speaker 1: it's just you know what, when when I say, for example,
Speaker 1: when I use the term feminist poor, and if we
Speaker 1: talk about that, what I'm talking about really is having women,
Speaker 1: you know, participating behind the camera. That's for me, that's
Speaker 1: one of the most important components when I'm talking about
Speaker 1: feminist porn, and then it's about it's about, you know,
Speaker 1: how we are representing people on the screen. And I'm
Speaker 1: not only talking about women there. I'm talking about everyone,
Speaker 1: about all different genders that's out there, you know. I'm
Speaker 1: talking about how we are, how we are seeing the sex,
Speaker 1: how who is initiating, who's taking action, who's taking care
Speaker 1: of themselves, et cetera, et cetera. It's the whole package.
Speaker 1: It's when I say feminist porn, I don't mean a
Speaker 1: bunch of you know, women, ugly looking women with hair
Speaker 1: under their arms and strap ons getting out into the
Speaker 1: world saying hey, now we've gotta fuckle the men in
Speaker 1: their butts, you know. But obviously that is what some
Speaker 1: of the people, I'm sure to and I wasn't imagining that,
Speaker 1: you know, I was, for the record, I was not
Speaker 1: imagining now I can't help well, no, no, I was like, no,
Speaker 1: thank you, now that you've put that in my head.
Speaker 1: I just love that you're so open to just talk
Speaker 1: about this with me critically. I'm just I really want
Speaker 1: to think through this, because yeah, I do think that
Speaker 1: there is such great value in what you're doing. I
Speaker 1: want to say that first and foremost, there's great value
Speaker 1: in presenting mutual satisfaction and enjoyment and what a healthy
Speaker 1: sexual relationship tends to look like in the actual real world.
Speaker 1: I love that. I do think that we're constrained a
Speaker 1: little bit of by human nature. All this is not
Speaker 1: cultural as well. There are some things that we evolve
Speaker 1: to find really hot that might not be politically correct,
Speaker 1: and I think that's I think that we need to
Speaker 1: grapple with that. Honestly too, I do notice even in
Speaker 1: your movies, I mean, the actors, they're all still really hot,
Speaker 1: I mean physically, you know, Like I mean, I couldn't
Speaker 1: find one video of yours on your site where you
Speaker 1: had like a couple that and maybe rightly so, who
Speaker 1: would who would who would still want to watch it?
Speaker 1: If you know, if you had like two of the
Speaker 1: ugliest people on the planet having sex with each other, like,
Speaker 1: is that going to get many views and purchases on it?
Speaker 1: So I think, you know, just having an open eyes
Speaker 1: conversation about like just how far can you take changing
Speaker 1: it without where you go up against human nature? And
Speaker 1: what what the demand is? Do you know what I'm saying? Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: but but but also what you're saying now, like ugly
Speaker 1: people are like agly people poorn? What what even? What
Speaker 1: is that? You know? I mean that's not we are
Speaker 1: I mean we are trying to find people who look different,
Speaker 1: you know, in all possible sense of what different means.
Speaker 1: You know, I have lots of women, for example, with
Speaker 1: with fuller body types. We even have some men, not
Speaker 1: many maybe maybe maybe you know, maybe one isn't there,
Speaker 1: you know, because it's but again here I come back
Speaker 1: to the same with men. It's so difficult, you know.
Speaker 1: I would like to challenge your audience to think about it,
Speaker 1: you know, and men who are out there who are
Speaker 1: feeling this way, who are feeling why are we not represented? Honestly?
Speaker 1: You are not represented because you are not out there.
Speaker 1: I am trying to find different people. But then remember
Speaker 1: that we are also talking here about movies where we
Speaker 1: are actually shooting explicit sex. So that's a situation where
Speaker 1: a man is gonna have to hold a direction for
Speaker 1: a while to be able to, you know, shoot this movie.
Speaker 1: And it's not easy. I worked with first timers, I
Speaker 1: worked with some newcomers, and almost every time, you know,
Speaker 1: it takes hours before or we get there. So when
Speaker 1: I do that kind of of of a shooting, I
Speaker 1: have to plan very differently than when I'm working with
Speaker 1: an experienced adult performer, where I can you know, imagine
Speaker 1: that the sex will be shot maybe in forty minutes,
Speaker 1: and we're gonna do it between you know, that hour
Speaker 1: and that hour, and then we're getting into another thing.
Speaker 1: When I'm shooting with newcomers or even you know, couples
Speaker 1: that I do sometimes who have not you know, shot
Speaker 1: adult content before, I need to have you know, the
Speaker 1: whole day just for the sex because I know that
Speaker 1: there will probably have to be a pause and you know,
Speaker 1: we we're gonna have to to do something else and
Speaker 1: then get back to it. Because people get stage frightened,
Speaker 1: they get nervous you see that before. I've seen it.
Speaker 1: I've seen it again and again and again. And I
Speaker 1: can tell you even even men who probably are wonderful
Speaker 1: lovers in you know, in real life and who had
Speaker 1: a lot of different partners and who are secure about themselves,
Speaker 1: suddenly when they end up in front of camera teine
Speaker 1: at the shooting, there the nervous system somehow breaks down.
Speaker 1: And some of that's but that's part of real life too.
Speaker 1: And I just wonder, like, why not have some movies
Speaker 1: that shows that quote, you know, difficulty. Why does all
Speaker 1: porn have to if you if you want to aquity
Speaker 1: represent Yeah, yeah, it's a it's a great it's a
Speaker 1: great subject and we need to talk about it. And
Speaker 1: I actually on if you go to my site Thesada,
Speaker 1: I watch different films, you will see after a while
Speaker 1: that there are some films where the penetrative sex, for example,
Speaker 1: didn't work out that well. And then we concentrate on
Speaker 1: something else, you know, we get into a wonderful coney linguist.
Speaker 1: We do something friend see that feels real to me,
Speaker 1: that feels really real to me and important to show
Speaker 1: both young men and women, you know how, you know
Speaker 1: how sex doesn't always have to be this, you know,
Speaker 1: a static orgasmic experience on the first try. Yeah. Yeah,
Speaker 1: because that's what people think, you know, and and and
Speaker 1: it's also what somehow what porn has made us believe.
Speaker 1: You know, we think that it's just an you know,
Speaker 1: and or gasmic explosion at the same time. Yeah, right,
Speaker 1: or as you said, you know, just vaginal intercourse. You know,
Speaker 1: there's there's It's really funny because when you talk about sex,
Speaker 1: that's what people think as sex, you know, they when
Speaker 1: when you say you can have other kinds of sex,
Speaker 1: they're like, what what is that? How do I do that?
Speaker 1: You know, if you can really expand that, you'll be
Speaker 1: doing a great thing. I think, you know, the full
Speaker 1: report of what falls into the un brew of sexual
Speaker 1: activity I think is far richer and deeper than then
Speaker 1: we give people credit. I mean, you're saying the same thing,
Speaker 1: so so we agree in that, but you're credit. Yeah, yeah, no,
Speaker 1: we definitely agree in that. I would, yeah, I would,
Speaker 1: just I would also like to open up a space
Speaker 1: more for men who find those kinds of movies hot,
Speaker 1: your kinds of movies hot as well. I guess I'm
Speaker 1: all about true and true inclusivity, if that makes sense
Speaker 1: in a sense, not like you know, well that this
Speaker 1: is this is movies for women from a women perspective
Speaker 1: as well. You know, ultimately we're all in this together.
Speaker 1: I am in all the other general agree with you,
Speaker 1: and I think one of the problems also with the
Speaker 1: adult industry somehow is that most of the content that
Speaker 1: we have seen has been made by a very small
Speaker 1: group of men. Actually, you know, that are very similar.
Speaker 1: It's not like we have lots of different creators from
Speaker 1: different even if they are men, you know, most of them,
Speaker 1: they're the same guy. You know, even if he comes
Speaker 1: from Barcelona or Los Angeles or Buena Cyres or Budapest
Speaker 1: or you know, London or Berlin, it's the same guy.
Speaker 1: He likes you know, tits and ass and his car
Speaker 1: and his cigar and Pom pom. And that's the point
Speaker 1: he makes. I mean, obviously, I think that the adult
Speaker 1: industry needs lots of women because our voices have not
Speaker 1: really been heard, But it also needs lots of other
Speaker 1: people with other perspectives, including you know, including men, including
Speaker 1: white heterosexual middle aged men, but with another perspective. Sure, no,
Speaker 1: for sure, I think opening up the table for more perspectives,
Speaker 1: both for men and women is going to be a
Speaker 1: plus for society in general. Absolutely. Would you like to
Speaker 1: end here with telling me about some of your projects,
Speaker 1: you know, EX Confessions for instance, tell us ex Confessions
Speaker 1: is it's my love, it's my love. I love ex Confession.
Speaker 1: It's it's it's wonderful because it's it's it's actually a
Speaker 1: product where anyone can write anonymously their story, their sex, fantasy, kinks,
Speaker 1: they have things they want to see, your things they
Speaker 1: have done. And then what I do together with my
Speaker 1: team of filmmakers from all around the world, because we
Speaker 1: are now fifty filmmakers making different short films for the site,
Speaker 1: we picked these stories and we make films out of them.
Speaker 1: So you can participate, you know, and then you can
Speaker 1: comment and you can tell me what do you want
Speaker 1: to see? Okay, yeah, you can. You can tell me
Speaker 1: your story I make you wow, Wow, I'm so exciting.
Speaker 1: Oh where can our listeners go? X confiend dot com. Okay,
Speaker 1: as easy as that. And you can also, you know,
Speaker 1: you can have a peek. You can look at all
Speaker 1: the trailers that's out there, and and if you sign
Speaker 1: up onto a newsletter. You're going to get great offers
Speaker 1: to get onto the site and free trials as you
Speaker 1: said before, and all of that stuff, you know, so
Speaker 1: you can you can dare to come and you can
Speaker 1: look and we have making offs, we have interviews with actors.
Speaker 1: You know, there's thousands of confessions to read what other
Speaker 1: people have written and watch all these all these films
Speaker 1: that's online. Okay, so that's one ex confessions. Tell me
Speaker 1: about Erotic films. Tell me about that. Oh, Erotic films
Speaker 1: is for for people who are not into explicit films,
Speaker 1: who doesn't want to watch penetrations and penises and vaginas
Speaker 1: and bulvas, et cetera. They just want to watch something
Speaker 1: that is more essential, but they do want to see,
Speaker 1: you know that the situation and the attraction and the
Speaker 1: passion and all of that part. They should go to
Speaker 1: erotic films dot com and they will not be bothered
Speaker 1: by nasty pop ups and stuff they don't want you
Speaker 1: trade in front of their eyes, you know. And it's
Speaker 1: also a site that I know that some you know,
Speaker 1: younger people are interested in because it's not explicit. So
Speaker 1: I have some I have some friends who have you know,
Speaker 1: teens who let them watch it sometimes and then I
Speaker 1: have I also have online Last Cinema dot Com, which
Speaker 1: is a cinema online with kind of feature films and
Speaker 1: serious it's adult content, but they are I would say
Speaker 1: it's it's maybe it's more like American style studio because
Speaker 1: we work a lot with American performers, American directors, and
Speaker 1: most of the directors are are women. And I think
Speaker 1: that that the stories are intriguing. It's the kind of
Speaker 1: stories to know where you get to know what character
Speaker 1: and you want to watch more about what is happening
Speaker 1: to these characters. Yeah. I saw one of these Australian
Speaker 1: films that was so super interesting, Like I was engrossed
Speaker 1: in the plot. This woman stole this guy's car and
Speaker 1: anyway whatever, Okay, So it was really Actually if you're
Speaker 1: tired of Netflix, you know you can. It was actually
Speaker 1: a good movie. It was actually a good movie, and
Speaker 1: it was it was hot, for sure, it was hot.
Speaker 1: I mean I'd be lying if I said it wasn't right.
Speaker 1: Tell me a little bit about your nonprofit. I mean,
Speaker 1: you're a busy person over there. You also started a
Speaker 1: nonprofit called The Porn Conversation. Is that yep? Yep, I did.
Speaker 1: That's's let's be call I'm a parent, you know, and
Speaker 1: it's because I'm a parent and I have the job
Speaker 1: I have. I had so many you know, other parents
Speaker 1: coming up to me saying, hey, Erica, how do you
Speaker 1: do it? Like, what do you tell your daughters? How
Speaker 1: do you I mean, what should we do? The world?
Speaker 1: You know, porn is out there, It's destroying all our kids.
Speaker 1: What how are we gonna face this? You know? And
Speaker 1: then I realized that actually, I'm definitely not the only
Speaker 1: one who have to have the porn conversation with my daughters,
Speaker 1: because we are all going to have to have that
Speaker 1: conversation sooner or later. And if we don't have it,
Speaker 1: we leave it to the tube, sides online to have
Speaker 1: it with our kids. So I could totally rege or
Speaker 1: the boyfriends or their boyfriends or their boyfriends or their
Speaker 1: girlfriends or your girlfriends. Yes, because because the world today,
Speaker 1: you know, it's very different from when I grow up.
Speaker 1: You know, I'm I was born in seventy seven, and
Speaker 1: when I grow up, it was difficult to find porn.
Speaker 1: You know, it was not it was not on any
Speaker 1: mobile or iPad or computer out there. I you know
Speaker 1: had to I had to straggle to get there. Oh
Speaker 1: I know, trust me, I was born and not seventy nine.
Speaker 1: You know, you know I had to wait. I had
Speaker 1: to wait an hour for a jift to fully load
Speaker 1: of Sydney Crawford wearing a beating suit. Well, I didn't
Speaker 1: even see. I didn't even see that. I was. It
Speaker 1: was like I like in a bathing suit. You know, No,
Speaker 1: I hear you. But so I think it's I think
Speaker 1: it's the idea with the with the porn Conversation dot org.
Speaker 1: It's to orient orient parents, especially how to have these conversations.
Speaker 1: So it's a site where you can download different PDF
Speaker 1: files for different age groups because obviously it's very different
Speaker 1: if your kid is nine or if your kid is sixteen.
Speaker 1: You know. But I would recommend you to talk about it.
Speaker 1: I would recommend you to don't be shy about it.
Speaker 1: I would recommend you to to to not judge, but
Speaker 1: to tell them how you feel about it, how you
Speaker 1: feel about about you know, the chauvinistic the chauvinistic style
Speaker 1: that's really out on that site. Oh boy, well, thank
Speaker 1: you so much Erica for chatting with me today, and
Speaker 1: I wish you and your mission in the world very well.
Speaker 1: And I hope that that all of us can can
Speaker 1: learn to have healthier, more positive and fulfilling, satisfying sex
Speaker 1: with each other. I definitely hope so. And now with
Speaker 1: all the virus situation we have in the world, what
Speaker 1: else are we gonna do? It's like we can't be
Speaker 1: one meter from each other? Or is it too so?
Speaker 1: I mean, have you gotten any ballback from like some
Speaker 1: of these mainstream pornographers of what you're doing as any
Speaker 1: of them criticized it? It It all of course. I mean,
Speaker 1: if you if you stand out then and you do
Speaker 1: something different than you are, you know, criticizing part of
Speaker 1: the industry, obviously there will be people criticizing you. But also,
Speaker 1: I mean, this is this is no news. I'm a woman,
Speaker 1: I'm you know, talking my mind. I'm there will always
Speaker 1: be people not liking me, and I will have to
Speaker 1: accept that. It's one of the hardest things in life.
Speaker 1: And once we can do it, you know, it's it,
Speaker 1: Diski's the limit, you know, once we can fully accept that,
Speaker 1: that's gonna be Well, you go, Erica lust and you go,
Speaker 1: I'm going to go and make some dinner for my girls.
Speaker 1: That's great. Thanks so much for chatting with me with
Speaker 1: me today, have a great day. Thank you very much.
Speaker 1: Thanks for listening to this episode of the Psychology Podcast.
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