WEBVTT - Is Uncle Larry Reachable or Teachable? 0:00:00.400 --> 0:00:04.520 I won't let my body out out well everything that 0:00:04.640 --> 0:00:07.920 I'm made do, won't spend my life trying to change. 0:00:08.640 --> 0:00:12.440 I'm learning to love who I am. I get I'm strong, 0:00:12.840 --> 0:00:15.840 I feel free, I know who every part of me 0:00:16.480 --> 0:00:24.000 it's beautiful and then will always out way if you 0:00:24.079 --> 0:00:28.400 feel it with yours in there, she's love to the boom. There, 0:00:28.560 --> 0:00:33.320 let's say good day and did you and die out. 0:00:35.040 --> 0:00:37.560 Lisa and I are super excited to have Sam private 0:00:37.640 --> 0:00:40.800 join us for today's episode. She is a dietitian that 0:00:41.000 --> 0:00:43.920 is creating change in her own little bubble, but also 0:00:43.960 --> 0:00:47.040 in the Instagram world because that's where I found you, Sam, 0:00:47.120 --> 0:00:48.960 and I'm so glad I did. I don't even know 0:00:49.120 --> 0:00:51.440 how or who reposted you, but I'm sure I saw 0:00:51.479 --> 0:00:53.559 one of your funny reels that you put up that 0:00:53.640 --> 0:00:56.880 are very attention getting, and I love that you use 0:00:56.960 --> 0:01:00.880 your creativity to bring awareness to something that's super important. 0:01:00.920 --> 0:01:03.800 And it's diet culture and all the things that we 0:01:03.880 --> 0:01:07.040 have that reigned upon us for years and years and years. 0:01:07.040 --> 0:01:09.640 That I know you and Lisa both being dietitians in 0:01:09.680 --> 0:01:13.000 that world, it's probably a constant struggle. So talk with 0:01:13.120 --> 0:01:15.880 us about how diet culture has played a role in 0:01:15.959 --> 0:01:17.679 your career, and then what you try to do for 0:01:17.800 --> 0:01:21.760 clients online like your Instagram world, but also professionally in 0:01:21.840 --> 0:01:24.280 your workspace. Well, thank you so much for having me. 0:01:24.280 --> 0:01:27.039 And it's so awesome that social media can connect people 0:01:27.120 --> 0:01:30.000 from from all over. But for me, you know, I 0:01:30.040 --> 0:01:33.240 wasn't always an anti diet dietitian, and I think a 0:01:33.240 --> 0:01:35.959 lot of dietitians can relate to that. Is that we 0:01:36.000 --> 0:01:39.880 are classically trained in diet culture. We are trained to 0:01:40.040 --> 0:01:42.520 use weight loss as our party trick of how we 0:01:42.560 --> 0:01:45.360 can be air quotes helpful for people that are not 0:01:45.400 --> 0:01:47.840 watching this and listening. And so I spent a lot 0:01:47.880 --> 0:01:51.320 of time counseling when I started as a dietitian, counseling 0:01:51.360 --> 0:01:54.040 people in weight loss and weight management, and I truly 0:01:54.080 --> 0:01:56.560 thought that I was helping people. I honestly thought that, 0:01:56.560 --> 0:01:58.320 and I think that's why we go into this field 0:01:58.320 --> 0:02:00.400 as a dietitian, as we want to help bol and 0:02:00.400 --> 0:02:03.760 we're also seeking that answer of life, of happiness and 0:02:03.840 --> 0:02:05.720 health and all these things when really there is no 0:02:05.760 --> 0:02:08.679 magic answer that's the answer. So I was doing, you know, 0:02:08.760 --> 0:02:12.160 weight loss counseling and whatnot, and then I recognized that 0:02:12.200 --> 0:02:15.119 people would see short term success and then they would 0:02:15.160 --> 0:02:16.840 go off on their merry way and they would come 0:02:16.880 --> 0:02:20.320 back a few months feeling distraught, you know, feeling guilty 0:02:20.360 --> 0:02:24.080 and shameful, reaching out to me and saying like I failed, Sammy, 0:02:24.160 --> 0:02:25.799 I need you to help me. I need I need 0:02:25.800 --> 0:02:27.480 to tune up, you know, I need to check in. 0:02:27.720 --> 0:02:29.400 And I would see that over and over and I said, 0:02:29.480 --> 0:02:32.640 something's not right here, like this isn't helping anyone. And 0:02:32.680 --> 0:02:35.920 it wasn't until I found Intuitive Eating, which I'm also 0:02:36.000 --> 0:02:38.640 a certified into it of eating counselor trained under Evil 0:02:38.680 --> 0:02:41.360 and Tripoli and at least Rash, the authors of the book, 0:02:41.480 --> 0:02:43.800 where I was able to see that really, if we 0:02:43.840 --> 0:02:47.320 can help people make peace with food first, make peace 0:02:47.360 --> 0:02:50.000 with their body, then we can get to the part 0:02:50.040 --> 0:02:52.920 that dietitians think about of nutrition and things that genuinely 0:02:52.960 --> 0:02:55.480 improve our health. But if everything that we do is 0:02:55.560 --> 0:02:58.720 so rooted and guilt and shame, it's really hard to 0:02:58.720 --> 0:03:01.800 start to make behavior change just for air quotes health 0:03:01.960 --> 0:03:04.160 if everything has a shame wrapped up with it. So 0:03:04.200 --> 0:03:05.880 to go back to your question, I have not always 0:03:05.919 --> 0:03:08.080 been an intuitive eating dietitian. I have not always been 0:03:08.120 --> 0:03:11.560 an intuitive eater and an anti diet dietitian. It's really 0:03:11.560 --> 0:03:14.200 been in the last two years where i've really do've 0:03:14.280 --> 0:03:16.600 been and continued to learn, and we have a team 0:03:16.639 --> 0:03:20.040 now of multiple registered dietitians that are all certified and 0:03:20.080 --> 0:03:22.560 intuitive eating and we help people all over the world 0:03:22.720 --> 0:03:25.040 in our virtual private practice. Yeah. I think what you 0:03:25.080 --> 0:03:27.239 do is awesome, and I love the way you present 0:03:27.320 --> 0:03:31.520 your material online. It really is light and funny, but 0:03:31.919 --> 0:03:35.080 bringing the realness to the conversation but in a way 0:03:35.120 --> 0:03:37.240 that doesn't make people feel bad. And I think that 0:03:37.240 --> 0:03:40.760 that's really the critical component as to you know, why 0:03:40.760 --> 0:03:43.360 people are attracted to you, of course, and and your practice. 0:03:43.360 --> 0:03:45.560 Thank you so much for that. And I think that's 0:03:45.560 --> 0:03:48.360 where TikTok came into play, where you know, we're in 0:03:48.400 --> 0:03:52.160 the midst of this global pandemic and everyone's stuck at 0:03:52.160 --> 0:03:54.400 home and I saw this TikTok app and I was like, no, 0:03:54.880 --> 0:03:57.440 not another app, Like I can't do this, And then 0:03:57.520 --> 0:04:00.480 we started making videos and people were being like you 0:04:00.520 --> 0:04:03.480 said that. The emotional reaction of like laughing and being like, 0:04:03.560 --> 0:04:05.760 oh my gosh, I do that, Like you know what 0:04:05.760 --> 0:04:09.560 I mean, And it's relatable I'm not anti human beings dieting, 0:04:09.600 --> 0:04:12.760 and I think that's where on Instagram things can get 0:04:12.800 --> 0:04:15.400 really sticky, is people can feel shame and guilt for 0:04:15.440 --> 0:04:18.800 their diet history. But we have to go through that 0:04:19.000 --> 0:04:21.279 to be able to get to a place where we're saying, 0:04:21.400 --> 0:04:23.479 I don't want to diet anymore and I don't want 0:04:23.520 --> 0:04:26.440 to do this anymore. This is harmful, And so there's 0:04:26.480 --> 0:04:29.039 no shame in being a chronic dieter that was me 0:04:29.160 --> 0:04:31.640 for eight plus years, but being able to laugh about 0:04:31.640 --> 0:04:33.720 it and say, Okay, how can I move forward? How 0:04:33.760 --> 0:04:36.000 can I change? Love that? And just so that people 0:04:36.000 --> 0:04:38.920 know where to find you on Instagram, you're at find 0:04:39.040 --> 0:04:41.320 dot food dot freedom And is it the same on 0:04:41.320 --> 0:04:44.839 TikTok yep, find food Freedom. No dots on TikTok okay, 0:04:44.880 --> 0:04:47.760 but on Instagram we got the dots. So yes, definitely. 0:04:48.040 --> 0:04:50.520 What we encourage for our listeners to do is to 0:04:50.600 --> 0:04:54.120 follow accounts such as yours so that you have those 0:04:54.160 --> 0:04:58.279 positive reminders in your feed and maybe unfollowed stuff that 0:04:58.400 --> 0:05:01.880 isn't necessarily healthy for you to see, because I feel 0:05:01.880 --> 0:05:03.599 like when you're a post pop up, or if Lisa 0:05:03.600 --> 0:05:06.080 puts up a poster or any other amazing people that 0:05:06.120 --> 0:05:08.320 I've started to follow once I've become part of this 0:05:08.440 --> 0:05:12.839 anti diet culture because I know shame here, chronic dieter 0:05:12.880 --> 0:05:16.640 or all kinds of eating disorders from it. So I 0:05:16.680 --> 0:05:19.760 am right there with a lot of America. And one 0:05:19.760 --> 0:05:21.479 of the reasons why Lisa and I are here talking 0:05:21.480 --> 0:05:23.920 with you is we want to keep having these conversations, 0:05:24.160 --> 0:05:26.760 say that there's no shame, break the stigma around some 0:05:26.880 --> 0:05:29.719 of this stuff. And as we enter into the holiday season, 0:05:30.000 --> 0:05:33.480 I think that that is when diets start to rear 0:05:33.560 --> 0:05:36.240 their head, whatever it looks like, because you maybe have 0:05:36.440 --> 0:05:39.320 wellies a little weird, probably not as many parties, but 0:05:39.400 --> 0:05:42.120 you've got different gatherings to go to where there might 0:05:42.200 --> 0:05:43.760 be this kind of food in this kind of food, 0:05:43.760 --> 0:05:46.560 So you better restrict for five days before you go 0:05:46.640 --> 0:05:49.560 eat your big family meal or juice, the you know, 0:05:49.640 --> 0:05:53.200 some sort of cleans to detox after. And then the 0:05:53.279 --> 0:05:56.000 new year approaches and it's like, okay, new year, knew me, 0:05:56.400 --> 0:05:58.320 and it just seems like the last few months of 0:05:58.320 --> 0:06:00.200 the year, and then as we enter a new year, 0:06:00.200 --> 0:06:02.320 it's a vicious cycle and I was a part of it. 0:06:02.320 --> 0:06:04.120 It was almost like I could predict how I was 0:06:04.120 --> 0:06:07.599 going to be November December, January, November December just binge 0:06:07.640 --> 0:06:11.200 like crazy January clans and then end up binging again 0:06:11.240 --> 0:06:14.280 because my body was hungry. So talk with us about 0:06:14.520 --> 0:06:17.280 what insight do you have to offer to navigate through 0:06:17.320 --> 0:06:20.120 the holidays without doing what I just said that I 0:06:20.160 --> 0:06:22.839 did for years. Yes, well, I think it's one thing 0:06:23.279 --> 0:06:26.600 to recognize is that's very conclusive with the evidence. We 0:06:26.720 --> 0:06:30.159 know that restriction is the number one indicator of binging. 0:06:30.400 --> 0:06:32.560 So a lot of times there's a lot of shame 0:06:32.800 --> 0:06:34.680 tied to binging, and people are saying, you know, when 0:06:34.720 --> 0:06:37.880 you're in that binge, you say, I'm never going to 0:06:37.960 --> 0:06:40.039 do this again, like this is it that creates that 0:06:40.200 --> 0:06:43.400 urgency to eat even more food because you truly believe 0:06:43.480 --> 0:06:46.320 that come Monday or come that next day or after 0:06:46.360 --> 0:06:48.839 the holiday, that you're not going to allow yourself to 0:06:48.880 --> 0:06:51.440 eat that food, And that creates urgency to eat even 0:06:51.480 --> 0:06:55.400 more food, which then fuels that restriction. So binging occurs 0:06:55.520 --> 0:06:58.600 because of the restriction. I see it so often with 0:06:58.640 --> 0:07:01.120 my clients, and you know, thing skiving is coming up, 0:07:01.160 --> 0:07:04.960 and that's one of the most common holidays where people 0:07:05.080 --> 0:07:07.400 will have again I'm gonna use air quotes again, like 0:07:07.600 --> 0:07:11.280 saving your calories for the big Thanksgiving meal, right, and 0:07:11.360 --> 0:07:13.559 thinking like, okay, I'm gonna do it right. I'm gonna 0:07:13.640 --> 0:07:16.000 not eat all day, and then I'll be really air 0:07:16.080 --> 0:07:19.120 quotes good, using so many air quotes on a podcast. 0:07:19.200 --> 0:07:22.840 But that is that diet culture mentality. So being able 0:07:22.920 --> 0:07:25.520 to say, Okay, if I've ever restricted in the past, 0:07:25.760 --> 0:07:28.840 how did that end up for me? Right? Was I binging? 0:07:29.240 --> 0:07:31.440 And I like to normalize that for people of if 0:07:31.480 --> 0:07:34.280 you've restricted and that's led to a binge, which chances 0:07:34.280 --> 0:07:38.200 are it has congratulations. You are a human being and 0:07:38.240 --> 0:07:41.800 your body works correctly, like that's something to celebrate, that's 0:07:41.800 --> 0:07:44.320 not something to feel bad about. And so once we 0:07:44.320 --> 0:07:46.840 can shift that mindset to oh my god, my hunger 0:07:47.080 --> 0:07:49.960 is working correctly, like I binged because my blood sugar 0:07:50.000 --> 0:07:52.400 was low and because I was restricting and because I 0:07:52.440 --> 0:07:55.280 was starving, then we can say, okay, we can remove 0:07:55.680 --> 0:08:00.240 the emotional unpleasantness from that physical unpleasantness that happens when 0:08:00.240 --> 0:08:02.520 we binge, because those are two separate things, and then 0:08:02.520 --> 0:08:04.800 we can say, what can I do differently next time? 0:08:05.040 --> 0:08:07.000 So when we go into let's say, let's go back 0:08:07.000 --> 0:08:11.000 to our Thanksgiving example, can we eat a breakfast, can 0:08:11.040 --> 0:08:14.120 we eat a snack, can we eat lunch? Can we 0:08:14.160 --> 0:08:17.640 eat another snack? And then go into our Thanksgiving dinner 0:08:17.880 --> 0:08:21.280 just as if it was any other meal, and recognizing 0:08:21.320 --> 0:08:25.160 that fueling our body will help keep that urgency to 0:08:25.280 --> 0:08:28.360 eat down because our blood sugars will be stable, we 0:08:28.400 --> 0:08:30.560 will have the food and we won't feel that restriction. 0:08:30.720 --> 0:08:32.439 And the one thing I just want to add, which 0:08:32.520 --> 0:08:35.439 I think you'll agree with, but just how restriction played 0:08:35.440 --> 0:08:37.679 out in my life over the last ten years or 0:08:37.760 --> 0:08:40.439 during my disordered eating, is that it might not be 0:08:40.720 --> 0:08:44.760 total calories. It might be clean eating or only eating 0:08:45.080 --> 0:08:49.160 gluten free for no medical reason or even personal finding reason, 0:08:49.280 --> 0:08:52.720 or dairy or sugar or whatever it is. I remember 0:08:52.760 --> 0:08:55.120 when I saw my therapist for the first time and 0:08:55.160 --> 0:08:58.120 I was explaining my binges and she said, well, are 0:08:58.160 --> 0:09:01.040 you restricting, because restricting cause the binges? And I said, no, 0:09:01.360 --> 0:09:04.320 I'm eating. I'm eating breakfast, lunch, and dinner. And I was, 0:09:04.679 --> 0:09:09.240 but I was excluding so much that it still resulted 0:09:09.320 --> 0:09:12.120 in a binge. So I think just to expand that 0:09:12.320 --> 0:09:15.480 conversation as to you know, what being good looks like, 0:09:15.520 --> 0:09:18.680 maybe it's not just being keto up until Thanksgiving meal, 0:09:19.000 --> 0:09:23.000 really allowing flexibility and examining what restriction looks like on you. 0:09:23.120 --> 0:09:31.280 I love that. You know, when we use the terms 0:09:31.400 --> 0:09:34.320 being good right or being bad with food? A big 0:09:34.320 --> 0:09:37.000 part of intuitive eating, one of the principles is removing 0:09:37.040 --> 0:09:40.400 the morality to food, and I think that's a you know, 0:09:40.520 --> 0:09:43.320 we find so often that our clients have this cognitive dissidence. 0:09:43.360 --> 0:09:46.120 Their logic and their belief systems are not matching up. 0:09:46.200 --> 0:09:50.320 So asking yourself, right now, Okay, if I eat X 0:09:50.520 --> 0:09:53.400 food whatever that food is, right, does that make me 0:09:53.480 --> 0:09:56.040 a bad human being? Does that change my character? Does 0:09:56.040 --> 0:09:59.320 that change my work worth? And most people say no, no, right, 0:09:59.360 --> 0:10:02.000 that doesn't change worth. But then if we say, okay, 0:10:02.200 --> 0:10:05.520 eat that same food, do you feel guilt or shame 0:10:05.880 --> 0:10:08.360 for eating? And if the answer is yes, we know 0:10:08.480 --> 0:10:11.640 that guilt and shame, specifically guilt is rooted in a 0:10:11.720 --> 0:10:14.680 moral emotion. But we just said that we weren't bad 0:10:15.000 --> 0:10:17.160 like that doesn't change our worths. So okay, there's a 0:10:17.240 --> 0:10:20.280 yes over here, there's no over here. That's a cognitive distance. 0:10:20.320 --> 0:10:22.440 We need to dig into that and we need to 0:10:22.480 --> 0:10:25.720 release that morality with food and that will also help 0:10:25.760 --> 0:10:29.640 with that binge restrict cycle as well. Something you said 0:10:29.679 --> 0:10:33.640 about eating breakfast and lunch and a snack and going 0:10:33.720 --> 0:10:37.040 into a holiday meal as if it's any other day, 0:10:37.080 --> 0:10:39.679 I think it's huge. But also what I've loved about 0:10:39.800 --> 0:10:43.440 learning from people like you and Lisa and others that 0:10:43.480 --> 0:10:47.319 I follow is the reminders of, Hey, if you've struggled 0:10:47.440 --> 0:10:50.360 with any type of disordered eating patterns and you woke 0:10:50.480 --> 0:10:54.360 up today and you ate breakfast, high five, Because I 0:10:54.400 --> 0:10:58.800 think so many times I definitely participated in intermittent fasting, 0:10:59.120 --> 0:11:03.120 and so many any times I catch my brain being like, actually, 0:11:03.600 --> 0:11:06.120 should I eat breakfast right now? Because I ate dinner 0:11:06.160 --> 0:11:08.719 at eight o'clock last night and it's not even eight 0:11:08.760 --> 0:11:11.600 am yet and it hasn't been twelve hours. My brain 0:11:11.720 --> 0:11:13.640 still does that to me because it was such a 0:11:13.640 --> 0:11:15.880 pattern for a long time. And then I check in 0:11:15.960 --> 0:11:18.160 with myself and I say, Okay, am I hungry right now? 0:11:18.200 --> 0:11:20.120 Regardless of when I eat dinner? Who cares throw that 0:11:20.120 --> 0:11:22.160 out the window? Am I hungry right now? If I am, 0:11:22.200 --> 0:11:24.280 I eat. If I'm not, I wait a little bit. 0:11:24.360 --> 0:11:27.520 And that's me working through in my own way. Everyone 0:11:27.559 --> 0:11:30.240 has their own journey, their own stories, their own old 0:11:30.280 --> 0:11:32.200 habits that they had that are hard to break. But 0:11:32.320 --> 0:11:36.720 even though I'm haven't intermitten fasted and a very long time, 0:11:37.000 --> 0:11:39.760 well for me, I you know, a year or more, 0:11:40.080 --> 0:11:43.000 I still have those thoughts in my head. We're not 0:11:43.160 --> 0:11:46.240 acting like waking up and eating breakfast and having luncheon 0:11:46.280 --> 0:11:49.480 snacks on Thanksgiving Day is easy, And you will still 0:11:49.520 --> 0:11:52.320 have mental thoughts no matter. I don't know the two 0:11:52.400 --> 0:11:54.319 of you. You've been at this a lot longer than me. 0:11:54.559 --> 0:11:57.120 Do you still have to tell your brain? Oh yeah, 0:11:57.520 --> 0:11:59.840 I don't think that way anymore so for me personally 0:12:00.280 --> 0:12:03.440 at this point. No, But I will say absolutely, it 0:12:03.520 --> 0:12:07.040 takes time. It takes years. Right, So we create neuropathways 0:12:07.040 --> 0:12:09.800 in our brain and these negative thought patterns in these loops, 0:12:10.000 --> 0:12:12.080 which I think Jennifer Rowlands have talked about one of 0:12:12.120 --> 0:12:14.480 your previous episodes, and that is so important to be 0:12:14.480 --> 0:12:16.920 able to recognize that and know that that is not 0:12:17.000 --> 0:12:20.040 a failure. That is just diet culture trying to dig 0:12:20.080 --> 0:12:23.600 its nails right back in right and and present itself. So, 0:12:24.000 --> 0:12:26.880 just like you said, Amy, being able to recognize that, 0:12:27.280 --> 0:12:30.080 whether it's just recognizing it in your head, writing it 0:12:30.120 --> 0:12:33.040 down on paper and then being able to redirect that 0:12:33.120 --> 0:12:36.280 and say, no, I need food to fuel my body. 0:12:36.520 --> 0:12:39.840 I will function better with this meal. I will be 0:12:39.920 --> 0:12:42.679 a better human being with this meal or whatever it is. 0:12:43.160 --> 0:12:46.120 Being able to catch that is so important, and that's 0:12:46.160 --> 0:12:50.200 that's really what the work is. It's it's consistent, consistent work, 0:12:50.200 --> 0:12:52.439 and it's different I think for everybody based on their 0:12:52.440 --> 0:12:55.640 own story of how long that may continue. But I 0:12:55.720 --> 0:12:57.480 have so much hope that you're gonna get to a 0:12:57.520 --> 0:12:59.480 point one day where you're like, I just eat and 0:12:59.520 --> 0:13:01.440 I don't have to think about it. I'll say though that, 0:13:01.559 --> 0:13:04.000 you know, with so much time I spend on social 0:13:04.040 --> 0:13:07.000 media as my job, and I'm exposed to so much, 0:13:07.200 --> 0:13:10.480 once in a while, I'll get something that is not 0:13:10.679 --> 0:13:14.319 me listening to my body. And while I'm not fused 0:13:14.360 --> 0:13:16.760 to it, I'm not like, oh, this person is doing this, 0:13:16.880 --> 0:13:19.280 I should try this. It's a little ding that I'm 0:13:19.320 --> 0:13:22.160 no longer listening to my body because it's rooted in 0:13:22.240 --> 0:13:25.280 fear and we feel fear. So I'd say, once in 0:13:25.280 --> 0:13:27.439 a while, I'll notice something and that's why I call 0:13:27.480 --> 0:13:30.120 it noise, because it's anything that's pulling me out of 0:13:30.160 --> 0:13:33.240 my body, and I'll say, okay, noise, you know, thank 0:13:33.280 --> 0:13:36.440 you for trying to keep me safe, but I'm good here. 0:13:36.600 --> 0:13:38.680 And I think that's kind of two approaches. It's like, 0:13:38.720 --> 0:13:43.439 get angry at diet culture, but get kind to yourself 0:13:43.559 --> 0:13:48.000 for trying to protect you. And it's wrongly perceiving of danger. 0:13:48.240 --> 0:13:50.079 So I feel like that's kind of how it shows 0:13:50.160 --> 0:13:51.880 up for me. Once in a while, i'll flag again, 0:13:51.920 --> 0:13:55.600 I'll ding it. It's very infrequently, but i will notice it, 0:13:55.760 --> 0:13:58.480 and I'll come home and I'm constantly coming home to 0:13:58.920 --> 0:14:01.360 myself and my trust. Than those little moments even where 0:14:01.360 --> 0:14:03.680 I come home, are like little pats on the back 0:14:03.800 --> 0:14:06.319 that bring me even closer to trusting my body, because 0:14:06.320 --> 0:14:08.400 it's like, hey, we just worked together, like we just 0:14:08.440 --> 0:14:11.160 said like you know, see you, no thank you. And 0:14:11.400 --> 0:14:14.319 so I don't think you're if anyone's a failure, if 0:14:14.360 --> 0:14:16.679 they get a moment of oh, well, I just had 0:14:16.679 --> 0:14:19.200 dinner at eight o'clock. You know your example of intermittent fasting, 0:14:19.200 --> 0:14:22.280 it hasn't been that long. I think we're always works 0:14:22.280 --> 0:14:25.400 in progress, and new life changes are going to bring 0:14:25.480 --> 0:14:29.000 up old thoughts or situations, like if Thanksgiving is a 0:14:29.040 --> 0:14:31.000 is a scary one for you that might bring it 0:14:31.040 --> 0:14:34.040 all back, or if you know, we're talking to women 0:14:34.040 --> 0:14:36.600 and people of all life phases, going through big life 0:14:36.680 --> 0:14:39.240 changes means your body is going to change that might 0:14:39.280 --> 0:14:41.800 bring up stuff. So using those tools is really how 0:14:41.880 --> 0:14:44.400 I how I see it. Yeah, I love that. And Sam, 0:14:44.560 --> 0:14:47.840 since we're talking about the holidays to what advice do 0:14:47.880 --> 0:14:51.480 you have for people in situations where they're around family 0:14:51.760 --> 0:14:55.680 that maybe triggering to them. Like I would have been 0:14:55.720 --> 0:14:57.960 someone that showed up at my family dinners and if 0:14:57.960 --> 0:15:00.040 someone was in recovery before me, I would have and 0:15:00.160 --> 0:15:02.640 triggering them left and right. And honestly, I was a 0:15:02.680 --> 0:15:05.200 real buzz kill because I didn't want to eat anything 0:15:05.200 --> 0:15:07.000 that he had. I brought my own food. I was 0:15:07.040 --> 0:15:09.960 real particular. My mom would have her candy dams, but 0:15:10.040 --> 0:15:12.360 I made my candy d ms with Splenda, so I 0:15:12.400 --> 0:15:14.840 was gonna eat my separate thing over here. You know, 0:15:14.960 --> 0:15:17.280 I'm just thinking back on silly stuff that I used 0:15:17.280 --> 0:15:19.040 to do, and I would have been better off eating 0:15:19.040 --> 0:15:22.040 the family meal. But people are really listening to this 0:15:22.120 --> 0:15:24.440 episode and wanting to put in the work for themselves. 0:15:24.480 --> 0:15:27.680 But maybe they show up and there's some stuff surrounding 0:15:27.720 --> 0:15:30.960 them or whatever vibe other family members are bringing into 0:15:30.960 --> 0:15:33.480 the picture, Like do you have any tools that people 0:15:33.520 --> 0:15:35.480 can kind of keep in their back pocket to help 0:15:35.560 --> 0:15:38.880 them navigate the holidays. That's a wonderful question, and I 0:15:38.920 --> 0:15:41.760 think that's something we've already started with all our team 0:15:41.800 --> 0:15:44.200 with our clients, because we know this is coming, right, 0:15:44.240 --> 0:15:47.080 we can anticipate these triggers, and I think there's there's 0:15:47.080 --> 0:15:49.080 different ways that we can do this, but really role 0:15:49.160 --> 0:15:53.160 playing the situation out before it happens, so we can 0:15:53.280 --> 0:15:56.400 recognize it and we can actually walk through that situation 0:15:56.680 --> 0:15:59.280 together with our client, and they can actually start to 0:15:59.280 --> 0:16:02.480 experience some of anxiety or some of the discomfort in 0:16:02.520 --> 0:16:04.800 that setting, which can be really helpful to walk through it. So, 0:16:04.840 --> 0:16:09.680 for example, if Uncle Larry makes a fat phobic comment right, 0:16:10.000 --> 0:16:12.840 being able to say it, like write that down, what's 0:16:12.880 --> 0:16:15.600 like the worst scenario that could happen, and then what 0:16:15.720 --> 0:16:17.760 are the emotions that we feel to that common and 0:16:17.800 --> 0:16:20.360 how do we choose to respond? And I think it 0:16:20.440 --> 0:16:22.440 might change depending on the day, but I think it's 0:16:22.480 --> 0:16:26.720 being able to recognize do I have the mental capacity 0:16:26.760 --> 0:16:31.320 for this conversation? Is Uncle Larry reachable and teachable and 0:16:31.360 --> 0:16:34.040 wanting to hear about diet culture or is it just 0:16:34.160 --> 0:16:36.360 not even worth it to sit and just setting that 0:16:36.400 --> 0:16:40.640 mental boundary to say, I'm not participating in diet culture talk, 0:16:40.840 --> 0:16:44.720 so either change the subject and or leave the room 0:16:45.040 --> 0:16:47.280 and just get out because you know that that's going 0:16:47.320 --> 0:16:49.400 to be better for you. But then I think that 0:16:49.440 --> 0:16:52.400 also comes down to let's say, Aunt Cheryl maybe is 0:16:52.480 --> 0:16:56.000 presenting some signs of disordered eating, maybe some of the 0:16:56.040 --> 0:16:59.000 things you were explaining any of like making the splendid 0:16:59.080 --> 0:17:02.040 gams or or bringing her own food or I think 0:17:02.120 --> 0:17:04.400 now people that have walked through this journey a little 0:17:04.400 --> 0:17:07.760 bit more can have some empathy for those family members 0:17:07.800 --> 0:17:11.800 knowing that they are most likely rooted in disordered eating. 0:17:12.000 --> 0:17:15.360 Because we know that women ages twenty to forty five 0:17:16.640 --> 0:17:20.159 percent of them display disordered eating tendencies and an additional 0:17:20.280 --> 0:17:24.240 ten percent has clinically diagnosed eating disorder. So sevent of 0:17:24.240 --> 0:17:26.879 women are most likely walking around with some form of 0:17:26.920 --> 0:17:29.760 disordered eating, which is insane. And that's not even counting 0:17:29.800 --> 0:17:32.240 the numbers of people that are not, you know, misdiagnosed 0:17:32.280 --> 0:17:35.880 or not diagnosed. So chances are we can recognize that 0:17:36.040 --> 0:17:38.080 and maybe see it through a different lens this year, 0:17:38.119 --> 0:17:40.760 where maybe that would have been triggering before, but now 0:17:40.800 --> 0:17:43.840 we can almost have empathy and again create those boundaries 0:17:43.840 --> 0:17:45.760 where they're needed to be created. Where is it worth 0:17:45.800 --> 0:17:47.560 it to say something to Aunt Cheryl and try to 0:17:47.600 --> 0:17:50.040 open up and and help her, which might be healing 0:17:50.119 --> 0:17:53.200 for you personally, or again, is it better to change 0:17:53.240 --> 0:17:55.800 the subject, get out of the room, and really just 0:17:55.840 --> 0:17:59.600 making sure we're keeping ourself safe, because boundaries are meant 0:17:59.640 --> 0:18:02.399 to keep you safe, not those around you, and that 0:18:02.520 --> 0:18:10.919 is what is most important this holiday season. And just 0:18:11.000 --> 0:18:13.320 to reiterate something that you said that I think is 0:18:13.359 --> 0:18:17.639 really important, especially if you're just starting to unravel diet 0:18:17.640 --> 0:18:20.800 culture and you're really passionate about it, which is what 0:18:20.920 --> 0:18:23.399 happens in the beginning. It sounds like you agree to me, 0:18:23.480 --> 0:18:26.800 but when you said, is Uncle Larry reachable and teachable? 0:18:26.960 --> 0:18:29.880 Like that speaks volumes to me because I think sometimes 0:18:29.920 --> 0:18:32.760 we start the fight to prove how right we are 0:18:32.840 --> 0:18:36.639 with people that are unreachable and unteachable, and it leaves 0:18:36.720 --> 0:18:40.600 us feeling really depleted and alone, especially when it comes 0:18:40.600 --> 0:18:43.360 to the holidays and family. I think that people might 0:18:43.400 --> 0:18:47.480 associate not speaking back Uncle Larry as complicit, but that 0:18:47.600 --> 0:18:50.800 boundary is to protect you kind of like not today Satan. 0:18:51.040 --> 0:18:53.240 You know, get through the day. You have enough on 0:18:53.320 --> 0:18:56.320 your plate dealing with the triggers of the holiday that 0:18:56.400 --> 0:18:59.600 you don't need to also go to war necessarily. So 0:18:59.800 --> 0:19:02.680 of evaluate who you are, what the situation is, who 0:19:02.720 --> 0:19:05.400 your Uncle Larry is, Is there a conversation that's going 0:19:05.440 --> 0:19:07.439 to be healthy for you or not. So I just 0:19:07.440 --> 0:19:09.360 thought that was really important and I wanted to now 0:19:09.400 --> 0:19:12.280 thank you. And I think that's something I've learned personally. 0:19:12.280 --> 0:19:15.120 And Lisa, you can probably attest this, or even you too, Amy, 0:19:15.160 --> 0:19:17.080 even though you're not a dietitian, like you said, when 0:19:17.119 --> 0:19:18.960 you're passionate about this, you want to talk about it, 0:19:19.000 --> 0:19:20.600 you want to shout it from the rooftops, you want 0:19:20.640 --> 0:19:22.760 everyone to know about it. And then there's a bunch 0:19:22.800 --> 0:19:24.520 of we're just gonna keep going with Uncle Larry. If 0:19:24.520 --> 0:19:25.920 there's a bunch of Uncle Larries in the world that 0:19:25.960 --> 0:19:27.360 want to tear you down and tell you why you're 0:19:27.359 --> 0:19:30.359 wrong and quote research, and you can get burnt out 0:19:30.440 --> 0:19:34.040 doing this work very easily. And I've experienced that, and 0:19:34.040 --> 0:19:39.440 that's why I think it's seeking mentors, seeking therapists, seeking dietitians, friends, 0:19:39.600 --> 0:19:42.840 people who are supportive and understand it is not our 0:19:43.000 --> 0:19:46.040 job to change the minds of all the Uncle Larry's 0:19:46.040 --> 0:19:48.719 in the world. If you just focus on you and 0:19:48.800 --> 0:19:51.040 your heart. And I love how you said earlier, Li, 0:19:51.119 --> 0:19:53.879 So like coming home to you, You're going to plant 0:19:53.960 --> 0:19:56.439 seeds and all the people around you that matter, and 0:19:56.480 --> 0:19:59.080