1
00:00:00,320 --> 00:00:06,120
Speaker 1: This is John, this is them, okay, Storytime podcast hosts.

2
00:00:05,680 --> 00:00:06,400
Speaker 2: And we have some.

3
00:00:08,200 --> 00:00:09,840
Speaker 3: Good stories coming up for you.

4
00:00:10,200 --> 00:00:10,640
Speaker 2: That's right.

5
00:00:10,680 --> 00:00:12,239
Speaker 1: But before that, we have a little more sol of

6
00:00:12,240 --> 00:00:14,280
Speaker 1: a two minute ad break from the sponsors keeping the

7
00:00:14,320 --> 00:00:15,360
Speaker 1: show delicious.

8
00:00:16,880 --> 00:00:20,040
Speaker 4: My wife used to enjoy our open marriage until I

9
00:00:20,200 --> 00:00:21,439
Speaker 4: started enjoying it too.

10
00:00:21,760 --> 00:00:22,720
Speaker 5: Nobody wins here.

11
00:00:22,880 --> 00:00:25,160
Speaker 4: My wife, fifty female, and I fifty one male, have

12
00:00:25,320 --> 00:00:27,760
Speaker 4: been together for a little over twenty five years. We

13
00:00:27,800 --> 00:00:30,160
Speaker 4: don't have kids together, but we both have grown children

14
00:00:30,240 --> 00:00:33,519
Speaker 4: from previous relationships. The youngest, her daughter, moved out ten

15
00:00:33,600 --> 00:00:36,159
Speaker 4: years ago. After a period of empty nest syndrome. We

16
00:00:36,200 --> 00:00:39,000
Speaker 4: decided to be more adventurous in our spicy sleep life.

17
00:00:39,040 --> 00:00:42,440
Speaker 4: By the way, this comes from Oops and if you

18
00:00:42,479 --> 00:00:44,280
Speaker 4: want to submit your own story, is gonna be our

19
00:00:44,280 --> 00:00:47,560
Speaker 4: Slasher Cood story Time Separate. This sled about eight years

20
00:00:47,560 --> 00:00:50,440
Speaker 4: ago to us deciding to enter in an open marriage.

21
00:00:50,520 --> 00:00:53,120
Speaker 4: I enjoy hearing about and seeing her with other guys,

22
00:00:53,159 --> 00:00:55,720
Speaker 4: so this worked for me. Despite not being overly interested

23
00:00:55,760 --> 00:00:58,080
Speaker 4: in sleeping with others myself. I've had a few one

24
00:00:58,160 --> 00:01:00,520
Speaker 4: night stands over the years with her knowledge, and that's

25
00:01:00,560 --> 00:01:02,640
Speaker 4: never caused a problem. My wife, on the other hand,

26
00:01:02,720 --> 00:01:05,280
Speaker 4: has had anything from friends with benefits to full on

27
00:01:05,360 --> 00:01:08,000
Speaker 4: boyfriends over the last eight years. Wow, She's even had

28
00:01:08,040 --> 00:01:10,600
Speaker 4: serious feelings for a few people. None of that has

29
00:01:10,680 --> 00:01:13,360
Speaker 4: ever hurt us. If anything, I think we're stronger now

30
00:01:13,480 --> 00:01:15,280
Speaker 4: than we were a decade ago. A year and a

31
00:01:15,280 --> 00:01:17,399
Speaker 4: half ago, I met a woman forty five female in

32
00:01:17,440 --> 00:01:20,640
Speaker 4: line at a grocery store. She was very attractive, recently divorced,

33
00:01:20,640 --> 00:01:23,080
Speaker 4: and seemed interested in me. I decided to pursue it,

34
00:01:23,120 --> 00:01:26,240
Speaker 4: first with drinks, then later with proper dates. My wife

35
00:01:26,280 --> 00:01:28,320
Speaker 4: was aware of what was happening at every stage. She

36
00:01:28,400 --> 00:01:30,720
Speaker 4: thought it was cute and never hinted that it bothered her.

37
00:01:30,880 --> 00:01:33,560
Speaker 4: The other woman, Jane, knows that I'm married and is

38
00:01:33,600 --> 00:01:35,920
Speaker 4: okay with it, though she's held me at arm's length

39
00:01:35,959 --> 00:01:39,360
Speaker 4: for most of our time together. Recently, however, we've gotten

40
00:01:39,600 --> 00:01:43,120
Speaker 4: much closer. A few months ago, we had our first sleepover.

41
00:01:43,319 --> 00:01:45,759
Speaker 4: I went to her place. It wasn't all spicy sleep either.

42
00:01:45,840 --> 00:01:47,680
Speaker 4: We really got to know each other, felt more like

43
00:01:47,720 --> 00:01:50,280
Speaker 4: a real relationship, and since then things have progressed to

44
00:01:50,320 --> 00:01:52,480
Speaker 4: the point that I split my time between my wife

45
00:01:52,480 --> 00:01:55,240
Speaker 4: and Jane fairly equally. My wife has done this many

46
00:01:55,240 --> 00:01:56,680
Speaker 4: times in the past, and it's never been in a

47
00:01:56,680 --> 00:01:58,600
Speaker 4: shoe with either of us. Two weeks ago, we had

48
00:01:58,640 --> 00:02:02,680
Speaker 4: a massive fight about Jane. Apparently she feels very threatened

49
00:02:02,720 --> 00:02:04,800
Speaker 4: by my new relationship with her. She feels that I'm

50
00:02:04,800 --> 00:02:08,240
Speaker 4: replacing her and that nothing she's done is equivalent. Nothing

51
00:02:08,400 --> 00:02:10,840
Speaker 4: was really solved. Everything blew over the next day, but

52
00:02:10,880 --> 00:02:13,160
Speaker 4: it still lingers in the air between us. Every time

53
00:02:13,240 --> 00:02:15,360
Speaker 4: I get a text from Jane, my wife scowls or

54
00:02:15,440 --> 00:02:18,560
Speaker 4: leaves the room abruptly. I don't even bother mentioning her anymore.

55
00:02:18,600 --> 00:02:20,400
Speaker 4: I love my wife and I love my marriage, but

56
00:02:20,520 --> 00:02:22,560
Speaker 4: I care deeply for Jane. I don't want to give

57
00:02:22,600 --> 00:02:24,840
Speaker 4: her up. I feel like my wife is being selfish here.

58
00:02:24,880 --> 00:02:26,480
Speaker 4: I don't have many friends so I can talk to

59
00:02:26,480 --> 00:02:28,840
Speaker 4: you about this, so any advice would be much appreciated.

60
00:02:28,919 --> 00:02:31,359
Speaker 4: There is a quick edit. My wife has had even

61
00:02:31,400 --> 00:02:34,000
Speaker 4: closer relationships with other men over the years. One even

62
00:02:34,080 --> 00:02:36,200
Speaker 4: lived with us for a short while. Oh wow. I

63
00:02:36,360 --> 00:02:38,320
Speaker 4: felt like she was going to leave me, and when

64
00:02:38,400 --> 00:02:41,040
Speaker 4: we discussed those feelings, she understood and reassured me that

65
00:02:41,080 --> 00:02:43,040
Speaker 4: I was her primary. I did the same thing when

66
00:02:43,040 --> 00:02:45,760
Speaker 4: she came to me with her concerns, and suddenly I'm

67
00:02:45,880 --> 00:02:48,760
Speaker 4: cheating and about to ruin our marriage. Nothing either of

68
00:02:48,840 --> 00:02:51,440
Speaker 4: us has done goes against the rules that we established

69
00:02:51,480 --> 00:02:54,640
Speaker 4: and re established frequently. At number two, I'm going to

70
00:02:54,639 --> 00:02:56,760
Speaker 4: talk to her tonight. I won't bring up the fairness

71
00:02:56,800 --> 00:02:58,760
Speaker 4: aspect to this, as many of you pointed out that

72
00:02:58,800 --> 00:03:00,760
Speaker 4: there is no such thing as fair in an argument

73
00:03:00,840 --> 00:03:02,360
Speaker 4: like this. I think I'll try to focus on what

74
00:03:02,400 --> 00:03:04,760
Speaker 4: she feels threatened about. I love my wife and marriage

75
00:03:04,760 --> 00:03:07,320
Speaker 4: and wouldn't choose anyone over her. I'm starting to understand

76
00:03:07,360 --> 00:03:10,240
Speaker 4: that that's probably where her insecurity lies. She needs to

77
00:03:10,280 --> 00:03:12,480
Speaker 4: understand how I feel about her and how my feelings

78
00:03:12,480 --> 00:03:16,280
Speaker 4: for Jane don't affect our marriage. Are some comments, but

79
00:03:16,480 --> 00:03:18,720
Speaker 4: I want to hear your comments. What do you think

80
00:03:18,800 --> 00:03:19,160
Speaker 4: so far?

81
00:03:19,360 --> 00:03:21,840
Speaker 5: Yeah, at that edit kind of helped a little bit

82
00:03:21,960 --> 00:03:24,080
Speaker 5: because he did say I love my wife and I

83
00:03:24,080 --> 00:03:26,400
Speaker 5: love my marriage, but I really care for Jane, like

84
00:03:26,919 --> 00:03:29,880
Speaker 5: you're like they're equal. No, it's always your wife. And

85
00:03:30,000 --> 00:03:31,920
Speaker 5: when it comes to open marriages, it seems like you

86
00:03:31,960 --> 00:03:35,200
Speaker 5: guys were doing really well. But maybe she's just irked

87
00:03:35,320 --> 00:03:38,040
Speaker 5: by this one person because it's like you had passed

88
00:03:38,080 --> 00:03:41,600
Speaker 5: hookups for and you guys seem very you know adamant like,

89
00:03:41,600 --> 00:03:45,120
Speaker 5: this is okay. Communication is clear. Had somebody live in

90
00:03:45,160 --> 00:03:48,400
Speaker 5: your house? Yeah, one of her partners, which is very interesting,

91
00:03:48,440 --> 00:03:50,600
Speaker 5: and he's good like good on you guys that your

92
00:03:50,640 --> 00:03:54,320
Speaker 5: trust is that deep and you guys can mutually agree

93
00:03:54,320 --> 00:03:57,200
Speaker 5: with that. But again the fairness thing, which is like

94
00:03:57,320 --> 00:03:59,200
Speaker 5: when it comes to open marriages, there's such a thing

95
00:03:59,200 --> 00:04:02,000
Speaker 5: as fairness per se. You guys have ground rules. But

96
00:04:02,080 --> 00:04:05,040
Speaker 5: you had to ask her exactly why is she so

97
00:04:05,160 --> 00:04:07,760
Speaker 5: bothered by Jane Again, it seems like you did stay

98
00:04:07,840 --> 00:04:10,720
Speaker 5: fifty to fifty of your time. It should be more so.

99
00:04:11,400 --> 00:04:14,240
Speaker 5: Seventy five twenty five, I don't talk to your wife.

100
00:04:14,280 --> 00:04:16,120
Speaker 5: See what making her not like this?

101
00:04:16,360 --> 00:04:19,640
Speaker 4: Coming Number one says, Okay, based on what you're saying,

102
00:04:19,680 --> 00:04:22,960
Speaker 4: your wife is being completely unreasonable. She's insecure because for

103
00:04:23,000 --> 00:04:24,839
Speaker 4: the first time the boot is on the other foot.

104
00:04:25,240 --> 00:04:27,120
Speaker 4: She never had to deal with this kind of jealousy

105
00:04:27,160 --> 00:04:30,360
Speaker 4: because for her, your open relationship meant that she could

106
00:04:30,400 --> 00:04:32,880
Speaker 4: have boyfriends, but you would only have one night's dance.

107
00:04:33,080 --> 00:04:35,200
Speaker 4: Probably never thought about it too much because she was

108
00:04:35,240 --> 00:04:37,479
Speaker 4: getting hers and people don't think about things when they're

109
00:04:37,480 --> 00:04:40,000
Speaker 4: having fun. But she wanted to have her cake and

110
00:04:40,040 --> 00:04:42,560
Speaker 4: eat it and just assumed that it would always be

111
00:04:42,680 --> 00:04:45,440
Speaker 4: that way because that's what would suit her and it

112
00:04:45,440 --> 00:04:47,320
Speaker 4: was already happening. You don't have to answer this, but

113
00:04:47,400 --> 00:04:49,200
Speaker 4: has it been a while since your wife had an

114
00:04:49,240 --> 00:04:52,640
Speaker 4: extra marital relationship? The way you've described it, it sounds

115
00:04:52,680 --> 00:04:55,679
Speaker 4: like her fun was in this semi recent past, whereas

116
00:04:55,720 --> 00:04:58,560
Speaker 4: you hardly indulged until now. Maybe she's being faced with

117
00:04:58,640 --> 00:05:01,520
Speaker 4: starting to grow older and maybe hitting or approaching menopause,

118
00:05:01,560 --> 00:05:03,760
Speaker 4: whereas you will continue to just be the same for

119
00:05:03,839 --> 00:05:07,000
Speaker 4: the next fifteen or so years at least, or if

120
00:05:07,000 --> 00:05:08,960
Speaker 4: you take care of yourself, and she doesn't like the

121
00:05:09,080 --> 00:05:12,120
Speaker 4: implications that you're able to cultivate this new relationship with

122
00:05:12,200 --> 00:05:14,920
Speaker 4: a younger woman whilst she is starting to feel less

123
00:05:14,960 --> 00:05:18,200
Speaker 4: desirable and less able to cultivate her own new relationships.

124
00:05:18,400 --> 00:05:22,560
Speaker 4: Just a thought, Opie responds, I think you're one hundred

125
00:05:22,560 --> 00:05:24,920
Speaker 4: percent right. She never had to deal with me spending

126
00:05:24,920 --> 00:05:27,719
Speaker 4: the night at someone else's house, or me getting sweet texts,

127
00:05:27,800 --> 00:05:29,960
Speaker 4: or any of those intimate things that seem to drive

128
00:05:30,000 --> 00:05:32,560
Speaker 4: her crazy. Now she's had all that and more for

129
00:05:32,600 --> 00:05:34,320
Speaker 4: eight years, and it was tough at first, but I

130
00:05:34,360 --> 00:05:36,960
Speaker 4: got used to it. She seems adamant that I'm at fault.

131
00:05:37,360 --> 00:05:39,640
Speaker 4: She refuses to get used to it because she sees

132
00:05:39,680 --> 00:05:42,320
Speaker 4: this as me replacing her. She generally has a few

133
00:05:42,320 --> 00:05:45,120
Speaker 4: guys she's seeing at any given time. Sometimes she'll have

134
00:05:45,200 --> 00:05:48,080
Speaker 4: a quote boyfriend who she's closer to or spends plenty

135
00:05:48,080 --> 00:05:50,320
Speaker 4: of time with. Her current boyfriend has been around for

136
00:05:50,320 --> 00:05:52,640
Speaker 4: about a year. Comment number two says it might be

137
00:05:52,760 --> 00:05:56,440
Speaker 4: time to either close up the relationship or end your open.

138
00:05:56,480 --> 00:05:59,520
Speaker 4: Relationship with Jane seems a bit more serious than most

139
00:06:00,120 --> 00:06:02,800
Speaker 4: in relationships I've seen, and your wife seems sorried that

140
00:06:02,880 --> 00:06:05,119
Speaker 4: you might wind up leaving her for Jane. Your wife

141
00:06:05,120 --> 00:06:07,200
Speaker 4: has had her boyfriends, but did she ever give the

142
00:06:07,240 --> 00:06:09,200
Speaker 4: feeling that she might leave you for one of them?

143
00:06:09,240 --> 00:06:11,279
Speaker 4: As I mentioned before, she might be getting a feeling

144
00:06:11,279 --> 00:06:13,719
Speaker 4: that you loved Jane more than her. Opie response. My

145
00:06:13,760 --> 00:06:16,680
Speaker 4: wife has had even closer relationships with other men over

146
00:06:16,680 --> 00:06:19,120
Speaker 4: the years. One even lived with us for a short while.

147
00:06:19,160 --> 00:06:20,599
Speaker 4: I felt like she was going to leave me, and

148
00:06:20,640 --> 00:06:23,880
Speaker 4: we discussed those feelings. She understood and reassured me that

149
00:06:23,920 --> 00:06:26,080
Speaker 4: I was her primary. I did the same thing when

150
00:06:26,120 --> 00:06:28,280
Speaker 4: she came to me with her concerns, and suddenly I'm

151
00:06:28,360 --> 00:06:30,880
Speaker 4: cheating and about to ruin our marriage. Nothing either of

152
00:06:30,920 --> 00:06:33,400
Speaker 4: us has done goes against the rules that we established

153
00:06:33,440 --> 00:06:37,480
Speaker 4: and re established frequently, and there is an update. We

154
00:06:37,560 --> 00:06:40,000
Speaker 4: had a long talk last night. It turns out that

155
00:06:40,040 --> 00:06:42,720
Speaker 4: she was upset by several things, the most serious of

156
00:06:42,760 --> 00:06:45,839
Speaker 4: which was Jane's son. I didn't mention him before because

157
00:06:45,880 --> 00:06:47,600
Speaker 4: I didn't think that he was relevant to the issue,

158
00:06:47,600 --> 00:06:50,320
Speaker 4: but I was really wrong. Seems like she feels that

159
00:06:50,360 --> 00:06:52,359
Speaker 4: I'm too close to Jane and her family, which is

160
00:06:52,360 --> 00:06:54,480
Speaker 4: something that she hasn't done with her partners in the past.

161
00:06:54,520 --> 00:06:56,760
Speaker 4: She's worried that all forged some kind of father's son

162
00:06:56,839 --> 00:06:59,080
Speaker 4: bond with the kid. In reality, I've only met him

163
00:06:59,080 --> 00:07:01,279
Speaker 4: a few times, though I have mentioned him to my wife.

164
00:07:01,320 --> 00:07:03,400
Speaker 4: He's eighteen and spends most of his time at his

165
00:07:03,440 --> 00:07:06,080
Speaker 4: girlfriend's place. He also has his own father who he

166
00:07:06,120 --> 00:07:08,520
Speaker 4: spends time. I told her all of this. It seems

167
00:07:08,520 --> 00:07:10,800
Speaker 4: to settle her a bit, but she was still concerned

168
00:07:10,800 --> 00:07:13,240
Speaker 4: with the time a lot. I mentioned that maybe she

169
00:07:13,320 --> 00:07:15,320
Speaker 4: was freaking out because I never really did anything like

170
00:07:15,320 --> 00:07:17,960
Speaker 4: this before, thought about it and agreed. She was scared

171
00:07:17,960 --> 00:07:20,120
Speaker 4: that I'm looking for something new or just bored. I

172
00:07:20,160 --> 00:07:22,600
Speaker 4: assured her that she's my primary and then I would

173
00:07:22,640 --> 00:07:24,960
Speaker 4: have been happy with things staying the same had Jane

174
00:07:25,040 --> 00:07:27,560
Speaker 4: not come along. That didn't go over too well. But

175
00:07:27,600 --> 00:07:30,200
Speaker 4: I clarify that I meant no one else seemed interesting

176
00:07:30,320 --> 00:07:31,480
Speaker 4: enough to continue seeing.

177
00:07:31,720 --> 00:07:32,000
Speaker 5: Again.

178
00:07:32,200 --> 00:07:34,960
Speaker 4: She didn't lie like that, but she understood what I meant.

179
00:07:35,000 --> 00:07:36,840
Speaker 4: And there is a little bit more into this story.

180
00:07:36,880 --> 00:07:38,920
Speaker 4: But I like that would hurt me too.

181
00:07:38,960 --> 00:07:41,640
Speaker 5: I feel, yeah, now this is now, this is making

182
00:07:41,680 --> 00:07:44,400
Speaker 5: more sense that I feel like Opie was sitting out. Yes,

183
00:07:44,480 --> 00:07:47,040
Speaker 5: you were seeing Jane, but now you Yeah, now it's

184
00:07:47,200 --> 00:07:50,000
Speaker 5: a little bit more sense because there's a biled involved

185
00:07:50,080 --> 00:07:52,600
Speaker 5: or like a treasure involved, right though you met a

186
00:07:52,640 --> 00:07:55,640
Speaker 5: couple of times. The fact that you're like kid Pool

187
00:07:55,840 --> 00:07:58,040
Speaker 5: or try I thought you were seeing Jane not being

188
00:07:58,320 --> 00:08:00,160
Speaker 5: you know, a new father role.

189
00:08:00,320 --> 00:08:02,800
Speaker 4: Right right, and like the fact that she was scared

190
00:08:03,360 --> 00:08:06,600
Speaker 4: of him, like leaving her for someone new, like maybe

191
00:08:06,600 --> 00:08:10,480
Speaker 4: finding someone that he likes more. And then he's like, well,

192
00:08:10,880 --> 00:08:14,000
Speaker 4: I mean I just didn't like anyone until Jane came along.

193
00:08:14,120 --> 00:08:16,320
Speaker 4: It's like, hey, that's not gonna make me feel any

194
00:08:16,600 --> 00:08:18,960
Speaker 4: better liking this girl like I would. That would make

195
00:08:19,000 --> 00:08:20,880
Speaker 4: me more worried that you were like in love with.

196
00:08:20,840 --> 00:08:23,520
Speaker 5: Her another crucial part. So we're getting a little bit

197
00:08:23,560 --> 00:08:28,400
Speaker 5: from Opie's wife's side, which again kind of called it out.

198
00:08:28,800 --> 00:08:31,640
Speaker 5: He was scared because you were giving more time to Jane,

199
00:08:31,680 --> 00:08:35,040
Speaker 5: and obviously you like Jane great, but it's like you're like,

200
00:08:35,160 --> 00:08:38,160
Speaker 5: you really are into Jane rather than your wife.

201
00:08:38,160 --> 00:08:39,920
Speaker 4: But there is a little bit more to the story,

202
00:08:39,960 --> 00:08:42,200
Speaker 4: and let's wrap this on up. He cried a lot,

203
00:08:42,360 --> 00:08:45,439
Speaker 4: so did I. We ended up having spicy sleep halfway through,

204
00:08:45,760 --> 00:08:48,360
Speaker 4: which was a nice comfort. Afterwards, she asked me if

205
00:08:48,400 --> 00:08:50,800
Speaker 4: I loved Jane. I didn't want to lie, so I

206
00:08:50,920 --> 00:08:53,960
Speaker 4: said yes. She cried again. I asked if she had

207
00:08:53,960 --> 00:08:56,319
Speaker 4: ever loved anyone else. I knew the answer. I just

208
00:08:56,400 --> 00:08:58,880
Speaker 4: wanted her to see that she wasn't being totally fair.

209
00:08:59,040 --> 00:09:00,640
Speaker 4: She got my point, but I still said that she

210
00:09:00,720 --> 00:09:03,160
Speaker 4: needed more time to adjust. That was nice to hear,

211
00:09:03,320 --> 00:09:05,520
Speaker 4: because up until then she was saying that she'd never

212
00:09:05,559 --> 00:09:07,040
Speaker 4: get used to it. I asked what I could do

213
00:09:07,080 --> 00:09:09,800
Speaker 4: to use her transition. I also offered couples therapy with

214
00:09:09,840 --> 00:09:13,600
Speaker 4: a spicy, hobby friendly doctor as someone suggested. She likes

215
00:09:13,679 --> 00:09:15,360
Speaker 4: the therapy idea. I think she thought that I was

216
00:09:15,400 --> 00:09:17,520
Speaker 4: ready to divorce her or something, so me wanting to

217
00:09:17,559 --> 00:09:19,520
Speaker 4: work on things brought a smile to her face. We

218
00:09:19,600 --> 00:09:22,640
Speaker 4: ended up deciding to look into therapy, but in the meanwhile,

219
00:09:22,679 --> 00:09:25,120
Speaker 4: I'd continue seeing Jane with her blessing. She doesn't want

220
00:09:25,160 --> 00:09:27,640
Speaker 4: to take a break from our open relationship, but she

221
00:09:27,760 --> 00:09:30,839
Speaker 4: does want way more love affirmations from me. Thank you

222
00:09:30,920 --> 00:09:33,920
Speaker 4: everyone that replied here and sent me pms. I'll try

223
00:09:33,920 --> 00:09:36,480
Speaker 4: to update this again if anything new happens. I don't

224
00:09:36,480 --> 00:09:38,360
Speaker 4: think we're out of the woods yet, but we're a

225
00:09:38,400 --> 00:09:40,640
Speaker 4: lot happier than we were a few days ago. And

226
00:09:40,679 --> 00:09:41,960
Speaker 4: that is the end of that story.

227
00:09:42,080 --> 00:09:44,719
Speaker 5: Obviously, you guys are communicating, and you guys have been

228
00:09:44,720 --> 00:09:47,719
Speaker 5: doing this for a long time. And again it's your

229
00:09:47,720 --> 00:09:51,080
Speaker 5: comfortability level is so much higher than hers, and trust

230
00:09:51,120 --> 00:09:53,240
Speaker 5: in her it's a little bit higher than hers. And

231
00:09:53,280 --> 00:09:55,560
Speaker 5: that makes sense because she's not used to this from

232
00:09:55,679 --> 00:09:57,800
Speaker 5: your side. So and the fact that she's like, Okay,

233
00:09:57,800 --> 00:10:01,000
Speaker 5: we're gonna continue everything. I'll just do a couple of therapy. Great,

234
00:10:01,360 --> 00:10:05,400
Speaker 5: just tread lightly, you know, always double check with her. Communicate.

235
00:10:05,480 --> 00:10:09,000
Speaker 5: This is with open relationships. The biggest factor is communicating

236
00:10:09,040 --> 00:10:13,040
Speaker 5: and making sure you're honest and you are both happy,

237
00:10:13,160 --> 00:10:13,760
Speaker 5: but that is the.

238
00:10:13,840 --> 00:10:15,600
Speaker 4: End of the story. We've got another one coming right up.

239
00:10:16,640 --> 00:10:19,200
Speaker 5: My friend is unhappy with my wife, but I don't

240
00:10:19,200 --> 00:10:20,120
Speaker 5: want to lose them both.

241
00:10:20,320 --> 00:10:21,880
Speaker 4: I can't decide.

242
00:10:22,440 --> 00:10:24,960
Speaker 5: I twenty six male, have been married for about four years.

243
00:10:25,000 --> 00:10:27,240
Speaker 5: Before I met my wife twenty seven female. I was

244
00:10:27,240 --> 00:10:29,719
Speaker 5: actually single for almost seven years. Never had a high

245
00:10:29,720 --> 00:10:31,920
Speaker 5: school sweetheart or really anything like that. I have a

246
00:10:31,960 --> 00:10:33,959
Speaker 5: good amount of female friends, but none that I was

247
00:10:34,320 --> 00:10:37,080
Speaker 5: ever practiced. I thought I was attracted to one, but

248
00:10:37,320 --> 00:10:39,720
Speaker 5: it was more of infatuation, and I decided to cut

249
00:10:39,720 --> 00:10:42,160
Speaker 5: off any chance of a relationship before I deployed one

250
00:10:42,240 --> 00:10:44,400
Speaker 5: year so that I wouldn't end up getting sucked into

251
00:10:44,400 --> 00:10:46,920
Speaker 5: a meetingless relationship. By the way, this comes from user

252
00:10:47,080 --> 00:10:49,319
Speaker 5: bills a Man zero zero and if you want to

253
00:10:49,320 --> 00:10:52,080
Speaker 5: submit your own stories, go to the r slash Okay

254
00:10:52,120 --> 00:10:55,160
Speaker 5: storytime suppered it. My wife actually was never part of

255
00:10:55,160 --> 00:10:57,440
Speaker 5: my friend group, not even from the town I'm currently

256
00:10:57,440 --> 00:10:59,679
Speaker 5: stationed in. I was visiting a city in Texas when

257
00:10:59,720 --> 00:11:01,680
Speaker 5: I first saw her to bar hop with a few

258
00:11:01,720 --> 00:11:03,599
Speaker 5: guys from that city that wanted me to see my

259
00:11:03,640 --> 00:11:05,720
Speaker 5: first rodeo as well. I actually saw her for the

260
00:11:05,760 --> 00:11:07,839
Speaker 5: first time at a video game store. I stopped in

261
00:11:07,920 --> 00:11:09,760
Speaker 5: to look at discount games, and she worked at the

262
00:11:09,800 --> 00:11:12,839
Speaker 5: bookstore next door. He was seriously the most beautiful girl

263
00:11:12,960 --> 00:11:15,840
Speaker 5: I'd ever seen in my life. She was one hundred

264
00:11:15,840 --> 00:11:19,480
Speaker 5: percent unlike any one of me or my friends. I'm

265
00:11:19,520 --> 00:11:22,080
Speaker 5: covered in tattoos and wear trashy holes in my pants

266
00:11:22,360 --> 00:11:24,959
Speaker 5: oversized black shirts. She was in slacks, a buttoned down

267
00:11:25,000 --> 00:11:27,800
Speaker 5: pink shirt with a gold necklace that had her monogrammed

268
00:11:27,800 --> 00:11:30,319
Speaker 5: initials on it, which is relevant because she was the

269
00:11:30,440 --> 00:11:33,280
Speaker 5: last person in the world that anyone expected me to

270
00:11:33,280 --> 00:11:36,040
Speaker 5: totally fall for. I immediately had to talk to her.

271
00:11:36,160 --> 00:11:38,600
Speaker 5: I don't talk to girls I don't know, but I

272
00:11:38,679 --> 00:11:40,760
Speaker 5: had to talk to her. She was beyond intelligent, and

273
00:11:40,800 --> 00:11:42,760
Speaker 5: I found out he had actually gone to school and

274
00:11:42,800 --> 00:11:45,280
Speaker 5: had wealthy parents and worked part time there and had

275
00:11:45,280 --> 00:11:47,640
Speaker 5: a part time internship in the city at a big company.

276
00:11:47,720 --> 00:11:49,760
Speaker 5: It's the rodeo of that trip because the rest of it,

277
00:11:49,960 --> 00:11:52,240
Speaker 5: because of the rest of the time I spent with her.

278
00:11:52,320 --> 00:11:54,800
Speaker 5: I proposed to her after two years of long distance

279
00:11:54,880 --> 00:11:57,240
Speaker 5: dating and meant to leave the military to join her

280
00:11:57,280 --> 00:12:00,200
Speaker 5: in that city. However, I ended up staying in and

281
00:12:00,280 --> 00:12:03,400
Speaker 5: she dropped everything to move in with me, a sacrifice

282
00:12:03,480 --> 00:12:06,440
Speaker 5: I will never forget. I'm a jealous person, and she's

283
00:12:06,480 --> 00:12:09,520
Speaker 5: not a mean or vindictive person. She's sweet and timid.

284
00:12:09,559 --> 00:12:12,040
Speaker 5: A lot of my female friends were instantly enraged when

285
00:12:12,040 --> 00:12:13,720
Speaker 5: I started dating her, and I had to give up

286
00:12:13,760 --> 00:12:16,600
Speaker 5: a few that were constantly demonizing her and putting her

287
00:12:16,679 --> 00:12:18,880
Speaker 5: down an attempt to urge me to break up with her.

288
00:12:18,920 --> 00:12:21,360
Speaker 5: It actually strained our relationship quite a bit because she

289
00:12:21,440 --> 00:12:24,080
Speaker 5: felt really small compared to how many female friends I

290
00:12:24,080 --> 00:12:27,079
Speaker 5: had felt intimidated by how many she was sure had

291
00:12:27,120 --> 00:12:29,319
Speaker 5: feelings for me. Anyways, I kept the friends that were

292
00:12:29,400 --> 00:12:31,760
Speaker 5: nice to her, and she became friends with them as well,

293
00:12:31,800 --> 00:12:34,000
Speaker 5: and loves them and talks to them almost daily. So

294
00:12:34,200 --> 00:12:36,480
Speaker 5: here's kind of the part where it got rocky. I

295
00:12:36,520 --> 00:12:39,120
Speaker 5: should mention my wife is pregnant now, the girl we

296
00:12:39,120 --> 00:12:41,320
Speaker 5: found out last week. He's still beautiful, but she's been

297
00:12:41,360 --> 00:12:43,880
Speaker 5: feeling terrible about her. She hasn't gained weight, but her

298
00:12:44,000 --> 00:12:46,760
Speaker 5: nausea is keep her inside a lot, begetting a lot

299
00:12:46,760 --> 00:12:49,000
Speaker 5: of acne that bothers her. I took her to see

300
00:12:49,000 --> 00:12:51,080
Speaker 5: a friend that was in town, so my female friends

301
00:12:51,400 --> 00:12:54,120
Speaker 5: named Jessica. She actually loves Jessica and talks to her

302
00:12:54,160 --> 00:12:57,280
Speaker 5: often and admires Jessica's tattoos and stuff. They're nothing alike

303
00:12:57,360 --> 00:13:00,160
Speaker 5: but have found common interest and both open minded. I've

304
00:13:00,160 --> 00:13:02,720
Speaker 5: been Jessica's friend since the fifth grade, and I've known

305
00:13:02,760 --> 00:13:04,559
Speaker 5: her family that long too, so I brought my wife

306
00:13:04,600 --> 00:13:06,880
Speaker 5: to meet Jessica in person along with her family. I

307
00:13:06,920 --> 00:13:09,600
Speaker 5: thought it didn't go that bad, but as soon as

308
00:13:09,679 --> 00:13:11,920
Speaker 5: we left that night, my wife was in tears and

309
00:13:12,000 --> 00:13:14,200
Speaker 5: didn't want to go with me to see Jessica again.

310
00:13:14,400 --> 00:13:16,520
Speaker 5: Spent the whole time catching up and eating good food.

311
00:13:16,640 --> 00:13:19,160
Speaker 5: Jessica's dad and I are both and Slash were in

312
00:13:19,200 --> 00:13:21,520
Speaker 5: the military and always get together to drink to talk

313
00:13:21,520 --> 00:13:23,600
Speaker 5: about it and catch up. My wife was mostly helping

314
00:13:23,679 --> 00:13:26,200
Speaker 5: Jessica's mom cook and talk about the new baby, and

315
00:13:26,240 --> 00:13:29,360
Speaker 5: she'd also talked to Jessica. Jessica's brother, Brandon, who's twenty

316
00:13:29,400 --> 00:13:32,000
Speaker 5: and acts like I'm not just twenty year old, was interjecting.

317
00:13:32,040 --> 00:13:33,640
Speaker 5: But I just told my wife not to take him

318
00:13:33,640 --> 00:13:36,080
Speaker 5: seriously because he acts like he knows everything to fit in.

319
00:13:36,160 --> 00:13:38,640
Speaker 5: According to my wife, she thinks Jessica's family is disappointed

320
00:13:38,679 --> 00:13:41,600
Speaker 5: that I married her. He began naming exact instances and

321
00:13:41,640 --> 00:13:43,840
Speaker 5: I started to see it, and now I feel guilty.

322
00:13:43,960 --> 00:13:46,120
Speaker 5: When my wife went to the bathroom, Jessica's mom took

323
00:13:46,120 --> 00:13:49,000
Speaker 5: photos of only me and Jessica. Jessica changed my phone

324
00:13:49,040 --> 00:13:51,880
Speaker 5: background from my ultrasound picture of my daughter two picture

325
00:13:51,920 --> 00:13:54,360
Speaker 5: of me kind of staring into Jessica's eyes. It was

326
00:13:54,360 --> 00:13:57,280
Speaker 5: a weird image that I didn't realize someone caught on camera.

327
00:13:57,360 --> 00:13:59,280
Speaker 5: Her brother kept telling me how hot all the girls

328
00:13:59,320 --> 00:14:01,280
Speaker 5: I went to high school. God told me right in

329
00:14:01,280 --> 00:14:03,319
Speaker 5: front of my wife not to worry that nobody will

330
00:14:03,360 --> 00:14:06,240
Speaker 5: let anyone, meaning my wife, be jealous or keep me

331
00:14:06,280 --> 00:14:08,800
Speaker 5: from agreeing. At one point, my wife jokingly pointed out

332
00:14:08,840 --> 00:14:11,720
Speaker 5: that she was the only one without tattoos. Jessica's dad,

333
00:14:11,960 --> 00:14:15,079
Speaker 5: my longtime friend, neared and said, baby, it's time to

334
00:14:15,120 --> 00:14:17,880
Speaker 5: figure out some individuality and branded keipt talking about how

335
00:14:17,920 --> 00:14:21,880
Speaker 5: stupid monogram clothing and jewelry, something my wife loves and

336
00:14:21,960 --> 00:14:25,320
Speaker 5: wears all the time, looked, and how vapid girls who

337
00:14:25,360 --> 00:14:27,840
Speaker 5: wear it are. Jessica treated my wife's yorky like it

338
00:14:27,880 --> 00:14:30,200
Speaker 5: was the grossest thing in the world, and Jessica's entire

339
00:14:30,240 --> 00:14:33,840
Speaker 5: family mostly talked about how great Jessica and I's friendship

340
00:14:33,960 --> 00:14:36,840
Speaker 5: was since we're kids. Now, I feel like an idiot

341
00:14:36,840 --> 00:14:39,040
Speaker 5: and guilty. I want to say Jessica's friend, but I

342
00:14:39,040 --> 00:14:41,560
Speaker 5: feel like my female friends are dwindling to nothing because

343
00:14:41,600 --> 00:14:43,560
Speaker 5: none of them get along with my wife or really

344
00:14:43,600 --> 00:14:46,480
Speaker 5: care for her or treat her like she exists. In fact,

345
00:14:46,600 --> 00:14:48,920
Speaker 5: none of my friends treat her like she exists. They

346
00:14:48,920 --> 00:14:51,320
Speaker 5: invite me out or me to my hometown, and they

347
00:14:51,320 --> 00:14:55,280
Speaker 5: congratulate me on things like promotions, but no one has

348
00:14:55,280 --> 00:14:58,640
Speaker 5: ever told me congratulations on my child, or my marriage

349
00:14:58,880 --> 00:15:01,560
Speaker 5: or anything my wife. It feels devastated and like she

350
00:15:01,720 --> 00:15:04,440
Speaker 5: cost me my friends in a weird way. I feel

351
00:15:04,520 --> 00:15:06,520
Speaker 5: like marrying her cost me my friends too. I didn't

352
00:15:06,600 --> 00:15:08,720
Speaker 5: change my phone background, and my wife was hurt and

353
00:15:08,800 --> 00:15:11,840
Speaker 5: asked me too, because she found a picture inappropriate. She

354
00:15:11,920 --> 00:15:14,000
Speaker 5: pointed out that I post just pictures of me and

355
00:15:14,040 --> 00:15:16,960
Speaker 5: other girls all over my Facebook and stuff, but nothing

356
00:15:17,040 --> 00:15:19,520
Speaker 5: exists of her on there. I mentioned that nobody ever

357
00:15:19,520 --> 00:15:21,880
Speaker 5: says anything about our photos, so what's the point. She

358
00:15:21,960 --> 00:15:24,440
Speaker 5: got frustrated and has been spending nights at her friend's house.

359
00:15:24,440 --> 00:15:26,520
Speaker 5: He's been gone for two days. I don't know how

360
00:15:26,560 --> 00:15:28,800
Speaker 5: to fix this or what to do. I love my friends.

361
00:15:28,920 --> 00:15:31,120
Speaker 5: I successfully kept all of my high school and middle

362
00:15:31,160 --> 00:15:34,360
Speaker 5: school friends and relationships. My wife is beautiful and she's

363
00:15:34,400 --> 00:15:36,720
Speaker 5: smart and nice, but my friends have been with me

364
00:15:36,840 --> 00:15:38,840
Speaker 5: for life. I feel like a damn idiot for putting

365
00:15:38,880 --> 00:15:40,760
Speaker 5: a hot girl I met in Texas in front of

366
00:15:40,760 --> 00:15:42,760
Speaker 5: my friendship. But I have an obligation to make my

367
00:15:42,800 --> 00:15:46,240
Speaker 5: wife a happy wooman, especially because she's now pregnant. I'm lost,

368
00:15:46,400 --> 00:15:48,200
Speaker 5: and I don't know how to approach her or talk

369
00:15:48,200 --> 00:15:50,200
Speaker 5: about I don't want to lose my friends. I want

370
00:15:50,280 --> 00:15:52,360
Speaker 5: them to be happy for me, but they just aren't.

371
00:15:52,520 --> 00:15:55,160
Speaker 5: In continuing my life with her will one day cost

372
00:15:55,200 --> 00:15:58,200
Speaker 5: me everybody. I don't like that. Yeah, it's I don't

373
00:15:58,280 --> 00:15:58,720
Speaker 5: like it tough.

374
00:15:58,920 --> 00:16:02,040
Speaker 4: It's tough because inside some situations that is a thing,

375
00:16:02,200 --> 00:16:04,240
Speaker 4: like you don't want to give up your friendships just

376
00:16:04,280 --> 00:16:06,520
Speaker 4: for like someone that you started dating or something like that.

377
00:16:06,600 --> 00:16:09,400
Speaker 5: But this is different one Faldr, I am trying to

378
00:16:09,400 --> 00:16:10,720
Speaker 5: get my pregnant wife to divorce me.

379
00:16:10,800 --> 00:16:11,360
Speaker 2: Is it working?

380
00:16:11,440 --> 00:16:13,880
Speaker 5: Jesus man, you married a saint. You don't actually have

381
00:16:13,960 --> 00:16:17,040
Speaker 5: to nail her to the cross. You I meant to wait, wait,

382
00:16:17,120 --> 00:16:19,360
Speaker 5: you don't post pictures of you with your wife because

383
00:16:19,440 --> 00:16:21,920
Speaker 5: you wouldn't get any likes. I gotta tell you she

384
00:16:21,960 --> 00:16:24,840
Speaker 5: deserves more respect than that, and your friend Jessica was

385
00:16:25,080 --> 00:16:28,200
Speaker 5: really disrespectful. Maybe you should stop befriending rude people and

386
00:16:28,200 --> 00:16:31,160
Speaker 5: stop blaming your wife. Oh pee, which was downvoted two

387
00:16:31,280 --> 00:16:33,760
Speaker 5: hundred and sixteen times. Well, a lot of it is

388
00:16:33,800 --> 00:16:35,960
Speaker 5: also because she hates any pictures I take of us.

389
00:16:36,000 --> 00:16:38,480
Speaker 5: But yeah, anytime i'd post something with her, I'd get

390
00:16:38,760 --> 00:16:41,280
Speaker 5: like one or two likes, Then something of myself would

391
00:16:41,280 --> 00:16:43,680
Speaker 5: get over seventy and everyone would tell me how great

392
00:16:43,680 --> 00:16:45,520
Speaker 5: I look. It just didn't feel right, and it felt

393
00:16:45,600 --> 00:16:48,120
Speaker 5: like a big fu to the woman I married. Yeah,

394
00:16:48,240 --> 00:16:50,640
Speaker 5: Jessica was, She's one of my best friends, but that

395
00:16:50,800 --> 00:16:52,560
Speaker 5: just crossed the line. I love my friends, but my

396
00:16:52,600 --> 00:16:54,800
Speaker 5: wife is number one. Tom a number three. Well, do

397
00:16:54,840 --> 00:16:56,960
Speaker 5: you love your wife a lot? Are you willing to

398
00:16:56,960 --> 00:16:59,760
Speaker 5: sacrifice her and your child for a few jealous girls.

399
00:17:00,000 --> 00:17:02,680
Speaker 5: His friends obviously aren't grown up enough, and maybe you

400
00:17:02,760 --> 00:17:04,840
Speaker 5: need more male friends in your life. If having female

401
00:17:04,840 --> 00:17:07,600
Speaker 5: friends are the problem, then befriends their husbands or keep

402
00:17:07,600 --> 00:17:11,120
Speaker 5: on establishing a deeper connection with your current male friends.

403
00:17:11,160 --> 00:17:13,560
Speaker 5: Your wife is going through a pregnancy and feeling mortified

404
00:17:13,720 --> 00:17:16,679
Speaker 5: to take in insults from your friends. He dropped everything

405
00:17:16,720 --> 00:17:19,000
Speaker 5: to be with you. Give her the same back, ope,

406
00:17:19,160 --> 00:17:21,520
Speaker 5: I do. I love her a lot even now, imagining

407
00:17:21,560 --> 00:17:23,760
Speaker 5: life without her sucks. I actually do have a lot

408
00:17:23,760 --> 00:17:26,200
Speaker 5: of male friends too. The male friends from my hometown

409
00:17:26,280 --> 00:17:28,480
Speaker 5: think I married someone stuck up and that she's removing

410
00:17:28,480 --> 00:17:30,600
Speaker 5: me from our dynamic by pressing me to be more

411
00:17:30,800 --> 00:17:33,320
Speaker 5: of a homey, family guy. I actually love spending time

412
00:17:33,320 --> 00:17:35,640
Speaker 5: with her and being that guy. I lost a lot

413
00:17:35,640 --> 00:17:38,400
Speaker 5: of male friends too, who would openly oppose me being

414
00:17:38,400 --> 00:17:40,320
Speaker 5: with her, then turn around and text her and at

415
00:17:40,359 --> 00:17:42,600
Speaker 5: her and ask her if she looks good into bikini. However,

416
00:17:42,760 --> 00:17:45,399
Speaker 5: none of my friends here military are like that, and

417
00:17:45,480 --> 00:17:47,920
Speaker 5: all deeply respect her. He cooks for the single soldiers

418
00:17:48,040 --> 00:17:50,040
Speaker 5: and who watches kiddos so our friends can go on

419
00:17:50,119 --> 00:17:52,280
Speaker 5: dates and be happy. The community loves her, and she

420
00:17:52,400 --> 00:17:55,920
Speaker 5: volunteers off. You're right, I'm humiliating her by letting this happen.

421
00:17:56,000 --> 00:17:57,760
Speaker 5: He dropped her life to be with me. I ower

422
00:17:57,840 --> 00:18:00,480
Speaker 5: happiness and peace of mind coming number four. I'm also

423
00:18:00,520 --> 00:18:04,119
Speaker 5: curious as to what possible reasons, Jessica, her family and most,

424
00:18:04,280 --> 00:18:06,800
Speaker 5: not all, of your friends are so against your wife.

425
00:18:06,800 --> 00:18:08,560
Speaker 5: You haven't really said anything about your wife and her

426
00:18:08,600 --> 00:18:11,280
Speaker 5: attitude that could be the reasons why so many people

427
00:18:11,320 --> 00:18:13,280
Speaker 5: dislike her. So I'm just going to go ahead and

428
00:18:13,359 --> 00:18:15,639
Speaker 5: reach the conclusion that you're so called friends are just

429
00:18:15,720 --> 00:18:18,640
Speaker 5: mean and rude and get off on making someone feel inferior. Seriously,

430
00:18:18,680 --> 00:18:21,080
Speaker 5: has your wife ever given them any reason for them

431
00:18:21,119 --> 00:18:24,199
Speaker 5: to dislike and disapprove of her? No, then stop feeling

432
00:18:24,240 --> 00:18:26,639
Speaker 5: like it's your wife's fault that you've lost a lot

433
00:18:26,720 --> 00:18:29,199
Speaker 5: of friendships. I think it's not about her alienating your

434
00:18:29,200 --> 00:18:30,960
Speaker 5: friends from you, but more like your friends are trying

435
00:18:31,000 --> 00:18:34,320
Speaker 5: their hardest to alienate you from your wife. She's your wife.

436
00:18:34,440 --> 00:18:36,439
Speaker 5: You two are supposed to be partners for life. I

437
00:18:36,480 --> 00:18:38,560
Speaker 5: know I honestly wouldn't want to be friends with people

438
00:18:38,600 --> 00:18:42,000
Speaker 5: who make my significant other feel unwelcome and undeserving of

439
00:18:42,040 --> 00:18:44,679
Speaker 5: me with no good and legitimate reason. Oh Pee, I

440
00:18:44,680 --> 00:18:48,320
Speaker 5: think Jessica's family was making on me ending up with her. Honestly,

441
00:18:48,480 --> 00:18:50,200
Speaker 5: I was a huge flirt in high school and ended

442
00:18:50,240 --> 00:18:52,240
Speaker 5: up never acting on how I be paid. I was

443
00:18:52,280 --> 00:18:54,600
Speaker 5: single forever and everyone was used to that, and then

444
00:18:54,640 --> 00:18:57,040
Speaker 5: I drastically changed when I met this girl. She actually

445
00:18:57,040 --> 00:18:59,439
Speaker 5: doesn't come off as rude or judgey at all. My

446
00:18:59,480 --> 00:19:02,840
Speaker 5: wife about current events and science and volunteers for the community.

447
00:19:02,880 --> 00:19:05,200
Speaker 5: He works at a retirement center and drives veterans to

448
00:19:05,240 --> 00:19:07,320
Speaker 5: the store to get groceries. He's hot and looks like

449
00:19:07,359 --> 00:19:10,080
Speaker 5: she'd have a stuck up personality. But it's so opposite.

450
00:19:10,080 --> 00:19:12,240
Speaker 5: I think my friends are intimidated because this was the

451
00:19:12,320 --> 00:19:14,480
Speaker 5: last person in the world, our enemy, our whole lives

452
00:19:14,520 --> 00:19:16,480
Speaker 5: who made it so inadequate that I would have ended

453
00:19:16,560 --> 00:19:18,159
Speaker 5: up with. Once my wife called out one of my

454
00:19:18,160 --> 00:19:21,119
Speaker 5: female friends for openly lying, was caught off guard because

455
00:19:21,119 --> 00:19:22,760
Speaker 5: she was stern about it. He lied about his ex

456
00:19:22,800 --> 00:19:26,480
Speaker 5: girlfriend cheating on him when the exact opposite happened. Ever since,

457
00:19:26,560 --> 00:19:28,760
Speaker 5: he hated her. But that was about the worst. You

458
00:19:29,040 --> 00:19:31,800
Speaker 5: are right, I'm in this weird us versus her mentality,

459
00:19:31,840 --> 00:19:33,800
Speaker 5: and I think it's my regret for not having better

460
00:19:33,840 --> 00:19:36,720
Speaker 5: friends and warning the loss of them that's getting to

461
00:19:36,760 --> 00:19:38,760
Speaker 5: me right now. That is the end of that story.

462
00:19:38,880 --> 00:19:41,520
Speaker 4: Yeah, well he got there eventually, because that is true.

463
00:19:41,600 --> 00:19:44,240
Speaker 4: I mean ifol like yeah, like again, there are so

464
00:19:44,240 --> 00:19:46,560
Speaker 4: many situations where it is the opposite and the friends

465
00:19:46,560 --> 00:19:49,000
Speaker 4: are like, you know, calling something up that's actually bad,

466
00:19:49,080 --> 00:19:52,080
Speaker 4: and it's like, Okay, don't leave your friends for this

467
00:19:52,200 --> 00:19:54,199
Speaker 4: random person, you know what I mean. But this seems

468
00:19:54,280 --> 00:19:56,639
Speaker 4: like so not that situation. Ope, if you think this

469
00:19:56,760 --> 00:19:59,120
Speaker 4: is the good person, stick by that. And then if

470
00:19:59,200 --> 00:20:02,280
Speaker 4: if these friends are just hating on her for seemingly

471
00:20:02,320 --> 00:20:06,040
Speaker 4: no reason or maybe like superficial reasons, know that you

472
00:20:06,119 --> 00:20:09,240
Speaker 4: are right and stand by her. And it's just showing

473
00:20:09,359 --> 00:20:11,240
Speaker 4: It's not showing that there's a problem with your wife,

474
00:20:11,320 --> 00:20:12,120
Speaker 4: is showing that there's.

475
00:20:11,920 --> 00:20:13,640
Speaker 5: A problem with your friend friends exactly.

476
00:20:13,680 --> 00:20:15,480
Speaker 4: So I'm so glad that you made it there. In

477
00:20:15,520 --> 00:20:20,800
Speaker 4: the end, my supervisor is seducing me, but I'm happily married.

478
00:20:21,119 --> 00:20:22,880
Speaker 5: Uh, get out of here, grossie.

479
00:20:23,119 --> 00:20:26,000
Speaker 4: I've a thirty one male been working my current job

480
00:20:26,040 --> 00:20:27,920
Speaker 4: for about a year and a half now pretty cool,

481
00:20:28,080 --> 00:20:30,680
Speaker 4: pays fairly well, and doesn't usually have long hours. It's

482
00:20:30,680 --> 00:20:32,560
Speaker 4: been great because it provides a good life for me

483
00:20:32,600 --> 00:20:35,200
Speaker 4: and my great wife, so I can't complain by the way.

484
00:20:35,240 --> 00:20:38,680
Speaker 4: This comes from Tom foughtaw and if you want to

485
00:20:38,680 --> 00:20:40,560
Speaker 4: submit your own stories, go to the r slash Okay

486
00:20:40,560 --> 00:20:43,320
Speaker 4: storytime separreddit. In the first year that I've had the job,

487
00:20:43,440 --> 00:20:46,280
Speaker 4: I've mostly had a great working relationship with my supervisor

488
00:20:46,359 --> 00:20:49,960
Speaker 4: early forties and female. Professionally, she's a great supervisor at work.

489
00:20:50,160 --> 00:20:52,439
Speaker 4: She challenges me to learn new things to grow my

490
00:20:52,480 --> 00:20:54,960
Speaker 4: career and always goes to the bat and defends me

491
00:20:55,080 --> 00:20:57,400
Speaker 4: with higher ups. She honestly has made me a better

492
00:20:57,440 --> 00:21:00,800
Speaker 4: person professionally and is wonderful in that regard. Personally, though,

493
00:21:00,880 --> 00:21:03,560
Speaker 4: she's a little bit of a mess. She's a divorce

494
00:21:03,640 --> 00:21:06,080
Speaker 4: woman around ten years or so older than me. She

495
00:21:06,200 --> 00:21:08,880
Speaker 4: has constant drama with her ex husband that I've picked

496
00:21:08,960 --> 00:21:11,199
Speaker 4: up on. She is very good about not bringing it

497
00:21:11,240 --> 00:21:14,240
Speaker 4: into work, but I've overheard some phone conversations and she's

498
00:21:14,280 --> 00:21:16,360
Speaker 4: told me a bit of it at times over lunch

499
00:21:16,440 --> 00:21:19,520
Speaker 4: and stuff. She's also a huge flirt I've never noticed

500
00:21:19,520 --> 00:21:21,560
Speaker 4: it with anyone in the office, but she's used it

501
00:21:21,680 --> 00:21:25,520
Speaker 4: as a quote tool at times at trade shows and

502
00:21:25,520 --> 00:21:28,159
Speaker 4: and such to push details. For example, She's not an

503
00:21:28,240 --> 00:21:32,040
Speaker 4: unattractive woman at all, so she does that fairly successfully.

504
00:21:32,200 --> 00:21:34,800
Speaker 4: Up until about two months or so ago, I always

505
00:21:34,880 --> 00:21:37,200
Speaker 4: just dismissed that as something funny and not something worth

506
00:21:37,240 --> 00:21:39,720
Speaker 4: worrying about. That is, until some of that flirting started

507
00:21:39,760 --> 00:21:42,680
Speaker 4: being directed my way. She had sometimes done this kind

508
00:21:42,680 --> 00:21:45,240
Speaker 4: of innocently as a joke in the past, which was

509
00:21:45,280 --> 00:21:47,960
Speaker 4: easily dismissible, but lately it kind of feels like it's

510
00:21:48,000 --> 00:21:50,560
Speaker 4: crossed the line a bit. She'll knowingly lean over so

511
00:21:50,600 --> 00:21:52,960
Speaker 4: I can look down her shirt, will leave her hands

512
00:21:53,000 --> 00:21:55,760
Speaker 4: on my shoulder a bit too long, and makes slightly

513
00:21:55,960 --> 00:21:58,679
Speaker 4: spicy related jokes stuff like that. I brought it up

514
00:21:58,680 --> 00:22:00,480
Speaker 4: with my wife over Christmas break, and she was a

515
00:22:00,480 --> 00:22:03,280
Speaker 4: bit conflicted. She's met my supervisor before and liked her,

516
00:22:03,359 --> 00:22:05,639
Speaker 4: so on the one hand, she thought that she was

517
00:22:05,720 --> 00:22:07,840
Speaker 4: just being her usual self, kind of like a female

518
00:22:07,920 --> 00:22:10,480
Speaker 4: version of Michael Scott from the office. But on the

519
00:22:10,520 --> 00:22:12,760
Speaker 4: other hand, she does think it's a bit weird, but

520
00:22:12,800 --> 00:22:14,840
Speaker 4: doesn't really know what I should do. She's been my

521
00:22:14,880 --> 00:22:17,080
Speaker 4: lifeline at work so many times and has defended me

522
00:22:17,119 --> 00:22:19,679
Speaker 4: when most others wouldn't. I'd be putting myself into a

523
00:22:19,680 --> 00:22:22,480
Speaker 4: really risky situation politically at work if I tried to

524
00:22:22,480 --> 00:22:25,440
Speaker 4: initiate any conflict or risk my professional relationship with her.

525
00:22:25,520 --> 00:22:27,920
Speaker 4: Now here's the real gick, girl. I have a work

526
00:22:27,960 --> 00:22:29,680
Speaker 4: trip coming up in about a month or so where

527
00:22:29,680 --> 00:22:31,640
Speaker 4: it will be just the two of us. We've done

528
00:22:31,680 --> 00:22:34,040
Speaker 4: this twice in the past, obviously we have two different

529
00:22:34,080 --> 00:22:36,920
Speaker 4: rooms don't travel together, as she just lets me borrow

530
00:22:36,920 --> 00:22:39,399
Speaker 4: her corporate card and make my own travel arrangements as

531
00:22:39,440 --> 00:22:41,040
Speaker 4: long as I get a good deal. But I'll be

532
00:22:41,119 --> 00:22:43,200
Speaker 4: meeting up with her in Vegas for a three night

533
00:22:43,240 --> 00:22:46,200
Speaker 4: trade show thing. I'm concerned that her flirting might escalate

534
00:22:46,240 --> 00:22:48,480
Speaker 4: things in that she'll try to pull something. Well, I

535
00:22:48,520 --> 00:22:50,959
Speaker 4: don't have concrete evidence. I'm fairly certain that she has

536
00:22:51,040 --> 00:22:54,000
Speaker 4: done this or not necessarily with anyone in the office,

537
00:22:54,000 --> 00:22:56,320
Speaker 4: but with other guys in the industry from other businesses.

538
00:22:56,480 --> 00:22:58,679
Speaker 4: I really enjoy working with this lady, and I'm beyond

539
00:22:58,720 --> 00:23:01,240
Speaker 4: appreciative for what she's done with me in my career.

540
00:23:01,320 --> 00:23:04,800
Speaker 4: But I'm also extremely happily married, and I'm concerned that

541
00:23:04,880 --> 00:23:07,720
Speaker 4: she is thinking about trying something on our upcoming Vegas trip.

542
00:23:07,760 --> 00:23:10,719
Speaker 4: Any ideas on what to do? And there is an update.

543
00:23:10,840 --> 00:23:12,920
Speaker 4: I didn't want to make an entirely new update thread

544
00:23:12,960 --> 00:23:15,280
Speaker 4: as nothing major has happened as of yet, but there

545
00:23:15,280 --> 00:23:17,600
Speaker 4: have been a few small developments in the past twenty

546
00:23:17,600 --> 00:23:19,760
Speaker 4: four hours. First, I found out a few more details

547
00:23:19,760 --> 00:23:21,960
Speaker 4: about my trip next weekend. I'll be headed out from

548
00:23:21,960 --> 00:23:25,040
Speaker 4: a nearby airport Wednesday and getting to Vegas that night.

549
00:23:25,160 --> 00:23:27,280
Speaker 4: My supervisor is going to be there already and is

550
00:23:27,320 --> 00:23:29,040
Speaker 4: going to pick me up at the airport since still

551
00:23:29,080 --> 00:23:30,680
Speaker 4: already have a rental car. We have most of the

552
00:23:30,760 --> 00:23:32,480
Speaker 4: day off on Thursday, and she's told me that she

553
00:23:32,520 --> 00:23:34,959
Speaker 4: wants to meet one of our clients Thursday evening for dinner. Well,

554
00:23:35,000 --> 00:23:36,920
Speaker 4: I can't know for sure. I'm fairly certain that there

555
00:23:37,000 --> 00:23:39,480
Speaker 4: is no client really coming to dinner on Thursday. The

556
00:23:39,480 --> 00:23:43,199
Speaker 4: show doesn't really start until Friday afternoon, and only exhibitors

557
00:23:43,240 --> 00:23:46,159
Speaker 4: are going to be there on Thursday, not really attendees.

558
00:23:46,400 --> 00:23:48,520
Speaker 4: I could be blowing it out of proportion, but after

559
00:23:48,600 --> 00:23:51,359
Speaker 4: reading what everyone said here yesterday, my spidy senses are

560
00:23:51,480 --> 00:23:54,680
Speaker 4: kind of tingling. I also noticed two little non verbal

561
00:23:54,720 --> 00:23:56,760
Speaker 4: things yesterday. Came to my office to check on a

562
00:23:56,760 --> 00:23:59,280
Speaker 4: project where that we're working on and kind of sat

563
00:23:59,320 --> 00:24:01,320
Speaker 4: on the edge of my yes leaning over to check

564
00:24:01,359 --> 00:24:03,720
Speaker 4: on something on my computer screen. Without going into detail,

565
00:24:03,840 --> 00:24:05,159
Speaker 4: she did all of this in a way that was

566
00:24:05,160 --> 00:24:09,480
Speaker 4: a little uncomfortably intimate. It's embarrassing and uncomforting because my

567
00:24:09,560 --> 00:24:12,640
Speaker 4: male instinct punted it in and I've found myself having

568
00:24:12,680 --> 00:24:15,399
Speaker 4: thoughts that I hated myself for this is headed an

569
00:24:15,440 --> 00:24:17,639
Speaker 4: in direction that I do not like. I did some

570
00:24:17,800 --> 00:24:20,040
Speaker 4: checking around yesterday and there's no way that I can

571
00:24:20,080 --> 00:24:22,200
Speaker 4: back out of the trip. I've already got meetings scheduled

572
00:24:22,200 --> 00:24:24,679
Speaker 4: with colleagues and clients. Everything's booked in my name and

573
00:24:24,760 --> 00:24:27,200
Speaker 4: is more or less non refundable, especially the high cost

574
00:24:27,320 --> 00:24:30,800
Speaker 4: vendor badge, which is non transferable. I've also talked with

575
00:24:30,840 --> 00:24:32,920
Speaker 4: my wife and tried to see if she can come along,

576
00:24:33,000 --> 00:24:34,879
Speaker 4: but that's not really possible as she has got the

577
00:24:34,880 --> 00:24:37,200
Speaker 4: biggest event of the year and her workplace to tend

578
00:24:37,240 --> 00:24:40,520
Speaker 4: to next Friday and Saturday. So seriously, what do I do?

579
00:24:40,600 --> 00:24:43,440
Speaker 4: And we do have an update. I just got back

580
00:24:43,440 --> 00:24:47,440
Speaker 4: from the trip last night and things went well awkwardly.

581
00:24:47,880 --> 00:24:50,240
Speaker 4: I followed everyone's best advice from the previous thread and

582
00:24:50,280 --> 00:24:53,480
Speaker 4: mostly kept myself and kept things professionable as possible. I

583
00:24:53,520 --> 00:24:55,760
Speaker 4: went ahead and arranged my own travel from the airport

584
00:24:55,760 --> 00:24:59,240
Speaker 4: to my hotel this past Wednesday, and fainted some excuses

585
00:24:59,320 --> 00:25:01,960
Speaker 4: to not do anything with her until Thursday at lunch,

586
00:25:02,040 --> 00:25:04,119
Speaker 4: when we met up to plan stuff for our booth

587
00:25:04,200 --> 00:25:06,440
Speaker 4: at the trade show and get it set up and such.

588
00:25:06,560 --> 00:25:09,800
Speaker 4: We had normal chit chat. Otherwise, she seemed comparably tame

589
00:25:09,880 --> 00:25:11,879
Speaker 4: to how she's acted in the past, and my previous

590
00:25:11,920 --> 00:25:14,720
Speaker 4: fears started to fade away. We got our booths set up,

591
00:25:14,880 --> 00:25:16,840
Speaker 4: kind of went our own separate ways for a few

592
00:25:16,840 --> 00:25:19,120
Speaker 4: hours to do some too received Vegas stuff for a while,

593
00:25:19,240 --> 00:25:21,840
Speaker 4: met some colleagues from another company for dinner, and called

594
00:25:21,880 --> 00:25:23,720
Speaker 4: it a night because we both agreed that we'd want

595
00:25:23,720 --> 00:25:25,760
Speaker 4: good sleep before having to get up early and work

596
00:25:25,800 --> 00:25:28,240
Speaker 4: a long trade show from eight am to five pm

597
00:25:28,280 --> 00:25:31,120
Speaker 4: the next day. The next day, working the show went fine.

598
00:25:31,200 --> 00:25:34,160
Speaker 4: We were actually pretty productive and such. I politely turned

599
00:25:34,200 --> 00:25:36,800
Speaker 4: down adult sodas and such as they were passed around

600
00:25:36,800 --> 00:25:40,920
Speaker 4: the show floor, opting instead for diet spicy flower or whatever.

601
00:25:41,160 --> 00:25:43,800
Speaker 4: The company hosting the show had a nice dinner and

602
00:25:43,840 --> 00:25:46,280
Speaker 4: social hour for us afterwards, and I felt comfortable enough

603
00:25:46,320 --> 00:25:48,320
Speaker 4: to have a mixed drink. I know my limits and

604
00:25:48,400 --> 00:25:51,280
Speaker 4: knew that one wouldn't put me too far. Afterwards, I

605
00:25:51,320 --> 00:25:53,080
Speaker 4: took a half mile walk down the strip to go

606
00:25:53,119 --> 00:25:55,880
Speaker 4: get into a little Vegas trouble and lose a little

607
00:25:55,960 --> 00:25:58,359
Speaker 4: money and had fun and got back to the hotel

608
00:25:58,400 --> 00:26:00,560
Speaker 4: room about nine so I could watch the movie and

609
00:26:00,800 --> 00:26:02,720
Speaker 4: get to sleep early. Again. I felt pretty good about

610
00:26:02,720 --> 00:26:05,080
Speaker 4: the trip. So far, business was good, having a good time,

611
00:26:05,119 --> 00:26:09,679
Speaker 4: and my boss was wellmaved, at least until that point.

612
00:26:09,920 --> 00:26:12,359
Speaker 4: This is where things got Dicey got a call from

613
00:26:12,400 --> 00:26:14,919
Speaker 4: my supervisor about nine thirty saying that she wanted to

614
00:26:14,920 --> 00:26:16,639
Speaker 4: go over some info before we had a meeting with

615
00:26:16,680 --> 00:26:19,240
Speaker 4: the client in the morning. She acted mostly professionally to

616
00:26:19,280 --> 00:26:21,680
Speaker 4: that point, so I didn't worry too much, but asked

617
00:26:21,680 --> 00:26:23,360
Speaker 4: if she wanted to just meet in the lobby bar,

618
00:26:23,640 --> 00:26:25,320
Speaker 4: which she agreed to. We met up for a bit

619
00:26:25,359 --> 00:26:27,520
Speaker 4: and she mentioned that she forgot a folder in her

620
00:26:27,560 --> 00:26:29,520
Speaker 4: room and asked me to come with her because there

621
00:26:29,560 --> 00:26:31,800
Speaker 4: was just one more thing she wanted to check on.

622
00:26:32,040 --> 00:26:34,200
Speaker 5: Why are you acting like you can't say no?

623
00:26:34,680 --> 00:26:34,960
Speaker 4: Yeah?

624
00:26:35,080 --> 00:26:36,679
Speaker 5: Why are you acting like you could just be like

625
00:26:36,760 --> 00:26:37,800
Speaker 5: I'm uncomfortable?

626
00:26:38,119 --> 00:26:41,760
Speaker 4: Yeah, Well, I mean, he's worried about his job being missed.

627
00:26:41,760 --> 00:26:44,200
Speaker 4: But but I feel like in this situation, wait outside

628
00:26:44,240 --> 00:26:46,320
Speaker 4: the door. Wait outside the door, don't get into the room,

629
00:26:46,440 --> 00:26:48,040
Speaker 4: just be like, you know, go grab.

630
00:26:47,760 --> 00:26:50,760
Speaker 5: It, or like I'll walk, I'll walk you to your room, like.

631
00:26:50,920 --> 00:26:52,600
Speaker 4: And we'll go back down, We'll go back down, or

632
00:26:52,680 --> 00:26:54,080
Speaker 4: like I'll wait, I'll hold your seat.

633
00:26:54,160 --> 00:26:57,040
Speaker 5: Oh yeah, I'll order you another drinker exactly like op.

634
00:26:57,080 --> 00:26:59,240
Speaker 5: He's acting like the like you already made excuses like

635
00:26:59,280 --> 00:27:02,520
Speaker 5: I'll get to the airport and I'll avoid her until Thursday.

636
00:27:02,560 --> 00:27:03,960
Speaker 5: It's like what I mean?

637
00:27:03,960 --> 00:27:06,080
Speaker 4: It seems to give him some credit. It seems like

638
00:27:06,080 --> 00:27:08,840
Speaker 4: he's doing some good things to like avoid her and

639
00:27:08,880 --> 00:27:11,040
Speaker 4: like not having too many adult drinks.

640
00:27:11,119 --> 00:27:12,840
Speaker 5: And he gets to like a certain point he's like,

641
00:27:13,040 --> 00:27:14,199
Speaker 5: I don't know what I can do.

642
00:27:14,359 --> 00:27:15,960
Speaker 4: Yeah, there are some things where maybe I.

643
00:27:15,960 --> 00:27:18,080
Speaker 5: Can do something. You have options, right.

644
00:27:18,200 --> 00:27:19,959
Speaker 4: This was kind of a red flag, but she had

645
00:27:20,000 --> 00:27:23,000
Speaker 4: been normal to that point, so I reluctantly agreed. We

646
00:27:23,040 --> 00:27:24,440
Speaker 4: got back to her room and she got me the

647
00:27:24,440 --> 00:27:26,240
Speaker 4: folder that had the client and for that we needed

648
00:27:26,240 --> 00:27:27,960
Speaker 4: to look over. She said that she needed to use

649
00:27:27,960 --> 00:27:30,280
Speaker 4: the bathroom really quick while I looked it over. After

650
00:27:30,320 --> 00:27:33,640
Speaker 4: a moment, she comes back into the room in a bathrobe.

651
00:27:33,720 --> 00:27:36,320
Speaker 4: I knew where this was possibly going, and I immediately

652
00:27:36,400 --> 00:27:38,480
Speaker 4: wanted out. I got up and said I'd better go

653
00:27:38,560 --> 00:27:40,199
Speaker 4: call my wife and get a good night's sleep, but

654
00:27:40,240 --> 00:27:42,520
Speaker 4: she kept asking questions about the client and what I thought.

655
00:27:42,560 --> 00:27:45,280
Speaker 4: I kind of stammered through, looking for an opportunity to leave,

656
00:27:45,320 --> 00:27:47,160
Speaker 4: but she was sort of standing in the way where

657
00:27:47,200 --> 00:27:49,400
Speaker 4: I couldn't just leave. It's all a blur at this point.

658
00:27:49,400 --> 00:27:51,480
Speaker 4: But she dropped her row.

659
00:27:51,800 --> 00:27:54,400
Speaker 5: Oh she she did that thing. I looked away immediately,

660
00:27:54,520 --> 00:27:54,800
Speaker 5: but she.

661
00:27:54,840 --> 00:27:57,760
Speaker 4: Was standing there in lace panties and nothing else. I

662
00:27:57,800 --> 00:27:59,880
Speaker 4: did not want to be attracted to her and give

663
00:28:00,040 --> 00:28:02,399
Speaker 4: into any primal mail notion, so I just kind of

664
00:28:02,400 --> 00:28:04,600
Speaker 4: averted my eyes and slipped out the door and said

665
00:28:04,600 --> 00:28:06,159
Speaker 4: I would see her in the morning. I called my

666
00:28:06,200 --> 00:28:08,480
Speaker 4: wife and told her what happened. She was just kind

667
00:28:08,520 --> 00:28:11,040
Speaker 4: of dumb struck and didn't really know what to tell me,

668
00:28:11,200 --> 00:28:13,840
Speaker 4: felt so confused. Part of me was offended that she'd

669
00:28:13,840 --> 00:28:15,720
Speaker 4: go that far. Part of me was scared to death

670
00:28:15,720 --> 00:28:18,840
Speaker 4: over what would happen next, and I'll be embarrassingly honest

671
00:28:18,880 --> 00:28:20,840
Speaker 4: that primal mail part of me was a little excited

672
00:28:20,840 --> 00:28:23,439
Speaker 4: that something actually happened. I even told my wife about it,

673
00:28:23,480 --> 00:28:26,600
Speaker 4: and with her encouragement and a few fun Snapchat pictures

674
00:28:26,720 --> 00:28:29,240
Speaker 4: she sent me, I visited certain sites on the internet

675
00:28:29,320 --> 00:28:31,440
Speaker 4: and got that out of my sister. The next morning,

676
00:28:31,520 --> 00:28:33,920
Speaker 4: it was as if nothing happened. I was probably acting

677
00:28:34,000 --> 00:28:36,760
Speaker 4: very awkwardly the next two days and tiptoeing around her,

678
00:28:36,800 --> 00:28:38,920
Speaker 4: but she acted as if nothing happened. It was cheaper

679
00:28:38,960 --> 00:28:40,640
Speaker 4: for the company to stay in another night and fly out

680
00:28:40,680 --> 00:28:43,320
Speaker 4: Monday afternoon, and I just totally kept my distance between

681
00:28:43,360 --> 00:28:45,960
Speaker 4: the end of the show Sunday afternoon and when I left.

682
00:28:46,040 --> 00:28:47,800
Speaker 4: It's the first day back in the office today, but

683
00:28:47,920 --> 00:28:50,400
Speaker 4: she took an off day today and won't be back

684
00:28:50,440 --> 00:28:52,680
Speaker 4: in until tomorrow. I have no idea what to do.

685
00:28:52,960 --> 00:28:55,120
Speaker 4: It's possible that she'll just never talk about it again,

686
00:28:55,160 --> 00:28:57,480
Speaker 4: but so are many other possibilities. If I try to

687
00:28:57,480 --> 00:28:59,520
Speaker 4: bring it up with anyone here at the office, it'll

688
00:28:59,560 --> 00:29:02,080
Speaker 4: just be word against hers. I just have no clue

689
00:29:02,160 --> 00:29:04,400
Speaker 4: how to proceed here. I've already been looking elsewhere for

690
00:29:04,440 --> 00:29:06,640
Speaker 4: other jobs for around two months now and haven't had

691
00:29:06,720 --> 00:29:08,520
Speaker 4: much luck. So I don't know if I can just leave.

692
00:29:08,600 --> 00:29:11,120
Speaker 4: It's just so dang confusing. Now is the end of

693
00:29:11,160 --> 00:29:12,160
Speaker 4: that story, But we.

694
00:29:12,200 --> 00:29:13,520
Speaker 5: Just leave the elephant in the room.

695
00:29:13,840 --> 00:29:16,040
Speaker 4: Well, I think, yeah, I think she's not going to

696
00:29:16,080 --> 00:29:17,520
Speaker 4: bring it up. She's not going to bring it up.

697
00:29:17,680 --> 00:29:21,000
Speaker 4: She's clearly rejected. This is up to you op to

698
00:29:21,120 --> 00:29:24,280
Speaker 4: be just be like, hey, talk for a second, be

699
00:29:24,360 --> 00:29:27,840
Speaker 4: like I have noticed like flirtatious things in the past.

700
00:29:28,240 --> 00:29:30,040
Speaker 4: Didn't want to say anything because they wasn't so sure.

701
00:29:30,400 --> 00:29:33,160
Speaker 4: But when you just took off your clothes in front

702
00:29:33,200 --> 00:29:35,880
Speaker 4: of me, that was absolutely not okay. And that's that.

703
00:29:36,240 --> 00:29:37,760
Speaker 4: It made it so much clear that you have been

704
00:29:37,840 --> 00:29:40,120
Speaker 4: doing this stuff. I don't want to report you to HR.

705
00:29:40,280 --> 00:29:42,040
Speaker 4: Tell her that, but like, you can definitely do that.

706
00:29:42,120 --> 00:29:44,160
Speaker 5: I threaten me, how far are you?

707
00:29:44,280 --> 00:29:44,480
Speaker 2: Yeah?

708
00:29:44,520 --> 00:29:48,360
Speaker 4: Exactly, like so stupid, but yeah, and maybe record this conversation, yeah,

709
00:29:48,440 --> 00:29:50,200
Speaker 4: just in case. But yeah, I don't want to like

710
00:29:50,240 --> 00:29:53,080
Speaker 4: report you to HR because I appreciate the things you've

711
00:29:53,080 --> 00:29:56,000
Speaker 4: done for me and I appreciate our professional time together. However,

712
00:29:56,080 --> 00:29:58,600
Speaker 4: it needs to stay professional, and you did not do that.

713
00:29:58,720 --> 00:30:00,560
Speaker 4: I have a wife I'm not in interested in you

714
00:30:00,600 --> 00:30:02,840
Speaker 4: like that. Yeah, you have to be started laid down

715
00:30:02,840 --> 00:30:05,040
Speaker 4: the law because she is. She's not going to start

716
00:30:05,040 --> 00:30:05,600
Speaker 4: that conversation.

717
00:30:05,680 --> 00:30:07,320
Speaker 5: No, not at all, because it's a thing of power

718
00:30:07,360 --> 00:30:09,240
Speaker 5: as well. Yeah, like, oh, hen can I had to

719
00:30:09,240 --> 00:30:10,320
Speaker 5: bring it up, the elephant in the room.

720
00:30:10,520 --> 00:30:11,760
Speaker 4: He's not going to do anything about it.

721
00:30:11,840 --> 00:30:14,040
Speaker 5: Yeah, might just keep going. I would say, keep looking

722
00:30:14,080 --> 00:30:14,520
Speaker 5: for a job.

723
00:30:14,600 --> 00:30:15,640
Speaker 4: That is the end of that story.

724
00:30:16,760 --> 00:30:18,840
Speaker 3: Hey, it's Sam, your og host. Here we get back

725
00:30:18,840 --> 00:30:20,959
Speaker 3: to the stories. But here's three minutes bads from our sponsor.

726
00:30:21,560 --> 00:30:24,680
Speaker 1: My boyfriend refused to get me a Christmas gift, even

727
00:30:24,760 --> 00:30:29,040
Speaker 1: though I already bottom one. Oh man, that's bad boyfriends.

728
00:30:29,120 --> 00:30:31,680
Speaker 1: I twenty one female. I've been dating Rob, twenty three male,

729
00:30:31,840 --> 00:30:33,840
Speaker 1: since February, and I thought things were going really well

730
00:30:33,920 --> 00:30:36,240
Speaker 1: until today. I know it's already ridiculously late to speak

731
00:30:36,240 --> 00:30:39,200
Speaker 1: about presence, and I wish we'd discussed this earlier. I

732
00:30:39,320 --> 00:30:41,800
Speaker 1: just assumed even if we hadn't spoken about giving presents,

733
00:30:41,800 --> 00:30:44,880
Speaker 1: we would still be exchanging some. Well, today I brought

734
00:30:44,960 --> 00:30:46,520
Speaker 1: up that I couldn't wait for Christmas and I was

735
00:30:46,560 --> 00:30:48,400
Speaker 1: wondering what my parents were going to get me, and

736
00:30:48,440 --> 00:30:51,160
Speaker 1: he started going off about how he's so against presence

737
00:30:51,200 --> 00:30:54,120
Speaker 1: and the idea of gifts are.

738
00:30:54,160 --> 00:30:58,720
Speaker 3: Lame, lame. Yeah, only nerds want presents.

739
00:30:58,120 --> 00:31:01,560
Speaker 1: Right, But by the way, hey, this comes from what

740
00:31:01,800 --> 00:31:04,200
Speaker 1: to do now And if you want to submit your

741
00:31:04,200 --> 00:31:07,120
Speaker 1: own stories, go to the r slash Okay storytime subreddits

742
00:31:07,280 --> 00:31:09,480
Speaker 1: Boys of year olds. So I was taking it back

743
00:31:10,040 --> 00:31:13,520
Speaker 1: and asked, so you're not giving me anything and he

744
00:31:13,600 --> 00:31:18,040
Speaker 1: said nah. He told me he's never bought anything for anyone,

745
00:31:18,200 --> 00:31:20,040
Speaker 1: so I shouldn't expect to be different.

746
00:31:20,760 --> 00:31:22,800
Speaker 3: Sounds like a solid earth kind of man.

747
00:31:22,920 --> 00:31:24,960
Speaker 2: He's laying it down, like I.

748
00:31:24,920 --> 00:31:27,920
Speaker 1: Mean, at least he's consistent. He's he's telling the truth.

749
00:31:27,960 --> 00:31:30,440
Speaker 1: I guess we spoke for a long while about why

750
00:31:30,520 --> 00:31:33,080
Speaker 1: and such, but it's not important as in the end,

751
00:31:33,160 --> 00:31:35,600
Speaker 1: he still isn't going to give me anything.

752
00:31:35,920 --> 00:31:38,360
Speaker 3: I mean, I think I think we should know why.

753
00:31:39,400 --> 00:31:39,760
Speaker 2: Hmmm.

754
00:31:40,200 --> 00:31:43,280
Speaker 3: I feel like that would help you understand. Like maybe

755
00:31:43,320 --> 00:31:46,360
Speaker 3: he's like if if his why is like I don't

756
00:31:46,360 --> 00:31:51,440
Speaker 3: believe in earthly possessions, and I feel a lot the

757
00:31:51,520 --> 00:31:56,240
Speaker 3: material things influenced my happiness negatively, like that's kind of

758
00:31:56,320 --> 00:31:59,440
Speaker 3: like a goaded an. So I'm like, oh, okay, maybe

759
00:31:59,480 --> 00:32:02,200
Speaker 3: that's it, you know, but there's another one.

760
00:32:02,440 --> 00:32:02,760
Speaker 2: Maybe not.

761
00:32:02,840 --> 00:32:08,040
Speaker 1: If he's like I don't like spending fifteen dollars on you, yeah.

762
00:32:07,920 --> 00:32:10,400
Speaker 3: But he'll spend fifteen dollars on like a macho latte,

763
00:32:10,480 --> 00:32:14,360
Speaker 3: It's like, well, I see what your priorities are. You know,

764
00:32:14,400 --> 00:32:18,440
Speaker 3: you're you're trying to trying to boo up this fake

765
00:32:18,680 --> 00:32:24,560
Speaker 3: coffee instead of bowing up with me. Awesome, thank you.

766
00:32:27,000 --> 00:32:28,400
Speaker 2: I feel personally attacked.

767
00:32:29,840 --> 00:32:34,920
Speaker 1: I got a mucha this morning, so I feel as

768
00:32:35,000 --> 00:32:37,600
Speaker 1: if things have changed since his conversation in only a

769
00:32:37,640 --> 00:32:40,400
Speaker 1: few hours. I feel as if I'm obviously not too

770
00:32:40,400 --> 00:32:42,239
Speaker 1: important to him if he hasn't gone out of his

771
00:32:42,280 --> 00:32:45,080
Speaker 1: way to give me even a tiny gift. I made

772
00:32:45,080 --> 00:32:47,480
Speaker 1: it clear I do like giving and receiving presents, and

773
00:32:47,520 --> 00:32:49,880
Speaker 1: I told him I'd already bought his, so he said

774
00:32:49,920 --> 00:32:51,719
Speaker 1: that he would just take his then take his present.

775
00:32:52,200 --> 00:32:54,040
Speaker 1: Is it wrong of me to not want to give

776
00:32:54,120 --> 00:32:56,720
Speaker 1: him his present if I won't be receiving one. I

777
00:32:56,720 --> 00:32:58,800
Speaker 1: think it's a little selfish that he's going to accept

778
00:32:58,800 --> 00:33:03,400
Speaker 1: his present without giving me anything just super quick. I

779
00:33:03,400 --> 00:33:08,120
Speaker 1: think it's about the emotions being met, Yeah, more something

780
00:33:08,120 --> 00:33:08,600
Speaker 1: in the presence.

781
00:33:09,000 --> 00:33:11,000
Speaker 2: Yeah. What it sounds like.

782
00:33:12,760 --> 00:33:15,560
Speaker 3: Is op he is more invested in the relationship than

783
00:33:16,040 --> 00:33:20,160
Speaker 3: her boyfriend, and she's feeling through the through the pro

784
00:33:20,360 --> 00:33:21,040
Speaker 3: present thing.

785
00:33:21,480 --> 00:33:26,239
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, he's not engaged. He is not responding to

786
00:33:26,920 --> 00:33:29,080
Speaker 2: a once or a thing.

787
00:33:28,960 --> 00:33:33,320
Speaker 3: That now, and he's not mirroring her energy. Indeed, I

788
00:33:33,360 --> 00:33:36,160
Speaker 3: feel like as soon as you stop mirroring someone's energy

789
00:33:37,000 --> 00:33:41,080
Speaker 3: and started treating like the relationship is can be can

790
00:33:41,160 --> 00:33:43,280
Speaker 3: be can be hurt. At least it's not going to

791
00:33:43,320 --> 00:33:44,160
Speaker 3: grow in more depth.

792
00:33:44,840 --> 00:33:46,720
Speaker 2: Very true, But I.

793
00:33:46,640 --> 00:33:49,080
Speaker 1: Don't want to break up, but I am wondering how

794
00:33:49,080 --> 00:33:52,800
Speaker 1: important this relationship is to him. This may sound melodramatic,

795
00:33:52,920 --> 00:33:55,600
Speaker 1: but I've never been with someone with such odd views

796
00:33:55,600 --> 00:33:56,280
Speaker 1: on Christmas.

797
00:33:56,520 --> 00:33:58,560
Speaker 2: What do you guys think? Should I take his present back?

798
00:33:58,560 --> 00:34:00,760
Speaker 1: Should I give it to him and ask if you'll

799
00:34:00,760 --> 00:34:03,200
Speaker 1: make an exception and buy me at least a little something?

800
00:34:03,640 --> 00:34:06,720
Speaker 1: Or should I keep the presence for myself? Also it

801
00:34:06,800 --> 00:34:09,520
Speaker 1: things were to go downhill? Is this a ridiculous reason

802
00:34:09,520 --> 00:34:12,400
Speaker 1: to break up? Have you ever met someone with similar opinions?

803
00:34:12,440 --> 00:34:15,880
Speaker 1: And thanks in advance, ladies and gentlemen.

804
00:34:15,880 --> 00:34:16,880
Speaker 3: How has been together?

805
00:34:17,520 --> 00:34:21,839
Speaker 2: Uh, that's a good question. We know they're twenty one

806
00:34:21,880 --> 00:34:22,560
Speaker 2: and twenty three.

807
00:34:23,440 --> 00:34:26,160
Speaker 1: Uh, they've been dating since February, so I think it's

808
00:34:26,640 --> 00:34:29,360
Speaker 1: months and not a year.

809
00:34:29,640 --> 00:34:29,960
Speaker 2: Bluss.

810
00:34:30,960 --> 00:34:35,319
Speaker 3: I think I would. I think I would. Uh, I mean,

811
00:34:35,320 --> 00:34:41,399
Speaker 3: I think I would talk about it first, obviously, But yeah,

812
00:34:41,400 --> 00:34:43,520
Speaker 3: I just I feel like there's a mismatch and it

813
00:34:43,520 --> 00:34:46,920
Speaker 3: deserves a conversation. And this is probably like the present

814
00:34:46,960 --> 00:34:49,279
Speaker 3: thing is an embodiment of like a larger issue within

815
00:34:49,280 --> 00:34:52,879
Speaker 3: the relationship, with feeling that there's mismatched energy being put in.

816
00:34:54,040 --> 00:34:57,120
Speaker 2: I agree, Yeah, you gotta gotta listen, gotta listen to

817
00:34:57,160 --> 00:35:00,719
Speaker 2: your to your partner. See you know, listen shut it down.

818
00:35:01,120 --> 00:35:03,920
Speaker 2: That shut it down, Ladies and gentlemen, you can. But

819
00:35:04,040 --> 00:35:05,839
Speaker 2: we have an update.

820
00:35:07,560 --> 00:35:07,799
Speaker 3: Hello.

821
00:35:08,880 --> 00:35:11,000
Speaker 1: Lots of crap has happened since I wrote this post,

822
00:35:11,040 --> 00:35:13,840
Speaker 1: and it's been pretty hectic. I decided to keep the

823
00:35:13,880 --> 00:35:16,200
Speaker 1: gift I got him. It was two games for the

824
00:35:16,239 --> 00:35:19,520
Speaker 1: PS four, and because I like gaming and I don't

825
00:35:19,520 --> 00:35:22,200
Speaker 1: have those games, I figured i'd keep them for myself.

826
00:35:23,080 --> 00:35:24,080
Speaker 2: I knew taking them.

827
00:35:24,000 --> 00:35:26,680
Speaker 1: Back would be pointless because I'd end up buying something

828
00:35:26,719 --> 00:35:29,800
Speaker 1: similar anyways, So I opened them as I was feeling

829
00:35:29,840 --> 00:35:33,360
Speaker 1: way too stressed about this, and played them happily. It

830
00:35:33,400 --> 00:35:35,720
Speaker 1: did cheer me up for a bit, so did calling

831
00:35:35,760 --> 00:35:39,200
Speaker 1: a few friends. So I decided to speak to him.

832
00:35:39,520 --> 00:35:41,279
Speaker 1: I went over to his house and I asked him

833
00:35:41,320 --> 00:35:44,360
Speaker 1: if this meant I'd not be getting presents for my

834
00:35:44,440 --> 00:35:48,920
Speaker 1: Birthday or Valentine's Day either, and he said those holidays

835
00:35:49,080 --> 00:35:49,720
Speaker 1: were different.

836
00:35:50,840 --> 00:35:53,120
Speaker 3: Wait, Valentine's Day is different than Christmas.

837
00:35:53,200 --> 00:35:56,120
Speaker 1: He says that Birthday and Valentine's Day are different, and

838
00:35:56,120 --> 00:35:57,360
Speaker 1: then Christmas.

839
00:35:57,760 --> 00:36:00,480
Speaker 2: I wonder if he has like a traumatic Christmas story.

840
00:36:01,040 --> 00:36:01,920
Speaker 2: Christmas is so.

841
00:36:01,960 --> 00:36:05,719
Speaker 3: Much more a gift giving thing than Valentine's Day, Valentine's Day,

842
00:36:05,840 --> 00:36:08,279
Speaker 3: you can. I mean, I feel like you could get

843
00:36:08,280 --> 00:36:11,000
Speaker 3: away with like a smooch and a flower, but like

844
00:36:11,440 --> 00:36:14,200
Speaker 3: you can't give a smooch and a flower on Christmas.

845
00:36:14,200 --> 00:36:17,080
Speaker 3: Like you gotta get like a lego set of like

846
00:36:17,160 --> 00:36:17,840
Speaker 3: gotta be something.

847
00:36:19,280 --> 00:36:22,840
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's so true, man, there, it is so true.

848
00:36:23,320 --> 00:36:23,560
Speaker 2: True.

849
00:36:24,560 --> 00:36:27,400
Speaker 1: So he said those holidays were different. Then apparently the

850
00:36:27,440 --> 00:36:30,520
Speaker 1: only holiday he was against giving gifts on.

851
00:36:31,160 --> 00:36:35,160
Speaker 2: Is christmasbe he's Jewish, it could be. But this confused

852
00:36:35,160 --> 00:36:35,719
Speaker 2: me even more.

853
00:36:36,120 --> 00:36:39,280
Speaker 1: Okay, ladies and gentlemen, As if he's against present giving,

854
00:36:39,520 --> 00:36:42,200
Speaker 1: shouldn't it be for all holidays and not just one.

855
00:36:42,760 --> 00:36:45,240
Speaker 1: I asked him if it had to do with religious reasons,

856
00:36:45,360 --> 00:36:48,279
Speaker 1: and he said, no, good question. He just disliked the

857
00:36:48,280 --> 00:36:50,920
Speaker 1: idea of Christmas and that was it. He doesn't stand

858
00:36:50,920 --> 00:36:51,400
Speaker 1: for Christmas.

859
00:36:51,400 --> 00:36:54,560
Speaker 2: Okay? He this the guy really is the Grinch.

860
00:36:55,680 --> 00:36:58,200
Speaker 1: He has been brought up thinking that it wasn't normal

861
00:36:58,239 --> 00:37:00,600
Speaker 1: to give presents on Christmas. And then I brought up

862
00:37:00,600 --> 00:37:02,920
Speaker 1: another point that was mentioned a few times in the comments.

863
00:37:03,200 --> 00:37:05,320
Speaker 1: How come I wasn't an exception?

864
00:37:05,880 --> 00:37:09,160
Speaker 3: Right? I'm special, I'm cool, he's special.

865
00:37:09,840 --> 00:37:12,120
Speaker 1: I should be a little bit more important to him,

866
00:37:12,160 --> 00:37:15,480
Speaker 1: I hope, and therefore he could have bought me something anyways,

867
00:37:15,600 --> 00:37:17,359
Speaker 1: just because I'm his girlfriend and it would have been

868
00:37:17,400 --> 00:37:20,359
Speaker 1: nice to receive something. He told me he'd never make

869
00:37:20,400 --> 00:37:24,560
Speaker 1: an exception for anyone because those were his beliefs and

870
00:37:24,640 --> 00:37:27,920
Speaker 1: anyone who dated him would need to understand and respect

871
00:37:27,960 --> 00:37:34,080
Speaker 1: that man it hates Christmas dude. Yes, yes, Riley, this

872
00:37:34,239 --> 00:37:37,000
Speaker 1: is that guy. This is that guy, but having way

873
00:37:37,080 --> 00:37:41,120
Speaker 1: less fun. He's swimming in all thirty of his dollars

874
00:37:41,160 --> 00:37:45,880
Speaker 1: he saved on the bath and body Works gift he

875
00:37:45,920 --> 00:37:46,600
Speaker 1: would have gotten her.

876
00:37:46,680 --> 00:37:49,839
Speaker 3: Also, I'd just like to say that Scrooge would break

877
00:37:49,880 --> 00:37:51,680
Speaker 3: every bone in his body if he was trying to

878
00:37:51,680 --> 00:37:52,560
Speaker 3: dive into his money.

879
00:37:52,840 --> 00:37:55,520
Speaker 2: That's actually a very good point.

880
00:37:56,120 --> 00:37:59,879
Speaker 3: Wow, dude, don't believe everything you see on TV.

881
00:38:01,120 --> 00:38:02,000
Speaker 2: So I guess what happened?

882
00:38:02,040 --> 00:38:02,320
Speaker 3: Guys?

883
00:38:02,680 --> 00:38:05,920
Speaker 2: What we argued for a long time?

884
00:38:06,160 --> 00:38:06,680
Speaker 3: How long?

885
00:38:07,520 --> 00:38:08,359
Speaker 2: A long time?

886
00:38:08,480 --> 00:38:11,120
Speaker 3: That's a long time, A long wow.

887
00:38:11,520 --> 00:38:14,319
Speaker 1: Like I'm thinking we spent at least four hours just

888
00:38:14,360 --> 00:38:17,480
Speaker 1: sitting in his room discussing why he was so against

889
00:38:17,520 --> 00:38:20,200
Speaker 1: giving me anything all four hours?

890
00:38:20,600 --> 00:38:21,520
Speaker 2: Four hours?

891
00:38:22,000 --> 00:38:25,240
Speaker 1: Also, why was he so alright with me buying something

892
00:38:26,320 --> 00:38:29,520
Speaker 1: for my birthday? In Valentine's but not Christmas. I would

893
00:38:29,600 --> 00:38:32,280
Speaker 1: understand if it was for religious regions, but he clearly

894
00:38:32,320 --> 00:38:34,759
Speaker 1: stated it had nothing to do without. He blamed it

895
00:38:34,800 --> 00:38:41,040
Speaker 1: on his parents, which makes the next part even more interesting. Hmmm,

896
00:38:42,360 --> 00:38:45,319
Speaker 1: so his mother comes into the room.

897
00:38:45,440 --> 00:38:52,680
Speaker 3: Okay, mommy just pulled up, said what's what's up? Yes, mommy, mommy, mommy,

898
00:38:53,400 --> 00:38:57,000
Speaker 3: what's going on? Where my muscle? Mommy's yet? Flex your

899
00:38:57,520 --> 00:39:02,560
Speaker 3: flex your arms in the chat? Oh, asking us to

900
00:39:02,600 --> 00:39:04,839
Speaker 3: come into the living room. I knew they were leaving

901
00:39:04,880 --> 00:39:06,680
Speaker 3: on the twenty fourth for a small vacation, so I

902
00:39:06,719 --> 00:39:08,680
Speaker 3: was wondering if this was a small goodbye, or maybe

903
00:39:08,719 --> 00:39:11,640
Speaker 3: even perhaps a scold at us for yelling at each other.

904
00:39:11,880 --> 00:39:14,440
Speaker 3: The house is big, but I don't doubt that they

905
00:39:14,440 --> 00:39:15,359
Speaker 3: could hear it a little bit.

906
00:39:15,520 --> 00:39:19,520
Speaker 1: And then I was speechless. Sitting on the effing dining

907
00:39:19,560 --> 00:39:25,279
Speaker 1: table are his parents and six rapped gifts. I look

908
00:39:25,320 --> 00:39:29,359
Speaker 1: at him like, really, you don't celebrate giving presents on

909
00:39:29,440 --> 00:39:31,879
Speaker 1: Christmas because your parents are against it?

910
00:39:31,960 --> 00:39:35,080
Speaker 2: But they do. The parents sat us.

911
00:39:34,960 --> 00:39:37,000
Speaker 1: Down and gave us each a gift and told us

912
00:39:37,080 --> 00:39:40,719
Speaker 1: to open it now and we'd have our own small Christmas.

913
00:39:41,160 --> 00:39:43,440
Speaker 1: Just a day before I opened it, and it was

914
00:39:43,480 --> 00:39:48,520
Speaker 1: a lovely gift. I thanked them all while staring down

915
00:39:48,600 --> 00:39:52,359
Speaker 1: my boyfriend mentally, I was a little annoyed. And then

916
00:39:52,440 --> 00:40:00,080
Speaker 1: this happens. He starts scrinning. Okay, well I'm glaring, so

917
00:40:00,120 --> 00:40:02,759
Speaker 1: he takes out a gift for me. What the f

918
00:40:02,960 --> 00:40:07,200
Speaker 1: is actually going on? He hands me the gift and

919
00:40:07,360 --> 00:40:15,880
Speaker 1: it's a Suavorski necklace, looking pretty expensive bend. He smiles.

920
00:40:16,080 --> 00:40:18,920
Speaker 1: The parents leave to give us some space, and I

921
00:40:19,000 --> 00:40:24,000
Speaker 1: smile back, still really effing confused. He said it was

922
00:40:24,080 --> 00:40:25,960
Speaker 1: hard to try and hide his gift while I was

923
00:40:26,040 --> 00:40:29,120
Speaker 1: yelling at him earlier, but all along he had made

924
00:40:29,120 --> 00:40:30,000
Speaker 1: an exception for me.

925
00:40:30,200 --> 00:40:31,280
Speaker 2: All of it was a surprise.

926
00:40:31,760 --> 00:40:34,640
Speaker 1: He didn't believe in present giving, but still had bought

927
00:40:34,719 --> 00:40:36,719
Speaker 1: me one anyways, just because he thought.

928
00:40:36,480 --> 00:40:38,120
Speaker 2: I deserved it. Very cute.

929
00:40:38,360 --> 00:40:40,839
Speaker 1: So at this point he still doesn't believe in giving

930
00:40:40,880 --> 00:40:43,480
Speaker 1: anyone presents, but he did buy me one. I was

931
00:40:43,520 --> 00:40:46,480
Speaker 1: immediately really happy and I hugged him. It's a lovely necklace,

932
00:40:46,480 --> 00:40:49,200
Speaker 1: and I apologized over and over again for yelling. We

933
00:40:49,239 --> 00:40:51,080
Speaker 1: had a really nice time and head back to the

934
00:40:51,120 --> 00:40:53,839
Speaker 1: bedroom and watch TV, cuddling and having a sweet time,

935
00:40:54,200 --> 00:40:56,719
Speaker 1: and he then asked for his present. I tell him

936
00:40:56,800 --> 00:40:59,480
Speaker 1: I've opened them already and kept them for myself, so

937
00:40:59,480 --> 00:41:01,280
Speaker 1: I'm we need to time to buy a new one.

938
00:41:01,880 --> 00:41:06,960
Speaker 1: He suddenly becomes furious. Oh we're not We're not all

939
00:41:07,000 --> 00:41:12,040
Speaker 1: the woods yet, guys. It's it's going back. I explained,

940
00:41:12,040 --> 00:41:14,160
Speaker 1: he told me that he wasn't going to get me something,

941
00:41:14,200 --> 00:41:16,759
Speaker 1: so obviously I wasn't going to be giving him one

942
00:41:17,360 --> 00:41:19,719
Speaker 1: if I wasn't supposed to expect anything back.

943
00:41:20,680 --> 00:41:25,080
Speaker 3: Obviously, So so op is like he didn't give me

944
00:41:25,120 --> 00:41:29,440
Speaker 3: anyone anything, And now is like feeling.

945
00:41:29,239 --> 00:41:32,520
Speaker 1: A little, you know, a little tit for tat, you know,

946
00:41:32,600 --> 00:41:34,240
Speaker 1: a little little petty revenge.

947
00:41:34,440 --> 00:41:35,759
Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't know if I like that that she

948
00:41:36,000 --> 00:41:37,160
Speaker 2: that she got into.

949
00:41:39,200 --> 00:41:41,399
Speaker 1: He gets really mad, saying that I should have kept

950
00:41:41,400 --> 00:41:43,680
Speaker 1: the present for him because in the end, he did

951
00:41:43,719 --> 00:41:47,000
Speaker 1: get me something, But how was I supposed to know that.

952
00:41:47,440 --> 00:41:51,160
Speaker 1: He begins to scream about how I'm an ungrateful cow

953
00:41:51,680 --> 00:41:54,319
Speaker 1: what and how he shouldn't spend a penny on me.

954
00:41:55,840 --> 00:42:00,520
Speaker 3: Dude, this guy's what. This guy's whack. Also, cows are

955
00:42:00,560 --> 00:42:02,440
Speaker 3: like one of the most grateful animals.

956
00:42:03,239 --> 00:42:05,719
Speaker 1: His mother comes in, tells him to calm down and

957
00:42:05,800 --> 00:42:07,959
Speaker 1: screams at me to leave the house and he never

958
00:42:08,000 --> 00:42:09,080
Speaker 1: wants to see me again.

959
00:42:09,800 --> 00:42:15,080
Speaker 2: I do Wow, Oh my god, that escalated. Wow.

960
00:42:15,440 --> 00:42:18,319
Speaker 1: I do I take the necklace? Perhaps a bad move,

961
00:42:18,880 --> 00:42:20,880
Speaker 1: I explained. I will buy him a new gift, a

962
00:42:20,920 --> 00:42:23,880
Speaker 1: better one, and he's still too angry at me to understand.

963
00:42:23,920 --> 00:42:28,319
Speaker 1: He only needs a day to wait. I left and

964
00:42:28,480 --> 00:42:33,760
Speaker 1: came home really e f and confused. I tried calling

965
00:42:33,800 --> 00:42:36,560
Speaker 1: and he hasn't answered. I've been calling since I left

966
00:42:36,600 --> 00:42:39,000
Speaker 1: the house three hours ago. Guys, I don't know what

967
00:42:39,040 --> 00:42:41,600
Speaker 1: to do. I'm so effing confused, and today has been

968
00:42:41,640 --> 00:42:44,680
Speaker 1: one heck of a day. Any advice is appreciated. I'm

969
00:42:44,719 --> 00:42:47,400
Speaker 1: thinking of going back there tomorrow. I'm sorry if this

970
00:42:47,480 --> 00:42:49,200
Speaker 1: wasn't written in the best way. My head is all

971
00:42:49,200 --> 00:42:51,760
Speaker 1: over the place. I've also spoken to my best friends

972
00:42:51,760 --> 00:42:55,879
Speaker 1: and they're confused as heck. Thanks in advance read flog.

973
00:42:57,040 --> 00:42:59,319
Speaker 1: My boyfriend dumped me during a family crisis. Two years

974
00:42:59,400 --> 00:43:01,680
Speaker 1: later I found out, but he was lying about everything. Well,

975
00:43:01,920 --> 00:43:05,279
Speaker 1: so buckle up, breddits. This is a long wild riot.

976
00:43:05,480 --> 00:43:09,600
Speaker 1: Oh ex, my ex thirty mail and I twenty eight female,

977
00:43:09,719 --> 00:43:11,960
Speaker 1: had this on again, off again thing for years, but

978
00:43:12,000 --> 00:43:14,200
Speaker 1: the last five years were pretty steady. He told me

979
00:43:14,239 --> 00:43:17,080
Speaker 1: early on, like three months in, that he had attachment issues.

980
00:43:17,400 --> 00:43:20,640
Speaker 1: Every breakup was because things got too much for him,

981
00:43:20,719 --> 00:43:23,160
Speaker 1: but he always came crawling back, and I always took

982
00:43:23,239 --> 00:43:26,200
Speaker 1: him back. One time, I even started seeing someone else,

983
00:43:26,440 --> 00:43:29,000
Speaker 1: but he begged me to come back, swearing therapy had

984
00:43:29,040 --> 00:43:32,000
Speaker 1: helped him grow. By the way, this comes from anxious

985
00:43:33,400 --> 00:43:36,080
Speaker 1: Panglin seven four seven to one on the r slash

986
00:43:36,120 --> 00:43:39,960
Speaker 1: Okay storytime separatus. So we managed a long distance relationship

987
00:43:40,000 --> 00:43:42,400
Speaker 1: for five years. Before that, we lived close together for

988
00:43:42,440 --> 00:43:46,320
Speaker 1: four years. We've been together for a total of nine years.

989
00:43:47,080 --> 00:43:47,319
Speaker 2: Wow.

990
00:43:48,160 --> 00:43:50,880
Speaker 1: He'd always have excuses for not moving in together, couldn't

991
00:43:50,920 --> 00:43:54,080
Speaker 1: find housing, wanted to work abroad, his studies, you name it.

992
00:43:54,480 --> 00:43:57,640
Speaker 1: In hindsight, these were just bs excuses to avoid living

993
00:43:57,680 --> 00:44:00,000
Speaker 1: with me. The last year of our relationship was right.

994
00:44:00,440 --> 00:44:02,760
Speaker 1: I wanted to live together, but he wouldn't make any moves.

995
00:44:02,840 --> 00:44:04,839
Speaker 1: We thought about it a lot. I felt like I

996
00:44:04,880 --> 00:44:08,640
Speaker 1: was never his priority. Work, money, and studies always came first.

997
00:44:09,600 --> 00:44:13,960
Speaker 1: Then came the week of the breakup. It was a disaster.

998
00:44:14,560 --> 00:44:16,799
Speaker 1: My shower and washing machine broke down first and I

999
00:44:16,800 --> 00:44:18,880
Speaker 1: had to get them repaired. Then my mom called to

1000
00:44:18,880 --> 00:44:20,880
Speaker 1: say that my grandma, who had been six for years,

1001
00:44:21,200 --> 00:44:23,600
Speaker 1: was rushed to the hospital and wasn't expected to survive.

1002
00:44:23,640 --> 00:44:26,719
Speaker 1: The night, I called my then boyfriend, completely emotional, and

1003
00:44:26,719 --> 00:44:30,680
Speaker 1: he reacted so indifferently. I knew something was off now.

1004
00:44:30,680 --> 00:44:33,080
Speaker 1: After pushing him, he finally admitted he'd been planning to

1005
00:44:33,120 --> 00:44:33,759
Speaker 1: break up with.

1006
00:44:33,680 --> 00:44:34,520
Speaker 2: Me that week.

1007
00:44:34,960 --> 00:44:36,400
Speaker 1: He planned to come by at the end of the

1008
00:44:36,440 --> 00:44:38,160
Speaker 1: week to do it before he went to his parents

1009
00:44:38,160 --> 00:44:41,200
Speaker 1: for a holiday celebration, which he obviously planned for me

1010
00:44:41,280 --> 00:44:44,120
Speaker 1: not to come to. He told me this on the

1011
00:44:44,120 --> 00:44:48,920
Speaker 1: phone right after I told him my grandma was passing away,

1012
00:44:50,920 --> 00:44:55,200
Speaker 1: timing brother. We agreed to meet at the end of

1013
00:44:55,239 --> 00:44:57,040
Speaker 1: the week to talk about it. The next day, my

1014
00:44:57,080 --> 00:44:59,880
Speaker 1: mom called again. She and her partner had had the

1015
00:45:00,640 --> 00:45:04,080
Speaker 1: so she couldn't visit her grandma. By Wednesday, my grandma

1016
00:45:04,239 --> 00:45:07,439
Speaker 1: got the VID too, but was still hanging on my mom,

1017
00:45:07,480 --> 00:45:10,240
Speaker 1: who doesn't drive, and her partner was too sick to drive,

1018
00:45:10,680 --> 00:45:14,120
Speaker 1: so me and her, despite her cover, decided to go

1019
00:45:14,760 --> 00:45:18,799
Speaker 1: one last time before she would pass away, and guess what,

1020
00:45:19,320 --> 00:45:22,239
Speaker 1: my car breaks down, so we had to take her

1021
00:45:22,239 --> 00:45:25,840
Speaker 1: partner's car just to visit my grandma. Just in time

1022
00:45:26,080 --> 00:45:30,920
Speaker 1: because the next day she passed away. Oh my god,

1023
00:45:30,960 --> 00:45:34,560
Speaker 1: this is like the worst week ever, opie geez. On Friday,

1024
00:45:34,680 --> 00:45:37,359
Speaker 1: my ex came over and we broke up officially. I

1025
00:45:37,400 --> 00:45:40,759
Speaker 1: told him I wanted no contact, by the way, I.

1026
00:45:40,760 --> 00:45:42,640
Speaker 3: Mean, I feel like it's been like back and forth,

1027
00:45:42,680 --> 00:45:46,200
Speaker 3: like NonStop. Yeah, I think I think going no contact

1028
00:45:46,200 --> 00:45:49,000
Speaker 3: with a relationship that is kind of like this wishy

1029
00:45:49,120 --> 00:45:49,960
Speaker 3: washy's a good Yeah.

1030
00:45:50,160 --> 00:45:53,759
Speaker 1: For nine years and nine years waiting for nine years,

1031
00:45:53,800 --> 00:45:57,640
Speaker 1: it's tough. By the way, not once that week did

1032
00:45:57,640 --> 00:45:59,319
Speaker 1: he ask me how I was doing or how my

1033
00:45:59,320 --> 00:46:02,719
Speaker 1: grandma was doing. After the breakup, I spiraled. I was

1034
00:46:02,760 --> 00:46:05,600
Speaker 1: on the brink of burnout. My boss sent me to

1035
00:46:05,640 --> 00:46:08,880
Speaker 1: the doctor because I was falling asleep at work. Eventually

1036
00:46:08,920 --> 00:46:10,319
Speaker 1: I quit because I couldn't.

1037
00:46:10,040 --> 00:46:10,760
Speaker 2: Take it anymore.

1038
00:46:11,040 --> 00:46:13,000
Speaker 1: I got to see a therapist and was diagnosed with

1039
00:46:13,040 --> 00:46:15,640
Speaker 1: a cyst on my thyroid, not related to my tiredness.

1040
00:46:15,680 --> 00:46:17,640
Speaker 1: I still don't have an official diagnosis for that.

1041
00:46:18,360 --> 00:46:18,600
Speaker 2: Now.

1042
00:46:18,640 --> 00:46:21,000
Speaker 1: I'm on a fifty two week waiting list for therapy

1043
00:46:21,080 --> 00:46:23,840
Speaker 1: because things are still really bad. I also developed a

1044
00:46:23,880 --> 00:46:26,560
Speaker 1: rare skin disease that is healed now, but it was horrible.

1045
00:46:26,600 --> 00:46:30,239
Speaker 1: My goodness, just so many things popping up. I did

1046
00:46:30,320 --> 00:46:33,160
Speaker 1: find another temporary job, which I am currently doing. But

1047
00:46:33,360 --> 00:46:36,279
Speaker 1: fast forward to now, I'm on vacation with some old

1048
00:46:36,360 --> 00:46:39,560
Speaker 1: college friends who are also friends with my ex. They

1049
00:46:39,560 --> 00:46:43,040
Speaker 1: told me he already has a new girlfriend and they're

1050
00:46:43,080 --> 00:46:43,800
Speaker 1: living together.

1051
00:46:45,600 --> 00:46:46,000
Speaker 2: Wow.

1052
00:46:46,239 --> 00:46:48,960
Speaker 1: I think our boy did not follow the you know,

1053
00:46:49,160 --> 00:46:53,960
Speaker 1: a month per year rule, particularly with moving in with

1054
00:46:54,040 --> 00:46:57,440
Speaker 1: the girlfriend. My goodness, I practically begged him for you.

1055
00:46:57,600 --> 00:47:00,719
Speaker 2: Oh, that's right. I forgot about that.

1056
00:47:01,520 --> 00:47:04,840
Speaker 1: I practically begged him for years to move in together,

1057
00:47:05,400 --> 00:47:06,919
Speaker 1: but he always put it off.

1058
00:47:07,080 --> 00:47:08,400
Speaker 2: Nine years. Oh pe wait.

1059
00:47:08,560 --> 00:47:11,919
Speaker 3: I feel like that's also a classic thing where it's

1060
00:47:11,960 --> 00:47:14,799
Speaker 3: like someone stays in a relationship that's not working and

1061
00:47:14,920 --> 00:47:16,840
Speaker 3: the person's like, oh, like you know, like that's just

1062
00:47:16,880 --> 00:47:18,640
Speaker 3: not me, you know, I would never get married, and

1063
00:47:18,640 --> 00:47:20,439
Speaker 3: then the next relationship they get married or something.

1064
00:47:20,680 --> 00:47:21,640
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1065
00:47:21,760 --> 00:47:22,080
Speaker 4: God.

1066
00:47:23,040 --> 00:47:24,520
Speaker 2: Oh.

1067
00:47:24,640 --> 00:47:26,799
Speaker 1: He told me when we broke up that he wanted

1068
00:47:26,840 --> 00:47:29,160
Speaker 1: to focus on his career and studies, and I was

1069
00:47:29,200 --> 00:47:32,040
Speaker 1: in the way. My friend saw him last in February.

1070
00:47:32,200 --> 00:47:34,799
Speaker 1: We broke up about a year earlier in December, so

1071
00:47:35,000 --> 00:47:37,680
Speaker 1: barely a year after our breakup, he is living with

1072
00:47:37,760 --> 00:47:40,600
Speaker 1: his new girlfriend, even though he refused to move in

1073
00:47:40,680 --> 00:47:43,920
Speaker 1: with me after four years of begging. But here's the kicker.

1074
00:47:44,280 --> 00:47:49,920
Speaker 1: His new girlfriend is French. Wee all, two months before

1075
00:47:49,960 --> 00:47:53,279
Speaker 1: we broke up, before the relationship ended, I.

1076
00:47:53,239 --> 00:47:55,400
Speaker 2: See us in the chat. He went on a trip

1077
00:47:55,440 --> 00:47:58,480
Speaker 2: to France alone because he needed to think.

1078
00:47:59,120 --> 00:48:02,040
Speaker 3: Oh is thinking about that those French ladies.

1079
00:48:02,200 --> 00:48:08,520
Speaker 1: He's thinking about that lady wantsole Okay, huge red flag.

1080
00:48:08,560 --> 00:48:11,720
Speaker 1: In hindsight, I'm certain he met her there or even earlier,

1081
00:48:11,760 --> 00:48:13,440
Speaker 1: as he has been to France and worked for a

1082
00:48:13,440 --> 00:48:16,600
Speaker 1: French company in Africa before. I did some internet salu

1083
00:48:16,680 --> 00:48:19,760
Speaker 1: thing with information from my college friend. My ex doesn't

1084
00:48:19,760 --> 00:48:22,239
Speaker 1: have social media, so I couldn't get information from there,

1085
00:48:22,840 --> 00:48:26,359
Speaker 1: and I found her. Her LinkedIn says she's a veterinarian

1086
00:48:26,640 --> 00:48:28,880
Speaker 1: from the same area as he told me he had

1087
00:48:28,920 --> 00:48:33,399
Speaker 1: been visiting two months before we broke up. He even

1088
00:48:33,440 --> 00:48:36,000
Speaker 1: told me that he was visiting an old friend from

1089
00:48:36,040 --> 00:48:38,440
Speaker 1: his time in Africa and her veterinarian friend.

1090
00:48:39,160 --> 00:48:42,239
Speaker 3: Oh oh, so this is the veterinarian friend.

1091
00:48:42,320 --> 00:48:48,879
Speaker 1: That's this dude, that's the oh no, oh no him

1092
00:48:48,960 --> 00:48:53,759
Speaker 1: he told on himself. Wow, he's trying. He was trying

1093
00:48:53,760 --> 00:48:55,600
Speaker 1: to like what trickle truth that you know? It's like, oh,

1094
00:48:55,680 --> 00:48:56,360
Speaker 1: let me sprinkle a.

1095
00:48:56,360 --> 00:48:59,960
Speaker 2: Little bit, But dude, she's away. You messed up?

1096
00:49:00,040 --> 00:49:02,879
Speaker 1: Yep, h one and one is two right. Let's see

1097
00:49:02,880 --> 00:49:05,440
Speaker 1: where you're going, Opie. She doesn't have a job or

1098
00:49:05,480 --> 00:49:08,319
Speaker 1: studies here or study here, which I got from my

1099
00:49:08,719 --> 00:49:12,759
Speaker 1: college friends and her LinkedIn which also specifically stated that

1100
00:49:12,800 --> 00:49:15,840
Speaker 1: she's looking for a job in the city that my

1101
00:49:15,960 --> 00:49:20,399
Speaker 1: ex lives in. So she must have moved here for him,

1102
00:49:20,719 --> 00:49:23,680
Speaker 1: not even a year after we broke up. Why else

1103
00:49:23,800 --> 00:49:27,080
Speaker 1: would she come here? The whole situation is so unreal.

1104
00:49:27,280 --> 00:49:29,759
Speaker 1: During our nine year relationship, he always told me he

1105
00:49:29,800 --> 00:49:32,839
Speaker 1: had difficulties with relationships, but really loved me and wanted

1106
00:49:32,880 --> 00:49:35,160
Speaker 1: to be with me, even though it scared him. Most

1107
00:49:35,160 --> 00:49:37,640
Speaker 1: of the time, things were great despite the long distance.

1108
00:49:38,000 --> 00:49:40,680
Speaker 1: I always joke to others that I wasn't scared he

1109
00:49:40,719 --> 00:49:43,560
Speaker 1: would cheat because one girl was already too much for him.

1110
00:49:44,000 --> 00:49:46,600
Speaker 1: So how can he now move on so quickly after

1111
00:49:46,719 --> 00:49:49,880
Speaker 1: nine years and suddenly his attachment if issues are.

1112
00:49:50,600 --> 00:49:53,160
Speaker 2: Gone, why waste everywhere? It's his time too?

1113
00:49:53,239 --> 00:49:57,720
Speaker 1: Like it doesn't oh man, so moving in together probably

1114
00:49:57,800 --> 00:50:00,640
Speaker 1: less than a year. It's so absurd and just doesn't

1115
00:50:00,680 --> 00:50:02,840
Speaker 1: sound like the man I knew and loved for nine years.

1116
00:50:03,160 --> 00:50:05,920
Speaker 1: Opie says, I feel so betrayed and lied to, like

1117
00:50:06,000 --> 00:50:08,480
Speaker 1: how gaslighted an egotistic it is to break up a

1118
00:50:08,520 --> 00:50:11,000
Speaker 1: summon during a family crisis because you fell in love

1119
00:50:11,040 --> 00:50:14,880
Speaker 1: with another girl. Good question, Opie, at it since everyone

1120
00:50:14,880 --> 00:50:16,640
Speaker 1: seems to be hung up on the internet, Sally thing,

1121
00:50:16,719 --> 00:50:19,600
Speaker 1: I looked her up one night that my college friends

1122
00:50:19,600 --> 00:50:21,799
Speaker 1: told me about her, and mostly because they couldn't remember

1123
00:50:21,840 --> 00:50:24,080
Speaker 1: her name. I just wanted to know if I knew her,

1124
00:50:24,320 --> 00:50:26,680
Speaker 1: says my excident have social media. I went through all

1125
00:50:26,719 --> 00:50:29,719
Speaker 1: of his LinkedIn connections and found her and found through

1126
00:50:29,760 --> 00:50:33,080
Speaker 1: there that information and put and I put two and

1127
00:50:33,120 --> 00:50:36,000
Speaker 1: two together. Now that I know who she is, that's

1128
00:50:36,000 --> 00:50:38,080
Speaker 1: all you needed to know. And I am not stalking

1129
00:50:38,080 --> 00:50:42,080
Speaker 1: her and won't be looking her up again. Hey it's

1130
00:50:42,120 --> 00:50:43,680
Speaker 1: John here, og host of the show. We're going to

1131
00:50:43,719 --> 00:50:45,319
Speaker 1: get back to these juicy stories. But here's a quick

1132
00:50:45,360 --> 00:50:47,000
Speaker 1: three minutes of ads from our sponsors.

1133
00:50:47,480 --> 00:50:50,720
Speaker 3: My boyfriend's family looks down on me, and I can't

1134
00:50:50,760 --> 00:50:51,680
Speaker 3: take it anymore.

1135
00:50:51,880 --> 00:50:52,319
Speaker 2: Look up.

1136
00:50:52,719 --> 00:50:55,000
Speaker 3: I am twenty seven female, and I am a nurse.

1137
00:50:55,080 --> 00:50:57,000
Speaker 3: I make a good salary as a private nurse for

1138
00:50:57,040 --> 00:51:00,880
Speaker 3: a firm which provides care for rich families. Sick figures

1139
00:51:00,960 --> 00:51:03,600
Speaker 3: in my country, not the USA, and I'm proud of

1140
00:51:03,640 --> 00:51:05,759
Speaker 3: my career. I wanted to be a doctor when I

1141
00:51:05,800 --> 00:51:07,760
Speaker 3: was a teen, but it was impossible for my family

1142
00:51:07,800 --> 00:51:10,239
Speaker 3: to provide me with a medical education, and at the

1143
00:51:10,239 --> 00:51:12,799
Speaker 3: time I felt self hate to be a nurse. By

1144
00:51:12,800 --> 00:51:15,600
Speaker 3: the way, this comes from Drastic Measure sixteen And if

1145
00:51:15,600 --> 00:51:17,080
Speaker 3: you want to submit your own stories, go to the

1146
00:51:17,200 --> 00:51:21,160
Speaker 3: r slash Okay storytime sub right. So, by the age

1147
00:51:21,200 --> 00:51:24,560
Speaker 3: of twenty, I became a nurse, but now I love it.

1148
00:51:25,040 --> 00:51:28,160
Speaker 3: This job is made possible for me to buy my

1149
00:51:28,239 --> 00:51:31,080
Speaker 3: own house, car and travel outside the country. I have

1150
00:51:31,120 --> 00:51:33,480
Speaker 3: a good pension plan and other savings. I can raise

1151
00:51:33,520 --> 00:51:36,440
Speaker 3: a family on my own income. I have Slash had

1152
00:51:36,480 --> 00:51:40,719
Speaker 3: a boyfriend, Rob, twenty eight male who is in to

1153
00:51:41,000 --> 00:51:45,080
Speaker 3: heart specialty, and we fell in love during hospital visits.

1154
00:51:45,320 --> 00:51:47,919
Speaker 3: He was the one to pursue me. He is soon

1155
00:51:48,040 --> 00:51:51,360
Speaker 3: going to be a heart surgeon, nurse surgeon commos pretty

1156
00:51:51,360 --> 00:51:54,120
Speaker 3: good nice. His mom has always made passive aggressive comments

1157
00:51:54,160 --> 00:51:56,680
Speaker 3: about me being a nurse. We got engaged recently and

1158
00:51:56,760 --> 00:51:58,720
Speaker 3: all of his relatives were at the family dinner party

1159
00:51:59,000 --> 00:52:01,799
Speaker 3: held by Rob's parent last week. So his mom and

1160
00:52:01,880 --> 00:52:05,520
Speaker 3: aunts at the dinner table joked around that the heart

1161
00:52:05,600 --> 00:52:09,400
Speaker 3: surgeon like Rob can get any female doctor as his wife.

1162
00:52:10,000 --> 00:52:13,360
Speaker 3: Rob took offense and said nia me is very much independent.

1163
00:52:13,360 --> 00:52:15,600
Speaker 3: It makes a good salary herself to take care of

1164
00:52:15,640 --> 00:52:20,080
Speaker 3: the whole family. But his mom went on that wasn't enough.

1165
00:52:20,840 --> 00:52:24,200
Speaker 3: I have had enough. I have respect for housewives, but

1166
00:52:24,320 --> 00:52:27,360
Speaker 3: this time I fired back. I said his mom and

1167
00:52:27,400 --> 00:52:31,560
Speaker 3: aunts are all gold digging housewives with no life skills

1168
00:52:32,000 --> 00:52:33,800
Speaker 3: outside of raising kids.

1169
00:52:34,920 --> 00:52:36,400
Speaker 2: Boom got him.

1170
00:52:37,280 --> 00:52:39,960
Speaker 3: They live on their husband's money, who are rich. Some

1171
00:52:40,000 --> 00:52:45,240
Speaker 3: of them started crying, some shouted, Everyone, including Rob, asked

1172
00:52:45,239 --> 00:52:49,319
Speaker 3: me to apologize. I broke up with him on the

1173
00:52:49,360 --> 00:52:53,719
Speaker 3: spot and said I will not sell myself and my

1174
00:52:53,800 --> 00:52:57,600
Speaker 3: self respect for his family. I'd rather marry a normal

1175
00:52:57,640 --> 00:53:01,920
Speaker 3: man than a surgeon whose family doesn't resp I left Rob,

1176
00:53:02,520 --> 00:53:05,319
Speaker 3: who was begging for a chance. I know he tried

1177
00:53:05,360 --> 00:53:07,600
Speaker 3: to silence his mom, but I don't see the future.

1178
00:53:07,920 --> 00:53:10,040
Speaker 3: I see a lifetime of taunts, and I can't ask

1179
00:53:10,120 --> 00:53:12,600
Speaker 3: him to cut off his parents, which he won't do. Anyways,

1180
00:53:13,040 --> 00:53:14,880
Speaker 3: my parents are saying he is a good catch and

1181
00:53:14,920 --> 00:53:17,840
Speaker 3: to ignore his mom's comments. But money isn't everything, and

1182
00:53:17,920 --> 00:53:20,360
Speaker 3: social status is and everything I don't want to be

1183
00:53:20,360 --> 00:53:22,600
Speaker 3: looked down upon, but I miss him and it is

1184
00:53:22,719 --> 00:53:26,080
Speaker 3: breaking my heart. Edit more to add, he has tried

1185
00:53:26,080 --> 00:53:28,840
Speaker 3: to stop their comments. Whenever I told him it bothered me,

1186
00:53:28,920 --> 00:53:31,239
Speaker 3: he said, try to ignore. And whenever he tried to

1187
00:53:31,320 --> 00:53:34,000
Speaker 3: argue with them, they just said and he shouldn't disrespect

1188
00:53:34,040 --> 00:53:38,200
Speaker 3: his elders. Also, after marriage, we would have shifted to

1189
00:53:38,280 --> 00:53:41,520
Speaker 3: the house next door to the family, so you would

1190
00:53:41,520 --> 00:53:44,280
Speaker 3: be in close proximity with all this family. That's oh,

1191
00:53:44,320 --> 00:53:45,080
Speaker 3: given kind.

1192
00:53:44,880 --> 00:53:48,040
Speaker 2: Of oh yeah, that's yeah.

1193
00:53:48,440 --> 00:53:50,560
Speaker 3: I would never have peace in my life. And that's

1194
00:53:50,560 --> 00:53:54,359
Speaker 3: what I realized. He will never cut them off, nor

1195
00:53:54,400 --> 00:53:59,440
Speaker 3: will I force anyone. It's better to end it. And

1196
00:53:59,480 --> 00:54:04,719
Speaker 3: we got some updates. But it seems like Reddit was

1197
00:54:04,880 --> 00:54:07,480
Speaker 3: not the a hole, which I feel like I agree with.

1198
00:54:07,560 --> 00:54:09,120
Speaker 3: I mean, that's a lot to deal with for him.

1199
00:54:09,360 --> 00:54:11,799
Speaker 1: Yes, this is true, it's like what also, why do

1200
00:54:11,840 --> 00:54:14,120
Speaker 1: we have to what was the thing?

1201
00:54:14,480 --> 00:54:18,239
Speaker 3: The reason why? Yeah, we got an update. So Rob

1202
00:54:18,239 --> 00:54:20,759
Speaker 3: and I met after that event. A few days after

1203
00:54:20,760 --> 00:54:22,959
Speaker 3: I made the original post. He came to my place

1204
00:54:23,000 --> 00:54:25,960
Speaker 3: to discuss. My brother was there, but I sent him

1205
00:54:25,960 --> 00:54:27,919
Speaker 3: to the other room before Rob came, and he didn't

1206
00:54:27,960 --> 00:54:30,160
Speaker 3: know my brother was there. I just wanted to be secure.

1207
00:54:30,280 --> 00:54:33,319
Speaker 3: I think like brother for protection. He cried, and I

1208
00:54:33,400 --> 00:54:35,840
Speaker 3: cried too, but I told him the only way it

1209
00:54:35,920 --> 00:54:38,000
Speaker 3: is possible for me to get with him is that

1210
00:54:38,040 --> 00:54:40,840
Speaker 3: we have to shift far from his parents and have

1211
00:54:41,000 --> 00:54:44,919
Speaker 3: limited contact from my side with his family and our

1212
00:54:45,040 --> 00:54:48,400
Speaker 3: future kids. He said it is impossible, and his family

1213
00:54:48,400 --> 00:54:50,839
Speaker 3: will be a great support system for us. He told

1214
00:54:50,840 --> 00:54:52,960
Speaker 3: me he will make a huge amount of money and

1215
00:54:53,000 --> 00:54:55,399
Speaker 3: I can continue part time when we have kids, as

1216
00:54:55,440 --> 00:54:58,040
Speaker 3: he will pay me around my salary to spend time

1217
00:54:58,080 --> 00:55:00,520
Speaker 3: with the kids. My independence is something i've val and

1218
00:55:00,600 --> 00:55:03,759
Speaker 3: I refuse. I told him that his mother will not

1219
00:55:03,880 --> 00:55:06,480
Speaker 3: raise my kids and I won't leave my job. He

1220
00:55:06,560 --> 00:55:11,880
Speaker 3: got angry and our discussion became heated and in anger.

1221
00:55:12,080 --> 00:55:15,040
Speaker 3: He slapped me hard and literally ripped my shirt when

1222
00:55:15,040 --> 00:55:17,600
Speaker 3: he held my arm. God, I'm a five nine woman,

1223
00:55:17,640 --> 00:55:20,000
Speaker 3: but a six foot muscly man made me realize how

1224
00:55:20,040 --> 00:55:22,920
Speaker 3: weak I felt physically at that moment. I called my

1225
00:55:22,960 --> 00:55:26,000
Speaker 3: brother out, and when he saw blood form my nose

1226
00:55:26,040 --> 00:55:29,560
Speaker 3: and a ripped shirt, he lost it and beat rob

1227
00:55:29,640 --> 00:55:32,600
Speaker 3: to a pulp so much that I had to stop him.

1228
00:55:32,880 --> 00:55:35,400
Speaker 3: In the end, we called the family and the police.

1229
00:55:35,400 --> 00:55:38,800
Speaker 3: Got involved, and it was decided he won't press charges

1230
00:55:38,880 --> 00:55:41,440
Speaker 3: if I don't because it will ruin his career. And

1231
00:55:41,560 --> 00:55:45,080
Speaker 3: I also wanted no trouble for my brother. But I

1232
00:55:45,080 --> 00:55:49,759
Speaker 3: have a restraining order and process. The relationship is all over.

1233
00:55:50,280 --> 00:55:53,360
Speaker 3: My love went to zero with that slap of his

1234
00:55:53,360 --> 00:55:57,239
Speaker 3: His mother begged me not to file charges. Weel a

1235
00:55:57,239 --> 00:55:59,600
Speaker 3: little bit more to the story anyways, Thanks for it

1236
00:55:59,680 --> 00:56:02,160
Speaker 3: for opening my eyes. I never knew my ex was

1237
00:56:02,200 --> 00:56:04,440
Speaker 3: like this before this incident because he never raised a

1238
00:56:04,440 --> 00:56:06,719
Speaker 3: hand to me. If my brother wasn't there, I don't

1239
00:56:06,760 --> 00:56:08,560
Speaker 3: know what could have happened to me. I got a

1240
00:56:08,600 --> 00:56:10,640
Speaker 3: camera installed a couple of days back. Though, I will

1241
00:56:10,680 --> 00:56:13,120
Speaker 3: sell this house and buy a house in my parents' neighborhood.

1242
00:56:13,640 --> 00:56:16,279
Speaker 3: This is a finished chapter of my life and I

1243
00:56:16,320 --> 00:56:19,319
Speaker 3: will not date someone for months. I am going to

1244
00:56:19,400 --> 00:56:21,839
Speaker 3: a three week trip to Europe this summer and want

1245
00:56:21,880 --> 00:56:25,800
Speaker 3: to heal my heart and soul. This is my final updates.

1246
00:56:27,080 --> 00:56:27,720
Speaker 3: Thank you,