Speaker 1: What's up on that scas. Welcome to the first episode
Speaker 1: of No Filter with Michael Blackson. I'm your host, Michael Blackson.
Speaker 1: I'm here with of course, Hey, this is Chinese best
Speaker 1: friend Mike. Finally, the whole world get to see what
Speaker 1: your thoughts are in your mouth. The African King of
Speaker 1: Comedies podcasts. Well listen, man, you know I have a
Speaker 1: wonderful show for you guys tonight. We have a wonderful
Speaker 1: show for you guys tonight. Since I didn't start the
Speaker 1: show January. First, I'm gonna do a recap of what
Speaker 1: has been like. But before we even do that, I'm
Speaker 1: gonna let you guys know my special special guest tonight
Speaker 1: is a very good friend of mine, very funny comedian.
Speaker 1: He's been a comic view He's been in the movies
Speaker 1: like I think like a man Daddy day here and
Speaker 1: meet the Blacks. I'm sure you've heard of him, unless
Speaker 1: you're white. He's a tinner Marie of comedy. My nague
Speaker 1: got Gary Owens in the house tonight, so it's gonna
Speaker 1: be a lot of fun. Just have recap of know
Speaker 1: what year I think everybody died? I think we probably
Speaker 1: only ones alive from a recap of Okay, let's go
Speaker 1: back to the beginning. Let's see what happened in the
Speaker 1: beginning of this year Trump supporters. Okay, I mean, I've
Speaker 1: never seen white people this pissed ever in my damn life. Okay,
Speaker 1: I mean, these guys stormed into the capital to take
Speaker 1: back a country that they store in the first place.
Speaker 1: The last person that ran up into a builder to
Speaker 1: take best some ship that belonged to himself, it was
Speaker 1: just Simpson, and we knew where the fun that ship
Speaker 1: ended up in jail, motherfucker. Exactly where these fucker's need
Speaker 1: to be orangail like Oh j okay, I mean white
Speaker 1: people were very piste and they were even more pissed
Speaker 1: in nine when Magic Johnson Lakers beat Larry Bird Celtics. Okay,
Speaker 1: that's how it pissed. Trump supporters were America as a
Speaker 1: new president. That's right, he's a new welcome United States
Speaker 1: got a new press that this new president is old
Speaker 1: as fun. It's like a heaven Biden. It as a
Speaker 1: president is like getting a brand new iPhone too, like
Speaker 1: an old new president. It's like getting a Michael Jordan's
Speaker 1: retrol sneakers for for Christmas, like I just come to
Speaker 1: old New Nika. That's what I'm gonna called Biden from
Speaker 1: here on. Of course, we got the first ever female
Speaker 1: vice president, give it the first female vice president. I mean,
Speaker 1: this woman has a whole bunch of nationalities in her.
Speaker 1: She's mixed with everything. I mean, she has more nationalities
Speaker 1: in her than Kim Kadash has had in her. What
Speaker 1: else happened in gorilla glue? That's right, gorilla glue on here.
Speaker 1: It was stuck in her hair for a very long time. Okay,
Speaker 1: meal hair was stiffer than than than a white person
Speaker 1: on soul trained. Okay, the bitch here was hard as fun.
Speaker 1: It was harder than Chinese math. Gorrilla glue. If you're listening,
Speaker 1: please make guerrilla glue condoms at least so we know
Speaker 1: that it won't come off and you will save a
Speaker 1: lot of us nigat some shot support. Uh shout out
Speaker 1: my nigga Tiger Wards, please make a speedy recovery, okay,
Speaker 1: because last time Tiger was injured this bad, his ex
Speaker 1: wife beat the ship out of that niggaut for sucking
Speaker 1: a bunch of bitches. So get well very soon. My
Speaker 1: nigga got Tiger Wards, I love you, uh, Lady Gaga. Um,
Speaker 1: she got a dog back. Okay, Wolf Wolf, shout out
Speaker 1: to the dog, the little chiguahwa, A little little congratulations.
Speaker 1: Congratulations to my girl. She got her puppy back, a
Speaker 1: little Chihuahua puppy dog. You know she plays. She put
Speaker 1: out a five hundred thousand dollars reward for the return
Speaker 1: of the dogs and no question asked, no question like
Speaker 1: she pretty much like, fuck her dog walker. They got
Speaker 1: shot the dog walker. Reward for the dog. No fucking
Speaker 1: work for the dog walker. Just bring my fucking puppy back. Okay,
Speaker 1: fuck that. That guy that's in the hospital sharing rooms
Speaker 1: with Tiger Woods, they don't go. She didn't go funk
Speaker 1: about the poor dog walker. Yeah that's crazy, man. I
Speaker 1: mean that guy took a bullet for the dog. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's crazy. This was three dogs, so one was held
Speaker 1: in his army and he was not letting that dog go.
Speaker 1: I mean, hes a gunshot for a fucking French pood.
Speaker 1: Yeah he deserved. Lady Guga deserves to throw at least
Speaker 1: like fifty dollar reward for the shooter, right or something. No,
Speaker 1: come on, man, it's nothing. There's no, zero reward for
Speaker 1: the shooter. The fucking guy is like bleeding to death
Speaker 1: with a fucking French poodle in his hand. And no,
Speaker 1: it's a French bulldog, not a bulldog. A poodle is
Speaker 1: less than the French bulldog. The poodles are cheaper fun regardless.
Speaker 1: It's fucking It wasn't lasting, motherfucker. You shouldn't let that
Speaker 1: dog go. What else happening in beginning to Yeah, Tom Brady,
Speaker 1: congratulations Tom Brady? Another super Bowl? Seven? Super Bowl? What
Speaker 1: this guy? This is? How great Tom Brady is? He's
Speaker 1: definitely the go to me. Like seven super Bowl. He
Speaker 1: went to a team they used to losing practice, I
Speaker 1: mean Tampa Bay, we're losing to themselves. He went to
Speaker 1: that team and fucking won the super Bowl. This guy
Speaker 1: could win the super Bowl with any fucking body. I
Speaker 1: guarantee you he can win a Supol with me. Morgan
Speaker 1: Freeman two Majors and kidling Jenna, Tim We're already for
Speaker 1: you just whenever I would be whatever I need to
Speaker 1: be with position you think i'll be good at, you'll
Speaker 1: be good at like the kicker, maybe catcher. You can't
Speaker 1: catch anything you Another recent news Bobby s Murder is
Speaker 1: out of jail. Congratulations by Murder. Congratulations man, this guy
Speaker 1: the six whole years. He even he even did more
Speaker 1: time just so his buddy could you less time? Wow?
Speaker 1: What a nice guy. Where is the Yeah, he's like
Speaker 1: I think actually shout out to him sticking in there.
Speaker 1: And the only thing that was really I was confused
Speaker 1: about because I mean, he's part of it. He's one
Speaker 1: of the leaders of the dog Skin Committee. Yes. Yeah,
Speaker 1: if I am midnight, he's definitely about a con is
Speaker 1: two m a com is like, So, I'm like, how
Speaker 1: the hell a guy, this dog staying jailed that long? Yeah,
Speaker 1: all nigger had to do with just close his eyes,
Speaker 1: walk out butt naked. After nine pm he would have
Speaker 1: been home. Okay, but thanks for coming home, uh my nigga? Yes,
Speaker 1: but yeah, besides that, Hey man, this is our first show.
Speaker 1: I'm excited. What else is going on? Very excited. Let's go.
Speaker 1: I hope there's a lot of people listening to us
Speaker 1: or not. I don't know. Let me tell you right now. Okay,
Speaker 1: this is no filter. Michael Blackson. If you're sensitive, don't
Speaker 1: fucking watch listen to the show. Martha Stewart is on
Speaker 1: the next block. Listen to Martha Stewart or Dion Warwick. Okay,
Speaker 1: let the show beginning. Motherfuck Yeah. Tuesday, March the second,
Speaker 1: Mothersucker t Tuz I'm Michael Black's I'm your host, Man,
Speaker 1: I got my Chinese best friend. Hey, it's Chinese best friend.
Speaker 1: Hey doing Mike, I'm good man. How's everything good? Just
Speaker 1: hanging in there? Tired of wearing a fucking mask? You're
Speaker 1: tired already? Yeah, mask everywhere everywhere you go, mask, mask, mask.
Speaker 1: I have to get used to it, man. I think
Speaker 1: it's gonna be around for many, many years. Really, like
Speaker 1: how many years? I would say at least, I don't know,
Speaker 1: three years, maybe three years. Michael Jackson has been wearing
Speaker 1: mask for thirty years exactly. He knew what then was
Speaker 1: going on. Yeah, he knew, he knew. He gave us
Speaker 1: a warning in advance, but no one listened. And even
Speaker 1: wearing gloves too. Yeah, would you start wearing gloves from
Speaker 1: now on every time you perform? I'm not wear the gloves, man,
Speaker 1: wear gloves for I don't know, to beat it, beat
Speaker 1: the corona? Great. I don't figure you're wearing today, Michael,
Speaker 1: Thank you man. Let's go yours first, you wear the
Speaker 1: Chicago Bulls had that has a Gucci sign on the left.
Speaker 1: What the funk? What is it Gucci in Chicago Bulls?
Speaker 1: Chicago Bulls, And I don't know what's the rest? Like, no,
Speaker 1: that there's a Gucci colors on your on the side
Speaker 1: of it. I had no idea, Mike, Yeah, I don't.
Speaker 1: I don't want I start wearing Gucci after they had
Speaker 1: that black face after that. Yeah, you're right, that's want
Speaker 1: to make fun of me when I would have a
Speaker 1: black face. Yeah, you you were putting all your Gucci
Speaker 1: outfit to donation. I haven't warned him yet since it's
Speaker 1: for sale, any No, I don't want to buy. This
Speaker 1: is not Guccio. I know it's not. Man. Yeah, Couci
Speaker 1: is not allowed in my in my house. What is
Speaker 1: this called your offer today? It looks really good. It
Speaker 1: looks like a kindergarten kid drew it all. What you're
Speaker 1: wearing microL Reduction. It's a clothing by this company called Embellish.
Speaker 1: But then I got the Fisacce belt with the Versacci shoes.
Speaker 1: This is what I do. You know what we have
Speaker 1: to start doing like women women only by expensive bags
Speaker 1: and expensive shoes and they throw some bullshit fashion over
Speaker 1: or some fucking easy pickings or some ship from fucking
Speaker 1: forever twenty two, wherever the the age is. That's what
Speaker 1: to do. They just care about the expensive shoes and
Speaker 1: the purse, because long we have expensive shoes at a
Speaker 1: nice purse, they're going automaically assume your oftfite is expensive.
Speaker 1: The average outfit of a fucking woman is twelve dollars
Speaker 1: and eighty cents, and then the average price of the
Speaker 1: bag is three thousand dollars and the shoes is a
Speaker 1: thousand dollars, So that's spending four thousand and twelve dollars
Speaker 1: and eighty cents. You're really good at math, math microp luction,
Speaker 1: old ace. At math, I was social studies and science.
Speaker 1: I wasn't a big I didn't care much about science.
Speaker 1: I didn't care about chemistry was so fucking hard for me.
Speaker 1: What was what your hot subject was? Something you have
Speaker 1: problem with school? Have a problem with mechanics class? Yeah,
Speaker 1: I couldn't put the engine together. But that's like ectra
Speaker 1: curricul like, just like I had cooking, you have mechanics. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I had cooking too. I had cooking because I like to. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I didn't learn anything there, and just so you did
Speaker 1: a mechanic. That's why you know so much about cars.
Speaker 1: Everytime you almost blow up on us, pick you up
Speaker 1: when the range rover and it's literally blow up on
Speaker 1: us and smoking, don't worry. It's easy to fix. Drove
Speaker 1: you back home two minutes. And then why was it
Speaker 1: when I was it smoking in the first place? No,
Speaker 1: it was just a little host problem. Yeah, your problems. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's a host league. The story of your life, those problems,
Speaker 1: his host problems. Yeah, you're longer than on leak. You
Speaker 1: know my host the leak only nothing and fixed the
Speaker 1: leaking problem. Other zoom. What shirt is that when you're wearing. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm wearing it's a triple old G shirt given to
Speaker 1: me by Michael Blackson. I'll give you that. Yeah, you
Speaker 1: give me this every I didn't give you that ship,
Speaker 1: every fucking health and I'm wearing you give to me.
Speaker 1: It was free closes from like people that make them.
Speaker 1: Yeah it looks nice and yeah, you're saving some money
Speaker 1: at least. Yeah, it looks it looks like uh, it
Speaker 1: looks like the old Couci Couci Gucci, not Gucci. What's Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's like c O O G I or something couci.
Speaker 1: That's it. Like we're begging to me to wear back
Speaker 1: in the day and like run DMC. Yeah, it's an
Speaker 1: old brand from back in the day. Nobody wears no more.
Speaker 1: Just like nobody huh, nobody fucking wear the ship and
Speaker 1: nobody in their right mind. Maybe you know who's wearing
Speaker 1: those now. Guys who go to jail come out of
Speaker 1: jail and then they've been going for thirty years and
Speaker 1: have no clue that things have changed. It's the same thing.
Speaker 1: It's my life, Mike, what the fuck? No, no, no, no,
Speaker 1: These guys will go to jail for thirty years to
Speaker 1: come out and they go put an old jewelry on.
Speaker 1: I'm like, motherfucking nobody's wearing a herring bone anymore. Okay,
Speaker 1: we're like Cuban links. Okay, no more. No, nobody wearing
Speaker 1: a dukey fat rope chain. You're not scooping scrap from
Speaker 1: Big Dedy Kane group. You're not run D motherfucking m
Speaker 1: C the baggy pants if he was never I don't
Speaker 1: what the fund is your job? You? Like? I still
Speaker 1: real estate? Michael Blesing, Yeah, I haven't seen sell anything
Speaker 1: in the past since No, I saw I showed something
Speaker 1: like three months ago. That's a long time. Yeah. All
Speaker 1: you need is one hit wonder and then you're good
Speaker 1: for like a few months. And I do hard money loans, yeah,
Speaker 1: you know for flippers. Yeah, So how hard is that loan? Yeah?
Speaker 1: It's like eight ten percent interest, right, that's not that
Speaker 1: bad though. Yeah, a short term I'm saying. I mean, lord,
Speaker 1: I mean that's like my credits fucked up. So if
Speaker 1: I was to get a loan anyway, I'll be looking
Speaker 1: at twelve percent. I'm better off coming with you. Yeah,
Speaker 1: if you what is that called only for us quick flip? Yeah,
Speaker 1: short term, short term, short term. You don't do long terms,
Speaker 1: No I didn't. The most is one year. Yeah, that's
Speaker 1: the longest term. One year yea for those flippers. Yeah,
Speaker 1: because it's bank on stuff. If I brought a million dollars,
Speaker 1: if I don't have it back in a year, If
Speaker 1: I brought a million dollars, I don't get it back
Speaker 1: to you know year, What you guys gonna do to me? Yeah,
Speaker 1: we're gonna fe close in your house and we're gonna
Speaker 1: take one of your balls. Nothing big so when you
Speaker 1: should say a casting, I'm gonna leg you really mean that? Huh?
Speaker 1: No arm and the balls. No, we just we just
Speaker 1: extend you alone. We don't do anything tragic like that,
Speaker 1: or for clothes on your house. It's okay. Well, I
Speaker 1: know one person that probably hopefully will never need a
Speaker 1: loan any more, because hard working comedian just like myself.
Speaker 1: This guy has been doing his thing for as long
Speaker 1: as I have. In fact, we'll talk about it when
Speaker 1: he come on this podcast. He's probably the whitest black comedian. Really,
Speaker 1: I can't wait to meet your friends. Yeah, he's he's
Speaker 1: a black comedian. Really, I don't think any white person noticed. Niggah.
Speaker 1: He goes out in the street, black Pool, rushing and
Speaker 1: the white poole like, who the fun is that white
Speaker 1: guy that the black people are hugging? Gary only ladies
Speaker 1: and gentlemen. Here she comes mess America, Carolina, Kelly got
Speaker 1: a night, Kelly, come and show him to your ass.
Speaker 1: Look at that. It's real as matters. No no bb
Speaker 1: or nothing was transferred from like nothing you didn't transfer
Speaker 1: you're working a gaining weight first? That would is that
Speaker 1: what the women have to do? You have to gain
Speaker 1: weight to lose it. Well, why don't you just grow
Speaker 1: in the right spot? What do you do? Can you
Speaker 1: just direct that? Now? Look damn asked? Is this like
Speaker 1: an ass day kick? Can I say? Oh my goodness,
Speaker 1: kicking Mike? Today's storking Thursday. It's not sucking Thursdays. I
Speaker 1: told Mike he should have a white Wednesday. Yeah, nothing
Speaker 1: but white girls on Wednesday. That's right, you look good.
Speaker 1: Thanks for the Yeah, he can't say he's married, show
Speaker 1: him that ring. Let's say. That's like you can't even
Speaker 1: take your wife. Your wife don't let you do nothing
Speaker 1: at all, like she woulded to just bring home some
Speaker 1: pussy one day, just like, hey Gary, you know you've
Speaker 1: been a great guy. Here's some extra profools. Goodness, man,
Speaker 1: you see, here's the thing. Those contracts have to be
Speaker 1: done before marriage. You got married like hollow, you've been
Speaker 1: married eighteen Oh yeah, they weren't agreeing to these contracts
Speaker 1: back then. Thank you. This ship looks gonna talking about
Speaker 1: my career. Let's yeah, let's get I mean this podcast,
Speaker 1: we'll give a funk about careers. Were just more like
Speaker 1: into titties and asks, but I guess you. Wow, thanks
Speaker 1: for having me on Mike, you welcome, you know, I
Speaker 1: just I bring you here to get you in trouble,
Speaker 1: man that come here and get divorced a week later.
Speaker 1: So when just gonna air? Hopefully tomorrow. That's like when
Speaker 1: I got a week left? Oh man, But well, let's
Speaker 1: talk about some stand up We go back. I did
Speaker 1: his your podcast. I'm not sure you want to air whatever?
Speaker 1: When their March fourth, Mike, March for my Pike? Oka? Good?
Speaker 1: What am I watching? Are you watching? Point in the
Speaker 1: middle of the show. I don't know, Jesus Christ, I
Speaker 1: had no idea it was going this. It's this the
Speaker 1: first episode about to be the last. We keep this
Speaker 1: ship up. Oh it must be Gary Olwen's podcast. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I think it automatically leave it on the let to play.
Speaker 1: We just we just go sit out there, all right?
Speaker 1: So we go marry it. Teen years when you started
Speaker 1: stand up? What was that? First time I went on
Speaker 1: stage was five or ninety six? And then it went bad,
Speaker 1: So I didn't go up for another two years. Whoa,
Speaker 1: that's a long time, Gary, How bad was it? Two
Speaker 1: things happened. I was at the comedy store in Lahoya, California,
Speaker 1: in San Diego, and I thought the first night to
Speaker 1: open mic, I go, this is there the stars. But
Speaker 1: the first night open mic, so I thowt a star
Speaker 1: was born. This is it. I'm gonna get discovered, you know.
Speaker 1: Then I go up and there was probably ten people
Speaker 1: in the audience, but like twenty comics in the back,
Speaker 1: and the comics started heckling. They weren't heckling, they were
Speaker 1: doing the comic laugh, you know, to mean. So I
Speaker 1: remember I was nineteen nineteen or twenty nineteen. I was
Speaker 1: under twenty one. But I said, hey, all you comics
Speaker 1: in the back, go ahead, go ahead and keep heckling.
Speaker 1: I go, I'm not twenty one. I've been drinking in
Speaker 1: this club all night. Why don't call it cops and
Speaker 1: shut this motherfucker down. It was like the movie mis
Speaker 1: clicked off, the mic clicked off. Some guy can't even
Speaker 1: literally put me up by the back of my shirt
Speaker 1: and threw me out. And this guy, even Fred who
Speaker 1: had he wanted a hundred thousand dollars on America's Funniest People.
Speaker 1: He had like the crutches, but the thing abc funnest
Speaker 1: video people. I think it was the funniest people back then.
Speaker 1: But he wanted like ninety one. He was an older guy.
Speaker 1: He had the weird legs that you need the crutches
Speaker 1: to walk, and he was the manage GM of the club.
Speaker 1: I'm sure we keep on his crutches. And I'm on
Speaker 1: the ground. Hell don't have a comeback, and I go
Speaker 1: am I on A Farley Brother movie was going on.
Speaker 1: So it took me like a year to get the
Speaker 1: nerve to go back up because night, well, but you
Speaker 1: don't you don't know where to go up. So in
Speaker 1: my world living in San Diego, the only comedy club
Speaker 1: was the Jya Comedy Store using the service, so I
Speaker 1: was like, I didn't know where to go up. I
Speaker 1: just thought that was it. If I can't go up there,
Speaker 1: I don't know where else to go up. I think
Speaker 1: the Navy is like where this all the poor children
Speaker 1: always goes into service for some reason. I'd like, you
Speaker 1: don't have money for college? Would be real, you have
Speaker 1: no money for college, so either you're gonna work or
Speaker 1: go into the service. When I got to high school
Speaker 1: was broke. I try to go to Army, but I
Speaker 1: couldn't go because I didn't have a green card. I
Speaker 1: was legal to work and stay in America, but not legal.
Speaker 1: I was in a a permanent resident so they won't let
Speaker 1: me go in the army, so I had to keep working. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I got that. So you started that. That was nine
Speaker 1: was nice, twenty years old. And then it took a
Speaker 1: year and then uh, I started to ask around like
Speaker 1: some of the brothers that I was in the Navy with.
Speaker 1: I was like, yeo, I'm still want to do stand up, man,
Speaker 1: We're gonna go up, and they start, we're making me
Speaker 1: want to go up in the first place. If somebody
Speaker 1: like was it like A. I always wanted to be
Speaker 1: stand The whole goal and to join the Navy was
Speaker 1: They had a lot of bases in California. In my mind,
Speaker 1: the whole state was l A. I never really been
Speaker 1: so I'm thinking David Lee Ross video California Girls. I
Speaker 1: thought the whole state was like, I don't know, there
Speaker 1: was a friends know of Eureka, of Bakersfield. I thought
Speaker 1: the whole state was l A. So I got to
Speaker 1: San Diego. That's why I thought, oh, this is it.
Speaker 1: I just assumed Jim Carey Chris Rock was comp here.
Speaker 1: I thought this is the only comedy club in the
Speaker 1: state of California. I just didn't know. And then after
Speaker 1: a year I was telling some of the brothers I
Speaker 1: was in the Navy with usaid, man, I want to
Speaker 1: go up, man wouldn't be stand up. They told me
Speaker 1: all the quote unquote hood spots in San Diego. So
Speaker 1: that's why I started doing all the black rooms I
Speaker 1: could get on stage, and then I just kept getting better.
Speaker 1: Those white rules were so strict when I started opening,
Speaker 1: like the club man that just would pull you up
Speaker 1: according to where you're known in the club. So either
Speaker 1: you're gonna go up early or last. If you go
Speaker 1: up early, it's bailing nobody there. If you're going on last,
Speaker 1: comedians left. So as you build your portfolio, the more
Speaker 1: you get to know you, the better you got, the
Speaker 1: better spot you'll get. No, that was that was at
Speaker 1: the comedy works. You know that. I think there's one endeavor.
Speaker 1: There was a comedy works in Philly. Yeah, yeah, it was.
Speaker 1: It was it's not there anymore, but then that was
Speaker 1: Wednesday night and then Monday the laugh House had open mic.
Speaker 1: I found it out whiles, but open mic there was.
Speaker 1: Back then. It was called it funny. It was a
Speaker 1: funny bone. The Laft House wasn't funny. Bone. Originally it
Speaker 1: wasn't Funny Bone, so they had open mic on Mondays. Now,
Speaker 1: the difference with the open mic at the Funny Bone
Speaker 1: compared toive comedy works is Funny Bone first come, first served.
Speaker 1: I mean, if you get a line, if you're the
Speaker 1: first one in line, you get to pick the spot
Speaker 1: you get the goal. So spot one to twenty. If
Speaker 1: I'm like number one in line, I'll go pick like
Speaker 1: number eight. That's a good spot right in the middle
Speaker 1: of the show. Should be a nice crowd there. Everybody
Speaker 1: should be there the later you arrived. If the worst
Speaker 1: spot you get, I never heard of a comic club
Speaker 1: doing that. That's how I was back in. Would the
Speaker 1: line long lines you got on? Ye? I think they
Speaker 1: went up to like you know, and then after that
Speaker 1: there's a line of like a hundred people. What, No,
Speaker 1: it wasn't that many comics, not that many comics, and
Speaker 1: feeling it wasn't that many. Yet. It is not like
Speaker 1: some kind of competition like and you go to New York,
Speaker 1: like in the ABC competition where you have to stand
Speaker 1: in line and it's like a hundred people and you
Speaker 1: go in there audition for like one minute. You have
Speaker 1: to prove one a minute. Who the hell can prove
Speaker 1: themselves in one minute? But that's what happened when I
Speaker 1: started going up in l A. First time I went
Speaker 1: up in l A was a place called The Rage
Speaker 1: on Santa Monica. I didn't know it was a gay bar.
Speaker 1: So I got there, somebody put a dick in your mouth.
Speaker 1: Dick in my mouth. I'm sorry. No. So I'm calling
Speaker 1: l A like I'm making a little name for myself
Speaker 1: in San Diego. Right, I'm getting regular spots now, So
Speaker 1: I start calling something. I'm ready to go to l A.
Speaker 1: So I start calling every club. Obviously the comedy Store.
Speaker 1: They go, you gotta wait in line this night. Every
Speaker 1: club there's a long wait. I don't even say I
Speaker 1: can't go their weight. The Raid said, yeah, we have
Speaker 1: a talent show. No, we have a variety show every Tuesday.
Speaker 1: You get here at four, you sign up. If you
Speaker 1: make the show, you come back at nine to find
Speaker 1: out if you made the show. If you made the show,
Speaker 1: show starts ten. So I took a day off, drove
Speaker 1: up four o'clock. I signed up. Nobody's there. Nine o'clock.
Speaker 1: I came back. They said, you're on this show. You're
Speaker 1: the ninth to ten acts. I go awesome. Ten o'clock comes,
Speaker 1: the crowd started to come. I was like, there's a
Speaker 1: lot of dudes here. So everybody sang like it was
Speaker 1: eight singers. And then I go up, straight white male.
Speaker 1: It seemed like there was a thousands. There's all the
Speaker 1: gay dudes in the world that night, So I go up.
Speaker 1: I didn't get the first half of my joke out right.
Speaker 1: I got first. There was no entergy said that's gotta
Speaker 1: commit in. I got up there and all I heard
Speaker 1: was the energy left. I told like half a joke
Speaker 1: and I heard a one lonely boo and it was
Speaker 1: like and then it was like the whole crowd joined in.
Speaker 1: It was like boo. I was like, this, what the fun?
Speaker 1: I didn't get a joke out yet. I got booed
Speaker 1: and I got gone because the two guys came out
Speaker 1: with the pulp fiction ball thing. That two guys came
Speaker 1: out pulling a wagon and this guy was dressed in drag.
Speaker 1: He was like the he was heavy, he was like
Speaker 1: the big queen and he had the gong and they
Speaker 1: pulled him over to the gong and he was like
Speaker 1: and that's when they all went nuts. Yeah, I was like,
Speaker 1: what the fuck? So my dumb maass, being a never
Speaker 1: been l a comedian, I stay, I might make some
Speaker 1: context tonight. So I tell him boot I've been gone.
Speaker 1: I'm in the bathroom, right, I'm washing my hands. I
Speaker 1: put a dick in your up so I'm washing my hands.
Speaker 1: And this guy goes, hey, this isn't the right crowd
Speaker 1: for you, but if you need a massage, and he
Speaker 1: put his card in my pocket. I had a pocket
Speaker 1: of my shirt. I would have it was like nineties seven,
Speaker 1: like a like A had a shirt and it was
Speaker 1: one of them like just shirts, button down, short sleeve shirt,
Speaker 1: I don't know, and in front little thing. He just
Speaker 1: lets up in there, right, Mike, you have. But there
Speaker 1: was a girl there named Ded Rainbow, a comedian. Right.
Speaker 1: She came up to me after the show and she goes, hey,
Speaker 1: I only heard thirty seconds, but it seemed like your
Speaker 1: joke would have been funny if they would let you
Speaker 1: get it out. So she said, you can come to
Speaker 1: comedy store the belly room. This glad named Kathy Lewis
Speaker 1: does Monday nights there. But she charged you to go up.
Speaker 1: She charged you five dollars to get on her show,
Speaker 1: and in my world, I was like I was trying
Speaker 1: to get up in l A. So that was really
Speaker 1: where I got to going up in l A for
Speaker 1: the first time. And then I would drive back down
Speaker 1: to San Diego, and then I started to get regular spots.
Speaker 1: So I would get off work at four in the Navy,
Speaker 1: drive up to l A for maybe a night or
Speaker 1: tamp him spot at the Comedy Act Theater or Mavericks
Speaker 1: Flat or something like that, and then I drive back
Speaker 1: down at work. So you was forced into a black audience.
Speaker 1: It's not like that. It's not what you said. I'm
Speaker 1: you was like pushed into it. But it's where I
Speaker 1: could get stage time because I did stand outside the
Speaker 1: comedy story that the Sunday where all the comics that
Speaker 1: want to be paid regulars. I stood out there for
Speaker 1: three hours numerous times. Right, and I was in the Navy.
Speaker 1: So I'm living to see the go. I'm preparing myself
Speaker 1: to get out to make the move to l A.
Speaker 1: And I'll never forget. I wait in line, finally got
Speaker 1: on right, you're gonna showcase this day. Five people are showcases.
Speaker 1: It was four girls and me. I'll never forget it.
Speaker 1: And I was the fifth one out of the showcase.
Speaker 1: Hopefully you get to be a paid regular. And I
Speaker 1: got up there and Mitzi Shore had the four girls
Speaker 1: around her talking to them about their sets. She never
Speaker 1: watched my set, so I was like, and not to
Speaker 1: sound conceited, but I clearly had the best set out
Speaker 1: of the five people that night. She watches your set,
Speaker 1: and she's like the gate keeper. She decides if you're
Speaker 1: going to be a paid regular. So when I got up,
Speaker 1: you know, it's in the regular room, though it's not
Speaker 1: the big room. It was in the original room, not
Speaker 1: the main room. So I'm looking in the back and
Speaker 1: I could see her talking to the four girls. She's
Speaker 1: not watching my set. So then I called the next day,
Speaker 1: said yeah, you didn't make it, and I go, that's
Speaker 1: what I said. I did say, yeah, probably did have
Speaker 1: to hung up, but I was like, you didn't even watch,
Speaker 1: So I just went. I told myself I'll never go
Speaker 1: up in this fucking club as long as I live
Speaker 1: until Guy toris Fat Tuesday, which is the Urban night
Speaker 1: Black Night ended up me and Kenya, my wife, we
Speaker 1: end up taking it over from Guy Tory. Nobody knew
Speaker 1: it because guy was gonna let it go. He was
Speaker 1: getting too busy, and as you can't let it go, dude,
Speaker 1: that's like a staple. So I said, let me take
Speaker 1: it over. I won't change nothing. I didn't change the name,
Speaker 1: I didn't change security, I didn't change anything. Nobody knew
Speaker 1: we were running it for like two years. Who was
Speaker 1: hosting just different people? Yeah, like Dan and Green was hosting,
Speaker 1: and Earthquake was the host for a little while. George
Speaker 1: Wilmer's host a little while we were rotating home. So
Speaker 1: that had been like more like after like two thousand two.
Speaker 1: It was around two thousand stuff once, yeah, and then
Speaker 1: comments talk about man, I didn't even know it was
Speaker 1: getting back. What's up? But I sus this is African
Speaker 1: King of Comedy Michael Blacks. A question. Are you subscribe
Speaker 1: to my podcast No Filter with Michael Blacks? If not,
Speaker 1: you are missing out on the crazy interviews. They're exclusive
Speaker 1: behind the scenes content of my life and tons of
Speaker 1: stelet guess. So listen up, stop what you are doing
Speaker 1: right now and go find Little Filter. Michael Blacks. I
Speaker 1: found Radio Apple podcast all whereever you get your podcast,
Speaker 1: subscribe It's free, sup? Do it? And don't forget to
Speaker 1: check a new episode every Tuesday. That's what I almost
Speaker 1: got in a fight with Keith Class. Who is that
Speaker 1: he's playing for the Clippers like seven one? Remember Keith Class?
Speaker 1: Remember brother shut the fun joking? Ki and more Man
Speaker 1: go to this, So I just want to see your
Speaker 1: assid for remember going front? Yeah, more Man go to that.
Speaker 1: He Michael blocks and what is this call telling about
Speaker 1: the Comedy Store? You know? That's why I got my
Speaker 1: big break. Comedy Store got next Friday, right nay that
Speaker 1: night when they came to see my Gapps, they weren't
Speaker 1: there to see you. Yeah, I remember ice Cue came
Speaker 1: out to see Mike Gapps and I just happened to
Speaker 1: be performing that same night. But I didn't get the
Speaker 1: part from that. I still had the audition. It's not
Speaker 1: like nothing was hinted to me. So what happened was
Speaker 1: I performed and then I think ice Cube like what
Speaker 1: I did, So he called the Who's the Great? I
Speaker 1: was booking it at that time? UH was, oh my god?
Speaker 1: What was the guy's girl? Then that Stacy said whatever is?
Speaker 1: She hit up Guy Tory. She said, hey, guy, ice
Speaker 1: Cube didn't want Mike to go read for a production
Speaker 1: called Next Friday. I didn't think about it. I had
Speaker 1: no idea it was a sequel to Friday. Nobody I
Speaker 1: didn't know. I just saw like Next Friday. I don't
Speaker 1: know whether I thought that, man like I come and
Speaker 1: read this ship, not This Friday, but Next Friday. I
Speaker 1: had no clue what the it was. So I got it.
Speaker 1: I didn't know what the movie was about, like my
Speaker 1: mother Friday coming out. It's been like almost five years.
Speaker 1: I went on audition for I remember going to audition
Speaker 1: and from Kim Harden and Steve Carr, who was a
Speaker 1: director did for re. Steve was great, man, he still
Speaker 1: I mean, what is he doing that? I don't know.
Speaker 1: We did to did Daddy Daycare and we didn't ride along.
Speaker 1: Oh god damn it. It was Eddie Murphy. Mark Wilburg
Speaker 1: was there. Then that's when I realized, I've when you
Speaker 1: ever get a chance to do a big movie, you
Speaker 1: have to make that move to l A. Back in
Speaker 1: the nineties or two thousand, that's when you put to
Speaker 1: make that move. That's a mistake I made when I
Speaker 1: did Next Friday. I should have got on the next
Speaker 1: plane and came to l A for the Struggle Come
Speaker 1: to l A. I was already in the movie. I
Speaker 1: was hot at that moment. I did it because at
Speaker 1: that time I still had a two thousand. When the
Speaker 1: movie came out, I think I still had a beeper
Speaker 1: and a cell phone was not really cellphone was just
Speaker 1: coming out. But my BEPO is where I got most
Speaker 1: of my I missed a beep about it being in.
Speaker 1: Was it an animal movie or Eddie Murphy? Was it
Speaker 1: called on the one He's talking? Yes, part two? I
Speaker 1: think I missed out on the Steve car directed it
Speaker 1: was going to be an Animal he was gonna be
Speaker 1: the voice. Well, I missed out on it because I
Speaker 1: wasn't here and I got a really weird text like
Speaker 1: a week prior, And when I finally called that text back,
Speaker 1: it was about that movie and they already cast it.
Speaker 1: I was so pissed missed out. But you know what,
Speaker 1: you never question what happens. Everything happens for a reason. Absolutely.
Speaker 1: Let's talk about guys who blew up years in our
Speaker 1: area that are not doing absolutely nothing right now, you know, Like,
Speaker 1: but that's the problem with comedians. We get so focused
Speaker 1: on the top dogs. We don't focus on how lucky.
Speaker 1: We already be worried. But you gotta realize there's a
Speaker 1: hundred guys that would die because you know, like ur r,
Speaker 1: let's say fraternity of Well, if you look at like
Speaker 1: when people come to l A and start making a name,
Speaker 1: ours was probably like the two era. That's when it
Speaker 1: was Epps was open mic, and Cab was open mic,
Speaker 1: and Cat was open mic. And when you go to
Speaker 1: the comedy store or or the improv or the laugh factory,
Speaker 1: you got your black nights and you'd see the same
Speaker 1: rotation people and we all knew like we was like
Speaker 1: oh and then somebody would get a movie or somebody
Speaker 1: get this and then but that era was there. But
Speaker 1: those are like five names, right, d Ray bu keV Cat, Mike.
Speaker 1: There's a hundred guys that were out there that I
Speaker 1: don't know where the're at. They were they was there
Speaker 1: with us grinding, but I don't know what happened to him.
Speaker 1: And we so we get those guys that those guys
Speaker 1: called us for work. Now they're like, yo, can I
Speaker 1: go to row with you? I'm like you this person,
Speaker 1: I mean, I'm not gonna mention any names mentioned. It
Speaker 1: might get okay, No, one's gonna listen to the podcasts
Speaker 1: like it's crazy. How like just they's just changed. Man,
Speaker 1: how life we just big a turn. You know, those
Speaker 1: who are hot are like nah hot, and but it's busy.
Speaker 1: You have to just find a way to just keep
Speaker 1: yourself relevant. Like that's the key. Because what I did
Speaker 1: back it like from ninety eight all the way to
Speaker 1: like two thousand six, I said to myself, I have
Speaker 1: to get on TV at least once a year. I
Speaker 1: gotta stay out there. That's where I did coming for
Speaker 1: you almost every year from ninety eight to like two
Speaker 1: thousand and I guess when it was tapping me a
Speaker 1: hot two thousand and six, and then I knew I
Speaker 1: kind of like got cold between like oh, seven oh eight.
Speaker 1: I even made a move to l a one time
Speaker 1: like back and like oh it's five oh six. But
Speaker 1: about there, but bus was done. I wasn't buzzing anymore.
Speaker 1: And when I came here, when I wasn't buzzing. Hollywood,
Speaker 1: if you're not buzzing, man, don't come because they show
Speaker 1: you no love. You go to the club, they want
Speaker 1: to pull you on early or do first impression to
Speaker 1: treat you like ship. Yeah. So I went back home
Speaker 1: here for like two years, nothing was happening. I went
Speaker 1: back to Philly and I was like, you know, I'm
Speaker 1: not coming back to Hollywood unless somebody's right in me here. Check.
Speaker 1: So then I went. And then right after I went back,
Speaker 1: I went back to build the house and all of
Speaker 1: that stuff. And then a couple of years later, this
Speaker 1: think called Twitter came out, and then after Twitter to
Speaker 1: Instagram and I just made a presence on social media.
Speaker 1: And when I did, somebody hit me about doing some
Speaker 1: kind of radio show out hit, like an online show.
Speaker 1: So I came. I said, I'm not coming without unless
Speaker 1: Moody's paying me. So I came out and this guy
Speaker 1: doing the studio for us to do like a online
Speaker 1: show and paying us every month while they're building the studio.
Speaker 1: We're just rehearsaling. Is his name is Steve Harvey. No,
Speaker 1: and it should never happened. It never happened, but I
Speaker 1: got paid while in the process of it. And then
Speaker 1: right as I said's gon happen, I was I was
Speaker 1: thinking about leaving, but I was like, I saw in
Speaker 1: a year Lys and then we end up doing Living
Speaker 1: with Funny. You're supposed to do Living with Funny with Us,
Speaker 1: but then you you didn't because you went to your
Speaker 1: own show, Muddling with Funny, the reality show. The reality Yeah,
Speaker 1: oh boy was hot? Was that what Plumer? Yeah? Oh
Speaker 1: he was hot. Here's what happened. I committed to the show.
Speaker 1: But then I got a a huge deal for my
Speaker 1: own reality show and they're calling it the Gary Owen
Speaker 1: Show and let me literally trying to convince me not
Speaker 1: to do it. I go, so hold on. And then
Speaker 1: when I I'm producing, creating and I'm starting right, so
Speaker 1: I'm like, let me, they would have to do ten
Speaker 1: seasons of your show to make when I make it,
Speaker 1: him one season because I'm getting three checks off of right.
Speaker 1: But he literally tried to remember he was at the
Speaker 1: Coffee Bean, like in Cent and in Culver City and
Speaker 1: we met. I God bless him for the effort, but
Speaker 1: I was like, dude, at some point, you just gonna
Speaker 1: be like yeah, because I'm trying to tell him like this,
Speaker 1: if the shoe was on the other foot, I would
Speaker 1: expect you to drop the show we're doing and move
Speaker 1: on if that's the case. I was like this, but
Speaker 1: I mean, we're cool and everything. But he was really
Speaker 1: like trying to this show. This is the show. I
Speaker 1: was like Gary, Mike's friends. You got there. I didn't
Speaker 1: say anything bad about it. Oh yeah, it was really
Speaker 1: trying to Like I said, God, bless the effort of
Speaker 1: trying to convince me. You know what I mean. You
Speaker 1: would have did it. You would have stayed living with
Speaker 1: the funny. He would have convinced you for sure. Oh
Speaker 1: my god. You would have been like, yeah, that's a
Speaker 1: good move. That's why. That's why he will probably hire
Speaker 1: me as this plumber. Why you why why every time
Speaker 1: you talk? You talk way into the mic. If we
Speaker 1: pick up your voice, fire every time you talk. You
Speaker 1: to this. He wouldn't do that to me. I would
Speaker 1: never say that to him. I got a whiplash from
Speaker 1: Michael's waiters. Got a whiplash. Any of your twork at all?
Speaker 1: Kate work. Mike doesn't even know how to spell. What
Speaker 1: is h a d O? Yeah he got it is
Speaker 1: a d N? You said, machata, Oh with a T.
Speaker 1: What's whatever? What's fine, that's fine, it's called Oh Mike
Speaker 1: knows how to do that dance dance Mike, Gary Gary
Speaker 1: Ohen used to live next to Tijuana. Yeah, it's like
Speaker 1: five blocks Yeah, go San Diego. My uncle was in
Speaker 1: the navy. What about Tiajuana. I haven't been at the Wanta.
Speaker 1: I heard the kidnap Asian people there sometimes stay away.
Speaker 1: You should go. My brother went there. Yeah, I won't
Speaker 1: be back. Don't even realize when he no, no, no,
Speaker 1: I'll get kid that. Yeah. Yeah, that's how you should go.
Speaker 1: Maybe one day I go with you. Have you been
Speaker 1: to Djuana? Gary, Yeah, I was in the Navy. When
Speaker 1: you're in the Navy and you're not twenty one and saying,
Speaker 1: but you can go Tijuana? How far is the drive?
Speaker 1: You don't drive? You walk? Is that you can Mexico
Speaker 1: and you park on the American side, the same Egger
Speaker 1: side and you you don't never drive Intijuana and you
Speaker 1: just cross the border walking and there's bars all around there. Hey, Gary,
Speaker 1: I here for pussy? Is that true? I don't know.
Speaker 1: You didn't bind none. No, I'm not hello, wanna pussy crazy?
Speaker 1: You didn't get any Coronita conas Corona. Coronitas is a
Speaker 1: little tiny corona. There's a big corol Coronitas Coronita. No
Speaker 1: is it a beer y beards corona? Just a Meani vision.
Speaker 1: That's where all my fat co workers used to go
Speaker 1: to get some pussy in Tijuana. Any of them alive
Speaker 1: right now? No, I don't know. They might have got Corona.
Speaker 1: They're fat, They're still like maybe I don't work for
Speaker 1: the no more so you drive a submarine all the time.
Speaker 1: I was never on a submarine your Navy. Yeah, on
Speaker 1: a submarine ship. Oh, ship above the water. But you
Speaker 1: know I've been on the submarine. No. I mean I've
Speaker 1: been on the tour room. But I ain't. We never
Speaker 1: went once. You're doing that. You are you going to war?
Speaker 1: If you ever went to war? No? What was the
Speaker 1: war during your time? Remember Vietnam was in between? It
Speaker 1: was it was after what was the war? Vietnam War?
Speaker 1: I was after Desert Storm, but before the nine eleven.
Speaker 1: So I was right in the middle. I was perfect.
Speaker 1: Nothing was popping off, coasting. Yeah, what you was after?
Speaker 1: She has a question for you. She's from Dominican Public Gary.
Speaker 1: So what was the longest that you were under the water.
Speaker 1: I wasn't under the water. I wasn't on the submarine.
Speaker 1: It's not say no, it's not to the submarine. Was
Speaker 1: not on the submarine United States? Isn't me or you crisy.
Speaker 1: I wasn't on a submar It was never underwater. Oh okay.
Speaker 1: I was gonna ask you, like, what are you guys
Speaker 1: doing when you get horny and you under the water
Speaker 1: when you're on the ship. No, even when you're on
Speaker 1: the ship. There was one ship and they had a
Speaker 1: pocket pussy and it was getting passed around and like
Speaker 1: eight guys got crabs pocket pussy. Tell me, tell me
Speaker 1: more about the pocket pussy. I don't know where it was.
Speaker 1: I didn't see it, you sure, Gary, but it looked
Speaker 1: like I guess it was like guilty. I guess it's
Speaker 1: like one of those plastic dolls. It was a fake pussy,
Speaker 1: the fake pussy and you get your jack off to
Speaker 1: it like real pussy picking. You have any questions about
Speaker 1: the plastic pussy or he must have used it if
Speaker 1: he didn't get no hookers in Tijuana, right, if he
Speaker 1: had to use another option. I was never on a
Speaker 1: ship like that. With the ship she's talking about, if
Speaker 1: you're underway for like six months and it's we never
Speaker 1: left for more than a week. Navy girls, Okay, so
Speaker 1: I was a cop and I was a Navy. I
Speaker 1: did catch an orgy on the ship one night full
Speaker 1: on because I would like working nights, so I would
Speaker 1: work six pm to six am. There's not there's not
Speaker 1: a lot of traffic, right, there's not a lot of
Speaker 1: You kind of can do what you want. So there's
Speaker 1: this place called the riggers loft on the ship. It's
Speaker 1: where a lot of the ropes are held, you know
Speaker 1: what I mean, and rig my fault. It's a lot
Speaker 1: of synthetic material in there. You're gonna lose two black fans. Uh.
Speaker 1: It's always at the wrong moment. He's left it setups.
Speaker 1: Hey do you hear about the I didn't get through
Speaker 1: the joke yet. Gary. My earphone is a little delayed.
Speaker 1: They didn't clean my ears today. Oh they'll tell Gary
Speaker 1: don't ever bring me back with him on the show. No.
Speaker 1: So the place is called the rivers loft. So I'm
Speaker 1: not an expert, but the Navy ships, the walls, a
Speaker 1: lot of them had these little tiny holes about that big,
Speaker 1: and I guess it's for the bend with the meadow
Speaker 1: and the ship. You know my bend a little bit.
Speaker 1: So give so you walk around the ship at night,
Speaker 1: you're on patrol. I don't expect to walk in on
Speaker 1: this right, So I put my eye against this hole. Right.
Speaker 1: This is no, no, this is like So I got
Speaker 1: my eye against the hole. So this guy, I see
Speaker 1: him staying there and I'm going, what's he doing? Right?
Speaker 1: And then this girl's hand came around the back of
Speaker 1: his back and I go, oh, she's sucking him off, right,
Speaker 1: she sucking his dick? So I don't see I see
Speaker 1: the hand right there? Go is he getting sucked off?
Speaker 1: So every do or the ship? I have a key to, right,
Speaker 1: so I'm real quiet. I like to turn the key,
Speaker 1: and I kicked open the door. The door opened and
Speaker 1: shut the door they were in, so my door. Now
Speaker 1: they're in this other office. They was in this office
Speaker 1: on boom boom, But there was four other couples going
Speaker 1: at it. So it wasn't like an or is he
Speaker 1: like eight people together? It was like four different couples
Speaker 1: all going at it. Right. So now I'm doing this
Speaker 1: What the what? No, I'm going again, let me finish
Speaker 1: the story. Thanks for interrupting. So anyway, so I was
Speaker 1: going like this, what the funk? Right, and everybody stands
Speaker 1: up going what the funk? So now you got these
Speaker 1: four dudes and the four girls. We're all sitting there
Speaker 1: freaking out. They're freaking because I think they're in trouble.
Speaker 1: I'm freaking out because I don't know what to do now, right,
Speaker 1: So I just told everybody, said, all right, everybody put
Speaker 1: your clothes on. Girls right here, guys here, some skin
Speaker 1: are going okay, do I want to really fuck their
Speaker 1: lives up? Like they'll get on restriction, to lose money,
Speaker 1: to lose ray. And I was like, all right, guys,
Speaker 1: take off. If you get a phone call in the morning,
Speaker 1: you know what it's for. So all the guys left.
Speaker 1: So now the four girls looking at me, and I
Speaker 1: just went all right. I waited like five minutes and
Speaker 1: like the guys back in the barracks and in the
Speaker 1: birthing area. All right, girls, you go back, and I
Speaker 1: walked him back to female birthing. But I'm walking them
Speaker 1: back and back in my mind like probably, but I'm
Speaker 1: not done anyways. So anyways, I walked him back to
Speaker 1: the berthing the original couple, right, I still haven't seen them, right,
Speaker 1: I don't realize my door had shut third door, right,
Speaker 1: So that's when I realized, like, wait a minute, I
Speaker 1: didn't see the original two. So after I walked the
Speaker 1: girls are walking back. I opened up the doors we
Speaker 1: left and I went and I forget about you two
Speaker 1: motherfucker is he either? And they're both staying there like this.
Speaker 1: So I decided I'm not gonna turn in by in right.
Speaker 1: Nobody saw me that. I didn't want to snitch, and
Speaker 1: I know how navy is. Some of might have had
Speaker 1: girlfriends wives. I didn't want to suck their lives up, right.
Speaker 1: So when we got back into port, I go one
Speaker 1: of the girls. I was walking off the ship going
Speaker 1: to our cars. She just was walking. Next she goes,
Speaker 1: you're real cool, Owen, You're real cool. I was like,
Speaker 1: I know, I know. And then one, dude, I keep
Speaker 1: you not every time I'm at a bar and seeing
Speaker 1: Digo for the next like one or two years, I'd
Speaker 1: be getting drinks into me and I'm going, can't find
Speaker 1: me a drink. It's just one guy that was in
Speaker 1: the riggers loft and I told him, I said, dude,
Speaker 1: I can't turn you in anymore. You're fine. No, you
Speaker 1: don't understand. You could have fucked my life up, bro,
Speaker 1: So you can't bind me. Every time I saw him, Wow,
Speaker 1: that's nice, he'll be like, okay, guys, you are girls.
Speaker 1: One to three infections for everybody, get this black infecion
Speaker 1: or you're gonna get terminated. I would have got the
Speaker 1: first me two cases. Goddamn, that was a great story.
Speaker 1: Mr Rowan, Yeah, it wasn't interrupted. Tell us the time
Speaker 1: you met Dave Chappille. That was really funny. What Dave
Speaker 1: Schappelle invited YouTube He's party. Yeah, that was really fun
Speaker 1: Dave Chappelle's wife on the toilet. Oh yeah, well I
Speaker 1: did Chappell's summer camp this summer. And you know, Dave's
Speaker 1: got the little nightclub and Yellow Spree. He's got this
Speaker 1: nightclub that sits on the side of a road and
Speaker 1: you don't know it's a nightclub. I told Mike, it
Speaker 1: looks like one of those buildings that when the power
Speaker 1: goes out, you go to that building to flip the
Speaker 1: power switch on or something. It's like a little brick building,
Speaker 1: doesn't look like nothing. But if you go inside, it's
Speaker 1: just jumping nightclub that Dave has. It's not a nightclub because, yeah,
Speaker 1: you can't just go in there. Yeah yeah, you definitely
Speaker 1: nobody will ever invite definitely not going. So anyways, I
Speaker 1: go there and we're partying, and they got a bathroom.
Speaker 1: They got a lock on it, opened the door and
Speaker 1: there's Dave's wife on the toilet, and I went, so
Speaker 1: now I'm like, oh ship. And then she she's on
Speaker 1: her way up, she's done. She sits back. Then she goes,
Speaker 1: oh God, and I go, oh ship. But I don't
Speaker 1: fucking leave stim there going oh ship. I don't know
Speaker 1: go and she like doesn't know stand up or go down.
Speaker 1: So she went up down like three times. And I
Speaker 1: came back and I go, ah, funk, man. So I
Speaker 1: just walked right of a day. Go Dave, I just
Speaker 1: walked in on your wife taking a piss. Man, I go, dude,
Speaker 1: if if you want me to call my wife, I'll
Speaker 1: fly her out here and you can watch her to
Speaker 1: take a piss. I don't want to be weird. So
Speaker 1: did you do it? Did you flay your Wife's? Cool? Bro? Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's cool. Next time, No, man, it's fine, Yeah, I'll
Speaker 1: be I don't know how he feels. How how do
Speaker 1: you think he really felt about that? What probably will embarrassing? Dot?
Speaker 1: No if it's not a big deal. I mean, you're
Speaker 1: walking on somebody taking a piss. That's not a big deal,
Speaker 1: matter a fact, no joke, Mike, I just walk into
Speaker 1: your friend. What's his name, Stevie Muckey. What's his name,
Speaker 1: Charlie Mack. Yeah, he was taking a piece and didn't
Speaker 1: locked the I swear to you, has never happened to
Speaker 1: me in my life until this mother suckers told us
Speaker 1: about the story. I walk on him over there taking
Speaker 1: a piece. He saw his cat. No, I didn't say.
Speaker 1: I didn't say a good look up. Sorry. I thought
Speaker 1: it was gonna get punched. I was like locked the door.
Speaker 1: But yeah, that's the first time I ever walked up.
Speaker 1: That's crazy, ain't it. You told us about the story,
Speaker 1: and then I walked into his friend taking a piece.
Speaker 1: It's a really big guy too. He saw David's wife's Yeah, couci,
Speaker 1: probably you didn't look. Yeah, like when I opened and
Speaker 1: luckily didn't see Childie's dick that he probably saw it.
Speaker 1: He doesn't want to say nothing, say yeah, he's wearing
Speaker 1: all dark clothes. I don't know. I just got out. Sorry, Mike,
Speaker 1: you gotta put a lock on your toilet. Who doesn't
Speaker 1: have luck under toilet? Yeah? Where'd you guys meet? Yeah,
Speaker 1: it was an accident. Special Olympics. Yeah, he was round
Speaker 1: the hundred Mike. You know, yeah, there was a there
Speaker 1: was a house for sale read here next door. And
Speaker 1: then I was helping sell the hotel side. My friend
Speaker 1: is an agent to sell the hotel side for like
Speaker 1: three million. That was like somebody invited me to have
Speaker 1: some drinks next door and then I walk in. I
Speaker 1: was like, oh, they got really good cookies. And then Mike,
Speaker 1: Mike just bought this panhouse. He was the only one
Speaker 1: to live here. That's the only one that's floor at
Speaker 1: that time. Yeah, and then he goes, hey, how are
Speaker 1: you doing. You live in the area. It was like, yeah,
Speaker 1: I live around the area. He goes, my name is
Speaker 1: Michael Black sog Hey, my name is Christian. I used
Speaker 1: to have a name. Gary. Did you believe that I?
Speaker 1: Me and Mike we're the only This is the longest
Speaker 1: fucking story about how you meet somebody like this. You
Speaker 1: know where you met here? That's the whole story where
Speaker 1: you guys me here here Gary, like we met like
Speaker 1: they used to throw parties for us, like the whole building.
Speaker 1: They'll throw parties in one of the houses that was empty.
Speaker 1: This is the new floor that added this floor, Like
Speaker 1: three years ago. So all this stuff was for sales.
Speaker 1: So they will pick like one of the units that
Speaker 1: have a party. So they want all the tenants to
Speaker 1: kind of look at it. You can't mighty want to
Speaker 1: buy it. But she was ridiculous. Yeah, he was doing this,
Speaker 1: so stupid one to buy one that time. I was
Speaker 1: the first one to buy it. Yeah, he thought I
Speaker 1: got a good deal. In what comes with that valet pocket?
Speaker 1: No blue job. Let me let me ask you this.
Speaker 1: If it's valid. If it's valet and you pay twenty,
Speaker 1: I don't pay h the many Valley minute going to
Speaker 1: take my car and put him out. I have pocket spots.
Speaker 1: I have three spots, right, so they just put the
Speaker 1: But that's part of your h o A fees, right, Okay,
Speaker 1: So why the funk they charged me to park today?
Speaker 1: I said, Michael Blackson. They said, yeah, fifteen dollars. I go. No, No,
Speaker 1: I'm here to work on his podcast. You know you
Speaker 1: just say charge Michael black They said all his spots
Speaker 1: are filled. Yeahs filled him because Carolina, I have to
Speaker 1: come early and clean and get everything ready. Well this
Speaker 1: is great. I really gotta came on the podcast and
Speaker 1: lost money. No, they're going to just put on my account. Yeah, yeah, Gary,
Speaker 1: he's rich. You know. He made it into this movie
Speaker 1: called Coming to America. They give him DVD Come to
Speaker 1: America Too, And can we talk about it? I'll talk
Speaker 1: about I had parking reserve for Michael Blackson and he
Speaker 1: came to my podcast. Really what was crashed into the
Speaker 1: fucking pocket spot? His podcast is done at a fucking garage,
Speaker 1: the studio Okay, twisted home. It's a studio with a
Speaker 1: garage doge door. Yeah, you're right, but it's a studio, Mike,
Speaker 1: that's out of Monica. Money on the rent park that's
Speaker 1: a lot of money. That's a lot of parking. Gary. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you must have a lot of guests guests. Yeah, you're right,
Speaker 1: but it was only us. No, no, there was other people.
Speaker 1: We got editors. Oh, it's called staff, the whole crew.
Speaker 1: Know what you want to talk about? Can we talk
Speaker 1: about Coming to America too? Yeah? There, the talk about
Speaker 1: Gary is my guest. We're not talking about Gary. Asking
Speaker 1: what Gary has coming up? Yeah, I'm gonna no, No,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna I'm gonna go see Coming to America Too.
Speaker 1: That's what I got coming up. I can't wait. But
Speaker 1: I really can't wait to see the movie because if
Speaker 1: you saw Come to America the one, you gotta see
Speaker 1: the second one. And there's no way it's gonna be
Speaker 1: as good. We all know that, but I still want
Speaker 1: to see it. But there's just no way it's gonna
Speaker 1: be as good as the first day. It's like Blair
Speaker 1: Witch Project. You have to see that, that Blair Bitch Project.
Speaker 1: You know, the Blair Witch Project. And then they got
Speaker 1: the porn version of Blair Bitch Project. I'm just joking
Speaker 1: with you. We didn't know. Let's try to take up
Speaker 1: a great movie that it made a sequel for that
Speaker 1: was better than the original, all close to it. Let
Speaker 1: me see, I think like a man, he Mike, Hey, Mike,
Speaker 1: why don't you and Gary make a movie together? That
Speaker 1: would be so funny? Black It was me the we
Speaker 1: did do a movie part and part Part two is
Speaker 1: gonna better Part one? And that's the movie is gonna
Speaker 1: better Part one. First of all, part one. Nobody asked
Speaker 1: for part two. I'm like, why to me was so bad? Like,
Speaker 1: now have this? How about I died in the first
Speaker 1: one and I'm in the second one playing hold on,
Speaker 1: playing a different motherfucker. That's not and nobody brings up
Speaker 1: each your mother shot in the first one, that's literally
Speaker 1: doing boys in the hood too, and have a more chests,
Speaker 1: says just walk around the background like Ricky, Now my
Speaker 1: name is Steve, who's just Ricky? Motherfucker. That's a great idea.
Speaker 1: Did you day? And the first one I died? I
Speaker 1: got shot? And then did you make it to the signal?
Speaker 1: I'm in the second one? How you got a life again?
Speaker 1: In the second one playing a different person. People look
Speaker 1: alike came Badge died in the first one too, and
Speaker 1: he's in the second one. It's the phone call I
Speaker 1: got from the Mike Dean so positive. Deon Taylor. He's
Speaker 1: a director. He's a director. He's like, yo, yo, gee,
Speaker 1: got good news, baby, we got picked up the sequel,
Speaker 1: I go, that's great, But didn't I die in the
Speaker 1: first one that he goes, yeah, we ain't. Were about
Speaker 1: that ship by hey else and we're bringing you back
Speaker 1: bigger and better than the first one. They asked the
Speaker 1: ultimate positive reinforcement. He and Dan was here. He would
Speaker 1: make you feel like you're making sense like everything you said,
Speaker 1: because I get that. Blair bitch, Blair bitch Yeah, Blair
Speaker 1: Bitch is better than Blair Witch. He wouldn't make me
Speaker 1: feel like a red like Gary O windows to me joking. Thanks,
Speaker 1: everybody's get you shrinks from being with the chicks. I
Speaker 1: got the Dude podcast. It's amazing. Yeah, give him more's
Speaker 1: going to ship. Hey you mother suckers listening to Don't
Speaker 1: Filter with Michael Blackson. Thank you for tun to in.
Speaker 1: Be sure to subscribe, great comment and share wherever you
Speaker 1: listen to podcasts when you're planning to have they with
Speaker 1: Gary Owen in there three, I mean to thank you.
Speaker 1: We'll do something else. I wrote this movie. I want
Speaker 1: to talk about it because I don't post to the
Speaker 1: idea bad apartment for Gary, so we could gonna make
Speaker 1: something happen. It's fucking dogs. Get your dogs, republics two dogs. Well,
Speaker 1: his neighbor got a dog, but it feels like it's
Speaker 1: his because the way they worked, and it was like,
Speaker 1: I never set how people live in high rises and
Speaker 1: have dogs. I have got to take him down. Take
Speaker 1: a ship there, we have a dog. Okay, Still to
Speaker 1: get on the elevator with a dog at a house,
Speaker 1: I get it. Just take in the backyards and I
Speaker 1: can't know, any must man, you have to take care
Speaker 1: of them like sucking human being, like babies a little
Speaker 1: ship feed m yeah said that time cluck, yeah, seven am.
Speaker 1: But you got a whole family though, it's not like
Speaker 1: you're not damn kids are like I'm just me. If
Speaker 1: if I left that dog, I come to them up
Speaker 1: and be dead. Yeah, Mike, you can't even take care
Speaker 1: of your plants outside. You water once a year? You
Speaker 1: do having water in three years? Yeah, you can't have
Speaker 1: a fake. No, it's real plants. It's from Nigeria, I
Speaker 1: mean in Africa, from Africa. Those are those plants. The
Speaker 1: only water once a year. It came from a small
Speaker 1: you know, I know, I googled before I water and
Speaker 1: you got mad, like fucking neighbor downstairs and pour the
Speaker 1: water on the balcony and then you're gonna went into
Speaker 1: the call me like it's sucking raining out of your unit. Mike. Yeah. No,
Speaker 1: they just piste off all the time. They don't like him.
Speaker 1: That my neighbors, the h A Department don't like him.
Speaker 1: One time he had a working party at the jacuzzi.
Speaker 1: They gave him a ticket. They said, we want you
Speaker 1: to be in the meeting. You can have more than
Speaker 1: six people. I can't on the four, but this I
Speaker 1: had six and I'm black. I have six people. But
Speaker 1: I guess where they found that video. When the fucking
Speaker 1: working Thursday, they based on his violations on his Instagram.
Speaker 1: But when people do that, they tell on themselves a
Speaker 1: little very less than you're torking Thursdays. When we had
Speaker 1: the reality show, we went to a university. We wanted
Speaker 1: to use their track and for one of the episodes,
Speaker 1: and the lady at the Universe is like, no, I
Speaker 1: know how your reality shows are, and I go, all
Speaker 1: reality shows aren't like loving hip hop? You know what
Speaker 1: I mean? You're telling on yourself right now. That's the
Speaker 1: ship you watch, you know what I mean? Hey, what's
Speaker 1: your reality show? Gary's? It's funny as Ship? Because I
Speaker 1: created it. It reminds me of that my favorite movie.
Speaker 1: It's called Me Myself and Irene. Why because it's Jim Carrey. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I can see that. Yeah. The first thing we agree
Speaker 1: upon this whole. I like that one. It's funny as ship.
Speaker 1: Believe you've got your your son to cut his here
Speaker 1: he's got a little bit still long. No, he got dreads.
Speaker 1: So they go down like blow his waist. Yeah, longer
Speaker 1: than us here, it's like ten years he's been growing up.
Speaker 1: He's still going dreads are locks. I don't know. Sometimes
Speaker 1: say it, motherfucker's get mad. It's locks locks long as ship.
Speaker 1: So we're getting some money to cut a little bit.
Speaker 1: He did. He cut it a little bit. Gary cut
Speaker 1: it on the show, so that, Yeah, it's reality TV.
Speaker 1: It's all real. We did a lot of a lot
Speaker 1: of big tours together, but the biggest it was the
Speaker 1: Shock the Shock Tour, right, yeah, yeah, shall start so
Speaker 1: you host, you host the Orlando right yeah, remember that
Speaker 1: I wasn't on the show. A Jay Farrow component, Tony
Speaker 1: Roberts was on that. Yeah that I was there. I
Speaker 1: did to watch it. I did the Shock to our.
Speaker 1: I did it in Dallas. It's like when I didn't.
Speaker 1: Dallar was like when the first time it's snowed and
Speaker 1: they didn't think that everybody would make it. So remember
Speaker 1: they had like Damon Williams as a backup just in
Speaker 1: case people don't make it. Because the snow in Dallars
Speaker 1: for the first time, they still put up no, you
Speaker 1: didn't know it was it was well me Monique Corey Hoaklan.
Speaker 1: Mike Epps did it too, but Mike had a special
Speaker 1: coming out, so they call Mikes. He did the live show,
Speaker 1: but it dded him out of the out of the taping.
Speaker 1: That's fine. I was still the rest like this. Sorry, Gary,
Speaker 1: your podcast have high budget. This minimum. We only have
Speaker 1: one sponsor right now, state Form. Well here you have
Speaker 1: a choice. You to have a nice equipment as and titties.
Speaker 1: I just got all nice equipment. Speaking of us and titties,
Speaker 1: what are you? Gary? Are you alas guy as like Michael? Yeah? Great,
Speaker 1: don't get a twisted Yeah, both have nice Are you
Speaker 1: like a thirty four triple D D? Whoa, Mike, this
Speaker 1: is really good. He missed it for one, but yeah,
Speaker 1: I could be four and then she's thirty for I
Speaker 1: have no bra. I don't know if you're wearing the bram.
Speaker 1: But Mike, that's Kim Kardashian. You know him, you know her,
Speaker 1: you know her, just Callye his wife. Yeah, now can
Speaker 1: you tell us how you left Canye? You got tired
Speaker 1: of his ass running for president. It's not even qualified
Speaker 1: to run for fucking mayor Calabasas. Gary, You you why
Speaker 1: do you always talk like you're thinking and you forget
Speaker 1: what you're gonna say. You're literally like, you're like, this
Speaker 1: is Mike, this is him. Hey, look guys, there's a
Speaker 1: naked girl. Never mind, she's already gone. I don't know,
Speaker 1: you're growing on me. Bro Gary's funny. Hey do you
Speaker 1: know notice into you didn't do the dates right? So?
Speaker 1: What I like Mike ass back on TOURK What I
Speaker 1: like that Mike is doing. Mike is making life very easy.
Speaker 1: And I didn't realize that to today when I looked
Speaker 1: at that program for the show this weekend. Mike is
Speaker 1: hosting the tour, his tour, and he's the headlining anymore. Oh,
Speaker 1: you're talking about the one in Tampa for but we
Speaker 1: have more on that, are you headline? I've just found
Speaker 1: it out today is that Brian Alden is So Mike's
Speaker 1: going to host. So what's the lineup. He's got Carlos Miller,
Speaker 1: Country Way, DC, Young Fly, and then I Clothes. All right,
Speaker 1: that's a really dark show. That is dark Well Mike Mike,
Speaker 1: that's why, Well, that's why Mike is in between. It
Speaker 1: just gets darker as the show goes. It's funny. I'm
Speaker 1: gonna say that don't sound like the later I got
Speaker 1: the dark I said, after me, he's gonna be done.
Speaker 1: Cheated after him is a con? What's up? We go
Speaker 1: Gary to start the show with you facts? Wow, where'd
Speaker 1: you come up with that one? That? That was the
Speaker 1: easiest joke in the night? Gary, you go first? My goodness?
Speaker 1: Two shows? Right? Yeah? Yeah? How's that working? Is the
Speaker 1: theater half capacity? I have no idea, Man, Florida. I
Speaker 1: think it's there's no rules there now, Mike rules. I mean,
Speaker 1: if the theater holds three thousand one night, he's bigger.
Speaker 1: It got, it's bigger than that. It's probably, like I'm
Speaker 1: just giving an example. Is it gonna be fifty hire
Speaker 1: people or two? I think I think that there might
Speaker 1: be a seventy five. I'm just glad to do on
Speaker 1: a theater show again. Yeah, I mean, and I'm glad
Speaker 1: it's breaking the ice, is opening the door for other ones.
Speaker 1: Go ahead and do it until there's an operating Yeah, Mike,
Speaker 1: they call it. They called the super Bowl, the Super
Speaker 1: spread super Bowl. That's what this show come on. That
Speaker 1: ship would be all done with, motherfucker. So we don't
Speaker 1: care about We give you measures right here, you're gonna
Speaker 1: get the vaccine. Why I'm getting that bus soon as
Speaker 1: it comes out. Really it's out now. You know what
Speaker 1: I'm saying when my number comes up because you sign
Speaker 1: up is like I signed up, your number comes out, No,
Speaker 1: but my health insurance will call me like now it's
Speaker 1: like sixty five and over. Really, so I gotta I
Speaker 1: got wild? Do you have the second showance? You have
Speaker 1: your own? Okay? What insurance they have, Gary, not your business.
Speaker 1: We just want to know good good insurance. Biting comala Harris,
Speaker 1: come out of Harry scared. Oh my goodness, man, do
Speaker 1: you think are you getting the vaccine unless it's mandatory.
Speaker 1: If it's gonna sunk with my money, then I'm gonna
Speaker 1: get it. I meaning like you can't get on this
Speaker 1: plane unless you have a vaccine, then I I'll be
Speaker 1: forced into getting it. Like I caught it already. So
Speaker 1: now it's like if I didn't catch it, I didn't.
Speaker 1: I don't want to catch it, and I would have
Speaker 1: took it. But I've already caught it. So I mean,
Speaker 1: was it was gonna happen? When did you catch two
Speaker 1: months ago? Oh? No, it wasn't two months ago. Bad,
Speaker 1: I wasn't terrible when I caught it. I had one
Speaker 1: night to like the bed sweats. Yeah, but no diarrhea.
Speaker 1: I never really lost a lot of taste. So pussy
Speaker 1: it tasted the same, like there shouldn't be a taste.
Speaker 1: It should be as she could. It depends what she
Speaker 1: kind of seasoned her food or that. Well, we got
Speaker 1: somebody here that can help us with that. Well, that's
Speaker 1: a whole different show. This is Mike. I heard it
Speaker 1: when the pussy tastes like strawberries? You have COVID? That true?
Speaker 1: Who told you that? I just read it in the internet.
Speaker 1: I got it, and mine didn't really taste like that. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean that's talent. That's not how if you stick
Speaker 1: your fingers in it, you can just or have somebody
Speaker 1: to taste it. Have you ever tasted pussy taste today?
Speaker 1: I think, I mean I think a lot of girls
Speaker 1: probably if if a guy sticks dick in your pussy
Speaker 1: and then you put on your mom the saying come
Speaker 1: on in, we have a special guest today. Okay, what
Speaker 1: she all right? So let's get back to the strawberry.
Speaker 1: What happened? I've never heard of I heard you you
Speaker 1: should have no taste? Yeah, it's no taste, no smell.
Speaker 1: I heard this. Whatever the girl eats, that's what the
Speaker 1: pussy taste. Yeah, well that's somebody a pussy Chinese spect
Speaker 1: friends seven days ago? Something really? Yeah, Gary, am in
Speaker 1: a relationship with a baby. Huh? What a relationship with
Speaker 1: a girl? You have a girl that has a baby. No,
Speaker 1: I have a girl. My girl has a baby, my baby. Okay,
Speaker 1: why are you making this so comfortable? You have a
Speaker 1: girlfriend and she has a baby. No, my girlfriend is
Speaker 1: my baby? Is confusing? I'm confused. A girlfriend has a
Speaker 1: baby with the girlfriend. He calls the girlfriend his baby.
Speaker 1: He just forgot the first word. You don't even know
Speaker 1: what the funk you got, bro, I have a girlfriend
Speaker 1: with it. Yeah, that's what's your baby? Yeah, it's my baby?
Speaker 1: Your grandfriend a week ago? Yeah? Yeah, extrawberries. She on
Speaker 1: a period. Have you ever had a girl on a
Speaker 1: period before? Yeah? Sometimes, Mike, But you just don't go
Speaker 1: through the hole you got a girl doesn't smell right
Speaker 1: down it right? I think it's happened to every guy
Speaker 1: at some point in life. What's the worst thing you
Speaker 1: did do a girl to get out of it? Good question, Gary,
Speaker 1: I know mine. Any order on the one even gotta
Speaker 1: beat any order, just totally off. My dick would not
Speaker 1: get hard. I don't given how much what have you done? Like?
Speaker 1: Let me take give an example. The girl came over
Speaker 1: wait before marriage, right, Yeah, I'm in the navy. Girl
Speaker 1: comes over and the pants came down, and I went,
Speaker 1: what the fuck it's going on? Right now? That's what
Speaker 1: you said in my brain? I said. I literally it's
Speaker 1: three thirty in the morning. Because I met her at
Speaker 1: the club that night. I got I got this disappointment.
Speaker 1: I just remembered six am. She can say, gry, what
Speaker 1: do you smell like? Like a car? Hasn't an oil change?
Speaker 1: To this day, just to talk about it makes the
Speaker 1: hair on my arms standing because this is just her
Speaker 1: taking her pants down. Me not even touched her. What
Speaker 1: the fund just happened in the room like the devil
Speaker 1: was between her legs. Gary, No, No, but I think
Speaker 1: what I'll do in this situation, Yeah, no, I'll just
Speaker 1: be like you know what that's when you act like
Speaker 1: it's not about sex? What is it, Mike? About love? No,
Speaker 1: let's cut it, Let's get to know each other. What
Speaker 1: it means that I don't want to see you? I
Speaker 1: don't want to ever see your as again. Like, what
Speaker 1: if she looks like Rihanna, here's the thing, pretty as ship, Rihanna,
Speaker 1: I think as mature people. Yeah, but somebody, even it's
Speaker 1: a bad breath or whatever it is, I think we
Speaker 1: should tell that person. A lot of time people don't
Speaker 1: know the smell somebody else don't tell them, Like, you know,
Speaker 1: imagine every guy did that to her. How would she know?
Speaker 1: She thinks, how do you know when you smell? This
Speaker 1: was an amazing conversation. It was amazing. I was like,
Speaker 1: it was so strong. Explain it was like being an
Speaker 1: a sauna. Yeah, somebody just took her ship. It's moist
Speaker 1: and hot and you're stuck in it. And this is
Speaker 1: I'm not talking you just got the SNG. This I'm talking.
Speaker 1: You're in a full on sweat after twenty minutes in
Speaker 1: the song. All right, here's the thing infection. That's right,
Speaker 1: But don't you think you should You should tell you
Speaker 1: got a hurder, the disappointment that's gonna hurt. Because they
Speaker 1: went from we're about to do this everything else to
Speaker 1: literally my body went guys, but you know what, there's
Speaker 1: guys that really like when the pussy smell and they
Speaker 1: actually have a fish smell in pennies. No seriously, and
Speaker 1: they were like a pussy, the smell of pussy, but
Speaker 1: not a stink pussy. Yeah, I have never in my
Speaker 1: life heard of the stink pussy syndrome. I've never heard
Speaker 1: like I've seen a lot of fetishes and heard a
Speaker 1: lot of fenshes. You're the first person to have you listen.
Speaker 1: I've told a girl she has an order before and
Speaker 1: the girls told me my breath. Let me tell you
Speaker 1: something like, sometimes we don't know our breath steak. Some
Speaker 1: people like you could not know your breath smells. Mind you.
Speaker 1: I grew up in Africa. We don't go the dentist
Speaker 1: on the regular. No, we did it on the regular, right,
Speaker 1: So I came to America. I probably got my teeth
Speaker 1: clean one time one time and then us what a
Speaker 1: girl wants and she was like, we had like a
Speaker 1: falling out and she has a by the way to
Speaker 1: go get your fucking teeth clean, right, And no, no, no,
Speaker 1: I'm glad she did it. From there on. Let me
Speaker 1: tell you, I go to the dentist every fucking six
Speaker 1: months after that. Comprised to that, I was the dentist
Speaker 1: blunts in my life. So then I went to the dentist.
Speaker 1: I said, you know, it's some girl to my breath steak.
Speaker 1: I need to get my teeth and she did it.
Speaker 1: That was the best thing she ever did for me.
Speaker 1: If you with somebody that breast thing that could your smell,
Speaker 1: they have on order, you have to tell them. You
Speaker 1: say it in the nice way because you don't want
Speaker 1: to hurt. Sensitive, say the think. Some people ain't deny you,
Speaker 1: like I'm a one time I to a girl like,
Speaker 1: you know, hey, listen, he had an order. It could
Speaker 1: be some kind of infection or something. She's like, well,
Speaker 1: I better the doctors say nothing wrong. I'm like, hi,
Speaker 1: I'm trying to help Mike, but I wasn't. The dentist
Speaker 1: and the dentist did like before and after picture after
Speaker 1: they clean my teeth. I'm like, oh my god, that's
Speaker 1: why the fun my breath smelling and from their own,
Speaker 1: not just it was fucking it was like white to brown.
Speaker 1: Sometimes you don't know. So it's a kid to tell
Speaker 1: somebody if your friend has bad breath and listen, mother,
Speaker 1: your breath sting, Go get a teeth clean. A lot
Speaker 1: of people don't get their teeth clean. He might. I
Speaker 1: told you your forts you still, Yeah, I can help. Yes,
Speaker 1: he's the worst ever time. I just got over there
Speaker 1: all the time. I gotta stop eating dairies. That's why
Speaker 1: I'm with Darry. If I eat pancakes, it's in it
Speaker 1: and I love yeah, Birch Benders pancakes. Get that Brandca.
Speaker 1: I'm trying to help you from you know you like pancakes, Bro,
Speaker 1: it's that frozen from this. It's not frozen. You make
Speaker 1: it like you just had water, but Birch Benders. Yeah,
Speaker 1: so just whatever, you should help you. You should have
Speaker 1: told that girl how pussy stuck. Man, I'm disappointing you. Yeah,
Speaker 1: we're disappointing you. Gary. That was some years ago. Hopefully somebody,
Speaker 1: hopefully she grew up. She's not dead, but by now,
Speaker 1: do you remember her name? I couldn' d m her.
Speaker 1: You sure, Gary? You seem like you have good memory.
Speaker 1: Not that one. It's still makes the hair still my arm. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you still remember it. I never as long as I live.
Speaker 1: I'm telling you, I hope you run into her. If
Speaker 1: you I'm never running her into you, Gary, she's gonna
Speaker 1: slow you perform me somewhere you'll come intee your shape, like, hey,
Speaker 1: remember me the girl that he had a left for
Speaker 1: the dentist appointment? Oh this thing, pussy bitch. I'm gonna
Speaker 1: tell you pussy will steak. Please tell her if you
Speaker 1: want into her. What year was this? Gary doesn't matter.
Speaker 1: It's a long time we mutter I said it earlier,
Speaker 1: so we just got run the tape in trouble all right,
Speaker 1: Well it was fun. I mean we talked about everything
Speaker 1: you guys in your show with a bang. It's a
Speaker 1: great show, Mike, Mike, it's fun. All the fucking stink
Speaker 1: pussy ship. I'm just pussy. How could you have a
Speaker 1: show with It's a good top can on of your
Speaker 1: talk on this guy? Man? Please come on, come on,
Speaker 1: come on man, he and Gar tonight. Your wife will
Speaker 1: never you know about this, I guess anyway, as that
Speaker 1: guy's phones out. Man. Well yeah, well thanks for joining us,
Speaker 1: thanks for having Thank you guys, best friend, best friend,
Speaker 1: Thank you guys. I really didn't know his name. Thank you.
Speaker 1: Gary has the best stories. We would like to have
Speaker 1: you again. To Gary. You can follow Gary on his
Speaker 1: I g is Gary Owen no as Gary Owen Comedy.
Speaker 1: The guy will not give it up post he has.
Speaker 1: He just took your name. You want your body? He
Speaker 1: had it before. Yeah, he doesn't even respond. Do you
Speaker 1: want to buy a friend when you buy it from
Speaker 1: him or you don't even give anymore? I would buy it.
Speaker 1: How many followers does he have? Gary? Oh, he's probably sing.
Speaker 1: Happened to me on Twitter when I first got my Twitter,
Speaker 1: but he took my name and this guy was making
Speaker 1: money off my name because I wasn't on Twitter. And
Speaker 1: then when I got on Twitter, I was like, yo,
Speaker 1: this guy was a better me than I was. He
Speaker 1: was videos and every everything I did on talking like
Speaker 1: me on Twitter. And I'm like, yo, can I be
Speaker 1: myself please? Sir? Can I have my identity back? He's
Speaker 1: like no, he's making money back then, So eventually I
Speaker 1: got I sent my wipitaker to like Twitter and he
Speaker 1: took it from to give my name back. Yeah that's up. Well,
Speaker 1: hopefully you get your center Michael blacks and black and
Speaker 1: took it better. I got instagramed somehow to give my name.
Speaker 1: Whoa makes phone calls? Yeah, it makes some calls, man,
Speaker 1: and my guy makes the phone calls. I'll help you.
Speaker 1: Gary is probably some guy from Joining or something ears,
Speaker 1: what Asian? Are you Filipino? Right? Filipino? Chinese? Checking? Who
Speaker 1: is your body? Can I ask him the last question? Yeah?
Speaker 1: What's your question? What's you got going on next? What's next?
Speaker 1: New projects going on? So we should know nothing that's
Speaker 1: not It's a perfect time to create and put stuff
Speaker 1: together coming out. I don't like to talk about anything
Speaker 1: until I get a release date. So the first film
Speaker 1: I ever did was called Held Up with Jamie Fox.
Speaker 1: And that's where it took two and a half three years.
Speaker 1: That motherfucker to come out because they got any given
Speaker 1: Sunday right after it. So they held our movie to
Speaker 1: any given Sunday came out, and then they wanted to
Speaker 1: make sure they got the heat off that movie right.
Speaker 1: So literally, I'm telling all my friends back home, I
Speaker 1: got dinner movie mad Jamie Fox movie. I come back
Speaker 1: home a year later. Man, when the fund is that
Speaker 1: movie coming out? I was like, it's in Germany. Man,
Speaker 1: they released it. I come back the next Christmas. You
Speaker 1: ain't do the movie. I was like when they release
Speaker 1: Scott damn movie ever, I thought it was a liar
Speaker 1: for like two years. How am I one with? What's
Speaker 1: his name Michael joh White. That just came out in September.
Speaker 1: So I had a movie on Netflix came out in
Speaker 1: September called Welcome to Now. It just came out. I
Speaker 1: think we got the four on Netflix. I didn't realize
Speaker 1: how big Michael was overseas, Like it's one thing. He's
Speaker 1: like the black Jackie Chance in Europe and the Asian countries.
Speaker 1: I didn't realize how I did the movie with them,
Speaker 1: and then we were supposed to do a big press
Speaker 1: tour and then COVID hit and I was like, but
Speaker 1: the funny thing about the movie, Mike said, none of
Speaker 1: his movies ever made the Black Film Festival. There was it,
Speaker 1: the Miami Black Film Festival. Ours dead and COVID hit
Speaker 1: and we couldn't go. He goes, ain't that a bit?
Speaker 1: I finally put you in a movie with me and
Speaker 1: we can accepted the Miami Black Film Festival. And he
Speaker 1: told Universal, he said, I got the guy that he
Speaker 1: wants to play a sidekick. He goes, he'll bring in
Speaker 1: the black audience and then they go who and they
Speaker 1: started all these black comedians. He goes, Garry one h
Speaker 1: and then he got accepted the Black Film Festival I
Speaker 1: was like, I told you you're welcome, and then COVID hit, Hey, Gary,
Speaker 1: let me tell you one story that's real funny, it's true.
Speaker 1: Today I was listening to your your reality show, and
Speaker 1: then my girlfriend was cooking food and she goes, oh,
Speaker 1: the comedian is funny. Who's who is a black comedian? No, No,
Speaker 1: it's Gary Owen. Sure He's like, oh, it's very god.
Speaker 1: It sounds like black man. Thank you, all right, thank you,
Speaker 1: thank you, Gary Owen Comedy. That's his Instagram Chinese best
Speaker 1: friends in Carolina, Catalina. What's your insta, Carolina? What's your
Speaker 1: only fans? No, baby, I'm a real actress. Let me
Speaker 1: tell you she's a girl. She's a one of a career.
Speaker 1: So I protected on Instagram. Mind's Kiki Diablo, k e
Speaker 1: k e dot Diablo. Thank you for joining us. A
Speaker 1: no Philter Michael Blackson, thank you see next time I'm
Speaker 1: least or not No photo Michael Blackson is a cavery
Speaker 1: audio production brought to you by All Her Radio and
Speaker 1: the Black Fact Podcast Network. Produced by Brendan Morgan. Associate
Speaker 1: producer is Jeff Apple. Executive produced by Michael Blackson, Keegan
Speaker 1: Rosenberger and Dana Brunetti. Thank you for tuning in. Be
Speaker 1: sure to subscribe, rate, coming, and share wherever you listen
Speaker 1: to podcasts.