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Speaker 1: The question I've been asking myself is that, like, if

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Speaker 1: fifty million dollars landed in my bank account, what would

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Speaker 1: I do? Differently, I'm not even thinking about money whatsoever,

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Speaker 1: Like how would I I'm in like this reinvention place,

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Speaker 1: but I am holding on desperately to what was because

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Speaker 1: it's like so comfortable. Oh okay, you know. But then

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Speaker 1: also too, there's these new things coming in that I'm like,

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Speaker 1: I know that there is some shifting, you know, that

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Speaker 1: I'm supposed to be doing, and I have been side

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Speaker 1: stepping it like la la la la la la la

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Speaker 1: la la l you know, because I'm scared of like,

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Speaker 1: well what does it mean?

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Speaker 2: Hey, hey va fan, what's up? And welcome back to

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Speaker 2: Brown Ambition. It's your girl, Mandy Money. And I know

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Speaker 2: I say this every week, but this episode is truly

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Speaker 2: deeply special. It's obviously nothing to me, nothing like how

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Speaker 2: I anticipated this episode going. But usually when Tiffany Eliitre

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Speaker 2: is in the chair across from me, nothing really goes

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Speaker 2: to plan in the most delightful way possible. I'm so

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Speaker 2: excited to have Tiffany back on the show this week.

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Speaker 2: Y'all know, she's my original Brown Ambition co pilot, my really,

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Speaker 2: my everything when it comes to building this show together

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Speaker 2: for nine years. And I know she's been back on

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Speaker 2: the show a couple of times virtually, but she actually

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Speaker 2: showed up in person and slightly injured. I'm really sorry

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Speaker 2: about that, Tiffany, but I love you anyway. Today, Brown

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Speaker 2: Ambition fam, She's sure to talk about what's going on

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Speaker 2: with the budget, Nista, and what's going on with the

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Speaker 2: Live Richer Academy, which we'll learn has a brand new name.

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Speaker 2: We're going to take a little walk down memory lane

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Speaker 2: to the early days of Brown Ambition, and really talked

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Speaker 2: to Tiffany, and I mean she had never really Tiffany

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Speaker 2: rarely wastes time, you know, getting deep and getting real,

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Speaker 2: and she and I end up having a really moving

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Speaker 2: conversation about her journey through grief. I can't even believe

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Speaker 2: it's been five years since her husband, Darrelle passed away,

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Speaker 2: and so we're talking about her journey through grief, what

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Speaker 2: that's looking like for her today, and not only the

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Speaker 2: release of the paperback version of Get Good with Money,

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Speaker 2: which is coming out early April, but also what she

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Speaker 2: has plans for the next book, which I have been eagerly,

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Speaker 2: eagerly waiting for her to tell y'all, and I'm really

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Speaker 2: excited that she's talking about it today. If you want

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Speaker 2: to support the show, don't forget to share this episode

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Speaker 2: with someone that you think really needs to hear the

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Speaker 2: message that we talk about. You can also tag me

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Speaker 2: and all your social posts at Brown Ambition Podcast on Instagram,

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Speaker 2: at Brian Ambition on TikTok, send me your questions, your

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Speaker 2: feedback for the show. I'm Brianambition Podcast at gmail dot com.

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Speaker 2: Thank y'all so so much for the support all these years.

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Speaker 2: I hope you enjoyed this episode with Tiffany. It's really

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Speaker 2: really special and I'm going to stop you apping now

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Speaker 2: so we can get right into it, all right, enjoy

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Speaker 2: my conversation with Tiffany the Budgetista Alich. Tiffany, the budget

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Speaker 2: needs to Alich. Are you even doing that right? The

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Speaker 2: girls do this? I definitely they don't anyway, Fine, Tiffany.

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Speaker 2: Everyone knows you for your cool moves and even cooler jingles.

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Speaker 2: It's so weird having you here in person. What to

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Speaker 2: do with myself? Why do I feel nervous? I don't know,

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Speaker 2: but I'm happy to be here when's the last time

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Speaker 2: I saw you in person?

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Speaker 1: Oh it's been a while. Yeah, yeah it was in

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Speaker 1: When it is the last time I saw.

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Speaker 2: You in person? It was before Christmas?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't know that's really came to your house

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Speaker 1: for some sort of thanksgiving something that you have something

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Speaker 1: I don't remember.

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Speaker 2: Either way, we're feel well. Yeah. I was reflecting while

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Speaker 2: I was waiting, because you know, I.

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Speaker 1: Ran a little you know, CB timely whatever, I took

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Speaker 1: my back out.

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Speaker 2: Okay, it wasn't about CP, it was about the body. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: but you're here. Yeah, I was thinking, like, it's been

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Speaker 2: a year. It's been a year and one month since

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Speaker 2: I started doing the show, so low and you've come

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Speaker 2: back like once or twice as a virtual guest. But

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Speaker 2: it's really special to have you here in person.

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Speaker 1: I know, loving new digs. Okay, well yeah this is

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Speaker 1: all very new now.

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Speaker 2: I love kar in person. How does it feel for

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Speaker 2: you being back?

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Speaker 1: Well, one, I mean it feels completely different obviously because

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Speaker 1: usually you know, we're doing it virtually, so it just

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Speaker 1: feels like I'm on my friend's show. Then you know,

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Speaker 1: it's giving that like I feel, I don't know, I

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Speaker 1: feel really confident that I made the right choice because

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Speaker 1: you're rocking and socing. I was at for some of

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Speaker 1: you who like, you know, kind of live in New York,

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Speaker 1: around New York the New Yeakan Poetry Slam, right, so

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Speaker 1: you used to be in the alphobic city. So they

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Speaker 1: do it in the like some Bowery Poetry Club because

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Speaker 1: they're renovated. Anyway, I was there waiting in line to

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Speaker 1: go to the bathroom because y'all know, I got the

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Speaker 1: small bladder girls stand up and this black woman was like,

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Speaker 1: oh my god, but Jase, I love you so much,

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Speaker 1: Oh my god, Brand Ambition Fair Podcast, and she was like,

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Speaker 1: you tell that managra she is, Hey, doctor Anne, you

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Speaker 1: tell that man she she is killing it. She was like,

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Speaker 1: she's doing so good. She's like, honestly, I listen to her.

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Speaker 1: I listen when I'm like working out in the morning,

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Speaker 1: and I love it. I'm so happy about season two

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Speaker 1: and she's doing such a good job. She needs to

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Speaker 1: know that, that's what we think. And I said, don't

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Speaker 1: you worry, fist. What kind of doctor is she? She

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Speaker 1: is a professor, Oh professor, she had, but she's actually

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Speaker 1: from Illinois. She had brought like a bunch of students

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Speaker 1: to like see like poetry, like gritty w all poetry.

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Speaker 1: I thought that was really great.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, that's like a lifetime movie professor, the kids from

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Speaker 2: Illinois to the Big City.

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Speaker 1: I love it.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, that's really nice after And I did actually need

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Speaker 2: to hear that because there's days when I feel like

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Speaker 2: I'm really killing it. You know, there's days when it's

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Speaker 2: like who am I? Why am I here? Who gave

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Speaker 2: me this microphone? So yeah, I know it's been I mean,

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Speaker 2: you made that choice, but I think obviously it was

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Speaker 2: the right choice for you. I clocked that. You said.

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Speaker 2: It's you're feeling like you made the right choice because

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Speaker 2: I'm doing well, which is so you. But you're obviously

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Speaker 2: doing well. You feel better I do.

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Speaker 1: There's still some unloading I still have to do with

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Speaker 1: other parts that I'm like nervous about.

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Speaker 2: You know, it needs to be I don't want it.

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Speaker 2: Let's not say I want them to hear for day

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Speaker 2: or number.

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Speaker 1: But it was, you know, it was. But what I

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Speaker 1: loved is that because it went well, it gave me

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Speaker 1: the confidence to know that like these other big choices

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Speaker 1: that I have to make, will also be okay. There

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Speaker 1: of course, there's always this transition plea period that's a

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Speaker 1: little awkward, but you know, we get to say what

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Speaker 1: kind of life do you want to live and create

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Speaker 1: that life for yourself.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, and knowing when to let go of certain

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Speaker 2: it's hard, Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Especially when you feel like people are counting on you

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Speaker 1: and I'm like, is that true? Is that what you

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Speaker 1: told yourself? Or like as if to say, if I'm

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Speaker 1: not here, it all fall apart, Like that's his ego,

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Speaker 1: that's you know. So I'm trying to remove myself from

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Speaker 1: from that place of like if I don't do it,

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Speaker 1: it won't get done. It's like it might not get

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Speaker 1: done the way you would, but it'll still get done.

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Speaker 2: People are capable, Yeah, I mean, no one's more capable

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Speaker 2: than you. I want to hear. I think BA fan

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Speaker 2: wants like an update on budget, needs to ink. I mean,

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Speaker 2: you had the workbook come out, made whole the sion.

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Speaker 1: The softcover of Get Go with Money is coming out,

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Speaker 1: and I want to say, like either April first or

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Speaker 1: like March thirty first, m M.

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Speaker 2: There hasn't been a paperback yet.

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Speaker 1: No, So usually the way it goes is that a

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Speaker 1: year after your hardcover comes out, the paperback comes out

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Speaker 1: because sales has slumped, but y'all been keeping get your

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Speaker 1: money in the streets, honey.

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Speaker 2: Oh, it's like to like rejuvenate sales what you haven't.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and so so now it's coming out and so

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Speaker 1: it'll make you know, one is makes it like more

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Speaker 1: price effective for people who want to you know, like

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Speaker 1: get good with money, get good with money. And so

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Speaker 1: that's what's happening there. I'm doing a lot or working

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Speaker 1: a lot more B to B. Hopefully we'll have some

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Speaker 1: big partnership stand out soon, okay, because you know, the

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Speaker 1: girls don't have money, and I understand that, and so

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Speaker 1: what I've been trying to do, I've been shaking these

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Speaker 1: companies down, like, yeah, you want me, then you have

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Speaker 1: to give me money so I can make it low cost.

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Speaker 1: If if I had a magic ground, honestly, Mandy, I

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Speaker 1: would make these big, big financial institutions, big brands pay

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Speaker 1: me and then make everything I do free for everybody.

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Speaker 1: You know, Like that's like my ultimate, ultimate, ultimate goal.

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Speaker 1: But it like the more of these B to b's

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Speaker 1: that we get, then the more I can say, you

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Speaker 1: know what, instead of thirty bucks a month, how about

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Speaker 1: ten bucks a month? Okay, instead of ten bucks a month,

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Speaker 1: how about free? I could do one hundred thousand people

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Speaker 1: to get scholarships to our online school like that. That's

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Speaker 1: what I'm working hard on now is to they have

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Speaker 1: plenty of money and people need help. And the people

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Speaker 1: that I serve are struggling now more than ever, and

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Speaker 1: so I don't want to be a financial burden to them.

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Speaker 1: So if y'all work for one of these big old

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Speaker 1: corporations with who got a little coin here and there?

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Speaker 1: I want to be able to offer scholarships to people,

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Speaker 1: you know.

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Speaker 2: I mean, so you're talking about Literature Academy, which for years.

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Speaker 2: When did you launch Literature Accademy?

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Speaker 1: It's been like ten years. So we call the Gika

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Speaker 1: with Money Club now renamed it because I figured, like

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Speaker 1: y'all been loving Gika with Money. Yeah, And we taped

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Speaker 1: all the videos. There's live sessions monthly. You get your community,

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Speaker 1: which is so critical. We graduated about one hundred and

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Speaker 1: fifty thousand students since it's been that crazy when it

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Speaker 1: first came out, and I would love to be able

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Speaker 1: to offer like, you know, ten thousand student scholarships. I've

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Speaker 1: kept it as low as possible.

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Speaker 2: It's like you really have. It was a big deal.

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Speaker 2: I remember when Brown Ambition, when you came and you

200
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Speaker 2: were like really having like heartburn and like trepidation about

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Speaker 2: and raising the price from ten bucks.

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Speaker 1: A month to so like twenty nine ninety nine just

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Speaker 1: so we can stay a.

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Speaker 2: Lot, And it gave people like six months, I know,

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Speaker 2: a long yeah.

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Speaker 1: And even then, honestly, if I could, I'd love to

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Speaker 1: bring it back down to ten and quite honestly, I'd

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Speaker 1: love to just offer scholarships. But because we're getting a

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Speaker 1: lot of messages saying I want to stay, but I

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Speaker 1: don't have the money, and so I'm just like.

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Speaker 2: It's real because it's a subscription. Yes, everyone's looking at

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Speaker 2: their subscriptions. That's the first personal finance tip you get

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Speaker 2: when you're trying.

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Speaker 1: And I understand in expenses. So we're like, we've been

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Speaker 1: filling out grants, partnering with nonprofits and so that's the

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Speaker 1: aim of my big goal this year is to be

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Speaker 1: able to offer scholarships to people to say you can

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Speaker 1: still get the help. Don't worry about the finances. I

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Speaker 1: took care of it on the back end.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I was just trying to explain to Rio for

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Speaker 2: a BA fan that's my six year old, you know, rio,

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Speaker 2: And he was like, he's finally starting to understand like

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Speaker 2: money and what stuff costs. We got him like the

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Speaker 2: little Amazon Fire tablet, which is great because a parent.

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Speaker 2: If you're listening as a parent, I was really worried

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Speaker 2: about tablets. But it is like the amount of control

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Speaker 2: you have. I am the captain and I have everything

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Speaker 2: on my phone. If he pisses me off, pause, you know,

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Speaker 2: I don't like a word I hear delete, you know.

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Speaker 2: But he's like, you know, and all these in app

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Speaker 2: purchases are popping up and he wants to you know,

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Speaker 2: one dollar ninety nine cents for five hundred virtual coins

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Speaker 2: or whatever, and he's like, why does this stuff cost money?

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Speaker 2: And I just keep repeating to him, capitalism money. He's like,

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Speaker 2: capita is like and you know, you feel that, like

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Speaker 2: the prices are going up, Spotify's going up, and that's

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Speaker 2: just what capitalism does. It's like, that's why inflation is.

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Speaker 2: You know where it's at. It's not as bad as

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Speaker 2: it was, but it's you know, it's still there. And

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Speaker 2: it's really interesting and like refreshing to hear about a

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Speaker 2: business owner who is looking for ways to not have

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Speaker 2: to pull that very easy lever of let's just charge more.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, because I'm like, for where what is it? You

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Speaker 1: can't you know me and my sayings you can't. I

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Speaker 1: was gonna say, you can't squez bluffrom a tomato, but

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Speaker 1: I feel like it's from.

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Speaker 2: A rock stone, blood from a stuff. You can squeeze

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Speaker 2: a lot from a tomato and it ain't gonna be blood,

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Speaker 2: but yeah.

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Speaker 1: Stay relative. And I was like, you can't squeeze.

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Speaker 2: Bluff on top a leap coming through it is And.

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Speaker 1: So that's what I'm just like, But you know what

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Speaker 1: I mean, we always figure out a way. And I

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Speaker 1: just feel like because a lot of these big brands

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Speaker 1: have been coming to me and I'm like, yeay, I

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Speaker 1: don't want to hear about all that. Run me a

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Speaker 1: coin so I can offer scholarship. So that's what's been

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Speaker 1: on the table. We've been like drawing a hard line,

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Speaker 1: you know, because you want to parade me out, and

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Speaker 1: I'm like, cute, I don't mind dancing for a dollar

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Speaker 1: and dropping it like a hot for dream catchers. But

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Speaker 1: it has to make sense because that's the mission, and

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Speaker 1: the mission is always accessible financial education to people who

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Speaker 1: or who are wanting it.

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Speaker 2: It's hard. I feel like if I told you even

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Speaker 2: that I had this like sort of come to Jesus

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Speaker 2: Aha moment similar to you, like this, I know, Brown

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Speaker 2: Ambition is just one of the things that you've been,

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Speaker 2: you know, choosing to let go of so you can

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Speaker 2: open up for future growth. And I had this moment

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Speaker 2: in December where I had this epiphany of, like Mandy

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Speaker 2: money Makers my coaching practice. I was like, no, I

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Speaker 2: think I'm done with that. I want to close that door.

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Speaker 2: Did I not tell you this?

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Speaker 1: No?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, how did it happen? It was you know what

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Speaker 2: was happening is like Brown Ambition. I signed with iHeart.

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Speaker 2: Obviously that was a big deal. It was just a

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Speaker 2: couple of months after you left the show, and it

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Speaker 2: felt like everything is you know, there's all this pressure

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Speaker 2: on myself, this baby that we built together. I'm like,

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Speaker 2: I Broad Ambition has to live on, it has to succeed.

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Speaker 2: So I was at that point and at the same

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Speaker 2: time with Mandy money Makers and I'm writing my first book,

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Speaker 2: you know, and I'm taking my sweet time trying and

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Speaker 2: there's been a lot right and the Makers was consistent

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Speaker 2: kind of getting pushed to the back burner, and it

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Speaker 2: just I had to show up for Brown Ambition, you know,

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Speaker 2: this time last year. So I poured all of that

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Speaker 2: into it, Mandy money Makers. I really wasn't growing it

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Speaker 2: or investing time into it. And it wasn't that I

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Speaker 2: missed it, I realized. It was that I felt like, well,

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Speaker 2: I have this thing that I started. It has to succeed.

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Speaker 2: I have to I should be building that. And I

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Speaker 2: went to like a business coach and sat down and

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Speaker 2: I went there with the sole intention of being like, Okay,

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Speaker 2: I need to put Brown Ambition on, like, you know,

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Speaker 2: it's stable now. I'm you know, season two, Yay, it's

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Speaker 2: stable now. So okay, great, I need to like shift

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Speaker 2: my focus back to the Makers, which I feel like

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Speaker 2: is kind of dying on the vine and it's just

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Speaker 2: stable but not growing at all. And it was during

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Speaker 2: that conversation I went in with that intention, and there

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Speaker 2: was this question that came up of well, what if

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Speaker 2: it could just be Brown Ambition? You know, what if

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Speaker 2: you don't. And at first I was a little bit offended.

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Speaker 2: It's like, well you think I can't, And then I

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Speaker 2: just felt this like relief, this kind of like like

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Speaker 2: opening a window when something's like when you're really hot inside,

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Speaker 2: just open a window and like you feel this like

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Speaker 2: wave come over you. I mean it felt a little spiritual.

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Speaker 2: And yeah, and I don't really move slowly when I

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Speaker 2: make a decision. I really don't. And by the new year, Yeah,

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Speaker 2: I had let the makers know that I'm gonna be

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Speaker 2: ending like the group coaching aspect of it, you know,

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Speaker 2: and and and put my all into brown ambition and

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Speaker 2: it was super liberating. And I'm trying to figure out

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Speaker 2: I had a question attached to that or I just

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Speaker 2: wanted to let you know.

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Speaker 1: Actually, it's funny because my late in memory picked and

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Speaker 1: I was like, oh, that's fine. We did talk about this.

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Speaker 1: Oh we did. We did. I was like, because I

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Speaker 1: was like, because I remember I was on a walk,

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Speaker 1: but you know my memory.

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Speaker 2: I'm like, that's like, how did I not tell you

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Speaker 2: this big, gigantic news.

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Speaker 1: No, But I love that. Honestly, I think that I've

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Speaker 1: been afraid because I'm one of the things I admire

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Speaker 1: most about you is your ability to like make the decision,

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Speaker 1: then make the move. I will drag I will drag

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Speaker 1: my lame foot, like just for years, honey. And then

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Speaker 1: I suspect because my lower back is. I don't know

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Speaker 1: what I did to it. I just woke up and

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Speaker 1: I suspected stress because it was like a light light light.

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Speaker 1: And then it's almost like this part of me that's like,

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Speaker 1: you're not listening. Okay, we're gonna take this back out.

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Speaker 1: And so because I just I know when I'm stressed,

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Speaker 1: my and I don't listen to it.

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Speaker 2: You know.

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Speaker 1: Remember I had the high blood pressure for a long time,

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Speaker 1: even though I was you know, I was walking, I

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Speaker 1: was eating, but I was this and it was like, yeah, girl,

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Speaker 1: stress is we don't care about that walk, Yeah, fix

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Speaker 1: the inside, you know. And I suspect this lower back

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Speaker 1: because I didn't do anything. I didn't lift anything heavy.

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Speaker 1: So I have been like avoiding, like I really so

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Speaker 1: I think I told you that I want to write

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Speaker 1: this book about grief. Did I tell you I was

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Speaker 1: hoping we could talk about that.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, okay, And so.

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Speaker 1: I was avoiding that for a long, long long time

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Speaker 1: until like last week. I said tiphany at the time

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Speaker 1: because it's been coming up, and I'm like, yeah, girl, no,

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Speaker 1: I'm not by Denisa, not the grief Anie plus two,

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Speaker 1: Like you know, I feel relatively in a good, happy space,

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Speaker 1: like I think about like my relationship with my parents

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Speaker 1: or and it's a good place my sisters, my friends.

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Speaker 1: I'm in like a like a loving kind relationship with

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Speaker 1: like a partner. Now not the other partner. Then they

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Speaker 1: want may be knowing all my business. And so I

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Speaker 1: think I've been afraid to, like, you know, like upset

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Speaker 1: the apple cart if you will, if that's the same ring.

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Speaker 2: I don't know if that's the same knowing you probably isn't, you.

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Speaker 1: Know. And I've been avoiding in and it's almost like

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Speaker 1: being like, girl, it's time. And so I had already

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Speaker 1: told Penguin and my Heather, my agent, that I wanted

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Speaker 1: to do this external to them, Yeah, which because usually

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Speaker 1: when you sign a book, obviously they've been I won't

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Speaker 1: use it, wear harassed for me to do another one,

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Speaker 1: which is I get it because they're like, you know,

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Speaker 1: the other book did.

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Speaker 2: Well see also capitalism.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, they're like, girl, don't care about that grief. Girl

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Speaker 1: like anyway, now they can't, but you know, anyway, so

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Speaker 1: they were activity, you know, right, another bug r bug right,

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Speaker 1: another book, And I you know, I do have another

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Speaker 1: idea for a financial book, but nothing urgent. But this

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Speaker 1: book has been there's been like this urgency that's been

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Speaker 1: coming up for me. And I was even trying to

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Speaker 1: negotiate with the feeling to say, oh, maybe I'll read

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Speaker 1: about like the financial components of grief, and like the

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Speaker 1: grief was like do I need to pop you in

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Speaker 1: the mouth?

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Speaker 2: Girl? Yeah?

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Speaker 1: You know. And so I went to this event called

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Speaker 1: Author for Authors last year. I've been going every year

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Speaker 1: for the last three years. And some of y'all remember,

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Speaker 1: you have to be either a New York Times bestseller

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Speaker 1: or like have sold like a million copies or on

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Speaker 1: your way to sell a million copies of your book.

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Speaker 1: And so it's like twenty to thirty people. It's in Nashville,

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Speaker 1: and so the the environment of Author for Authors is

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Speaker 1: the literally the opposite of what my normal DreamCatcher is.

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Speaker 1: So black woman, you know, twenty five to fifty five,

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Speaker 1: you know, having a hard time with her finances. It's

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Speaker 1: the average, you know, and maybe not because she doesn't

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Speaker 1: make a lot, but she just having a hard time.

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Speaker 1: So this room is the exact opposite. Most of these

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Speaker 1: were like wealthy white men, if I'm being honest, and

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Speaker 1: they're like, ooh, one day someone looked around and said,

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Speaker 1: there's nobody else in here.

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Speaker 2: Let's get one black girl, which is when you got

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Speaker 2: yourself in there by selling the books.

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Speaker 1: I know I'm just saying, but I mean I've been

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Speaker 1: sold the books. They're just now coming around and be like,

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Speaker 1: oh hey girl. So anyway, so I've been going and

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Speaker 1: not honestly, everybody's really nice. So I went this time

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Speaker 1: last year and I one of my he's be kind

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Speaker 1: a friend of mine, the prophet first guy, Mike. What

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Speaker 1: is Mike's last name? But if for those of you

411
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Speaker 1: in business, many of you have read Profit First? And

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Speaker 1: I told him about audiobook almost everybody in business. It's

413
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Speaker 1: just a really great like book for business owners. And

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Speaker 1: so I kind of told him off to the side,

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Speaker 1: I have this idea about a book about grief, but

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Speaker 1: I don't know because i'm the budget. And he said,

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Speaker 1: you should tell the group because typically for the group,

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Speaker 1: you get up and you get to teach a ten

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Speaker 1: minute lesson of something you did well. So for me,

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Speaker 1: the year before, I taught about how I used my

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Speaker 1: community to sell books. So I was like, well, no,

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Speaker 1: because everyone's teaching this is I wouldn't be teaching anything,

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Speaker 1: you know, He's like, no, no, you should still let's

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Speaker 1: just see, let's check the temperature. I was like, nah,

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Speaker 1: but true to you know, Mike's personality. During lunchtime, He's like,

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Speaker 1: so we're going to have a lunchtime guest that we

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Speaker 1: weren't expecting. Tiffany Leach is going to talk about her

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Speaker 1: new book. And I was looking at Mic like, I

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Speaker 1: told you, you know, sir, so I get up in front

430
00:19:42,080 --> 00:19:44,160
Speaker 1: of this room. That's, like I said, the opposite of

431
00:19:44,200 --> 00:19:47,879
Speaker 1: like what I normally you know, connect with or connect

432
00:19:47,960 --> 00:19:51,800
Speaker 1: with me. And I was like, Okay, I'm not just

433
00:19:51,800 --> 00:19:53,359
Speaker 1: gonna say I want to write a book about grief.

434
00:19:53,400 --> 00:19:56,200
Speaker 1: So I just told the story of like my love

435
00:19:56,280 --> 00:20:00,000
Speaker 1: with Withdrew, my late husband. I think I opened up.

436
00:20:00,119 --> 00:20:05,040
Speaker 1: Was something like November of twenty twenty one. My husband

437
00:20:05,119 --> 00:20:07,920
Speaker 1: Drell called me and said, I have a headache, really

438
00:20:07,960 --> 00:20:11,199
Speaker 1: bad headache. It was Monday, I'll never forget, and I

439
00:20:11,240 --> 00:20:13,199
Speaker 1: was supposed to be heading out to like do this

440
00:20:13,240 --> 00:20:15,480
Speaker 1: event for Chase, and I was already dressed. I had

441
00:20:15,480 --> 00:20:18,080
Speaker 1: already got my makeup professionally done. The car was downstairs,

442
00:20:18,720 --> 00:20:22,040
Speaker 1: and he called me to say he was a feeling

443
00:20:22,040 --> 00:20:24,720
Speaker 1: well and something just because if you know Jery, remember

444
00:20:24,760 --> 00:20:26,240
Speaker 1: that that was a joke. Like child, he was going

445
00:20:26,320 --> 00:20:28,000
Speaker 1: to go to the pinky toe doctor. He loved to

446
00:20:28,040 --> 00:20:30,119
Speaker 1: go to damn doctor. So him saying I have a

447
00:20:30,160 --> 00:20:33,640
Speaker 1: headache didn't necessarily trigger anything, although it triggered something because

448
00:20:33,640 --> 00:20:35,800
Speaker 1: something said something's not right. And I said, do I

449
00:20:35,840 --> 00:20:37,520
Speaker 1: go to this chase event where they already paid me

450
00:20:37,520 --> 00:20:39,920
Speaker 1: and the money is spent, you know, and the car

451
00:20:40,000 --> 00:20:42,240
Speaker 1: is downstairs? It's literally the event is me speaking on

452
00:20:42,280 --> 00:20:44,840
Speaker 1: a stage? Or do I go to the emergency room

453
00:20:44,920 --> 00:20:47,119
Speaker 1: or do I go to the emergency room after the event.

454
00:20:47,720 --> 00:20:49,720
Speaker 1: And I was just like, to me go to the

455
00:20:49,720 --> 00:20:52,600
Speaker 1: emergency room. And so I called the car downstairs to

456
00:20:52,640 --> 00:20:55,680
Speaker 1: tell him, Hey, I'm not going to be able to go,

457
00:20:56,520 --> 00:21:00,000
Speaker 1: just go. And so I remember like I couldn't figure out.

458
00:21:00,000 --> 00:21:01,520
Speaker 1: I had to put on my geens, That's how nervous

459
00:21:01,520 --> 00:21:04,000
Speaker 1: I was, and I didn't. I was like why I

460
00:21:04,040 --> 00:21:06,640
Speaker 1: was shaking, you know, And I was like tiffany one

461
00:21:06,720 --> 00:21:10,000
Speaker 1: leg inside of the other. And I came downstairs and

462
00:21:10,000 --> 00:21:12,560
Speaker 1: the car is still downstairs though, like whatever black car

463
00:21:12,600 --> 00:21:15,280
Speaker 1: they had sent for me. And he had a bit

464
00:21:15,320 --> 00:21:18,000
Speaker 1: of an accent, the driver, and I remember telling him that.

465
00:21:19,600 --> 00:21:19,760
Speaker 2: No.

466
00:21:19,800 --> 00:21:22,000
Speaker 1: I don't think you understand. I'm not going. He said,

467
00:21:22,040 --> 00:21:24,840
Speaker 1: I heard you, but you can't drive yourself to the hospital.

468
00:21:25,119 --> 00:21:27,679
Speaker 1: I'm going to take you. I just remember being like

469
00:21:27,720 --> 00:21:29,560
Speaker 1: he was like an angel, and he was right. I

470
00:21:29,640 --> 00:21:32,959
Speaker 1: was shaking in that car and was I called Jirell's twin, Terrell,

471
00:21:33,040 --> 00:21:34,720
Speaker 1: his sister for Tiama, I called my mother. I called

472
00:21:34,720 --> 00:21:37,320
Speaker 1: everybody I could think of, and when I got to

473
00:21:37,359 --> 00:21:39,800
Speaker 1: the hospital, I wanted to jump down. He said, wait,

474
00:21:39,840 --> 00:21:41,760
Speaker 1: are your people here? And I said no. He said,

475
00:21:41,760 --> 00:21:44,320
Speaker 1: then wait, I will wait with you. And it was

476
00:21:44,359 --> 00:21:47,560
Speaker 1: like my first gift of grief that like, as you're

477
00:21:47,680 --> 00:21:51,480
Speaker 1: navigating sometimes the worst parts of laws, there will be

478
00:21:51,520 --> 00:21:54,200
Speaker 1: angels like that, like I don't know his name, I

479
00:21:54,200 --> 00:21:57,159
Speaker 1: don't know, but that's you know, Like I don't even

480
00:21:57,200 --> 00:21:58,840
Speaker 1: know who hired him. I don't know if it was

481
00:21:58,880 --> 00:22:02,560
Speaker 1: his car service or but people don't do that typically,

482
00:22:02,600 --> 00:22:05,000
Speaker 1: you know what I mean, Like you're hired to take

483
00:22:05,040 --> 00:22:07,560
Speaker 1: someone here and you're like, ah, I'm gonna flip the

484
00:22:07,560 --> 00:22:09,960
Speaker 1: script and take you someplace else, and I'm going to

485
00:22:10,000 --> 00:22:12,000
Speaker 1: stay with you. It was just so much compassion for

486
00:22:12,040 --> 00:22:14,560
Speaker 1: someone he didn't know. And I think about how many

487
00:22:14,560 --> 00:22:17,240
Speaker 1: other people I met along the way, and I shared

488
00:22:17,280 --> 00:22:19,320
Speaker 1: how like you know, that Monday he called me and

489
00:22:19,359 --> 00:22:22,879
Speaker 1: that by Friday drill was gone, just like that. Now

490
00:22:22,880 --> 00:22:25,160
Speaker 1: I remember thinking, like, yo, his toothbrush is still wet,

491
00:22:25,920 --> 00:22:28,960
Speaker 1: his shoes are still here, his tools are still in

492
00:22:29,000 --> 00:22:31,320
Speaker 1: the kitchen where I told him to move them. Like,

493
00:22:31,560 --> 00:22:36,720
Speaker 1: losing someone is like your house b between houses A

494
00:22:36,880 --> 00:22:39,160
Speaker 1: and C. And you go for a walk and come

495
00:22:39,200 --> 00:22:41,520
Speaker 1: back and your house is gone, and A and C

496
00:22:41,680 --> 00:22:44,720
Speaker 1: are neighbors. Now your house is not burned down, your

497
00:22:44,720 --> 00:22:47,360
Speaker 1: house is not demolished. There's no remnants where you could

498
00:22:47,359 --> 00:22:49,159
Speaker 1: be like, oh it makes sense there was a fire

499
00:22:49,680 --> 00:22:53,440
Speaker 1: or it was knocked down. It's just literally it's just disappeared.

500
00:22:53,560 --> 00:22:56,760
Speaker 1: And the neighbors have closed the gap. So your mind

501
00:22:56,800 --> 00:22:59,960
Speaker 1: can't even make sense of like how is this person

502
00:23:00,160 --> 00:23:03,520
Speaker 1: gone that was literally just here. And so I just

503
00:23:03,600 --> 00:23:07,280
Speaker 1: told like all of these stories that gave me gifts,

504
00:23:07,440 --> 00:23:11,480
Speaker 1: you know, like of grief if you will. And and

505
00:23:11,680 --> 00:23:13,480
Speaker 1: when I like kind of kind of came to it

506
00:23:13,560 --> 00:23:16,359
Speaker 1: was like maybe ten minutes of talking, there was like

507
00:23:16,359 --> 00:23:18,200
Speaker 1: not a dry on the room. All these men who

508
00:23:18,240 --> 00:23:20,600
Speaker 1: normally I wouldn't think would relate to me have related

509
00:23:20,600 --> 00:23:24,040
Speaker 1: in such a way that they were crying. And I

510
00:23:24,080 --> 00:23:25,520
Speaker 1: got so many hugs that day. I never held so

511
00:23:25,560 --> 00:23:28,880
Speaker 1: many white men in my life got some hugs that day.

512
00:23:29,200 --> 00:23:30,680
Speaker 1: So many men were like, yeah, I lost my dad

513
00:23:30,720 --> 00:23:33,399
Speaker 1: when I was sixteen, or I lost my you know,

514
00:23:33,480 --> 00:23:35,600
Speaker 1: my brother, I lost my Everyone wanted to tell me

515
00:23:36,200 --> 00:23:39,359
Speaker 1: a story of loss and I it was then that

516
00:23:39,440 --> 00:23:42,200
Speaker 1: I realized that that was a gift, even that grief

517
00:23:42,240 --> 00:23:45,720
Speaker 1: brings people together, no matter how different quote unquote you

518
00:23:45,840 --> 00:23:49,239
Speaker 1: might feel. It's a connector if you allow it.

519
00:23:49,800 --> 00:23:51,720
Speaker 2: And the.

520
00:23:53,240 --> 00:23:56,520
Speaker 1: Author of Atomic Habits, James Clear, was there and he

521
00:23:56,680 --> 00:23:58,320
Speaker 1: was like, Tiffany, you made me call my wife. I

522
00:23:58,320 --> 00:24:00,200
Speaker 1: want to be a better husband. The way you talk

523
00:24:00,200 --> 00:24:02,080
Speaker 1: about him. I hope that one day she talks about

524
00:24:02,080 --> 00:24:04,080
Speaker 1: me like that. So many men told me that too.

525
00:24:04,160 --> 00:24:09,320
Speaker 1: That was another gift, you know, you know, And so yeah,

526
00:24:09,359 --> 00:24:11,359
Speaker 1: that's when I was like, you have to write this book, Tiffany.

527
00:24:11,359 --> 00:24:14,240
Speaker 1: There's something here, not the financial version of this book,

528
00:24:14,640 --> 00:24:16,520
Speaker 1: but this book. And everyone was like, you need to

529
00:24:16,520 --> 00:24:19,439
Speaker 1: call it Gifts of Grief, you know. And so that

530
00:24:19,600 --> 00:24:22,400
Speaker 1: is the name, I think one of the best piece

531
00:24:22,400 --> 00:24:25,320
Speaker 1: of advice. It is a beautiful name, right, one of

532
00:24:25,359 --> 00:24:29,280
Speaker 1: the best piece of advice that James gave me. He said,

533
00:24:29,600 --> 00:24:34,760
Speaker 1: really transformative books take a commonly held belief and turn

534
00:24:34,800 --> 00:24:39,680
Speaker 1: it on its head, like atomic habits, right, that we

535
00:24:39,720 --> 00:24:42,520
Speaker 1: think to ourselves like, if you want this atomic like

536
00:24:43,000 --> 00:24:46,720
Speaker 1: shift in your life, then you have to do these

537
00:24:46,800 --> 00:24:50,440
Speaker 1: huge changes, you know, And he says, is that true?

538
00:24:50,480 --> 00:24:53,680
Speaker 1: Because atomic habits is about all these little things that

539
00:24:53,760 --> 00:24:57,040
Speaker 1: lead to big changes. So it's like, oh, okay, And he

540
00:24:57,119 --> 00:25:02,080
Speaker 1: said for you or for our work week. That's why

541
00:25:02,080 --> 00:25:03,679
Speaker 1: I blew up right, because it's like, no, no, you

542
00:25:03,720 --> 00:25:06,639
Speaker 1: can't have this successful life and only work four hours.

543
00:25:06,960 --> 00:25:09,560
Speaker 1: And Tim Ferriss is like, hmmm, I think you can

544
00:25:09,600 --> 00:25:13,440
Speaker 1: do minimal work for maximum return. That's a totally different shift.

545
00:25:13,680 --> 00:25:16,480
Speaker 1: And for me, gifts of grief is them. I want

546
00:25:16,480 --> 00:25:19,400
Speaker 1: to shift this thinking that grief is bad. I don't

547
00:25:19,440 --> 00:25:25,720
Speaker 1: think so. Certainly. The loss, yes, and even I hate

548
00:25:25,720 --> 00:25:27,760
Speaker 1: to use the word bad, but the loss is something

549
00:25:27,760 --> 00:25:31,359
Speaker 1: that no one is wanting. But I think that grief

550
00:25:31,440 --> 00:25:34,480
Speaker 1: actually is a good thing. That's the shift that it's

551
00:25:34,880 --> 00:25:38,080
Speaker 1: it is a gift, if you will, I had better clarity.

552
00:25:38,800 --> 00:25:41,080
Speaker 1: I'm a better daughter, I'm a better friend, I'm a

553
00:25:41,080 --> 00:25:45,119
Speaker 1: better sister. There's so many gifts. I'm better connected to

554
00:25:45,160 --> 00:25:47,280
Speaker 1: people like that room full of men that normally wouldn't

555
00:25:47,280 --> 00:25:49,359
Speaker 1: connect with me. And so I want to write about

556
00:25:49,960 --> 00:25:52,840
Speaker 1: like the story of like my love with Drell and

557
00:25:52,920 --> 00:25:56,080
Speaker 1: also other people's grief journey and then pull out the

558
00:25:56,119 --> 00:25:57,960
Speaker 1: gifts so people can take them with them as they

559
00:25:58,040 --> 00:26:00,720
Speaker 1: read it, you know. And so that's why I am

560
00:26:00,760 --> 00:26:02,560
Speaker 1: now where it's like totally it has nothing to do

561
00:26:02,640 --> 00:26:04,600
Speaker 1: with Janisa, you know what I mean. And I've been

562
00:26:04,600 --> 00:26:09,200
Speaker 1: fighting against it because one to bring up those feelings,

563
00:26:09,240 --> 00:26:11,199
Speaker 1: you know again, because it was a dark place for me.

564
00:26:12,040 --> 00:26:13,760
Speaker 1: You remember, I was like, why am I even here?

565
00:26:14,520 --> 00:26:16,359
Speaker 1: You know, a lot of ideation. I was just like,

566
00:26:16,600 --> 00:26:20,520
Speaker 1: so we can wrap this up, you know, And so

567
00:26:20,560 --> 00:26:22,600
Speaker 1: I was afraid to kind of go back there. But

568
00:26:22,640 --> 00:26:24,119
Speaker 1: it's like it's going to have its way. It like

569
00:26:24,200 --> 00:26:26,760
Speaker 1: won't leave me alone. So the book has to come out.

570
00:26:26,920 --> 00:26:30,120
Speaker 1: I'm gonna publish it totally differently. But yeah, I don't

571
00:26:30,119 --> 00:26:31,480
Speaker 1: know what's going to come out, And yall might be

572
00:26:31,520 --> 00:26:34,960
Speaker 1: asking I just I'm just gonna allow, like a really

573
00:26:34,960 --> 00:26:37,959
Speaker 1: good sculpture will tell you that they don't sculpt, you know,

574
00:26:38,160 --> 00:26:41,720
Speaker 1: the rock that they relieve the sculpture from the rock,

575
00:26:42,200 --> 00:26:44,320
Speaker 1: like there's already something in there and they're just there

576
00:26:44,320 --> 00:26:46,280
Speaker 1: to chip it away. And I feel like that's I'm

577
00:26:46,320 --> 00:26:47,959
Speaker 1: here to be a good steward of the thing that

578
00:26:48,000 --> 00:26:50,640
Speaker 1: already exists. So it's almost like the book is there

579
00:26:50,680 --> 00:26:53,520
Speaker 1: already and I'm just here to just sculpturate the unnecessary

580
00:26:53,720 --> 00:26:57,320
Speaker 1: pieces and to relief, you know, to create that relief

581
00:26:57,440 --> 00:26:59,160
Speaker 1: so I can share it with other people that might

582
00:26:59,160 --> 00:27:00,440
Speaker 1: be navigating this thing.

583
00:27:00,640 --> 00:27:04,640
Speaker 2: So yeah, I'm so proud of you.

584
00:27:05,000 --> 00:27:06,920
Speaker 1: It might be private. I'm I go get you either way.

585
00:27:07,160 --> 00:27:09,439
Speaker 2: I you know, maybe I would be crying, but it's

586
00:27:09,480 --> 00:27:11,160
Speaker 2: probably as old loft. That's why I'm not.

587
00:27:15,280 --> 00:27:15,480
Speaker 1: I know.

588
00:27:17,280 --> 00:27:19,679
Speaker 2: It's permission, you know. I think what you really do

589
00:27:19,720 --> 00:27:23,080
Speaker 2: when you talk about grief and you are willing to

590
00:27:23,200 --> 00:27:25,840
Speaker 2: name it, it's like you give other people permission to

591
00:27:25,960 --> 00:27:28,080
Speaker 2: think about the thing that they have been pushing us

592
00:27:28,720 --> 00:27:30,520
Speaker 2: to get through the day, you know. And I think

593
00:27:31,000 --> 00:27:35,040
Speaker 2: it's it's more universal than even people who've lost love. Yes,

594
00:27:35,520 --> 00:27:37,560
Speaker 2: you know, the way you're talking about it is sometimes

595
00:27:37,600 --> 00:27:40,080
Speaker 2: how I talk to people who've lost jobs, you know,

596
00:27:41,600 --> 00:27:47,680
Speaker 2: lost their home, you know, something like that, any loss honestly, Yeah,

597
00:27:47,880 --> 00:27:50,280
Speaker 2: I mean, gosh, yes, there's grieving in that I still

598
00:27:50,280 --> 00:27:54,240
Speaker 2: hold Yeah, yeah, I know that the world you know,

599
00:27:54,320 --> 00:27:56,399
Speaker 2: needs that book. I mean from the minute that you

600
00:27:56,400 --> 00:28:00,760
Speaker 2: were even speaking about it, it's like, well, of course, yeah, oh,

601
00:28:00,800 --> 00:28:03,000
Speaker 2: I'm really really excited for that, and I think the

602
00:28:03,040 --> 00:28:08,160
Speaker 2: world needs it. Grief is the gift of grief, gifts

603
00:28:08,160 --> 00:28:11,320
Speaker 2: of grief, gifts of grief. Yeah. It's also that like

604
00:28:11,400 --> 00:28:15,879
Speaker 2: cognitive behavioral thing of taking a concept and yeah, flipping it,

605
00:28:16,320 --> 00:28:19,560
Speaker 2: flipping it and reversing it so that what is hurting

606
00:28:19,600 --> 00:28:23,320
Speaker 2: you can actually empower you. And it's one of the

607
00:28:23,359 --> 00:28:27,640
Speaker 2: most challenging, like daily, yeah, one of the daily challenges

608
00:28:27,640 --> 00:28:31,239
Speaker 2: that I have. Even there's a lot of like, you know,

609
00:28:31,520 --> 00:28:33,440
Speaker 2: moments during the day where I'm like this is too

610
00:28:33,480 --> 00:28:37,040
Speaker 2: hard or this is really killing me, and it's like, okay,

611
00:28:37,040 --> 00:28:39,360
Speaker 2: but what is this moment trying to give you or

612
00:28:39,400 --> 00:28:41,200
Speaker 2: teach you? Is one of the things that when I'm

613
00:28:41,280 --> 00:28:44,000
Speaker 2: really good and I have a good mindset, that I

614
00:28:44,040 --> 00:28:47,120
Speaker 2: can remind myself to use and so that makes so

615
00:28:47,280 --> 00:28:50,800
Speaker 2: much sense. Yeah, Okay, Well I'll just be waiting.

616
00:28:50,800 --> 00:28:53,000
Speaker 1: And I know, and I'm like sometimes I ask myself, well,

617
00:28:53,040 --> 00:28:56,440
Speaker 1: what does that mean for? But Denisa, you know, I

618
00:28:56,480 --> 00:28:57,600
Speaker 1: don't know, you.

619
00:28:57,800 --> 00:28:58,920
Speaker 2: Can they not coexist?

620
00:28:59,120 --> 00:29:00,520
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm not saying that, but I guess I've just

621
00:29:00,520 --> 00:29:03,560
Speaker 1: been asking myself in general. Like the questions I've been

622
00:29:03,560 --> 00:29:07,640
Speaker 1: asking myself is that, like, if you know, fifty million

623
00:29:07,640 --> 00:29:10,120
Speaker 1: dollars landed in my bank account, what would I do? Differently,

624
00:29:10,560 --> 00:29:12,640
Speaker 1: meaning like where I'm like at a space where I'm

625
00:29:12,640 --> 00:29:16,800
Speaker 1: not even thinking about money whatsoever, Like how would I

626
00:29:16,800 --> 00:29:19,480
Speaker 1: I'm in, I'm like this reinvention place, but I am

627
00:29:19,520 --> 00:29:22,600
Speaker 1: holding on desperately to what was because it's like so comfortable,

628
00:29:23,600 --> 00:29:25,800
Speaker 1: you know, but then also too, there's these new things

629
00:29:25,840 --> 00:29:29,520
Speaker 1: coming in that I'm like, I'm you know, I you know,

630
00:29:29,600 --> 00:29:31,840
Speaker 1: I had to lose my job, to leave the teaching.

631
00:29:32,880 --> 00:29:36,160
Speaker 1: You know. It was like the Divine God was like, girl,

632
00:29:36,520 --> 00:29:38,640
Speaker 1: I suppld you to wrap this up, Okay, don't worry

633
00:29:38,680 --> 00:29:41,360
Speaker 1: about it since the day can't say that it's closed,

634
00:29:42,040 --> 00:29:44,520
Speaker 1: you know. And I'm not saying I'm closing, not much, anista,

635
00:29:44,560 --> 00:29:47,840
Speaker 1: but it's just I know that there is some shifting,

636
00:29:48,520 --> 00:29:50,719
Speaker 1: you know, that I'm supposed to be doing, and I

637
00:29:50,760 --> 00:29:53,160
Speaker 1: have been sidestepping it like la la la la la

638
00:29:53,200 --> 00:29:56,080
Speaker 1: la la la la, you know, because I'm scared of like, well,

639
00:29:56,080 --> 00:29:59,080
Speaker 1: what does it mean you know, like if in the

640
00:29:59,160 --> 00:30:01,840
Speaker 1: you know, if I about this book, like is this

641
00:30:01,960 --> 00:30:05,280
Speaker 1: who my new identity is? And you know, like what

642
00:30:05,400 --> 00:30:08,040
Speaker 1: does this slow down? And you know, and so I've

643
00:30:08,040 --> 00:30:09,480
Speaker 1: been really.

644
00:30:09,200 --> 00:30:15,800
Speaker 2: Just afraid it's a bigger stage you're walking into. That's

645
00:30:15,840 --> 00:30:18,120
Speaker 2: what I'm feelings. And I've always felt that way. I mean,

646
00:30:18,480 --> 00:30:22,240
Speaker 2: not that personal finance is limiting or you know, but

647
00:30:23,080 --> 00:30:26,080
Speaker 2: it's maybe it is. Yeah, it's a bit of a niche, right,

648
00:30:26,480 --> 00:30:30,280
Speaker 2: and you've always brought so much more to the table.

649
00:30:31,040 --> 00:30:35,200
Speaker 2: I mean, I think of someone with like the I mean,

650
00:30:35,280 --> 00:30:39,000
Speaker 2: with the ability to connect with people and to encourage

651
00:30:39,000 --> 00:30:42,280
Speaker 2: and inspire the way that you do. It's not a

652
00:30:42,320 --> 00:30:46,160
Speaker 2: common gift. It's also something that I don't want to

653
00:30:46,240 --> 00:30:47,960
Speaker 2: like this is going to sound I don't know, I

654
00:30:48,000 --> 00:30:50,640
Speaker 2: don't want it to sound like what do you call it?

655
00:30:50,720 --> 00:30:53,400
Speaker 2: Just like I'm blowing smoke. But it's like an Oprah,

656
00:30:53,920 --> 00:30:56,720
Speaker 2: you know, or a Deepak Chopra. It's like these big

657
00:30:58,480 --> 00:31:02,280
Speaker 2: spiritual sort of for these messages that people need to hear.

658
00:31:02,320 --> 00:31:05,760
Speaker 2: And I feel like that deserves a global stage, a

659
00:31:05,800 --> 00:31:09,760
Speaker 2: bigger stage than maybe with Budgetista, where you've you know,

660
00:31:09,800 --> 00:31:12,640
Speaker 2: and you've done so much with Budgetista, but it just

661
00:31:12,640 --> 00:31:15,480
Speaker 2: feels like a door too much, bigger things.

662
00:31:15,920 --> 00:31:18,520
Speaker 1: Maybe I'm afraid of that. I know that's fair, you know,

663
00:31:18,520 --> 00:31:20,000
Speaker 1: because like, well we'll get required of me.

664
00:31:22,320 --> 00:31:24,960
Speaker 2: Hey ba fam, We're gonna take a quick break, pay

665
00:31:25,000 --> 00:31:26,840
Speaker 2: some bills, and we'll be right back.

666
00:31:29,240 --> 00:31:32,480
Speaker 1: I have therapy in two days. But I was talking

667
00:31:32,480 --> 00:31:35,480
Speaker 1: to doctor Green about you know, this book, and and

668
00:31:35,560 --> 00:31:38,440
Speaker 1: she was just like, I mean, it's natural to, you know,

669
00:31:38,480 --> 00:31:40,200
Speaker 1: to be afraid. She's like, oh, one, I'm sure you're

670
00:31:40,200 --> 00:31:42,080
Speaker 1: afraid of those feelings coming back up. And also you're

671
00:31:42,080 --> 00:31:46,440
Speaker 1: in a good place, and she said, and also you know,

672
00:31:46,760 --> 00:31:48,960
Speaker 1: and I do know this, like as the Budjanista. Literally

673
00:31:49,560 --> 00:31:53,000
Speaker 1: I can go like I could be, you know, at

674
00:31:53,080 --> 00:31:55,440
Speaker 1: Whole Foods, you know, squeeze and mangos to figure out,

675
00:31:55,480 --> 00:31:57,440
Speaker 1: and someone will stop me and say, oh my god, Tiffany,

676
00:31:58,120 --> 00:32:00,120
Speaker 1: can I after ask you a question about credit? And

677
00:32:00,160 --> 00:32:02,440
Speaker 1: I love it? The teacher means, I guess yes, but

678
00:32:02,560 --> 00:32:04,720
Speaker 1: I guess there's a back end behind my head that

679
00:32:04,880 --> 00:32:07,880
Speaker 1: I know that the shift might be. You know, I

680
00:32:07,960 --> 00:32:12,080
Speaker 1: lost my grandmother and I'm really nervous about because I

681
00:32:12,080 --> 00:32:14,080
Speaker 1: don't have boundaries when it comes to you asking me

682
00:32:14,120 --> 00:32:18,120
Speaker 1: about finances because it's not it's uplifting, it's not you

683
00:32:18,160 --> 00:32:20,200
Speaker 1: know what I mean, We're not like crying in the aisles,

684
00:32:20,720 --> 00:32:25,920
Speaker 1: but and I'm not, you know, and so and so

685
00:32:25,960 --> 00:32:28,040
Speaker 1: we talked about that that like she's like, this is

686
00:32:28,080 --> 00:32:32,040
Speaker 1: a different because someone coming up to you. I told

687
00:32:32,080 --> 00:32:33,960
Speaker 1: you that that story about how I went to the

688
00:32:34,160 --> 00:32:37,120
Speaker 1: urgent care. I don't want to tell the full story,

689
00:32:37,120 --> 00:32:38,800
Speaker 1: but yeah.

690
00:32:38,640 --> 00:32:42,760
Speaker 2: Medical professionals still applied. I mean, if you recognize your patients.

691
00:32:42,840 --> 00:32:44,120
Speaker 2: I mean I went to urgent care.

692
00:32:44,160 --> 00:32:46,800
Speaker 1: I had a mask, but I had glasses on, and

693
00:32:46,880 --> 00:32:49,760
Speaker 1: I just was like and so she came in, the

694
00:32:49,760 --> 00:32:51,760
Speaker 1: doctor gave me was just looking at me strange, like huh.

695
00:32:51,800 --> 00:32:54,120
Speaker 1: And I was thinking, like, you know, what's this look?

696
00:32:54,120 --> 00:32:56,280
Speaker 1: And she came back she said I knew it was you,

697
00:32:56,720 --> 00:32:59,280
Speaker 1: and then proceeded to give me Ayana Bonza Bosom hug

698
00:32:59,600 --> 00:33:01,320
Speaker 1: to tell me I'm so sorry about the loss of

699
00:33:01,360 --> 00:33:03,280
Speaker 1: your husband, because I had been It was November and

700
00:33:03,320 --> 00:33:05,320
Speaker 1: that's the month for how passed away, and we had

701
00:33:05,320 --> 00:33:07,800
Speaker 1: been posting about his annual toy drive, so it was

702
00:33:07,880 --> 00:33:12,120
Speaker 1: fresh in her mind. But I remember thinking to myself, okay,

703
00:33:12,720 --> 00:33:15,240
Speaker 1: and I thought about, what does that look like on

704
00:33:15,280 --> 00:33:19,920
Speaker 1: a day to day basis of someone stopping me to say,

705
00:33:19,960 --> 00:33:21,280
Speaker 1: I just want to say that, like I lost my

706
00:33:21,320 --> 00:33:23,360
Speaker 1: grandmother two days ago and I just admit that. And

707
00:33:23,400 --> 00:33:26,080
Speaker 1: because I'm EmPATH, you know, yes you are, and so

708
00:33:26,600 --> 00:33:28,320
Speaker 1: I'm going to cry with you. And so it's like,

709
00:33:28,440 --> 00:33:31,400
Speaker 1: what what does that do? And I think I'm nervous

710
00:33:31,400 --> 00:33:33,560
Speaker 1: about that, but I think it'll force me to create

711
00:33:33,600 --> 00:33:35,400
Speaker 1: the boundaries.

712
00:33:35,480 --> 00:33:38,600
Speaker 2: You got to get on Brene Brown's phone list or

713
00:33:38,600 --> 00:33:40,400
Speaker 2: get her phone number or something. You could probably do that.

714
00:33:42,040 --> 00:33:45,560
Speaker 2: Ask your author mastermind, because Brene Brown, she wrote, does

715
00:33:45,640 --> 00:33:47,720
Speaker 2: she write about it or she did a podcast about it?

716
00:33:47,840 --> 00:33:50,479
Speaker 2: About walking through? Was it Adam Grant? She was walking

717
00:33:50,480 --> 00:33:54,240
Speaker 2: through like anyway another like thought leader, expert person, and

718
00:33:54,280 --> 00:33:57,040
Speaker 2: how she would get stopped they were together, but she

719
00:33:57,080 --> 00:33:59,640
Speaker 2: would get stopped constantly by people who were like pouring

720
00:33:59,680 --> 00:34:01,920
Speaker 2: out their lives to her. And it's about that. It's

721
00:34:01,920 --> 00:34:04,200
Speaker 2: about being a woman. And I think the way people

722
00:34:04,240 --> 00:34:06,960
Speaker 2: in society sort of thinks of you, and especially I

723
00:34:07,240 --> 00:34:09,600
Speaker 2: mean to be a black woman and to bring that,

724
00:34:09,640 --> 00:34:12,840
Speaker 2: I think that unfortunately society is like comfort me and

725
00:34:12,880 --> 00:34:15,000
Speaker 2: hold me in your bosom, make me feel better, take

726
00:34:15,080 --> 00:34:17,600
Speaker 2: my burden and let me offload it onto you. And

727
00:34:17,640 --> 00:34:20,560
Speaker 2: so I think that that's extremely fair. But the fact

728
00:34:20,600 --> 00:34:23,160
Speaker 2: that you are aware of it, and I think you

729
00:34:23,239 --> 00:34:27,920
Speaker 2: have everything you need to build that structure and protection

730
00:34:28,040 --> 00:34:31,400
Speaker 2: for yourself, you know. At the same time, if you

731
00:34:31,480 --> 00:34:33,960
Speaker 2: decided now I'm gonna write this book and then I'm

732
00:34:33,960 --> 00:34:37,959
Speaker 2: gonna move to the Maldives or wherever, then that would

733
00:34:37,960 --> 00:34:42,080
Speaker 2: be fine too. It's not like writing this book and

734
00:34:42,400 --> 00:34:44,400
Speaker 2: like the book is the gift, right you're giving to people.

735
00:34:44,400 --> 00:34:47,359
Speaker 2: It doesn't then mean that you need to, yeah, give

736
00:34:47,400 --> 00:34:49,160
Speaker 2: the rest of your life in service.

737
00:34:48,840 --> 00:34:49,319
Speaker 1: To that book.

738
00:34:49,400 --> 00:34:53,719
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, but it's also like, maybe just write the book.

739
00:34:53,920 --> 00:34:55,600
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's what I deal with the you know. I mean,

740
00:34:55,640 --> 00:34:57,440
Speaker 1: I love the one the baby doesn't like your shoes,

741
00:34:58,280 --> 00:34:59,680
Speaker 1: you know, I like to tumble toward them.

742
00:35:00,040 --> 00:35:03,080
Speaker 2: Yeah, just made me write some words on the page.

743
00:35:03,719 --> 00:35:05,719
Speaker 1: And I haven't been honestly, I've been writing. I've been.

744
00:35:06,360 --> 00:35:09,960
Speaker 1: I met like, it's funny, how like you know, when

745
00:35:10,000 --> 00:35:12,840
Speaker 1: she started to decide, I met this woman who was like,

746
00:35:13,040 --> 00:35:15,000
Speaker 1: because for this book, I think I really like like

747
00:35:15,040 --> 00:35:18,399
Speaker 1: a co writer to kind of rear me in. I'm

748
00:35:18,400 --> 00:35:20,759
Speaker 1: just not ot all over the place, and so someone

749
00:35:20,800 --> 00:35:22,480
Speaker 1: I can kind of tell the stories to and then

750
00:35:22,560 --> 00:35:24,799
Speaker 1: correct craft what I want the narrative to kind of be. Like,

751
00:35:25,080 --> 00:35:27,719
Speaker 1: So I met this woman and she was just like,

752
00:35:27,920 --> 00:35:30,240
Speaker 1: I would love to write your book. And she's written

753
00:35:30,239 --> 00:35:34,880
Speaker 1: books with Michelle Obama, Malala Elaine Welteroff. She was just

754
00:35:34,880 --> 00:35:36,640
Speaker 1: so nice and I didn't know that when I when

755
00:35:36,680 --> 00:35:39,319
Speaker 1: we had like lunch. So it's kind of like what

756
00:35:39,360 --> 00:35:41,880
Speaker 1: I call those god nods where it's like, huh, you

757
00:35:41,920 --> 00:35:44,960
Speaker 1: know what I mean to think you're on the right path. Yeah, no,

758
00:35:45,080 --> 00:35:48,960
Speaker 1: I'm I'm like both looking forward to it and also nervous.

759
00:35:49,360 --> 00:35:51,120
Speaker 1: Doctor Green told me that it's three people I need

760
00:35:51,160 --> 00:35:54,000
Speaker 1: to let know because my current partner, now I had

761
00:35:54,000 --> 00:35:57,120
Speaker 1: already kind of been telling him about the books. She said, no,

762
00:35:57,200 --> 00:35:59,279
Speaker 1: but in a way that says it's about to be

763
00:35:59,400 --> 00:36:03,839
Speaker 1: the dull show for a little bit, Like, you know,

764
00:36:03,920 --> 00:36:05,680
Speaker 1: it's not just me writing this book. People are gonna

765
00:36:05,719 --> 00:36:09,160
Speaker 1: be like, oh, you're amazing sat to us, you know,

766
00:36:09,920 --> 00:36:12,080
Speaker 1: because you know he's been satified. Sometimes it's funny because

767
00:36:12,080 --> 00:36:13,640
Speaker 1: I'll think of something that he did to piss me off,

768
00:36:13,640 --> 00:36:15,120
Speaker 1: and I'll laugh and I'm like, remember that time you

769
00:36:15,120 --> 00:36:18,360
Speaker 1: pissed me off. I'm like yeah, he wasn't all that perfect,

770
00:36:19,840 --> 00:36:22,279
Speaker 1: remember the time, not gonna. I'm like, sir me and

771
00:36:22,320 --> 00:36:28,520
Speaker 1: Manny tape every Monday, you need a sandwich, Hey Mandy,

772
00:36:28,640 --> 00:36:33,840
Speaker 1: I'm like, you know, but it's about to be. And

773
00:36:33,880 --> 00:36:35,440
Speaker 1: then she also said, you know, you have to let

774
00:36:35,480 --> 00:36:39,439
Speaker 1: Alissa and Terrell know. And I thought about that, you know, because.

775
00:36:39,560 --> 00:36:40,600
Speaker 2: Drell's daughter and brother.

776
00:36:40,760 --> 00:36:44,720
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's twin brother, and so I you know, because

777
00:36:44,719 --> 00:36:47,239
Speaker 1: it's it's going to bring up people coming up to

778
00:36:47,280 --> 00:36:50,960
Speaker 1: them as well. I always worry the most about Terrell

779
00:36:51,200 --> 00:36:53,560
Speaker 1: because he said, yo, I don't even like look at

780
00:36:53,560 --> 00:36:57,360
Speaker 1: the mirror sometimes, y'all, because I mean, they're identical twins,

781
00:36:57,600 --> 00:37:01,279
Speaker 1: and you know, I just I feel like, if there

782
00:37:01,280 --> 00:37:03,799
Speaker 1: is such thing as a soulmate, then being born with

783
00:37:03,880 --> 00:37:05,799
Speaker 1: like literally your other half is as close as you

784
00:37:05,800 --> 00:37:09,680
Speaker 1: can get, you know. And so there are still people

785
00:37:09,719 --> 00:37:12,000
Speaker 1: who don't know that that Jill passed away and will

786
00:37:12,000 --> 00:37:13,600
Speaker 1: come up to Terrell and say, oh, hey, Joan, how

787
00:37:13,600 --> 00:37:16,040
Speaker 1: you been. I ain't see it in a minute. He's like,

788
00:37:16,080 --> 00:37:17,680
Speaker 1: I just roll with it because it's too hard to

789
00:37:17,760 --> 00:37:21,680
Speaker 1: just say yo, he's gone, yo, you know. Yeah, And

790
00:37:21,719 --> 00:37:23,959
Speaker 1: so you know, so that was I was so glad

791
00:37:24,000 --> 00:37:26,640
Speaker 1: She said that because when I do this thing, it

792
00:37:26,960 --> 00:37:30,440
Speaker 1: will likely bring up for them this like you know

793
00:37:30,600 --> 00:37:33,719
Speaker 1: resurgence of you know, outpouring of love. But still it's

794
00:37:33,760 --> 00:37:38,239
Speaker 1: a lot. And so yeah, So I mean that's been like,

795
00:37:38,360 --> 00:37:42,399
Speaker 1: you know, mostly like life lately. Just yeah, although it's

796
00:37:42,400 --> 00:37:44,200
Speaker 1: clear I'm stressed about something because I'm like, why is

797
00:37:44,239 --> 00:37:44,799
Speaker 1: my back out?

798
00:37:45,280 --> 00:37:50,880
Speaker 2: I'm stressed all the time, girl, and I'm not healthy stress.

799
00:37:51,960 --> 00:37:54,480
Speaker 1: Have you ever been so stressed for so long that

800
00:37:54,560 --> 00:37:55,720
Speaker 1: you don't know that you're stressed?

801
00:37:55,760 --> 00:37:58,680
Speaker 2: That's the part that words terrified. You know, my mom,

802
00:37:58,960 --> 00:38:02,120
Speaker 2: I will start crying. I was raised by a single

803
00:38:02,160 --> 00:38:05,160
Speaker 2: mom for a lot of years, and like she got

804
00:38:05,280 --> 00:38:07,799
Speaker 2: sick when I was in college. She went through like

805
00:38:07,920 --> 00:38:11,640
Speaker 2: hell trying to get her uh wrap her you know

806
00:38:11,680 --> 00:38:13,440
Speaker 2: mind around it and figure out what was going on,

807
00:38:13,520 --> 00:38:17,640
Speaker 2: and it like really altered her. And and we've talked

808
00:38:17,640 --> 00:38:20,960
Speaker 2: about it before. But like chronic stress, chronic stress, like

809
00:38:21,239 --> 00:38:24,160
Speaker 2: it can manifest in your body in these ways. It's

810
00:38:24,200 --> 00:38:25,960
Speaker 2: in the back of my mind, you know that that

811
00:38:26,320 --> 00:38:30,480
Speaker 2: years and years of stress and carrying can like you know,

812
00:38:30,800 --> 00:38:32,959
Speaker 2: even if you get through it can still have those

813
00:38:33,000 --> 00:38:34,560
Speaker 2: like long term concepts.

814
00:38:34,760 --> 00:38:37,840
Speaker 1: I don't even know that like, I'm stressed because my partner. Now,

815
00:38:38,760 --> 00:38:41,239
Speaker 1: he was like, he made a joke like me, right,

816
00:38:41,280 --> 00:38:42,920
Speaker 1: he made a joke like you love to stress, you

817
00:38:42,920 --> 00:38:44,239
Speaker 1: love to live in stress to me. I was like, no,

818
00:38:44,239 --> 00:38:46,560
Speaker 1: I have don't wait what because he said again he

819
00:38:46,600 --> 00:38:48,720
Speaker 1: was like he assumed that I knew that I was stressed.

820
00:38:48,760 --> 00:38:52,279
Speaker 1: I'm like I am. And the other day I was

821
00:38:52,320 --> 00:38:54,759
Speaker 1: talking to a friend of mine. Dontec She's like one

822
00:38:54,800 --> 00:38:57,520
Speaker 1: of my business like chat friends, you know, so she

823
00:38:57,560 --> 00:38:59,640
Speaker 1: has own visits. We were talking and I don't know

824
00:38:59,680 --> 00:39:02,799
Speaker 1: what I must have sounded so frustrated and bitter and

825
00:39:03,200 --> 00:39:07,040
Speaker 1: you know, like she was like, are you okay? I

826
00:39:07,080 --> 00:39:10,120
Speaker 1: was like yeah right. She's like, because you're you're putting

827
00:39:10,120 --> 00:39:12,920
Speaker 1: a lot on it, like what's happening is actually not

828
00:39:12,960 --> 00:39:15,000
Speaker 1: as bad because I was complaining about something in business.

829
00:39:15,040 --> 00:39:17,720
Speaker 1: She's like, that actually is not bad, but the way

830
00:39:17,960 --> 00:39:21,440
Speaker 1: you're talking about it is so visceral. Are you okay?

831
00:39:21,600 --> 00:39:26,680
Speaker 1: And I thought, I don't know, Like I had not realized,

832
00:39:27,440 --> 00:39:29,520
Speaker 1: so I don't I'm not sure where this like, you know,

833
00:39:29,600 --> 00:39:32,160
Speaker 1: I'm glad I have therapy in two days. Like where

834
00:39:32,239 --> 00:39:34,960
Speaker 1: this stress is coming from? You know? Something so crazy?

835
00:39:35,000 --> 00:39:37,319
Speaker 1: So mostly I know if we've been listening to Brianna

836
00:39:37,360 --> 00:39:39,680
Speaker 1: Vision for a while that I like, I was struggling

837
00:39:39,680 --> 00:39:42,120
Speaker 1: with like high blood pressure, even though like I had

838
00:39:42,160 --> 00:39:43,640
Speaker 1: like you know, I was eating better, I'd lost we

839
00:39:43,719 --> 00:39:46,239
Speaker 1: at whatever I thought that was a reason. Still blood

840
00:39:46,239 --> 00:39:48,600
Speaker 1: pressure was up and it was clear that it was stress.

841
00:39:49,280 --> 00:39:52,280
Speaker 1: And I'm talking about like one sixty over one hundred.

842
00:39:52,320 --> 00:39:55,640
Speaker 1: I mean, like hi, blood purcher. And but it would

843
00:39:55,640 --> 00:39:57,560
Speaker 1: be crazy because there'd be some days to be one

844
00:39:57,560 --> 00:40:00,239
Speaker 1: twenty over eighty, then one sixty over this, and that's

845
00:40:00,239 --> 00:40:03,840
Speaker 1: when we realize it wasn't necessarily like physically my health,

846
00:40:03,880 --> 00:40:06,560
Speaker 1: but like something external. Yes you know what I mean.

847
00:40:06,680 --> 00:40:10,680
Speaker 1: That was navigating. So when Draw passed away, and I

848
00:40:10,800 --> 00:40:14,000
Speaker 1: was navigating grief like hardcore hardcore. I mean, I'm always

849
00:40:14,000 --> 00:40:17,600
Speaker 1: grieving for the two years, like because now this year

850
00:40:17,640 --> 00:40:20,640
Speaker 1: will be five, which is crazy to think it's been

851
00:40:20,640 --> 00:40:23,120
Speaker 1: five years. But the two years after, my blood pressure

852
00:40:23,200 --> 00:40:27,040
Speaker 1: was like perfect and no spikes, know nothing, And I

853
00:40:27,200 --> 00:40:29,520
Speaker 1: was like, can you imagine, It's like it's almost like

854
00:40:29,600 --> 00:40:31,520
Speaker 1: the grief was like we actually don't have room for

855
00:40:31,560 --> 00:40:33,759
Speaker 1: the other stress that you normally do. We just have

856
00:40:33,880 --> 00:40:37,040
Speaker 1: room for this grief. And so I didn't I didn't stress.

857
00:40:37,120 --> 00:40:40,040
Speaker 1: Nothing matters, right, yes, So I was like, that's when

858
00:40:40,040 --> 00:40:43,640
Speaker 1: I realized. I'm like, oh, this is stress induced blood

859
00:40:43,640 --> 00:40:46,120
Speaker 1: pressure spikes, Tiffany, because literally I didn't care about it.

860
00:40:46,200 --> 00:40:48,239
Speaker 1: Remember may Day, I was like, girl, everything could go.

861
00:40:48,320 --> 00:40:50,840
Speaker 1: I don't care about nothing. This everything to go. I

862
00:40:50,880 --> 00:40:53,200
Speaker 1: don't know, Like the grief was like, yo, we're in

863
00:40:53,280 --> 00:40:56,400
Speaker 1: charge now. And so I released all the other things,

864
00:40:56,840 --> 00:40:59,680
Speaker 1: and slowly but surely I've been picking them back up again.

865
00:41:00,400 --> 00:41:03,839
Speaker 1: And I'm like, Tiffany, now we're back up here. You're

866
00:41:03,880 --> 00:41:07,600
Speaker 1: spiking blood pressure, you haven't getting any additional weight, you're

867
00:41:07,600 --> 00:41:11,560
Speaker 1: not eating different foods, whatever this is. You are causing

868
00:41:11,600 --> 00:41:14,320
Speaker 1: this with the choices you're making about Like even today

869
00:41:14,640 --> 00:41:16,640
Speaker 1: I could have called in, but like, oh, Mandy, like

870
00:41:16,680 --> 00:41:18,600
Speaker 1: I threw my back out, I could barely walk, But

871
00:41:18,640 --> 00:41:20,680
Speaker 1: I was like, I'm gonna just come because my friend.

872
00:41:21,400 --> 00:41:22,440
Speaker 1: Why I'm always.

873
00:41:22,600 --> 00:41:23,920
Speaker 2: Called you this morning because iould have told you to

874
00:41:23,960 --> 00:41:25,880
Speaker 2: stay your ass home. I know, I'm sorry, you know.

875
00:41:25,920 --> 00:41:28,240
Speaker 1: I'm like, I'm martyr. I'm like, why no one's requiring

876
00:41:28,280 --> 00:41:31,080
Speaker 1: this of you? I love to martyr myself. I'm like, no,

877
00:41:31,440 --> 00:41:33,560
Speaker 1: I lost my foot last night, but I would live

878
00:41:33,640 --> 00:41:35,600
Speaker 1: there because I don't know.

879
00:41:35,520 --> 00:41:38,920
Speaker 2: Why that is that annoying thing where you learn lessons

880
00:41:38,920 --> 00:41:41,719
Speaker 2: once and like you put them into effect and then

881
00:41:41,719 --> 00:41:43,600
Speaker 2: it's like a few years later, it's like, God, damn it,

882
00:41:43,640 --> 00:41:46,240
Speaker 2: I forgot that again. It's so annoying.

883
00:41:46,320 --> 00:41:49,120
Speaker 1: It's so annoying, Tiffany, this is your friend Manu.

884
00:41:49,160 --> 00:41:50,319
Speaker 2: A couple of years ago, you would have had no

885
00:41:50,360 --> 00:41:54,080
Speaker 2: problem left, you know, literally like I know I want to.

886
00:41:54,080 --> 00:41:56,000
Speaker 1: Do They literally left the show, but I can't tell Mandy.

887
00:41:56,000 --> 00:41:58,359
Speaker 1: Can we we scheduled Tippy because I can't walk?

888
00:41:58,360 --> 00:42:04,000
Speaker 2: You already broke up with me. No's canceled and I

889
00:42:04,080 --> 00:42:04,600
Speaker 2: just said no.

890
00:42:04,680 --> 00:42:05,960
Speaker 1: But you know what I mean. I was just like,

891
00:42:06,000 --> 00:42:08,080
Speaker 1: I'm so frustrated with myself because I'm just like, Tiffany,

892
00:42:08,400 --> 00:42:09,200
Speaker 1: what does it take?

893
00:42:09,560 --> 00:42:10,320
Speaker 2: You can't walk?

894
00:42:10,880 --> 00:42:12,400
Speaker 1: Like maybe was laughing, I was trying to walk up

895
00:42:12,400 --> 00:42:13,520
Speaker 1: these stairs like that.

896
00:42:13,680 --> 00:42:15,480
Speaker 2: I really feel, you know.

897
00:42:15,680 --> 00:42:18,160
Speaker 1: It's not your fault, it's me. I'm like, so I'm

898
00:42:18,160 --> 00:42:20,319
Speaker 1: still trying to figure out like what is that and

899
00:42:20,360 --> 00:42:24,120
Speaker 1: like what what work needs to be done? Because I

900
00:42:24,160 --> 00:42:26,560
Speaker 1: don't want to be doing that at eighty years old. Yeah,

901
00:42:26,600 --> 00:42:28,160
Speaker 1: you know what I mean. I don't want to be

902
00:42:28,239 --> 00:42:30,759
Speaker 1: Martyring myself. And what's so crazy is that no one's

903
00:42:30,840 --> 00:42:33,279
Speaker 1: requesting that. It'd be one thing if I had like

904
00:42:33,320 --> 00:42:36,279
Speaker 1: demanding family and friends and everyone's no. Everyone's always like

905
00:42:36,320 --> 00:42:39,040
Speaker 1: I didn't ask for that. That's how you says like

906
00:42:39,960 --> 00:42:41,480
Speaker 1: I didn't request that. I didn't ask for that.

907
00:42:42,719 --> 00:42:45,160
Speaker 2: I'm only laughing because I had one of those nights

908
00:42:45,200 --> 00:42:48,480
Speaker 2: as a mom last night that I'm like, I did

909
00:42:48,480 --> 00:42:51,239
Speaker 2: it to myself. I decided to make like a really

910
00:42:51,239 --> 00:42:54,080
Speaker 2: good dinner. I roasted a whole chicken, just want a

911
00:42:54,160 --> 00:42:56,600
Speaker 2: random money roasted chicken. I made like a little sauce,

912
00:42:56,719 --> 00:42:58,839
Speaker 2: and I made baked potatoes, and my six year old

913
00:42:58,880 --> 00:43:02,040
Speaker 2: Rio was helping me rice and like broccoli and all

914
00:43:02,040 --> 00:43:04,200
Speaker 2: this stuff, and you know, I sit down and make

915
00:43:04,239 --> 00:43:06,320
Speaker 2: it and then I'm but I'm like getting increasingly stressed

916
00:43:06,360 --> 00:43:09,200
Speaker 2: about eating on time, and I gotta go pick up

917
00:43:09,280 --> 00:43:11,040
Speaker 2: you know, husband from the train and pick the baby

918
00:43:11,120 --> 00:43:13,759
Speaker 2: up from daycare and get home. And I'm like this

919
00:43:13,800 --> 00:43:15,879
Speaker 2: new bedtime routine I'm trying to put in place, and

920
00:43:15,960 --> 00:43:17,920
Speaker 2: like we have to eat a six, like six is

921
00:43:17,920 --> 00:43:20,879
Speaker 2: the time, and the kids are pissed, like they don't

922
00:43:20,880 --> 00:43:22,920
Speaker 2: want to eat right now. They just settled in for

923
00:43:22,960 --> 00:43:27,000
Speaker 2: a little pop patrol, you know, like and I'm getting mad,

924
00:43:27,040 --> 00:43:29,960
Speaker 2: and like dinner is a fiasco, Like kids are screaming,

925
00:43:30,400 --> 00:43:37,280
Speaker 2: not running down, tablets are taken away, threats are being made.

926
00:43:40,280 --> 00:43:42,959
Speaker 2: We're sitting at this little table and I observed the meal.

927
00:43:43,440 --> 00:43:46,520
Speaker 2: I don't like potato, the potato that he helped me make.

928
00:43:48,239 --> 00:43:51,319
Speaker 2: Remy's not hungry. They found that they found a rogue

929
00:43:51,320 --> 00:43:53,520
Speaker 2: bottle of ginger railes, so they're filling up on soda

930
00:43:53,680 --> 00:43:57,440
Speaker 2: that I can't. It's just and it was a complete

931
00:43:57,480 --> 00:43:59,799
Speaker 2: disaster and I just want my head's in my head

932
00:43:59,800 --> 00:44:02,239
Speaker 2: and hand and I was like I don't know what

933
00:44:02,280 --> 00:44:04,720
Speaker 2: my life has become. And I'm and I'm like suffering,

934
00:44:04,719 --> 00:44:07,080
Speaker 2: and then of course I'm like I just need to

935
00:44:07,080 --> 00:44:09,000
Speaker 2: go to bed and get over this. And this morning,

936
00:44:09,040 --> 00:44:12,560
Speaker 2: I'm like, that could have probably been prevented if you

937
00:44:12,680 --> 00:44:15,560
Speaker 2: hadn't put so much pressure and like had this And

938
00:44:15,680 --> 00:44:19,800
Speaker 2: that's definitely a lesson that I've had to learn. Forget,

939
00:44:20,280 --> 00:44:22,440
Speaker 2: Learn forget, learn, forget.

940
00:44:22,640 --> 00:44:25,799
Speaker 1: It's like who said that, you know what I mean?

941
00:44:25,840 --> 00:44:27,920
Speaker 1: It's like because we'll have it, like it has to

942
00:44:28,000 --> 00:44:30,120
Speaker 1: be this way, but like literally who said that?

943
00:44:30,520 --> 00:44:31,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, you know what I mean?

944
00:44:31,960 --> 00:44:35,520
Speaker 1: Like especially when no one around you, because you know,

945
00:44:35,640 --> 00:44:38,319
Speaker 1: like it's not like your kids were like if you

946
00:44:38,360 --> 00:44:41,239
Speaker 1: don't make roast chicken or baked potatoes tonight, I would

947
00:44:41,280 --> 00:44:41,680
Speaker 1: never eat it.

948
00:44:41,640 --> 00:44:43,480
Speaker 2: It would have been happy, you know. They were even

949
00:44:43,560 --> 00:44:46,600
Speaker 2: happy with a bag of chips and little orange juice

950
00:44:46,640 --> 00:44:51,160
Speaker 2: like or a hot dog. Yes, it induced, it's self induced.

951
00:44:51,160 --> 00:44:53,040
Speaker 2: And also but my reaction to it the way that

952
00:44:53,080 --> 00:44:56,920
Speaker 2: I was, I struggled to regulate myself. Yeah, I shut down,

953
00:44:57,440 --> 00:44:58,960
Speaker 2: you know, and I don't like that. It's either I'm

954
00:44:58,960 --> 00:45:01,480
Speaker 2: going to blow up or I'm going to be completely

955
00:45:01,520 --> 00:45:04,840
Speaker 2: silent and not move or say anything, which neither of

956
00:45:04,880 --> 00:45:07,520
Speaker 2: those is really healthy for a kid. My six year

957
00:45:07,520 --> 00:45:12,560
Speaker 2: old's like, Mommy, like, I can't answer you because I

958
00:45:12,719 --> 00:45:15,959
Speaker 2: will blow up. And that was a and those moments

959
00:45:16,000 --> 00:45:18,360
Speaker 2: have been happening and happening, and like I'm really struggling

960
00:45:18,360 --> 00:45:22,840
Speaker 2: to regulate and so that for me is the bad fine,

961
00:45:23,360 --> 00:45:25,719
Speaker 2: and so I'm like, all right, let me pull out

962
00:45:25,760 --> 00:45:29,400
Speaker 2: my uh pull out my work book on dialectical behavioral

963
00:45:29,440 --> 00:45:32,759
Speaker 2: therapy and like regulating. But it's it's that, uh, I

964
00:45:32,800 --> 00:45:36,200
Speaker 2: think knowing the damage that that stress on the body

965
00:45:36,360 --> 00:45:40,239
Speaker 2: can cause is like the first step. Now it's like

966
00:45:40,480 --> 00:45:47,200
Speaker 2: what are the triggers? And unknowingly it's often this like

967
00:45:47,800 --> 00:45:50,200
Speaker 2: how do we change what's happening here so that we're

968
00:45:50,200 --> 00:45:55,800
Speaker 2: suffering you know less? And I just think sometimes the choice,

969
00:45:55,840 --> 00:45:59,840
Speaker 2: like the decisions that are required to remove those stressors

970
00:46:00,280 --> 00:46:01,839
Speaker 2: when you're at this stage in ARC, Like I mean,

971
00:46:01,920 --> 00:46:04,920
Speaker 2: I know you're more advanced and like older and more seasons.

972
00:46:05,640 --> 00:46:06,120
Speaker 1: Don't do that.

973
00:46:08,440 --> 00:46:12,120
Speaker 2: Got big business people relying on you. Those those decisions

974
00:46:12,160 --> 00:46:13,640
Speaker 2: are just not easy ones.

975
00:46:14,440 --> 00:46:17,480
Speaker 1: And you know it's so crazy that like they're not.

976
00:46:17,800 --> 00:46:20,239
Speaker 1: Like before I have a coo shout out to the vetch.

977
00:46:20,280 --> 00:46:22,880
Speaker 1: He's amazing, he's taken. I used to be ninety percent

978
00:46:22,880 --> 00:46:25,759
Speaker 1: tiphany and now it's thirty maybe of like to city.

979
00:46:25,840 --> 00:46:27,759
Speaker 1: So I'm just like, well, you're actually not, Like this

980
00:46:27,840 --> 00:46:30,319
Speaker 1: is the only thing I have today, Like yesterday we

981
00:46:30,400 --> 00:46:31,960
Speaker 1: had a team meeting and that was about it. Like

982
00:46:32,000 --> 00:46:35,680
Speaker 1: my schedule is clear than it's been. So a lot

983
00:46:35,680 --> 00:46:38,359
Speaker 1: of it is like I am I created the space

984
00:46:38,400 --> 00:46:39,960
Speaker 1: I said I need it, and the piece I said

985
00:46:39,960 --> 00:46:42,480
Speaker 1: I needed and all the things and even that's where

986
00:46:42,520 --> 00:46:46,920
Speaker 1: I left brown ambition and instead of like rolling around

987
00:46:47,120 --> 00:46:50,840
Speaker 1: in the space I credit I'm created for myself to

988
00:46:50,880 --> 00:46:53,640
Speaker 1: have some peace. I'm so used to the dysfunction. I'm like, oh,

989
00:46:53,680 --> 00:46:56,319
Speaker 1: let me add some spice. What can I do to

990
00:46:56,360 --> 00:46:59,000
Speaker 1: create some stretch for that, you know what I mean?

991
00:46:59,040 --> 00:47:02,640
Speaker 2: And it's so it's like over scheduling yourself or no,

992
00:47:02,840 --> 00:47:05,719
Speaker 2: just like so many things. Yes, oh, just adding I've

993
00:47:05,719 --> 00:47:06,800
Speaker 2: been traveling a lot lately.

994
00:47:07,120 --> 00:47:09,200
Speaker 1: Well yeah that December, but no, like honestly, I don't

995
00:47:09,239 --> 00:47:12,879
Speaker 1: have no place to go in February or really even

996
00:47:13,320 --> 00:47:15,600
Speaker 1: a bunch next month. But like, I'll give you an example.

997
00:47:15,640 --> 00:47:18,160
Speaker 1: So I I own my condor I purchased after Draw

998
00:47:18,200 --> 00:47:22,120
Speaker 1: passed away. My sister Carol and her kids live in

999
00:47:22,200 --> 00:47:24,360
Speaker 1: the house to Draw, and I had renovated and we

1000
00:47:24,440 --> 00:47:26,359
Speaker 1: kind of he and I always had that thought that

1001
00:47:26,600 --> 00:47:28,640
Speaker 1: Alyssa would go off the college, Caroll and the kids

1002
00:47:28,640 --> 00:47:30,600
Speaker 1: could live there because they lived around the corner in

1003
00:47:30,600 --> 00:47:33,680
Speaker 1: a smaller apartment, and then we would get something else,

1004
00:47:33,760 --> 00:47:37,200
Speaker 1: you know, And so that happened, and now everything was good.

1005
00:47:37,400 --> 00:47:40,239
Speaker 1: But then on the unit came up my building and I.

1006
00:47:40,239 --> 00:47:42,320
Speaker 2: Was like, you came on the show to talk about it.

1007
00:47:42,360 --> 00:47:44,000
Speaker 1: Yes, I was like, let me buy it. And then

1008
00:47:44,040 --> 00:47:46,000
Speaker 1: this other unit came up something let me buy it.

1009
00:47:46,239 --> 00:47:49,560
Speaker 1: So now I have four properties. Nobody asked for nobody,

1010
00:47:49,800 --> 00:47:53,160
Speaker 1: you bought two properties. So now when my tax.

1011
00:47:53,040 --> 00:47:55,799
Speaker 2: Is that an Instagram story You're winning, You're rich. It

1012
00:47:55,840 --> 00:47:57,919
Speaker 2: sounds like that's the dream. Until it's time to beate

1013
00:47:58,120 --> 00:48:01,720
Speaker 2: my quarterly taxes. I'm like, oh, okay, nine thousand dollars.

1014
00:48:03,719 --> 00:48:06,239
Speaker 2: Oh insurance, okay, six thousand dollars because I have the

1015
00:48:06,239 --> 00:48:09,320
Speaker 2: four you know, okay, I'm renovating.

1016
00:48:09,360 --> 00:48:12,279
Speaker 1: Now it's a six figure renovation. So where my you

1017
00:48:12,320 --> 00:48:15,160
Speaker 1: know me, I'm the budgetista for real. My overhead was like, girl,

1018
00:48:15,160 --> 00:48:16,560
Speaker 1: what do I have to pay for it? Because both

1019
00:48:16,600 --> 00:48:19,520
Speaker 1: houses were paid off? Not these because I took that

1020
00:48:19,600 --> 00:48:21,839
Speaker 1: remember that? Oh what did I call it?

1021
00:48:21,840 --> 00:48:24,960
Speaker 2: Not that you came on with Angelia to talk about it?

1022
00:48:25,080 --> 00:48:30,120
Speaker 1: Yeah, like the pledge, yeah, pledge that life, yes, pledge.

1023
00:48:30,640 --> 00:48:32,799
Speaker 1: So now, but so now that's an addition of three

1024
00:48:32,800 --> 00:48:35,840
Speaker 1: thousand dollars a month, Like what the actual hell? No

1025
00:48:35,880 --> 00:48:37,839
Speaker 1: one asked me. I was like, oh, my other two

1026
00:48:37,920 --> 00:48:40,200
Speaker 1: sisters can live in it. Did they say, hey, girl,

1027
00:48:40,520 --> 00:48:42,520
Speaker 1: love you bought me a kind of nobody requested that,

1028
00:48:42,800 --> 00:48:45,440
Speaker 1: and then the one above me for Melyssa. But we

1029
00:48:45,520 --> 00:48:48,680
Speaker 1: sold because draw and I had two homes when we

1030
00:48:48,719 --> 00:48:50,759
Speaker 1: got for the city, I sold one of them to

1031
00:48:50,880 --> 00:48:54,360
Speaker 1: Terren took that money and it's been invested for Alyssa.

1032
00:48:54,480 --> 00:48:58,560
Speaker 1: That's her house money, and so she didn't need another.

1033
00:48:59,239 --> 00:49:03,200
Speaker 1: What am I So it's no one is requested, No

1034
00:49:03,239 --> 00:49:06,600
Speaker 1: one is. It's like I it's like, you don't like peace,

1035
00:49:07,480 --> 00:49:11,600
Speaker 1: you like problems. Problem because literally I'm not gonna lie.

1036
00:49:11,600 --> 00:49:13,360
Speaker 1: I'm stressed because I'm just like, look at all my

1037
00:49:13,680 --> 00:49:18,960
Speaker 1: like financial output and before I like my if I

1038
00:49:19,040 --> 00:49:21,239
Speaker 1: had to go back to being a preschool teacher and

1039
00:49:21,719 --> 00:49:23,759
Speaker 1: by this, you know, I would have had maybe might

1040
00:49:23,880 --> 00:49:26,920
Speaker 1: might not be making like eighty or ninety thousand dollars

1041
00:49:26,960 --> 00:49:28,560
Speaker 1: a year just because of how many years in I

1042
00:49:28,560 --> 00:49:32,279
Speaker 1: have my master's. I could have supported my life on that,

1043
00:49:32,800 --> 00:49:33,399
Speaker 1: you know what I mean.

1044
00:49:33,560 --> 00:49:36,279
Speaker 2: Now, it's like, girl, you always spoke about that with

1045
00:49:36,400 --> 00:49:38,200
Speaker 2: pride too, like that was your happy place.

1046
00:49:38,600 --> 00:49:40,719
Speaker 1: So I'm apparent I don't happy. Must not be something

1047
00:49:40,719 --> 00:49:44,200
Speaker 1: I enjoy because I'm mean now I'm like so now now.

1048
00:49:44,160 --> 00:49:47,279
Speaker 2: I mean, like you, being debt free and having a

1049
00:49:47,280 --> 00:49:49,759
Speaker 2: low cost of wing was always That's not where I

1050
00:49:49,760 --> 00:49:51,680
Speaker 2: am anymore, you know. Yeah, it just made them not

1051
00:49:51,840 --> 00:49:54,719
Speaker 2: so funny because I expected your source of stress to

1052
00:49:54,760 --> 00:49:58,640
Speaker 2: be so much better than mine. God, mine's money too,

1053
00:50:00,040 --> 00:50:01,640
Speaker 2: of course, like business is a little slower.

1054
00:50:02,120 --> 00:50:05,759
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, this is a little slower things. And I'm

1055
00:50:05,800 --> 00:50:09,040
Speaker 1: just like, why would you do this? No one requested this, Tiffany,

1056
00:50:09,320 --> 00:50:10,799
Speaker 1: you had finally got to a place. I'm like, look

1057
00:50:10,800 --> 00:50:14,920
Speaker 1: at my life. It's like, what is that that that

1058
00:50:15,040 --> 00:50:19,160
Speaker 1: show with Neo Matrix? And so in the beginning, you

1059
00:50:19,200 --> 00:50:24,759
Speaker 1: know how like so like in the Matrix, you know,

1060
00:50:24,840 --> 00:50:27,840
Speaker 1: like human beings essentially were like batteries for like the

1061
00:50:29,120 --> 00:50:30,040
Speaker 1: alien computers.

1062
00:50:30,120 --> 00:50:32,360
Speaker 2: Right, I don't quite know what the movies that was.

1063
00:50:32,360 --> 00:50:34,360
Speaker 1: Basically like it's like they use human beings. There's batteries

1064
00:50:34,360 --> 00:50:37,279
Speaker 1: for like alien computers. Right. So in the beginning, they

1065
00:50:37,440 --> 00:50:39,520
Speaker 1: used to make they would make everything perfect so the

1066
00:50:39,600 --> 00:50:42,920
Speaker 1: human beings can be happy, generate this electric energy, and

1067
00:50:42,960 --> 00:50:45,160
Speaker 1: then they would suck out that energy. But they realized

1068
00:50:45,200 --> 00:50:47,680
Speaker 1: human beings don't what peace and happiness, so they had

1069
00:50:47,719 --> 00:50:51,319
Speaker 1: to create this dystopian world just for us to feel normalized.

1070
00:50:51,560 --> 00:50:53,239
Speaker 1: And they would just so that's what I feel like.

1071
00:50:53,239 --> 00:50:55,839
Speaker 1: I'm like, you don't why don't you like the piece

1072
00:50:55,840 --> 00:50:57,839
Speaker 1: and happiness you created for yourself? I looked around. I

1073
00:50:57,880 --> 00:51:00,719
Speaker 1: was like, things are real quiet. You know what. I

1074
00:51:00,880 --> 00:51:03,919
Speaker 1: like more bills, you know, I like a little more stress,

1075
00:51:04,160 --> 00:51:05,399
Speaker 1: a little more anxiety.

1076
00:51:06,120 --> 00:51:10,960
Speaker 2: I'm like, I don't know, olkba fans stay right there,

1077
00:51:11,040 --> 00:51:13,560
Speaker 2: will be back with more. With my conversation with Tiffany

1078
00:51:13,640 --> 00:51:17,799
Speaker 2: right after this. You're in the thick of it, and

1079
00:51:17,880 --> 00:51:20,719
Speaker 2: I'm in the thick of my choices too, and I

1080
00:51:20,800 --> 00:51:24,480
Speaker 2: think sometimes I'm like, well, at the time it felt.

1081
00:51:24,200 --> 00:51:27,000
Speaker 1: Like the right thing, yeah, because I'm like, it's a

1082
00:51:27,000 --> 00:51:28,720
Speaker 1: good thing. I'm like, oh, I'm like again, this property.

1083
00:51:28,760 --> 00:51:31,160
Speaker 1: My sisters will live here, Alista will live here. But

1084
00:51:31,239 --> 00:51:35,200
Speaker 1: you know, what I've learned is that when you are

1085
00:51:35,480 --> 00:51:38,840
Speaker 1: not self regulating your own emotions, then you seek to

1086
00:51:38,840 --> 00:51:43,600
Speaker 1: control others because if I can fix you, then I

1087
00:51:43,640 --> 00:51:46,880
Speaker 1: can feel better, versus just working on feeling better, and

1088
00:51:46,920 --> 00:51:49,279
Speaker 1: so me purchasing this property so you could be good

1089
00:51:49,280 --> 00:51:51,279
Speaker 1: in this and I could do it. And so that

1090
00:51:51,440 --> 00:51:55,560
Speaker 1: is my way of avoiding like regulating my own whatever

1091
00:51:55,600 --> 00:51:58,439
Speaker 1: that is. It is like, let me fix everyone else's life.

1092
00:51:58,480 --> 00:52:01,360
Speaker 2: It's really rude of you to attack me this way,

1093
00:52:01,880 --> 00:52:03,960
Speaker 2: because I can't think of a better analogy for having

1094
00:52:04,040 --> 00:52:08,319
Speaker 2: kids right now. I mean, I had the worst days sometimes,

1095
00:52:08,800 --> 00:52:11,840
Speaker 2: but you know, I made that freaking dinner because I

1096
00:52:11,880 --> 00:52:14,680
Speaker 2: had a terrible day yesterday and I felt like nothing

1097
00:52:14,760 --> 00:52:17,560
Speaker 2: I was doing was like going well work wise, and

1098
00:52:17,640 --> 00:52:19,560
Speaker 2: I was like, well, I can do this. And so

1099
00:52:19,640 --> 00:52:22,080
Speaker 2: when I failed at it, when the kids were like

1100
00:52:22,120 --> 00:52:25,000
Speaker 2: I don't want them and husband's like, oh, you know,

1101
00:52:25,280 --> 00:52:29,520
Speaker 2: this sauce isn't salty enough or whatever, I like, I broke, you.

1102
00:52:29,480 --> 00:52:34,880
Speaker 1: Know, And because you're funlowing your instead of navigating that

1103
00:52:34,960 --> 00:52:37,840
Speaker 1: internal It's like, if I can do these external things,

1104
00:52:38,320 --> 00:52:39,520
Speaker 1: if that goes well, I'm.

1105
00:52:39,520 --> 00:52:41,920
Speaker 2: For this laptop at the wall. I'm so annoyed that

1106
00:52:41,960 --> 00:52:43,360
Speaker 2: we're going there.

1107
00:52:43,760 --> 00:52:45,719
Speaker 1: But it's true. And I realized, I'm like, oh, that's

1108
00:52:45,719 --> 00:52:47,279
Speaker 1: what we were trying to do instead of dealing with

1109
00:52:47,320 --> 00:52:49,200
Speaker 1: whatever you had to deal with tipy it likely was

1110
00:52:49,600 --> 00:52:51,200
Speaker 1: a grief book and all these other things. I'm like,

1111
00:52:51,239 --> 00:52:54,840
Speaker 1: you know what, let's invent problems in truggle so I

1112
00:52:54,880 --> 00:52:57,799
Speaker 1: can fix those. Instead of fixing whatever, It's like, I'm

1113
00:52:57,840 --> 00:53:02,200
Speaker 1: navigating internally, so now I got to both. Yay, you

1114
00:53:02,239 --> 00:53:04,840
Speaker 1: know what it's akin to. It's like doing a balanced

1115
00:53:04,840 --> 00:53:09,120
Speaker 1: transfer card and then running up the old card. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah,

1116
00:53:09,480 --> 00:53:10,719
Speaker 1: you know what I mean, it's like, you know what,

1117
00:53:10,719 --> 00:53:12,640
Speaker 1: I'm gonna fix my life. I'm gonna trance my balance

1118
00:53:12,640 --> 00:53:15,319
Speaker 1: to this new card, and then you don't close close

1119
00:53:15,360 --> 00:53:17,560
Speaker 1: out the old one, and now you have double debt.

1120
00:53:17,840 --> 00:53:20,520
Speaker 1: And so that's essentially like when you don't work on

1121
00:53:20,560 --> 00:53:25,120
Speaker 1: yourself internally and you take on external responsibilities, you've literally

1122
00:53:25,160 --> 00:53:27,799
Speaker 1: just created double debt for yourself and now you are

1123
00:53:27,880 --> 00:53:30,360
Speaker 1: drowning for real, not for faith like you thought before.

1124
00:53:31,200 --> 00:53:35,440
Speaker 1: So yeah, we're hearing that head Nick, ain't no.

1125
00:53:35,520 --> 00:53:43,680
Speaker 2: Sea always so relaxing. But this is the real I think,

1126
00:53:43,680 --> 00:53:46,840
Speaker 2: And I just I can't think of a more universal

1127
00:53:46,840 --> 00:53:48,839
Speaker 2: experience what we're talking about. And I know people are

1128
00:53:48,840 --> 00:53:51,399
Speaker 2: listening right now, ba fam who are in their car

1129
00:53:51,640 --> 00:53:53,480
Speaker 2: or at the gym or wherever you are listening to

1130
00:53:53,520 --> 00:53:57,200
Speaker 2: this and are like really pissed at us too, Yes,

1131
00:53:57,320 --> 00:53:58,880
Speaker 2: for making you think about the thing that you have

1132
00:53:58,960 --> 00:54:00,759
Speaker 2: been shoving to the side.

1133
00:54:01,000 --> 00:54:01,239
Speaker 1: Yeah.

1134
00:54:01,280 --> 00:54:03,719
Speaker 2: And it's like, so, what's the answer. Do I just

1135
00:54:04,000 --> 00:54:06,440
Speaker 2: send the kids away for six months? I can figure

1136
00:54:06,440 --> 00:54:08,359
Speaker 2: out like all this shit. It's really hard to do

1137
00:54:08,400 --> 00:54:11,600
Speaker 2: it when there's like real people relying on you in

1138
00:54:11,640 --> 00:54:14,000
Speaker 2: the moment, and it's that constant challenge of like when

1139
00:54:14,000 --> 00:54:15,799
Speaker 2: do I carve out the space to fix this? And

1140
00:54:15,800 --> 00:54:18,600
Speaker 2: by the way, it's like trying to move a container ship.

1141
00:54:18,600 --> 00:54:21,000
Speaker 2: We're not trying to move like a speedboat. Like it

1142
00:54:21,080 --> 00:54:24,279
Speaker 2: takes so much time sometimes to write what can be

1143
00:54:24,320 --> 00:54:28,160
Speaker 2: wrong internally? I think, I.

1144
00:54:28,120 --> 00:54:30,960
Speaker 1: Think, I think the and you know, certainly, I'll check

1145
00:54:30,960 --> 00:54:32,800
Speaker 1: back with you when I talked to doctor Green on Wednesday.

1146
00:54:33,200 --> 00:54:36,080
Speaker 1: But what she has in me do is one name

1147
00:54:36,160 --> 00:54:38,919
Speaker 1: the thing, like not the external thing, but like what's

1148
00:54:39,000 --> 00:54:41,080
Speaker 1: actually happening. Because I'll say I don't know what's wrong.

1149
00:54:41,080 --> 00:54:43,040
Speaker 1: She's like, Okay, let's figure it out. I'm like, wait now,

1150
00:54:45,080 --> 00:54:47,680
Speaker 1: she's like, where do you feel it? You're testing, you're backing,

1151
00:54:47,719 --> 00:54:51,000
Speaker 1: you're this, you'ar that, and naming what's wrong and then

1152
00:54:51,120 --> 00:54:54,799
Speaker 1: asking like really digging, digging, digging, meaning focusing on the

1153
00:54:54,840 --> 00:55:00,000
Speaker 1: actual thing that's wrong, versus trying to find this external distract.

1154
00:55:00,880 --> 00:55:03,640
Speaker 1: And so I think that that's really I mean, that's

1155
00:55:03,680 --> 00:55:08,279
Speaker 1: that's the work, which is like figuring out, Okay, you're

1156
00:55:08,320 --> 00:55:12,080
Speaker 1: about to embark upon this thing. Wait, what's actually happening

1157
00:55:12,120 --> 00:55:15,200
Speaker 1: with you? Like you know what I mean? Like why

1158
00:55:16,160 --> 00:55:18,719
Speaker 1: if no one's asked? Like I'm learning to see like

1159
00:55:19,320 --> 00:55:22,160
Speaker 1: my patterns. When I take on a thing that a

1160
00:55:22,200 --> 00:55:24,960
Speaker 1: burden that no one's asked, that's a that's a clear

1161
00:55:25,120 --> 00:55:27,399
Speaker 1: indicator for me because I'm like to mean no one

1162
00:55:27,680 --> 00:55:29,360
Speaker 1: like literally, my sisters weren't like, you know what, I

1163
00:55:29,400 --> 00:55:31,839
Speaker 1: would love us watas of condo? Why why did I?

1164
00:55:31,880 --> 00:55:34,680
Speaker 1: Why why would I? You know what I mean? Like, so,

1165
00:55:35,400 --> 00:55:37,839
Speaker 1: what's happening there that made me say, let me go

1166
00:55:37,880 --> 00:55:40,120
Speaker 1: do a thing that's big that no one asked for.

1167
00:55:40,360 --> 00:55:42,919
Speaker 1: So that's a trigger for me to be like, Ooh,

1168
00:55:43,040 --> 00:55:46,839
Speaker 1: something's happening before you sign for that condo. Let's maybe

1169
00:55:46,880 --> 00:55:48,880
Speaker 1: need to talk to doctor Green and say something's happening

1170
00:55:48,920 --> 00:55:51,400
Speaker 1: because I noticed I wanted to take an additional burden

1171
00:55:51,440 --> 00:55:54,920
Speaker 1: that nobody requested. You know, I was talking to Alissa

1172
00:55:55,000 --> 00:55:56,320
Speaker 1: the other day and she would.

1173
00:55:56,080 --> 00:55:58,160
Speaker 2: Be really useful if I hadn't fired my therapist to

1174
00:55:58,160 --> 00:55:59,439
Speaker 2: see a few months ago.

1175
00:55:59,520 --> 00:56:00,520
Speaker 1: So you haven't one.

1176
00:56:00,840 --> 00:56:05,680
Speaker 2: No, I went through like four therapists last year. I

1177
00:56:05,840 --> 00:56:11,360
Speaker 2: just got really frustrated by the I don't know, I

1178
00:56:11,640 --> 00:56:13,080
Speaker 2: don't want to go I don't really want to talk

1179
00:56:13,120 --> 00:56:15,640
Speaker 2: about it now on the show. But yeah, yeah, I'm

1180
00:56:15,719 --> 00:56:17,719
Speaker 2: still like on that journey trying to find it the

1181
00:56:17,800 --> 00:56:19,839
Speaker 2: right fit. I had the right fit for five years.

1182
00:56:20,160 --> 00:56:22,399
Speaker 2: It was great. And I thought, you know, when when

1183
00:56:22,440 --> 00:56:24,960
Speaker 2: she had gone back to my old the former therapist,

1184
00:56:25,040 --> 00:56:28,600
Speaker 2: like went to a hospital to work full time, and

1185
00:56:28,640 --> 00:56:30,719
Speaker 2: I just thought, well, I'll just find another one. I

1186
00:56:30,719 --> 00:56:32,919
Speaker 2: have so much empathy for those of us out here

1187
00:56:32,960 --> 00:56:36,279
Speaker 2: trying to find the right fit. Never doctor Green, never

1188
00:56:36,360 --> 00:56:36,759
Speaker 2: let her go.

1189
00:56:36,920 --> 00:56:39,279
Speaker 1: I know. I mean I know because honestly because before

1190
00:56:39,280 --> 00:56:42,160
Speaker 1: doctor Green, I had been looking for a couple of years. Yeah,

1191
00:56:42,200 --> 00:56:44,040
Speaker 1: and to find her, I'm like, oh my god, I'm

1192
00:56:44,040 --> 00:56:45,759
Speaker 1: so glad. I'm like, doctor Gleen, you look young, you

1193
00:56:45,800 --> 00:56:47,680
Speaker 1: look relative and good health. Please.

1194
00:56:49,160 --> 00:56:52,520
Speaker 2: Yeah. Honestly it's hard, yeah, but it's and it's just

1195
00:56:52,880 --> 00:56:56,160
Speaker 2: you know, so I think, just it's another reminder, well

1196
00:56:56,160 --> 00:57:00,680
Speaker 2: God nod, Tiffany nod. Yeah, to go.

1197
00:57:00,600 --> 00:57:03,280
Speaker 1: Back to that, try to get that together, and honestly

1198
00:57:03,400 --> 00:57:05,960
Speaker 1: just knowing, like I was telling Alyssa that because she

1199
00:57:06,000 --> 00:57:09,239
Speaker 1: was asking me about how does she succeed and you know,

1200
00:57:09,280 --> 00:57:11,040
Speaker 1: she's nineteen, so she's starting to think about her future

1201
00:57:11,080 --> 00:57:13,360
Speaker 1: and things and getting things done. She moved back in

1202
00:57:13,400 --> 00:57:14,799
Speaker 1: with me, which I'm so happy because she was like,

1203
00:57:14,960 --> 00:57:17,040
Speaker 1: I don't like burning shower shoes. I was like, she's

1204
00:57:17,080 --> 00:57:19,720
Speaker 1: going on campus. I was like, girl bringing on shock,

1205
00:57:19,880 --> 00:57:21,720
Speaker 1: not shocker, I know, because you know she's the only

1206
00:57:21,800 --> 00:57:22,880
Speaker 1: child rich.

1207
00:57:24,280 --> 00:57:24,720
Speaker 2: To live with.

1208
00:57:24,960 --> 00:57:29,160
Speaker 1: Yes, okay, And so I was telling her that the

1209
00:57:29,200 --> 00:57:31,880
Speaker 1: best thing she can do is become an expert in herself,

1210
00:57:32,680 --> 00:57:35,760
Speaker 1: you know that. Like to understand, Like I told her,

1211
00:57:35,800 --> 00:57:37,160
Speaker 1: I was like, I learned a long time ago, I'm

1212
00:57:37,160 --> 00:57:38,840
Speaker 1: a morning person. So if I want to get something

1213
00:57:38,880 --> 00:57:40,920
Speaker 1: done that's important, do a first thing in the morning.

1214
00:57:41,400 --> 00:57:43,360
Speaker 1: I learned that, Like I'm a people person, So I

1215
00:57:43,400 --> 00:57:46,400
Speaker 1: built a business around my personality. I said, So as

1216
00:57:46,400 --> 00:57:48,720
Speaker 1: you get to know yourself, then you can create an

1217
00:57:48,800 --> 00:57:52,000
Speaker 1: environment where you're you know, where you're conducive to, like

1218
00:57:52,080 --> 00:57:54,880
Speaker 1: to winning for yourself. So even me knowing my triggers,

1219
00:57:54,960 --> 00:57:57,400
Speaker 1: like oh, tif you're taking on ad digital bursion no

1220
00:57:57,440 --> 00:57:59,200
Speaker 1: one asked for. That's one of your things that you

1221
00:57:59,280 --> 00:58:02,560
Speaker 1: do when something is happening or like you've numbed out

1222
00:58:02,760 --> 00:58:05,600
Speaker 1: something terrible has happened and you feel nothing. That's another

1223
00:58:05,720 --> 00:58:07,560
Speaker 1: like indicated for me where I'm like, wait a minute,

1224
00:58:08,000 --> 00:58:11,600
Speaker 1: why don't I feel anything? Oh? You have? I do

1225
00:58:11,680 --> 00:58:14,600
Speaker 1: this thing where I disassociate when I'm feeling overwhelmed. Okay,

1226
00:58:15,200 --> 00:58:17,440
Speaker 1: what's the last time you even cried? I'm like, okay,

1227
00:58:17,520 --> 00:58:20,240
Speaker 1: So the better I get to know myself, the more

1228
00:58:20,280 --> 00:58:23,080
Speaker 1: I'm like, Oh, it doesn't obviously make for perfect I'm

1229
00:58:23,080 --> 00:58:24,520
Speaker 1: not because here I am, you know, with all this

1230
00:58:24,600 --> 00:58:27,560
Speaker 1: new debt and stuff, I'm been overwhelmed by it. But

1231
00:58:27,680 --> 00:58:31,680
Speaker 1: at least I know now, like, oh, that's a trigger. Okay,

1232
00:58:31,960 --> 00:58:34,480
Speaker 1: so when it comes up, I can I can maybe

1233
00:58:34,520 --> 00:58:37,720
Speaker 1: pause for a moment and say, before you take that action,

1234
00:58:38,360 --> 00:58:41,320
Speaker 1: let's figure out what's happening internally, and maybe let's ask

1235
00:58:41,320 --> 00:58:44,400
Speaker 1: for some help, you know. So yeah, just knowing ourselves,

1236
00:58:44,400 --> 00:58:45,920
Speaker 1: that's all you can do. I mean, we're gonna be

1237
00:58:46,000 --> 00:58:48,280
Speaker 1: ninety years old still on some bullshit, I know. I

1238
00:58:48,320 --> 00:58:49,560
Speaker 1: am the.

1239
00:58:49,520 --> 00:58:51,680
Speaker 2: Amount of grace I think we have to give ourselves

1240
00:58:51,720 --> 00:58:55,520
Speaker 2: for having to relearn the lessons. And I mean even

1241
00:58:55,720 --> 00:58:57,760
Speaker 2: like with you and the condos and the debt and

1242
00:58:57,800 --> 00:59:01,000
Speaker 2: the the additional expenses of that, expenses of that, and

1243
00:59:01,040 --> 00:59:04,040
Speaker 2: then me with the business and you know, really investing

1244
00:59:04,080 --> 00:59:06,440
Speaker 2: in myself and also dealing with the ups and downs

1245
00:59:06,440 --> 00:59:10,680
Speaker 2: of entrepreneurship, inconsistent income and all that and making those

1246
00:59:10,760 --> 00:59:14,080
Speaker 2: choices like it, I think we deserve a ton of grace,

1247
00:59:15,480 --> 00:59:17,640
Speaker 2: but now it's also and I have to like tell

1248
00:59:17,680 --> 00:59:19,520
Speaker 2: myself daily, I'm like, we'll put on your big girl

1249
00:59:19,560 --> 00:59:22,080
Speaker 2: pants because the problems are still there. You can give

1250
00:59:22,080 --> 00:59:24,080
Speaker 2: yourself grace, but the problems still have to be dealt with.

1251
00:59:24,680 --> 00:59:28,680
Speaker 2: And like for anyone who's listening and who has maybe

1252
00:59:28,720 --> 00:59:30,680
Speaker 2: they've lost sight of who they are. They've made some choices,

1253
00:59:30,680 --> 00:59:34,160
Speaker 2: They've ended up with financial burdens that are now causing

1254
00:59:34,200 --> 00:59:38,120
Speaker 2: them even more stress. Like where do we start naming it?

1255
00:59:38,120 --> 00:59:38,360
Speaker 1: Shore?

1256
00:59:38,960 --> 00:59:42,240
Speaker 2: But now the is it? Sometimes I think we focus

1257
00:59:42,240 --> 00:59:45,360
Speaker 2: a lot on okay, well, let's pay down that debt

1258
00:59:45,560 --> 00:59:47,840
Speaker 2: or offloaded or try to you know, consolidate it and

1259
00:59:47,880 --> 00:59:50,320
Speaker 2: make it more affordable, and we kind of forget the

1260
00:59:50,360 --> 00:59:53,120
Speaker 2: part of like, well let's increase somewhere else?

1261
00:59:53,720 --> 00:59:53,920
Speaker 1: Is it?

1262
00:59:53,960 --> 00:59:57,520
Speaker 2: Like focus on earning more somewhere else to take care

1263
00:59:57,600 --> 01:00:00,560
Speaker 2: of that? And then the choice is that you make

1264
01:00:00,640 --> 01:00:03,760
Speaker 2: to earn more to take care of that, Like how

1265
01:00:03,760 --> 01:00:06,240
Speaker 2: do you get those back in alignment with like who

1266
01:00:06,280 --> 01:00:06,760
Speaker 2: you are?

1267
01:00:07,360 --> 01:00:09,280
Speaker 1: I think it's not just naming it, but it's naming

1268
01:00:09,280 --> 01:00:14,200
Speaker 1: it and really like understanding what actually is happening internally,

1269
01:00:14,440 --> 01:00:17,400
Speaker 1: because truthfully, you can almost make anything work, work externally,

1270
01:00:17,920 --> 01:00:19,280
Speaker 1: you know what I mean, Like there are people who

1271
01:00:19,280 --> 01:00:22,040
Speaker 1: are succeeding with way less than you. There are people

1272
01:00:22,160 --> 01:00:27,040
Speaker 1: who but that you can't outearn like trauma. You know

1273
01:00:27,080 --> 01:00:29,720
Speaker 1: what I mean, You can't like outsave.

1274
01:00:30,760 --> 01:00:34,880
Speaker 2: I know even Okay, got a really fat check. I mean,

1275
01:00:35,120 --> 01:00:37,760
Speaker 2: and I promise I'll never do it again, you know.

1276
01:00:38,000 --> 01:00:40,360
Speaker 1: So that's that's the real So I don't say the

1277
01:00:40,400 --> 01:00:42,840
Speaker 1: real word. I get it. It's it's certainly money is

1278
01:00:42,880 --> 01:00:45,720
Speaker 1: the last piece, but it actually becomes easier when you

1279
01:00:45,760 --> 01:00:49,840
Speaker 1: work on that. What's actually happening here? When I do that?

1280
01:00:50,120 --> 01:00:53,120
Speaker 1: What am I avoiding? What am I not saying? What

1281
01:00:53,200 --> 01:00:55,440
Speaker 1: am I not? You have to like, really is that

1282
01:00:55,600 --> 01:00:57,640
Speaker 1: is the work, and then you can tack on, like

1283
01:00:57,680 --> 01:00:59,040
Speaker 1: you know, I can make a little extra here, or

1284
01:00:59,040 --> 01:01:01,919
Speaker 1: I can save some here. That actually becomes easier when

1285
01:01:02,360 --> 01:01:05,320
Speaker 1: you start to really work on them. Oh, when I

1286
01:01:05,400 --> 01:01:08,400
Speaker 1: feel like a little out of control or when I

1287
01:01:08,520 --> 01:01:13,040
Speaker 1: feel sad, because it will you will have to learn

1288
01:01:13,200 --> 01:01:16,360
Speaker 1: relive the lesson until it's learned, you know what I mean.

1289
01:01:16,400 --> 01:01:18,000
Speaker 1: And that's the real issue, is that you're going to

1290
01:01:18,040 --> 01:01:21,280
Speaker 1: find yourself back in that financial hole until the lesson

1291
01:01:21,360 --> 01:01:24,280
Speaker 1: is learned, Like I'm just now having an AHA moment, Like, Okay,

1292
01:01:24,320 --> 01:01:27,320
Speaker 1: tiffany next time you want to do that thing. What

1293
01:01:27,520 --> 01:01:31,080
Speaker 1: is it that I'm really saying? Am I am I feeling?

1294
01:01:31,360 --> 01:01:32,560
Speaker 1: And is it grief?

1295
01:01:32,960 --> 01:01:33,360
Speaker 2: Is it.

1296
01:01:35,040 --> 01:01:37,160
Speaker 1: A feeling of like because so much of my identity

1297
01:01:37,240 --> 01:01:40,040
Speaker 1: is wrapped into like what I can perceive to be

1298
01:01:40,120 --> 01:01:42,360
Speaker 1: my value to the world, Like I'm valuable because I

1299
01:01:42,360 --> 01:01:45,000
Speaker 1: can help you do this. Hey, hey, mom and Dad,

1300
01:01:45,000 --> 01:01:47,400
Speaker 1: I'll pick off your house, hey, sister, So so like

1301
01:01:47,440 --> 01:01:51,840
Speaker 1: what is that that? Like my value? I'm valuable to

1302
01:01:51,840 --> 01:01:54,800
Speaker 1: people even if I don't financially show up for them,

1303
01:01:55,200 --> 01:01:57,320
Speaker 1: And so like, if I don't work on that, I

1304
01:01:57,360 --> 01:02:00,920
Speaker 1: will continue continuously financial show up in a way that's

1305
01:02:00,920 --> 01:02:03,000
Speaker 1: a burden for me and a blessing for others, and

1306
01:02:03,160 --> 01:02:05,320
Speaker 1: will just keep living this cycle, except ATE's can to.

1307
01:02:05,280 --> 01:02:06,160
Speaker 2: Be more and more expensive.

1308
01:02:06,680 --> 01:02:08,160
Speaker 1: And so that's why you know, That's why I said,

1309
01:02:08,200 --> 01:02:09,840
Speaker 1: like and not to say you don't work on the

1310
01:02:09,880 --> 01:02:12,640
Speaker 1: financial part, but that other part is so important or

1311
01:02:12,720 --> 01:02:14,720
Speaker 1: sh'll be back here again with a bigger bill.

1312
01:02:15,280 --> 01:02:18,320
Speaker 2: I just know, ba fan like especially longtime listeners, like

1313
01:02:18,920 --> 01:02:20,840
Speaker 2: I feel like at this point we know how to

1314
01:02:21,360 --> 01:02:23,800
Speaker 2: the steps of tackling dead and like all the income

1315
01:02:23,800 --> 01:02:26,680
Speaker 2: and stuff. I feel like we know, but it's that

1316
01:02:27,560 --> 01:02:31,439
Speaker 2: it's that internal piece y you know, getting this right? Yes,

1317
01:02:31,520 --> 01:02:33,040
Speaker 2: And I know what you said. I mean I went

1318
01:02:33,040 --> 01:02:35,000
Speaker 2: through the exact same thing, like is my value what

1319
01:02:35,080 --> 01:02:37,680
Speaker 2: I can give to people? And if I'm not successful,

1320
01:02:37,720 --> 01:02:38,840
Speaker 2: then who am I? And then I had like a

1321
01:02:38,880 --> 01:02:41,760
Speaker 2: psychotic break you know around that. Maybe not a psychotic break,

1322
01:02:41,760 --> 01:02:43,120
Speaker 2: I don't actually know what that is, but like a

1323
01:02:43,200 --> 01:02:47,960
Speaker 2: real mental health like crossroads for me was this idea

1324
01:02:47,960 --> 01:02:50,920
Speaker 2: of I'm not the successful person, so I'm nothing to

1325
01:02:51,000 --> 01:02:54,320
Speaker 2: nobody and of no value. I don't feel that way

1326
01:02:54,320 --> 01:02:59,880
Speaker 2: so much anymore, but it's like giving myself permission and grace.

1327
01:03:00,080 --> 01:03:02,760
Speaker 2: And I'm saying this in real time to like, you know,

1328
01:03:03,360 --> 01:03:06,080
Speaker 2: to not be perfect and not have it all figured

1329
01:03:06,120 --> 01:03:11,240
Speaker 2: out at all times. In an age where everyone is

1330
01:03:11,280 --> 01:03:15,880
Speaker 2: expecting like a picture perfect frame of whether it's brown ambition,

1331
01:03:16,400 --> 01:03:19,480
Speaker 2: me and writing my book, you know, like whatever I'm

1332
01:03:19,480 --> 01:03:21,600
Speaker 2: putting out into the world, I feel like there's an

1333
01:03:21,600 --> 01:03:24,800
Speaker 2: expectation of, like, please be doing well, because it's so tough.

1334
01:03:24,800 --> 01:03:27,840
Speaker 2: We want to see someone win well. I think that's

1335
01:03:27,840 --> 01:03:29,440
Speaker 2: why these conversations are important.

1336
01:03:29,720 --> 01:03:32,280
Speaker 1: One thing I really love about our friends always like one,

1337
01:03:32,440 --> 01:03:34,120
Speaker 1: you know, we're honest with each other, but when we

1338
01:03:34,160 --> 01:03:36,880
Speaker 1: get on brown ambition, we're honest.

1339
01:03:36,920 --> 01:03:37,920
Speaker 2: What is there a microphone here?

1340
01:03:38,280 --> 01:03:40,840
Speaker 1: I know sometimes mighty be like I said that, all right,

1341
01:03:41,680 --> 01:03:44,200
Speaker 1: But it's important for it to be said because if

1342
01:03:44,240 --> 01:03:47,120
Speaker 1: we pretend like everything's perfect, then it gives people the

1343
01:03:47,120 --> 01:03:50,320
Speaker 1: permission to then be hard on themselves and to say, well,

1344
01:03:50,360 --> 01:03:52,640
Speaker 1: if mandyativity can do, why am I not doing it?

1345
01:03:53,000 --> 01:03:55,360
Speaker 1: And we're like, we're not doing it. You know, it's

1346
01:03:55,400 --> 01:03:58,200
Speaker 1: important to show like the real when things are up

1347
01:03:58,240 --> 01:04:00,320
Speaker 1: great and when things are not up and this is

1348
01:04:00,400 --> 01:04:03,880
Speaker 1: just human. Like Doctor Green would tell me sometimes when

1349
01:04:03,880 --> 01:04:05,440
Speaker 1: I would tell her about a mistake I made, She's like,

1350
01:04:05,520 --> 01:04:08,320
Speaker 1: so we're mad at ourselves for being human? Like what

1351
01:04:08,440 --> 01:04:09,560
Speaker 1: is the expectation here?

1352
01:04:10,000 --> 01:04:10,120
Speaker 2: Like?

1353
01:04:11,080 --> 01:04:12,960
Speaker 1: Are you mad at yourself for being human? I mean

1354
01:04:13,600 --> 01:04:15,760
Speaker 1: like it's that giving it grace? Like if I got

1355
01:04:15,760 --> 01:04:19,080
Speaker 1: everything right, then you know I would be God, and

1356
01:04:19,120 --> 01:04:24,320
Speaker 1: I'm not. You know, I'm just just a girl figuring

1357
01:04:24,320 --> 01:04:27,200
Speaker 1: it out with her back blown out because she's stressed.

1358
01:04:30,960 --> 01:04:32,520
Speaker 2: Do you feel like you know you have that those

1359
01:04:32,520 --> 01:04:35,880
Speaker 2: ten steps to financial wholeness and get good with money

1360
01:04:36,000 --> 01:04:38,920
Speaker 2: if there's a step in there that you would say, like, okay,

1361
01:04:38,920 --> 01:04:40,320
Speaker 2: if you've got the book, which I feel like I'll

1362
01:04:40,320 --> 01:04:42,640
Speaker 2: be a family have the book. Like if there's a

1363
01:04:42,720 --> 01:04:45,480
Speaker 2: chapter based on this conversation that people should go to,

1364
01:04:45,840 --> 01:04:50,480
Speaker 2: which one would it be? Let's see if there was

1365
01:04:50,560 --> 01:04:53,000
Speaker 2: a chapter. I'm just thinking, maybe you didn't write it.

1366
01:04:53,000 --> 01:04:53,320
Speaker 2: You need to.

1367
01:04:53,960 --> 01:04:57,600
Speaker 1: No, I mean there is the first like the kind

1368
01:04:57,600 --> 01:05:01,080
Speaker 1: of like the intro. It's all about mindset and shifting

1369
01:05:01,080 --> 01:05:02,960
Speaker 1: that because your money will never do better than what

1370
01:05:03,000 --> 01:05:06,080
Speaker 1: your mind will allow. I would say that, but will

1371
01:05:06,120 --> 01:05:13,480
Speaker 1: probably be huge. And then hmmm, maybe the chapter on

1372
01:05:15,040 --> 01:05:16,800
Speaker 1: I'm trying to think of. There's like a state planning,

1373
01:05:16,960 --> 01:05:20,240
Speaker 1: there's budgeting and maybe I mean it depends where you are.

1374
01:05:20,760 --> 01:05:24,080
Speaker 1: If you're like super foundational, then that budgeting chapter. But

1375
01:05:24,080 --> 01:05:27,960
Speaker 1: if you're in the growth stage, the income chapter if

1376
01:05:28,000 --> 01:05:30,440
Speaker 1: you're looking to like earn you know. But I think

1377
01:05:30,480 --> 01:05:34,080
Speaker 1: the mindset chapter is something that everyone could benefit from

1378
01:05:34,160 --> 01:05:36,240
Speaker 1: because you have to reset that in order to be

1379
01:05:36,240 --> 01:05:39,480
Speaker 1: able to receive whatever financial Because to me, it's more

1380
01:05:39,520 --> 01:05:42,720
Speaker 1: than money, really, it's this movement like I'm not actually

1381
01:05:42,760 --> 01:05:44,960
Speaker 1: like when I think about why I started the budgeting staff,

1382
01:05:45,360 --> 01:05:47,360
Speaker 1: it wasn't to help you get your money together. It

1383
01:05:47,520 --> 01:05:50,600
Speaker 1: was to bring you hope. Like so many people say,

1384
01:05:50,600 --> 01:05:52,080
Speaker 1: I can't do a thing. I can't have a baby,

1385
01:05:52,080 --> 01:05:54,280
Speaker 1: I can't get a house, I can't go to school

1386
01:05:54,320 --> 01:05:56,520
Speaker 1: because of my money. And I thought, well, if I

1387
01:05:56,560 --> 01:05:58,480
Speaker 1: could fix the money thing, would you go out and

1388
01:05:58,520 --> 01:06:01,120
Speaker 1: have that amazing life? And so to me, the money

1389
01:06:01,160 --> 01:06:03,680
Speaker 1: is merely just a tool to give you the permission

1390
01:06:03,720 --> 01:06:07,080
Speaker 1: and the resources to have that amazing life. And so

1391
01:06:07,240 --> 01:06:10,760
Speaker 1: like that's what I'm wanting for everyone, including myself, you know,

1392
01:06:11,040 --> 01:06:12,840
Speaker 1: is that like money is just merely one of the

1393
01:06:12,880 --> 01:06:16,720
Speaker 1: tools available to build the life that were deserving. You know, Yeah,

1394
01:06:17,240 --> 01:06:17,840
Speaker 1: that needs to be.

1395
01:06:17,800 --> 01:06:21,080
Speaker 2: The Brown Ambition book Club pick. Let's just make it happen,

1396
01:06:21,480 --> 01:06:23,320
Speaker 2: because the part of me, I'm like, cook it with Money, dub.

1397
01:06:23,440 --> 01:06:25,520
Speaker 2: Everyone already has that book, but to reread it it's

1398
01:06:25,560 --> 01:06:29,720
Speaker 2: been five years. Yeah, I know, five years. We should all.

1399
01:06:29,880 --> 01:06:33,840
Speaker 2: I think I'm personally going to reread Get Good with Money.

1400
01:06:34,040 --> 01:06:36,280
Speaker 2: I think it's it goes back to that idea of like,

1401
01:06:36,320 --> 01:06:38,280
Speaker 2: well you can know things then and feel empowered and

1402
01:06:38,320 --> 01:06:42,160
Speaker 2: do but it's like the reminder and the relearning, and

1403
01:06:42,280 --> 01:06:45,720
Speaker 2: I think what I've always loved about that book is

1404
01:06:46,040 --> 01:06:49,880
Speaker 2: the fact that it feels like instantly having permission to

1405
01:06:49,960 --> 01:06:54,560
Speaker 2: not have perfection, but then to have a framework to yeah,

1406
01:06:54,680 --> 01:06:55,360
Speaker 2: to get better.

1407
01:06:56,200 --> 01:06:58,320
Speaker 1: Get the softcover versus those people because not harassing me.

1408
01:06:58,880 --> 01:07:01,000
Speaker 1: When does it come out? I want to say, like

1409
01:07:01,000 --> 01:07:01,880
Speaker 1: March thirty, you.

1410
01:07:01,840 --> 01:07:03,840
Speaker 2: Call it the soft cover, the soft.

1411
01:07:03,840 --> 01:07:06,800
Speaker 1: What are people calling? Oh am, I so old school,

1412
01:07:06,880 --> 01:07:08,080
Speaker 1: but that's what we call him back in the day,

1413
01:07:08,120 --> 01:07:13,560
Speaker 1: the soft cover, the golf cover, Vinigarrett. I'm getting on

1414
01:07:13,680 --> 01:07:16,960
Speaker 1: my own, Alma. Remember like Elmo was like, he's like

1415
01:07:16,960 --> 01:07:20,080
Speaker 1: from the Bronx and they were like cooking with him,

1416
01:07:20,120 --> 01:07:22,600
Speaker 1: and his Bronx accents slipped down and he was like,

1417
01:07:22,640 --> 01:07:24,720
Speaker 1: we're gonna make some salad guys, you know, Elma, And

1418
01:07:24,800 --> 01:07:30,440
Speaker 1: he's like with some balsamic vinegarret swapt cuver.

1419
01:07:30,640 --> 01:07:33,320
Speaker 2: So my jersey is coming down. That's all right, break

1420
01:07:33,400 --> 01:07:34,080
Speaker 2: city in the house.

1421
01:07:37,200 --> 01:07:38,960
Speaker 1: I know, just to say that I love you.

1422
01:07:38,960 --> 01:07:41,840
Speaker 2: To my cold fingers, I know I do. Honestly, I'm

1423
01:07:41,880 --> 01:07:44,880
Speaker 2: really sorry that you came here with a broken back. No,

1424
01:07:45,040 --> 01:07:46,640
Speaker 2: I'm really happy that you came here with them. I

1425
01:07:46,680 --> 01:07:48,120
Speaker 2: am happy. This is the problem.

1426
01:07:48,240 --> 01:07:50,000
Speaker 1: I get positive reinforcement.

1427
01:07:49,640 --> 01:07:52,360
Speaker 2: But don't ever do it again. I feel like we

1428
01:07:52,440 --> 01:07:55,200
Speaker 2: could have this could have been a virtual No, it's

1429
01:07:55,240 --> 01:07:57,400
Speaker 2: really good to No one's gonna smell really good.

1430
01:07:57,560 --> 01:07:58,000
Speaker 1: Thank you?

1431
01:07:58,240 --> 01:07:58,920
Speaker 2: What are you wearing?

1432
01:07:59,280 --> 01:08:02,440
Speaker 1: So I'm my Booskie bought me. We were like on

1433
01:08:02,440 --> 01:08:05,440
Speaker 1: the first day. On the first day, we went to

1434
01:08:05,480 --> 01:08:07,960
Speaker 1: some place in Brooklyn. It was like one of these

1435
01:08:07,960 --> 01:08:12,560
Speaker 1: like collective places where they have like black owned like

1436
01:08:12,760 --> 01:08:16,040
Speaker 1: artists and and clothes whatever, and so there. I don't

1437
01:08:16,040 --> 01:08:18,599
Speaker 1: know if this is a black owned oil company, but

1438
01:08:18,600 --> 01:08:22,639
Speaker 1: it's the scentate is called Inferno. It smells so good.

1439
01:08:22,720 --> 01:08:24,080
Speaker 1: So we were like walk out of smell. That was like,

1440
01:08:24,080 --> 01:08:27,880
Speaker 1: oh my gosh. And so I think it's by blue

1441
01:08:28,040 --> 01:08:32,240
Speaker 1: is a blue Nile something like that, but it smells inferno.

1442
01:08:32,560 --> 01:08:34,120
Speaker 2: Okay, what was black? I got to put it in

1443
01:08:34,120 --> 01:08:34,400
Speaker 2: the show.

1444
01:08:34,640 --> 01:08:36,200
Speaker 1: Yeah, so so I'm not sure.

1445
01:08:36,320 --> 01:08:36,880
Speaker 2: A little oil.

1446
01:08:37,240 --> 01:08:38,680
Speaker 1: It's like a little oil. But like I put it

1447
01:08:38,720 --> 01:08:40,320
Speaker 1: on and I was like, ooh, you know oil like

1448
01:08:40,360 --> 01:08:48,000
Speaker 1: worms worms? Up with you? Yeah, studio, we're right here.

1449
01:08:48,000 --> 01:08:51,040
Speaker 1: I would go say spicy. I love for people like,

1450
01:08:51,040 --> 01:08:51,760
Speaker 1: oh is that you like?

1451
01:08:51,880 --> 01:08:52,360
Speaker 2: It? Is?

1452
01:08:53,040 --> 01:08:53,160
Speaker 1: Well?

1453
01:08:53,160 --> 01:08:55,000
Speaker 2: I don't want to put you on the spot, but

1454
01:08:55,720 --> 01:08:58,120
Speaker 2: since you're here, can we do a little brown, boost

1455
01:08:58,160 --> 01:09:01,920
Speaker 2: brown break. Oh yes you remember how this? Yes one,

1456
01:09:02,120 --> 01:09:04,360
Speaker 2: Now it is time to do stuff?

1457
01:09:04,400 --> 01:09:04,840
Speaker 1: Make up.

1458
01:09:07,520 --> 01:09:13,519
Speaker 2: An are innovate? What you gonna do? What you gonna say?

1459
01:09:14,800 --> 01:09:20,280
Speaker 2: Oh my god, wow, I don't remember anything. What was.

1460
01:09:21,960 --> 01:09:23,960
Speaker 1: It'd be like ten years and I'm like, what was up?

1461
01:09:24,040 --> 01:09:28,719
Speaker 1: But then yeah, okay, boosty breaking. I'm gonna boost because

1462
01:09:28,720 --> 01:09:31,000
Speaker 1: the world is a ship storm, so we're not finna.

1463
01:09:31,479 --> 01:09:34,560
Speaker 2: I'm so tired of that being true. I want to

1464
01:09:34,600 --> 01:09:36,200
Speaker 2: disagree with you, but it isn't fact true.

1465
01:09:36,560 --> 01:09:43,880
Speaker 1: Okay, so I am going to booze. What am I

1466
01:09:43,960 --> 01:09:49,440
Speaker 1: gonna boost? I'm gonna boost community.

1467
01:09:49,640 --> 01:09:49,800
Speaker 2: Right.

1468
01:09:50,439 --> 01:09:53,640
Speaker 1: So when I think about all that's happening currently in

1469
01:09:53,680 --> 01:09:56,240
Speaker 1: the world, but also all that's happened in my personal life,

1470
01:09:56,280 --> 01:09:58,800
Speaker 1: I think about like, oh man, I'm surrounded by such

1471
01:09:58,920 --> 01:10:02,080
Speaker 1: good people, you know, like it's almost like, with the

1472
01:10:02,200 --> 01:10:06,400
Speaker 1: world being so crazy, it only highlights like, oh man,

1473
01:10:06,400 --> 01:10:08,560
Speaker 1: I've got for the good friends. I think about you.

1474
01:10:08,720 --> 01:10:12,240
Speaker 1: I think about Caprell, I think about Linda. I think

1475
01:10:12,240 --> 01:10:14,680
Speaker 1: about Rihanna and Jermaine her husband. I think about my

1476
01:10:14,840 --> 01:10:18,200
Speaker 1: sisters and my nieces and my nephew. I think about

1477
01:10:18,240 --> 01:10:20,800
Speaker 1: my team, you know, like I'm not gonna lie. It's

1478
01:10:20,840 --> 01:10:24,880
Speaker 1: so poignant now because there's so much negativity that it

1479
01:10:25,040 --> 01:10:29,120
Speaker 1: makes the positive things even more precious. And so I'm

1480
01:10:29,160 --> 01:10:32,720
Speaker 1: just found about like just the best people. You know,

1481
01:10:32,920 --> 01:10:36,640
Speaker 1: it certainly doesn't erase the negativity. And even like my

1482
01:10:37,360 --> 01:10:40,600
Speaker 1: my boyfriend now I found him on the apps, I

1483
01:10:40,760 --> 01:10:47,640
Speaker 1: know for getting this story and ripe somber when I

1484
01:10:48,240 --> 01:10:50,560
Speaker 1: told Mandy that I was like just practicing that I

1485
01:10:50,720 --> 01:10:53,519
Speaker 1: went on Black People Meet, which you mercilessly tease me,

1486
01:10:53,560 --> 01:10:55,360
Speaker 1: you said, say to my dad because my dad's on AD.

1487
01:10:56,640 --> 01:10:59,360
Speaker 1: It wasn't a bad because I did not know that

1488
01:10:59,479 --> 01:11:02,040
Speaker 1: the average age of Black People Meet was like six.

1489
01:11:03,479 --> 01:11:05,640
Speaker 1: So every manner of pop pop was hitting me up, Hey,

1490
01:11:05,720 --> 01:11:10,640
Speaker 1: who's doing on here? Literally yeah, But I was just

1491
01:11:10,680 --> 01:11:12,000
Speaker 1: stay of practice. I was like, I'll try to be

1492
01:11:12,000 --> 01:11:14,680
Speaker 1: outside in the summer, which I was. I said, I

1493
01:11:14,800 --> 01:11:16,800
Speaker 1: just wanted to day cute enough, cool enough, those are

1494
01:11:16,840 --> 01:11:19,840
Speaker 1: my qualifications. You could have had seventeen thousand kids. I

1495
01:11:19,880 --> 01:11:22,479
Speaker 1: don't care cut enough, cool enough one day for practice,

1496
01:11:23,040 --> 01:11:24,920
Speaker 1: and I said I wanted to practice with like you know,

1497
01:11:25,080 --> 01:11:28,640
Speaker 1: the pictures, which ones were good, my profile, whatever. So

1498
01:11:28,840 --> 01:11:30,960
Speaker 1: I was outside the summer. I was out almost every

1499
01:11:31,000 --> 01:11:34,400
Speaker 1: weekend which is typically not me. And I had such

1500
01:11:34,400 --> 01:11:38,519
Speaker 1: a good time and then I met Jay it will

1501
01:11:38,600 --> 01:11:42,200
Speaker 1: just say. And so he also was confused, like what's

1502
01:11:42,240 --> 01:11:44,600
Speaker 1: going on here because everybody who's hitting me up is

1503
01:11:44,640 --> 01:11:46,799
Speaker 1: someone's grandma, because he did not know either.

1504
01:11:46,760 --> 01:11:49,599
Speaker 2: Oh he was, oh that's right, oh yeaheah, both little

1505
01:11:49,640 --> 01:11:53,520
Speaker 2: pyts like what's going on on here? The senior citizen.

1506
01:11:53,240 --> 01:11:56,519
Speaker 1: Apple, yes, yes, And so he stood out obviously, but

1507
01:11:56,600 --> 01:11:59,160
Speaker 1: I was still on my cut enough, cool enough. But

1508
01:11:59,280 --> 01:12:01,080
Speaker 1: then like one day turned to a next to next,

1509
01:12:01,160 --> 01:12:02,760
Speaker 1: I was like, wow, he's pretty amazing, and he is,

1510
01:12:04,280 --> 01:12:07,000
Speaker 1: and so that's just been another addition to like really

1511
01:12:07,040 --> 01:12:09,559
Speaker 1: good people in my life who are like just amazing

1512
01:12:09,640 --> 01:12:14,320
Speaker 1: and so yeah, so just then brown boost to like

1513
01:12:14,840 --> 01:12:16,120
Speaker 1: good people, you.

1514
01:12:16,160 --> 01:12:18,920
Speaker 2: Know, people who've known you through different chapters. Yeah, it's

1515
01:12:19,040 --> 01:12:22,599
Speaker 2: so valuable. Like I'm talking to my cousin about her

1516
01:12:22,640 --> 01:12:24,720
Speaker 2: she has some friendship drama with her roommate, and I'm like,

1517
01:12:25,320 --> 01:12:27,880
Speaker 2: get through it, because in another ten years she'll be

1518
01:12:27,960 --> 01:12:29,760
Speaker 2: the only one who knew you at this stage and

1519
01:12:29,880 --> 01:12:31,679
Speaker 2: like really went through it. And I think that, yeah,

1520
01:12:32,320 --> 01:12:34,439
Speaker 2: and that's why I value our friendship so much too.

1521
01:12:34,560 --> 01:12:37,160
Speaker 2: I mean, I think at this stage like you have

1522
01:12:37,320 --> 01:12:39,840
Speaker 2: known me through one of the biggest decades. Yeah, you

1523
01:12:39,920 --> 01:12:41,880
Speaker 2: know times in my life and single girls.

1524
01:12:41,920 --> 01:12:45,560
Speaker 1: Remember it's just like outside that's so crazy. I know,

1525
01:12:45,720 --> 01:12:48,120
Speaker 1: no kids, no hobbies, no nothing, imagine. Yeah.

1526
01:12:48,240 --> 01:12:51,040
Speaker 2: And now her own historians around us and like just

1527
01:12:51,120 --> 01:12:53,479
Speaker 2: remind us of where we are in the mess. So

1528
01:12:53,720 --> 01:12:56,880
Speaker 2: that's beautiful community. I had to make sure I got

1529
01:12:56,920 --> 01:12:58,720
Speaker 2: this name right because my brown boost is going to

1530
01:12:58,760 --> 01:13:05,639
Speaker 2: be Syria Bonally. She is the black figure skater who

1531
01:13:06,400 --> 01:13:10,040
Speaker 2: was one of the She was the first figure skater

1532
01:13:10,200 --> 01:13:13,160
Speaker 2: to do a backflip during the Olympics, and she did

1533
01:13:13,200 --> 01:13:15,720
Speaker 2: it in nineteen ninety eight and I always wanted to

1534
01:13:15,760 --> 01:13:18,320
Speaker 2: shout her out because there's this figure skater in the

1535
01:13:18,320 --> 01:13:23,400
Speaker 2: Olympics right now, this white gentleman, extremely talented. He's doing backflips.

1536
01:13:23,400 --> 01:13:26,320
Speaker 2: He's like Benson Boone on ice okay, And there's been

1537
01:13:26,360 --> 01:13:28,799
Speaker 2: these headlines saying that he's like the first to complete

1538
01:13:28,840 --> 01:13:31,439
Speaker 2: a backflip. He's the first since it became it's like

1539
01:13:31,520 --> 01:13:33,920
Speaker 2: the first year it's actually legal. Yes, but she did

1540
01:13:33,960 --> 01:13:36,800
Speaker 2: it when it was illegal, and I just got to

1541
01:13:36,880 --> 01:13:39,799
Speaker 2: know her story a little bit more, and she apparently

1542
01:13:39,840 --> 01:13:42,559
Speaker 2: the year that she did that backflip. She had made

1543
01:13:42,600 --> 01:13:45,360
Speaker 2: a mistake in her short or something. I don't know

1544
01:13:45,520 --> 01:13:48,720
Speaker 2: everything about figure skating, shocking, but she knew she wasn't

1545
01:13:48,760 --> 01:13:50,799
Speaker 2: going to have a high enough score to like medal,

1546
01:13:51,080 --> 01:13:52,840
Speaker 2: and so she was like, let me leave my mark

1547
01:13:53,200 --> 01:13:55,160
Speaker 2: in some form of fashion, and she did the backflip.

1548
01:13:55,640 --> 01:13:57,920
Speaker 2: And I was reading an interview that she gave and

1549
01:13:58,000 --> 01:14:00,519
Speaker 2: she was like, I actually felt a little ash, Like

1550
01:14:00,600 --> 01:14:02,720
Speaker 2: people were negative, they were they hated her for it,

1551
01:14:02,880 --> 01:14:04,240
Speaker 2: like how could you do this? There was all this

1552
01:14:04,360 --> 01:14:07,639
Speaker 2: like visceral reaction, and now like twenty something years later,

1553
01:14:07,960 --> 01:14:10,519
Speaker 2: she's like, I feel so proud of it today. And

1554
01:14:10,640 --> 01:14:12,840
Speaker 2: it just reminded me how in the moment, doing the

1555
01:14:12,920 --> 01:14:17,000
Speaker 2: brave thing feels really shitty and uncomfortable. Excuse me, And

1556
01:14:17,040 --> 01:14:19,880
Speaker 2: how I think that people want you to They want

1557
01:14:19,960 --> 01:14:22,760
Speaker 2: heroes to be like like, oh, you were so brave

1558
01:14:22,840 --> 01:14:24,680
Speaker 2: and you always knew that that was going to work out,

1559
01:14:24,760 --> 01:14:26,600
Speaker 2: and you know we did it with such confidence. But

1560
01:14:27,080 --> 01:14:30,160
Speaker 2: it's so real that in the moment, doing the thing

1561
01:14:30,240 --> 01:14:33,519
Speaker 2: that's best can feel really wrong and just to push

1562
01:14:33,560 --> 01:14:36,120
Speaker 2: through that. And so I love that shut out to Syria.

1563
01:14:36,439 --> 01:14:39,840
Speaker 2: I hope I said it right. Bonally, she's French. I

1564
01:14:39,920 --> 01:14:46,160
Speaker 2: love that and yeah, well, Tiffany, I know a good time.

1565
01:14:46,600 --> 01:14:47,040
Speaker 1: Who knows.

1566
01:14:47,080 --> 01:14:49,000
Speaker 2: I had a whole list of questions I was going

1567
01:14:49,080 --> 01:14:49,360
Speaker 2: to ask you.

1568
01:14:49,479 --> 01:14:51,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, boom boom boom tomato tomato.

1569
01:14:51,240 --> 01:14:55,599
Speaker 2: I thought it would be professional, the tomato tovedo. Yeah,

1570
01:14:55,600 --> 01:15:01,800
Speaker 2: I get the blood from a tobado. Oh rba Fam. Well,

1571
01:15:01,840 --> 01:15:03,759
Speaker 2: we're all gonna go get the softs and the swaths

1572
01:15:04,040 --> 01:15:06,920
Speaker 2: cover of Get Good with Money and the workbook made

1573
01:15:06,960 --> 01:15:09,920
Speaker 2: whole and we are just gonna wait on tenterhooks for

1574
01:15:11,000 --> 01:15:14,880
Speaker 2: the gifts of grief. Yeah, thank thank you so much. Wow,

1575
01:15:14,960 --> 01:15:17,599
Speaker 2: I love you too, all right, ba Fam, bye bye.

1576
01:15:23,320 --> 01:15:25,360
Speaker 2: And before I go, Ba Fam, I want to shout

1577
01:15:25,360 --> 01:15:28,479
Speaker 2: out the team that helps make Brown Ambition possible. Huge

1578
01:15:28,640 --> 01:15:32,519
Speaker 2: thanks to my fam at iHeartRadio, Katrina Norvel and Jenna Cagel,

1579
01:15:33,000 --> 01:15:36,639
Speaker 2: my worker Bees behind the scenes, booking assistant Brittany Laie

1580
01:15:36,840 --> 01:15:41,120
Speaker 2: and virtual assistant Cameron McNair who keeps organized, and of course,

1581
01:15:41,200 --> 01:15:44,360
Speaker 2: my editor Courtney Dean. Thank y'all so much for supporting

1582
01:15:44,400 --> 01:15:47,040
Speaker 2: the show. If you love Brown Ambition, share it with

1583
01:15:47,160 --> 01:15:49,680
Speaker 2: a friend, tag us on social and don't forget to

1584
01:15:49,800 --> 01:15:53,120
Speaker 2: leave a comment or review. Until next time. By ba Fam,