1 00:00:01,600 --> 00:00:04,800 Speaker 1: You're listening to I Choose Me with Jenny Garth. 2 00:00:08,560 --> 00:00:11,360 Speaker 2: Hey, everybody, welcome to I Choose Me. This podcast is 3 00:00:11,400 --> 00:00:14,120 Speaker 2: all about the choices we make and where they lead us. 4 00:00:14,720 --> 00:00:19,840 Speaker 2: My guest today is pretty much incredible, a reality TV icon, 5 00:00:20,000 --> 00:00:24,200 Speaker 2: an entrepreneur, an actress, a mother, a wife, a voice 6 00:00:24,239 --> 00:00:27,920 Speaker 2: of reason to so many, and an advocate for the 7 00:00:28,080 --> 00:00:33,040 Speaker 2: LGBTQ plus community, which is amazing. You know her from 8 00:00:33,200 --> 00:00:36,920 Speaker 2: multiple seasons of the Real Housewives of Orange County and 9 00:00:36,920 --> 00:00:39,440 Speaker 2: our podcast Let's Talk with Heather Dubro. 10 00:00:40,640 --> 00:00:43,000 Speaker 1: Here she is in front of me. Let's talk Heather Dubro. 11 00:00:43,200 --> 00:00:46,040 Speaker 1: I just did your podcast. Yes, it was amazing, loved 12 00:00:46,080 --> 00:00:46,400 Speaker 1: having you. 13 00:00:46,560 --> 00:00:49,400 Speaker 2: If you guys didn't hear it, go over and check 14 00:00:49,440 --> 00:00:52,200 Speaker 2: it out on Let's Talk with Heather Deubra. 15 00:00:52,560 --> 00:00:55,760 Speaker 1: But do you say DEBRAU to b This is why 16 00:00:55,880 --> 00:00:57,400 Speaker 1: they took me. When Terry and I got married, it 17 00:00:57,440 --> 00:00:59,600 Speaker 1: took me like fifteen years to change my name because 18 00:00:59,680 --> 00:01:02,200 Speaker 1: my name was Heather Page Can. It's a good name, 19 00:01:02,240 --> 00:01:03,680 Speaker 1: that's a great and it's not even a stage. That 20 00:01:03,760 --> 00:01:06,240 Speaker 1: was my name either. Page can't Ether Page Can and 21 00:01:07,000 --> 00:01:09,600 Speaker 1: I meet Terry and we get married, and it looks 22 00:01:09,640 --> 00:01:12,200 Speaker 1: the way it's spelled it looks like dubrow, like eyebrow, 23 00:01:12,600 --> 00:01:14,360 Speaker 1: and I hated that, so I said, down, my go, 24 00:01:14,600 --> 00:01:17,240 Speaker 1: if you change the spelling to like d u b 25 00:01:17,680 --> 00:01:21,360 Speaker 1: r e a u X like du bleau, I'm totally in. 26 00:01:21,640 --> 00:01:24,479 Speaker 1: Yeah he would know. So it took me like fifteen years. 27 00:01:24,480 --> 00:01:25,479 Speaker 1: Then I finally changed it. 28 00:01:25,600 --> 00:01:31,480 Speaker 2: Well, I like it dubro dubro yes, like hey bro, heybro. Yeah, 29 00:01:31,520 --> 00:01:33,080 Speaker 2: the spelling really does throw me every time. 30 00:01:33,080 --> 00:01:34,360 Speaker 1: I lo, that's okay. 31 00:01:34,880 --> 00:01:36,680 Speaker 2: We were talking so much and we had such a 32 00:01:36,680 --> 00:01:40,039 Speaker 2: great conversation, so definitely check that out. But I realized 33 00:01:40,240 --> 00:01:44,080 Speaker 2: I came here thinking, oh, I'm so excited to meet her, 34 00:01:43,640 --> 00:01:47,200 Speaker 2: to get to know her. It's not the first time 35 00:01:47,240 --> 00:01:49,240 Speaker 2: that we've met, so embarrassing for me. 36 00:01:49,360 --> 00:01:51,680 Speaker 1: Correct it was a long time, but I appreciate that. 37 00:01:51,640 --> 00:01:53,320 Speaker 2: You're not mad at me about it, and now you're like, 38 00:01:53,440 --> 00:01:54,880 Speaker 2: you'll just tell me and remind me. 39 00:01:54,920 --> 00:01:57,800 Speaker 1: And now now I remember, Yes, we go way back, yeah, 40 00:01:57,840 --> 00:02:01,240 Speaker 1: way back, like almost twenty years. It's so good. It's 41 00:02:01,240 --> 00:02:02,480 Speaker 1: so good. And I did learn. 42 00:02:02,600 --> 00:02:04,880 Speaker 2: I feel much closer to you now because we never 43 00:02:04,920 --> 00:02:08,200 Speaker 2: sat down and had these kinds of definitely these amazing talks. 44 00:02:08,240 --> 00:02:09,120 Speaker 1: So I'm really. 45 00:02:08,919 --> 00:02:10,680 Speaker 2: Excited to be able to do that today with you 46 00:02:10,760 --> 00:02:14,680 Speaker 2: and getting to know you. I love the woman that 47 00:02:14,760 --> 00:02:19,120 Speaker 2: you are. You're You're inspirational, You're what you're doing with 48 00:02:19,360 --> 00:02:24,239 Speaker 2: your platform and as an entrepreneur things that you're doing. 49 00:02:24,280 --> 00:02:27,919 Speaker 2: You have your own fashion line. You've done amazing stuff 50 00:02:27,960 --> 00:02:30,880 Speaker 2: with your husband too, which I love. I've always wanted 51 00:02:30,880 --> 00:02:34,000 Speaker 2: to do work with my husband. He's in the restaurant world. 52 00:02:34,040 --> 00:02:35,880 Speaker 2: So it's not really Yeah. 53 00:02:35,680 --> 00:02:37,200 Speaker 1: So you don't have anything. Well, it's funny. I thought 54 00:02:37,200 --> 00:02:39,640 Speaker 1: I married a doctor. I didn't. Really, I married like 55 00:02:39,680 --> 00:02:42,920 Speaker 1: a TV star. It wasn't on my Bengo card, but 56 00:02:42,960 --> 00:02:45,440 Speaker 1: I created I'd say he's my Frankenstein, I say sometimes. 57 00:02:45,480 --> 00:02:50,239 Speaker 1: But you know his show Botch was really born out 58 00:02:50,240 --> 00:02:54,360 Speaker 1: of Housewives really well, I mean yeah, kind of because 59 00:02:54,400 --> 00:02:58,320 Speaker 1: he and Paul Nassif, who's ex wife was on Beverly 60 00:02:58,360 --> 00:03:01,160 Speaker 1: Hills Housewives, and we've known them since before they got 61 00:03:01,200 --> 00:03:04,680 Speaker 1: married a long time, so you know, that's really how 62 00:03:04,720 --> 00:03:07,160 Speaker 1: that was born. So what that platform has done for 63 00:03:07,240 --> 00:03:09,240 Speaker 1: us is you know huge. 64 00:03:09,360 --> 00:03:11,320 Speaker 2: Yeah, can I say something and you won't get mad 65 00:03:11,320 --> 00:03:14,760 Speaker 2: at me? No, I've never watched really anywhere, yeh, don't. 66 00:03:15,400 --> 00:03:18,200 Speaker 2: It's embarrassing to say at this point, because it's it's 67 00:03:18,240 --> 00:03:18,720 Speaker 2: a monster. 68 00:03:18,760 --> 00:03:21,919 Speaker 1: It's everywhere, It's everywhere, and I have such. 69 00:03:22,480 --> 00:03:27,239 Speaker 2: Profound appreciation for it because I understand what it takes 70 00:03:27,639 --> 00:03:30,280 Speaker 2: and the women, so many of the women on it 71 00:03:30,400 --> 00:03:34,520 Speaker 2: are just bad ass, amazing women. But I've never watched 72 00:03:34,520 --> 00:03:35,080 Speaker 2: an episode. 73 00:03:35,160 --> 00:03:38,520 Speaker 1: Yeah, so I watched like the first season of Beverly 74 00:03:38,560 --> 00:03:43,560 Speaker 1: Hills because we knew Paul and Adrian, and I was like, oh, like, 75 00:03:43,760 --> 00:03:45,280 Speaker 1: you know, let's watch them. So we watched like the 76 00:03:45,280 --> 00:03:48,480 Speaker 1: first season, I think, and that was it. And then 77 00:03:48,560 --> 00:03:52,320 Speaker 1: when I joined Orange County, I had never seen Orange County. 78 00:03:52,360 --> 00:03:55,360 Speaker 1: I knew nothing about it. And so was that the 79 00:03:55,400 --> 00:03:59,280 Speaker 1: second iteration of it? It was the first Orange County 80 00:03:59,320 --> 00:04:01,640 Speaker 1: to the original it is. Yeah, this will be the 81 00:04:01,680 --> 00:04:05,040 Speaker 1: nineteenth season of Orange County Housewives. Wow is that crazy? 82 00:04:05,040 --> 00:04:08,400 Speaker 1: And I started the show when my youngest was nine 83 00:04:08,400 --> 00:04:10,760 Speaker 1: months old and he just turned fourteen. You are a 84 00:04:10,800 --> 00:04:13,320 Speaker 1: completely different person when you started, completely different. But I 85 00:04:13,400 --> 00:04:14,880 Speaker 1: was on it and then I left and then I 86 00:04:14,920 --> 00:04:18,919 Speaker 1: came back. Okay, why did you leave? I left because 87 00:04:18,960 --> 00:04:21,360 Speaker 1: it had just changed and my kids were at an 88 00:04:21,400 --> 00:04:23,720 Speaker 1: age where, you know, it's like sort of an awkward 89 00:04:23,800 --> 00:04:26,840 Speaker 1: stage and just the universe. I've become really good at 90 00:04:26,839 --> 00:04:29,920 Speaker 1: listening to the universe when they're telling me yes or no, 91 00:04:30,480 --> 00:04:33,320 Speaker 1: because when I haven't listened, it hasn't gone well. And 92 00:04:33,400 --> 00:04:36,000 Speaker 1: it was really time to go. So I left, and 93 00:04:36,080 --> 00:04:38,599 Speaker 1: I left for four seasons, but with the pandemic it 94 00:04:38,680 --> 00:04:41,159 Speaker 1: turned into five years. So when I went back to 95 00:04:41,200 --> 00:04:43,640 Speaker 1: the show, it was literally ten years from the date 96 00:04:43,720 --> 00:04:48,320 Speaker 1: I joined, which was, yes, a decade later, completely different person. 97 00:04:48,720 --> 00:04:51,400 Speaker 1: But I came back to the show because I really 98 00:04:51,520 --> 00:04:54,880 Speaker 1: thought I could use the platform to start conversations in 99 00:04:54,960 --> 00:04:57,919 Speaker 1: other people's families. Because we have four kids, there are 100 00:04:57,920 --> 00:05:01,440 Speaker 1: different genders, different sexualities, and all with things. And I 101 00:05:01,480 --> 00:05:05,440 Speaker 1: got so many messages from kids and parents, some really 102 00:05:05,480 --> 00:05:08,040 Speaker 1: wonderful and some so tragic of things that had happened 103 00:05:08,040 --> 00:05:10,000 Speaker 1: in their families. And I thought, Okay, if we just 104 00:05:10,040 --> 00:05:14,599 Speaker 1: put our incredibly normal family, people have something to model, 105 00:05:14,640 --> 00:05:16,280 Speaker 1: they have something to look at. 106 00:05:16,440 --> 00:05:19,360 Speaker 2: Yeah, you just did an interview, I think with today 107 00:05:19,680 --> 00:05:23,599 Speaker 2: dot com about the diversity within your own family and 108 00:05:23,640 --> 00:05:25,600 Speaker 2: what an impact that has had on so many by 109 00:05:25,640 --> 00:05:26,680 Speaker 2: you just talking about it. 110 00:05:27,160 --> 00:05:29,560 Speaker 1: Yeah, and even just being there. So I had a 111 00:05:29,600 --> 00:05:32,720 Speaker 1: friend in high school that I was friendly with. We 112 00:05:32,720 --> 00:05:35,520 Speaker 1: weren't like great friends. We were friendly, and we've become 113 00:05:35,760 --> 00:05:39,240 Speaker 1: very good friends later in life. And this friend told 114 00:05:39,320 --> 00:05:43,479 Speaker 1: me that they, well, they're gay. And they told me 115 00:05:43,640 --> 00:05:47,719 Speaker 1: that they didn't understand being gay when we were in 116 00:05:47,800 --> 00:05:50,960 Speaker 1: high school because they didn't have any role models on 117 00:05:51,000 --> 00:05:54,200 Speaker 1: TV or in movies, nothing to look at. And they 118 00:05:54,240 --> 00:05:57,120 Speaker 1: told me that they had decided that by the time 119 00:05:57,160 --> 00:06:00,800 Speaker 1: they were a senior, if things had gotten better for them, 120 00:06:00,839 --> 00:06:05,240 Speaker 1: they were going to take their own lives. And I 121 00:06:05,720 --> 00:06:08,240 Speaker 1: never would have thought in a million years that this 122 00:06:08,360 --> 00:06:12,920 Speaker 1: incredibly confident person that I knew and now know would 123 00:06:12,960 --> 00:06:15,960 Speaker 1: have ever felt that way. But it's because they just 124 00:06:16,000 --> 00:06:19,640 Speaker 1: didn't have anything to say. This is who you are, 125 00:06:19,760 --> 00:06:22,680 Speaker 1: it's okay, it's okay. And so I thought, I don't 126 00:06:22,680 --> 00:06:24,599 Speaker 1: have to get on a soapbox. I don't have to 127 00:06:24,640 --> 00:06:26,560 Speaker 1: use my children as storylines. I don't have to tell 128 00:06:26,560 --> 00:06:28,839 Speaker 1: their stories for them. I don't have to do anything. 129 00:06:28,920 --> 00:06:33,240 Speaker 1: We just have to be be who you are, authentic. Yeah, 130 00:06:32,839 --> 00:06:36,520 Speaker 1: and that helps people, and it does. And I've been 131 00:06:36,520 --> 00:06:38,720 Speaker 1: able to do things on the show, like through an 132 00:06:38,720 --> 00:06:42,080 Speaker 1: event last year on the show for family equality and 133 00:06:42,400 --> 00:06:44,800 Speaker 1: presented at the GLAD Awards this year. We're doing something 134 00:06:44,800 --> 00:06:47,440 Speaker 1: with the Trevor Project and being able to do that 135 00:06:47,520 --> 00:06:51,360 Speaker 1: kind of thing and using the platform for that is amazing. Yeah. 136 00:06:51,400 --> 00:06:53,480 Speaker 2: Yeah, I've heard other women say that too, that it's 137 00:06:53,480 --> 00:06:55,240 Speaker 2: because of the platform that they were able to. 138 00:06:55,320 --> 00:06:59,000 Speaker 1: Yeah, and there's nothing wrong with using the platform for fame, fortune, 139 00:07:00,120 --> 00:07:02,559 Speaker 1: you know, whatever floats your boat, Like, that's totally fine. 140 00:07:02,600 --> 00:07:06,279 Speaker 1: But me coming back into this situation, that's what it's 141 00:07:06,279 --> 00:07:06,839 Speaker 1: been for me. 142 00:07:07,440 --> 00:07:09,760 Speaker 2: I think that's such a brave choice, but not so 143 00:07:09,840 --> 00:07:12,200 Speaker 2: much brave because it's just your family. 144 00:07:12,880 --> 00:07:15,400 Speaker 1: Yeah, And I just I feel like I've been given 145 00:07:15,480 --> 00:07:18,200 Speaker 1: these kids for a reason. We were talking before on 146 00:07:18,240 --> 00:07:20,120 Speaker 1: my podcast, like I didn't or maybe it was even 147 00:07:20,160 --> 00:07:23,200 Speaker 1: before we started recording, you know, I started late. I 148 00:07:23,200 --> 00:07:28,360 Speaker 1: didn't know we'd have four kids. And it's just interesting 149 00:07:28,600 --> 00:07:33,120 Speaker 1: what life gives you. And then you think, why. 150 00:07:33,080 --> 00:07:35,160 Speaker 2: Tell me about that though, Tell me about you were 151 00:07:35,200 --> 00:07:38,120 Speaker 2: an actress full time, that was your jam, you were 152 00:07:38,120 --> 00:07:41,040 Speaker 2: doing it, you were killing it, you'd been doing a 153 00:07:41,080 --> 00:07:44,720 Speaker 2: lot of work, and then you had a baby. 154 00:07:45,360 --> 00:07:49,080 Speaker 1: So I yes. So my last show was a show 155 00:07:49,120 --> 00:07:51,160 Speaker 1: called That's Life. It was on CBS. I started the 156 00:07:51,200 --> 00:07:52,800 Speaker 1: show and it was like one of the shows you 157 00:07:52,840 --> 00:07:56,720 Speaker 1: and I were talking about, which is seventeen hours on set. 158 00:07:56,800 --> 00:07:59,080 Speaker 1: You're up at three thirty in the morning. There's no 159 00:07:59,120 --> 00:08:02,600 Speaker 1: social life. Xhausted. And I loved every second of it, 160 00:08:03,000 --> 00:08:08,800 Speaker 1: every second. And that show got canceled and I was 161 00:08:08,840 --> 00:08:11,680 Speaker 1: in pilot season and figuring it out. You know, We've 162 00:08:11,720 --> 00:08:14,840 Speaker 1: been trying to get pregnant. We had infertility and whatever, 163 00:08:14,880 --> 00:08:17,160 Speaker 1: and I was like, I need a break after going 164 00:08:17,200 --> 00:08:19,080 Speaker 1: to the fertility doctor and doing all the things. How 165 00:08:19,120 --> 00:08:23,560 Speaker 1: old are you thirty four? Okay, right? And so I 166 00:08:24,640 --> 00:08:26,960 Speaker 1: took a little break and then we were like, fuck it, 167 00:08:27,040 --> 00:08:29,240 Speaker 1: let's we're gonna do. We have to do IVF. That 168 00:08:29,400 --> 00:08:31,080 Speaker 1: was the next step that they told us, because we 169 00:08:31,080 --> 00:08:32,640 Speaker 1: had done all these you know, I UIs and all 170 00:08:32,640 --> 00:08:34,920 Speaker 1: these other things whatever. So I put it off and 171 00:08:34,960 --> 00:08:37,040 Speaker 1: then finally I go, let's do it. And of course 172 00:08:37,160 --> 00:08:40,640 Speaker 1: the day I schedule, you know, to have my embryos 173 00:08:40,679 --> 00:08:44,040 Speaker 1: and my eggs extracted, I think for the IVF, I 174 00:08:44,120 --> 00:08:49,559 Speaker 1: get a network test and I literally went to the 175 00:08:49,600 --> 00:08:54,520 Speaker 1: procedure in the morning, anesthesia not fun. Woke up from 176 00:08:54,520 --> 00:08:58,640 Speaker 1: the anesthesia, took a few hours at home, put on 177 00:08:58,679 --> 00:09:02,520 Speaker 1: my makeup, had a driver because I wasn't gonna drive, 178 00:09:03,320 --> 00:09:05,880 Speaker 1: and went to the network test, did not get the part. 179 00:09:05,920 --> 00:09:07,520 Speaker 1: I would like to tell you it's not a great ending. 180 00:09:07,559 --> 00:09:11,319 Speaker 1: But the great ending is I got pregnant. So yeah, 181 00:09:11,400 --> 00:09:14,959 Speaker 1: that took. And you know, it's funny because sometimes you 182 00:09:14,960 --> 00:09:16,960 Speaker 1: don't even know what to wish for, you know, like 183 00:09:17,240 --> 00:09:19,200 Speaker 1: you want the part, I want the baby, but you 184 00:09:19,240 --> 00:09:22,600 Speaker 1: were really keeping things open. You were like, yeah, see 185 00:09:22,600 --> 00:09:25,480 Speaker 1: what happens, let's roll the dice. And so I ended 186 00:09:25,559 --> 00:09:30,440 Speaker 1: up getting pregnant with twins. Oh yeah, And I got 187 00:09:30,520 --> 00:09:32,440 Speaker 1: pregnant with the twins, and we were living in LA 188 00:09:32,640 --> 00:09:35,840 Speaker 1: and you know, the rest is sort of history. 189 00:09:36,120 --> 00:09:39,400 Speaker 2: I love that you are very honest, You're a very 190 00:09:39,440 --> 00:09:43,960 Speaker 2: straight shooter, and you have good advice, Like I've already 191 00:09:44,160 --> 00:09:46,480 Speaker 2: had things that I'm going to go and check out 192 00:09:47,440 --> 00:09:50,360 Speaker 2: that we talked about. Well, what did we talked about earlier? 193 00:09:50,800 --> 00:09:53,760 Speaker 2: Not unpacking your suitcase right in a hotel room. 194 00:09:53,840 --> 00:09:56,760 Speaker 1: Yes, well, you have to be careful of the upholstery 195 00:09:57,240 --> 00:09:59,080 Speaker 1: because of bed books. Yes, got to watch for the 196 00:09:59,080 --> 00:10:01,440 Speaker 1: bed books. That is just so gross, and but it's 197 00:10:01,760 --> 00:10:04,800 Speaker 1: it's so gross. But we had bedbugs. Want a small 198 00:10:05,160 --> 00:10:07,760 Speaker 1: is what happened? We were we had just moved into 199 00:10:07,760 --> 00:10:11,320 Speaker 1: this house and I had this beautiful headboard made by 200 00:10:11,320 --> 00:10:16,520 Speaker 1: a local upholsterer from my daughter who was three, and 201 00:10:16,559 --> 00:10:20,960 Speaker 1: it was this pink, beautiful upholstered headboard with diamonds in it. 202 00:10:21,120 --> 00:10:24,360 Speaker 1: It was so cute and it was a local person 203 00:10:24,360 --> 00:10:26,319 Speaker 1: and I just said, hey, I bought the fabrics. I 204 00:10:26,360 --> 00:10:28,600 Speaker 1: don't know. That room came together last for some reason, 205 00:10:29,240 --> 00:10:33,680 Speaker 1: and I guess he made it in his little ware. Anyway, 206 00:10:34,360 --> 00:10:36,840 Speaker 1: there were bed bugs because my little cute girl, with 207 00:10:36,840 --> 00:10:38,840 Speaker 1: her little chubby cheeks, she'd wake up in the morning 208 00:10:38,840 --> 00:10:41,520 Speaker 1: and have all these bites on her face. And I 209 00:10:41,600 --> 00:10:43,760 Speaker 1: was like, what is going on? And then of course 210 00:10:43,760 --> 00:10:45,560 Speaker 1: we're looking it up. I'm looking it up, and if 211 00:10:45,559 --> 00:10:47,520 Speaker 1: they're in a line, they say it's bed bugs. And 212 00:10:47,520 --> 00:10:49,240 Speaker 1: now I'm freaking out because if you look to see 213 00:10:49,280 --> 00:10:50,599 Speaker 1: how you have to get rid of bed bugs, you 214 00:10:50,640 --> 00:10:53,920 Speaker 1: might as well just burn everything and leave. It's just 215 00:10:54,040 --> 00:10:58,839 Speaker 1: it's a disaster. So I call this company that someone 216 00:10:58,840 --> 00:11:01,440 Speaker 1: told me to call, and there's a dog that they 217 00:11:01,480 --> 00:11:06,240 Speaker 1: have come to your house to sniff out the bed bugs. Okay, 218 00:11:06,480 --> 00:11:08,360 Speaker 1: So I'm like, all right, So I call the place 219 00:11:08,679 --> 00:11:12,960 Speaker 1: and they and I'm expecting like a doberman, like some 220 00:11:13,280 --> 00:11:18,920 Speaker 1: big gnarly bug seeking thing. I open the door and 221 00:11:19,040 --> 00:11:21,520 Speaker 1: it is I am not kidding a poodle. It is 222 00:11:21,559 --> 00:11:23,640 Speaker 1: a small poodle. 223 00:11:23,520 --> 00:11:23,800 Speaker 2: That is. 224 00:11:24,080 --> 00:11:26,959 Speaker 1: And the person with the lesion, I'm like, really, it's 225 00:11:27,000 --> 00:11:29,800 Speaker 1: a poodle. Poodles go all right? So they bring the 226 00:11:29,840 --> 00:11:33,000 Speaker 1: dog in the house, and the dog they bring him upstairs. 227 00:11:33,000 --> 00:11:36,400 Speaker 1: The dog is upstairs, immediately goes to the headboard, to 228 00:11:36,440 --> 00:11:39,320 Speaker 1: the headboard, starts stiffing around. They take the headboard out, 229 00:11:39,520 --> 00:11:41,920 Speaker 1: they take it out to their truck. They slice it 230 00:11:41,960 --> 00:11:45,720 Speaker 1: open and there's bedbugs. So now they take the dog 231 00:11:45,840 --> 00:11:48,400 Speaker 1: back up to the room and the dog doesn't find anything. 232 00:11:49,160 --> 00:11:51,680 Speaker 1: Because I'm like, do I take the mattress out? Do 233 00:11:51,760 --> 00:11:53,240 Speaker 1: I call the guy? What happened? 234 00:11:53,800 --> 00:11:53,880 Speaker 2: No? 235 00:11:53,960 --> 00:11:57,240 Speaker 1: I just never used him again. I would think you 236 00:11:57,280 --> 00:11:59,240 Speaker 1: would have at least called him. And I think he 237 00:11:59,320 --> 00:12:02,360 Speaker 1: knows he has been bugs. How does he not know 238 00:12:02,520 --> 00:12:07,200 Speaker 1: he's infested with bed bugs? It was so gross, It 239 00:12:07,280 --> 00:12:09,640 Speaker 1: was so disgusting. But anyways, that sounds or disgusted. I 240 00:12:09,640 --> 00:12:11,040 Speaker 1: had to get her a new headboard, but I did. 241 00:12:17,440 --> 00:12:18,960 Speaker 2: I want to ask you a question, what is the 242 00:12:18,960 --> 00:12:22,440 Speaker 2: best advice you've ever been given? Oh, that's a big question. 243 00:12:22,520 --> 00:12:27,840 Speaker 1: I know that is a big question the best advice, 244 00:12:28,600 --> 00:12:34,080 Speaker 1: I mean, there's different categories of advice. I think. I 245 00:12:34,120 --> 00:12:37,160 Speaker 1: think one thing that sticks out in my mind is 246 00:12:37,200 --> 00:12:41,880 Speaker 1: that my mom told me, well, two things. My mom 247 00:12:41,960 --> 00:12:43,840 Speaker 1: told me two things that I thought were very very good. 248 00:12:43,880 --> 00:12:46,360 Speaker 1: One was be careful who you date because you can 249 00:12:46,400 --> 00:12:50,040 Speaker 1: fall in love with anyone. Okay, good advice, which really 250 00:12:50,080 --> 00:12:52,920 Speaker 1: is good advice because you know what, like all humans 251 00:12:52,960 --> 00:12:55,920 Speaker 1: have beautiful qualities, and yeah, you can find all the 252 00:12:55,920 --> 00:12:58,960 Speaker 1: good qualities. Yeah, and you can look yes, yeah. And 253 00:12:59,160 --> 00:13:02,079 Speaker 1: when you if you have a life, pat you have 254 00:13:02,280 --> 00:13:06,400 Speaker 1: things in your life that are important to you, and like, like, 255 00:13:06,600 --> 00:13:08,040 Speaker 1: all right, just off the top of my head, you 256 00:13:08,080 --> 00:13:11,280 Speaker 1: want children, right, and you meet someone who absolutely does 257 00:13:11,360 --> 00:13:14,200 Speaker 1: not want children, you should not date that person. That 258 00:13:14,320 --> 00:13:16,800 Speaker 1: is a red flag because you will never convince this 259 00:13:16,880 --> 00:13:20,280 Speaker 1: person to have children. It'll never be harmonious. No, no, 260 00:13:20,400 --> 00:13:22,800 Speaker 1: you can't do that, So be careful who you do. Okay, good, 261 00:13:22,840 --> 00:13:26,080 Speaker 1: That was that's number one, right, And then number two, 262 00:13:26,480 --> 00:13:28,400 Speaker 1: and this one I think is very very important is 263 00:13:28,440 --> 00:13:32,680 Speaker 1: to have friends of all ages and all stages of life. 264 00:13:33,520 --> 00:13:37,480 Speaker 1: Because you know, when you're younger, obviously you're friends with 265 00:13:37,559 --> 00:13:41,840 Speaker 1: people your age. It's developmental when you're super young. It's 266 00:13:42,720 --> 00:13:44,079 Speaker 1: I can't think of the word I'm trying to look 267 00:13:44,120 --> 00:13:45,640 Speaker 1: for right now. But it's like, you know, you're in 268 00:13:45,679 --> 00:13:48,640 Speaker 1: a certain grade of school when you're older, or a 269 00:13:48,679 --> 00:13:51,800 Speaker 1: certain you know, a part of your life where you're 270 00:13:51,840 --> 00:13:55,200 Speaker 1: in college, so you're friends with college people, or you've 271 00:13:55,280 --> 00:13:58,439 Speaker 1: just you know, you're graduated, and your bubble can get 272 00:13:58,440 --> 00:14:02,240 Speaker 1: really too small. Yeah. And it's funny because I remember 273 00:14:02,520 --> 00:14:05,360 Speaker 1: when I was younger saying to my mom, Oh my gosh, 274 00:14:05,440 --> 00:14:08,480 Speaker 1: your friends, that couple that your friends with there so old, 275 00:14:08,640 --> 00:14:11,080 Speaker 1: Like why are you friends with them? And she said 276 00:14:11,080 --> 00:14:14,319 Speaker 1: to me, no, it's so good. They have a different perspective. 277 00:14:14,880 --> 00:14:18,160 Speaker 1: And so I have always made sure I have people 278 00:14:18,200 --> 00:14:21,760 Speaker 1: in my life that are older and that are younger. 279 00:14:21,880 --> 00:14:24,240 Speaker 1: I was, you know, recently when we moved back to 280 00:14:24,360 --> 00:14:26,560 Speaker 1: la you know, we were talking about going back to 281 00:14:26,560 --> 00:14:29,000 Speaker 1: scripted work, you and I recently, which I really do 282 00:14:29,080 --> 00:14:32,680 Speaker 1: want to do my own terms, as we both discussed, 283 00:14:32,680 --> 00:14:34,760 Speaker 1: and what makes sense for my life now. So I 284 00:14:34,880 --> 00:14:37,680 Speaker 1: joined the Groundlings, and I audition to the Groundlings, got 285 00:14:37,680 --> 00:14:39,680 Speaker 1: in and started taking class with the Groundlings. Oh my gosh, 286 00:14:39,760 --> 00:14:44,040 Speaker 1: you're so brave. You should do with me. Wow, I 287 00:14:44,040 --> 00:14:46,840 Speaker 1: can't even answer that. No, you should come take a class. Okay, wait, 288 00:14:46,920 --> 00:14:48,960 Speaker 1: just tell me what it's like first. It's I'm gonna 289 00:14:49,000 --> 00:14:50,360 Speaker 1: get back to that a second. But here's what I'm 290 00:14:50,360 --> 00:14:52,120 Speaker 1: going to tell you. I took the Groundings, and I 291 00:14:52,120 --> 00:14:54,240 Speaker 1: did it with a girlfriend of mine, also an actress. 292 00:14:54,320 --> 00:14:56,400 Speaker 1: You might hurt, but my friend Dina, who we've been 293 00:14:56,400 --> 00:14:58,800 Speaker 1: friends for a million years, and not only do we 294 00:14:58,800 --> 00:15:01,360 Speaker 1: have the best time, it was all I call them kids. 295 00:15:01,400 --> 00:15:03,640 Speaker 1: They were all the kids in the class. They were kids, 296 00:15:03,840 --> 00:15:06,840 Speaker 1: and they were great, and we'd go out with them, 297 00:15:06,920 --> 00:15:09,600 Speaker 1: we had dinners with them, we'd go to drinks. We'd 298 00:15:09,640 --> 00:15:12,040 Speaker 1: be like we were joking, like smoking a cigarette, like 299 00:15:12,080 --> 00:15:15,080 Speaker 1: we don't smoke anymore, but you know, like, oh, darlings, 300 00:15:15,320 --> 00:15:17,960 Speaker 1: in the few days, you were the old people. We 301 00:15:18,040 --> 00:15:20,600 Speaker 1: were the old people. They were the young people. It 302 00:15:20,640 --> 00:15:23,520 Speaker 1: was but you know what, I didn't feel any different 303 00:15:24,240 --> 00:15:28,280 Speaker 1: than they were at all, right, And it was unbelievably 304 00:15:28,360 --> 00:15:31,080 Speaker 1: fun and honestly, like I ended up doing this little 305 00:15:31,120 --> 00:15:33,040 Speaker 1: musical thing with one of them because she wrote this 306 00:15:33,120 --> 00:15:37,800 Speaker 1: show like it was just such an interesting fun Yeah, 307 00:15:37,840 --> 00:15:42,280 Speaker 1: really bold, fucking scary thing to do. But I'm sort 308 00:15:42,280 --> 00:15:44,280 Speaker 1: of in that mindset. I really encourage you to do 309 00:15:44,320 --> 00:15:46,800 Speaker 1: this too. Like I just started taking so I started 310 00:15:46,800 --> 00:15:48,800 Speaker 1: as a musical theater person. I was a singer and 311 00:15:48,880 --> 00:15:51,160 Speaker 1: a fourteen piece big band that I toured with fears. 312 00:15:52,160 --> 00:15:57,600 Speaker 1: I'm taking vocal lessons again. It's terrifying. I love this though. 313 00:15:57,680 --> 00:16:00,400 Speaker 2: It's a whole new You have the time now, you 314 00:16:00,440 --> 00:16:02,720 Speaker 2: are at the phase I'm like making the time. 315 00:16:02,840 --> 00:16:05,520 Speaker 1: Almost an empty nester, but I'm making the time. You're 316 00:16:05,560 --> 00:16:08,040 Speaker 1: so busy. I'm so busy. We still have the kids 317 00:16:08,040 --> 00:16:09,160 Speaker 1: even if they're not at home. 318 00:16:09,320 --> 00:16:12,280 Speaker 2: But do you feel like you're like consciously choosing what 319 00:16:12,320 --> 00:16:13,880 Speaker 2: it is that you want to take the time and do, 320 00:16:14,200 --> 00:16:16,560 Speaker 2: like making those brave decisions and choices. 321 00:16:16,920 --> 00:16:20,760 Speaker 1: I'm seeing what fits so Okay. So I like, like, 322 00:16:20,840 --> 00:16:23,240 Speaker 1: I can't take the next Groundlings class right now because 323 00:16:23,280 --> 00:16:26,040 Speaker 1: I have other obligations right so I'm putting it off 324 00:16:26,120 --> 00:16:28,960 Speaker 1: until May, and I'll do the next one in May. 325 00:16:28,960 --> 00:16:30,200 Speaker 1: But I know in my mind it would do that. 326 00:16:30,240 --> 00:16:32,840 Speaker 1: So I'm like, Okay, what day do I free and 327 00:16:32,880 --> 00:16:35,600 Speaker 1: what do I need to prioritize here? Okay, and then 328 00:16:35,600 --> 00:16:38,360 Speaker 1: I'll try something and if it fills me and feeds 329 00:16:38,400 --> 00:16:40,960 Speaker 1: my soul, I do it and if it doesn't, I'm out. 330 00:16:41,760 --> 00:16:43,920 Speaker 1: You don't need to waste time because you know the 331 00:16:43,960 --> 00:16:45,600 Speaker 1: you don't need to waste time. And didn't you feel 332 00:16:45,640 --> 00:16:48,480 Speaker 1: like when you hit fifty it was like I got 333 00:16:48,520 --> 00:16:53,000 Speaker 1: nothing to lose. Right, it's halftime, yep. Got to gather 334 00:16:53,080 --> 00:16:55,120 Speaker 1: the troops, put them in the locker room and go, Okay, 335 00:16:55,160 --> 00:16:57,520 Speaker 1: what do we do well last court? Last half? What 336 00:16:57,800 --> 00:17:01,000 Speaker 1: didn't we do well? We gotta move forward and there's 337 00:17:01,040 --> 00:17:04,120 Speaker 1: something different. Yeah, there's no more time to like stress 338 00:17:04,160 --> 00:17:08,280 Speaker 1: about it or feel upset about things that didn't go well. Right, 339 00:17:08,280 --> 00:17:10,320 Speaker 1: I just keep moving forward. You have to keep moving forward. 340 00:17:10,400 --> 00:17:12,840 Speaker 1: I'm not always good at this, but I'm really trying 341 00:17:12,880 --> 00:17:17,399 Speaker 1: to consciously make sure that every day. Like sometimes you 342 00:17:17,440 --> 00:17:19,480 Speaker 1: know when you wake up in the morning and you go, oh, 343 00:17:19,480 --> 00:17:22,760 Speaker 1: what do I have to do today? I go, what 344 00:17:22,880 --> 00:17:25,080 Speaker 1: do I get to do today? I go what do 345 00:17:25,119 --> 00:17:27,240 Speaker 1: I get to do today? And even if it sucks, 346 00:17:27,520 --> 00:17:30,040 Speaker 1: I'm trying to find like something within the day. Like 347 00:17:30,080 --> 00:17:33,520 Speaker 1: I'm obsessed with plates right now. Oh that's a good obsession. Yeah. 348 00:17:33,520 --> 00:17:35,480 Speaker 1: I used to be into running and all these things, 349 00:17:35,480 --> 00:17:38,000 Speaker 1: but my body can't handle it anymore. So you know 350 00:17:38,080 --> 00:17:41,200 Speaker 1: what that's Okay, I've realized that there's different ages and 351 00:17:41,240 --> 00:17:44,680 Speaker 1: stages for fitness also, right, And now I'm obsessed with pilates. 352 00:17:45,119 --> 00:17:47,080 Speaker 1: I love it and I love this place I go, 353 00:17:47,200 --> 00:17:49,640 Speaker 1: and it makes me happy when I'm there. So even 354 00:17:49,680 --> 00:17:51,640 Speaker 1: if that's the only great thing, that's how I'm gonna 355 00:17:51,640 --> 00:17:52,080 Speaker 1: start my day. 356 00:17:52,760 --> 00:17:55,199 Speaker 2: It's hard to say I get to go to the 357 00:17:55,240 --> 00:17:57,040 Speaker 2: gym today, all right. 358 00:17:56,840 --> 00:17:59,199 Speaker 1: If you hate it, but you could say no, I 359 00:17:59,240 --> 00:18:01,600 Speaker 1: get it. I used to hate it too. I had 360 00:18:02,240 --> 00:18:04,840 Speaker 1: a switch with it a number of years ago because 361 00:18:04,880 --> 00:18:07,880 Speaker 1: I never was a workout person. I never liked it. 362 00:18:08,800 --> 00:18:13,040 Speaker 1: Had to hate hate hate. But then when like orange 363 00:18:13,080 --> 00:18:16,960 Speaker 1: theory became a thing, I started going there and I 364 00:18:17,000 --> 00:18:19,960 Speaker 1: really developed a love for like running and the hit 365 00:18:20,000 --> 00:18:23,000 Speaker 1: thing and whatever. But my body started breaking down from 366 00:18:23,040 --> 00:18:25,679 Speaker 1: that kind of exercise after a decade of that. So 367 00:18:25,760 --> 00:18:28,119 Speaker 1: now I'm into this and this is great for your body, 368 00:18:28,119 --> 00:18:30,040 Speaker 1: and it's you know what, you get to lie down 369 00:18:30,119 --> 00:18:33,119 Speaker 1: for half the class. I really highly recommend me. I 370 00:18:33,200 --> 00:18:35,840 Speaker 1: know it's dark. It's like dark too. There's this like 371 00:18:36,040 --> 00:18:39,359 Speaker 1: hot mat class that I go to. It's so good. 372 00:18:39,520 --> 00:18:41,400 Speaker 1: I thought you were going to say something about the instructor, 373 00:18:41,440 --> 00:18:45,520 Speaker 1: but okay, oh, the mat. No, there's no hot instructor, 374 00:18:45,640 --> 00:18:48,520 Speaker 1: no class. I mean it's usually women, which are women, 375 00:18:48,640 --> 00:18:51,320 Speaker 1: they are hot, but like, yeah, yeah, I'm not looking 376 00:18:51,320 --> 00:18:54,680 Speaker 1: for that. No, so anyway, so yeah. So But even 377 00:18:54,720 --> 00:18:57,639 Speaker 1: if it's not that, you have to build something into 378 00:18:57,680 --> 00:19:02,919 Speaker 1: your day, even if it's you or like frothed coffee 379 00:19:03,400 --> 00:19:07,199 Speaker 1: that you love that you sit and you scroll, or 380 00:19:07,280 --> 00:19:10,640 Speaker 1: you whatever it is that you that guilty pleasure thing 381 00:19:10,720 --> 00:19:13,280 Speaker 1: that you do, you got to focus on that thing. Yep, 382 00:19:13,440 --> 00:19:14,040 Speaker 1: that's so true. 383 00:19:14,160 --> 00:19:18,040 Speaker 2: Have you ever given advice to someone who didn't want it, like, 384 00:19:18,320 --> 00:19:19,600 Speaker 2: and that backfired for you? 385 00:19:19,680 --> 00:19:22,760 Speaker 1: Oh? I'm sure a million times that's happened. I really, 386 00:19:23,880 --> 00:19:27,320 Speaker 1: What do you mean? You're sure? Because because I'm so outspoken, 387 00:19:27,800 --> 00:19:30,520 Speaker 1: you know, and when I was younger, I'm sure I 388 00:19:30,600 --> 00:19:33,679 Speaker 1: felt like, if I'm perfectly honest, that I knew better 389 00:19:34,400 --> 00:19:37,520 Speaker 1: than someone else did and had the best advice. I 390 00:19:37,560 --> 00:19:42,600 Speaker 1: think I've become much better at listening as I've gotten older. Yeah, 391 00:19:42,920 --> 00:19:45,520 Speaker 1: reading the room maybe, and reading the room and not 392 00:19:45,640 --> 00:19:48,480 Speaker 1: being so verbose about things sometimes. You know, it's okay 393 00:19:48,520 --> 00:19:52,119 Speaker 1: to not tell everyone exactly you want, you think, but 394 00:19:52,760 --> 00:19:56,200 Speaker 1: if someone asks for my opinion, I'm happy to give 395 00:19:56,240 --> 00:19:59,760 Speaker 1: it right, there's a difference. There is a difference. Yes, 396 00:20:00,240 --> 00:20:03,000 Speaker 1: if someone comes to you and asks for advice, they 397 00:20:03,080 --> 00:20:07,240 Speaker 1: want your expertise on something, they want your perspective. Yeah, 398 00:20:07,240 --> 00:20:09,040 Speaker 1: And if they don't like it, then they really didn't 399 00:20:09,040 --> 00:20:11,400 Speaker 1: want it in the first place, and then that's fucked right. Well. 400 00:20:11,400 --> 00:20:13,919 Speaker 1: And also they if they don't take your advice like 401 00:20:13,960 --> 00:20:15,760 Speaker 1: they don't, well they don't have. 402 00:20:15,680 --> 00:20:17,080 Speaker 2: To take they don't have to take it, but it'd 403 00:20:17,080 --> 00:20:19,200 Speaker 2: be better for them if they did, right. 404 00:20:19,280 --> 00:20:20,919 Speaker 1: But I mean, don't you say that with your kids? Sometimes, 405 00:20:20,960 --> 00:20:22,200 Speaker 1: like my eighteen year old will come to you and 406 00:20:22,280 --> 00:20:25,520 Speaker 1: be like mom, and then ask me this whole thing, 407 00:20:25,560 --> 00:20:28,359 Speaker 1: and I'll listen, and I'll think to myself, what does 408 00:20:28,400 --> 00:20:32,320 Speaker 1: she want mess here? But then I'll give my honest 409 00:20:32,359 --> 00:20:38,439 Speaker 1: advice and then she'll say yeah, no, no. But what 410 00:20:38,480 --> 00:20:40,760 Speaker 1: I do notice is it will still make her think. 411 00:20:40,960 --> 00:20:43,359 Speaker 1: It'll be in the back of her mind, yes, and 412 00:20:43,680 --> 00:20:46,840 Speaker 1: it might inform right she ends up course, of course, 413 00:20:47,040 --> 00:20:48,119 Speaker 1: but they'll never admit it. 414 00:20:48,280 --> 00:20:57,440 Speaker 2: No. What about this marriage of yours? You have been 415 00:20:57,480 --> 00:21:02,000 Speaker 2: married to the same man, sorry, because that's not the 416 00:21:02,000 --> 00:21:02,560 Speaker 2: case for me. 417 00:21:03,240 --> 00:21:09,119 Speaker 1: The same man over every day every day. How do 418 00:21:09,160 --> 00:21:09,720 Speaker 1: you do it? 419 00:21:10,280 --> 00:21:14,240 Speaker 2: Like I love change, and I feel like I've changed 420 00:21:14,280 --> 00:21:17,119 Speaker 2: my husband's a few times and that's been really fun. 421 00:21:17,440 --> 00:21:19,840 Speaker 1: But how do you stay with the same man for 422 00:21:20,440 --> 00:21:24,880 Speaker 1: twenty four we're together twenty eight years? Twenty eight Yeah, 423 00:21:24,920 --> 00:21:29,959 Speaker 1: we've been married twenty five and a half. Yeah, marriage 424 00:21:30,040 --> 00:21:33,080 Speaker 1: is hard work. I will say, you know we met 425 00:21:33,359 --> 00:21:35,040 Speaker 1: we didn't. I mean we met when I was twenty 426 00:21:35,119 --> 00:21:38,840 Speaker 1: seven and he was thirty eight, so it's I wasn't 427 00:21:38,840 --> 00:21:42,200 Speaker 1: twenty two. We got married when I was thirty Again, 428 00:21:42,440 --> 00:21:46,480 Speaker 1: wasn't twenty two. Now I can give you a million 429 00:21:46,560 --> 00:21:50,159 Speaker 1: reasons why I think we're together. I think the honest 430 00:21:50,160 --> 00:21:52,480 Speaker 1: to God truth is marriage is a leap of faith 431 00:21:52,880 --> 00:21:56,440 Speaker 1: and you have absolutely no idea what you're getting into 432 00:21:56,600 --> 00:21:59,800 Speaker 1: until you get into it. Nope, yep, at all you have. 433 00:22:00,080 --> 00:22:02,199 Speaker 1: You have the best of intentions, and that's why if 434 00:22:02,200 --> 00:22:04,840 Speaker 1: there are red flags before you're walking down the aisle, 435 00:22:05,240 --> 00:22:06,000 Speaker 1: do not do it. 436 00:22:06,240 --> 00:22:08,840 Speaker 2: No. I know it's hard to do though. Sometimes there's 437 00:22:08,840 --> 00:22:12,439 Speaker 2: a few little red flags. Maybe they're pink, I know. 438 00:22:12,560 --> 00:22:14,720 Speaker 1: But that's why I hate when I hear people get 439 00:22:14,800 --> 00:22:21,000 Speaker 1: married fast, and I don't understand why people rush into marriage. Yeah, 440 00:22:21,000 --> 00:22:22,959 Speaker 1: and the truth is, when you have a child with 441 00:22:23,000 --> 00:22:27,280 Speaker 1: someone as you know, that's the forever moment. Marriage is 442 00:22:27,320 --> 00:22:30,280 Speaker 1: not necessarily forever, right. I don't understand why people like 443 00:22:30,320 --> 00:22:31,879 Speaker 1: they meet, they want to rush, they want to get 444 00:22:31,920 --> 00:22:34,720 Speaker 1: into it. I will tell you that there's certain moments 445 00:22:34,760 --> 00:22:37,840 Speaker 1: in a relationship you don't get back. You don't get 446 00:22:37,840 --> 00:22:40,639 Speaker 1: back the courtship period, and you don't get back the 447 00:22:40,720 --> 00:22:45,919 Speaker 1: engaged period, because it's once you're married, then you're just married. 448 00:22:46,520 --> 00:22:49,080 Speaker 1: Then it's just ticking of time. So I highly recommend 449 00:22:49,119 --> 00:22:53,320 Speaker 1: that people enjoy all of those things. And again, if 450 00:22:53,359 --> 00:22:56,440 Speaker 1: there are red flags that means it is not time 451 00:22:56,480 --> 00:22:59,320 Speaker 1: to get married, you got to figure that out. Yeah, 452 00:22:59,400 --> 00:23:02,560 Speaker 1: like dig into those red flags before you I mean 453 00:23:02,680 --> 00:23:06,040 Speaker 1: like I didn't have those red flag of course when 454 00:23:06,040 --> 00:23:08,840 Speaker 1: you're dating someone. Yeah, people you know, they urk you. 455 00:23:08,840 --> 00:23:10,879 Speaker 1: You got to figure out if you can live together, 456 00:23:11,000 --> 00:23:14,159 Speaker 1: you know, all those normal sort of things. But you know, 457 00:23:14,520 --> 00:23:16,359 Speaker 1: like we were talking about before, if someone is saying 458 00:23:16,720 --> 00:23:18,600 Speaker 1: they don't want to have kids, you want to have kids. 459 00:23:18,640 --> 00:23:20,840 Speaker 1: They don't like to travel. You like to travel. You 460 00:23:20,880 --> 00:23:24,439 Speaker 1: are very active. They're a couch potato. They like to 461 00:23:24,520 --> 00:23:29,280 Speaker 1: have guys' nights or guys weekends every weekend. You know 462 00:23:30,200 --> 00:23:32,520 Speaker 1: it depends on what's important to you. Some people like 463 00:23:32,600 --> 00:23:37,000 Speaker 1: I can't remember who I just read an actress she 464 00:23:37,280 --> 00:23:39,600 Speaker 1: just got married last year. I have to think of 465 00:23:39,600 --> 00:23:43,000 Speaker 1: her name. And she and her husband live in separate states. Huh, 466 00:23:43,040 --> 00:23:45,280 Speaker 1: and they love it and it's perfect for them. They 467 00:23:45,359 --> 00:23:49,800 Speaker 1: both have their own careers. He's maybe I don't remember 468 00:23:49,800 --> 00:23:52,080 Speaker 1: what he does, but anyway, they both have very significant 469 00:23:52,119 --> 00:23:56,119 Speaker 1: careers and they're great and when they come together, they 470 00:23:56,200 --> 00:23:58,040 Speaker 1: have the best time and they love each other. But 471 00:23:58,080 --> 00:24:01,119 Speaker 1: this is how their relationship works that model. It's not 472 00:24:01,240 --> 00:24:03,840 Speaker 1: me to judge what will or will not work for 473 00:24:03,880 --> 00:24:07,840 Speaker 1: someone else, but for me, like I could not have 474 00:24:07,880 --> 00:24:10,280 Speaker 1: been with someone that didn't want kids. That would have 475 00:24:10,280 --> 00:24:12,520 Speaker 1: been a hard note, even though again I wasn't someone 476 00:24:12,600 --> 00:24:15,280 Speaker 1: that was like dying to have children my whole life. 477 00:24:15,320 --> 00:24:18,040 Speaker 1: But I just felt like it was something I would do. 478 00:24:18,280 --> 00:24:22,159 Speaker 1: At twenty seven, you said, did you know what you're like, 479 00:24:22,320 --> 00:24:25,280 Speaker 1: what your non negotiables were? No, not at all. That's 480 00:24:25,280 --> 00:24:26,639 Speaker 1: why I'm saying it was a leap of faith. But 481 00:24:26,720 --> 00:24:28,440 Speaker 1: I think that wait, wait, wait, how long did you 482 00:24:28,440 --> 00:24:31,280 Speaker 1: wait till you got married? So we dated for a 483 00:24:31,359 --> 00:24:34,720 Speaker 1: year and a half, okay, got engaged and then we 484 00:24:34,720 --> 00:24:36,760 Speaker 1: were engaged for a year and then got married. But 485 00:24:36,800 --> 00:24:40,119 Speaker 1: remember he's ten and a half years older, so when 486 00:24:40,119 --> 00:24:43,960 Speaker 1: we got married, he was forty, so it was like 487 00:24:44,640 --> 00:24:48,000 Speaker 1: it felt okay. I think if he had been my 488 00:24:48,119 --> 00:24:50,720 Speaker 1: age or a couple years older, we probably would have 489 00:24:50,720 --> 00:24:54,439 Speaker 1: waited longer to get married. Yeah, that's what I think. 490 00:24:54,480 --> 00:24:58,880 Speaker 1: You learn a lot about I did all the things 491 00:24:58,920 --> 00:25:01,080 Speaker 1: you said we shouldn't be doing. I got married. 492 00:25:01,359 --> 00:25:03,800 Speaker 2: I got engaged three months into a relationship and married 493 00:25:03,840 --> 00:25:04,720 Speaker 2: six months and two. 494 00:25:04,840 --> 00:25:05,119 Speaker 1: Yeah. 495 00:25:05,240 --> 00:25:07,439 Speaker 2: That and you were young. And when you're that age, 496 00:25:07,600 --> 00:25:09,840 Speaker 2: it wasn't that young, this old. This was in my 497 00:25:10,080 --> 00:25:11,879 Speaker 2: early forties. This was my current. 498 00:25:12,000 --> 00:25:15,520 Speaker 1: Oh oh, this wasn't you. But you're still together. 499 00:25:15,680 --> 00:25:17,640 Speaker 2: I told you I like change. He doesn't like when 500 00:25:17,640 --> 00:25:20,040 Speaker 2: I say that because he gets little nervous. But we're 501 00:25:20,119 --> 00:25:20,719 Speaker 2: still together. 502 00:25:20,800 --> 00:25:23,320 Speaker 1: How long have you live? Been together? Ten years? That's 503 00:25:23,359 --> 00:25:28,320 Speaker 1: a long time. It's funny, I interviewed. You want to 504 00:25:28,359 --> 00:25:30,680 Speaker 1: know what's crazy. I haven't had an alcohol week two 505 00:25:30,760 --> 00:25:32,960 Speaker 1: weeks right now, and I think it's given me brain fog. 506 00:25:33,040 --> 00:25:37,560 Speaker 1: Not drinking No, no normally or Norman Lear famous Norman Lear, 507 00:25:38,000 --> 00:25:42,920 Speaker 1: adorable who passed away last year. Anyway, Norman Lear who 508 00:25:42,920 --> 00:25:45,520 Speaker 1: you know who I don't know normally er he created 509 00:25:46,880 --> 00:25:49,840 Speaker 1: a million television shows all in the family, like a 510 00:25:49,920 --> 00:25:53,520 Speaker 1: million TV shows love him, like the King of the 511 00:25:53,560 --> 00:25:56,439 Speaker 1: sitcom and he lived to like one hundred and one. Anyway, 512 00:25:56,480 --> 00:25:59,000 Speaker 1: he was on the show and we were talking and 513 00:25:59,040 --> 00:26:02,159 Speaker 1: he was talking about his failed marriages and he was 514 00:26:02,160 --> 00:26:04,280 Speaker 1: worrying about one wife in particular. When I go, how 515 00:26:04,320 --> 00:26:06,440 Speaker 1: long were you married? And he said thirty years. I go, 516 00:26:06,560 --> 00:26:10,560 Speaker 1: that's not a failed marriage. That's thirty years is a 517 00:26:10,720 --> 00:26:14,480 Speaker 1: huge long life together. When marriage was created, people didn't 518 00:26:14,520 --> 00:26:17,639 Speaker 1: live past like eighteen. I don't think it was intended 519 00:26:17,840 --> 00:26:20,200 Speaker 1: for people to be together for fifty six years. It is, 520 00:26:20,480 --> 00:26:23,480 Speaker 1: you know, not the norm for people to be together. 521 00:26:23,720 --> 00:26:27,000 Speaker 1: What do you get divorced after three like they call 522 00:26:27,040 --> 00:26:29,960 Speaker 1: it a gray divorce. It's very I just ran into 523 00:26:30,000 --> 00:26:32,240 Speaker 1: someone last night who was telling me that his parents 524 00:26:32,240 --> 00:26:36,000 Speaker 1: are getting divorced after thirty years and they're in their seventies, 525 00:26:36,040 --> 00:26:37,960 Speaker 1: and it's called it's a new thing. They're called it 526 00:26:37,960 --> 00:26:41,240 Speaker 1: a gray divorce, like gray hair. Uh huh that older 527 00:26:41,280 --> 00:26:43,960 Speaker 1: people like they just they hit a wall and they're like, 528 00:26:44,320 --> 00:26:46,080 Speaker 1: or no, I'm done. Yeah, how many years I got 529 00:26:46,160 --> 00:26:50,639 Speaker 1: left by bye, not doing with you. I love them. 530 00:26:51,240 --> 00:26:53,280 Speaker 1: That's so funny. I feel bad for your husband now 531 00:26:53,280 --> 00:26:57,840 Speaker 1: I'm worried, but I really do like this great divorce thing. Yeah, 532 00:26:57,920 --> 00:27:00,680 Speaker 1: it's always on the table, you know, a few years. 533 00:27:00,720 --> 00:27:03,879 Speaker 1: But you're well, we'll never go great. Let's be honest, 534 00:27:04,920 --> 00:27:08,320 Speaker 1: that's not really in our future. I'm gonna go white, Betty, No, 535 00:27:09,000 --> 00:27:12,840 Speaker 1: you're a gorgeous blonde. Just keep it stop. So so 536 00:27:13,440 --> 00:27:17,160 Speaker 1: we I think it's a leap of faith. I think 537 00:27:17,240 --> 00:27:21,760 Speaker 1: that we've been lucky and we have really done a 538 00:27:21,800 --> 00:27:26,840 Speaker 1: good job of upping our game decade by decade as 539 00:27:26,920 --> 00:27:31,840 Speaker 1: it's been needed. And that's been so good for us 540 00:27:32,080 --> 00:27:36,320 Speaker 1: because neither of us are like therapy kids. Like we 541 00:27:36,359 --> 00:27:39,240 Speaker 1: didn't go to therapy, our parents didn't really talk to us. 542 00:27:39,400 --> 00:27:42,320 Speaker 1: We're like flying by the seat of our pants here. 543 00:27:42,920 --> 00:27:46,679 Speaker 1: But I think both kind of you know, reasonably intelligent people, 544 00:27:47,200 --> 00:27:53,919 Speaker 1: and him for sure, Hyer Transurgeon and we separately have 545 00:27:54,640 --> 00:27:56,919 Speaker 1: come to each other at different times and been like, 546 00:27:57,080 --> 00:27:59,560 Speaker 1: look what are we doing with this? This isn't working. 547 00:28:00,240 --> 00:28:02,399 Speaker 1: You know, what's going on with you? What's going on 548 00:28:02,440 --> 00:28:06,320 Speaker 1: with us. It's really important to date your spouse and 549 00:28:06,840 --> 00:28:10,600 Speaker 1: that continue to date Terry believes in going to sleep mad. 550 00:28:11,960 --> 00:28:14,520 Speaker 1: Some people don't. Some people want to fix it before 551 00:28:15,240 --> 00:28:17,320 Speaker 1: does he explain why. He thinks that's because he thinks 552 00:28:17,359 --> 00:28:18,760 Speaker 1: the end of the night, it's a bad idea. And 553 00:28:18,760 --> 00:28:23,159 Speaker 1: he's right, you're tired, especially you've had dreams or anything. 554 00:28:23,200 --> 00:28:26,800 Speaker 1: It's just it's not the time. Yeah, daytime is better, 555 00:28:27,760 --> 00:28:31,560 Speaker 1: you know, learn how to fight healthy. Yeah, and you 556 00:28:31,560 --> 00:28:33,440 Speaker 1: have to learn each other's fighting styles and you have 557 00:28:33,480 --> 00:28:34,800 Speaker 1: to meet in the middle somewhere. Yeah. 558 00:28:34,840 --> 00:28:37,920 Speaker 2: You learn so much about a person as the years tick. 559 00:28:38,360 --> 00:28:40,520 Speaker 2: You think you know everything and then you learn something new. 560 00:28:40,680 --> 00:28:42,520 Speaker 1: Yeah. But I have to say, like, we're best friends. 561 00:28:42,560 --> 00:28:45,360 Speaker 1: We do you know, we've done We've written three books together. 562 00:28:45,480 --> 00:28:48,880 Speaker 1: We you know, it's our hobby. We've done TV shows together. 563 00:28:49,160 --> 00:28:53,240 Speaker 1: We love that we have product line together. We sell supplements. 564 00:28:53,240 --> 00:28:56,480 Speaker 2: And you're like, relationship goals. Have you ever done like 565 00:28:56,520 --> 00:28:58,640 Speaker 2: a like a couple's retreat? 566 00:28:59,240 --> 00:29:03,680 Speaker 1: No? No, like saying like bring back the fire? No? Nothing, 567 00:29:03,720 --> 00:29:06,680 Speaker 1: like like like's a host water go to to one? 568 00:29:06,880 --> 00:29:06,960 Speaker 2: No? 569 00:29:07,440 --> 00:29:10,280 Speaker 1: Would you know what we do? We just go to Paris? Oh? Yeah, 570 00:29:10,440 --> 00:29:14,320 Speaker 1: have some time together. Yeah. We're really good, really really 571 00:29:14,320 --> 00:29:18,480 Speaker 1: good at dating each other. And I have to say, 572 00:29:18,720 --> 00:29:23,920 Speaker 1: you know, I because I wasn't working for a bunch 573 00:29:23,960 --> 00:29:28,160 Speaker 1: of years when the kids were little. There was like 574 00:29:28,400 --> 00:29:29,920 Speaker 1: I mean, I did a couple of pilots that kind 575 00:29:29,920 --> 00:29:32,480 Speaker 1: of thing, but I wasn't like steadily working. There was 576 00:29:32,520 --> 00:29:34,640 Speaker 1: like a seven eight year period of time where I 577 00:29:34,720 --> 00:29:39,440 Speaker 1: was just home and he, you know, is a surgeon 578 00:29:39,520 --> 00:29:42,240 Speaker 1: and he was at work and like busy busy. So 579 00:29:42,440 --> 00:29:45,440 Speaker 1: except for that period of time, we've been really good 580 00:29:45,480 --> 00:29:50,480 Speaker 1: at taking time together. And because he wasn't that he's 581 00:29:50,520 --> 00:29:52,680 Speaker 1: not a baby person. Sweet, he's never don't want to make 582 00:29:52,720 --> 00:29:54,800 Speaker 1: himself like a bad dad, Like he's great now that 583 00:29:54,880 --> 00:29:58,720 Speaker 1: he goes he goes to babies. He hates children, but 584 00:29:58,840 --> 00:30:00,840 Speaker 1: now that the kids are older, like he's the best 585 00:30:00,920 --> 00:30:03,280 Speaker 1: and he's the best relationship with our kids, and he's 586 00:30:03,360 --> 00:30:08,440 Speaker 1: such a good connected dad of this age and up 587 00:30:08,840 --> 00:30:10,960 Speaker 1: that it's been so amazing. But I will tell you 588 00:30:11,520 --> 00:30:15,200 Speaker 1: he loves me, and I say this very confidently, more 589 00:30:15,240 --> 00:30:17,120 Speaker 1: than anyone in the world. And he would choose me 590 00:30:17,240 --> 00:30:20,600 Speaker 1: over the children. Like if he stops loving me, he's 591 00:30:20,640 --> 00:30:25,680 Speaker 1: not capable of loving because that's because that's him. That's 592 00:30:25,680 --> 00:30:28,120 Speaker 1: got to feel like such a good place to be 593 00:30:28,520 --> 00:30:32,320 Speaker 1: it's great and he has your back. He does you 594 00:30:32,320 --> 00:30:33,840 Speaker 1: give a lot of advice. Who do you go to 595 00:30:34,000 --> 00:30:38,280 Speaker 1: for advice? Him? I go to him. I'll talk to 596 00:30:38,320 --> 00:30:43,719 Speaker 1: my kids sometimes, depending on what the situation is. I 597 00:30:43,840 --> 00:30:49,200 Speaker 1: have some trusted people girlfriends in my life, depending on 598 00:30:49,240 --> 00:30:52,040 Speaker 1: what the situation is that I feel really comfortable. I 599 00:30:52,080 --> 00:30:55,320 Speaker 1: got burned a number of years ago. Look, relationships just 600 00:30:55,360 --> 00:30:58,040 Speaker 1: like anything, you know, it's they go up and down. 601 00:30:58,560 --> 00:31:01,200 Speaker 1: Terry and I don't fight about real things. I have 602 00:31:01,280 --> 00:31:05,120 Speaker 1: to say, well, bicker like most people bicker. But there's 603 00:31:05,120 --> 00:31:09,120 Speaker 1: been very few big, heavy things. But there was one 604 00:31:09,160 --> 00:31:11,200 Speaker 1: once years ago. We were kind of fighting about being 605 00:31:11,200 --> 00:31:13,760 Speaker 1: on a reality show because it took its toll, as 606 00:31:13,800 --> 00:31:15,600 Speaker 1: you know, and we had to have a come to 607 00:31:15,680 --> 00:31:18,080 Speaker 1: Jesus moment where I said to him, look, we either 608 00:31:18,160 --> 00:31:20,600 Speaker 1: figure out how to do this or we get off 609 00:31:20,600 --> 00:31:23,840 Speaker 1: this show because this it's not working. And during that 610 00:31:23,880 --> 00:31:26,240 Speaker 1: period of time, I talked to who I thought was 611 00:31:26,360 --> 00:31:30,440 Speaker 1: a girlfriend of mine about this, and she repeated things 612 00:31:30,480 --> 00:31:33,960 Speaker 1: I said and twisted him and you know, started a 613 00:31:34,040 --> 00:31:36,280 Speaker 1: narrative out there, and I was just like it, really 614 00:31:36,360 --> 00:31:38,760 Speaker 1: that broke me, and it was very hard for me 615 00:31:38,800 --> 00:31:41,200 Speaker 1: to open up to people about things like that. 616 00:31:41,440 --> 00:31:44,920 Speaker 2: So I keep that tight tight. I think that's the 617 00:31:44,920 --> 00:31:45,800 Speaker 2: best way to keep it. 618 00:31:45,880 --> 00:31:46,719 Speaker 1: Yeah. Absolutely. 619 00:31:46,960 --> 00:31:50,440 Speaker 2: My husband is ultimately like my best friend, and I 620 00:31:50,520 --> 00:31:52,920 Speaker 2: go to him and gives me a different perspective than 621 00:31:52,920 --> 00:31:55,880 Speaker 2: I have. He keeps me grounded, he tells, he calls 622 00:31:55,880 --> 00:31:57,920 Speaker 2: me out. Yeah, just yesterday. 623 00:31:58,360 --> 00:32:01,040 Speaker 1: Yeah, And it's hard to hear that stuff mind us too. 624 00:32:01,240 --> 00:32:03,920 Speaker 1: It's so annoying, and it's really annoying when they're right. 625 00:32:04,160 --> 00:32:07,560 Speaker 1: They're always right. Terry's always right. It's so annoying. 626 00:32:07,880 --> 00:32:10,120 Speaker 2: Yeah, that's what they say about marriage though. It's like 627 00:32:10,320 --> 00:32:12,560 Speaker 2: holding that mirror up. They're the mirror. 628 00:32:12,720 --> 00:32:14,360 Speaker 1: But then if you don't want to know, don't ask. 629 00:32:14,400 --> 00:32:16,160 Speaker 1: He'll say that to me too, But that I'll say 630 00:32:16,160 --> 00:32:18,760 Speaker 1: to him, And this is how we teach each other. Right, 631 00:32:19,160 --> 00:32:22,960 Speaker 1: I'll go listen right now. I don't want you to 632 00:32:22,960 --> 00:32:24,400 Speaker 1: fix it. I don't want to hear what you have 633 00:32:24,440 --> 00:32:26,960 Speaker 1: to say. Just let me vent. I need to cry. 634 00:32:27,040 --> 00:32:29,080 Speaker 1: I need to vent, and then you could do that. 635 00:32:29,320 --> 00:32:32,200 Speaker 1: Just give me a minute. Yeah, that's good communication. Yes, 636 00:32:32,320 --> 00:32:34,479 Speaker 1: you got to tell them they're not mind readers. If 637 00:32:34,520 --> 00:32:36,640 Speaker 1: you expect them to be mind readers, you both lose, 638 00:32:37,440 --> 00:32:38,720 Speaker 1: very very true. 639 00:32:39,800 --> 00:32:43,760 Speaker 2: I think that it's important to maintain that independence from 640 00:32:43,800 --> 00:32:45,920 Speaker 2: your husband, even when you are as close. I think 641 00:32:45,960 --> 00:32:47,640 Speaker 2: it sounds like you're as close to your husband. 642 00:32:47,680 --> 00:32:50,520 Speaker 1: I'm very good. Can't be codependent. No, no, I love 643 00:32:50,600 --> 00:32:53,880 Speaker 1: time away from him. Yeah, but I feel like that 644 00:32:54,080 --> 00:32:59,360 Speaker 1: happens with us. It happens sort of naturally, because of 645 00:32:59,400 --> 00:33:03,120 Speaker 1: the hour, because of the jobs. It just kind of happens. 646 00:33:03,160 --> 00:33:05,680 Speaker 1: But I have to say, I mean, I hate to 647 00:33:05,680 --> 00:33:07,040 Speaker 1: say these things out loud, because you know, when you 648 00:33:07,040 --> 00:33:09,120 Speaker 1: talk nicely about your relationship, it always goes to shit. 649 00:33:09,520 --> 00:33:11,160 Speaker 1: You always fight that night. If you say so, I'm 650 00:33:11,160 --> 00:33:13,840 Speaker 1: gonna just pooh poo poop. But yeah, but all I 651 00:33:13,880 --> 00:33:17,200 Speaker 1: have to say is, like, we'll go away together. Like 652 00:33:17,240 --> 00:33:19,880 Speaker 1: we were just in Paris dropping off my daughter at 653 00:33:19,880 --> 00:33:23,200 Speaker 1: school and we spent some time with her. Dropped her 654 00:33:23,240 --> 00:33:26,400 Speaker 1: at school. She's there for the semester, and when we 655 00:33:26,480 --> 00:33:28,480 Speaker 1: dropped her, we ended up we stayed a few extra 656 00:33:28,560 --> 00:33:30,480 Speaker 1: days because we love Paris. It's like our happy place. 657 00:33:30,480 --> 00:33:32,520 Speaker 1: So we stayed there a few days and we came home. 658 00:33:32,880 --> 00:33:35,880 Speaker 1: We fly home, we get home and we go out 659 00:33:35,920 --> 00:33:40,120 Speaker 1: to dinner together. Wow, Like we just you like to 660 00:33:40,160 --> 00:33:42,160 Speaker 1: be just like to be together. I like that. 661 00:33:42,400 --> 00:33:45,560 Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm kind of the same way you just said 662 00:33:45,560 --> 00:33:48,239 Speaker 2: your daughter is doing a semester in Paris. I had 663 00:33:48,400 --> 00:33:50,680 Speaker 2: my daughter do a semester in London, and I was 664 00:33:51,720 --> 00:33:52,720 Speaker 2: very difficult for me. 665 00:33:52,800 --> 00:33:55,920 Speaker 1: Why. I don't know, it's just smelled so far away. Well, 666 00:33:55,960 --> 00:33:58,160 Speaker 1: so my son, so the twins. So he my son 667 00:33:58,200 --> 00:34:00,880 Speaker 1: went to Italy first semester and she's in Paris now. 668 00:34:00,920 --> 00:34:03,160 Speaker 1: And at first I was like, could you coordinate to 669 00:34:03,240 --> 00:34:04,760 Speaker 1: be gone at the same time, right, But then I 670 00:34:04,800 --> 00:34:08,200 Speaker 1: realized I got to go to Europe all year and 671 00:34:08,400 --> 00:34:11,840 Speaker 1: I love it, and you know, again like finding joy 672 00:34:13,000 --> 00:34:15,080 Speaker 1: in things like we were talking about finding time for 673 00:34:15,160 --> 00:34:18,520 Speaker 1: classes or finding time for this. I will go to 674 00:34:18,600 --> 00:34:21,800 Speaker 1: Europe for the This is not relatable. I'm just gonna 675 00:34:21,920 --> 00:34:25,120 Speaker 1: say this before. This is not a relatable thing. When 676 00:34:25,120 --> 00:34:27,719 Speaker 1: I'm about to say, I apologize in advance. Ready, but 677 00:34:27,880 --> 00:34:32,160 Speaker 1: I will go to Paris for the weekend if I 678 00:34:32,200 --> 00:34:36,719 Speaker 1: have time for hits and giggles, if there's a thing 679 00:34:36,880 --> 00:34:40,200 Speaker 1: like my son was done with his tour in Italy 680 00:34:40,280 --> 00:34:43,399 Speaker 1: and it was my youngest son's birthday and I didn't 681 00:34:43,440 --> 00:34:45,279 Speaker 1: really concept think about the fact we were going for 682 00:34:45,280 --> 00:34:47,880 Speaker 1: a weekend, but I took them skiing in the French 683 00:34:47,920 --> 00:34:50,879 Speaker 1: Alps for four days and it was like a long 684 00:34:50,920 --> 00:34:53,840 Speaker 1: weekend and it was a long way to go, but 685 00:34:54,120 --> 00:34:56,720 Speaker 1: it was so great and the two of them bonding 686 00:34:56,760 --> 00:34:58,360 Speaker 1: and I went skiing for the first time and it 687 00:34:58,440 --> 00:35:00,680 Speaker 1: was fantastic. And so now my daughter there and she's like, 688 00:35:00,760 --> 00:35:04,000 Speaker 1: I'm lonely, I miss you, I'm homesick. I go I 689 00:35:04,080 --> 00:35:05,919 Speaker 1: may have a weekend. That's the thing. 690 00:35:06,280 --> 00:35:10,120 Speaker 2: Because you and I are both homemakers. Yes, we want 691 00:35:10,280 --> 00:35:12,600 Speaker 2: our homes to be the sanctuary for our family. It 692 00:35:12,680 --> 00:35:15,400 Speaker 2: sounds like we're very similar in respect. How what is 693 00:35:15,440 --> 00:35:17,719 Speaker 2: it like when your kids they don't want to leave? 694 00:35:17,880 --> 00:35:20,239 Speaker 2: It's so good where they were at home. 695 00:35:20,400 --> 00:35:22,279 Speaker 1: Yeah, I hear kids want to stay here the like 696 00:35:22,480 --> 00:35:25,440 Speaker 1: thirty Now. Honestly, I'm okay with it. I don't know. 697 00:35:26,120 --> 00:35:30,280 Speaker 1: I want them to be close, but not that close. Yeah. 698 00:35:30,280 --> 00:35:33,279 Speaker 2: Well my daughter, yeah, well two of my girls are 699 00:35:33,320 --> 00:35:35,799 Speaker 2: still at home, and our house is small and the 700 00:35:35,840 --> 00:35:37,560 Speaker 2: bedrooms are all right together. 701 00:35:37,719 --> 00:35:40,920 Speaker 1: Yeah. There is no privacy, privacy, yeah at all. And 702 00:35:40,960 --> 00:35:42,279 Speaker 1: they're cool with that. There. 703 00:35:42,560 --> 00:35:44,759 Speaker 2: I did that on purpose because they were teenagers. When 704 00:35:44,800 --> 00:35:46,879 Speaker 2: about the house UNDERSTI wanted to keep them close. 705 00:35:47,000 --> 00:35:48,520 Speaker 1: You wanted to hear what was calling. I'm kind of 706 00:35:48,560 --> 00:35:51,040 Speaker 1: like I knew more. Yeah right, but I want you. 707 00:35:51,160 --> 00:35:53,040 Speaker 1: I like that you like change. It might be time 708 00:35:53,080 --> 00:35:56,799 Speaker 1: to move. I have thought about it, definitely thought about it. 709 00:35:57,280 --> 00:36:00,319 Speaker 1: Oh I love our conversation. Yeah too good. 710 00:36:00,360 --> 00:36:04,280 Speaker 2: I have to ask you one last question, Heather Deubro, 711 00:36:04,719 --> 00:36:06,800 Speaker 2: what was your last I choose me moment? 712 00:36:09,440 --> 00:36:14,000 Speaker 1: I mean, Swiss alps ain't bad. Yeah, but that's not it. 713 00:36:14,160 --> 00:36:20,680 Speaker 1: I really think it's going back to vocal lessons, and 714 00:36:20,680 --> 00:36:23,440 Speaker 1: I would say just in the category I signed up for, 715 00:36:23,719 --> 00:36:26,919 Speaker 1: like a bunch of things, a bunch of classes where 716 00:36:26,960 --> 00:36:29,799 Speaker 1: I'm really choosing me. It's a really hard thing. I 717 00:36:29,800 --> 00:36:31,960 Speaker 1: wonder if you feel the same way, where you know 718 00:36:32,080 --> 00:36:36,160 Speaker 1: you want to put things out into the world to 719 00:36:36,239 --> 00:36:38,279 Speaker 1: make them real and put you know, manifest them. But 720 00:36:38,320 --> 00:36:41,760 Speaker 1: there's also a school of thought where don't tell people 721 00:36:41,760 --> 00:36:44,200 Speaker 1: what you're doing, show them when it happens. And I 722 00:36:44,200 --> 00:36:45,640 Speaker 1: feel like when I was younger, it was like, oh, 723 00:36:45,680 --> 00:36:47,279 Speaker 1: I don't want to tell anyone because it'll jinx it 724 00:36:47,360 --> 00:36:49,839 Speaker 1: or it'll this, or it all that kind of over that, 725 00:36:50,040 --> 00:36:52,759 Speaker 1: like I don't really care. Like I loved when I 726 00:36:52,800 --> 00:36:54,400 Speaker 1: told you that I'm doing this class you. You were 727 00:36:54,400 --> 00:36:57,359 Speaker 1: a little horrified and kind of excited at the same time. Right, 728 00:36:57,680 --> 00:37:00,360 Speaker 1: That's how I was. And I feel like i'm me 729 00:37:01,440 --> 00:37:05,720 Speaker 1: by pushing myself out of my comfort zone and into 730 00:37:05,719 --> 00:37:08,759 Speaker 1: these areas because again, we have nothing to lose. And 731 00:37:08,800 --> 00:37:10,800 Speaker 1: by the way, and you don't give a fuck, I 732 00:37:10,840 --> 00:37:12,680 Speaker 1: don't give a fuck. And if I could just toot 733 00:37:12,800 --> 00:37:17,399 Speaker 1: our horns any collectively, like we look really good and 734 00:37:17,840 --> 00:37:22,560 Speaker 1: we're talented, and we're thriving, and our audience watches TV, 735 00:37:22,760 --> 00:37:26,040 Speaker 1: so why not. Yeah, I mean you said it, it's 736 00:37:26,080 --> 00:37:29,279 Speaker 1: time to go back. I love that, right, So this 737 00:37:29,360 --> 00:37:31,440 Speaker 1: is a first step. And what's also really great is 738 00:37:31,640 --> 00:37:33,680 Speaker 1: remember when you're younger and you're like, oh shit, if 739 00:37:33,719 --> 00:37:36,080 Speaker 1: something doesn't happen in the next six months, I'm done. 740 00:37:36,239 --> 00:37:38,600 Speaker 1: Nothing will ever happen again. Where will I be? I'll 741 00:37:38,640 --> 00:37:40,839 Speaker 1: shrivel up and die. Now you're like, I'm already all 742 00:37:40,880 --> 00:37:42,880 Speaker 1: it doesn't matter. Three months, six months, next year, or 743 00:37:42,880 --> 00:37:46,239 Speaker 1: whatever it happens, it happens. It's fine, exactly. Yeah, Oh 744 00:37:46,320 --> 00:37:48,399 Speaker 1: you're set. You're just in a great place in your life. 745 00:37:48,440 --> 00:37:50,640 Speaker 1: I can feel it. Yeah, so are you. It's so good. 746 00:37:50,800 --> 00:37:53,359 Speaker 1: I love it. Thank you so much, Thank you for 747 00:37:53,400 --> 00:37:56,960 Speaker 1: having me. I loved meeting you. I mean, well, now 748 00:37:57,080 --> 00:37:59,040 Speaker 1: you really know, and yeah, I know you so well. 749 00:37:59,120 --> 00:37:59,600 Speaker 1: I love it.