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Speaker 1: It's the radio segment that's helping you eat dinner more

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Speaker 1: efficiently with a new food service called Second Bite Catering,

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Speaker 1: offering pre chewed meals so you don't.

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Speaker 2: Have to waste precious time and energy.

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Speaker 1: Now fifty one year old Marty will chew up your

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Speaker 1: steak for you, then pack it and ship so you

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Speaker 1: can open the box and go.

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Speaker 2: Straight to swallowing.

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Speaker 1: With Laser stories, the segment, we read weird news stories

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Speaker 1: around the globe, just like everyone else does, except we've

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Speaker 1: got a laser and those are their serial masticators. Just

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Speaker 1: don't This first laser story is out of Florida. Recently

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Speaker 1: at Port Orange Country Club. Someone called nine one one

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Speaker 1: and said at least twenty people were involved in a

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Speaker 1: physical fight on a pickleball court.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, you know, they threw down at country clubs like that.

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Speaker 2: At least some of them were seniors.

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Speaker 1: One of those people was sixty three year old Anthony Sapm.

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Speaker 1: He apparently started to fight over a rules violation where

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Speaker 1: he accused another player of stepping in the kitchen, the

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Speaker 1: area right by the.

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Speaker 2: Net and nobody.

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Speaker 3: You can't step in the kitchen.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, Well, according to police, they had words and then

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Speaker 1: After the match, Anthony called the other player's wife the

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Speaker 1: word you never want to hear.

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Speaker 2: It's the country club, so he called her poor. Her

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Speaker 2: husband defended her.

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Speaker 1: Then Anthony punched him in the face and hit him

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Speaker 1: with a pickleball paddle.

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Speaker 2: Oh my god, yeah.

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Speaker 3: When the weapons already in hand.

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Speaker 1: Paramedics took the guy to a hospital for a cutover

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Speaker 1: his eye that caused significant bleeding. Meanwhile, Anthony wasn't done.

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Speaker 1: He also punched another guy in the nose and pushed

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Speaker 1: a seven year old woman to the ground.

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Speaker 3: I've fallen and I can't get up.

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Speaker 1: Meanwhile, his wife, Julianne, fifty one years old by the way,

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Speaker 1: cparently got in on the action too, so she's facing

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Speaker 1: a felony charge for battery on a person sixty five

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Speaker 1: year older.

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Speaker 2: Oh my god.

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Speaker 3: You know what they say about couples who fight together.

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Speaker 3: What do they say say together?

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Speaker 2: Oh?

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Speaker 3: It they go to jail together.

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Speaker 1: I imagine this is like a really slowed down action movie,

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Speaker 1: like a martial arts fight scene, but really slow.

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Speaker 3: I like it.

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Speaker 2: Both of them are doing court next week.

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Speaker 1: As for the other couple dozen of people involved, it

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Speaker 1: sounds like Anthony and his wife were fighting all of

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Speaker 1: them too.

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Speaker 2: Wow, it's kind of impressive. I know, Anthony.

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Speaker 1: Respect This next Lazer story is out of Oh okay,

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Speaker 1: nice another Florida stories here, But instead of twenty people,

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Speaker 1: this situation happened with just one person at a local target. Oh. Apparently,

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Speaker 1: witnesses spotted a twenty five year old woman named Sloane

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Speaker 1: Whittaker driving around a motorized shopping cart acting very strange.

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Speaker 1: She was filling up her basket with various food items,

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Speaker 1: eating it, and even brought her own wine glass to

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Speaker 1: drink merlo as she maneuvered through the store.

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Speaker 2: That's that's awesome.

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Speaker 3: It sounds like a girl's night. I could get behind. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Well, when deputies got there, they found a half empty

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Speaker 1: bottle of wine in her cart.

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Speaker 3: Huh.

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Speaker 1: They also watched her grab a box of sushi from

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Speaker 1: the shelf, eat a piece and put the box back.

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Speaker 2: You can sushi like grape.

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Speaker 3: I feel like we should move this party to Costco

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Speaker 3: where the samples are free.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. She did the same with cinnamon rolls and mini muffins.

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Speaker 3: She need a dessert.

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Speaker 2: One officer saw.

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Speaker 1: Her eat the majority of a rotisserie chicken without any utensils,

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Speaker 1: just tearing into it with her mouth as she made

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Speaker 1: dinosaur noises.

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Speaker 2: Every time I go to like a costco, We've all

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Speaker 2: thought of doing it. Yeah, she she actually went forward.

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Speaker 3: Isn't that the same as taking one grape and taking it?

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Speaker 1: Yeah? When the officers found that Sloan consumed thirty two

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Speaker 1: dollars and thirty six cents worth of food, hey.

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Speaker 3: Do they only count half the chicken or the whole chicken?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, they're taken into account.

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Speaker 1: She's only taking small bites, along with two bottles of

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Speaker 1: Walmart's house wine.

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Speaker 2: The good stuff. When asked why she.

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Speaker 1: Did what she did, Sloan said she was hungry and

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Speaker 1: didn't want to bring it outside of the store.

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Speaker 2: It's nice, it's dirty out there.

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Speaker 1: She also admits she knew that what she was doing

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Speaker 1: was wrong, but the myth she took didn't help either.

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Speaker 1: How many times have you almost made a bad decision

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Speaker 1: like wait, wait, wait, let me just do some myth

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Speaker 1: and then I'll be okay?

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Speaker 2: Guide right?

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Speaker 1: Yes?

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Speaker 2: Who could have thought that would backfire?

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Speaker 1: She was arrested on shoplifting and drug paraphernelia charges.

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Speaker 2: Very nice. This next laser story is out of Food News.

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Speaker 1: IKEA has quietly dropped a food item that feels less

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Speaker 1: like a snack and more like a statement.

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Speaker 2: It's dubbed the half meter hot dog.

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Speaker 1: Whoa, whoa I The twenty inch franc is now being

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Speaker 1: served at Ikea locations all across Europe. Brook described this

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Speaker 1: monster that I just put in front of you.

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Speaker 3: Well, it's it looks like it's a very very very

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Speaker 3: very long hot dog. What appears to be a foot

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Speaker 3: long bun and it's sticking out at least six inches

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Speaker 3: on each side.

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Speaker 2: I'm impressed you didn't use your husband anywhere in that description.

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Speaker 2: Good job for about five.

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Speaker 3: It would be weird.

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Speaker 2: She's like, it's like five.

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Speaker 1: Michaels for about five dollars US. It's oversized and already

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Speaker 1: sparking a lot of chatter online for obvious reasons.

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Speaker 3: Couldn't they? But why couldn't they make the bun to

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Speaker 3: match the same size as the hot dog? Isn't that

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Speaker 3: hard to figure out? It's like another Ikea item that

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Speaker 3: doesn't go together properly?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, you put it together. The extra length is for dipping.

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Speaker 3: Brook Oh actually has a point, you smother you don't dip.

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Speaker 2: Well, this is Europe, so they do it classy over there.

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Speaker 2: For one.

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Speaker 1: It has been dubbed a potential challenger to the legendary

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Speaker 1: Costco dollar fifty hot dog combo. Thank you well, the

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Speaker 1: economics aren't exactly apples and apples. The energy is kind

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Speaker 1: of similar. Big portion, low price, maximum cultural impact. For now,

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Speaker 1: the half meter dog appears to be exclusive to Europe.

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Speaker 1: But if history has taught us anything, it's that when

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Speaker 1: a food item captures the internet's attention, borders tend to

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Speaker 1: blur fast.

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Speaker 3: Well, you bring it over here, and nobody's gonna know

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Speaker 3: what a meter is.

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Speaker 2: Let's go to your final laser story.

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Speaker 1: Out of money, money mania. According to a new report,

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Speaker 1: the average American spends nearly forty eight percent of their

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Speaker 1: paycheck within the first forty eight hours. Thirty five percent

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Speaker 1: of the paycheck is gone within the first twelve hours,

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Speaker 1: and that's especially true among Gen z ers, who spend

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Speaker 1: money faster than any other generation.

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Speaker 2: That sounds like that dress. Yeah yeah. Most of that

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Speaker 2: spending does go toward essentials.

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Speaker 1: Fifty two percent of people say they cover groceries or

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Speaker 1: necessities as soon as they receive their paycheck.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Others pay bills that are due within the week, or

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Speaker 1: take care of major obligations like their rent or their

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Speaker 1: credit card bills.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, that's what I do. I'm like credit card bill done,

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Speaker 2: all right.

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Speaker 3: It's always so depressing we're talking about this stuff.

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Speaker 1: It's a little shocking how much is able to disappear

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Speaker 1: so quickly. Experts say sixty two percent of people would

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Speaker 1: be in favor of being paid daily as an alternative,

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Speaker 1: I mean even just weekly.

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Speaker 2: It is nice. Some people get paid weekly already.

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Speaker 1: If you did that, they say, it would improve their

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Speaker 1: financial wellness and decrease stress. But will it happen anytime soon?

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Speaker 1: Financial institutions say no, I think it big.

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Speaker 3: Gets so much harder for budgeting, like to figure out

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Speaker 3: how to save enough to make sure that you can

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Speaker 3: pay the rent by the.

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Speaker 2: Server for a decade.

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Speaker 1: And it's like every day you make a one hundred

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Speaker 1: or two hundred and and you go, okay, how.

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Speaker 2: Do I spill this up? Twenty for gas, twenty.

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Speaker 1: For drugs, I mean, not for drugs.

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Speaker 3: I heard the rest.

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Speaker 1: So yeah, we're probably not going to be going to

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Speaker 1: daily paychecks in the near future unless some sort of

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Speaker 1: uprising happens.

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Speaker 2: No, no, no, not humper, not that type of uprising.

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Speaker 2: I mean the financial uprising.

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Speaker 1: But that sound does mean that Lady Destroys has come

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Speaker 1: to an end for the day.

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Speaker 2: We're gonna do it the same time on Wednesday,