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Speaker 1: It's Thanksgiving.

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Speaker 2: Everybody, Happy Thanksgiving to you and to yours. I will

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Speaker 2: be in Vegas this weekend at the third night of

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Speaker 2: my residency at the Cosmo with my whole entire family

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Speaker 2: and all of my cousins nice and then I'm going

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Speaker 2: to do the tree lighting the next night at the Cosmo.

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Speaker 1: Oh that's the kind of team player I am.

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Speaker 3: Are you a family that like goes around and makes

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Speaker 3: everyone say what they're thankful for?

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Speaker 1: No?

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Speaker 2: Oh, no, see I am. I do that in other families,

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Speaker 2: but my family sucks. No one does stuff like that

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Speaker 2: in our family.

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Speaker 3: No.

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Speaker 2: No, they all think I'm you know, if I say

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Speaker 2: something like that, it's like, oh, Chelsea, so just spiritual.

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Speaker 1: She's in a cult, you know. It's like corny.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, everyone's It's more like who do you who's the

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Speaker 2: most annoying person at the stable?

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Speaker 1: To you would be a better question for my family members.

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Speaker 1: I see. Yeah.

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Speaker 2: So now I will be in Vegas for almost I

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Speaker 2: think for seventy two hours. This will be my longest

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Speaker 2: stretch in Vegas because my family is all coming and

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Speaker 2: they wanted, you know, the free rooms and I'm sure

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Speaker 2: whatever else I pay for. You know, So who knows,

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Speaker 2: I'll probably just break even performing and then leaving.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, I feel like twenty four to forty eight hours

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Speaker 4: is like kind of the max that you should be

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Speaker 4: in Vegas.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, And just to be clarified, I don't I am

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Speaker 2: not paying for those free rooms the casino is, but

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Speaker 2: I'm just saying, like that's why they're coming because it's free.

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Speaker 3: I mean, hey, yeah, so.

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Speaker 1: This will be my longest stretch in Vegas.

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Speaker 2: So if I'm alive next week, that'll be a miracle,

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Speaker 2: especially with all of my family members.

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Speaker 3: You're not a big gambler, right, you just like want

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Speaker 3: like gambell No.

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Speaker 1: I have exactly.

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Speaker 2: I have a little stipend that I use, and I

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Speaker 2: every time I come home exactly with what I left with,

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Speaker 2: and I just keep repurposing it.

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Speaker 1: Oh that's pretty good.

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Speaker 5: I love to gamble.

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Speaker 2: I like to gamble, and my sister likes to gamble too.

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Speaker 2: But my sister who likes to gamble isn't coming.

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Speaker 3: Oh dang.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it's all my cousins and all of like there's

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Speaker 2: like forty of them and my cousins.

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Speaker 3: I'm gonna guess that's Shoshana that likes to gamble.

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Speaker 2: Shoshana exactly. Shoshana loves to gamble.

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Speaker 3: I like that.

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Speaker 2: The last weekend we were on tour together, she came

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Speaker 2: to the show in Philly and Bethlehem, and Bethlehem was

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Speaker 2: a casino, so she went and gambled and came back

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Speaker 2: and I was on stage.

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Speaker 1: I take photos with.

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Speaker 2: People after like people come up to the stage and

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Speaker 2: I take some selfies. And she came out while I

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Speaker 2: was taking photos and said, Okay, let's go. It's she

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Speaker 2: was done, she was wrapped. And then the next night

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Speaker 2: she came out. I called for my opener to come

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Speaker 2: out to take a picture with me on stage, and

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Speaker 2: she was six, so she had already gone home. My

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Speaker 2: sister came out when I called. I was like, Megan,

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Speaker 2: keep it going for Megan Gailey. And my sister came

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Speaker 2: running out and I'm like, what are you doing here?

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Speaker 2: And she said, she goes tell them I'm the Virgin

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Speaker 2: because I talk about her in my set. She goes

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Speaker 2: tell them I'm the Virgin, and then she waved to

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Speaker 2: the crowd. It was so ridiculous.

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Speaker 1: She a little bit of a ham like.

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Speaker 2: She like she's got some She's definitely got a very

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Speaker 2: distinctive personality. She's kind of like she's a lot like

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Speaker 2: my father. Like my father was a used car dealer.

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Speaker 2: She won't like this because she doesn't see it, but

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Speaker 2: she's very she's got side hustles going, you know, she's

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Speaker 2: always got like things going on in the side. But

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Speaker 2: she's got her ear piercing business. But she's also probably

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Speaker 2: like trading furniture online that she rides like or at

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Speaker 2: a sale and then like resells it on Craigslist. You know,

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Speaker 2: she's a scammer a little bit like that. She's like

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Speaker 2: my dad in that way and innovated. Yeah, she's yeah,

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Speaker 2: and she's always like she came on the vacation with us,

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Speaker 2: Molly and I, my cousin and I who she's been

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Speaker 2: traveling with me. Molly and I have carry on bags,

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Speaker 2: and my sister brought a suitcase for three days, a

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Speaker 2: huge suitcase with six pairs of shoes.

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Speaker 1: We're like, where are you? Where are you? I don't

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Speaker 1: even have that much and I'm the one performing what

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Speaker 1: are you? Where are you going?

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Speaker 2: She's like, I have to be ready for anything. I

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Speaker 2: don't know what we're going to get up to. I'm like, well,

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Speaker 2: we didn't get up to anything besides sitting around in

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Speaker 2: our hotel rooms all day.

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Speaker 3: That's kind of nice.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, exactly.

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Speaker 2: Our family's not motivated, we're not activity. Like you know,

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Speaker 2: I'm the one who's like that in my family.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, so you just push everybody to do.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, they think I'm on crack. I'm like, no, you

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Speaker 2: guys are fucking lazy. But when I'm with them, I

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Speaker 2: become also lazy.

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Speaker 4: I can kind of feel like if she's traveling with you,

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Speaker 4: she's like feels like she's got to be ready for anything.

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Speaker 2: She brought six pairs of sneakers. They were all the same,

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Speaker 2: Like what she was just clearly trying to show up

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Speaker 2: the shoes.

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Speaker 1: No heels.

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Speaker 2: She can't fit her feet into heels. Her feet are

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Speaker 2: like bricks, rectangular bricks. Remember Kathy the cartoon character that's

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Speaker 2: my sister's feet or like that.

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Speaker 3: Okay, great, well, Happy Thanksgiving every.

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Speaker 2: Happy Thanksgiving everyone. Our special guest today is Kelly Rizzo.

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Speaker 2: Please welcome Kelly.

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Speaker 1: Hi, Kelly Rizzo. I'm so happy to be here. I'm

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Speaker 1: always so happy to see you.

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Speaker 2: You're such a sweet person and you're always just you

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Speaker 2: have a nice aura around you.

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Speaker 1: I don't really see Auras.

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Speaker 2: But you have such kind eyes and you're always so

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Speaker 2: kind and Bob was. I met you obviously through Bob,

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Speaker 2: but Bob was also that way, like he was so

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Speaker 2: kind hearted, which is why he was so beloved. For

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Speaker 2: those of you listening, Kelly Rizseau was married to Bob

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Speaker 2: Saggat for how many years were you guys doing?

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Speaker 6: Only we were together six years but only married three

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Speaker 6: and a half years.

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Speaker 1: Three and a half years.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, well that's probably for the best. I mean, you know,

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Speaker 2: marriages don't really need to go beyond No, it ran

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Speaker 2: its course.

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Speaker 6: We did the thing that's all need to be. That's

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Speaker 6: really all it needed to be. It was cut short. However,

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Speaker 6: it was one of those things where I remember at

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Speaker 6: Bob's funeral or at the after party, Jeff Ross said,

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Speaker 6: and I don't blame him for saying this, but he goes,

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Speaker 6: you know, Kelly, you got robbed, And I'm like, even then,

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Speaker 6: even the week that we lost him, I was like, no,

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Speaker 6: I didn't I remember.

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Speaker 1: I don't know where I heard you talking about it,

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Speaker 1: but I remember you.

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Speaker 6: I had a hard time thinking I got robbed because

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Speaker 6: I felt so grateful for the time I got to

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Speaker 6: have with him.

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Speaker 2: So yeah, and since then, the things that you have

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Speaker 2: done with your grief, which is a real tenet of

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Speaker 2: this podcast is talking to people about how to deal

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Speaker 2: with grief, how to mobilize out of fear or grief.

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Speaker 1: For starters, you.

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Speaker 2: Have a podcast, right yeah, comfort Food, Comfort Food, which

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Speaker 2: is where you basically talk to someone about grieving over

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Speaker 2: a nice meal, right yeah, about their grief.

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Speaker 5: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: I mean it's a way to.

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Speaker 6: Make it a little bit more palatable and a little

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Speaker 6: bit more inviting because it's not a fun topic and

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Speaker 6: people hate talking about It's still really taboo, which is

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Speaker 6: so strang because we all go through it at some point.

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Speaker 6: So I was like, how can I make this a

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Speaker 6: little easier and a little bit more you know, fun

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Speaker 6: for lack of a better word.

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Speaker 2: Who were the people that helped you when you lost Bob, Like,

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Speaker 2: who were the people that helped put you in perspective?

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Speaker 2: Or was that just something that was innate in within

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Speaker 2: you that you were able to have kind of like a.

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Speaker 6: I mean it's one of those things where you know

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Speaker 6: when you go through something and somebody's like, oh, you're

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Speaker 6: so strong. I mean I didn't feel strong. I didn't

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Speaker 6: know what I was doing I'd never been through this before.

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Speaker 6: It was very new to me, never really lost anyone.

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Speaker 6: And I was very fortunate because Bob had had so

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Speaker 6: much death in his life and so much loss that

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Speaker 6: it was almost like I was leaning on him even

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Speaker 6: though he wasn't here, based on what he had taught

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Speaker 6: me about death and how to get through it, which

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Speaker 6: was laughing and you know, having really good people around

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Speaker 6: you and just understanding that this is life and this

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Speaker 6: is what happens, but to kind of always look at

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Speaker 6: the silver linings. And fortunately, because Bob was such a wonderful,

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Speaker 6: special human, he was surrounded by really wonderful people. So

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Speaker 6: I got through with his friends, his daughters, My sister

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Speaker 6: was the most instrumental person by far. I mean she's

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Speaker 6: slept in bed with me every single night for like

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Speaker 6: two months straight. But yeah, his friends, I mean, Jeff Ross,

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Speaker 6: John Mayer, all the full house people, they really were

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Speaker 6: his family. And so that kind of got imparted on

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Speaker 6: to me because they were so wonderful and they loved

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Speaker 6: him so much that they're like, we're going to be

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Speaker 6: there for her too.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, and then you started a grief kind of like

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Speaker 2: support group right online.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, so this is so brand new, so thanks for

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Speaker 6: letting me talk about it. It's called Comfort Club and

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Speaker 6: it's a membership and just an online kind of support

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Speaker 6: system where it's its own little social media network so

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Speaker 6: people feel. What I've learned in this past almost three

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Speaker 6: years now, which is crazy, is that so many people

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Speaker 6: are reaching out to me all the time, and a

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Speaker 6: lot of people feel very very alone in this and

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Speaker 6: they don't really know where to go. They don't know,

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Speaker 6: you know, and grief support groups are not really fun places.

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Speaker 6: I'm sure it's a lot of people who are in

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Speaker 6: the thick of it, really going through it. And I

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Speaker 6: get all these messages all the time and all these

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Speaker 6: dms like I just lost my husband, What do I

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Speaker 6: do help? And it's can't DM somebody back and have

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Speaker 6: it be really effective? So I'm like, how can I

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Speaker 6: create something that is a little bit more immersive and

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Speaker 6: a little bit more interactive and can really help people,

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Speaker 6: and that where they can meet each other and then

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Speaker 6: help each other. So I'm having great guests on, you know,

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Speaker 6: whether they're therapists or people who I would have had

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Speaker 6: on my podcast, and they come on and talk live

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Speaker 6: to the group and they can ask questions because on

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Speaker 6: a podcast you can't really I mean yours is different

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Speaker 6: because you can't take questions. But a lot of times,

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Speaker 6: you know, it's not really interactive, right, so these people

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Speaker 6: can actually talk to the guests, talk to the expert,

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Speaker 6: talk to the therapist, whoever it is. Because you know,

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Speaker 6: I make a big disclaimer, I'm not a therapist. I'm

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Speaker 6: just here to help facilitate this community.

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Speaker 2: So I do really on my podcast, I pretend I

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Speaker 2: am a therapist, and that I have a medical degree,

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Speaker 2: that I'm a PhD, that I am a certified Board

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Speaker 2: of pharmacologist, I'm a gynecologist, I'm a pharmacologist, on whatever

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Speaker 2: you need me to be. I'm actually none of those things,

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Speaker 2: but I do pretend that I am because I feel

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Speaker 2: like all of the things that you learn when you

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Speaker 2: go through something difficult and you lose somebody and you

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Speaker 2: go through the proper channels of therapy and grieving are

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Speaker 2: such valuable lessons. You know, it's so important to impart

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Speaker 2: that to other people who are struggling, and you know,

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Speaker 2: grief isn't necessarily only doesn't only have to do with

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Speaker 2: us losing someone. That's the most obvious way to be

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Speaker 2: grieving but you know, people are grieving this election. People

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Speaker 2: are grieving, you know, losses of relationships. When people don't die,

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Speaker 2: you know, there's grief everywhere.

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Speaker 6: Divorce, relationship, I mean friendships. People grieve friendships. So I

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Speaker 6: also am very specific about that, like, this is not

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Speaker 6: just if you're lost a spouse or lost anybody. This

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Speaker 6: is for any type of or some people just I

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Speaker 6: have some people that haven't really had a specific loss,

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Speaker 6: but they're just they're like, I just want a good

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Speaker 6: community that's comforting. I'm just having a tough time, and

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Speaker 6: I just want to meet some great people.

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Speaker 4: Well, when you talk so much about grief and loss

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Speaker 4: on your Instagram and on your podcast, so it seems

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Speaker 4: like a natural progression from the sorts of conversations you're

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Speaker 4: already having, then Yeah, And it's.

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Speaker 6: So strange because you know, you just said that going

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Speaker 6: through things does kind of give you this expertise in

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Speaker 6: a sense. But I still always feel like I'm not

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Speaker 6: an expert. I don't know what the hell I'm doing.

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Speaker 2: But I think people are always just looking for some support,

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Speaker 2: you know, like a ballast. And and because you've gone

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Speaker 2: through something, you do have something to say about it,

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Speaker 2: and you do have your personal experience to draw from,

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Speaker 2: and that is valuable, especially when somebody needs a reference

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Speaker 2: point or a perspective, and it's it's always helpful to

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Speaker 2: be able to talk to somebody who's been through something

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Speaker 2: that you're going through. So it doesn't matter if your expertise,

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Speaker 2: like it's you become an expert in humanity, you know,

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Speaker 2: and wanting to actually make other people feel better and

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Speaker 2: less alone. I think that's what it really comes down

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Speaker 2: to when even when you're going through the depths of

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Speaker 2: your despair and loss, it's like you're not the only

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Speaker 2: one you know someone else lost someone. There's millions of

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Speaker 2: people who are losing people every day, and for some reason,

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Speaker 2: there's comfort in that. There's comfort in knowing that there's

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Speaker 2: a sheer volume of people who may be going through

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Speaker 2: a similar experience.

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Speaker 6: And I think because it's also very unusual to have

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Speaker 6: to go through it publicly usually. I mean, that's not

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Speaker 6: a thing that typically people have to you know, if

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Speaker 6: you typically lose your spouse or something, it's you do

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Speaker 6: it privately. And because everyone loved Bob so much, I

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Speaker 6: felt that there was this you know, I almost didn't

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Speaker 6: need to help keep his legacy alive because he does

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Speaker 6: that on his own, but because he was such a

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Speaker 6: special one in a billion person, I'm like, I owe

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Speaker 6: it to him and to myself to do everything I

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Speaker 6: can to share about him. And while doing that, I

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Speaker 6: started talking a little bit more about the grief stuff too,

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Speaker 6: and then people naturally were like, hey, help me or

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Speaker 6: I want more of this, and I was like, oh gosh,

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Speaker 6: Like normally I talk about food and travel and music.

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Speaker 6: I'm like, so all of a sudden, here I am

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Speaker 6: talking about grief. But it when I saw that one

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Speaker 6: that that was actually helping people, I'm like, okay, this

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Speaker 6: needs to be more of the direction I go in.

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Speaker 1: So yeah, okay, So how can people join this group?

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Speaker 6: It's just comfort Club online dot com and it's it's

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Speaker 6: just yeah membership that there's different live events every month.

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Speaker 6: I do a Comfort Food Sundays every month where I

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Speaker 6: do live cooking so for you know, people get the

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Speaker 6: Sunday scaries, they don't want to be alone on a Sunday,

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Speaker 6: and so here, I, you know, will cook a recipe

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Speaker 6: that we can all cook together and then eat dinner

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Speaker 6: together virtually sweet and then yeah, it's it's only been

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Speaker 6: a little over a month, but it's been really wonderful

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Speaker 6: so far.

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Speaker 1: So I love that, And so I want.

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Speaker 2: To just honor Bob for a little bit because since

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Speaker 2: you were, tell me, what are you with some of

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Speaker 2: the things that made him so unique and special to

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Speaker 2: you and to the world.

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Speaker 6: Well, it's so interesting to say this to a comedian

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Speaker 6: because a lot of people don't understand this about comedians,

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Speaker 6: but comedians are incredibly deep and incredibly complex and have

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Speaker 6: usually gone through a really tough time, which is how

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Speaker 6: they became comedians. Incredibly deep, incredibly deep, incredibly complex, And

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Speaker 6: Bob was just this mix of He was hilarious but

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Speaker 6: also insanely neurotic, and also so giving and nurturing and

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Speaker 6: helpful and thoughtful, but also so needy, you know. I mean,

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Speaker 6: he was just everything. And it was truly you know,

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Speaker 6: I certainly did not go into this before I met him,

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Speaker 6: thinking like, oh, I'm gonna end up dating Bob Saggot

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Speaker 6: one day. Like that was just so strange. It was

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Speaker 6: when I first met him, it was such a foreign

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Speaker 6: concept to me. I was like, I can't like Bob Saget.

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Speaker 6: That's so weird, Like that's that Danny Tanner.

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Speaker 1: Guy, Like that's so weird. It was so bizarre to me.

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Speaker 6: But then I slowly started to realize, I'm like this,

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Speaker 6: I will never ever meet another person like this in

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Speaker 6: my entire life. He was just the most unique, special, hilarious, introspective,

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Speaker 6: deep person who just truly cared so much about the

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Speaker 6: people in his life and also just cared about That

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Speaker 6: was his last big hurrah where you know, his last

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Speaker 6: tour was called I Don't Do Negative.

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Speaker 1: All he wanted to do.

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Speaker 6: It was, you know, tough time in the world, and

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Speaker 6: he just wanted to make people happy. That's all he

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Speaker 6: ever wanted was just to make people happy.

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Speaker 2: So I think the thing that stands out most to

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Speaker 2: me about Bob is his enthusiasm. He was so enthusiastic.

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Speaker 2: You know, anytime I saw him, he was like, oh

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Speaker 2: my god, Chelsea, tell me everything, what's going on?

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Speaker 1: Like so excited to see you.

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Speaker 2: And it wasn't just me that he was like that

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Speaker 2: with obviously, that's what he exuded to everyone. It was

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Speaker 2: so genuine, genuine, right, It wasn't both full of shit

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Speaker 2: and it wasn't He wasn't jaded and he was never

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Speaker 2: a negative guy like there was. I don't know if

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Speaker 2: he had a dark side to him. I mean, I

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Speaker 2: guess we all do, but as far as male comedians go,

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Speaker 2: he was, you know, one of the least dark comedians

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Speaker 2: that I've ever met.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, it was more personally just because he always felt

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Speaker 6: the way to the world and he had so much

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Speaker 6: loss in his own life.

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Speaker 1: He did have. And when I say a dark side.

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Speaker 6: I don't mean you know where he was like secretly,

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Speaker 6: you know, off yelling at people or something like that.

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Speaker 6: I mean, he it was more he would just feel sad,

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Speaker 6: you know, and he just wanted to make people happy,

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Speaker 6: and so he was always struggling with like, oh God,

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Speaker 6: like the world can be a tough place, and but

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Speaker 6: all I want to do is help people, and y

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Speaker 6: you know, at the same time trying to be a

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Speaker 6: good dad and balance with his work. And you know,

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Speaker 6: even though he you know, was an actor and a

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Speaker 6: producer and director and all this stuff, like being a

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Speaker 6: comedian was what made him the happiest.

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Speaker 2: So yeah, and you're still very close with his girls,

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Speaker 2: obviously so close.

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Speaker 1: How old are they now?

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Speaker 6: They're all in their thirties, so almost thirty two, thirty four,

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Speaker 6: thirty five, and thirty seven.

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Speaker 1: Wow.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, So it was nice because you know, I never

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Speaker 6: I never wanted kids. Well I didn't think I wanted kids,

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Speaker 6: and then I ended up not wanting kids, and which

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Speaker 6: is well, that was kind of a He's like I

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Speaker 6: at first he kept the option open, and then he's like,

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Speaker 6: I can't do it, and I was like, I don't

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Speaker 6: blame you. I wouldn't want to be pushing a stroller.

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Speaker 6: I don't want to push a stroller now, let alone.

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Speaker 6: It's seventy right.

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Speaker 1: You know.

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Speaker 6: And it was great because I had these three incredible

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Speaker 6: step daughters, so I just got to like drink martinis

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Speaker 6: with I didn't have to change.

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Speaker 2: I mean, that's really the way to do it, is

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Speaker 2: to get into some sort of step parenting situation if

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Speaker 2: you must, you know, because that can pay such dividends

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Speaker 2: too to joyfulness and happiness.

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Speaker 1: I have lots of step children in my life.

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Speaker 6: Well, I will say that you being so outspoken about

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Speaker 6: being child free inspired me to also be more outspoken

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Speaker 6: about it, because it is something that's a little taboo also,

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Speaker 6: and you always talking about it in the way that

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Speaker 6: you do in such a hilarious way, which I can't

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Speaker 6: do that, but you know, it just made me much

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Speaker 6: more open to talking about it more and making it

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Speaker 6: trying to normalize that a little bit, because it's weird

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Speaker 6: that it's not as normalized.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I know, it's weird that.

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Speaker 2: And what's weird to me is for any man to

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Speaker 2: think that we all automatically want to be mothers. It's like,

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Speaker 2: excuse me, where would you get that fucking idea?

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Speaker 6: Yeah, it's really crazy to me because it is something

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Speaker 6: that like, when you were let's say fifteen, did you

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Speaker 6: think you wanted or did you know? From a very

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Speaker 6: early age, it.

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Speaker 2: Was like, wait, this isn't something I would ever want.

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Speaker 2: I don't want a newborn baby.

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Speaker 6: I never wanted it, and being pregnant always terrified me,

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Speaker 6: and I never want Even when I was a kid,

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Speaker 6: I was like, I don't really like being around kids,

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Speaker 6: but I just still thought that I would because it's

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Speaker 6: just what you do, you know, It's just kind of

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Speaker 6: the way.

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Speaker 1: Of the world.

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Speaker 2: And so I was like, oh, I'm sure what they're

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Speaker 2: counting on everyone for us to think we're supposed to

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Speaker 2: do what we want, what we're you know, we're supposed

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Speaker 2: to do things and not think too much about it,

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Speaker 2: think about it, you know, And it got to the

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Speaker 2: point where I was like, wait, I do have a

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Speaker 2: choice in this.

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Speaker 6: That's crazy interesting. And then when I met Bob at

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Speaker 6: first I still kind of wanted the option, and then

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Speaker 6: he's like, no, I can't. I can't do it again.

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Speaker 6: And then I was like, all right, well, choice made

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Speaker 6: for me because it reminded me always of that Sex

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Speaker 6: and the City Line with Carrie and Charlotte, when Charlotte's like,

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Speaker 6: I can't believe you're gonna give up a baby for

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Speaker 6: a man you hardly know, and She's like, why would

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Speaker 6: I give up a man for a baby I hardly

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Speaker 6: know I want? And I was like, it's Mike drop,

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Speaker 6: end of story, you know. I was like, that's that's it.

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Speaker 6: So I was like, I'm not going to give up

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Speaker 6: this wonderful person for something I don't even think I want.

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Speaker 1: So and so now you're dating someone else. Can we

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Speaker 1: talk about who you're dating? Ye breck and Meyer, who's

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Speaker 1: an actor.

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Speaker 2: Yes, I've known him for many, many years and we

440
00:18:56,119 --> 00:18:58,159
Speaker 2: were all at the Sarah Silverman party recently.

441
00:18:58,160 --> 00:19:01,520
Speaker 1: It's like yellow, I say hello back, He's a sweetheart.

442
00:19:01,840 --> 00:19:04,320
Speaker 2: That's a big arity, by the way, between Bob and

443
00:19:04,800 --> 00:19:06,920
Speaker 2: Brecon it is it is.

444
00:19:06,840 --> 00:19:11,360
Speaker 6: And but Bob was also Bob was so he surprised

445
00:19:11,359 --> 00:19:13,840
Speaker 6: people with how tall he was. Nobody thought that he

446
00:19:13,880 --> 00:19:15,000
Speaker 6: was that tall until they saw him.

447
00:19:15,000 --> 00:19:18,000
Speaker 3: A person six fourka, that's tall.

448
00:19:18,200 --> 00:19:18,680
Speaker 1: Yeah.

449
00:19:18,720 --> 00:19:21,960
Speaker 6: It's so interesting because they do have a lot of similarities.

450
00:19:22,480 --> 00:19:26,560
Speaker 6: They're both incredibly devoted fathers, and they're both probably the

451
00:19:26,560 --> 00:19:29,560
Speaker 6: two funniest people I've ever known. But then they're also

452
00:19:29,680 --> 00:19:32,359
Speaker 6: different in so many ways. And it's great because you know,

453
00:19:32,400 --> 00:19:35,879
Speaker 6: I've joked about this recently, is that I feel that

454
00:19:35,920 --> 00:19:39,399
Speaker 6: Brecan is the only person that Bob would be okay about.

455
00:19:39,760 --> 00:19:42,600
Speaker 6: He like, would not want me dating anybody, but he's like, oh,

456
00:19:42,640 --> 00:19:45,200
Speaker 6: it's going to be somebody. Fine, at least it's Brecon,

457
00:19:45,840 --> 00:19:50,000
Speaker 6: because he really loved Brecon and respected him. But they

458
00:19:50,040 --> 00:19:52,199
Speaker 6: weren't really close. It would be weird if they were

459
00:19:52,240 --> 00:19:54,600
Speaker 6: really close. But there they were close enough to where

460
00:19:54,640 --> 00:19:58,119
Speaker 6: they really really liked and respected each other, but not

461
00:19:58,600 --> 00:19:59,119
Speaker 6: best friends.

462
00:19:59,520 --> 00:20:01,320
Speaker 1: And you like to be with funny men.

463
00:20:02,160 --> 00:20:05,720
Speaker 6: Apparently Apparently now looking back, I'm like, how how did

464
00:20:05,720 --> 00:20:07,679
Speaker 6: I ever think that that was a non negotiable, Like

465
00:20:07,720 --> 00:20:09,800
Speaker 6: that's that's a mandatory It's.

466
00:20:09,600 --> 00:20:10,879
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, right right.

467
00:20:11,280 --> 00:20:13,159
Speaker 2: I mean, it's really nice to be around a funny

468
00:20:13,160 --> 00:20:14,280
Speaker 2: guy it is.

469
00:20:15,359 --> 00:20:16,600
Speaker 1: That's very helpful.

470
00:20:16,840 --> 00:20:19,480
Speaker 6: Yeah, we just laugh all day every day.

471
00:20:19,560 --> 00:20:21,840
Speaker 1: We just crack each other up. Okay, we're going to

472
00:20:21,880 --> 00:20:23,240
Speaker 1: take a break and we're going to be right back

473
00:20:23,240 --> 00:20:31,159
Speaker 1: with Kelly Rizzo. We're back with Kelly. Okay, We're going

474
00:20:31,200 --> 00:20:33,000
Speaker 1: to take some callers. We're gonna give advice, We're going

475
00:20:33,080 --> 00:20:36,280
Speaker 1: to give out comfort. Okay, so I'm pretending I'm a therapist.

476
00:20:36,359 --> 00:20:42,520
Speaker 4: Okay, here we got exactly exactly so, Sandy says Dear Chelsea.

477
00:20:43,119 --> 00:20:46,400
Speaker 4: In twenty twelve, I lost my beautiful sixteen year old son.

478
00:20:46,720 --> 00:20:49,240
Speaker 4: I spent the next several years participating in weekly grief

479
00:20:49,280 --> 00:20:51,919
Speaker 4: support groups, where it wasn't uncommon for people to express

480
00:20:51,960 --> 00:20:54,919
Speaker 4: their guilt and dissatisfaction for the type of memorial service

481
00:20:54,920 --> 00:20:57,480
Speaker 4: they were able to provide for their loved one while

482
00:20:57,480 --> 00:20:59,879
Speaker 4: in the depths of their grief. It bothered me that

483
00:21:00,080 --> 00:21:02,920
Speaker 4: a people's lives were not being appropriately honored, and b

484
00:21:03,440 --> 00:21:06,199
Speaker 4: grieving people were feeling badly about this on top of

485
00:21:06,240 --> 00:21:08,960
Speaker 4: all the emotions that come along with grief. So five

486
00:21:09,000 --> 00:21:12,280
Speaker 4: years ago I started an event planning business specializing in

487
00:21:12,320 --> 00:21:16,160
Speaker 4: celebrations of life. This work taps into a perfect combination

488
00:21:16,240 --> 00:21:20,440
Speaker 4: of my life experience, my education in psychology, my organizational skills,

489
00:21:20,480 --> 00:21:23,480
Speaker 4: and several of my creative talents. I'm known for hosting

490
00:21:23,520 --> 00:21:25,840
Speaker 4: the best parties, and I have a deep compassion and

491
00:21:26,000 --> 00:21:29,080
Speaker 4: unending patience for people in the depths of grief. The

492
00:21:29,119 --> 00:21:31,639
Speaker 4: trouble is, since this is a unique business model in

493
00:21:31,640 --> 00:21:33,760
Speaker 4: the United States, I'm afraid that I'm a bit ahead

494
00:21:33,760 --> 00:21:36,760
Speaker 4: of my time. I'm an introverted creative type who is

495
00:21:36,880 --> 00:21:39,920
Speaker 4: uncomfortable selling myself and have been struggling with figuring out

496
00:21:40,000 --> 00:21:42,879
Speaker 4: how to reach people who need my services. After some

497
00:21:42,880 --> 00:21:45,679
Speaker 4: slow periods last year, I incorporated planning other types of

498
00:21:45,720 --> 00:21:48,600
Speaker 4: events into my business. I've heard you talk about your

499
00:21:48,600 --> 00:21:51,920
Speaker 4: preference for celebrations of life over funerals on past episodes

500
00:21:51,920 --> 00:21:53,840
Speaker 4: of Dear Chelsea, so I thought i'd ask you for

501
00:21:53,880 --> 00:21:56,320
Speaker 4: your thoughts on this career path I've chosen and desperately

502
00:21:56,320 --> 00:21:58,920
Speaker 4: do not want to give up, because truly, no one

503
00:21:58,920 --> 00:22:01,320
Speaker 4: needs an event planner more than people suffering from grief.

504
00:22:01,600 --> 00:22:03,560
Speaker 4: Am I too ahead of my time for this endeavor?

505
00:22:03,760 --> 00:22:06,080
Speaker 4: How do I lead the way into establishing new norms

506
00:22:06,080 --> 00:22:08,520
Speaker 4: for celebrating our dead in a society that doesn't seem

507
00:22:08,600 --> 00:22:10,159
Speaker 4: quite ready to think outside the box.

508
00:22:10,400 --> 00:22:12,640
Speaker 3: I'd love your input. All the best, Sandy.

509
00:22:13,400 --> 00:22:15,160
Speaker 5: Hi, Sandy, Hi Chelsea.

510
00:22:15,480 --> 00:22:18,080
Speaker 2: Hi there, this is our special guest Kelly Rizzos with

511
00:22:18,160 --> 00:22:18,720
Speaker 2: us today.

512
00:22:19,160 --> 00:22:20,400
Speaker 6: Hi Kelly, Hi Sandy.

513
00:22:20,760 --> 00:22:22,920
Speaker 2: I love that idea. I mean, that's what we had

514
00:22:22,920 --> 00:22:24,960
Speaker 2: for Bob right celebration of life.

515
00:22:25,600 --> 00:22:28,199
Speaker 6: Yeah, I mean, I just have to say, that is

516
00:22:28,280 --> 00:22:32,639
Speaker 6: the most incredible idea I have ever heard. And I

517
00:22:32,680 --> 00:22:36,400
Speaker 6: can't tell you how incredibly valuable that would have been

518
00:22:37,200 --> 00:22:40,080
Speaker 6: for me at the time I was in I mean,

519
00:22:40,600 --> 00:22:43,480
Speaker 6: I was incapable of doing anything, but I also fortunately

520
00:22:43,680 --> 00:22:45,359
Speaker 6: didn't have to do anything because a lot of people

521
00:22:45,359 --> 00:22:49,200
Speaker 6: stepped up. But there, to me is such a need

522
00:22:49,240 --> 00:22:53,960
Speaker 6: for that, and for you to even feel the slightest

523
00:22:54,000 --> 00:22:56,399
Speaker 6: bit of negativity around that, I just I hope that

524
00:22:56,960 --> 00:22:59,959
Speaker 6: you can embrace it fully because it is so neat,

525
00:23:00,800 --> 00:23:05,320
Speaker 6: is so important, and I've never heard of anyone doing that.

526
00:23:05,480 --> 00:23:08,280
Speaker 6: So to me, it's like you're kind of one in

527
00:23:08,320 --> 00:23:08,680
Speaker 6: a million.

528
00:23:08,760 --> 00:23:10,720
Speaker 2: Yeah, it feels like I'm like, it feels like a

529
00:23:10,720 --> 00:23:13,200
Speaker 2: service that will help many, many people. I think it's

530
00:23:13,240 --> 00:23:15,240
Speaker 2: just a matter of you getting the message out there.

531
00:23:15,640 --> 00:23:18,320
Speaker 2: It sounds like, so what is your like, where are

532
00:23:18,359 --> 00:23:20,040
Speaker 2: you what's your business strategy?

533
00:23:20,119 --> 00:23:21,360
Speaker 1: What have you been doing thus far?

534
00:23:22,320 --> 00:23:25,199
Speaker 5: Well, like I said, I did have to switch to

535
00:23:25,440 --> 00:23:29,280
Speaker 5: adding more events to my repertoire and just offering my

536
00:23:29,359 --> 00:23:33,399
Speaker 5: services to a wider scope of events, which has been fun.

537
00:23:33,520 --> 00:23:38,080
Speaker 5: But my heart really is with the grieving. So after

538
00:23:38,119 --> 00:23:40,439
Speaker 5: the pandemic, I was slammed with work. I had a

539
00:23:40,560 --> 00:23:42,960
Speaker 5: bunch and then it just suddenly dropped off and it

540
00:23:43,000 --> 00:23:44,520
Speaker 5: wasn't even people who died of COVID.

541
00:23:44,800 --> 00:23:45,920
Speaker 1: And where do you live?

542
00:23:46,040 --> 00:23:47,879
Speaker 5: I live in Bellingham, Washington, Okay?

543
00:23:47,920 --> 00:23:48,560
Speaker 1: And so is there?

544
00:23:48,720 --> 00:23:53,080
Speaker 5: How are you marketing this social media? Mostly I've reached

545
00:23:53,119 --> 00:23:55,720
Speaker 5: out to other event planners to let them know that

546
00:23:55,760 --> 00:23:57,879
Speaker 5: I specialize in this in case it's something that they

547
00:23:57,920 --> 00:24:01,080
Speaker 5: don't want to take on. I have, you know, all

548
00:24:01,119 --> 00:24:03,960
Speaker 5: of the funeral homes know that I exist. I've pretty

549
00:24:04,000 --> 00:24:05,920
Speaker 5: much covered everything that I can think.

550
00:24:05,920 --> 00:24:08,199
Speaker 1: Well, what about advertising with the obituaries?

551
00:24:08,800 --> 00:24:11,920
Speaker 5: You know, people don't really do obituaries very much anymore,

552
00:24:12,040 --> 00:24:12,320
Speaker 5: do they?

553
00:24:12,400 --> 00:24:14,119
Speaker 1: I guess not in the hard papers. They don't do

554
00:24:14,160 --> 00:24:15,040
Speaker 1: them online?

555
00:24:15,480 --> 00:24:18,600
Speaker 5: Yeah, not very often. They are done through the funeral homes.

556
00:24:18,600 --> 00:24:21,760
Speaker 5: And honestly, I'm kind of in competition with the funeral homes.

557
00:24:21,800 --> 00:24:23,320
Speaker 5: So they don't, you know.

558
00:24:24,320 --> 00:24:25,280
Speaker 1: I would think A.

559
00:24:25,520 --> 00:24:27,320
Speaker 2: I think obviously you want to broad in your social

560
00:24:27,359 --> 00:24:30,359
Speaker 2: media advertisement as much as you can by spreading the

561
00:24:30,359 --> 00:24:33,200
Speaker 2: word and having people who have used your business continue

562
00:24:33,240 --> 00:24:35,920
Speaker 2: to spread the word, but also making sure that your

563
00:24:35,960 --> 00:24:39,720
Speaker 2: messaging is in temples and churches and congregations that are

564
00:24:39,720 --> 00:24:42,320
Speaker 2: in your area to let people know that there's another

565
00:24:42,359 --> 00:24:46,920
Speaker 2: option other than a funeral organizations or like even retirement

566
00:24:46,960 --> 00:24:49,760
Speaker 2: homes going into their Have you done that?

567
00:24:50,359 --> 00:24:50,600
Speaker 4: Yeah?

568
00:24:50,720 --> 00:24:51,960
Speaker 1: Yeah.

569
00:24:52,080 --> 00:24:54,760
Speaker 4: There might also be an opportunity, sort of a business

570
00:24:54,800 --> 00:24:58,960
Speaker 4: to business opportunity talking to elder law and estate planning attorneys.

571
00:24:59,240 --> 00:25:01,600
Speaker 5: I did that as well. Did you already it saturate?

572
00:25:01,680 --> 00:25:01,880
Speaker 4: Yeah.

573
00:25:01,880 --> 00:25:04,560
Speaker 5: I sent out marketing materials to all of them. Yeah.

574
00:25:05,000 --> 00:25:08,000
Speaker 4: It may be a little bit more of interacting with

575
00:25:08,040 --> 00:25:11,919
Speaker 4: them on a personal basis, like calling, having a meeting,

576
00:25:12,080 --> 00:25:14,639
Speaker 4: sitting down talking to them a little bit about why

577
00:25:14,680 --> 00:25:16,800
Speaker 4: this is something somebody might want to include actually in

578
00:25:16,840 --> 00:25:21,040
Speaker 4: their estate plans, because marketing like it's so like you said,

579
00:25:21,080 --> 00:25:23,119
Speaker 4: outside the box four people in the US, that it

580
00:25:23,240 --> 00:25:26,639
Speaker 4: might take more like maybe you are having events and

581
00:25:26,680 --> 00:25:29,280
Speaker 4: speaking for fifteen minutes about like why you feel like

582
00:25:29,320 --> 00:25:32,040
Speaker 4: this is an even better way to celebrate someone's life.

583
00:25:32,280 --> 00:25:33,240
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's a great idea.

584
00:25:33,520 --> 00:25:35,399
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, if you could do that, Like if you

585
00:25:35,400 --> 00:25:39,480
Speaker 2: could talk to people's families at a retirement community, or

586
00:25:39,520 --> 00:25:40,120
Speaker 2: you go in and.

587
00:25:40,080 --> 00:25:41,639
Speaker 1: You talk to all the people in the home.

588
00:25:41,760 --> 00:25:44,080
Speaker 2: You know, how do you want to spend how do

589
00:25:44,160 --> 00:25:46,120
Speaker 2: you want to be celebrated when your life is over?

590
00:25:46,160 --> 00:25:47,600
Speaker 1: Here? Do you want to have a funeral?

591
00:25:47,680 --> 00:25:50,040
Speaker 2: Like I'm here to offer something If this sounds I mean,

592
00:25:50,080 --> 00:25:52,159
Speaker 2: you really do have to kind of have a conversation

593
00:25:52,240 --> 00:25:54,400
Speaker 2: with them about it. I think that's how you get

594
00:25:54,400 --> 00:25:57,719
Speaker 2: people to convert to the idea of not you know,

595
00:25:57,920 --> 00:26:01,680
Speaker 2: a funeral is so funereal, so depressing. You know, there

596
00:26:01,760 --> 00:26:05,159
Speaker 2: is an upbeat, more positive way of looking at like

597
00:26:05,200 --> 00:26:08,560
Speaker 2: transitioning out of life. And I mean even talking to

598
00:26:08,600 --> 00:26:12,359
Speaker 2: people in hospitals, you know, who are dealing with like

599
00:26:12,440 --> 00:26:15,520
Speaker 2: difficult decisions and stuff like that. But I feel like

600
00:26:15,560 --> 00:26:18,120
Speaker 2: retirement communities are just so like if you could talk

601
00:26:18,160 --> 00:26:19,720
Speaker 2: to the people that are there, and if you could

602
00:26:19,720 --> 00:26:22,840
Speaker 2: talk to family members of the people that are there

603
00:26:22,920 --> 00:26:25,040
Speaker 2: to give them the option, because I'm sure it's more.

604
00:26:25,080 --> 00:26:26,960
Speaker 1: I mean, everyone has to either bury or.

605
00:26:27,080 --> 00:26:30,359
Speaker 2: Cremate somebody, right, Yeah, so there's that cost anyway, But

606
00:26:30,720 --> 00:26:33,000
Speaker 2: are your costs kind of commensurate with the cost of

607
00:26:33,040 --> 00:26:33,600
Speaker 2: a funeral?

608
00:26:33,960 --> 00:26:36,600
Speaker 5: Yeah, And I mean I've had to keep them that way,

609
00:26:36,840 --> 00:26:40,200
Speaker 5: even though what I create is far better than, yes,

610
00:26:40,240 --> 00:26:44,160
Speaker 5: what the average funeral is. And I'll tell you what

611
00:26:44,240 --> 00:26:49,840
Speaker 5: I have found is elderly people. They have their plans

612
00:26:49,920 --> 00:26:51,199
Speaker 5: kind of set in place, and a lot of them

613
00:26:51,240 --> 00:26:54,280
Speaker 5: don't want anything. And they also have lived long enough

614
00:26:54,320 --> 00:26:56,560
Speaker 5: that a lot of their friends are no longer here

615
00:26:57,040 --> 00:27:00,639
Speaker 5: to participate. So those aren't really the people that have

616
00:27:00,920 --> 00:27:06,520
Speaker 5: hired me. It has been people who have lost somebody tragically, suddenly, unexpectedly,

617
00:27:06,640 --> 00:27:09,560
Speaker 5: far too young, who are just wiped out by grief

618
00:27:09,600 --> 00:27:14,040
Speaker 5: and need somebody to step in and celebrate. I've helped

619
00:27:14,080 --> 00:27:17,560
Speaker 5: celebrate some pretty incredible people in some pretty incredible ways.

620
00:27:18,280 --> 00:27:20,320
Speaker 5: So it's been, you know, it's all been just a

621
00:27:20,400 --> 00:27:23,960
Speaker 5: learning curve because there's no like literally, I think there's

622
00:27:24,040 --> 00:27:27,600
Speaker 5: five businesses in the entire country that do what I do,

623
00:27:28,240 --> 00:27:30,320
Speaker 5: and I was one of the first, so and none

624
00:27:30,359 --> 00:27:33,000
Speaker 5: of us are getting very much work. So it's just

625
00:27:33,040 --> 00:27:34,960
Speaker 5: a really new concept.

626
00:27:34,760 --> 00:27:37,520
Speaker 6: Isn't One of the big selling points also, that a

627
00:27:37,600 --> 00:27:40,600
Speaker 6: funeral is usually within a few days to a week

628
00:27:40,720 --> 00:27:44,320
Speaker 6: or so after somebody passes, where what you're doing kind

629
00:27:44,320 --> 00:27:49,880
Speaker 6: of gives them more time to prepare and to plan something.

630
00:27:49,880 --> 00:27:50,439
Speaker 1: W'ere a funeral.

631
00:27:50,480 --> 00:27:52,840
Speaker 6: I mean, you're so rushed, and sometimes you're like, I mean,

632
00:27:52,840 --> 00:27:55,280
Speaker 6: for instance, Bob and I never ever talked about what

633
00:27:55,920 --> 00:27:59,480
Speaker 6: he wanted. Fortunately, you know, obviously with his family and

634
00:27:59,520 --> 00:28:03,399
Speaker 6: everything so involved, Like we did what we think he

635
00:28:03,440 --> 00:28:06,240
Speaker 6: would actually really have loved, but we never talked about it,

636
00:28:06,280 --> 00:28:08,639
Speaker 6: so I didn't know, and we were so rushed, you know,

637
00:28:08,680 --> 00:28:11,560
Speaker 6: everything happened so quickly that you're like, oh God, am

638
00:28:11,560 --> 00:28:13,520
Speaker 6: I doing this right? What am I doing to where

639
00:28:13,560 --> 00:28:16,600
Speaker 6: your services? You know, you can have much more time

640
00:28:16,640 --> 00:28:19,320
Speaker 6: to prepare and do it right and do what you

641
00:28:19,359 --> 00:28:20,879
Speaker 6: think the person would really have wanted.

642
00:28:21,560 --> 00:28:24,280
Speaker 5: And I do always encourage my people not to try

643
00:28:24,359 --> 00:28:27,240
Speaker 5: not to rush it. There's some who just need it

644
00:28:27,280 --> 00:28:29,720
Speaker 5: to be over with that For the most part, people

645
00:28:29,800 --> 00:28:31,840
Speaker 5: want to take the time so they can get used

646
00:28:31,880 --> 00:28:33,640
Speaker 5: to the idea that they need to do this thing.

647
00:28:33,840 --> 00:28:37,000
Speaker 5: And the more time I have, the more epic I

648
00:28:37,040 --> 00:28:40,080
Speaker 5: can truly make the event be for them and really

649
00:28:40,240 --> 00:28:42,840
Speaker 5: dig into who the person was and find ways to

650
00:28:42,880 --> 00:28:46,440
Speaker 5: reflect who they were in this celebration that we're creating

651
00:28:46,440 --> 00:28:51,320
Speaker 5: of their life, and everybody loves the events. I've had

652
00:28:52,320 --> 00:28:55,800
Speaker 5: families tell me that, you know, they were absolutely terrified

653
00:28:55,800 --> 00:29:00,520
Speaker 5: and dreading coming to their person's celebration of life, but

654
00:29:00,680 --> 00:29:05,120
Speaker 5: felt an overwhelming sense of joy and love when they left.

655
00:29:05,960 --> 00:29:08,720
Speaker 5: So it's kind of a magical service that I can

656
00:29:08,720 --> 00:29:11,720
Speaker 5: provide for people. And beyond just creating the event, I

657
00:29:11,840 --> 00:29:16,920
Speaker 5: provide I know what grief is like, and I provide

658
00:29:17,080 --> 00:29:19,520
Speaker 5: support and let them know that they're not crazy while

659
00:29:19,520 --> 00:29:22,840
Speaker 5: they're going through you know, what they're experiencing, sometimes for

660
00:29:22,880 --> 00:29:24,080
Speaker 5: the first time in their lives.

661
00:29:24,480 --> 00:29:26,760
Speaker 1: Yeah, okay, well we're going to we'll help you. Promoted

662
00:29:26,840 --> 00:29:28,600
Speaker 1: on this podcast. What is the name of your.

663
00:29:28,480 --> 00:29:30,880
Speaker 5: Business, Epic Celebrations and.

664
00:29:30,920 --> 00:29:33,440
Speaker 1: You service anywhere in the country or is it just

665
00:29:33,480 --> 00:29:34,160
Speaker 1: in your area?

666
00:29:34,640 --> 00:29:39,880
Speaker 5: I generally work between Bellingham and Seattle, Okay in county.

667
00:29:39,880 --> 00:29:42,520
Speaker 5: Excuse me, but I am certainly willing to travel for

668
00:29:42,640 --> 00:29:43,400
Speaker 5: my services.

669
00:29:43,680 --> 00:29:45,440
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, well I think Yeah.

670
00:29:45,480 --> 00:29:48,000
Speaker 2: I'm sorry, we don't have a better like mark business

671
00:29:48,080 --> 00:29:50,880
Speaker 2: strategy for you, but we will try to spread the

672
00:29:50,880 --> 00:29:52,960
Speaker 2: word over here because I think that is the definite

673
00:29:53,000 --> 00:29:55,040
Speaker 2: way to deal with losing a loved one, especially in

674
00:29:55,120 --> 00:29:57,640
Speaker 2: a tragic way, you know, you don't you want to

675
00:29:57,680 --> 00:29:59,880
Speaker 2: go out with remembering all of the beauty that they

676
00:30:00,040 --> 00:30:03,800
Speaker 2: brought and kind of having a more modern way of

677
00:30:03,840 --> 00:30:07,640
Speaker 2: looking at death rather than death being the final you know,

678
00:30:07,880 --> 00:30:10,200
Speaker 2: and such an ending and such a smack in the face.

679
00:30:10,480 --> 00:30:13,920
Speaker 2: And especially for people who you who lose loved ones unexpectedly,

680
00:30:13,960 --> 00:30:14,960
Speaker 2: that's exactly.

681
00:30:14,560 --> 00:30:16,280
Speaker 1: What you need, you know, in the face of that.

682
00:30:16,720 --> 00:30:17,520
Speaker 3: Yeah, well, I.

683
00:30:17,440 --> 00:30:19,880
Speaker 6: Will definitely keep it in mind too since I deal with, yeah,

684
00:30:19,920 --> 00:30:21,640
Speaker 6: a lot of greeting people all the time.

685
00:30:22,200 --> 00:30:24,760
Speaker 5: H Yeah, Well, I think it's just really important to, like,

686
00:30:25,040 --> 00:30:28,080
Speaker 5: I appreciate the opportunity to put the idea out there

687
00:30:28,080 --> 00:30:31,520
Speaker 5: in a larger sphere, you know, so people are thinking about,

688
00:30:31,640 --> 00:30:33,440
Speaker 5: you know, different ways, and that there are people who

689
00:30:33,440 --> 00:30:37,200
Speaker 5: can help in that, and just to start thinking about

690
00:30:37,400 --> 00:30:40,600
Speaker 5: thinking outside the box of what you know, we how

691
00:30:40,640 --> 00:30:43,240
Speaker 5: we celebrate the lives of our people once they're not here.

692
00:30:43,560 --> 00:30:46,360
Speaker 2: And also, you know, another way to kind of maybe

693
00:30:46,440 --> 00:30:49,000
Speaker 2: outreach for you to do is people are able to

694
00:30:49,000 --> 00:30:53,520
Speaker 2: get euthanized in Oregon, so if they're planning that and Washington, right,

695
00:30:53,560 --> 00:30:56,400
Speaker 2: oh right, yeah, So I mean, is there any way

696
00:30:56,440 --> 00:31:01,240
Speaker 2: to kind of couple your services or with with those

697
00:31:01,400 --> 00:31:04,080
Speaker 2: with those programs that are actually because those people know

698
00:31:04,120 --> 00:31:06,400
Speaker 2: they're going to die, and that's kind of what they.

699
00:31:06,840 --> 00:31:08,520
Speaker 3: Can be around for their celebration of life.

700
00:31:08,600 --> 00:31:10,760
Speaker 5: Right. Yeah, And one of the services that I offer.

701
00:31:10,880 --> 00:31:13,840
Speaker 5: You spoke with Katie Kuric about this on a previous podcast,

702
00:31:13,840 --> 00:31:16,240
Speaker 5: which was part of what led me to contact you,

703
00:31:16,400 --> 00:31:18,800
Speaker 5: was she talked about the idea of living memorials for

704
00:31:18,840 --> 00:31:21,240
Speaker 5: when somebody is sick and know they're going to pass,

705
00:31:21,280 --> 00:31:24,560
Speaker 5: and then having a celebration when they have all of

706
00:31:24,560 --> 00:31:26,680
Speaker 5: the people around them who can hug them and love

707
00:31:26,720 --> 00:31:28,680
Speaker 5: on them one last time so that they leave this

708
00:31:28,760 --> 00:31:33,280
Speaker 5: world feeling full of love instead of fear. Yeah.

709
00:31:33,320 --> 00:31:34,960
Speaker 1: That's really beautiful idea too.

710
00:31:35,160 --> 00:31:37,600
Speaker 5: So yeah, yeah, and that's one of the services I offer.

711
00:31:37,720 --> 00:31:39,560
Speaker 5: But haven't been taken up on that one yet.

712
00:31:39,960 --> 00:31:42,520
Speaker 2: Okay, Well, I think it will happen. I think people

713
00:31:42,600 --> 00:31:45,000
Speaker 2: will come around to this idea. It's very you. You

714
00:31:45,040 --> 00:31:46,520
Speaker 2: are a little ahead of your time, but that's a

715
00:31:46,520 --> 00:31:48,840
Speaker 2: good thing. That's not a bad thing. What are the

716
00:31:48,880 --> 00:31:51,400
Speaker 2: other events that you're doing to supplement your company.

717
00:31:51,480 --> 00:31:54,080
Speaker 5: I've done some corporate events and I've done some baby showers.

718
00:31:54,120 --> 00:31:56,320
Speaker 5: So it's been kind of fun to work on the

719
00:31:56,320 --> 00:31:59,240
Speaker 5: opposite end of things. Yeah, I did some birthday parties,

720
00:31:59,280 --> 00:32:02,560
Speaker 5: and it's been really joyful to actually get to meet

721
00:32:02,600 --> 00:32:05,600
Speaker 5: the people that I'm helping plan parties for. You know,

722
00:32:05,760 --> 00:32:08,120
Speaker 5: I tend to fall in love with the honorees that

723
00:32:08,160 --> 00:32:11,080
Speaker 5: I create celebrations of life for, and then I don't

724
00:32:11,600 --> 00:32:13,760
Speaker 5: get to meet them. I just have to find ways

725
00:32:13,800 --> 00:32:17,160
Speaker 5: of bringing a piece of who they were into me

726
00:32:17,240 --> 00:32:19,760
Speaker 5: and holding them in my heart even though I never

727
00:32:19,800 --> 00:32:22,400
Speaker 5: get to meet them. But it's really it's pretty heartbreaking

728
00:32:22,440 --> 00:32:24,960
Speaker 5: to know that I've missed out on knowing some really

729
00:32:25,000 --> 00:32:26,720
Speaker 5: really cool people in this world.

730
00:32:27,800 --> 00:32:30,840
Speaker 1: Yeah, the circle of life, Yeah, the whole spectrum.

731
00:32:31,040 --> 00:32:33,480
Speaker 2: Well, good for you for doing this work. It's really

732
00:32:33,480 --> 00:32:35,560
Speaker 2: really you meaningful, you know.

733
00:32:35,760 --> 00:32:38,040
Speaker 5: Thank you. Thanks for bringing attention to it.

734
00:32:38,240 --> 00:32:40,280
Speaker 3: Yeah, Sandy, so tell us one more time. It's Epic

735
00:32:40,320 --> 00:32:41,360
Speaker 3: Celebrations dot.

736
00:32:41,200 --> 00:32:45,680
Speaker 5: Com, Epic Celebrations NW for Northwest dot Com.

737
00:32:45,920 --> 00:32:48,440
Speaker 4: All right, great, Well, let's also offline a little bit

738
00:32:48,480 --> 00:32:50,960
Speaker 4: more about potential B to B strategies. I'd like to

739
00:32:51,000 --> 00:32:53,200
Speaker 4: hear kind of like what all of you tried and

740
00:32:53,200 --> 00:32:55,640
Speaker 4: and offer some suggestions for more stuff to try.

741
00:32:55,720 --> 00:32:58,880
Speaker 5: Okay, all right, thanks Sandy, Thanks everybody.

742
00:32:58,520 --> 00:33:02,000
Speaker 1: Thank you bye bye bye. That is it?

743
00:33:02,040 --> 00:33:05,160
Speaker 3: That is a really cool idea, really cool, right, Yeah.

744
00:33:05,240 --> 00:33:07,160
Speaker 4: I just feel like getting that idea in front of

745
00:33:07,240 --> 00:33:09,640
Speaker 4: people in a way where you know, obviously you don't

746
00:33:09,640 --> 00:33:11,479
Speaker 4: know if somebody's going to have a sudden death, but

747
00:33:11,800 --> 00:33:13,840
Speaker 4: where it's sort of like they remember, like, oh my gosh,

748
00:33:13,840 --> 00:33:15,920
Speaker 4: there's a woman who came and spoke at such and

749
00:33:15,960 --> 00:33:18,760
Speaker 4: such like two years ago, and she would be perfect

750
00:33:18,760 --> 00:33:20,400
Speaker 4: to jump in and help out with this.

751
00:33:20,520 --> 00:33:22,600
Speaker 6: Oh well, now I know about it'll be on my radar.

752
00:33:22,640 --> 00:33:24,840
Speaker 6: And yeah, as you said, she's a bit ahead of

753
00:33:24,840 --> 00:33:29,040
Speaker 6: her time, but there's also very little competition, so m m.

754
00:33:29,400 --> 00:33:30,440
Speaker 3: Yeah, right exactly.

755
00:33:30,520 --> 00:33:33,040
Speaker 2: That's also nice for people who have a terminal diagnosis

756
00:33:33,320 --> 00:33:36,240
Speaker 2: to make this kind of plan, you know, people who

757
00:33:36,280 --> 00:33:40,320
Speaker 2: know that they're not going to make it, and they

758
00:33:40,360 --> 00:33:43,480
Speaker 2: could plan an either life celebration before they pass on,

759
00:33:44,200 --> 00:33:47,880
Speaker 2: or you know, employ her to actually make their funeral

760
00:33:48,000 --> 00:33:49,800
Speaker 2: something that they're going to want to be at.

761
00:33:49,920 --> 00:33:51,840
Speaker 1: You know, you know, what do you think about that?

762
00:33:51,880 --> 00:33:55,600
Speaker 6: The where you're at your own funeral almost.

763
00:33:55,600 --> 00:33:59,160
Speaker 1: I mean, I'm down for that. I don't mind that idea.

764
00:33:59,440 --> 00:34:00,800
Speaker 1: Hardy's like, wait, that'd be amazing.

765
00:34:00,880 --> 00:34:02,680
Speaker 6: The part of me is like, oh wow, that's you

766
00:34:02,720 --> 00:34:04,960
Speaker 6: always have those dreams of like being at your own funeral,

767
00:34:05,000 --> 00:34:06,560
Speaker 6: like what that would be like, you know, like did

768
00:34:06,560 --> 00:34:07,640
Speaker 6: would anybody show up?

769
00:34:08,120 --> 00:34:11,200
Speaker 1: And then it's like you get to see who shows up? Yeah?

770
00:34:11,520 --> 00:34:14,200
Speaker 2: Yeah, I like the idea of a celebration of life

771
00:34:14,200 --> 00:34:16,000
Speaker 2: for sure, because I don't want a funeral.

772
00:34:16,360 --> 00:34:17,360
Speaker 1: I want a party.

773
00:34:17,560 --> 00:34:19,480
Speaker 4: Yeah, but it's a little easier to party while the

774
00:34:19,480 --> 00:34:20,600
Speaker 4: person's still there.

775
00:34:20,640 --> 00:34:23,080
Speaker 1: Yeah, or have a party in my honor without me.

776
00:34:23,160 --> 00:34:23,960
Speaker 1: I'm fine either way.

777
00:34:24,080 --> 00:34:25,880
Speaker 3: Yeah. And there's just been plates of drugs everywhere.

778
00:34:25,920 --> 00:34:28,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, plates of drugs. Musham's to see all of that

779
00:34:28,680 --> 00:34:30,080
Speaker 2: good stuff more.

780
00:34:30,239 --> 00:34:33,480
Speaker 4: Next question is not about grief, but this comes from

781
00:34:33,760 --> 00:34:37,920
Speaker 4: they're using thoseudonyms spiraling. Dear Chelsea. I'm a forty year

782
00:34:37,920 --> 00:34:40,400
Speaker 4: old woman who recently moved to a new city and state.

783
00:34:40,760 --> 00:34:43,640
Speaker 4: I really enjoy playing tennis, and since moving, I've joined

784
00:34:43,640 --> 00:34:45,640
Speaker 4: some leagues and have been meeting a lot of people.

785
00:34:46,520 --> 00:34:47,400
Speaker 3: Last Sunday, I was.

786
00:34:47,400 --> 00:34:49,319
Speaker 4: Playing tennis with one of my teams, and I think

787
00:34:49,360 --> 00:34:52,520
Speaker 4: I overheard our team captain talking about me to another teammate.

788
00:34:53,000 --> 00:34:55,719
Speaker 4: She said about me, she doesn't look like she'd be good,

789
00:34:55,719 --> 00:34:59,239
Speaker 4: but she is right. I cannot stop thinking about it.

790
00:35:00,000 --> 00:35:02,520
Speaker 4: Always been self conscious, so the comment cut really deep.

791
00:35:03,200 --> 00:35:04,960
Speaker 4: I don't think the captain was trying to talk bad

792
00:35:05,000 --> 00:35:07,359
Speaker 4: about me. I actually think she was trying to say

793
00:35:07,360 --> 00:35:09,680
Speaker 4: something nice about me. But it's really caused me to

794
00:35:09,719 --> 00:35:12,719
Speaker 4: spiral a bit. She also doesn't know I overheard her.

795
00:35:13,080 --> 00:35:15,160
Speaker 4: I mean, what's wrong with me? Why can't I just

796
00:35:15,160 --> 00:35:17,200
Speaker 4: focus on the good part and not on the looks part?

797
00:35:17,360 --> 00:35:19,520
Speaker 4: Any advice, sincerely, Spiraling.

798
00:35:20,560 --> 00:35:22,880
Speaker 2: We're talking about we were talking about dark you know,

799
00:35:23,120 --> 00:35:26,240
Speaker 2: your dark side, Like we all have a shadow self,

800
00:35:26,480 --> 00:35:29,399
Speaker 2: and our shadow self is you know some psychiatrists refer

801
00:35:29,520 --> 00:35:33,400
Speaker 2: to that. Some people is like, oh, it's just your ego,

802
00:35:34,160 --> 00:35:36,680
Speaker 2: however you want to frame it. We have voices in

803
00:35:36,719 --> 00:35:39,160
Speaker 2: our head that are telling us one story, and then

804
00:35:39,200 --> 00:35:42,080
Speaker 2: there's reality. And the reality is that she was giving

805
00:35:42,080 --> 00:35:44,400
Speaker 2: you a compliment, and who gives a shit what she

806
00:35:44,560 --> 00:35:47,080
Speaker 2: thinks about whether or not you look like you're a

807
00:35:47,080 --> 00:35:49,799
Speaker 2: good athlete or not. The compliment is that you are,

808
00:35:50,360 --> 00:35:53,600
Speaker 2: and she's surprised. That's all her business, Like, it's none

809
00:35:53,640 --> 00:35:56,319
Speaker 2: of your business. But the thoughts that you're having that

810
00:35:56,360 --> 00:35:59,680
Speaker 2: are related to this are your insecure thoughts, your ego thoughts,

811
00:35:59,719 --> 00:36:02,440
Speaker 2: your shut of self thoughts. That is your job to

812
00:36:02,520 --> 00:36:05,880
Speaker 2: quiet those thoughts, and that is through like daily work

813
00:36:05,960 --> 00:36:10,360
Speaker 2: to understand that other people's opinions of you don't matter.

814
00:36:10,480 --> 00:36:11,680
Speaker 1: They're not your business.

815
00:36:12,239 --> 00:36:14,920
Speaker 2: And sometimes even when they tell you about their opinions

816
00:36:14,920 --> 00:36:17,279
Speaker 2: of you, it doesn't matter. You're not as long as

817
00:36:17,280 --> 00:36:19,920
Speaker 2: you're not hurting someone, hurting someone's feelings, or be acting

818
00:36:19,960 --> 00:36:22,799
Speaker 2: in a destructive way towards yourself or towards others. That

819
00:36:22,960 --> 00:36:25,080
Speaker 2: is work you have to do on yourself, and that's

820
00:36:25,120 --> 00:36:28,960
Speaker 2: can be daily affirmations of why of all the things

821
00:36:29,280 --> 00:36:32,480
Speaker 2: that you see about yourself, that you are strong, that

822
00:36:32,520 --> 00:36:36,239
Speaker 2: you are capable, that you're active in your sport, and

823
00:36:36,320 --> 00:36:38,000
Speaker 2: all of the other good things that you have in

824
00:36:38,040 --> 00:36:42,200
Speaker 2: your life, or a gratitude journal, you know, writing down

825
00:36:42,239 --> 00:36:45,120
Speaker 2: ten things that you're happy and grateful about. You just

826
00:36:45,239 --> 00:36:47,000
Speaker 2: kind of have to get to like a little bit

827
00:36:47,000 --> 00:36:50,280
Speaker 2: of a higher frequency than to let all these little

828
00:36:50,320 --> 00:36:52,640
Speaker 2: comments from other people that you weren't even supposed to

829
00:36:52,719 --> 00:36:55,400
Speaker 2: hear in the first place. Remember, you weren't supposed to

830
00:36:55,480 --> 00:36:57,000
Speaker 2: hear that in the first place. If she had a

831
00:36:57,080 --> 00:36:59,440
Speaker 2: choice to say that with knowing you would hear it,

832
00:36:59,480 --> 00:37:01,480
Speaker 2: she wouldn't I have chosen for you to hear it.

833
00:37:01,800 --> 00:37:03,879
Speaker 2: Therefore there's nothing for you to do about it. You're

834
00:37:03,880 --> 00:37:06,279
Speaker 2: definitely not gonna say anything to her about it.

835
00:37:06,320 --> 00:37:10,000
Speaker 1: Who cares? You don't want to? Like that's aggravating an issue.

836
00:37:10,200 --> 00:37:12,600
Speaker 2: But I think all of our negative self talk like

837
00:37:13,000 --> 00:37:16,200
Speaker 2: that is a daily exercise that you have to recognize

838
00:37:16,200 --> 00:37:19,200
Speaker 2: that you're doing a And now you recognize that you're

839
00:37:19,239 --> 00:37:21,160
Speaker 2: doing it, I'm telling you that you're doing it. You

840
00:37:21,360 --> 00:37:23,839
Speaker 2: wrote in because of this, and you have to start

841
00:37:23,880 --> 00:37:27,239
Speaker 2: to disassemble that. And every day is like, I am

842
00:37:27,280 --> 00:37:29,839
Speaker 2: not what other people think about me. I am what

843
00:37:29,920 --> 00:37:33,239
Speaker 2: I am, And you're contributing in a valuable way to

844
00:37:33,280 --> 00:37:36,759
Speaker 2: something that you really enjoy. That's your takeaway, not the

845
00:37:36,760 --> 00:37:40,880
Speaker 2: negative thing that is meaningless to me. So, while I

846
00:37:40,960 --> 00:37:43,759
Speaker 2: know it's difficult to hear things about yourself sometime, I

847
00:37:43,880 --> 00:37:46,160
Speaker 2: really just would want to implore you to like dig

848
00:37:46,200 --> 00:37:48,640
Speaker 2: a little deeper into who you really are, the essence

849
00:37:48,640 --> 00:37:51,759
Speaker 2: of who you are as a person, and then you

850
00:37:51,840 --> 00:37:54,680
Speaker 2: become a lot less affected by what other people think

851
00:37:54,719 --> 00:37:57,719
Speaker 2: of you. And that can work with meditation too. You

852
00:37:57,719 --> 00:38:01,160
Speaker 2: can achieve that goal through meditation, through graditude lists, through

853
00:38:01,480 --> 00:38:04,479
Speaker 2: affirmations every day. But I would pick one of those

854
00:38:04,520 --> 00:38:07,560
Speaker 2: things and really focus on doing that activity every single

855
00:38:07,640 --> 00:38:10,120
Speaker 2: day to just kind of bring yourself up a little

856
00:38:10,160 --> 00:38:13,040
Speaker 2: bit more so you're not as vulnerable to others in

857
00:38:13,200 --> 00:38:14,600
Speaker 2: things that are not that important.

858
00:38:15,400 --> 00:38:18,759
Speaker 6: Yeah, you nailed that one thousand percent. I mean I

859
00:38:18,840 --> 00:38:21,000
Speaker 6: was just thinking the same thing, like, what other people

860
00:38:21,080 --> 00:38:22,040
Speaker 6: think of you is.

861
00:38:22,200 --> 00:38:23,080
Speaker 1: Not your business.

862
00:38:23,719 --> 00:38:27,160
Speaker 6: And it can be hard, of course to you know,

863
00:38:27,160 --> 00:38:29,520
Speaker 6: you hear something gossipy and negative.

864
00:38:29,760 --> 00:38:31,600
Speaker 1: It sounds it's a high.

865
00:38:31,440 --> 00:38:33,440
Speaker 6: School thing, you know, it's that thing that you would

866
00:38:34,280 --> 00:38:36,600
Speaker 6: let can you latch on to when you were when

867
00:38:36,640 --> 00:38:39,600
Speaker 6: you were younger, And it can be hard to you know,

868
00:38:39,640 --> 00:38:41,960
Speaker 6: if you hear somebody saying something about about you. But

869
00:38:42,000 --> 00:38:44,680
Speaker 6: as you said, she wasn't meant to hear it. It

870
00:38:44,880 --> 00:38:48,680
Speaker 6: was ultimately a positive. And didn't she say, like, I'm

871
00:38:48,719 --> 00:38:50,880
Speaker 6: not even sure she was talking about me. Let's just

872
00:38:51,239 --> 00:38:53,200
Speaker 6: pretend she wasn't even talking about you, it wasn't even

873
00:38:53,200 --> 00:38:56,160
Speaker 6: about you. Just pretend that you didn't even hear because

874
00:38:56,160 --> 00:38:57,759
Speaker 6: it wasn't even about you. It could have been about

875
00:38:57,800 --> 00:39:00,439
Speaker 6: somebody else. You don't know for sure, that's true.

876
00:39:00,480 --> 00:39:04,960
Speaker 2: Also, Yeah, So just work on your stuff, work on it.

877
00:39:05,280 --> 00:39:07,920
Speaker 2: We all have a responsibility to each other as women

878
00:39:07,960 --> 00:39:10,719
Speaker 2: and as human beings to get better at being ourselves.

879
00:39:10,760 --> 00:39:12,880
Speaker 2: We all have a responsibility to kind of improve our

880
00:39:12,920 --> 00:39:16,440
Speaker 2: own mental health and our own mental self assuredness. Our

881
00:39:16,480 --> 00:39:19,880
Speaker 2: self assuredness is like, you have to be aware of

882
00:39:19,920 --> 00:39:23,319
Speaker 2: your behavior and then oh, oh, look at what I

883
00:39:23,360 --> 00:39:28,000
Speaker 2: got hurt about. Oh that's me being silly or insecure

884
00:39:28,160 --> 00:39:31,360
Speaker 2: or small. Never mind, wipe that away like it's like

885
00:39:31,440 --> 00:39:34,160
Speaker 2: water off a duck's back. Let it fall off of you,

886
00:39:34,280 --> 00:39:37,360
Speaker 2: and actually physically think about those comments falling off of you,

887
00:39:37,760 --> 00:39:40,200
Speaker 2: because that's something that I do a lot, and it works.

888
00:39:40,760 --> 00:39:43,319
Speaker 2: You just think about the fact that, Okay, I've set

889
00:39:43,360 --> 00:39:45,719
Speaker 2: with this emotion. It didn't feel nice, and now I'm

890
00:39:45,760 --> 00:39:46,799
Speaker 2: letting it go and moving on.

891
00:39:47,160 --> 00:39:47,520
Speaker 1: That's good.

892
00:39:47,520 --> 00:39:49,879
Speaker 6: I like that envisioning the water off a ducts back.

893
00:39:50,040 --> 00:39:54,120
Speaker 3: Mm hmmm hm. So Luke says dear Chelsea.

894
00:39:54,480 --> 00:39:56,759
Speaker 4: I'm a thirty four year old single gay man, and

895
00:39:56,800 --> 00:39:59,320
Speaker 4: life has been equal parts horrible and generous to me.

896
00:40:00,040 --> 00:40:02,560
Speaker 4: I met my husband online when I was seventeen, he

897
00:40:02,640 --> 00:40:05,480
Speaker 4: was eighteen. There wasn't a weird age gap. Even talking

898
00:40:05,520 --> 00:40:07,680
Speaker 4: about it now, I want to pull younger me aside

899
00:40:07,760 --> 00:40:09,880
Speaker 4: and say Oh, honey, you have so much time to

900
00:40:09,920 --> 00:40:10,480
Speaker 4: fall in love.

901
00:40:10,640 --> 00:40:11,400
Speaker 3: Don't rush it.

902
00:40:12,080 --> 00:40:14,399
Speaker 4: Well, we rushed it, and I rebelled against every piece

903
00:40:14,400 --> 00:40:16,840
Speaker 4: of guidance my family had to offer. We got married

904
00:40:16,840 --> 00:40:19,840
Speaker 4: and never looked back. We both ended up being successful

905
00:40:19,880 --> 00:40:22,239
Speaker 4: in our careers and build a great life together. And

906
00:40:22,280 --> 00:40:25,440
Speaker 4: then he died in a car accident. I was and

907
00:40:25,480 --> 00:40:28,640
Speaker 4: still am, completely devastated. And this was four years ago.

908
00:40:28,960 --> 00:40:31,000
Speaker 4: Three months after he died, I learned that I was

909
00:40:31,040 --> 00:40:34,240
Speaker 4: the sole beneficiary of a one million dollar life insurance policy.

910
00:40:34,840 --> 00:40:37,160
Speaker 4: That policy has since paid out, and I donated a

911
00:40:37,200 --> 00:40:39,680
Speaker 4: large chunk of that to charities that I know he loved.

912
00:40:39,840 --> 00:40:40,920
Speaker 3: The rest I invested.

913
00:40:41,520 --> 00:40:43,600
Speaker 4: As you can imagine, his family is coming out of

914
00:40:43,600 --> 00:40:46,120
Speaker 4: the woodwork with their handout, and my inclination is to

915
00:40:46,160 --> 00:40:47,800
Speaker 4: tell them to fuck off entirely.

916
00:40:48,120 --> 00:40:52,680
Speaker 3: What are your thoughts? Thank you, Luke. This is tricky.

917
00:40:52,920 --> 00:40:53,600
Speaker 3: This is tricky.

918
00:40:54,200 --> 00:40:57,680
Speaker 2: I mean, I don't think it's fair to have to

919
00:40:57,719 --> 00:41:01,120
Speaker 2: give handouts to everybody, and his family if those were

920
00:41:01,160 --> 00:41:04,040
Speaker 2: his wishes. Yeah, is it the insurance policy or was

921
00:41:04,080 --> 00:41:05,480
Speaker 2: it an insurance policy?

922
00:41:05,520 --> 00:41:05,640
Speaker 6: Oh?

923
00:41:05,719 --> 00:41:07,480
Speaker 1: I see, so that is a little bit different. What

924
00:41:07,520 --> 00:41:08,520
Speaker 1: do you think about this?

925
00:41:08,640 --> 00:41:17,640
Speaker 6: An insurance policy is a very deliberate, very calculated situation,

926
00:41:18,600 --> 00:41:21,400
Speaker 6: you know, like he set that up for him. It

927
00:41:21,480 --> 00:41:25,680
Speaker 6: wasn't This wasn't like a probate situation where he died

928
00:41:25,680 --> 00:41:27,560
Speaker 6: and left a bunch of money and it's like who does.

929
00:41:27,480 --> 00:41:27,920
Speaker 1: It go to?

930
00:41:28,040 --> 00:41:30,920
Speaker 6: Well, they were married, and the family's like what about me?

931
00:41:31,080 --> 00:41:34,640
Speaker 6: Where his family? This was a very deliberate situation. Obviously,

932
00:41:34,680 --> 00:41:37,440
Speaker 6: if it was a different type of inheritance, that maybe

933
00:41:37,600 --> 00:41:40,200
Speaker 6: is a little bit more disputable. But I feel like

934
00:41:41,000 --> 00:41:43,680
Speaker 6: life insurance policy is just very specific.

935
00:41:43,440 --> 00:41:46,560
Speaker 4: Right right, And I think my big question is what

936
00:41:46,640 --> 00:41:49,719
Speaker 4: kind of relationship did you have with them before this?

937
00:41:49,920 --> 00:41:52,120
Speaker 3: You know, did you have a good relationship with them?

938
00:41:52,280 --> 00:41:55,000
Speaker 4: Were they people that you saw it Thanksgiving and holidays

939
00:41:55,000 --> 00:41:57,800
Speaker 4: and this sort of thing, or are you just hearing

940
00:41:57,840 --> 00:41:59,960
Speaker 4: from them now. I think that makes a big difference

941
00:42:00,080 --> 00:42:01,239
Speaker 4: and sort of the answers to that.

942
00:42:01,400 --> 00:42:04,160
Speaker 2: Yeah, But it's also not your responsibility to be doling

943
00:42:04,200 --> 00:42:06,360
Speaker 2: out like you know, we're talking about a million dollars,

944
00:42:06,360 --> 00:42:08,960
Speaker 2: and while that may sound like a lot of money,

945
00:42:09,320 --> 00:42:11,760
Speaker 2: that goes very quickly, you know when you start giving

946
00:42:11,800 --> 00:42:14,640
Speaker 2: it away to different people, And as you just said,

947
00:42:14,800 --> 00:42:16,879
Speaker 2: and insurance policy is not set up for your other

948
00:42:17,400 --> 00:42:20,080
Speaker 2: family members like your brothers and your sisters.

949
00:42:20,280 --> 00:42:23,200
Speaker 1: It's set up for your partner. That's what it is, right.

950
00:42:23,120 --> 00:42:26,279
Speaker 6: And that's that coming from his bank account. It's not

951
00:42:26,320 --> 00:42:28,120
Speaker 6: like it's not like this is his money. He worked

952
00:42:28,160 --> 00:42:30,880
Speaker 6: for his whole life and he's leaving it all to

953
00:42:31,000 --> 00:42:33,719
Speaker 6: him like this is insurance money, right.

954
00:42:34,239 --> 00:42:36,319
Speaker 2: I don't know if you're feeling really guilty that you

955
00:42:36,360 --> 00:42:39,120
Speaker 2: want to give them money, that's that's really a personal decision.

956
00:42:39,200 --> 00:42:41,719
Speaker 1: I don't think you have any obligation to do that.

957
00:42:42,400 --> 00:42:46,120
Speaker 2: And yes, are you in regular communication with these people,

958
00:42:46,200 --> 00:42:47,600
Speaker 2: or if they came out of nowhere, if they came

959
00:42:47,640 --> 00:42:49,440
Speaker 2: out of nowhere, or you hadn't heard from them for

960
00:42:49,440 --> 00:42:52,080
Speaker 2: a while, one more reason to not worry about it.

961
00:42:52,320 --> 00:42:54,799
Speaker 2: But I wouldn't let yourself be racked with guilt. You

962
00:42:54,840 --> 00:42:57,040
Speaker 2: were in that relationship for a really long time, and

963
00:42:57,160 --> 00:43:00,160
Speaker 2: I believe that you deserve that insurance policy.

964
00:43:01,040 --> 00:43:04,359
Speaker 6: And I will say that you are not alone in this.

965
00:43:04,360 --> 00:43:09,000
Speaker 6: This is so common and is almost a little bit

966
00:43:09,080 --> 00:43:12,799
Speaker 6: more the norm when somebody passes away and there's you know,

967
00:43:12,840 --> 00:43:15,680
Speaker 6: whether there's a step situation and exes and all this

968
00:43:15,719 --> 00:43:20,040
Speaker 6: stuff and children involved that it usually can be very

969
00:43:20,080 --> 00:43:23,719
Speaker 6: messy and it usually can create so many problems. I

970
00:43:23,800 --> 00:43:26,560
Speaker 6: was so fortunate that we had none of that, thank god.

971
00:43:27,000 --> 00:43:30,680
Speaker 6: But that's not the norm my situation. We talk all

972
00:43:30,680 --> 00:43:32,759
Speaker 6: the time. We're always like, we are so lucky that

973
00:43:32,840 --> 00:43:36,200
Speaker 6: we didn't have that type of because a lot of times,

974
00:43:36,239 --> 00:43:39,840
Speaker 6: just somebody passes away, it is just a catalyst for

975
00:43:40,880 --> 00:43:42,120
Speaker 6: your worst self.

976
00:43:41,880 --> 00:43:43,359
Speaker 1: To come from. Yeah. Absolutely.

977
00:43:43,520 --> 00:43:45,680
Speaker 2: I mean I was just with a friend on vacation

978
00:43:45,760 --> 00:43:48,240
Speaker 2: who was dealing with this and I could not believe

979
00:43:48,280 --> 00:43:50,600
Speaker 2: the stories. I was just like, oh my god, money

980
00:43:50,600 --> 00:43:52,239
Speaker 2: brings out the worst in everybody.

981
00:43:52,640 --> 00:43:55,400
Speaker 4: My family is all in elder law and estate planning,

982
00:43:55,480 --> 00:43:57,879
Speaker 4: So like, everybody, go get your estate plan done because

983
00:43:57,920 --> 00:44:00,239
Speaker 4: that you know, when you do pass, you can make

984
00:44:00,280 --> 00:44:03,319
Speaker 4: these choices before any of that happens. You can say

985
00:44:03,360 --> 00:44:05,800
Speaker 4: how you want things to go and nobody has to

986
00:44:05,880 --> 00:44:06,360
Speaker 4: argue about it.

987
00:44:06,440 --> 00:44:07,680
Speaker 1: Yeah, I've done my estate planning.

988
00:44:07,719 --> 00:44:09,400
Speaker 2: I just re up to my estate planning and make

989
00:44:09,400 --> 00:44:11,760
Speaker 2: sure that my cousin doesn't get to make medical decisions

990
00:44:11,760 --> 00:44:14,360
Speaker 2: in my favor because she'll keep me alive no matter what.

991
00:44:14,520 --> 00:44:16,400
Speaker 2: And I was like, listen, bitch, I have another cousin

992
00:44:16,440 --> 00:44:19,120
Speaker 2: that will euthanize me. And so he's gonna be the

993
00:44:19,120 --> 00:44:21,640
Speaker 2: one that has the medical decision making.

994
00:44:21,800 --> 00:44:24,280
Speaker 1: I don't want to fight anything. I'm ready. I'm ready

995
00:44:24,320 --> 00:44:25,480
Speaker 1: to go if need.

996
00:44:25,360 --> 00:44:27,080
Speaker 3: Be all right.

997
00:44:27,160 --> 00:44:29,200
Speaker 4: And you know, one other thing that Luke brought up

998
00:44:29,200 --> 00:44:31,560
Speaker 4: when we did sort of a pre interview call was

999
00:44:32,239 --> 00:44:37,239
Speaker 4: being a very young widower is something very unique or

1000
00:44:37,320 --> 00:44:38,440
Speaker 4: is uncommon?

1001
00:44:38,440 --> 00:44:40,239
Speaker 3: Would you have any words of advice for him?

1002
00:44:41,120 --> 00:44:46,120
Speaker 6: Yeah, just knowing that you feel like when it happens

1003
00:44:46,160 --> 00:44:49,279
Speaker 6: to you that you're the only one because you're like,

1004
00:44:49,400 --> 00:44:53,000
Speaker 6: oh my god, I was not planning this. I was

1005
00:44:53,040 --> 00:44:56,440
Speaker 6: anticipating that. I mean, in my situation, I knew that

1006
00:44:56,520 --> 00:45:01,359
Speaker 6: I'd probably be a widow maybe in my sixties or seventies,

1007
00:45:01,400 --> 00:45:04,520
Speaker 6: but I certainly wasn't anticipating it at forty two when

1008
00:45:04,560 --> 00:45:08,479
Speaker 6: it was three years ago. And I will say, when

1009
00:45:09,000 --> 00:45:12,919
Speaker 6: you go through it, you start like so many people

1010
00:45:12,960 --> 00:45:14,640
Speaker 6: start to come out of the woodworks, and you do

1011
00:45:14,760 --> 00:45:18,720
Speaker 6: have such a support group of people that you meet

1012
00:45:18,920 --> 00:45:21,960
Speaker 6: who they're like, i'm a young widow too, or I'm

1013
00:45:21,960 --> 00:45:24,200
Speaker 6: a young widower also, and I've met so many people

1014
00:45:24,200 --> 00:45:26,680
Speaker 6: who have and then you feel less alone and it

1015
00:45:26,719 --> 00:45:28,760
Speaker 6: sounds like this was four years ago.

1016
00:45:28,880 --> 00:45:31,000
Speaker 1: So it's really tough.

1017
00:45:31,400 --> 00:45:34,479
Speaker 6: But if he can find that support from other people

1018
00:45:34,520 --> 00:45:36,520
Speaker 6: who have gone through it at a similar age. You

1019
00:45:36,600 --> 00:45:38,840
Speaker 6: do feel alone, but you're not alone. There are so

1020
00:45:38,920 --> 00:45:39,799
Speaker 6: many people.

1021
00:45:39,560 --> 00:45:42,680
Speaker 2: And it's really important not to let people put guilt

1022
00:45:42,760 --> 00:45:45,520
Speaker 2: on you. I know you might feel that like that's

1023
00:45:45,520 --> 00:45:49,439
Speaker 2: a natural reaction to them coming and saying we want

1024
00:45:49,480 --> 00:45:50,120
Speaker 2: money to.

1025
00:45:50,440 --> 00:45:53,880
Speaker 1: Or whatever they're doing. You can't let people guilt you

1026
00:45:53,920 --> 00:45:54,600
Speaker 1: into things.

1027
00:45:54,840 --> 00:45:56,840
Speaker 2: You have to kind of really sit with this decision

1028
00:45:56,920 --> 00:45:59,560
Speaker 2: and think about what's right for you and what's appropriate

1029
00:45:59,640 --> 00:46:03,480
Speaker 2: for you, and that is appropriate insurance policy is for

1030
00:46:03,560 --> 00:46:04,040
Speaker 2: the partner.

1031
00:46:04,120 --> 00:46:04,920
Speaker 1: That's appropriate.

1032
00:46:05,200 --> 00:46:08,719
Speaker 2: So anything other complicated feelings you have around it have

1033
00:46:08,840 --> 00:46:11,719
Speaker 2: been brought on by his family, and so I want

1034
00:46:11,719 --> 00:46:13,520
Speaker 2: you to be very aware of that and where the

1035
00:46:13,560 --> 00:46:15,160
Speaker 2: feelings of guilt are coming from.

1036
00:46:15,640 --> 00:46:19,480
Speaker 6: Yes, you've done absolutely nothing wrong. It's hard enough to

1037
00:46:19,520 --> 00:46:21,440
Speaker 6: go through the loss of the partner without all of

1038
00:46:21,480 --> 00:46:24,920
Speaker 6: this other stuff and a lot of people who aren't

1039
00:46:24,960 --> 00:46:27,799
Speaker 6: in your shoes and who haven't experienced a loss of

1040
00:46:27,800 --> 00:46:31,000
Speaker 6: a spouse and how absolutely gut wrenching it is. It

1041
00:46:31,160 --> 00:46:33,760
Speaker 6: just goes back to the hole. When someone is grieving,

1042
00:46:34,640 --> 00:46:36,840
Speaker 6: there's no wrong way to do it. You can't judge

1043
00:46:36,840 --> 00:46:39,879
Speaker 6: them because if you haven't been through it. You don't

1044
00:46:39,920 --> 00:46:40,480
Speaker 6: know what it's like.

1045
00:46:41,040 --> 00:46:43,879
Speaker 4: Yeah, all right, Luke, check back in with us, keep

1046
00:46:43,920 --> 00:46:46,759
Speaker 4: us posted, and we can take a quick break and

1047
00:46:47,120 --> 00:46:49,440
Speaker 4: come back with a kind of silly little question to

1048
00:46:49,440 --> 00:46:49,799
Speaker 4: wrap up.

1049
00:46:49,800 --> 00:46:50,080
Speaker 1: Perfect.

1050
00:46:50,160 --> 00:46:52,960
Speaker 2: Let's go, Let's let's end on something light today. It's

1051
00:46:53,000 --> 00:46:55,560
Speaker 2: been a bit heavier. Okay, we're gonna take a break up.

1052
00:46:55,560 --> 00:47:02,520
Speaker 2: We'll be right back with Kelly Rizzo. And we're back.

1053
00:47:03,120 --> 00:47:04,200
Speaker 1: We are back.

1054
00:47:04,760 --> 00:47:05,120
Speaker 5: Well.

1055
00:47:05,680 --> 00:47:09,399
Speaker 4: I identify with Cindy here because, you know, being a Midwestern kid,

1056
00:47:09,400 --> 00:47:11,760
Speaker 4: as I know you are, Kelly, you know our families

1057
00:47:11,760 --> 00:47:13,480
Speaker 4: are a little more conservative when it comes to what

1058
00:47:13,520 --> 00:47:17,720
Speaker 4: we do with our body modification. So Cindy says, Dear Chelsea.

1059
00:47:18,239 --> 00:47:20,600
Speaker 4: I'm in my thirties and recently got a little lip

1060
00:47:20,600 --> 00:47:24,360
Speaker 4: filler for the first time. I'm happy with the results,

1061
00:47:24,400 --> 00:47:27,719
Speaker 4: but I find myself constantly afraid of being judged by

1062
00:47:27,760 --> 00:47:30,799
Speaker 4: my friends and coworkers. I also live far away from

1063
00:47:30,800 --> 00:47:34,400
Speaker 4: my parents, and I'm dreading their reaction. They screamed at

1064
00:47:34,440 --> 00:47:36,560
Speaker 4: my sister when she got her nose pierced, so they

1065
00:47:36,600 --> 00:47:39,880
Speaker 4: definitely don't like body modifications. My fear is that my

1066
00:47:39,920 --> 00:47:42,360
Speaker 4: parents will be disappointed in me for changing the features

1067
00:47:42,360 --> 00:47:44,600
Speaker 4: they gave me, and I don't want to break their hearts.

1068
00:47:45,160 --> 00:47:47,080
Speaker 4: Do you think I should give my parents a heads

1069
00:47:47,160 --> 00:47:49,520
Speaker 4: up about the filler or should I just act normal

1070
00:47:49,560 --> 00:47:51,759
Speaker 4: and not say anything when I finally see them. Thanks

1071
00:47:51,800 --> 00:47:53,520
Speaker 4: so much for your advice, Cindy.

1072
00:47:54,200 --> 00:47:55,840
Speaker 2: I definitely don't think you should give the heads up

1073
00:47:55,880 --> 00:47:58,360
Speaker 2: to anyone about anything, Like it's really not their fucking

1074
00:47:58,400 --> 00:48:01,880
Speaker 2: problem or their business. And if it's noticeable enough, like

1075
00:48:01,920 --> 00:48:04,440
Speaker 2: if it's a big change from how you looked before,

1076
00:48:05,160 --> 00:48:07,759
Speaker 2: then I think you should go in there with like

1077
00:48:07,840 --> 00:48:10,520
Speaker 2: a plan about why you did it, explaining to them

1078
00:48:10,560 --> 00:48:12,200
Speaker 2: that it was important for you and that this has

1079
00:48:12,239 --> 00:48:14,880
Speaker 2: been something you've felt insecure about and that you've seen

1080
00:48:15,040 --> 00:48:15,759
Speaker 2: everybody else.

1081
00:48:15,880 --> 00:48:18,799
Speaker 1: Everybody fucking does this. Everybody does it.

1082
00:48:18,840 --> 00:48:21,920
Speaker 2: I've done it, Like it's okay, it doesn't matter, Like

1083
00:48:22,360 --> 00:48:24,120
Speaker 2: whatever's going to make you feel better. First of all,

1084
00:48:24,120 --> 00:48:26,040
Speaker 2: your lips get thinner as you get older, so like

1085
00:48:26,200 --> 00:48:29,640
Speaker 2: there's that a men's get thicker as they get older.

1086
00:48:30,480 --> 00:48:31,400
Speaker 1: How that happens?

1087
00:48:31,440 --> 00:48:34,880
Speaker 2: It's like, but also like whatever you need to do

1088
00:48:34,960 --> 00:48:36,920
Speaker 2: to make yourself feel better, who gives a shit? Like

1089
00:48:36,960 --> 00:48:39,000
Speaker 2: you don't owe them an explanation, And if they if

1090
00:48:39,040 --> 00:48:42,160
Speaker 2: it's not noticeable enough. They probably won't even fucking notice.

1091
00:48:42,239 --> 00:48:44,640
Speaker 2: So I don't know how much you got done. But

1092
00:48:45,080 --> 00:48:49,080
Speaker 2: like everyone is doing this and it's that's it. You

1093
00:48:49,160 --> 00:48:51,399
Speaker 2: always wanted bigger lips. That's all you have to say

1094
00:48:51,560 --> 00:48:53,560
Speaker 2: is I wish I had bigger lips. I've always wanted

1095
00:48:53,560 --> 00:48:55,560
Speaker 2: bigger lips. Can you believe how lucky I am that

1096
00:48:55,600 --> 00:48:58,160
Speaker 2: they provide this and you could just go and get

1097
00:48:58,160 --> 00:49:00,839
Speaker 2: it done. It didn't have to get so, I didn't

1098
00:49:00,880 --> 00:49:02,239
Speaker 2: have to go under the knife. I didn't have to

1099
00:49:02,280 --> 00:49:04,520
Speaker 2: do anything drastic. I just got a little lip injector

1100
00:49:04,680 --> 00:49:06,239
Speaker 2: that will dissolve if I don't like it.

1101
00:49:06,320 --> 00:49:07,960
Speaker 1: I mean, life is a miracle.

1102
00:49:09,120 --> 00:49:13,600
Speaker 6: Yeah, I mean, I'm with you completely, and that you're

1103
00:49:13,640 --> 00:49:19,280
Speaker 6: an adult, you're in your thirties. I understand the still

1104
00:49:19,280 --> 00:49:23,000
Speaker 6: appreciation for what your parents think. But it's one thing

1105
00:49:23,000 --> 00:49:24,400
Speaker 6: if you were like in high school and they're like,

1106
00:49:24,440 --> 00:49:26,520
Speaker 6: I'm not gonna pay for college if you do this, okay,

1107
00:49:26,520 --> 00:49:28,319
Speaker 6: it's like you're kind of still under their thumb, like

1108
00:49:28,360 --> 00:49:30,359
Speaker 6: they can't just go out and do that.

1109
00:49:30,719 --> 00:49:32,480
Speaker 1: However, I mean I.

1110
00:49:32,440 --> 00:49:35,840
Speaker 6: Come from a very different like my mom lived in

1111
00:49:35,880 --> 00:49:38,360
Speaker 6: the Playboy mansion in the sixties, when I had like

1112
00:49:38,400 --> 00:49:40,200
Speaker 6: my nose done in my boobs on, she was like,

1113
00:49:40,480 --> 00:49:43,400
Speaker 6: you go girl, Like she loved all that stuff. But

1114
00:49:43,440 --> 00:49:45,360
Speaker 6: then again, like they hated all the tattoos. I have

1115
00:49:45,400 --> 00:49:47,399
Speaker 6: so many tattoos. And my dad is you know, born

1116
00:49:47,440 --> 00:49:51,040
Speaker 6: in Sicily, very old school Sicilian, and he's would freak

1117
00:49:51,080 --> 00:49:54,080
Speaker 6: out about them. But I still just didn't care. I'm like,

1118
00:49:54,160 --> 00:49:56,680
Speaker 6: they're still gonna love me no matter what. They're not

1119
00:49:56,719 --> 00:50:00,759
Speaker 6: gonna disown me, and they get over it.

1120
00:50:00,800 --> 00:50:01,680
Speaker 1: They get over it.

1121
00:50:01,800 --> 00:50:03,560
Speaker 6: Yeah, they might be mad for a few minutes and

1122
00:50:03,560 --> 00:50:06,040
Speaker 6: well like why'd you do that? Five minutes later, they're

1123
00:50:06,120 --> 00:50:08,920
Speaker 6: not going to care. So just you're building this up

1124
00:50:08,960 --> 00:50:11,200
Speaker 6: too much. Yeah, they'll get over it.

1125
00:50:11,360 --> 00:50:14,359
Speaker 4: Yeah, And it's the way you feel, isn't silly. That's

1126
00:50:14,360 --> 00:50:15,719
Speaker 4: not what I'm trying to say by this is a

1127
00:50:15,760 --> 00:50:18,680
Speaker 4: silly question. But if this gives you confidence, that's the

1128
00:50:18,680 --> 00:50:20,799
Speaker 4: thing that matters. And I do think that's true. Like

1129
00:50:20,920 --> 00:50:23,680
Speaker 4: parents sometimes are like weird about something like a nose ring,

1130
00:50:23,760 --> 00:50:26,239
Speaker 4: but like not about hey, your lips look a little

1131
00:50:26,239 --> 00:50:27,080
Speaker 4: bit different.

1132
00:50:26,880 --> 00:50:28,919
Speaker 2: But also just come from a place of like when

1133
00:50:28,920 --> 00:50:32,480
Speaker 2: you do deal with it, your enthusiasm has to override

1134
00:50:32,560 --> 00:50:37,480
Speaker 2: their criticism, Like I'm so happy I did this. Thank goodness,

1135
00:50:37,560 --> 00:50:40,080
Speaker 2: this service is available, Thank god I can afford it.

1136
00:50:40,320 --> 00:50:42,719
Speaker 2: You can just pop into someone's office and do this, like,

1137
00:50:42,760 --> 00:50:45,400
Speaker 2: oh my god, I'm so grateful. Like you have to

1138
00:50:45,480 --> 00:50:49,600
Speaker 2: overshadow their pessimism or negativity and with the fact that

1139
00:50:49,600 --> 00:50:51,560
Speaker 2: their daughter's happy that you made that choice.

1140
00:50:51,800 --> 00:50:52,160
Speaker 3: Yeah.

1141
00:50:52,560 --> 00:50:54,680
Speaker 6: Yeah, Like I feel good about myself. And if you

1142
00:50:54,680 --> 00:50:56,040
Speaker 6: want to be mad at me, be mad at me.

1143
00:50:56,120 --> 00:50:58,640
Speaker 6: But I'm sure you'll get over it. And yeah, we'll

1144
00:50:58,680 --> 00:50:59,880
Speaker 6: have a wonderful holidays.

1145
00:51:00,320 --> 00:51:01,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, exactly.

1146
00:51:01,680 --> 00:51:03,640
Speaker 1: Cut to I want to see it before and after picture.

1147
00:51:05,600 --> 00:51:07,359
Speaker 3: Please send that Cindy you.

1148
00:51:07,520 --> 00:51:09,800
Speaker 1: Okay, So, Kelly, thank you for coming today.

1149
00:51:09,840 --> 00:51:11,840
Speaker 2: So listen to people if you want to be in

1150
00:51:11,840 --> 00:51:15,160
Speaker 2: a support group for grief or you know, probably other

1151
00:51:15,200 --> 00:51:18,160
Speaker 2: things too. I imagine it will expand beyond just grief. Right,

1152
00:51:18,840 --> 00:51:19,480
Speaker 2: you can go.

1153
00:51:19,400 --> 00:51:21,760
Speaker 1: To comfort Club online dot com.

1154
00:51:21,560 --> 00:51:23,880
Speaker 2: Comfort Club online dot com, and then you can also

1155
00:51:23,920 --> 00:51:26,880
Speaker 2: tune into Kelly's podcast, which is comfort Food, which.

1156
00:51:26,719 --> 00:51:29,520
Speaker 1: Is available on anywhere you get podcasts.

1157
00:51:29,080 --> 00:51:32,040
Speaker 2: Which is also about grief and handling grief with a

1158
00:51:32,080 --> 00:51:36,160
Speaker 2: little bit more support and more comfort over food and

1159
00:51:36,239 --> 00:51:39,400
Speaker 2: actually using it as a guide to not even for yourself.

1160
00:51:39,440 --> 00:51:41,840
Speaker 2: If you're necessarily going through grief, but if for someone

1161
00:51:41,880 --> 00:51:44,080
Speaker 2: that you love is going through grief, figuring out a

1162
00:51:44,120 --> 00:51:46,759
Speaker 2: better way to be available for them exactly.

1163
00:51:46,880 --> 00:51:50,040
Speaker 6: And it's just really great advice for not only how

1164
00:51:50,080 --> 00:51:51,680
Speaker 6: to get through it yourself, but how to help people

1165
00:51:51,760 --> 00:51:54,319
Speaker 6: going through it in your life. Because if we haven't

1166
00:51:54,360 --> 00:51:57,200
Speaker 6: gone through it yet, someone we know has gone through

1167
00:51:57,200 --> 00:52:00,319
Speaker 6: it or is going through it. Yeah, thank you so

1168
00:52:00,360 --> 00:52:02,080
Speaker 6: much for thank you so much for having me. Yes,

1169
00:52:02,320 --> 00:52:05,560
Speaker 6: so lovely to see you. Yeah, always always. Okay, we'll

1170
00:52:05,600 --> 00:52:06,520
Speaker 6: see you guys next week.

1171
00:52:07,640 --> 00:52:10,000
Speaker 1: Okay, guys. Stand up shows that I have coming up.

1172
00:52:10,160 --> 00:52:13,799
Speaker 2: I am going to San Diego on eleven, twenty nine,

1173
00:52:13,880 --> 00:52:16,759
Speaker 2: that has tickets available. Oh, I'm coming to Vegas on

1174
00:52:16,800 --> 00:52:20,960
Speaker 2: November thirtieth, right after Thanksgiving and their tickets available for that.

1175
00:52:21,080 --> 00:52:23,680
Speaker 2: And then I'll be in Des Moines, Iowa December fifth.

1176
00:52:23,760 --> 00:52:28,640
Speaker 2: December sixth is Omaha, and then December twenty eighth, I'm

1177
00:52:28,640 --> 00:52:31,160
Speaker 2: coming in New Orleans right before New Year's and then

1178
00:52:31,160 --> 00:52:34,040
Speaker 2: I'll be in Atlanta, Georgia on December twenty ninth. And

1179
00:52:34,120 --> 00:52:36,040
Speaker 2: those are the rest of my stand up dates for

1180
00:52:36,080 --> 00:52:39,399
Speaker 2: this year. It's over New Tour New Year.

1181
00:52:40,320 --> 00:52:42,720
Speaker 4: If you'd like advice from Chelsea, shoot us an email

1182
00:52:42,760 --> 00:52:45,600
Speaker 4: at Dear Chelsea podcast at gmail dot com and be

1183
00:52:45,600 --> 00:52:48,680
Speaker 4: sure to include your phone number. Dear Chelsea is edited

1184
00:52:48,680 --> 00:52:52,319
Speaker 4: and engineered by Brad Dickard executive producer Catherine Law and

1185
00:52:52,400 --> 00:52:54,839
Speaker 4: be sure to check out our merch at Chelseahandler dot

1186
00:52:54,840 --> 00:52:57,640
Speaker 4: com