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Speaker 1: It's Brook and Jeffrey in the morning. And what do

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Speaker 1: you do if your significant other loves going to the

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Speaker 1: grocery store and doing self checkout but they're not very

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Speaker 1: good at it?

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Speaker 2: Got Wait, what do you mean?

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Speaker 1: We're nine times out of ten they need to call

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Speaker 1: an attendant over because they mess something up or double

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Speaker 1: scanned an item, or put their food in the wrong area.

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Speaker 2: No, you're laying it's not there.

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Speaker 1: Well, I'll tell you what you do. You call us

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Speaker 1: so we can pretend to be the grocery store and

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Speaker 1: reprimand him for his self checkout shortcomings. That's what we

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Speaker 1: do in your phone tap right now, it's another.

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Speaker 3: Hello. Hi, I'm calling from the Customer Experience department looking

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Speaker 3: for Brett.

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Speaker 4: This is Brett Great.

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Speaker 2: My name is Meredith Yanks. It's Mac. You Sandy, you

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Speaker 2: were in one of our stores recently.

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Speaker 4: Is this a survey?

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Speaker 2: No, it's actually.

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Speaker 3: About how you use our self checkout stations.

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Speaker 2: Okay, can you just tell me about that experience?

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Speaker 4: Uh? Overall was fine. I had one thing where the

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Speaker 4: attendant had to come over and help me scan the

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Speaker 4: avocados chopocounter didn't have a sticker on it, so I

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Speaker 4: had to get the number from the attendant, but.

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Speaker 2: Otherwise, okay.

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Speaker 3: So are you saying that you would appreciate it if

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Speaker 3: the farmers just put the barcodes right on as they

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Speaker 3: grow them in the fields.

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Speaker 2: No, just to convenience you.

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Speaker 4: I'm not saying that at all. I'm just telling you

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Speaker 4: about the issue I had because you asked, why are you.

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Speaker 2: Calling aggressive scanning? Brett? That's why I'm.

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Speaker 4: Calling aggressive scanning.

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Speaker 3: What one of the attendants noticed that you were aggressively

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Speaker 3: scanning your produce extra loudly, creating a real disturbance in

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Speaker 3: our store.

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Speaker 4: Disturbance that didn't happen.

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Speaker 2: Oh, it did happen.

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Speaker 3: It bothered our other customers greatly. How many times you

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Speaker 3: were scanning the bananas?

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Speaker 4: Why?

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Speaker 3: Just back and forth and back and forth and back

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Speaker 3: and forth, lady, I.

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Speaker 4: Was doing that because it wouldn't scan The attendant told

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Speaker 4: me to keep doing that.

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Speaker 2: Let me ask you a question, Brett.

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Speaker 3: You like to blame others for your shortcomings, don't you.

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Speaker 4: You work at a grocery store, and you're suggesting that

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Speaker 4: you don't even know me.

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Speaker 3: I don't work in a grocery store. At this point,

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Speaker 3: I am the grocery store and I'm just calling to

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Speaker 3: let you know that we have a problem with you.

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Speaker 4: You have a problem with me for doing what I'm

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Speaker 4: told to do at the self checkout. That's what you're

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Speaker 4: calling about.

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Speaker 3: What I'm calling to tell you is that from now on,

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Speaker 3: you'll have to stand in line at the regular checkout.

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Speaker 3: Oh come on, You're banned from all self checkouts for

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Speaker 3: six months.

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Speaker 4: Is this a joke?

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Speaker 2: No, it's not.

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Speaker 3: And I'll have you know my supervisor wanted me to

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Speaker 3: ban you from the store. I had to talk him down.

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Speaker 4: What is going on right now? I'm suspended from self

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Speaker 4: checkout because of my aggressive scanning.

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Speaker 2: That's right.

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Speaker 3: And I will say there is a way for you

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Speaker 3: to cut your suspension in half. You're always allowed to

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Speaker 3: take our free online course called beep Bag Breathe.

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Speaker 4: You know what this is dumb, I've had enough.

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Speaker 2: It's a way for people to get through self checkout calmly.

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Speaker 4: I am calm. I am perfectly calm when I'm doing

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Speaker 4: the self checkout. I literally was doing what your employee

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Speaker 4: told me to do.

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Speaker 2: This is crazy interesting.

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Speaker 3: Were you calm self check out the way you're being

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Speaker 3: calm with me right now?

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Speaker 4: No, I'm not calm with you right now because you're

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Speaker 4: provoking me. You're being extremely condescending and I didn't do

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Speaker 4: anything wrong.

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Speaker 2: But are you done?

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Speaker 4: Yeah? Are you done?

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Speaker 2: Am I done?

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Speaker 3: Trying to help you calmly bag your groceries without scaring

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Speaker 3: fellow shoppers.

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Speaker 2: Oh my gosh, I guess I am. I am done?

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Speaker 4: Okay, Well, I doubt you can stop me from using

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Speaker 4: self checkout. I mean, the reasons that you're giving are ridiculous.

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Speaker 4: I don't even know how you're going to enforce this.

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Speaker 3: Actually I can now if you do try to sneak back.

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Speaker 3: Our cameras have been trained to recognize something called wide

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Speaker 3: stance warriors.

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Speaker 4: What does that mean? What are you trying to say?

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Speaker 3: It's your signature move legs spread, arms flailing slightly as you.

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Speaker 2: Jab the scanner.

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Speaker 4: I'm not doing that.

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Speaker 3: Our AI video recognition will pick up on it and

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Speaker 3: you will be arrested.

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Speaker 4: You're trying to erect me for scanning my own freaking groceries.

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Speaker 2: We're not threatening you. We're rooting for you.

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Speaker 4: Bred fuck you can do this.

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Speaker 2: We hope you.

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Speaker 3: Take the necessary steps to get back in that line again,

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Speaker 3: as long as you can follow directions.

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Speaker 2: Beep bag breathe.

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Speaker 1: You don't have to.

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Speaker 4: Worry about that. I'm never gonna shop at your stupid

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Speaker 4: store again.

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Speaker 3: Oh well, that's funny, Brett, because I don't even work

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Speaker 3: at that stupid store.

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Speaker 2: Isn't that weird?

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Speaker 4: Oh no, yeah, I know you are the store. You

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Speaker 4: are the store that's really got complex.

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Speaker 2: Actually I'm not the story either.

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Speaker 3: I'm actually Brooke from the radio show Brooke and Jeffrey

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Speaker 3: in the Morning, and we're doing a prank phone call

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Speaker 3: on you.

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Speaker 4: You're not from the freaking grocery store.

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Speaker 2: Oh my, this is a phone tap. Your girlfriend, Ashley

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Speaker 2: set you up.

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Speaker 3: She said that it's hysterical to watch you try to

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Speaker 3: use self check out because you're terrible at it.

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Speaker 4: Come on, that's so low. That's so low.

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Speaker 3: Ah, you were worried about that wide leg stance.

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Speaker 2: I know that's you at that store.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, I mean that does sound like me, but that

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Speaker 4: beatback boot thing just set me off.

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Speaker 2: It's actually beat back breathe, Brett.

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Speaker 4: Deep back breathe, Yeah, beat back breathe. That's right.

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Speaker 2: Don't take it out on the produce.

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Speaker 4: You can't stop me.

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Speaker 2: Those poor banana

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Speaker 3: Wake up every morning was boom taps weekday mornings on

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Speaker 3: the twenties, Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning,