Speaker 1: So I went to the jingle Ball, and I brought
Speaker 1: my daughter and we were going to stay late and
Speaker 1: get to Olivia Rodrigo. And I loved Jelly Roll. Who
Speaker 1: knew I liked Jelly Roll. I loved his music. He
Speaker 1: was so cool two years before Caine Brown. Never heard
Speaker 1: of that guy until then, And so I like that,
Speaker 1: You know, I don't go to listen to music I
Speaker 1: art does it really well because you're at Madison Square Garden,
Speaker 1: which is not my cup of tea. Usually. I love
Speaker 1: Madison Square Garden and actually, to compliment them, I just
Speaker 1: went to the Pink concert and that was very civilized too.
Speaker 1: So I was going to say the idea of going
Speaker 1: to Madison Square Garden can be overwhelming because I don't
Speaker 1: love crowds and just get anxiety about that and getting
Speaker 1: in and getting out. And the jingle Ball every year
Speaker 1: is just so well run, which says a lot about iHeart.
Speaker 1: It says a lot about Madison Square Garden because it's
Speaker 1: just so pleasant. You feel safe, you don't feel chaotic,
Speaker 1: you feel like you can get access to things, you
Speaker 1: can get to places. It's just run really well. And
Speaker 1: it's the same people that do Radio City. Because I
Speaker 1: see the same security guys and I think it is
Speaker 1: or the same guys work at both places. But like
Speaker 1: it's just run well. So that's great. The jingle Ball
Speaker 1: is like a civilized concert, you know. And it's also
Speaker 1: great because you're not just listening to one artist the
Speaker 1: whole time. Like you could hear someone play four songs.
Speaker 1: You don't like them, you don't care, you're a little curious,
Speaker 1: you know one, so then you're on to the next thing.
Speaker 1: It's sort of like someone with a tension death is
Speaker 1: a disorders dream, like oh, okay, we did that. Now
Speaker 1: we're doing gangster rap, all right. Now we did country.
Speaker 1: Now we're doing gospel. Like it was very cool, and
Speaker 1: I always learned something and learn Oh, you know, I'm
Speaker 1: like the old person that's like, oh wait, that person's song.
Speaker 1: And it's every mom like I am. So I am
Speaker 1: the Justin Bieber of the jingle Ball because it's all
Speaker 1: the moms that have teens that you know, have the
Speaker 1: fanny packs and the big oversized coffee cups and the
Speaker 1: cross body and something blank out and like these are
Speaker 1: my people. So like I, you know, I'm very big
Speaker 1: at the jingle Ball, you know, And that gen pop
Speaker 1: you know area that we're in where everyone's just in
Speaker 1: rows and I was like, oh my god, the daughter
Speaker 1: watched me on TikTok. The mom loves my dollar store.
Speaker 1: I'm like, I'm you know, the mom's at CBS like
Speaker 1: quoting my reviews, like I'm just very big. I honestly
Speaker 1: I'll take Justin Bieber on any well, no I won't
Speaker 1: because I'll want the kids are there, but in my
Speaker 1: delusional mind, on the Justin Bieber of of the moms
Speaker 1: at the Jingle Ball. So I'm watching and I see
Speaker 1: Martha on stage, I see Andy Cohen up like not
Speaker 1: in the you know, and like the concert gets like diagonal,
Speaker 1: like I'm on the floor in the like the pit,
Speaker 1: and then like on the right, it's like a little
Speaker 1: like a couple of rows up. I see Andy Cohen
Speaker 1: in the distance in a flannel talking to some guys,
Speaker 1: just like drinking a beer, I think, And I uh,
Speaker 1: it's too soon for both of us, I'm sure, but
Speaker 1: it's like I know that we both have like fond
Speaker 1: memories and it's con fusing all around, and I'm sure
Speaker 1: it's confusing for him. Although it's I've been fairly clear
Speaker 1: and I've got no like personal vendetta against Andy Cohen
Speaker 1: by any means. He just kind of lives in and
Speaker 1: reflects this sort of world that got, in my opinion,
Speaker 1: a little out of control. So but I had like,
Speaker 1: you know, it's the holidays and feeling sentimental. There's no
Speaker 1: reason to like burn everything down to the grounds. Is no, Like,
Speaker 1: It's not like I don't find Andy very pleasant, very charming,
Speaker 1: very you know, amusing, and have like fond memories. I
Speaker 1: didn't go through like I'm delusional And in other nostalgic
Speaker 1: full circle news, Martha Stewart was there, which I talked about,
Speaker 1: but it was just crazy because she It's a big
Speaker 1: place in Madison Square Garden and she's sitting in my
Speaker 1: row way at the end. But I didn't think I
Speaker 1: knew that. I saw her up on stage and this
Speaker 1: woman Heather was like walking in front of us to
Speaker 1: get to her seats, and she said hi, and I
Speaker 1: said Ahi, I was nice, and she said do you
Speaker 1: want to come say hi to Martha. I was like, well,
Speaker 1: don't I ever? And I wanted to grab Brynn. It
Speaker 1: was like I wanted to grab Brint to like show
Speaker 1: Martha that I'm like a grown adult that like has
Speaker 1: a child just like her, like a daughter, a single
Speaker 1: you know, an only daughter. And Brinn was listening to
Speaker 1: the concert and I had a make up my makeup person, Jason,
Speaker 1: who's grade who I said, you should stay and go
Speaker 1: to the event, And this guy Kyle was with us,
Speaker 1: and I was a get the like, come you should
Speaker 1: probably this is something we should probably capture. I just
Speaker 1: had a feeling and I always go back to like
Speaker 1: you always go back to the way you were as
Speaker 1: a kid with your parent, or like someone used to
Speaker 1: work for. You could have a person who used to
Speaker 1: work four years ago as your boss and you now
Speaker 1: like own the company they work for, you'd still feel
Speaker 1: that same dynamic. And my dynamic with Martha, you know it,
Speaker 1: it changed in the last couple of years where I
Speaker 1: got more empowered, like we're you know, I'm on her level,
Speaker 1: which I don't really pretend to think that I am,
Speaker 1: only because she's a legend and she's been in this
Speaker 1: business for a really long long time. And I you know,
Speaker 1: and I don't mean this in any sort of shady way.
Speaker 1: I respect people that came before me, let's say it
Speaker 1: that way. So but she's undeniably a legend. I mean,
Speaker 1: she's she created the whole domestic movement. Like everything that
Speaker 1: every you know, Rachel Ray and Barfoot Contesta and every
Speaker 1: person after that, did Sandra Lee, all of it. It
Speaker 1: started with Martha. Well, I mean Julia Child's was a
Speaker 1: was a chef and was in the kitchen. But this
Speaker 1: is like a different story. So I'm like the hell
Speaker 1: I am, I always like reduced to who I used
Speaker 1: to be, where I was like, hey my dad, you know,
Speaker 1: and it's happened so many times, and I've been shut
Speaker 1: down so many times. You have no idea the crazy
Speaker 1: stories I have about Martha and I like the comments
Speaker 1: that she's made to me are insane, and like the
Speaker 1: comments that I've made back are insane. It's really been
Speaker 1: like this nemesis sort of friendly rivalry. Like she did
Speaker 1: say on Andy Cohen's show that she made a mistake
Speaker 1: and not hiring me. She acknowledges that, but she's still,
Speaker 1: you know, couldn't kind of stand me call she called
Speaker 1: me a pest on my own talk show. Like it
Speaker 1: was back and forth, but it was never like vicious.
Speaker 1: It was just sort of like healthy battle, you know,
Speaker 1: and for no good reason, but I'll never forget and
Speaker 1: I have so many stories, so if you guys like them,
Speaker 1: I'll tell more Martha stories. Remind me to tell you
Speaker 1: the story of Noboo Martha at Nobu on fifty seventh Street,
Speaker 1: because it's a crazy story. It's after like this piece
Speaker 1: came out about me when I was on The Apprentice
Speaker 1: and I had been topless in some shitty film years ago,
Speaker 1: like in a just bathing toples scene in the back.
Speaker 1: It wasn't like I was Trishia Petus like on OnlyFans.
Speaker 1: It was just like my saggy boobs or just laying topless.
Speaker 1: But anyway, it was an article on the back page
Speaker 1: of page six and it's called me Martha's a Porntis
Speaker 1: And I'll tell you the story later. But she chose
Speaker 1: to bring that up at Noboo, like it's so it
Speaker 1: was so pertinent to nothing that was going on. I
Speaker 1: hadn't seen her in months, and she just brought it
Speaker 1: up because it was a right random shot to fire.
Speaker 1: So and of course I was like, well, I just
Speaker 1: got an insider stock tip, Martha. Like so, because it's
Speaker 1: gonna cost me thirty five hundred dollars a story. If
Speaker 1: you guys like it plus tax. So I'm on The
Speaker 1: Apprentice Martha Stewart and I am the runner up. I
Speaker 1: don't win. Who cares if I thought I should want?
Speaker 1: It's a touching story. It doesn't matter what anyone thought.
Speaker 1: I didn't fucking win. It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter
Speaker 1: whether you bought your way onto the Forbes under thirty
Speaker 1: lifts or whether you bought your way onto the Hollywood
Speaker 1: Walk of Fame. Your fucking star is on there, so
Speaker 1: it doesn't matter. Okay. And if someone comes over here
Speaker 1: and says to me, hey, for free, I'll give you
Speaker 1: a big discount. We'll give you a star on the
Speaker 1: Walk of Fame. Here's my fucking check. If someone says
Speaker 1: you're gonna get on the met Gala and you can
Speaker 1: go there and wear dollar store makeup and land the
Speaker 1: fucking roll, where's the check? Where's your venmo, I'll send
Speaker 1: you the money right now. About the star Walk of Fame,
Speaker 1: it's about going to the Mechala, and it's about winning
Speaker 1: the Apprentice. Okay, So I didn't win, Who gives a
Speaker 1: good fuck? I came in second. Nobody cares how it happened.
Speaker 1: Nobody gives a shit who came in second the derby. Okay, great,
Speaker 1: I'm devastated I came in second. I thought I was
Speaker 1: gonna have the job. I wanted the job working for
Speaker 1: I wanted to democratize style like she did health. That
Speaker 1: was my big line. That's what I felt. I wanted
Speaker 1: to like be in there and be her number two
Speaker 1: and this whole thing. Incidentally, someone just quoted on Instagram
Speaker 1: something she said about in her masterclass, like if you
Speaker 1: see something in someone, you grab that person. And people
Speaker 1: were like, why didn't she grab you? And she didn't.
Speaker 1: Then she later said, I watch what Happens Live, she
Speaker 1: made a mistake, which I do not believe that Martha
Speaker 1: Stewart says often. So I've got that in my change purse.
Speaker 1: But I didn't win, and I was broke, and I
Speaker 1: was invited by a Lei Slaine, who was a housewife
Speaker 1: for a minute, to be her beard on a trip
Speaker 1: in Saint Bart's. But I didn't know that I was
Speaker 1: gonna be her beard. I didn't know what her story
Speaker 1: was in her marriage. I thought, I don't know she.
Speaker 1: I thought she was friends with this guy, she was
Speaker 1: dating him. It's not my business. I don't care. I
Speaker 1: just wish I had asked her to give me a
Speaker 1: check for being the Beard. I couldn't give a shit.
Speaker 1: What people do in their private life not my business.
Speaker 1: But I was invited by her to go to Saint Bart's.
Speaker 1: Let me remember, well we on a did she get
Speaker 1: the sky to fly us on a private plane? It
Speaker 1: might have been I don't remember. It might have been
Speaker 1: like rolling that deep. She's a big fucking game hunter.
Speaker 1: She had a rich husband. She dated this guy. She
Speaker 1: dated a guy who worked under Ron Perlman. She ended
Speaker 1: up getting an apartment out of that. She dated Howard Sobel,
Speaker 1: who's another big she did she dated. I think she
Speaker 1: flirted around with Donnie Deutsch but never dated him. She's
Speaker 1: a big game hunter, just not as good as Lauren Sanchez.
Speaker 1: Got to fucking respect it. Go a Lee Slang invited
Speaker 1: me at Saint Bart's. So they we go to Saint
Speaker 1: Bart's and I know that Martha's gonna be there. And
Speaker 1: I don't know why I know, but I know someone
Speaker 1: I know knows her. I know she's gonna be there. Oh,
Speaker 1: because I used to be friends with Paul Allen, the
Speaker 1: billionaire who founded Microsoft. May he rest in peace with
Speaker 1: Bill Gates liked Paul Allen, really smart guy. How I
Speaker 1: know him this is the ultimate fucking rant for the Holidays.
Speaker 1: How I know him is when I worked for Jerry Bruckheimer,
Speaker 1: the producer that his wife, Linda Bruckheimer, she was like
Speaker 1: another She was like an hbiic like me, like organizing
Speaker 1: everything from antiques to rubber bands. And I was her assistant.
Speaker 1: And Jerry Bruckheimer's her husband, and he produced Top Gun
Speaker 1: and Dais of Thunder and freaking a million movies you've
Speaker 1: heard of, like the Rock on Alcatraz, Connyer. He's a
Speaker 1: member of the Not Fucking Around crew. So I was
Speaker 1: working for them, and for the summer in Malibu, they
Speaker 1: needed someone to get their house that now would be
Speaker 1: worth fifty seventy five million. Then it was worth probably
Speaker 1: five to six million to get their house ready because
Speaker 1: they were renting it out too, either to Meg Tilly
Speaker 1: after Steve Tish or too Steve Tish after Meg Tilly.
Speaker 1: Meg Tilly's an actress. Steve Tish is a producer produced
Speaker 1: Forrest Gump, another fucking rich, rich, rich motherfucker. They owned
Speaker 1: the Giants, his brothers, John Tish. I could go on
Speaker 1: for days, so many fucking stories within this story, but
Speaker 1: enjoy and try to get a pen and paper and
Speaker 1: follow along. So I worked for the Bruckheimers and I
Speaker 1: had to get their spare house in Malibu. Yep, their
Speaker 1: spare house ready for these people. So the girl who
Speaker 1: was the main number one assistant, Carol, tasked me to come.
Speaker 1: And we were living on Carbon Canyon where Sebesta stallone
Speaker 1: was where all the rich people were. That's a plus
Speaker 1: fucking major major bag alert, like Larry Ellison. Uh, you know,
Speaker 1: multi billionaire has a house there. You cannot if you
Speaker 1: don't have a if you don't have a spare plane,
Speaker 1: you don't have a place on Carbon Canyon. So we
Speaker 1: were the babysitters of the house. So I would drive
Speaker 1: there my forged probe and David Geffen was our neighbor
Speaker 1: and he liked me, and he asked me to come
Speaker 1: to his house as dinner party to be Paul Allen
Speaker 1: to date because someone intelligent he thought I was intelligent
Speaker 1: could sit next to Paul Allen because there were a
Speaker 1: bunch of dum dums and a bunch of Hollywood types.
Speaker 1: So David Geffen was having Paul Allen, the founder of
Speaker 1: Microsoft over. I don't know who the fuck he was,
Speaker 1: so that's how I met him. So I knew Paul Allen.
Speaker 1: And I've always been the same way I am now,
Speaker 1: So even when I was broke, I always knew people
Speaker 1: because I was just always exactly the same. So I
Speaker 1: knew Paul Allen and Paul Allen while I was on
Speaker 1: the Apprentice towards the end, made the mistake of telling
Speaker 1: Martha that he knew me. Big mistake, huge, Julia Roberts,
Speaker 1: because that made me look like I was in a
Speaker 1: different level, Like I was sort of at Martha Stuart's level,
Speaker 1: and I needed Martha to think I was not at
Speaker 1: her level because we wanted her to hire me, Like
Speaker 1: I'm not interested in hiring people to work, you know,
Speaker 1: for me now that they're gonna be like, oh hey, yeah,
Speaker 1: I know Madonna too. It's just not what goes down.
Speaker 1: That was the first mistake, and I made another mistake
Speaker 1: with Martha. I had seen Bill Clinton at lunch at Barney's.
Speaker 1: That sounds really fucking relatable. Just coincidentally, I ran in
Speaker 1: to Bill Clinton and he was with his daughter Chelsea
Speaker 1: eating at Barney's, and I was eating because I was
Speaker 1: The live finale was at night, and I was with
Speaker 1: my friends who came in and flew in for the finale,
Speaker 1: and I was eating with them, and this is my
Speaker 1: hand to God, this is a true fucking story. It
Speaker 1: ended up in the post. Bill Clinton was there. We
Speaker 1: walk out at the same time. I walk up and
Speaker 1: I say like, oh, hi, tonight, I'm you know tonight,
Speaker 1: I'm I'm doing a live finale with Martha Stewart, like
Speaker 1: a big name drop. I needed something my hands to got.
Speaker 1: He had spinach in his tooth, and I told him,
Speaker 1: and he was with very light security and he took
Speaker 1: the spinach drop his tooth. It's the only interaction I've
Speaker 1: ever had with him. I interviewed his wife Hillary on
Speaker 1: this podcast, and you could if you ever ran into
Speaker 1: Bill Clinton, it probably would embarrass him. But it's so
Speaker 1: many years later. But he and Chelsea were having lunch.
Speaker 1: She was obviously much younger, she was a kid, And yes,
Speaker 1: he had spinach on his teeth, and he would remember
Speaker 1: that because he seems really fucking smart. I would not
Speaker 1: think that's what you would bring up to him, but
Speaker 1: that's what did happen. So lo and behold, that was
Speaker 1: the day my dumb fucking ass goes back to the
Speaker 1: finale that night and mentions to Martha that I ran
Speaker 1: into Bill Clinton, so I can be making this all up.
Speaker 1: I'll never bring it up again. But it's not that
Speaker 1: relatable for Martha Stewart to know that one of her
Speaker 1: contestants knows Bill Clinton and Paul Allen. And incidentally, in
Speaker 1: walking through the suite one day when I wasn't there
Speaker 1: for some reason, she commented on this Louis Vutant outfit
Speaker 1: that I had, that a man that I had dated
Speaker 1: had bought for me. So I don't think that I
Speaker 1: was that relatable and seem like I needed the job
Speaker 1: even though I was broken. I fucking needed the job.
Speaker 1: I digress. I don't get the job. I'm Elisee Slaine's beard,
Speaker 1: and I'm going to Saint Bart's and with her friend Matt,
Speaker 1: nice guy, and they have me staying in like not
Speaker 1: a real hotel room at the fancy rich Hotel La
Speaker 1: twenty in Saint Bart's, but like some sort of like
Speaker 1: person who owns or manages the hotels, like like staff cottage,
Speaker 1: but it was lovely. It was a cottage, but it's
Speaker 1: like a hotel it's very romantic. Way up in the mountains.
Speaker 1: You're kind of alone, and she's on a romantic vacation.
Speaker 1: I'm just the beard. So I don't really have transportation.
Speaker 1: I'm fucking around. I don't have anything going on, but
Speaker 1: I have one thing going on. Paul Allen has a boat,
Speaker 1: a yacht. His three boats. One is called the octopusy
Speaker 1: This one is three hundred feet at the time, and
Speaker 1: we're in St. Barts and I'm invited to his New
Speaker 1: Year's Eve party. Okay, we're getting to how it's gonna
Speaker 1: cost me thirty five hundred dollars this story. So he
Speaker 1: has a New Year's Eve party. I know because he
Speaker 1: told me. I believe that Martha was gonna be on
Speaker 1: that New Year's Eve party. Now I didn't win. So
Speaker 1: it's like Martha's the guy that just broke up with
Speaker 1: me that I want to run into and I'm gonna
Speaker 1: fucking look so hot and one thing I have, and
Speaker 1: Martha's beautiful and looks hot. Now like I was in
Speaker 1: my how old was I was young? I was you
Speaker 1: could wear things I wouldn't wear. Now I'm a mom,
Speaker 1: like you know, I wear fucking crossbody bags and shirp
Speaker 1: of fucking clogs, Like it's not the same. So Martha
Speaker 1: and Martha's a lot older. Martha then was my age.
Speaker 1: Martha was at Shirpa Clog wearing age, you know, cross
Speaker 1: body age. So Martha's gonna be on this boat. And
Speaker 1: I'm like, I'm gonna fucking wear the most fuck you
Speaker 1: outfit anyone who's ever seen in their life. I have
Speaker 1: a picture. We're gonna have to show it one day.
Speaker 1: I don't know how we show a picture on a podcast,
Speaker 1: but we'll have to figure that out. I have to
Speaker 1: teleport it to you, okay, because I will post you
Speaker 1: Guys will ask me the comments of like this was
Speaker 1: the fuck you dress? The number? I have two fuck
Speaker 1: you dresses. I've worn them both to the Victoria's Secret
Speaker 1: Fashion Show, the only place you can wear the biggest
Speaker 1: fuck you dress besides Vegas or on TikTok, but not me.
Speaker 1: So I'm like, I'm gonna bring the most fuck you dress.
Speaker 1: How did I afford adult Jakeabana fuck you dress? How
Speaker 1: waiting online for adult Jake Abana samples, getting it ninety
Speaker 1: percent off and clubbing someone over the head for it?
Speaker 1: So I wear my fucking doltcea Gabana laces all the
Speaker 1: way down both sides, and I don't mean like laces,
Speaker 1: like tight shoelaces, like there's a wide gap. It's a
Speaker 1: black satin dolt Jake Abana corset dress that hugs you
Speaker 1: and it's on your body, and it's got two giant
Speaker 1: gaps on both sides going all the way down with
Speaker 1: only laces like tying it all the way down. It
Speaker 1: is the ultimate countiest fuck you dress in history. Number one.
Speaker 1: I have another one. This one's more of the laces,
Speaker 1: the fucking allure of it, the mystery. I wear this
Speaker 1: onto that fucking boat that you have to take a
Speaker 1: boat to get to the boat. And I get on
Speaker 1: that boat and I don't know what I'm gonna say.
Speaker 1: It's the guy. It's the guy that broke up with you.
Speaker 1: What the fuck are you gonna say? You're gonna probably
Speaker 1: you have the biggest thing. You're gonna say. Someone's gonna
Speaker 1: be flirting with you. You don't know what you're gonna say,
Speaker 1: Just like when Charlotte on Sex and the City didn't
Speaker 1: know what she'd say if she saw a big and
Speaker 1: she's like, you'll rue the day he'll rue it who
Speaker 1: knows so, but she ended up running into him. What's
Speaker 1: her name was having a bait when oh, when she
Speaker 1: was going into labor, so she couldn't say anything great.
Speaker 1: So I get on the boat and it's the first
Speaker 1: person I see, likely because Martha and myself were people
Speaker 1: who would show up early, like we're showing up. We
Speaker 1: don't want to get our seat and we just like
Speaker 1: to know where we are. I get on the boat
Speaker 1: and I walk over and Martha is talking to John
Speaker 1: bon Jovi and to God, may I be burned at
Speaker 1: the stake right now and struck by lightning. This is
Speaker 1: not exactly what fucking happened. She's talking to John bon Jovi.
Speaker 1: I walk up to her and I say hi Martha,
Speaker 1: and she says to John bon Jovi, Oh, hi Bethany.
Speaker 1: She said, this is Bethany. She was just on my show,
Speaker 1: The Apprentice, but she's mad at me because she didn't win.
Speaker 1: This is days after the finale. What other contestant gets
Speaker 1: to run into the person who was like at the
Speaker 1: helm of this thing because there's someone's beard for a
Speaker 1: future housewife in St. Barts and is on their own
Speaker 1: alone oftion. So I and I have no like I'm nobody.
Speaker 1: I'm nothing, I've no money. I have this fucking dress.
Speaker 1: I clubb someone over the head for that's all that
Speaker 1: I have in this world. That's all that I'm clinging to,
Speaker 1: and it is clinging to me. And she says, she
Speaker 1: says that line about that. I'm you know, I didn't win,
Speaker 1: so I'm mad at her. And I say this line
Speaker 1: to Martha Stewart, Martha, I'm not mad at you. You're
Speaker 1: like an ex boyfriend that I hate but I'm still
Speaker 1: in love with. That was the microphone dropping, and that
Speaker 1: was it. That was all I had to do on
Speaker 1: the boat. I was on the boat. I met some people.
Speaker 1: I was insecure. I was alone. I was a loser.
Speaker 1: It wasn't as cool to be alone. I didn't have
Speaker 1: TikTok or my social media followers to talk to and
Speaker 1: pretend I was busy, just alone on a boat with
Speaker 1: billionaires on an island with no money to spend on it.
Speaker 1: That was it. Got off the boat, lived my life happily.
Speaker 1: Ever after ran into Martha. Maybe a couple of other times.
Speaker 1: This is gonna be a new series called Martha Stories.
Speaker 1: The next one would be me and Martha at Nobu
Speaker 1: and Malibu. There's another one of me and Martha at
Speaker 1: Bette Midler's Halloween party. And I have another one on
Speaker 1: the street with Jason and now I will tell you
Speaker 1: the final Martha's story. And I have another one when
Speaker 1: she came out of my talk show, which I give her.
Speaker 1: And I have another one when we were going to
Speaker 1: do a TV show together because Andy Cohen told Martha
Speaker 1: Stewart that the only way he wanted to do anything
Speaker 1: with her and produce something with her is if it
Speaker 1: was a show of the two of us together. So
Speaker 1: we went on that journey, and then most recently and
Speaker 1: then on my talk show, and then most recently at
Speaker 1: the jingle Ball, I walked up to Martha and I
Speaker 1: didn't have any kind of big plan, and I didn't
Speaker 1: feel scorned, and I didn't have anything to prove, and
Speaker 1: I feel like I am a whole, put together, well
Speaker 1: made Ikia cabinet. And I walked up to Martha and
Speaker 1: I sat down and I said, You're amazing. What you've
Speaker 1: been doing is unbelievable. I'm so impressed, I said, I
Speaker 1: kissed the proverbial ring. I said, I'm sorry for anything
Speaker 1: that has ever happened, full tail right between legs, don't
Speaker 1: even know what I'm sorry for, doesn't fucking matter. Meaning
Speaker 1: like we're both grown ass women who have nothing to
Speaker 1: prove in this life, and it was it just hit different,
Speaker 1: It just hit different. We were like mano amano, two
Speaker 1: women with one daughter, two women who have undeniably been
Speaker 1: successful in this crazy journey, on this crazy path, two
Speaker 1: women who have been appreciated for their humor. Me more
Speaker 1: expected her at the Friars Club roast like she she
Speaker 1: has really leaned into not taking yourself seriously. She works
Speaker 1: with snoop, She's fully self deprecating, and she's earned it.
Speaker 1: Like she has earned it. She is relevant at her age.
Speaker 1: She looks amazing. She's out at the jingle Ball, like,
Speaker 1: you know, like, give the fucking shut the ride man.
Speaker 1: She deserves it. She won the prize. She she gave
Speaker 1: it to me, to Andy Cohen, and I'm giving it
Speaker 1: back to her to you. She deserves it, whatever it is,
Speaker 1: give her the fucking prize. So I went over to
Speaker 1: her at the jingle Ball, I I you know, turned
Speaker 1: to her and I gave her the prize and I
Speaker 1: kissed the ring indeference in adoration. But there was something
Speaker 1: different because I when I was younger and on roller
Speaker 1: skates and at Nobu and on that boat, there was
Speaker 1: something shakier about me, not confident. I hadn't earned it yet.
Speaker 1: I just hadn't gone through the ranks of it. I hadn't,
Speaker 1: you know, fought the fought, walk, the walk, talk the talk,
Speaker 1: proven myself really at a level where not only everybody
Speaker 1: else would think that I had earned my seat the table,
Speaker 1: but where I would really know that I've earned my
Speaker 1: seat at the table, like you know that I can
Speaker 1: get the same people on speed dial that she can.
Speaker 1: And it felt different walking over there. But she treated
Speaker 1: me differently, she received me differently. It wasn't even that
Speaker 1: she received me, She just met me in the middle.
Speaker 1: We were both two women, and there was just a
Speaker 1: vibe from the second I sat down, because trust me,
Speaker 1: if I got a cold vibe or any vibe, I
Speaker 1: wouldn't have done what I did. But there was just
Speaker 1: something about Mary and something about Martha and me walking
Speaker 1: up to her, it just it just was we were
Speaker 1: like equals, and it landed and I gave her what
Speaker 1: she deserved and is earned. And that was my story
Speaker 1: with Martha