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Speaker 1: Welcome back to another episode of Alchemy. There's COVID nineteen

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Speaker 1: one dish. I'm your host, Kevin Pop Yes that, Kevin?

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Speaker 1: What's that? Let me put it this way, if trying,

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Speaker 1: if time travel were possible, I would absolutely not kill

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Speaker 1: Hitler when he was a baby. I would get a

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Speaker 1: job teaching where he became an art student. Then I

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Speaker 1: would encourage him to be the best young artist in

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Speaker 1: the school. Eventually I get his work featured in a

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Speaker 1: few galleries. Nothing too big, you know, just enough, so

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Speaker 1: he made a modest living from his creativity. All along,

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Speaker 1: I was secretly the only one buying his paintings and

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Speaker 1: making sure he had become a young, respected painter. Also,

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Speaker 1: I would introduce him to some really cool Jews, fun

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Speaker 1: people his age who are attractive and charming, and they

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Speaker 1: would take him to parties and he would grow to

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Speaker 1: dig these funky Jews. Oh Adolph, you fool, but I digress.

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Speaker 1: Let's meet our Alchemy, shall we? In no particular orders,

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Speaker 1: say hey to Chris Alvarado, collector of Hearts. Have you

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Speaker 1: dined out with friends yet? And if not, what are

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Speaker 1: you doing for lunch Friday? Oh? Baby? Uh? I have

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Speaker 1: and not just any friends, but my pandemic dog park friends.

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Speaker 1: Look out. Yeah, people that we met behind the mask

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Speaker 1: as it were, uh for a year. We're very respectful

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Speaker 1: of each other's space and and and mask wearing. And

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Speaker 1: then came to vaccines and then some of the light

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Speaker 1: opening up here in Studio City, California, and we went

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Speaker 1: out to dinner with them, nice, lovely, lovely time just

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Speaker 1: to talk to a couple of people that you met

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Speaker 1: at the dog park. Oh that is so cool and

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Speaker 1: how fortuitous that the city named that dog park pandemic park. Hey,

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Speaker 1: what the who? It's a tool sing spice of life?

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Speaker 1: Favorite thing you overheard anyone say recently. I haven't been

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Speaker 1: around anybody so eaves Trump. But your wife you heard

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Speaker 1: Chris though? Right? Yeah, yeah I did overseas. I wasn't

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Speaker 1: a win on a walk yesterday and there was a

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Speaker 1: yellow couch somebody had put out. People put out couches

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Speaker 1: onto the street from people they do. I'm assuming it

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Speaker 1: was an art project because it just had red paint

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Speaker 1: splattered on it and just like half a grocery back

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Speaker 1: covering it. And yeah, and I just it made me

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Speaker 1: think of that, like the meme or whatever. It's like

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Speaker 1: overheard in l A. But just like overseen in l A.

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Speaker 1: Like I was like, somebody messed up a murder and

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Speaker 1: then try to just put it up for recycling. I

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Speaker 1: can't wait to see the photos you definitely took and now,

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Speaker 1: James Heeney jingly, Jim was very memorable ski trip you

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Speaker 1: care to share. I don't know if I told it before,

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Speaker 1: but in sixth grade I went skiing and the very

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Speaker 1: first time up in my bed fifth grade doesn't matter,

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Speaker 1: fifth or six. I went up the ski lift. No,

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Speaker 1: it doesn't matter, fifth or six. God damn it. I

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Speaker 1: think it was sixth grade. I think it was a

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Speaker 1: sixth grade trip. Then we call it six. Yeah, let's

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Speaker 1: call it six. So the very first time up the

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Speaker 1: chairlift that takes you all the way up the top,

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Speaker 1: I got too scared to get off, so it started

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Speaker 1: to go back up again, and the top part, I

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Speaker 1: got even more scared that it was gonna dump me

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Speaker 1: and I was gonna fall, So I jumped, So I jumped,

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Speaker 1: So I jumped out of the chairlift, and I and

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Speaker 1: I just crumpled on the ground. Everyone ever had the

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Speaker 1: same fear on the way up, and many not a

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Speaker 1: larger percentage chose to stay on it and ride back down.

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Speaker 1: Only one jumped. Yeah, I guess I'm a percenter. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: I don't know what I thought it was gonna happen,

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Speaker 1: but I I remember that fear really well. And uh,

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Speaker 1: I didn't see anybody on the chairs going down, so

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Speaker 1: I thought, if you like, I don't know, I thought

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Speaker 1: maybe at the turn it was going to turn sideways

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Speaker 1: and just shake off anybody it was. It's very intimidating

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Speaker 1: that moment when it's oh, it's time to just glide

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Speaker 1: off the chair at the top. You see other people

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Speaker 1: do and you're like, oh man, that looks easy. Then

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Speaker 1: at your turn it's like, oh yeah, it's the worst

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Speaker 1: part about king. I hate it. And there's Craig Kaikowski,

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Speaker 1: Kakow will you be joining Chris and I for lunch? Uh?

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Speaker 1: Look look at this dude. Look at this dude. Look Kevin,

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Speaker 1: look at this guy? Are you kidding me? Are you

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Speaker 1: kidding me? Got time for that dude? Look at him?

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Speaker 1: I don't know if time is the issue. What time

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Speaker 1: are we doing? Have you dined? Have you dined in

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Speaker 1: a restaurant? Yeah? Uh, my wife and I went out

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Speaker 1: for our first restaurant meal in fourteen months. Last week

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Speaker 1: and we returned to the scene of the crime, place

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Speaker 1: in the neighborhood where we had last eaten the night

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Speaker 1: before the shutdown started, so March twelve, and uh yeah,

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Speaker 1: we dined outside and it wasn't it wasn't crazy. Congratulations

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Speaker 1: And again, how for tu it is that the city

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Speaker 1: named that restaurant scene of the crime. All right, let's

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Speaker 1: do a damn show all of our scenes suggestions. I'm

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Speaker 1: here to Joey, Hey, weirdly shaped balls? Which fetish? Are

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Speaker 1: you glad you tried and decided there was simply no

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Speaker 1: future in it. He's got the couch that looks way

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Speaker 1: more like blood than I thought. Yeah, fetish? Was I into?

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Speaker 1: What fetish? Did you try and decide it was simply

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Speaker 1: no future in it? Um cryptocurrency. As I was saying,

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Speaker 1: Let's do a damn show all of our scene suggestions

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Speaker 1: gathered from your listener emails or from our patroon v

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Speaker 1: I pays to become a patron supporter of the show

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Speaker 1: and enjoy exclusive content and other perks like video of Joey.

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Speaker 1: Just head on over to patron dot com slash Alchemy.

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Speaker 1: This we also a video of Chris looking in the

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Speaker 1: mirror and going h If you'd like to submit a

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Speaker 1: scene suggestion via email, please write to the podcast at

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Speaker 1: our new email address, Alchemy. This email at gmail dot com.

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Speaker 1: That's Alchemy Gmail. All right, here's a note from patron

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Speaker 1: al comniac and forever friend to the show, Mary Grace. Hey, y'all,

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Speaker 1: thank you so much for your using my last suggestion,

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Speaker 1: and a huge thank you to Chris for having the

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Speaker 1: same mindset as me when first hearing the term, what

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Speaker 1: was it? Paul? Yeah, Paul holding posting, post holding, post holing,

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Speaker 1: God damn it. Yes, Um. I was actually on a

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Speaker 1: hike to a Denali view point when a group of

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Speaker 1: no shoers said, Oh, you're post holding something. Mother it

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Speaker 1: was I could have just gone to have so I

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Speaker 1: had immediate context, but nonetheless I have a gutter brain

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Speaker 1: and went there anyway. I try to email you guys

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Speaker 1: yesterday as soon as I heard the episode, but patroon

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Speaker 1: message messaging was down. Kevin, you asked for an Alaska update,

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Speaker 1: so here we go. This is a unique, magical, strange place.

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Speaker 1: I missed the community of West Side and have yet

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Speaker 1: to develop a group or community of friends here, but

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Speaker 1: I explore every chance I get. I have been to

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Speaker 1: multiple glaciers, seeing the northern lights multiple times, Jesus, gone

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Speaker 1: on a dog sledding adventure, and been to the hot

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Speaker 1: springs here, just to name a few. God damn uh

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Speaker 1: for Joey December west Side community. Sorry, that's way better

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Speaker 1: than the west second, way better than the West Side.

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Speaker 1: I'm leaving the West Side today, That's okay. I officially

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Speaker 1: began my time here in Anchorage on December. The last

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Speaker 1: couple cent of there was some good opportunities in the

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Speaker 1: nursing world, a new area of the profession, and adventure

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Speaker 1: of a place to live, and some financial stuff that

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Speaker 1: will likely leave me debt free in two years time.

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Speaker 1: That is also my commitment to work in here two years.

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Speaker 1: Arriving in December on one of the shortest days of

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Speaker 1: the year was odd. Learning that darkness really is an

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Speaker 1: issue was only something I didn't plan was also something

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Speaker 1: I didn't plan for. I didn't know how much it

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Speaker 1: was already impacted me until there was a day of

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Speaker 1: full sunlight after lots of darkness, I grew Actually, I

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Speaker 1: could actually feel my energy shift. What makes it even

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Speaker 1: more strange is that the amount of light is also

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Speaker 1: a mind fuck. Sunset is now ten pm, with actual

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Speaker 1: darkness not until eleven sunrise five thirty am, and of

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Speaker 1: course it starts to get light for that. Well, I'm

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Speaker 1: sure you have many other fan letters to read, but

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Speaker 1: I wanted to check in since it was asked, and

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Speaker 1: I offer a place for any of you as a

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Speaker 1: crash pad if you want to come up while I'm

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Speaker 1: still here. Please know my place is pretty hump. You

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Speaker 1: are welcome to use me as a base. I think

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Speaker 1: she means my place. Uh. If you have an adventure

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Speaker 1: you want to plan here. Loving all that you do,

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Speaker 1: keep the laughs rolling from Alaska, love MG. So no

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Speaker 1: scene suggestion, but just spectacular letter to us go So

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Speaker 1: thank you, Mary Gray. Scene one comes from Patroon v

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Speaker 1: I p Allison Kelly, who wrote and joined the podcast,

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Speaker 1: and thank you for the great work each of you do. So.

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Speaker 1: One of my coworkers hired someone off Craigslist pressure wash

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Speaker 1: there wouldn't deck to save money. Well, it went as

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Speaker 1: you might suspect, and they ended up with a damaged

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Speaker 1: wood deck full of grooves and splintered wood. Scene suggestion incompetent,

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Speaker 1: properly trained people on Craigslist getting hired for complex tasks.

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Speaker 1: Have a good one, Alison, Kelly, this is the backyard.

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Speaker 1: I don't know how much we'll need you back here today,

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Speaker 1: but I mean we know a backyard when we see it.

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Speaker 1: This isn't our first job. Okay, Okay, that's your name again. Sorry,

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Speaker 1: my name's Cheery. Okay, this guy is trying to explain

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Speaker 1: what it pick you it is I understand, but look

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Speaker 1: I just brought you on the job. It's just like

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Speaker 1: from some ext some money. Relaxed, right, Okay, Okay, it's

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Speaker 1: a little testy when people might, you know, tell them

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Speaker 1: about things. He knows. He knows a lot of things.

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Speaker 1: He does a lot of things stuff. You guys have

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Speaker 1: been on lots of jobs before, so you know that

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Speaker 1: that that moment that happens when people take you around

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Speaker 1: to an area and they introduce it. What you what

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Speaker 1: we did time together? And I know what it's like

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Speaker 1: to be taken around to an area A right to

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Speaker 1: hear that, what are you talking about? Rape? What? What

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Speaker 1: do you mean? What together? We did time? Right? You

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Speaker 1: were taking around to an area? What happened in the

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Speaker 1: other areas? Oh? And do they say these are the showers.

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Speaker 1: Here's the even though you know, we had a tight group,

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Speaker 1: so it wasn't really like that. But we would make

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Speaker 1: moonshine out in the toilet bowls and sometimes around in

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Speaker 1: the back we would we would do tattoos. Okay, first

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Speaker 1: of all, I can't believe. Look hold on, look at yeah,

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Speaker 1: look at this tattoo. Yeah, what's the infects and swells down?

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Speaker 1: You're gonna see that. It's that's that's Alec Baldwin. Uh huh,

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Speaker 1: it's Alec Baldwin. Didn't anyways, Sorry, thank you for coming

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Speaker 1: here to this top secret government institution. Now, as you

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Speaker 1: know from the ad, we're looking for somebody. Is this

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Speaker 1: is this the bathroom? Uh? Yes, sorry, the door was out.

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Speaker 1: The door was open. No, no, no problem. I could

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Speaker 1: see it's not a bathroom. I'm sorry. But okay, is

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Speaker 1: it like down the hall or uh yeah, the russroom's

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Speaker 1: down the hall? Okay, sorry about that? Sorry interrupt? Should

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Speaker 1: I close the door? No? No, you're fine. You're fine.

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Speaker 1: You're fine, You're fine, So you're fine. It doesn't matter.

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Speaker 1: I'm I'm in charge here, so uh you're crazylest Ad

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Speaker 1: said that you and I was telling him like six

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Speaker 1: months ago. Is this a bathroom? No, I mean I

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Speaker 1: have a I have a private bathroom. So that's why

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Speaker 1: I said yes earlier. The public restaurant is just just

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Speaker 1: down the hall. Okay, well, just so you know, they're

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Speaker 1: telling people the door on the left. So who's they

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Speaker 1: the gentleman out front, the gentleman out front, it's tell

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Speaker 1: people that's the first door on the left. Yeah. The

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Speaker 1: guy who was like, you know, I don't know if

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Speaker 1: it's just a security guard like kiosk at, I don't know.

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Speaker 1: You're sitting at a desk on people like where to

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Speaker 1: go and stuff? So can you see your your badge place?

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Speaker 1: But yeah, sure, I'm a visitor here you go, visitor.

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Speaker 1: Oh what a weird name. You have a nice day?

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Speaker 1: I saw from your Craigslist. You are not You're fine?

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Speaker 1: Are you are a general handyman? Correct? Yeah, that guy

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Speaker 1: is still here, so I feel just so it's fine,

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Speaker 1: it's fine. I'm in charge. I'm in charge. So um, sorry,

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Speaker 1: there's a there's a piece of mahato sign. There's a

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Speaker 1: piece of mahato sign at the rest room. So I

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Speaker 1: don't think I'm supposed to go in. Oh it's I

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Speaker 1: think it's fine. I think it's fine. Okay, I think

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Speaker 1: it's fine. It's very odd for me with both of

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Speaker 1: these men just standing right here. Look, you're you're the

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Speaker 1: one posted the ad in crisis, and I'm we're responding.

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Speaker 1: This is a government, top secret government agency. Now, were

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Speaker 1: you looking for the bathroom too? Oh? Excuse me, I

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Speaker 1: thought that this was the bedroom? My shoulder, You got

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Speaker 1: my shoulder. Oh. I'm not a great shot. I'm not

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Speaker 1: a great general. Handy man's general. He's not a general. Craig, Um,

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Speaker 1: your your website is doing really well. I don't know

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Speaker 1: what else to say. Your website is doing really really good.

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Speaker 1: Thanks man. What what kind of coin are we bringing in? Uh? Coinage?

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Speaker 1: I mean heavy. I mean that we're talking gold minted,

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Speaker 1: you know, pure. Give me give me a number, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: you're right now. This month we're doing about eight. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: so thanks for really taking the reins on that. Yeah. No,

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Speaker 1: are you kidding me? I'm so happy just to build

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Speaker 1: something together with a friend. I just was you know,

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Speaker 1: we did this together, and it's your name on there,

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Speaker 1: so I figured, I don't know, if you want to

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Speaker 1: just maybe we could talk about adding my name Craig

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Speaker 1: and Joey's list. That's fun. I thought we thought we

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Speaker 1: googled that already, Joey and Craig just like alphabetically, just

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Speaker 1: like you know, I mean, it's pretty established as Craig's list, right, yeah,

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Speaker 1: yeah for now. I just you know, Nike changed their name,

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Speaker 1: so they haven't changed yet, but but it's I just

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Speaker 1: think that are they changing it to Craig. You're getting

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Speaker 1: off topic here, Okay, I I really think that. Look

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Speaker 1: from the you come in here and you say that

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Speaker 1: Nike has changed their name. You don't know what it is. Okay, everybody,

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Speaker 1: we're done with Nike. That name is out the door.

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Speaker 1: So I need ideas, tip top. You're hilarious, Boss, Jeff,

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Speaker 1: don't say anything again unless it's an idea to replace

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Speaker 1: a brand name. All right, kind be kind alright, e

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Speaker 1: e kind Nike backwards kind kind? Alright, that's actually that's

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Speaker 1: a pretty genius, Jeff, I apologize from earlier. Alright, hold on,

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Speaker 1: we can get we could get Richard kind to be

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Speaker 1: a spokesperson. We get what you're kind to do anything? Well, No,

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Speaker 1: I don't think it's kind. I think it's kind. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I just like I just like Richard Hi gentlemen, thank

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Speaker 1: you for coming. Please let me show you right this way.

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Speaker 1: So this is the backyard area of this top secret

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Speaker 1: government agency. This is a backyard. Oh, I didn't know

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Speaker 1: there was gonna be three of you. Yeah, we worked

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Speaker 1: on his back ye know. He just wanted to come

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Speaker 1: with us, so they said they had another backyard to

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Speaker 1: show me. I'm so sorry. Was I not just this

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Speaker 1: clearance involved? And it give me one second? So I

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Speaker 1: killed your friend as a yeah, yeah, it startled me.

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Speaker 1: It startled Trevor. We're provoking your CIA privileges. Um, well no, no, no,

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Speaker 1: what what what? What? What What? What? What? What? What? What? What?

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Speaker 1: When you call me Trevor, we're at a happy hour. Okay,

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Speaker 1: so we're on the clock. I need you to call

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Speaker 1: me General Death. No, I won't listen. Listen to me.

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Speaker 1: Where are our fucking drinks? By the way, Um, hey,

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Speaker 1: you have killed now I believe six people and wounded

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Speaker 1: a general. So that's that's too much. The body count

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Speaker 1: is to kill the sunrise, thank Margarita. Excuse me, excuse me, No, don't, don't, don't.

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Speaker 1: And then I think we're gonna be able to go

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Speaker 1: to Prague. And then after that we're gonna be able

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Speaker 1: to go to France, and then who knows, Trevor, where

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Speaker 1: should we go? Because I know whether your CIA badger

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Speaker 1: could be able to fly anywhere we want on the

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Speaker 1: government time. This is I don't find you attractive anymore, Lisa,

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Speaker 1: what you don't do it for me anymore? At Lisa,

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Speaker 1: what are you talking about? Do it for you anymore?

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Speaker 1: Here's a tequil sunrise and water with a splash of vodka. Okay,

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Speaker 1: there's a lot of salt on my water on the rim.

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Speaker 1: Can we just can I get that? No thalt on

293
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Speaker 1: my water? Do you? Lisa? Do you know what the

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Speaker 1: CIA actually stands for, UM Covert Intelligence Agency or CIGS.

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Speaker 1: Interests at hand, Craig's interest at hand. Yeah, that's the thing.

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Speaker 1: They never tell you about Craig, And they don't tell

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Speaker 1: you about Craig, Lisa, because there's a lot of secrets

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Speaker 1: going on in that top sic government building. I'll tell

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Speaker 1: you one secret that's not a secret anymore. I fired

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Speaker 1: what and I think you're ugly? Oh my god, you

301
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Speaker 1: were always below me. I'm I am taking everything. Where

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Speaker 1: are you going? Where I'm going? I'm taking the car? Okay,

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Speaker 1: get off at me? All right, bye, and you need

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Speaker 1: and then you just said blow me. That's so intense. Well,

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00:18:01,200 --> 00:18:03,040
Speaker 1: I mean I don't remember, but like yeah, like something

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Speaker 1: like that. So anyway, so so these shades here work

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00:18:07,080 --> 00:18:09,919
Speaker 1: really well on any collection, and so if you just

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00:18:10,000 --> 00:18:12,080
Speaker 1: buy sixty of these, right, you can be able to

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Speaker 1: resell them for like six, like ten times more of

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Speaker 1: whatever I'm selling them now too. And then I also

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Speaker 1: remember your your own boss. Oh, I like your your

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Speaker 1: own boss that I also have a knives set that

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Speaker 1: I really want to show you, and I also want

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Speaker 1: to so check this out, so if you want. I mean,

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Speaker 1: these are super rare, Like I mean, where'd you get them?

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Speaker 1: I got them from a friend of mine Craigslist. So ah,

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Speaker 1: there they calling Joey's list? What ad would you like

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Speaker 1: to post today? I wanted to post a singles ad? Okay,

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Speaker 1: And before we get started, how did you find Joey's list? Honestly,

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Speaker 1: it was a reroute from trying to go to I

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Speaker 1: guess I put Craigslist dot coke it, but then it

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Speaker 1: gave suggested things that maybe I was looking for, and

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Speaker 1: well here I am very nice. All right, what's your name, sir? James?

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Speaker 1: James James. Okay, let's get right to it. What are

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Speaker 1: you looking for? Well, I listen, I'm looking to put

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Speaker 1: up a singles out right. What are you looking for

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Speaker 1: in a partner? Oh, I'm not. I haven't thought about it, honestly,

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Speaker 1: I'm just trying to keep this on the deal. And

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Speaker 1: I well, I like Craigslist. Everybody sees. But here right

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Speaker 1: Joey's list, it's exclusive. Uh huh, James James, I gotta,

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Speaker 1: I gotta. Can I call you back a little? Who

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Speaker 1: is that one? It's okay because you're not in You're

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00:19:47,160 --> 00:19:49,240
Speaker 1: not currently in a relationship. I'm looking Why would I

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Speaker 1: be getting a single page if I was in the relationship?

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Speaker 1: Are you called me back? James Dames? Oh? Um, sorry

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00:20:00,320 --> 00:20:04,680
Speaker 1: I was. What was that? You're still so Joey. I'm

337
00:20:04,720 --> 00:20:08,840
Speaker 1: going over some of the tax documents from last year. Um. No,

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Speaker 1: I've been pretty hands off, you know, with the with

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Speaker 1: this business. Uh, what is what is Craig's interest at hand?

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Speaker 1: You know, man, maybe you should do a better job

341
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Speaker 1: of looking at after your own fucking portfolio. Dude, Okay,

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00:20:22,240 --> 00:20:26,159
Speaker 1: it's not my problem. Well it is because we are

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Speaker 1: in this business together. No, we're not. It's Craigslist. It's yours, Craig. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: but you've been working your ass off on it. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: I've been working my ass off on my own thing.

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Speaker 1: You know. Good luck when the CIA knock on your

347
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Speaker 1: door and everything you've worked for gets taken from you,

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Speaker 1: just like you took it from me, Craig, Just like

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Speaker 1: you took it from me. Your cat is drowning. Hey, Joey, Uh,

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Speaker 1: next to see you in the office. It's the man himself,

351
00:20:55,920 --> 00:20:59,520
Speaker 1: joe I wanted to go over some of the coinage

352
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Speaker 1: this month. Uh, talk to you about what Joey's list

353
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Speaker 1: is bringing in. Let's get to it. Let's get to

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Speaker 1: it right now. We're at eight zero baby, yeah, eighty

355
00:21:14,040 --> 00:21:22,679
Speaker 1: what what's that? Eighty what? Yeah? Eighty what? Eight eight bones?

356
00:21:22,720 --> 00:21:24,720
Speaker 1: Eighty claims and he let it you know whatever you

357
00:21:24,760 --> 00:21:27,080
Speaker 1: want to say? Wait wait, wait, no, no, what do

358
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Speaker 1: you what do you do? What do we talk about?

359
00:21:28,240 --> 00:21:34,200
Speaker 1: Eighty what? Eighty dollars? Eighty eight eighty dollars? Jesus Christ,

360
00:21:34,760 --> 00:21:38,479
Speaker 1: what's what's my overt? Exciting? You're gonna take it? Oh?

361
00:21:39,080 --> 00:21:43,080
Speaker 1: We gonna take it? Hello? Hi? Is this? Uh? This

362
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Speaker 1: is Joey's list? Yeah? Yes, the entirely phone in website.

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00:21:52,280 --> 00:21:55,280
Speaker 1: I like that idea, Greg and entirely phone in on website. Yeah,

364
00:21:55,359 --> 00:22:02,959
Speaker 1: you fucking do. Scene too comes from Charlie, who Kevin

365
00:22:03,320 --> 00:22:05,200
Speaker 1: Paul is well with you and the rest of the gang.

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Speaker 1: I'm looking forward to hearing the first episode back in

367
00:22:07,680 --> 00:22:10,879
Speaker 1: person wants it's safe to do so. Yeah, I guess

368
00:22:10,880 --> 00:22:14,000
Speaker 1: we'll be knowing about that soon and we'll let you

369
00:22:14,040 --> 00:22:19,199
Speaker 1: all know. My setgestion is a person ships themselves in

370
00:22:19,280 --> 00:22:22,480
Speaker 1: order to get out of being arrested. Joey or Caroline

371
00:22:22,560 --> 00:22:33,840
Speaker 1: feel like the obvious choice here, wow, typecasting. Thank you, Charlie. Uh,

372
00:22:34,080 --> 00:22:38,439
Speaker 1: we gotta ship, we gotta robbery. It looks like at

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Speaker 1: the liquor store, I don't do should we take that?

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Speaker 1: I mean we're on our breath. I mean it's kind

375
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Speaker 1: of our route. Yeah, and it's actually, you know what,

376
00:22:47,680 --> 00:22:50,879
Speaker 1: it's right there, this is it's across the street right

377
00:22:50,920 --> 00:22:53,920
Speaker 1: over there, and that guy is walking kind of slowly

378
00:22:53,960 --> 00:22:57,480
Speaker 1: out of it maybe, but just look at he looks

379
00:22:57,480 --> 00:23:00,160
Speaker 1: like he's trying to walk super normal. I could see

380
00:23:00,280 --> 00:23:02,840
Speaker 1: right through that. Yeah. Yeah, let's let's give him a

381
00:23:02,840 --> 00:23:06,520
Speaker 1: little question and answer. Here. Excuse me, sir, pardon me?

382
00:23:07,800 --> 00:23:11,960
Speaker 1: Hi there, Uh can we can we ask where your

383
00:23:11,960 --> 00:23:17,000
Speaker 1: head is tonight? But he's waddling. We got a waddler, sir,

384
00:23:17,400 --> 00:23:19,560
Speaker 1: Just hold up a minute. Could you hold up a second?

385
00:23:19,960 --> 00:23:23,560
Speaker 1: Hi there, Hi, Hey, My partner and I noticed you

386
00:23:23,680 --> 00:23:25,199
Speaker 1: coming out of liquor store there and we just got

387
00:23:25,280 --> 00:23:29,000
Speaker 1: a call, oh dispatched that there was a robbery, and

388
00:23:29,080 --> 00:23:31,720
Speaker 1: just thought, did you see and oh my god, yeah,

389
00:23:31,760 --> 00:23:36,040
Speaker 1: oh my god, did you see anything at like? No, no, no,

390
00:23:36,119 --> 00:23:38,639
Speaker 1: there was a no, there was no if I saw robbery.

391
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Speaker 1: Holy ship's paper back. What do you got there? Do

392
00:23:43,320 --> 00:23:46,199
Speaker 1: you buy something at the liquor store? I treated in

393
00:23:46,359 --> 00:23:50,080
Speaker 1: some it looks really full, like like just just let

394
00:23:50,080 --> 00:23:52,560
Speaker 1: me take a peek, let me take a rooney inside

395
00:23:52,560 --> 00:23:56,000
Speaker 1: of it? Holiday holiday holiday. I'm sorry, I'm walking by here.

396
00:23:56,040 --> 00:23:59,360
Speaker 1: I'm a lawyer. You need award to search this man's property.

397
00:23:59,480 --> 00:24:03,280
Speaker 1: How do you do sir? Wow, you ambulance chasers. Just

398
00:24:03,359 --> 00:24:05,919
Speaker 1: hang out on the street. Now. I worked behind you

399
00:24:05,960 --> 00:24:09,840
Speaker 1: guys specifically. That was smart. Just follow the case as

400
00:24:09,880 --> 00:24:13,320
Speaker 1: it's happened. That's right, that's right. Now. This is my client.

401
00:24:13,520 --> 00:24:15,679
Speaker 1: If he's if he had to give you a dollar,

402
00:24:15,880 --> 00:24:18,640
Speaker 1: all right, well he has. Why don't you reach inside

403
00:24:18,720 --> 00:24:22,000
Speaker 1: that paper bag here when you're in hand a dollar? Sir?

404
00:24:22,040 --> 00:24:27,879
Speaker 1: Do you want me to represent you? You gotta just

405
00:24:27,920 --> 00:24:32,159
Speaker 1: had me one dollar. I'll wait. Okay, while we're waiting,

406
00:24:32,200 --> 00:24:34,480
Speaker 1: can I ask what that smell is? Is anyone else

407
00:24:34,600 --> 00:24:39,160
Speaker 1: getting in front of a liquor store? For goodness? Oh?

408
00:24:39,200 --> 00:24:42,680
Speaker 1: Then they sell shipped there. I think there's there's homeless

409
00:24:42,720 --> 00:24:50,840
Speaker 1: people around here. There's whoa excuse me? Thank you? I

410
00:24:50,840 --> 00:24:53,000
Speaker 1: don't have a dollar. I don't have a dollar. Well,

411
00:24:53,040 --> 00:24:55,720
Speaker 1: I guess you don't have a client. Got well, I

412
00:24:55,760 --> 00:24:58,120
Speaker 1: got a five, I gotta ten, I got, I got twenties,

413
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Speaker 1: I got, I got loose bills. I got dollar. He's

414
00:25:01,160 --> 00:25:05,439
Speaker 1: the officer knows it's got to be a dollar. Hey, buddy,

415
00:25:05,440 --> 00:25:09,640
Speaker 1: funny buddy, did you shoot yourself? Just curious? Yeah, we're

416
00:25:09,640 --> 00:25:15,880
Speaker 1: gonna have to take you in. Oh, I don't think

417
00:25:15,880 --> 00:25:23,160
Speaker 1: we want okay, I want your clients here. No, nope, nope, nope,

418
00:25:23,160 --> 00:25:25,640
Speaker 1: take him away for I don't want to take him.

419
00:25:25,720 --> 00:25:27,879
Speaker 1: I don't want to take this guy. We don't have

420
00:25:27,920 --> 00:25:30,760
Speaker 1: a choice. And then I shipped my pants and I

421
00:25:30,800 --> 00:25:39,280
Speaker 1: didn't get arrested. Sunrise, Sunrise, Samie, this is my table.

422
00:25:40,600 --> 00:25:42,800
Speaker 1: I have heard the order. I'll take him both. I

423
00:25:42,840 --> 00:25:45,359
Speaker 1: don't care. I'll take him both. Thank you for being

424
00:25:45,440 --> 00:25:48,880
Speaker 1: so hospitable. Yeah, I'm not gonna pay for one of them,

425
00:25:48,880 --> 00:25:50,560
Speaker 1: but you thank you, Jamie. Can I talk to you

426
00:25:50,560 --> 00:25:54,840
Speaker 1: in the bag. You're welcome, thank you? No, thank you.

427
00:25:55,000 --> 00:25:58,240
Speaker 1: I am the manager here, all right, you're also my boyfriend.

428
00:25:58,560 --> 00:26:01,359
Speaker 1: No not you guys? Can you take this away from

429
00:26:01,400 --> 00:26:04,000
Speaker 1: my table story? I got a free drink. Just chill

430
00:26:04,000 --> 00:26:07,440
Speaker 1: out for a second. Alright, hoa, you needna take that. Man,

431
00:26:08,480 --> 00:26:14,240
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna take that. He's gonna poop again, stand bag?

432
00:26:14,280 --> 00:26:18,760
Speaker 1: Oh no, what is that? It would be making noise

433
00:26:18,800 --> 00:26:22,960
Speaker 1: if you pooped, and then I got a free drink

434
00:26:23,119 --> 00:26:28,760
Speaker 1: and a free appetizer. Okay, well, we're just interviewing you.

435
00:26:28,880 --> 00:26:31,399
Speaker 1: I don't know if your your whole posse needs to

436
00:26:31,440 --> 00:26:33,960
Speaker 1: be here for this, but I mean I just wanted

437
00:26:34,000 --> 00:26:36,800
Speaker 1: these are my references. I want to bring him here, right, okay, Well,

438
00:26:36,840 --> 00:26:38,680
Speaker 1: well we usually will check up and follow up on

439
00:26:38,720 --> 00:26:40,439
Speaker 1: the references. You don't need a phone, am inut. I'm

440
00:26:40,440 --> 00:26:43,399
Speaker 1: just says tight. He's tight. He's tight as fu. Okay,

441
00:26:43,440 --> 00:26:47,720
Speaker 1: well that's a that's a colorful anecdote. Certainly, basically, we're

442
00:26:47,760 --> 00:26:53,520
Speaker 1: looking for somebody to to provide security during the shift.

443
00:26:54,240 --> 00:26:59,359
Speaker 1: I mean, check this out, look at this, check that out?

444
00:27:00,320 --> 00:27:01,960
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, I mean I could sunk up any wall.

445
00:27:02,040 --> 00:27:03,600
Speaker 1: Is that supposed to be a gun sound? Where you

446
00:27:03,600 --> 00:27:05,520
Speaker 1: making a gun sound? But he is? He is, yeah,

447
00:27:05,560 --> 00:27:09,600
Speaker 1: he is me back, But no, no, no, I know

448
00:27:09,680 --> 00:27:12,000
Speaker 1: it's just it's not an automatic. But you understand, you

449
00:27:12,000 --> 00:27:16,760
Speaker 1: know it would it would do that if it's just

450
00:27:16,840 --> 00:27:19,959
Speaker 1: the bathroom. Yes, yes, it's the bathroom. I booked it.

451
00:27:20,080 --> 00:27:22,399
Speaker 1: I booked it for this meeting. Oh I gotta go.

452
00:27:22,560 --> 00:27:24,840
Speaker 1: So you want to move your meeting? Or should I

453
00:27:24,880 --> 00:27:29,240
Speaker 1: just go to Jesus? Okay, let's move out in the hall.

454
00:27:29,320 --> 00:27:33,439
Speaker 1: Let this guy use the ship. But that's what my

455
00:27:33,440 --> 00:27:38,040
Speaker 1: poop sounds like. So yeah, I mean I'm pretty much

456
00:27:38,080 --> 00:27:39,960
Speaker 1: free for every night, you know what I mean? If

457
00:27:39,960 --> 00:27:42,160
Speaker 1: you're telling me that this is it, I mean, dude,

458
00:27:42,160 --> 00:27:44,920
Speaker 1: I can watch this bank, no problem, no problem. Where

459
00:27:44,960 --> 00:27:47,760
Speaker 1: do you see yourself in five years? Well? I was like,

460
00:27:47,840 --> 00:27:49,520
Speaker 1: my buddy just asked a question. I don't know, man,

461
00:27:52,119 --> 00:27:56,480
Speaker 1: I don't know. To me, it smells like opportunity boom

462
00:27:56,720 --> 00:28:00,200
Speaker 1: and your Yeah, all right, you know what I'm really

463
00:28:00,200 --> 00:28:04,959
Speaker 1: feeling that right, All right, let's go on. I mean, like,

464
00:28:05,640 --> 00:28:08,920
Speaker 1: is there his question? I answered his question, Stan, I

465
00:28:08,960 --> 00:28:10,880
Speaker 1: think we're going to get in trouble for not arresting

466
00:28:10,920 --> 00:28:14,240
Speaker 1: that guy. What do you mean? I got this note

467
00:28:14,280 --> 00:28:16,720
Speaker 1: in my locker, says the chief wants to see me,

468
00:28:17,240 --> 00:28:19,480
Speaker 1: and it's usually not a good thing when I get

469
00:28:19,520 --> 00:28:23,440
Speaker 1: notes like this. So your right to that arrest? I

470
00:28:23,480 --> 00:28:25,880
Speaker 1: don't know. Man, Well that was pretty well, let's let's

471
00:28:25,920 --> 00:28:27,760
Speaker 1: call it what it is. It was the not arrest

472
00:28:29,640 --> 00:28:33,760
Speaker 1: in my office? Fun kind am I getting pulled into this? Well?

473
00:28:33,800 --> 00:28:35,439
Speaker 1: Who do the thing? Was with me during the not

474
00:28:35,600 --> 00:28:39,920
Speaker 1: arrest part? You? Hey, chief, shut the door behind you?

475
00:28:41,240 --> 00:28:45,440
Speaker 1: She did I read this report? Did you write up

476
00:28:45,480 --> 00:28:50,640
Speaker 1: this report? Hernandez? Uh, Well, here's the thing. Yes, I

477
00:28:50,640 --> 00:28:53,480
Speaker 1: wrote the report, but a lot of the pieces of

478
00:28:53,520 --> 00:28:56,720
Speaker 1: the report do you believe in destiny? I just got

479
00:28:56,720 --> 00:28:58,880
Speaker 1: off the phone with the mayor. He just chewed my

480
00:28:58,960 --> 00:29:03,200
Speaker 1: ass off because ship on the streets and your report

481
00:29:03,240 --> 00:29:06,280
Speaker 1: has it here, you know. So now now I gotta

482
00:29:06,840 --> 00:29:11,280
Speaker 1: I don't know how me badge and a gun in

483
00:29:11,320 --> 00:29:16,240
Speaker 1: a second. Just let me explain. Just let me explain. Okay,

484
00:29:16,680 --> 00:29:20,040
Speaker 1: you know how in the big bang of the universe

485
00:29:20,120 --> 00:29:22,800
Speaker 1: like the TV show I love that show. No, no, no, no,

486
00:29:23,040 --> 00:29:26,560
Speaker 1: the universe. I could starts there's it's it's a chemical

487
00:29:26,640 --> 00:29:30,800
Speaker 1: reaction and really like destiny, Like I couldn't have arrested

488
00:29:30,840 --> 00:29:34,840
Speaker 1: that guy I wasn't destined to. Why don't you shut

489
00:29:34,880 --> 00:29:37,840
Speaker 1: the funk up? I'm not the chief, just yellow. Do

490
00:29:37,840 --> 00:29:40,239
Speaker 1: you think that'll work? Yeah, that'll work. Listen to your

491
00:29:40,240 --> 00:29:43,920
Speaker 1: partner here, goddamnit first time. Let me look at your report.

492
00:29:43,960 --> 00:29:46,080
Speaker 1: You two, over the last year have caused the city

493
00:29:46,280 --> 00:29:49,400
Speaker 1: six point two million dollars in damages. You've let six

494
00:29:49,440 --> 00:29:52,520
Speaker 1: people go because they pooped themselves, let twelve people lush.

495
00:29:54,000 --> 00:29:57,080
Speaker 1: Oh excuse me, Oh no, it's fine. Get out of here.

496
00:29:57,400 --> 00:29:59,760
Speaker 1: We're trying to save money. Here the mayora's been chewing

497
00:29:59,840 --> 00:30:03,000
Speaker 1: my ass off, trying to get us chief. Can I

498
00:30:03,040 --> 00:30:06,800
Speaker 1: ask you real quick question? Is that the Quitari three thousand? Yeah,

499
00:30:07,680 --> 00:30:12,080
Speaker 1: that's a badass toilet. It actually says flush when you

500
00:30:12,160 --> 00:30:14,840
Speaker 1: hit the flusher. When you get up to my level, Smith,

501
00:30:15,040 --> 00:30:17,440
Speaker 1: you'll get these parks, all right? Does it have a

502
00:30:17,480 --> 00:30:20,960
Speaker 1: little bidet built it? What is going on? I'm not

503
00:30:20,960 --> 00:30:23,800
Speaker 1: gonna win reelection with this kind of thing. Happening in

504
00:30:23,840 --> 00:30:28,360
Speaker 1: the city. We're working on it. Mayor, we're working on it.

505
00:30:28,880 --> 00:30:37,840
Speaker 1: Get all of me. I don't want anymore. I have

506
00:30:37,960 --> 00:30:41,040
Speaker 1: to win reelection. I have to win re election. Stupid

507
00:30:41,040 --> 00:30:43,880
Speaker 1: people need to vote for me. May I did that

508
00:30:43,960 --> 00:30:47,360
Speaker 1: audit on the police department that you asked me to do. Apparently, Uh,

509
00:30:47,480 --> 00:30:52,680
Speaker 1: they spent of their budget on one toilet. Can be numbers?

510
00:30:52,840 --> 00:30:55,160
Speaker 1: Tell me what's going on. They bought a two million

511
00:30:55,160 --> 00:30:59,360
Speaker 1: dollar toilet dollar well than I make. How the hell

512
00:30:59,400 --> 00:31:01,000
Speaker 1: did they get that to much? Let's flush when you

513
00:31:01,000 --> 00:31:03,600
Speaker 1: flush it? So I want one, Well, we need to

514
00:31:03,600 --> 00:31:05,320
Speaker 1: come and do that. I need that toilet in my

515
00:31:05,400 --> 00:31:10,000
Speaker 1: office now. So we're taking the toilet from the police department,

516
00:31:10,280 --> 00:31:12,400
Speaker 1: grab grabbed it back in there. I think we could

517
00:31:13,080 --> 00:31:18,400
Speaker 1: the two of us could probably lift this. Excuse me, now,

518
00:31:18,440 --> 00:31:21,640
Speaker 1: we hired you from Craigslists. Yeah, the mpression that you

519
00:31:21,680 --> 00:31:24,720
Speaker 1: are experts. We are experts. We're gonna have this toilet

520
00:31:24,880 --> 00:31:28,560
Speaker 1: up and out of here. It's very expensive. It seems

521
00:31:28,720 --> 00:31:32,120
Speaker 1: pretty expensive. Yeah, it'll talk to you. Actually, what do

522
00:31:32,120 --> 00:31:39,400
Speaker 1: you mean, Well, it's sentient. Listen, hello, toilet. You know

523
00:31:39,520 --> 00:31:43,080
Speaker 1: nobody ever asks to listen. I bet it's not saying

524
00:31:43,200 --> 00:31:48,000
Speaker 1: much because because you're yanking it out of the ground,

525
00:31:48,360 --> 00:31:50,800
Speaker 1: hire someone to move a toilet. I got a call

526
00:31:50,880 --> 00:31:54,440
Speaker 1: from Joey's List. Back off that, Joey's List, we got

527
00:31:54,480 --> 00:31:58,200
Speaker 1: this one look, I called, saying I wanted jobs that

528
00:31:58,280 --> 00:32:02,160
Speaker 1: involved toilets. Joys List called me back right, well that

529
00:32:02,640 --> 00:32:05,960
Speaker 1: At first I wasn't home, and I don't. I don't.

530
00:32:07,680 --> 00:32:10,800
Speaker 1: I don't have an answering machine, but I don't do Yeah,

531
00:32:10,920 --> 00:32:13,280
Speaker 1: I do have caller. I D and he said an

532
00:32:13,360 --> 00:32:15,760
Speaker 1: unknown number called what are you about? Halfway through this

533
00:32:16,560 --> 00:32:19,120
Speaker 1: later right call it back, I realized it's Joey's List.

534
00:32:19,680 --> 00:32:23,720
Speaker 1: The well, sir, um, we did the surgery and you

535
00:32:23,800 --> 00:32:28,200
Speaker 1: will no longer be shooting yourself. You will no longer

536
00:32:28,200 --> 00:32:33,040
Speaker 1: be shooting yourself. So, um, that wasn't my problem. What

537
00:32:33,120 --> 00:32:38,360
Speaker 1: do you what do you What do you mean? I

538
00:32:38,400 --> 00:32:40,160
Speaker 1: came in here for lasing. What do you mean you

539
00:32:40,160 --> 00:32:44,960
Speaker 1: did this surgery to myself? What kind of surgery is

540
00:32:44,960 --> 00:32:47,240
Speaker 1: that we do a full body scan? What is the

541
00:32:47,280 --> 00:32:48,760
Speaker 1: name of the disorder that even has that? What are

542
00:32:48,760 --> 00:32:53,800
Speaker 1: you talking about? You wouldn't understand it's Latin. We'll just

543
00:32:53,840 --> 00:32:56,360
Speaker 1: say it. What do I will understand? Say it to you.

544
00:32:56,440 --> 00:32:59,320
Speaker 1: The point is you won't be shooting yourself in public anymore,

545
00:32:59,320 --> 00:33:01,640
Speaker 1: and that's a good thing. I didn't have that problem.

546
00:33:01,520 --> 00:33:04,200
Speaker 1: I am nearsighted. I came in here for Lace. What

547
00:33:04,240 --> 00:33:06,360
Speaker 1: do you mean I can't ship? I can't ship, Trevor.

548
00:33:06,400 --> 00:33:09,200
Speaker 1: We're gonna let you go from this Lace six office.

549
00:33:09,440 --> 00:33:11,160
Speaker 1: So you're calling me by my name, you call me

550
00:33:11,240 --> 00:33:14,480
Speaker 1: by my first name, So that means that this lunch

551
00:33:14,560 --> 00:33:17,120
Speaker 1: is on you? Is that what I'm assuming? Sure, I'll

552
00:33:17,160 --> 00:33:20,160
Speaker 1: take care of it. But you've you've we've had six

553
00:33:20,240 --> 00:33:24,240
Speaker 1: counts of you going a little laser crazy um to

554
00:33:25,680 --> 00:33:35,080
Speaker 1: my butt hole. Please, Okay, Tim, that last one was

555
00:33:35,200 --> 00:33:38,680
Speaker 1: just a little long on the USh, So give me

556
00:33:39,040 --> 00:33:43,280
Speaker 1: a slightly shorter version on the read. We really appreciate

557
00:33:43,320 --> 00:33:49,960
Speaker 1: it when you're ready. Plus, I was a little too quick. Sorry.

558
00:33:50,000 --> 00:33:52,160
Speaker 1: I didn't want to give you that bad direction. We

559
00:33:52,240 --> 00:33:57,400
Speaker 1: do want to hear the word flush. Okay, Now you

560
00:33:57,440 --> 00:33:59,240
Speaker 1: sound like you're yelling at the perfect hold on, hold on,

561
00:33:59,280 --> 00:34:02,160
Speaker 1: hold on part of me. I am an agent. I

562
00:34:02,200 --> 00:34:06,880
Speaker 1: represent talent. Now, this this artist here, this artist here

563
00:34:06,920 --> 00:34:10,640
Speaker 1: doesn't have to take a direction from a session runner

564
00:34:10,680 --> 00:34:12,560
Speaker 1: if he doesn't want you. How are you buzz. You

565
00:34:12,560 --> 00:34:14,719
Speaker 1: give me one dollar right now. I will represent you

566
00:34:14,840 --> 00:34:18,759
Speaker 1: as your talent. Okay, I have an agent. Is this

567
00:34:18,800 --> 00:34:24,399
Speaker 1: going to be a conflict. Here's a Tyler terrific. Okay, now,

568
00:34:24,400 --> 00:34:28,400
Speaker 1: why don't you relax. Welcome to the new world. What

569
00:34:28,560 --> 00:34:29,840
Speaker 1: what do you mean you're firing me? I got you

570
00:34:29,920 --> 00:34:33,840
Speaker 1: the Hutari three thousand voiceover deal. Yeah, but the session

571
00:34:33,920 --> 00:34:36,319
Speaker 1: runner was trying to give me all these notes and

572
00:34:36,360 --> 00:34:41,920
Speaker 1: then another take the notes you take? No, no, I

573
00:34:42,040 --> 00:34:48,640
Speaker 1: kind of well, that's the problem with our agent. How

574
00:34:49,040 --> 00:34:52,800
Speaker 1: you do the job. But you're saying some guy wondered

575
00:34:52,840 --> 00:34:55,719
Speaker 1: in in the middle of your session, and now I

576
00:34:55,719 --> 00:34:59,000
Speaker 1: don't have to take notes from session runners. Oh god,

577
00:34:59,040 --> 00:35:04,359
Speaker 1: I've already spent the ten percent is crazy. I'm gonna

578
00:35:04,400 --> 00:35:05,719
Speaker 1: have all my friends come over. They're gonna be able

579
00:35:05,719 --> 00:35:08,440
Speaker 1: to get their lead sick obviously reduced price, family and friends,

580
00:35:08,760 --> 00:35:10,040
Speaker 1: and then we're gonna be able to see the word.

581
00:35:10,040 --> 00:35:16,239
Speaker 1: We're able to see problems. Do you when you look

582
00:35:16,280 --> 00:35:18,359
Speaker 1: in the mirror, are you happy with what you see? Well?

583
00:35:18,400 --> 00:35:21,040
Speaker 1: I can't really see. I need lasik. But I'll let

584
00:35:21,040 --> 00:35:24,080
Speaker 1: me tell you it ain't God who drinks? What is

585
00:35:24,120 --> 00:35:30,960
Speaker 1: your one with a straw. Thank you. It ain't good, Trevor.

586
00:35:31,000 --> 00:35:32,399
Speaker 1: You've got a lot of problems. What do you look?

587
00:35:32,680 --> 00:35:34,680
Speaker 1: I don't know what's going on, but I got my problem.

588
00:35:34,640 --> 00:35:39,200
Speaker 1: The problem is I lost my job. You did what Wait,

589
00:35:39,239 --> 00:35:42,000
Speaker 1: don't leave me though, No, no, no, I'm taking the drinks.

590
00:35:42,000 --> 00:35:46,040
Speaker 1: Who I'm taking? Who? Ugly? You're not taking the motorcycle? Bye?

591
00:35:51,200 --> 00:35:52,920
Speaker 1: I'm sorry. Sorry you making the noise of the motorcycle.

592
00:35:55,160 --> 00:36:00,319
Speaker 1: That scene too Oh golly, gosh, oh my me, make

593
00:36:00,360 --> 00:36:08,880
Speaker 1: it stop. Seen three comes to from patrion alcmaniac Mike

594
00:36:09,080 --> 00:36:14,720
Speaker 1: del Russo, who simply wrote, how about a stoned hit man?

595
00:36:15,320 --> 00:36:19,560
Speaker 1: Mike del Rosso? Thank you? All right? I need here's

596
00:36:19,600 --> 00:36:21,800
Speaker 1: the name of the person. I'm sliding it across the desk.

597
00:36:22,360 --> 00:36:29,080
Speaker 1: This is the person that I want. You two, Jim, Jim,

598
00:36:29,120 --> 00:36:31,480
Speaker 1: we've been working together for seventeen years. You want to

599
00:36:31,480 --> 00:36:33,359
Speaker 1: just say no, no, no, no. If I say the name,

600
00:36:33,440 --> 00:36:36,680
Speaker 1: and if we're being tapped by the CIA, they got

601
00:36:36,719 --> 00:36:39,160
Speaker 1: us right now. Since when are we being tapped by

602
00:36:39,200 --> 00:36:41,920
Speaker 1: the CIA? And also since when a people using the

603
00:36:41,920 --> 00:36:46,359
Speaker 1: word tapped, it's it's coming back, okay, So go with

604
00:36:46,400 --> 00:36:52,200
Speaker 1: me on this. The CIA has tapped our conversation, and

605
00:36:52,719 --> 00:36:55,080
Speaker 1: they hear you saying, I'm slipping this piece of paper

606
00:36:55,120 --> 00:36:59,719
Speaker 1: across the desk. There's a name on it. Yeah, how

607
00:37:00,200 --> 00:37:02,000
Speaker 1: but do you think the CIA they don't know the

608
00:37:02,080 --> 00:37:06,239
Speaker 1: name is. And then he passed the paper to him

609
00:37:06,280 --> 00:37:08,040
Speaker 1: and then he said, do I look at it now?

610
00:37:08,200 --> 00:37:11,160
Speaker 1: And then what's the name? Say? What's the paper say?

611
00:37:12,400 --> 00:37:18,520
Speaker 1: And how is this my interest at hand? Care at all?

612
00:37:18,600 --> 00:37:21,680
Speaker 1: Based on what your preferences were when you, you know,

613
00:37:21,719 --> 00:37:23,880
Speaker 1: put in your profile to the CIA that this is

614
00:37:23,920 --> 00:37:27,160
Speaker 1: what you like. It's some it's some algorithm that's saying

615
00:37:27,160 --> 00:37:30,399
Speaker 1: that I want to know about this, this conversation, yes, sir,

616
00:37:30,480 --> 00:37:33,040
Speaker 1: right between a monster and a hit man. Yes, sir.

617
00:37:33,080 --> 00:37:34,440
Speaker 1: I thought it would be important to bring it to

618
00:37:34,440 --> 00:37:43,040
Speaker 1: your attention. So the paper. I understand. You're looking for

619
00:37:43,400 --> 00:37:46,600
Speaker 1: new talent here. You just slide any piece of paper

620
00:37:46,640 --> 00:37:56,480
Speaker 1: with any type of name and I will pay. You're

621
00:37:56,520 --> 00:38:02,000
Speaker 1: looking for somebody to Hey man, the bus is not here, dude,

622
00:38:02,040 --> 00:38:04,960
Speaker 1: You're just gonna have to chill up, all right. You're

623
00:38:05,000 --> 00:38:09,600
Speaker 1: creeping everybody out, talking to yourself. I am actually looking

624
00:38:09,600 --> 00:38:17,040
Speaker 1: for representation though, Oh is that what you're offering? I

625
00:38:17,040 --> 00:38:18,759
Speaker 1: don't know. I should just take the bus. Yeah, man,

626
00:38:18,760 --> 00:38:20,600
Speaker 1: this this guy's comes to the bus stop. All this

627
00:38:20,600 --> 00:38:23,440
Speaker 1: is seven. No, no, no, no, I'm just gonna say it. Okay,

628
00:38:24,400 --> 00:38:28,239
Speaker 1: I'm stoned. Yeah we know, man, and I'm a man.

629
00:38:28,840 --> 00:38:31,919
Speaker 1: Sure sure, yeah, tell me any tell me any name,

630
00:38:33,360 --> 00:38:36,960
Speaker 1: tell me any name. I'm just do you want any name?

631
00:38:37,000 --> 00:38:44,760
Speaker 1: Here's the name Trevor. Okay, so sorry about that's crazy

632
00:38:45,080 --> 00:38:46,600
Speaker 1: that comes out here, stone out of his mind, just

633
00:38:46,600 --> 00:38:50,360
Speaker 1: saying that he's gonna off somebody. Are you taking the

634
00:38:50,360 --> 00:38:54,319
Speaker 1: express too? No? I just like sitting at the bus up.

635
00:38:54,480 --> 00:38:58,040
Speaker 1: I just real pretty come every week every Tuesday. Thank you,

636
00:38:58,200 --> 00:39:03,240
Speaker 1: James Garfield. I look like James. My name is James Carlson.

637
00:39:03,760 --> 00:39:10,680
Speaker 1: Oh your name is him? What's your name? Yeah? What

638
00:39:10,840 --> 00:39:22,200
Speaker 1: is it? Two two two two two? Oh you're dead? Ahi?

639
00:39:22,280 --> 00:39:27,680
Speaker 1: Can I help you? Oh? Uh? Yeah? Is um is

640
00:39:27,760 --> 00:39:32,759
Speaker 1: Trevor here? Uh? Not familiar with a fellow employee here

641
00:39:32,800 --> 00:39:37,480
Speaker 1: that goes by the name Trevor. You don't want anything

642
00:39:37,520 --> 00:39:43,120
Speaker 1: to eat? No, I'm just looking for Trevor. Okay, whoa,

643
00:39:43,760 --> 00:39:47,319
Speaker 1: I'll have what he's having? Is there a Trevor? Or? Hey,

644
00:39:47,400 --> 00:39:51,520
Speaker 1: you can have what I'm having? Oh? Sweet? Yeah, you

645
00:39:51,600 --> 00:39:54,960
Speaker 1: want to take a trip? Without leaving the farm. Oh.

646
00:39:56,560 --> 00:39:59,839
Speaker 1: I mean if the destination is your headspace right now,

647
00:40:00,040 --> 00:40:04,000
Speaker 1: then the answer is yes. Okay, Mark, we got you

648
00:40:04,040 --> 00:40:06,320
Speaker 1: on CCTV taking some kind of drug and then shooting

649
00:40:06,320 --> 00:40:10,399
Speaker 1: yourself right there at the sandwich station. So we're gonna

650
00:40:11,280 --> 00:40:15,000
Speaker 1: how's that airing on Canadian television? I don't understand. Well,

651
00:40:15,239 --> 00:40:20,200
Speaker 1: just the uh I think we have it. Yes, you

652
00:40:20,239 --> 00:40:22,120
Speaker 1: can get a foot long, sir, if you've just put

653
00:40:22,160 --> 00:40:25,160
Speaker 1: a fucking foot in it. Mark, Mark, Come on, Mark,

654
00:40:25,320 --> 00:40:27,080
Speaker 1: don't do this and I won't be talking like that.

655
00:40:27,200 --> 00:40:29,640
Speaker 1: Don't do this now. That employee of the month eleven

656
00:40:29,719 --> 00:40:31,480
Speaker 1: and twelve months and you're coming at me with this.

657
00:40:31,600 --> 00:40:35,040
Speaker 1: You got high Mark, and then you shoot yourself on

658
00:40:35,120 --> 00:40:38,200
Speaker 1: the sandwich line. All right, we have to throw everything out.

659
00:40:39,360 --> 00:40:42,160
Speaker 1: Can have a sandwich that's on me and most of

660
00:40:42,280 --> 00:40:45,080
Speaker 1: the sandwich meat. But the fact is it's happened before,

661
00:40:45,120 --> 00:40:47,040
Speaker 1: it will happen again. What do you mean that's it

662
00:40:47,080 --> 00:40:49,960
Speaker 1: happened before? What are you talking about? You're acting like

663
00:40:50,040 --> 00:40:52,160
Speaker 1: this is the first time anyone shoot themselves on the line.

664
00:40:52,280 --> 00:40:54,200
Speaker 1: If I don't get a sandwich, I'm gonna get my lawyer.

665
00:40:54,680 --> 00:40:57,560
Speaker 1: You're gonna be in trouble. Hey, I don't know if

666
00:40:57,600 --> 00:41:01,799
Speaker 1: you get your lawyer to come back. Can't. I can't

667
00:41:01,800 --> 00:41:03,600
Speaker 1: get steed for this. I can get for not giving

668
00:41:03,600 --> 00:41:05,120
Speaker 1: them a saying, which is a ruin us. You think

669
00:41:05,480 --> 00:41:07,480
Speaker 1: fourteen year old dipsh It's gonna come back here with

670
00:41:07,520 --> 00:41:11,759
Speaker 1: a lawyer. Look, lawyers are everywhere now and they talk

671
00:41:11,840 --> 00:41:19,200
Speaker 1: to me. What's going on? What's at the second? My family?

672
00:41:19,239 --> 00:41:22,799
Speaker 1: There's nothing going on. I'm gonna need you to close

673
00:41:22,880 --> 00:41:24,880
Speaker 1: the door behind you. I need you to take a

674
00:41:25,000 --> 00:41:28,520
Speaker 1: drug test. Rick. I feel like you're not following the

675
00:41:28,600 --> 00:41:33,480
Speaker 1: assassin's creed. So I've got this little cup here for you.

676
00:41:33,920 --> 00:41:36,960
Speaker 1: And if you wouldn't mind, because I know how tricky

677
00:41:37,080 --> 00:41:39,320
Speaker 1: we can be, I'd like you to pee in that

678
00:41:39,440 --> 00:41:43,000
Speaker 1: cup in front of me. Why don't you grab my

679
00:41:43,080 --> 00:41:50,640
Speaker 1: dick and do it? Are you serious, dude, dude? Because

680
00:41:50,680 --> 00:41:54,799
Speaker 1: I will don't don't, don't ask if you don't want that. Yeah,

681
00:41:54,840 --> 00:41:57,480
Speaker 1: that's what I Want's gonna be awkward. Okay, let me

682
00:41:57,560 --> 00:42:02,560
Speaker 1: lock the door. Okay, Okay, Phil. We have you on

683
00:42:02,680 --> 00:42:07,960
Speaker 1: CCTV grabbing Rick's penis to make him pete and that

684
00:42:08,120 --> 00:42:10,520
Speaker 1: was on Canadian TV. Well, what we need to do

685
00:42:10,640 --> 00:42:12,680
Speaker 1: is we need to start having audio on these videos

686
00:42:12,719 --> 00:42:15,600
Speaker 1: because contextually it made a lot of sense. I double checked.

687
00:42:16,000 --> 00:42:17,800
Speaker 1: He was how do you do a drug test? You

688
00:42:17,880 --> 00:42:20,400
Speaker 1: see him? He's bobbling back and forth like a bobblehead.

689
00:42:20,760 --> 00:42:26,279
Speaker 1: All right, Tom, Sorry, could you please uh read back

690
00:42:26,400 --> 00:42:29,840
Speaker 1: the first three items on the list for the Assassin's Creed?

691
00:42:29,920 --> 00:42:33,120
Speaker 1: I want, I don't want to get lost. Yes, what

692
00:42:33,200 --> 00:42:36,000
Speaker 1: are the first three? The first of the Assassin's creed

693
00:42:36,080 --> 00:42:39,120
Speaker 1: is that the assassin will always follow the oath taken.

694
00:42:39,480 --> 00:42:42,320
Speaker 1: The second is will always follow the orders of the contract,

695
00:42:42,400 --> 00:42:44,400
Speaker 1: and the third is will always fulfill the duty of

696
00:42:44,440 --> 00:42:48,640
Speaker 1: the contract. Okay, thank you? Um so for the fourth

697
00:42:49,680 --> 00:42:52,920
Speaker 1: on the Assassin's Creed? Do I have any ideas, any suggestions?

698
00:42:53,000 --> 00:42:55,000
Speaker 1: There are no bad ideas at this point. I mean,

699
00:42:55,120 --> 00:42:56,880
Speaker 1: is this not the right time to say maybe we

700
00:42:56,920 --> 00:42:59,680
Speaker 1: should change the name. I think we've gone far enough

701
00:42:59,719 --> 00:43:04,640
Speaker 1: with us Assassin's Creed. You what do you? What would

702
00:43:04,640 --> 00:43:07,760
Speaker 1: you like to do? I mean, we were Nike for years,

703
00:43:07,840 --> 00:43:10,560
Speaker 1: then we went with Assassin's Creed for some reason, and

704
00:43:10,680 --> 00:43:13,040
Speaker 1: it just feels like we we've lost the numbers, dipped

705
00:43:13,080 --> 00:43:14,719
Speaker 1: a big part of our brand. Jeff, I know the

706
00:43:14,800 --> 00:43:17,000
Speaker 1: numbers dipped. I know the numbers. You don't have to

707
00:43:17,040 --> 00:43:19,279
Speaker 1: say it again. I don't need your top, all right,

708
00:43:20,840 --> 00:43:22,960
Speaker 1: So I'm just putting it back out there. Maybe we

709
00:43:23,040 --> 00:43:26,759
Speaker 1: want to switch to something new. Can we struggle back

710
00:43:26,800 --> 00:43:31,560
Speaker 1: to the suggestion earlier of Eakin? We couldn't get Richard Kind.

711
00:43:31,640 --> 00:43:37,160
Speaker 1: That was the problem. Um so, uh, you guys have

712
00:43:37,719 --> 00:43:43,960
Speaker 1: snacks here at this Walmart? Yeah? I'll too. And do

713
00:43:44,080 --> 00:43:53,799
Speaker 1: you have um guns? No? What Walmart? We don't sell

714
00:43:53,840 --> 00:43:59,000
Speaker 1: good Oh I thought you did. Well, you used to,

715
00:43:59,200 --> 00:44:01,799
Speaker 1: but then store policy said we're not gonna be selling

716
00:44:01,840 --> 00:44:09,600
Speaker 1: arms anymore. We sell guns, but we don't sell chips here. Wait,

717
00:44:10,920 --> 00:44:13,160
Speaker 1: so you have guns, but you don't have snacks. It's

718
00:44:13,200 --> 00:44:20,080
Speaker 1: a gun store, so we have guns. Oh well this

719
00:44:20,280 --> 00:44:23,560
Speaker 1: is this is Nigel's chips and guns. But the chips

720
00:44:23,600 --> 00:44:26,400
Speaker 1: that you're looking for, I think, or crisps, which I

721
00:44:26,480 --> 00:44:33,240
Speaker 1: don't sell. I sell French fries and guns. Oh helloud,

722
00:44:33,320 --> 00:44:36,840
Speaker 1: this is Richard Kind. Please leave a message at the

723
00:44:37,000 --> 00:44:39,759
Speaker 1: BAP and I swear to God I will call you

724
00:44:40,000 --> 00:44:45,279
Speaker 1: right back. Yeah. I'd like to leave a call for

725
00:44:45,760 --> 00:44:49,640
Speaker 1: a job description for Joey's list. And this is the

726
00:44:49,719 --> 00:44:52,759
Speaker 1: number I was given We're looking to hire somebody to

727
00:44:53,280 --> 00:44:56,319
Speaker 1: clean up some poop that's on the sidewalk. So if

728
00:44:56,360 --> 00:45:00,319
Speaker 1: anyone knows anything about that, Hello, Hello, Hello, I'm picking

729
00:45:00,440 --> 00:45:04,520
Speaker 1: up okay, hey, yeah, so if you could just send

730
00:45:04,560 --> 00:45:06,600
Speaker 1: somebody over. I hope you cut the part that I

731
00:45:06,760 --> 00:45:09,239
Speaker 1: put on the recorder. Oh no, I heard you. I

732
00:45:09,360 --> 00:45:12,360
Speaker 1: was deciding whether or not to enter the car. So

733
00:45:12,520 --> 00:45:16,239
Speaker 1: you're saying there's picking up a feces involved. Yes, yes,

734
00:45:16,400 --> 00:45:19,440
Speaker 1: that's the job, and you called me. Yes, this is

735
00:45:19,520 --> 00:45:22,680
Speaker 1: the number that for Joey's List, right, Joey's List dot com.

736
00:45:23,000 --> 00:45:26,080
Speaker 1: Did George Clooney put you up to this? I'm sorry,

737
00:45:26,120 --> 00:45:28,600
Speaker 1: I don't know who that is. You don't know who

738
00:45:28,640 --> 00:45:33,480
Speaker 1: George Clooney is? Oh? The actor? Oh I mean I

739
00:45:33,600 --> 00:45:35,520
Speaker 1: know that, I don't know yet. No. No, let's go

740
00:45:35,640 --> 00:45:38,239
Speaker 1: back to the point where you were confused by the next. Yeah,

741
00:45:38,280 --> 00:45:40,279
Speaker 1: I thought you were talking about my friends, like I thought,

742
00:45:40,440 --> 00:45:43,960
Speaker 1: you know, I got friends, my friends with Trevor Rick, Jeff. Yeah,

743
00:45:47,200 --> 00:45:55,840
Speaker 1: open your eyes, open your eyes, good morning. What what's happening?

744
00:45:55,920 --> 00:45:59,400
Speaker 1: Why do you have a gun? I'm gonna kill you.

745
00:46:00,040 --> 00:46:07,440
Speaker 1: What are you laughing about? Thinking about the care bears?

746
00:46:09,160 --> 00:46:13,200
Speaker 1: What you're gonna kill me. That that part's really okay,

747
00:46:13,280 --> 00:46:15,600
Speaker 1: that's cute sound but what how are you going to

748
00:46:15,719 --> 00:46:24,120
Speaker 1: kill me? Oh? Oh ship? No? But it was just

749
00:46:24,239 --> 00:46:27,239
Speaker 1: like you know four is that Richard kind picking up dog?

750
00:46:29,200 --> 00:46:32,760
Speaker 1: Who's who's my chips to do that? It's it's getting

751
00:46:32,800 --> 00:46:37,040
Speaker 1: everyone just like kind of a comedic actor, just like

752
00:46:37,160 --> 00:46:40,560
Speaker 1: what movies all over my hand. I think total recall.

753
00:46:40,719 --> 00:46:46,040
Speaker 1: Thank using that, thank you the comic actor and total recall. Yeah,

754
00:46:46,600 --> 00:46:50,960
Speaker 1: it was like this comic reliever. Sorry, Richard, I can't

755
00:46:51,000 --> 00:46:53,160
Speaker 1: get you out of this contract because you fired me

756
00:46:53,719 --> 00:46:56,680
Speaker 1: after I got you a Pixar movie. Right, that was

757
00:46:56,800 --> 00:47:00,239
Speaker 1: my mistake and I was guys over and over and

758
00:47:00,320 --> 00:47:03,440
Speaker 1: I'll keep apologizing. Please come back to the phone. We

759
00:47:03,520 --> 00:47:06,480
Speaker 1: don't have a relationship anymore. Like, just looking at this contract.

760
00:47:06,560 --> 00:47:09,120
Speaker 1: Whoever your agent is, he's got you locked into this

761
00:47:09,200 --> 00:47:12,040
Speaker 1: picking up ship thing for a while. You know you're

762
00:47:12,120 --> 00:47:15,200
Speaker 1: you're not free to do anything. Oh you gotta help me, please,

763
00:47:15,239 --> 00:47:16,960
Speaker 1: There's gotta be a way to get what if I

764
00:47:17,120 --> 00:47:23,480
Speaker 1: hired that stoned assassin to kill who the agents I

765
00:47:23,600 --> 00:47:27,400
Speaker 1: shined up with? Are you not following this? Okay? Alright, okay,

766
00:47:27,480 --> 00:47:32,000
Speaker 1: so hire the stone assassin on Joey's list, which takes forever.

767
00:47:32,440 --> 00:47:36,799
Speaker 1: You kill, he'll kill the agents, but them and talk

768
00:47:36,880 --> 00:47:39,120
Speaker 1: to them. I'll be able to talk to somebody instead

769
00:47:39,160 --> 00:47:42,720
Speaker 1: of just hiring over the internet, which I don't try. Okay,

770
00:47:43,160 --> 00:47:45,400
Speaker 1: this is good because there's a lot of interest in you, Richard,

771
00:47:45,400 --> 00:47:49,480
Speaker 1: and I've already spent the ten percent. Uh, there's gotta

772
00:47:49,520 --> 00:47:53,480
Speaker 1: be a lot more, my friend. Okay, alright, well yeah,

773
00:47:53,560 --> 00:47:57,359
Speaker 1: let's get let's get this headman in the mix, Greg

774
00:47:58,080 --> 00:48:01,920
Speaker 1: uh Stony. I'm just here to check a check up

775
00:48:01,960 --> 00:48:03,040
Speaker 1: on you end. And you see if you got that

776
00:48:03,080 --> 00:48:09,239
Speaker 1: rent check for me? The rent check? Yeah, yeah, it

777
00:48:09,239 --> 00:48:12,919
Speaker 1: shouldn't be that's surprise, and you're confusing. It's the first

778
00:48:13,040 --> 00:48:15,360
Speaker 1: to the month or right checond of the month by

779
00:48:15,440 --> 00:48:19,200
Speaker 1: now right, it's actually the fifth. So uh if you

780
00:48:19,280 --> 00:48:22,160
Speaker 1: could um just slide the check under the door, that'd

781
00:48:22,200 --> 00:48:29,360
Speaker 1: be great, Okay, sliding it? Are you in line for

782
00:48:29,400 --> 00:48:35,080
Speaker 1: the bathroom? You're sir talking to me? Who's standing outside

783
00:48:35,120 --> 00:48:37,839
Speaker 1: the door right now? No, I'm waiting for a I'm

784
00:48:37,880 --> 00:48:39,719
Speaker 1: just waiting for a check. You slide it under the door.

785
00:48:40,640 --> 00:48:43,839
Speaker 1: Who is that out there, Tony? I don't know, just uh,

786
00:48:44,040 --> 00:48:47,239
Speaker 1: somebody I guess, I guess. I slit it. I slit it.

787
00:48:47,719 --> 00:48:52,879
Speaker 1: I don't see it. Where is it? Okay? Wait, which store?

788
00:48:53,000 --> 00:48:56,439
Speaker 1: Which store are you at? I'm sliding a check under

789
00:48:56,520 --> 00:48:58,560
Speaker 1: the door. Well I can hear you, and you hear

790
00:48:58,640 --> 00:49:01,920
Speaker 1: me right, I think this is from Okay, okay, alright, alright,

791
00:49:02,000 --> 00:49:03,640
Speaker 1: hear me out, hear me out. I know you're a

792
00:49:03,680 --> 00:49:05,600
Speaker 1: little high. You know you're here to kill me. But

793
00:49:05,800 --> 00:49:08,960
Speaker 1: what if I represented you in some kind of you know,

794
00:49:09,160 --> 00:49:18,000
Speaker 1: assassins union or something. Um, now, now, now, all we

795
00:49:18,080 --> 00:49:20,520
Speaker 1: need to do to make this all go away is

796
00:49:20,600 --> 00:49:27,360
Speaker 1: you just hand me a dollar, give me one dollar dollar,

797
00:49:28,600 --> 00:49:31,120
Speaker 1: share the wealth. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. That's what

798
00:49:31,239 --> 00:49:34,720
Speaker 1: I'm saying. That's what i'm saying. You know, I stay alive,

799
00:49:35,120 --> 00:49:41,279
Speaker 1: You stay alive, and you're well represented. Oh oh m hmm,

800
00:49:46,640 --> 00:49:48,799
Speaker 1: that's it. And then you kill the guy and that's

801
00:49:48,840 --> 00:49:55,320
Speaker 1: how it ended up. Yeah, that's crazy. He's dead. I

802
00:49:55,360 --> 00:49:57,120
Speaker 1: don't know if this is a movie, but I gotta

803
00:49:57,200 --> 00:50:00,279
Speaker 1: tell you that's a great story. There's one thing you

804
00:50:00,400 --> 00:50:08,440
Speaker 1: should know. Um, I'm now your agent. Finally, Oh this

805
00:50:08,560 --> 00:50:11,000
Speaker 1: is what you wanted. Yes, I'm trying to get out

806
00:50:11,040 --> 00:50:20,320
Speaker 1: of picking up. Pooh oh about that? Why is everyone

807
00:50:20,520 --> 00:50:27,319
Speaker 1: laughing at me picking up? I got you a movie deal? Um,

808
00:50:28,120 --> 00:50:34,560
Speaker 1: it's talking. It's called it's called poop picker ubbers. Okay,

809
00:50:34,640 --> 00:50:36,360
Speaker 1: I have to ask this, and I mean this with

810
00:50:36,480 --> 00:50:41,520
Speaker 1: the most respect possible. Are you high? I am definitely high. Definitely,

811
00:50:41,600 --> 00:50:43,960
Speaker 1: Mr mayor, Mr Mayor. We have a new applicant for

812
00:50:44,040 --> 00:50:52,319
Speaker 1: the communications John. Oh this toilet, Mr Mayor? Uh did

813
00:50:52,360 --> 00:50:54,879
Speaker 1: you hear that? I did? I did? Richard? Richard kind?

814
00:50:55,440 --> 00:50:59,839
Speaker 1: He says, Richard Kind. He says he has a kind.

815
00:51:00,200 --> 00:51:08,440
Speaker 1: Yes from total recall, Yes, yes, bring him in and

816
00:51:08,560 --> 00:51:10,839
Speaker 1: wash her fucking hands? Me or you you're the one

817
00:51:12,200 --> 00:51:16,200
Speaker 1: you wash there? You're so specific and ain't all about

818
00:51:16,239 --> 00:51:21,440
Speaker 1: this stuff? Mr Kine, please this way. I can't believe

819
00:51:21,480 --> 00:51:23,239
Speaker 1: a meeting the mayor. I'm going to meet the mayor.

820
00:51:23,400 --> 00:51:29,279
Speaker 1: This is hello? How are you hello? I'm well? Can

821
00:51:29,320 --> 00:51:31,560
Speaker 1: I'd be honest? I thought your office would be bigger.

822
00:51:32,160 --> 00:51:38,480
Speaker 1: Oh really, I'll leave yourself. We'll leave you to it all.

823
00:51:39,640 --> 00:51:46,800
Speaker 1: Thank you. Can I get a cheese sandwich? I'm he

824
00:51:46,840 --> 00:51:51,600
Speaker 1: seems nice, that's really, the assistant mayor. One of my

825
00:51:51,640 --> 00:51:53,600
Speaker 1: favorite sandwiches is just bread and cheese. As well, we

826
00:51:53,680 --> 00:51:57,319
Speaker 1: have a lot of common Richard. Okay, so, Mr Mayor,

827
00:51:57,680 --> 00:52:02,680
Speaker 1: I thank you for allowing me to come in today. Uh,

828
00:52:03,640 --> 00:52:06,799
Speaker 1: I'm playing I'm doing a movie. I know that's hard

829
00:52:06,880 --> 00:52:10,319
Speaker 1: for you to believe. I'm doing a movie, and uh,

830
00:52:11,440 --> 00:52:15,440
Speaker 1: I'm playing a mayor. I was hoping I could follow

831
00:52:15,520 --> 00:52:19,360
Speaker 1: you around playing a mayor. This might just be exactly

832
00:52:19,400 --> 00:52:21,960
Speaker 1: what I need. How would you like to be the

833
00:52:22,160 --> 00:52:27,400
Speaker 1: mayor of l A? I wait a minute, you may

834
00:52:27,600 --> 00:52:30,160
Speaker 1: really be the mayor. Why don't we switch places a

835
00:52:30,160 --> 00:52:34,520
Speaker 1: little Freaky Friday? If you will? Is that really good thing?

836
00:52:36,040 --> 00:52:39,120
Speaker 1: Freaky Friday? Hey, guys, can I order a cheese sandwich? Please?

837
00:52:39,160 --> 00:52:46,080
Speaker 1: Hold a ship? Absolutely? I just got lazing, so I

838
00:52:46,280 --> 00:52:50,080
Speaker 1: will not be shipping myself anymore. How did it go?

839
00:52:50,239 --> 00:52:52,800
Speaker 1: Was it fast? Was it pretty fast? The procedure? It

840
00:52:52,920 --> 00:52:55,799
Speaker 1: took hours? It took hours? Is that good or bad?

841
00:52:56,719 --> 00:53:02,279
Speaker 1: I mean like two hours? Okay? Is this is this bread?

842
00:53:02,560 --> 00:53:06,239
Speaker 1: I can't I can't tell. Okay, all right? Is it wet?

843
00:53:07,160 --> 00:53:09,560
Speaker 1: I can't tell. I can't see for ship, but I'm

844
00:53:09,600 --> 00:53:15,439
Speaker 1: not shipping myself anymore. That's our show. I can't see

845
00:53:15,520 --> 00:53:21,480
Speaker 1: for ship, but I'm not shipping myself. Oh and that's

846
00:53:21,760 --> 00:53:24,359
Speaker 1: thank all of our alchemists please, starting with Mr James.

847
00:53:24,440 --> 00:53:28,040
Speaker 1: He need James. Uh, you're gonna be with us, But

848
00:53:28,160 --> 00:53:33,200
Speaker 1: I understand you're leaving town. Yeah, I'm leaving town tomorrow morning,

849
00:53:33,280 --> 00:53:37,160
Speaker 1: bright and early. I'll be recording from Chicago. Okay, what's

850
00:53:37,200 --> 00:53:41,320
Speaker 1: going on in Chicago? Something fun? I hope, just seeing family,

851
00:53:41,800 --> 00:53:46,560
Speaker 1: seeing family. I'm I'm completely vaccinated now and it's time

852
00:53:46,680 --> 00:53:51,680
Speaker 1: to see the family. So you're dub vax plus fourteen?

853
00:53:52,000 --> 00:53:54,000
Speaker 1: Is that what you're saying. Well, by the time I arrived,

854
00:53:54,040 --> 00:53:57,400
Speaker 1: it'll be plus fourteen. Okay, sweet, sweet, and what we

855
00:53:57,520 --> 00:54:00,720
Speaker 1: are after effects from that second shot? I was okay,

856
00:54:00,960 --> 00:54:03,440
Speaker 1: but Aaron it was She said it felt like the

857
00:54:03,520 --> 00:54:05,960
Speaker 1: worst flu she ever had, and it lasted about a

858
00:54:06,080 --> 00:54:08,920
Speaker 1: day and then she was fine. That's good, that's good.

859
00:54:09,000 --> 00:54:11,080
Speaker 1: I don't remember asking about Aaron, but give her my luck.

860
00:54:11,800 --> 00:54:13,480
Speaker 1: I was fine, though. I had one night where I

861
00:54:13,560 --> 00:54:17,240
Speaker 1: had maybe some awkward dreams, but perhaps they were inspired

862
00:54:17,320 --> 00:54:21,160
Speaker 1: by or something, but that I didn't really get. Chris,

863
00:54:21,239 --> 00:54:24,360
Speaker 1: would you like to hear more about the awkward dreams? No,

864
00:54:24,640 --> 00:54:29,960
Speaker 1: I'd like my imagination better awkward dreams. No, I can

865
00:54:30,000 --> 00:54:32,680
Speaker 1: go there. Yeah, I spent a lot of time there, Chris.

866
00:54:32,840 --> 00:54:34,680
Speaker 1: What can folks find when they go to Chris Dash

867
00:54:34,719 --> 00:54:39,320
Speaker 1: Alvarado dot com. My gosh, you can find pictures of

868
00:54:39,440 --> 00:54:44,200
Speaker 1: me that don't actually represent you know, who I who

869
00:54:44,239 --> 00:54:46,239
Speaker 1: I audition for, you know what I mean? So you

870
00:54:46,320 --> 00:54:48,279
Speaker 1: have pictures of me of who I wish I should be,

871
00:54:48,400 --> 00:54:51,120
Speaker 1: but I don't line up with how casting sees me.

872
00:54:51,239 --> 00:54:54,320
Speaker 1: So that's the pictures are like James Bond stuff. And

873
00:54:54,440 --> 00:55:00,239
Speaker 1: then you're going throughout to read for boyfriend comedy. Sure,

874
00:55:00,920 --> 00:55:05,080
Speaker 1: um so, real big disconnect, their real big disconnect. Um

875
00:55:05,160 --> 00:55:07,480
Speaker 1: So spend some time. They're looking around, looking in my eyes,

876
00:55:07,560 --> 00:55:11,399
Speaker 1: and you'll see not much comedy happening there in those eyes,

877
00:55:11,520 --> 00:55:13,080
Speaker 1: you know what I mean. But the opportunity for you

878
00:55:13,160 --> 00:55:15,880
Speaker 1: to teach comedy is there right well, opportunity for me

879
00:55:15,880 --> 00:55:18,640
Speaker 1: to teaching provisation, not necessarily in the comedic style. We

880
00:55:18,719 --> 00:55:23,239
Speaker 1: can get more dramatic dramatic work. That's right. You want

881
00:55:23,239 --> 00:55:25,920
Speaker 1: to do some drama, get real and honest. Go to

882
00:55:26,080 --> 00:55:29,160
Speaker 1: Chris Dash dot com slash workshops and come take a

883
00:55:29,200 --> 00:55:33,160
Speaker 1: workshop or come watch a workshop free, sit in the

884
00:55:33,360 --> 00:55:35,480
Speaker 1: sit in the zoom room and just check out what's

885
00:55:35,480 --> 00:55:38,920
Speaker 1: going on. You'll be amazed. Period. I want to thank

886
00:55:38,960 --> 00:55:46,040
Speaker 1: you for more about James's dreams. Okay, this is your opportunity. Well,

887
00:55:46,080 --> 00:55:48,359
Speaker 1: how do you imagine james dreams? I feel like James

888
00:55:48,920 --> 00:55:51,320
Speaker 1: in my opinion. I think when James doesn't have enough coffee,

889
00:55:51,360 --> 00:55:56,400
Speaker 1: the dreams are psychotic, uh and probably span the world

890
00:55:56,520 --> 00:56:00,279
Speaker 1: of possibility that we could never imagine. So fair, fair

891
00:56:00,400 --> 00:56:01,640
Speaker 1: enough as long as he keeps him in his head.

892
00:56:01,760 --> 00:56:04,359
Speaker 1: But thanks for having me. This has been always It's

893
00:56:04,360 --> 00:56:08,680
Speaker 1: always fun and I appreciate. Okay, cool, Can you come

894
00:56:08,719 --> 00:56:10,880
Speaker 1: to lunch on Friday with me and Chris because apparently

895
00:56:10,920 --> 00:56:12,799
Speaker 1: Craig wants nothing to do it. Yeah, I'll be I'll

896
00:56:12,840 --> 00:56:16,879
Speaker 1: be anywhere, man, Okay, cool, Craig, thank you so much

897
00:56:16,880 --> 00:56:20,080
Speaker 1: for joining us today. Kevin, if you saw a group

898
00:56:20,120 --> 00:56:23,120
Speaker 1: of baboons, you would refer to them as a congress,

899
00:56:23,719 --> 00:56:28,319
Speaker 1: a congressive baboons, or a tribe or a troop, either

900
00:56:28,400 --> 00:56:31,640
Speaker 1: spelling of troop or a flange, which I think is

901
00:56:31,760 --> 00:56:35,000
Speaker 1: I prefer I'd rather run into a flange of baboons.

902
00:56:35,440 --> 00:56:37,920
Speaker 1: I like a flange of Baboon's not crazy about my

903
00:56:38,160 --> 00:56:42,600
Speaker 1: family the Baboons, but I like a flange a flange

904
00:56:43,960 --> 00:56:50,919
Speaker 1: um any thrilling adventure things coming up? No, excellent, Joey Greer. Yes,

905
00:56:51,239 --> 00:56:53,239
Speaker 1: I love that it's called a Congress of baboons. That's

906
00:56:53,280 --> 00:56:57,399
Speaker 1: so funny. Uh, they get it. I don't. I don't

907
00:56:57,400 --> 00:57:01,160
Speaker 1: have anything that's going on right now except the I've

908
00:57:01,200 --> 00:57:03,759
Speaker 1: been I've been just practicing martial arts on my own,

909
00:57:03,960 --> 00:57:08,399
Speaker 1: no instructor, no no sound, just me trusting my body

910
00:57:08,440 --> 00:57:11,840
Speaker 1: and trusting my moves, which is specific arts. Are you

911
00:57:12,000 --> 00:57:14,800
Speaker 1: studying martial arts? Mixed martial arts? I'm getting ready to

912
00:57:14,840 --> 00:57:18,440
Speaker 1: go on the octagon, oh, the mixed so just pretty

913
00:57:18,520 --> 00:57:22,680
Speaker 1: much whatever, you know, anything when it's ready. I can't

914
00:57:22,680 --> 00:57:24,760
Speaker 1: wait the debut. It's gonna be great at some point

915
00:57:24,800 --> 00:57:29,840
Speaker 1: of you guaranteed fits of fists of steel? Uh? Oh,

916
00:57:29,920 --> 00:57:31,840
Speaker 1: I don't even know was that? How do you know that?

917
00:57:33,120 --> 00:57:34,920
Speaker 1: Is that for sure? Thing? Do I get steel fists?

918
00:57:35,200 --> 00:57:38,000
Speaker 1: All right? And let's thank your engineer and producer to

919
00:57:38,080 --> 00:57:42,040
Speaker 1: the stars, Mr Doug Baine, the fine folks that I

920
00:57:42,120 --> 00:57:47,480
Speaker 1: heart Media's Kevin Pollock reminding you that we love to

921
00:57:47,520 --> 00:57:49,840
Speaker 1: hear from you. Please write to us at Alchemy this

922
00:57:50,000 --> 00:57:54,200
Speaker 1: email at gmail dot com. Um Recently, James read off

923
00:57:54,320 --> 00:57:57,760
Speaker 1: a review insisting that we had received several new reviews,

924
00:57:57,800 --> 00:58:00,040
Speaker 1: so thank you all who wrote them in and we

925
00:58:00,640 --> 00:58:02,840
Speaker 1: just poured in. I was I should have had it

926
00:58:02,920 --> 00:58:06,760
Speaker 1: up so I could read another one. We've got more reviews. Yeah,

927
00:58:06,840 --> 00:58:09,880
Speaker 1: you should have, James, that would have been helpful. Um

928
00:58:10,800 --> 00:58:15,080
Speaker 1: something look forward to, buddy. Be kind to each other

929
00:58:15,240 --> 00:58:16,680
Speaker 1: please until next time,