1 00:00:17,280 --> 00:00:21,319 Speaker 1: If it doesn't work, you're just not using enough. You're 2 00:00:21,360 --> 00:00:26,239 Speaker 1: listening to self red Radio, Special Operations, Military miss on, 3 00:00:26,520 --> 00:00:36,200 Speaker 1: straight talk with the guys in the community. Hey, what's 4 00:00:36,240 --> 00:00:39,680 Speaker 1: going on? Welcome back to another episode of Soft Rep Radio. 5 00:00:39,840 --> 00:00:42,159 Speaker 1: This is Rad your host today and I have a 6 00:00:42,280 --> 00:00:46,440 Speaker 1: very special guest, a United States Air Force veteran Bob Taylor, 7 00:00:46,720 --> 00:00:50,400 Speaker 1: flew about ten to twelve missions combat missions in Desert 8 00:00:50,440 --> 00:00:54,280 Speaker 1: Storm moved on. I believe as a major maybe lieutenant colonel, 9 00:00:54,480 --> 00:00:58,080 Speaker 1: into the civilian life to find himself and to figure out, 10 00:00:58,440 --> 00:01:00,640 Speaker 1: you know, some self reflections. I'm gonna put it out there. 11 00:01:00,680 --> 00:01:03,120 Speaker 1: And Bob, welcome to SOFTWAP and to our listeners and 12 00:01:03,200 --> 00:01:05,840 Speaker 1: viewers out there. Welcome. Yeah, thank you very much. It's 13 00:01:05,880 --> 00:01:08,720 Speaker 1: a great honor to be on your show. So thank 14 00:01:08,720 --> 00:01:11,040 Speaker 1: you for having me. Well, when you guys said, hey, Rad, 15 00:01:11,080 --> 00:01:12,600 Speaker 1: we want to be on the show, I was so 16 00:01:12,640 --> 00:01:14,920 Speaker 1: excited to have you on the show. So it makes 17 00:01:14,920 --> 00:01:18,760 Speaker 1: it a mutual feeling to have this extra good positivity 18 00:01:18,760 --> 00:01:20,520 Speaker 1: and karma out there where you want to be here. 19 00:01:20,720 --> 00:01:23,120 Speaker 1: We want you here, and we want to talk about 20 00:01:23,520 --> 00:01:26,240 Speaker 1: you know, just get right into the Air Force aspect 21 00:01:26,240 --> 00:01:30,800 Speaker 1: of it. Right. So nineteen eighty nine. What are you doing? Yeah, 22 00:01:30,840 --> 00:01:34,839 Speaker 1: so I was active duty and I was a fifty 23 00:01:34,840 --> 00:01:41,280 Speaker 1: two navigator at the time, and we deployed in nineteen 24 00:01:41,360 --> 00:01:47,240 Speaker 1: ninety nineteen ninety one for Operation Desert Storm into a 25 00:01:47,240 --> 00:01:50,240 Speaker 1: place called Diego, Garcia, where we flew eleve and combat 26 00:01:50,280 --> 00:01:53,920 Speaker 1: missions out of there, about twenty hour missions on average 27 00:01:55,120 --> 00:01:59,520 Speaker 1: round trip from halfway across the globe over I rack 28 00:01:59,600 --> 00:02:04,040 Speaker 1: and then in the same time no kid. Now, for 29 00:02:04,080 --> 00:02:06,800 Speaker 1: those of us that may not understand a navigator or 30 00:02:06,840 --> 00:02:09,640 Speaker 1: pilot's life on a plane, you can't pull over like 31 00:02:09,720 --> 00:02:15,200 Speaker 1: a motor home and like right, so you know everything's 32 00:02:15,280 --> 00:02:19,720 Speaker 1: happening while you're strapped to this flying machine through the air. 33 00:02:20,400 --> 00:02:21,840 Speaker 1: So how do you take a whiz? How do you 34 00:02:21,840 --> 00:02:24,000 Speaker 1: go to the bathroom? What are you doing? As likes 35 00:02:24,440 --> 00:02:27,080 Speaker 1: tell my wife. That's one thing that if I could 36 00:02:27,080 --> 00:02:31,000 Speaker 1: ever meet the engineers of the B fifty two, they 37 00:02:31,000 --> 00:02:34,480 Speaker 1: had the urinal tucked in a corner inside the crew 38 00:02:34,520 --> 00:02:37,959 Speaker 1: compartment and the heating duck went right by it, so 39 00:02:38,080 --> 00:02:41,800 Speaker 1: it over the course of the mission. It just made 40 00:02:41,840 --> 00:02:45,560 Speaker 1: things kind of miserable. But yeah, our crew stations were 41 00:02:45,560 --> 00:02:49,440 Speaker 1: all on ejection sees, so they were not designed for 42 00:02:49,880 --> 00:02:53,160 Speaker 1: long term comfort. You know, we had a parachute that 43 00:02:53,200 --> 00:02:56,840 Speaker 1: we were strapped into, and the pace of the mission 44 00:02:57,840 --> 00:03:01,760 Speaker 1: and the emotions and how you physically felt changed throughout. 45 00:03:01,919 --> 00:03:05,480 Speaker 1: So on your way there, on the way the target, 46 00:03:05,520 --> 00:03:11,520 Speaker 1: you're just mentally geared towards the mission. And we trained 47 00:03:11,720 --> 00:03:14,720 Speaker 1: hundreds and hundreds of missions so that we could do 48 00:03:14,760 --> 00:03:20,880 Speaker 1: this flawlessly. So you're just mentally geared prepared doing everything 49 00:03:20,919 --> 00:03:24,359 Speaker 1: that you're supposed to do handling any of the At 50 00:03:24,400 --> 00:03:27,079 Speaker 1: one point on our first combat mission, we lost one 51 00:03:27,080 --> 00:03:29,519 Speaker 1: of our engines and the pilots did a phenomenal job 52 00:03:29,560 --> 00:03:33,160 Speaker 1: of handling that. And we lost one of our computer 53 00:03:33,240 --> 00:03:37,160 Speaker 1: systems for our navigation system, so we had to shut 54 00:03:37,200 --> 00:03:42,680 Speaker 1: everything down and start midair with rebooting everything. And it's 55 00:03:42,720 --> 00:03:44,560 Speaker 1: not like a computer where you just shut it down 56 00:03:44,600 --> 00:03:46,400 Speaker 1: in a couple of minutes it comes back up. It 57 00:03:46,480 --> 00:03:49,920 Speaker 1: takes two and a half hours to recycle it. So 58 00:03:50,840 --> 00:03:53,720 Speaker 1: that and then when we got closer to the target, 59 00:03:53,760 --> 00:03:58,080 Speaker 1: you started picking up some enemy reactions to us being there. 60 00:03:58,960 --> 00:04:02,760 Speaker 1: We went into low l altitude and the best I 61 00:04:02,760 --> 00:04:06,760 Speaker 1: can describe, it's like its orchestra. What was your biggest 62 00:04:06,800 --> 00:04:11,120 Speaker 1: threat from those? Well, yeah, we picked up an enemy 63 00:04:11,400 --> 00:04:15,240 Speaker 1: fighter at one point. Okay, they didn't actually find us, 64 00:04:15,280 --> 00:04:17,480 Speaker 1: but they were out there looking for us. And then 65 00:04:17,680 --> 00:04:21,520 Speaker 1: probably the biggest threat was surfaced air triple A any 66 00:04:21,520 --> 00:04:25,720 Speaker 1: aircraft weapons. I was a surprised. We turned onto the 67 00:04:25,760 --> 00:04:30,320 Speaker 1: target and we had about ninety seconds before the target 68 00:04:30,400 --> 00:04:34,599 Speaker 1: time to go, and we ran our checklists. And you're 69 00:04:34,640 --> 00:04:39,360 Speaker 1: so hyper tuned to everything. Your mind can process things 70 00:04:39,400 --> 00:04:43,719 Speaker 1: so much faster than what you can at ground speed zero. 71 00:04:44,240 --> 00:04:47,640 Speaker 1: And so we ran this checklist in a couple of seconds, 72 00:04:48,279 --> 00:04:51,040 Speaker 1: and it happened so fast that we decided to run 73 00:04:51,080 --> 00:04:53,560 Speaker 1: it again to make sure that we had everything right. 74 00:04:54,320 --> 00:04:57,239 Speaker 1: And I had enough time to look in the two 75 00:04:57,320 --> 00:04:59,839 Speaker 1: screens in front of us. I had a night vision 76 00:05:00,040 --> 00:05:03,960 Speaker 1: camera and a forward looking infrared and I could see 77 00:05:04,000 --> 00:05:08,120 Speaker 1: these white, popping, crackley things in the screen and I 78 00:05:08,120 --> 00:05:12,280 Speaker 1: couldn't figure out what that was. And then I've realized, oh, 79 00:05:12,320 --> 00:05:17,800 Speaker 1: they're shooting at us. That's crazy. And so, you know, 80 00:05:18,520 --> 00:05:22,880 Speaker 1: the pilots just did a phenomenal job. They actually climbed 81 00:05:23,080 --> 00:05:26,520 Speaker 1: up into a little bit of a cloud bank, so 82 00:05:26,760 --> 00:05:28,839 Speaker 1: we were at you know, went from a couple hundred 83 00:05:28,839 --> 00:05:32,000 Speaker 1: feet up to about six hundred feet and they said 84 00:05:32,000 --> 00:05:34,680 Speaker 1: that they could see the tracers going through the clouds, 85 00:05:34,760 --> 00:05:39,480 Speaker 1: and the lead aircraft was struck in the tail end 86 00:05:39,520 --> 00:05:43,159 Speaker 1: of the aircraft going over the target. But I tell 87 00:05:43,200 --> 00:05:46,480 Speaker 1: you this just to kind of set the emotional tone 88 00:05:46,720 --> 00:05:50,440 Speaker 1: of these missions and how you're geared up and just 89 00:05:51,279 --> 00:05:57,760 Speaker 1: hyper focused, hyper tune, and then you know, you strike 90 00:05:57,839 --> 00:06:02,760 Speaker 1: the target and you fly. We flew right over the target. 91 00:06:02,880 --> 00:06:05,039 Speaker 1: You could see the target and the cameras as we 92 00:06:05,080 --> 00:06:08,840 Speaker 1: went over. It struck the target, and then we had 93 00:06:08,880 --> 00:06:11,640 Speaker 1: a couple of weapons that were hung on the aircraft. 94 00:06:11,720 --> 00:06:15,880 Speaker 1: So then our focus shifted to let's take care of that, 95 00:06:16,160 --> 00:06:20,400 Speaker 1: because he can't fly around with weapons, so we had 96 00:06:20,400 --> 00:06:25,000 Speaker 1: to jettison those. We had an aircraft come around the 97 00:06:25,040 --> 00:06:30,159 Speaker 1: back of us. Our number three aircraft didn't change its 98 00:06:30,279 --> 00:06:33,000 Speaker 1: radios over, so we thought that we had lost the 99 00:06:33,120 --> 00:06:37,360 Speaker 1: number three aircraft and they had a wax over us. 100 00:06:37,360 --> 00:06:40,480 Speaker 1: So we were asking them who this fighter was behind us, 101 00:06:40,480 --> 00:06:44,080 Speaker 1: and they said, you know, there's no one there. Well, 102 00:06:44,200 --> 00:06:49,320 Speaker 1: there's someone there, yeah, And the tailgunner kept asking the 103 00:06:49,360 --> 00:06:53,280 Speaker 1: pilot if he should shoot him, and I was I 104 00:06:53,360 --> 00:06:58,359 Speaker 1: was like in favor of the shooting, but yeah, but 105 00:06:58,760 --> 00:07:01,720 Speaker 1: it turned out it was it was a friendly aircraft, 106 00:07:02,080 --> 00:07:04,760 Speaker 1: just a fighter trying to kind of come up behind 107 00:07:04,839 --> 00:07:07,880 Speaker 1: us and give us some extra protection. But wrong place, 108 00:07:07,960 --> 00:07:11,040 Speaker 1: wrong time. Yeah, So the B fifty two's got a 109 00:07:11,080 --> 00:07:13,680 Speaker 1: gunner on the rear, huh Like, just like I'm thinking, 110 00:07:14,040 --> 00:07:17,560 Speaker 1: he actually sits in the crew compartment and has a 111 00:07:17,680 --> 00:07:21,640 Speaker 1: radar that he can use to aim the fifty caliber 112 00:07:22,240 --> 00:07:26,240 Speaker 1: machine guns out the back. Wow, fifty cals out the 113 00:07:26,280 --> 00:07:33,280 Speaker 1: back of the h that's crazy, that's cool. So you're 114 00:07:33,320 --> 00:07:35,960 Speaker 1: going through that, you're trying to get these radio changes 115 00:07:36,040 --> 00:07:39,320 Speaker 1: and getting making sure everyone's okay. You get this fighter 116 00:07:39,440 --> 00:07:42,560 Speaker 1: that's not supposed to be there, and then your mission 117 00:07:42,680 --> 00:07:45,640 Speaker 1: is you're done. Now you have to get fuel to 118 00:07:45,680 --> 00:07:49,680 Speaker 1: get back, and it's a long, you know, eight hour 119 00:07:49,840 --> 00:07:53,600 Speaker 1: trip or nine hour flight to get back from our world. 120 00:07:54,480 --> 00:07:59,320 Speaker 1: And so now that adrenaline starts to come down, right, 121 00:08:00,120 --> 00:08:03,760 Speaker 1: and there's not a lot of things to keep you engaged, 122 00:08:03,880 --> 00:08:08,119 Speaker 1: So then it just becomes exhausting and there's no way 123 00:08:08,120 --> 00:08:10,680 Speaker 1: that you're going to fly the rest away without falling asleep. 124 00:08:11,360 --> 00:08:14,040 Speaker 1: So you know, as a crew, we kind of took 125 00:08:14,040 --> 00:08:19,240 Speaker 1: care of each other and everyone got rest as they could. Sure, 126 00:08:19,320 --> 00:08:20,960 Speaker 1: So you guys kind of did the whole I'll stay 127 00:08:20,960 --> 00:08:26,160 Speaker 1: awake with the driver scenario. There was one time I 128 00:08:26,200 --> 00:08:30,760 Speaker 1: actually the pilot called me up to sit in his chair. 129 00:08:30,760 --> 00:08:35,160 Speaker 1: Well he took a nap. Yeah, the bombardeer radar navigator 130 00:08:35,200 --> 00:08:37,480 Speaker 1: sitting next to me. He was asleep. As I went 131 00:08:37,520 --> 00:08:41,000 Speaker 1: up the ladder, the defense team was asleep, and so 132 00:08:41,040 --> 00:08:43,679 Speaker 1: I went up there and I'm just what they call 133 00:08:43,800 --> 00:08:47,079 Speaker 1: station keeping. I'm just kind of keeping the plane behind 134 00:08:47,120 --> 00:08:50,480 Speaker 1: two or behind another B fifty two. Then I look 135 00:08:50,559 --> 00:08:52,720 Speaker 1: over in the co pilot fell asleep. So here I 136 00:08:52,760 --> 00:08:56,400 Speaker 1: am the navigator. I'm the only one awake. Right, you 137 00:08:56,440 --> 00:09:01,320 Speaker 1: want to sleep, well, I was. I had every reason 138 00:09:01,360 --> 00:09:04,400 Speaker 1: to stay awake at that point exactly. So you have 139 00:09:04,520 --> 00:09:08,920 Speaker 1: the hand on the stick, right, you're like, uh, programmed 140 00:09:09,000 --> 00:09:13,160 Speaker 1: you do. There's an autopilot, you trim it for altitude 141 00:09:13,200 --> 00:09:16,719 Speaker 1: and just toudjust the throttles here and there too, just 142 00:09:17,040 --> 00:09:22,600 Speaker 1: you know, keeping things go pathetic. How do you go 143 00:09:22,720 --> 00:09:27,880 Speaker 1: from running such a regiment of pt and running with 144 00:09:27,920 --> 00:09:30,680 Speaker 1: your crew and doing all these missions and constantly staying 145 00:09:30,720 --> 00:09:33,920 Speaker 1: hyper That's what it seems like that job entails. You know, 146 00:09:33,960 --> 00:09:37,839 Speaker 1: you're constantly training, running over targets in the deserts. Probably 147 00:09:37,880 --> 00:09:41,200 Speaker 1: flew over Utah deserts, training and things like that. Right, 148 00:09:41,480 --> 00:09:45,440 Speaker 1: so now you are you know, how old are you 149 00:09:45,480 --> 00:09:48,040 Speaker 1: when you start to get out of the detail you're doing, 150 00:09:48,080 --> 00:09:50,400 Speaker 1: you know, the military. Yeah, so I got out. I 151 00:09:50,520 --> 00:09:54,720 Speaker 1: was thirty thirty one years old, had a three year 152 00:09:54,760 --> 00:10:00,880 Speaker 1: old a three year old daughter, and and my wife 153 00:10:00,880 --> 00:10:06,319 Speaker 1: and I moved from there to Calna Szoom, Michigan. We're 154 00:10:06,520 --> 00:10:12,800 Speaker 1: originally from Michigan, so that was kind of returning home. Sure, 155 00:10:13,000 --> 00:10:16,280 Speaker 1: so in order to stay hyper, you had a child. Yeah, 156 00:10:16,280 --> 00:10:22,720 Speaker 1: exactly that things exciting, right, exactly in the story, everybody 157 00:10:22,800 --> 00:10:26,839 Speaker 1: go home, the show's over, have a kid, stay hyper 158 00:10:26,880 --> 00:10:34,040 Speaker 1: and stay young, watch some twins exactly right. Scooby snacks. 159 00:10:34,440 --> 00:10:38,040 Speaker 1: So now funny about Scooby Snacks. You know that's like 160 00:10:38,280 --> 00:10:42,000 Speaker 1: uh oh to the Scooby Doo analogy of them always 161 00:10:42,000 --> 00:10:45,160 Speaker 1: like zoinks like g Scoob like, let's get a sandwich, right, 162 00:10:45,280 --> 00:10:49,000 Speaker 1: He's like okay, Raggy And so it's like so like, 163 00:10:49,040 --> 00:10:52,200 Speaker 1: you know, mushrooms and uh, you know, psychedelics are out there, 164 00:10:52,280 --> 00:10:55,120 Speaker 1: and I know that you're someone who's dealt with trying 165 00:10:55,160 --> 00:10:58,960 Speaker 1: to find a way to get away probably from hills 166 00:10:59,000 --> 00:11:03,080 Speaker 1: and other drive medicines out there that maybe don't help you, 167 00:11:03,280 --> 00:11:05,360 Speaker 1: but you found something that does. And what are you 168 00:11:05,400 --> 00:11:08,480 Speaker 1: working with these days? So yeah, just to give you 169 00:11:08,720 --> 00:11:13,000 Speaker 1: a really quick background, when I left active duty for 170 00:11:13,120 --> 00:11:16,080 Speaker 1: whatever reason, I don't you know, I didn't see hand 171 00:11:16,080 --> 00:11:19,600 Speaker 1: to hand combat. I didn't see the terrible things that 172 00:11:19,679 --> 00:11:22,160 Speaker 1: were going on in the ground. We flew over it, 173 00:11:22,440 --> 00:11:25,080 Speaker 1: and so we always talked about that being kind of 174 00:11:25,080 --> 00:11:30,319 Speaker 1: a sterile environment. But something happened for my brain to process, 175 00:11:30,360 --> 00:11:34,240 Speaker 1: because I started having these nightmares that were just hillaciously 176 00:11:34,360 --> 00:11:38,680 Speaker 1: violent and I couldn't figure out why. But after about 177 00:11:38,679 --> 00:11:42,200 Speaker 1: six months of that, they went away. But to be honest, 178 00:11:42,520 --> 00:11:46,840 Speaker 1: I've still dealt with depression, irritability, a lot of the 179 00:11:47,040 --> 00:11:49,640 Speaker 1: kind of the same symptoms as a lot of people 180 00:11:49,640 --> 00:11:54,800 Speaker 1: with PTSD. And then sixteen years later, out of nowhere, 181 00:11:55,160 --> 00:11:57,840 Speaker 1: these nightmares came back with what I call a vengeance, 182 00:11:58,000 --> 00:12:00,760 Speaker 1: and I got to be where I was afraid to 183 00:12:00,800 --> 00:12:04,319 Speaker 1: go to sleep. I thought, you know, okay, I'll have 184 00:12:04,640 --> 00:12:07,000 Speaker 1: a drink here there to help me go to sleep. 185 00:12:07,640 --> 00:12:11,280 Speaker 1: One drink led to another, led to another, and it 186 00:12:11,400 --> 00:12:14,720 Speaker 1: just wasn't working. It doesn't really help because you I 187 00:12:14,720 --> 00:12:16,920 Speaker 1: could fall asleep, but I'd still have the nightmares and 188 00:12:17,440 --> 00:12:21,840 Speaker 1: I was not sleeping. So I ended up deciding after 189 00:12:21,920 --> 00:12:25,000 Speaker 1: sixteen years to go to the VA and start to 190 00:12:25,040 --> 00:12:29,719 Speaker 1: get some help. And part of that is learning from 191 00:12:29,720 --> 00:12:34,240 Speaker 1: a psychologist, learning coping skills and all that treatment helped 192 00:12:34,320 --> 00:12:40,120 Speaker 1: a lot. But I was also prescribed SSRIs, which are antidepressants, 193 00:12:40,160 --> 00:12:44,760 Speaker 1: and balta and these other things, and they helped. You know, 194 00:12:45,200 --> 00:12:49,319 Speaker 1: I would never recommend that someone not take a prescription 195 00:12:49,480 --> 00:12:52,360 Speaker 1: to help with depression things like that, but there are 196 00:12:52,360 --> 00:12:56,520 Speaker 1: side effects, you know. It affects intimacy, it affects that 197 00:12:56,880 --> 00:13:01,880 Speaker 1: your clarity and other things of your life. They aren't 198 00:13:01,920 --> 00:13:05,560 Speaker 1: always as effective as they are when you start out 199 00:13:05,559 --> 00:13:10,440 Speaker 1: on them. So I was on SSRIs for thirteen years 200 00:13:11,600 --> 00:13:16,599 Speaker 1: and my son found a treatment for their experiment or 201 00:13:16,679 --> 00:13:23,679 Speaker 1: researching MDMA and psilocybin for treatment of PTSD, and my 202 00:13:23,760 --> 00:13:28,120 Speaker 1: clinician recommended MDMA for me and she just felt that 203 00:13:28,200 --> 00:13:34,560 Speaker 1: it's it's a better drug for the PTSD and things 204 00:13:34,640 --> 00:13:38,880 Speaker 1: like that. So I got into this research project and 205 00:13:39,080 --> 00:13:41,640 Speaker 1: they are working with the VA and trying to help 206 00:13:41,760 --> 00:13:45,120 Speaker 1: veterans with PTSD. But I went through the treatment and 207 00:13:45,160 --> 00:13:49,320 Speaker 1: this was February first, and all I can say is 208 00:13:49,360 --> 00:13:57,760 Speaker 1: that it was. It was like the most incredible ancient healing, washing, cleansing, 209 00:13:58,840 --> 00:14:04,800 Speaker 1: spiritual forgiveness. It was. It felt to me like it 210 00:14:04,880 --> 00:14:06,959 Speaker 1: lasted about an hour, but it was five and a 211 00:14:07,000 --> 00:14:12,440 Speaker 1: half hours long, and it just washed away all my 212 00:14:12,559 --> 00:14:21,880 Speaker 1: anxiety and guilt and just was a complete renewal for me. Well, congratulations, 213 00:14:22,200 --> 00:14:25,840 Speaker 1: you sound good. I like how you're stating it, and 214 00:14:26,440 --> 00:14:29,800 Speaker 1: it just comes across eloquently and like you have found 215 00:14:29,880 --> 00:14:33,280 Speaker 1: some type of chee or then in that in this conversation, 216 00:14:33,480 --> 00:14:36,720 Speaker 1: I feel it for you. Yeah, it's hard to describe 217 00:14:36,760 --> 00:14:40,960 Speaker 1: because it wasn't a visual experience, you know. I think 218 00:14:41,040 --> 00:14:45,320 Speaker 1: people that try psilocybin talk about the visual stuff. This 219 00:14:45,440 --> 00:14:49,720 Speaker 1: was more of a spiritual energy kind of thing. I 220 00:14:49,760 --> 00:14:54,120 Speaker 1: would in this experience, I would bring energy in and 221 00:14:54,160 --> 00:14:58,359 Speaker 1: I was very aware of like a spirit that surrounded 222 00:14:58,400 --> 00:15:03,960 Speaker 1: my body and I had a I sensed like a 223 00:15:04,120 --> 00:15:09,400 Speaker 1: female guide or nurturing type of spirit. And this was 224 00:15:09,520 --> 00:15:14,240 Speaker 1: just at plenus right. It's it's in us, isn't it. 225 00:15:14,320 --> 00:15:16,480 Speaker 1: I mean, I've not done it, I have it. I'm 226 00:15:16,520 --> 00:15:19,240 Speaker 1: open to the idea, you know, I'm open to the alternate, 227 00:15:19,520 --> 00:15:21,600 Speaker 1: you know, methods to try to see if it can help, 228 00:15:21,880 --> 00:15:24,560 Speaker 1: you know, not just somebody who's been through compact PTSD, 229 00:15:24,680 --> 00:15:27,720 Speaker 1: but like other types of PTSD is tragic as well, 230 00:15:27,760 --> 00:15:31,680 Speaker 1: you know, so it could probably just from from It's 231 00:15:31,720 --> 00:15:35,440 Speaker 1: like self healing. Right, everything's within you that you're dealing with, right, 232 00:15:35,480 --> 00:15:37,040 Speaker 1: so when you take it, it's all it's you. You're like, 233 00:15:37,040 --> 00:15:39,440 Speaker 1: you're not seeing things, like you said, like the caterpillar 234 00:15:39,480 --> 00:15:43,200 Speaker 1: in Alice in Wonderland's not puffing out, you know, characters 235 00:15:43,240 --> 00:15:45,440 Speaker 1: out of its mouth. This is within you. Your your 236 00:15:45,480 --> 00:15:50,040 Speaker 1: brain is mixing with this substance to pull this out 237 00:15:50,080 --> 00:15:53,360 Speaker 1: of you. Yeah. She told me that it was the 238 00:15:53,440 --> 00:15:56,320 Speaker 1: only expectation I had. She said, I was about to 239 00:15:56,360 --> 00:16:00,360 Speaker 1: meet a version of myself and I know why idea, 240 00:16:00,600 --> 00:16:03,480 Speaker 1: And to be honest with you, I wasn't. I wanted 241 00:16:03,520 --> 00:16:05,600 Speaker 1: to go through the experience, but I had a little 242 00:16:05,600 --> 00:16:08,640 Speaker 1: bit of anxiety about what it was going to be. Yea, 243 00:16:10,360 --> 00:16:12,600 Speaker 1: but I was kind of I just wanted to be 244 00:16:12,680 --> 00:16:17,240 Speaker 1: a good trooper and go through it and experience it, right. Yeah, 245 00:16:17,280 --> 00:16:20,120 Speaker 1: So it was a mix of those, hey, let's let's 246 00:16:20,160 --> 00:16:24,440 Speaker 1: do this and holy crap, what am I getting myself into? 247 00:16:25,120 --> 00:16:28,640 Speaker 1: So it's a place that is is it a long 248 00:16:28,720 --> 00:16:31,680 Speaker 1: lasting experience. Can you tell me, is it like something 249 00:16:31,680 --> 00:16:37,760 Speaker 1: that's not to the point. Yeah, So this cleansing. So 250 00:16:37,800 --> 00:16:41,240 Speaker 1: I would bring this energy in and I could feel 251 00:16:41,280 --> 00:16:47,120 Speaker 1: myself getting this negative energy out and I did that. 252 00:16:47,280 --> 00:16:49,320 Speaker 1: It was like you know if you get grease in 253 00:16:49,400 --> 00:16:53,440 Speaker 1: your hair and use shampoo and you don't quite get 254 00:16:53,480 --> 00:16:55,360 Speaker 1: it all out the first time you do it again. 255 00:16:55,440 --> 00:16:58,560 Speaker 1: I did it like four or five times, and so 256 00:16:58,680 --> 00:17:03,200 Speaker 1: when I was done, I just felt renewed. But then 257 00:17:03,240 --> 00:17:06,800 Speaker 1: what I've found is since then I've gone through the 258 00:17:06,920 --> 00:17:10,280 Speaker 1: experience of it has changed his things in your life. 259 00:17:11,080 --> 00:17:15,879 Speaker 1: So like my relationship with my wife is far better. 260 00:17:17,280 --> 00:17:22,959 Speaker 1: The irritability and the things that go along it's gone, 261 00:17:23,680 --> 00:17:29,359 Speaker 1: just gone, and the depression gone. And if you can 262 00:17:30,240 --> 00:17:34,040 Speaker 1: imagine people that suffer from this stuff to have that 263 00:17:34,240 --> 00:17:38,120 Speaker 1: gone and to be able to experience life without it, 264 00:17:38,119 --> 00:17:43,440 Speaker 1: it's just it's game changing. What's the steps that someone 265 00:17:43,440 --> 00:17:45,840 Speaker 1: would take? Who's going to the VA. Let's say, you 266 00:17:45,840 --> 00:17:48,720 Speaker 1: know a lot of our listeners were going there. They're like, 267 00:17:48,800 --> 00:17:50,679 Speaker 1: what's my step? How do I get in? Do I 268 00:17:50,720 --> 00:17:54,879 Speaker 1: ask my doctor at the VA about this? Well, you know, 269 00:17:54,920 --> 00:17:58,200 Speaker 1: the VA is trying to catch up and it's a 270 00:17:58,240 --> 00:18:02,480 Speaker 1: tough situation. I happened on it because my son is 271 00:18:02,640 --> 00:18:08,560 Speaker 1: more kind of a spiritual researcher. Yeah, he's well, he 272 00:18:08,600 --> 00:18:11,159 Speaker 1: cares about his dad and wants his good things for 273 00:18:11,240 --> 00:18:14,760 Speaker 1: his dad. So he reached out and he found someone 274 00:18:14,800 --> 00:18:20,000 Speaker 1: to help. So I basically stumbled into it, but I 275 00:18:20,080 --> 00:18:24,320 Speaker 1: chased it down and was able to. But this clinician 276 00:18:24,400 --> 00:18:28,160 Speaker 1: also mentioned that, you know, if someone wants to message 277 00:18:28,200 --> 00:18:33,280 Speaker 1: me through patriot Promise dot org that she's helping other 278 00:18:33,359 --> 00:18:37,359 Speaker 1: veterans as well. Patriot Promise dot org. You can go 279 00:18:37,480 --> 00:18:40,320 Speaker 1: check that out and there's some contact information. If you 280 00:18:40,320 --> 00:18:42,800 Speaker 1: have questions about this conversation and you want to learn 281 00:18:42,840 --> 00:18:45,200 Speaker 1: more about that, that's for sure check that out. That'll 282 00:18:45,240 --> 00:18:47,680 Speaker 1: be put in our conversation piece on the website too, 283 00:18:47,720 --> 00:18:49,840 Speaker 1: just so you know, so anybody can like click on that, 284 00:18:50,000 --> 00:18:53,240 Speaker 1: so we'll make sure that's there. Yeah. You know, when 285 00:18:53,280 --> 00:18:56,919 Speaker 1: I wake up in the day, talking about my mental 286 00:18:56,960 --> 00:19:00,280 Speaker 1: health issues isn't on the top five of the things 287 00:19:00,280 --> 00:19:07,119 Speaker 1: I want to do. And really, you know, vulnerable. You know, 288 00:19:07,800 --> 00:19:10,760 Speaker 1: I put stuff out on my Facebook page and you'd 289 00:19:10,760 --> 00:19:13,760 Speaker 1: be surprised at the negative things that can come back. 290 00:19:14,280 --> 00:19:17,920 Speaker 1: I'm just shocked at some of it, But so it's 291 00:19:17,920 --> 00:19:21,800 Speaker 1: not really a high priority for me other than I 292 00:19:21,920 --> 00:19:26,200 Speaker 1: want to share this. I want other people that are suffering. 293 00:19:26,800 --> 00:19:30,040 Speaker 1: I'm not a guy that sits in an office thinking 294 00:19:30,119 --> 00:19:34,479 Speaker 1: of ways that I can help people, other than I 295 00:19:34,520 --> 00:19:39,040 Speaker 1: can share my experience and let people know that there's 296 00:19:39,040 --> 00:19:43,000 Speaker 1: a path forward and you don't have to just kind 297 00:19:43,000 --> 00:19:44,879 Speaker 1: of get by in life. There's a you know, I 298 00:19:44,880 --> 00:19:49,080 Speaker 1: wrote that book from Service to Success to kind of 299 00:19:49,480 --> 00:19:53,159 Speaker 1: help people understand that the best days that you have 300 00:19:53,680 --> 00:19:57,320 Speaker 1: are not done when you leave the service. There are 301 00:19:57,400 --> 00:20:00,360 Speaker 1: great things ahead of you in life, and there are 302 00:20:00,680 --> 00:20:03,320 Speaker 1: great days to experience and things that you can do 303 00:20:03,359 --> 00:20:07,639 Speaker 1: that far exceed anything that you've done in the military. Yeah, 304 00:20:07,680 --> 00:20:09,960 Speaker 1: and your book, how many books have you written? Is that? 305 00:20:10,119 --> 00:20:13,359 Speaker 1: Was that your first one? That you was my first book? Yeah? Okay, 306 00:20:13,560 --> 00:20:15,199 Speaker 1: and it's out right now. You can pick it up 307 00:20:15,440 --> 00:20:18,440 Speaker 1: at any Yeah, so you can get it at Patriot 308 00:20:18,440 --> 00:20:21,440 Speaker 1: Promise dot org. And we actually have a program where 309 00:20:21,480 --> 00:20:25,440 Speaker 1: if you buy one will automatically donate one to another veteran. 310 00:20:25,800 --> 00:20:28,880 Speaker 1: You can buy one, donate five, or buy one donate ten. 311 00:20:29,400 --> 00:20:34,240 Speaker 1: But it comes out all across all the bookstores. May second, Oh, 312 00:20:34,280 --> 00:20:37,879 Speaker 1: it's coming out Okay, may second, So I have laufer 313 00:20:37,960 --> 00:20:41,040 Speaker 1: copies that I can that I can use to help 314 00:20:41,240 --> 00:20:43,800 Speaker 1: donate and get these into hands of veterans right now. 315 00:20:44,560 --> 00:20:47,000 Speaker 1: We'll also put that in the little content down below 316 00:20:47,000 --> 00:20:49,080 Speaker 1: that it's coming out, you know, and the name of 317 00:20:49,119 --> 00:20:51,760 Speaker 1: the book, no problem. And what have you found by 318 00:20:51,960 --> 00:20:54,399 Speaker 1: writing this book? What's opened up your mind? You know 319 00:20:54,520 --> 00:20:57,480 Speaker 1: to Yeah, so tell me. I could write a book 320 00:20:57,560 --> 00:21:02,520 Speaker 1: where I didn't really understand that topic, right, So I 321 00:21:02,560 --> 00:21:06,600 Speaker 1: wanted to write about some of my experiences. I thought 322 00:21:06,640 --> 00:21:09,040 Speaker 1: that would kind of be just a little boring, so 323 00:21:09,160 --> 00:21:12,840 Speaker 1: I share. I shared some experience of other veterans too, 324 00:21:12,880 --> 00:21:14,880 Speaker 1: and then I did a lot of research. I did 325 00:21:14,920 --> 00:21:19,040 Speaker 1: a lot of research, and what I found was every 326 00:21:19,119 --> 00:21:23,960 Speaker 1: veteran is different, right, but we're so much the same. 327 00:21:24,840 --> 00:21:27,879 Speaker 1: You know, we look different. I mean, if you looked 328 00:21:27,880 --> 00:21:31,120 Speaker 1: at the two of us, that's a pretty good example 329 00:21:31,160 --> 00:21:33,840 Speaker 1: of how you can be really different but the same, right, 330 00:21:34,800 --> 00:21:38,800 Speaker 1: right exactly. And so what I found is that there 331 00:21:38,840 --> 00:21:43,160 Speaker 1: are twenty two million veterans, about eleven million of them 332 00:21:43,160 --> 00:21:47,320 Speaker 1: are struggling, and for the most part, they all feel 333 00:21:47,359 --> 00:21:51,879 Speaker 1: like they're in their struggles alone, and they feel like 334 00:21:51,960 --> 00:21:58,320 Speaker 1: they can solve the problem themselves prideful right, right? Or Look, 335 00:21:58,400 --> 00:22:02,040 Speaker 1: I got myself in to this, I could get myself out. 336 00:22:02,440 --> 00:22:06,560 Speaker 1: And I just want to say I did that for 337 00:22:06,640 --> 00:22:09,680 Speaker 1: sixteen years and it didn't get me anywhere. I tried 338 00:22:09,720 --> 00:22:11,440 Speaker 1: to do it all on my own. But there are 339 00:22:11,560 --> 00:22:14,320 Speaker 1: things going on in your mind. If I gave you 340 00:22:14,720 --> 00:22:19,000 Speaker 1: a saw, a hammer, and a screwdriver, you would know, hey, 341 00:22:19,040 --> 00:22:21,200 Speaker 1: those are tools. I know how to use them, right. 342 00:22:21,960 --> 00:22:26,880 Speaker 1: But if I gave you gratitude and forgiveness and mindfulness 343 00:22:27,520 --> 00:22:31,480 Speaker 1: and said go ahead and use those, it's just it's 344 00:22:31,520 --> 00:22:34,040 Speaker 1: not a tool that people are used to using, and 345 00:22:34,200 --> 00:22:36,960 Speaker 1: they're the most important tools that you need to use 346 00:22:37,440 --> 00:22:39,960 Speaker 1: in your life. When you get out of the military, 347 00:22:41,000 --> 00:22:44,440 Speaker 1: you're going the military in boot camp takes us from 348 00:22:44,440 --> 00:22:47,520 Speaker 1: many to one. We have all these individuals that want 349 00:22:47,560 --> 00:22:50,960 Speaker 1: to do individual things, and the military kind of gives 350 00:22:51,000 --> 00:22:54,800 Speaker 1: us one mission in one purpose. Sure, we have specialized training, 351 00:22:55,400 --> 00:22:59,600 Speaker 1: there's ground troops, there's air forces, there's all these different things, 352 00:22:59,600 --> 00:23:03,080 Speaker 1: but pretty much in one mission. When we get out, 353 00:23:03,200 --> 00:23:07,040 Speaker 1: we go from one to many again, and we're not 354 00:23:07,200 --> 00:23:10,840 Speaker 1: prepared for that. And I say, if it takes a 355 00:23:10,840 --> 00:23:14,439 Speaker 1: boot camp to get us ready for that mission, that 356 00:23:14,560 --> 00:23:17,680 Speaker 1: takes a reboot camp to get us ready for our 357 00:23:17,720 --> 00:23:26,600 Speaker 1: lives after and that reboot camp has tools like gratitude, compassion, compassion, 358 00:23:27,520 --> 00:23:33,480 Speaker 1: purpose forgiveness, self forgiveness, and those are tools that we 359 00:23:33,560 --> 00:23:37,160 Speaker 1: really don't know how to use. So what I found, 360 00:23:37,320 --> 00:23:40,280 Speaker 1: and it's not just Bob Taylor digging this stuff out, 361 00:23:40,359 --> 00:23:46,040 Speaker 1: It's really well known that if you start to practice gratitude, 362 00:23:47,000 --> 00:23:49,600 Speaker 1: just looking for things in your life to be happy 363 00:23:49,600 --> 00:23:54,280 Speaker 1: about here in Utah and seeing snow out there and snowboarding, 364 00:23:54,440 --> 00:23:57,800 Speaker 1: I mean, there's there's great things out there to experience 365 00:23:57,840 --> 00:24:01,679 Speaker 1: and to be grateful for. But once you start learning 366 00:24:01,680 --> 00:24:05,760 Speaker 1: how to be grateful, it opens your mind to start 367 00:24:05,800 --> 00:24:09,879 Speaker 1: to see the world in a more positive way. You 368 00:24:09,920 --> 00:24:13,440 Speaker 1: start to see things for why you would be grateful, 369 00:24:14,080 --> 00:24:19,040 Speaker 1: and it's a mind shift that is needed when otherwise 370 00:24:19,480 --> 00:24:23,800 Speaker 1: the world has a lot of suck to it. You know, 371 00:24:23,960 --> 00:24:27,400 Speaker 1: it's it's not hard to find things that are hard 372 00:24:27,440 --> 00:24:30,800 Speaker 1: to deal with, things to get upset about, but we 373 00:24:30,880 --> 00:24:33,200 Speaker 1: can't focus on that. We have to focus on what 374 00:24:33,240 --> 00:24:36,879 Speaker 1: we're grateful for. We have to let things go that 375 00:24:36,920 --> 00:24:40,439 Speaker 1: we hold ourselves accountable for. You know, veterans are really 376 00:24:40,440 --> 00:24:43,880 Speaker 1: hard on themselves. I know I am. You know, we 377 00:24:43,920 --> 00:24:46,560 Speaker 1: hold ourselves accountable for things that you know, hey, I 378 00:24:46,560 --> 00:24:48,720 Speaker 1: should have been there. If I was there, my buddy 379 00:24:48,760 --> 00:24:51,719 Speaker 1: wouldn't have died, or if I would have done something 380 00:24:51,760 --> 00:24:56,880 Speaker 1: different or outcome. And I hear it often, I do, Bob. 381 00:24:56,920 --> 00:25:01,440 Speaker 1: I hear stories and one guy's like my gunny sappy 382 00:25:01,520 --> 00:25:04,119 Speaker 1: plates and then he got shot through that spot, but 383 00:25:04,200 --> 00:25:07,560 Speaker 1: I lived. And it's like, you know, these guys hold 384 00:25:07,720 --> 00:25:11,720 Speaker 1: you hold their holding onto these you know, ansty fate, right, 385 00:25:11,840 --> 00:25:16,119 Speaker 1: and so it's it's holding themselves accountable for something that 386 00:25:16,240 --> 00:25:21,560 Speaker 1: was outside their control. And those examples are what holds 387 00:25:21,600 --> 00:25:27,200 Speaker 1: people into this kind of negative world that they need 388 00:25:27,240 --> 00:25:30,840 Speaker 1: to escape. And I can guarantee you that the person 389 00:25:31,320 --> 00:25:33,920 Speaker 1: that passed on or the person that suffered for that 390 00:25:34,800 --> 00:25:41,119 Speaker 1: absolutely forgives them right and they aren't held accountable, but 391 00:25:41,200 --> 00:25:46,200 Speaker 1: they hold themselves account And so that's what the book does, 392 00:25:46,320 --> 00:25:49,879 Speaker 1: is it walks people through what we're doing that can 393 00:25:50,000 --> 00:25:53,320 Speaker 1: kind of hold us back, and then things that we 394 00:25:53,680 --> 00:25:58,159 Speaker 1: can do to really move ourselves forward. Sounds like some 395 00:25:58,280 --> 00:26:03,280 Speaker 1: good reading, right, and so I mean you wrote it well. 396 00:26:03,320 --> 00:26:07,000 Speaker 1: I what I hope is that not only do people 397 00:26:07,960 --> 00:26:12,920 Speaker 1: read it, but maybe the spouses and the children, you know, 398 00:26:13,040 --> 00:26:15,800 Speaker 1: can can read it along with with dad or with 399 00:26:15,960 --> 00:26:21,200 Speaker 1: brother with son and come to a better understanding of 400 00:26:21,760 --> 00:26:24,520 Speaker 1: what they're going through. Because I wrote it with the 401 00:26:24,560 --> 00:26:28,680 Speaker 1: intention of giving the family members some information as well. Well, 402 00:26:28,680 --> 00:26:32,520 Speaker 1: that's very wholesome. I'm not trying to bring this this 403 00:26:32,560 --> 00:26:35,600 Speaker 1: episode to a very wholesome place, but it is okay. 404 00:26:36,200 --> 00:26:38,919 Speaker 1: There's nothing wrong with you know, reading out loud with 405 00:26:38,960 --> 00:26:42,879 Speaker 1: your kids, you know, especially you know those first second graders, 406 00:26:42,880 --> 00:26:44,800 Speaker 1: read your book, read it with them. You know they'll 407 00:26:44,840 --> 00:26:47,200 Speaker 1: they'll hear you, and that might be a good therapy 408 00:26:47,240 --> 00:26:49,359 Speaker 1: as well, just to read it out loud, you know, 409 00:26:49,520 --> 00:26:52,960 Speaker 1: hearing the word it starts a dialogue, right, And that's 410 00:26:53,000 --> 00:26:55,840 Speaker 1: what That's what the whole purpose of what I'm doing is. 411 00:26:55,960 --> 00:26:58,720 Speaker 1: I'm just trying to get people. If I had shown 412 00:26:58,800 --> 00:27:01,560 Speaker 1: up with pasted on my leg, you and I would 413 00:27:01,560 --> 00:27:03,439 Speaker 1: probably be laughing about how I did it on the 414 00:27:03,560 --> 00:27:07,280 Speaker 1: scale and the story that goes along with it. No 415 00:27:07,359 --> 00:27:10,719 Speaker 1: big deal, right, it's just a broken leg. Well, as 416 00:27:10,720 --> 00:27:15,160 Speaker 1: soon as I start talking about depression irritability PTSD, that's 417 00:27:15,240 --> 00:27:18,880 Speaker 1: not what we talk about. And so all I'm trying 418 00:27:18,920 --> 00:27:22,119 Speaker 1: to do is is do my effort to make it 419 00:27:22,200 --> 00:27:26,919 Speaker 1: a conversation and to talk about the things that we 420 00:27:27,040 --> 00:27:32,360 Speaker 1: don't talk about normally and get us comfortable with it. Well, 421 00:27:32,359 --> 00:27:34,240 Speaker 1: that's the point of this here, you know, we're having 422 00:27:34,240 --> 00:27:39,000 Speaker 1: this conversation to bring awareness to this exact conversation, you know. 423 00:27:39,080 --> 00:27:42,480 Speaker 1: And our listeners out there are probably someone who has 424 00:27:42,720 --> 00:27:45,600 Speaker 1: had MDMA in their life, you know, and or is 425 00:27:45,720 --> 00:27:50,719 Speaker 1: considering that option. Or maybe they're just looking for another 426 00:27:50,760 --> 00:27:54,399 Speaker 1: book to read, and your book will help fill that 427 00:27:54,520 --> 00:27:56,679 Speaker 1: void for them, and then they can glean out of 428 00:27:56,680 --> 00:27:59,320 Speaker 1: that just some information to maybe put an extra pep 429 00:27:59,320 --> 00:28:01,320 Speaker 1: in their spe step as they're walking out the door 430 00:28:01,359 --> 00:28:03,840 Speaker 1: that morning. And that's the boot Camp analogy. It's just 431 00:28:03,880 --> 00:28:05,639 Speaker 1: like you know, that revelie that wakes us all up, 432 00:28:06,040 --> 00:28:11,600 Speaker 1: you know, it's like you're getting up. Never liked that. 433 00:28:11,920 --> 00:28:15,720 Speaker 1: I never liked that. You know. My dad, being an 434 00:28:15,760 --> 00:28:18,680 Speaker 1: SF guy, when I had gotten home, he had this 435 00:28:18,800 --> 00:28:21,240 Speaker 1: alarm that was REVELI and he just blasted it in 436 00:28:21,320 --> 00:28:23,679 Speaker 1: my ear. He got the greatest reaction out of me 437 00:28:23,800 --> 00:28:27,120 Speaker 1: that morning. It was interesting time. I'll tell you what. 438 00:28:27,160 --> 00:28:30,359 Speaker 1: But you know, a little REVELI, but a little REVELI 439 00:28:30,440 --> 00:28:31,960 Speaker 1: puts a pep in your step. I mean, we got 440 00:28:32,040 --> 00:28:34,840 Speaker 1: the day done right. That's how it goes. You know 441 00:28:34,880 --> 00:28:37,119 Speaker 1: that revelis like wake up. They're like, okay, I got 442 00:28:37,160 --> 00:28:40,040 Speaker 1: a shave right now while I'm putting on my underwear. 443 00:28:41,840 --> 00:28:44,680 Speaker 1: Staying focused, and that's that's the mission, and that's the purpose. 444 00:28:44,720 --> 00:28:46,640 Speaker 1: That you feel like you don't have time to really 445 00:28:46,640 --> 00:28:50,720 Speaker 1: think about depression when you have this plotted situation going 446 00:28:50,720 --> 00:28:52,680 Speaker 1: on for you. You know, your instructors like go here, 447 00:28:52,760 --> 00:28:56,120 Speaker 1: go there, stand here, stand there, walk this way, talk 448 00:28:56,200 --> 00:28:59,160 Speaker 1: like this. You're just like doing those things. It's just 449 00:28:59,240 --> 00:29:02,440 Speaker 1: becoming annicle And then when you get out, you're like, 450 00:29:02,480 --> 00:29:08,800 Speaker 1: where's the maintenance guy? Yeah, well, in the military you 451 00:29:08,880 --> 00:29:12,360 Speaker 1: have someone said, someone actually cared that I my shoes 452 00:29:12,360 --> 00:29:16,400 Speaker 1: were shining right, And you know that it's a pain 453 00:29:16,480 --> 00:29:20,400 Speaker 1: in the butt right to have someone on you. But 454 00:29:20,480 --> 00:29:23,280 Speaker 1: at the same time, I think that's part of being 455 00:29:23,320 --> 00:29:26,320 Speaker 1: in a tribe, that's part of being in a family. 456 00:29:26,840 --> 00:29:30,760 Speaker 1: And when we get out, no one's really watching over 457 00:29:30,800 --> 00:29:33,440 Speaker 1: everything that we do. No one's no one really cares 458 00:29:33,480 --> 00:29:37,680 Speaker 1: as much about what you do day to day. Now 459 00:29:37,680 --> 00:29:41,600 Speaker 1: it's up to us, and it's it's a lot more 460 00:29:41,680 --> 00:29:44,920 Speaker 1: lonely than it is when We've got a mission and 461 00:29:44,960 --> 00:29:48,600 Speaker 1: purpose in the military, right, so it's okay to maybe, 462 00:29:48,640 --> 00:29:52,120 Speaker 1: you know, think about another transition while you're in the military. 463 00:29:52,120 --> 00:29:53,840 Speaker 1: You can start thinking, Oh, you know, I always liked 464 00:29:54,120 --> 00:29:56,040 Speaker 1: I think I want to fish in a fish in 465 00:29:56,560 --> 00:29:59,160 Speaker 1: bed and breakfast in Montana. Yeah, that's what I'm gonna 466 00:29:59,160 --> 00:30:02,360 Speaker 1: start doing. Start start thinking about that bed and breakfast. 467 00:30:02,400 --> 00:30:04,160 Speaker 1: You want to open up, you know, because it's like 468 00:30:04,200 --> 00:30:07,360 Speaker 1: complete opposite of the military. Like you hear these dreams. 469 00:30:07,400 --> 00:30:10,320 Speaker 1: I just want to own a fly fishing company, like 470 00:30:10,680 --> 00:30:12,640 Speaker 1: you just want the river. I just want to sit 471 00:30:12,680 --> 00:30:14,120 Speaker 1: there and go ten to two, bro. I just want 472 00:30:14,120 --> 00:30:16,200 Speaker 1: to throw your line out in the water. And that 473 00:30:16,400 --> 00:30:19,200 Speaker 1: is like a good thing, right, getting out in the 474 00:30:19,280 --> 00:30:22,280 Speaker 1: mountains and having a good environment like you talk, I snowboard, 475 00:30:22,320 --> 00:30:25,680 Speaker 1: ice ski, you know, ex absolutely, I go out to 476 00:30:25,880 --> 00:30:31,880 Speaker 1: Montana every year and go out coming and just just 477 00:30:32,600 --> 00:30:40,080 Speaker 1: I mean, I'm preparing for September now, Yeah, backpacking, hiking, 478 00:30:41,160 --> 00:30:45,560 Speaker 1: trying to get in condition, and so that's somewhat of 479 00:30:45,600 --> 00:30:49,360 Speaker 1: my purpose, right, That's part of my mission is to 480 00:30:49,360 --> 00:30:52,320 Speaker 1: get ready for doing something like that. I think we 481 00:30:53,000 --> 00:30:55,800 Speaker 1: have to have something out in front of us that, 482 00:30:56,520 --> 00:30:59,080 Speaker 1: you know, why do we why do we wake up 483 00:30:59,120 --> 00:31:03,280 Speaker 1: in the morning? Right, what's the fire in our belly? 484 00:31:04,040 --> 00:31:06,320 Speaker 1: I used to say that to my son just to 485 00:31:06,360 --> 00:31:09,480 Speaker 1: try and figure out what motivate is, where's the fire 486 00:31:09,520 --> 00:31:14,200 Speaker 1: in your belly? And now he's got it. So how's 487 00:31:14,240 --> 00:31:15,960 Speaker 1: your son right now? Because when he came to you, 488 00:31:16,080 --> 00:31:18,040 Speaker 1: this was a little while ago. How well, how old 489 00:31:18,080 --> 00:31:19,480 Speaker 1: was he when he came to you with this research? 490 00:31:20,000 --> 00:31:23,080 Speaker 1: So this was just a couple of years ago when 491 00:31:23,080 --> 00:31:25,760 Speaker 1: he started working on it. But he does you know, 492 00:31:25,800 --> 00:31:29,440 Speaker 1: he's a documentary filmmaker. I tried to instill in him 493 00:31:30,320 --> 00:31:34,720 Speaker 1: the desire to pursue what it is he wanted. Sure, 494 00:31:34,800 --> 00:31:39,160 Speaker 1: and so he was over in Ukraine doing some film work, 495 00:31:39,600 --> 00:31:44,520 Speaker 1: so right in the front lines, working on humanitarian aid. 496 00:31:44,680 --> 00:31:49,400 Speaker 1: And so it's just nice to be able to see 497 00:31:50,080 --> 00:31:54,400 Speaker 1: someone that you raised being able to experience life with 498 00:31:54,440 --> 00:31:57,920 Speaker 1: the passion that he sees it. Yeah. Right, Because if 499 00:31:57,960 --> 00:31:59,640 Speaker 1: we were talking earlier in the show, it was like 500 00:32:00,120 --> 00:32:02,240 Speaker 1: your daughter was about four and that was like nineteen 501 00:32:02,280 --> 00:32:05,440 Speaker 1: ninety ninety one, and so you know, thirty years later, 502 00:32:07,360 --> 00:32:10,680 Speaker 1: let's flash forward, guys, it's not still four years old today. 503 00:32:12,840 --> 00:32:14,440 Speaker 1: That's why I was like, wait, how your son the 504 00:32:14,520 --> 00:32:17,440 Speaker 1: math starts to Dawn on me. Yeah he's thirty years 505 00:32:17,440 --> 00:32:21,600 Speaker 1: old now, and she's yeah, yeah, not to call you out, daughter, 506 00:32:21,600 --> 00:32:31,040 Speaker 1: But what's up now? What's the plan for you moving forward? 507 00:32:31,120 --> 00:32:33,440 Speaker 1: Where do you see yourself in the next a little while. 508 00:32:33,480 --> 00:32:35,400 Speaker 1: You know, you guys gonna be writing another book, You're 509 00:32:35,400 --> 00:32:38,719 Speaker 1: gonna have some other experience. So well, you know, I was, 510 00:32:38,840 --> 00:32:43,400 Speaker 1: I was kind of telling you the experience after my MDMA. 511 00:32:43,680 --> 00:32:45,760 Speaker 1: It's not just a one and done kind of thing. 512 00:32:46,360 --> 00:32:49,520 Speaker 1: It's not just the treatment then it's over. I've been 513 00:32:49,600 --> 00:32:54,000 Speaker 1: experiencing things too. I've noticed that my mental acuity is 514 00:32:54,000 --> 00:32:59,480 Speaker 1: is better, my creativity is coming back. So I'm experiencing 515 00:32:59,520 --> 00:33:02,960 Speaker 1: a lot of things in a positive way that I 516 00:33:03,000 --> 00:33:08,360 Speaker 1: wasn't able to experience for the last thirty years. So 517 00:33:08,640 --> 00:33:12,920 Speaker 1: right now what I'm doing is I'm I'm working on 518 00:33:12,960 --> 00:33:17,640 Speaker 1: getting the social media kind of built, getting the book 519 00:33:18,000 --> 00:33:22,640 Speaker 1: ready to go and go on speaking tours and book 520 00:33:22,760 --> 00:33:25,880 Speaker 1: signings and things like that. My goal is to get 521 00:33:25,880 --> 00:33:28,720 Speaker 1: this into the hands as many veterans as I possibly can, 522 00:33:29,280 --> 00:33:33,280 Speaker 1: and then, like I said, creating that dialogue people want 523 00:33:33,280 --> 00:33:37,600 Speaker 1: to hear me. I'll share my stories and hopefully people 524 00:33:37,640 --> 00:33:41,720 Speaker 1: get more and more comfortable talking about things like depression 525 00:33:42,280 --> 00:33:47,360 Speaker 1: m DMA. Yeah, you know, spiritual experiences. If you would 526 00:33:47,360 --> 00:33:50,440 Speaker 1: have asked me five years ago if I thought I'd 527 00:33:50,440 --> 00:33:57,120 Speaker 1: be on a podcast talking about my MDMA, You're crazy. Yeah, right, 528 00:33:57,480 --> 00:34:03,360 Speaker 1: well probably, but here we are, and I'm just sitting 529 00:34:03,360 --> 00:34:05,320 Speaker 1: here kind of thinking about it. You know. It's not 530 00:34:05,360 --> 00:34:07,760 Speaker 1: like I just I've never done it, you know, and 531 00:34:07,840 --> 00:34:10,600 Speaker 1: I do have friends who have tried it in my life, 532 00:34:10,640 --> 00:34:13,239 Speaker 1: and I mean, now you're another friend through this that 533 00:34:13,560 --> 00:34:16,120 Speaker 1: has done it and has a positive experience from it. 534 00:34:16,200 --> 00:34:18,400 Speaker 1: And you know, it's not to be confused with some 535 00:34:18,440 --> 00:34:20,040 Speaker 1: of these guys that are going down to Chile or 536 00:34:20,120 --> 00:34:23,480 Speaker 1: Argentina to do like, you know, the ayahuasca. Yeah, she 537 00:34:23,680 --> 00:34:27,080 Speaker 1: did not. She was not. My practitioner was not a 538 00:34:27,120 --> 00:34:31,120 Speaker 1: big fan of ayahuasca. And I'm not going down to 539 00:34:31,160 --> 00:34:36,880 Speaker 1: Peru to someone who knows to experience something that I 540 00:34:36,880 --> 00:34:40,360 Speaker 1: don't know what it is. Yeah right, No, it's a trip. 541 00:34:41,239 --> 00:34:44,359 Speaker 1: So the whole thing is yeah, so I'm don't sign 542 00:34:44,400 --> 00:34:49,480 Speaker 1: me up for that. But this MDMA experience was very clinical. 543 00:34:49,800 --> 00:34:53,600 Speaker 1: You know. I had three pre session meetings, three post 544 00:34:53,600 --> 00:34:56,840 Speaker 1: session meetings, and it was in a very kind of 545 00:34:57,680 --> 00:35:01,040 Speaker 1: relaxing but controlled environment. And it wasn't like going to 546 00:35:01,640 --> 00:35:03,360 Speaker 1: I didn't go down the street and pick up some 547 00:35:03,480 --> 00:35:07,120 Speaker 1: ecstasy and just get to it, and just get to it. 548 00:35:07,480 --> 00:35:10,680 Speaker 1: You know. She set it up so I had a 549 00:35:10,800 --> 00:35:16,799 Speaker 1: very safe experience. Sounds proper, like, you know, like it 550 00:35:17,560 --> 00:35:21,040 Speaker 1: should have somebody maybe people watching, and you're in a 551 00:35:21,120 --> 00:35:24,279 Speaker 1: safe space, and you know it should be something of 552 00:35:24,320 --> 00:35:27,239 Speaker 1: that sort. I think, So, yeah, that's interesting. You know, 553 00:35:27,280 --> 00:35:31,960 Speaker 1: I'm interested. I'm listening. Hey, I guess don't let the 554 00:35:32,000 --> 00:35:34,759 Speaker 1: hair for you, but you know, we don't let my 555 00:35:34,800 --> 00:35:40,640 Speaker 1: hair for you. Right, We're like you put us together, 556 00:35:42,280 --> 00:35:43,560 Speaker 1: but at the end of the day, we could both 557 00:35:43,560 --> 00:35:45,560 Speaker 1: wield an axe. Just fine, you know what I'm saying. 558 00:35:45,600 --> 00:35:48,640 Speaker 1: Look at this together? You know I love it. I 559 00:35:48,719 --> 00:35:50,959 Speaker 1: love it. Now do you still fly? Are you still 560 00:35:50,960 --> 00:35:53,560 Speaker 1: going up in the sky at all? I was a 561 00:35:53,600 --> 00:35:57,120 Speaker 1: pilot for quite a while after I left, but then 562 00:35:57,760 --> 00:36:00,239 Speaker 1: with work, I just don't want to fly. So I 563 00:36:00,280 --> 00:36:02,360 Speaker 1: can be perfect at it, and so it takes a 564 00:36:02,360 --> 00:36:06,320 Speaker 1: lot of time and energy and practice, but I'm actually 565 00:36:06,360 --> 00:36:10,239 Speaker 1: thinking about getting back into it. Alott kind of cleansing 566 00:36:10,640 --> 00:36:15,359 Speaker 1: these pharmaceuticals out of my body, and that's right, kind 567 00:36:15,360 --> 00:36:18,799 Speaker 1: of getting my mental clarity back. I'm thinking about doing 568 00:36:18,840 --> 00:36:23,279 Speaker 1: some more flying hitting that stick. Yeah h yeah, that's right. 569 00:36:23,680 --> 00:36:26,400 Speaker 1: Fly some Star Wars canyons or something with some trainers 570 00:36:26,680 --> 00:36:30,840 Speaker 1: go down in that area. Never was quite the fighter 571 00:36:31,360 --> 00:36:33,960 Speaker 1: kind of guy doing all the aerial maneuvers, but I 572 00:36:34,040 --> 00:36:38,000 Speaker 1: like going from point to point B yeah, you know. 573 00:36:38,040 --> 00:36:40,040 Speaker 1: And when I got your info and I was reading 574 00:36:40,120 --> 00:36:42,320 Speaker 1: up on you and that talked about flights and combats, 575 00:36:42,320 --> 00:36:44,080 Speaker 1: I was thinking, you know, oh, maybe f sixteens. I 576 00:36:44,120 --> 00:36:46,680 Speaker 1: was like, what aircraft was kind of roaming around the 577 00:36:46,680 --> 00:36:49,799 Speaker 1: skies of you know, desert storm. And then and then 578 00:36:49,840 --> 00:36:51,480 Speaker 1: when you say be fifty twos, I was just like, 579 00:36:51,640 --> 00:36:55,160 Speaker 1: I've that's so incredibly awesome. I've been on one before, 580 00:36:55,280 --> 00:36:57,200 Speaker 1: only at Hill Air Force Base when I was a 581 00:36:57,239 --> 00:36:59,440 Speaker 1: young man. Dad's like, let's go to the air show. 582 00:36:59,480 --> 00:37:01,200 Speaker 1: But and I think that I don't know, if there's 583 00:37:01,200 --> 00:37:03,719 Speaker 1: one up there right now at the airfield, it could 584 00:37:03,719 --> 00:37:06,839 Speaker 1: be that's a big you know. I got into the 585 00:37:06,880 --> 00:37:09,280 Speaker 1: first one I got into was at an air show 586 00:37:09,560 --> 00:37:12,600 Speaker 1: and I had already chosen to go into B fifty twos. 587 00:37:12,880 --> 00:37:16,600 Speaker 1: Oh wow. And I climbed up inside and I thought, man, 588 00:37:16,600 --> 00:37:19,279 Speaker 1: this looks like Fred and Berney Rubble doing this thing. 589 00:37:19,480 --> 00:37:23,640 Speaker 1: It was just ancient, and uh, the yolks look like 590 00:37:23,920 --> 00:37:27,520 Speaker 1: some analyt nod on it. I thought, oh my god, 591 00:37:27,600 --> 00:37:30,839 Speaker 1: what have I done. I'm just I'm going into this 592 00:37:30,960 --> 00:37:34,279 Speaker 1: ancient beast. When we got into training, when you turn 593 00:37:34,320 --> 00:37:37,600 Speaker 1: the power on in those things, it's the most advanced avionics, 594 00:37:38,640 --> 00:37:43,760 Speaker 1: uh in the Air Force. So I was very happy 595 00:37:43,800 --> 00:37:46,920 Speaker 1: with my mission. That's very cool, very cool. Now the 596 00:37:47,080 --> 00:37:54,439 Speaker 1: B fifty two, it was it around in fifty fifty seven. Yeah, 597 00:37:54,640 --> 00:38:00,600 Speaker 1: so aircraft that we're older than. I yeah, really really 598 00:38:00,640 --> 00:38:04,560 Speaker 1: really that's and you think about it, that SR seventy 599 00:38:04,600 --> 00:38:12,840 Speaker 1: one it's gone. The one seventeens or the seventeens, some 600 00:38:12,960 --> 00:38:16,239 Speaker 1: of these planes come and go at the fifty two 601 00:38:16,320 --> 00:38:19,120 Speaker 1: is probably gonna be around for another thirty forty years. 602 00:38:19,880 --> 00:38:21,560 Speaker 1: I have to say, you know, when I was about 603 00:38:21,600 --> 00:38:24,480 Speaker 1: twelve years old is when you were probably flying that 604 00:38:24,520 --> 00:38:27,239 Speaker 1: mission that you talked about over wherever it was you 605 00:38:27,280 --> 00:38:30,080 Speaker 1: were flying. And I I had a little black and 606 00:38:30,080 --> 00:38:32,960 Speaker 1: white TV that I was able to like keep a 607 00:38:33,320 --> 00:38:36,040 Speaker 1: radio Antanna stickers on it at skateboard stickers, and I 608 00:38:36,040 --> 00:38:38,400 Speaker 1: could just get one or two channels and it was 609 00:38:38,440 --> 00:38:39,960 Speaker 1: the news. It was like two in the morning and 610 00:38:40,000 --> 00:38:42,560 Speaker 1: it was Baghdad in Iraq and it was the whole 611 00:38:42,640 --> 00:38:45,680 Speaker 1: desert storm. Couldn't stop watching it. All I could see 612 00:38:45,760 --> 00:38:47,640 Speaker 1: is that triple A that they'd have the footage of 613 00:38:48,000 --> 00:38:51,000 Speaker 1: anti aircraft artillery is TRIPLEA for those that may not 614 00:38:51,120 --> 00:38:53,200 Speaker 1: know that, I think, correct me if I'm wrong by 615 00:38:53,200 --> 00:38:56,200 Speaker 1: comedy below. But and through night vision you just see 616 00:38:56,239 --> 00:38:58,680 Speaker 1: these tracer rounds just going straight up through the sky. 617 00:38:58,920 --> 00:39:01,920 Speaker 1: So when you're explaining that, I'm thinking about little Rad 618 00:39:02,320 --> 00:39:06,200 Speaker 1: twelve years old watching them shoot up through you know 619 00:39:06,400 --> 00:39:12,040 Speaker 1: from the footage and you're flying over that, that's you, 620 00:39:12,040 --> 00:39:14,880 Speaker 1: you know, in those tracer rounds. Those are only like 621 00:39:15,320 --> 00:39:20,680 Speaker 1: every seventh show round as a tracer, right, So and 622 00:39:21,120 --> 00:39:24,200 Speaker 1: some of these were one hundred and twenty millimeter rounds 623 00:39:24,600 --> 00:39:29,280 Speaker 1: that they were thrown up into voice Yeah like a pencil. 624 00:39:30,120 --> 00:39:34,279 Speaker 1: Well yeah, dude, those are big. Yeah, yeah, those are 625 00:39:34,320 --> 00:39:36,480 Speaker 1: big boy round wise but like long wise yeah how 626 00:39:36,520 --> 00:39:39,160 Speaker 1: long is that? Yeah? I don't yeah, probably like those 627 00:39:39,200 --> 00:39:43,520 Speaker 1: Howardzer kind of size. Yeah. They're coming at you, dude, Yeah, 628 00:39:43,680 --> 00:39:46,600 Speaker 1: like at Memphis bell right, but they're gonna get the 629 00:39:46,640 --> 00:39:50,760 Speaker 1: Golden Baby, so we um they threw away a bunch 630 00:39:50,760 --> 00:39:55,520 Speaker 1: of Vietnam era flat jackets on the island on Diego, Garcia, 631 00:39:55,560 --> 00:39:57,880 Speaker 1: and so we were, you know, we drove up and 632 00:39:57,920 --> 00:40:01,000 Speaker 1: we were grabbing those out of the trash and packing 633 00:40:01,040 --> 00:40:03,920 Speaker 1: those into the you know, the side of the aircraft, 634 00:40:04,000 --> 00:40:06,279 Speaker 1: thinking that that would have if one of those one 635 00:40:06,400 --> 00:40:09,520 Speaker 1: twenties would have come through or shrapnel from it outside 636 00:40:09,840 --> 00:40:14,560 Speaker 1: through the piece. It's like we were toasts. Yeah, well, 637 00:40:14,760 --> 00:40:16,960 Speaker 1: I'm glad that you were able to pull through and 638 00:40:17,239 --> 00:40:20,799 Speaker 1: do your mission well. And congratulations to your success with 639 00:40:21,000 --> 00:40:24,400 Speaker 1: your book that's coming out, and you know, with finding 640 00:40:24,400 --> 00:40:27,279 Speaker 1: your inner self and good luck to everything with your 641 00:40:27,320 --> 00:40:30,240 Speaker 1: family and your son's documentaries and going into the front 642 00:40:30,280 --> 00:40:33,000 Speaker 1: like that with the You know that I've really enjoyed 643 00:40:33,040 --> 00:40:37,560 Speaker 1: our conversation. It's been a lot of fun and hopefully 644 00:40:37,560 --> 00:40:41,880 Speaker 1: it works with your audience. And yeah, just you know, 645 00:40:41,960 --> 00:40:45,920 Speaker 1: maybe someone along the way lost start a conversation or 646 00:40:46,080 --> 00:40:50,399 Speaker 1: read my book, or find a way to help someone else. Yeah, 647 00:40:50,640 --> 00:40:53,920 Speaker 1: I completely agree. And you know, the boy Scouts have 648 00:40:54,000 --> 00:40:56,359 Speaker 1: a motto and it's do a good turn daily, and 649 00:40:56,400 --> 00:40:58,560 Speaker 1: so you know, if everybody can just kind of do 650 00:40:58,600 --> 00:41:01,239 Speaker 1: a good turn daily, think about you know, maybe picking 651 00:41:01,280 --> 00:41:03,080 Speaker 1: something up off the floor at your house if you're 652 00:41:03,239 --> 00:41:05,680 Speaker 1: coming in the door, or just the little things. It's 653 00:41:05,680 --> 00:41:07,960 Speaker 1: the little things. One time, just real quick before we go, 654 00:41:08,160 --> 00:41:11,319 Speaker 1: I cleaned the bathroom sink around the sink and just 655 00:41:11,400 --> 00:41:13,719 Speaker 1: did that. And my wife came home and just said, 656 00:41:15,080 --> 00:41:17,880 Speaker 1: like she noticed that. That was a big deal. She's like, 657 00:41:17,920 --> 00:41:20,279 Speaker 1: I noticed that, and she let me know she noticed that. 658 00:41:21,200 --> 00:41:27,359 Speaker 1: So you know, I keep that clean. You know, I'm 659 00:41:27,360 --> 00:41:29,680 Speaker 1: just saying, it's the little things. So thanks for being 660 00:41:29,680 --> 00:41:32,719 Speaker 1: a part of the Soft Rep Show. I really have 661 00:41:32,800 --> 00:41:35,640 Speaker 1: a great opportunity to talk to guests like yourself, Bob 662 00:41:35,680 --> 00:41:38,680 Speaker 1: and connect and then bring you to my listener and 663 00:41:39,120 --> 00:41:42,600 Speaker 1: whoever's watching. So again, tell me the name of your book, 664 00:41:43,160 --> 00:41:46,200 Speaker 1: from Service to Success and that comes out in May 665 00:41:46,239 --> 00:41:47,880 Speaker 1: and we'll be able to find it out then. And 666 00:41:47,920 --> 00:41:52,080 Speaker 1: then the Patriot Promise dot org right correct, you can 667 00:41:52,120 --> 00:41:56,759 Speaker 1: go there, follow Facebook the Patriot Promise and go to 668 00:41:56,840 --> 00:42:01,040 Speaker 1: Patriot Promise dot org. Either buy a bookmaically donate one 669 00:42:01,160 --> 00:42:03,759 Speaker 1: or donate five or ten, and we'll make sure we 670 00:42:03,800 --> 00:42:06,120 Speaker 1: get them to as many vets as we can. I 671 00:42:06,160 --> 00:42:08,759 Speaker 1: don't make any money on any of the sales that 672 00:42:08,840 --> 00:42:12,800 Speaker 1: go through Patriot Promise that org. Everything is going towards 673 00:42:13,239 --> 00:42:16,120 Speaker 1: books to vets and sustaining the books to keep them 674 00:42:16,120 --> 00:42:18,279 Speaker 1: going so that you can keep the program going. That's 675 00:42:18,400 --> 00:42:21,560 Speaker 1: very commendable. I would say, do you have an Instagram? Also? 676 00:42:21,600 --> 00:42:26,399 Speaker 1: Are you gonna just all of that? Ye? Okay, So 677 00:42:26,480 --> 00:42:28,920 Speaker 1: check out Patriot Promise and we'll have a link and 678 00:42:29,080 --> 00:42:31,880 Speaker 1: some other stuff in the comments, you know, so if 679 00:42:31,920 --> 00:42:33,960 Speaker 1: any of our readers are reading it, or if you 680 00:42:34,000 --> 00:42:35,719 Speaker 1: want to go and have a quick reference, you can 681 00:42:35,719 --> 00:42:38,000 Speaker 1: just tap on the links in the in the video 682 00:42:38,080 --> 00:42:39,960 Speaker 1: at the bottom. And I just want to say thank 683 00:42:40,000 --> 00:42:44,480 Speaker 1: you again to Bob Taylor for joining us. And you 684 00:42:44,520 --> 00:42:53,760 Speaker 1: know from all of your software you have a wonderful day. 685 00:42:54,920 --> 00:42:57,319 Speaker 1: You've been listening to self recreating