WEBVTT - Civic Cipher 052822 Talking to Our Children About Mass Shootings (Part 1)

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<v Speaker 1>Welcome to another episode of Sivig Cipher. I'm your host,

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<v Speaker 1>ramses Joh I go by the name Q. You can

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<v Speaker 1>call me Q. Yes, indeed, and uh, we've got a

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<v Speaker 1>heavy show. I think it was expected. We've got a

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<v Speaker 1>lot to talk about, so stick around.

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<v Speaker 2>UH.

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<v Speaker 1>As you know, we were discussing the attack in Buffalo

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<v Speaker 1>as our last recording, and this past week it was

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<v Speaker 1>obviously a much widely covered UH mass shooting in Texas.

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<v Speaker 1>Nineteen children at last count lives are quite short and

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<v Speaker 1>so we have to talk about that. And it's been

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<v Speaker 1>a difficult month, but we've done our best to try

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<v Speaker 1>to cover everything, and we still wanted to make sure

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<v Speaker 1>that we honored our Asian American and Pacific Islander brothers

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<v Speaker 1>and sisters for their History month and the heritage man

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<v Speaker 1>I should say. And so we have a lot to

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<v Speaker 1>cover in this episode, and we're going to try to

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<v Speaker 1>do it all and be true to it all. And

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<v Speaker 1>so again, a lot to stick around for. I can't

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<v Speaker 1>promise it's going to be easy. I know that at

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<v Speaker 1>least we've around here. We've been we haven't had any

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<v Speaker 1>conversations about the goings on in the news. We've obviously

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<v Speaker 1>sent a lot of stuff to our group chat and

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<v Speaker 1>our show producer, Maggie A ka Maggie B. Knowing has

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<v Speaker 1>kind of pointed us in this direction, which we knew

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<v Speaker 1>we'd have to we'd have to do the show. But

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<v Speaker 1>we're going to be strong for you. We've been holding

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<v Speaker 1>onto this all week and hopefully we'll be able to

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<v Speaker 1>do right by everyone. So first and foremost, let's get

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<v Speaker 1>into some ebony excellence. How do you feel about that?

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<v Speaker 1>Que asking me how I feel today? Probably not going

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<v Speaker 1>to be your best. Well, we still want to celebrate.

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<v Speaker 1>So today we're going to talk about the first black

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<v Speaker 1>female architect to earn a doctor from the University of

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<v Speaker 1>Hawaii at Manoa and how she aims to diversify the industry.

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<v Speaker 1>Danielle mcleve is the first black woman turn a Doctor

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<v Speaker 1>of Architecture professional degree. Her degree serves as a milestone

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<v Speaker 1>within the industry where black people make up just two

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<v Speaker 1>percent of one hundred and six and forty two licensed

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<v Speaker 1>architects and black women represent only zero point four percent,

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<v Speaker 1>So the school notes, with her degree, she's looking forward

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<v Speaker 1>to diversifying the industry and inspiring more black women to

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<v Speaker 1>enter the field. This is a direct quote from her

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<v Speaker 1>When I first found out I would be the first

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<v Speaker 1>black woman to attain this degree, I was hit with

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<v Speaker 1>a variety of emotions. I was excited to be in

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<v Speaker 1>this position of trailblazing, and I knew it would be

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<v Speaker 1>encouraging for other Black women looking to get into design.

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<v Speaker 1>Mcleeve received her bachelor's in sculpture and painting from Belmont

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<v Speaker 1>University in Nashville, Tennessee, before attending U H Manoah. M

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<v Speaker 1>cleve won the Hawaii Architectural Foundation Ward for her thesis

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<v Speaker 1>on housing titled Redesigning the Hood using Culturally Aware Wellness

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<v Speaker 1>as a Tool to inform Architectural design. While on the

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<v Speaker 1>doctorate programs, she stressed the need for more equitable housing

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<v Speaker 1>and culturally aware design practices in architecture. I just want

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<v Speaker 1>to make a note that our show producer Ms. Maggie

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<v Speaker 1>aka Maggie b Noan, she's a big fan of this

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<v Speaker 1>woman right here, So she sent a story over from

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<v Speaker 1>Black Enterprise so that we could again shout out Danielle mcleve.

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<v Speaker 1>Now we'll be honest with you. We record the show

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<v Speaker 1>sometime during the week and it airs on most stations

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<v Speaker 1>over the weekend. I know It's not normal to show

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<v Speaker 1>behind the curtains when we're producing a show like that,

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<v Speaker 1>but that is the way that most shows work. Hours included.

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<v Speaker 1>So you might be hearing this well after we've recorded

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<v Speaker 1>and in the days since we've recorded it. In the

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<v Speaker 1>day that you're hearing it, maybe there are new things

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<v Speaker 1>that have happened. But we are going to discuss the

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<v Speaker 1>world as we see it, as we feel it right now.

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<v Speaker 1>As you may know, nineteen children were killed one day

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<v Speaker 1>at school last week, Tuesday of last week, and there

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<v Speaker 1>were two teachers killed as well. This was because of

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<v Speaker 1>a mass shooter and a city called Gouvalde, Texas. I

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<v Speaker 1>believe that's how it's pronounced. And you know, we've had

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<v Speaker 1>this conversation on the show before. You know guns, you

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<v Speaker 1>know this is this is a black show, decidedly black space.

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<v Speaker 1>Guns have been something that has plagued our community specifically,

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<v Speaker 1>and so we have lots of conversations that involve guns

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<v Speaker 1>and the use of guns and the use of guns

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<v Speaker 1>against black people, and that's sort of done. Less frequent, however,

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<v Speaker 1>is the discussion about guns in general. But we have

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<v Speaker 1>had these conversations here as well. Q is famously I

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<v Speaker 1>wouldn't I guess anti gun, but a gun owner, and

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<v Speaker 1>I am just anti gun full stop. And those conversations

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<v Speaker 1>I believe are necessary for us to really find our

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<v Speaker 1>way through who we are, who we want to be,

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<v Speaker 1>what's necessary, and how to protect ourselves in this country.

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<v Speaker 1>Different philosophies, But this show is so that we can

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<v Speaker 1>have those conversations. So it's good that you know Q

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<v Speaker 1>feels the way he feels and that I feel the

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<v Speaker 1>way that I feel, because I believe that between the

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<v Speaker 1>two of us, we represent a good majority of the

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<v Speaker 1>way people feel around the country. So you might hear

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<v Speaker 1>your opinions somewhere in the conversations that we have had

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<v Speaker 1>and perhaps we'll have. And this conversation is that we

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<v Speaker 1>found out that the shooter was a Hispanic person. The

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<v Speaker 1>attack was on a primarily Hispanic community, and so the

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<v Speaker 1>racial component is a little different this time, but the

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<v Speaker 1>gun component is one that is very familiar. You know,

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<v Speaker 1>Q comes from Detroit, impoverished community seven Mile to be specific,

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<v Speaker 1>and guns were a part of his everyday life growing up.

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<v Speaker 1>You know, poor people struggling to get by, you know

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<v Speaker 1>economic inequalities. You know, you get people that are scraping

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<v Speaker 1>to get by, and some people even turn to crime,

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<v Speaker 1>and some of those crimes include robberies. I'm from Compton, California,

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<v Speaker 1>so it's no stranger to me as well. But in

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<v Speaker 1>the years since we've grown up, we've seen mass shootings

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<v Speaker 1>over and over and over again. We were both in

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<v Speaker 1>high school when Columbine happened, and it's it's been like

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<v Speaker 1>a runaway train ever since then, and of course more

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<v Speaker 1>in recent years it's been even more so. So I

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<v Speaker 1>want to stop right there because I want Q two

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<v Speaker 1>chime in, because I know you have a lot on

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<v Speaker 1>your mind. So Ramses.

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<v Speaker 2>That you are behind the curtain with regards to the

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<v Speaker 2>wind and the house when it comes to producing our

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<v Speaker 2>show and when it airs to you now as a

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<v Speaker 2>continent professional. Snapping back into professional mode, Ramses then said

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<v Speaker 2>that this shooting happened last week. This shooting happened yesterday

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<v Speaker 2>as of the time we record the show, So I

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<v Speaker 2>need that to kind of settle in with people for

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<v Speaker 2>a second, and just also said the racial component was

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<v Speaker 2>a little different this time because the shooter was Hispanic,

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<v Speaker 2>in the community where the shooting happened was as well.

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<v Speaker 2>I would challenge that the racial component was the same

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<v Speaker 2>as always. This time the shooter was a member of

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<v Speaker 2>a minority. This shooter was not arrested, apprehended, and provided

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<v Speaker 2>a day in court. The shooter was murdered on the scene,

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<v Speaker 2>as what typically happened when the shooter looks more like

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<v Speaker 2>us and less like the people apprehending. I grew up

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<v Speaker 2>in Detroit, Michigan. At some point between me graduating from

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<v Speaker 2>high school and today, my hometown was the murder capital

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<v Speaker 2>of the United States, maybe even of the world at

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<v Speaker 2>one point, and that was never something to be proud of.

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<v Speaker 1>But I also.

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<v Speaker 2>Walked to and from school every day. There were gangs,

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<v Speaker 2>there was violence, but at least at school. I never

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<v Speaker 2>for a second imagined someone would enter that school and

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<v Speaker 2>possibly murder me and my classmates, no matter how impoverished,

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<v Speaker 2>no matter how much crime, no matter what our daily

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<v Speaker 2>realities were. Since Columbine, as Ramses pointed out, issues of

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<v Speaker 2>rampant gun violence and specifically mass shootings of people in

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<v Speaker 2>public places, public places once thought to be the safest

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<v Speaker 2>of spaces for people of all backgrounds, colors, ethnicities, and religions, church,

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<v Speaker 2>the grocery store, and school. In the wake of these things,

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<v Speaker 2>we fall into a very very exhausting cycle. At this point,

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<v Speaker 2>because it's so repetitive and it's so predictable, a lot

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<v Speaker 2>of people are going to be very, very publicly and.

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<v Speaker 1>Aggressively upset. Over these next few days.

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<v Speaker 2>All of our social media stories and feeds will look

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<v Speaker 2>the same. Everyone will actually pretend to be outraged by it.

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<v Speaker 2>The NRA put out a statement today. The words as

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<v Speaker 2>we gather are in the statement right, very very much

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<v Speaker 2>business as usual for these people, their performative grief, their

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<v Speaker 2>performative sorrow, their thoughts and prayers. In a cycle. Those

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<v Speaker 2>of us who do not have power will let everyone

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<v Speaker 2>know how upset we are, and those that do have

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<v Speaker 2>the power to make changes will very predictably do nothing.

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<v Speaker 2>So this is me as an adult, as someone who

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<v Speaker 2>pays taxes and votes and is very very involved in

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<v Speaker 2>the civics of the city, state, and country that he

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<v Speaker 2>lives in. I vote in every election, not just the president.

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<v Speaker 2>Pay attention to who I'm voting for and why. I

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<v Speaker 2>do not predetermine those things before the election start. I

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<v Speaker 2>do not vote in uniformity with a certain group just

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<v Speaker 2>because that's what I'm supposed to do. However, there is

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<v Speaker 2>a group that I can say without blinking that I

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<v Speaker 2>refuse to vote for because they've shown me just how

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<v Speaker 2>much me and people like me mean to them at

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<v Speaker 2>some point, the Republican Party in this country. Okay, I'm

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<v Speaker 2>going to stop now because I was about to say

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<v Speaker 2>something very very hopeful and something that I know it's

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<v Speaker 2>not going to happen. So I don't even want to

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<v Speaker 2>pretend for our listeners that they'll be called out for

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<v Speaker 2>what they're doing and that they'll take any.

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<v Speaker 1>Accountability for it. I think I forget his name is

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<v Speaker 1>I want to say Steve Kerr. Steve Kerr, the head

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<v Speaker 1>coach for the Golden State Wards. Yeah, he has a

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<v Speaker 1>video that has gone viral and he spoke on the

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<v Speaker 1>state of politics, and he named some Republican representatives specifically

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<v Speaker 1>and kind of hung this most recent tragedy on the

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<v Speaker 1>heads of those people. Now here's the thing, not singularly

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<v Speaker 1>this tragedy. Though.

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<v Speaker 2>We haven't finished talking about Buffalo like that's yeah. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>we haven't spent much time morning or trying to reconcile

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<v Speaker 2>what just happened. Here we are again, and it's not

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<v Speaker 2>just optics. These people say how they feel out loud.

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<v Speaker 2>People who feel the same go out and carry out

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<v Speaker 2>these very very scary retribution acts with assault rifles, killing innocence,

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<v Speaker 2>and then we just get back to the status quo

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<v Speaker 2>of whatever we were going to do that day. So,

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<v Speaker 2>speaking of getting back to the status quo, because today

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<v Speaker 2>is Wednesday that we're recording this episode, it was the

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<v Speaker 2>last day of school for my sons. I have two sons,

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<v Speaker 2>and like many of you, I was worried because again,

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<v Speaker 2>this thing hangs over your head when you take your

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<v Speaker 2>child to school. When Sandy Hook happened my older son,

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<v Speaker 2>I left the radio station and I went picked up

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<v Speaker 2>my son and we went to Toys r Us. I'll

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<v Speaker 2>never forget that day. I went, I got my baby

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<v Speaker 2>out of school.

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<v Speaker 1>I didn't know what was going on, but but yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>today business as usual. So one of the things that

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<v Speaker 1>I didn't do was talk to my son about what

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<v Speaker 1>happened yesterday. And everyone at his school was fine. He

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<v Speaker 1>was let out of school, and I brought him with

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<v Speaker 1>me to the studio. So he's sitting here and he's

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<v Speaker 1>on the mic, say hi, baby, Hello. So I don't

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<v Speaker 1>know what I'm about to say, but I know that

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<v Speaker 1>if you're a parent, that you may appreciate the conversation

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<v Speaker 1>that I'm going to have with my son and that

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<v Speaker 1>his uncle is going to have with his nephew. So

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<v Speaker 1>here we go. Then, do you know that sometimes people

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<v Speaker 1>go into schools with guns and they shoot little kids? Yeah, okay,

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<v Speaker 1>that's a real thing that happens. And you know, little

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<v Speaker 1>kids are so little that a lot of times they

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<v Speaker 1>don't survive and they don't know what to do. It's

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<v Speaker 1>very scary. And you know, little kids don't run as

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<v Speaker 1>fast as grown ups, you know. And you know, your

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<v Speaker 1>mom and I we have you in a really good

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<v Speaker 1>school in a really good area, and it's not the

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<v Speaker 1>sort of thing that we want to worry about. But

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<v Speaker 1>I guess before anything else, I need you to know

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<v Speaker 1>that I love you, and your mom loves you, and

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<v Speaker 1>your brother loves you. Okay, and I can't be with

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<v Speaker 1>you all the time because that's just not the way

0:18:21.280 --> 0:18:27.359
<v Speaker 1>that things work. But I don't I know this is

0:18:27.440 --> 0:18:29.600
<v Speaker 1>kind of advanced for you, But I don't want you

0:18:29.680 --> 0:18:34.880
<v Speaker 1>to ever think that I'm gambling with your life by

0:18:34.920 --> 0:18:39.160
<v Speaker 1>taking you to school, because that's not what I'm doing.

0:18:41.040 --> 0:18:44.600
<v Speaker 1>You deserve to have a childhood. You deserve to go

0:18:44.640 --> 0:18:48.440
<v Speaker 1>and make friends and play. You deserve to learn at

0:18:48.440 --> 0:18:51.760
<v Speaker 1>a school with the way most of us do, and

0:18:52.000 --> 0:18:54.280
<v Speaker 1>you deserve to not to have to live in fear.

0:19:06.920 --> 0:19:13.960
<v Speaker 1>Give me a second, anything you got cute.

0:19:14.240 --> 0:19:20.240
<v Speaker 2>I cannot pretend to be prepared to have this conversation

0:19:20.400 --> 0:19:23.800
<v Speaker 2>with my nephew or with my son. Yeah, he's going

0:19:23.840 --> 0:19:28.160
<v Speaker 2>next year. He turns five. That's fall, so yeah, dropping

0:19:28.200 --> 0:19:33.879
<v Speaker 2>him off at school thing starts next year. For the

0:19:33.960 --> 0:19:38.280
<v Speaker 2>kids who were killed in Texas, the last day of

0:19:38.320 --> 0:19:44.120
<v Speaker 2>school is tomorrow. For many of those kids, I'd imagine

0:19:44.119 --> 0:19:48.359
<v Speaker 2>the last day of school was yesterday, just because what

0:19:48.520 --> 0:19:51.320
<v Speaker 2>parent wants to send their kid back to that school again.

0:19:51.520 --> 0:19:59.199
<v Speaker 2>After that, it was almost hard for me to decide

0:20:00.119 --> 0:20:02.240
<v Speaker 2>seconds ago that I was going to finish the show today,

0:20:04.040 --> 0:20:08.800
<v Speaker 2>because my nephew answered honestly the first question you asked

0:20:08.880 --> 0:20:13.520
<v Speaker 2>him in the way that he absolutely should have. No, Dad,

0:20:14.760 --> 0:20:18.960
<v Speaker 2>I don't know that little kids get shot and killed

0:20:19.000 --> 0:20:23.360
<v Speaker 2>at school. That's the type of thought that should never

0:20:23.520 --> 0:20:26.879
<v Speaker 2>have to cross his mind. And the fact that we

0:20:27.040 --> 0:20:32.200
<v Speaker 2>have to weigh if we're being irresponsible by not having

0:20:32.280 --> 0:20:36.720
<v Speaker 2>this conversation or we're doing him a disservice by removing

0:20:36.760 --> 0:20:46.639
<v Speaker 2>that innocence, and that Naiven take from him. It's as

0:20:46.720 --> 0:20:49.680
<v Speaker 2>bad as having to decide, you know, on rent or groceries.

0:20:49.720 --> 0:20:51.560
<v Speaker 2>It's the type of choices that we should never have

0:20:51.680 --> 0:20:54.679
<v Speaker 2>to make. We shouldn't be trying to figure out whether

0:20:54.800 --> 0:20:59.320
<v Speaker 2>or not he should be more informed so he can

0:20:59.359 --> 0:21:03.920
<v Speaker 2>be careful, but that might lead to him being scared

0:21:06.000 --> 0:21:09.000
<v Speaker 2>and not taking advantage of the time where he's at

0:21:09.000 --> 0:21:11.840
<v Speaker 2>school and should be learning and soaking up information, instead

0:21:11.880 --> 0:21:14.000
<v Speaker 2>of looking over his left and right shoulder to know

0:21:14.760 --> 0:21:16.560
<v Speaker 2>if it's safe to be sitting in the seat that

0:21:16.640 --> 0:21:21.119
<v Speaker 2>he's in. The type of trauma that could cause PTSD

0:21:21.200 --> 0:21:23.200
<v Speaker 2>in a kid where he hears a door slam loud

0:21:23.200 --> 0:21:25.680
<v Speaker 2>and now he's scared because that might have been something else.

0:21:30.960 --> 0:21:35.800
<v Speaker 2>I cannot pretend that I was even almost prepared to

0:21:35.880 --> 0:21:38.439
<v Speaker 2>have that conversation with him, or with your nephew.

0:21:40.680 --> 0:21:42.879
<v Speaker 1>But we are fathers, we are head of household.

0:21:43.080 --> 0:21:47.600
<v Speaker 2>We do have to weigh if we're doing our children

0:21:47.600 --> 0:21:51.120
<v Speaker 2>a disservice by not having them prepared for this very very,

0:21:51.240 --> 0:21:53.919
<v Speaker 2>very difficult and scary place they have to grow up in,

0:21:55.240 --> 0:21:58.440
<v Speaker 2>one that we thought when we were their age, and

0:21:58.560 --> 0:22:01.199
<v Speaker 2>by the time we got to a point where we

0:22:01.280 --> 0:22:04.240
<v Speaker 2>had kids their age would be a much different place

0:22:04.280 --> 0:22:08.600
<v Speaker 2>than it is. I want to say it's very much

0:22:08.640 --> 0:22:10.879
<v Speaker 2>the same, but in some cases it's worse off. We

0:22:10.920 --> 0:22:15.359
<v Speaker 2>have access to far more information now, and even with

0:22:15.480 --> 0:22:19.640
<v Speaker 2>that information, we are making informed decisions against our own

0:22:19.800 --> 0:22:23.359
<v Speaker 2>personal quality of life best interest in the name of

0:22:23.440 --> 0:22:27.400
<v Speaker 2>As we've said many times on this show, capitalism profit

0:22:27.680 --> 0:22:31.720
<v Speaker 2>over everything, even the lives of our babies.

0:22:35.040 --> 0:22:43.480
<v Speaker 1>And this is why Steve Curry said the name Mitch McConnell.

0:22:43.680 --> 0:22:46.640
<v Speaker 1>That man is the reason why I have to have

0:22:46.680 --> 0:22:51.160
<v Speaker 1>a conversation with my son, and I have to explain

0:22:51.280 --> 0:22:55.120
<v Speaker 1>to my son. If you hear anything, I don't care

0:22:55.160 --> 0:23:01.120
<v Speaker 1>if it's a loudo or slam son, you run as

0:23:01.160 --> 0:23:11.520
<v Speaker 1>far and as fast as you can. You be smart.

0:23:11.640 --> 0:23:15.160
<v Speaker 1>I don't know whether or not hiding is the right thing.

0:23:16.720 --> 0:23:20.200
<v Speaker 1>I don't know if you just keep running, but if

0:23:20.200 --> 0:23:28.800
<v Speaker 1>that happens to you, you just survive. Okay, baby, Okay?

0:23:32.200 --> 0:23:35.560
<v Speaker 1>What grade are you going into? Second grade? How old

0:23:35.600 --> 0:23:41.199
<v Speaker 1>are you? Seven? And let everyone know what your name is?

0:23:42.640 --> 0:23:57.280
<v Speaker 1>I don't know. Ayah. So that's the conversation I had

0:23:57.320 --> 0:23:59.960
<v Speaker 1>to have with my son. I'm not going to pret

0:24:00.320 --> 0:24:04.000
<v Speaker 1>like I didn't have the same conversation with my older son, Christian,

0:24:06.040 --> 0:24:08.240
<v Speaker 1>there was a I think it might have been the

0:24:08.280 --> 0:24:13.000
<v Speaker 1>Parkland shooting in Florida, and I had to take him

0:24:13.000 --> 0:24:21.080
<v Speaker 1>to school, and this is not who I am, but

0:24:21.280 --> 0:24:22.840
<v Speaker 1>you know, I mentioned on the show that my father

0:24:22.920 --> 0:24:25.840
<v Speaker 1>is a minister and his father was a minister. The

0:24:25.920 --> 0:24:28.080
<v Speaker 1>teacher when I took my son to school after that,

0:24:29.280 --> 0:24:34.240
<v Speaker 1>let me pray for my son and the rest of

0:24:34.280 --> 0:24:37.719
<v Speaker 1>those kids as I walked into class, and the teacher

0:24:38.920 --> 0:24:46.919
<v Speaker 1>didn't start class until I was done. And I realized,

0:24:46.920 --> 0:24:49.840
<v Speaker 1>we haven't gotten to the guns part of this, because

0:24:49.880 --> 0:24:52.040
<v Speaker 1>I think we're still dealing with the reality of it,

0:24:53.359 --> 0:24:58.840
<v Speaker 1>and we will, so you know, stick around. We're gonna

0:24:58.840 --> 0:25:01.919
<v Speaker 1>come back with more cific cipher read after this