WEBVTT - Dean Unglert's Day Off 0:00:00.480 --> 0:00:04.600 Hell I Suck a Dating with Dengler and Dared Haven 0:00:04.920 --> 0:00:11.119 and I heard radio podcast. Hey, welcome to an all 0:00:11.200 --> 0:00:14.000 new episode of Help I Suck at Dating. I'm Jared 0:00:14.080 --> 0:00:16.960 have Ben Dean is Um. I don't know where the 0:00:17.000 --> 0:00:18.560 hell he is, to be honest, He's going to join 0:00:18.640 --> 0:00:20.159 us on the pockets at some point. But this is 0:00:20.160 --> 0:00:23.360 what happens when you record remotely and you live in 0:00:23.360 --> 0:00:26.480 a van. Uh. Sometimes you're here on the podcast, and 0:00:26.560 --> 0:00:30.040 sometimes you have to find WiFi somehow. But I have 0:00:30.120 --> 0:00:32.559 a wonderful guess that is joining me right off the 0:00:32.560 --> 0:00:35.800 top of the podcast. She's a stand up comedian. She's 0:00:35.840 --> 0:00:40.120 an actress. She has a brand new comedy special entitled 0:00:40.159 --> 0:00:42.280 one of my favorite comedy special plots of all time, 0:00:42.680 --> 0:00:44.960 Never Been Kissed, because it's also one of my favorite 0:00:45.080 --> 0:00:47.760 rom coms of all time. Nicole Burch, Nicole, thank you 0:00:47.800 --> 0:00:50.239 so much for joining us. Thank you for having me? 0:00:50.360 --> 0:00:52.240 Oh my god, of course. Well Nicole, are you? Are 0:00:52.280 --> 0:00:55.160 you a Bachelor fan? Do you watch the show? Okay, 0:00:55.200 --> 0:00:58.160 so I am, but not nearly as much as my mother, 0:00:58.880 --> 0:01:01.680 so make sense I would. I'm actually quarantining at my 0:01:01.720 --> 0:01:03.920 mom's house right now, and I can tell her ears 0:01:04.000 --> 0:01:06.759 pressed against the door where we're recording this because she's 0:01:06.840 --> 0:01:09.720 freaking out right now. Oh that's amazing. Usually that's the 0:01:09.760 --> 0:01:11.679 response I'm used to. It's like, yeah, I kind of 0:01:11.680 --> 0:01:14.920 watched the show. My mom loves the show. Though. If 0:01:14.959 --> 0:01:18.960 I had a nickel every time I heard that, Uh, well, 0:01:18.959 --> 0:01:22.760 I wouldn't be doing this podcast. Um. But Nicole, so 0:01:22.840 --> 0:01:24.440 you have a brand new special out that's been out 0:01:24.480 --> 0:01:26.440 for a couple of months now. You recorded it before 0:01:26.920 --> 0:01:29.679 COVID went down, because I've been I've been watching. Uh, 0:01:29.680 --> 0:01:31.920 I watched it and I mean it's a pack room. 0:01:32.000 --> 0:01:34.160 So how long ago did you record it? And then 0:01:34.160 --> 0:01:37.160 it came out what in August I believe came out 0:01:37.200 --> 0:01:41.040 September fifteen, but we shot it at the very end 0:01:41.120 --> 0:01:44.959 of two thousand eighteen, um, and so it took uh. 0:01:45.520 --> 0:01:47.280 We were hoping to release it at the beginning of 0:01:47.319 --> 0:01:49.800 this year, but then COVID happened, and I didn't know 0:01:49.840 --> 0:01:51.320 if I was going to be going on tour and 0:01:51.360 --> 0:01:53.080 what that would look like. And eventually I was like, 0:01:53.120 --> 0:01:55.440 you know, I really want this to get out while 0:01:55.560 --> 0:01:58.320 while it's still timely, So we decided to just do 0:01:58.360 --> 0:02:01.880 the release state on September fifteen. Um, it's very funny. 0:02:01.960 --> 0:02:05.160 I love when you talk about dating between dating guys 0:02:05.160 --> 0:02:07.440 in Kansas and dating guys in Los Angeles and how 0:02:07.480 --> 0:02:10.600 people are like, oh, you know, dating is the same everywhere, 0:02:10.919 --> 0:02:14.240 and then you're like, but it's not. It's very different 0:02:14.320 --> 0:02:17.080 dating guys in Los Angeles versus dating guys in Kansas. 0:02:17.120 --> 0:02:20.400 So my question is, why did you want to title 0:02:20.440 --> 0:02:23.760 it Never Been Kissed? Because obviously that's a play. Well, 0:02:23.800 --> 0:02:28.480 that's just a reference to the romantic comedy es from 0:02:28.720 --> 0:02:32.080 rom com with Drew Barrymore. Right, So, um, I was 0:02:32.120 --> 0:02:35.440 obsessed with that movie when I was a teenager. I 0:02:35.480 --> 0:02:38.440 watched it. I had no friends in high school, so 0:02:38.480 --> 0:02:41.519 I probably watched that film three times in one year. 0:02:41.760 --> 0:02:45.240 That's impressive. Yeah, it was. But you know, I related 0:02:45.240 --> 0:02:48.040 to Drew Barrymore's character because she was like this nerdy 0:02:48.080 --> 0:02:51.960 girl and always like had a crush on the attractive 0:02:52.000 --> 0:02:55.480 popular guys, but was always like dismissed. And so I 0:02:55.520 --> 0:02:59.320 really related to that. And then the main point of 0:02:59.360 --> 0:03:01.960 the comedy actualists to talk about a date that I 0:03:02.000 --> 0:03:04.680 actually go on with the leading man and never been 0:03:04.760 --> 0:03:09.800 kissed Michael Vartan and so have you watched that movie recently. 0:03:10.480 --> 0:03:13.680 Oh yeah, all right, so I love this movie as well. 0:03:13.720 --> 0:03:18.720 I'm gonna humble brag for a second. I've met David Arquette. Yeah, okay, 0:03:18.760 --> 0:03:21.320 and I really wanted. I wish I saw his car 0:03:21.440 --> 0:03:23.240 so I could call his car Bamby, but I didn't 0:03:23.280 --> 0:03:25.520 have the balls to do that. But he is a 0:03:25.560 --> 0:03:27.640 Bachelor fan and he knew who I was. So it 0:03:27.680 --> 0:03:29.480 was one of the greatest moments of my life because 0:03:29.480 --> 0:03:31.200 not only do I love Never Been kissed, but I'm 0:03:31.240 --> 0:03:35.000 also a massive screen fan. So to meet Deputy Dewey 0:03:35.080 --> 0:03:39.080 in real life was quite a spectacular moment for myself. Um. 0:03:39.120 --> 0:03:41.440 But I also loved that movie. But I just watched 0:03:41.440 --> 0:03:47.160 it recently. I gotta be honest, the whole teacher like 0:03:47.400 --> 0:03:50.000 falling in love with Drew Barrymore before he knows that 0:03:50.120 --> 0:03:53.040 she's an adult. Like it's something I can't get past 0:03:53.120 --> 0:03:56.960 now as being an adult, Yeah, does not hold up, 0:03:57.120 --> 0:04:00.440 especially not in like the environment the last few years. 0:04:00.720 --> 0:04:03.960 I watched it and I was like, this is super inappropriate, 0:04:04.000 --> 0:04:07.440 you know, like post me too, Like you just pull 0:04:07.520 --> 0:04:11.400 the T shirt a little bit. You can't. You can't. Um, 0:04:11.440 --> 0:04:14.320 So Nicole, what for? Well, I know you can't really 0:04:14.360 --> 0:04:17.239 talk about the date because it's like what the special 0:04:17.440 --> 0:04:20.719 is all about. But I guess, like, since we're a 0:04:20.800 --> 0:04:26.000 dating podcast, what has your experience been overall? Dating? Uh 0:04:26.040 --> 0:04:30.600 in Kansas, dating in Los Angeles, just dating in general. Um. 0:04:30.640 --> 0:04:34.479 I think the biggest thing is that until I kind 0:04:34.520 --> 0:04:37.640 of did some soul searching and fixed who I was 0:04:38.080 --> 0:04:40.880 like up to that point, which not that I still 0:04:40.920 --> 0:04:43.080 don't have plenty of work to do, but up to 0:04:43.160 --> 0:04:48.080 that point, I attracted, um, the people of the same 0:04:48.120 --> 0:04:50.359 sort that hadn't figured their life out, that didn't know 0:04:50.400 --> 0:04:53.479 who they were. Um, and that was kind of traumatic 0:04:53.560 --> 0:04:55.160 in a lot of ways because a lot of the 0:04:55.200 --> 0:04:57.320 guys that I would date, I mean, my mom always 0:04:57.320 --> 0:04:59.480 said I could go into a bar with a hundred 0:04:59.480 --> 0:05:01.599 guys and would walk out with the one drug addict 0:05:01.640 --> 0:05:07.360 like that, you pick the good ones. Yeah, So um, yeah, 0:05:07.400 --> 0:05:11.880 I don't attract that anymore, which is great. I also, uh, 0:05:12.480 --> 0:05:14.560 you know, we make mistakes and stuff. There's people I've 0:05:14.640 --> 0:05:19.440 dated that I would never date now given the same circumstances. 0:05:19.480 --> 0:05:22.080 So that's you know, I guess that's growth. Yeah, you 0:05:22.160 --> 0:05:24.520 grow and learn. That's the whole point of dating, isn't it. 0:05:24.560 --> 0:05:26.320 So you can go out there, you can learn about 0:05:26.360 --> 0:05:27.880 the things that you do like and the things that 0:05:27.920 --> 0:05:32.040 you don't like. Yeah, like dating guys in Los Angeles 0:05:32.120 --> 0:05:36.200 kind of sucks. Oh man, it's that's such a bad time. 0:05:36.800 --> 0:05:39.880 I feel very lucky because I moved out here uh 0:05:39.920 --> 0:05:43.600 in late uh and I was only here for like 0:05:43.600 --> 0:05:47.839 four or five months before I started dating my girlfriend 0:05:47.960 --> 0:05:51.040 now wife, So I never really like experienced dating in 0:05:51.200 --> 0:05:52.920 l A all that much. And I was born to 0:05:53.000 --> 0:05:55.600 rage Rhode Island, so I can kind of relate to 0:05:55.640 --> 0:05:58.479 you about dating in Kansas versus Los Angeles, because dating 0:05:58.520 --> 0:06:02.080 Rhoe Island is very different too. Uh, that's crazy. It's 0:06:02.120 --> 0:06:04.320 just because Los Angeles there's so many, like you know, 0:06:04.400 --> 0:06:09.000 sparkly things that like everybody's always looking for the nespects thing. Yeah, 0:06:09.080 --> 0:06:11.200 and it's and everything is so spread out. And then 0:06:11.240 --> 0:06:14.960 you've got logistics. You've got travel time, So even if 0:06:14.960 --> 0:06:18.080 somebody's like fifteen miles away, you're like, how are you 0:06:18.160 --> 0:06:19.839 we going to commute? That's an hour and a half 0:06:19.839 --> 0:06:23.279 on drive. Um. And then but yeah, you're right, everybody's 0:06:23.320 --> 0:06:25.680 got the bigger, better deal syndrome and they're always looking 0:06:25.720 --> 0:06:30.200 somewhere else. Um. Myself I'm also guilty of that, but 0:06:30.240 --> 0:06:34.200 it's been a yeah LA's But then in Kansas. It's 0:06:34.240 --> 0:06:36.480 like I asked my brother. I was like, what's your 0:06:36.520 --> 0:06:38.640 top three things you're looking for? When he was like 0:06:38.680 --> 0:06:43.440 twenty two, I asked him this and he was like, well, career, wife, kids, 0:06:43.880 --> 0:06:46.480 And if I asked any of my male friends that 0:06:46.520 --> 0:06:49.320 were single in l A, they'd be like, well, career, 0:06:49.440 --> 0:06:52.200 the second career, a third career, a car, maybe like 0:06:52.240 --> 0:06:54.080 a girlfriend. I don't know if I want to be 0:06:54.160 --> 0:06:57.919 steady girlfriend. And then but like family and stuff, was 0:06:57.920 --> 0:07:00.800 not even top ten. If she has an instant Graham following, 0:07:00.839 --> 0:07:05.240 that would be great. It's a nice bonus. Um. Yeah, 0:07:05.279 --> 0:07:08.760 it's an interesting guy. It's an interesting uh look at 0:07:08.760 --> 0:07:10.920 the dating world. I'm glad that I get to look 0:07:10.960 --> 0:07:13.640 at it from the outside of very lucky. Um. But 0:07:13.720 --> 0:07:17.239 like again, seeing her a dating, I don't want to pry, 0:07:17.320 --> 0:07:21.360 but like what you are you single? Now? Are you dating? No? 0:07:21.520 --> 0:07:24.239 I'm actually single. I have a one year old daughter. 0:07:25.160 --> 0:07:28.880 That's her name. Her name is every wants a beautiful name. 0:07:29.600 --> 0:07:33.240 She's adorable. She is a ray of sunshine. When I say, 0:07:33.400 --> 0:07:36.720 she's probably the smiliest baby I've ever seen. I don't 0:07:36.720 --> 0:07:39.680 know where she gets it. She is just pure joy 0:07:39.800 --> 0:07:42.040 all day long. I've been very, very lucky. Well, you're 0:07:42.080 --> 0:07:44.840 a professional stand up comedian, like I'm sure Everley just 0:07:45.600 --> 0:07:48.800 you're making her constantly laugh. That's why she always has 0:07:48.800 --> 0:07:51.200 a smile on her face. That could be it, that 0:07:51.240 --> 0:07:54.680 could be but yeah, no, So I'm single, and um, 0:07:54.680 --> 0:07:56.920 her her dad and I have never been together. We've 0:07:56.960 --> 0:07:59.880 just been really good friends for like four years before 0:08:00.600 --> 0:08:04.760 that happened, and it was a one time thing. And 0:08:05.080 --> 0:08:08.560 uh yeah, so that's so even after the comedy spectral 0:08:08.560 --> 0:08:12.720 in my life got crazier and now one year old. Yeah. Um, 0:08:12.840 --> 0:08:15.440 and so what is dating during COVID been like for you? 0:08:16.240 --> 0:08:19.760 I have not dated at all. I I okay, So 0:08:19.800 --> 0:08:22.640 I did get back on Tinder. I'm currently in Kansas City. 0:08:23.040 --> 0:08:25.320 Tinder it seems like an interesting choice for all, like 0:08:25.360 --> 0:08:27.720 the dating apps you could be on. Well, I think 0:08:27.720 --> 0:08:31.040 only because it's in Kansas City. Tender game in Kansas 0:08:31.040 --> 0:08:34.240 City is very different. It's very light. There's like some 0:08:34.400 --> 0:08:37.640 courting going on, which is really nice. Were in l A. 0:08:37.679 --> 0:08:42.000 Tinder is just like a hookup site, right, hook up Central? Yeah, 0:08:42.080 --> 0:08:44.160 hook up Central, Like that's what that's all you're there for. 0:08:44.520 --> 0:08:47.200 So this has been interesting. Um, but I still haven't 0:08:47.280 --> 0:08:50.040 met in person anybody. There was somebody I was talking 0:08:50.040 --> 0:08:53.440 to for a few weeks who's lovely, who of course 0:08:53.480 --> 0:08:56.360 in Kansas, if he's available at my age, means he's 0:08:56.360 --> 0:09:01.000 divorced with three children. Um, so it's just very different. 0:09:03.240 --> 0:09:07.400 Oh well, hey, I feel I feel for a lot 0:09:07.440 --> 0:09:09.640 of singles out there right now who are going through 0:09:09.720 --> 0:09:14.120 something similar, because it's one dating is tough in general, 0:09:14.880 --> 0:09:17.520 forget about COVID, but now you throw this pandemic in there, 0:09:18.120 --> 0:09:20.680 and dating is just a free for all, and now 0:09:20.760 --> 0:09:23.800 you have to worry about this virus. And do I 0:09:24.240 --> 0:09:26.480 you know, how much do I like this person to 0:09:26.640 --> 0:09:29.480 like risk getting COVID nineteen to meet up with them? 0:09:29.520 --> 0:09:32.520 Do we go on six ft dates? Do we elbow like? 0:09:32.920 --> 0:09:35.960 It's so like you just add another layer of stress 0:09:36.040 --> 0:09:40.640 onto dating that's already a stressful experience. Yeah, a thousand percent. 0:09:40.720 --> 0:09:46.280 My daughter, her father Craig, Um, he's actually quarantining in Utah, 0:09:46.360 --> 0:09:48.080 but then goes back back and forth to l A 0:09:48.200 --> 0:09:53.440 to work, and for him, his dating game is going great. 0:09:53.520 --> 0:09:55.000 And I get to hear all the stories and it 0:09:55.120 --> 0:09:58.959 is hilarious to me because the same thing with Utah. 0:09:59.320 --> 0:10:02.160 He's like, all these women are ready to commit, they're 0:10:02.200 --> 0:10:04.800 ready to get married, they're down to have more kids. 0:10:05.040 --> 0:10:07.440 They don't mind that I have a daughter, like all 0:10:07.440 --> 0:10:10.080 this stuff. And he goes, but in l A, it's 0:10:10.160 --> 0:10:12.440 even for him, even for a guy. He goes, it's 0:10:12.480 --> 0:10:15.560 completely one eighty. He goes, I've been stood up twice 0:10:15.600 --> 0:10:18.240 because the girl forgot we had a date. And I 0:10:18.320 --> 0:10:21.320 was like, what is happening. He's like, it's it's so 0:10:21.480 --> 0:10:25.040 it's so strange right now, but he's but he's he's 0:10:25.080 --> 0:10:28.720 for it, being COVID and stuff. I was like, man, 0:10:29.840 --> 0:10:32.400 are you being like careful, you like sanitizing? Are you 0:10:32.520 --> 0:10:34.640 like saying He's like, yeah, we did a six ft 0:10:34.679 --> 0:10:37.360 distant date one time where they stayed six ft apart. 0:10:37.800 --> 0:10:40.240 They did the elbow nudge like you said, And I 0:10:40.320 --> 0:10:43.240 was like, that's so crazy. It's crazy. But you know, 0:10:43.320 --> 0:10:44.760 it's just kind of like the time we're living in. 0:10:45.280 --> 0:10:48.240 So I'm sure there's a lot of women that are 0:10:48.480 --> 0:10:51.560 listening to this and and can relate to being in 0:10:51.600 --> 0:10:54.520 the dating world with kids, because that adds a different element. 0:10:54.559 --> 0:10:57.160 And we always talk about on this podcast, I want 0:10:57.160 --> 0:11:00.599 to ask you, how early on on a day or 0:11:01.080 --> 0:11:03.600 or meeting someone would you tell them you have kids? 0:11:04.080 --> 0:11:07.200 Does that mean does that the question makes sense? Like yeah, 0:11:07.240 --> 0:11:10.840 I mean I would probably depending on it, Like I think, 0:11:10.840 --> 0:11:14.000 if it's on if you're doing online, I put it 0:11:14.040 --> 0:11:16.480 out there that I have a daughter, like I just like, 0:11:16.520 --> 0:11:19.720 let's skip to that. If it is somebody that I've 0:11:19.720 --> 0:11:22.920 met um organically at a party or something like that 0:11:22.960 --> 0:11:25.760 and we hit it off, I mean I still would 0:11:25.800 --> 0:11:29.520 do it pretty early on. I just I mean, I 0:11:29.559 --> 0:11:31.560 know it's one of those things because it's like, well, 0:11:31.600 --> 0:11:32.959 I don't want to scare them off, but I'm like, well, 0:11:32.960 --> 0:11:35.959 this is also what it is, yes, because you're you're 0:11:36.000 --> 0:11:39.800 not just looking for a partner, you're looking for somebody 0:11:39.800 --> 0:11:43.679 who's willing to be a dad. Pretty quickly, I would imagine, yeah. Yeah. 0:11:43.720 --> 0:11:46.640 And my thing with that is since having her, I've 0:11:46.679 --> 0:11:50.920 become so much pickier because the guys I dated before, 0:11:50.960 --> 0:11:52.280 I was like, oh, you just have to have like 0:11:53.000 --> 0:11:55.040 you know, you have to have a car in a 0:11:55.080 --> 0:11:56.920 sense of humor, and now I'm like, no, you need 0:11:56.920 --> 0:11:58.920 a four oh one K and the Disney Plus channel, 0:11:58.960 --> 0:12:02.640 like you have that. Yeah, that's on your tender profile. 0:12:02.720 --> 0:12:06.120 It's like looking for a nice guy for one, okay 0:12:06.720 --> 0:12:10.480 for k if I could say it properly. Um. I 0:12:10.559 --> 0:12:14.080 also want to talk about your stand up because I am. 0:12:14.120 --> 0:12:16.840 I love going to comedy shows. I'm lucky because we 0:12:16.880 --> 0:12:19.160 live in West Hollywood, so I mean obviously not recently, 0:12:19.160 --> 0:12:21.840 but we live near the Laugh Factory comedy store. Some 0:12:21.880 --> 0:12:23.760 of my favorite comedians growing up, like Bill Burr's my 0:12:23.760 --> 0:12:29.120 favorite comedian of all, my favorite's virtual high five. Yes, 0:12:29.240 --> 0:12:31.959 so we have never been kissed in common and Bill Burr, 0:12:32.880 --> 0:12:35.760 do you listen to the Monday Morning podcast? I haven't, 0:12:35.800 --> 0:12:39.199 I haven't you got It's just him rambling. It's hysterical. 0:12:40.080 --> 0:12:42.559 Any interview he does, because that's what he does, is 0:12:42.600 --> 0:12:45.200 he rants? Right, So but any interview or even like 0:12:45.360 --> 0:12:48.000 late at night. I can watch those videos over and 0:12:48.120 --> 0:12:50.600 over and over because they just give them a little 0:12:50.720 --> 0:12:54.960 nugget and he rolls with it so hard. There's interviews 0:12:55.200 --> 0:12:59.480 of him with Conan O'Brien that I've probably watched at 0:12:59.559 --> 0:13:03.240 least fit t times. Yeah, because then Conan cracks up 0:13:03.280 --> 0:13:05.080 and it's just I love Bill Burrow. I also like 0:13:05.240 --> 0:13:07.400 when I was growing up as a team Dane Cook 0:13:07.440 --> 0:13:09.640 was very influential in my life because he was like 0:13:09.679 --> 0:13:12.120 the first guy to ever use social media as a 0:13:12.160 --> 0:13:15.600 ways to promote his work. I remember him on my 0:13:15.640 --> 0:13:18.080 Space like putting dates out there and like where he 0:13:18.160 --> 0:13:19.120 was going to be, and he was one of the 0:13:19.440 --> 0:13:22.760 like a pioneer, pioneer in that in that realm. Richard 0:13:22.760 --> 0:13:24.280 Pryor was a big one for me when I was 0:13:24.320 --> 0:13:29.439 a kid, Eddie Murphy, um, who else? Yeah, but now 0:13:29.640 --> 0:13:31.839 I like I listened to obviously Joe Rogan, a lot, 0:13:31.920 --> 0:13:34.920 Nicky Klasier, I listened to a lot um, But who 0:13:34.960 --> 0:13:37.280 were some of your idols? Like why did you want 0:13:37.280 --> 0:13:40.080 to get into the stand up comedy world? Like I 0:13:40.679 --> 0:13:42.800 when it comes to stand up I also like Louis 0:13:42.800 --> 0:13:45.800 Black and I'm not I don't do political humor at all, 0:13:46.280 --> 0:13:50.120 but I'm like for him, I think he's fantastic. Um, 0:13:50.160 --> 0:13:53.120 I think, uh, there's so much of my stuff that 0:13:53.200 --> 0:13:55.560 is a little similar to Amy Schumer, which we you know, 0:13:55.640 --> 0:13:57.520 blonde hair, blue eyes. So I'm like trying not to 0:13:57.559 --> 0:13:59.720 hit that home too hard, but a lot of stuff 0:13:59.760 --> 0:14:03.080 Dane Cook. I think it was his HBO special that 0:14:03.160 --> 0:14:08.800 what was the circle Vicious Circle? Yes, and he did 0:14:08.920 --> 0:14:14.240 one of my favorite bits about religion and that he goes, 0:14:14.720 --> 0:14:16.920 you know, like an atheist, was like, oh, our ashes 0:14:17.480 --> 0:14:20.320 turned into soil, and then the soil grows into a 0:14:20.320 --> 0:14:21.880 tree and it goes. But then you cut the tree 0:14:21.880 --> 0:14:25.160 down and they print the Bible on you. Oh yeah, yeah. Yeah. 0:14:25.200 --> 0:14:26.920 That to me was like, I was like, that was 0:14:26.960 --> 0:14:32.640 the strongest. I adored that entire Yeah. I've always just 0:14:32.680 --> 0:14:35.440 been fascinated with stand up comedy. So and I was 0:14:35.480 --> 0:14:37.800 watching your special, and I gotta be honest, you have 0:14:37.840 --> 0:14:42.040 a natural charisma on stage, and uh, I think you 0:14:42.120 --> 0:14:46.560 have a very very bright future ahead of you. Um oh, 0:14:46.600 --> 0:14:49.680 it's so true because I you know, I'm certainly not 0:14:49.800 --> 0:14:51.880 an expert in the field by any stretch, but I've 0:14:51.920 --> 0:14:54.600 seen enough comedy specials to know that, you know, some 0:14:54.640 --> 0:14:58.080 people just have a certain um aura about them when 0:14:58.080 --> 0:15:00.680 they're on stage and their comp it and funny and 0:15:00.720 --> 0:15:04.600 self deprecating and in certain timing with jokes and and 0:15:04.720 --> 0:15:07.360 jokes that you're telling. Because some guys, some people, I 0:15:07.400 --> 0:15:09.600 feel like they go on stage and and they're telling 0:15:09.680 --> 0:15:11.480 jokes and you can tell that they're jokes that are 0:15:11.520 --> 0:15:14.160 not authentic to them. One of the reasons why I 0:15:14.160 --> 0:15:16.240 love comedy so much is because it feels like somebody's 0:15:16.240 --> 0:15:18.360 telling the story of their life, but in a comedic 0:15:18.440 --> 0:15:20.880 way that's relatable. And that's what I get from you 0:15:20.960 --> 0:15:23.360 when you're talking about your dating life and how awkward 0:15:23.400 --> 0:15:28.520 it is meeting new people. Um, it's uh, it's really authentic. 0:15:28.600 --> 0:15:31.240 It's very funny, and I can't tell you how much 0:15:31.240 --> 0:15:34.840 I enjoyed it. Thank you. I appreciate that. Yeah, I think, Um, 0:15:34.960 --> 0:15:37.360 because I started off in like sketch comedy, so I 0:15:37.400 --> 0:15:40.960 think I obviously have people in stand up that I love, 0:15:41.360 --> 0:15:43.880 But I was always like a Lucy ole Ball Carol Burnett, 0:15:43.920 --> 0:15:46.400 like that was my that's my jam. And so I 0:15:46.440 --> 0:15:48.240 did Groundlings in l A and I got to wear 0:15:48.280 --> 0:15:51.800 all the wigs and mustaches and everything. Um. So stand 0:15:51.880 --> 0:15:55.040 up is definitely a different art form. And I originally 0:15:55.080 --> 0:15:58.080 started doing it because I was writing scripts and I 0:15:58.120 --> 0:16:00.240 was like, well, what jokes work best, Let's try it 0:16:00.240 --> 0:16:03.600 out on stage. And it was able to like kind 0:16:03.600 --> 0:16:06.680 of combine my writing with performance art, but I was 0:16:06.720 --> 0:16:10.280 still able to be myself and with that, like, I 0:16:10.320 --> 0:16:14.680 love storytelling, it's my favorite thing to do. That said, 0:16:14.680 --> 0:16:16.760 when somebody's like Hey, tell us a joke. I'm like, 0:16:16.800 --> 0:16:19.680 I don't. I don't really tell why did the chicken 0:16:19.760 --> 0:16:22.640 cross the road? I don't can know, I don't. I 0:16:22.720 --> 0:16:25.200 don't do those at all. I'm doing Like anybody's like, 0:16:25.200 --> 0:16:27.120 what's the quickest joke you have? And I'm like, it's 0:16:27.120 --> 0:16:30.360 still gonna take about thirty five seconds. So like that, 0:16:30.600 --> 0:16:33.840 you know. So I've I've really come to appreciate that. 0:16:34.000 --> 0:16:36.400 I don't think I'm a typical comic that's you know, 0:16:36.520 --> 0:16:39.120 at the clubs six seven nights a week, or tours 0:16:39.160 --> 0:16:44.360 the country. But I do really love storytelling, and it's 0:16:44.480 --> 0:16:47.960 very cathartic to like share some of my really embarrassing 0:16:48.040 --> 0:16:51.960 moments um and then to have people come up afterwards 0:16:51.960 --> 0:16:54.200 and be like, oh my gosh, something similar happened to me, 0:16:54.480 --> 0:16:57.200 thank you for making me laugh about it. That stuff. 0:16:57.240 --> 0:17:00.840 That's the reason I do it, because I to that 0:17:00.960 --> 0:17:05.639 human connection with other people's like paramount um. And before 0:17:05.640 --> 0:17:08.760 you go, because your your your special is called never 0:17:08.840 --> 0:17:14.560 been kissed? Do you remember your first kiss? Oh my gosh, yes, Okay, 0:17:14.920 --> 0:17:17.760 his name was Steve bosch Leger. Remember his first and 0:17:17.880 --> 0:17:21.800 last name. Yes, his name was Steve bosch Leger. And 0:17:21.960 --> 0:17:24.719 he was a senior and I was a freshman. Wow, 0:17:24.880 --> 0:17:28.879 you badass, look at you go. And he was a 0:17:29.000 --> 0:17:32.520 varsity baseball player. You were a freshman and your your 0:17:32.600 --> 0:17:38.000 first kiss with the was with a senior varsity baseball player. Yes, 0:17:38.160 --> 0:17:40.520 you said you had no friends. I don't believe you anymore. 0:17:40.840 --> 0:17:43.160 This was I was new to this school. It's actually 0:17:43.160 --> 0:17:44.639 in the town my mom lives in right now. There 0:17:44.680 --> 0:17:47.520 was only four hundred kids in the entire high school. 0:17:48.400 --> 0:17:51.480 And he, like, looking back, he definitely like swooped in. 0:17:51.560 --> 0:17:53.960 I was like, oh, freshman, because everybody know you're either 0:17:54.119 --> 0:17:56.560 related to half the town or you know what I mean, 0:17:56.600 --> 0:17:58.800 like that you're off, yeah, or your second cousins with 0:17:58.880 --> 0:18:01.400 him or your second gues. So like we actually had 0:18:01.400 --> 0:18:03.440 to find out, like we're not related, right, and we weren't, 0:18:03.480 --> 0:18:06.720 Thank goodness. So I remember like when we were kissing. 0:18:06.800 --> 0:18:09.959 This is so embarrassing. I can't wait to hear it. Okay, 0:18:10.040 --> 0:18:12.760 we weren't kissing, and I was like, I think, I'm 0:18:12.800 --> 0:18:15.240 I think I'm doing it right. I've watched enough movies, right, 0:18:15.280 --> 0:18:17.800 this is right, And like we stopped for a minute 0:18:17.840 --> 0:18:20.160 and I was like, is this like and we were 0:18:20.240 --> 0:18:23.000 he was holding me really close. Obviously we're fully closed. I'm, 0:18:23.200 --> 0:18:25.679 you know, a freshman in high school whatever. But I 0:18:25.720 --> 0:18:27.960 asked him. I was like, is this is this what 0:18:28.080 --> 0:18:31.119 sex is? And he was like, no, what are you 0:18:31.160 --> 0:18:32.960 talking about? And I was like, well, just because like we're, 0:18:33.000 --> 0:18:35.959 you know, we're just like really close. He's like, you 0:18:36.040 --> 0:18:37.560 know what it is, right, and I was like yeah, 0:18:37.600 --> 0:18:40.320 but I don't. Like I'm like, my hormones are going crazy. 0:18:40.359 --> 0:18:42.280 And he was like, gat me to calm down, and 0:18:42.320 --> 0:18:45.479 he did not talk to me after that. Everybody I 0:18:45.520 --> 0:18:50.480 asked if we were having sex fully closed very embarrassing. 0:18:51.119 --> 0:18:52.720 I mean, it's a hell of a first kiss story, 0:18:52.760 --> 0:18:55.239 I'll tell you that much. Yeah. Yeah. I was like, 0:18:55.280 --> 0:18:57.320 this is how babies are made and he's like, absolutely not, 0:18:57.480 --> 0:18:59.240 that's not what this is. It's funny about that. I 0:18:59.240 --> 0:19:04.919 was watching hocus Pocus last night and phenomenal and obviously 0:19:05.720 --> 0:19:09.199 you know they say that, uh, Max is a virgin 0:19:09.280 --> 0:19:11.960 that lights the black flame candle. When I was a kid, 0:19:12.000 --> 0:19:15.199 obviously had no idea what a virgin was. So I 0:19:15.240 --> 0:19:19.400 asked my mom, Mom, what's a virgin and she goes, oh, 0:19:19.400 --> 0:19:24.800 it's uh when um, somebody's not married, their virgin and 0:19:24.840 --> 0:19:27.400 looking back, I was like, what a great explanation at 0:19:27.400 --> 0:19:31.840 the time, like, way to think fast on your feet, Mom, 0:19:31.920 --> 0:19:35.479 that's good parenting right there. That yeah, that's great. My 0:19:35.520 --> 0:19:39.080 first kiss was definitely not a school I was. What 0:19:39.160 --> 0:19:42.399 was I I was a sophomore in high school and 0:19:42.480 --> 0:19:45.520 I went to a dance with a girl from a 0:19:45.560 --> 0:19:48.920 different high school that I really liked but of course 0:19:49.040 --> 0:19:53.040 never made a move on. And we were dancing and 0:19:53.160 --> 0:19:56.159 she was dancing like I was behind her with my 0:19:56.240 --> 0:19:58.320 arms around her, and she was facing away from me, 0:19:58.400 --> 0:19:59.880 so like, you know, like it was it was kind 0:19:59.880 --> 0:20:02.920 of like for what was like fourteen fifteen at that time, 0:20:02.920 --> 0:20:05.000 it was very sexual, like her button was against me. 0:20:05.440 --> 0:20:09.160 It was pretty intense, and but it was really sweet 0:20:09.200 --> 0:20:10.439 and it was towards the end of the night, and 0:20:10.480 --> 0:20:13.560 obviously I never made a move, but she she like 0:20:13.760 --> 0:20:17.639 looked back at me and she leaned in and kissed me, 0:20:17.680 --> 0:20:19.080 and I was my first kiss and it was just 0:20:19.119 --> 0:20:23.600 a peck, but I like immediately turned red. Uh. It 0:20:23.680 --> 0:20:26.800 was a cool moment because I like, I didn't even 0:20:26.840 --> 0:20:28.480 make the move on my first kiss. She's the one 0:20:28.520 --> 0:20:32.480 who leaned in and kissed me. And yeah, my wife, 0:20:32.480 --> 0:20:34.960 obviously yelling the story of Jared's life because I, as 0:20:34.960 --> 0:20:38.479 she can attest to, I, I rarely make first moves. 0:20:38.600 --> 0:20:41.199 It's just it's quite pathetic. Actually, but it worked out 0:20:41.200 --> 0:20:47.040 because now we're married. Um but uh, but very cool. Well, Nicole, 0:20:47.160 --> 0:20:49.000 I just wanted to say thank you so much for 0:20:49.040 --> 0:20:51.359 joining us today. We really appreciate it your pleasure to 0:20:51.400 --> 0:20:54.560 have on the podcast. Umbly, thank you for having me. 0:20:54.680 --> 0:20:58.000