WEBVTT - Is it for now or forever?

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<v Speaker 1>Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of iHeartRadio. Good Morning,

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<v Speaker 1>This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast. Today's

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<v Speaker 1>tip is that when you are facing a challenging time,

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<v Speaker 1>figure out whether the difficulty is for now or forever.

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<v Speaker 1>You can deal with just about anything for a short

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<v Speaker 1>period of time, but if the hardship is more long term,

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<v Speaker 1>you may need to come up with a different sort

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<v Speaker 1>of plan. So we have all had times when we

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<v Speaker 1>felt especially stretched or challenged. Maybe your workload at your

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<v Speaker 1>job went from manageable to massive, Or maybe your spouse

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<v Speaker 1>got a new job and it's requiring more travel than

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<v Speaker 1>either of you anticipated. Maybe your mom had a fall

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<v Speaker 1>and now she has a hip replacement and rehab in

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<v Speaker 1>her future. It's a lot for her and for you.

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<v Speaker 1>Maybe the new semester has felt like a whirlwind. You

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<v Speaker 1>feel like all your waking hours are spent working, driving,

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<v Speaker 1>picking up drop balls, and recalibrating your schedule for the

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<v Speaker 1>next day. So when you are feeling this way, ask

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<v Speaker 1>yourself this question, is this difficulty temporary or is it

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<v Speaker 1>the new normal? When you know whether an issue is

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<v Speaker 1>for now or forever, you can decide how to navigate it.

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<v Speaker 1>When you know a difficulty or time crunch is for

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<v Speaker 1>the moment, you can view it as a sprint to

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<v Speaker 1>be gotten through. You can do virtually anything for a

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<v Speaker 1>week or even a semester or so if you know

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<v Speaker 1>it's limited. For instance, if your childcare provider is taking

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<v Speaker 1>two weeks off to care for a relative after surgery,

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<v Speaker 1>you can probably piece together a patchwork of others, sitters, relatives,

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<v Speaker 1>and PTO days to make it work. It will be stressful,

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<v Speaker 1>for sure, but for two weeks you can survive. Same

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<v Speaker 1>If you have a busy season at work, you might

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<v Speaker 1>be down a team member, but once someone new is

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<v Speaker 1>hired and trained, your workload will be manageable again. Or

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<v Speaker 1>maybe your team will stay the same size, but the

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<v Speaker 1>volume of work will decrease once you finish a big project.

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<v Speaker 1>Or it may be that every year at this time

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<v Speaker 1>you work your tailoff. You can work at maximum capacity

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<v Speaker 1>one month every year and be okay, even if you

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<v Speaker 1>couldn't produce at that rate sustainably. Part of getting through

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<v Speaker 1>a temporary difficult season may be putting off everything that

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<v Speaker 1>is not urgent. For instance, if you have a big

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<v Speaker 1>work deadline next week, cleaning the house, finding a roofer,

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<v Speaker 1>and processing, non org work, email can all wait. You

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<v Speaker 1>can deal with all of those things once the work

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<v Speaker 1>deadline is behind you. When a difficulty is temporary, you

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<v Speaker 1>can also ask friends and family for help. You can

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<v Speaker 1>feel free to cancel or reschedule plans until after the

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<v Speaker 1>difficult season. When a difficulty or time crunch is ongoing, though,

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<v Speaker 1>you will need to approach it differently. You can't just

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<v Speaker 1>shoulder through difficulty forever. Eventually all those things you put

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<v Speaker 1>off will need to happen, and eventually you can't cobble

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<v Speaker 1>together solutions. If your job is going to be incredibly

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<v Speaker 1>demanding for the foreseeable future, you need to find ways

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<v Speaker 1>to be as efficient with your work as possible. Maybe

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<v Speaker 1>you need to argue for more team members or longer deadlines.

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<v Speaker 1>You may also have to find ways to reduce the

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<v Speaker 1>time you spend on life maintenance. Or maybe you'll decide

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<v Speaker 1>you need to find a new job. But one way

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<v Speaker 1>or another, you will have to get back to sustainability.

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<v Speaker 1>If your nanny decides not to return after that short

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<v Speaker 1>caregiving leave, you will need to find a new nanny

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<v Speaker 1>or to find another full time child care solution. You

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<v Speaker 1>can't have a patchwork of care forever. If your mom

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<v Speaker 1>isn't able to cook or take care of her home

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<v Speaker 1>independently anymore, and you realize that you can't do that

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<v Speaker 1>single handedly while working and taking care of your kids,

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<v Speaker 1>you're going to have to come up with another plan.

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<v Speaker 1>Do you need to get into a rotation with your siblings,

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<v Speaker 1>could you hire a home health aid, or does your

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<v Speaker 1>mom need to move into a retirement community. A forever

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<v Speaker 1>difficulty requires an intentional decision and a long term solution.

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<v Speaker 1>When a difficulty is ongoing, you'll also want to find

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<v Speaker 1>ways to engage with your friends and family and away

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<v Speaker 1>that is more reciprocal. Your neighbor will drive carpool for

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<v Speaker 1>a few weeks and a pinch, but probably won't be

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<v Speaker 1>willing to single handedly drive the carpool for the rest

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<v Speaker 1>of time. If you are never going to be able

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<v Speaker 1>to drive, then you will need to hire someone to

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<v Speaker 1>take this over. Likewise, when your schedule is crunched for

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<v Speaker 1>as far as you can see, you don't want to

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<v Speaker 1>cancel your weekly brunch with your best friend forever and

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<v Speaker 1>leave it at that. You'll need to find some other

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<v Speaker 1>way to stay connected. So if you find yourself facing

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<v Speaker 1>a difficult season, take a breath and figure out whether

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<v Speaker 1>the difficulty or time crunch is temporary or permanent. Then

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<v Speaker 1>with that knowledge you can navigate it more wisely in

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<v Speaker 1>a way that makes sense for you and the people

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<v Speaker 1>around you. In the meantime, this is Laura. Thanks for listening,

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<v Speaker 1>and here's to making the most of our time. Thanks

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<v Speaker 1>for listening to Before Breakfast. If you've got questions, ideas,

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<v Speaker 1>or feedback, you can reach me at Laura at Laura

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<v Speaker 1>vandercam dot com. Before Breakfast is a production of iHeartMedia.

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