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Speaker 1: Calling all my sweeties to the forefront. I'm your host,

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Speaker 1: christer name and this is the Keeping Positive, Sweetish Show,

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Speaker 1: Licensed therapists and just his host, Doctor J. Barnett, has

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Speaker 1: built a national platform around healing and accountability. His story

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Speaker 1: from athlete to advocate shows that faith and emotional intelligence

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Speaker 1: can thrive together. Today, he joins us to talk about growth, grief,

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Speaker 1: and the courage to heal kids. Telly, please give a

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Speaker 1: very warm welcome to King J. Barnett. Finally, yes, finally,

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Speaker 1: we got you here.

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Speaker 2: Listen.

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Speaker 3: We've been talking about this for about what a year?

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Speaker 1: A year now?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, And so I know you was filming and both

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Speaker 2: of our lives are busy, but I feel like it's purposeful.

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Speaker 3: Busy it is.

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Speaker 2: That's why I have to tell people like you got

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Speaker 2: so much going on, but it's all purposeful, baby, it

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Speaker 2: is purpose I.

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Speaker 1: Looked at your stories this week alone. I'm like, is

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Speaker 1: he gonna make it to Atlanta?

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Speaker 3: Yeah?

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Speaker 2: Oh yeah, I was coming, Crystal, I was coming. I

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Speaker 2: was coming. I was coming. So yeah, I started out.

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Speaker 2: I haven't been home in like three weeks.

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Speaker 1: Wow.

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Speaker 2: So I was in Detroit for no. I was in

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Speaker 2: New York because it started I did the breakfast club

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Speaker 2: for World Mental Health Day and brought Joel with me,

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Speaker 2: and then Taraji had her mental health weekends, so I

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Speaker 2: keynoted for her.

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Speaker 3: And then after that I was.

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Speaker 2: In Detroit and then Canada seven days, and then Costa

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Speaker 2: Rica and now here and then I'm in Toronto after

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Speaker 2: But I'm gonna take a break after this sto. I

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Speaker 2: got to get this book done and I got to

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Speaker 2: settle down.

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Speaker 1: So awesome, awesome, I love it. Well, Jay, you took

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Speaker 1: the world by storm on the internet, and I first

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Speaker 1: saw you on social media really giving men a safe

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Speaker 1: space to even have a voice, to be vulnerable and

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Speaker 1: to start healing. And I feel like for black men,

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Speaker 1: therapy has been so stigmatized and you've taken that stigma

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Speaker 1: off and allowed black men to just be themselves and

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Speaker 1: speak truth and really like had face on with their trauma.

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Speaker 1: But that did not come without healing of your own. Yes,

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Speaker 1: So I want to talk about that. You've been very

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Speaker 1: open about when football was over, you hit rock bottom,

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Speaker 1: But how did you know it was time to start healing?

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Speaker 1: And like what moment happened to You're like, wait a minute,

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Speaker 1: this is a problem I need to Yeah.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, well, really, I didn't know it was time. Crystal.

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Speaker 2: My second suicide attempt is what really sort of kind

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Speaker 2: of you know, pushed me to going therapy.

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Speaker 3: So I was living with.

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Speaker 2: My godmother at the time, and I was living with

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Speaker 2: her because I was training pro athletes, very successful business

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Speaker 2: and I had a house, and she was like, you

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Speaker 2: need to get out of the house and come to

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Speaker 2: stay with me and cut down your overhead. So my godmother, man,

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Speaker 2: she's big and finances. So I was just like, man,

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Speaker 2: I can't do this. Man, I'm like thirty one years old.

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Speaker 2: I'm like, I can't, you know, take away from what

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Speaker 2: I you know, what I was building at the time.

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Speaker 3: So I said, let me pray about it.

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Speaker 2: Because my godmother was never able to have kids, so

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Speaker 2: she took me under her wings and she says, Jay,

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Speaker 2: I really think you should focus on the speaking thing,

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Speaker 2: what you're doing with the teens and the youth. And

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Speaker 2: I'm like, man, So I make the move and I

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Speaker 2: get there. By this time, I'm about a year in

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Speaker 2: living with her, and I have a mental breakdown just

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Speaker 2: because I felt like a failure number one, because I'm like, man,

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Speaker 2: I'm trying to figure out life and I'm staying with

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Speaker 2: my godmother and she has a nice sized house, so

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Speaker 2: it wasn't like I was in her space, so she

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Speaker 2: was in my space. And it was good because it

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Speaker 2: allowed me to really look at life differently. And so

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Speaker 2: one night I was on a call with my parents

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Speaker 2: and just kind of sharing how I.

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Speaker 3: Was still battling this depression thing.

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Speaker 2: So and when I share this, because it could take

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Speaker 2: a spend because at that time, I don't don't think

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Speaker 2: my father really understood the significant and the severity of

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Speaker 2: what I was going through. So he makes a statement

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Speaker 2: on the phone, here we go again. Oh wow, And

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Speaker 2: that was a trigger. And after he said that, I

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Speaker 2: told my mom I said, you know what, man, I'm

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Speaker 2: tired of this man like you know, because I was

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Speaker 2: really trying to find a way to talk about what

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Speaker 2: I was going through mentally, but nobody was listening. So

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Speaker 2: I told her, I said, well, this is probably the

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Speaker 2: last time that y'all gonna talk to me. And she

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Speaker 2: says to me, Jay, please don't do nothing. Sign please,

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Speaker 2: And I said, Mama, I'm tired.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: And I had been caring this pain from their divorce,

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Speaker 2: from the rejection of my mother had remarried her husband,

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Speaker 2: the god that she remarried, was physically abusive. I lived

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Speaker 2: with a white family for the last two years of

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Speaker 2: my high school year. Man, I just gone through a

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Speaker 2: lot from the time that my parents' divorced up until

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Speaker 2: you know, thirty, because I had never processed anything. Because

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Speaker 2: the thing about football, man, you can put that helmet

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Speaker 2: on and it's a mask.

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Speaker 3: You can hide anything.

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Speaker 2: And I think after years of a neessscizing and all

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Speaker 2: of that stuff just festering, I didn't have I didn't have,

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Speaker 2: you know, an outlet anymore. Football was my outlet. I

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Speaker 2: wasn't playing because I wanted to make money. I was

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Speaker 2: playing because I needed to place the process its pain

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Speaker 2: and being able to run over guys and hit allowed

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Speaker 2: me to get that aggression out. And so my mother

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Speaker 2: says to me, Jay, if you take your life, do

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Speaker 2: you know that you possibly go to hell?

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Speaker 3: And Chris, I remember this so vividly.

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Speaker 2: Me and her talk about this the other day and

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Speaker 2: I said to her, I don't give a damn. I

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Speaker 2: don't care as long as I can get rid of

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Speaker 2: this pain. So I had a back injury that I

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Speaker 2: had been battling, and I had a bunch of pills

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Speaker 2: from that, and I just went in the bathroom and

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Speaker 2: took everything, like everything, and God knew because had I

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Speaker 2: been by myself, I would have shot myself. The only

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Speaker 2: reason that I didn't attempt with the gun because I

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Speaker 2: was living with my godmother and I did not want

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Speaker 2: her to have that visual and to have that scene.

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Speaker 2: So even then I'm still considerate, Yeah, you know what

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Speaker 2: I mean, even while I'm in pain. So I overdose

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Speaker 2: and my godmother found me under the bed and I

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Speaker 2: don't till.

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Speaker 3: This day, I don't know how.

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Speaker 2: And I know it's God because I can remember standing

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Speaker 2: in a dark place when I was out or whatever

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Speaker 2: you know was going on, and I just heard the

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Speaker 2: voice of God just saying.

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Speaker 3: You have got to give this to me. Wow, like literally.

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Speaker 3: And so.

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Speaker 2: After that, my godmother, you know, a day go by,

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Speaker 2: we don't talk about what had happened.

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Speaker 3: And finally she said can we talk?

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Speaker 2: And she said why would you do this in my home?

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Speaker 2: And I just sat there and she says, Jay, if

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Speaker 2: you're going to stay here, you got to get some help.

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Speaker 2: Here's the part that people.

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Speaker 3: Have not heard. My Godmother's white really wow.

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Speaker 2: And she sat there and she said, you got to

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Speaker 2: get some help, and that pushed me to go to

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Speaker 2: therapy because and it wasn't that I wasn't like I

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Speaker 2: was making money and I was. I was, you know,

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Speaker 2: it wasn't like I couldn't work or anything like that,

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Speaker 2: but mentally I wasn't in the best place. And I

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Speaker 2: said to her, I just don't want to be here.

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Speaker 2: And a friend of mine sent me a therapist, which

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Speaker 2: was a Christian Christian guy, and I went to him

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Speaker 2: for a while. I didn't really connect with him because

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Speaker 2: my dad is a pastor, so I say, bro, I

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Speaker 2: don't really need no scriptures.

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Speaker 3: Man. I got to figure out a way how to

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Speaker 3: release this.

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Speaker 2: And most people don't know this that when you think

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Speaker 2: about depression, it's really a lack of expression.

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Speaker 3: That's what depression is.

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Speaker 2: And so no one had really checked on me when

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Speaker 2: my parents divorced. My parents were pastors, and when they divorced,

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Speaker 2: me being the oldest, all the pressure was on me

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Speaker 2: because everybody said, hey, you gotta look out for your momy,

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Speaker 2: you gotta look out for your sisters. So I'm in

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Speaker 2: therapy my first session and that man asked me, how

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Speaker 2: do you feel?

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Speaker 3: Do you know I'm thirty one?

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Speaker 2: Years old and nobody had never I cannot remember. People

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Speaker 2: had asked me how I'm doing, but no one had.

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Speaker 1: Never asked me how I'm feeling.

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Speaker 3: And that's what led me into therapy at that journey.

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Speaker 2: And it's been, Uh, that was I was thirty one,

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Speaker 2: that was thirty one.

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Speaker 3: I'm forty three today. So uh, it's been a journey

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Speaker 3: of healing. It's been. It's been a beautiful journey.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, you know, at times it's still you know, some moments,

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Speaker 2: but I wouldn't take it back for anything.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. Two things, A few things that said out when

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Speaker 1: you were speaking was one, I was successful, Everything was great,

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Speaker 1: but I was depressed a lot of there's a misconception

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Speaker 1: that when your successful, depression can't creep in. Yeah, you know.

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Speaker 1: And then the fact that your godmother was white because

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Speaker 1: a lot of times in African American homes, therapy is

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Speaker 1: not a it's not an option, you know, so to

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Speaker 1: even I wonder if you would have even got to

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Speaker 1: that point without having a white godmother to say, hey,

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Speaker 1: you need to go to therapy, because you wouldn't have

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Speaker 1: gotten that for your mother therapy.

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Speaker 2: No, because I remember when I said to my mom

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Speaker 2: that I was going to therapy.

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Speaker 3: Mama Mary as y'all know her.

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Speaker 2: Mama, I love you, but said to me, you're going

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Speaker 2: to that telling that white man all our business.

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Speaker 1: That's it.

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Speaker 2: I said, I don't give a damn what color he is.

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Speaker 2: I'm trying to get some help. Do you hear me? Yes?

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Speaker 3: And Crystal cannot tell you. It was. Have you seen

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Speaker 3: Aine Fisher?

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Speaker 1: Yes?

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Speaker 2: So I wrote my capstone. I did my capstone on

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Speaker 2: Antone Fisher and the sexual abuse that he you know,

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Speaker 2: end it. It was just like that when he was

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Speaker 2: working with Denzel. Remember it was like three sessions before

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Speaker 2: he opened up. Yes, it was about three sessions before

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Speaker 2: I opened up. Because one I'm like, dang, I don't

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Speaker 2: want to open up to this white man. But that

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Speaker 2: man said to me one day, he said, tell me

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Speaker 2: about your dad, and then he asked me about football.

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Speaker 2: I'm talking about you the thought of Sunumbi, and it

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Speaker 2: broke something. And for the two sessions that I didn't talk,

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Speaker 2: he would literally say it's okay, when you come back

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Speaker 2: next week.

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Speaker 3: I was like, yeah, I come back, bro. I was

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Speaker 3: so reluctant.

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Speaker 2: But when that man asked me and he said, I said, bro,

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Speaker 2: I don't want to talk about it.

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Speaker 3: He said, with you write it down. And I wrote

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Speaker 3: it down and I never forget this.

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Speaker 2: He said, three words that describe what you're feeling now.

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Speaker 2: I said lost, I said inadequate, and I said like

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Speaker 2: a failure. I'll never forget those three words. Never get there,

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Speaker 2: never forget lost, in adequate, and a failure. And man,

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Speaker 2: something just started to break. And he would always say,

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Speaker 2: are you going to come back next week? I'd be like, yeah, man,

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Speaker 2: I'll come back. And I just kept going back, and

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Speaker 2: you know, and it was crazy because nobody in my

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Speaker 2: family and nobody around me. I remember, like my home

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Speaker 2: was like, nigga, you're doing therapy? Are you crazy?

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Speaker 1: Bro right?

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Speaker 2: And I remember one of my homeboys literally just kind

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Speaker 2: of like like, you know, poking, like, nigga, you really

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Speaker 2: think that therapies is working?

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Speaker 3: And I'm like, I don't know.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, But I was curious because I really wanted to

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Speaker 2: let go of the pain because for so long the

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Speaker 2: pain had been a driver in my life. And men

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Speaker 2: don't realize is that if pain becomes a driver in

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Speaker 2: your life, you're going to become one of two things. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: homicidal or suicidal.

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Speaker 1: Wow, that is powerful. I remember this around twenty twenty

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Speaker 1: during COVID was the first time we all had to

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Speaker 1: sit down with ourselves. So for me, that was when

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Speaker 1: I was like, Okay, I need to talk to someone.

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Speaker 1: So I got a therapist and I'm like, this is

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Speaker 1: not working. This is not working. But I was like,

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Speaker 1: your mama, I'm not going to tell you all my business.

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Speaker 1: So I wasn't being honest with the lady and that's

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Speaker 1: why I wasn't working right. So I ended up getting

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Speaker 1: another therapist and finally I was just like, Okay, if

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Speaker 1: I want this to work, I gotta just tell her everything.

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Speaker 1: So I started opening up and I was like, wait,

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Speaker 1: this is like unlocking a lot of things that I

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Speaker 1: didn't even remember. You know what was the first honest

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Speaker 1: thing that you said in a therapy session that really

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Speaker 1: unlocked something?

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Speaker 2: Oooh man, my parents' divorce really hurt me. I walked

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Speaker 2: in the room in my mom's in my parents' bedroom.

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Speaker 3: I will never forget this.

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Speaker 2: I was ten years old and my mom was sitting

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Speaker 2: on the bed crying, and I said to my mom,

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Speaker 2: I knew what was going on. I was a very

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Speaker 2: precocious kid. I knew and I said, why won't you

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Speaker 2: leave ten years old and my mom looks at me

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Speaker 2: and says, God hasn't released me to leave.

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Speaker 3: And I couldn't understand that.

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Speaker 2: And I think when I got to therapy to know

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Speaker 2: how her and my dad was divorcing, because for me,

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Speaker 2: we would go to church on Sunday as a family

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Speaker 2: and Monday through Saturday complete chaos. Wow.

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Speaker 3: So none of that made sense to me.

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Speaker 2: And I think when I really sat down and what

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Speaker 2: really broke in me to really get me to start

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Speaker 2: open up, how much that impacted me as a son,

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Speaker 2: not only to watch what happened with just my father

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Speaker 2: and my mother, but also as a son who had

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Speaker 2: to fill in this gap because I became this standing

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Speaker 2: husband from my mother and then this surrogate father to

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Speaker 2: my sisters, which is also where I learned how to intercede.

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Speaker 3: Because my mom had me praying for her, wow.

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Speaker 2: Because she was like, she was like, can you I

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Speaker 2: remember nice her crying and said can you pray for me?

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Speaker 1: Wow?

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Speaker 2: So I had all of these burdens on me, you know,

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Speaker 2: at such a young age, because I was spiritually gifted,

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Speaker 2: you know, early on in my parents realized that I

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Speaker 2: had this prophetic gift. And you know I was already menacing.

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Speaker 2: I gave my first sermon at the age of nine

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Speaker 2: in front of two hundred people. Wow. So from nine

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Speaker 2: to eleven most people don't notice. Nine to eleven I

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Speaker 2: preached all over Mississippi as a young pheenom preacher kid.

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Speaker 2: And it was how we ate because I was getting paid.

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Speaker 2: And when my parents advorced, I said I would never

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Speaker 2: preach another sermon. Of course, look at you now, listen, Chris,

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Speaker 2: I'm in Canada.

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Speaker 3: I'm in Canada right. Given this keynote.

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Speaker 2: On the empowering and restoring families of the Nova Scotian

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Speaker 2: Unity in Caunada and Halifax.

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Speaker 3: Powerful keynote. This is how you know you can't run.

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Speaker 1: Come on now, talk about it.

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Speaker 2: This lady walked up to me after the keynote, beautiful

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Speaker 2: lady with some beautiful white hair man, black woman, and

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Speaker 2: she said, baby, they heard a doctor.

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Speaker 3: I heard a past. Come on now listen, listen.

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Speaker 2: I look at that lady. I said, ma'am, could you

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Speaker 2: please please? I don't want to hear no more prophetic word.

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Speaker 2: I don't hear nothing. Please don't tell me nothing about

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Speaker 2: no past, no church. But and I know, Lord, you

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Speaker 2: know I love you, and I know you probably called

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Speaker 2: me to that when I'm fifty, but not in this season.

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Speaker 2: But that thing broke something because I couldn't understand at

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Speaker 2: that time why would God break up my family? Because

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Speaker 2: I love seeing my parents. That was nothing more that

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Speaker 2: I love about having a family, And even to this day,

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Speaker 2: it bothers me that I don't have a family.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. Wow, Why do you feel like you don't feel

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Speaker 1: like it's God assignment? Or do you feel like that's

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Speaker 1: just maybe you haven't focused on that? What do you

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Speaker 1: feel is?

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Speaker 3: So I'm gonna bring you into this?

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Speaker 2: Yeah? Yeah, yeah, because because people will look at us, right,

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Speaker 2: they would look at us as if we've arrived. They

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Speaker 2: would look at us as if we've achieved. But the

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Speaker 2: more that you expand, because I believe this for you,

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Speaker 2: as much with you have is as much depth that

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Speaker 2: you have, yes, as as much reach as you have,

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Speaker 2: that's also a level of depth that you have. So

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Speaker 2: dating and trying to build something with the depth that

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Speaker 2: we have is challenging. Yeah, because you also have the insight,

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Speaker 2: hindsight and foresight.

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Speaker 1: Come on, now, hindsight.

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Speaker 3: I know what I've gone through and I've learned from it.

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Speaker 2: The insight is that I have this revelation not only

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Speaker 2: of myself but also what God has given me. And

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Speaker 2: the foresight is that I also see where He's taking me.

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Speaker 2: So I can't yoke up with anybody.

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Speaker 1: I can't.

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Speaker 2: And I know you like me. I know you like

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Speaker 2: the idea of me. I know you like you know

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Speaker 2: what I'm saying, how I smell, how I look. You

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Speaker 2: know what I'm saying. You know you come across you

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Speaker 2: know the stream with this beauty. You know what I'm saying.

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Speaker 2: The teeth popping and their lips are popping, and you

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Speaker 2: got the makeup and the brows, and I got this

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Speaker 2: beautiful dark skin. And you listen at the way that

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Speaker 2: I articulate and the way that I can conceptualize something.

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Speaker 3: But if you have not done work on the level,

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Speaker 3: and not.

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Speaker 2: Just to stand next to us, but to walk with us,

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Speaker 2: it requires so much, so as much as I have

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Speaker 2: to more not having a family, and also understand that

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Speaker 2: because if it ain't equal, I can't yoke up with it. Yeah,

355
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Speaker 2: So to answer your question, so it gives me peace,

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Speaker 2: you know, And and I and I've shared this and

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Speaker 2: I actually talked about this on the dinner kings. Briefly,

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Speaker 2: you know, about five years ago, my girlfriend at the

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Speaker 2: time and I had a miscarriage and that thing broke

360
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Speaker 2: to both of us and U and it was something

361
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Speaker 2: I didn't talk about and it was so crazy because

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Speaker 2: our parents are pastors. And I called her mom and said,

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Speaker 2: can I take you to dinner? Like I want to

364
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Speaker 2: talk to you about something? And you know, I don't

365
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Speaker 2: know why I thought I could hide it from my mom,

366
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Speaker 2: because my mom is like a seer. My mom said, Jay,

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Speaker 2: I knew it. I knew, I knew and I just

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Speaker 2: started to break down because I heard it for her.

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Speaker 2: And then as a man, you know that, I felt

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Speaker 2: like this was my time to you know what I'm saying,

371
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Speaker 2: because you know, we don't talk about miscarriage when it

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Speaker 2: comes to.

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Speaker 1: Men, right, and how it affects you all, Yeah.

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Speaker 3: Because I feel like it.

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Speaker 2: I think it does a number on the woman, on

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Speaker 2: the woman physically, what her body goes through and emotionally,

377
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Speaker 2: and then I think, but it messes with the man

378
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Speaker 2: mentally because I remember the scene of walking in the

379
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Speaker 2: bathroom and I can't it's hard. Even today, I can

380
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Speaker 2: step right into that moment and the picture and it's

381
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Speaker 2: just like I can see her face, I can see

382
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Speaker 2: her complexion, you know, her whole accountant is changing.

383
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Speaker 3: It's like, Jay, what's just happened?

384
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Speaker 2: So I've had to really I've gone back to therapy

385
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Speaker 2: for that and really grieve that I was in therapy

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Speaker 2: all last year grieving that.

387
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Speaker 3: And I'm at a good place.

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Speaker 2: But you know, it's not easy to be who we

389
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Speaker 2: are and to feel like, dang, ain't nobody on my level?

390
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Speaker 3: Right?

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Speaker 1: Yeah? Jay, I don't need to get my business. Okay, listen,

392
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Speaker 1: it's crazy, like you know you are on my street

393
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Speaker 1: right now, because it's it's hard, It's really hard, and

394
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Speaker 1: I don't want to be like on my level, you

395
00:21:24,160 --> 00:21:27,800
Speaker 1: know what I'm saying. But it's like spirits, not just financially, spirually.

396
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Speaker 1: How about I can't be yoked up with just anybody

397
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Speaker 1: that is real? And I was. We had an episode

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Speaker 1: with me, Ashan and West and I was saying, I'm

399
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Speaker 1: tired of leading men like I'm tired of leading financially,

400
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Speaker 1: I'm tired of leading spiritually. I'm tired of leading the household.

401
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Speaker 1: Like I want someone that I can trust to lead

402
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Speaker 1: in the household and always who can lead me to God?

403
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Speaker 1: I'm not the one begging you to come to church

404
00:21:50,960 --> 00:21:53,120
Speaker 1: on Sundays or begging you to I'm the one only

405
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Speaker 1: one up reading the Bible and then the word like

406
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Speaker 1: I need I need to look over or not over

407
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Speaker 1: because I don't even don't you ain't sleeping in the

408
00:21:59,480 --> 00:22:01,600
Speaker 1: house no more. But I need to know that you

409
00:22:01,720 --> 00:22:04,200
Speaker 1: at your house waking up reading your word the same way.

410
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Speaker 1: I am like, all right, we in this thing together

411
00:22:07,280 --> 00:22:10,400
Speaker 1: so that we're both pulling from the same source. Now

412
00:22:10,440 --> 00:22:13,560
Speaker 1: you pulling off of my my resources to the source.

413
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Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying.

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Speaker 3: Listen, let me get one of them cards.

415
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Speaker 2: Listen, we do something on the Just Here podcastle I

416
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Speaker 2: have to tear the car down as the moment you

417
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Speaker 2: are crystal my God today. So I'm glad I'm here

418
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Speaker 2: because I could be transparent. I was dating this girl

419
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Speaker 2: years ago, and to your point, I like, if I'm

420
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Speaker 2: dating you and I have to feel like I have

421
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Speaker 2: to hold back who I am spiritually, I know it's

422
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Speaker 2: not gonna work. Yes, so I go to like when

423
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Speaker 2: I go in my bedroom, it don't take me no

424
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Speaker 2: time to fall asleep because there's such a piece in

425
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Speaker 2: my house.

426
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Speaker 3: You will walk in there and you just fall.

427
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Speaker 1: That's my house is They're like it feels like here's

428
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Speaker 1: z in in here.

429
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Speaker 2: I'm like, that's how here in. My producer CJ was

430
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Speaker 2: at my house a couple of weeks ago. He called me.

431
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Speaker 2: He was like, dang, nigga, I can't stay awake. I said,

432
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Speaker 2: that's exactly what I want and curates me. So I'm

433
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Speaker 2: dating this girl and she stays over, she can't sleep.

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Speaker 1: Was wrestling in your spirit hooded.

435
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Speaker 2: So so I'm like, I wake up. I said, again,

436
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Speaker 2: I'm being transparent open because we had been dating for

437
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Speaker 2: a while and so you know, she was staying over

438
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Speaker 2: and she's always talk about how she had the hard

439
00:23:34,359 --> 00:23:37,280
Speaker 2: time sleeping, and I was just like, listen, I woke up.

440
00:23:37,320 --> 00:23:40,240
Speaker 2: I said, yo, man, you have got because she was turning, tossing,

441
00:23:40,359 --> 00:23:43,560
Speaker 2: turning all night long and I was just like this don't.

442
00:23:43,640 --> 00:23:49,320
Speaker 2: So I get up and I'm I'm I'm used to

443
00:23:49,400 --> 00:23:51,680
Speaker 2: waking up seeing my mother walk the floor and pray.

444
00:23:53,280 --> 00:23:56,320
Speaker 2: So I get up and open my door and I

445
00:23:56,400 --> 00:23:57,880
Speaker 2: go open my patio door.

446
00:23:58,400 --> 00:24:00,560
Speaker 3: I started walking through the house praying.

447
00:24:01,080 --> 00:24:03,720
Speaker 2: And she was just like she wasn't in shock, but

448
00:24:03,840 --> 00:24:07,320
Speaker 2: she was just like I never seen a man pray.

449
00:24:07,480 --> 00:24:10,080
Speaker 2: I said, I don't know what you're wrestling with. And

450
00:24:10,119 --> 00:24:12,800
Speaker 2: I didn't feel like it was a bad spirit on her.

451
00:24:12,800 --> 00:24:13,159
Speaker 1: Something.

452
00:24:13,359 --> 00:24:16,320
Speaker 2: I felt like her anxiety, like she's just like she

453
00:24:16,440 --> 00:24:19,040
Speaker 2: was like she owned her own business and so she

454
00:24:19,160 --> 00:24:20,080
Speaker 2: was just.

455
00:24:19,680 --> 00:24:22,040
Speaker 1: Going, mind, just going, and.

456
00:24:22,000 --> 00:24:24,280
Speaker 2: I just started praying and I said, hey, listen, and

457
00:24:24,600 --> 00:24:27,479
Speaker 2: I told her, I said, listen, I'm I have to

458
00:24:27,520 --> 00:24:30,320
Speaker 2: do this. And I said, if you don't mind, if

459
00:24:30,359 --> 00:24:33,879
Speaker 2: you could just you know, walk with me, or so

460
00:24:33,920 --> 00:24:36,280
Speaker 2: she sat on the couch. I'm going through the house.

461
00:24:36,320 --> 00:24:38,600
Speaker 2: I don't went up in the spirit. I said, I

462
00:24:38,720 --> 00:24:41,359
Speaker 2: have to do this because I got a rest, because

463
00:24:41,359 --> 00:24:43,280
Speaker 2: I got a long day tomorrow and I want you

464
00:24:43,359 --> 00:24:48,600
Speaker 2: to rest. Yeah, And that showed me something because as

465
00:24:48,640 --> 00:24:51,600
Speaker 2: a man, and I want the brothers to hear this. Brother,

466
00:24:51,760 --> 00:24:56,040
Speaker 2: if you can't get to God, if you can't get

467
00:24:56,080 --> 00:25:00,240
Speaker 2: a prayer through, if you can't be vulnerable enough to

468
00:25:00,480 --> 00:25:05,639
Speaker 2: break that stratosphere that him is fear, spiritually, you're doing

469
00:25:05,800 --> 00:25:11,000
Speaker 2: your wife, girl, woman who a disservice, especially if you're

470
00:25:11,080 --> 00:25:14,359
Speaker 2: walking with a woman who's really called to purpose like

471
00:25:14,400 --> 00:25:17,520
Speaker 2: what you're called to, or a woman who's called to

472
00:25:17,560 --> 00:25:18,840
Speaker 2: the purpose of business.

473
00:25:18,880 --> 00:25:21,200
Speaker 3: Healing, finance or whatever.

474
00:25:21,240 --> 00:25:24,560
Speaker 2: It is, like, I really want to see men get

475
00:25:24,600 --> 00:25:26,960
Speaker 2: to a place where we start to carry off.

476
00:25:27,160 --> 00:25:28,160
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah.

477
00:25:29,320 --> 00:25:32,680
Speaker 2: Me and my mother talk about this and I told

478
00:25:32,760 --> 00:25:38,480
Speaker 2: I said, you know, watching you, you've carried every marriage.

479
00:25:41,160 --> 00:25:42,960
Speaker 1: Do you think it's do you think that not to

480
00:25:42,960 --> 00:25:45,440
Speaker 1: intrust you? But do you feel like because black men

481
00:25:45,480 --> 00:25:47,239
Speaker 1: have seen their moms do it, they just feel like

482
00:25:47,440 --> 00:25:49,040
Speaker 1: this is what you're supposed to do as a woman.

483
00:25:50,080 --> 00:25:53,080
Speaker 2: I think brothers don't even know what it's like to

484
00:25:53,160 --> 00:25:55,600
Speaker 2: carry a woman because they've never seen a man really

485
00:25:55,640 --> 00:25:56,879
Speaker 2: stand in.

486
00:25:58,880 --> 00:25:59,560
Speaker 3: The position.

487
00:25:59,800 --> 00:26:02,160
Speaker 2: And as a leader, I feel like men should be

488
00:26:03,080 --> 00:26:07,560
Speaker 2: a prophet. You should be able to speak over your spouse,

489
00:26:07,920 --> 00:26:10,000
Speaker 2: your woman. And this is why I'm waiting on God,

490
00:26:10,000 --> 00:26:18,399
Speaker 2: because I don't spoke over too many folks out of

491
00:26:18,480 --> 00:26:22,119
Speaker 2: prophesied of business, out of spoke life. I would have

492
00:26:22,200 --> 00:26:24,480
Speaker 2: got you in the gym. You done, w got the

493
00:26:24,560 --> 00:26:26,400
Speaker 2: business loan. I ain't doing that no more.

494
00:26:28,080 --> 00:26:30,879
Speaker 1: Look at all this, look at the fruits like the

495
00:26:30,920 --> 00:26:32,159
Speaker 1: fruits of my prayers.

496
00:26:33,240 --> 00:26:37,639
Speaker 2: Listen out of prophesiede. I'm a priest. I feel like

497
00:26:37,920 --> 00:26:40,760
Speaker 2: you have to be a pro a promoter. You gotta

498
00:26:40,760 --> 00:26:42,919
Speaker 2: be able to push and you got to be a

499
00:26:42,960 --> 00:26:45,320
Speaker 2: provider and a protect I'm gonna say that again, brothers,

500
00:26:45,359 --> 00:26:47,880
Speaker 2: and then for the ladies, because I know y'all, y'all,

501
00:26:47,960 --> 00:26:52,840
Speaker 2: y'all love my friend. He has to be a prophet.

502
00:26:53,160 --> 00:26:55,119
Speaker 2: He should be able to speak into your life. He

503
00:26:55,240 --> 00:26:57,320
Speaker 2: has to be a priest. He should be able to cover.

504
00:26:58,320 --> 00:27:01,720
Speaker 2: He has to be a protect there. He should be

505
00:27:01,760 --> 00:27:04,960
Speaker 2: able to provide a sense of security for you. He

506
00:27:05,119 --> 00:27:08,720
Speaker 2: has to be a provider. And I'm not just talking

507
00:27:08,720 --> 00:27:13,120
Speaker 2: about financially. Do you provide insight? And then a promoter,

508
00:27:13,600 --> 00:27:17,360
Speaker 2: can you push me? Can you encourage me? The amount

509
00:27:17,520 --> 00:27:19,760
Speaker 2: of I have a lot of female friends that are

510
00:27:19,840 --> 00:27:23,320
Speaker 2: so amazing, the amount of the amount of them that

511
00:27:23,359 --> 00:27:27,040
Speaker 2: are in relationship with men that are jealous of them.

512
00:27:27,240 --> 00:27:34,240
Speaker 1: And the church is saying amen, the congregation is running it.

513
00:27:34,520 --> 00:27:35,919
Speaker 1: They're running laps around the building.

514
00:27:41,720 --> 00:27:45,040
Speaker 2: I don't get it. I don't get it. And it

515
00:27:45,080 --> 00:27:50,400
Speaker 2: breaks my heart because I'm like, because I've gone through that,

516
00:27:50,640 --> 00:27:52,919
Speaker 2: you know, but I don't get it because of the

517
00:27:52,960 --> 00:27:55,560
Speaker 2: way I pour it into my sisters and the way

518
00:27:55,600 --> 00:27:58,200
Speaker 2: I pour it to my entire team is black women,

519
00:27:59,400 --> 00:28:04,000
Speaker 2: from my publicist to my admin, and.

520
00:28:03,760 --> 00:28:06,840
Speaker 3: They'll I speak lifing in it. You know what I mean?

521
00:28:06,880 --> 00:28:10,720
Speaker 2: And I said, listen, whoever you date, he don't have

522
00:28:10,800 --> 00:28:14,359
Speaker 2: to be me, but I hope he embodied what you

523
00:28:14,400 --> 00:28:16,800
Speaker 2: guys have seen through. Yes, you know what I mean,

524
00:28:16,840 --> 00:28:20,800
Speaker 2: to speak life into you. They called me my admin Christie.

525
00:28:20,880 --> 00:28:22,600
Speaker 2: She called me a day she got a speaking gear

526
00:28:22,720 --> 00:28:25,400
Speaker 2: for like ten k She's like, bro, you ain't gonna

527
00:28:25,400 --> 00:28:28,120
Speaker 2: bleed this. And I said, what did I tell you?

528
00:28:28,119 --> 00:28:32,480
Speaker 2: You just had to believe that you were Yes, I

529
00:28:32,520 --> 00:28:35,840
Speaker 2: said you had. I knew you were her, And just

530
00:28:35,840 --> 00:28:39,160
Speaker 2: to see her and the rest of my people that

531
00:28:39,240 --> 00:28:42,520
Speaker 2: believe in me and to be reinforced because I can't

532
00:28:42,640 --> 00:28:47,240
Speaker 2: stand to see this attack on black women that are

533
00:28:47,280 --> 00:28:50,640
Speaker 2: really doing something. And you guys get made to feel

534
00:28:50,680 --> 00:28:53,239
Speaker 2: because my sisters I pushed the hell out of them.

535
00:28:53,600 --> 00:28:56,800
Speaker 2: They get tired and they married with men, great men,

536
00:28:56,960 --> 00:29:00,720
Speaker 2: and they husband embrace it. Yes, like hey, they'll call

537
00:29:00,840 --> 00:29:04,720
Speaker 2: me hey, brother law she's slacking, you know what I'm saying.

538
00:29:04,840 --> 00:29:06,320
Speaker 3: So I don't I don't get that.

539
00:29:06,440 --> 00:29:09,160
Speaker 2: So I really wanted to give that to the sisters,

540
00:29:09,200 --> 00:29:12,880
Speaker 2: like do not give your pearls to swine and to

541
00:29:13,000 --> 00:29:16,600
Speaker 2: the brothers, the brothers, because there are some brothers that

542
00:29:16,640 --> 00:29:20,360
Speaker 2: are doing things and sometimes because I again, I can

543
00:29:20,360 --> 00:29:22,040
Speaker 2: be honest, I've laid in the lout in the in

544
00:29:22,080 --> 00:29:26,000
Speaker 2: the lap of a Delilah who took who I was,

545
00:29:27,200 --> 00:29:31,160
Speaker 2: took what I shared and explored it. You know what

546
00:29:31,160 --> 00:29:35,680
Speaker 2: I'm saying. So I'm talking to me as well. Yeah,

547
00:29:35,720 --> 00:29:39,760
Speaker 2: I know I'm a good thing, a good brother. So yeah, man,

548
00:29:40,360 --> 00:29:46,000
Speaker 2: we we we we have too much. Uh we we

549
00:29:46,080 --> 00:29:48,880
Speaker 2: have to too much of a greatness in us man

550
00:29:48,960 --> 00:29:53,480
Speaker 2: to just And And I told God the other day,

551
00:29:52,520 --> 00:29:56,360
Speaker 2: I said, Lord, I've been on the road for three

552
00:29:56,360 --> 00:29:58,760
Speaker 2: weeks and I and I said that I called my

553
00:29:58,760 --> 00:30:00,360
Speaker 2: my my my thing therapist.

554
00:30:01,800 --> 00:30:03,320
Speaker 3: Thank God for doctor town.

555
00:30:05,400 --> 00:30:07,960
Speaker 2: No, I have a different therapist now, different therapists because

556
00:30:07,960 --> 00:30:10,240
Speaker 2: I feel like there's as seasons change.

557
00:30:10,360 --> 00:30:10,760
Speaker 1: That's good.

558
00:30:11,360 --> 00:30:13,360
Speaker 2: You shouldn't you know, you shouldn't always have the same

559
00:30:13,440 --> 00:30:15,760
Speaker 2: therapists because your season would change. And I feel like

560
00:30:16,280 --> 00:30:19,760
Speaker 2: certain people are are called to walk with you in

561
00:30:19,800 --> 00:30:22,840
Speaker 2: different seasons. Doctor Towns is like a sixty some of

562
00:30:22,920 --> 00:30:24,680
Speaker 2: the old black woman. I go to see her in

563
00:30:24,720 --> 00:30:28,480
Speaker 2: San Diego. I get by the water. She's a psychologist

564
00:30:28,520 --> 00:30:32,280
Speaker 2: and she's spirit led, intelligent and all the things. And

565
00:30:32,320 --> 00:30:35,960
Speaker 2: I called and I said, Doc I'm lonely. I know

566
00:30:36,000 --> 00:30:38,160
Speaker 2: I'm not alone, but I'm alone.

567
00:30:38,160 --> 00:30:39,480
Speaker 1: There's a difference, yes.

568
00:30:39,600 --> 00:30:42,320
Speaker 2: And she said what about? I said, Doc, I'm on

569
00:30:42,400 --> 00:30:46,400
Speaker 2: this road man, pouring and pouring, and it's like, yeah,

570
00:30:46,440 --> 00:30:49,480
Speaker 2: I can call people, but the talents with us and

571
00:30:49,760 --> 00:30:52,360
Speaker 2: I don't know. You may like you'll be talking to somebody.

572
00:30:52,400 --> 00:30:54,800
Speaker 2: They good people, but ain't nothing there.

573
00:30:54,920 --> 00:30:58,680
Speaker 1: Man, story of my life? How do you do?

574
00:30:58,760 --> 00:31:02,160
Speaker 2: I got to ask you, how do you process that

575
00:31:02,640 --> 00:31:03,880
Speaker 2: when it's time to kind.

576
00:31:03,680 --> 00:31:08,920
Speaker 1: Of let it go? Yeah, listen, I'm really good at

577
00:31:08,920 --> 00:31:11,320
Speaker 1: seeing as I've gotten old. I'm really good at seeing

578
00:31:11,320 --> 00:31:14,720
Speaker 1: it before it gets too far. And honestly, I just

579
00:31:14,760 --> 00:31:17,840
Speaker 1: had a situation and I was on a trip. I

580
00:31:17,840 --> 00:31:22,040
Speaker 1: was on the water in Italy and God literally said

581
00:31:22,040 --> 00:31:24,440
Speaker 1: to me. I was wrestling with it, like it might

582
00:31:24,440 --> 00:31:27,800
Speaker 1: supposed to end this because it's not there. The alignment

583
00:31:27,880 --> 00:31:31,040
Speaker 1: isn't there. And God said, how many times have you

584
00:31:31,120 --> 00:31:33,880
Speaker 1: prayed God give me a sign and you felt the

585
00:31:33,880 --> 00:31:36,320
Speaker 1: feelings that you're feeling now and you ignored it? And

586
00:31:36,360 --> 00:31:38,040
Speaker 1: he was like, or you ignored it and you went

587
00:31:38,080 --> 00:31:40,600
Speaker 1: on and then something happened. I showed you what I

588
00:31:40,680 --> 00:31:42,720
Speaker 1: was trying to tell you from the beginning, and you're like,

589
00:31:42,840 --> 00:31:46,000
Speaker 1: I knew, I felt that in my gut. He said,

590
00:31:46,040 --> 00:31:48,120
Speaker 1: I need you to listen to it. Now. Don't make

591
00:31:48,160 --> 00:31:50,880
Speaker 1: the same mistake of not hearing my voice and going

592
00:31:50,920 --> 00:31:52,720
Speaker 1: through it all over again and getting hurt and then

593
00:31:52,760 --> 00:31:56,000
Speaker 1: looking back, like, Lord, you told me that September the fourteenth,

594
00:31:56,120 --> 00:31:58,280
Speaker 1: twenty twenty five, and I didn't listen.

595
00:31:58,480 --> 00:31:58,920
Speaker 3: Wow.

596
00:31:58,960 --> 00:32:01,280
Speaker 1: So I had to like really just start being obedient

597
00:32:01,320 --> 00:32:03,440
Speaker 1: to that intuition that he gave me to say all right,

598
00:32:03,680 --> 00:32:06,480
Speaker 1: and I just was honest. I'm brutally honest at this age.

599
00:32:06,520 --> 00:32:08,840
Speaker 1: I'm like, it's just not there.

600
00:32:09,080 --> 00:32:12,360
Speaker 3: Yeah, man, listen, listen, listen. I got to make a

601
00:32:12,400 --> 00:32:13,400
Speaker 3: couple of phone calls.

602
00:32:16,680 --> 00:32:18,920
Speaker 1: Listen. But being honest it actually frees you.

603
00:32:19,000 --> 00:32:21,960
Speaker 2: And because it's like and they're not bad people, but

604
00:32:22,400 --> 00:32:28,200
Speaker 2: like like I had to be honest.

605
00:32:28,880 --> 00:32:29,240
Speaker 3: Uh.

606
00:32:29,480 --> 00:32:34,880
Speaker 2: And Bishop Jake's Bishop. I was sitting with him and

607
00:32:34,960 --> 00:32:37,960
Speaker 2: Bishop called me out and Bishop.

608
00:32:37,640 --> 00:32:41,920
Speaker 3: Said, you have got to stop acting like you are regular.

609
00:32:47,200 --> 00:32:51,520
Speaker 2: He said, that's your biggest challenge, Jake. And he said,

610
00:32:51,600 --> 00:32:53,840
Speaker 2: you have because like when I telling you what what

611
00:32:53,880 --> 00:32:55,840
Speaker 2: God is doing in my life, I didn't I didn't

612
00:32:55,880 --> 00:32:58,120
Speaker 2: want it. I didn't ask for it. I heard God

613
00:32:58,200 --> 00:33:04,360
Speaker 2: tell me after the pandemic. He told me, men, I'm calling.

614
00:33:04,080 --> 00:33:04,600
Speaker 3: You to men.

615
00:33:05,440 --> 00:33:08,880
Speaker 2: Then he said, I'm getting ready to expose you to

616
00:33:08,920 --> 00:33:12,600
Speaker 2: the world. I'm getting ready to reveal you, reveal you

617
00:33:12,720 --> 00:33:13,360
Speaker 2: to the world.

618
00:33:14,240 --> 00:33:17,640
Speaker 3: And long after that, not long after.

619
00:33:17,040 --> 00:33:19,360
Speaker 2: That, Taraji people called me and I went on the

620
00:33:19,360 --> 00:33:21,680
Speaker 2: breakfast club with her virtually and then I mean it

621
00:33:21,880 --> 00:33:24,960
Speaker 2: just took off. So I wasn't asking for it. I

622
00:33:25,080 --> 00:33:28,280
Speaker 2: was wanted to stay hidden because part of me remaining

623
00:33:28,360 --> 00:33:30,880
Speaker 2: hitting was Also I felt like I was secure this

624
00:33:33,200 --> 00:33:37,640
Speaker 2: because when God gives you a platform. I heard my brother.

625
00:33:37,760 --> 00:33:40,560
Speaker 2: I'm give him credit because I heard it from him.

626
00:33:40,600 --> 00:33:44,320
Speaker 2: Stevie Bragg's STEVIEE. Bag said, the bigger the audience, the

627
00:33:44,360 --> 00:33:48,320
Speaker 2: bigger the audit. So as you are seen more, you

628
00:33:48,400 --> 00:33:52,200
Speaker 2: got more eyes on you, the window of error, and

629
00:33:52,280 --> 00:33:55,840
Speaker 2: then everybody got all these opinions, and I feel like

630
00:33:55,920 --> 00:33:59,240
Speaker 2: we live in a world where opinions cannibalize the truth.

631
00:33:59,880 --> 00:34:02,640
Speaker 2: You got all of this stress and pressure because you

632
00:34:02,720 --> 00:34:03,920
Speaker 2: and I we just can't go on.

633
00:34:03,880 --> 00:34:07,400
Speaker 1: A date, no right, even like it could be something

634
00:34:07,520 --> 00:34:09,360
Speaker 1: simple as like I was just feeling a movie and

635
00:34:09,480 --> 00:34:12,560
Speaker 1: he'saon and I was like, I want to my cast man.

636
00:34:12,600 --> 00:34:13,880
Speaker 1: I was like, let's go grab and it's like you

637
00:34:13,920 --> 00:34:15,760
Speaker 1: can't because then the eyes like, oh they.

638
00:34:15,600 --> 00:34:18,240
Speaker 2: Go together, and it's like exact because you got It's.

639
00:34:18,080 --> 00:34:20,400
Speaker 1: Like you can't. Like literally, I have to think about

640
00:34:20,520 --> 00:34:21,720
Speaker 1: every single movie.

641
00:34:21,840 --> 00:34:23,239
Speaker 3: You are so blessed me right now.

642
00:34:23,400 --> 00:34:26,719
Speaker 2: Because I talked to CJ about this, I'm like, when

643
00:34:26,719 --> 00:34:28,880
Speaker 2: people like, hey, Jake, can you I said, I can't,

644
00:34:28,920 --> 00:34:33,160
Speaker 2: because if I talk to somebody, if it goes past

645
00:34:33,239 --> 00:34:36,200
Speaker 2: couple of weeks, it's like, oh, we locked in together

646
00:34:36,239 --> 00:34:41,200
Speaker 2: real and me, I'm talking because I'm feeling, you know

647
00:34:41,239 --> 00:34:43,800
Speaker 2: what I'm saying, and you know it ain't no physical stuff.

648
00:34:43,840 --> 00:34:47,120
Speaker 2: It's like I'm feeling and I'm sensed because I'm not

649
00:34:47,160 --> 00:34:51,120
Speaker 2: a person who I don't use my my doctorate, I

650
00:34:51,160 --> 00:34:53,799
Speaker 2: don't use my therapy. I don't come in there trying

651
00:34:53,840 --> 00:34:56,880
Speaker 2: to clinical line or therapiize anybody.

652
00:34:56,520 --> 00:34:58,480
Speaker 1: Because I would thank you'd be like that. I'm probably

653
00:34:58,480 --> 00:34:59,560
Speaker 1: be therapying his girl.

654
00:34:59,680 --> 00:35:02,759
Speaker 3: Oh no, oh never, never, Thank God.

655
00:35:02,800 --> 00:35:04,560
Speaker 2: My ex we have such a great friendship and she

656
00:35:04,719 --> 00:35:08,600
Speaker 2: always remind me, she says, Jay, and I love her man.

657
00:35:08,640 --> 00:35:10,759
Speaker 2: She She's such a good, great friend of mine, and

658
00:35:10,800 --> 00:35:13,880
Speaker 2: she says, Jay, what I love about you is you

659
00:35:13,960 --> 00:35:15,759
Speaker 2: never brought work in our relationship.

660
00:35:16,440 --> 00:35:16,680
Speaker 3: Never.

661
00:35:17,640 --> 00:35:22,000
Speaker 2: I never used a clinical term like like.

662
00:35:21,920 --> 00:35:23,080
Speaker 3: If we had a conflict.

663
00:35:23,120 --> 00:35:25,839
Speaker 2: I never said you gassed, like like all these people

664
00:35:25,960 --> 00:35:29,239
Speaker 2: use all these like a real clinician like we don't

665
00:35:29,400 --> 00:35:32,360
Speaker 2: like I'm not trying to diagnose nobody to analyze. A

666
00:35:32,600 --> 00:35:34,880
Speaker 2: matter of fact, Negro, I'm not even thinking about you.

667
00:35:36,280 --> 00:35:39,400
Speaker 2: And I appreciate her sharing that because I'm Jay.

668
00:35:40,120 --> 00:35:41,239
Speaker 3: I'm not doctor j R.

669
00:35:41,560 --> 00:35:41,799
Speaker 2: Wow.

670
00:35:42,200 --> 00:35:42,840
Speaker 3: You know what I'm saying.

671
00:35:43,040 --> 00:35:45,960
Speaker 2: You're not you know, what's the carrying fatage? You're not

672
00:35:46,040 --> 00:35:49,040
Speaker 2: like I'm a real person. And so if something hurt

673
00:35:49,080 --> 00:35:52,000
Speaker 2: me or there was something that was said, I was like, yo,

674
00:35:53,440 --> 00:35:54,719
Speaker 2: you know that that wasn't cool.

675
00:35:55,520 --> 00:35:58,359
Speaker 3: I didn't say I feel.

676
00:35:58,080 --> 00:36:01,160
Speaker 2: Like, you know you're that die and it's a messing

677
00:36:01,239 --> 00:36:03,840
Speaker 2: with my mental health. I never like, I like, I can't.

678
00:36:04,280 --> 00:36:08,880
Speaker 2: I don't even listen. I listen. Chris is pulling it

679
00:36:08,880 --> 00:36:13,600
Speaker 2: out of me that I was just be honest, I don't.

680
00:36:13,760 --> 00:36:16,200
Speaker 2: There's a lot of people that a therapists and clinical

681
00:36:16,320 --> 00:36:18,279
Speaker 2: clinicians that have you know, I don't know if you

682
00:36:18,280 --> 00:36:21,640
Speaker 2: call it shooting your shadow or they said they're available.

683
00:36:22,080 --> 00:36:24,440
Speaker 2: I'm not even interested in dating somebody work in the

684
00:36:24,440 --> 00:36:27,520
Speaker 2: field of a lot of people weird.

685
00:36:29,960 --> 00:36:33,399
Speaker 1: No, people be weird, Jay, people, a lot of people,

686
00:36:33,440 --> 00:36:35,880
Speaker 1: not even just therapists, people weird.

687
00:36:35,960 --> 00:36:36,160
Speaker 3: Man.

688
00:36:37,160 --> 00:36:39,839
Speaker 2: So when they like doc, you so close off because

689
00:36:39,880 --> 00:36:42,239
Speaker 2: you all are weird. And then if you hear me

690
00:36:42,280 --> 00:36:45,880
Speaker 2: say nigga, you just like like, or you hear me

691
00:36:45,920 --> 00:36:51,000
Speaker 2: say something that's not, you know, associated with my internal

692
00:36:51,040 --> 00:36:54,560
Speaker 2: degrees or with this idea of this image. Like I'm

693
00:36:54,560 --> 00:36:56,560
Speaker 2: a real person and I'm not always talking about.

694
00:36:56,360 --> 00:36:59,439
Speaker 1: Mental health, right right, There's more to you.

695
00:37:00,560 --> 00:37:02,960
Speaker 2: So I'm like, man, you know, so when you talk

696
00:37:03,000 --> 00:37:05,279
Speaker 2: about that truth thing, Man, I'm like, Man, I.

697
00:37:07,960 --> 00:37:11,560
Speaker 3: Just told God, I said, bab brother, listen, I'm forty three.

698
00:37:11,640 --> 00:37:11,799
Speaker 1: Man.

699
00:37:11,840 --> 00:37:14,320
Speaker 3: I'm like, Man, could you please like shure.

700
00:37:16,360 --> 00:37:16,560
Speaker 2: Yoh?

701
00:37:16,760 --> 00:37:19,279
Speaker 1: Jay? Literally you hit me on my Actually, it was

702
00:37:19,280 --> 00:37:21,360
Speaker 1: the day you hit me right with my birthday. I

703
00:37:21,400 --> 00:37:24,319
Speaker 1: was playing it in Miami and you said in an

704
00:37:24,320 --> 00:37:29,680
Speaker 1: incredibly beautiful prayer via DM and that morning I had

705
00:37:29,680 --> 00:37:31,760
Speaker 1: wrote in my journal it was a day before my birthday,

706
00:37:31,760 --> 00:37:34,640
Speaker 1: and I said God, I was like, I'm ready if

707
00:37:34,680 --> 00:37:36,640
Speaker 1: you think I'm ready, because the times I thought I

708
00:37:36,719 --> 00:37:39,200
Speaker 1: was ready, I wasn't ready because like I'm the type

709
00:37:39,200 --> 00:37:41,720
Speaker 1: of person where I'll be ready and I'll be open

710
00:37:41,840 --> 00:37:44,040
Speaker 1: and then they just get on my nerves. I'm like,

711
00:37:45,280 --> 00:37:47,719
Speaker 1: oh my gosh. It's like i want somebody that I

712
00:37:47,719 --> 00:37:50,080
Speaker 1: can share space with and be like, this is really

713
00:37:50,080 --> 00:37:50,600
Speaker 1: my homie.

714
00:37:50,680 --> 00:37:53,040
Speaker 2: I'm gonna tell you this, and I'm just getting this download.

715
00:37:53,080 --> 00:37:57,279
Speaker 2: You'll see her and even now I'm hearing trust what

716
00:37:57,320 --> 00:37:57,680
Speaker 2: you see?

717
00:37:57,840 --> 00:37:59,640
Speaker 3: Yes on everything.

718
00:37:59,320 --> 00:38:04,920
Speaker 1: On everything, everything, everything, bro, because you'd be having the

719
00:38:05,120 --> 00:38:10,160
Speaker 1: answers before there is a question. Jane, I've had dreams.

720
00:38:10,320 --> 00:38:12,120
Speaker 1: I just had a friend come to me and he

721
00:38:12,160 --> 00:38:14,359
Speaker 1: said I had told him one night I woke up

722
00:38:14,360 --> 00:38:15,680
Speaker 1: and I said, I had a dream that you were

723
00:38:16,080 --> 00:38:18,879
Speaker 1: in this girl's room. This was probably three years ago.

724
00:38:19,520 --> 00:38:21,439
Speaker 1: He said, I knew that I couldn't play with you.

725
00:38:21,640 --> 00:38:22,839
Speaker 1: And I said, what are you talking about. He said,

726
00:38:22,840 --> 00:38:24,479
Speaker 1: I was in her room that night you had that dream.

727
00:38:24,520 --> 00:38:27,360
Speaker 1: I said, you are lying to me. Then my assistant

728
00:38:27,800 --> 00:38:30,360
Speaker 1: sorry to call you out. Herman. Herman was like, he said,

729
00:38:30,480 --> 00:38:32,000
Speaker 1: you did the same thing to me the other day.

730
00:38:32,120 --> 00:38:34,440
Speaker 1: I said yeah. I was like, I just had this feeling,

731
00:38:34,440 --> 00:38:36,399
Speaker 1: like randomly that you were going to get like offered

732
00:38:36,440 --> 00:38:38,600
Speaker 1: another job. He said, Crystal, He's like, I got offered

733
00:38:38,600 --> 00:38:40,479
Speaker 1: a job that day that you said that. He said

734
00:38:40,520 --> 00:38:43,880
Speaker 1: it scared me and I was like, so.

735
00:38:44,600 --> 00:38:46,360
Speaker 2: I'm glad you're doing this because I'm gonna let the

736
00:38:46,360 --> 00:38:50,560
Speaker 2: spirit shift this the challenge because I have a prophetic

737
00:38:50,560 --> 00:38:54,279
Speaker 2: gift and you are seer. I'm gonna say this, I'm

738
00:38:54,360 --> 00:38:57,000
Speaker 2: going to pray that God send somebody to see for you,

739
00:38:59,080 --> 00:39:04,000
Speaker 2: because with us is we can see for everybody but ourselves.

740
00:39:06,120 --> 00:39:11,520
Speaker 2: Like I'm like, I mean yeah, and sometimes I'm like,

741
00:39:11,600 --> 00:39:13,239
Speaker 2: but God, I can't see for me.

742
00:39:13,520 --> 00:39:14,239
Speaker 3: You know what I'm saying.

743
00:39:14,880 --> 00:39:18,359
Speaker 2: But I also feel that in this season that God

744
00:39:18,440 --> 00:39:21,560
Speaker 2: has you in, He's also given you the confidence to

745
00:39:21,760 --> 00:39:23,160
Speaker 2: not second guess what.

746
00:39:23,120 --> 00:39:26,560
Speaker 1: You see and feel he really is he is.

747
00:39:26,480 --> 00:39:31,040
Speaker 2: And to stand on business. I'm sorry, but when because

748
00:39:33,160 --> 00:39:34,120
Speaker 2: if I would have?

749
00:39:35,239 --> 00:39:37,240
Speaker 3: That was my biggest challenge because.

750
00:39:38,600 --> 00:39:42,680
Speaker 2: My parents knew that I was prophetic and they had

751
00:39:42,719 --> 00:39:48,600
Speaker 2: me with people who could, you know, really really shape

752
00:39:48,600 --> 00:39:53,359
Speaker 2: my gift because I hated it because I always was

753
00:39:54,120 --> 00:39:56,759
Speaker 2: right or the spirit was right. Yeah, And so I

754
00:39:56,760 --> 00:39:58,880
Speaker 2: didn't pick my gift back up until I was like

755
00:39:58,960 --> 00:40:02,520
Speaker 2: thirty five. A prophet here in Atlanta that took me

756
00:40:02,600 --> 00:40:04,640
Speaker 2: under his wings, and man I gave that man hell,

757
00:40:06,480 --> 00:40:08,879
Speaker 2: because he kept telling me. He was like, he's like, yeah,

758
00:40:08,920 --> 00:40:10,600
Speaker 2: you're going to school to be a therapist. But this

759
00:40:10,719 --> 00:40:13,640
Speaker 2: man said, you're a therapist in the disguise of a prophet.

760
00:40:14,239 --> 00:40:14,400
Speaker 3: You know.

761
00:40:14,480 --> 00:40:16,800
Speaker 2: He said, you're a prophet in the disguise of a therapist.

762
00:40:17,239 --> 00:40:21,839
Speaker 2: And so it I second guessed so much, and then

763
00:40:22,120 --> 00:40:24,040
Speaker 2: when I would be right, I was in the I

764
00:40:24,120 --> 00:40:29,040
Speaker 2: was it was already too late. Like, man, I dated

765
00:40:29,080 --> 00:40:31,120
Speaker 2: a girl and I'm not gonna get in this because

766
00:40:31,120 --> 00:40:33,279
Speaker 2: I don't even want to get hurt, this this type

767
00:40:33,280 --> 00:40:38,200
Speaker 2: of energy. But it cost me two years of agony

768
00:40:38,200 --> 00:40:41,359
Speaker 2: and pain. But God told me so I wouldn't break

769
00:40:41,440 --> 00:40:44,400
Speaker 2: up with her. I'm sitting at her house, sitting on

770
00:40:44,480 --> 00:40:47,279
Speaker 2: the living room floor, and God said, I'm getting ready

771
00:40:47,280 --> 00:40:50,200
Speaker 2: to shift this. This is like right before Christmas. The

772
00:40:50,280 --> 00:40:53,880
Speaker 2: girl takes sick. I basically was caring for her for

773
00:40:53,920 --> 00:40:59,839
Speaker 2: like several weeks and don't know, don't couldn't figure it out,

774
00:41:00,920 --> 00:41:04,280
Speaker 2: and I mean, and I never forget. When she got better,

775
00:41:06,000 --> 00:41:08,040
Speaker 2: she says, I think I'm falling out of love with you.

776
00:41:08,920 --> 00:41:12,440
Speaker 2: And I was like, wait a minute, I've been bathing you.

777
00:41:14,920 --> 00:41:18,760
Speaker 2: But God was ripping that thing apart because my manager,

778
00:41:20,640 --> 00:41:26,200
Speaker 2: Crystal had told me she said twelve. She called me twelve,

779
00:41:26,200 --> 00:41:29,760
Speaker 2: she said twelve. I don't think you should date that girl.

780
00:41:30,239 --> 00:41:32,600
Speaker 2: I don't have a good feeling. And my manager at

781
00:41:32,600 --> 00:41:37,239
Speaker 2: the time, it's a seer as well. When all this

782
00:41:37,280 --> 00:41:41,880
Speaker 2: stuff happened and this girl, I mean went on just

783
00:41:41,960 --> 00:41:45,640
Speaker 2: a tyrant, my manager called me. She stopped managing me.

784
00:41:45,800 --> 00:41:50,040
Speaker 2: She said, I can't manage you anymore because I'm afraid

785
00:41:50,040 --> 00:41:52,440
Speaker 2: of what's going to happen with this and exactly what

786
00:41:52,480 --> 00:41:55,120
Speaker 2: she told me. And I was so disobedient, but then

787
00:41:55,160 --> 00:41:57,759
Speaker 2: God was telling me. But I felt because this is

788
00:41:57,800 --> 00:41:59,760
Speaker 2: the other thing too, I would say this to people,

789
00:42:00,960 --> 00:42:03,080
Speaker 2: stop saying yes to people.

790
00:42:03,200 --> 00:42:04,480
Speaker 3: And we haven't ran it by God.

791
00:42:04,800 --> 00:42:07,480
Speaker 2: But I've had to learn is go before God first

792
00:42:07,640 --> 00:42:14,400
Speaker 2: with everything everything, even in my business. God like this this,

793
00:42:14,400 --> 00:42:17,319
Speaker 2: this this retreat that I did, I said, God, how

794
00:42:17,320 --> 00:42:17,920
Speaker 2: do you feel?

795
00:42:18,000 --> 00:42:21,040
Speaker 3: And I felt they okay? In it spirit, you know

796
00:42:21,080 --> 00:42:21,440
Speaker 3: what I mean.

797
00:42:21,480 --> 00:42:24,480
Speaker 2: So because normally what we do is humans, we make

798
00:42:24,520 --> 00:42:26,839
Speaker 2: God decision, then we take it to God. Yeah, He's

799
00:42:26,880 --> 00:42:30,520
Speaker 2: a last resort. And then with the itch fall apart, You've.

800
00:42:30,440 --> 00:42:33,239
Speaker 1: Been like, oh man, that's so real, Jay, because even

801
00:42:33,280 --> 00:42:35,400
Speaker 1: with this live show, that we're doing in DC. We

802
00:42:35,400 --> 00:42:37,239
Speaker 1: were thinking of guests and they were like, did you

803
00:42:37,239 --> 00:42:39,799
Speaker 1: call someone so because we'll throw our names and I'm like, oh,

804
00:42:39,800 --> 00:42:41,520
Speaker 1: I know them. Did you call him? And I was like, no,

805
00:42:41,560 --> 00:42:43,000
Speaker 1: I didn't call him. And then I told that. Shanna

806
00:42:43,040 --> 00:42:45,760
Speaker 1: Wandal was like, God hasn't like it's not having settled

807
00:42:45,840 --> 00:42:48,080
Speaker 1: on my heart that this is the person. And I

808
00:42:48,120 --> 00:42:49,799
Speaker 1: was like, so I can't. I can't say that I

809
00:42:49,840 --> 00:42:52,080
Speaker 1: can't call him. He would not let me call certain people.

810
00:42:52,280 --> 00:42:53,520
Speaker 3: That's how I be choosing my guest.

811
00:42:53,640 --> 00:42:55,960
Speaker 2: I've have people that will say, hey, doctor j it's

812
00:42:55,960 --> 00:42:58,440
Speaker 2: such and such, and they was like, what is your protocol?

813
00:42:58,640 --> 00:43:02,200
Speaker 2: I said, it's a god thing. Yeah, because I need

814
00:43:02,239 --> 00:43:06,040
Speaker 2: people to experience healing for real and not just because

815
00:43:06,040 --> 00:43:08,160
Speaker 2: you want to get on here and tell your story exactly.

816
00:43:08,800 --> 00:43:09,360
Speaker 1: That is.

817
00:43:11,320 --> 00:43:13,320
Speaker 3: You all right with you?

818
00:43:13,360 --> 00:43:14,040
Speaker 1: All right with me?

819
00:43:14,840 --> 00:43:15,280
Speaker 2: Listen?

820
00:43:16,400 --> 00:43:22,120
Speaker 1: Wow, this is crazy, so much synergy faith. It clearly

821
00:43:22,239 --> 00:43:24,560
Speaker 1: is a huge part of who you are and your healing.

822
00:43:25,239 --> 00:43:27,160
Speaker 1: One thing I do want to know, especially for men

823
00:43:27,200 --> 00:43:29,719
Speaker 1: and women listening who may be going through something, what

824
00:43:29,840 --> 00:43:33,000
Speaker 1: were your prayers like during that low time? Were they anger?

825
00:43:33,440 --> 00:43:36,480
Speaker 1: Were you pleading? Or was it soft? Quiet? Prayers like

826
00:43:36,520 --> 00:43:38,879
Speaker 1: how did you talk to God during those times? Because

827
00:43:38,880 --> 00:43:40,839
Speaker 1: some people feel like there's only one way to talk

828
00:43:40,880 --> 00:43:41,200
Speaker 1: to him.

829
00:43:41,400 --> 00:43:46,880
Speaker 2: No, I was very honest with God and this is,

830
00:43:47,160 --> 00:43:49,160
Speaker 2: this is, and I'm gonna be as real as I

831
00:43:49,200 --> 00:43:53,439
Speaker 2: can be. I was honest because I really wanted to die,

832
00:43:54,560 --> 00:44:03,000
Speaker 2: and I was upset at him because I was not dead.

833
00:43:59,760 --> 00:44:08,520
Speaker 2: And I the following morning, I'm sitting in my room

834
00:44:09,040 --> 00:44:12,719
Speaker 2: and I'm crying because I did not expect to wake up.

835
00:44:13,920 --> 00:44:19,080
Speaker 2: Am I Why am I still here? And this encounter

836
00:44:19,640 --> 00:44:23,239
Speaker 2: really transformed my life. I never forget it. Sitting on

837
00:44:23,239 --> 00:44:29,080
Speaker 2: the floor and the presence of God walks in my room.

838
00:44:29,160 --> 00:44:33,360
Speaker 2: It's so strong, crystal that I can't look up and

839
00:44:34,440 --> 00:44:38,280
Speaker 2: I'm just crying. I can't stop crying, and I feel

840
00:44:38,320 --> 00:44:41,319
Speaker 2: the presence so powerful, and I'm saying to God. I

841
00:44:41,360 --> 00:44:43,160
Speaker 2: was like, man, why am I still here? I'm like,

842
00:44:43,239 --> 00:44:47,719
Speaker 2: I'm just and I'm like, man, I gotta figure out

843
00:44:48,080 --> 00:44:49,719
Speaker 2: if I'm here, what am I going to do with

844
00:44:49,719 --> 00:44:52,799
Speaker 2: this pain? And all I kept hearing them say is

845
00:44:52,840 --> 00:44:57,600
Speaker 2: give it to me, Give it to me. I literally

846
00:44:57,680 --> 00:44:59,920
Speaker 2: sit on the bed because I can't. I don't know

847
00:45:00,080 --> 00:45:03,520
Speaker 2: what to do. I'm crying I'm falling to my knees

848
00:45:03,920 --> 00:45:05,799
Speaker 2: and I'm just talking to God and I said, I'm

849
00:45:05,920 --> 00:45:07,120
Speaker 2: tired of hurting.

850
00:45:08,680 --> 00:45:10,960
Speaker 3: Just like that, I said, I'm tired of hurting. Man.

851
00:45:11,239 --> 00:45:13,439
Speaker 2: Yeah, And I'm just sitting there crying. I say, I'm

852
00:45:13,480 --> 00:45:16,520
Speaker 2: just tired. I'm tired. And I'm just hearing him saying,

853
00:45:16,560 --> 00:45:19,440
Speaker 2: give it to me, give it to me, And he says,

854
00:45:19,560 --> 00:45:24,279
Speaker 2: I promise you, I'm gonna use it. Yes, And I'm

855
00:45:24,320 --> 00:45:27,319
Speaker 2: sitting there and I said for what?

856
00:45:28,200 --> 00:45:28,920
Speaker 3: Use it for what?

857
00:45:29,840 --> 00:45:32,719
Speaker 2: I don't know what you're gonna And that is the

858
00:45:32,719 --> 00:45:35,960
Speaker 2: most difficult thing. I don't care where you are in

859
00:45:36,000 --> 00:45:38,719
Speaker 2: your relationship with God, is to trust him when he

860
00:45:38,760 --> 00:45:42,160
Speaker 2: says to give you something, because I don't know what

861
00:45:42,160 --> 00:45:44,080
Speaker 2: you're gonna do with the God. And I know that

862
00:45:44,120 --> 00:45:45,520
Speaker 2: you say that you love me, and I know that

863
00:45:45,560 --> 00:45:47,279
Speaker 2: the plans that you have for me are deprivesed for

864
00:45:47,360 --> 00:45:48,799
Speaker 2: me and all these different things.

865
00:45:48,840 --> 00:45:50,280
Speaker 3: I know that you call me blessed.

866
00:45:50,440 --> 00:45:52,920
Speaker 2: I'm to see the Abraham, But I don't know what

867
00:45:52,960 --> 00:45:55,319
Speaker 2: you're gonna do with this pain. I don't know what

868
00:45:55,320 --> 00:45:57,200
Speaker 2: you're gonna do with this marriage. I don't know what

869
00:45:57,239 --> 00:45:59,040
Speaker 2: you're gonna do with this career. I don't know what

870
00:45:59,080 --> 00:46:03,680
Speaker 2: you're gonna do with this, this idea, and so it's hard.

871
00:46:03,760 --> 00:46:06,120
Speaker 2: And so I wish church people would stop acting like

872
00:46:06,280 --> 00:46:07,960
Speaker 2: it's so easy to give something to him.

873
00:46:08,040 --> 00:46:08,319
Speaker 1: It's not.

874
00:46:08,760 --> 00:46:13,799
Speaker 2: Yeah, because giving it to him is a daily is

875
00:46:13,840 --> 00:46:16,919
Speaker 2: a daily walk. I have to release it daily. Yes,

876
00:46:17,239 --> 00:46:22,279
Speaker 2: I have been releasing my pain daily because of the memories.

877
00:46:22,640 --> 00:46:27,640
Speaker 2: Because trauma it doesn't just impact the body. It doesn't

878
00:46:27,680 --> 00:46:31,000
Speaker 2: just impact the way you think you're impacted by it.

879
00:46:31,160 --> 00:46:34,600
Speaker 2: Because of the tapes. It's like a videotape, like a

880
00:46:34,760 --> 00:46:38,200
Speaker 2: tape that's constantly being played. And this is why I

881
00:46:38,239 --> 00:46:42,680
Speaker 2: believe in advanced modalities that therapy may not be the way.

882
00:46:43,080 --> 00:46:46,239
Speaker 2: Maybe it's a form of somatic healing. Maybe it's TMS

883
00:46:46,280 --> 00:46:49,520
Speaker 2: transcranial magnetic stimulation where you got to set the device

884
00:46:49,560 --> 00:46:51,600
Speaker 2: on your head and you got to allow them to

885
00:46:51,640 --> 00:46:55,000
Speaker 2: stimulate your brain because of the impact of the trauma.

886
00:46:55,600 --> 00:46:58,719
Speaker 2: And I had so much pain and my trauma, I

887
00:46:58,840 --> 00:47:00,560
Speaker 2: was just like God, I don't know.

888
00:47:02,040 --> 00:47:06,280
Speaker 3: And I remember being on my knees and I remember.

889
00:47:05,920 --> 00:47:13,200
Speaker 2: Doing this surrendering, surrendering, surrendering, and I'm crying surrendering. So

890
00:47:13,600 --> 00:47:17,000
Speaker 2: after this happened, I get on the phone with my

891
00:47:17,120 --> 00:47:23,080
Speaker 2: mom and I called her and I said, and I'm

892
00:47:23,120 --> 00:47:28,680
Speaker 2: crying still. I said, Mama, I said he came. And

893
00:47:28,760 --> 00:47:32,040
Speaker 2: she said what I said, he came. She said, what

894
00:47:32,080 --> 00:47:32,800
Speaker 2: are you talking about?

895
00:47:33,680 --> 00:47:37,600
Speaker 3: I said, Mama, Jesus came and visited me today. She

896
00:47:37,800 --> 00:47:38,680
Speaker 3: just started crying.

897
00:47:39,640 --> 00:47:40,480
Speaker 2: Oh my God.

898
00:47:40,680 --> 00:47:43,120
Speaker 3: Yeah, she said.

899
00:47:43,120 --> 00:47:46,080
Speaker 2: I was in prayer this morning and I said, God,

900
00:47:46,200 --> 00:47:47,839
Speaker 2: go see about my son, my.

901
00:47:47,800 --> 00:47:51,000
Speaker 1: Lord, and he did the prayers of a mother.

902
00:47:51,600 --> 00:47:56,360
Speaker 2: She said, God, go see about my boy. And I said, Mama,

903
00:47:56,520 --> 00:47:59,399
Speaker 2: I'm gonna try to hold on because he told me to.

904
00:47:59,320 --> 00:48:00,000
Speaker 3: Give this to him.

905
00:48:00,200 --> 00:48:01,839
Speaker 1: Yeah.

906
00:48:01,880 --> 00:48:04,560
Speaker 3: And that was that moment for.

907
00:48:04,600 --> 00:48:07,759
Speaker 2: Me that it wasn't a prayer that was playing. It

908
00:48:07,960 --> 00:48:11,600
Speaker 2: wasn't some words. I didn't have to pontificate, you know

909
00:48:11,640 --> 00:48:15,799
Speaker 2: what I'm saying. I didn't have to be so magniloquent

910
00:48:15,920 --> 00:48:20,920
Speaker 2: and speak so eloquent. God just needed out my raw feelings.

911
00:48:21,760 --> 00:48:25,840
Speaker 2: God doesn't need us to be so polished. He needs

912
00:48:25,960 --> 00:48:29,160
Speaker 2: us to be naked. He need us to be vulnerable.

913
00:48:29,200 --> 00:48:32,040
Speaker 2: I think we you know, we try to. Oh God,

914
00:48:32,080 --> 00:48:35,319
Speaker 2: I just need you to know. God needs you to sometimes, Hey,

915
00:48:36,360 --> 00:48:40,239
Speaker 2: where are you? Where are you man? You told me

916
00:48:40,360 --> 00:48:43,560
Speaker 2: you was gonna help me, where's the help. He don't

917
00:48:43,640 --> 00:48:48,279
Speaker 2: need these cute prayers. Sometimes it's just Jesus.

918
00:48:49,400 --> 00:48:54,520
Speaker 1: That's it, Because Crystal, that's all I had.

919
00:48:55,840 --> 00:49:01,600
Speaker 2: I didn't pray for a couple of years. I didn't

920
00:49:01,640 --> 00:49:05,960
Speaker 2: have any words. And I remember sitting still one morning, God.

921
00:49:05,760 --> 00:49:09,560
Speaker 3: Said, I hear you without even praying.

922
00:49:09,800 --> 00:49:16,480
Speaker 2: Yeah, Because sometimes the human mind is so weighted down

923
00:49:17,280 --> 00:49:21,359
Speaker 2: from the pain, from the burden, from the atrocities of

924
00:49:21,480 --> 00:49:25,279
Speaker 2: just life, that you don't even have anything that's say yes,

925
00:49:25,880 --> 00:49:28,239
Speaker 2: and all you can do is just sit there. And

926
00:49:28,600 --> 00:49:32,000
Speaker 2: I had to learn that sometimes he just wanted us

927
00:49:32,000 --> 00:49:32,520
Speaker 2: to sit there.

928
00:49:33,280 --> 00:49:36,000
Speaker 1: That's it. That's it. Sit there. It's so funny you

929
00:49:36,040 --> 00:49:39,440
Speaker 1: say that. I do a live with on my Patreon

930
00:49:39,520 --> 00:49:44,200
Speaker 1: with my Sweeties, and one girl said, what do I

931
00:49:44,239 --> 00:49:47,000
Speaker 1: do Like when I can hear God's voice and I'm

932
00:49:47,000 --> 00:49:49,600
Speaker 1: trying all these different things and nothing's working. And I

933
00:49:49,640 --> 00:49:52,640
Speaker 1: was like, sometimes you're not hearing it because you're going, going, going.

934
00:49:52,680 --> 00:49:54,960
Speaker 1: You need to sit down so you can hear him down.

935
00:49:55,040 --> 00:49:57,239
Speaker 1: It's like God's trying to stop you from making these

936
00:49:57,239 --> 00:49:59,160
Speaker 1: mistakes and from doing these things, but you won't sit

937
00:49:59,239 --> 00:50:02,600
Speaker 1: down long enough to sit with him. That listen, there's

938
00:50:02,640 --> 00:50:03,799
Speaker 1: power in the stillness.

939
00:50:04,280 --> 00:50:04,480
Speaker 3: You know.

940
00:50:04,640 --> 00:50:08,640
Speaker 2: Mother Teresa says something that God is a friend to silence,

941
00:50:09,239 --> 00:50:15,200
Speaker 2: stillness and solitude, Like we gotta get still, get silent

942
00:50:15,920 --> 00:50:18,440
Speaker 2: and and and and be in that solitude, be in

943
00:50:18,480 --> 00:50:23,640
Speaker 2: that state where you can just rest.

944
00:50:24,239 --> 00:50:29,560
Speaker 3: We have such a busy lifestyle.

945
00:50:30,200 --> 00:50:33,919
Speaker 2: I tell people, I mean people that are not doing

946
00:50:33,960 --> 00:50:39,960
Speaker 2: nothing busy because they're busy doing nothing, you know what

947
00:50:39,960 --> 00:50:44,080
Speaker 2: I'm saying. So even with myself, it's learning to just

948
00:50:44,239 --> 00:50:48,000
Speaker 2: sit with him and not say nothing and just to

949
00:50:48,160 --> 00:50:53,640
Speaker 2: rest and his present and to rest even and what

950
00:50:53,800 --> 00:50:58,160
Speaker 2: I don't understand because God really just looking for obedience,

951
00:50:59,760 --> 00:51:03,360
Speaker 2: and I've had to learn that obedience is best displayed

952
00:51:03,440 --> 00:51:07,560
Speaker 2: when you don't understand what he's doing. And Crystal, I've

953
00:51:07,640 --> 00:51:14,799
Speaker 2: learned to trust him, to trust his methods when I

954
00:51:14,840 --> 00:51:18,640
Speaker 2: don't understand his acts, you know what I mean. Because

955
00:51:18,719 --> 00:51:22,200
Speaker 2: he's a God of order, He's a god of strategy. Yes,

956
00:51:22,480 --> 00:51:25,279
Speaker 2: you know what I'm saying. He's a great architect, and

957
00:51:25,360 --> 00:51:29,080
Speaker 2: so he's moving stuff that we don't even know. As

958
00:51:29,280 --> 00:51:34,200
Speaker 2: my mom said, baby, God protects foods and babies. So

959
00:51:34,360 --> 00:51:37,200
Speaker 2: there's times where he's working and we don't know he's working.

960
00:51:37,600 --> 00:51:39,399
Speaker 2: And I've had to learn and say, you know what,

961
00:51:39,760 --> 00:51:41,160
Speaker 2: I don't know what you're doing. Man.

962
00:51:41,360 --> 00:51:44,160
Speaker 1: Yeah, but do you think because he always gonna do

963
00:51:44,200 --> 00:51:47,160
Speaker 1: his big one, he's always gonna do his biggest one.

964
00:51:47,360 --> 00:51:49,839
Speaker 1: We'd be like, wait, this is I wouldn't even thought

965
00:51:49,840 --> 00:51:51,840
Speaker 1: of this. He's like, I know because I'm God. And

966
00:51:51,880 --> 00:51:53,719
Speaker 1: you're not listen.

967
00:51:53,640 --> 00:51:56,240
Speaker 2: When people say, man, did you ever that my grandma

968
00:51:56,320 --> 00:51:57,239
Speaker 2: used to call me doctor J.

969
00:51:57,840 --> 00:52:00,000
Speaker 1: Your girl. So that's before you became a doctor.

970
00:52:00,680 --> 00:52:04,560
Speaker 2: She's to call me doctor J wow, or so she'sa

971
00:52:04,560 --> 00:52:07,440
Speaker 2: call me doctor J. And you couldn't have told me

972
00:52:07,480 --> 00:52:10,120
Speaker 2: because I know the game of football. I loved it.

973
00:52:10,760 --> 00:52:13,200
Speaker 2: But man, you could have never told me that I

974
00:52:13,239 --> 00:52:16,440
Speaker 2: would be a therapist, would be in this position and

975
00:52:16,520 --> 00:52:21,080
Speaker 2: be this voice, to be you know, a reflection of

976
00:52:21,160 --> 00:52:24,880
Speaker 2: what healing looks like in real time, to be this

977
00:52:24,960 --> 00:52:27,640
Speaker 2: black man who has been in a white house, who

978
00:52:27,719 --> 00:52:29,920
Speaker 2: has been all over the country speaking and had a

979
00:52:30,000 --> 00:52:30,760
Speaker 2: tour of books.

980
00:52:31,040 --> 00:52:31,960
Speaker 3: And you told me that.

981
00:52:32,000 --> 00:52:32,200
Speaker 1: Man.

982
00:52:32,320 --> 00:52:35,760
Speaker 2: Ten years ago, I've been like, man, I've been like Negro,

983
00:52:35,960 --> 00:52:38,759
Speaker 2: please please like what therapist?

984
00:52:40,040 --> 00:52:46,600
Speaker 3: Like mental health? Man? And I remember this, this prophet

985
00:52:46,640 --> 00:52:48,440
Speaker 3: telling me, he said God.

986
00:52:48,320 --> 00:52:51,719
Speaker 2: Is going to use you, and I'm like, whatever, man

987
00:52:52,200 --> 00:52:53,000
Speaker 2: like literally Christ.

988
00:52:53,160 --> 00:52:55,080
Speaker 3: He was like, God is going to use you to

989
00:52:55,120 --> 00:52:56,080
Speaker 3: transform the world.

990
00:52:57,640 --> 00:53:00,920
Speaker 2: And I remember laughing at this man ever did at

991
00:53:00,920 --> 00:53:02,080
Speaker 2: the angel when they tol.

992
00:53:02,200 --> 00:53:07,400
Speaker 1: You're gonna have a baby you okay, listen.

993
00:53:07,800 --> 00:53:11,239
Speaker 2: That man called me ten years later said what I

994
00:53:11,320 --> 00:53:13,279
Speaker 2: tell you. I was sitting on the couch. This is

995
00:53:13,320 --> 00:53:16,520
Speaker 2: when Taragi had her show Peace of Mind. He prophesied.

996
00:53:16,560 --> 00:53:18,400
Speaker 2: He said, I see you sitting on the couch with

997
00:53:18,480 --> 00:53:21,520
Speaker 2: the celebrity and you're talking about healing and da da

998
00:53:21,560 --> 00:53:22,040
Speaker 2: da da.

999
00:53:22,600 --> 00:53:24,720
Speaker 3: He called me ten years later when.

1000
00:53:24,560 --> 00:53:32,280
Speaker 2: The episode aired, Hey, man of God, of God, and

1001
00:53:32,320 --> 00:53:35,920
Speaker 2: he said, I told you what I saw.

1002
00:53:35,040 --> 00:53:36,719
Speaker 3: That God was going to use you the mighty way.

1003
00:53:36,760 --> 00:53:37,600
Speaker 3: I just broke down.

1004
00:53:38,480 --> 00:53:42,120
Speaker 2: So when you say he gonna do his big one,

1005
00:53:42,160 --> 00:53:44,000
Speaker 2: and here's the other part, I gotta say this.

1006
00:53:45,040 --> 00:53:48,800
Speaker 3: People like, uh, we didn't even see this for ourselves.

1007
00:53:49,080 --> 00:53:51,480
Speaker 1: No, not to this magnitude. I didn't even want to

1008
00:53:51,480 --> 00:53:52,279
Speaker 1: do a podcast.

1009
00:53:52,640 --> 00:53:54,480
Speaker 3: But let's forget the podcast.

1010
00:53:54,719 --> 00:53:57,880
Speaker 1: Like, but even I wanted to be an actor, like

1011
00:53:57,920 --> 00:53:59,880
Speaker 1: that was a childhood yam. I wanted to be a singer.

1012
00:54:00,800 --> 00:54:04,359
Speaker 1: But the impact that we had to this magnitude. Never

1013
00:54:04,480 --> 00:54:06,840
Speaker 1: thought it like I just wanted to be an artist

1014
00:54:07,360 --> 00:54:09,800
Speaker 1: and then keep all this my personal self to myself,

1015
00:54:09,840 --> 00:54:12,000
Speaker 1: Like I wasn't trying to share my whole life with

1016
00:54:12,040 --> 00:54:13,759
Speaker 1: the world, but here we are. You know.

1017
00:54:14,360 --> 00:54:17,200
Speaker 3: Do you ever wake up any mornings it just be like.

1018
00:54:18,640 --> 00:54:22,520
Speaker 1: Wow, Like every day every morning. I wake up every day.

1019
00:54:22,520 --> 00:54:26,960
Speaker 1: I pull into my garage every day. Even just like

1020
00:54:27,080 --> 00:54:28,600
Speaker 1: I was talking to guy the other day, I was like,

1021
00:54:28,760 --> 00:54:32,600
Speaker 1: because just seeing cars, Oh, those cars that drive themselves

1022
00:54:33,800 --> 00:54:34,200
Speaker 1: pull it.

1023
00:54:34,120 --> 00:54:34,839
Speaker 3: Out in front of me.

1024
00:54:35,000 --> 00:54:37,399
Speaker 1: Wait move, I was like, what is happening right now?

1025
00:54:37,680 --> 00:54:39,120
Speaker 1: And then I just thought. I was like, God, thank

1026
00:54:39,160 --> 00:54:41,520
Speaker 1: you for the wrecks that I can't see. You know,

1027
00:54:41,560 --> 00:54:43,960
Speaker 1: It's like moments I'm always like, wow, this is crazy,

1028
00:54:44,200 --> 00:54:46,120
Speaker 1: just even my life, like I was on Live last night,

1029
00:54:46,160 --> 00:54:48,840
Speaker 1: and or even last week. We were this week we

1030
00:54:48,840 --> 00:54:50,239
Speaker 1: were filming and two people came up to me and

1031
00:54:50,280 --> 00:54:52,919
Speaker 1: asked me to pray for them. I'm like, my friend

1032
00:54:52,960 --> 00:54:55,560
Speaker 1: Brenda Palmer, she's you know, Brenda, she's always like she

1033
00:54:55,600 --> 00:54:57,759
Speaker 1: caused me pastor. And then my other friend called me

1034
00:54:57,800 --> 00:54:58,239
Speaker 1: first lady.

1035
00:54:58,280 --> 00:55:02,960
Speaker 2: I'm like like you like, no, don't, don't y'all put

1036
00:55:02,960 --> 00:55:03,640
Speaker 2: that on my friend.

1037
00:55:04,480 --> 00:55:07,680
Speaker 1: She's gonna say, all right, PC, you have like stopping Brenda.

1038
00:55:07,800 --> 00:55:10,720
Speaker 1: She hates when people call it but you're a pastor.

1039
00:55:10,600 --> 00:55:12,640
Speaker 3: Like, because some people that's what they call to do.

1040
00:55:12,960 --> 00:55:17,880
Speaker 2: Yes, God has blessed us because we're not tied to

1041
00:55:18,080 --> 00:55:18,920
Speaker 2: the four walls.

1042
00:55:19,280 --> 00:55:19,919
Speaker 1: No, we are.

1043
00:55:20,840 --> 00:55:25,400
Speaker 2: We minister through entertainment, acting, through podcast, through speaking, and

1044
00:55:25,440 --> 00:55:29,120
Speaker 2: through curating, curating spaces. Like I told God, I'll do

1045
00:55:29,160 --> 00:55:30,520
Speaker 2: whatever you want to do, but do not put me

1046
00:55:30,520 --> 00:55:31,000
Speaker 2: in no church.

1047
00:55:32,320 --> 00:55:34,600
Speaker 1: And honestly, I feel like God is doing a restrection

1048
00:55:34,680 --> 00:55:37,319
Speaker 1: of the church anyway, because it's not that we are

1049
00:55:37,360 --> 00:55:39,719
Speaker 1: the church. That's not what He meant for it to be.

1050
00:55:39,840 --> 00:55:41,280
Speaker 3: But Crystal, this is ministry.

1051
00:55:41,840 --> 00:55:42,200
Speaker 1: It is.

1052
00:55:42,280 --> 00:55:44,719
Speaker 2: What you're doing is ministry. Ministry is meeting people where

1053
00:55:44,719 --> 00:55:45,040
Speaker 2: they are.

1054
00:55:45,160 --> 00:55:46,040
Speaker 3: This is ministry.

1055
00:55:46,280 --> 00:55:49,920
Speaker 2: You're meeting people because not only because if you tell

1056
00:55:50,040 --> 00:55:52,440
Speaker 2: me to keep it positive, that means I have to

1057
00:55:52,600 --> 00:55:53,400
Speaker 2: think positive.

1058
00:55:53,560 --> 00:55:55,680
Speaker 1: Yes, yes, you got to change your mind.

1059
00:55:55,719 --> 00:55:56,560
Speaker 3: I have to change.

1060
00:55:58,120 --> 00:56:00,200
Speaker 2: But but when you think about the word repent is

1061
00:56:00,239 --> 00:56:03,440
Speaker 2: even in the Greek meta Noah, come on now, the

1062
00:56:03,560 --> 00:56:05,040
Speaker 2: word so stop.

1063
00:56:05,440 --> 00:56:06,040
Speaker 3: Let me Yeah.

1064
00:56:06,120 --> 00:56:09,359
Speaker 2: So when you when you think about repent is in

1065
00:56:09,360 --> 00:56:13,160
Speaker 2: the Greek meta, Noah, it is a change to change

1066
00:56:13,160 --> 00:56:13,799
Speaker 2: the way you think.

1067
00:56:15,000 --> 00:56:15,880
Speaker 3: That's what it means.

1068
00:56:16,400 --> 00:56:19,719
Speaker 2: So it's not, you know, and even when you think

1069
00:56:19,760 --> 00:56:22,879
Speaker 2: about sin, like because even we I mean, it's just

1070
00:56:22,920 --> 00:56:25,640
Speaker 2: like you know, I just love God has given me

1071
00:56:25,680 --> 00:56:28,040
Speaker 2: such as beautiful mind. You know what I mean to

1072
00:56:28,080 --> 00:56:32,320
Speaker 2: deconstruct people's mind because even when we look at sin,

1073
00:56:33,239 --> 00:56:34,560
Speaker 2: it means to miss the mark.

1074
00:56:36,400 --> 00:56:38,000
Speaker 1: Yep, that's what it means.

1075
00:56:39,239 --> 00:56:42,120
Speaker 2: And if you can change the way you think, you

1076
00:56:42,239 --> 00:56:45,680
Speaker 2: minimize missing the mark. So if we're going to get

1077
00:56:45,719 --> 00:56:49,200
Speaker 2: people to turn away from sin and to get them

1078
00:56:49,200 --> 00:56:52,040
Speaker 2: to quote unquote repent, we have to help people change

1079
00:56:52,040 --> 00:56:55,080
Speaker 2: the way they think. It starts in these spaces. It

1080
00:56:55,160 --> 00:56:58,839
Speaker 2: starts because this is mental health. What you're doing is

1081
00:56:59,200 --> 00:57:03,160
Speaker 2: mental health. You getting on them lives. Yeah, that's mental help.

1082
00:57:03,320 --> 00:57:06,960
Speaker 1: Yes, no, literally, people leave change. Like we've seen the

1083
00:57:07,000 --> 00:57:09,880
Speaker 1: testimonies of people like just from coming into this community,

1084
00:57:09,960 --> 00:57:14,080
Speaker 1: the lives we saved me opening also about suicide, and

1085
00:57:14,760 --> 00:57:18,320
Speaker 1: opening up about relationships with my family and helping mothers

1086
00:57:18,320 --> 00:57:22,400
Speaker 1: and daughters heal their relationships. It's been so many positive

1087
00:57:22,440 --> 00:57:25,080
Speaker 1: outcomes that have come from just speaking our truth.

1088
00:57:25,360 --> 00:57:26,760
Speaker 3: And that's why God keep blessing you.

1089
00:57:26,880 --> 00:57:27,200
Speaker 1: Yeah.

1090
00:57:27,240 --> 00:57:29,840
Speaker 2: Wow, that's why God keep giving you more because He

1091
00:57:29,840 --> 00:57:30,680
Speaker 2: can trust you with it.

1092
00:57:31,120 --> 00:57:32,560
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's my prayer too.

1093
00:57:32,840 --> 00:57:35,120
Speaker 2: He can trust you with it and you don't have

1094
00:57:35,160 --> 00:57:35,640
Speaker 2: to keep praying.

1095
00:57:35,720 --> 00:57:37,840
Speaker 3: He can trust you with it because he didn't because

1096
00:57:38,600 --> 00:57:39,000
Speaker 3: as I'm.

1097
00:57:38,920 --> 00:57:41,760
Speaker 2: Speaking, I'm speaking to me because it'd be scared me

1098
00:57:41,800 --> 00:57:44,200
Speaker 2: because I'm like, you give me a lot, God, to

1099
00:57:44,240 --> 00:57:45,120
Speaker 2: who much is given.

1100
00:57:45,320 --> 00:57:46,120
Speaker 3: Yes, it's the.

1101
00:57:46,120 --> 00:57:48,400
Speaker 1: Requirement, the big requirements, and the.

1102
00:57:48,280 --> 00:57:50,400
Speaker 3: Requirement is really the responsibility.

1103
00:57:50,480 --> 00:57:54,400
Speaker 2: Yes, yeah, because I don't want to mishandle the gift.

1104
00:57:54,920 --> 00:57:57,600
Speaker 2: I don't want to mishandle the call, and I don't

1105
00:57:57,640 --> 00:58:03,120
Speaker 2: want to mishandle people. Yeah, that's that's my burden. It's

1106
00:58:03,200 --> 00:58:07,160
Speaker 2: like God, listen, Like even with my prophetic gift, like

1107
00:58:07,600 --> 00:58:10,440
Speaker 2: I'm in spacing that people pull on.

1108
00:58:10,480 --> 00:58:14,760
Speaker 3: It and and.

1109
00:58:12,960 --> 00:58:16,560
Speaker 2: And people will ask like you because you can always

1110
00:58:17,480 --> 00:58:21,320
Speaker 2: because it takes a prophet to identify enough profit like truly,

1111
00:58:22,000 --> 00:58:25,520
Speaker 2: because it's a difference to walk in the to have

1112
00:58:25,600 --> 00:58:28,120
Speaker 2: a prophetic gift, but also to walk in the office

1113
00:58:28,320 --> 00:58:32,520
Speaker 2: of that. But there are spaces that I'm in that

1114
00:58:32,520 --> 00:58:35,960
Speaker 2: that pulls on that, and I give the word and

1115
00:58:36,040 --> 00:58:39,439
Speaker 2: I leave because I never like I'm not you know,

1116
00:58:39,640 --> 00:58:44,040
Speaker 2: I'm just a man and my focus daily is how

1117
00:58:44,080 --> 00:58:47,880
Speaker 2: can I be a better instrument to fit into God's

1118
00:58:47,880 --> 00:58:49,800
Speaker 2: hands so he can use me.

1119
00:58:49,880 --> 00:58:53,439
Speaker 3: That's it, you know, And that's what we're doing.

1120
00:58:53,480 --> 00:58:57,440
Speaker 2: And that's why God keeps expanding us, because we have

1121
00:58:57,520 --> 00:59:00,680
Speaker 2: a heart for his people. And she said to me,

1122
00:59:00,760 --> 00:59:02,400
Speaker 2: he said, here's what people don't realize.

1123
00:59:02,440 --> 00:59:03,240
Speaker 3: You didn't ask for that.

1124
00:59:04,560 --> 00:59:06,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, and that's why He gave it to you.

1125
00:59:07,120 --> 00:59:10,800
Speaker 2: Folks, be mad at what we what we have been given.

1126
00:59:10,840 --> 00:59:12,640
Speaker 3: We didn't ask for this. You just wanted to be

1127
00:59:12,720 --> 00:59:16,040
Speaker 3: an artist. I just wanted to be a football player.

1128
00:59:16,520 --> 00:59:21,640
Speaker 2: And my my dream was playball, you know, make a

1129
00:59:21,640 --> 00:59:25,080
Speaker 2: little money to buy a house, have a family. Like

1130
00:59:25,360 --> 00:59:28,120
Speaker 2: I never wanted to be all over the country. I

1131
00:59:28,240 --> 00:59:29,040
Speaker 2: like being at home.

1132
00:59:31,440 --> 00:59:32,880
Speaker 1: It was like I have other plans for you.

1133
00:59:33,840 --> 00:59:36,000
Speaker 2: Listen, every time I got to leave my house, I

1134
00:59:36,160 --> 00:59:39,720
Speaker 2: just be like, Lord, only for you, Man, only for you.

1135
00:59:40,000 --> 00:59:42,520
Speaker 1: I love home. I'm like I can just say there.

1136
00:59:42,600 --> 00:59:43,960
Speaker 3: Man, I'm such a homebody.

1137
00:59:45,000 --> 00:59:47,080
Speaker 2: I get on that couch and turn that TV on

1138
00:59:47,760 --> 00:59:49,760
Speaker 2: after I do my workout and my mal prep.

1139
00:59:51,520 --> 00:59:55,280
Speaker 3: It's cook, I'm not coming at this house.

1140
00:59:56,720 --> 00:59:58,840
Speaker 1: You're like me, I have to recharge, Like home is

1141
00:59:58,840 --> 01:00:02,200
Speaker 1: like my recharging station, and like for real, like that's right.

1142
01:00:03,480 --> 01:00:05,840
Speaker 3: How big is your social battery.

1143
01:00:06,040 --> 01:00:10,360
Speaker 1: Oh very it's very small, very limited. Yeah, yeah, like

1144
01:00:10,400 --> 01:00:13,320
Speaker 1: my team knows. I'll give him that look like Big West.

1145
01:00:13,520 --> 01:00:14,800
Speaker 1: I can just look at him and he be like,

1146
01:00:15,240 --> 01:00:17,760
Speaker 1: all right, come on, like because it's it's a lot.

1147
01:00:17,800 --> 01:00:21,080
Speaker 1: It's a lot, and they pull they pulled, Yeah.

1148
01:00:21,000 --> 01:00:22,880
Speaker 3: Because you got that all on you. You got their

1149
01:00:22,920 --> 01:00:31,280
Speaker 3: glow and everybody want the bruise, not who's the master

1150
01:00:32,840 --> 01:00:33,520
Speaker 3: show enough.

1151
01:00:35,080 --> 01:00:36,160
Speaker 1: That is so true.

1152
01:00:36,200 --> 01:00:38,240
Speaker 3: We're telling our age right now for real.

1153
01:00:39,000 --> 01:00:43,800
Speaker 2: Twenty five five, twenty five Christmas, Chris is twenty five,

1154
01:00:44,680 --> 01:00:49,200
Speaker 2: I'm thirty two forever.

1155
01:00:49,240 --> 01:00:50,960
Speaker 3: So you got that, you got that glow on you.

1156
01:00:51,040 --> 01:00:55,680
Speaker 1: Man, the warning it is it's joy though honestly, it's

1157
01:00:55,720 --> 01:00:57,600
Speaker 1: like it's not given by the world. I can definitely

1158
01:00:57,640 --> 01:00:58,080
Speaker 1: say that this.

1159
01:00:58,320 --> 01:01:00,360
Speaker 3: Here's the other part, man. They be a t to you.

1160
01:01:00,400 --> 01:01:01,080
Speaker 3: They don't even know why.

1161
01:01:01,080 --> 01:01:03,000
Speaker 1: They don't know why. People say that all the time.

1162
01:01:03,040 --> 01:01:04,760
Speaker 1: They said, I see you on TV. It's like it's

1163
01:01:04,840 --> 01:01:07,040
Speaker 1: just something about her, and I always say, it's the Lord.

1164
01:01:07,120 --> 01:01:08,280
Speaker 1: I ain't got none to do with it.

1165
01:01:10,080 --> 01:01:12,040
Speaker 2: I remember my mentor telling me, he said me, tell

1166
01:01:12,040 --> 01:01:16,880
Speaker 2: you something, man, he gonna know I'm telling this. He said, listen,

1167
01:01:18,520 --> 01:01:21,880
Speaker 2: what you got on you? Is you gotta steward it well?

1168
01:01:22,800 --> 01:01:27,000
Speaker 2: He said, you got this football bill, chocolate, you speak well.

1169
01:01:27,680 --> 01:01:29,840
Speaker 2: He said, everything gonna be attracted to you.

1170
01:01:29,920 --> 01:01:36,120
Speaker 1: And he looked at me, everything, Williams, everything everything, everything.

1171
01:01:38,280 --> 01:01:40,560
Speaker 1: That's true, man, because some of the stuff, I'll be

1172
01:01:40,560 --> 01:01:41,360
Speaker 1: looking at me, like.

1173
01:01:42,120 --> 01:01:46,400
Speaker 2: I said, but he said, look at me. And when

1174
01:01:46,440 --> 01:01:53,920
Speaker 2: he said that, man, I'll be daggon man, because the

1175
01:01:54,000 --> 01:02:00,800
Speaker 2: anointing draws. Yeah, it's a drawer and it draws everyone right, rong,

1176
01:02:02,960 --> 01:02:03,760
Speaker 2: red blue.

1177
01:02:04,440 --> 01:02:05,640
Speaker 4: It's like I don't know what it is, but I

1178
01:02:05,680 --> 01:02:10,960
Speaker 4: want it and as we got to review it in

1179
01:02:11,000 --> 01:02:15,560
Speaker 4: the name of Jesus, because no, but that is so

1180
01:02:15,760 --> 01:02:18,400
Speaker 4: true and a lot of we don't even be knowing,

1181
01:02:18,480 --> 01:02:20,880
Speaker 4: like what all comes with I'm sure you didn't know

1182
01:02:20,960 --> 01:02:22,960
Speaker 4: everything that came with this life and living it.

1183
01:02:23,000 --> 01:02:27,400
Speaker 1: And like you talked about when when you take these platforms,

1184
01:02:27,480 --> 01:02:31,000
Speaker 1: it's not just you anymore. It's so you open up

1185
01:02:31,040 --> 01:02:35,080
Speaker 1: for the audit, as Stevie Bag said, and that is

1186
01:02:35,120 --> 01:02:37,280
Speaker 1: so true. We open ourselves up to a lot and

1187
01:02:37,320 --> 01:02:39,840
Speaker 1: we don't realize how much comes along with this man.

1188
01:02:40,000 --> 01:02:43,840
Speaker 2: I and it's my mother, Mama, I want you to

1189
01:02:43,920 --> 01:02:47,600
Speaker 2: know publicly, baby, how much I appreciate you. My mother

1190
01:02:47,680 --> 01:02:49,760
Speaker 2: wakes up every morning at three thirty in the Inner

1191
01:02:49,800 --> 01:02:53,160
Speaker 2: Seed for me, that means so much to me. Crystal,

1192
01:02:53,760 --> 01:02:57,080
Speaker 2: every morning she wakes up at three thirty at Inner Seed,

1193
01:02:58,000 --> 01:02:58,640
Speaker 2: and that's something more.

1194
01:02:58,760 --> 01:03:01,800
Speaker 3: I'll call at five o'clock. You'd be like, boy, you know, I'm.

1195
01:03:01,680 --> 01:03:04,440
Speaker 2: Just coming out of the room for you. You traveling

1196
01:03:04,480 --> 01:03:08,600
Speaker 2: this country healing these men. You got a mighty you

1197
01:03:08,680 --> 01:03:12,160
Speaker 2: got a mighty mandated mission on you. Boy, boy, you

1198
01:03:12,200 --> 01:03:15,200
Speaker 2: got a big assignment, but you're gonna complete it. And

1199
01:03:15,320 --> 01:03:18,400
Speaker 2: she told me recently, she said, King, I pray for

1200
01:03:18,480 --> 01:03:22,120
Speaker 2: you often because she said you have such a good heart.

1201
01:03:23,200 --> 01:03:25,120
Speaker 2: And when you have a good heart, and I'm sure

1202
01:03:25,120 --> 01:03:29,120
Speaker 2: you know this, is that you want to see everybody

1203
01:03:29,160 --> 01:03:32,960
Speaker 2: get there. Yeah, And I think the toughest thing for

1204
01:03:33,040 --> 01:03:39,120
Speaker 2: me was that the circles would change because everybody can't go.

1205
01:03:39,960 --> 01:03:42,880
Speaker 1: Please come back next week as we continue this incredibly

1206
01:03:43,000 --> 01:03:46,240
Speaker 1: insightful conversation with doctor King. J. Barnett