WEBVTT - The Witches (1990) 0:00:00.960 --> 0:00:04.000 On the Doll Cast, the questions asked if movies have 0:00:04.080 --> 0:00:07.960 women in them, are all their discussions just boyfriends and husbands, 0:00:08.000 --> 0:00:13.080 or do they have individualism? The patriarchy zef invest start 0:00:13.200 --> 0:00:19.520 changing it with the bec Del Cast. Hello Jamie, Hello Caitlynn, 0:00:19.960 --> 0:00:24.920 it's me. Um. You know not. I'm not a witch. 0:00:25.000 --> 0:00:28.800 But do you want some chocolate? Do I want something? No, 0:00:29.280 --> 0:00:31.960 I'm just in my treehouse here. Don't worry. I didn't 0:00:32.000 --> 0:00:35.680 poison it with any formula that's going to turn you 0:00:35.720 --> 0:00:39.400 into a mouse. Okay, do you have a snake? Do 0:00:39.440 --> 0:00:41.600 you have a snake? Um? Yeah, I have a snake. 0:00:41.680 --> 0:00:48.760 But that's just because I know you love playing with snakes. Okay, pointed, Um, 0:00:48.800 --> 0:00:51.800 and none of your business what I do in my 0:00:51.880 --> 0:00:56.280 spare time. Well, I guess I'll I'll think about it, 0:00:56.360 --> 0:00:59.360 but only if you promised to only appear in one 0:00:59.440 --> 0:01:05.520 scene and never come back. Sure, Okay, yeah, yeah, Welcome 0:01:05.560 --> 0:01:11.520 to the Bechtel Cast. Another perfect introduction, flawless, no notes. 0:01:12.520 --> 0:01:15.399 My name is Jamie Loft, as my name is Caitlin Dronte, 0:01:15.600 --> 0:01:19.520 and this is our show in which we examine movies 0:01:19.560 --> 0:01:23.639 through an intersectional feminist lens using the beck Told test 0:01:23.920 --> 0:01:27.319 as a jumping off point to initiate a larger discussion 0:01:27.760 --> 0:01:32.760 representation in cinema. Do you have one of those Twitter 0:01:33.319 --> 0:01:37.320 like scary Halloween names? Do you have you ever done that? 0:01:37.560 --> 0:01:39.759 I've never done that. I have done it in the past. 0:01:40.000 --> 0:01:43.160 I forgot to do it this year, Slash couldn't think 0:01:43.200 --> 0:01:46.440 of anything clever. And have you have you done? I 0:01:46.440 --> 0:01:51.480 know you've done Caitlin Bante, right, Bante? Yeah, which doesn't 0:01:51.480 --> 0:01:55.160 even really make sense. I had one well, one year 0:01:55.200 --> 0:01:58.120 I did nine tip Dracula because that is an anagram 0:01:58.160 --> 0:02:01.920 of my name. Who could forget nine tip Jack? And 0:02:01.960 --> 0:02:04.480 then there was another one I did that I was like, 0:02:04.640 --> 0:02:08.960 I'll never top this. This is genius and I'm so smart, 0:02:09.080 --> 0:02:12.679 but I couldn't. I can't remember what it was. So 0:02:13.040 --> 0:02:15.600 this is not a good story. I've never I've never 0:02:15.720 --> 0:02:18.560 had one. I don't I've never been able. But also 0:02:18.680 --> 0:02:22.520 I'm notoriously like not good with puns. I just don't 0:02:22.560 --> 0:02:24.320 have a good brain for it. And so I'm like, 0:02:24.560 --> 0:02:26.560 maybe there's one that's just been sitting in front of 0:02:26.600 --> 0:02:29.720 me my whole fucking life, But I've never Boo doesn't 0:02:29.760 --> 0:02:34.080 fit any any damn place in my name. Ghost doesn't 0:02:34.080 --> 0:02:42.000 fit what rhymes with Jamie scared, scare me loftus scar 0:02:42.880 --> 0:02:51.560 that sucks. That sucks. I hate it about it. Wait, okay, 0:02:51.800 --> 0:02:54.520 I actually, um, I think I can come around to this. 0:02:54.960 --> 0:02:58.320 Um Okay, can I tell you what the Becteal test is? 0:02:59.200 --> 0:03:03.480 Please at all pass the Bechtel test, by the way, 0:03:03.520 --> 0:03:06.000 which is just proof that it doesn't. Although you could 0:03:06.080 --> 0:03:08.840 argue that that was not a conversation that moved the 0:03:08.840 --> 0:03:12.960 episode forward in a meaningful way. So I disagree. I 0:03:13.000 --> 0:03:17.600 completely disagree. So so. The Bechdel test um is a 0:03:17.639 --> 0:03:22.320 media metric created by queer cartoonist Alison Bechdel, often called 0:03:22.520 --> 0:03:27.040 the Bechdel Wallace test um. It was originally made as 0:03:27.080 --> 0:03:31.720 a kind of one off joke metric in Alican Becktel's 0:03:31.760 --> 0:03:36.160 comic Dikes to Watch Out For which here's your occasional 0:03:36.200 --> 0:03:39.040 reminder that you should read that comic. I have the 0:03:39.120 --> 0:03:43.360 full collection and it fucking rocks. And there's a lot 0:03:43.360 --> 0:03:46.200 of different versions of this metric. The one we use 0:03:46.520 --> 0:03:51.520 requires that two people of a marginalized gender with names 0:03:51.520 --> 0:03:57.440 such as Caitlin Bronte and Scare Me Loft have a 0:03:57.480 --> 0:04:00.560 conversation about something other than a man for more than 0:04:00.600 --> 0:04:02.680 two lines of dialogue, and it does need to move 0:04:02.760 --> 0:04:06.480 the podcast the Bechtel Cast forward in order to count 0:04:07.680 --> 0:04:13.920 this this movie. Today we're covering the Witches n Um, 0:04:13.960 --> 0:04:17.240 not to be confused with The Witches twenty, which no 0:04:17.279 --> 0:04:20.320 longer exists, has been wiped from the record, and I 0:04:20.400 --> 0:04:23.159 have like just a little it doesn't have to do 0:04:23.200 --> 0:04:25.560 with intersectional feminism, but it does have to do with 0:04:25.720 --> 0:04:29.080 predatory capitalism, so sort of it does. So we'll get 0:04:29.120 --> 0:04:34.720 there later. But nine nine Angelic Houston The Witches is 0:04:34.960 --> 0:04:37.440 the topic of today's discussion, and I thought it would 0:04:37.440 --> 0:04:39.960 pass the Bucktel test a little more handily than it does, 0:04:40.000 --> 0:04:46.799 I'll be quite honest. But discussion for later, Jamie, what 0:04:47.160 --> 0:04:55.480 is your relationship to this film slash intellectual property? Nothing? 0:04:55.720 --> 0:04:59.039 Nothing at all. I don't I I couldn't tell you 0:04:59.160 --> 0:05:02.800 why I didn't watch this movie growing up. But I 0:05:02.839 --> 0:05:05.159 have no nostalgic attachment to it. I think the most 0:05:05.160 --> 0:05:07.680 nostalgic attachment I have to this movie is just the 0:05:07.760 --> 0:05:12.359 idea of Angelica Houston. And that's a powerful thing. Yes, 0:05:12.520 --> 0:05:15.960 And I always like she is so campy, and like, 0:05:16.080 --> 0:05:19.320 I think she's really fun in this movie. I think 0:05:19.320 --> 0:05:23.120 it is like I didn't know Jim Henson was involved 0:05:23.120 --> 0:05:26.359 in like I truly knew basically nothing. I just knew 0:05:26.360 --> 0:05:29.760 it was a World Doll book that I never read, 0:05:30.680 --> 0:05:35.440 and this is a movie that I've never seen, and so, uh, 0:05:35.480 --> 0:05:37.840 this has been a request we've been getting for some time, 0:05:37.839 --> 0:05:39.680 and I think we there was an uptick in it 0:05:39.720 --> 0:05:43.919 when the reboot was released, which I've only seen clips of, 0:05:44.040 --> 0:05:48.640 but is by all accounts so like also whatever not 0:05:48.720 --> 0:05:51.919 good and no one has any nostalgic attachment to it either, 0:05:53.040 --> 0:05:56.000 so whatever, So Mecas is in his flop era, baby, 0:05:56.200 --> 0:05:59.599 he did, gosh, she's been in his flop era because 0:05:59.680 --> 0:06:02.760 what what is it? We he welcomed us to Marwin 0:06:02.920 --> 0:06:06.760 and we were like, I'm I'm weaving and then what 0:06:06.839 --> 0:06:09.400 did he do it? He said what about Anne Hathaway 0:06:09.400 --> 0:06:12.440 and the Witches? And You're like that sounds so Phoebe 0:06:12.440 --> 0:06:15.200 Waller Bridges right there, like what do you? What are 0:06:15.200 --> 0:06:18.360 you doing? And then most recently he was like, how 0:06:18.400 --> 0:06:23.600 about Pinocchio? We were okay, no thanks, but and then 0:06:23.600 --> 0:06:27.479 we were like but also but also soft plug for 0:06:28.240 --> 0:06:33.160 the Matreon when we will be covering the Pinocchio Wars, 0:06:33.440 --> 0:06:37.480 which Robert Zemeckis in his flop, Era has already managed, 0:06:37.640 --> 0:06:40.039 I think, to lose in advance. The battle has not 0:06:40.120 --> 0:06:44.240 even started and he's already lost. Because I everyone hated 0:06:44.279 --> 0:06:48.120 that damn movie and it looks so scary. This movie 0:06:48.160 --> 0:06:50.120 also looks so scary, but in a very different way. 0:06:50.480 --> 0:06:53.720 I will say, right at the top, apologies to people 0:06:53.720 --> 0:06:56.640 with a nostalgic attachment to the spoofy. I did not 0:06:56.800 --> 0:07:00.800 like this movie. Uh and I I think it shows 0:07:00.839 --> 0:07:04.400 all of and this is like been criticism since the 0:07:04.440 --> 0:07:06.640 book came out. The book was released in eighty three. 0:07:06.920 --> 0:07:09.320 We famously don't read books, but I did research the 0:07:09.360 --> 0:07:13.320 differences and adaptation changes, and then this came out in 0:07:14.520 --> 0:07:16.720 and rold All, who we'll get back to. We've just 0:07:16.840 --> 0:07:19.760 we've covered we covered this last year on our Matilda episode, 0:07:19.760 --> 0:07:24.320 but it is even more relevant in this adaptation than 0:07:24.360 --> 0:07:26.880 it was in Matilda. I think of just this is 0:07:26.960 --> 0:07:30.960 just like late Era Roll Doll, like all of his 0:07:31.440 --> 0:07:37.440 famous prejudices against women and Jewish people in particular, and 0:07:37.520 --> 0:07:41.800 Jewish women in particular are just all like cannon to 0:07:41.920 --> 0:07:46.600 the story. And I h Angelica Houston is great, but 0:07:46.760 --> 0:07:51.360 I just really had a hard time with this one, Caitlin, 0:07:51.440 --> 0:07:55.560 what's your history with the Witches? Nine? I had not 0:07:55.760 --> 0:07:59.000 seen this movie either, something that it seems like I 0:07:59.040 --> 0:08:02.840 would have seen as a kid growing up. But I 0:08:02.840 --> 0:08:05.520 don't think it was on TV a lot. Well, yes, 0:08:05.880 --> 0:08:07.240 you didn't watch a lot of TV and I didn't 0:08:07.240 --> 0:08:09.480 even have cable. Yeah, and I didn't watch much TV 0:08:09.640 --> 0:08:12.560 as a kid. Also, I think, like my family is 0:08:12.640 --> 0:08:16.080 just like not a spooky movie family. I missed a 0:08:16.120 --> 0:08:20.040 lot of spooky movie Like I had never seen hocus 0:08:20.040 --> 0:08:23.440 Pocus until well into my adulthood. Not that that's like 0:08:23.520 --> 0:08:25.560 a scary, but like even just like I mean it 0:08:25.680 --> 0:08:28.760 is like kid, kid, kid, And I think this movie 0:08:29.000 --> 0:08:33.319 is like kids scary, oh my god. Yeah, and also 0:08:33.440 --> 0:08:37.199 like kind of adult scary. Also, I do think like 0:08:37.559 --> 0:08:41.360 there's so much wrong with like I don't like this movie. 0:08:41.440 --> 0:08:44.880 I do think it was a kind of cool, bold 0:08:44.960 --> 0:08:49.320 and interesting choice cool bold interesting. Wow, good words um 0:08:49.600 --> 0:08:54.360 that they thank you that they hired a horror like 0:08:54.440 --> 0:08:59.120 a famous horror director to do this movie. Like he 0:09:00.160 --> 0:09:02.840 took the assignment and he's like, I'm just gonna do 0:09:02.880 --> 0:09:05.200 this like I do my grown up movies. Is that cool? 0:09:05.320 --> 0:09:08.240 And you're like, I don't know. Um. The main thing 0:09:08.280 --> 0:09:10.960 I knew about this movie going in is that it 0:09:11.559 --> 0:09:16.840 traumatized every child who had ever seen it. And I 0:09:16.920 --> 0:09:20.800 understand why because the horror imagery in this movie is 0:09:21.320 --> 0:09:25.800 horrific and I brutally yeah. Yeah, And I'm sure if 0:09:25.840 --> 0:09:28.080 I had seen it as a child, I would have 0:09:28.120 --> 0:09:33.520 been similarly traumatized. And I read that the director Nicholas 0:09:33.600 --> 0:09:37.320 Rogue cut scenes from the movie that he thought would 0:09:37.320 --> 0:09:40.600 be too scary for children after he saw his son's 0:09:40.640 --> 0:09:43.800 reaction to the original HUT, so it was going to 0:09:43.880 --> 0:09:47.839 be even scarier and he cut some of it out. 0:09:48.360 --> 0:09:51.600 That is so gnarly. Uh. I want like just being 0:09:51.679 --> 0:09:54.440 the kid of a horror director and then just being like, 0:09:54.520 --> 0:09:58.000 all right, so if this trauma like you're you being 0:09:58.000 --> 0:10:01.520 traumatized today could say I have other children for being 0:10:01.559 --> 0:10:04.600 traumatized in this exact same way. Do you accept the assignment? 0:10:05.000 --> 0:10:09.400 That's so all. I want Nicholas Rogue's kids to tell 0:10:09.480 --> 0:10:11.920 us what was in the scenes. That's how what would 0:10:11.920 --> 0:10:16.000 they what? I guess? Okay, I don't know. Sorry finished, So, 0:10:16.000 --> 0:10:18.360 so your history is so I hadn't seen the movie, 0:10:18.360 --> 0:10:20.880 but I did read the book as a kid. Oh, 0:10:21.360 --> 0:10:25.000 we had a few Roal Doll books lying around the house, 0:10:25.160 --> 0:10:26.960 and so I probably read this book when I was 0:10:27.840 --> 0:10:32.079 maybe like ten or so. I also read Charlie and 0:10:32.080 --> 0:10:34.160 the Chocolate Factory around that time, but I think those 0:10:34.160 --> 0:10:36.679 are the only two Roal Doll books I ever read. 0:10:36.760 --> 0:10:39.240 But I liked the book The Witches, and I thought 0:10:39.280 --> 0:10:43.439 it was very scary reading it as a kid. Um, 0:10:43.520 --> 0:10:46.800 So I I have, I would say, not even nostalgic 0:10:46.800 --> 0:10:50.760 attachment to this story. But I went into the movie 0:10:51.320 --> 0:10:54.080 knowing what it was going to be about and what 0:10:54.160 --> 0:10:58.000 would happen in it, and remember the story pretty well, 0:10:58.160 --> 0:11:00.640 so like when the events of the movie were unfolding, 0:11:00.679 --> 0:11:03.880 I was like, oh, yeah, that does happen. The ending 0:11:04.080 --> 0:11:07.880 is um quite different in the book. We'll talk about that, 0:11:07.960 --> 0:11:11.800 but uh yeah, I um, I kind of I mean 0:11:12.679 --> 0:11:16.440 for all the traumatic imagery that Nicholas rogue because he 0:11:16.600 --> 0:11:19.880 was really a cinematographer, but like, yeah, like for all 0:11:19.920 --> 0:11:22.280 the traumatic imagery he offers up. I kind of liked 0:11:22.400 --> 0:11:26.000 that they changed the ending of like because the I mean, 0:11:26.160 --> 0:11:28.840 I didn't realize the ending of the book is brutal. 0:11:28.920 --> 0:11:31.000 I think that that's how the reboot ends, where it's 0:11:31.040 --> 0:11:33.880 just like what they're like, the kid is going to 0:11:33.960 --> 0:11:36.800 be a mouse forever and he has nine years to 0:11:36.880 --> 0:11:42.880 live and he knows that. You're like, oh yeah, rough. Yeah. 0:11:42.920 --> 0:11:45.440 So all this to say, I had I was familiar 0:11:45.480 --> 0:11:48.480 with this story going in, but I hadn't seen the movie. 0:11:49.080 --> 0:11:53.160 Definitely would have been traumatized by the imagery as a kid, 0:11:53.400 --> 0:11:56.360 because as even as an adult, I was like, oh my, 0:11:56.679 --> 0:12:00.920 like the transformations, like the scenes of like humans transforming 0:12:01.000 --> 0:12:03.800 into mice. That is some of the scariest ship I've 0:12:03.840 --> 0:12:08.439 ever seen. It's so yeah, this movie would have fucked 0:12:08.480 --> 0:12:11.720 me up. I'm glad I didn't see it when as 0:12:11.760 --> 0:12:15.440 a kid. Yeah, um, shall I do the recap and 0:12:15.440 --> 0:12:18.160 we'll go from there. Let's do the recap and then 0:12:18.360 --> 0:12:22.040 you know what, let's go from there. Okay, fine, we 0:12:22.120 --> 0:12:28.760 will Okay, now we're fighting. Okay. So we open on 0:12:28.800 --> 0:12:34.280 a grandmother telling her grandson Luke, who is we were 0:12:34.360 --> 0:12:36.920 like also recently talking about how we do not know 0:12:37.000 --> 0:12:41.079 how old children are. I guess he's like nine. I 0:12:41.120 --> 0:12:44.719 guess he's canonically nine. Okay, Oh, maybe I'm better at 0:12:44.760 --> 0:12:48.400 this than I thought. She is telling Luke about witches. 0:12:49.040 --> 0:12:53.240 They are evil, they hate children, They basically hunt children 0:12:53.360 --> 0:12:58.040 for sport, and she's lost a finger. Yes to to 0:12:58.280 --> 0:13:01.960 a witch encounter. We press zoom. Maybe that's the scene 0:13:01.960 --> 0:13:04.480 that are cut. Maybe you got to see Angelica Houston 0:13:04.559 --> 0:13:12.360 bite Grandma's finger off. Maybe so. Grandma tells Luke that 0:13:13.200 --> 0:13:17.400 which is dress in ordinary clothes. They look like ordinary women, 0:13:17.440 --> 0:13:21.320 they live ordinary lives, but there are ways to spot 0:13:21.360 --> 0:13:25.880 a real witch. One. They're bald, so they wear wigs 0:13:26.400 --> 0:13:29.920 which itch and give them a scalp rash. Now, if 0:13:29.960 --> 0:13:34.160 the baldest women aren't in charge in this movie, I mean, 0:13:34.480 --> 0:13:40.280 this movie follows the rule. It enforces the rule. It Yeah, 0:13:40.440 --> 0:13:42.599 I didn't even exist when this movie came out and 0:13:42.640 --> 0:13:48.120 people were following that damn rule. Yeah. Um. The second 0:13:48.320 --> 0:13:51.880 telltale sign is that their eyes have like a purplish 0:13:52.360 --> 0:13:56.840 hue to them real which is also don't have toes, 0:13:58.120 --> 0:14:00.440 and so their their feet are just square, so they 0:14:00.480 --> 0:14:05.559 never wear pointed shoes and sure I guess uh. They 0:14:05.679 --> 0:14:10.040 also have a very keen sense of smell and they 0:14:10.040 --> 0:14:13.040 can smell children, and children smell very bad to them, 0:14:13.080 --> 0:14:16.120 and the cleaner child is the stinkier they are to 0:14:16.240 --> 0:14:21.800 a witch. Also, Grandma tells Luke about the grand high witch, 0:14:21.880 --> 0:14:26.920 which is like the leader, which is the leader of 0:14:27.000 --> 0:14:31.480 all the witches. Get it anyway, I get it. I 0:14:31.560 --> 0:14:35.880 get it. So Grandma also tells this story about her 0:14:35.960 --> 0:14:38.880 childhood best friend named Erica, who was abducted by a witch. 0:14:39.480 --> 0:14:41.800 So we get all this backstory about witches. You know, 0:14:42.080 --> 0:14:44.280 I was thinking, I was, I was trying to put 0:14:44.280 --> 0:14:46.240 myself in like baby brain, and I think that I 0:14:46.240 --> 0:14:48.480 would have been afraid of the horror imagery. But I 0:14:48.840 --> 0:14:53.040 but I wonder like and for I am genuinely curious 0:14:53.080 --> 0:14:56.200 for for those who have a nostalgic attachment to this movie, 0:14:56.800 --> 0:15:00.360 were you more scared by the horror imagery? Or were 0:15:00.360 --> 0:15:04.040 you more scared by ever looking at a painting again 0:15:04.240 --> 0:15:07.200 and ever seeing someone in a painting being like that 0:15:07.560 --> 0:15:10.760 they're going to die there? Yeah, that was the scary. 0:15:10.960 --> 0:15:12.680 I was like, that would have sucked me up. That's 0:15:12.800 --> 0:15:16.360 very current because I had that haunted Mandy Moore poster right, 0:15:16.520 --> 0:15:20.520 Oh my gosh, and she still lives there in your poster, 0:15:21.280 --> 0:15:23.600 in my poster. Yeah. It's one of It's one of 0:15:23.600 --> 0:15:27.320 those conspiracy theories where the actress who's been on This 0:15:27.400 --> 0:15:30.320 is Us for five years is a is a double 0:15:30.760 --> 0:15:35.120 switched out by the government. The real Mandy Moore lives 0:15:35.360 --> 0:15:39.440 in your poster still in my childhood bedroom. Yeah, yeah, no, 0:15:39.600 --> 0:15:45.480 I believe it. Yeah. Okay, So one day Luke's parents 0:15:45.560 --> 0:15:50.760 die in an accident, so Grandma becoming this batman him right, Yeah, 0:15:50.920 --> 0:15:55.800 Luke wayne over here with his parents being like, they're 0:15:55.840 --> 0:16:00.160 like bye, and then and then like the police have 0:16:00.240 --> 0:16:03.920 her dress or something. I was like, what happened to that? 0:16:04.040 --> 0:16:08.040 I'm not sure what we were looking at, but Luca 0:16:08.280 --> 0:16:12.760 Luke to them. Luca's orphaned and Grandma becomes his primary caregiver, 0:16:13.080 --> 0:16:16.360 so she takes him to England, where a woman with 0:16:16.400 --> 0:16:20.280 purple eyes tries to give a snake to Luke and 0:16:20.400 --> 0:16:22.120 a chocolate bar, and I'm like, is that a Willy 0:16:22.240 --> 0:16:25.760 Wonka chocolate bar? Are we? You know? Are we what's 0:16:25.800 --> 0:16:28.320 happening here? We're going to really? I mean we talked 0:16:28.360 --> 0:16:31.160 about it until the Tupit just like the way rold 0:16:31.240 --> 0:16:38.080 Doll turns food into weapons is so oh gosh. Yeah, 0:16:38.120 --> 0:16:40.520 I will say this first witch. I liked her a 0:16:40.520 --> 0:16:44.920 lot and I she had perfect teeth. Okay, yeah, another 0:16:44.920 --> 0:16:48.680 telltale sign of witches. I have shitty I think I 0:16:48.960 --> 0:16:51.200 just have gum disease. So when someone has nice teeth, 0:16:51.200 --> 0:16:57.720 I'm like, okay, who are you a millionaire? Okay? So 0:16:57.760 --> 0:17:02.200 then on Luke's birthday, Grandma gives him some mice, which 0:17:02.200 --> 0:17:07.359 he names William and Mary. Horrible gift, I gift bad 0:17:07.400 --> 0:17:11.199 mice names. There, I said it are they kids? I 0:17:11.240 --> 0:17:14.760 don't think because they can't talk. They're just mice, right, 0:17:14.880 --> 0:17:20.600 And they're not from the Henson the Creature the creature shop, right, Yeah, yeah, 0:17:20.800 --> 0:17:26.560 they're just another yeah. But oh no. Grandma collapses, she 0:17:26.720 --> 0:17:30.000 has fallen ill. Turns out she has diabetes. But when 0:17:30.000 --> 0:17:34.040 she recovers, she takes Luke and his mice on a 0:17:34.119 --> 0:17:38.200 little trip to a hotel by the sea to Casa 0:17:38.280 --> 0:17:45.440 day Mr Bean. Mr Bean is the hotel manager. Also 0:17:45.520 --> 0:17:49.439 at this hotel, dozens of women show up for the 0:17:49.520 --> 0:17:53.600 convention for the Royal Society for the Prevention of Cruelty 0:17:53.680 --> 0:17:57.160 to Children. And that's the most prepositions I've ever said 0:17:57.160 --> 0:18:00.480 in a single sentence. That is that of all the 0:18:01.200 --> 0:18:04.159 that gotta chuckle out of me, because I was like, 0:18:04.280 --> 0:18:09.400 that's the witch there? Um, did you pick up on? 0:18:09.640 --> 0:18:13.480 This is so goofy? But they made a diabetes joke 0:18:13.560 --> 0:18:16.320 in this movie. I was like, that's the most there's 0:18:16.359 --> 0:18:18.479 not a lot of things about this movie outside of 0:18:18.520 --> 0:18:21.359 the wild number of tropes that are used in a 0:18:21.359 --> 0:18:25.640 bad way. But like, this movie isn't like especially dated 0:18:26.040 --> 0:18:27.720 to me. I guess a little bit with the clothes, 0:18:27.760 --> 0:18:29.840 but most world all movies kind of feel a little 0:18:29.840 --> 0:18:32.600 bit like out of time. But they just drop a 0:18:32.680 --> 0:18:36.880 diabetes joke, like yeah, and that commercial didn't exist till 0:18:38.000 --> 0:18:41.040 I was like, damn, you're showing your hands. You couldn't 0:18:41.040 --> 0:18:43.920 you couldn't resist making a nine year old said diabetes 0:18:44.960 --> 0:18:53.399 tomfoolery indeed. Okay, So Angelica Houston has entered the film. 0:18:54.359 --> 0:18:58.879 She seems to be the leader of this royal Society 0:18:58.960 --> 0:19:01.520 for the Prevention of cruel teacher children, and she's so 0:19:01.600 --> 0:19:04.560 hot and she's very hot. Her name is Miss Ernst, 0:19:05.440 --> 0:19:09.680 and the women adore her. And then there's some little 0:19:09.720 --> 0:19:14.440 clues that seems like maybe these are not women who 0:19:14.720 --> 0:19:18.560 want to prevent cruelty to children, but maybe they want 0:19:18.600 --> 0:19:23.640 to cause cruelty to children because maybe they're witches. Oh 0:19:23.680 --> 0:19:27.199 there is I mean, I I you know, exploiting the 0:19:27.280 --> 0:19:33.000 inherent sinister nature of a hotel convention is kind of fun. Yeah, 0:19:33.080 --> 0:19:36.600 that's a fun idea. Um, I'm trying to figure out 0:19:36.720 --> 0:19:40.520 is this this movie came out, this is the year 0:19:40.600 --> 0:19:44.000 before The Adams Family, So this is I feel like 0:19:44.320 --> 0:19:47.520 Angela Houston's She's just she's just warming up for the 0:19:47.560 --> 0:19:51.840 main events for more Tisia. Yeah, definitely. Okay. So then 0:19:51.960 --> 0:19:56.400 Luke explores the hotel. He meets another boy named Bruno. 0:19:57.480 --> 0:20:03.359 Luke gets yelled at by Mr Bean for having loose mice, 0:20:03.880 --> 0:20:08.000 and we're literally like Mr Bean and you can't you 0:20:08.040 --> 0:20:10.399 can't done see it? Yeah, And then we're also like, 0:20:10.440 --> 0:20:13.000 I guess this is for all these these mice are 0:20:13.080 --> 0:20:19.760 like foreshadowing Chekhov's Mouse. Yeah, okay. So Luke is like 0:20:19.800 --> 0:20:22.840 running around the hotel and he winds up in this 0:20:22.920 --> 0:20:27.919 big room where the women from the Society for the 0:20:27.960 --> 0:20:30.800 Prevention of Cruelty to Children a k a. The Witches 0:20:31.119 --> 0:20:34.000 come in and gather for a meeting, and Luke is 0:20:34.040 --> 0:20:36.480 hiding in the corner and he watches as all the 0:20:36.520 --> 0:20:40.159 women remove their shoes and their wigs because guess what, 0:20:40.720 --> 0:20:44.199 confirmed they are witches. I thought it was really funny 0:20:44.280 --> 0:20:47.240 that she has her like Angela he used, and takes 0:20:47.240 --> 0:20:50.480 her face halfway off before being like, oh wait, is 0:20:50.520 --> 0:20:55.199 the door closed. That was when I started coming up 0:20:55.240 --> 0:20:58.719 with my um tory story theory, where I'm just like, 0:20:58.760 --> 0:21:01.840 this is applying the lodge of toy story, but instead 0:21:01.880 --> 0:21:04.760 it's just leaving a bunch of women over thirty five 0:21:04.800 --> 0:21:08.880 in a room alone, and then they turned into evil witches. 0:21:09.200 --> 0:21:12.119 And that is true. That does happen in real life. 0:21:12.840 --> 0:21:16.840 So miss Ernst takes off her face mask because she's 0:21:16.920 --> 0:21:22.919 the Grand High Witch with a scary face. Miss Ernst 0:21:23.040 --> 0:21:27.240 is like, you witches are a disgrace. You're not killing 0:21:27.400 --> 0:21:32.439 enough children, and that's why I created formula eighties six, 0:21:32.960 --> 0:21:39.040 which turns children into mice. Another toy story parallel. Much 0:21:39.119 --> 0:21:43.879 like the character said, miss Ernst is a scientific genius 0:21:43.960 --> 0:21:48.000 who just needs her energy directed in a more positive 0:21:48.040 --> 0:21:51.680 direction where yeah, she could really help people, much like 0:21:52.080 --> 0:21:55.880 Sid's parents should have just been like, you're a creative kid, 0:21:56.560 --> 0:22:00.479 let's let's take you to it after school program. Anywow, Okay, 0:22:00.520 --> 0:22:04.160 I'm starting to see the toy story parallels. That's it. 0:22:04.280 --> 0:22:08.800 That's the end of the similarities. Yeah, okay, So she's 0:22:08.800 --> 0:22:11.879 talking about this formula that turns children into mice, and 0:22:11.920 --> 0:22:15.960 she demonstrates it on that kid Bruno, who she has 0:22:16.040 --> 0:22:19.600 lured into the room with chocolate. She has already given 0:22:19.680 --> 0:22:22.679 him the formula. It works on like a time delay, 0:22:22.960 --> 0:22:26.240 and then the witches and Luke, who is still hiding 0:22:26.240 --> 0:22:30.080 in the corner, watch as Bruno transforms into a mouse. 0:22:30.720 --> 0:22:33.760 That transformation is also like truly one of the scariest 0:22:33.800 --> 0:22:37.840 things I've ever seen. Yeah, I mean that the raw 0:22:38.119 --> 0:22:43.840 fucking body horror and this um is just like it is, 0:22:44.560 --> 0:22:47.919 and that I mean that whole scene that is so long. 0:22:48.000 --> 0:22:49.800 That was the other thing where I was just like, Wow, 0:22:49.880 --> 0:22:52.119 this movie gets a lot of mileage out of like 0:22:52.359 --> 0:22:57.320 very very few locations. But in any case, that scene 0:22:57.359 --> 0:23:00.440 is so loaded. But just even on its face is Oh, 0:23:00.480 --> 0:23:02.479 that would have scared the ship out of me. As 0:23:02.520 --> 0:23:07.760 a kid. Roll hates when children are hungry. What is 0:23:07.800 --> 0:23:14.560 wrong with him? He's like, if you're hungry, you're gonna explode. 0:23:13.720 --> 0:23:18.080 You're gonna too bad. Oh, he's such a fucking asshole. 0:23:18.200 --> 0:23:21.560 Like you know, I did to say the least, but like, yeah, 0:23:21.600 --> 0:23:25.119 that was that and to have like this was I 0:23:25.160 --> 0:23:27.359 think this was like the last movie that Jim Henson 0:23:27.520 --> 0:23:32.399 was well enough to work on. And he's really uh 0:23:33.240 --> 0:23:36.680 he put the creature shop to work. It's so fucking scary. 0:23:37.160 --> 0:23:40.720 So again, we like listeners. If you happened to see 0:23:41.240 --> 0:23:45.560 the reboot while it was still available for streaming, we 0:23:45.640 --> 0:23:48.680 couldn't watch it, but I'm assuming that it was probably 0:23:48.800 --> 0:23:51.600 less scary in the new one, because there's like you 0:23:51.640 --> 0:23:54.560 can just sort of do a boring c G I like, 0:23:54.760 --> 0:23:57.960 I'm a mouse, but like with the practical effects, it 0:23:58.119 --> 0:24:02.560 is so gnarly. It is brew a truly. Yeah. Okay, 0:24:02.600 --> 0:24:06.120 So the meeting is about to disperse, but then one 0:24:06.119 --> 0:24:10.359 of the witches smells Luke. They find him. They chase 0:24:10.440 --> 0:24:14.159 him around for a bit and eventually catch him and 0:24:14.200 --> 0:24:18.840 Miss Ernst gives him five hundred doses of formula six, 0:24:19.240 --> 0:24:23.479 which transforms Luke into a mouse immediately, and the witches 0:24:23.480 --> 0:24:25.840 trying to step on him and kill him, but mouse 0:24:25.920 --> 0:24:29.680 Luke runs away. He finds mouse Bruno. They can both 0:24:29.840 --> 0:24:34.000 still talk, so they scurry through the d talk about Bruno. 0:24:34.160 --> 0:24:38.520 In this movie, they never hesitate to talk about Bruno. Yeah, 0:24:38.680 --> 0:24:43.639 that was the exact laugh I was hoping for. And 0:24:43.880 --> 0:24:46.360 Grandma especially is trying to talk about Bruno. She's trying 0:24:46.400 --> 0:24:49.679 to tell his parents about b and they are not 0:24:49.800 --> 0:24:52.440 having it. The parents are sort of like, we don't 0:24:52.440 --> 0:24:57.000 talk about Bruno, not during whiskey and sherry time, and 0:24:57.040 --> 0:25:00.280 she's like, we needed to wow the parallels. Did you 0:25:00.320 --> 0:25:05.720 recognize Bruno's mom? No, she is played by Brenda bleth 0:25:05.800 --> 0:25:09.680 In a k a. Mrs Bennett from Pride and Prejudice 0:25:09.720 --> 0:25:13.920 two thousand five. Wow. I did not. Wow. I guess 0:25:13.960 --> 0:25:16.359 that she was really in her nineties hair bag because 0:25:16.400 --> 0:25:19.840 I didn't notice. That's like, I have a thought on 0:25:20.000 --> 0:25:22.960 that character as well, too, but like, for now, all 0:25:23.000 --> 0:25:26.960 I'll say is she really knows how to give a 0:25:27.080 --> 0:25:33.600 surprised face. True. Alright, So the two mice boys scurry 0:25:33.680 --> 0:25:37.440 through the hotel back to Luke's grandma's room, and Luke 0:25:37.600 --> 0:25:42.600 is like, hey, Grandma, so I got turned into a 0:25:42.640 --> 0:25:46.440 mouse by some witches. And also, is it just me 0:25:46.640 --> 0:25:51.040 or did Grandma barely react to the information that her 0:25:51.320 --> 0:25:54.840 so grandson is a mouse? Snow? I thought that too, 0:25:54.880 --> 0:25:58.320 And then I'm just like, she's been I guess, ostensibly 0:25:58.920 --> 0:26:02.119 hunting witches for years? Does she like, no, this is 0:26:02.160 --> 0:26:04.919 on the table? Angelica Houston sounded like it was a 0:26:04.920 --> 0:26:07.960