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Speaker 1: Santa calls the police on a crackhead. It doesn't end well.

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Speaker 1: Well that that's that sounds like a precarious scenario.

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Speaker 2: I think you should make sure that crackhead has a

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Speaker 2: white Christmas and give them all the duck they could

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Speaker 2: ever want.

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Speaker 1: That's that's so true. That's so true.

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Speaker 2: Sanna got in a sack oh oh, crack.

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Speaker 1: By the way, this is a this is a real

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Speaker 1: life story sent in by the r slash okop shows subredd.

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Speaker 1: It's very own flufy Kenzo flopy Kenzo, so big shot.

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Speaker 2: I appreciate you. I'm pointing at you at the camera,

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Speaker 2: but most of your probably listening audio.

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Speaker 1: We hear you, and we love you. And yeah, we

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Speaker 1: can't wait to read your story. That's right, and now

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Speaker 1: onto the crackhead.

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Speaker 2: Let's do it. Let's hear this. Crackhead.

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Speaker 1: I was looking through my old yearbook from fifth grade

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Speaker 1: and it triggered a rather funny memory. Okay, I twenty male,

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Speaker 1: have graduated high school two years ago now, but back

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Speaker 1: when I was in fifth grade, I had the most

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Speaker 1: strange and funny accounter with a lady Hi.

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Speaker 2: On crack Ah crack Eye. I love crack Eye. It

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Speaker 2: is my favorite kind of.

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Speaker 1: I At the time, my old house was in front

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Speaker 1: of a park where the bus stop was for school.

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Speaker 1: Me and this other kid were the only ones at

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Speaker 1: the stop. I don't remember his name, so I'll call

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Speaker 1: him crackhead Timmy, Timmy the crack egg. How's a ring

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Speaker 1: to it?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it does.

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Speaker 1: You see, Timmy is a little strange. Oh he had

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Speaker 1: a weird obsession with Nicki Minaj when she was a

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Speaker 1: pop star and not doing as much rap like she does. Now, okay, Uh,

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Speaker 1: not that strange to be. Not Timmy the fifth grade crack.

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Speaker 1: This is the guy that showed up to his bus stop. Okay, okay,

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Speaker 1: we're up. This beed now. Oh my god, that's funny.

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Speaker 2: Uh.

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Speaker 1: And this particular morning was routine, just like any other,

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Speaker 1: or so I thought. Inter crazy lady on.

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Speaker 2: Crack a crazy crack lady, let's go.

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Speaker 1: That's right. At the same time, the Karen term didn't exist,

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Speaker 1: but looking back then, she perfectly fit the description hair

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Speaker 1: and everything crack.

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Speaker 2: You heard of cancer Karen, but you heard of crackhead Karen.

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Speaker 1: Oh my god. A new a new characters into the sphere. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: an kop universe. What is it like like an MCU

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Speaker 1: or whatever. Okop you okopu.

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Speaker 2: That's funny extincts like Sallad.

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Speaker 1: Throwback to the last point five episode. So she was

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Speaker 1: just like a Karen, except instead of crack yeah, instead

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Speaker 1: of her acting like a wild Karen, she began to

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Speaker 1: drill me and Timmy about a guy named Robert who

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Speaker 1: owed fifty thousand dollars of that money. You really can't.

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Speaker 1: Both of us were pretty confused, and it got weirder

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Speaker 1: when she asked about Robert, and she asked about what

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Speaker 1: we were talking about.

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Speaker 2: Cold on crackhead, Karen, mind your business.

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Speaker 1: We figured out that she was doing lines of snow,

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Speaker 1: and she was straight up offered us some We were

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Speaker 1: ten to eleven Jesus, and also, hey, that's a hospitable

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Speaker 1: thing to do. I mean that's you know, sharing is

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Speaker 1: Karen if you ask.

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Speaker 2: Me, yeah, sharing is Karen. Sharing is Karen.

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Speaker 1: It also happened to be garbage day, so a garbage

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Speaker 1: truck rolled down the street and she told us wait here,

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna ask him about Robert. The nearest trash can

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Speaker 1: away from us was like halfway down the street, relatively far.

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Speaker 1: We were so confused as she suddenly remembered this mysterious Robert.

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Speaker 1: We received a shock when she ran chasing the garbage

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Speaker 1: truck on foot. Now, mind you, this garbage shark was

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Speaker 1: probably going fifty to twenty miles per hour yo, and

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Speaker 1: she kept.

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Speaker 2: It up with Joe crackhead Karen. She needs to go

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Speaker 2: to the Olympics, the crack Olympic.

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Speaker 1: Oh my god, Oh my god, Oh my god.

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Speaker 2: I would I would pay to see that.

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Speaker 1: Honestly, watch South of the Centure.

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Speaker 2: Way more than the regular place.

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Speaker 1: Oh, oh my god. We both hastily got our stuff

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Speaker 1: and made our way to the bus before crackhead Karen

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Speaker 1: Cuckoo coov return. Our bus driver, whom we called Sam

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Speaker 1: Santa due to his spitting image, was theirs normal and

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Speaker 1: said good morning. Santa's pretty nice, but piss him off

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Speaker 1: and he's no jolly Saint. Nick. As we climbed into

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Speaker 1: the stairs of the bus, Timmy pointed out that this

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Speaker 1: lady's zipper was undone. I could only guess that she

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Speaker 1: did the nasty with Robert and he gave her crack and,

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Speaker 1: according to her, owed her fifty thousand dollars.

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Speaker 2: Is Robert indulged to oh, this woman fifty thousand dollars

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Speaker 2: in crash gravy.

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Speaker 1: To my surprise, she suddenly appeared on the bus. She

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Speaker 1: just operated.

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Speaker 2: Inside that this is impressive, and she freaking ran all

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Speaker 2: the way back, all the way back and just like

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Speaker 2: appeared to the bus.

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Speaker 1: She must have gained super speed because she was pretty

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Speaker 1: far away talking to the garbage man.

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Speaker 2: He's doing more than talking.

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Speaker 1: Seriously. Santa saw her and asked, what are you doing

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Speaker 1: in my bus? Are you the parent of Timmy? Which

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Speaker 1: is so sad because he had just assumed, like I

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Speaker 1: guess with the strangeness that was his mom. I moved

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Speaker 1: to the back with my friend we'll call him Bob,

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Speaker 1: and I watched. She responded, claiming she was the FBI

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Speaker 1: and she was escorting two chill into school.

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Speaker 2: Oh my god, this is so dangerous.

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Speaker 1: Bro, this is really bad. She must have forgot about

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Speaker 1: me because she pointed to Timmy and in some other

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Speaker 1: random kids. Santa asked her to leave, but she got

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Speaker 1: got angry. After the third time, he threatened to call

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Speaker 1: the police, and he did when she decided to take

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Speaker 1: an empty seat. Oh my god, I don't remember much

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Speaker 1: about that time, but what from Timmy told me? She

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Speaker 1: was taken off the bus by two officers attempted to

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Speaker 1: run and was tasered to stop her from getting away.

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Speaker 1: I remember this vividly because of how creepy and funny

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Speaker 1: this whole thing was about how Santa had a crackhead arrested.

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Speaker 2: Wow, oh my, dude, that sounds dangerous.

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Speaker 1: Dude, I'm worried about you.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, please stay safe. Those crackheads are an old joke, dude,

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Speaker 2: just for real, for real. Actually, one of my friends

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Speaker 2: in college, Ehan, was walking down the street and there

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Speaker 2: was this like crackhead that was like making like like

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Speaker 2: sexual comments to some of his girlfriends as they were walking,

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Speaker 2: and he was like heyo, dude, like stop doing that.

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Speaker 2: And the guy was like, let me tell you. Something

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Speaker 2: goes up to you. Shan just clowks him in the face,

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Speaker 2: punches him right in the face, and WASH's like, you know, wrestled,

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Speaker 2: and he's like a decently strong guy and was about

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Speaker 2: to like clap back, but then his girlfriend's like, dude,

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Speaker 2: it's not worth it. Don't get in a fight with

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Speaker 2: a homeless man and he's got nothing to lose. Oh my,

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Speaker 2: and then left. But like, like you know, they could

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Speaker 2: go violin pretty quick, So stay safe from the crackheads

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Speaker 2: out there, and if you really want to stay safe

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Speaker 2: and add some extra good luck for your day, go

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Speaker 2: to our slash Okop show and literally say your story

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Speaker 2: so we can read them.

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Speaker 1: That's right, Send him in, baby,