WEBVTT - Beyond Being Seen with Devi Brown 0:00:05.000 --> 0:00:09.040 Welcome to Deeply Well. This show is a soft place. 0:00:08.760 --> 0:00:10.640 To land on your journey, a. 0:00:10.600 --> 0:00:14.200 Space where we explore what it truly means to live 0:00:14.280 --> 0:00:19.960 well from the inside out, not perfectly, but honestly, with 0:00:20.000 --> 0:00:24.200 all the complexity, the paradox, the beauty, and the wonder 0:00:24.400 --> 0:00:28.120 of being human. Because in a world that is constantly 0:00:28.160 --> 0:00:31.520 pulling at us, this is the space to come back 0:00:31.560 --> 0:00:32.919 to yourself, to. 0:00:32.920 --> 0:00:37.040 Your body, your truth, to the practices. 0:00:36.479 --> 0:00:40.559 That genuinely sustain you, the ones that work when life 0:00:40.640 --> 0:00:46.200 is actually happening. This show is for the seekers, the creatives, 0:00:46.760 --> 0:00:51.680 the sensitive ones, for everyone doing the quiet, courageous work 0:00:52.280 --> 0:01:00.480 of becoming whole. This is Deeply Well. Welcome back to Well. 0:01:00.760 --> 0:01:04.200 I'm Debbie Brown. I am so grateful you're here, and 0:01:04.319 --> 0:01:07.200 wherever this conversation finds you today, I hope that you 0:01:07.240 --> 0:01:11.919 can receive it as an invitation to slow down, to reconnect, 0:01:12.520 --> 0:01:16.240 and to become a little more present with yourself. 0:01:17.400 --> 0:01:18.919 Life is hard. 0:01:19.400 --> 0:01:22.880 That is like a sentence I'm leading with in everything lately. 0:01:23.000 --> 0:01:27.000 Life is hard, and I think that's a given for everyone, 0:01:27.200 --> 0:01:28.520 even on the best day. 0:01:28.760 --> 0:01:30.480 Right Earth is a lot. 0:01:31.120 --> 0:01:34.720 So my intention always with this show, whether we are 0:01:34.920 --> 0:01:38.319 talking to you know an amazing person. Whether we're diving 0:01:38.360 --> 0:01:42.600 into some of my experiences, whether we're processing flowing any 0:01:42.640 --> 0:01:46.160 of it, it's to help relieve some of the inner 0:01:46.160 --> 0:01:50.320 suffering that we all carry being alive and make it 0:01:50.360 --> 0:01:56.000 feel joyful, worth it, fine, enthusiasm where it's present, and 0:01:57.520 --> 0:02:00.480 more than anything, just self actualized to the best of 0:02:00.480 --> 0:02:05.880 our ability. Okay, today's episode is inspired by two experiences 0:02:05.880 --> 0:02:10.239 that I had that, although very different, I felt beautifully 0:02:10.400 --> 0:02:14.600 compliment one another and also provided some interesting contrasts for me. 0:02:15.200 --> 0:02:17.200 So I want to invite you into this experience that 0:02:17.280 --> 0:02:18.680 I have. If you are a. 0:02:18.639 --> 0:02:21.120 Listener of the show, you know I have talked about 0:02:22.639 --> 0:02:27.880 living with chronic pain conditions and living with an autoimmune condition. 0:02:28.160 --> 0:02:30.840 And so for all of my chronic pain girlies out there, 0:02:31.480 --> 0:02:35.040 or anyone who is just kind of discovering their health, 0:02:35.160 --> 0:02:38.840 maybe suffering with their health right now, or looking to 0:02:39.120 --> 0:02:43.920 implement practices of longevity so that for the length of 0:02:43.960 --> 0:02:48.240 your life you can continue to nourish yourself and feel 0:02:48.320 --> 0:02:51.040 like yourself, this episode. 0:02:50.720 --> 0:02:51.080 Is for you. 0:02:51.200 --> 0:02:54.520 I had an experience that I've never done before. I 0:02:54.600 --> 0:02:57.200 am somebody that if you have not picked this up 0:02:57.240 --> 0:03:01.000 from the show or my Instagram. I have been biohacking 0:03:01.160 --> 0:03:06.680 all the things. I would say somewhere around what year 0:03:06.720 --> 0:03:10.960 is it like, maybe fourteen years. I used to have, 0:03:11.200 --> 0:03:16.359 you know, an opportunity to get a lot of frontline resources. 0:03:16.440 --> 0:03:19.080 I was connected to the athletic world, to the NFL 0:03:19.160 --> 0:03:22.400 world many years ago, and from that I learned so 0:03:22.680 --> 0:03:25.799 much about bodies and my bodies, and I was getting 0:03:25.919 --> 0:03:29.440 testing done back then that I didn't know eventually would 0:03:29.480 --> 0:03:33.320 become you know, some of the pillars of the longevity 0:03:33.360 --> 0:03:37.000 work that's available now. So it's been incredible really watching 0:03:37.040 --> 0:03:41.560 that industry grow and watching my own connection to my 0:03:41.720 --> 0:03:44.520 health and my self advocacy for my health has grown. 0:03:44.680 --> 0:03:51.120 For anyone that has a chronic pain condition or something 0:03:51.120 --> 0:03:54.240 that you've been trying to understand. I also have this 0:03:54.320 --> 0:03:57.720 experience having ADHD, and you know, it taking my. 0:03:57.680 --> 0:03:59.040 Whole life to figure that out. 0:03:59.160 --> 0:04:01.600 But if you've been on one of those searches of 0:04:01.760 --> 0:04:06.960 trying to understand your inner working and you're inner wiring, one, 0:04:07.280 --> 0:04:11.520 you know it's been a journey, a lifelong journey, and 0:04:11.640 --> 0:04:18.040 two you've probably realized that you either get absolutely exhausted 0:04:19.000 --> 0:04:24.040 trying to explain yourself to doctors or to various practitioners, 0:04:25.560 --> 0:04:29.520 or you become really a master of your personal domain 0:04:29.640 --> 0:04:33.000 and you're coming in and able to really advocate with 0:04:33.080 --> 0:04:36.040 a lot of power, with a lot of authenticity, and 0:04:36.120 --> 0:04:39.440 you have your receipts, and so it's interesting living that 0:04:39.560 --> 0:04:42.719 life and those that live it, you know exactly. 0:04:42.120 --> 0:04:42.760 What I'm saying. 0:04:43.400 --> 0:04:46.919 Sometimes you walk in with doctors and they're kind of 0:04:46.920 --> 0:04:49.719 annoyed that you know so much about yourself and looking 0:04:49.839 --> 0:04:55.680 to kind of counteract your intuition or the understandings that 0:04:55.720 --> 0:04:59.760 you've come through or not listen. And sometimes you're blessed 0:04:59.760 --> 0:05:02.800 with doctors that are fascinated about the work that they 0:05:02.839 --> 0:05:06.320 do and they're always looking to learn and find solutions 0:05:06.360 --> 0:05:09.719 and collaborate with patients. But you never quite know what 0:05:09.800 --> 0:05:11.680 you're going to get. So as I get ready to 0:05:11.720 --> 0:05:14.440 share this experience that I had, I'm kind of giving 0:05:14.440 --> 0:05:18.320 you the big lead in because I found that I 0:05:18.640 --> 0:05:24.280 had the opportunity to really be disarmed and this experience 0:05:24.320 --> 0:05:28.000 that I had and really be nourished and changed. 0:05:27.600 --> 0:05:29.160 By the experience that I had. 0:05:30.640 --> 0:05:32.560 And so I want to invite you to learn about 0:05:32.600 --> 0:05:35.240 this with me, but then to also find a way 0:05:35.400 --> 0:05:39.480 to if it resonates see how you may be able 0:05:39.480 --> 0:05:42.200 to bring it to life in your world. So I 0:05:42.279 --> 0:05:44.560 recently this past week for several days. If you watch 0:05:44.640 --> 0:05:48.880 my stories, you saw some wild things. I recently returned 0:05:48.920 --> 0:05:54.120 from spending several days at the Shaw Wellness Clinic in Cancun, Mexico. 0:05:54.800 --> 0:05:59.000 So Shaw Wellness, that's Sha Wellness is a space that's 0:05:59.040 --> 0:06:04.240 dedicated to the inner of modern medicine, holistic therapies, nutrition, 0:06:04.960 --> 0:06:09.120 mindfulness and longevity. And my experience there was really a 0:06:09.120 --> 0:06:13.880 reminder that well being is never something that we just 0:06:14.000 --> 0:06:14.760 stumble upon. 0:06:15.480 --> 0:06:16.440 It's something that you. 0:06:16.480 --> 0:06:21.640 Have to really intentionally cultivate through the environment that we create, 0:06:22.040 --> 0:06:25.360 the habits that we practice, and the relationship that is 0:06:25.400 --> 0:06:28.320 ever growing that we have with ourselves and our bodies. 0:06:28.880 --> 0:06:33.240 We're also entering the annual lions Gate Portal My God 0:06:33.320 --> 0:06:37.760 and a whole lot of supercharged astrology for August twenty 0:06:37.839 --> 0:06:42.520 twenty six. I am an astrology girly. I have been 0:06:42.560 --> 0:06:45.800 obsessed with astrology since I was a child, but very 0:06:45.839 --> 0:06:49.760 actively studying it since right around eighteen or nineteen, when 0:06:49.760 --> 0:06:53.719 I had my first big birth chart in depth birth chart. 0:06:53.560 --> 0:06:59.159 Reading twenty three years ago. Yikes. 0:06:59.200 --> 0:07:01.719 And so this time of year I've always found that 0:07:01.800 --> 0:07:07.440 I naturally gravitate to summer being pretty potent for me, 0:07:07.600 --> 0:07:09.040 pretty magnetic. 0:07:08.839 --> 0:07:10.080 Usually deeply healing. 0:07:10.920 --> 0:07:14.320 July tends to be a little tumultuous, which this year 0:07:14.360 --> 0:07:19.920 it was too in mercury retrograde. Whooped that ass, my god. 0:07:21.760 --> 0:07:24.640 But I always feel this. I always thought it was. 0:07:24.680 --> 0:07:26.640 Due to my birthday in June and that kind of 0:07:26.720 --> 0:07:32.880 solar return portal, you know, kind of happening. But August 0:07:33.040 --> 0:07:40.400 is that girl like August is so potent astrologically for 0:07:40.480 --> 0:07:44.560 all the transformation, the potential of all the transformation that 0:07:44.560 --> 0:07:47.080 can take place throughout the whole year. And I found 0:07:47.160 --> 0:07:51.840 that most specifically whenever I work with the annual Lionsgate portal, 0:07:53.800 --> 0:07:57.120 big release and big magic tends to happen in my life. 0:07:57.360 --> 0:08:00.680 Just really in the way I invite everyone to use astrology, 0:08:00.720 --> 0:08:03.080 whether you're super into it like some of us, or 0:08:03.200 --> 0:08:06.400 just kind of you know, just looking on the outside 0:08:06.400 --> 0:08:09.200 at your son's sign, or not into it at all. 0:08:11.800 --> 0:08:15.200 You know, the magic is in your own self inquiry. 0:08:15.560 --> 0:08:18.840 That's what I found when it comes to astrology. It's 0:08:19.000 --> 0:08:22.960 reading what the potential of the energy is and finding 0:08:23.000 --> 0:08:25.640 a way to maximize it. For yourself, and sometimes that 0:08:25.680 --> 0:08:28.400 means maximizing the grief because you can read in the 0:08:29.000 --> 0:08:32.640 transits or the astrology that perhaps you know what you 0:08:32.640 --> 0:08:35.600 could judge as a rough periodist coming up. And then 0:08:35.640 --> 0:08:38.000 it's saying, how do I dive into that more deeply? 0:08:38.800 --> 0:08:41.520 How do I use you know, this energy to really 0:08:41.559 --> 0:08:43.920 think about myself and my life and what can be 0:08:44.040 --> 0:08:47.360 transformed and surrender to it. And then you have periods 0:08:47.360 --> 0:08:49.960 of astrology a lot like was what is happening in 0:08:50.000 --> 0:08:54.000 many ways this month that also lean into you know, 0:08:54.080 --> 0:08:56.880 what is the possibility for the power in my life? 0:08:58.080 --> 0:08:59.920 Something I want to avoid as I talk about this 0:09:00.080 --> 0:09:02.240 astrology and eventually I want to talk about it in 0:09:02.240 --> 0:09:07.880 another episode. Please don't set intentions around being or feeling seen. 0:09:08.520 --> 0:09:12.640 That's my personal urge and directive for each one. I 0:09:12.679 --> 0:09:16.920 think everyone is overly obsessed. I just hear it everywhere 0:09:16.960 --> 0:09:20.120 all the time, being seen. I want to be seen, 0:09:20.200 --> 0:09:23.280 and I really invite everyone what does that actually mean 0:09:23.320 --> 0:09:26.400 to you and what is it that you think is unseen? 0:09:26.600 --> 0:09:28.400 I've explored this a little bit on the show in 0:09:28.440 --> 0:09:30.880 the past, but it feels really resonant right now because 0:09:30.880 --> 0:09:34.800 I think a lot of people are really giving away 0:09:34.840 --> 0:09:39.000 their power by searching for this idea, this belief that 0:09:40.520 --> 0:09:43.200 everyone can fully see you or that's even how it's 0:09:43.280 --> 0:09:47.680 designed to be. And I just really urge people to connect, like, 0:09:47.720 --> 0:09:49.760 what are you really longing for? And when did that 0:09:49.800 --> 0:09:52.840 longing start? What version of you do you need to 0:09:52.880 --> 0:09:55.960 send a little more love to that felt unseen, maybe 0:09:55.960 --> 0:09:59.679 in your own household, because the greater world is never 0:09:59.720 --> 0:10:01.480 going to be meet that need for any of us. 0:10:02.280 --> 0:10:07.240 I've met so many people on such spectrums of quote 0:10:07.320 --> 0:10:13.280 unquote being seen from the biggest superstars imaginable to you know, 0:10:13.559 --> 0:10:17.240 just us every day folks, you know, doing doing whatever 0:10:17.360 --> 0:10:21.880 needs to be done. But no matter where you land, 0:10:22.200 --> 0:10:26.600 absolutely no one has a sense that you're seen in 0:10:26.640 --> 0:10:31.560 a way that repairs everything else in your life just 0:10:31.679 --> 0:10:35.280 by that. Sometimes there is a deeper desire to be witnessed, 0:10:35.480 --> 0:10:40.120 to be appreciated at work, to be appreciated in your household. 0:10:40.679 --> 0:10:43.040 But I think it's so important that we don't outsource 0:10:43.280 --> 0:10:47.040 our power by saying that the only way to meet 0:10:47.080 --> 0:10:50.920 that need is through the gaze of another person or 0:10:50.920 --> 0:10:54.480 through the validation of another person. So if that is 0:10:54.520 --> 0:10:56.400 a theme that is coming up for you as you 0:10:56.440 --> 0:10:59.839 hear this one. I recognize there may be some ch 0:11:00.320 --> 0:11:03.840 and even hearing me say this, but investigate what the 0:11:03.920 --> 0:11:09.000 need actually is and what you think you'll feel and 0:11:09.080 --> 0:11:14.120 receive when you are quote unquote seen and what see? 0:11:15.640 --> 0:11:18.520 What is the definition for that? How are you defining 0:11:18.559 --> 0:11:19.160 that word? 0:11:19.559 --> 0:11:22.000 See? N scene? 0:11:23.520 --> 0:11:26.800 What is under that umbrella? What is the descriptive of that? 0:11:26.800 --> 0:11:31.360 That feels like that's what the cure is for you? 0:11:31.679 --> 0:11:33.840 I'm just seeing it everywhere, And I think it's so 0:11:33.960 --> 0:11:37.839 important to talk about because you're wasting time. No one 0:11:37.920 --> 0:11:40.079 is ever going to fully see you like most of 0:11:40.120 --> 0:11:42.640 your parents don't, most of your family members don't. Like 0:11:42.679 --> 0:11:46.480 this is life, this is the human experience. But do 0:11:46.559 --> 0:11:48.360 you see you? 0:11:48.360 --> 0:11:50.520 You know, I've had many seasons of. 0:11:52.040 --> 0:11:56.200 Feeling that in terms of like work I've done, not 0:11:56.480 --> 0:12:02.200 maybe being received or recognized, And okay, so it's on 0:12:02.240 --> 0:12:05.360 God's time. You still got to do it. You still 0:12:05.360 --> 0:12:07.760 got to be the good person even if no one notices. 0:12:07.840 --> 0:12:09.520 You still got to do the work. Even if no 0:12:09.559 --> 0:12:12.920 one notices whatever your work is, you still got to 0:12:12.960 --> 0:12:14.480 show up as who you say. 0:12:14.320 --> 0:12:16.040 You are even if no one notices. 0:12:16.280 --> 0:12:21.040 And usually what I find is the shifting is you 0:12:21.080 --> 0:12:27.200 create the boundaries up against the people, the situations, the 0:12:27.200 --> 0:12:30.920 circumstances in your life where you are feeling small, and 0:12:30.960 --> 0:12:34.720 you open yourself to the possibility and potential of being 0:12:34.760 --> 0:12:38.920 in new environments and you do the regulating work necessary 0:12:38.960 --> 0:12:42.280 to exist in those environments, and then you feel more 0:12:42.320 --> 0:12:45.240 equally yoked and you can see another and they can 0:12:45.280 --> 0:12:48.640 see you, and there's a resonance, and so you feel 0:12:48.720 --> 0:12:51.720 a little more full, you feel a little more understood. 0:12:52.760 --> 0:13:00.120 But being understood, feeling seen, being validated, it really is 0:13:00.120 --> 0:13:06.400 is always inside work. There is no way to cheat that. 0:13:07.040 --> 0:13:09.640 There is no one person to give that to you 0:13:09.720 --> 0:13:12.600 to make it all make sense. And so I don't 0:13:12.600 --> 0:13:14.319 know why I just felt led to go into. 0:13:14.160 --> 0:13:21.439 That whole little spiel, But Okay, it's. 0:13:21.280 --> 0:13:23.160 Just something that I'm seeing around and I want us 0:13:23.160 --> 0:13:26.440 to collectively watch that and ask questions about what the 0:13:26.480 --> 0:13:28.880 feeling really is and how we can meet that need. 0:13:28.960 --> 0:13:31.280 Because who do you think is looking? 0:13:31.679 --> 0:13:31.800 Like? 0:13:31.880 --> 0:13:33.320 Who is looking? 0:13:33.800 --> 0:13:35.640 And what are these people going to do to you? 0:13:35.280 --> 0:13:37.400 Just like what are you doing for the people that 0:13:37.440 --> 0:13:39.840 you're looking at? What do you think that means? Like, 0:13:40.800 --> 0:13:46.479 it's crazy, who's looking? Nobody is looking, You're looking. 0:13:47.920 --> 0:13:49.160 I'm just seeing. 0:13:50.679 --> 0:13:54.559 Most especially, I'm seeing so many people that most would 0:13:54.600 --> 0:14:01.520 consider as being seen or having been seen, that are 0:14:01.600 --> 0:14:04.360 saying that, and that are operating from that place, and 0:14:04.400 --> 0:14:08.400 that is a place of lack. Who is it that 0:14:08.520 --> 0:14:11.400 is worthy enough to bestow this upon you to make you. 0:14:11.360 --> 0:14:12.840 Feel good about it? 0:14:12.840 --> 0:14:16.320 It's important to ask that question, and why would you 0:14:16.360 --> 0:14:20.360 outsource the entirety of your power and potential into that 0:14:20.680 --> 0:14:24.240 person to validate who and what you are? And what 0:14:24.280 --> 0:14:26.760 do you even know about them? 0:14:27.080 --> 0:14:29.640 Yeah? All right, I went there? Who knows? 0:14:29.880 --> 0:14:33.040 So back to Lion's the gate working with this energy, 0:14:33.040 --> 0:14:34.960 and that might be something you want to surrender in 0:14:35.000 --> 0:14:39.320 this astrology, this is a period of time that many 0:14:39.320 --> 0:14:45.000 people recognize as an opportunity for reflection, for courage, for intention, 0:14:45.840 --> 0:14:49.480 and definitely for personal alignment. So, whether you approach it 0:14:49.520 --> 0:14:53.640 from a spiritualist, symbolic or just simply a reflective perspective, 0:14:54.200 --> 0:14:56.640 I believe that moments like this can really serve as 0:14:56.760 --> 0:15:01.600 powerful invitations to pause, to edit, to evaluate where we are, 0:15:02.160 --> 0:15:07.200 and to consciously choose or recommit to where we are headed. 0:15:08.200 --> 0:15:11.480 So today I want to share a few reflections. First 0:15:11.560 --> 0:15:14.520 that I had it with my time at Shaw Wellness 0:15:14.680 --> 0:15:18.400 and explore what the Lions Skate Portal represents and offer 0:15:18.440 --> 0:15:20.720 a few practices to help you move through this season 0:15:20.920 --> 0:15:33.320 with just a little more clarity and intention. Okay, so 0:15:33.440 --> 0:15:35.280 I want to talk about my time at Shaw Wellness. 0:15:35.320 --> 0:15:37.800 I'm going to do an Instagram post to and put 0:15:37.880 --> 0:15:40.040 a lot of the photos I took on my substack. 0:15:40.520 --> 0:15:41.560 It was really cool. 0:15:42.160 --> 0:15:46.600 One of my girlfriends, really special, lady Lauren Kleinman, she 0:15:47.280 --> 0:15:51.040 went and she knows that I am always kind of 0:15:51.120 --> 0:15:55.360 working on my physical health, and so she told me 0:15:55.400 --> 0:15:58.280 about her experience and everything that she did, and she 0:15:58.400 --> 0:16:01.680 offered to connect me with them. So full disclosure, I 0:16:01.720 --> 0:16:04.640 was invited on this trip for free and had the 0:16:04.720 --> 0:16:09.080 chance to experience it that way, outside of transportation, and 0:16:09.160 --> 0:16:11.880 so I'm very grateful for the opportunity and i want 0:16:11.920 --> 0:16:13.600 to share it with you in case you're able to 0:16:13.640 --> 0:16:16.840 go or recreate it somehow for yourself where you are. 0:16:17.600 --> 0:16:21.880 So Shaw Wellness it's located in the Caribbean coast of Cancun, Mexico. 0:16:21.920 --> 0:16:23.440 They also have a location. 0:16:23.320 --> 0:16:27.080 In Spain, and it's one of the world's leading wellness 0:16:27.080 --> 0:16:30.440 and longevity clinics. So some of the things that they 0:16:30.480 --> 0:16:34.840 do there is. They integrate Western medicine, functional and preventive medicine, nutrition, 0:16:35.200 --> 0:16:42.400 natural therapies, movement, sleep optimization, emotional well being, stress management, mindfulness, 0:16:42.440 --> 0:16:46.800 and meditation, and the real focus is on creating sustainable health, 0:16:46.920 --> 0:16:52.120 not just treating illness and symptoms. And so going into 0:16:52.160 --> 0:16:55.680 that experience was really amazing for me as someone especially 0:16:55.720 --> 0:16:58.680 that is already very locked in. A lot of the 0:16:58.720 --> 0:17:03.480 treatment were things that I've discovered over my journey, some 0:17:03.560 --> 0:17:06.160 of the things I implement. But then I also got 0:17:06.160 --> 0:17:08.680 to do things with my body that I've never done before. 0:17:08.800 --> 0:17:09.640 So I did like. 0:17:10.200 --> 0:17:15.320 The VO two max testing. I did this other incredible 0:17:15.359 --> 0:17:19.160 experience called Icarus, where you're in this machine and. 0:17:19.080 --> 0:17:20.600 You have this VR setup. 0:17:20.680 --> 0:17:22.320 All the pictures are going to be in my substack 0:17:22.359 --> 0:17:24.959 in the videos. It was a lot and you're working 0:17:25.000 --> 0:17:29.480 with the strength of your body. I met with an 0:17:29.480 --> 0:17:35.119 amazing osteopath from France, which I'm so excited about finding 0:17:35.560 --> 0:17:39.840 that modality and trying to find it now that I'm 0:17:39.840 --> 0:17:46.439 back in La So incredibly eye opening for me in 0:17:46.520 --> 0:17:49.480 so many ways. I did body scanned, where we really 0:17:49.520 --> 0:17:54.080 got to see in a very deep way my musculature 0:17:54.280 --> 0:17:57.080 and my fasha I do a lot of fascia work 0:17:57.080 --> 0:18:00.800 on myself as someone with chronic pain. I have hypermobile disorder, 0:18:00.960 --> 0:18:05.320 so that does so many things to the body and fibromyalgia, 0:18:05.440 --> 0:18:09.359 so I'm always working with pain that some of it 0:18:09.440 --> 0:18:12.960 is very triggered by the mind, So finding ways to 0:18:13.000 --> 0:18:15.399 do the physical work, but then also finding the ways 0:18:15.440 --> 0:18:18.919 to feel safe enough in your body that your muscles 0:18:19.000 --> 0:18:23.919 can release and reorganize in a healthy way. And so 0:18:23.960 --> 0:18:26.159 I was able to go so much deeper on that 0:18:26.240 --> 0:18:29.920 journey there having one on one time with my doctor there, 0:18:30.200 --> 0:18:36.639 having I did an amazing consultation, uh consultation and advisory 0:18:36.680 --> 0:18:43.840 session with a anti inflammatory nutritionist. That's a journey that 0:18:43.880 --> 0:18:47.600 I'm about to embark on more fully. 0:18:48.200 --> 0:18:49.480 It's really necessary. 0:18:49.600 --> 0:18:52.240 I'm finding that, you know, no matter what else I do, 0:18:52.440 --> 0:18:55.960 no matter what potential meds or supplements that I take, 0:18:56.600 --> 0:18:59.080 it really comes down to the fact that my body 0:18:59.400 --> 0:19:03.399 has to eat very clean to feel healthy, to not 0:19:03.520 --> 0:19:06.320 break down. And so I think for the last few years, 0:19:06.320 --> 0:19:10.199 I've been retraining my taste to eat for function and 0:19:10.240 --> 0:19:13.560 not eat for taste and flavor. And as a foodie 0:19:14.000 --> 0:19:19.040 that used to have a food blog, that's crazy, but 0:19:19.400 --> 0:19:21.600 I've been working on it and also praying about it 0:19:21.640 --> 0:19:25.240 and journaling about it, and I've reached that point, and 0:19:25.320 --> 0:19:28.520 so I'm excited to be on this new journey where 0:19:29.720 --> 0:19:35.680 I'm able to eat far more intentionally and really distance 0:19:35.800 --> 0:19:40.399 myself from foods that just cause me pain ultimately that 0:19:41.080 --> 0:19:43.719 you know, have to spend you know, that bite of this, 0:19:44.160 --> 0:19:48.159 and then it takes twelve hours for you know, you 0:19:48.240 --> 0:19:49.879 not to have pain or for you to feel like 0:19:49.920 --> 0:19:50.720 yourself again. 0:19:51.320 --> 0:19:52.520 I think I'm at a place where. 0:19:52.320 --> 0:19:58.520 I'm just realizing, thank God, that I can release any 0:19:58.560 --> 0:20:04.359 addictions to those food oods and give myself what I 0:20:04.440 --> 0:20:07.960 need and what I deserve. So it was very amazing 0:20:08.040 --> 0:20:12.200 to get that extra support. I also had this opportunity 0:20:12.240 --> 0:20:20.000 to have a really amazing biofeedback session and acupuncture session 0:20:20.680 --> 0:20:22.560 in a way that I'd never done before. And I'm 0:20:22.600 --> 0:20:27.639 someone that gets acupuncture, I mean so much like, I 0:20:27.720 --> 0:20:29.919 just believe in it. I believe in the power of 0:20:30.440 --> 0:20:34.880 traditional Chinese medicine and acupuncture, been doing it for probably 0:20:34.920 --> 0:20:39.399 twenty years and having these sessions that I just had 0:20:39.560 --> 0:20:45.119 and realizing through these like bio energy feedback machines, some 0:20:45.280 --> 0:20:48.480 areas that would be better to concentrate on shout out 0:20:48.480 --> 0:20:52.960 to Miguel. It was just, yeah, it changed me. It 0:20:53.040 --> 0:20:58.600 really changed my configuration. So I needed that immersion and 0:20:58.640 --> 0:21:01.239 I think it is something that I can recreate at 0:21:01.240 --> 0:21:03.640 home for myself when I have this space. But it 0:21:03.680 --> 0:21:06.040 is going to require a lot of intention, and I 0:21:06.040 --> 0:21:11.520 think we all should consider discovering when and if we 0:21:11.600 --> 0:21:13.560 have the time, and I know in this season that 0:21:13.720 --> 0:21:15.760 really may not be the case for some of us, 0:21:15.840 --> 0:21:19.720 but if and when we have the time. I'm someone 0:21:19.760 --> 0:21:25.000 that has experienced burnout, like true burnout several times in 0:21:25.000 --> 0:21:27.359 my life, to where I've had to be hospitalized, to 0:21:27.400 --> 0:21:32.600 where I developed in I twitch, to where I developed 0:21:32.920 --> 0:21:37.840 honestly in autoimmune condition. So I take burnout very seriously 0:21:37.920 --> 0:21:43.240 and in my non podcasting work that I do one 0:21:43.280 --> 0:21:47.960 on one in boarder rooms with leaders, it's so deep 0:21:51.400 --> 0:21:55.359 and it's so important to catch burnout before it really 0:21:55.400 --> 0:21:59.080 settles into your body, because it can take one to 0:21:59.200 --> 0:22:04.720 two years of really dedicated time to heal before you 0:22:04.800 --> 0:22:08.199 can get back to who you were, and that's just 0:22:08.240 --> 0:22:10.960 too much time to take off. It's too much time 0:22:11.119 --> 0:22:15.439 to suffer. And so, you know something I had to 0:22:15.440 --> 0:22:19.600 be honest with myself about as a hyper independent person 0:22:19.920 --> 0:22:22.840 that has a Pluto complex and has been used to 0:22:22.920 --> 0:22:26.600 doing all the things and powering through and you know, 0:22:26.720 --> 0:22:29.639 single mom life, woman life like we know, we know 0:22:29.800 --> 0:22:33.920 what it's like to just keep going, even with our practices, 0:22:34.160 --> 0:22:36.240 even with my daily meditation. 0:22:36.600 --> 0:22:39.440 And going to Shaw wellness. This past week. 0:22:40.640 --> 0:22:45.159 Was even more integrative and eye opening at the perfect time. 0:22:46.080 --> 0:22:52.280 I've been navigating a personal challenge and a personal betrayal. 0:22:53.440 --> 0:22:54.919 And a personal. 0:22:55.280 --> 0:22:59.639 Hardship for the last five and a half months privately, 0:23:00.160 --> 0:23:03.480 and I realized when I got to Shah that I've 0:23:03.520 --> 0:23:08.520 been in fight or flight for over five months and 0:23:08.600 --> 0:23:11.159 there just wasn't this space to really do anything about that. 0:23:11.400 --> 0:23:14.040 As is the case sometimes, right, I still was working, 0:23:14.080 --> 0:23:17.560 I was still traveling. I was still having mind blowing experiences, 0:23:18.359 --> 0:23:22.040 you know, like my benevolent Queen Oprah being able to 0:23:22.200 --> 0:23:25.320 interview her in can, like being a mom. 0:23:25.480 --> 0:23:26.320 It's summer like. 0:23:26.359 --> 0:23:28.679 Still, all of those things are happening, and some of 0:23:28.680 --> 0:23:33.640 them are incredibly special, and I've been navigating like one 0:23:33.680 --> 0:23:37.239 of the hardest things I've ever been through that is 0:23:37.680 --> 0:23:39.959 likely going to haunt me for a very long time, 0:23:40.600 --> 0:23:41.479 and I'm still in it. 0:23:41.560 --> 0:23:44.320 I'm still not at the end road of it. 0:23:45.320 --> 0:23:48.440 So my work this season has been, you know, how 0:23:48.440 --> 0:23:50.200 do I hold all of it at the same time 0:23:51.280 --> 0:23:53.080 when there is not a choice. It's not one of 0:23:53.080 --> 0:23:56.959 those situations that we'll slow down, got it, I can't. 0:23:57.200 --> 0:23:59.760 So I'm looking to slow down in the tiniest of 0:23:59.800 --> 0:24:02.679 moments that that's possible, like when I'm on an airplane 0:24:02.720 --> 0:24:06.159 and not watching a movie and instead just breathing and 0:24:06.200 --> 0:24:09.680 looking out the window, or you know, getting in a few. 0:24:09.520 --> 0:24:11.000 Extra epsom salt baths. 0:24:11.080 --> 0:24:14.560 But this was my opportunity to reregulate, and it was 0:24:14.720 --> 0:24:17.920 powerful to see that up close and to be able 0:24:17.960 --> 0:24:20.560 to admit to myself that I have been suffering in 0:24:20.600 --> 0:24:26.040 some ways mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually, you know, these 0:24:26.119 --> 0:24:29.800 last few months, and that I needed that much space. 0:24:29.960 --> 0:24:33.400 I was able to have four days there, three full 0:24:33.520 --> 0:24:38.080 days of working with treatment and the doctors and finding 0:24:38.119 --> 0:24:42.560 opportunities to just sit, rest and restore, and in real 0:24:42.720 --> 0:24:45.520 time watching my body come down for fight or flight 0:24:45.800 --> 0:24:49.280 was just such a powerful reminder as a leader and 0:24:49.320 --> 0:24:52.600 as a facilitator of what it really feels like in 0:24:52.640 --> 0:24:55.080 the body and how to be with it, how to 0:24:55.119 --> 0:24:58.040 move past it and then how to continue to tend 0:24:58.080 --> 0:25:02.320 to it once you're out of it. So yeah, I 0:25:02.720 --> 0:25:06.840 went in actually so much more hypervigilant than I imagined, 0:25:06.960 --> 0:25:10.000