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Speaker 1: My wife broke into my computer. If she can't trust me,

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Speaker 1: I can't continue to grow account here. Just to be safe,

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Speaker 1: I thirty four mail checked my browsing history and saw

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Speaker 1: multiple instances or Facebook messages listed. They were all within

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Speaker 1: five minutes and during the time period I was putting

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Speaker 1: one of the kiddos down.

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Speaker 2: For a NAPP.

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Speaker 1: When I came out from the kid's room, my wife,

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Speaker 1: thirty four female was on my PC playing a game?

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Speaker 1: Or was she? Is she really playing a game?

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Speaker 2: She's playing kid picks O.

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Speaker 1: Memories. Wow, this isn't unusual, even though I mainly use it.

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Speaker 1: She usually will play games on her console, but we'll

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Speaker 1: have some that she can only play on my PC.

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Speaker 1: By the way, this comes from two b throwaway on

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Speaker 1: the Arslash Okay Storytime supper. In it, she left to

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Speaker 1: let me get on it and make lunch. This is

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Speaker 1: when I took a look and saw the history. From

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Speaker 1: what I could tell, she looks at the chats of

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Speaker 1: me with my brother, gaming group, one guy from the

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Speaker 1: gaming group, a grandma, a travel agent, and an ex

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Speaker 1: coworker from my old job.

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Speaker 2: A lot of people.

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Speaker 1: So these are all the chats that she was looking

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Speaker 1: at while she was gaming. The active chats are really

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Speaker 1: only the guide group gaming chats. All the remaining chats

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Speaker 1: are very inactive and or old messages. Her grandma was

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Speaker 1: just wishing her was just her wishing a happy birthday

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Speaker 1: to me. Travel agent was just checking in after a

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Speaker 1: trip earlier. My brother and I haven't used Facebook messages

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Speaker 1: for years. My ex coworker female had just a few

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Speaker 1: messages back in twenty fifteen, and maybe like three memes

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Speaker 1: we've sent since. This is someone I do keep up with,

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Speaker 1: but we maybe text two to three times a month.

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Speaker 1: In looking through all these chats, I'm not sure what

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Speaker 1: she's looking for in the active chats. I'm usually just

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Speaker 1: telling her what those conversations are. Anyway, Throughout similar Reddit stories,

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Speaker 1: I've been a big believer of the ends justify the means.

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Speaker 1: Lots of people have caught their partners in discretions by snooping,

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Speaker 1: especially when they already have some evidence. However, you risk

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Speaker 1: hurting your partner by breaking their privacy, which is my rule.

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Speaker 1: This is one of my rules that I said hurts

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Speaker 1: the relationship. If you're going to snoop through someone's phone, yes, yeah,

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Speaker 1: just I mean, either your relationship is over because they're cheating,

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Speaker 1: or you're you're destroying your relationship by breaking their trust

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Speaker 1: by going through their phone. Yes, but you're ruining the

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Speaker 1: relationship either way.

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Speaker 2: You start playing video over and over and over, and

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Speaker 2: then you're going.

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Speaker 1: Down that whole rabbit oh when there's nothing there. We've

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Speaker 1: never explicitly had rules of not going through each other's

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Speaker 1: phones last messages, but it's never been a general practice.

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Speaker 3: We do.

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Speaker 1: I do not go through her stuff. I think there

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Speaker 1: is also just kind of like an assumption of respect

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Speaker 1: and boundaries. It's not like I would I wouldn't just

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Speaker 1: snoop through someone's phone.

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Speaker 2: That's very The only thing.

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Speaker 1: That you're allowed to do on someone's phone is take

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Speaker 1: a bunch of elies and then they go through their

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Speaker 1: hameer roll and they're like, oh my god, what games

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Speaker 1: you got? Yeah, yeah, that's the only thing you can do.

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Speaker 1: That's just the thing. There's nothing to be found. I'm

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Speaker 1: not some serial cheater or keeping some huge secret from her.

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Speaker 1: No marriage is perfect. We have issues here and there,

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Speaker 1: but nothing. I thought that she should make her think

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Speaker 1: I'm hiding something. Then my paranoia kicks in and I

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Speaker 1: think is she projecting yeh, since finding this, I've definitely

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Speaker 1: been noticeably upset. I've tried to keep away and do

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Speaker 1: chores and such. I try to keep a happy face,

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Speaker 1: but I'm someone whose face does not hide these feelings. Well,

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Speaker 1: am I overreacting and this? And is this benign enough

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Speaker 1: for me to just get over it and move on?

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Speaker 1: Is this a breach of my privacy? And do I

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Speaker 1: need to call her out on it? I think the

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Speaker 1: fact that it made you uncomfortable it means it's a

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Speaker 1: breach of your privacy to preach of your trust. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: and breach of your trust, and I definitely think you

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Speaker 1: should call her out on it. It doesn't mean that

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Speaker 1: you have to end the relationship.

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Speaker 2: No, no, no, no, but something And.

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Speaker 1: Also, do you know why did you feel the need?

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Speaker 1: Do you not trust me? Is there something I'm doing

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Speaker 1: to make you worried?

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Speaker 2: This is?

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Speaker 1: Are you doing something? This is definitely comes a little snoopy,

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Speaker 1: little Charlie Brown. Over here. There is an edit to

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Speaker 1: answer a few things that keep coming up. No, I

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Speaker 1: never cheated. I don't think I ever could because I

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Speaker 1: don't have the mental fortitude too. I went into my

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Speaker 1: browser history to pull up a guide for a game

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Speaker 1: I was on the night before that I was about

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Speaker 1: to play. While we don't have explicit boundaries of looking

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Speaker 1: at each other's phone slash history, et cetera, it has

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Speaker 1: been somewhat implied that we do not do this, but

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Speaker 1: no boundary has been officially set. We have no big

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Speaker 1: recent life changes. This is not something to my knowledge,

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Speaker 1: she has done before. I do not leave Facebook open

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Speaker 1: on my PC. I am certain that she would have

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Speaker 1: had to open the web page and click through those

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Speaker 1: multiple chats. Again, there reason no she may have looked

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Speaker 1: at them.

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Speaker 3: She did.

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Speaker 1: I am just unsure of the motive. Using the term

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Speaker 1: call out may have been too extreme. I meant it

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Speaker 1: morris to bring it up to her, not necessarily attacker,

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Speaker 1: which I think is yeah good. Initially, I may have

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Speaker 1: meant it to be a bit more hostile, but if

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Speaker 1: I do bring it up to her, I would be

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Speaker 1: in an open and non accusatory way. Thank you to

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Speaker 1: everyone who presented a nuanced and thoughtful comment. I really

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Speaker 1: am taking them to heart about what to do for

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Speaker 1: those saying the relationship is done or to separate.

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Speaker 2: I think this is way too extreme.

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Speaker 1: Again, I'm still not sure of the motive, but she

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Speaker 1: went into what was mostly known. Conversations to her part

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Speaker 1: of my daily chats with her are my conversations throughout

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Speaker 1: the day. Conversely, those saying that it's not a big

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Speaker 1: deal or I drove her to do this somehow, I

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Speaker 1: don't know how you reach those conclusions. Not everyone that

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Speaker 1: goes digging in messages snooping can be justified. We're defending

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Speaker 1: this as akin to victim blaming, though I'm not at

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Speaker 1: this point trying to portray myself as a victim. Wait, oh,

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Speaker 1: pe was victim blaming.

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Speaker 4: The people were commenting that, uh, weird. That doesn't make

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Speaker 4: it okay, you're victim blaming yet believe who's the victim here?

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Speaker 2: Like, wait, I'm being the victim.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm the victim. Wait a minute. For those saying

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Speaker 1: it's no big deal, I think sneaking like this is

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Speaker 1: non zero of a deal. By the way, you can

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Speaker 1: join us live on YouTube every week to have three

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Speaker 1: pmpst just tap her profile.

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Speaker 3: Tap it, and to finish off.

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Speaker 1: So that leads me to this, I feel like I'm

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Speaker 1: going to put myself in the middle of multiple suggestions.

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Speaker 1: I can control my reaction to it. We are married

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Speaker 1: and share a whole life and family I have nothing

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Speaker 1: to hide, shouldn't be so upset about this to the

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Speaker 1: level I currently am. However, if she brings up that

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Speaker 1: she looked at these conversations, we can have a calm,

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Speaker 1: cool discussion about it. If she never brings it up,

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Speaker 1: I won't either, knowing that in the end it's not

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Speaker 1: a deal breaker, but it will make me slightly more

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Speaker 1: wary and vigilant to not just her actions, but the

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Speaker 1: health of a relationship. I don't agree with this. Working

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Speaker 1: on a relationship is something I've been putting a lot

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Speaker 1: of effort into lately and plan on keeping that going.

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Speaker 1: With that, I will not be looking through her phone

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Speaker 1: because it would jeopardize that as well as being the

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Speaker 1: same thing she was doing with me.

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Speaker 2: And I ain't no hypocrite.

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Speaker 1: I don't like that he was saying that he's not

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Speaker 1: going to talk to her about it.

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Speaker 3: I think you should absolutely have a conversation.

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Speaker 2: With You're going to talk to her about it. If

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Speaker 2: it's something that.

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Speaker 1: You're upset about, it's just gonna like. Keeping it inside

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Speaker 1: is not going.

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Speaker 2: To help your relationship. Don't bury it down and be like,

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Speaker 2: in the future.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, you're just gonna resent her.

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Speaker 2: Just talk to her and be like, what are you doing, Snoopy?

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Speaker 1: Hey, hey, Snoopy, there looking through my text you eight

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Speaker 1: years ago? You scamp?

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Speaker 2: Oh you you could be nice about it. Hey, Champ

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Speaker 2: heard you were going through my phone?

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Speaker 3: Oh oh, scout.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, Kimberly find says they're trying to imp he's responsible

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Speaker 1: for managing her trust issues, even if they were planted

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Speaker 1: by someone else.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: No, but he does need to have a conversation with her,

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Speaker 1: and that is the end of that story.

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Speaker 4: I hit my boyfriend's anime body pillow while my parents

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Speaker 4: were visiting. Now he thinks I'm ashamed of him. My

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Speaker 4: boyfriend male thirty two and I female, twenty seven have

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Speaker 4: been together for a year. He's only met my parents

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Speaker 4: once over the holidays last year because they lived pretty

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Speaker 4: far away. They've been visiting this past week, and since

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Speaker 4: he and I just moved in together, they were excited

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Speaker 4: to see our new place and get to know my

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Speaker 4: boyfriend a little more. By the way, this comes from

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Speaker 4: user right to Fly one two three on the r

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Speaker 4: slash Best of Redditor Updates subreddit. So we have an

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Speaker 4: extra bedroom and this has become my boyfriend's gaming room.

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Speaker 4: For the most part. We agreed when guests come over,

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Speaker 4: it would be a second bedroom. He really likes video

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Speaker 4: games in anime in particular, so he has a lot

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Speaker 4: of toys and artwork that he's collected over the years

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Speaker 4: from different games and such. One thing he has is

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Speaker 4: the anime body pillow that features a sexy anime girl

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Speaker 4: on it. He also has a mouse pad for his

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Speaker 4: gaming computer that resembles a busty anime girl. This guy's

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Speaker 4: got taste.

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Speaker 3: This guy's guy.

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Speaker 4: Before my parents come over, I asked him to take

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Speaker 4: down his toys and stuff so they could be comfortable.

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Speaker 4: I was upset to see that he left the body

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Speaker 4: pillow and the mouse pad in place.

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Speaker 1: Immediately, I feel like if he is in the.

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Speaker 2: Right here, Oh, he's definitely in the right.

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Speaker 1: But I mean, like, why would you I would not

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Speaker 1: feel super comfortable about my parents coming over. Yeah, seeing that,

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Speaker 1: like that's like if you have like you know, like

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Speaker 1: sometimes you can have like artwork, that's like.

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Speaker 2: Take it down.

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Speaker 4: You gotta take down the fine china sometimes and just

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Speaker 4: like put it away to hide it.

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Speaker 3: We know you love your busty anime girls, but not

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Speaker 3: saying you can't have it forever.

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Speaker 4: The fact that she's like, yeah, you can have it,

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Speaker 4: it's your stuff, comfortables, it's chill, but put it away

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Speaker 4: for the parents. I don't feel really comfortable with either item,

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Speaker 4: but he's really into anime, so I've always kind of

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Speaker 4: left it alone. But I absolutely didn't think it was

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Speaker 4: appropriate to leave it in there when my parents would

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Speaker 4: be staying over. I took the cover off the buddy

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Speaker 4: pillow and put the pillow in the closet, and I

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Speaker 4: put the mousepad in a drawer in our room. When

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Speaker 4: my parents arrived and we showed them to their room,

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Speaker 4: my boyfriend noticed the missing pillow and mousepad later when

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Speaker 4: we were in bed. He brought it up to me

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Speaker 4: and asked why I hit them. I told him I

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Speaker 4: didn't think my parents would feel comfortable with those things

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Speaker 4: in the bedroom, and when they leave, we can put

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Speaker 4: them back. My boyfriend got really upset. He told me

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Speaker 4: that he feels like I'm ashamed of his interest in anime.

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Speaker 4: He said he spent his whole life feeling like people

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Speaker 4: think he's weird for being into anime, and he didn't

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Speaker 4: expect his own girlfriend to be just like everyone else.

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Speaker 3: Okay, dude, WHOA there is some Okay, get off.

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Speaker 2: Your anime has come on.

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Speaker 1: There's such a big difference between being into anime and

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Speaker 1: you know, having like musty girls in your room that

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Speaker 1: you insist on like her parents.

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Speaker 2: In the fact that your girlfriend is cool with that too.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, that's awesome, that's great.

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Speaker 1: You have to get rid of it.

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Speaker 4: She's like, it's not being ashamed, it's just like being

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Speaker 4: like presentable. You.

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Speaker 1: It's like you sometimes you have to wear suit to functions.

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Speaker 2: Yea, or no sandals or no flip flops exactly.

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Speaker 1: Like sometimes you have religious parents, you know, you might

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Speaker 1: be like truly, like she said, her parents wouldn't be

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Speaker 1: comfortable with it.

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Speaker 2: This is just kind of immature.

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Speaker 1: It's really immature. Come on.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 4: The next day, I noticed him taking some of his

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Speaker 4: manga books off our bookshelf and putting them into a box.

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Speaker 1: Now he's throwing a fed Oh my.

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Speaker 2: God, he's such a little boy.

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Speaker 1: I can't have my mom that you ain't my anime.

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Speaker 4: I asked him why, and he said something like putting

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Speaker 4: them away so you don't have to look at them anymore.

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Speaker 2: I feel really bad.

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Speaker 4: I feel like I hurt him, but I just really

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Speaker 4: didn't think my parents would feel comfortable sleeping in a

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Speaker 4: room with those items. But now he's acting so distant

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Speaker 4: and cold, and he's not really engaging with my parents

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Speaker 4: at all. They keep asking me what's wrong, and I

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Speaker 4: don't know what to say. Am I the a hole?

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Speaker 1: No? No, your boyfriend's throwing a little baby fit and

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Speaker 1: he's being a little winer and I hate him.

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Speaker 2: This guy. This guy doesn't suck. He's just a little brat.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, he's a brad.

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Speaker 2: The fact that he's like, oh I'm victimized, Yeah, oh

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Speaker 2: I would have because.

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Speaker 3: You're you're you're a shame.

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Speaker 1: You're a shamed of me for being an anime boy.

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Speaker 4: It's like, dude, you have all your anime posters, your

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Speaker 4: manga scrolls, You're allowed to have them up. You have,

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Speaker 4: you could have you like your little like Samurai swords up.

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Speaker 4: It's just the it's inappropriate thing.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 4: Top comment by talking mice. There's a huge difference between

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Speaker 4: anime slash video game decorations aualized anime content. Literally, a

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00:12:52,360 --> 00:12:55,199
Speaker 4: busty mouse pad and a sexy body pillow wouldn't most

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Speaker 4: definitely make anyone feel uncomfortable. I get that it's his

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00:12:58,120 --> 00:13:01,080
Speaker 4: space too, but I think a small amount of compromise

281
00:13:01,120 --> 00:13:03,560
Speaker 4: for a limited time isn't a problem at all, exactly.

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Speaker 4: He might see it as you being embarrassed of his interests,

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Speaker 4: but the reality is most people aren't comfortable with sex

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Speaker 4: decre It's not about anime at all, exactly, not the ahole.

285
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Speaker 4: He really needs to have more consideration for others.

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Speaker 3: Yep.

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Speaker 2: Update.

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Speaker 4: I read through the comments and it kind of validated

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Speaker 4: something I already was feeling. Well the choruside. The way

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Speaker 4: he acted the next day when he was putting his

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00:13:28,960 --> 00:13:32,320
Speaker 4: the books away really bothered me. I ended up explaining

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00:13:32,320 --> 00:13:35,360
Speaker 4: the situation to my parents and they weren't exactly thrilled

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Speaker 4: by his reaction either.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, he's being really powdy. He doesn't want to talk to.

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Speaker 1: I wonder, Oh is this the This isn't this can't

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Speaker 1: be the first time they.

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Speaker 2: Met They met They met him one time, Okay.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, this is the second time.

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Speaker 2: You're meaning your parents.

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Speaker 4: You want to make a good impression, a pudy impression,

302
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Speaker 4: being distant.

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Speaker 1: Princess tis foot or a massagyny.

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Speaker 4: Hmm.

305
00:14:00,000 --> 00:14:03,000
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, I can't get my way, so no.

306
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Speaker 1: Woo, you're trying to take my wife who away?

307
00:14:09,480 --> 00:14:11,840
Speaker 4: I got the feeling after this trip that they don't

308
00:14:11,840 --> 00:14:15,640
Speaker 4: really approve of him. Yeah, shocking, which is neither here

309
00:14:15,720 --> 00:14:17,960
Speaker 4: nor there. I'm twenty seven and I'm old enough to

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Speaker 4: make my own choices. But above everything else, my parents

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00:14:21,400 --> 00:14:23,320
Speaker 4: mean a lot to me. I never get to see them.

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00:14:23,480 --> 00:14:25,720
Speaker 4: It was important to me that my boyfriend would be

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Speaker 4: present and treat them well while they were here. After

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00:14:29,000 --> 00:14:32,680
Speaker 4: they left, I dropped him to the airport. Boyfriend refused

315
00:14:32,720 --> 00:14:37,520
Speaker 4: to come, being so petulant as being a real man child.

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Speaker 4: He's thirty something too, by the way.

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Speaker 1: Ah, also, what are the are the wife wu? Hands like?

318
00:14:43,240 --> 00:14:45,280
Speaker 2: Like the wife wu like?

319
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Speaker 1: It's like, Oh, that's scary, I guess.

320
00:14:51,160 --> 00:14:53,080
Speaker 4: I came back from the airport and found a couple

321
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Speaker 4: of trash bags outside the door.

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Speaker 1: Oh my god, leaving.

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Speaker 4: It turns out that once I left, my my boyfriend

324
00:15:00,600 --> 00:15:03,440
Speaker 4: started throwing all of his anime things into these bags.

325
00:15:03,600 --> 00:15:05,920
Speaker 4: I asked why, and he said something along the same

326
00:15:05,960 --> 00:15:10,240
Speaker 4: lines as before that clearly his interests weren't welcome in

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00:15:10,480 --> 00:15:13,440
Speaker 4: my home, and he'd keep them in his car until

328
00:15:13,440 --> 00:15:16,520
Speaker 4: he figure out what to do with them. I kind

329
00:15:16,560 --> 00:15:19,360
Speaker 4: of snapped. I'd been keeping it together all week for

330
00:15:19,480 --> 00:15:21,680
Speaker 4: my parents, but I had enough. At this point, I

331
00:15:21,760 --> 00:15:23,640
Speaker 4: told him I never asked him to get rid of

332
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Speaker 4: his anime stuff, just that it wasn't appropriate for my

333
00:15:26,200 --> 00:15:28,720
Speaker 4: parents while they were staying with us. I told him

334
00:15:28,800 --> 00:15:31,760
Speaker 4: this reaction is unfair and he's being manipulative. I told

335
00:15:31,840 --> 00:15:33,680
Speaker 4: him that this week was supposed to be about him

336
00:15:33,720 --> 00:15:36,160
Speaker 4: getting to know my parents, but he was too fixated

337
00:15:36,160 --> 00:15:38,720
Speaker 4: on this anime issue to even spend any real time

338
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Speaker 4: with them.

339
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Speaker 2: Oh man.

340
00:15:40,680 --> 00:15:44,480
Speaker 4: He then called me manipulative for making him believe that

341
00:15:44,640 --> 00:15:46,720
Speaker 4: I was cool with his love for anime for the

342
00:15:46,760 --> 00:15:50,720
Speaker 4: past year when I was clearly ashamed of it. Dude,

343
00:15:52,160 --> 00:15:53,920
Speaker 4: all right, go date your body pillow.

344
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Speaker 1: Literally, you already have your wife.

345
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Speaker 4: He also said he didn't want to be a part

346
00:15:57,960 --> 00:16:02,760
Speaker 4: of a family that doesn't appreciate anime. We went back

347
00:16:02,800 --> 00:16:04,680
Speaker 4: and forth for a while, and then I told him

348
00:16:04,760 --> 00:16:07,200
Speaker 4: we needed space. I wasn't really planning that, but it

349
00:16:07,240 --> 00:16:09,320
Speaker 4: came out and I felt like the right thing for me.

350
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Speaker 3: Wild well.

351
00:16:11,440 --> 00:16:15,120
Speaker 4: He then started crying a lot and apologizing and immediately

352
00:16:15,160 --> 00:16:17,480
Speaker 4: tried to take back what he said, but I was

353
00:16:17,560 --> 00:16:19,840
Speaker 4: just done at this point. He left eventually, and now

354
00:16:19,840 --> 00:16:23,000
Speaker 4: I'm here in this apartment alone. Well, in the mouse

355
00:16:23,080 --> 00:16:25,760
Speaker 4: pad and body pillow pole he left those.

356
00:16:26,000 --> 00:16:30,680
Speaker 1: Oh my god, this is so tom Petty exhausting.

357
00:16:31,800 --> 00:16:34,600
Speaker 4: Anyway, I don't really know if we're broken up officially

358
00:16:34,760 --> 00:16:37,920
Speaker 4: or what, but it seems to be heading that way. Yeah,

359
00:16:38,000 --> 00:16:40,680
Speaker 4: I'm just feeling awful, and I almost wish this all

360
00:16:40,680 --> 00:16:42,840
Speaker 4: happened before my parents visited, because I feel like it

361
00:16:42,880 --> 00:16:45,760
Speaker 4: tainted the whole trip. But yeah, thanks for the replies, guys,

362
00:16:45,840 --> 00:16:48,640
Speaker 4: and for helping me open my eyes a bit. Speaking

363
00:16:48,640 --> 00:16:51,840
Speaker 4: of opening your eyes, you can keep those eyes open

364
00:16:52,360 --> 00:16:56,760
Speaker 4: live on YouTube every weekdays just daft our profile.

365
00:16:56,920 --> 00:17:01,960
Speaker 1: Yes, Tsavo says Bro really is throwing a tantrum because

366
00:17:01,960 --> 00:17:05,200
Speaker 1: he couldn't display his soft core corn while company was over.

367
00:17:05,480 --> 00:17:10,840
Speaker 2: No, that this is ridiculous, really mind buggling. He's using

368
00:17:10,840 --> 00:17:12,600
Speaker 2: that you're ashamed of who I am.

369
00:17:12,640 --> 00:17:14,280
Speaker 3: Yeah, there's no, there's no shame.

370
00:17:14,480 --> 00:17:17,040
Speaker 1: No, it's just it's just a manner of like respect

371
00:17:17,040 --> 00:17:20,080
Speaker 1: and knowing your audience and stuff. And also his point

372
00:17:20,080 --> 00:17:21,439
Speaker 1: about like I don't want to be a part of

373
00:17:21,440 --> 00:17:23,200
Speaker 1: a family, doesn't like anime.

374
00:17:23,720 --> 00:17:25,640
Speaker 2: Your body pillow, he left the body pillow.

375
00:17:25,720 --> 00:17:28,680
Speaker 1: He left the body pillow. He didn't even care. And

376
00:17:29,240 --> 00:17:31,679
Speaker 1: also like I'm glad that she's out of this relationship.

377
00:17:31,760 --> 00:17:33,919
Speaker 4: Presumably we don't know if they're broken up, but is

378
00:17:33,960 --> 00:17:36,240
Speaker 4: this is something where he needs to really grow up?

379
00:17:36,359 --> 00:17:38,800
Speaker 2: Yeah, grow ridiculous, you need a reality.

380
00:17:38,600 --> 00:17:41,440
Speaker 1: Embarrassed her in front of her parents because.

381
00:17:41,200 --> 00:17:41,560
Speaker 3: He was.

382
00:17:43,040 --> 00:17:46,280
Speaker 2: Like, the op seemed like such a cool person.

383
00:17:46,440 --> 00:17:48,520
Speaker 1: Yeah. She was like sure, like you know, it's not

384
00:17:48,720 --> 00:17:51,040
Speaker 1: like my thing, but yeah, you're absolutely welcome to have it.

385
00:17:51,119 --> 00:17:52,479
Speaker 1: And then it's just like, oh, maybe we put these

386
00:17:52,480 --> 00:17:53,320
Speaker 1: away for a company, and he.

387
00:17:53,280 --> 00:17:56,880
Speaker 2: Was like, you're ashamed of who I am. I knew

388
00:17:56,960 --> 00:18:00,440
Speaker 2: it all alone, rising me why to me get out

389
00:18:00,440 --> 00:18:00,720
Speaker 2: of here?

390
00:18:01,480 --> 00:18:05,280
Speaker 1: There's the door. My girlfriend cheated on me after I

391
00:18:05,400 --> 00:18:08,880
Speaker 1: cheated on her, But she thinks we could work through it.

392
00:18:10,440 --> 00:18:12,639
Speaker 3: I love these titles today, the titles are killing it.

393
00:18:12,760 --> 00:18:14,280
Speaker 3: He thinks afre shiated it.

394
00:18:14,359 --> 00:18:15,760
Speaker 2: These are these are crazy.

395
00:18:15,920 --> 00:18:18,760
Speaker 1: What a funny, funny, funny, funny thing to do? What

396
00:18:18,840 --> 00:18:20,119
Speaker 1: a cheating going on? I don't know if they can

397
00:18:20,200 --> 00:18:23,159
Speaker 1: work through it. I have been dating my girlfriend for

398
00:18:23,200 --> 00:18:25,639
Speaker 1: about a year and a half. Towards the beginning of

399
00:18:25,680 --> 00:18:28,800
Speaker 1: our relationship, I cheated by having to sleep with another girl.

400
00:18:28,920 --> 00:18:31,680
Speaker 1: My girlfriend ended up finding out. However, it was during

401
00:18:31,680 --> 00:18:35,960
Speaker 1: a time when we were exclusive, not official.

402
00:18:35,560 --> 00:18:39,360
Speaker 2: So still cheating, still cheating, still still cheating. Congrats you cheated, But.

403
00:18:39,400 --> 00:18:42,520
Speaker 1: However exclusive or not, it was cheating, and I owned

404
00:18:42,600 --> 00:18:44,680
Speaker 1: up to it. It took her a while to move

405
00:18:44,720 --> 00:18:48,119
Speaker 1: past it, a long time. She originally broke up with

406
00:18:48,200 --> 00:18:50,760
Speaker 1: me well, but shortly after we talked it out and

407
00:18:50,800 --> 00:18:53,840
Speaker 1: continued forward with this. By the way, this comes from

408
00:18:53,880 --> 00:18:56,280
Speaker 1: deleted on the arsage. Am I the a hole? What

409
00:18:56,400 --> 00:19:00,680
Speaker 1: a be? The ahole public subreddit? So around that same time,

410
00:19:00,760 --> 00:19:04,240
Speaker 1: I've slept with another girl. I also took a very

411
00:19:04,280 --> 00:19:08,520
Speaker 1: explicit photo with another girl roughly around the same time,

412
00:19:08,920 --> 00:19:12,440
Speaker 1: one week within each other. Two girls, two separate girls.

413
00:19:12,480 --> 00:19:13,600
Speaker 1: You cheated on after you had.

414
00:19:13,520 --> 00:19:15,480
Speaker 2: This conversation with there tectically three seems like.

415
00:19:16,200 --> 00:19:18,600
Speaker 1: Months later, we're official now at this point things are

416
00:19:18,640 --> 00:19:21,600
Speaker 1: going great. Then she finds the photo and this again

417
00:19:22,000 --> 00:19:24,560
Speaker 1: was a major setback. Why did you keep the photo?

418
00:19:24,680 --> 00:19:25,520
Speaker 1: You dumb idiot?

419
00:19:25,800 --> 00:19:27,679
Speaker 2: This guy is you?

420
00:19:27,840 --> 00:19:29,160
Speaker 1: Stupid stupid man?

421
00:19:29,680 --> 00:19:30,240
Speaker 3: Wow?

422
00:19:30,800 --> 00:19:33,120
Speaker 1: Then fens photo, and this again was a major setback

423
00:19:33,119 --> 00:19:36,119
Speaker 1: and she chose to leave. However, shortly after we worked

424
00:19:36,119 --> 00:19:38,760
Speaker 1: it out and made it work. The two first cheating

425
00:19:38,760 --> 00:19:42,280
Speaker 1: incidents happened one to three weeks. However, there was a

426
00:19:42,320 --> 00:19:47,359
Speaker 1: third incident in that same time period where there was

427
00:19:47,400 --> 00:19:49,280
Speaker 1: a video of a girl dancing on me.

428
00:19:50,200 --> 00:19:50,879
Speaker 2: What are you doing?

429
00:19:51,760 --> 00:19:52,119
Speaker 1: Stop?

430
00:19:52,400 --> 00:19:55,520
Speaker 2: Stop stop, just stop stop?

431
00:19:56,880 --> 00:19:58,280
Speaker 3: You are the ables.

432
00:19:57,960 --> 00:20:02,119
Speaker 1: Stop mons After the second instant, she came across the

433
00:20:02,200 --> 00:20:05,359
Speaker 1: video and yet again this was another setback and she

434
00:20:05,520 --> 00:20:08,320
Speaker 1: ended stuff with me. However, shortly after we talked it

435
00:20:08,359 --> 00:20:11,800
Speaker 1: out and made it work again. You're you are one

436
00:20:11,840 --> 00:20:12,360
Speaker 1: hell of a docter.

437
00:20:12,480 --> 00:20:12,560
Speaker 3: You.

438
00:20:13,800 --> 00:20:16,400
Speaker 1: Yeah, there was a period those one to three weeks

439
00:20:16,400 --> 00:20:19,120
Speaker 1: where I didn't even know who I was or who

440
00:20:19,160 --> 00:20:23,080
Speaker 1: I was. I didn't know who it was or who

441
00:20:23,080 --> 00:20:27,880
Speaker 1: I was. I was at a very low point where

442
00:20:27,880 --> 00:20:30,760
Speaker 1: I was just lost and so vulnerable with myself. However,

443
00:20:30,840 --> 00:20:33,360
Speaker 1: that doesn't give it an excuse or justify what it did.

444
00:20:33,400 --> 00:20:36,800
Speaker 1: I've owned up to my mistakes, the three of them.

445
00:20:36,920 --> 00:20:41,680
Speaker 1: Well everyone knows comedically, you must do things in threes's charge.

446
00:20:42,640 --> 00:20:45,760
Speaker 1: I've accepted the consequences. I've let her go more times

447
00:20:45,880 --> 00:20:49,119
Speaker 1: than I could. However, we just weren't or aren't able

448
00:20:49,160 --> 00:20:52,399
Speaker 1: to leave each other. I am a completely different person

449
00:20:52,440 --> 00:20:54,560
Speaker 1: than who I was when we first started seeing each other.

450
00:20:54,640 --> 00:20:57,639
Speaker 1: I've grown and matured in so many ways. And I

451
00:20:57,640 --> 00:21:00,800
Speaker 1: am a very different person than the one she met,

452
00:21:00,960 --> 00:21:03,200
Speaker 1: and she has seen that. The last three to four

453
00:21:03,240 --> 00:21:06,000
Speaker 1: months have honestly been the absolute peak of our relationship

454
00:21:06,080 --> 00:21:08,840
Speaker 1: so far. We have never been more in love. We've

455
00:21:08,880 --> 00:21:12,320
Speaker 1: moved past everything, my mistakes, and everything that held our

456
00:21:12,359 --> 00:21:17,919
Speaker 1: relationship back. However, this past weekend, she was out with

457
00:21:17,960 --> 00:21:20,119
Speaker 1: her friends and she came across one of the guys

458
00:21:20,160 --> 00:21:24,600
Speaker 1: at her university that she was following at a party. Essentially,

459
00:21:24,640 --> 00:21:27,320
Speaker 1: they talked that night, and she ended up walking back

460
00:21:27,320 --> 00:21:29,960
Speaker 1: to her dorm alone and the guy followed after her

461
00:21:30,560 --> 00:21:32,520
Speaker 1: and asked her to go for a room tour at

462
00:21:32,520 --> 00:21:35,600
Speaker 1: both their places. There, they would talk for about forty

463
00:21:35,600 --> 00:21:37,959
Speaker 1: minutes when the topic of this guy's ex girlfriend had

464
00:21:38,040 --> 00:21:40,800
Speaker 1: cheated on him multiple times came up.

465
00:21:43,440 --> 00:21:47,240
Speaker 3: Okay, a room tour for forty minutes.

466
00:21:47,400 --> 00:21:50,159
Speaker 2: I'm sorry, her dorm for forty minutes.

467
00:21:50,320 --> 00:21:52,680
Speaker 1: There's no such thing as a dorm room tour.

468
00:21:55,160 --> 00:21:55,679
Speaker 2: Noah, there is.

469
00:21:56,000 --> 00:22:00,960
Speaker 1: Why Yeah, but you know what's gonna happen doesn't mean

470
00:22:00,960 --> 00:22:05,280
Speaker 1: a dorm room tour. It's never like, yeah, it's just crazy.

471
00:22:06,200 --> 00:22:08,800
Speaker 1: You'll only there's there's only one reason for a dorm

472
00:22:08,840 --> 00:22:09,320
Speaker 1: room tour.

473
00:22:09,720 --> 00:22:13,080
Speaker 2: Show you my manga My Animate Body Pollo.

474
00:22:14,160 --> 00:22:16,680
Speaker 1: Then she relates to this guy by telling him how

475
00:22:16,720 --> 00:22:19,600
Speaker 1: in her current relationship, I've cheated as well, and all

476
00:22:19,680 --> 00:22:22,920
Speaker 1: these angry upset, just full of anger at mixed emotions

477
00:22:22,960 --> 00:22:25,280
Speaker 1: came upon her. Keep in mind she's also in a

478
00:22:25,359 --> 00:22:27,960
Speaker 1: very intoxicated state. She ends up kissing the guy to

479
00:22:28,000 --> 00:22:30,359
Speaker 1: the point where the guy asks her to have spicy sleep,

480
00:22:30,520 --> 00:22:32,840
Speaker 1: and that was her cue to leave, which sobered her

481
00:22:32,960 --> 00:22:36,200
Speaker 1: up really quickly because she immediately felt guilty and upset

482
00:22:36,200 --> 00:22:39,120
Speaker 1: with herself and told the guy she had to go. However,

483
00:22:39,400 --> 00:22:41,639
Speaker 1: she got his phone number and he texted her if

484
00:22:41,640 --> 00:22:44,520
Speaker 1: she got home safe and goes good night girl next door,

485
00:22:44,720 --> 00:22:46,720
Speaker 1: and she said, good night boy next.

486
00:22:46,560 --> 00:22:48,080
Speaker 2: Door, holding odin.

487
00:22:48,400 --> 00:22:55,640
Speaker 1: They got vibes, the vibes ooikes, which I think hurt

488
00:22:55,640 --> 00:22:58,880
Speaker 1: the most more than the actual kissing situation, because there

489
00:22:58,920 --> 00:23:00,840
Speaker 1: was a connection there, or so it seems like they

490
00:23:00,880 --> 00:23:03,480
Speaker 1: were vibing or connecting on a different level. She ends

491
00:23:03,560 --> 00:23:06,080
Speaker 1: up telling me the following morning, and immediately she feels

492
00:23:06,119 --> 00:23:09,400
Speaker 1: so guilty she cried herself to sleep. She cried all

493
00:23:09,480 --> 00:23:12,959
Speaker 1: day yesterday and feels sickened with herself. I appreciated her

494
00:23:13,000 --> 00:23:15,280
Speaker 1: telling me, which was something I didn't do with any

495
00:23:15,320 --> 00:23:19,760
Speaker 1: of my three incidents. Because she found out and ope,

496
00:23:19,920 --> 00:23:23,440
Speaker 1: and this girl came to her girl. His girlfriend came

497
00:23:23,480 --> 00:23:25,600
Speaker 1: to him and said immediately, Hey, I guss this guy

498
00:23:25,840 --> 00:23:28,800
Speaker 1: this which is not great. I mean, obviously she cheated,

499
00:23:28,840 --> 00:23:31,200
Speaker 1: but at least she told them.

500
00:23:31,240 --> 00:23:32,280
Speaker 2: At least she was honest.

501
00:23:32,320 --> 00:23:33,399
Speaker 1: I think they need to break up.

502
00:23:34,480 --> 00:23:36,880
Speaker 2: This was never This was failed from the very get

503
00:23:36,920 --> 00:23:37,480
Speaker 2: go go.

504
00:23:38,880 --> 00:23:42,480
Speaker 1: I was very dishonest at the beginning of our relationship. However,

505
00:23:42,640 --> 00:23:45,840
Speaker 1: this caught me so off guard. Not ever what I

506
00:23:45,840 --> 00:23:48,119
Speaker 1: have thought this would ever happen. We were doing so

507
00:23:48,280 --> 00:23:51,560
Speaker 1: good and things were going great. However, that same morning,

508
00:23:51,600 --> 00:23:54,160
Speaker 1: the day of was when she did what she did.

509
00:23:54,920 --> 00:23:57,760
Speaker 1: We spent the entire day arguing over this one guy

510
00:23:57,880 --> 00:24:00,080
Speaker 1: she followed, who she claimed to be a friend with

511
00:24:00,080 --> 00:24:02,640
Speaker 1: within her group, who happens to be the same guy

512
00:24:02,720 --> 00:24:05,200
Speaker 1: she got with that same night. So there was already

513
00:24:05,480 --> 00:24:08,120
Speaker 1: tension or just frustration when she went out that night.

514
00:24:08,600 --> 00:24:12,159
Speaker 1: She told me, never ever, what she have imagined hanging

515
00:24:12,200 --> 00:24:14,560
Speaker 1: with him would lead to her kissing him. That was

516
00:24:14,640 --> 00:24:18,280
Speaker 1: never her intention, but it happened. She felt so angry

517
00:24:18,320 --> 00:24:20,159
Speaker 1: with herself for what I did in the past, and

518
00:24:20,200 --> 00:24:23,800
Speaker 1: she says it's not an excuse, but she said she's

519
00:24:23,800 --> 00:24:26,119
Speaker 1: a human and she messed up and her feelings and

520
00:24:26,160 --> 00:24:29,960
Speaker 1: emotions came upon her and she can't control it, and

521
00:24:30,000 --> 00:24:33,560
Speaker 1: she was very intoxicated, and she realizes clearly she made

522
00:24:33,600 --> 00:24:37,200
Speaker 1: such a big mistake. I'm in such a weird situation.

523
00:24:37,640 --> 00:24:40,040
Speaker 1: I don't know what to do. I love this girl

524
00:24:40,119 --> 00:24:41,760
Speaker 1: to death, and part of me just wants to move

525
00:24:41,840 --> 00:24:44,159
Speaker 1: past it, but another part of me doesn't for my

526
00:24:44,240 --> 00:24:46,800
Speaker 1: own good. But I am so confident that this would

527
00:24:46,960 --> 00:24:49,600
Speaker 1: ever happen again. But part of me also feels like

528
00:24:49,640 --> 00:24:54,439
Speaker 1: that doesn't matter. I hate myself because any person would leave. However,

529
00:24:54,520 --> 00:24:57,400
Speaker 1: my situation is way different, and this relationship is something

530
00:24:57,400 --> 00:24:59,800
Speaker 1: I am so in love with and I can tell

531
00:24:59,840 --> 00:25:01,800
Speaker 1: she is as well. But I don't know what to

532
00:25:01,800 --> 00:25:04,360
Speaker 1: do at all. I almost feel weird saying I want

533
00:25:04,359 --> 00:25:07,320
Speaker 1: to stay because I do, and I get it, But

534
00:25:07,320 --> 00:25:10,760
Speaker 1: there is the self respect part, however, she chose to say,

535
00:25:11,119 --> 00:25:14,800
Speaker 1: so why can't I? But you guys can join us

536
00:25:14,800 --> 00:25:16,440
Speaker 1: live every weekday at three pm PST.

537
00:25:16,600 --> 00:25:18,680
Speaker 2: Just stab her profile and there is really doing a

538
00:25:18,680 --> 00:25:19,080
Speaker 2: good job.

539
00:25:19,200 --> 00:25:20,880
Speaker 1: We're doing so well.

540
00:25:21,000 --> 00:25:24,000
Speaker 4: You're just a huge hypocrite, dude. That's that's not fair.

541
00:25:24,040 --> 00:25:27,280
Speaker 4: The fact that she came out immediately and she was

542
00:25:27,320 --> 00:25:30,240
Speaker 4: crying over the phone. Yes, she that was never her intention.

543
00:25:30,359 --> 00:25:32,840
Speaker 4: It was just out of like she was up in

544
00:25:32,880 --> 00:25:35,160
Speaker 4: the moment and she's like, what am I doing?

545
00:25:35,200 --> 00:25:36,320
Speaker 2: What am I d cheating?

546
00:25:36,359 --> 00:25:40,200
Speaker 4: I you made her leave that toxic lifestyle of being

547
00:25:40,280 --> 00:25:45,400
Speaker 4: cheated on and having trust issues, not once, not twice,

548
00:25:45,640 --> 00:25:49,480
Speaker 4: three times and you yeah, and you and she found

549
00:25:49,480 --> 00:25:51,920
Speaker 4: the proof. Yeah, and she probably did like a little

550
00:25:51,960 --> 00:25:53,359
Speaker 4: and she told you after the fire she did like

551
00:25:53,359 --> 00:25:56,560
Speaker 4: a little peck. Maybe maybe they made out sure, and

552
00:25:56,680 --> 00:25:58,520
Speaker 4: you're like, I can't stay with this.

553
00:25:58,640 --> 00:26:01,399
Speaker 1: I do. However, on the other hand, however, like I

554
00:26:01,400 --> 00:26:04,719
Speaker 1: do think it's hypocritical, But I do think that if

555
00:26:04,760 --> 00:26:08,600
Speaker 1: you're going to take someone back after cheating, then you

556
00:26:08,760 --> 00:26:11,480
Speaker 1: have to be able to work to try and get

557
00:26:11,480 --> 00:26:12,080
Speaker 1: trust back.

558
00:26:12,280 --> 00:26:12,480
Speaker 2: Yeah.

559
00:26:12,520 --> 00:26:13,800
Speaker 1: And I don't think there should be a tip for

560
00:26:13,840 --> 00:26:14,520
Speaker 1: tat kind of thing.

561
00:26:14,680 --> 00:26:15,760
Speaker 2: No, it's not an eye for an eye.

562
00:26:15,680 --> 00:26:19,240
Speaker 1: Kind of I think they should break up, honestly, Like

563
00:26:19,280 --> 00:26:21,920
Speaker 1: I think it's I understand it's it's gonna seem really

564
00:26:22,000 --> 00:26:23,760
Speaker 1: unfair on her part because she's like, you cheated three

565
00:26:23,760 --> 00:26:28,160
Speaker 1: times and I took you back yeah, and not necessarily

566
00:26:28,240 --> 00:26:32,080
Speaker 1: because he's in the right for anything here. But I

567
00:26:32,119 --> 00:26:35,239
Speaker 1: just think this relationship is no longer healthy. They help,

568
00:26:35,520 --> 00:26:38,040
Speaker 1: It was never healthy in the first place. It seems

569
00:26:38,080 --> 00:26:41,440
Speaker 1: like they can't continue without trying, like cheating on.

570
00:26:41,400 --> 00:26:42,879
Speaker 2: Each other in the back of the mind.

571
00:26:43,040 --> 00:26:43,880
Speaker 3: Yeah, both of.

572
00:26:43,840 --> 00:26:46,880
Speaker 1: Them now have trust issues, and so it doesn't seem

573
00:26:46,920 --> 00:26:48,960
Speaker 1: like they can. It doesn't seem like she's over it.

574
00:26:48,960 --> 00:26:51,239
Speaker 2: It's gonna be a guilt trip over and over and

575
00:26:51,280 --> 00:26:52,000
Speaker 2: over thing, and.

576
00:26:52,000 --> 00:26:53,600
Speaker 1: So I feel like they can't work past it. So

577
00:26:53,640 --> 00:26:55,960
Speaker 1: I do think they should break up. Yeah, but there's

578
00:26:56,000 --> 00:26:58,080
Speaker 1: a little bit more to the story. Okay, I just

579
00:26:58,160 --> 00:27:00,000
Speaker 1: don't know what I should feel or what I should

580
00:27:00,000 --> 00:27:02,639
Speaker 1: should be feeling. I want to stay so bad and

581
00:27:02,640 --> 00:27:04,480
Speaker 1: make it work, and I think and a mo Old

582
00:27:04,520 --> 00:27:07,639
Speaker 1: was so sure we can. But at the same time,

583
00:27:07,800 --> 00:27:10,120
Speaker 1: I just don't know what to do. I hate it

584
00:27:10,200 --> 00:27:13,199
Speaker 1: because I ruined a perfectly good girl. My actions had

585
00:27:13,240 --> 00:27:15,880
Speaker 1: consequences and it was bound to bury me one day

586
00:27:16,560 --> 00:27:18,919
Speaker 1: and it did. Now I am so lost with what

587
00:27:18,960 --> 00:27:20,840
Speaker 1: I should do. I don't want to leave because I've

588
00:27:20,880 --> 00:27:23,080
Speaker 1: done way worse and she stayed and she did something

589
00:27:23,119 --> 00:27:26,239
Speaker 1: severely less. But cheating is still cheating, and I don't know.

590
00:27:26,520 --> 00:27:28,760
Speaker 1: I really don't know. Most of me wants to stay,

591
00:27:28,880 --> 00:27:31,840
Speaker 1: but I don't know. Yeah, I think you.

592
00:27:31,720 --> 00:27:32,359
Speaker 3: Should break up.

593
00:27:32,440 --> 00:27:34,359
Speaker 4: I think you need to break up. Not because of

594
00:27:34,480 --> 00:27:37,400
Speaker 4: her actions, no, just because of the actions.

595
00:27:37,480 --> 00:27:40,040
Speaker 1: Yeah, just the actions on both sides.

596
00:27:40,160 --> 00:27:40,760
Speaker 2: The trauma.

597
00:27:41,040 --> 00:27:44,800
Speaker 1: There's no trust. She can't trust you again, rightfully, so,

598
00:27:44,800 --> 00:27:46,000
Speaker 1: so I feel like it's just over.

599
00:27:46,320 --> 00:27:46,520
Speaker 2: Yeah.

600
00:27:46,680 --> 00:27:48,680
Speaker 4: Like I said, it was doom from the very get go.

601
00:27:48,800 --> 00:27:50,920
Speaker 4: The fact that she kept coming back. You just made

602
00:27:50,920 --> 00:27:53,920
Speaker 4: this girl. I'm not gonna lie. She's gonna have this

603
00:27:54,040 --> 00:27:55,560
Speaker 4: issue for ever.

604
00:27:55,800 --> 00:27:57,680
Speaker 1: Yes, I agreed. I agreed.

605
00:27:57,920 --> 00:28:00,119
Speaker 2: I don't know. She it just I feel so bad

606
00:28:00,160 --> 00:28:03,800
Speaker 2: for her because she feels so guilty.

607
00:28:04,280 --> 00:28:07,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, she feels so guilty and just trying to like

608
00:28:07,080 --> 00:28:09,040
Speaker 1: work on this, but it's not going to work out.

609
00:28:09,600 --> 00:28:13,240
Speaker 3: My sister in law licked my face. Now my brother

610
00:28:13,320 --> 00:28:16,040
Speaker 3: doesn't want to talk to me. Well, she could have

611
00:28:16,080 --> 00:28:17,920
Speaker 3: done some worse to his face, and she could have

612
00:28:18,000 --> 00:28:21,200
Speaker 3: licked a worst part of the body, that's for sure.

613
00:28:21,680 --> 00:28:24,200
Speaker 3: I'm sorry for the title, but that's as concise as

614
00:28:24,240 --> 00:28:27,600
Speaker 3: I could be about it. I'm twenty two male and

615
00:28:27,640 --> 00:28:30,199
Speaker 3: my brother is twenty eight male. He's been engaged to

616
00:28:30,240 --> 00:28:33,160
Speaker 3: his fiance for a few months now. She is twenty four.

617
00:28:33,640 --> 00:28:36,840
Speaker 3: My brother's fiance is your typical spoiled party girl, and

618
00:28:36,960 --> 00:28:42,400
Speaker 3: tbh so is my brother. Matchmen have two spoiled party girls.

619
00:28:43,400 --> 00:28:46,240
Speaker 3: By the way, this comes from users strange temperature zero

620
00:28:46,320 --> 00:28:48,600
Speaker 3: zero on the r slash Okay storytime sub read it.

621
00:28:49,000 --> 00:28:52,479
Speaker 3: So in the last year or so, my brother and

622
00:28:52,480 --> 00:28:55,480
Speaker 3: I have had a strained relationship. This is mostly due

623
00:28:55,480 --> 00:28:57,760
Speaker 3: to differences of opinion when helping to take care of

624
00:28:57,760 --> 00:29:01,760
Speaker 3: our mom, who's struggling with some PTSD slash anxiety. She

625
00:29:01,840 --> 00:29:04,680
Speaker 3: got held hostage by a manager job and is still

626
00:29:04,720 --> 00:29:06,320
Speaker 3: recovering and not back to work yet.

627
00:29:06,480 --> 00:29:09,920
Speaker 5: What the heck that is out of all the PTSD

628
00:29:10,040 --> 00:29:12,120
Speaker 5: problems I thought she had, that was not on the

629
00:29:12,160 --> 00:29:12,720
Speaker 5: list I had.

630
00:29:12,800 --> 00:29:15,400
Speaker 3: Yeah, I would not expect hostage situations. Shout out to

631
00:29:15,480 --> 00:29:19,160
Speaker 3: OPI's mom for being on the road to recovery. That's rough.

632
00:29:20,520 --> 00:29:23,720
Speaker 3: For some context, my brother is a very impatient and

633
00:29:23,800 --> 00:29:26,640
Speaker 3: opinionated person who struggles to see things outside of his

634
00:29:26,680 --> 00:29:29,400
Speaker 3: own perspective. He doesn't have a good grasp on mental

635
00:29:29,440 --> 00:29:31,680
Speaker 3: health and he is easily persuaded by what he reads

636
00:29:31,720 --> 00:29:35,920
Speaker 3: online and gets caught up in conspiracy theories. I noticed

637
00:29:36,040 --> 00:29:40,280
Speaker 3: the COVID slash pandemic kind of exacerbated all of this.

638
00:29:41,480 --> 00:29:43,800
Speaker 3: I work as a paramedic, and he's been arguing with

639
00:29:43,880 --> 00:29:48,240
Speaker 3: me about thinking I know better than him ever since. Oh,

640
00:29:48,840 --> 00:29:51,280
Speaker 3: I mean, you're a paramedic, so I would hope that

641
00:29:51,320 --> 00:29:55,720
Speaker 3: you know better. Right, Well, let's hope. So I'm adopted

642
00:29:55,880 --> 00:29:58,600
Speaker 3: and my bio mom was of a different ethnicity, so

643
00:29:58,640 --> 00:30:00,960
Speaker 3: we don't look like brothers. When he can't think of

644
00:30:01,000 --> 00:30:02,800
Speaker 3: a way to win an argument, he brings up the

645
00:30:02,800 --> 00:30:06,440
Speaker 3: fact that I'm not his real son or his real brother.

646
00:30:08,080 --> 00:30:10,600
Speaker 3: That's all he could do. You're gonna just use adoption

647
00:30:10,840 --> 00:30:13,840
Speaker 3: to win an argument. That's the lame. Uh. You know

648
00:30:14,400 --> 00:30:19,840
Speaker 3: maybe just because you're adopted, Uh you adopted, dude, being adopted,

649
00:30:19,880 --> 00:30:22,120
Speaker 3: you have the best clap back, you know what it is? Yeah,

650
00:30:22,200 --> 00:30:24,840
Speaker 3: because it's like they wanted me. At least they wanted

651
00:30:24,880 --> 00:30:32,080
Speaker 3: me boom slam dunk um. It wasn't always like this

652
00:30:32,160 --> 00:30:35,880
Speaker 3: between us, which is sad. He's just not the same person.

653
00:30:36,000 --> 00:30:38,080
Speaker 3: And I'm not sure if it's the work stress or

654
00:30:38,120 --> 00:30:40,920
Speaker 3: life stress or what I get that this post is

655
00:30:40,920 --> 00:30:43,080
Speaker 3: gonna be skewed by my perspective, but I'll try to

656
00:30:43,080 --> 00:30:45,920
Speaker 3: be objective when it comes to the conflict. My birthday

657
00:30:46,000 --> 00:30:48,760
Speaker 3: was last weekend, which is when this happened. My brother's

658
00:30:48,760 --> 00:30:51,800
Speaker 3: fiance apparently had the idea to throw me a surprise party.

659
00:30:51,920 --> 00:30:54,720
Speaker 3: Oh what a nice thing for her to suggest. That's

660
00:30:54,800 --> 00:30:57,080
Speaker 3: so sweet. I'm sure she won't do anything to make

661
00:30:57,160 --> 00:31:01,640
Speaker 3: your brother upset. Couldn't imagine what she could do. Most

662
00:31:01,680 --> 00:31:03,440
Speaker 3: of the people there were friends of my brother and

663
00:31:03,480 --> 00:31:07,800
Speaker 3: the fiance, and everyone was wasted. They made a bit

664
00:31:07,800 --> 00:31:09,760
Speaker 3: of a show, bringing me out a cake and having

665
00:31:09,760 --> 00:31:12,080
Speaker 3: me blow out the candles. But before I did that,

666
00:31:12,200 --> 00:31:15,720
Speaker 3: my brother's fiance swiped frosting on her finger and put

667
00:31:15,720 --> 00:31:18,840
Speaker 3: it on my cheek. Okay, I think I know where

668
00:31:18,880 --> 00:31:22,640
Speaker 3: this is going. I thought it was just her being

669
00:31:22,720 --> 00:31:25,080
Speaker 3: nice and not trying to smash a piece of cake

670
00:31:25,120 --> 00:31:27,680
Speaker 3: in my face. I blew out the candles, and after

671
00:31:27,760 --> 00:31:32,040
Speaker 3: I did that, his fiance grabbed my face and licked it,

672
00:31:32,800 --> 00:31:36,000
Speaker 3: like from my jaw all the way up the side

673
00:31:36,000 --> 00:31:38,560
Speaker 3: of my face. I'm gonna try to be John for

674
00:31:38,600 --> 00:31:39,040
Speaker 3: a second.

675
00:31:39,680 --> 00:31:47,760
Speaker 5: Oh god, oh gosh, shoo. You know I would expect

676
00:31:47,760 --> 00:31:52,760
Speaker 5: that from my girlfriend. Yeah, that is girlfriend to behaved

677
00:31:52,760 --> 00:31:53,200
Speaker 5: maybe she.

678
00:31:53,240 --> 00:31:56,320
Speaker 3: Just got confused. Well, she couldn't have got confused yet,

679
00:31:56,480 --> 00:31:59,120
Speaker 3: like they look anything alike. Made it very clear that

680
00:31:59,200 --> 00:32:05,040
Speaker 3: they do not look. I have no idea why she

681
00:32:05,160 --> 00:32:07,880
Speaker 3: did this. We don't even have the kind of relationship

682
00:32:07,880 --> 00:32:11,240
Speaker 3: where it would be funny. My brother's face changed, his

683
00:32:11,360 --> 00:32:14,920
Speaker 3: demeanor changed, and he became very withdrawn and irritable, which

684
00:32:16,920 --> 00:32:20,560
Speaker 3: I look. I mean, everyone's been drinking. Everyone's a little

685
00:32:20,800 --> 00:32:25,320
Speaker 3: you know, so to speak. I would chalk it up

686
00:32:25,360 --> 00:32:28,360
Speaker 3: to that this guy, if I was the brother, If

687
00:32:28,360 --> 00:32:31,640
Speaker 3: I'm getting again, I'm not trying to make this a

688
00:32:31,680 --> 00:32:35,440
Speaker 3: big deal. It's my brother. She's being cheeky, she's drunk.

689
00:32:36,320 --> 00:32:38,120
Speaker 3: I'm moving on. I'm moving forward from this. But it

690
00:32:38,160 --> 00:32:40,880
Speaker 3: doesn't sound like this guy has a kind of healthy mindset.

691
00:32:40,960 --> 00:32:43,240
Speaker 3: Don't think he has the emotional maturity to let that

692
00:32:43,280 --> 00:32:49,920
Speaker 3: one go. They were seen quietly fighting and he ended

693
00:32:50,000 --> 00:32:53,080
Speaker 3: up just leaving the party. Oh gosh. I brought it

694
00:32:53,160 --> 00:32:55,000
Speaker 3: up the next day to make sure he was okay,

695
00:32:55,120 --> 00:32:58,200
Speaker 3: and apparently the two of them made up. It's me

696
00:32:58,360 --> 00:33:03,560
Speaker 3: that he has an issue with hmm. Wow, shocker. I

697
00:33:03,560 --> 00:33:05,520
Speaker 3: don't know what she told him, but it seems as

698
00:33:05,560 --> 00:33:07,880
Speaker 3: if I'm the one being made out to be flirting

699
00:33:07,880 --> 00:33:10,640
Speaker 3: with her and wanting her, et cetera, which is not

700
00:33:11,160 --> 00:33:15,880
Speaker 3: even remotely true. Oh they are a perfect match made

701
00:33:15,880 --> 00:33:19,960
Speaker 3: in heaven. Yeah, she did the old classic switcheroo. It

702
00:33:20,040 --> 00:33:25,400
Speaker 3: wasn't me, it was him. Ooh he planted that frosting

703
00:33:25,440 --> 00:33:27,840
Speaker 3: on his face for me to lick off. Oh my gosh,

704
00:33:28,160 --> 00:33:33,480
Speaker 3: h I don't think so, girl. I'm buying it. I

705
00:33:33,600 --> 00:33:36,920
Speaker 3: told him leave me out of his relationship. It's his

706
00:33:37,080 --> 00:33:40,400
Speaker 3: partner who disrespected him and embarrassed him. He's angry at

707
00:33:40,400 --> 00:33:42,920
Speaker 3: the wrong person. Oh wait, I missed a word there.

708
00:33:44,080 --> 00:33:47,080
Speaker 3: I told him to leave me out of his relationship problems.

709
00:33:47,520 --> 00:33:50,720
Speaker 3: It's his partner who disrespected him and embarrassed him. He's

710
00:33:50,760 --> 00:33:54,760
Speaker 3: angry at the wrong person. I refuse to apologize. Apparently

711
00:33:54,800 --> 00:33:57,320
Speaker 3: I'm going to be out of the wedding unless I do.

712
00:33:57,960 --> 00:34:01,080
Speaker 3: He's upset because I won't admit to my miss. Well,

713
00:34:01,440 --> 00:34:04,360
Speaker 3: I don't feel like I made one. Yeah, yeah, I

714
00:34:04,400 --> 00:34:06,320
Speaker 3: don't feel like you did either. What you're supposed to

715
00:34:06,320 --> 00:34:09,000
Speaker 3: do like shover off of you. But then you've got

716
00:34:09,000 --> 00:34:11,840
Speaker 3: another mistake that you've made. Now it's like, oh you do,

717
00:34:11,960 --> 00:34:15,160
Speaker 3: maybe give you a weird eye. Like, yeah, maybe you

718
00:34:15,160 --> 00:34:18,239
Speaker 3: should have recoiled. You should have recoiled harder. If you're

719
00:34:18,320 --> 00:34:21,200
Speaker 3: really my bro and you weren't adopted, you would have recoiled.

720
00:34:22,840 --> 00:34:25,440
Speaker 3: That's what he's gonna throw at you. He's gonna bring

721
00:34:25,520 --> 00:34:30,600
Speaker 3: up the adoption in some way. Oh yeah, dude, I

722
00:34:30,640 --> 00:34:34,520
Speaker 3: don't feel like uh uh, well, I don't feel like

723
00:34:34,560 --> 00:34:36,319
Speaker 3: I made one. Should I just do it for the

724
00:34:36,400 --> 00:34:39,279
Speaker 3: sake of settling it? Normally I'm willing to be the

725
00:34:39,320 --> 00:34:41,680
Speaker 3: bigger person, but this is a false accusation that I

726
00:34:41,719 --> 00:34:45,000
Speaker 3: don't want attached to myself. Am I the a hole?

727
00:34:45,920 --> 00:34:48,680
Speaker 3: And there are some comments here? And I wonder let

728
00:34:48,680 --> 00:34:53,080
Speaker 3: me see if there's an update too. Uh. I think

729
00:34:53,080 --> 00:34:54,920
Speaker 3: we've just got a lot. Oh, we do have an

730
00:34:55,000 --> 00:34:57,120
Speaker 3: update and a lot of comments, a lot of comments.

731
00:34:57,280 --> 00:35:00,200
Speaker 5: It's you're nowhere near the hole and I'm sorry, sorry

732
00:35:00,280 --> 00:35:03,040
Speaker 5: that there are people in your life that make you

733
00:35:03,040 --> 00:35:07,600
Speaker 5: feel like you are when in reality people need to

734
00:35:07,600 --> 00:35:08,640
Speaker 5: get their eyes checked.

735
00:35:08,880 --> 00:35:13,920
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's like that was clearly someone else's mistake that

736
00:35:13,960 --> 00:35:16,800
Speaker 3: they made, which would be the fiance of your brother.

737
00:35:16,920 --> 00:35:19,800
Speaker 5: You did nothing to egg this on or initiate it. Yeah,

738
00:35:19,840 --> 00:35:20,960
Speaker 5: you're good.

739
00:35:20,640 --> 00:35:23,680
Speaker 3: She just licked the wrong face and is now making

740
00:35:23,719 --> 00:35:27,759
Speaker 3: it your problem. What are these comments? So let's get yeah,

741
00:35:27,800 --> 00:35:32,680
Speaker 3: let's see what these comments say. Uh kallus Cimac says,

742
00:35:33,000 --> 00:35:36,600
Speaker 3: your brother and his fiance are behaving like children. If

743
00:35:36,640 --> 00:35:38,880
Speaker 3: you apologize for this incident, then it's likely that he

744
00:35:38,920 --> 00:35:41,360
Speaker 3: will continue to treat you with disrespect, and if he

745
00:35:41,440 --> 00:35:43,440
Speaker 3: takes you out of the wedding, he'll have to explain

746
00:35:43,480 --> 00:35:46,000
Speaker 3: the reason to others, which should prove embarrassing to him

747
00:35:46,040 --> 00:35:49,920
Speaker 3: and his fiance. Perhaps you should call him on his bluff. Hmmmm,

748
00:35:50,239 --> 00:35:53,359
Speaker 3: I haven't thought about that regardless, not the a hole

749
00:35:53,680 --> 00:35:56,840
Speaker 3: and OPI responds, you know what, I'm not opposed to

750
00:35:56,920 --> 00:35:59,080
Speaker 3: threatening him with that. Thank you? What was it? Sorry?

751
00:35:59,120 --> 00:36:01,200
Speaker 3: What was this bluff? Again? The bluff is, he says,

752
00:36:01,280 --> 00:36:03,920
Speaker 3: if you don't apologize, then you can't come to the wedding. Gotcha.

753
00:36:04,680 --> 00:36:07,520
Speaker 3: An edit to provide a little more context. Somebody asked

754
00:36:07,600 --> 00:36:11,640
Speaker 3: if she had flirted with Op in the past. Ope responds,

755
00:36:12,280 --> 00:36:15,719
Speaker 3: I never thought about it, and actually nothing really sticks out.

756
00:36:16,200 --> 00:36:18,960
Speaker 3: She's obsessed with K pop and I'm half Korean, so

757
00:36:19,040 --> 00:36:21,560
Speaker 3: she's made comments to me, but I didn't interpret them

758
00:36:21,600 --> 00:36:23,719
Speaker 3: as flirting. I thought she was just trying to be nice,

759
00:36:23,800 --> 00:36:25,640
Speaker 3: and I don't know how else to connect when I

760
00:36:25,760 --> 00:36:29,640
Speaker 3: shared about the whole being adopted thing. When she's sober,

761
00:36:29,800 --> 00:36:32,600
Speaker 3: she's way more awkward and shy. My brother lives with

762
00:36:32,719 --> 00:36:34,840
Speaker 3: my mom, so usually when I visit and we're talking,

763
00:36:35,239 --> 00:36:37,680
Speaker 3: my mom and brother are around two and it's more

764
00:36:37,719 --> 00:36:40,640
Speaker 3: of a family vibe. Gotcha. So maybe there's like a

765
00:36:40,680 --> 00:36:45,400
Speaker 3: little secret, secret crush that the fiance has on Ope.

766
00:36:45,760 --> 00:36:47,600
Speaker 3: I could see that. That only came out after she

767
00:36:47,719 --> 00:36:50,759
Speaker 3: got a little crunk crunk on the drunk sauce, you

768
00:36:50,840 --> 00:36:53,880
Speaker 3: know what I'm saying. I could definitely see that, And

769
00:36:54,040 --> 00:36:58,160
Speaker 3: maybe brother knows this. Brother knows this, and that's why

770
00:36:58,239 --> 00:37:00,400
Speaker 3: he got so defensive. I don't think brother can know

771
00:37:00,520 --> 00:37:03,880
Speaker 3: that and still be with her. Well, it would make

772
00:37:03,920 --> 00:37:07,160
Speaker 3: sense why he's projecting it onto the brother then, because

773
00:37:07,320 --> 00:37:10,320
Speaker 3: you can't reconcile it with the fiance. I don't because

774
00:37:10,360 --> 00:37:12,600
Speaker 3: that's not really reconcilable, being like, you have a crush

775
00:37:12,640 --> 00:37:14,800
Speaker 3: on my brother. Yeah, getting married, I don't think. I

776
00:37:14,800 --> 00:37:18,399
Speaker 3: don't think he'd still be with her though. Well, let's

777
00:37:18,400 --> 00:37:20,960
Speaker 3: see what happened in this update. Oh boy, let's see

778
00:37:20,960 --> 00:37:25,520
Speaker 3: what happened in the update. After trying to reach out

779
00:37:25,560 --> 00:37:28,320
Speaker 3: to my brother. He finally came around and stopped ignoring me.

780
00:37:28,840 --> 00:37:30,880
Speaker 3: He didn't want to talk about what happened, but was

781
00:37:31,000 --> 00:37:34,080
Speaker 3: willing to put it behind us. To be honest, I

782
00:37:34,120 --> 00:37:36,279
Speaker 3: think talking about it would have been healthier, but I

783
00:37:36,400 --> 00:37:38,640
Speaker 3: decided to let it go because he was so adamant

784
00:37:38,640 --> 00:37:42,840
Speaker 3: about it. Then, just the other day, he came to

785
00:37:42,960 --> 00:37:46,240
Speaker 3: me on his own and admit that he feels unsure

786
00:37:46,239 --> 00:37:49,360
Speaker 3: about his relationship and is struggling to trust his fiance

787
00:37:49,600 --> 00:37:52,200
Speaker 3: ever since the incident on my birthday. So he came

788
00:37:52,280 --> 00:37:55,360
Speaker 3: to his census. Wow, So he realized, Hey, maybe I

789
00:37:55,520 --> 00:37:59,120
Speaker 3: don't want face liquor as a wife. Hmmm, because she's

790
00:37:59,200 --> 00:38:04,200
Speaker 3: not licking my why is she looking your face? Adopted brother?

791
00:38:04,800 --> 00:38:07,040
Speaker 3: I told him there's no rush to get married and

792
00:38:07,120 --> 00:38:09,360
Speaker 3: he should take his time to figure out what he's feeling.

793
00:38:09,800 --> 00:38:12,400
Speaker 3: I didn't try to give any particular opinion because I

794
00:38:12,440 --> 00:38:14,440
Speaker 3: feel like this is something he needs to figure out

795
00:38:14,560 --> 00:38:18,400
Speaker 3: for himself. Also, I genuinely don't know what's going on

796
00:38:18,520 --> 00:38:21,520
Speaker 3: between them. He still took what I said the wrong

797
00:38:21,600 --> 00:38:25,920
Speaker 3: way somehow, and we ended up having an argument. Of course,

798
00:38:26,480 --> 00:38:28,560
Speaker 3: that's so weird. You're just trying to be like, you

799
00:38:28,640 --> 00:38:31,120
Speaker 3: don't have to rush into this marriage because what they've

800
00:38:31,480 --> 00:38:33,200
Speaker 3: been engaged for just a couple months, you can have

801
00:38:33,239 --> 00:38:35,800
Speaker 3: in long engagement. And he's trying to be like, what

802
00:38:36,120 --> 00:38:38,640
Speaker 3: do you think that we're OP belong together? It's like

803
00:38:38,800 --> 00:38:41,520
Speaker 3: you just came to me and said that. Yeah, but

804
00:38:41,640 --> 00:38:43,480
Speaker 3: I'll tell you right now. You can always come to

805
00:38:43,640 --> 00:38:46,600
Speaker 3: us every weekday when we go live on YouTube at

806
00:38:46,719 --> 00:38:50,160
Speaker 3: three pm PST. All you gotta do is tap our profile.

807
00:38:50,800 --> 00:38:53,960
Speaker 3: So let's discuss before we finish this story off. What's

808
00:38:54,040 --> 00:38:56,279
Speaker 3: the right path of action here. I don't know. They

809
00:38:56,320 --> 00:38:58,719
Speaker 3: don't really sound healthy for one another. I don't think

810
00:38:59,000 --> 00:39:02,200
Speaker 3: the brother is a person that is honestly, I don't

811
00:39:02,200 --> 00:39:04,320
Speaker 3: think he's ready to be married yet or seems like

812
00:39:04,360 --> 00:39:06,600
Speaker 3: a person to be married. And if he's unsure about

813
00:39:06,640 --> 00:39:10,799
Speaker 3: his engagement, like you said, make it a little longer, yeah,

814
00:39:11,080 --> 00:39:14,799
Speaker 3: a long engagement. I think OP doesn't have to worry

815
00:39:14,800 --> 00:39:16,759
Speaker 3: about not getting invited to the wedding from the sound

816
00:39:16,760 --> 00:39:19,080
Speaker 3: of it, because I don't know if there's even gonna

817
00:39:19,160 --> 00:39:24,800
Speaker 3: be one. Yeah, let's finish this off, shower right. My

818
00:39:24,920 --> 00:39:27,160
Speaker 3: brother thinks that I'm not happy for him, and I

819
00:39:27,239 --> 00:39:30,280
Speaker 3: don't want to see him successful or starting a family.

820
00:39:31,120 --> 00:39:32,759
Speaker 3: I tried to walk away at this point in the

821
00:39:32,800 --> 00:39:34,960
Speaker 3: conversation because no matter what I said, it was just

822
00:39:35,040 --> 00:39:38,480
Speaker 3: gonna get misconstrued. But he didn't want to stop fighting.

823
00:39:38,760 --> 00:39:43,200
Speaker 3: Oh brother. Somewhere in that I finally learned why he's

824
00:39:43,280 --> 00:39:45,959
Speaker 3: so mad at me these days. It turns out he's

825
00:39:46,000 --> 00:39:49,560
Speaker 3: been pissed that our mom paid for my tuition. Oh wow,

826
00:39:49,760 --> 00:39:53,440
Speaker 3: I've been doing over time to pay her back. Clarification,

827
00:39:53,600 --> 00:39:56,000
Speaker 3: if it matters, She doesn't actually want me to pay

828
00:39:56,040 --> 00:39:58,040
Speaker 3: her back. It was a gift, but I would like

829
00:39:58,120 --> 00:40:01,279
Speaker 3: to pay her back slowly. Also, OP is a man

830
00:40:01,360 --> 00:40:05,759
Speaker 3: of principle. Yeah yeah, which good for you. Op. My

831
00:40:05,880 --> 00:40:07,880
Speaker 3: brother feels like this money should have been given to

832
00:40:08,000 --> 00:40:12,239
Speaker 3: him for his wedding, which I am no longer invited to. Hey,

833
00:40:12,440 --> 00:40:16,840
Speaker 3: congratulations on missing the chaos the disaster. Gosh, this guy's

834
00:40:16,880 --> 00:40:20,160
Speaker 3: so entitled. Yeah, you're better off without it. You don't

835
00:40:20,239 --> 00:40:22,680
Speaker 3: need to be there. I don't really know how to

836
00:40:22,760 --> 00:40:25,880
Speaker 3: fix things, but that's where we're at. Oh, and you

837
00:40:25,960 --> 00:40:28,840
Speaker 3: know what, we do have some comments that really just

838
00:40:28,920 --> 00:40:31,839
Speaker 3: sort of agree here that OP is not the one

839
00:40:32,000 --> 00:40:35,439
Speaker 3: the fault in this situation. And you know, I don't

840
00:40:35,480 --> 00:40:37,279
Speaker 3: know if there's anything you can do about this, op,

841
00:40:37,440 --> 00:40:40,480
Speaker 3: because it seems like most of this isn't even about

842
00:40:40,680 --> 00:40:43,400
Speaker 3: your relationship, you know, with your brother. It's more about

843
00:40:43,480 --> 00:40:47,040
Speaker 3: his relationship with his fiance and mom, yeah, and the mom.

844
00:40:47,360 --> 00:40:50,600
Speaker 5: But yeah, the tuition is entitled on that point. My

845
00:40:51,000 --> 00:40:55,240
Speaker 5: participaid for my tuition, not my brothers. But my brothers

846
00:40:55,440 --> 00:40:57,759
Speaker 5: did not make good grades in high school, and they

847
00:40:57,960 --> 00:40:59,800
Speaker 5: clearly like said, hey, if you don't make good grades,

848
00:41:00,200 --> 00:41:01,040
Speaker 5: we're not gonna.

849
00:41:01,000 --> 00:41:02,960
Speaker 3: Yeah, there you go, but you got to have the

850
00:41:03,040 --> 00:41:04,600
Speaker 3: return on investment, right, But he got.

851
00:41:04,560 --> 00:41:06,560
Speaker 5: Better grades in college, just started working hard and they

852
00:41:06,560 --> 00:41:07,960
Speaker 5: saw that and they're like, you know what, Okay.

853
00:41:07,760 --> 00:41:10,560
Speaker 3: Cool, we'll do it. But yeah, you could dan on

854
00:41:10,680 --> 00:41:12,759
Speaker 3: the back on the back end, on the back end. Yeah,

855
00:41:13,040 --> 00:41:16,279
Speaker 3: it's weird to think that he is entitled to this money.

856
00:41:16,880 --> 00:41:20,279
Speaker 3: I think the weirdest thing is is the context in

857
00:41:20,360 --> 00:41:23,080
Speaker 3: which he feels entitled to it, like cause he's getting married. Yeah,

858
00:41:23,120 --> 00:41:25,240
Speaker 3: it's like that money should have been for my wedding.

859
00:41:25,320 --> 00:41:27,480
Speaker 3: It's like, how you I don't even think you can

860
00:41:27,520 --> 00:41:31,640
Speaker 3: equate those two things. It's like one is like like

861
00:41:31,880 --> 00:41:36,040
Speaker 3: going to college, and then the other is just an event. Yeah,

862
00:41:36,120 --> 00:41:38,200
Speaker 3: it's like those aren't the same things, and he probably

863
00:41:38,200 --> 00:41:40,320
Speaker 3: feels entitled to it because he keeps throwing up in

864
00:41:40,400 --> 00:41:43,960
Speaker 3: his face. You're not actually my biological brother. Yeah, so

865
00:41:44,080 --> 00:41:46,959
Speaker 3: he probably feels the resentment towards that. Yep, that makes sense.

866
00:41:47,239 --> 00:41:48,520
Speaker 3: Oh no, let me know in the comments what you

867
00:41:48,560 --> 00:41:51,960
Speaker 3: guys think. Yeah, we just a real poopy baby. Oh

868
00:41:52,120 --> 00:41:56,319
Speaker 3: he's older brother, a real poopy baby. That's in that story. Yeah,

869
00:41:56,400 --> 00:41:59,080
Speaker 3: that is the end of that story. My twin sister

870
00:41:59,320 --> 00:42:03,560
Speaker 3: always called trouble. Now my boyfriend insists I should kick

871
00:42:03,600 --> 00:42:07,640
Speaker 3: her out. I insist who it's like the ying, ying

872
00:42:07,880 --> 00:42:11,000
Speaker 3: and yang. Let me give some background for this story.

873
00:42:11,239 --> 00:42:16,120
Speaker 3: My boyfriend a currently twenty five and me n twenty six,

874
00:42:16,280 --> 00:42:19,200
Speaker 3: So we're gonna call that Aaron and Natalie. That's what

875
00:42:19,239 --> 00:42:22,920
Speaker 3: we're gonna do. I have been dating since July twenty twenty.

876
00:42:23,440 --> 00:42:25,440
Speaker 3: We decided to move in with each other in June

877
00:42:25,520 --> 00:42:28,640
Speaker 3: of twenty twenty one. When we first started dating, Aaron

878
00:42:28,719 --> 00:42:31,800
Speaker 3: tells me that Elle would tell him that she didn't

879
00:42:31,920 --> 00:42:34,080
Speaker 3: like him and that she would do anything to get

880
00:42:34,200 --> 00:42:36,640
Speaker 3: rid of him. We have not been introduced to Elle,

881
00:42:36,640 --> 00:42:39,560
Speaker 3: but I'm gonna call her Lindsey lindsay. I was gonna say,

882
00:42:39,600 --> 00:42:45,200
Speaker 3: Lauren Lauren, all right, we'll do Lauren. Sure, we'll do Aaron, Lauren,

883
00:42:45,960 --> 00:42:48,560
Speaker 3: and Natalie. Okay, those are the names we have. Lauren.

884
00:42:49,000 --> 00:42:51,200
Speaker 3: So when we first started dating, Aaron tells me that

885
00:42:51,400 --> 00:42:54,120
Speaker 3: Lauren would tell him that she didn't like him and

886
00:42:54,200 --> 00:42:56,200
Speaker 3: that she would do anything to get rid of him.

887
00:42:57,040 --> 00:42:58,920
Speaker 3: I didn't think that she would say or do anything

888
00:42:59,080 --> 00:43:02,880
Speaker 3: like that. You guys have the same type. Yeah, are

889
00:43:02,920 --> 00:43:05,600
Speaker 3: you sure you know your twin? By the way, this

890
00:43:05,719 --> 00:43:08,640
Speaker 3: comes from us your Agitated League eighty eight eleven on

891
00:43:08,719 --> 00:43:11,120
Speaker 3: the r slash. Okay, storytime, So I read it. So

892
00:43:12,200 --> 00:43:14,800
Speaker 3: we got a one bedroom apartment and we're having the

893
00:43:14,920 --> 00:43:17,680
Speaker 3: time of our lives. Let's go. My twin sister, Lauren

894
00:43:17,800 --> 00:43:19,839
Speaker 3: was living with her boyfriend at the time in her

895
00:43:19,960 --> 00:43:23,040
Speaker 3: own apartment. A few months later, in October, she finds

896
00:43:23,040 --> 00:43:25,719
Speaker 3: out her boyfriend cheated on her, so she calls me

897
00:43:25,880 --> 00:43:27,600
Speaker 3: to ask if she can move in for a short

898
00:43:27,680 --> 00:43:31,880
Speaker 3: period of time. We're she gonna go. I mean, you know,

899
00:43:32,280 --> 00:43:35,920
Speaker 3: she's gonna just surf. Hey, twin, sister, you got a

900
00:43:35,920 --> 00:43:38,200
Speaker 3: spot for me. I would like to think that if

901
00:43:38,239 --> 00:43:39,680
Speaker 3: I had a twin that they would have a spot

902
00:43:39,719 --> 00:43:41,880
Speaker 3: for me if I found out my girlfriend was cheating

903
00:43:41,920 --> 00:43:43,719
Speaker 3: on me, that's true, and I had to move. Aaron

904
00:43:43,800 --> 00:43:46,120
Speaker 3: and Me said, yeah, that's fine because that was a

905
00:43:46,239 --> 00:43:49,520
Speaker 3: really crappy thing of him to do. Yeah, let's fast

906
00:43:49,640 --> 00:43:52,960
Speaker 3: forward now to January. So what three months have gone by, Okay,

907
00:43:53,080 --> 00:43:56,480
Speaker 3: and she has a new boyfriend. Now let's go. Okay,

908
00:43:57,160 --> 00:44:00,719
Speaker 3: go with Lauren, move out now, yeah, moving with him.

909
00:44:02,160 --> 00:44:04,080
Speaker 3: I started to ask her, like, hey, when do you

910
00:44:04,120 --> 00:44:06,879
Speaker 3: think you're going to be moving out? And that's when

911
00:44:06,960 --> 00:44:11,480
Speaker 3: she says, actually, I have an idea. Aaron looks at me,

912
00:44:11,719 --> 00:44:17,120
Speaker 3: and I'm like, okay, what's this idea? She recommended that

913
00:44:17,520 --> 00:44:21,359
Speaker 3: her and her boyfriend and Aaron and I move into

914
00:44:21,400 --> 00:44:26,240
Speaker 3: a two bedroom apartment. I'm like, sure, because we're twins

915
00:44:26,280 --> 00:44:29,319
Speaker 3: and we have this bond that no one really understands. Okay, yeah,

916
00:44:29,480 --> 00:44:31,680
Speaker 3: we've always been really close and we did everything with

917
00:44:31,760 --> 00:44:34,560
Speaker 3: each other until college and she started dating and moved out.

918
00:44:35,280 --> 00:44:38,840
Speaker 3: So op, he is very receptive to this idea. Yeah. Anyways,

919
00:44:39,400 --> 00:44:41,880
Speaker 3: so we upgraded to a two bedroom apartment in June

920
00:44:42,000 --> 00:44:45,600
Speaker 3: of twenty twenty two. Okay, so the months got it.

921
00:44:45,920 --> 00:44:49,160
Speaker 3: Fast forward another five months, boom. Both of the couples

922
00:44:49,200 --> 00:44:51,839
Speaker 3: are living in the same apartment, nothing could go wrong.

923
00:44:53,920 --> 00:44:58,360
Speaker 3: Oh that's where you're that's where you're wrong, Riley. We

924
00:44:58,520 --> 00:45:02,040
Speaker 3: split everything in half on the bills. Everything was in

925
00:45:02,280 --> 00:45:05,960
Speaker 3: Aaron and I's name, and we paid and Lauren and

926
00:45:06,080 --> 00:45:09,800
Speaker 3: her boyfriend paid us half of it back. Okay, okay

927
00:45:10,000 --> 00:45:14,520
Speaker 3: in October or so. So we've gone what four months

928
00:45:14,640 --> 00:45:17,840
Speaker 3: into the future again, yep, four months into the future.

929
00:45:18,280 --> 00:45:22,040
Speaker 3: She eventually breaks up with this guy too. I was

930
00:45:23,000 --> 00:45:25,920
Speaker 3: no way a relationship where you started dating and then

931
00:45:26,040 --> 00:45:28,520
Speaker 3: three months into it you move into an apartment together.

932
00:45:28,680 --> 00:45:33,759
Speaker 3: Didn't work out? You thought, you're kidding me. So she

933
00:45:33,880 --> 00:45:36,440
Speaker 3: starts seeing this guy from her job, and she's not

934
00:45:36,600 --> 00:45:38,640
Speaker 3: paying us the full amount that she owes anymore for

935
00:45:38,719 --> 00:45:41,120
Speaker 3: the apartment. Oh my gosh. She is going out and

936
00:45:41,440 --> 00:45:46,719
Speaker 3: drinking and buying the Devil's lettuce to smoke, and they are.

937
00:45:46,760 --> 00:45:47,560
Speaker 4: Not and.

938
00:45:49,200 --> 00:45:53,040
Speaker 3: They are not quiet at all in the bedroom. I've

939
00:45:53,080 --> 00:45:55,480
Speaker 3: told her that the walls are thin and Aarin and

940
00:45:55,600 --> 00:45:59,680
Speaker 3: I can hear everything. So if you could, like maybe say, hey,

941
00:46:00,040 --> 00:46:02,400
Speaker 3: we're planning to have a little bit of fun, so

942
00:46:03,080 --> 00:46:06,439
Speaker 3: Aaron and I could have the opportunity to step out. Yeah,

943
00:46:06,719 --> 00:46:10,839
Speaker 3: I'd appreciate it, but nope, we do not ever get

944
00:46:10,880 --> 00:46:14,520
Speaker 3: a warning. In January of twenty twenty two, Aaron and

945
00:46:14,600 --> 00:46:19,359
Speaker 3: I have a chat. Okay, I assume that was a typo.

946
00:46:19,440 --> 00:46:21,680
Speaker 3: I think that was supposed to be twenty twenty three. Okay,

947
00:46:21,840 --> 00:46:25,480
Speaker 3: because we already have they were in June. Non linear

948
00:46:25,640 --> 00:46:29,040
Speaker 3: kind of. In January of twenty twenty two or twenty

949
00:46:29,080 --> 00:46:32,719
Speaker 3: twenty three, I assume, which is now another three months

950
00:46:32,960 --> 00:46:35,320
Speaker 3: into the future, Aaron and I have a chat and

951
00:46:35,400 --> 00:46:38,160
Speaker 3: come to a decision that we cannot afford another year

952
00:46:38,239 --> 00:46:41,919
Speaker 3: in this two bedroom apartment because we're paying for everything. Yeah,

953
00:46:42,040 --> 00:46:43,080
Speaker 3: because it makes sense.

954
00:46:43,160 --> 00:46:46,040
Speaker 5: They are handling all the finances, and the twins probably like, yeah,

955
00:46:46,080 --> 00:46:46,880
Speaker 5: cause I don't have to pay.

956
00:46:46,719 --> 00:46:49,200
Speaker 3: It look that much. Yeah, and technically on paper, she's

957
00:46:49,239 --> 00:46:51,000
Speaker 3: not responsible for it, so she can get away with it.

958
00:46:51,760 --> 00:46:55,760
Speaker 3: We're paying the monthly rent, the streaming services, food, toilet, paper,

959
00:46:55,920 --> 00:46:59,320
Speaker 3: Wi Fi. We have a sit down with Lauren and

960
00:46:59,440 --> 00:47:01,800
Speaker 3: let her know that in June we are not staying

961
00:47:01,840 --> 00:47:05,279
Speaker 3: in this apartment and plan to be moving. She gets

962
00:47:05,360 --> 00:47:08,360
Speaker 3: upset and says that she thought this was going to

963
00:47:08,400 --> 00:47:10,719
Speaker 3: be long term and that she's going through a hard

964
00:47:10,800 --> 00:47:15,160
Speaker 3: time with money. Huh not a new boyfriend. Yeah, find

965
00:47:15,200 --> 00:47:18,040
Speaker 3: the new boyfriend, yo, Hobo's not all hard. All you

966
00:47:18,040 --> 00:47:19,560
Speaker 3: gotta do is find a new boyfriend to move in

967
00:47:19,640 --> 00:47:23,279
Speaker 3: with and break up with. And the cycle continues. Ah.

968
00:47:25,640 --> 00:47:28,600
Speaker 3: We told her sorry, and maybe ask another friend to

969
00:47:28,760 --> 00:47:32,200
Speaker 3: roommate with them, you know, like you do when you

970
00:47:32,280 --> 00:47:35,160
Speaker 3: need to find a new place to live. So Aaron

971
00:47:35,200 --> 00:47:37,680
Speaker 3: and I moved out in April to our new one

972
00:47:37,719 --> 00:47:41,320
Speaker 3: bedroom apartment that we are currently in. Lauren moves in

973
00:47:41,440 --> 00:47:43,839
Speaker 3: with her boyfriend and in September of twenty twenty two,

974
00:47:44,000 --> 00:47:46,200
Speaker 3: they have a fight and he takes his stuff and

975
00:47:46,280 --> 00:47:50,520
Speaker 3: moves out. No way. Who would have thought. I had

976
00:47:50,600 --> 00:47:52,640
Speaker 3: no idea. I thought it was gonna work this time,

977
00:47:52,800 --> 00:47:54,960
Speaker 3: and the cycle continues.

978
00:47:55,800 --> 00:48:00,319
Speaker 5: I'm not against people moving in, it's just I at

979
00:48:00,440 --> 00:48:02,080
Speaker 5: least know them as a person.

980
00:48:03,040 --> 00:48:05,759
Speaker 3: Two years. You gotta know what you're getting into. Two

981
00:48:05,880 --> 00:48:09,600
Speaker 3: years minimum if you've if you've never lived with someone before. Yeah,

982
00:48:10,000 --> 00:48:11,239
Speaker 3: you know how long it took me to move in

983
00:48:11,360 --> 00:48:14,040
Speaker 3: with my brother and be okay with it? Your brother? Yes,

984
00:48:14,560 --> 00:48:17,640
Speaker 3: twenty one years. It's a long time. And I was like,

985
00:48:17,680 --> 00:48:20,520
Speaker 3: you know what, we should move in together? Okay? Yeah,

986
00:48:20,800 --> 00:48:23,480
Speaker 3: And he said, all right, I guess we can do that.

987
00:48:23,560 --> 00:48:24,640
Speaker 3: I guess we can do it. And then he did

988
00:48:25,040 --> 00:48:28,120
Speaker 3: and then he waited less time, and what happened? Like, guys,

989
00:48:28,320 --> 00:48:29,759
Speaker 3: we lived together for two years and do you guys

990
00:48:29,760 --> 00:48:30,440
Speaker 3: hate each other now?

991
00:48:31,440 --> 00:48:31,480
Speaker 2: No?

992
00:48:31,920 --> 00:48:39,120
Speaker 5: Beautiful at moments, but we're good now he's in the Chatwo,

993
00:48:39,719 --> 00:48:41,040
Speaker 5: I'm gonna see I, Fever responds.

994
00:48:43,320 --> 00:48:47,040
Speaker 3: So she's doing okay for a She is doing okay

995
00:48:47,160 --> 00:48:48,879
Speaker 3: for a while, and she has a really good job

996
00:48:49,280 --> 00:48:51,879
Speaker 3: and then a crazy story happens that I don't care

997
00:48:51,960 --> 00:48:54,120
Speaker 3: to tell because it has nothing to do with me,

998
00:48:54,760 --> 00:48:58,000
Speaker 3: but tell problem. Props on you for being like respectful

999
00:48:58,040 --> 00:49:00,800
Speaker 3: of other people's lives, but also I want to know

1000
00:49:00,920 --> 00:49:05,120
Speaker 3: what juicy stuff happened. Yeah, same, So she has to

1001
00:49:05,280 --> 00:49:07,920
Speaker 3: leave her good job and gets a job that doesn't

1002
00:49:07,960 --> 00:49:11,040
Speaker 3: pay as well. Lauren stopped paying her car insurance in

1003
00:49:11,080 --> 00:49:14,000
Speaker 3: October of twenty twenty three, and that is through our

1004
00:49:14,080 --> 00:49:16,640
Speaker 3: parents that they charge her one hundred dollars for every

1005
00:49:16,760 --> 00:49:19,520
Speaker 3: month she asks our parents for money because she can't

1006
00:49:19,560 --> 00:49:22,400
Speaker 3: afford her rent all by herself. Our parents tell her

1007
00:49:22,480 --> 00:49:25,480
Speaker 3: that she can move back. Our parents tell her that

1008
00:49:25,600 --> 00:49:28,360
Speaker 3: she can move back in with them so that she

1009
00:49:28,480 --> 00:49:32,040
Speaker 3: can be safe and be in a stable environment. But no,

1010
00:49:32,760 --> 00:49:36,160
Speaker 3: she wants her freedom. Oh well, you can't have freedom

1011
00:49:36,200 --> 00:49:41,160
Speaker 3: if you can't pay for it. Girl. She calls me

1012
00:49:41,280 --> 00:49:44,759
Speaker 3: in December twenty twenty three, crying and upset because she

1013
00:49:44,840 --> 00:49:50,520
Speaker 3: can't afford anything, and she has been hurting her Oh

1014
00:49:50,600 --> 00:49:52,239
Speaker 3: we had a little just a little dose. It's a

1015
00:49:52,239 --> 00:49:57,759
Speaker 3: little sprinkle of self harm there. Oh no, yeah. She

1016
00:49:57,920 --> 00:50:00,279
Speaker 3: calls me in December of twenty twenty three, crime and

1017
00:50:00,440 --> 00:50:04,000
Speaker 3: upset because she cannot afford anything, and she has been

1018
00:50:06,480 --> 00:50:08,880
Speaker 3: what do we do with that? She's been hurting herself?

1019
00:50:10,440 --> 00:50:14,200
Speaker 3: Should should I just say feeling hurt? Would that be

1020
00:50:14,480 --> 00:50:18,160
Speaker 3: boisling her? I don't want to delegitimize this person's experience. No.

1021
00:50:19,120 --> 00:50:25,560
Speaker 3: Maybe and going through thoughts of self harm? Yeah? No,

1022
00:50:25,719 --> 00:50:31,439
Speaker 3: not better, I'll say, been thinking about self harm? Yeah,

1023
00:50:31,520 --> 00:50:34,120
Speaker 3: that sounds. She calls me in December twenty twenty three,

1024
00:50:34,280 --> 00:50:37,560
Speaker 3: crying and upset because she cannot afford anything, and she

1025
00:50:37,800 --> 00:50:41,120
Speaker 3: has been thinking of self harm because no one wants

1026
00:50:41,200 --> 00:50:45,080
Speaker 3: to stay with her. N That's that's rough. That is

1027
00:50:45,160 --> 00:50:47,960
Speaker 3: really rough. That's I got no other words, but that's rough.

1028
00:50:49,160 --> 00:50:51,120
Speaker 3: I feel bad because it hurts my heart that she

1029
00:50:51,239 --> 00:50:53,520
Speaker 3: thinks that way. I talked to Aaron about it, and

1030
00:50:53,600 --> 00:50:55,960
Speaker 3: he says that she's only using me and that she's

1031
00:50:56,040 --> 00:50:59,719
Speaker 3: not going to pay us, just like last time. She

1032
00:50:59,840 --> 00:51:02,560
Speaker 3: may feel bad and sorry about her so so that

1033
00:51:02,640 --> 00:51:05,200
Speaker 3: I'll help her and I get Aaron to let her

1034
00:51:05,360 --> 00:51:09,520
Speaker 3: move in with us again. Oh boy, oh no, no, no,

1035
00:51:09,719 --> 00:51:13,080
Speaker 3: because I mean, look, it's your sister. It is your sister. Also,

1036
00:51:13,239 --> 00:51:16,440
Speaker 3: it's like, you know that she has her own she

1037
00:51:16,680 --> 00:51:23,080
Speaker 3: has not proven to be a good roommate. And I've

1038
00:51:23,160 --> 00:51:25,440
Speaker 3: lived with my brother like my own sibling before, and

1039
00:51:25,560 --> 00:51:26,680
Speaker 3: you do have like those.

1040
00:51:28,680 --> 00:51:30,399
Speaker 5: Like you know, I was the oldest, so I took

1041
00:51:30,440 --> 00:51:36,359
Speaker 5: initiative on like paying for rent, paying for the utility bills.

1042
00:51:36,400 --> 00:51:37,960
Speaker 5: He would send me money. It was all fine, but

1043
00:51:38,000 --> 00:51:40,080
Speaker 5: I took initiative on that because I'm the oldest. And

1044
00:51:40,120 --> 00:51:42,000
Speaker 5: then whenever I moved out, I kind of gave him

1045
00:51:42,040 --> 00:51:44,399
Speaker 5: that and he was learning on. He did a great job,

1046
00:51:44,719 --> 00:51:46,239
Speaker 5: but he was learning on, like I need to take

1047
00:51:46,239 --> 00:51:49,319
Speaker 5: that kind of responsibilities. In this case, the twin may

1048
00:51:49,400 --> 00:51:51,080
Speaker 5: not do that. And it's like, oh, it's just my twin,

1049
00:51:51,160 --> 00:51:53,160
Speaker 5: so she'll take care of me, right, It's like, yeah,

1050
00:51:53,200 --> 00:51:54,160
Speaker 5: she would, She's done it.

1051
00:51:54,280 --> 00:51:56,840
Speaker 3: Less past you know, she's my she's my you know

1052
00:51:57,120 --> 00:51:59,000
Speaker 3: where it's like, yeah, she would never let me like

1053
00:52:00,120 --> 00:52:02,480
Speaker 3: like hurt for money or whatever. Yeah, like she would

1054
00:52:02,520 --> 00:52:04,239
Speaker 3: never not take care of me. And then they're gonna

1055
00:52:04,239 --> 00:52:06,160
Speaker 3: get extra mad when she tries to lay down a

1056
00:52:06,200 --> 00:52:09,160
Speaker 3: boundary of like, hey, I want you to provide for yourself,

1057
00:52:09,600 --> 00:52:12,600
Speaker 3: she gonna be like, how could you do this to me? Exactly?

1058
00:52:12,800 --> 00:52:15,319
Speaker 3: And it's like our parents literally offered you a place

1059
00:52:15,400 --> 00:52:18,719
Speaker 3: to stay for free, to get your like your feet

1060
00:52:18,800 --> 00:52:19,279
Speaker 3: underneath you.

1061
00:52:19,440 --> 00:52:23,000
Speaker 5: So it's probably tom for you guys to like merge

1062
00:52:23,680 --> 00:52:26,120
Speaker 5: and to do your own things and not be dependent

1063
00:52:26,200 --> 00:52:29,439
Speaker 5: on a siblings. I mean it sounds like she wasn't

1064
00:52:29,719 --> 00:52:32,719
Speaker 5: like they've already lived not together, but you can just

1065
00:52:32,800 --> 00:52:34,680
Speaker 5: fall into that hole and then to that trap.

1066
00:52:34,960 --> 00:52:36,640
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean the timeline on this story has been

1067
00:52:36,719 --> 00:52:39,120
Speaker 3: like I think, like a couple of years at this point. Wow,

1068
00:52:40,080 --> 00:52:43,960
Speaker 3: so a lot a lot has happened. I convince Aaron

1069
00:52:44,000 --> 00:52:46,480
Speaker 3: to let her move in with us again. She has

1070
00:52:46,560 --> 00:52:51,680
Speaker 3: the bedroom and we live out in the living room area. WHOA, No,

1071
00:52:52,280 --> 00:52:55,680
Speaker 3: that is maybe taking it as step far out that

1072
00:52:56,000 --> 00:52:58,560
Speaker 3: that is too much. She needs to be in the

1073
00:52:58,600 --> 00:53:01,480
Speaker 3: living room, dude, get out of there. Oh my gosh.

1074
00:53:01,880 --> 00:53:05,200
Speaker 3: All we have are two desks with gaming pieces, and

1075
00:53:05,280 --> 00:53:08,120
Speaker 3: we couldn't fit it all into the bedroom. So I

1076
00:53:08,280 --> 00:53:10,279
Speaker 3: just thought it would make sense since we're always on

1077
00:53:10,360 --> 00:53:14,080
Speaker 3: the computers that l would have. So I just thought

1078
00:53:14,120 --> 00:53:16,560
Speaker 3: it would make sense since we're always on the computers

1079
00:53:16,600 --> 00:53:20,040
Speaker 3: that Lauren would have in the bedroom. Plus we all

1080
00:53:20,120 --> 00:53:23,320
Speaker 3: have cats. Lauren's cat doesn't get along with ours, and

1081
00:53:23,440 --> 00:53:26,440
Speaker 3: my two cats couldn't be locked away in a small bedroom.

1082
00:53:28,640 --> 00:53:34,160
Speaker 3: I wish that I listened to my wonderful boyfriend. Yea, yeah,

1083
00:53:35,160 --> 00:53:39,719
Speaker 3: Hindsights twenty twenty, isn't it. Yeah. I keep thinking that

1084
00:53:39,840 --> 00:53:43,040
Speaker 3: she's family and I should help that. I keep thinking

1085
00:53:43,160 --> 00:53:46,360
Speaker 3: she's family and I should help her. I want Lauren

1086
00:53:46,400 --> 00:53:48,520
Speaker 3: to be the person that she used to be before

1087
00:53:48,640 --> 00:53:50,960
Speaker 3: the alcohol and the vaporing. Oh so we got a

1088
00:53:51,000 --> 00:53:56,000
Speaker 3: little substance, little substance abuse going down. I can't help

1089
00:53:56,080 --> 00:53:59,040
Speaker 3: myself but to help her, and she keeps effing me over.

1090
00:53:59,160 --> 00:54:06,160
Speaker 5: In the end, dude, this lesson learned. Hopefully you will

1091
00:54:06,239 --> 00:54:09,560
Speaker 5: learn this lesson. But that's that's really tough. I still

1092
00:54:09,600 --> 00:54:11,560
Speaker 5: feel like you can have your gaming pecs and everything

1093
00:54:11,719 --> 00:54:13,839
Speaker 5: in the living room and ever stay in the living room,

1094
00:54:14,600 --> 00:54:15,200
Speaker 5: don't you agree.

1095
00:54:15,760 --> 00:54:18,200
Speaker 3: I guess she's just being extra courteous. That just sounds

1096
00:54:18,239 --> 00:54:22,759
Speaker 3: like how OP moves. Yeah, Op, Ope's like the host

1097
00:54:22,880 --> 00:54:25,360
Speaker 3: comes first or the guest. Yeah, my guest comes first.

1098
00:54:25,520 --> 00:54:28,920
Speaker 3: And in this context, she's trying to, you know, you know,

1099
00:54:29,080 --> 00:54:30,719
Speaker 3: give a spot to her twin.

1100
00:54:31,239 --> 00:54:31,439
Speaker 1: Huh.

1101
00:54:32,239 --> 00:54:35,279
Speaker 3: But it's like you got to, especially when people don't

1102
00:54:35,320 --> 00:54:38,080
Speaker 3: respect the things that you do for them, you need

1103
00:54:38,200 --> 00:54:42,600
Speaker 3: to prioritize your own over to someone else's. I don't

1104
00:54:42,640 --> 00:54:44,719
Speaker 3: think you've seen that, even in the context of like

1105
00:54:44,800 --> 00:54:48,640
Speaker 3: your twin, and it's like you've done this before. Off Op,

1106
00:54:48,840 --> 00:54:51,040
Speaker 3: I just i Ope. He's a sweetie. That's just what

1107
00:54:51,160 --> 00:54:51,719
Speaker 3: it comes down to.

1108
00:54:52,160 --> 00:54:53,239
Speaker 2: Yeah, and I and I.

1109
00:54:53,400 --> 00:54:56,319
Speaker 5: Feel that this sister is about to bring someone home soon.

1110
00:54:56,719 --> 00:54:58,239
Speaker 5: I feel that I feel that happening.

1111
00:54:58,239 --> 00:55:04,800
Speaker 3: And the cycle contain news. Okay. My current problem is

1112
00:55:04,880 --> 00:55:07,759
Speaker 3: that since she moved into this one bedroom apartment in

1113
00:55:07,880 --> 00:55:11,640
Speaker 3: December of twenty twenty three, she has caused fights between

1114
00:55:11,760 --> 00:55:16,200
Speaker 3: Aaron and me ooh oh, come on girl. In February

1115
00:55:16,320 --> 00:55:21,440
Speaker 3: twenty twenty three, she got I also assume that this

1116
00:55:21,560 --> 00:55:24,320
Speaker 3: is now twenty twenty four, probably I don't know. So

1117
00:55:24,640 --> 00:55:28,279
Speaker 3: in February of twenty twenty four, she got a new

1118
00:55:28,320 --> 00:55:31,000
Speaker 3: boyfriend and they come in and out of the apartment

1119
00:55:31,200 --> 00:55:33,680
Speaker 3: all day and night. She doesn't care if we're a

1120
00:55:33,719 --> 00:55:36,320
Speaker 3: sleep when they come in, high and giggling and opening

1121
00:55:36,360 --> 00:55:39,920
Speaker 3: and shutting the bedroom door and the bathroom door. Over time,

1122
00:55:40,000 --> 00:55:44,640
Speaker 3: the new boyfriend moves in not even asked or said anything.

1123
00:55:45,080 --> 00:55:50,200
Speaker 3: He's just here all the time. That is unacceptable. Oh

1124
00:55:50,280 --> 00:55:54,640
Speaker 3: my gosh. I have a similar situation happened to me

1125
00:55:55,040 --> 00:55:58,000
Speaker 3: in my early twenties, where it's like a roommate's boyfriend

1126
00:55:58,480 --> 00:56:02,160
Speaker 3: basically just became a little inn situation, and it was

1127
00:56:02,239 --> 00:56:05,720
Speaker 3: like nobody else in the apartment ever discussed real person

1128
00:56:05,840 --> 00:56:08,560
Speaker 3: living here with us then, and the other person basically

1129
00:56:08,680 --> 00:56:11,080
Speaker 3: just went, well, you're gonna have to deal with it.

1130
00:56:11,239 --> 00:56:13,520
Speaker 3: Oh wow, it was. It was kind of absurd. Huh.

1131
00:56:13,600 --> 00:56:16,440
Speaker 5: Well, I'm kind of afraid of that because Angie comes,

1132
00:56:16,600 --> 00:56:19,000
Speaker 5: she goes like on the weekends sometimes during the week

1133
00:56:19,520 --> 00:56:20,240
Speaker 5: and I don't want.

1134
00:56:20,440 --> 00:56:21,960
Speaker 3: Oh, I don't think. I don't think you have anything

1135
00:56:21,960 --> 00:56:24,080
Speaker 3: to worry about with that. Okay, okay, okay, of course not.

1136
00:56:24,360 --> 00:56:26,480
Speaker 3: She has her own home that she goes to and stuff. Well,

1137
00:56:26,600 --> 00:56:29,000
Speaker 3: until you put until you put everyone in the house

1138
00:56:29,360 --> 00:56:31,879
Speaker 3: in the living room, okay, and then bring her home

1139
00:56:32,040 --> 00:56:34,040
Speaker 3: every day. That's when I can wake everyone up in

1140
00:56:34,080 --> 00:56:35,640
Speaker 3: the middle of the night. Then that's when I should

1141
00:56:35,640 --> 00:56:41,320
Speaker 3: be concerned. That's when you should be worried. So you're good, okay, cool, Okay.

1142
00:56:42,040 --> 00:56:45,160
Speaker 3: We only ask Lauren to pay five hundred dollars for

1143
00:56:45,360 --> 00:56:48,560
Speaker 3: rent and bills. What's the real rent? What's the real rent?

1144
00:56:48,640 --> 00:56:52,600
Speaker 3: It's got to be close to two k uh. She

1145
00:56:52,760 --> 00:56:55,480
Speaker 3: hasn't been paying, and she lets this guy move in

1146
00:56:56,040 --> 00:56:59,640
Speaker 3: and he doesn't pay. Aaron and I are always fighting

1147
00:56:59,680 --> 00:57:01,640
Speaker 3: about the money that she owes us. Yet you need

1148
00:57:01,719 --> 00:57:04,120
Speaker 3: to get this woman out of your apartment. She is

1149
00:57:04,200 --> 00:57:07,000
Speaker 3: not a little girl. She is your twin sister who

1150
00:57:07,120 --> 00:57:09,560
Speaker 3: is a grown woman, and it needs to be able

1151
00:57:09,640 --> 00:57:12,560
Speaker 3: to provide for herself. Oh yeah, while not splitting up

1152
00:57:12,880 --> 00:57:16,120
Speaker 3: your relationship that you've had for years. At this point,

1153
00:57:16,280 --> 00:57:19,920
Speaker 3: five hundrellar rent and utilities. Come on, you can't pay that.

1154
00:57:20,240 --> 00:57:22,880
Speaker 3: Come on. Aaron and I are always fighting about the

1155
00:57:22,960 --> 00:57:25,320
Speaker 3: money that she owes us, her not moving out and

1156
00:57:25,440 --> 00:57:28,160
Speaker 3: not having space for anything that we want to better

1157
00:57:28,200 --> 00:57:31,640
Speaker 3: our lives. I keep telling myself that I can't hurt

1158
00:57:31,720 --> 00:57:34,120
Speaker 3: her or kick her out because she's my twin, and

1159
00:57:34,200 --> 00:57:38,440
Speaker 3: I would feel like crap, she can move in with

1160
00:57:38,560 --> 00:57:42,160
Speaker 3: the parents. She has not earned this freedom that she wants.

1161
00:57:42,680 --> 00:57:45,600
Speaker 3: She's stepping all over y'all so that she can have

1162
00:57:45,840 --> 00:57:49,640
Speaker 3: this freedom filled lifestyle that she doesn't even pay for.

1163
00:57:50,680 --> 00:57:53,160
Speaker 3: So we told Lauren and her boyfriend that we're getting

1164
00:57:53,200 --> 00:57:56,080
Speaker 3: a trailer and that if they can show us that

1165
00:57:56,160 --> 00:57:57,960
Speaker 3: they can pay rent and pay us the money that

1166
00:57:58,080 --> 00:58:01,280
Speaker 3: she owes, that they can come with. Oh, which is

1167
00:58:01,720 --> 00:58:04,880
Speaker 3: even more generous than you need to be, like you

1168
00:58:04,920 --> 00:58:07,000
Speaker 3: should be, like you owe us this money, and by

1169
00:58:07,040 --> 00:58:11,600
Speaker 3: the way, find another place to live. In time, they

1170
00:58:11,680 --> 00:58:15,680
Speaker 3: started paying us money, life is going well, and then

1171
00:58:16,360 --> 00:58:20,360
Speaker 3: boom they break up at the end of September. What

1172
00:58:21,160 --> 00:58:26,560
Speaker 3: end the cycle continue? What I thought that I thought

1173
00:58:26,600 --> 00:58:29,520
Speaker 3: that that was gonna work out. So I think, and

1174
00:58:29,800 --> 00:58:33,320
Speaker 3: I think this puts us in September of twenty twenty four. Okay,

1175
00:58:33,920 --> 00:58:37,480
Speaker 3: you can join us live on YouTube every weekday at

1176
00:58:37,640 --> 00:58:42,160
Speaker 3: three pm PST. Just tap our profile. You're in easy

1177
00:58:42,360 --> 00:58:43,960
Speaker 3: and we do have a little bit left, but let's

1178
00:58:44,000 --> 00:58:47,800
Speaker 3: discuss where we're at. So I think, clearly, clearly you

1179
00:58:47,920 --> 00:58:51,360
Speaker 3: need to the twin sister needs to be let out

1180
00:58:51,400 --> 00:58:54,520
Speaker 3: of this, like nest like she's not at home, but

1181
00:58:54,640 --> 00:58:58,320
Speaker 3: it's like she's just using you. Yeah, oh yeah, And

1182
00:58:58,440 --> 00:59:01,880
Speaker 3: I pray that you some of these Reddit comments and

1183
00:59:01,960 --> 00:59:04,600
Speaker 3: get your head back in gear because because a boyfriend's

1184
00:59:04,600 --> 00:59:06,480
Speaker 3: probably making a lot of good points, you're like, oh,

1185
00:59:06,560 --> 00:59:09,160
Speaker 3: it's family, can't do it. Then you get backed up

1186
00:59:09,200 --> 00:59:11,400
Speaker 3: by the write of comments. Yeah, you'll probably listen then,

1187
00:59:11,960 --> 00:59:14,400
Speaker 3: But I mean it's a hard thing to overcome for sure,

1188
00:59:14,640 --> 00:59:16,760
Speaker 3: being like but it's my family. It's like, yeah, it's

1189
00:59:16,880 --> 00:59:19,960
Speaker 3: really hard to argue through that wall. It once it's

1190
00:59:20,080 --> 00:59:23,240
Speaker 3: up and you've decided like I can't you know, I

1191
00:59:23,320 --> 00:59:25,080
Speaker 3: can't go against mapallah.

1192
00:59:24,840 --> 00:59:28,120
Speaker 5: Yeah and and but yeah, not to say she was

1193
00:59:28,880 --> 00:59:32,600
Speaker 5: manipulating op, but the sister was having some thoughts about

1194
00:59:32,640 --> 00:59:35,080
Speaker 5: doing things to herself and maybe in.

1195
00:59:35,160 --> 00:59:37,360
Speaker 3: A way could round about way, could have maybe guilt

1196
00:59:37,400 --> 00:59:41,040
Speaker 3: tripped her this way. It doesn't sound like that's an

1197
00:59:41,120 --> 00:59:43,960
Speaker 3: absurd thing to think based on all of the behavior

1198
00:59:44,120 --> 00:59:46,720
Speaker 3: that has been described in this post. Yeah, I just

1199
00:59:47,080 --> 00:59:47,400
Speaker 3: I don't know.

1200
00:59:47,720 --> 00:59:50,480
Speaker 5: I keep a watch out on all the manipulative, manipual

1201
00:59:50,520 --> 00:59:52,560
Speaker 5: if tactics or like things that she's doing to make

1202
00:59:52,600 --> 00:59:53,440
Speaker 5: me feel bad about this.

1203
00:59:53,880 --> 00:59:55,800
Speaker 3: Like I'm and I'm sorry. I don't want to talk

1204
00:59:55,880 --> 00:59:59,760
Speaker 3: down on anybody's pay grade, right, but if you're paying

1205
01:00:00,080 --> 01:00:03,560
Speaker 3: five hundred dollars for rent and which by the way,

1206
01:00:03,680 --> 01:00:06,680
Speaker 3: and you've they've kicked themselves out into the living room

1207
01:00:07,080 --> 01:00:10,000
Speaker 3: by choice to give you the bedroom, and then you

1208
01:00:10,120 --> 01:00:12,160
Speaker 3: can't come up with five hundred bucks a month for

1209
01:00:12,240 --> 01:00:17,800
Speaker 3: rent and utilities, that's a decision you're choosing to do that. Yeah,

1210
01:00:20,160 --> 01:00:23,200
Speaker 3: just kind of degenerate behavior there. Let's finish this off.

1211
01:00:23,280 --> 01:00:25,960
Speaker 3: I hope it ends with her being released from the

1212
01:00:26,000 --> 01:00:30,800
Speaker 3: living situation here. She is not paying us back still

1213
01:00:31,480 --> 01:00:35,400
Speaker 3: from what she owes go figure, Aaron wants me to

1214
01:00:35,520 --> 01:00:38,040
Speaker 3: drop her because she is not a positive person. She

1215
01:00:38,160 --> 01:00:41,120
Speaker 3: posts on Snapchat and Facebook that she's sad and doesn't

1216
01:00:41,160 --> 01:00:43,959
Speaker 3: want to talk to anyone, posts videos of her crying

1217
01:00:44,040 --> 01:00:47,280
Speaker 3: for attention. She's always giving me issues that she doesn't

1218
01:00:47,280 --> 01:00:49,440
Speaker 3: have money to pay me back. She'll walk in the

1219
01:00:49,480 --> 01:00:52,360
Speaker 3: apartment with fast food and Dutch Bros. Coffee in her

1220
01:00:52,440 --> 01:00:55,919
Speaker 3: hands almost every day. Ah don't we all know someone

1221
01:00:56,080 --> 01:00:59,040
Speaker 3: like this? Every time she leaves the apartment, she has

1222
01:00:59,120 --> 01:01:02,200
Speaker 3: to get coffee. I get it, I love coffee, but

1223
01:01:02,360 --> 01:01:05,000
Speaker 3: I brew coffee at home, and I can make pumpkin

1224
01:01:05,080 --> 01:01:09,720
Speaker 3: spice lattes here. Anyways, I need advice and I need

1225
01:01:09,800 --> 01:01:11,680
Speaker 3: to know what I be the a hole to kick

1226
01:01:11,840 --> 01:01:16,400
Speaker 3: my twin out. I think the answer is resounding no,

1227
01:01:18,360 --> 01:01:20,720
Speaker 3: you would not be the a hole in that situation.

1228
01:01:21,600 --> 01:01:24,160
Speaker 3: And honestly, from the sound of it, sounds like your

1229
01:01:24,160 --> 01:01:25,880
Speaker 3: sister would benefit from a little therapy.

1230
01:01:26,000 --> 01:01:26,360
Speaker 2: There we go.

1231
01:01:26,920 --> 01:01:30,680
Speaker 3: And responsibilities, Yes, she needs her own responsibilities, but I

1232
01:01:30,680 --> 01:01:32,840
Speaker 3: don't think she's at a point right now. I think

1233
01:01:32,920 --> 01:01:38,320
Speaker 3: right now she conflates responsibility with like being a personally

1234
01:01:38,440 --> 01:01:41,680
Speaker 3: attacked where it's like, how dare you tell me I

1235
01:01:41,760 --> 01:01:43,760
Speaker 3: need to be able to live on my own? You're

1236
01:01:43,800 --> 01:01:48,000
Speaker 3: attacking me. It's like, that's the world you live in

1237
01:01:48,400 --> 01:01:48,720
Speaker 3: right now?

1238
01:01:48,880 --> 01:01:52,600
Speaker 5: She should draw some trying. Yeah, she should try to try. No,

1239
01:01:52,800 --> 01:01:56,680
Speaker 5: she should try to act like an adult. Try this

1240
01:01:56,760 --> 01:01:57,560
Speaker 5: new thing called trying.

1241
01:01:57,960 --> 01:02:00,400
Speaker 3: If you if you are not able to to make

1242
01:02:00,560 --> 01:02:03,560
Speaker 3: five hundred bucks rent and utilities per month, it's you

1243
01:02:03,680 --> 01:02:06,320
Speaker 3: gotta go home. Yeah, you gotta go home and figure

1244
01:02:06,360 --> 01:02:09,200
Speaker 3: it out. You gotta get your feet underneath you. You

1245
01:02:09,320 --> 01:02:13,600
Speaker 3: can pay that with any normal job, even a part

1246
01:02:13,680 --> 01:02:17,040
Speaker 3: time job like twenty hours a week, you could pay

1247
01:02:17,120 --> 01:02:20,280
Speaker 3: five hundred bucks a month easy, like, so it is.

1248
01:02:20,360 --> 01:02:23,160
Speaker 3: She She's probably just unemployed that whole time too, who knows.

1249
01:02:23,240 --> 01:02:25,640
Speaker 3: But how she got the money for fast food? Who knows.

1250
01:02:26,040 --> 01:02:28,000
Speaker 3: I just hope she's not living with you anymore. OPI

1251
01:02:28,600 --> 01:02:31,520
Speaker 3: my family gas lit me after hanging out with my

1252
01:02:31,680 --> 01:02:36,200
Speaker 3: toxic X, so I decided to cut them off. You

1253
01:02:36,240 --> 01:02:39,080
Speaker 3: should probably cut them all off. Yeah. Sometimes, Hey, if

1254
01:02:39,120 --> 01:02:41,680
Speaker 3: you got an extra gas line, you gotta cut that

1255
01:02:41,800 --> 01:02:45,880
Speaker 3: gas line off, dude and explode. Dumb background. In January

1256
01:02:45,960 --> 01:02:48,640
Speaker 3: of this year, I thirty one female, broke off my

1257
01:02:48,760 --> 01:02:52,880
Speaker 3: five year relationship and we were engaged. Without going into

1258
01:02:52,920 --> 01:02:55,520
Speaker 3: too much detail, there was a lot of emotional abuse,

1259
01:02:55,640 --> 01:02:59,520
Speaker 3: substance abuse, and a neglect. It was an excruciating decision

1260
01:02:59,560 --> 01:03:01,800
Speaker 3: to make, but after two years of essentially living his

1261
01:03:01,960 --> 01:03:05,920
Speaker 3: roommates and continuously feeling beat down, I left. Good for you,

1262
01:03:06,040 --> 01:03:08,920
Speaker 3: os Big. I had to live with him thirty four

1263
01:03:09,000 --> 01:03:11,320
Speaker 3: mal for three more months after that until I could

1264
01:03:11,360 --> 01:03:14,160
Speaker 3: move into my duplex because we were evicting a tenant

1265
01:03:14,200 --> 01:03:16,960
Speaker 3: and it took way longer than expected. Got it?

1266
01:03:17,360 --> 01:03:17,480
Speaker 4: Uh?

1267
01:03:17,880 --> 01:03:20,240
Speaker 3: This by the way, this comes from user Kyla the

1268
01:03:20,440 --> 01:03:23,080
Speaker 3: gym rat on the r slash okay storytimes I read it.

1269
01:03:23,600 --> 01:03:23,640
Speaker 4: So.

1270
01:03:25,240 --> 01:03:27,480
Speaker 3: I have always been close to my brother and they

1271
01:03:27,520 --> 01:03:29,800
Speaker 3: have a two year old baby girl that I love

1272
01:03:29,880 --> 01:03:33,120
Speaker 3: with my whole heart. After I officially moved out, I

1273
01:03:33,240 --> 01:03:36,320
Speaker 3: really got to start the healing process. I met someone

1274
01:03:36,560 --> 01:03:40,480
Speaker 3: and it's been going amazing. Let's go, Let's go. My

1275
01:03:40,680 --> 01:03:44,240
Speaker 3: parents slash friends love him and he's so consistent and

1276
01:03:44,560 --> 01:03:45,240
Speaker 3: sweet to me.

1277
01:03:46,120 --> 01:03:46,360
Speaker 4: Ah.

1278
01:03:47,640 --> 01:03:50,320
Speaker 3: After I got my security deposit back from my ex,

1279
01:03:50,640 --> 01:03:52,520
Speaker 3: I told him that I was seeing someone. And this

1280
01:03:52,680 --> 01:03:55,400
Speaker 3: is late August. There was an issue with the checks,

1281
01:03:55,440 --> 01:03:57,760
Speaker 3: so it took forever to get my deposit back. This

1282
01:03:57,920 --> 01:04:00,320
Speaker 3: conversation was fine. I told him I was going to

1283
01:04:00,360 --> 01:04:02,920
Speaker 3: block him for a clean cut and move on, and

1284
01:04:03,040 --> 01:04:05,520
Speaker 3: he agreed that that was the best. I texted my

1285
01:04:05,720 --> 01:04:08,400
Speaker 3: sister in law and told her that I finally blocked

1286
01:04:08,480 --> 01:04:11,240
Speaker 3: him and that it's still stung really bad. I talked

1287
01:04:11,240 --> 01:04:13,360
Speaker 3: to this person every day for over five years, and

1288
01:04:13,520 --> 01:04:17,200
Speaker 3: it's a big step. Within twenty four hours, I'm flipping

1289
01:04:17,240 --> 01:04:20,440
Speaker 3: through my Instagram stories and she posts a picture of

1290
01:04:20,520 --> 01:04:23,640
Speaker 3: a horse at a rodeo with him tagged, and the

1291
01:04:23,760 --> 01:04:26,240
Speaker 3: next picture is my niece with him in the background.

1292
01:04:26,880 --> 01:04:30,160
Speaker 3: So naturally I was like, what is going on? Why

1293
01:04:30,240 --> 01:04:33,440
Speaker 3: are you with him to be met with? You have

1294
01:04:33,640 --> 01:04:36,560
Speaker 3: someone to spend your saturdays with and he has no

1295
01:04:36,680 --> 01:04:39,440
Speaker 3: one up here. He's from a different state. Okay, So

1296
01:04:39,560 --> 01:04:43,560
Speaker 3: in one fell swoop, she diminished my new relationship and

1297
01:04:43,920 --> 01:04:46,520
Speaker 3: has sympathy for the person who I wanted to spend

1298
01:04:46,640 --> 01:04:51,600
Speaker 3: every Saturday with, but severely mistreated me. They couldn't possibly

1299
01:04:51,680 --> 01:04:55,400
Speaker 3: understand why I would be upset, and I mean probably

1300
01:04:55,440 --> 01:04:59,320
Speaker 3: because they're brother and sister and they're not dating. Fast

1301
01:04:59,320 --> 01:05:02,320
Speaker 3: forward three months months, I distanced myself, spent a lot

1302
01:05:02,360 --> 01:05:07,200
Speaker 3: of time actually healing and enjoying my relationship and cultivating friendships.

1303
01:05:07,560 --> 01:05:10,280
Speaker 3: Work is thriving, and I'm back hitting my fitness calls.

1304
01:05:10,320 --> 01:05:12,880
Speaker 3: So it sounds like chop dude, sounds like three months later,

1305
01:05:13,240 --> 01:05:16,080
Speaker 3: you're a new person who were winning. Hadn't talked to

1306
01:05:16,160 --> 01:05:18,520
Speaker 3: them at all, and it was very peaceful. They didn't

1307
01:05:18,520 --> 01:05:21,080
Speaker 3: reach out once and I was surprised, and that's whatever.

1308
01:05:21,240 --> 01:05:23,800
Speaker 3: I mean, you were going for the clean break. Yeah,

1309
01:05:24,280 --> 01:05:26,640
Speaker 3: I don't know why. You're surprised and you're thriving, so

1310
01:05:26,720 --> 01:05:30,720
Speaker 3: everything's cool. I extended an olive branch to say, I'm

1311
01:05:30,840 --> 01:05:34,280
Speaker 3: still not okay with this, but I was gonna stop

1312
01:05:34,400 --> 01:05:38,640
Speaker 3: dwelling because I miss my precious baby niece. Okay, so

1313
01:05:38,960 --> 01:05:41,200
Speaker 3: trying to be like, hey, I still am not really

1314
01:05:41,240 --> 01:05:43,200
Speaker 3: cool with you, but I'd love to see my niece. Yeah,

1315
01:05:43,320 --> 01:05:46,560
Speaker 3: make peace. My brother took over a week to respond

1316
01:05:46,800 --> 01:05:49,560
Speaker 3: and say, hey, I've been meaning to reply to your

1317
01:05:49,600 --> 01:05:52,560
Speaker 3: text to my wife. You're always welcome in our baby's

1318
01:05:52,600 --> 01:05:54,720
Speaker 3: life and you always have been, but you were the

1319
01:05:54,760 --> 01:05:56,680
Speaker 3: one who chose to step away for as long as

1320
01:05:56,720 --> 01:05:59,960
Speaker 3: you did over a picture on Instagram. We will continue

1321
01:06:00,160 --> 01:06:03,200
Speaker 3: to have a relationship with your ex and understand you

1322
01:06:03,280 --> 01:06:05,480
Speaker 3: don't want to see or hear anything about it, But

1323
01:06:05,600 --> 01:06:07,680
Speaker 3: in the same turn, we don't want to hear about

1324
01:06:07,720 --> 01:06:10,240
Speaker 3: how you're doing with the breakup or anything related to

1325
01:06:10,320 --> 01:06:15,760
Speaker 3: your relationship with your ex either. Hmm. Okay. I told them,

1326
01:06:15,840 --> 01:06:18,320
Speaker 3: I acknowledged that they would probably keep in touch after

1327
01:06:18,440 --> 01:06:20,680
Speaker 3: knowing each other for five years, but for them to

1328
01:06:20,800 --> 01:06:24,400
Speaker 3: hang out and put it in my face felt very intentional,

1329
01:06:24,640 --> 01:06:28,200
Speaker 3: especially because she posted it within twenty four hours of

1330
01:06:28,360 --> 01:06:33,240
Speaker 3: telling me of me, within twenty four hours of me

1331
01:06:33,440 --> 01:06:36,040
Speaker 3: telling her he's blocked and I don't want to see

1332
01:06:36,080 --> 01:06:36,960
Speaker 3: what he has going on.

1333
01:06:37,800 --> 01:06:44,240
Speaker 5: Weird, So it seems that the X has manipulated a

1334
01:06:44,360 --> 01:06:48,520
Speaker 5: story told the brother and sister in law, and they

1335
01:06:48,600 --> 01:06:51,720
Speaker 5: feel sorry for him, and that's why they're hanging out.

1336
01:06:51,720 --> 01:06:52,840
Speaker 5: I don't know if you want to hang out with

1337
01:06:53,000 --> 01:06:55,280
Speaker 5: she broke up with me because of XYZ, because whatever

1338
01:06:55,320 --> 01:06:56,080
Speaker 5: news you're told.

1339
01:06:55,920 --> 01:07:00,200
Speaker 3: First is what you're gonna believe. Yeah, I think it's

1340
01:07:00,720 --> 01:07:03,360
Speaker 3: I think everyone kind of sucks so far. Oh yeahes

1341
01:07:03,880 --> 01:07:07,560
Speaker 3: where it's like you can't really demand that people stop

1342
01:07:07,640 --> 01:07:10,640
Speaker 3: paying out with someone else, that they have a completely

1343
01:07:10,760 --> 01:07:14,920
Speaker 3: interperson like a relationship separate from your thing, just because

1344
01:07:15,120 --> 01:07:17,880
Speaker 3: of whatever you have going on with them. And it

1345
01:07:18,000 --> 01:07:22,400
Speaker 3: also does suck for them to be like, oh, by

1346
01:07:22,440 --> 01:07:25,200
Speaker 3: the way, we have more sympathy for him than you.

1347
01:07:26,600 --> 01:07:31,880
Speaker 3: But this is why relationships and relationships get messy. Real message,

1348
01:07:31,920 --> 01:07:35,640
Speaker 3: they can get a little messy. I responded upset, and

1349
01:07:35,760 --> 01:07:37,560
Speaker 3: I let them know I was hurt and was so

1350
01:07:37,760 --> 01:07:40,320
Speaker 3: confused why they couldn't try to see it from my perspective,

1351
01:07:40,800 --> 01:07:44,320
Speaker 3: also just how disappointed that I was with them. They

1352
01:07:44,400 --> 01:07:48,040
Speaker 3: responded with Kayla, there's so much we'd like to say

1353
01:07:48,080 --> 01:07:51,800
Speaker 3: to you in response to your purposefully hurtful and malicious text,

1354
01:07:52,440 --> 01:07:54,880
Speaker 3: but at this point We're becoming concerned about your mental

1355
01:07:54,920 --> 01:07:58,000
Speaker 3: health and question whether you are confusing reality with your

1356
01:07:58,080 --> 01:08:01,320
Speaker 3: own version of it that you've created within your mind.

1357
01:08:01,800 --> 01:08:02,120
Speaker 1: Hmmm.

1358
01:08:02,640 --> 01:08:06,000
Speaker 3: We hope you seek serious psychiatric help, as it's clear

1359
01:08:06,080 --> 01:08:09,160
Speaker 3: you are not well, as evidenced time and time again

1360
01:08:09,280 --> 01:08:13,800
Speaker 3: throughout the past year in your behavior, paranoia, and increasively

1361
01:08:14,760 --> 01:08:19,240
Speaker 3: and increasingly explosive and reactive response. It interesting, isn't this

1362
01:08:19,320 --> 01:08:22,080
Speaker 3: the same person who didn't respond for three months? Yea,

1363
01:08:22,280 --> 01:08:25,600
Speaker 3: that doesn't sound That doesn't line up, dude, Until you

1364
01:08:25,720 --> 01:08:27,960
Speaker 3: take the time and space to heal yourself and come

1365
01:08:28,040 --> 01:08:30,720
Speaker 3: back to reality, we wish you the best, but respectfully

1366
01:08:30,800 --> 01:08:33,080
Speaker 3: must take a step back from our relationship with you

1367
01:08:33,560 --> 01:08:36,000
Speaker 3: in hopes that one day we will be able to

1368
01:08:36,080 --> 01:08:39,320
Speaker 3: move forward. The brother said this, Yeah, this is all

1369
01:08:39,439 --> 01:08:45,400
Speaker 3: extremely extra the toxic excess manipulated a story. Yeah, or

1370
01:08:45,640 --> 01:08:47,479
Speaker 3: we have an unreliable narrator.

1371
01:08:47,960 --> 01:08:48,519
Speaker 2: Could be both.

1372
01:08:48,560 --> 01:08:51,439
Speaker 3: Who knows. We only know what we're given. Yeah, but

1373
01:08:51,640 --> 01:08:54,960
Speaker 3: I think in that three month shut down period some

1374
01:08:55,200 --> 01:08:58,760
Speaker 3: stories were intricately woven. Oh yeah, on the other side

1375
01:08:58,760 --> 01:09:03,080
Speaker 3: of the fence that you are not privy too. Yeah,

1376
01:09:04,080 --> 01:09:09,599
Speaker 3: because it's so crazy to the flip flop flip flop

1377
01:09:09,680 --> 01:09:12,559
Speaker 3: in that text message is nuts, being like you are

1378
01:09:12,840 --> 01:09:15,679
Speaker 3: increasingly explosive and it's like they didn't speak for months,

1379
01:09:15,800 --> 01:09:21,360
Speaker 3: months and months. The gas lighting and trying to convince

1380
01:09:21,479 --> 01:09:24,519
Speaker 3: me I'm crazy even though I'm the one who hasn't

1381
01:09:24,560 --> 01:09:27,639
Speaker 3: talked to them for three months is crazy.

1382
01:09:27,960 --> 01:09:28,200
Speaker 4: Yeah.

1383
01:09:28,760 --> 01:09:30,920
Speaker 3: I've always known my sister in law for having to

1384
01:09:31,000 --> 01:09:33,720
Speaker 3: be right and never being able to be empathetic in

1385
01:09:33,880 --> 01:09:36,640
Speaker 3: any way. Also, she would always try to get in

1386
01:09:36,720 --> 01:09:39,120
Speaker 3: my head about my ex and point things out throughout

1387
01:09:39,240 --> 01:09:43,519
Speaker 3: our relationship to upset me. But it's never gonna upset us.

1388
01:09:44,160 --> 01:09:47,360
Speaker 3: If you join us live on YouTube every weekday at

1389
01:09:47,400 --> 01:09:51,160
Speaker 3: three pm PST, just tap on our profile tip ta. Yeah,

1390
01:09:51,760 --> 01:09:54,479
Speaker 3: there is a little bit more relevant information here, But

1391
01:09:54,800 --> 01:09:55,800
Speaker 3: let's tie think you.

1392
01:09:55,840 --> 01:09:58,879
Speaker 5: Should take a step back from them. And I understand

1393
01:09:58,880 --> 01:10:01,439
Speaker 5: you're going to miss your niece. It's they're not seeing

1394
01:10:01,520 --> 01:10:06,160
Speaker 5: reality and if they're around your toxic eggs, I don't know.

1395
01:10:06,560 --> 01:10:09,320
Speaker 3: Yeah, I had influences. It seems pretty cut and dry

1396
01:10:09,479 --> 01:10:13,240
Speaker 3: that they have been manipulated by the X because if

1397
01:10:13,280 --> 01:10:15,920
Speaker 3: you haven't spoken to them for three months, Yeah, how

1398
01:10:15,960 --> 01:10:18,800
Speaker 3: would they know about what's real and what's not. So

1399
01:10:18,920 --> 01:10:22,160
Speaker 3: it sounds like they've just chosen a side and chose

1400
01:10:22,280 --> 01:10:26,080
Speaker 3: the x's perspective on things, because how would they even

1401
01:10:26,200 --> 01:10:30,439
Speaker 3: know yours. You haven't spoken for three months. Yeah, like

1402
01:10:30,520 --> 01:10:33,840
Speaker 3: you need from that before we talk to you. Yeah,

1403
01:10:33,920 --> 01:10:36,559
Speaker 3: they're just getting fed from the X to Yeah. Well,

1404
01:10:36,840 --> 01:10:41,040
Speaker 3: hopefully everything is settled in this final We'll see you.

1405
01:10:41,720 --> 01:10:44,720
Speaker 3: I doubt it. Just cut You have every right to

1406
01:10:44,720 --> 01:10:48,120
Speaker 3: cut these people out. So her maid of honor stopped

1407
01:10:48,240 --> 01:10:50,960
Speaker 3: talking to her after she went through a painful breakup,

1408
01:10:51,280 --> 01:10:53,840
Speaker 3: and my sister in law basically said to get over it.

1409
01:10:54,439 --> 01:10:57,360
Speaker 3: So I said, I see why she walked out of

1410
01:10:57,479 --> 01:11:00,760
Speaker 3: your life after a painful breakup. The way they can't

1411
01:11:00,760 --> 01:11:03,080
Speaker 3: take accountability for their behavior and then go to my

1412
01:11:03,240 --> 01:11:07,480
Speaker 3: parents saying how concerned they are about me is insane.

1413
01:11:08,040 --> 01:11:10,680
Speaker 3: So I'm making the decision to not attend to holidays.

1414
01:11:11,160 --> 01:11:14,120
Speaker 3: My best friend's family welcomed me with open arms like

1415
01:11:14,200 --> 01:11:16,560
Speaker 3: they have for the past fourteen years. Nice and have

1416
01:11:16,680 --> 01:11:18,599
Speaker 3: been better to me than my actual blood.

1417
01:11:18,840 --> 01:11:19,040
Speaker 4: Wow.

1418
01:11:19,200 --> 01:11:21,320
Speaker 3: Mom cried when I told her that I wouldn't be

1419
01:11:21,439 --> 01:11:24,439
Speaker 3: there Christmas. I think my new man and I are

1420
01:11:24,520 --> 01:11:28,160
Speaker 3: going somewhere tropical. I'm going to start our own traditions. Nice.

1421
01:11:28,760 --> 01:11:31,080
Speaker 3: I love my niece, but I can't take the gas

1422
01:11:31,200 --> 01:11:34,599
Speaker 3: lighting and manipulation for trying to explain why my feelings

1423
01:11:34,640 --> 01:11:37,280
Speaker 3: were hurt, to have them continue to think how they

1424
01:11:37,360 --> 01:11:39,920
Speaker 3: act and what they said was okay. Yeah, am I

1425
01:11:40,040 --> 01:11:42,200
Speaker 3: the a hole for cutting them off and thinking she

1426
01:11:42,400 --> 01:11:46,720
Speaker 3: posted him on purpose for me to see? So he

1427
01:11:47,800 --> 01:11:50,879
Speaker 3: I don't know about the posting part. You can definitely

1428
01:11:51,120 --> 01:11:53,720
Speaker 3: count yourself on the first one. I will say that

1429
01:11:54,080 --> 01:12:01,320
Speaker 3: cutting off the two offenders definitely not the a hole. However,

1430
01:12:02,479 --> 01:12:06,320
Speaker 3: by letting this dynamic with your brother and his sister

1431
01:12:06,360 --> 01:12:10,000
Speaker 3: and your sister in law and his wife, by letting

1432
01:12:10,040 --> 01:12:13,040
Speaker 3: the dynamic between you two affect others in the family

1433
01:12:13,160 --> 01:12:15,360
Speaker 3: that have nothing to do with this, I think it

1434
01:12:15,479 --> 01:12:18,560
Speaker 3: does kind of become an a whole move. Yeah, Like,

1435
01:12:18,880 --> 01:12:22,400
Speaker 3: I think it's fine not that family sided with the brother.

1436
01:12:23,160 --> 01:12:26,240
Speaker 3: I don't think that we've gotten confirmation on that, and

1437
01:12:26,280 --> 01:12:29,439
Speaker 3: I think it's just been they've kind of approached the

1438
01:12:29,520 --> 01:12:32,759
Speaker 3: family and been like, we're concerned about oh PE's behavior

1439
01:12:33,280 --> 01:12:35,880
Speaker 3: because maybe because of X, Y and Z. But a

1440
01:12:35,960 --> 01:12:38,160
Speaker 3: great way to get in front of that is to

1441
01:12:38,360 --> 01:12:41,120
Speaker 3: have a discussion with those people in your family instead

1442
01:12:41,120 --> 01:12:47,960
Speaker 3: of just also just completely just completely dropping out of

1443
01:12:48,080 --> 01:12:51,439
Speaker 3: family gatherings, Like I wouldn't go out of my way

1444
01:12:51,560 --> 01:12:55,200
Speaker 3: to interact with these two. But I think just because

1445
01:12:55,200 --> 01:12:57,759
Speaker 3: they're going to be like at Christmas, like that doesn't

1446
01:12:57,800 --> 01:13:00,360
Speaker 3: mean that you should cut yourself out of that. Yeah,

1447
01:13:00,439 --> 01:13:04,040
Speaker 3: because of you. And it's you're letting them from my

1448
01:13:04,400 --> 01:13:07,920
Speaker 3: in my perspective, like that's letting them win. Yeah, And

1449
01:13:08,000 --> 01:13:10,880
Speaker 3: I don't know if that's maybe like toxic, but like

1450
01:13:11,479 --> 01:13:13,840
Speaker 3: maybe I'm just the like I put things in the

1451
01:13:13,960 --> 01:13:18,240
Speaker 3: context of like a competition, but it's like I wouldn't

1452
01:13:18,280 --> 01:13:20,680
Speaker 3: let these people push me out of the family, like

1453
01:13:22,120 --> 01:13:27,040
Speaker 3: over some nonsense, Like you know, that's what that's like.

1454
01:13:27,360 --> 01:13:30,040
Speaker 3: They don't deserve to have the power in this situation. Yeah,

1455
01:13:30,880 --> 01:13:33,400
Speaker 3: you're letting them win. Yeah, not to make it a

1456
01:13:33,439 --> 01:13:35,880
Speaker 3: win or lose thing, but that's just what it feels like. Yeah,

1457
01:13:36,600 --> 01:13:41,519
Speaker 3: So I would say, yeah, maybe don't cut off your

1458
01:13:41,520 --> 01:13:45,960
Speaker 3: whole family. Definitely go no contact with these folks, and

1459
01:13:46,000 --> 01:13:47,599
Speaker 3: then think about, great it'll be you get to see

1460
01:13:47,640 --> 01:13:50,360
Speaker 3: the niece at Christmas and you can interact with the

1461
01:13:50,439 --> 01:13:55,720
Speaker 3: niece and not her whack parents. Yeah. Cool, So think

1462
01:13:55,760 --> 01:13:56,080
Speaker 3: about it.

1463
01:13:56,360 --> 01:13:59,160
Speaker 5: Think about it and that's the end of that episode.

1464
01:14:00,920 --> 01:14:03,599
Speaker 5: If you love us, make sure to subscribe. We love

1465
01:14:03,720 --> 01:14:05,600
Speaker 5: you and see you tomorrow.