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Speaker 1: Hi. This is Laura Vandercamp. I'm a mother of five,

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Speaker 1: an author, journalist, and speaker. And this is Sarah Hartunger.

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Speaker 1: I'm a mother of three, a practicing physician and blogger.

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Speaker 1: On the side, we are two working parents who love

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Speaker 1: our careers and our families. Welcome to best of both worlds.

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Speaker 1: Here we talk about how real women manage work, family,

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Speaker 1: and time for fun, from figuring out childcare to mapping

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Speaker 1: out long term career goals. We want you to get

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Speaker 1: the most out of life. Welcome to best of both worlds.

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Speaker 1: This is Laura. This is episode two hundred and sixty two,

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Speaker 1: which is airing in early August of twenty twenty two.

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Speaker 1: We are going to be talking about body image and Sarah,

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Speaker 1: you particularly wanted to cover this topic because you had

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Speaker 1: blogged about this not too long ago. Can you can

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Speaker 1: you talk about that a little bit? Yeah, I wanted to,

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Speaker 1: I'd blogged about it. I don't know if I was

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Speaker 1: the one who thought we should podcast about it, but

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Speaker 1: I think it is a nice idea. Anytime a blog

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Speaker 1: post gets a lot of comments and a lot of

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Speaker 1: conversation in the comments, it usually means it's something that's

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Speaker 1: relevant to a lot of people and has some interesting aspects,

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Speaker 1: So yes, I think it should hopefully translate. Well, I

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Speaker 1: guess we should open with a little bit of a

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Speaker 1: trigger warning that this episode does talk about body image,

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Speaker 1: not really specific weights or anything, but weight in general

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Speaker 1: and exercise and things like that. So if listening to

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Speaker 1: something with those types of topics would bother you, you

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Speaker 1: just might want to skip this one. Yeah, come back

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Speaker 1: next week we'll be talking about something completely different. Why

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Speaker 1: don't you talk a little bit about what your blog

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Speaker 1: posts said? Yeah, because I mean it's like, I just

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Speaker 1: throw out body image. I'm like, well so what so

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Speaker 1: what was the angle that had people chiming in? Yeah?

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Speaker 1: And I mean, it is an incredibly broad topic and

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Speaker 1: there are many valid angles with which one could take it.

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Speaker 1: But my angle, the title of my post was diet culture,

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Speaker 1: the patriarchy, and real life. And that is because I

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Speaker 1: think I'm just realizing that some of what I feel

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Speaker 1: benefits me in the way I think about body image

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Speaker 1: goes a little bit against what is trendy in terms

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Speaker 1: of the body acceptance movements. And I'll even go so

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Speaker 1: far as to say that in some circles or channels

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Speaker 1: it starts to feel like if you put any intentional

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Speaker 1: thought into, you know, doing nutrition a certain way or

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Speaker 1: exercise a certain way with one of the goals being

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Speaker 1: to look a certain way, then you are bowing to

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Speaker 1: the patriarchy and you kind of suck just yet, and

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Speaker 1: yet I find that in my life when I do

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Speaker 1: put in the effort and kind of in an intentional way,

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Speaker 1: in a way that keeps me on the lower end

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Speaker 1: of my happier weight range, I enjoy my life more

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Speaker 1: and I'm far less distracted by the topics of weight

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Speaker 1: and body image, which is kind of the opposite because

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Speaker 1: what I think you're some of your I love your

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Speaker 1: counterpoint to this, because like the idea that like some

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Speaker 1: women are wasting their lives because they're distracted about body image.

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Speaker 1: But I find that, like if I just kind of

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Speaker 1: like do the stuff that keeps me in a happy place,

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Speaker 1: I'm not distracted versus the other way around, if that

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Speaker 1: makes sense. Yeah, And what she's talking to you know,

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Speaker 1: I I'm perfectly fine with Sarah doing whatever she wants

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Speaker 1: to do in her life, and everything she's doing is

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Speaker 1: healthy and normal, and so we're not talking about, like,

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Speaker 1: you know, excess of dieting or you know, over the

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Speaker 1: top exercising or anything that would be you know, representing

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Speaker 1: some unhealthy choices in that regard, and there are certainly

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Speaker 1: people who do, and so that's an entirely separate line

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Speaker 1: of work. I think my general perspective is, you know,

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Speaker 1: from the time view of this, which is that I

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Speaker 1: know that a lot of women do spend a lot

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Speaker 1: of their precious time obsessing about how they look. And

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Speaker 1: I do find that bothersome. I mean, partly because we

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Speaker 1: only have so much time and there's so many other

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Speaker 1: things we could be doing with it. And also just

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Speaker 1: because our bodies are functional. They are not decorative objects

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Speaker 1: for other people to see and judge. If they are

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Speaker 1: approaching your body as something to see and judge, that

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Speaker 1: is on them. It is not what you exist in

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Speaker 1: the world. I'm not you specifically, but people exist in

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Speaker 1: the world to do right. We are not here for

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Speaker 1: other people to look out and judge. We're here to

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Speaker 1: you know, use our bodies as the tools to take

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Speaker 1: us through life. And so I mean that doesn't mean

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Speaker 1: that I think people should engage in unhealthy behaviors or activities,

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Speaker 1: you know, sitting around on the couch twenty four hours

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Speaker 1: a day wouldn't be supporting all that our bodies can do.

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Speaker 1: I feel like one of the great reasons for women,

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Speaker 1: particularly to take up sports or other intense physical activities

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Speaker 1: that they find fun is that you increase, like you do,

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Speaker 1: see your body as a functional object and not about

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Speaker 1: how it looks right, And so you start eating to

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Speaker 1: fuel it to do these intense physical things as opposed

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Speaker 1: to you know, how do I eat, what does it

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Speaker 1: make me look like? Or you know, I want to

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Speaker 1: develop these muscles because it's going to help me climb

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Speaker 1: that mountain better, as opposed to I want to do

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Speaker 1: this because it makes me, you know, look good in

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Speaker 1: my clothes. So that's just you know, how I would

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Speaker 1: hope people would approach body image from and just sort

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Speaker 1: of what our bodies can do. And I also think

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Speaker 1: it's you know, it's an important topic because some people

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Speaker 1: have bodies that are just never going to be traditionally skinny.

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Speaker 1: I mean, it's just genetically what they are. That's what,

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Speaker 1: you know, what their genetic inheritance is. It doesn't matter

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Speaker 1: what they do, like I mean, short of a famine,

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Speaker 1: it's not going to be anything close to the traditional

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Speaker 1: skinny look. But just about everybody can be healthier and

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Speaker 1: active and eating food that fuels them for the things

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Speaker 1: they need to do, and moving the bodies and ways

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Speaker 1: that they are physically capable of doing. So that's just

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Speaker 1: you know how I'm hoping to see things. Yeah, that's interesting.

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Speaker 1: Somebody in our patreon we kind of opened up this

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Speaker 1: topic to see if people wanted to weigh in on

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Speaker 1: this pun not really into Yes, someone who is a

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Speaker 1: pretty serious runner mentioned that she actually tends to run

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Speaker 1: much better when she pays a lot of attention to

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Speaker 1: fueling and that often includes eating a good amount of

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Speaker 1: carbs that, if anything, drives her weight and fluid retention

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Speaker 1: up a little bigger than she would prefer. But for

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Speaker 1: the sake of like how she can perform from a

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Speaker 1: fitness standpoint and from a sports standpoint, that she finds

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Speaker 1: that very much worth it. And I think that's an

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Speaker 1: interesting perspective. And yet, when you said something about you know,

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Speaker 1: strength training in order to like be strong, I'm like,

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Speaker 1: but wait, can't you strength train to be strong? And well,

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Speaker 1: I mean that when you strength tree. Yeah, the upside

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Speaker 1: of you know, doing intense physical activities, I would say

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Speaker 1: you you often look better and better from that persone,

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Speaker 1: but you care less and less right, as you know,

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Speaker 1: the way those two interact with each other can actually

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Speaker 1: be a pretty cool virtuous cycle as opposed to the

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Speaker 1: vicious cycle that some people wind up in. Yeah, no,

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Speaker 1: it's true. I mean the I've read a lot of

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Speaker 1: you know, running related articles about that that, you know,

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Speaker 1: especially when the low carbon craze was a big thing

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Speaker 1: ten fifteen years ago. That yes, okay, maybe you lose

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Speaker 1: weight on it, but like your energy levels are kind

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Speaker 1: of a lot lower for things like distance running, which

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Speaker 1: does actually require glycogen I guess. So it's yeah, no, interesting,

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Speaker 1: But why don't we go through and talk a little

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Speaker 1: bit about sort of, you know, your body image journey.

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Speaker 1: We can both talk about this, but since you were

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Speaker 1: the one who started with the blog post, why don't

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Speaker 1: you go ahead and talk a little bit about that. Sure?

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Speaker 1: I mean, as I put a disclaimer in my notes

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Speaker 1: to you, I was like, I'm certainly not a poster

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Speaker 1: child for body accept which is probably why I come

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Speaker 1: at it from this angle. And I've never been like

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Speaker 1: overweight from a numbers perspective, but I'm only five foot

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Speaker 1: one and it makes a huge difference to me whether

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Speaker 1: I'm like within a ten pound range, at the top

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Speaker 1: of that range or at the bottom of that range.

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Speaker 1: And honestly, that's probably a range that I've been conscious

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Speaker 1: of ever since high school. And I'm similar in size

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Speaker 1: now to what I was then. I've always done sports.

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Speaker 1: I mean the sports that I did were more like

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Speaker 1: competitive cheerleading. I wasn't like a you know, coordinated ball

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Speaker 1: sports type of an athlete, but I was. I've always

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Speaker 1: been active. I've always run, I've always gone to the gym,

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Speaker 1: like I really enjoy activity. But I guess to me,

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Speaker 1: I've just always been conscious of that range, and I

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Speaker 1: have found that, for better or for worse, a lot

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Speaker 1: of the more unhappy periods of my life are associated

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Speaker 1: with the higher end of that range in my mind,

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Speaker 1: and a lot of the happier periods are on the

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Speaker 1: lower end. And I don't know where the causality arrows

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Speaker 1: go there, Whether it's just like when I'm happy, I'm

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Speaker 1: engage and behaviors that you know, I'm eating better or

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Speaker 1: like just taking better care of myself, or whether it's

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Speaker 1: like I do think there's like a little bit of

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Speaker 1: an aspect. Again, I'm sure like one could name the

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Speaker 1: patriarch or other influence on influences on me that just like,

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Speaker 1: I don't really enjoy living in my body as much

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Speaker 1: when it's at the top of that range, even if

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Speaker 1: technically on paper it's not unhealthy, and the bottom is

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Speaker 1: not unhealthy either, by the way, like I've never strived

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Speaker 1: to be, you know, underweight or anything like that. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: let's say I have not been in the same ten

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Speaker 1: pound range my whole life. It has. It has gone

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Speaker 1: up and down a bit more than I'm not cutting pregnancy,

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Speaker 1: by the way, obviously I gain more than ten pounds,

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Speaker 1: but that one would hope, one would definitely hope. But yeah,

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Speaker 1: I mean I it was a certain weight in high school,

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Speaker 1: though that was up and down a bit in high

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Speaker 1: school too, sort of higher at the end than it

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Speaker 1: was at the in the middle of it. Then I

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Speaker 1: got back down to that weight, you know, when I

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Speaker 1: was training for a marathon and nursing a baby simultaneously,

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Speaker 1: and it was one of those periods of life which

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Speaker 1: was you know, I could I could eat anything, it

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Speaker 1: didn't keep me full for more than like forty five

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Speaker 1: minutes in between, you know, exclusively nursing a baby and

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Speaker 1: running all those miles to tramp for a marathon. There

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Speaker 1: needed to be a lot of fuel in my body,

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Speaker 1: and I was still losing weight doing it. So you know,

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Speaker 1: I got down there and then, you know whatever, I

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Speaker 1: stopped doing both those things and you know, ate normally

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Speaker 1: and it kind of went back up, as one might imagine. Then,

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Speaker 1: after having Alex in twenty fifteen, I decided to try

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Speaker 1: out the low carb bandwagon, and you know, sure enough

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Speaker 1: it worked in the sense that I lost weight. I

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Speaker 1: again got down to the mid high school weight, which

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Speaker 1: was an interesting experience, but I hated it, like I

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Speaker 1: hated what it required, Like I don't want to eat

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Speaker 1: that way. You know, It's just like I like bread.

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Speaker 1: I like you know, a good craft beer. I like,

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Speaker 1: you know, just eating normally too, and being able to

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Speaker 1: participate in sort of communal food experiences, you know, food experience,

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Speaker 1: food as a pleasurable fuel for your body. So anyway,

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Speaker 1: I stopped, and as one might imagine, the way came

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Speaker 1: back on and you know, as it does. So curiously,

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Speaker 1: we didn't unpack the scale when moving here, so it

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Speaker 1: has been sitting in my closet for six months and

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Speaker 1: I just pulled it out now to take a look,

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Speaker 1: and you know, my weight was about the same as

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Speaker 1: it was before, which is kind of interesting since I

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Speaker 1: know that for six months I have been moving significantly

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Speaker 1: more than I was in the six months prior to that.

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Speaker 1: I could see that through my step counter on my phone,

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Speaker 1: So it's I mean, at least an additional mile plus

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Speaker 1: per day in terms of just general steps walking around.

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Speaker 1: I have completely cut out all dairy products, not for

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Speaker 1: any sort of vanity, but as it turns out, you know,

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Speaker 1: I have trouble eating them without severe pain, and so

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Speaker 1: it turns out that pain is a far more immediate

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Speaker 1: motivator than anything in terms of diet for losing weight

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Speaker 1: or something like that. But the net result is that

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Speaker 1: I can't eat a lot of the stuff that might

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Speaker 1: be perceived as a junk. I mean, if you look

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Speaker 1: on the ingredient list of a lot of candy and uh,

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Speaker 1: you know, snack food, milk is in there. If you

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Speaker 1: you know, there's a layer of cheese on every single

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Speaker 1: fast food item out there, like there's just peata you eat. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: So it's just I would assume that from not eating

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Speaker 1: all that stuff, which I would certainly have eaten in

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Speaker 1: the past, you know, shouldn't that make me lose weight?

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Speaker 1: But it doesn't, right, And so my takeaway from this

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Speaker 1: is that if I was going to lose weight, it

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Speaker 1: would require a significant amount of effort, which is incredibly

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Speaker 1: low on my priority list right now. So I wait

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Speaker 1: more than I do in high school, and I guess

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Speaker 1: my current feeling is I just don't really care. Let's

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Speaker 1: take a quick ad break on that note, and we

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Speaker 1: will be back in just a minute with more on

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Speaker 1: body image. Well, we are back talking all things body image.

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Speaker 1: So Sarah, you know this led to some interesting you know,

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Speaker 1: you want to keep your weight a certain range, and

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Speaker 1: you know on the lower side you're a rather thin person.

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Speaker 1: But that led to some issues and when you were

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Speaker 1: trying to start a family, right, I wonder if you

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Speaker 1: can talk about that. Yeah, I mean that's definitely where

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Speaker 1: things have been more difficult. And honestly, I also feel

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Speaker 1: like the medical world and the science world doesn't do

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Speaker 1: this issue enough justice. Like there's this thought that as

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Speaker 1: long as your BMI is technically normal, you really shouldn't

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Speaker 1: have any problems having you know, ovulation, and that weight

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Speaker 1: shouldn't be an issue unless you're, like, you know, extremely

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Speaker 1: thin BMI have seventeen like model territory. For me, that

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Speaker 1: did not turn out to be the case. And as

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Speaker 1: I did struggle with infertility for over two years, I

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Speaker 1: met others who were in a very similar boat. I

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Speaker 1: am actually still in touch with several of them, and

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Speaker 1: it's so interesting. All of our journeys are very similar

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Speaker 1: in that most of us basically had to eventually really

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Speaker 1: ramp down exercise and gain a little bit of weight

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Speaker 1: that we didn't particularly want to, and then with or

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Speaker 1: without medication or fertility assistance, we all got pregnant. And then, interestingly,

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Speaker 1: and this has been true for me and a few others,

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Speaker 1: after that first pregnancy, something happens and well, maybe it's

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Speaker 1: just that we don't have time to exercise as much.

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Speaker 1: It's certainly possible, but the fergility was mostly primary, like

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Speaker 1: it was mostly that first baby or something about like

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Speaker 1: coming off of the pill and being able for that

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Speaker 1: hypothylamic access to ramp back up. But I know it

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Speaker 1: wasn't just me, And yet I know that, like when

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Speaker 1: I asked the reproductive endo in the beginning, she's like, no,

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Speaker 1: you're fine, Like cause on paper I was that we

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Speaker 1: were in that malogical eighteen to twenty five range, like

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Speaker 1: all should be fine correctly, so you should be fine.

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Speaker 1: Why would I tell you to exercise less? Exercise is healthy.

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Speaker 1: Why would I tell you to gain weight? You're at

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Speaker 1: a healthy weight. OBC is such a problem, right anyway,

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Speaker 1: So that that was tough, and honestly, like one of

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Speaker 1: the lowest points of my life was that infertility period.

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Speaker 1: I hated gaining the weight. I hated not running. I

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Speaker 1: felt like there was a mental health problem, not problem,

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Speaker 1: but like mental health consequence of like running being my

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Speaker 1: stress relief and then not being able to do it

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Speaker 1: at a time that was very stressful. And you know,

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Speaker 1: it has a happy ending. Eventually I got pregnant, and

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Speaker 1: thankfully I never really had to deal with those issues

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Speaker 1: with my subsequent pregnancies, and so that was complicated. And

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Speaker 1: then the other area where things had become complicated for

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Speaker 1: me isn't really weight really but more exercise related. And

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Speaker 1: that is that you guys know, if you're a longtime

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Speaker 1: listener that like, pumping is my least favorite thing. I

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Speaker 1: struggle with it. Pump. I have great supply when my

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Speaker 1: kids are nursing, but once I put that pump on,

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Speaker 1: like every single time, no matter what kinds of heroic

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Speaker 1: efforts I took like six times a day pump like crazy,

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Speaker 1: crazy efforts. It was just a struggle to make enough,

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Speaker 1: and my babies never seemed super happy with what I

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Speaker 1: could make, and I always wondered like I usually was

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Speaker 1: running by that point, because it really did help my

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Speaker 1: mental health, and postpartum time is a very stressful time,

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Speaker 1: and there was probably an aspect of like, I want

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Speaker 1: to look the way I look before. I just want

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Speaker 1: to feel like myself. And yet that's like another layer

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Speaker 1: of guilt because if you're not quite pumping enough and

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Speaker 1: you think there's any chance that that could have anything

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Speaker 1: to do with it, you're like, well, I'm also a

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Speaker 1: terrible person because I'm like putting my needs ahead of

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Speaker 1: my poor starving baby. And by the way, that's like

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Speaker 1: hilarious because we've seen pictures of any of my children

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Speaker 1: as babies, none of them appeared to be starving. I mean,

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Speaker 1: I know poor waking can be an issue with some babies,

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Speaker 1: but it was it with mine, and so I don't know,

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Speaker 1: it was just like I'm very really I don't have

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Speaker 1: an answer just to say that, like, if you've gone

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Speaker 1: through this, it does suck, and that it is nice

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Speaker 1: to be very much beyond that and feel like whatever

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Speaker 1: I feel like doing with my own body is only

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Speaker 1: affecting me at this point, although as we'll talk about, like,

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Speaker 1: I also want to be really, really careful in terms

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Speaker 1: of making sure my kids grow up with healthy body image.

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Speaker 1: So I guess it just changes. I guess the just

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Speaker 1: the requirements and the implications change. Now. I wonder if

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Speaker 1: you could. I mean, because I asked you the question of, like,

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Speaker 1: why is that your happy weight? Right? Like? And I

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Speaker 1: mean because you know, I guess if as I'm hearing this,

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Speaker 1: I'm like, well, if it's a weight, you couldn't conceive that,

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Speaker 1: and you wanted to conceive what makes it a happy weight?

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Speaker 1: Right or well I was able to conceive at it

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Speaker 1: with camera engining, so I just couldn't the first time

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Speaker 1: for whatever reason. And also it is hard to know if,

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Speaker 1: like how much of that was how much I was running,

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Speaker 1: So it's hard to separate those two things out because

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Speaker 1: I addressed them both at the same time. So who knows.

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Speaker 1: Maybe I could have stayed the exact same way and

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Speaker 1: just ran less. But like, at that point, I was

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Speaker 1: so ready to have a baby, I did whatever the

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Speaker 1: nutrition has told me, whatever anybody would would tell me,

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Speaker 1: and it worked. Why I mean, as I wrote back

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Speaker 1: to I was like the patriarchy. I don't know. It's

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Speaker 1: just how I feel comfortable. And it's how I've felt

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Speaker 1: comfortable for my entire life, high school, college and beyond. Again,

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Speaker 1: like you know, I guess I don't have a reason

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Speaker 1: for you except for like vanity, and it's just how

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Speaker 1: I feel my best. Yeah, no, it's it's fascinating. I'm

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Speaker 1: very curious about it. Like if it was something about,

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Speaker 1: you know, how clothes fit, or how it feels when

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Speaker 1: you're moving around, or you know how people look at you.

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Speaker 1: I don't know. I mean, because it's not your husband,

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Speaker 1: like like, let's put it out here right now. It's

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Speaker 1: not It's not like Josh is like you need to

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Speaker 1: be a certain way. Oh yeah, sure, that's clearly never never, ever, ever,

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Speaker 1: And in fact, I've never been in any like even

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Speaker 1: younger me was never in a relationship where that was

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Speaker 1: a thing. There is some just sort of eating in

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Speaker 1: my family, so who knows if their influence is there,

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Speaker 1: but yeah, no, this is and again, like I'm totally normal,

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Speaker 1: like I just care about being on the lower end

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Speaker 1: of normal versus the higher end of normal. For me,

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Speaker 1: it makes a difference. And I hope that's not going

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Speaker 1: to upset people. And I'm glad you have your perspective

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Speaker 1: to like provide a much needed counterpoint that, hey, you

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Speaker 1: can be happy and also not care so much. I

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Speaker 1: think that's awesome. Well, and you you are not an

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Speaker 1: extremist in anything. I mean you you moderate on stuff

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Speaker 1: like you I mean, meals with you, No, I love

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Speaker 1: I love food. I mean, we'll get into our little

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Speaker 1: food section. But well, that's the other thing. I'll have

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Speaker 1: to say. My genetics tend towards the thinner side anyway, both,

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Speaker 1: you know, Like, so it's not like I have to

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Speaker 1: go to heroic lengths like I always feel like when

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Speaker 1: I have to go to almost like heroic lengths to

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Speaker 1: like be on, like I have to eat really bad

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Speaker 1: or like what I perceive is really bad to to

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Speaker 1: get out of my happy range. So I still eat

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Speaker 1: everything I don't like. We'll talk about our food section,

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Speaker 1: but yeah, no, I don't want to live in a

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Speaker 1: life where I I mean, I'm so sorry for your

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Speaker 1: dairy freeness, but like I want to be able to

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Speaker 1: eat pizza like that's very important to me. Yeah, well,

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Speaker 1: which is where our transition to eating because honestly, I

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Speaker 1: got to say, I mean trying to eat this way,

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Speaker 1: not again, not vanity, It's about not having physical pain.

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Speaker 1: It takes as much energy as I can devote to

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Speaker 1: any of this, right, like between you know, work and

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Speaker 1: managing five kids in the household, it's like there's not

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Speaker 1: a whole extra pot of mental energy to deal with stuff, right,

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Speaker 1: and so every single bit of that that is on

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Speaker 1: the food front is focused on not eating what's going

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Speaker 1: to trigger the pain. And so it's Uh, I have

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Speaker 1: so much sympathy for people who have to eat, you know,

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Speaker 1: for allergies or anything like that, because it's hard. It's

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Speaker 1: really hard. I can control a lot of it at home,

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Speaker 1: and you know, my husband does the grocery shopping, who

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Speaker 1: knows certain things to buy that you know, I can

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Speaker 1: then eat and snack and not feel like I'm completely

401
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Speaker 1: starving when there's nothing in the house that I can eat.

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Speaker 1: But but just like traveling, like going to an airport,

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Speaker 1: you know, like what do you eat? Everything has cheese

404
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Speaker 1: on it? Like, look at it. Sometimes everything has cheese

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Speaker 1: on it. I had to you know, learn like what

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Speaker 1: are the fast food restaurants I can go to? I

407
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Speaker 1: could go to, you know, Panda Express. Like it turns

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Speaker 1: out that Asian food like does not feature cheese. So

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Speaker 1: that's a good exciting thing to know about. So I've

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Speaker 1: I've become you know, eat a lot more Asian fast

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Speaker 1: food in various forms. But yeah, it's it's not a

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Speaker 1: fun way to eat, which is why I'm always wondering, like,

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Speaker 1: because I can see the amount of mental energy it

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Speaker 1: takes for that. So the people who are doing say

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Speaker 1: low carb to lose weight and trying to do this

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Speaker 1: over the long haulisay, you know, it just seems like

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Speaker 1: it would be a lot of mental energy, and so

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Speaker 1: you know, that's where I'm always wondering, Like how much

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Speaker 1: time women do put into this sort of thing. I

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Speaker 1: wonder if someone figures out a certain eating pattern that

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Speaker 1: really works for them long term, maybe the energy lessons

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Speaker 1: at some point, because you're just like I eat the

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Speaker 1: same things all the time and they're this like, yeah,

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Speaker 1: I think about my patients who are Celiac, and they

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Speaker 1: like absolutely can't have gluten and it's always so hard

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Speaker 1: for them in the beginning and the families talk all

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Speaker 1: about it, and then like a year or two in

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Speaker 1: I hear them just being like, yeah, we're used to it,

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Speaker 1: Like yeah, although dairy is really tough, because it really

430
00:22:34,280 --> 00:22:36,800
Speaker 1: is and truly everything. And I feel like gluten free

431
00:22:36,840 --> 00:22:39,360
Speaker 1: has become a more popular offering at a lot of restaurants,

432
00:22:39,400 --> 00:22:41,600
Speaker 1: but I don't necessarily see dairy free on a lot

433
00:22:41,600 --> 00:22:43,560
Speaker 1: of menus. So I can see. It's so funny because

434
00:22:43,560 --> 00:22:45,480
Speaker 1: we went out to eat, like the weekend before. That's

435
00:22:45,520 --> 00:22:47,600
Speaker 1: my husband and I and we are at a fancy

436
00:22:47,600 --> 00:22:49,760
Speaker 1: place and on the restaurant, yeah, they the menu, they

437
00:22:49,760 --> 00:22:52,000
Speaker 1: had GF next to a bunch of different stuff, and

438
00:22:52,000 --> 00:22:54,159
Speaker 1: I'm like, well, where's your DF, Like I can't have

439
00:22:54,200 --> 00:22:57,080
Speaker 1: your DAF on here? But they didn't, I guess, which

440
00:22:57,080 --> 00:23:00,760
Speaker 1: is funny because you know, I am genetically of the

441
00:23:00,840 --> 00:23:03,600
Speaker 1: stock of people who should be able to consume it

442
00:23:03,640 --> 00:23:06,240
Speaker 1: with no problem, but a lot of I mean the

443
00:23:06,240 --> 00:23:09,199
Speaker 1: reason like Asian cuisine doesn't have cheese, is it? You know,

444
00:23:09,400 --> 00:23:11,879
Speaker 1: historically it's not been something that many people have eaten

445
00:23:11,880 --> 00:23:14,600
Speaker 1: and a lot of people can't digest it, and and

446
00:23:14,680 --> 00:23:18,360
Speaker 1: so you know, it's and several other you know, ethnicities

447
00:23:18,400 --> 00:23:22,000
Speaker 1: as well as sort of genetically. Most people cannot they

448
00:23:22,040 --> 00:23:24,439
Speaker 1: have the trouble with the lactose, which isn't My problem

449
00:23:24,480 --> 00:23:27,240
Speaker 1: is something else entirely. But there's a lot of people

450
00:23:27,840 --> 00:23:30,159
Speaker 1: who aren't going to eat dairy or people who are

451
00:23:30,440 --> 00:23:34,560
Speaker 1: you know, observant, you know, kosher cuisine like you you know,

452
00:23:34,640 --> 00:23:36,239
Speaker 1: you have to separate out meat and dairy. So if

453
00:23:36,280 --> 00:23:39,000
Speaker 1: you are eating meat, you you can't have the cheeseburger, right,

454
00:23:39,040 --> 00:23:40,919
Speaker 1: you have the burger but not the cheese on it.

455
00:23:41,000 --> 00:23:43,880
Speaker 1: Or But there's just a lot of people who would

456
00:23:43,920 --> 00:23:45,639
Speaker 1: be eating this way. So it's kind of curious that

457
00:23:46,119 --> 00:23:48,840
Speaker 1: there's certainly a lot more now, but you know that

458
00:23:48,840 --> 00:23:52,680
Speaker 1: there hasn't been historically is kind of crazy. You would

459
00:23:52,720 --> 00:23:56,320
Speaker 1: have enjoyed my kids summer camp, Yes, that's true. Although

460
00:23:56,359 --> 00:23:58,120
Speaker 1: what did they have the meat days in the milk

461
00:23:58,160 --> 00:24:01,119
Speaker 1: days or did they just do I think so? I

462
00:24:01,160 --> 00:24:03,280
Speaker 1: don't know. I didn't delve into a lot of details,

463
00:24:03,280 --> 00:24:05,320
Speaker 1: but yeah, it sounded like the kids preferred the milk

464
00:24:05,359 --> 00:24:09,879
Speaker 1: days over the exactly. How about you? Why don't you

465
00:24:09,880 --> 00:24:13,000
Speaker 1: talk a little bit about how you eat? Yeah, well,

466
00:24:13,040 --> 00:24:15,879
Speaker 1: I was going to bring up Gretchen Rubins framework of

467
00:24:16,080 --> 00:24:19,119
Speaker 1: moderator versus abstainer because I find it very interesting, and

468
00:24:19,200 --> 00:24:22,520
Speaker 1: also because I think there is for those who follow

469
00:24:22,560 --> 00:24:24,639
Speaker 1: her stuff, there is a thought that people who are

470
00:24:24,800 --> 00:24:27,960
Speaker 1: upholders must then also be abstainers because they like things

471
00:24:27,960 --> 00:24:29,480
Speaker 1: in like very black and white, and they like to

472
00:24:29,520 --> 00:24:32,359
Speaker 1: follow guidelines and rules. But I will tell you like,

473
00:24:32,440 --> 00:24:36,440
Speaker 1: I'm definitely a textbook upholder in pretty much most regard,

474
00:24:36,480 --> 00:24:38,880
Speaker 1: but I am also a full on moderator, Like, don't

475
00:24:38,920 --> 00:24:41,840
Speaker 1: tell me I can't eat something, like I will just

476
00:24:42,200 --> 00:24:45,520
Speaker 1: want to eat that particular thing again unless it was

477
00:24:45,520 --> 00:24:50,359
Speaker 1: like a medically indicated kind of an issue. I really

478
00:24:50,440 --> 00:24:52,320
Speaker 1: am the kind of person. I guess. She uses the

479
00:24:52,359 --> 00:24:54,359
Speaker 1: example like could you keep chocolate around and like not

480
00:24:54,400 --> 00:24:56,600
Speaker 1: eat it? I'm like, of course, because like I do

481
00:24:56,680 --> 00:24:59,320
Speaker 1: keep chocolate around, and why would I eat it all?

482
00:24:59,359 --> 00:25:00,919
Speaker 1: Like I'll have some today and I'll have like a

483
00:25:00,920 --> 00:25:05,119
Speaker 1: little tomorrow, like I don't. Yeah, so definitely moderator. I

484
00:25:05,160 --> 00:25:07,280
Speaker 1: pretty much eat everything I did have one year of

485
00:25:07,320 --> 00:25:10,399
Speaker 1: attempting Paleo. I think I was just convinced of all

486
00:25:10,440 --> 00:25:14,080
Speaker 1: these magical benefits. I liked the food. I actually think

487
00:25:14,119 --> 00:25:17,639
Speaker 1: Paleo cuisine is like delicious because it's just very like

488
00:25:17,760 --> 00:25:21,320
Speaker 1: pure and it's very high fat. In many cases, I

489
00:25:21,400 --> 00:25:24,359
Speaker 1: like fat, and I don't know, like it worked pretty

490
00:25:24,359 --> 00:25:26,560
Speaker 1: well for that year, and then I just got tired.

491
00:25:26,560 --> 00:25:28,159
Speaker 1: I went on a trip to North Carolina and was like,

492
00:25:28,240 --> 00:25:30,960
Speaker 1: I have to eat biscuits because I really really miss biscuits.

493
00:25:31,280 --> 00:25:32,639
Speaker 1: And I did, and then I was like why was

494
00:25:32,680 --> 00:25:35,120
Speaker 1: I doing this? So I quit. I really enjoy just

495
00:25:35,280 --> 00:25:37,680
Speaker 1: eating everything. I don't eat tons of sugar on a

496
00:25:37,720 --> 00:25:40,359
Speaker 1: regular basis, but like, if I want something specific with sugar,

497
00:25:40,440 --> 00:25:43,280
Speaker 1: I'm absolutely gonna get it. My current favorite thing is

498
00:25:43,400 --> 00:25:47,080
Speaker 1: dairy Queen blizzards. It's not very high brown, but they're

499
00:25:47,200 --> 00:25:50,760
Speaker 1: really really good. Yeah, so I guess that's all to

500
00:25:50,840 --> 00:25:54,640
Speaker 1: say that I think the story would be different if

501
00:25:54,680 --> 00:25:57,840
Speaker 1: I felt that has eaten a very restrictive fashion in

502
00:25:57,960 --> 00:26:02,320
Speaker 1: order to maintain where I like to be. But I

503
00:26:02,359 --> 00:26:06,879
Speaker 1: actually feel like I know how to balance things having

504
00:26:06,880 --> 00:26:08,720
Speaker 1: gotten to the sage. And who knows, maybe that will

505
00:26:08,760 --> 00:26:11,919
Speaker 1: change when I'm like menopausal and I'll have to do

506
00:26:12,040 --> 00:26:15,080
Speaker 1: things differently. But yeah, now that's it. That certainly is

507
00:26:15,080 --> 00:26:18,120
Speaker 1: a People do tend to gain some weight as they

508
00:26:18,400 --> 00:26:21,119
Speaker 1: become older, and you know, you could explain the hormone

509
00:26:21,200 --> 00:26:24,800
Speaker 1: changes to people but that it is something to keep

510
00:26:24,840 --> 00:26:27,760
Speaker 1: in mind, and I'm honestly just aware of, like, you know,

511
00:26:27,880 --> 00:26:32,600
Speaker 1: people who are not naturally thin, I mean, the number

512
00:26:32,640 --> 00:26:36,640
Speaker 1: of heroics they would have to take to be sort

513
00:26:36,680 --> 00:26:41,639
Speaker 1: of more of the traditionally thin body type. It just

514
00:26:41,720 --> 00:26:44,239
Speaker 1: I mean, for many people, probably isn't worth it, you know,

515
00:26:44,280 --> 00:26:47,199
Speaker 1: it's just Yeah, I think if you're going through your

516
00:26:47,280 --> 00:26:49,480
Speaker 1: days and you're like distracted by your hunger, or you're

517
00:26:49,480 --> 00:26:54,199
Speaker 1: distracted by you know, not feeling comfortable because you in

518
00:26:54,320 --> 00:26:56,280
Speaker 1: order to eat the amount to look the way you

519
00:26:56,320 --> 00:26:58,680
Speaker 1: want your like just so distracted by that, yeah, it

520
00:26:58,680 --> 00:27:00,960
Speaker 1: wouldn't I don't think it would be worth it. Yeah,

521
00:27:01,359 --> 00:27:06,600
Speaker 1: let's talk about exercise, because you've been doing various different things.

522
00:27:06,640 --> 00:27:09,320
Speaker 1: I mean you've watched, you know, as I've read Star's

523
00:27:09,359 --> 00:27:11,800
Speaker 1: blog for ten years or so, you know, learning about

524
00:27:11,840 --> 00:27:15,600
Speaker 1: all the different exercise things she's tried over the years.

525
00:27:16,119 --> 00:27:19,360
Speaker 1: What's sort of going on with that? Yeah, I mean,

526
00:27:19,400 --> 00:27:23,080
Speaker 1: I think the one theme that I would say is

527
00:27:23,119 --> 00:27:26,879
Speaker 1: that I went from being probably in like in my twenties,

528
00:27:27,080 --> 00:27:31,480
Speaker 1: just a runner, to at age forty two now really

529
00:27:31,680 --> 00:27:36,119
Speaker 1: prioritizing strength training as well and lifting fairly heavyweights. I

530
00:27:36,119 --> 00:27:39,000
Speaker 1: mean I the heaviest weights I have are twenty five

531
00:27:39,040 --> 00:27:42,280
Speaker 1: pound dumballs, so I'm not talking about lifting like giant barbells,

532
00:27:42,320 --> 00:27:45,360
Speaker 1: but like for me to do squats with two twenty fives,

533
00:27:45,440 --> 00:27:47,760
Speaker 1: that's fifty Like that's that's like a decent amount of

534
00:27:47,800 --> 00:27:50,400
Speaker 1: weight to be lifting. And I think enough that I've

535
00:27:50,440 --> 00:27:53,280
Speaker 1: noticed a difference in strength and muscle definition. I love

536
00:27:53,359 --> 00:27:56,959
Speaker 1: doing guided programs. I've done different ones, but that's been

537
00:27:57,000 --> 00:27:59,960
Speaker 1: pretty consistent. I went straight from like I Didgillian Mike,

538
00:28:00,280 --> 00:28:02,800
Speaker 1: I did Beach Body, I did Peloton, I do Caroline

539
00:28:02,800 --> 00:28:05,680
Speaker 1: Garvan's on YouTube, like it's all kind of the same thing.

540
00:28:05,760 --> 00:28:09,400
Speaker 1: It's like a guided home weight based workout. And then

541
00:28:09,560 --> 00:28:13,239
Speaker 1: I have in different periods, done running in lesser or

542
00:28:13,240 --> 00:28:16,040
Speaker 1: more amounts, depending on time and my desire. Right now,

543
00:28:16,119 --> 00:28:18,639
Speaker 1: I'm like in a super running phase and it is

544
00:28:19,320 --> 00:28:21,119
Speaker 1: you know, as Laura mentioned, her activity went up and

545
00:28:21,160 --> 00:28:23,679
Speaker 1: her weight didn't change. I do not find that running

546
00:28:24,200 --> 00:28:26,639
Speaker 1: really influences my weight one way or the other. And

547
00:28:26,680 --> 00:28:29,680
Speaker 1: in fact, I feel like I've had the best kind

548
00:28:29,680 --> 00:28:34,399
Speaker 1: of like body composition and ease of maintaining without much running,

549
00:28:34,600 --> 00:28:37,520
Speaker 1: because I don't know, I think running makes you hungrier

550
00:28:37,680 --> 00:28:39,240
Speaker 1: and I think there is something to be said about

551
00:28:39,240 --> 00:28:41,080
Speaker 1: having to like fuel for different runs if you're trying

552
00:28:41,080 --> 00:28:44,320
Speaker 1: to run faster. But I love running. I love the

553
00:28:44,400 --> 00:28:47,320
Speaker 1: feeling I get after I run. I love training for stuff.

554
00:28:47,360 --> 00:28:49,800
Speaker 1: I love seeing myself get faster. I love training plans.

555
00:28:49,840 --> 00:28:51,600
Speaker 1: I love leaving the house to do my workouts. I

556
00:28:51,600 --> 00:28:55,040
Speaker 1: don't know so right now I'm back into it, Like

557
00:28:55,120 --> 00:28:57,680
Speaker 1: I'm thinking about maybe like a spring marathon even and

558
00:28:57,760 --> 00:29:01,000
Speaker 1: a fall half. But it's really truly not for any

559
00:29:01,040 --> 00:29:04,040
Speaker 1: body reasons. If I was if I wanted to do

560
00:29:04,120 --> 00:29:05,880
Speaker 1: something for a body reason, I know exactly what i'd do.

561
00:29:05,880 --> 00:29:07,600
Speaker 1: I would do like a pure lifting program of like

562
00:29:07,640 --> 00:29:09,600
Speaker 1: four or five days a week and lift heavier than

563
00:29:09,640 --> 00:29:12,600
Speaker 1: I'm lifting now. But that doesn't sound super fun to me,

564
00:29:12,760 --> 00:29:15,880
Speaker 1: whereas running is really fun exactly. Yeah, No, we got

565
00:29:16,240 --> 00:29:17,920
Speaker 1: gotta have a balance there. Yeah, I'm with you. I

566
00:29:18,160 --> 00:29:21,800
Speaker 1: should be doing more weightlifting. Not again, it's not about

567
00:29:21,960 --> 00:29:25,120
Speaker 1: you know, getting the chiseled arms or anything. It's just

568
00:29:25,200 --> 00:29:30,040
Speaker 1: that I think I would have some solve some back

569
00:29:30,120 --> 00:29:34,000
Speaker 1: pain issues, some you know it, band issues that I

570
00:29:34,040 --> 00:29:38,040
Speaker 1: think are developing because of weaker like core muscles, for instance,

571
00:29:38,080 --> 00:29:40,440
Speaker 1: that I really need to work on, so that's it's

572
00:29:40,440 --> 00:29:42,680
Speaker 1: something I should get in the habit of doing. Of course,

573
00:29:42,720 --> 00:29:44,760
Speaker 1: it's just like my exercise time, I want to run,

574
00:29:45,280 --> 00:29:47,440
Speaker 1: that's what I want to do, So that tends to

575
00:29:47,480 --> 00:29:50,640
Speaker 1: be what I do. You know, especially summer, I've been

576
00:29:50,840 --> 00:29:52,920
Speaker 1: waking up in the morning and running for thirty minutes

577
00:29:52,960 --> 00:29:55,040
Speaker 1: outside and then you know, it's it's just a great

578
00:29:55,040 --> 00:29:56,520
Speaker 1: way to start the day. Like I come back and

579
00:29:56,520 --> 00:29:59,480
Speaker 1: I'm like, I've done it. I've done my exercise. I

580
00:29:59,520 --> 00:30:01,840
Speaker 1: feel good. I have my cup of coffee, which you

581
00:30:01,880 --> 00:30:04,400
Speaker 1: know is also turns out to be a reflux trigger.

582
00:30:04,440 --> 00:30:06,320
Speaker 1: But I can take my santac and my next day

583
00:30:06,480 --> 00:30:09,480
Speaker 1: and make it work. And you know, I haven't had

584
00:30:09,480 --> 00:30:12,560
Speaker 1: to give up that because that would be sad if

585
00:30:12,560 --> 00:30:14,600
Speaker 1: I had to give that up too. My husband said

586
00:30:14,680 --> 00:30:16,480
Speaker 1: something like, what if for your migraines you have to

587
00:30:16,480 --> 00:30:19,200
Speaker 1: give up coffee. I'm like, then I'll just have It's

588
00:30:19,200 --> 00:30:22,200
Speaker 1: like maybe the pharmaceutical companies could come up with something

589
00:30:22,240 --> 00:30:25,280
Speaker 1: and I could just like lean on that, and you know,

590
00:30:26,320 --> 00:30:29,800
Speaker 1: but yeah, it's so like running is running is awesome.

591
00:30:29,800 --> 00:30:31,040
Speaker 1: But you know, I've tried to do with some other

592
00:30:31,080 --> 00:30:34,120
Speaker 1: things too, like you know, hiking, we My husband and

593
00:30:34,200 --> 00:30:37,120
Speaker 1: I went on an hour long, very swift bike ride

594
00:30:37,200 --> 00:30:39,440
Speaker 1: over the weekend together. We had a sitter for sort

595
00:30:39,480 --> 00:30:41,840
Speaker 1: of a longish date night, and so we went out

596
00:30:41,840 --> 00:30:44,560
Speaker 1: and biked together for an hour and went down to

597
00:30:45,760 --> 00:30:48,280
Speaker 1: Manny Yank from Kanchacken for anyone who's familiar with the

598
00:30:48,280 --> 00:30:51,240
Speaker 1: Schuokill River trail, which was a lot of fun. You know,

599
00:30:51,480 --> 00:30:54,920
Speaker 1: it's a it was a good swift, flat one and

600
00:30:55,080 --> 00:30:57,280
Speaker 1: you know, I feel like you get a good workout.

601
00:30:57,320 --> 00:30:59,440
Speaker 1: So hopefully do you know more of that in the

602
00:30:59,480 --> 00:31:03,200
Speaker 1: future too. That sounds lovely. Yeah, there's something to be

603
00:31:03,200 --> 00:31:05,520
Speaker 1: said for having like a basal level of fitness where

604
00:31:05,560 --> 00:31:07,680
Speaker 1: you're just kind of like ready for anything like a

605
00:31:07,720 --> 00:31:10,360
Speaker 1: decent hike or like a bike ride on a trip

606
00:31:10,720 --> 00:31:12,040
Speaker 1: or things like that. I don't even know if those

607
00:31:12,040 --> 00:31:14,760
Speaker 1: opportunities truly come around, but like I couldn't stand the

608
00:31:14,840 --> 00:31:17,040
Speaker 1: idea of like, oh, let's go do this and be like, oh,

609
00:31:17,080 --> 00:31:19,680
Speaker 1: I'm like I can't last more than ten minutes because

610
00:31:19,680 --> 00:31:21,760
Speaker 1: I can't breathe or something yeah, or even something like

611
00:31:22,360 --> 00:31:24,959
Speaker 1: you know, when we would snorkeling in the Virgin Islands,

612
00:31:25,040 --> 00:31:27,880
Speaker 1: like to be able to swim and open water for

613
00:31:28,000 --> 00:31:30,520
Speaker 1: a reasonable period of time. It's just something you have

614
00:31:30,560 --> 00:31:33,160
Speaker 1: to be a reasonable amount of physical fitness, you know,

615
00:31:33,280 --> 00:31:34,920
Speaker 1: have the shape to do I was very happy that

616
00:31:34,920 --> 00:31:37,120
Speaker 1: my kids were able to do it too, Like you know,

617
00:31:37,160 --> 00:31:39,400
Speaker 1: they're a little little fish. It turns out that they

618
00:31:39,400 --> 00:31:42,880
Speaker 1: can swim in open water, So who knew? That's amazing

619
00:31:42,880 --> 00:31:45,880
Speaker 1: speaking of kids, because of course, you know, what's many

620
00:31:45,960 --> 00:31:50,720
Speaker 1: things we are trying to model certain behaviors, and whether

621
00:31:50,800 --> 00:31:54,440
Speaker 1: we mean to or not, whatever we think and do

622
00:31:54,600 --> 00:31:58,000
Speaker 1: and show in our lives winds up impacting our children.

623
00:31:58,560 --> 00:32:02,040
Speaker 1: And so there's always question of how we talk about

624
00:32:02,080 --> 00:32:06,200
Speaker 1: our bodies and what actions we take. If you have children, particularly,

625
00:32:06,280 --> 00:32:09,080
Speaker 1: I would say if you have daughters, you know, so

626
00:32:09,120 --> 00:32:13,360
Speaker 1: I'm very curious how you are handling that. Yeah, I

627
00:32:13,400 --> 00:32:17,640
Speaker 1: mean I definitely am very thoughtful about it, very careful

628
00:32:17,680 --> 00:32:20,640
Speaker 1: not to like demonize different types of food, Like there

629
00:32:20,720 --> 00:32:24,680
Speaker 1: are foods we really try not to generally have, like

630
00:32:24,840 --> 00:32:27,440
Speaker 1: soda as an example, because I just feel like there

631
00:32:27,760 --> 00:32:30,200
Speaker 1: are few redeeming qualities. But if they tell me I

632
00:32:30,200 --> 00:32:32,520
Speaker 1: had soda at a birthday party, I want my reaction

633
00:32:32,560 --> 00:32:34,880
Speaker 1: to be super casual, like, hey was it good? Did

634
00:32:34,960 --> 00:32:37,640
Speaker 1: you like it? We're not buying that. But I hope

635
00:32:37,640 --> 00:32:40,120
Speaker 1: you had fun with that, you know. So that's a

636
00:32:40,160 --> 00:32:44,080
Speaker 1: big thing generally, not talking a lot about weight or preperizing,

637
00:32:44,160 --> 00:32:47,240
Speaker 1: you know, preferring one size over another. I think that's very,

638
00:32:47,360 --> 00:32:51,080
Speaker 1: very important. Not talking negatively about somebody because of them

639
00:32:51,120 --> 00:32:54,160
Speaker 1: being overweight, which is a little hypocritical of my own self.

640
00:32:54,200 --> 00:32:57,400
Speaker 1: Talk goes that direction, But I don't do that around

641
00:32:57,560 --> 00:33:00,479
Speaker 1: the kids. I had one child ask me like, how

642
00:33:00,560 --> 00:33:02,600
Speaker 1: much is a normal amount of weight to gain each year,

643
00:33:02,720 --> 00:33:05,360
Speaker 1: say a doctor's oointment, And I was like, don't worry

644
00:33:05,360 --> 00:33:07,440
Speaker 1: about it, Like I would never want to give them

645
00:33:07,480 --> 00:33:09,360
Speaker 1: a specific number. And I do that with my patients

646
00:33:09,360 --> 00:33:12,760
Speaker 1: as well, Like I'll have parents that are concerned about it,

647
00:33:12,880 --> 00:33:14,960
Speaker 1: like ask about an ideal weight for their child, and

648
00:33:15,000 --> 00:33:16,719
Speaker 1: I will never give it out. I'm like, that is

649
00:33:16,840 --> 00:33:19,160
Speaker 1: that is not the goal here. I'm like, let's talk

650
00:33:19,160 --> 00:33:21,479
Speaker 1: about healthy behaviors, let's talk about move and let's talk

651
00:33:21,480 --> 00:33:24,160
Speaker 1: about what makes them feel good. But if you know,

652
00:33:24,200 --> 00:33:26,840
Speaker 1: if you're looking for a number, like that's that's just

653
00:33:27,320 --> 00:33:30,320
Speaker 1: not the way a kid needs to be measuring up

654
00:33:30,320 --> 00:33:33,440
Speaker 1: their self worth or determining their behaviors around. So really

655
00:33:33,440 --> 00:33:37,560
Speaker 1: really careful about that from a professional standpoint as well. Yeah, no,

656
00:33:37,760 --> 00:33:39,520
Speaker 1: I think it's I think it's really hard. And I

657
00:33:39,840 --> 00:33:42,960
Speaker 1: was speaking of you know, we had pulled out the scale,

658
00:33:43,760 --> 00:33:45,600
Speaker 1: you know, because I found it in my closet and

659
00:33:45,640 --> 00:33:48,720
Speaker 1: so I had stepped on it. And then my daughter

660
00:33:48,880 --> 00:33:50,920
Speaker 1: came into my closet and so she say, oh, I'll

661
00:33:50,920 --> 00:33:52,800
Speaker 1: step on that, let me see, and then she's she

662
00:33:52,920 --> 00:33:55,440
Speaker 1: was like, wow, I'm that's a higher number than I

663
00:33:55,600 --> 00:33:57,520
Speaker 1: was before. And she was saying this in a way

664
00:33:57,560 --> 00:33:59,400
Speaker 1: that was like like that was a problem, Like no,

665
00:33:59,720 --> 00:34:02,600
Speaker 1: you're you're growing. This is it's supposed to go up.

666
00:34:02,640 --> 00:34:04,320
Speaker 1: If it doesn't go up, we have a big problem.

667
00:34:04,360 --> 00:34:06,320
Speaker 1: Like you know, you're supposed to go But it's just

668
00:34:06,360 --> 00:34:08,560
Speaker 1: like I, you know, I think that scale is going

669
00:34:08,600 --> 00:34:14,279
Speaker 1: to go away again, so lest it be found and

670
00:34:14,520 --> 00:34:18,440
Speaker 1: lest anyone continue to step on it. So that is

671
00:34:18,719 --> 00:34:23,600
Speaker 1: my current plan. I like it. I was I going

672
00:34:23,640 --> 00:34:26,040
Speaker 1: to say anything else about kids, I don't know, just

673
00:34:26,040 --> 00:34:27,920
Speaker 1: that this is such a tough road to navigate. And

674
00:34:27,920 --> 00:34:30,799
Speaker 1: I think if you're being thoughtful about it, if you

675
00:34:31,040 --> 00:34:35,040
Speaker 1: are thinking twice before you say something like oh I

676
00:34:35,040 --> 00:34:37,279
Speaker 1: shouldn't have eaten that, or I don't deserve to eat that,

677
00:34:37,560 --> 00:34:39,759
Speaker 1: or like we do deserve to eat that because we

678
00:34:40,280 --> 00:34:43,680
Speaker 1: did something good, then you're probably going to be doing

679
00:34:43,760 --> 00:34:45,920
Speaker 1: the right thing just by kind of thinking about it

680
00:34:45,960 --> 00:34:47,600
Speaker 1: and giving it some thought. Yeah, I think as with

681
00:34:47,719 --> 00:34:50,160
Speaker 1: most of you know, many things, whenever we talk about

682
00:34:50,160 --> 00:34:53,400
Speaker 1: goal setting, right and on this podcast, the difference between

683
00:34:53,480 --> 00:34:56,880
Speaker 1: outcome goals and process goals that you know you can't

684
00:34:57,200 --> 00:35:00,160
Speaker 1: I mean obviously that you could like lose a leg

685
00:35:00,200 --> 00:35:03,279
Speaker 1: and suddenly lose twenty pounds. I mean that's not recommended, right, Like,

686
00:35:03,400 --> 00:35:05,520
Speaker 1: or you could you know, have a horrible you know,

687
00:35:06,120 --> 00:35:09,120
Speaker 1: parasite or whatever and lose weight. Like it's not just

688
00:35:09,160 --> 00:35:12,480
Speaker 1: about the number, right, It's it's that it's supposed to

689
00:35:12,480 --> 00:35:16,080
Speaker 1: be indicating that there are healthy behaviors happening. And so

690
00:35:16,239 --> 00:35:20,000
Speaker 1: let's just focus on the healthy behaviors and because those

691
00:35:20,040 --> 00:35:24,480
Speaker 1: you can often control. And so, yeah, especially with kids,

692
00:35:24,520 --> 00:35:27,360
Speaker 1: just trying to encourage lots of activity, like we do

693
00:35:27,520 --> 00:35:30,320
Speaker 1: things together on the weekends. And are you in sports

694
00:35:30,360 --> 00:35:32,279
Speaker 1: and are you in other things that you know, get

695
00:35:32,320 --> 00:35:34,319
Speaker 1: you up off the couch and you know, not just

696
00:35:34,360 --> 00:35:36,680
Speaker 1: with your nose and your video games all day? Okay, great,

697
00:35:37,400 --> 00:35:40,000
Speaker 1: you know what food do we have in the house, Like, yes,

698
00:35:40,040 --> 00:35:42,200
Speaker 1: obviously we have snack food, but we you know, have

699
00:35:42,440 --> 00:35:44,680
Speaker 1: sort of within a limited range of what those snack

700
00:35:44,719 --> 00:35:48,520
Speaker 1: foods are, and like you said, like less soda for instance,

701
00:35:48,560 --> 00:35:50,919
Speaker 1: although we have one kid who really really likes root beer,

702
00:35:50,960 --> 00:35:54,800
Speaker 1: so it's like there's root beer in the house. It's fine,

703
00:35:55,040 --> 00:35:58,600
Speaker 1: sort of limited, but you know, and just put lots

704
00:35:58,640 --> 00:36:00,640
Speaker 1: of fruits and veggies on plates. Like when we have

705
00:36:00,800 --> 00:36:03,400
Speaker 1: our family meals, there's lots of fruits and veggies on

706
00:36:03,440 --> 00:36:06,359
Speaker 1: the plates, and you know, the expectation is that you

707
00:36:06,440 --> 00:36:09,040
Speaker 1: eat them. I mean, it doesn't always happen, but that

708
00:36:09,200 --> 00:36:14,200
Speaker 1: is the expectations. So you know, like obviously people eat

709
00:36:14,239 --> 00:36:17,440
Speaker 1: outside the house various meals and you know, go elsewhere

710
00:36:17,480 --> 00:36:20,080
Speaker 1: and have treats and all that. We certainly don't not

711
00:36:20,120 --> 00:36:23,160
Speaker 1: do it. I think my kids are literally at McDonald's. Yeah, yeah,

712
00:36:23,320 --> 00:36:25,440
Speaker 1: we've been going to huah wah and getting their icys.

713
00:36:25,520 --> 00:36:28,920
Speaker 1: Like it's like almost a I mean it's a routine

714
00:36:29,000 --> 00:36:32,319
Speaker 1: thing in the summer now, I would say. And so yeah,

715
00:36:32,480 --> 00:36:37,080
Speaker 1: there's there's just the reality of that. But I think

716
00:36:37,120 --> 00:36:42,279
Speaker 1: you know, you do what you can exactly, all right,

717
00:36:42,719 --> 00:36:45,719
Speaker 1: love of the week or question first, Well, we can

718
00:36:45,760 --> 00:36:49,600
Speaker 1: do the question. So here's you know what question. We've

719
00:36:49,600 --> 00:36:53,440
Speaker 1: been getting different versions of as more people are you know,

720
00:36:53,480 --> 00:36:55,920
Speaker 1: still working from home? There's some like pretty good data

721
00:36:56,000 --> 00:36:58,600
Speaker 1: that the proportion of people who are doing summer all

722
00:36:58,640 --> 00:37:01,760
Speaker 1: of their work at home is canting to be quite high,

723
00:37:01,840 --> 00:37:04,520
Speaker 1: and particularly people and sort of the you know, information

724
00:37:04,600 --> 00:37:07,120
Speaker 1: related industries. Obviously, if you do you know, you're a

725
00:37:07,360 --> 00:37:10,000
Speaker 1: dental hygienist, you're not doing that at home. But you

726
00:37:10,000 --> 00:37:11,839
Speaker 1: know you're driving a truck, you're not doing that at home,

727
00:37:11,840 --> 00:37:14,560
Speaker 1: but you are a lot of a lot of you know,

728
00:37:14,760 --> 00:37:18,440
Speaker 1: information type work. So people are setting their school schedules

729
00:37:18,440 --> 00:37:21,800
Speaker 1: for the fall, their childcare schedules. Question. I've had a

730
00:37:21,840 --> 00:37:25,080
Speaker 1: couple versions of, is I work from home so theoretically

731
00:37:25,120 --> 00:37:27,080
Speaker 1: I can pick up my school kids at school in

732
00:37:27,120 --> 00:37:32,120
Speaker 1: the afternoon? Should I? So, Sarah, what do you think? Well,

733
00:37:32,160 --> 00:37:35,279
Speaker 1: there's no one right answer to this. This is absolutely

734
00:37:35,600 --> 00:37:38,040
Speaker 1: you have to I would draw out all the various

735
00:37:38,040 --> 00:37:41,359
Speaker 1: scenarios of what you would lose and gain from each one,

736
00:37:41,880 --> 00:37:45,280
Speaker 1: including remembering the fact that you could do things differently

737
00:37:45,320 --> 00:37:48,520
Speaker 1: on different days, so you don't have to make the choice,

738
00:37:49,000 --> 00:37:51,759
Speaker 1: especially because there are a lot of aftercare programs where

739
00:37:51,760 --> 00:37:54,200
Speaker 1: you can like purchase for like Thursdays and Fridays or

740
00:37:54,239 --> 00:37:57,040
Speaker 1: like whatever you choose that to be. So I would

741
00:37:57,080 --> 00:37:58,960
Speaker 1: not think about this in black and white terms. And

742
00:37:59,000 --> 00:38:01,200
Speaker 1: I would also not think in like, once I decide

743
00:38:01,239 --> 00:38:02,719
Speaker 1: for the school year, that's what we're going to do

744
00:38:02,800 --> 00:38:05,879
Speaker 1: for the whole year. I think it really depends are

745
00:38:05,880 --> 00:38:08,000
Speaker 1: you normally able to get your work done or are

746
00:38:08,040 --> 00:38:10,400
Speaker 1: you just in the groove at that moment. Do you

747
00:38:10,400 --> 00:38:12,439
Speaker 1: feel like you get enough hours in because you're able

748
00:38:12,480 --> 00:38:15,040
Speaker 1: to start earlier because your partner is handling the mornings,

749
00:38:15,280 --> 00:38:17,200
Speaker 1: or do you feel like, oh my god, now I'm

750
00:38:17,239 --> 00:38:18,759
Speaker 1: going to end up with a five hour work day

751
00:38:18,760 --> 00:38:20,480
Speaker 1: and I'm always going to be behind or working after

752
00:38:20,560 --> 00:38:23,520
Speaker 1: the kids are going to go to sleep. I will say,

753
00:38:23,680 --> 00:38:26,239
Speaker 1: if picking them up necessitates that you're going to end

754
00:38:26,320 --> 00:38:29,439
Speaker 1: up working for hours after their bedtime, think really really

755
00:38:29,440 --> 00:38:31,680
Speaker 1: hard about that. I mean, maybe you love that, you

756
00:38:31,719 --> 00:38:33,920
Speaker 1: love working at night, but like I feel like a

757
00:38:33,920 --> 00:38:38,040
Speaker 1: lot of people don't love that. So I would think

758
00:38:38,040 --> 00:38:41,279
Speaker 1: about what that trade off entails, because you also might

759
00:38:41,320 --> 00:38:43,440
Speaker 1: not be as present with them in the evenings if

760
00:38:43,440 --> 00:38:44,959
Speaker 1: you know you're going to have to like run back

761
00:38:45,000 --> 00:38:47,480
Speaker 1: to your laptop so it's always going to be balancing

762
00:38:47,520 --> 00:38:50,560
Speaker 1: what works. But I mean if this were me personally,

763
00:38:50,560 --> 00:38:53,560
Speaker 1: I would probably do a hybrid and like decide I

764
00:38:53,600 --> 00:38:55,279
Speaker 1: was going to pick them up on certain days, maybe

765
00:38:55,320 --> 00:38:56,680
Speaker 1: a certain day that I could take them to some

766
00:38:56,719 --> 00:38:58,680
Speaker 1: fun activity that I wanted to watch them at, and

767
00:38:58,719 --> 00:39:02,160
Speaker 1: then other days complete my workday so I can be done. Yeah,

768
00:39:02,200 --> 00:39:05,279
Speaker 1: I would, I would say probably, you know, doing a

769
00:39:05,680 --> 00:39:07,799
Speaker 1: not either or sort of situation like signing them up

770
00:39:07,840 --> 00:39:09,879
Speaker 1: for aftercare three days a week and then two days

771
00:39:09,880 --> 00:39:12,120
Speaker 1: a week picking them up. I think it's also matters

772
00:39:12,560 --> 00:39:14,880
Speaker 1: are your kids old enough to sort of entertain themselves

773
00:39:14,960 --> 00:39:18,480
Speaker 1: at home while you're working, Because if they are, you know,

774
00:39:19,120 --> 00:39:21,479
Speaker 1: old enough, like we're talking kids you know, eight ten

775
00:39:21,640 --> 00:39:24,600
Speaker 1: and so and you know independent types, you know, you

776
00:39:24,600 --> 00:39:27,399
Speaker 1: could do some more work after picking them up, right,

777
00:39:28,080 --> 00:39:30,600
Speaker 1: So that also it's kind of different if you're talking

778
00:39:30,719 --> 00:39:32,880
Speaker 1: like a five year old who can't really you know,

779
00:39:33,120 --> 00:39:34,759
Speaker 1: take care of themselves, and you're gonna have to be

780
00:39:35,239 --> 00:39:38,680
Speaker 1: on them during this time versus them being around the house.

781
00:39:38,719 --> 00:39:41,239
Speaker 1: But you could still you know, do another hour of

782
00:39:41,280 --> 00:39:43,560
Speaker 1: work while while they're playing in the backyard or watching

783
00:39:43,640 --> 00:39:45,400
Speaker 1: a show or whatever it is you're you're willing to

784
00:39:45,400 --> 00:39:47,400
Speaker 1: have them do at that point. And I think the

785
00:39:47,440 --> 00:39:49,719
Speaker 1: other thing to think about is how much time it

786
00:39:49,719 --> 00:39:52,520
Speaker 1: takes to get them. Like, if it's a situation where

787
00:39:52,640 --> 00:39:55,800
Speaker 1: you are, you know, two blocks from your elementary school,

788
00:39:55,960 --> 00:39:59,319
Speaker 1: you can just walk over there and just like get

789
00:39:59,320 --> 00:40:01,960
Speaker 1: them at the gate and go home. You know, So

790
00:40:02,040 --> 00:40:04,800
Speaker 1: it's like a fifteen minute process. That's kind of different

791
00:40:04,800 --> 00:40:07,880
Speaker 1: than if it's a you know, ten to fifteen minute

792
00:40:08,040 --> 00:40:10,719
Speaker 1: drive plus fifteen minutes in a car line and then

793
00:40:10,800 --> 00:40:13,280
Speaker 1: driving hat Like, then we're talking, you know, forty minutes

794
00:40:13,280 --> 00:40:16,440
Speaker 1: out of your day versus fifteen, and there's some significant

795
00:40:16,480 --> 00:40:19,560
Speaker 1: differences there. So I think all of that's going to

796
00:40:19,640 --> 00:40:21,680
Speaker 1: need to play into the decision. But there's no right

797
00:40:21,760 --> 00:40:23,360
Speaker 1: or wrong. You are not a great mom if you

798
00:40:23,400 --> 00:40:25,560
Speaker 1: do it, and you're not a bad mom if you don't.

799
00:40:26,239 --> 00:40:29,279
Speaker 1: You are also not a horrible employee if you do it,

800
00:40:29,760 --> 00:40:31,840
Speaker 1: and a great employee if you show how serious you

801
00:40:31,880 --> 00:40:33,640
Speaker 1: are about your work that you wouldn't dare think about

802
00:40:33,680 --> 00:40:36,200
Speaker 1: picking up your kids, right, Like, none of this needs

803
00:40:36,200 --> 00:40:38,880
Speaker 1: to be like that. It can really be a combination,

804
00:40:39,080 --> 00:40:41,719
Speaker 1: and I think it can be, you know, make make

805
00:40:41,800 --> 00:40:44,640
Speaker 1: lots of different things, work, love, it all right, Love

806
00:40:44,680 --> 00:40:47,440
Speaker 1: of the week, Sarah, what do you have? I'm so

807
00:40:47,560 --> 00:40:51,719
Speaker 1: excited for my love of the week. Okay, So you

808
00:40:51,719 --> 00:40:54,680
Speaker 1: guys know I've spoken before about the Homoni Chi Techo

809
00:40:54,800 --> 00:40:57,799
Speaker 1: planners and how much I love them, and how it

810
00:40:57,800 --> 00:40:59,640
Speaker 1: actually used to be fairly hard to order them, like

811
00:40:59,640 --> 00:41:01,279
Speaker 1: there was site you had to figure out how to

812
00:41:01,360 --> 00:41:03,839
Speaker 1: convert it to English, and you know, they ship from

813
00:41:03,880 --> 00:41:07,800
Speaker 1: Japan and they're all in Japanese. For twenty twenty three,

814
00:41:07,880 --> 00:41:12,040
Speaker 1: they just announced they have finally released English language versions

815
00:41:12,200 --> 00:41:14,400
Speaker 1: of two of their very popular planners. They actually had

816
00:41:14,400 --> 00:41:16,440
Speaker 1: already had an English version of one of them, so

817
00:41:16,560 --> 00:41:19,600
Speaker 1: I thought that perhaps the others would be coming down

818
00:41:19,640 --> 00:41:21,719
Speaker 1: the pike, but that's been out for years and I

819
00:41:21,800 --> 00:41:24,200
Speaker 1: kind of lost hope. And then I saw the announcement.

820
00:41:24,280 --> 00:41:26,680
Speaker 1: I was so so excited. So if you're a Hobinishi

821
00:41:26,760 --> 00:41:29,960
Speaker 1: lover but you wanted your planner to be in English,

822
00:41:30,120 --> 00:41:33,520
Speaker 1: now it's your challenge and their sin. They start selling

823
00:41:33,600 --> 00:41:36,280
Speaker 1: them in September. You can always go to my blog

824
00:41:36,320 --> 00:41:38,680
Speaker 1: if you want, you know all the latest news on

825
00:41:38,719 --> 00:41:41,799
Speaker 1: that awesome. That is awesome, and then you can not

826
00:41:41,880 --> 00:41:46,200
Speaker 1: be intimidated by ordering things from a Japanese website. That's great.

827
00:41:46,640 --> 00:41:50,640
Speaker 1: So my love of the week is our thermodoor coffee maker.

828
00:41:51,160 --> 00:41:53,879
Speaker 1: So it's built into the wall. We have had sort

829
00:41:53,920 --> 00:41:56,799
Speaker 1: of regular like drip coffee machines for our entire you know,

830
00:41:57,080 --> 00:41:59,879
Speaker 1: adult lives, but this one on the wall. You put

831
00:42:00,160 --> 00:42:04,880
Speaker 1: the beans and there's a pipe to it, like it's wired,

832
00:42:04,920 --> 00:42:06,759
Speaker 1: you know, built the pipe the water into the wall,

833
00:42:07,480 --> 00:42:09,360
Speaker 1: and so then you just you press the button and

834
00:42:09,400 --> 00:42:12,080
Speaker 1: it makes you a cup of coffee from freshly ground beans.

835
00:42:12,480 --> 00:42:15,520
Speaker 1: And it's really really very exciting because it's like one

836
00:42:15,600 --> 00:42:17,640
Speaker 1: cup at a time, but the fresh ground beans, and

837
00:42:18,160 --> 00:42:20,719
Speaker 1: you know, it's so you know, just put the mug

838
00:42:20,800 --> 00:42:23,560
Speaker 1: under there in the morning and press the button. It's like, ah,

839
00:42:23,640 --> 00:42:26,160
Speaker 1: it's just really and it's better coffee too because it's

840
00:42:26,200 --> 00:42:29,799
Speaker 1: right from the freshly ground beans. So that has been

841
00:42:29,840 --> 00:42:35,000
Speaker 1: a nice little treat every single morning, and I'm very

842
00:42:35,160 --> 00:42:39,320
Speaker 1: very happy about it, and also happy that my combination

843
00:42:39,440 --> 00:42:42,120
Speaker 1: of reflux medication means that I can drink my coffee

844
00:42:42,200 --> 00:42:44,479
Speaker 1: and not worry about it. I can only drink really

845
00:42:44,480 --> 00:42:48,000
Speaker 1: one cup. I suspecting that my husband is drinking a

846
00:42:48,040 --> 00:42:50,120
Speaker 1: lot of cups because I'm getting the message of like

847
00:42:50,520 --> 00:42:53,719
Speaker 1: empty coffee grounds frequently and I'm like, really, I feel

848
00:42:53,760 --> 00:42:55,680
Speaker 1: like I've only had like two cups of coffee since

849
00:42:55,680 --> 00:42:58,319
Speaker 1: I came last day. There's he's probably had like eight

850
00:42:58,440 --> 00:43:01,759
Speaker 1: in that time. But anyway, it's a good machine, so

851
00:43:02,000 --> 00:43:04,719
Speaker 1: really liking it. It sounds awesome. Well, we have been

852
00:43:04,760 --> 00:43:08,959
Speaker 1: talking all things body image. This is you know, as said,

853
00:43:09,320 --> 00:43:11,359
Speaker 1: if you've made it through to this point, thank you.

854
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Speaker 1: I know some people probably didn't want to listen to

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Speaker 1: this topic, which we totally understand. Will not hold it

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Speaker 1: again against anyone at all, but anyway, we will be

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Speaker 1: back next week with more on making work and life

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Speaker 1: fit together. Thanks for listening. You can find me Sarah

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00:43:25,760 --> 00:43:29,600
Speaker 1: at the shoebox dot com or at the Underscore Shoebox

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00:43:29,640 --> 00:43:33,359
Speaker 1: on Instagram, and you can find me Laura at Laura

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Speaker 1: vandercam dot com. This has been the best of both

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00:43:36,760 --> 00:43:40,279
Speaker 1: worlds podcasts. Please join us next time for more on

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Speaker 1: making work and life work together.