WEBVTT - Mid-Week Mom Chat: Bestie Talk w Amanda Satcher. 0:00:00.120 --> 0:00:04.120 Hello everyone. This is a really special midweek mom chat 0:00:04.240 --> 0:00:08.360 because I have one of my best friends, longest lifetime 0:00:08.440 --> 0:00:13.400 friends joining me. Amanda Satcher formerly known as Amanda addis 0:00:13.400 --> 0:00:17.480 from Waco, Texas, where I grew up. What's up? Hello, Well, 0:00:17.520 --> 0:00:20.520 this is kind of an unexpected reason that we're together 0:00:20.640 --> 0:00:22.960 right now. I spent the night at her house last 0:00:23.040 --> 0:00:25.360 night because for all of you guys following the news, 0:00:26.360 --> 0:00:31.640 Nashville got hit by tornado. Um on what days today? 0:00:33.760 --> 0:00:36.800 Monday night? Monday night. It got hit on Monday. Yeah, 0:00:36.880 --> 0:00:40.199 national guys, today's Wednesday. Nashville got hit by tornado on 0:00:40.240 --> 0:00:43.640 Monday night. It came out of the blue. It hit 0:00:43.720 --> 0:00:46.640 downtown Nashville, then it really wrecked German Town, and then 0:00:46.680 --> 0:00:49.480 it hit East Nahville where I live, and really messed 0:00:49.560 --> 0:00:53.599 up our neighborhood. We our house was not hit. We're 0:00:53.640 --> 0:00:55.920 so thankful, but so many other people's were. And it's 0:00:55.960 --> 0:00:59.480 just crazy when you go through a natural disaster like that. 0:00:59.840 --> 0:01:03.240 So our powers out and so Amanda and Bill her husband, 0:01:03.240 --> 0:01:07.480 Bill plays guitar, four thousand horses. UM let us come 0:01:07.520 --> 0:01:09.040 stay with them and pack up our entire life and 0:01:09.040 --> 0:01:10.520 bringing over their house. So thanks for the us to 0:01:10.560 --> 0:01:13.399 move in. It's been really fun. We used to live together, 0:01:13.560 --> 0:01:17.639 so it's kind of like a little fun um sleepover union. 0:01:18.000 --> 0:01:20.400 That was really fun when we lived together. How long 0:01:20.440 --> 0:01:24.120 do we live together? A couple of years? I like 0:01:24.120 --> 0:01:26.840 four sho out of your apartment. You had great apartment, 0:01:26.840 --> 0:01:28.880 and I was like, just like break your rent and 0:01:28.959 --> 0:01:31.520 coming in with me. I think it was like two years. 0:01:34.160 --> 0:01:36.960 Good times. And the funny thing about Amanda and I 0:01:37.200 --> 0:01:40.039 is our moms are best friends also, so we got 0:01:40.040 --> 0:01:43.040 a deep lineage here. And then my dad recently had 0:01:43.280 --> 0:01:47.240 a lot of heart situation and Michael's and Amanda's dad 0:01:47.440 --> 0:01:50.280 was right there by my dad's side because he's a 0:01:50.320 --> 0:01:52.320 heart surgeon and all sorts of stuff. So our families 0:01:52.360 --> 0:01:55.400 are super intertwined. And I introduced Bill in Amanda. Yeah, yeah, 0:01:55.480 --> 0:01:57.360 you're the reason for my marriage. Okay, you gotta tell 0:01:57.360 --> 0:02:01.520 you gotta tell that story. Um, So I just moved 0:02:01.560 --> 0:02:04.559 to Nashville and I was coming out of a really 0:02:04.600 --> 0:02:07.480 long relationship and I moved here for graduate school and 0:02:08.120 --> 0:02:10.680 I was like really focused and so excited to be 0:02:10.760 --> 0:02:13.920 single after being in a relationship for like four years 0:02:13.960 --> 0:02:16.400 in college. You're like, I moved to Nashville, I want 0:02:16.400 --> 0:02:18.720 to get my date on. Yeah. I was like, oh 0:02:18.760 --> 0:02:22.280 my gosh, I'm gonna kiss everybody. And I moved to 0:02:22.360 --> 0:02:26.160 Nashville and I ran into Caroline and Michael at pet 0:02:26.160 --> 0:02:30.919 Smart and um, she said, my boyfriend's in this band 0:02:30.960 --> 0:02:33.160 and they have a show tonight. Do you'all do you 0:02:33.160 --> 0:02:34.799 want to come? And I was like, well, yeah, I don't. 0:02:34.840 --> 0:02:37.000 I don't know anybody. I had moved to Nashville like 0:02:37.040 --> 0:02:39.480 two or three days before, so I was like, yeah, sure, 0:02:39.480 --> 0:02:43.200 I'll go. And I met Bill that night and we 0:02:43.320 --> 0:02:45.840 just like sat and talked about Saved by the Bell 0:02:45.880 --> 0:02:48.119 and I don't know, it was kind of like awkward 0:02:48.120 --> 0:02:51.000 because we were both a little bit shy. And then 0:02:51.840 --> 0:02:53.680 he asked you to dinner afterwards, but he had no 0:02:53.840 --> 0:02:56.960 dollars in his banking Yeah, he asked me. Yeah, that's right. 0:02:56.960 --> 0:02:58.640 He asked me if we could, like if I wanted 0:02:58.680 --> 0:03:04.200 to go somewhere, um, and I was like sure, like 0:03:04.280 --> 0:03:07.040 go grab like some food or something. And then we 0:03:07.080 --> 0:03:09.280 went and then I guess while we were there, they 0:03:09.280 --> 0:03:10.840 had an a t M at the back. When you 0:03:10.840 --> 0:03:12.560 still have to check your balance on a t M, 0:03:13.160 --> 0:03:15.600 I was like ten years ago, and he went and 0:03:15.639 --> 0:03:17.600 checked his balance and he had like three dollars in 0:03:17.680 --> 0:03:20.920 his bank account, and so he didn't end up ordering anything. 0:03:21.000 --> 0:03:22.920 So what can't you even order on the menu for 0:03:22.960 --> 0:03:25.200 three dollars? I ordered to Booley because it was like 0:03:25.240 --> 0:03:27.359 ten pm and we went to a restaurant called to Bouley? 0:03:27.639 --> 0:03:30.160 And how much did that cost? You bought your own? 0:03:30.200 --> 0:03:32.280 I just it wasn't because it wasn't a date and 0:03:32.320 --> 0:03:34.280 he didn't order anything. So then it was like, I'm 0:03:34.320 --> 0:03:36.280 just gonna pay for my own to Boley, you know. 0:03:37.160 --> 0:03:41.240 So um. But yeah, and then um, that was kind 0:03:41.240 --> 0:03:43.480 of that was it. And then I remember at the 0:03:43.560 --> 0:03:47.800 end of the night that Michael said, uh, Bill Sacher, 0:03:47.960 --> 0:03:52.600 think about it, and I was like, yelled that across 0:03:52.640 --> 0:03:56.280 the parking lot and I was like, I that's so funny. 0:03:56.440 --> 0:03:58.600 I hadn't. I had not really thought about it, but 0:03:59.320 --> 0:04:04.200 I guess I'll think about it. So um. But yeah, 0:04:04.240 --> 0:04:06.480 here we are ten years later. Was that the start 0:04:06.480 --> 0:04:08.720 of true love? Like? Did just start dating exclusively? Yeah? 0:04:09.560 --> 0:04:12.200 Do you remember? Like you? I guess he was so 0:04:12.240 --> 0:04:15.520 shy and he he was so nervous around girls, and 0:04:15.560 --> 0:04:17.600 he'd never I'm sure he would love me, saying that 0:04:17.720 --> 0:04:23.400 he had never had a real girlfriend. And he asked me, um, 0:04:23.640 --> 0:04:26.679 you had a barbecue at your house. I probably planned 0:04:26.680 --> 0:04:29.080 it for y'all, you did. And so he asked me 0:04:29.200 --> 0:04:31.080 if I would go to the barbecue with him. He 0:04:31.320 --> 0:04:34.560 called me on my home phone and as if I 0:04:34.560 --> 0:04:37.000 would go to the barbecue, and I said yeah, And 0:04:37.040 --> 0:04:39.599 so he came and picked me up and knocked on 0:04:39.640 --> 0:04:42.800 the door and like the whole thing, Oh my gosh, 0:04:43.040 --> 0:04:45.799 did he bring me flowers? He didn't bring me flowers. 0:04:45.839 --> 0:04:49.279 But we were helping, like to cut like an onion 0:04:49.320 --> 0:04:53.120 in the kitchen, and he held my hands. Did you 0:04:53.160 --> 0:04:58.679 get Tingley? Yeah? I was like, dang it. I wanted 0:04:58.680 --> 0:05:01.520 to be single so bad, but really think you're so cute. 0:05:02.400 --> 0:05:05.799 So that was it. That was it, And I felt 0:05:05.839 --> 0:05:09.159 so bad because I'm like, here comes Amanda. She's coming 0:05:09.200 --> 0:05:12.920 to school to be an occupational therapist, Like she's got 0:05:12.920 --> 0:05:14.920 a bright future, and let me just go ahead and 0:05:14.960 --> 0:05:18.800 introduce her to my rock and roll boyfriend and his bandmate. 0:05:18.960 --> 0:05:22.760 And God knows, like this is every parent's nightmare. Long 0:05:22.839 --> 0:05:25.960 Hair didn't go to college. Three dollars in the big 0:05:26.000 --> 0:05:29.120 account of cool, super cool and charming. I'm telling you, 0:05:29.160 --> 0:05:31.440 those rock stars will get you, and my dad said, 0:05:31.520 --> 0:05:33.400 don't go to Nashville and just fall in love with 0:05:33.400 --> 0:05:37.159 a musician. And then like a week later, it's like, sorry, Dad, 0:05:37.920 --> 0:05:40.400 I felt so guilty about it. For I'm like, oh gosh, 0:05:40.960 --> 0:05:42.480 because I have known your parents a whole life. I'm like, 0:05:42.480 --> 0:05:44.760 they're gonna kill me. Oh, but now my dad and 0:05:44.800 --> 0:05:48.400 Bill are like basically the same person. They are so 0:05:48.480 --> 0:05:51.720 similar it's eerie. Yeah, it really is eerie, Like to 0:05:51.880 --> 0:05:54.080 talk on the phone about music and fly fishing all 0:05:54.120 --> 0:05:56.240 the time. They call each other on the phone. Yeah, 0:05:58.040 --> 0:05:59.880 I just talked to my dad on the phone. He's like, 0:06:00.040 --> 0:06:01.719 it's Bill still on the plane. I'm gonna I'm gonna 0:06:01.720 --> 0:06:05.600 give him a call here in a little bit. Oh. 0:06:06.440 --> 0:06:08.400 It's been fun. This journey has been fun, and it's 0:06:08.400 --> 0:06:10.320 been fun to do it with you because we've had 0:06:10.360 --> 0:06:12.440 our whole life together growing up, even though I've been 0:06:12.440 --> 0:06:14.200 older than us, four years older than you, so it's 0:06:14.240 --> 0:06:16.479 like we weren't like quite in the same circles, but 0:06:16.600 --> 0:06:19.120 always went to church together and knew each other. And 0:06:19.120 --> 0:06:21.600 then having this band life together, it just it has 0:06:21.640 --> 0:06:26.720 made a big difference because it is a rot ride 0:06:27.120 --> 0:06:29.920 to be a band wife to be in the music industry, 0:06:30.040 --> 0:06:34.080 to be married to musicians, and now you were seven 0:06:34.120 --> 0:06:38.400 months pregnant twenty nine weeks weeks on Thursday with a 0:06:38.480 --> 0:06:42.240 little baby. Pretty crazy. I'm wanna talk about your journey 0:06:42.279 --> 0:06:44.560 because you and I both had journeys to get to 0:06:44.600 --> 0:06:47.720 being pregnant. So tell me about your journey to get here, 0:06:47.720 --> 0:06:50.240 because I know that was an emotional journey for you, 0:06:50.320 --> 0:06:53.400 and so many women go through this and it is 0:06:53.960 --> 0:07:00.000 so painful and emotionally painful. Well, I only ever really 0:07:00.000 --> 0:07:01.960 really wanted to be a mom, like growing up, Like 0:07:01.960 --> 0:07:03.240 when people are like, what do you want to be 0:07:03.320 --> 0:07:05.120 when you grow up, I'm like, I don't just a 0:07:05.160 --> 0:07:08.440 mom really, Like I mean, I love being an occupational therapist, 0:07:08.480 --> 0:07:12.400 but I really just that has always been something nice. Yeah, 0:07:12.720 --> 0:07:18.240 So I guess um, I was surprised. I was surprised 0:07:18.440 --> 0:07:21.360 that it wasn't easy for us to get pregnant, and 0:07:21.440 --> 0:07:23.680 which is very surprising because you go your whole life 0:07:23.800 --> 0:07:25.920 trying not to get pregnant, and oh, I'm just gonna 0:07:26.280 --> 0:07:29.120 get pregnant. Yeah. And I had an i U D. 0:07:29.240 --> 0:07:31.400 And when I took it out, I got I was 0:07:31.440 --> 0:07:34.080 glad I took it out. Maybe a little bit sooner 0:07:34.120 --> 0:07:37.280 than I thought I was maybe ready for because some 0:07:37.280 --> 0:07:39.360 people had said like, oh, sometimes it will take you 0:07:39.400 --> 0:07:43.240 like six months to kind of get regulated again. Well 0:07:43.280 --> 0:07:47.480 it was like a year and a half plus and 0:07:48.120 --> 0:07:52.120 four rounds of clod and six months of progesterone, which 0:07:52.120 --> 0:07:57.000 makes you feel pretty terrible, it does. And finally, like 0:07:57.600 --> 0:08:01.280 you know that that just whole journey is just really frustrating. 0:08:01.320 --> 0:08:03.040 Tell me about that season, Like how you feel in 0:08:03.080 --> 0:08:05.040 that season, Like tell me like the different stages, because 0:08:05.040 --> 0:08:06.800 I know you, like it's for me, it was stages 0:08:06.800 --> 0:08:08.720 like in the beginning, you're kind of like lighthearted about it, 0:08:08.800 --> 0:08:11.600 like okay, like yeah, it takes a while, that's fine. Yeah, 0:08:11.720 --> 0:08:14.440 I think the first like I was fine until about 0:08:14.560 --> 0:08:17.560 six months and then I started getting like that and 0:08:17.680 --> 0:08:21.520 after six months, I was like really just kind of frustrated, 0:08:22.200 --> 0:08:24.520 and like, I guess the couple of things that got 0:08:24.560 --> 0:08:27.840 me through are like one, my faith and to knowing 0:08:27.880 --> 0:08:32.000 that like I was never opposed to like adopting or anything, 0:08:32.040 --> 0:08:33.640 so I knew like one way or another, I was 0:08:33.679 --> 0:08:35.360 going to be a mom. So like that was like 0:08:36.040 --> 0:08:38.520 it was just like wow, this really sucks, but I 0:08:38.559 --> 0:08:41.120 know this is not like this is just part of 0:08:41.160 --> 0:08:44.079 the journey, however it ends up. How did you feel 0:08:44.080 --> 0:08:46.360 though after the six months happened, Because I know, for me, 0:08:46.480 --> 0:08:50.160 like we had a dear friend, Brie lending and like 0:08:50.240 --> 0:08:53.679 I had just confided in you guys, like my closest friends. 0:08:53.679 --> 0:08:56.120 Like I think it was like you, Andrea and Bree 0:08:56.400 --> 0:08:58.000 that I had to hit that six month mark. And 0:08:58.080 --> 0:09:00.520 I was like, I think I cried everything now, but 0:09:00.600 --> 0:09:03.080 like I was so frustrated because I'm like, it's just 0:09:03.200 --> 0:09:06.080 never going to happen, and like I felt so frustrated, 0:09:06.120 --> 0:09:07.719 and I was like, everyone's just getting pregnant and I 0:09:07.720 --> 0:09:09.920 can't get pregnant. And at that very same moment, Bree 0:09:09.920 --> 0:09:11.800 had just found out she was pregnant and got pregnant 0:09:11.840 --> 0:09:14.240 first try, and it's like you are so happy for them, 0:09:14.280 --> 0:09:15.920 and then you feel so weird because you're in this 0:09:16.080 --> 0:09:19.400 really sad place and it's like everyone starts popping up 0:09:19.440 --> 0:09:22.880 pregnant and literally it's a blessing and a miracle, and 0:09:22.920 --> 0:09:25.920 you have so much love for all the women getting pregnant, 0:09:25.960 --> 0:09:27.839 but you're like, why am I not getting pregnant? Why 0:09:27.920 --> 0:09:30.320 is it not happening? And I had just taken my 0:09:30.360 --> 0:09:33.360 I d out like um, maybe like a week or 0:09:33.360 --> 0:09:36.679 two before Brie, And so I mean, like, like you said, 0:09:36.720 --> 0:09:40.560 I'm so happy for her, like like, and I didn't 0:09:40.600 --> 0:09:42.599 really expect to get pregnant on the first Chary or 0:09:42.640 --> 0:09:44.960 even the second or the third. Like I felt like 0:09:45.000 --> 0:09:47.079 I knew it was going to take a little bit 0:09:47.080 --> 0:09:49.280 of time, but I did not know it was going 0:09:49.320 --> 0:09:52.880 to take like almost two years. Because I remember having 0:09:52.920 --> 0:09:55.160 one like really heart about conversation with you, like right 0:09:55.160 --> 0:09:57.560 before you got pregnant, and you were like it was 0:09:57.600 --> 0:10:00.640 like a hard moment, you know. I was like I 0:10:00.640 --> 0:10:02.680 would go through like waves like you said, and like 0:10:02.720 --> 0:10:04.480 I would be okay some of the time. And then 0:10:05.160 --> 0:10:09.080 one time we went to church and we like it 0:10:09.120 --> 0:10:12.160 was super crowded and we ended up sitting on the 0:10:12.160 --> 0:10:14.960 wrong side whatever, the wrong side is not our normal side. 0:10:15.640 --> 0:10:18.200 And I looked around and I we were we were 0:10:18.240 --> 0:10:20.760 like in the middle somehow we had I had never 0:10:20.800 --> 0:10:22.200 noticed that we sat in the middle of like the 0:10:22.240 --> 0:10:25.560 family section, like back left, all the kids, and we 0:10:25.559 --> 0:10:27.360 were just like sitting in there, and I was like, 0:10:27.840 --> 0:10:30.200 oh wow, and I just like lost it and like 0:10:30.240 --> 0:10:32.520 started crying and I was like I don't I can't 0:10:32.520 --> 0:10:35.120 never sit on this side again. This is like until 0:10:35.240 --> 0:10:37.120 I have my own family because this is a way 0:10:37.200 --> 0:10:39.440 too hard. And what is that? Because it's like what 0:10:39.600 --> 0:10:41.520 is that feeling? Because you never know you could experience 0:10:41.520 --> 0:10:43.440 that until you're in it. Yeah, is it just like 0:10:44.080 --> 0:10:45.920 is it the feeling that like you're never gonna get it? 0:10:46.040 --> 0:10:47.959 Or like is it that you want it so badly? 0:10:47.960 --> 0:10:50.319 And I think it's just like wanting it so badly 0:10:50.360 --> 0:10:56.400 because like I really like and almost like I mean jealousy, 0:10:56.760 --> 0:10:59.760 like totally like just like you hate that you're jealous 0:10:59.840 --> 0:11:03.080 and yeah, and like like it's so it's such a 0:11:03.120 --> 0:11:05.920 weird thing, like like you're so happy for your friend, 0:11:06.120 --> 0:11:08.480 but you're just like jealous. It's not you and I 0:11:08.559 --> 0:11:13.480 really try to not should not be jealous. And so 0:11:13.600 --> 0:11:16.000 that's like that was that's like a hard thing to accept. 0:11:16.000 --> 0:11:18.199 You're like why do I feel like this? And it's 0:11:18.440 --> 0:11:21.200 burning feeling and it makes you just like then you're 0:11:21.200 --> 0:11:23.720 like disappointed in yourself that you feel like that, that 0:11:23.800 --> 0:11:25.640 you let yourself get to that point and like you 0:11:25.679 --> 0:11:28.760 can't help it because you want it so badly and 0:11:28.800 --> 0:11:31.480 you don't want their child, you don't want their blessing 0:11:31.480 --> 0:11:33.400 to go away. You just want it for your total 0:11:34.600 --> 0:11:39.600 more than anything. Yeah, it is. And I have like 0:11:39.920 --> 0:11:42.160 loved being able to talk about this on this platform 0:11:42.160 --> 0:11:44.080 and like, I'm so grateful that you will talk about 0:11:44.080 --> 0:11:46.760 it and other women because so many women. Once I've 0:11:46.760 --> 0:11:50.160 started like talking about it, you realize how common this is. 0:11:50.440 --> 0:11:52.280 It is so hard to get pregnant. Some people get 0:11:52.320 --> 0:11:54.959 pregnant right away and that is such a blessing. Others 0:11:55.040 --> 0:11:57.600 it is a journey, and like it sometimes it never 0:11:57.640 --> 0:11:59.640 even happens. And then you're in this journey and you're 0:11:59.679 --> 0:12:02.760 like why why I just like you just cannot wrap 0:12:02.760 --> 0:12:05.000 your head around why it's not you and what everyone 0:12:05.000 --> 0:12:06.680 else is getting it. It's like why are they winning 0:12:06.720 --> 0:12:09.079 the power Ball and I'm not. Yeah, And then it's 0:12:09.120 --> 0:12:11.160 weird like being on the other side of it now, 0:12:11.400 --> 0:12:13.680 like the light at the end of the tunnel, and 0:12:14.520 --> 0:12:18.360 like at first you kind of almost like, I mean, 0:12:18.360 --> 0:12:20.760 I have other friends that have been struggling to get pregnant, 0:12:21.040 --> 0:12:24.360 and you like almost don't want to feel so happy 0:12:24.440 --> 0:12:26.680 for yourself because you don't want to make anybody else 0:12:26.720 --> 0:12:32.240 feel sad for for themselves, you know, And that is 0:12:32.280 --> 0:12:35.840 also a hard thing, like because yeah, you want and 0:12:35.920 --> 0:12:38.360 you want that for everybody you know that wants that 0:12:38.480 --> 0:12:43.199 for themselves. So I know, I know it's just a 0:12:43.240 --> 0:12:48.160 hard it's just a hard journey. It is, Yeah, But 0:12:48.679 --> 0:12:51.000 I always have like thought this. I don't know if 0:12:51.000 --> 0:12:54.240 this is pessimistic or just I don't know, but I've 0:12:54.280 --> 0:12:56.760 always thought, like, you know, if it's not one thing, 0:12:56.880 --> 0:13:01.360 it's another. So like on the like to pregnancy and 0:13:01.760 --> 0:13:04.880 having children, and it's like you never know what hardship 0:13:04.920 --> 0:13:06.959 you're going to go through at what point, So like 0:13:07.120 --> 0:13:10.000 this is just part of the story, and like it 0:13:10.120 --> 0:13:13.240 wasn't easy, but here we are, and if it wouldn't 0:13:13.240 --> 0:13:15.360 have been this, it could have been something else exactly. 0:13:15.760 --> 0:13:17.480 I mean I've talked to you about that too, because 0:13:17.520 --> 0:13:21.120 like right now, Sonny, like she's like coming into personality. 0:13:21.200 --> 0:13:23.680 We're getting vaccines, and like there's all that fear about 0:13:23.679 --> 0:13:26.000 like autism and all sorts of stuff. But it's just like, Okay, 0:13:26.080 --> 0:13:28.240 you can worry about like autism because that pops up 0:13:28.280 --> 0:13:30.640 right now in the beginning phases. And then so you 0:13:30.679 --> 0:13:32.920 get through that phase, then it's like, oh my gosh, 0:13:32.920 --> 0:13:38.240 what about drugs and alcohol driving and school shootings and 0:13:39.080 --> 0:13:42.520 I mean freaking a tornado hits your town. You know, 0:13:42.559 --> 0:13:44.679 it's just like what is next, Like if if it's 0:13:44.720 --> 0:13:50.160 not one thing, it's another, So really like why worry? Yeah, exactly, 0:13:50.360 --> 0:13:52.400 because like you can worry yourself sick and then something 0:13:52.440 --> 0:13:54.880 else is coming right behind it. And the things that 0:13:54.920 --> 0:13:57.560 you really worry about sometimes aren't even what you deal 0:13:57.600 --> 0:14:02.600 with totally, you know, right yep. It's so it's like 0:14:02.840 --> 0:14:06.120 you're worrying. You're like that's so fear based, you know, 0:14:07.040 --> 0:14:10.280 and not like the truth. So how do you get 0:14:10.280 --> 0:14:12.760 out of that fear based mentality? Gosh, I don't know. 0:14:13.320 --> 0:14:17.720 I mean praying, I mean that, I don't know, praying 0:14:17.840 --> 0:14:24.360 and just trying to be like optimistic and not letting 0:14:24.480 --> 0:14:29.000 like that all that like just fear sink in and 0:14:29.040 --> 0:14:31.840 just trying to like just trying to think about like 0:14:31.960 --> 0:14:34.800 life is our our a journey, I guess, And it's 0:14:34.840 --> 0:14:37.200 just not it's not like just an easy straight road. 0:14:37.240 --> 0:14:41.480 It's just a little windy and everybody everybody has like 0:14:41.520 --> 0:14:44.240 their struggles that they go through. So like even if 0:14:44.360 --> 0:14:48.480 like someone else looks like they have like you know, 0:14:48.480 --> 0:14:50.320 it was very easy for them to get pregnant, and 0:14:50.320 --> 0:14:52.520 like it's just everybody has one thing or another that 0:14:52.520 --> 0:14:55.960 they're worried about, struggling with whatever. So we're all just 0:14:56.040 --> 0:14:57.760 kind of like human in in it together, you know. 0:14:58.440 --> 0:15:01.600 So you have that awareness. I also have that awareness. 0:15:01.640 --> 0:15:03.120 But what do you do when you're in the valley? 0:15:03.200 --> 0:15:05.680 Because I have found myself Like when I was younger, 0:15:06.840 --> 0:15:09.160 I look back and I know everything is relative. I'm like, dang, 0:15:09.240 --> 0:15:12.320 stuff I was stressing about. Girl, Oh, I wasn't even 0:15:12.320 --> 0:15:14.760 stressing about that. But now I'm like, when you start 0:15:14.760 --> 0:15:16.840 bringing a life into the world and you're married and 0:15:16.920 --> 0:15:19.160 you have a house payment, and you have jobs and 0:15:19.200 --> 0:15:22.200 you are not supporting your family, and then you're supporting 0:15:22.200 --> 0:15:25.120 a child and you have like careers and it's all 0:15:25.120 --> 0:15:27.840 the stuff like stuff so that kids like freaking real. Yea, 0:15:28.160 --> 0:15:31.400 what do you tell yourself when you're in those stressful seasons, 0:15:32.480 --> 0:15:34.360 even though you know it's a journey and it's a 0:15:34.360 --> 0:15:38.160 bigger picture, I don't know, it's like so hard to navigate. Sometimes. 0:15:38.760 --> 0:15:41.640 I feel like we're really lucky with like our friends 0:15:41.640 --> 0:15:44.040 in Nashville that we have like a super great community 0:15:44.080 --> 0:15:47.600 of people that are actually like so real and can 0:15:47.640 --> 0:15:50.160 be like honest with each other. So just like relying 0:15:50.280 --> 0:15:55.680 on friends and like God, and that's it, like and 0:15:56.040 --> 0:16:00.280 of course my sweet husband, like that's just like trying 0:16:00.280 --> 0:16:03.960 to and you know, working at a hospital gives me 0:16:04.040 --> 0:16:06.360 like a real good dose of reality pretty you know, 0:16:06.760 --> 0:16:13.520 like just seeing uh, like all the real hardships that 0:16:13.600 --> 0:16:18.360 are not that like true hardships, you know, physical physical 0:16:18.440 --> 0:16:23.560 hardships and like people rebuilding their bodies and strokes. Yeah, 0:16:23.680 --> 0:16:27.520 and like it's so sad and like yeah, just like 0:16:28.520 --> 0:16:31.960 you know, adults who have been abused and like I 0:16:32.040 --> 0:16:34.320 don't know just all of that. I'm just like, wow, 0:16:34.520 --> 0:16:36.640 I sent Bill a text message last week. I'm like, 0:16:37.040 --> 0:16:40.200 what I think it's hard right now is so not hard, 0:16:40.800 --> 0:16:43.680 you know, And like that I think helps me keep 0:16:43.720 --> 0:16:47.080 it in perspective how like grateful, how lucky and like 0:16:47.200 --> 0:16:50.800 blessed we are and how that's not you know, so 0:16:50.880 --> 0:16:53.760 even like when things feel stressful and hard, they're just 0:16:53.800 --> 0:16:56.240 like just keeping it in perspective that our life is 0:16:56.240 --> 0:17:00.560 pretty dang good. I know. I know I'm talking with 0:17:00.600 --> 0:17:04.359 that right now because I am and anyone who listens 0:17:04.359 --> 0:17:06.600 to this podcast knows I am always trying to find 0:17:06.600 --> 0:17:08.600 the positive. I'm always trying to see the light within 0:17:08.640 --> 0:17:11.479 the tunnel, Like I feel so blessed in my life 0:17:12.040 --> 0:17:15.080 and right now I'm in a very stressful season with 0:17:15.240 --> 0:17:17.880 just like trying to get my career going, Like I'm 0:17:17.880 --> 0:17:19.960 putting so much work into my career and like just 0:17:20.000 --> 0:17:22.840 trying to get it going because you have to pay bills. 0:17:23.880 --> 0:17:26.440 Our husbands are in a band and they're amazing, and 0:17:26.440 --> 0:17:28.560 it's like they have this very creative job and then 0:17:28.560 --> 0:17:30.960 it makes them be gone and like it makes their 0:17:30.960 --> 0:17:34.240 schedules different and just like never nothing is ever consistent, 0:17:34.280 --> 0:17:37.119 which is what we love about them. Now you have 0:17:37.119 --> 0:17:38.800 a life in the world and it's like thinking about 0:17:38.800 --> 0:17:40.600 all these things for her and you have one coming, 0:17:40.600 --> 0:17:42.879 and like I just feel like I have so many 0:17:43.400 --> 0:17:44.720 and this is just some of them. These are like 0:17:44.760 --> 0:17:46.359 my main ones. I have so many like balls in 0:17:46.359 --> 0:17:49.359 the air that I feel like I don't know how 0:17:49.359 --> 0:17:53.560 to catch them all. And it's not that I'm not grateful, 0:17:53.720 --> 0:17:56.679 because I am grateful, but it's like I'm stressed, and 0:17:56.720 --> 0:17:59.040 like I just let myself being a moment these past 0:17:59.119 --> 0:18:01.480 couple of days actually where I just like I'm speaking 0:18:01.480 --> 0:18:03.520 out loud where it's like I am happy and I 0:18:03.560 --> 0:18:06.840 am blessed, Like I'm stressed right now and like I 0:18:06.880 --> 0:18:08.959 think that's okay to feel that every now and then 0:18:09.000 --> 0:18:11.000 because I'm always trying to push through it and get 0:18:11.040 --> 0:18:12.800 to the blessing and get to the light. But like 0:18:13.320 --> 0:18:18.240 sometimes you're just freaking overwhelmed and it's hard. It's just 0:18:18.280 --> 0:18:20.440 like I think it's okay to be there, Like obviously 0:18:20.440 --> 0:18:22.320 you've got to figure out ways to get out of it. 0:18:22.359 --> 0:18:27.080 But those are seasons, you know. And like you said 0:18:27.080 --> 0:18:30.760 that like perspective, like there are real problems in life, 0:18:30.760 --> 0:18:33.680 and so it's like, okay, be grateful, get stay in check. 0:18:33.760 --> 0:18:39.640 But like it's God, life is like real on any level. Yep. 0:18:40.160 --> 0:18:44.960 So how have you navigated working, being pregnant. Now you're 0:18:44.960 --> 0:18:47.480 about to have this baby, You're going to continue working, 0:18:48.160 --> 0:18:53.040 you are finding a nanny, and like that's a whole 0:18:53.080 --> 0:18:55.080 new chapter like a working mom, Like what is that 0:18:55.119 --> 0:18:57.600 going to look like? I don't know, we'll see And 0:18:57.760 --> 0:19:02.439 how are your feelings about all that? Um uh, I'm torn. 0:19:02.800 --> 0:19:08.040 I mean, so being pregnant and working has been fine luckily, 0:19:08.359 --> 0:19:13.399 Like my job has been super great and flexible and 0:19:13.440 --> 0:19:16.080 so like I have been able to work like a 0:19:16.119 --> 0:19:18.480 lot of time alongside like a partner. Do you have 0:19:18.480 --> 0:19:20.639 a physical job yeah, Like I do a lot of 0:19:20.720 --> 0:19:24.280 lifting and like, and it's like super emotionally demanding. But 0:19:24.320 --> 0:19:27.439 I've been able to have a partner, so like have 0:19:27.520 --> 0:19:30.560 a physical therapist with me, so we can, like I 0:19:30.600 --> 0:19:32.879 can let somebody else take a lot of like heavy lifting, 0:19:32.880 --> 0:19:35.520 and I'm just asking for help more. But because I've 0:19:35.560 --> 0:19:38.119 been new for you to ask for helper, are you 0:19:38.119 --> 0:19:40.359 okay to ask for help? Yeah, it's new to like 0:19:40.680 --> 0:19:43.000 not be able to feel like I can give, Like 0:19:43.359 --> 0:19:45.080 this is a percent of my effort that I can 0:19:45.119 --> 0:19:47.840 give right now, but it's not of my normal effort, 0:19:48.240 --> 0:19:51.080 you know, So just like being okay with that, And 0:19:51.160 --> 0:19:54.679 like I took that indiogram test yesterday and I'm a 0:19:55.480 --> 0:19:58.560 two with a one wing. One wing, so helper with 0:19:58.640 --> 0:20:01.800 the perfectionist wing. Yeah, so perfectionist. So like and you're 0:20:02.280 --> 0:20:05.360 connect and neck with like perfectionism too. Yeah yeah, so 0:20:05.520 --> 0:20:07.560 that's kind of like hard for me. I'm like, Okay, 0:20:07.600 --> 0:20:09.719 this is just I just have to realize, like this 0:20:09.800 --> 0:20:11.359 is the best that I can do right now. Like 0:20:11.400 --> 0:20:13.720 I don't feel like I'm like I'm not slacking off 0:20:13.800 --> 0:20:17.880 or anything, but I'm not probably like you know, you know, 0:20:18.080 --> 0:20:20.479 your regular body can do more but you can't do 0:20:20.520 --> 0:20:22.959 that right now. Yeah, and even just like you know, 0:20:23.080 --> 0:20:27.000