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Speaker 1: Okay, well, hello Catherine, Hi Chelsea, how are you. I'm

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Speaker 1: pretty good. I spent the weekend last weekend with my

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Speaker 1: parents who were passing through Californian. My husband and I

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Speaker 1: went up and stayed with them in Newhole Ranch near

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Speaker 1: Santa Clarita, which was all cowboy themed. My dad, as

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Speaker 1: you know, it was a big cowboy. Um. Yeah, the

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Speaker 1: whole the whole town was like cowboy themed. It was

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Speaker 1: very fun. I mean, if you want to see cowboys,

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Speaker 1: can't you just watch Yellowstone? Yeah? You know what, I

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Speaker 1: just need to do it. I do need to buite

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Speaker 1: the bullet and watch Yellowstone. Yeah yeah, Yellowstone is is

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Speaker 1: where all the cowboys are at. People in Whistler love

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Speaker 1: Yellowstone and my girlfriend Wendy Grilloh well sorry, Wendy monies

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Speaker 1: as on the show Yellowstone, and so I am legally

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Speaker 1: obligated to watch that out of friendship. So but she's

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Speaker 1: so good in it, and the show just got nominated

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Speaker 1: for a bunch of like awards, SAG Awards. So yeah,

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Speaker 1: really no reason not to watch a Catherine at this point. Okay,

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Speaker 1: after I brought it up, I've been home for a

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Speaker 1: week from Whistler or two weeks. I'm a little break

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Speaker 1: because I had some business to tend to in the

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Speaker 1: l A area, and it was very hard for me

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Speaker 1: to leave Whistler. I'm not gonna lie. My only incentivization

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Speaker 1: really was seeing Burton Bernice and coming home to them

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Speaker 1: and making sure that they still know who I am,

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Speaker 1: which they do, and they're actually really really cute and

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Speaker 1: they really love Joe now, so it's really sweet. Like

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Speaker 1: Bernice is is a little bit of a huja, you know,

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Speaker 1: she only likes men. She doesn't support she does not

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Speaker 1: support other women. She is not a champion of women.

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Speaker 1: And she started following him around. And then I said, but,

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Speaker 1: I said bert, I said, it's confusing because I call

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Speaker 1: them all Buddha. I called Joe Buddha. I don't think

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Speaker 1: I love that is squeezable is a Buddha? Where does

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Speaker 1: that come from? Just like bud I don't know. Like

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Speaker 1: I call my dogs Buddhas. I call my nieces and nephews,

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Speaker 1: you know, and I'm like pinching their bodies, well I

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Speaker 1: do a little bit more than their cheeks. But I

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Speaker 1: call everything that I love Buddha's. So I don't know

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Speaker 1: where that comes. I'm sure it makes Joe feel very

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Speaker 1: special that he's not the only one called that. But anyway,

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Speaker 1: Bernice has taken to Joe and she followed us in

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Speaker 1: the room and I told Joe that Birt had to

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Speaker 1: sleep in the bed with us because that's yeah. And

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Speaker 1: he said, I said, does that do you like when

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Speaker 1: Bert sleeps in the bed with us? And he said, well,

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Speaker 1: I like whatever you like. And I was like, you

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Speaker 1: know what, Joe, every answer is the right answer with him,

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Speaker 1: he really does. I really am going to write a

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Speaker 1: handbook for men, because he just says. The other day

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Speaker 1: I was I was doing a zoom for like two hours,

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Speaker 1: and you know that's a little bit much for me.

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Speaker 1: Two hours straight. I was like, whoa, And I just

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Speaker 1: needed my Canada Dry, like my diet. Canada Dry is

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Speaker 1: my like elixir for everything. And he I was thinking

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Speaker 1: about I was sitting at the table and was so

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Speaker 1: and I was like, oh God, I want that. I

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Speaker 1: when can I get a break to get up and

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Speaker 1: get that an addict? And then he I am, I'm addicted,

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Speaker 1: And he all of a sudden just came upstairs, walked

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Speaker 1: right to the fridge, took out in ginger ale and

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Speaker 1: put it in front of me, and I was like,

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Speaker 1: oh my god, you're my ginger ale all mate. He's

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Speaker 1: just like, fully read your mind. He does it all

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Speaker 1: the time. He does yesterday. He goes, I I was.

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Speaker 1: I kept putting my lip bomb down and he kept

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Speaker 1: picking it up, you know, because he always wants to

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Speaker 1: have my lip bomb for me, which is so sweet

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Speaker 1: because I'm also addicted to lip Bomb Canada Dry and

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Speaker 1: lip Bomb, and I'm an elderly woman. There are worse things.

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Speaker 1: And he was like, oh, and then I had my

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Speaker 1: purse and I went to grab my purse. He goes,

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Speaker 1: I am not going to tell you this again. You

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Speaker 1: are not ever carrying anything in my presence. And I

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Speaker 1: was like, honey, you are just too much. He's a hero.

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Speaker 1: Even my own purse he refuses to let me carry.

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Speaker 1: It's so cute. I like, how many women in America

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Speaker 1: are now in love with jokoy Oh? I think so,

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Speaker 1: I think so yeah. I got a lot of a

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Speaker 1: lot of d m s about it. It's really cute.

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Speaker 1: He's so lovable, Like I'm so in yeah, I'm so

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Speaker 1: into him, And it was nice. We just did a

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Speaker 1: show in Seattle. He was performing at that Sonics where

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Speaker 1: the Sonics used to play. It's called the Climate Pledge Arena,

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Speaker 1: but it was used to be called something else. And

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Speaker 1: he saw Eddie Murphy there when he was fifteen years

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Speaker 1: old and sat in like row fifteen, and so he

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Speaker 1: was able to have like that full circle moment. And

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Speaker 1: he sold out fourteen thousand tickets, four hundred actually in

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Speaker 1: this arena. And I got on stage as like a

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Speaker 1: surprise guest, and then he got on stage and it

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Speaker 1: was like the most incredible thing to see. It was emotional,

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Speaker 1: it was amazing. The guys from Boys two Men came

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Speaker 1: out and sang with him at the end. It was

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Speaker 1: just so cool. And he got really choked up during

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Speaker 1: his performance because I'm looking at just that is such

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Speaker 1: an insane amount of people to do stand up to

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Speaker 1: tell me this. I'm curious. Is there like a different

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Speaker 1: kind of comedy that you feel like plays to those

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Speaker 1: like massive arenas versus like more intimate venues or is

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Speaker 1: it just sort of like what you can sell out,

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Speaker 1: you can sell out. Yeah, No, I do think I

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Speaker 1: thought that because I was I was going up. I

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Speaker 1: was like, fuck, I gotta buck up. I'm like fourteen

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Speaker 1: thousand people, this is a line, and then I was like,

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Speaker 1: all right, you know, and I was like, this doesn't

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Speaker 1: really play, Like what jokes do you tell? Because you're

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Speaker 1: us not convinced that that amount of people are going

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Speaker 1: to be able to hear everything you're saying, even though

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Speaker 1: it's acoustically set up for them to hear you. So

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Speaker 1: it does play. It did work, And I said that

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Speaker 1: to him. I go, you know, I've always thought that

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Speaker 1: there was too many people for stand up, like it

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Speaker 1: doesn't provide the intimacy that stand up needs. But yeah,

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Speaker 1: I think some comics wouldn't play, and that kind of

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Speaker 1: big of a thing because there are different types of comics.

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Speaker 1: But it was great and he certainly count and I

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Speaker 1: actually was like, oh, I like this too. I didn't

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Speaker 1: think I would. I thought it would be too big.

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Speaker 1: He's so easy to be happy for, and it's it's

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Speaker 1: so easy to root for, you know, he's just like

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Speaker 1: kind and wonderful, like when it's actually funny. When he

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Speaker 1: helped us out the other week setting up and he

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Speaker 1: was our he was our producer for the day. Honestly,

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Speaker 1: that was the smoothest it's ever gone. I know, you

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Speaker 1: know what I was saying, I was talking to someone

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Speaker 1: about it, and I was like, the thing I love

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Speaker 1: about him so much is that he's so engaged with

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Speaker 1: every single person he speaks to, and that he pays

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Speaker 1: attention to everyone. It doesn't matter if it's a kid

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Speaker 1: or a relative or a stranger. He's always interested and

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Speaker 1: engaged and like present, and I'm always so like, I

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Speaker 1: love that sexy. Where do you think that comes from

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Speaker 1: for him? Is that upbringing? Is that just he's just

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Speaker 1: so humble? I guess you know, he's so humble. He's

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Speaker 1: just so sweet, and he really takes people in, you know,

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Speaker 1: like I've had so many boyfriends that just never really

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Speaker 1: took in my family or took the time. Like he's

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Speaker 1: on the phone with my sisters without me, with my nieces,

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Speaker 1: he's texting. It's just so sweet. And I kind of like,

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Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, I have a team member now I'm

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Speaker 1: not just on my own. So that's that's the best

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Speaker 1: part too. That's wonderful. And he's ripped now, he's ripped

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Speaker 1: from skiing. He's like he lost six every morning I

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Speaker 1: weigh yourself. I don't understand what's going on. He would

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Speaker 1: lose a pound six ounces to a pound every day.

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Speaker 1: I was getting ready. I'm getting ready for this big

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Speaker 1: like campaign I'm doing with this athletic wear company, and

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Speaker 1: I'm like, I'm the one who needs to get my

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Speaker 1: body together, and he's just every day he's like more

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Speaker 1: and more shredded. I'm like, oh God, yeah, so hot

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Speaker 1: Joe Coiler. Watch out, guys, his underwear campaign is coming.

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Speaker 1: I'm very excited for our guest, as always, I'm always

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Speaker 1: excited for our guests because I just love doing this

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Speaker 1: podcast and seeing what people can contribute. A friend of

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Speaker 1: mine who's also a comedian, because I feel like female

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Speaker 1: comedians are pretty insightful. They have a lot of good

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Speaker 1: things to offer up, I think, and they're filled with

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Speaker 1: a lot of self confidence and self doubt, so you

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Speaker 1: get the best of both worlds. Please welcome comic and

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Speaker 1: writer Beth Stelling. So, Beth, you took a little break

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Speaker 1: after your most recent stand up special came out on

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Speaker 1: HBO Max. Right Call Her Daddy, Um, Girl Daddy, Girl Daddy, Sorry,

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Speaker 1: Ship call Her Daddy's Another podcast, So Many Dad, Too

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Speaker 1: many daddy's. It's called girl Daddy on HBO Max and

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Speaker 1: a lot of daddy's running around thinks for the queer eyes. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I did. I just I just had something weird happened.

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Speaker 1: I don't know. Obviously, the weird part was the pandemic.

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Speaker 1: I just I don't know how to explain it, and

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Speaker 1: I don't want to be depressing. Well, you know, don't

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Speaker 1: worry about that, but I'm curious to know. I mean,

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Speaker 1: that was an amazing special. You're so thoughtful, you're so smart,

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Speaker 1: you're a great stand up. Like I loved that special.

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Speaker 1: So when he told me that, I was like, oh

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Speaker 1: my god, I have to ask or why and what happened?

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Speaker 1: And don't worry about being depressing. Yes, so go back

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Speaker 1: to like starting and stand up. It was oh seven

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Speaker 1: for me, and I just remember thinking like how do

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Speaker 1: I want to do this? And I knew all the stereotypes,

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Speaker 1: and this sad part is they never leave. It's just

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Speaker 1: you know, like fourteen or fifteen years later, it's just

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Speaker 1: like women aren't funny. Women only talk about sex. And

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Speaker 1: so when I first started, I really felt like a

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Speaker 1: young person who wanted to just be part of the solution,

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Speaker 1: meaning like I'm just going to not talk about sex.

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Speaker 1: I had all these rules for myself when I first

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Speaker 1: started as a young and where I was like, I'm

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Speaker 1: not going to talk about sex. I'm not going to

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Speaker 1: hook up with the other comedians. And then I had

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Speaker 1: other dumb ones like I'm never going to take a

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Speaker 1: notebook on stage and I'm never going to repeat a joke,

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Speaker 1: and then you realize, well, that's not what stand up is.

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Speaker 1: It's so funny you say that. Let me just interject there,

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Speaker 1: because I remember when I signed with my managers, when

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Speaker 1: I was really starting out, they took me down to

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Speaker 1: Irvine to the Improv to see Janine Garoffalo and she

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Speaker 1: had our notebook on stage, and I was like, oh,

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Speaker 1: that is not professional, you know. And here I was like,

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Speaker 1: not knowing my ass from my elbow, judging somebody who

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Speaker 1: had been doing this for fifteen to twenty years already

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Speaker 1: going how could she ever do that? Cut to that's

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Speaker 1: exactly what you do when you're working out material. Let's

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Speaker 1: bring a notebook on stage. I mean they had to

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Speaker 1: convince me to not have my little notebook when I

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Speaker 1: was filming My special. I mean, I just it is

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Speaker 1: like a comfort thing. And also getting to tour with

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Speaker 1: Sarah Silverman, she always has the like this is why

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Speaker 1: I I am like this, you know, like she always

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Speaker 1: has her legal pad, and so it made it okay.

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Speaker 1: And also she I one time heard her say like

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Speaker 1: forget if somebody said something about the pad or something,

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Speaker 1: she said something like forgive my notes, Um, I don't

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Speaker 1: respect you. So it was just like it was a

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Speaker 1: way to like dispel that because because I remember being

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Speaker 1: at Laughed in Seattle after my first half hour on

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Speaker 1: Comedy Central that was like or something, and I had

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Speaker 1: my notebook with me and some guy in the crowd

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Speaker 1: at Laughed in Seattle was like, why are you reading notes?

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Speaker 1: And somebody in the audience was like, she's just like

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Speaker 1: so many different came to my defense and at that

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Speaker 1: time and my how I was on stage and my

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Speaker 1: persona or whatever, I actually kind of needed them to

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Speaker 1: come to my defense because I was just I'm so

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Speaker 1: sensitive and they're like, she just were filmed special, she's

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Speaker 1: just working stuff out, like leave her alone. I always

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Speaker 1: just say I'm doing my taxes. I mean, I love that.

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Speaker 1: And also I remember opening for Verbiclea even when he

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Speaker 1: was at the Irvine. He was letting me run my

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Speaker 1: half hour before the stand ups on Netflix, and he

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Speaker 1: was it was called working it out at the time,

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Speaker 1: and somebody yelled at him from the crowd, even, what

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Speaker 1: do you why are you reading that? It's so funny

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Speaker 1: because like people have this idea of stand up of

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Speaker 1: what it's supposed to be, and I guess they still

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Speaker 1: believe that we're just like coming up with it all

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Speaker 1: off the top of our head. And in some ways

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Speaker 1: you are, you know, if you're doing crowd work or improvising.

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Speaker 1: But I had all these little ideas when I started,

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Speaker 1: and I didn't like going up a bit. It open

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Speaker 1: my twenty two years old Chicago seeing a girl go

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Speaker 1: on stage and just talk about getting like butt fucked

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Speaker 1: and ship going everywhere, And to me, I was like,

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Speaker 1: it's not that I was a prude or I thought

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Speaker 1: like it was more me being judgmental and thinking like,

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Speaker 1: why are you doing this to us? Why are you

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Speaker 1: going up there, and just leaning into the stereotype. It's

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Speaker 1: just exhibitionists. Where's the joke? You know? I'm being all

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Speaker 1: very on my high horse. And as time went on,

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Speaker 1: I tried to stick to that because I thought, well,

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna beat this stereotype by just being funny, and

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Speaker 1: by being funny as a woman and not talking about sex.

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Speaker 1: That's feminist because it will show that that is what

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Speaker 1: we can do and be. And so I stuck to

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Speaker 1: that for a long time until really this last hour.

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Speaker 1: It's not that I never talked about anything sexual, but

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Speaker 1: this last hour. At the beginnings of it, I remember

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Speaker 1: being at the Funny Bone in Dayton, and that's what

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Speaker 1: I mean. I'm from Dayton, Ohio, so I have like

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Speaker 1: my friends family in the front row. I have my

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Speaker 1: whole family, their teachers that I grew up with, and

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Speaker 1: a lot of this stuff I wanted to talk about

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Speaker 1: was sex and like not dirty what I believe to

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Speaker 1: be exhibitionists and not okay like but jokes. Like I

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Speaker 1: felt like I held it in for so long that

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Speaker 1: I earned it. That was like, no, I'm going to

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Speaker 1: talk about it because I'm so tired of not and

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Speaker 1: I can do it well. So I fought that for

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Speaker 1: a long time, and the early parts of it, of

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Speaker 1: course weren't as funny as I wanted them to be.

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Speaker 1: So that was an uncomfortable weekend beat, like doing the

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Speaker 1: sex stuff in front of those people until I'm working

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Speaker 1: out the jokes until they're good enough. So that was

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Speaker 1: already the entry into this hour. I felt obviously I

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Speaker 1: guess we could name it as like shame or I

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Speaker 1: don't even know. And then once I felt good about

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Speaker 1: it and I was really rolling with it. A lot

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Speaker 1: of it was driven by anger by watching male comics

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Speaker 1: specials and then almost writing retorts to them. Yeah, because

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Speaker 1: I feel irritated that even though it's been so long

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Speaker 1: and women have been funny for so long, for decades,

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Speaker 1: that we're still not granted individuality when we walk on

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Speaker 1: stage like men are. So it just bothered me that

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Speaker 1: they don't get named social justice warriors for talking about

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Speaker 1: some of the same topics that were mulling over or

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Speaker 1: trying to create jokes out of. So yeah, that bothered me,

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Speaker 1: and I wrote a lot of retorts to that. So

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Speaker 1: it was almost fueled by rage. And then but that

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Speaker 1: was before I filmed March seven, so I filmed truly

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Speaker 1: the weekend before the world sort of shut down. I

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Speaker 1: remember you and I had a conversation and we at

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Speaker 1: my production company because we were talking about you filming

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Speaker 1: or special and we were talking about certain male comics,

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Speaker 1: and you were actually debating about going after someone I

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Speaker 1: don't even remember who, or you know, calling him out specifically,

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Speaker 1: and I was like, that's a great idea of it.

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Speaker 1: I was like, yeah, yeah, exactly, So I mean that

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Speaker 1: does take guts and balls, and like, I love that.

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Speaker 1: I think that's brave. Well, thank you. That means a

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Speaker 1: lot coming from you. I definitely don't regret it at all.

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Speaker 1: I think I'm just like I looked at like even

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Speaker 1: during the pandemic, I watched Richard Pryor, so like back

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Speaker 1: when I started, I didn't watch a ton of stand

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Speaker 1: up because I was terrified of stealing, you know, in

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Speaker 1: that same naive way that when you first start, you're like,

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Speaker 1: I better not putting in my material online because people

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Speaker 1: might steal it. It's like nobody wants it, you're not funny.

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Speaker 1: But I just was terrified of stealing someone's persona or

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Speaker 1: jokes or anything. So I didn't watch. I wasn't a

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Speaker 1: student of stand up and I never really like dreamed

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Speaker 1: of being when growing up. I kind of just wanted

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Speaker 1: to be an actress. So I watched in the pandemic

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Speaker 1: Prior's like Long Beach set from seventy nine, and I

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Speaker 1: had never been like a huge Prior fan because I

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Speaker 1: just didn't watch a ton of it. And then as

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Speaker 1: I was watching it, I thought it was incredible, and

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Speaker 1: I was also saddened because he's talking about police brutality

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Speaker 1: and at the time, I'm sure that was potentially scary

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Speaker 1: and controversial. And then what made me even sadder is

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Speaker 1: how long it's been and nothing's changed. So I began

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Speaker 1: to feel really depressed and downtrodden about the fact that

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Speaker 1: what we think we do might change people and it doesn't.

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Speaker 1: So I know I've reached people. I'm like, I also

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Speaker 1: don't want to be like a sad sack. That's like,

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Speaker 1: why what I do doesn't make a difference, because I

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Speaker 1: know I have. I have had cool people come up

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Speaker 1: to me afterwards and say so, so I know it

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Speaker 1: means something. I just think after it came out it

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Speaker 1: was in August, I just didn't feel like much changed.

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Speaker 1: I don't know, and it's not like I expected. It's

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Speaker 1: not like I think so highly with myself by that

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Speaker 1: it would change the world or something. I know what

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Speaker 1: you mean, though, I you know, when you're going into

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Speaker 1: like an artistic endeavor like these, you know, a stand

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Speaker 1: up special is a big endeavor. It's you, you, you,

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Speaker 1: and you. There's nowhere else to blame anything on. So

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Speaker 1: and when you're it's an undertaking, because I remember my

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Speaker 1: special evolution came out like shortly right after yours, so

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Speaker 1: I was watching yours like closely because we had had

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Speaker 1: that conversation too. And I think it's so true that

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Speaker 1: you think that you're always kind of disappointed by the

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Speaker 1: reaction something gets. I mean, when are we ever pleased

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Speaker 1: with the reaction something gets? You know? I get my

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Speaker 1: podcast numbers every month. I'm like, oh my god, I

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Speaker 1: can't believe all these people are listening to this podcast.

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Speaker 1: This is the easiest thing I've ever done with almost

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Speaker 1: no intention, you know, I'm just having like conversations. I'm like, oh,

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Speaker 1: is it is that what you're supposed to do, how

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Speaker 1: you're supposed to handle everything with just kind of off

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Speaker 1: the seat of your pants. But I think what you're saying, hey,

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Speaker 1: I can relate to on so many levels about wanting

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Speaker 1: to listen to other comedy stand up, specifically because you

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Speaker 1: don't want to mimic others accidentally, because you can do

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Speaker 1: it so accidentally anyway. But the one thing I've learned

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Speaker 1: over the last many years is we all are talking

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Speaker 1: about the same ship. It doesn't make you less of

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Speaker 1: a comic it's you know, it's all of our what's

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Speaker 1: our angle? Everyone is talking about sex and parents and

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Speaker 1: family and religion and anal and whatever you're talking about.

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Speaker 1: It's it's not unique the subject matter. What's unique is

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Speaker 1: your take on it, or your strength or your weaknesses

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Speaker 1: or you know, your p o V. So that's something

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Speaker 1: we always have to remind ourselves of, right, Yeah, And

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Speaker 1: I think that's what got me. Sorry, I just and also,

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Speaker 1: of course everything with what felt like, you know, this

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Speaker 1: racial recording in that early which of course I felt

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Speaker 1: like what do I have to add? So so that

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Speaker 1: also contributed to it where I felt like I should

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Speaker 1: just shut up and it. And then I was further

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Speaker 1: added TATD by some of the people who I had

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Speaker 1: originally been fueled with some of that material because they

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Speaker 1: didn't shut up. And it's like you're just gonna keep

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Speaker 1: tweeting and you're just gonna keep making jokes that are

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Speaker 1: so trivial about some of these like really important things

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Speaker 1: like why can't we all why can't you guys just

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Speaker 1: sit down? I even felt that way materialized or just

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Speaker 1: everybody during the pandemic, where I was sort of like,

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Speaker 1: oh good, the world telling us to take a nap,

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Speaker 1: but all these kids are getting up and running around.

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Speaker 1: I'm like, could you guys just fucking lay down for

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Speaker 1: a bit, you know. And then from home, everybody's doing

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Speaker 1: stand up shows and getting green screens, and I realized

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Speaker 1: that's pivoting and like taking charge of career. And so

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Speaker 1: I think I just was going through something personally that

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Speaker 1: made me feel like we can we all just please

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Speaker 1: rest because we're supposed to, Or maybe I just went

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Speaker 1: so hard for so long when the world said stopped,

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Speaker 1: I was like, oh, thank you. Yeah. I think a

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Speaker 1: lot of people thought that way for sure, Yeah, which

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Speaker 1: stopped me from writing. And and there's so much content,

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Speaker 1: so so like when we're supposed to be resting and

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Speaker 1: then you open your phone, it's like everybody's doing stuff

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Speaker 1: from home from a green screen, doing these things, and

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Speaker 1: I'm like sitting here, thinking, already, you know this after

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Speaker 1: a special comes out. You know, I've never given birth,

395
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Speaker 1: but but it sometimes did feel like that you just

396
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Speaker 1: can't control once it gets away from you and then

397
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Speaker 1: it's gone, and people's immediate reaction is that was so good,

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Speaker 1: I can't wait for the next one. And instead of

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Speaker 1: me taking that as like thank you. I'm going there

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Speaker 1: is no next one. That took me so long. And

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Speaker 1: then I'm also just looking at people's special feeling like

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Speaker 1: shouldn't it be special? You know, instead of what was

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Speaker 1: just you on your podcast, you've now put into a

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Speaker 1: special And so people were watching going well, I've already

405
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Speaker 1: heard that, and I'm over here thinking like I don't

406
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Speaker 1: want to be some sort of like sound like some

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Speaker 1: sort of martyr. That's like, aren't we supposed to work

408
00:19:48,320 --> 00:19:50,080
Speaker 1: on our craft for so long? Because it's just like

409
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Speaker 1: that's part of what's changed is and I should adapt.

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Speaker 1: I'm basically not adapting, I think, is what is happening.

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Speaker 1: I'm going I meticulously work on jokes for years and

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Speaker 1: then I will give you something special, and I can't

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Speaker 1: really participate that any longer. I'm sure. It's It's almost

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Speaker 1: reminds me of the guy I dated in Chicago who

415
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Speaker 1: was a photographer who went to school for photography, and

416
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Speaker 1: then Instagram happened. It's like, what the fuck? I'm like

417
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Speaker 1: developing photos for people to get, you know, way more

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Speaker 1: attention followers jobs work from just a filter. But yeah,

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Speaker 1: I think I am just sort of not keeping up. Well,

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Speaker 1: that's a product of social media. Right, that's the impact

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Speaker 1: that social media has on each of us and how

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Speaker 1: we deal with it. You wouldn't be thinking those things

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Speaker 1: about yourself if you weren't looking at other people and

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Speaker 1: what they were doing. Absolutely, and I don't like it.

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Speaker 1: I don't like how that feels. Like. I'm someone who

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Speaker 1: does believe there is room for everybody and you shouldn't

427
00:20:47,640 --> 00:20:50,520
Speaker 1: be out there comparing yourself to others. But I just

428
00:20:50,600 --> 00:20:53,560
Speaker 1: think it's hard when it feels like it's part of

429
00:20:53,560 --> 00:20:56,720
Speaker 1: the job now, and and then if I am resistant

430
00:20:56,760 --> 00:20:59,400
Speaker 1: to it, then it makes me seem like some sort

431
00:20:59,400 --> 00:21:03,360
Speaker 1: of bitter person who's just doesn't feel like they're successful enough,

432
00:21:03,840 --> 00:21:05,720
Speaker 1: when what I really want to do is create stuff

433
00:21:05,720 --> 00:21:08,520
Speaker 1: that I care about, that is good, that matters. And

434
00:21:08,680 --> 00:21:10,919
Speaker 1: I think sometimes I'm a little too precious about all

435
00:21:10,960 --> 00:21:14,000
Speaker 1: of it. Yeah, I hear what you're saying. Yeah, it

436
00:21:14,000 --> 00:21:17,240
Speaker 1: would probably do you some good to just not pay attention,

437
00:21:17,280 --> 00:21:19,880
Speaker 1: you know, like keep your head in your stuff and

438
00:21:19,920 --> 00:21:23,479
Speaker 1: focus on your stuff without looking around, even like cutting

439
00:21:23,480 --> 00:21:25,720
Speaker 1: that stuff in a half. Because there's no positive impact

440
00:21:25,720 --> 00:21:28,439
Speaker 1: from looking at social media. There hasn't been anything proven

441
00:21:28,560 --> 00:21:31,199
Speaker 1: that that that anything positive comes out of it, and

442
00:21:31,200 --> 00:21:34,639
Speaker 1: we're we're all victims of it. We're all victims of

443
00:21:34,920 --> 00:21:38,080
Speaker 1: crolling mindlessly. I mean, I wanted to a test on

444
00:21:38,119 --> 00:21:41,040
Speaker 1: myself to see how many times I went to Instagram

445
00:21:41,080 --> 00:21:43,440
Speaker 1: without even thinking, like in the middle of my day,

446
00:21:43,960 --> 00:21:46,520
Speaker 1: because I put it in an like its own folder

447
00:21:46,600 --> 00:21:49,159
Speaker 1: to prevent myself from so easily accessing it, because all

448
00:21:49,200 --> 00:21:51,480
Speaker 1: of a sudden, you're watching something and you're like, wait,

449
00:21:51,520 --> 00:21:53,919
Speaker 1: when did I get on Instagram? You know, three minutes ago.

450
00:21:53,960 --> 00:21:55,680
Speaker 1: I was supposed to be reading a book. What happened.

451
00:21:56,840 --> 00:21:59,399
Speaker 1: So it's just a matter of trying to kind of

452
00:21:59,480 --> 00:22:02,159
Speaker 1: limit your exposure to that because that's what it is.

453
00:22:03,240 --> 00:22:05,600
Speaker 1: And I definitely have and I'm back to writing and

454
00:22:05,640 --> 00:22:08,000
Speaker 1: I'm like getting out again and I have been for

455
00:22:08,000 --> 00:22:10,480
Speaker 1: the last year. But that's that's a weird part of

456
00:22:10,520 --> 00:22:15,840
Speaker 1: it too, is wait, you're you've remained COVID free, right, Yeah,

457
00:22:16,040 --> 00:22:18,480
Speaker 1: you're a gold star. I know, I know, I'm not

458
00:22:18,480 --> 00:22:21,200
Speaker 1: going that's well, I'm a medical director, so that's why

459
00:22:21,560 --> 00:22:24,919
Speaker 1: I love it. Well, I was back doing shows again,

460
00:22:25,240 --> 00:22:28,000
Speaker 1: and I was vaccinated, fully vaccinated, and then I got

461
00:22:28,080 --> 00:22:30,840
Speaker 1: to had a breakthrough case in August. It's like a

462
00:22:30,880 --> 00:22:32,600
Speaker 1: mixture of things. It's like all of a sudden, two

463
00:22:32,680 --> 00:22:35,040
Speaker 1: years went by in a blink. I wasn't writing as much.

464
00:22:35,040 --> 00:22:38,160
Speaker 1: My life changed so much by not touring. I'm still

465
00:22:38,160 --> 00:22:40,280
Speaker 1: writing for people and doing punch up and stuff a lot,

466
00:22:40,400 --> 00:22:42,960
Speaker 1: and writing a show and writing on shows. So like,

467
00:22:43,040 --> 00:22:45,200
Speaker 1: I am grateful to keep my mind going and joke

468
00:22:45,280 --> 00:22:48,359
Speaker 1: writing and being comedy. So it's not like I'm down

469
00:22:48,440 --> 00:22:50,679
Speaker 1: for the count or something. But I guess after you

470
00:22:50,720 --> 00:22:54,200
Speaker 1: do something for so long and you have that weird

471
00:22:54,240 --> 00:22:56,360
Speaker 1: relationship or break with it, I don't know if it's

472
00:22:56,440 --> 00:22:59,359
Speaker 1: COVID brain fog or what's going on, but like I

473
00:22:59,440 --> 00:23:02,680
Speaker 1: have trouble remembering things, like there's a lot adding to

474
00:23:03,160 --> 00:23:05,080
Speaker 1: all of it, and then the fear of getting back

475
00:23:05,080 --> 00:23:08,080
Speaker 1: out again after not doing it for so long. Oh yeah,

476
00:23:08,480 --> 00:23:10,480
Speaker 1: I think I have to shift my mindset a bit,

477
00:23:10,640 --> 00:23:13,520
Speaker 1: because I like listening to you when you say things

478
00:23:13,720 --> 00:23:16,919
Speaker 1: like how happy people. You're giving people this service, like

479
00:23:16,960 --> 00:23:19,800
Speaker 1: you're going to perform for them and give them jokes,

480
00:23:19,840 --> 00:23:22,879
Speaker 1: And oddly I have this other mindset that's like, oh no,

481
00:23:22,960 --> 00:23:24,399
Speaker 1: am I going to be good enough? It will be

482
00:23:24,400 --> 00:23:26,960
Speaker 1: worth their money. I don't want to waste their time,

483
00:23:27,400 --> 00:23:30,000
Speaker 1: you know, Like something's I need to sort of shift

484
00:23:30,040 --> 00:23:32,240
Speaker 1: before I go back out and remember, like, I know

485
00:23:32,359 --> 00:23:34,879
Speaker 1: this job is fun. I know it. I was happy

486
00:23:34,920 --> 00:23:36,760
Speaker 1: to be doing it. But something's happened to me over

487
00:23:36,800 --> 00:23:39,679
Speaker 1: the years where I've grown more introverted and I and

488
00:23:39,720 --> 00:23:41,960
Speaker 1: I think also it has to do with like vulnerability.

489
00:23:42,200 --> 00:23:45,200
Speaker 1: It's almost like I feel like I owe it and

490
00:23:45,440 --> 00:23:48,639
Speaker 1: it's a strange divulging thing that I have where I

491
00:23:48,680 --> 00:23:50,920
Speaker 1: feel like I have to tell you everything you know,

492
00:23:51,160 --> 00:23:53,639
Speaker 1: and I think that's taken a toll as well. My

493
00:23:53,680 --> 00:23:55,600
Speaker 1: mom always be like it's your strength and and and

494
00:23:55,680 --> 00:23:58,560
Speaker 1: also a weakness of yours. And I know you're also

495
00:23:58,760 --> 00:24:03,080
Speaker 1: like you're vulnerable. You've been most vulnerable in this last special.

496
00:24:03,560 --> 00:24:06,600
Speaker 1: So I don't know if you've shifted into wanting to

497
00:24:06,640 --> 00:24:10,440
Speaker 1: do that more or if you felt exhausted by it. Yeah,

498
00:24:10,560 --> 00:24:12,520
Speaker 1: I mean I I did, like I I when I

499
00:24:12,560 --> 00:24:14,440
Speaker 1: put that special out, I was like, Okay, now let's

500
00:24:14,440 --> 00:24:16,560
Speaker 1: get back to like stand up, stand up, Like I

501
00:24:16,560 --> 00:24:19,120
Speaker 1: had to say all of that for my my own

502
00:24:19,280 --> 00:24:22,080
Speaker 1: peace of mind and everything you just said. I can

503
00:24:22,119 --> 00:24:24,320
Speaker 1: totally relate to taking a break. I didn't do it

504
00:24:24,359 --> 00:24:27,000
Speaker 1: for six years. Getting back on stage. I had to

505
00:24:27,040 --> 00:24:29,480
Speaker 1: like go in the back door. You know. I went

506
00:24:29,520 --> 00:24:32,119
Speaker 1: on a book tour. I say that in quotes because

507
00:24:32,119 --> 00:24:36,600
Speaker 1: it was like my own psychic way of allowing myself

508
00:24:36,600 --> 00:24:38,959
Speaker 1: to be on stage but not alone, because I had

509
00:24:39,040 --> 00:24:42,239
Speaker 1: someone interviewing me. And then eventually, once I gathered all

510
00:24:42,280 --> 00:24:44,760
Speaker 1: the stories that I was telling on stage, I knew, okay,

511
00:24:44,800 --> 00:24:47,080
Speaker 1: this is a new hour of material. Now let me

512
00:24:47,119 --> 00:24:49,280
Speaker 1: kick the interviewer off the stage and I'll just go

513
00:24:49,400 --> 00:24:52,320
Speaker 1: up there. But it was very back door, like, you know,

514
00:24:52,560 --> 00:24:55,360
Speaker 1: getting back into stand up, which is something my agents,

515
00:24:55,400 --> 00:24:57,600
Speaker 1: my managers, everyone on my team had been telling me

516
00:24:57,680 --> 00:24:59,800
Speaker 1: that I have to do. You have to do stand up.

517
00:24:59,800 --> 00:25:01,679
Speaker 1: You can't take breaks from stand up, you know, And

518
00:25:01,680 --> 00:25:03,120
Speaker 1: I was like, fuck it, I don't need to listen

519
00:25:03,160 --> 00:25:05,520
Speaker 1: to anybody, and I'll do it on my own terms.

520
00:25:05,960 --> 00:25:08,800
Speaker 1: So I can definitely relate to what you're saying about

521
00:25:09,200 --> 00:25:11,880
Speaker 1: not thinking you were worthwhile, not thinking I was good enough,

522
00:25:11,960 --> 00:25:14,440
Speaker 1: not thinking people are gonna get it, or they're gonna

523
00:25:14,640 --> 00:25:17,360
Speaker 1: forgive me for taking such a long break, or they're

524
00:25:17,359 --> 00:25:20,160
Speaker 1: gonna say, oh, I'm too serious now, I'm not funny enough,

525
00:25:20,200 --> 00:25:22,400
Speaker 1: all of those things. And I think the only way

526
00:25:22,440 --> 00:25:25,879
Speaker 1: to combat that is by being on stage. Yeah, And

527
00:25:25,920 --> 00:25:28,760
Speaker 1: that's what I've basically come to now two years later,

528
00:25:29,520 --> 00:25:32,720
Speaker 1: is I'm getting back out locally for sure, and I've

529
00:25:32,760 --> 00:25:35,199
Speaker 1: started getting back on the road, and I'll in my

530
00:25:35,280 --> 00:25:37,600
Speaker 1: first club in the long time. Well, I did like

531
00:25:38,000 --> 00:25:41,080
Speaker 1: the Fort in Fort Collins in Colorado, like I keep

532
00:25:41,119 --> 00:25:44,160
Speaker 1: dipping my toe like once a month, and like places

533
00:25:44,200 --> 00:25:46,240
Speaker 1: where I feel good or run by people I feel

534
00:25:46,320 --> 00:25:48,800
Speaker 1: good about. And so then I'll be at Comedy Works

535
00:25:48,800 --> 00:25:51,919
Speaker 1: in Denver the fourth weekend of February. And you know

536
00:25:52,600 --> 00:25:55,879
Speaker 1: that club is just the best, the best, the best.

537
00:25:56,040 --> 00:25:59,679
Speaker 1: I love that that Zaney is in Nashville. Are I

538
00:25:59,720 --> 00:26:02,080
Speaker 1: agree with you? Those are favorites for sure. They're just

539
00:26:02,200 --> 00:26:04,520
Speaker 1: they feel good and I almost feel like I can

540
00:26:04,560 --> 00:26:08,359
Speaker 1: try anything. So I am thankful that that's my first

541
00:26:08,440 --> 00:26:10,880
Speaker 1: club back in a really long time. And then also

542
00:26:10,960 --> 00:26:13,640
Speaker 1: just I'll always get in my head about new material

543
00:26:13,800 --> 00:26:16,480
Speaker 1: where I'm like I has to be all new. And

544
00:26:16,960 --> 00:26:18,960
Speaker 1: years ago, after our half hours in neat Barghatty and

545
00:26:19,000 --> 00:26:20,240
Speaker 1: I were talking and he was saying, you know what

546
00:26:20,280 --> 00:26:23,280
Speaker 1: I'm doing on the road is I'm saying up top,

547
00:26:23,280 --> 00:26:24,679
Speaker 1: I'm gonna go as long as I can with my

548
00:26:24,720 --> 00:26:27,560
Speaker 1: new stuff and then I'll tell you when we got

549
00:26:27,560 --> 00:26:30,800
Speaker 1: to dip into the old, which I really liked because

550
00:26:30,800 --> 00:26:32,800
Speaker 1: it just is like I put a lot of pressure

551
00:26:32,840 --> 00:26:36,439
Speaker 1: on myself to always bring like new material. And then

552
00:26:36,480 --> 00:26:37,920
Speaker 1: going back to what you just said, like I gotta

553
00:26:37,920 --> 00:26:39,880
Speaker 1: get back to stand up. Part of me is like

554
00:26:40,400 --> 00:26:43,040
Speaker 1: can I write just like an hour on burritos or something,

555
00:26:43,200 --> 00:26:45,240
Speaker 1: you know, just like, let's I just want to do.

556
00:26:46,119 --> 00:26:49,840
Speaker 1: I got fun topics like find instead of trying to

557
00:26:49,840 --> 00:26:53,639
Speaker 1: dismantle the patriarchy. Well, I think also, yeah, you do

558
00:26:53,760 --> 00:26:55,960
Speaker 1: that at your last special, you know, you kind of

559
00:26:56,160 --> 00:26:58,760
Speaker 1: like I had to do a certain thing. And I

560
00:26:58,800 --> 00:27:01,200
Speaker 1: think the good reminder is that you're doing this because

561
00:27:01,320 --> 00:27:03,640
Speaker 1: stand up is supposed to be fun. It's not supposed

562
00:27:03,640 --> 00:27:06,280
Speaker 1: to be so grueling, right, It's supposed to be fun.

563
00:27:06,320 --> 00:27:08,399
Speaker 1: At least the time you're on stage should be fun.

564
00:27:08,840 --> 00:27:12,560
Speaker 1: So that's a good reminder. Anyway, you sound like you're

565
00:27:12,560 --> 00:27:15,040
Speaker 1: in a great space to give advice to our callers today,

566
00:27:15,160 --> 00:27:16,960
Speaker 1: So I mean the time it could not be better.

567
00:27:17,480 --> 00:27:21,159
Speaker 1: Readers Digest most uplifting comic of the year. Here. We

568
00:27:21,240 --> 00:27:23,879
Speaker 1: have callers that call in, we have people that write it,

569
00:27:24,000 --> 00:27:25,880
Speaker 1: we have people that zoom in and we just give

570
00:27:25,920 --> 00:27:29,360
Speaker 1: them our feedback, and people are really earnest and they

571
00:27:29,400 --> 00:27:31,920
Speaker 1: call in with serious stuff. So we're just going to

572
00:27:32,000 --> 00:27:34,600
Speaker 1: tell them what we think. And usually people call in

573
00:27:34,640 --> 00:27:36,280
Speaker 1: when they've already made a decision and they need a

574
00:27:36,320 --> 00:27:40,040
Speaker 1: nudge in that direction from like the braver, bigger sister

575
00:27:40,160 --> 00:27:42,280
Speaker 1: to be like, hey, go take a leap of faith. So,

576
00:27:42,640 --> 00:27:45,960
Speaker 1: but yeah, should we get started? Katherine, did you guys meet?

577
00:27:45,960 --> 00:27:48,120
Speaker 1: Did I even introduce you? I don't think we officially did.

578
00:27:48,160 --> 00:27:50,560
Speaker 1: I'm Catherine. I'm such a terrible host. I'm so sorry.

579
00:27:50,640 --> 00:27:54,800
Speaker 1: Catherine doing great. Catherine's great. I like your heir. Thanks,

580
00:27:55,119 --> 00:27:59,600
Speaker 1: I loved your specials. I watched them. Thank you. So

581
00:27:59,720 --> 00:28:07,399
Speaker 1: we'll a quick break and then we'll come back with questions. Okay,

582
00:28:07,400 --> 00:28:10,640
Speaker 1: and we're back. Today's guest is best selling, really hysterical

583
00:28:10,760 --> 00:28:15,200
Speaker 1: stand up comedian, and Catherine is our producer who is

584
00:28:15,240 --> 00:28:19,359
Speaker 1: here every episode, and we are ready to get into it. Yes,

585
00:28:19,680 --> 00:28:24,720
Speaker 1: our first question comes from DESI. Dear Chelsea, on one episode,

586
00:28:24,760 --> 00:28:27,359
Speaker 1: you mentioned going to dinner with Joe and his ex wife.

587
00:28:27,840 --> 00:28:30,040
Speaker 1: I've been in a lesbian relationship with my partner for

588
00:28:30,080 --> 00:28:33,080
Speaker 1: the past eight years. She's divorced and has children. With

589
00:28:33,119 --> 00:28:36,120
Speaker 1: her previous husband. Any tips on how you can initiate

590
00:28:36,160 --> 00:28:39,200
Speaker 1: a relationship with her ex husband without being crazy jealous.

591
00:28:39,560 --> 00:28:41,240
Speaker 1: I know for the sake of the kids it would

592
00:28:41,280 --> 00:28:43,040
Speaker 1: be a great thing, but I don't know how to

593
00:28:43,160 --> 00:28:46,080
Speaker 1: navigate the feelings I feel when he's around. The kids

594
00:28:46,080 --> 00:28:49,200
Speaker 1: have expressed wanting to do functions with everyone, but my

595
00:28:49,280 --> 00:28:52,680
Speaker 1: insecurities have stopped me from participating. Any tips would help.

596
00:28:52,960 --> 00:28:57,080
Speaker 1: Thanks and keep kicking, ask DESI, Oh, well, that's so easy,

597
00:28:57,120 --> 00:28:59,760
Speaker 1: Like don't you just want to be an addition, not

598
00:28:59,880 --> 00:29:02,400
Speaker 1: a subtraction, right? You want to be in addition to

599
00:29:02,480 --> 00:29:05,479
Speaker 1: people's lives and to the betterment of This is your partner,

600
00:29:05,600 --> 00:29:07,960
Speaker 1: this is these are her children. Obviously you care about

601
00:29:08,040 --> 00:29:11,640
Speaker 1: them and about being a positive influence and being a

602
00:29:11,760 --> 00:29:14,400
Speaker 1: role model, and those are all the reasons you need

603
00:29:14,520 --> 00:29:17,680
Speaker 1: to just reach out like there's nothing going on with them.

604
00:29:17,720 --> 00:29:20,560
Speaker 1: You've been with her for eight years. Your insecurities you

605
00:29:20,640 --> 00:29:22,840
Speaker 1: just have to put in a box and like visit

606
00:29:22,840 --> 00:29:24,440
Speaker 1: them when you come home at night if you still

607
00:29:24,520 --> 00:29:26,360
Speaker 1: want to go there, And my instinct is that you

608
00:29:26,400 --> 00:29:29,360
Speaker 1: probably won't want to go there after you extend yourself

609
00:29:29,400 --> 00:29:32,200
Speaker 1: like that with other people. You feel so good about

610
00:29:32,240 --> 00:29:35,720
Speaker 1: yourself and you feel so good about the situation. Yeah. Absolutely,

611
00:29:35,760 --> 00:29:38,800
Speaker 1: I would say fake it till you make it, because

612
00:29:39,040 --> 00:29:41,400
Speaker 1: you just need to get there, get yourself at the event,

613
00:29:41,800 --> 00:29:44,760
Speaker 1: be pleasant, especially if the husband is not a monster

614
00:29:44,840 --> 00:29:47,600
Speaker 1: and didn't do anything bad. You know, relationships come and go,

615
00:29:48,280 --> 00:29:52,080
Speaker 1: and uh, it's sort of important that you are a

616
00:29:52,120 --> 00:29:54,800
Speaker 1: positive force. Like Chelsea said, So, I think that you

617
00:29:55,000 --> 00:29:57,479
Speaker 1: once you actually get yourself there and our kind and

618
00:29:57,520 --> 00:30:00,440
Speaker 1: you're and you're doing going through the motions and actually

619
00:30:00,480 --> 00:30:03,080
Speaker 1: come for real and you'll see the benefits of of

620
00:30:03,120 --> 00:30:05,760
Speaker 1: a blended family. Yeah, and then you become a hero

621
00:30:05,920 --> 00:30:08,320
Speaker 1: because then everyone's like, oh, look at her. You know,

622
00:30:08,440 --> 00:30:10,920
Speaker 1: olive branch. Here, olive branch. It's not even an olive

623
00:30:10,960 --> 00:30:13,000
Speaker 1: branch because this person probably never did anything to you.

624
00:30:13,400 --> 00:30:17,240
Speaker 1: So it's just being decent. And then that act extends

625
00:30:17,400 --> 00:30:20,200
Speaker 1: and extends and extends, and you're just gonna be happier

626
00:30:20,240 --> 00:30:22,719
Speaker 1: for it, I promise you. I feel like maybe there

627
00:30:22,800 --> 00:30:24,800
Speaker 1: is a small like this. I have all kinds of

628
00:30:24,840 --> 00:30:28,120
Speaker 1: stuff like these relationships in my family with my sisters,

629
00:30:28,160 --> 00:30:30,480
Speaker 1: like what this person is going through, and I think

630
00:30:30,520 --> 00:30:32,400
Speaker 1: you have to remember that they're not with that person.

631
00:30:32,520 --> 00:30:34,880
Speaker 1: The X husband for a reason. So they've they've been

632
00:30:34,920 --> 00:30:37,440
Speaker 1: with you for eight years and that ended for a reason.

633
00:30:37,960 --> 00:30:40,560
Speaker 1: And just by being there showing up, it will only

634
00:30:40,600 --> 00:30:43,120
Speaker 1: solidify that that you are the right person for them

635
00:30:43,160 --> 00:30:45,840
Speaker 1: and the great partner. So yeah, and at the risk

636
00:30:45,880 --> 00:30:49,160
Speaker 1: of being another white lady recommending Untamed by Glennon Doyle,

637
00:30:49,320 --> 00:30:52,360
Speaker 1: read Untamed by Glennon Doyle, like she talks about all

638
00:30:52,440 --> 00:30:56,640
Speaker 1: this stuff like co parenting and dinners with her ex

639
00:30:56,720 --> 00:30:59,400
Speaker 1: and her wife and it's really lovely and makes it

640
00:30:59,440 --> 00:31:02,640
Speaker 1: not seems so gary. Also, yeah, it could potentially even

641
00:31:02,680 --> 00:31:06,400
Speaker 1: strengthen your relationship with your partner. And also another thing

642
00:31:06,440 --> 00:31:09,320
Speaker 1: to note is any time you're having any emotion related

643
00:31:09,360 --> 00:31:13,200
Speaker 1: to jealousy, which many emotions lead to, then it's important

644
00:31:13,200 --> 00:31:17,520
Speaker 1: to negate it, like to say, okay, that's not or invalidated.

645
00:31:17,600 --> 00:31:20,520
Speaker 1: I should say, to remind yourself that jealousy is not

646
00:31:20,640 --> 00:31:23,920
Speaker 1: a helpful or useful emotion and it will only hinder you.

647
00:31:24,360 --> 00:31:28,000
Speaker 1: So whenever you're having misgivings about something, or you're feeling

648
00:31:28,360 --> 00:31:33,720
Speaker 1: insecure or competitive or whatever however it presents, when you

649
00:31:33,760 --> 00:31:36,400
Speaker 1: reduce it down and find out that it's jealousy, Oh

650
00:31:36,440 --> 00:31:39,600
Speaker 1: I'm jealous of this, then you have to kind of

651
00:31:39,600 --> 00:31:41,920
Speaker 1: act out against that. That's the only way to kind

652
00:31:41,920 --> 00:31:47,080
Speaker 1: of extinguish jealousy from your life. Yeah. Well, our next

653
00:31:47,160 --> 00:31:52,240
Speaker 1: question comes from Bells. Dear Chelsea, two months into my marriage,

654
00:31:52,280 --> 00:31:55,400
Speaker 1: my husband found out that he's inheriting millions of dollars.

655
00:31:56,040 --> 00:32:02,200
Speaker 1: Excellent update. It's enough to obviously make a significant change

656
00:32:02,240 --> 00:32:04,880
Speaker 1: in our lives, but nothing crazy like we can quit

657
00:32:04,920 --> 00:32:08,200
Speaker 1: our jobs and retire in our thirties. I feel insanely

658
00:32:08,240 --> 00:32:10,920
Speaker 1: fortunate to have this new financial cushion in my life,

659
00:32:11,000 --> 00:32:13,720
Speaker 1: especially since I'm quitting my job and going back to school,

660
00:32:14,280 --> 00:32:17,360
Speaker 1: but I'm mostly feeling very lonely. He comes from some

661
00:32:17,480 --> 00:32:19,760
Speaker 1: wealth and I come from a family of five living

662
00:32:19,760 --> 00:32:22,720
Speaker 1: off forty dollars a year. I don't feel like I

663
00:32:22,760 --> 00:32:25,400
Speaker 1: can tell anyone except my closest friend, because I have

664
00:32:25,560 --> 00:32:28,600
Speaker 1: no idea how people would react. I have no idea

665
00:32:28,640 --> 00:32:31,320
Speaker 1: how to feel about it. I'm crazy thankful for the

666
00:32:31,320 --> 00:32:34,960
Speaker 1: opportunities that this springs, but lonely as fuck. I'm writing

667
00:32:35,000 --> 00:32:37,160
Speaker 1: to you to hopefully get some insight as to how

668
00:32:37,240 --> 00:32:39,800
Speaker 1: you handled coming to fame and the wealth that came

669
00:32:39,800 --> 00:32:44,480
Speaker 1: along with it. XO XO Bells. Hi bells h Elsea,

670
00:32:44,640 --> 00:32:47,760
Speaker 1: how's it going? Hi? I say hi to Beth today.

671
00:32:47,880 --> 00:32:53,479
Speaker 1: She's our guest. Hi bell n Hi. So okay, so

672
00:32:53,600 --> 00:32:59,760
Speaker 1: your your husband is coming into a significant amount of money. Yes, great,

673
00:33:00,320 --> 00:33:03,440
Speaker 1: this is good news. But you seem very very fearful

674
00:33:03,440 --> 00:33:07,400
Speaker 1: about this. Yeah, it's just kind of I've never known

675
00:33:07,480 --> 00:33:11,360
Speaker 1: what that's like. I grew up without money, so it's

676
00:33:11,400 --> 00:33:15,080
Speaker 1: kind of like growing up with financial trauma in a sense.

677
00:33:15,800 --> 00:33:18,720
Speaker 1: I mean, it's not my money, but it's our money,

678
00:33:18,760 --> 00:33:21,600
Speaker 1: I guess, and it's just a very odd place to be.

679
00:33:22,200 --> 00:33:25,479
Speaker 1: I can relate, even just like having made money on

680
00:33:25,520 --> 00:33:28,440
Speaker 1: my own my mom as a teacher and she raised

681
00:33:28,640 --> 00:33:31,040
Speaker 1: me and my two sisters, and even like when I

682
00:33:31,040 --> 00:33:33,800
Speaker 1: get a writing job and television and we find out

683
00:33:33,800 --> 00:33:36,600
Speaker 1: how much I make per week, we squeal. You know,

684
00:33:36,640 --> 00:33:39,080
Speaker 1: it's like and I've been doing it now for years.

685
00:33:39,080 --> 00:33:40,360
Speaker 1: So I think it's something that's really hard to get

686
00:33:40,440 --> 00:33:42,520
Speaker 1: used to, especially if you're when you're growing up, you

687
00:33:42,640 --> 00:33:45,520
Speaker 1: were used to whatever it was, fast food, or every

688
00:33:45,520 --> 00:33:47,600
Speaker 1: time you get to a register it's like, you know,

689
00:33:47,720 --> 00:33:50,400
Speaker 1: a shock each time, or having to return things you

690
00:33:50,440 --> 00:33:54,840
Speaker 1: know at the at the un till. So I think

691
00:33:55,560 --> 00:33:57,360
Speaker 1: the thing that resonated with me that you said is

692
00:33:57,400 --> 00:34:00,520
Speaker 1: the lonely part. Have you been able to talk about

693
00:34:00,560 --> 00:34:04,200
Speaker 1: it with your husband yet or shared some of those feelings. Yeah,

694
00:34:04,440 --> 00:34:06,640
Speaker 1: definitely a bit. It's we had no idea that it

695
00:34:06,720 --> 00:34:10,279
Speaker 1: was coming, and so it's definitely taken a lot of

696
00:34:10,320 --> 00:34:13,759
Speaker 1: time to adjust, and throughout that adjustment we've been able

697
00:34:13,800 --> 00:34:16,319
Speaker 1: to talk about it more. But I guess he's just

698
00:34:16,400 --> 00:34:18,920
Speaker 1: in a different Money to him is a little bit different.

699
00:34:19,000 --> 00:34:22,520
Speaker 1: He didn't have that fear growing up, so it's just

700
00:34:22,800 --> 00:34:25,759
Speaker 1: we're coming at a different level. I would say. I

701
00:34:25,800 --> 00:34:28,480
Speaker 1: would also, you know, urge you to like this has

702
00:34:28,600 --> 00:34:31,719
Speaker 1: all the makings of being something positive. You know, it

703
00:34:31,800 --> 00:34:34,760
Speaker 1: doesn't have to. I understand you don't come from money.

704
00:34:34,840 --> 00:34:36,759
Speaker 1: I didn't come from money either, but I mean I

705
00:34:36,800 --> 00:34:39,120
Speaker 1: was never starving or anything, but I didn't definitely didn't

706
00:34:39,120 --> 00:34:42,279
Speaker 1: have wealthy parents. But it's a gift. You know. You

707
00:34:42,320 --> 00:34:45,080
Speaker 1: have to look at it with positivity and like brightness

708
00:34:45,120 --> 00:34:48,239
Speaker 1: and excitement, like you're gonna be responsible, You're gonna rely

709
00:34:48,320 --> 00:34:51,040
Speaker 1: on yourself because you've had the life experience that you had,

710
00:34:51,160 --> 00:34:54,520
Speaker 1: which was struggling financially, and that's why you're a great

711
00:34:54,560 --> 00:34:56,560
Speaker 1: candidate for this to happen to you know what I mean,

712
00:34:56,560 --> 00:34:58,520
Speaker 1: because you're going to be responsible about it. You're not

713
00:34:58,520 --> 00:35:00,920
Speaker 1: going to blow all your money, you know. You make

714
00:35:00,960 --> 00:35:04,480
Speaker 1: these commitments to yourself to kind of instill the confidence

715
00:35:04,880 --> 00:35:07,680
Speaker 1: that you need to kind of handle this gift that's

716
00:35:07,719 --> 00:35:11,440
Speaker 1: coming into your life. Does that make sense? Absolutely? Yeah.

717
00:35:11,640 --> 00:35:14,319
Speaker 1: And it has been like such a gift. It's given

718
00:35:14,400 --> 00:35:18,200
Speaker 1: us the opportunity to pursue career paths that we didn't

719
00:35:18,239 --> 00:35:23,360
Speaker 1: have the opportunity to before. And that's just completely life

720
00:35:23,440 --> 00:35:26,160
Speaker 1: changing and something that I would have never expected to

721
00:35:26,239 --> 00:35:31,360
Speaker 1: be given. Yeah, yeah, that sounds awesome. Are you struggling

722
00:35:31,360 --> 00:35:34,520
Speaker 1: with feeling like it's yours as a couple? Not so much?

723
00:35:35,040 --> 00:35:37,600
Speaker 1: Not good? I think that's really good. Then that's a

724
00:35:37,600 --> 00:35:39,520
Speaker 1: really good sign because I think that that would be

725
00:35:39,560 --> 00:35:41,520
Speaker 1: my instinct to be like, oh gosh, well it's not mine,

726
00:35:41,520 --> 00:35:43,440
Speaker 1: I'm not entitled to it, and I didn't earn it,

727
00:35:43,560 --> 00:35:47,560
Speaker 1: and and those things, unfortunately, like Chelsea said, are those

728
00:35:47,560 --> 00:35:49,960
Speaker 1: are the negative thoughts? And I think that taking a

729
00:35:50,000 --> 00:35:52,359
Speaker 1: positive spin on this, like it is a gift, and

730
00:35:52,400 --> 00:35:54,960
Speaker 1: because you're used to being more careful with your money,

731
00:35:54,960 --> 00:35:57,000
Speaker 1: you will be responsible with it, you know, And you're

732
00:35:57,000 --> 00:35:58,759
Speaker 1: not going to do anything crazy. And the other thing

733
00:35:58,800 --> 00:36:01,240
Speaker 1: that comes to mind too is, of course it sounds

734
00:36:01,239 --> 00:36:03,240
Speaker 1: like you're gonna be investing in careers that you guys

735
00:36:03,360 --> 00:36:05,840
Speaker 1: are more attached to or connected to. And then the

736
00:36:05,840 --> 00:36:08,480
Speaker 1: other way would be to make sure you give a

737
00:36:08,520 --> 00:36:11,120
Speaker 1: little of it away and two things that you care

738
00:36:11,160 --> 00:36:13,600
Speaker 1: about and that might also help make it feel positive.

739
00:36:14,200 --> 00:36:17,360
Speaker 1: Definitely looking forward to that aspect of it. I have

740
00:36:17,520 --> 00:36:21,719
Speaker 1: a lot of giving nature to me and I'm just

741
00:36:21,760 --> 00:36:25,560
Speaker 1: like I I think the loneliness aspect of kind of

742
00:36:25,600 --> 00:36:30,320
Speaker 1: like seeing the people around me just in my daily

743
00:36:30,400 --> 00:36:35,520
Speaker 1: life struggle and it's like why why do I deserve

744
00:36:35,560 --> 00:36:39,480
Speaker 1: this over these other people? Like here, take this please?

745
00:36:39,920 --> 00:36:45,560
Speaker 1: But that's not necessarily responsible. I understand there's also a

746
00:36:45,600 --> 00:36:48,440
Speaker 1: weight to it. I've struggled with where it's it's like

747
00:36:48,560 --> 00:36:51,359
Speaker 1: it doesn't just mean nothing to me, you know, where

748
00:36:51,400 --> 00:36:53,759
Speaker 1: if I if I am generous right to me. I've

749
00:36:53,800 --> 00:36:57,319
Speaker 1: struggled with the line between getting taken advantage of and

750
00:36:57,400 --> 00:37:01,280
Speaker 1: being generous because I do want to share and and help,

751
00:37:01,719 --> 00:37:03,400
Speaker 1: But I think that that's something just to also be

752
00:37:03,440 --> 00:37:05,680
Speaker 1: wary of, is not I'm not saying be head on

753
00:37:05,719 --> 00:37:07,480
Speaker 1: a swivel people are going to take advantage of you.

754
00:37:07,800 --> 00:37:10,760
Speaker 1: But I think that is like an aspect of it. Chelsea,

755
00:37:10,840 --> 00:37:13,239
Speaker 1: what do you think about that? Yeah, I mean there's

756
00:37:13,239 --> 00:37:16,560
Speaker 1: a definitely responsibility, and I think everything you're saying is

757
00:37:16,640 --> 00:37:19,120
Speaker 1: right already. You're not talking about going and getting a ferrari,

758
00:37:19,320 --> 00:37:21,120
Speaker 1: you know what I mean. You're not talking about blowing

759
00:37:21,160 --> 00:37:24,000
Speaker 1: your money on bullshit. And of course there might be

760
00:37:24,000 --> 00:37:26,279
Speaker 1: a couple of things that you are extravagant that you

761
00:37:26,280 --> 00:37:28,560
Speaker 1: place into your life, but you're already having the dialogue

762
00:37:28,560 --> 00:37:31,719
Speaker 1: with yourself that's responsible. So I think you should let

763
00:37:31,719 --> 00:37:34,200
Speaker 1: go of some of this burden that you're placing on yourself.

764
00:37:34,239 --> 00:37:37,480
Speaker 1: It's unnecessary and you're giving yourself kind of stress where

765
00:37:37,520 --> 00:37:39,600
Speaker 1: there doesn't need to be. You know, you've had all

766
00:37:39,600 --> 00:37:41,880
Speaker 1: the right thoughts and you're and you're in the right place,

767
00:37:41,960 --> 00:37:44,239
Speaker 1: Like everything's lining up to be for you to be

768
00:37:44,320 --> 00:37:47,880
Speaker 1: successful and responsible with this and not be an asshole.

769
00:37:49,680 --> 00:37:54,760
Speaker 1: You can always press that button when you're getting your coffee,

770
00:37:55,200 --> 00:38:00,320
Speaker 1: absolutely always, yeah, yeah, and you know you can't control

771
00:38:00,360 --> 00:38:02,360
Speaker 1: who the You know, this isn't something that you is

772
00:38:02,400 --> 00:38:06,680
Speaker 1: actively pursued, So stop also playing that narrative around about

773
00:38:06,719 --> 00:38:08,920
Speaker 1: all your friends and why do you deserve this? And

774
00:38:09,040 --> 00:38:11,640
Speaker 1: we don't know why anybody deserves what anybody gets, but

775
00:38:11,760 --> 00:38:14,759
Speaker 1: just be responsible with what you do get. Yeah, And

776
00:38:14,840 --> 00:38:16,480
Speaker 1: that's the thing about money is that allows us to

777
00:38:16,520 --> 00:38:19,719
Speaker 1: have power in this society. And you can hit that

778
00:38:20,520 --> 00:38:23,920
Speaker 1: h you know, give a little extra at the holidays,

779
00:38:24,120 --> 00:38:26,440
Speaker 1: find some organizations that you really love to give to.

780
00:38:27,040 --> 00:38:30,160
Speaker 1: But even in our pre interview call, you had mentioned like, well,

781
00:38:30,160 --> 00:38:32,319
Speaker 1: I'm going back to school and I was gonna sign

782
00:38:32,360 --> 00:38:34,680
Speaker 1: up for scholarships, but how can I do that when

783
00:38:34,719 --> 00:38:36,920
Speaker 1: I have this gift? And you know, maybe the gift

784
00:38:37,040 --> 00:38:39,719
Speaker 1: is you pay for your own school and someone else

785
00:38:39,840 --> 00:38:42,600
Speaker 1: qualifies for that scholarship who really needed it. So you know,

786
00:38:42,880 --> 00:38:45,560
Speaker 1: you just never know who is going to need exactly

787
00:38:45,600 --> 00:38:48,520
Speaker 1: that in their life. A couple of books too, I

788
00:38:48,600 --> 00:38:51,280
Speaker 1: just happened to be reading. This one is called Uneasy

789
00:38:51,320 --> 00:38:56,160
Speaker 1: You're always reading books about finances because that's the fucking

790
00:38:56,239 --> 00:38:59,640
Speaker 1: last thing I'm reading. So it's a great Well, this

791
00:38:59,760 --> 00:39:02,360
Speaker 1: one I just thought was so fascinating. It's called Uneasy

792
00:39:02,440 --> 00:39:05,799
Speaker 1: Street and it's by Rachel Sherman, and it reads a

793
00:39:05,840 --> 00:39:08,839
Speaker 1: little bit like it was probably her doctoral dissertation at

794
00:39:08,880 --> 00:39:10,880
Speaker 1: some point, so it's a little dry in parts, but

795
00:39:11,360 --> 00:39:14,160
Speaker 1: it's a book about like not the point one percenters,

796
00:39:14,160 --> 00:39:16,640
Speaker 1: but like one percenters in New York City who are

797
00:39:16,680 --> 00:39:20,239
Speaker 1: like raising a family and doing a renovation and what

798
00:39:20,400 --> 00:39:23,960
Speaker 1: you talked about with this loneliness around money. She interviews

799
00:39:24,000 --> 00:39:26,320
Speaker 1: these people and most of them won't talk to anybody

800
00:39:26,360 --> 00:39:28,560
Speaker 1: about how much they make, and so it's sort of

801
00:39:28,600 --> 00:39:31,160
Speaker 1: like feels very secretive for them to be divulging this

802
00:39:31,360 --> 00:39:35,840
Speaker 1: to this writer. But the way they talk about the money.

803
00:39:36,160 --> 00:39:40,000
Speaker 1: She breaks down the different styles of how these people

804
00:39:40,000 --> 00:39:43,200
Speaker 1: feel about the money that they have, whether they inherited

805
00:39:43,239 --> 00:39:46,040
Speaker 1: it or have a high paying job or whatever it is.

806
00:39:46,080 --> 00:39:48,399
Speaker 1: And I think it would be really a really good

807
00:39:48,440 --> 00:39:50,080
Speaker 1: read for you to see that you're not alone and

808
00:39:50,080 --> 00:39:51,880
Speaker 1: there are a lot of different ways that people feel

809
00:39:51,880 --> 00:39:55,040
Speaker 1: about having quite a big sum of money. And then

810
00:39:55,120 --> 00:39:57,960
Speaker 1: another one is you are a badass at making money.

811
00:39:58,040 --> 00:40:00,560
Speaker 1: So obviously, at first blush that sounds like it's not

812
00:40:00,600 --> 00:40:02,960
Speaker 1: what you're trying to do. But what she does is

813
00:40:03,000 --> 00:40:05,840
Speaker 1: she helps you to reframe how you think about money

814
00:40:06,280 --> 00:40:08,600
Speaker 1: so that it doesn't just feel like this kind of

815
00:40:08,600 --> 00:40:11,440
Speaker 1: deadweight thing. It feels a little bit more like what

816
00:40:11,520 --> 00:40:13,920
Speaker 1: can I do? How does this give me agency in

817
00:40:13,960 --> 00:40:15,759
Speaker 1: the world to help others around me or to help

818
00:40:15,800 --> 00:40:18,959
Speaker 1: myself in a way that I can be a light

819
00:40:19,280 --> 00:40:23,520
Speaker 1: to those around me. Thank you. Well, there you go, Bells.

820
00:40:23,680 --> 00:40:25,920
Speaker 1: So keep us posted and let us know. Okay, give

821
00:40:26,000 --> 00:40:28,799
Speaker 1: us send us in an update and keep in touch

822
00:40:28,840 --> 00:40:31,439
Speaker 1: so we can see what happens and all the great

823
00:40:31,480 --> 00:40:34,319
Speaker 1: things you're able to accomplish. Cool. Thank you so much.

824
00:40:34,360 --> 00:40:37,640
Speaker 1: I appreciate it. Yeah, I love you. Good luck with school.

825
00:40:38,280 --> 00:40:42,799
Speaker 1: Thanks all right. Our next caller is Kelsey. She's in

826
00:40:42,800 --> 00:40:46,400
Speaker 1: her thirties. Dear Chelsea. Five years ago, I met a

827
00:40:46,400 --> 00:40:49,160
Speaker 1: guy through a mutual friend and we had an instant connection.

828
00:40:49,600 --> 00:40:52,120
Speaker 1: We dated for a few months, but ultimately I wanted

829
00:40:52,120 --> 00:40:54,160
Speaker 1: a commitment and he was not ready for that as

830
00:40:54,239 --> 00:40:58,160
Speaker 1: he had recently ended a long term relationship. It was heartbreaking,

831
00:40:58,200 --> 00:41:01,040
Speaker 1: but several months later I started dating my crush at work.

832
00:41:01,440 --> 00:41:05,200
Speaker 1: He was dreamy, tall, dark, handsome, well dressed, and mysterious.

833
00:41:05,520 --> 00:41:07,759
Speaker 1: He pursued me, but I could never actually tell if

834
00:41:07,760 --> 00:41:10,560
Speaker 1: he liked me. I was so nervous around him, I

835
00:41:10,600 --> 00:41:14,080
Speaker 1: felt myself constantly seeking his approval. Whenever I saw a

836
00:41:14,120 --> 00:41:16,680
Speaker 1: deeper connection, he was dismissive and made me feel like

837
00:41:16,680 --> 00:41:19,359
Speaker 1: I was asking for too much. I started acting out

838
00:41:19,360 --> 00:41:22,480
Speaker 1: in the relationship, yelling, slamming doors, doing things not in

839
00:41:22,480 --> 00:41:25,800
Speaker 1: my nature at all. Eventually I broke things off. Several

840
00:41:25,840 --> 00:41:28,600
Speaker 1: months after things ended with Guy Too, I bumped into

841
00:41:28,640 --> 00:41:31,600
Speaker 1: Guy one and we rekindled things. He's been an amazing

842
00:41:31,640 --> 00:41:34,160
Speaker 1: partner to me, and after years of failure in dating,

843
00:41:34,200 --> 00:41:36,600
Speaker 1: I feel so safe and seen in this relationship we

844
00:41:36,760 --> 00:41:39,799
Speaker 1: just moved in together. But Chelsea, I need your help.

845
00:41:40,160 --> 00:41:43,480
Speaker 1: I still think about Guy Too constantly. I think about

846
00:41:43,480 --> 00:41:45,759
Speaker 1: the what ifs and what our relationship could have been.

847
00:41:46,080 --> 00:41:49,240
Speaker 1: I'm so happy with my current boyfriend, and he is funnier, smarter,

848
00:41:49,360 --> 00:41:52,239
Speaker 1: and more emotionally intelligent than Guy Too ever was so

849
00:41:52,320 --> 00:41:54,040
Speaker 1: why am I still so hung up on this guy?

850
00:41:54,360 --> 00:41:56,080
Speaker 1: I've been in therapy and I've done a lot of

851
00:41:56,080 --> 00:41:59,400
Speaker 1: personal growth. You even inspired me to do ayahuasca. But

852
00:41:59,480 --> 00:42:02,840
Speaker 1: I can't take this obsession, Chelsea. I need a reality

853
00:42:02,920 --> 00:42:05,799
Speaker 1: slap and some tough love. How do I let this

854
00:42:05,840 --> 00:42:13,160
Speaker 1: guy go? Kelsey? Hi, Kelsey, Hi, Hi. This is Beth. Hi. Hello.

855
00:42:13,600 --> 00:42:15,960
Speaker 1: Beth is using her bedroom voice today, and by the way,

856
00:42:16,000 --> 00:42:20,640
Speaker 1: we're all we're all going by Kelsey from now on. Okay,

857
00:42:21,160 --> 00:42:23,320
Speaker 1: so we're in this together. You need to read the

858
00:42:23,320 --> 00:42:27,279
Speaker 1: book Attached, because it talks about exactly what the dynamic is.

859
00:42:27,760 --> 00:42:31,320
Speaker 1: You're rejected blah blah blah, but you're from an anxious

860
00:42:31,440 --> 00:42:35,600
Speaker 1: kind of attachment. He's from uh, an avoidant and anxious

861
00:42:35,640 --> 00:42:38,719
Speaker 1: and avoid it. They basically, I mean, they paint this

862
00:42:38,880 --> 00:42:42,279
Speaker 1: picture for you. It's perfect. You read about hundreds of

863
00:42:42,320 --> 00:42:45,359
Speaker 1: different relationships and just there are three dynamics that are

864
00:42:45,400 --> 00:42:47,839
Speaker 1: at play at all times, and when we are for

865
00:42:47,880 --> 00:42:50,480
Speaker 1: some reason, we are addicted to that dynamic. When you

866
00:42:50,560 --> 00:42:54,560
Speaker 1: are an anxious attachment, you're addicted to somebody who's avoided

867
00:42:55,120 --> 00:42:57,919
Speaker 1: and the goal is to find a secure person, which

868
00:42:57,960 --> 00:43:01,200
Speaker 1: it sounds like you've found. You've did together. You're happy,

869
00:43:01,280 --> 00:43:04,520
Speaker 1: you're free. It literally is just your ego knocking at

870
00:43:04,560 --> 00:43:07,360
Speaker 1: your door and you're beholden to it and you're allowing

871
00:43:07,360 --> 00:43:09,560
Speaker 1: yourself to be So you just need to read a

872
00:43:09,680 --> 00:43:12,960
Speaker 1: very like easy book to read and you will get it.

873
00:43:13,000 --> 00:43:15,400
Speaker 1: I promise you after you read that book. Did you

874
00:43:15,440 --> 00:43:18,600
Speaker 1: ever read that book, Katherine, No, I haven't. So it's

875
00:43:18,640 --> 00:43:21,720
Speaker 1: just so, I mean, it's like paints every relationship dynamic

876
00:43:21,760 --> 00:43:24,319
Speaker 1: you've ever been in. And then you're like, oh, you know,

877
00:43:24,480 --> 00:43:26,840
Speaker 1: it's the tale as old as time. We love to

878
00:43:26,920 --> 00:43:30,839
Speaker 1: be addicted to our last rejection. Yeah, it's basically just

879
00:43:30,880 --> 00:43:33,839
Speaker 1: like this taste like ship. Yeah, I will have some more.

880
00:43:33,960 --> 00:43:36,839
Speaker 1: Thank you so much. I don't know that I need

881
00:43:36,880 --> 00:43:39,880
Speaker 1: to read the book too, apparently I've written it down, Kelsey.

882
00:43:39,960 --> 00:43:42,680
Speaker 1: Do you bring up your ex the guy number two

883
00:43:42,680 --> 00:43:47,040
Speaker 1: to guy number one? Sorry? No, I don't talk about

884
00:43:47,120 --> 00:43:49,840
Speaker 1: my ex to my current boyfriend. I wouldn't want to

885
00:43:49,880 --> 00:43:52,120
Speaker 1: like burden him with that. But does he know anything

886
00:43:52,160 --> 00:43:55,480
Speaker 1: about him? We've talked about exes in like loose terms before,

887
00:43:55,520 --> 00:43:58,799
Speaker 1: but he certainly doesn't know that I still have an

888
00:43:58,840 --> 00:44:02,000
Speaker 1: attachment to him. Are you in touch with him at all?

889
00:44:02,440 --> 00:44:05,200
Speaker 1: So we do work together, so I do see him

890
00:44:05,239 --> 00:44:08,040
Speaker 1: at work unfortunately, Oh well that's a big part of it.

891
00:44:08,080 --> 00:44:12,200
Speaker 1: Then you're still seeing them, yeah? Is it every day

892
00:44:12,440 --> 00:44:14,799
Speaker 1: you're back in the office or is it zooming? Yeah?

893
00:44:14,880 --> 00:44:19,200
Speaker 1: Not every day okay, but still you're seeing them? Yeah,

894
00:44:19,280 --> 00:44:21,040
Speaker 1: And I think mostly I just want to get I

895
00:44:21,080 --> 00:44:24,640
Speaker 1: feel like really emotionally reactive when I see him, Like

896
00:44:24,640 --> 00:44:27,000
Speaker 1: like my heartbeats faster and like my stomach turns, and

897
00:44:27,000 --> 00:44:29,560
Speaker 1: I just want to let go of that emotional attachment

898
00:44:29,560 --> 00:44:33,800
Speaker 1: I still have. Yeah, that's a tough one, the physical

899
00:44:33,840 --> 00:44:36,800
Speaker 1: reaction and having to see them again, because that happens

900
00:44:36,800 --> 00:44:39,080
Speaker 1: for a lot of people, but they're never like they

901
00:44:39,160 --> 00:44:41,640
Speaker 1: might see them once, you know, in years, so still

902
00:44:41,680 --> 00:44:44,200
Speaker 1: having to work with that person. I can imagine why

903
00:44:44,239 --> 00:44:46,439
Speaker 1: that would why this is a little bit more ever

904
00:44:46,560 --> 00:44:49,920
Speaker 1: present or having trouble letting go. See. The issue for

905
00:44:49,960 --> 00:44:52,759
Speaker 1: me sometimes is social media. When you can tell what

906
00:44:52,800 --> 00:44:55,600
Speaker 1: they're up to now, whether they've moved on or they're

907
00:44:55,600 --> 00:44:58,880
Speaker 1: with someone new or like, it reveals too much. Unfortunately,

908
00:44:58,920 --> 00:45:01,799
Speaker 1: we know too much. Yeah, I had to even like

909
00:45:01,920 --> 00:45:06,360
Speaker 1: on friends on Venmo. My ex blocked me on everything,

910
00:45:06,440 --> 00:45:09,000
Speaker 1: including Venmo and Spotify. I mean I dunked them, but

911
00:45:09,120 --> 00:45:10,880
Speaker 1: I think they just didn't want to know what I

912
00:45:10,920 --> 00:45:13,279
Speaker 1: was up to at all. It's so funny to do

913
00:45:13,320 --> 00:45:18,360
Speaker 1: the Venmo block. It reveals a lot. It's surprisingly reveals

914
00:45:18,360 --> 00:45:20,680
Speaker 1: a lot. I know, like they paid this version for dinner,

915
00:45:20,719 --> 00:45:25,879
Speaker 1: this person for weed slash cake, and then who else

916
00:45:25,920 --> 00:45:29,000
Speaker 1: they're with. It is true, you're right, does Venmo allow

917
00:45:29,040 --> 00:45:32,200
Speaker 1: you to see their other transfers? Yes? You better put

918
00:45:32,239 --> 00:45:35,279
Speaker 1: yourself on private, Chelsea. I'm not on Venmo, Beth, you

919
00:45:35,320 --> 00:45:37,239
Speaker 1: sink I know how to pay something like I don't

920
00:45:37,239 --> 00:45:39,920
Speaker 1: even know what the funk that is. For a long time,

921
00:45:39,920 --> 00:45:42,439
Speaker 1: I thought Venmo was a record store. I was like, what,

922
00:45:42,960 --> 00:45:45,960
Speaker 1: there are those back? You know? I'm not. I can't

923
00:45:45,960 --> 00:45:49,840
Speaker 1: believe you could watch other people's transactions. That's right, Hannibal.

924
00:45:49,920 --> 00:45:52,759
Speaker 1: Sometimes we'll just comment. He just gets on Venmo and

925
00:45:52,800 --> 00:45:59,719
Speaker 1: says cool, like that is funny. Anyway, Kelsie, listened to me.

926
00:46:00,040 --> 00:46:02,520
Speaker 1: You are way better than this, and you are way

927
00:46:02,560 --> 00:46:05,120
Speaker 1: tougher than this. Okay, so you have to find that

928
00:46:05,239 --> 00:46:08,040
Speaker 1: inner part of yourself that is above this, and maybe

929
00:46:08,120 --> 00:46:10,680
Speaker 1: it needs to be extinguished with this guy. Maybe you

930
00:46:10,719 --> 00:46:13,480
Speaker 1: need to actually see him for longer periods of time

931
00:46:13,520 --> 00:46:15,120
Speaker 1: so he can do the very thing that will turn

932
00:46:15,200 --> 00:46:16,960
Speaker 1: your stomach and make you realize that you're with the

933
00:46:17,040 --> 00:46:20,480
Speaker 1: right person, not the wrong one. But it's all ego.

934
00:46:20,600 --> 00:46:23,439
Speaker 1: You're allowing your ego to control you, and that's never

935
00:46:23,480 --> 00:46:26,439
Speaker 1: going to be your winning game. Right, You're cooler than that.

936
00:46:26,560 --> 00:46:30,400
Speaker 1: You're gonna get past this. And yeah, allow yourself as

937
00:46:30,520 --> 00:46:33,359
Speaker 1: much exposure as you think you need with this guy,

938
00:46:33,400 --> 00:46:35,719
Speaker 1: because I guarantee you he will give you all the

939
00:46:35,760 --> 00:46:38,160
Speaker 1: tools you need to get past it. Yeah, I think

940
00:46:38,160 --> 00:46:39,840
Speaker 1: that's true. I think reading the book will help. I

941
00:46:39,840 --> 00:46:41,839
Speaker 1: do know about attachment theory, but I haven't actually read

942
00:46:41,880 --> 00:46:43,759
Speaker 1: that book, so I'm sure that will help a lot.

943
00:46:43,880 --> 00:46:46,480
Speaker 1: And yeah, I do think seeing him maybe for longer

944
00:46:46,480 --> 00:46:49,040
Speaker 1: periods of time, just to remind myself of why things

945
00:46:49,200 --> 00:46:51,640
Speaker 1: broke off in the in the first place. So yeah,

946
00:46:51,640 --> 00:46:54,600
Speaker 1: and remind yourself every day, like, remind yourself how grateful

947
00:46:54,600 --> 00:46:57,359
Speaker 1: you are to be in a healthy relationship where you're

948
00:46:57,800 --> 00:47:01,839
Speaker 1: seen and loved and appreciate it. Keep reminding yourself of that,

949
00:47:01,920 --> 00:47:04,919
Speaker 1: you know, because eventually that feeling will take over. Yes,

950
00:47:05,040 --> 00:47:08,279
Speaker 1: for sure, for sure, Thank you, Chelsea. Oh you're welcome, Kelsey.

951
00:47:08,360 --> 00:47:17,279
Speaker 1: It's actually Kelsey for you to have a good rest

952
00:47:17,280 --> 00:47:19,640
Speaker 1: of the day. Thank you. Is it really? Am I

953
00:47:19,680 --> 00:47:22,200
Speaker 1: really using a bedroom voice? Do you feel at the

954
00:47:22,239 --> 00:47:24,320
Speaker 1: beginnings when you say hello, it's like your phone It

955
00:47:24,400 --> 00:47:26,360
Speaker 1: must be your phone voice where you like think what

956
00:47:26,440 --> 00:47:28,000
Speaker 1: it is is if I have a mic close to

957
00:47:28,040 --> 00:47:30,120
Speaker 1: my mouth, I feel like I don't want to be harsh.

958
00:47:30,680 --> 00:47:32,799
Speaker 1: There it is again, that's your bedroom voice. Well it's

959
00:47:32,800 --> 00:47:35,240
Speaker 1: definitely not harsh, so I mean, go with it. It's good.

960
00:47:38,400 --> 00:47:42,200
Speaker 1: There is nothing worse than having old feelings for someone

961
00:47:42,239 --> 00:47:45,719
Speaker 1: that you're not with. It is the most It's like

962
00:47:45,840 --> 00:47:52,120
Speaker 1: almost dehumanizing. It makes you feel so small when someone

963
00:47:52,520 --> 00:47:56,279
Speaker 1: else controls you're feeling in that way, you know, the

964
00:47:56,320 --> 00:47:58,799
Speaker 1: way like butterflies. I mean not in the good way,

965
00:47:58,800 --> 00:48:01,880
Speaker 1: because butterflies can be right but true. But the what

966
00:48:02,000 --> 00:48:05,360
Speaker 1: she described is that physical feeling, like because I've dated comics,

967
00:48:05,400 --> 00:48:06,640
Speaker 1: so it's like you're gonna see him at the club

968
00:48:06,640 --> 00:48:08,879
Speaker 1: again or whatever, or you know somebody on the other

969
00:48:08,880 --> 00:48:12,360
Speaker 1: coast if you're over there, and it is that physical reaction,

970
00:48:12,400 --> 00:48:15,000
Speaker 1: a heartbeat or your stomach turning, and you don't know

971
00:48:15,040 --> 00:48:17,880
Speaker 1: how it's gonna go between you. You're just like, I

972
00:48:17,920 --> 00:48:20,160
Speaker 1: don't know what they're gonna say to me, and the

973
00:48:20,239 --> 00:48:23,880
Speaker 1: anxiousness of it. Yeah yeah, And they know you or

974
00:48:23,920 --> 00:48:26,160
Speaker 1: that who you were at that time. That's the other part,

975
00:48:26,280 --> 00:48:29,759
Speaker 1: the intimacy of knowing you in that certain way. I

976
00:48:29,760 --> 00:48:31,759
Speaker 1: feel like it's more reckless with comics because they have

977
00:48:31,760 --> 00:48:34,200
Speaker 1: a microphone in front of their mouth. I always like

978
00:48:34,280 --> 00:48:36,879
Speaker 1: to get the first time out of the way with

979
00:48:36,960 --> 00:48:42,279
Speaker 1: any awkward reinteraction with somebody or reintroduction or first time

980
00:48:42,320 --> 00:48:45,279
Speaker 1: after something happened. I feel like it's important to get

981
00:48:45,320 --> 00:48:47,239
Speaker 1: that out of the way so that you can move

982
00:48:47,280 --> 00:48:49,759
Speaker 1: on to the next stuff, because it's always that that

983
00:48:49,840 --> 00:48:52,000
Speaker 1: we put so much weight on and we think so

984
00:48:52,520 --> 00:48:56,040
Speaker 1: heavily about, and if we could just like fast forward

985
00:48:56,040 --> 00:48:58,759
Speaker 1: to it and just do it, like look forward to it,

986
00:48:58,880 --> 00:49:01,759
Speaker 1: you know, because once you do that, then that's that's

987
00:49:01,800 --> 00:49:03,399
Speaker 1: the last first time you're going to have to see

988
00:49:03,400 --> 00:49:08,000
Speaker 1: them again. Yeah, that's true. We'll take a quick break

989
00:49:08,080 --> 00:49:10,440
Speaker 1: for an ad and then we'll be right back with

990
00:49:10,600 --> 00:49:17,720
Speaker 1: Beth selling. Hi, guys, we're back. We're back with Bath

991
00:49:17,960 --> 00:49:21,759
Speaker 1: and Catherine and Beth. You've been such a delight. I

992
00:49:21,840 --> 00:49:23,799
Speaker 1: love speaking with you. I'm so glad that we could

993
00:49:23,840 --> 00:49:25,840
Speaker 1: arrange for you to be odd. I know, thank you

994
00:49:25,880 --> 00:49:27,839
Speaker 1: so much for having me. I love the pod, and

995
00:49:28,040 --> 00:49:30,279
Speaker 1: you know, I really I was gonna say I really

996
00:49:30,280 --> 00:49:33,879
Speaker 1: care about you, which then started to feel weird. Um,

997
00:49:35,200 --> 00:49:37,040
Speaker 1: but I am really happy to be here with you.

998
00:49:37,120 --> 00:49:39,160
Speaker 1: It was just nice to talk, especially because I know

999
00:49:39,239 --> 00:49:42,480
Speaker 1: you can understand, so I appreciate you even just sharing

1000
00:49:42,520 --> 00:49:44,640
Speaker 1: what you did about, you know, taking the break and

1001
00:49:45,280 --> 00:49:47,840
Speaker 1: I don't know coming back. I've thought about different ways

1002
00:49:47,880 --> 00:49:50,880
Speaker 1: to reinvigorate myself, and but yeah, I was struggling with

1003
00:49:50,880 --> 00:49:53,480
Speaker 1: what we were saying, which is you you're so prolific

1004
00:49:53,480 --> 00:49:56,840
Speaker 1: and you're writing in your books, I mean massively, and

1005
00:49:57,239 --> 00:49:58,480
Speaker 1: there has been part of me that's like, oh, I

1006
00:49:58,480 --> 00:50:01,600
Speaker 1: should write a book and all friend even Phoebe Robinson

1007
00:50:01,640 --> 00:50:03,839
Speaker 1: has an imprint and she's even mentioned to me like, hey,

1008
00:50:03,880 --> 00:50:06,520
Speaker 1: have you thought about And it's like, what's stopping me?

1009
00:50:06,800 --> 00:50:09,359
Speaker 1: Is it me? Am I being self sabotaged? You right now?

1010
00:50:09,360 --> 00:50:12,160
Speaker 1: Am I being a whiny baby after my special or

1011
00:50:12,239 --> 00:50:14,600
Speaker 1: is it? Really? It's not one way or the other.

1012
00:50:14,880 --> 00:50:18,759
Speaker 1: We just there's a pandemic going on, a lot of

1013
00:50:19,360 --> 00:50:21,880
Speaker 1: things going on in the world, and I just have

1014
00:50:22,040 --> 00:50:24,560
Speaker 1: to start over. And that's something that was delayed. And

1015
00:50:24,600 --> 00:50:28,800
Speaker 1: anytime you have to start over, it's difficult. So delaying

1016
00:50:28,840 --> 00:50:30,600
Speaker 1: it and not getting back on the road may have

1017
00:50:30,680 --> 00:50:33,880
Speaker 1: extended those feelings. There you go, that's exactly right. You

1018
00:50:33,920 --> 00:50:36,040
Speaker 1: just need a little fire under your ass and you're

1019
00:50:36,040 --> 00:50:39,879
Speaker 1: gonna have to unfortunately light it yourself, you know, Yeah, yeah,

1020
00:50:40,000 --> 00:50:43,000
Speaker 1: Denver will hope, I think it will. It will. All

1021
00:50:43,000 --> 00:50:44,920
Speaker 1: you do is take a couple of like steps in

1022
00:50:44,960 --> 00:50:47,440
Speaker 1: the right direction, and then you're often you're running and

1023
00:50:47,520 --> 00:50:50,640
Speaker 1: everything starts going towards what you're working for, you know,

1024
00:50:50,880 --> 00:50:53,120
Speaker 1: And it's totally normal to feel you're the way you're feeling.

1025
00:50:53,160 --> 00:50:54,480
Speaker 1: Do you know how many people who have said this,

1026
00:50:54,719 --> 00:50:57,000
Speaker 1: you know, who are like, I can't do anything, you

1027
00:50:57,000 --> 00:51:01,319
Speaker 1: feel desultory. It's just like it's so list Yeah, it's like,

1028
00:51:01,400 --> 00:51:06,279
Speaker 1: oh fuck, what's the point of anything? Yeah? But what

1029
00:51:06,320 --> 00:51:09,640
Speaker 1: if you know what you do is going to save somebody?

1030
00:51:09,680 --> 00:51:12,000
Speaker 1: What if what you right is going to save somebody?

1031
00:51:12,239 --> 00:51:14,960
Speaker 1: And it will most likely you know, you're going to

1032
00:51:15,040 --> 00:51:18,239
Speaker 1: have an impact on others. And if that's the motivation

1033
00:51:18,280 --> 00:51:21,759
Speaker 1: you need, then use that. Yeah I will. And just

1034
00:51:21,800 --> 00:51:23,319
Speaker 1: like we said, I remember, have a little more fun

1035
00:51:23,320 --> 00:51:25,439
Speaker 1: on the road, Like people are happy there to see you,

1036
00:51:26,000 --> 00:51:28,959
Speaker 1: and it's just there to have a good time because

1037
00:51:29,000 --> 00:51:30,719
Speaker 1: I am thankful for them every time they show up.

1038
00:51:30,760 --> 00:51:33,399
Speaker 1: It's just like that weird almost block I put up

1039
00:51:33,800 --> 00:51:36,600
Speaker 1: when you Sometimes it feels like that at the comedy store,

1040
00:51:36,800 --> 00:51:38,839
Speaker 1: like there's other you know, there's venues that you love

1041
00:51:38,880 --> 00:51:40,480
Speaker 1: that you feel comfortable and you can just get right

1042
00:51:40,520 --> 00:51:43,200
Speaker 1: into yourself. I feel very like much like that at

1043
00:51:43,280 --> 00:51:46,480
Speaker 1: Largo or but the store. Sometimes the dudes in the

1044
00:51:46,480 --> 00:51:48,760
Speaker 1: front I just get this vibe. It's like arms crossed,

1045
00:51:48,800 --> 00:51:51,439
Speaker 1: like we'll see if you can make me laugh. And

1046
00:51:51,960 --> 00:51:55,480
Speaker 1: that's the vibe that I'm almost projecting, which these people

1047
00:51:55,480 --> 00:51:58,719
Speaker 1: don't deserve. They paid to come see me. So I

1048
00:51:58,800 --> 00:52:00,840
Speaker 1: need to just sort of get a little more positive

1049
00:52:00,840 --> 00:52:03,440
Speaker 1: with that. Yeah, and maybe stay away from the comedy

1050
00:52:03,440 --> 00:52:04,839
Speaker 1: store for a while if it's going to bring out

1051
00:52:04,840 --> 00:52:06,719
Speaker 1: those feelings in you. You know, I find the common

1052
00:52:06,760 --> 00:52:08,359
Speaker 1: I would never go to the comedy store. Watch I'll

1053
00:52:08,360 --> 00:52:11,240
Speaker 1: be there next week. But I mean, you know, don't

1054
00:52:11,280 --> 00:52:13,120
Speaker 1: like go to places that don't make you feel good

1055
00:52:13,440 --> 00:52:15,200
Speaker 1: until you can go there and feel good no matter

1056
00:52:15,239 --> 00:52:19,680
Speaker 1: what happens. Absolutely I agree with that. I've avoided Buffalo

1057
00:52:19,760 --> 00:52:25,920
Speaker 1: for years. I can't say any of the cities I'm

1058
00:52:25,960 --> 00:52:27,960
Speaker 1: trying to avoid because I'm about to go. I'm about

1059
00:52:27,960 --> 00:52:30,120
Speaker 1: to go to every single one. It's gonna say, you're

1060
00:52:30,120 --> 00:52:33,759
Speaker 1: facing your fears. Yeah, well that before we let you go.

1061
00:52:34,040 --> 00:52:35,840
Speaker 1: Do you have a piece of advice you'd like to

1062
00:52:35,840 --> 00:52:38,279
Speaker 1: ask of challenge? Well, I've milked it slowly throughout. I

1063
00:52:38,360 --> 00:52:41,080
Speaker 1: knew what I was, I got what I needed. But

1064
00:52:42,120 --> 00:52:45,000
Speaker 1: I ask a question would be how many times is

1065
00:52:45,040 --> 00:52:47,120
Speaker 1: the regular amount of times to pee in the night.

1066
00:52:47,719 --> 00:52:49,719
Speaker 1: Oh god, you know what, I think. I go too

1067
00:52:49,719 --> 00:52:51,920
Speaker 1: many times. I go. I've been going to be like

1068
00:52:51,960 --> 00:52:55,239
Speaker 1: four times every single night, and I feel like that's

1069
00:52:55,239 --> 00:52:58,319
Speaker 1: a lot. I think something's wrong. Well, Joe doesn't pea

1070
00:52:58,360 --> 00:52:59,680
Speaker 1: at all in the middle of the night, so it's

1071
00:52:59,680 --> 00:53:03,319
Speaker 1: definitely a female thing, which we know. But it used

1072
00:53:03,360 --> 00:53:06,520
Speaker 1: to be two times and now it's four times. I'm

1073
00:53:06,600 --> 00:53:08,480
Speaker 1: up there as well. I'll go to the doctor and

1074
00:53:08,520 --> 00:53:11,360
Speaker 1: find out for the both of us. Actually, I'm a doctor,

1075
00:53:11,400 --> 00:53:14,759
Speaker 1: so I don't. I just I look into it and

1076
00:53:14,800 --> 00:53:17,279
Speaker 1: i'll announce it on next week. You know. I need

1077
00:53:17,320 --> 00:53:19,240
Speaker 1: to go back and watch your special in the beginning

1078
00:53:19,239 --> 00:53:20,839
Speaker 1: and take the notes on what I need to take.

1079
00:53:21,280 --> 00:53:23,399
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, and when they I'll send you. I'll send

1080
00:53:23,440 --> 00:53:27,080
Speaker 1: you a special subscription. I mean prescription EXCT. Actually no,

1081
00:53:27,160 --> 00:53:30,160
Speaker 1: I'll send you a subscription and then I'm prescription. They

1082
00:53:30,200 --> 00:53:34,960
Speaker 1: go well together, all right. Thank you, Beth. Yeah, thanks

1083
00:53:34,960 --> 00:53:37,080
Speaker 1: for having me. I can't wait to see your new stuff.

1084
00:53:37,880 --> 00:53:41,200
Speaker 1: You'll need to see you in first and your new stuff. Okay,

1085
00:53:41,280 --> 00:53:46,040
Speaker 1: bye bye bye, Thanks Beth. Yeah, well, Charlsa, do you

1086
00:53:46,080 --> 00:53:48,360
Speaker 1: want to tell us about you? Show dates coming up? Guys,

1087
00:53:48,400 --> 00:53:51,960
Speaker 1: I'm coming February three. I have two shows in Portland.

1088
00:53:52,120 --> 00:53:55,960
Speaker 1: The second show still has tickets, so please get them.

1089
00:53:56,080 --> 00:53:58,919
Speaker 1: And then I'm coming to Eugene on the five, and

1090
00:53:58,960 --> 00:54:03,040
Speaker 1: then I am going back to Whistler, and then I

1091
00:54:03,080 --> 00:54:07,440
Speaker 1: have more dates coming up all over Canada in March

1092
00:54:07,800 --> 00:54:10,440
Speaker 1: and April, and then I'm coming back to the States

1093
00:54:10,600 --> 00:54:13,640
Speaker 1: for the remainder of my Vaccinated and Horny tour. I'm

1094
00:54:13,640 --> 00:54:20,200
Speaker 1: coming to Louisville, Kentucky, Birmingham, Alabama, Montclair, New Jersey, Santa Rosa, California,

1095
00:54:20,320 --> 00:54:22,960
Speaker 1: all sorts of ship So get your tickets and I

1096
00:54:23,000 --> 00:54:26,920
Speaker 1: will see you on my stand up tour. Also for

1097
00:54:26,960 --> 00:54:30,200
Speaker 1: tickets to Vancouver and Calgary. I really apologize for all

1098
00:54:30,239 --> 00:54:32,719
Speaker 1: the changing of dates, but now the Grammys have been

1099
00:54:32,760 --> 00:54:35,480
Speaker 1: rescheduled for the day that I was going to reschedule

1100
00:54:35,520 --> 00:54:38,800
Speaker 1: my Vancouver dates. And I don't get nominated for Grammys

1101
00:54:38,880 --> 00:54:40,800
Speaker 1: very often people, so I have to go to those.

1102
00:54:41,200 --> 00:54:45,200
Speaker 1: So we are rescheduling again the Vancouver and Calgary dates.

1103
00:54:45,480 --> 00:54:47,719
Speaker 1: They are most likely to be rescheduled in August. But

1104
00:54:47,760 --> 00:54:50,000
Speaker 1: you can always check my website we will update, or

1105
00:54:50,040 --> 00:54:53,040
Speaker 1: Instagram or Twitter. We updated all the time and as

1106
00:54:53,080 --> 00:54:55,640
Speaker 1: soon as we have those dates locked in, you will

1107
00:54:55,719 --> 00:54:59,279
Speaker 1: hear about it, so my apologies and any tickets you

1108
00:54:59,320 --> 00:55:02,400
Speaker 1: have will be nerd for those new rescheduled dates. And

1109
00:55:02,440 --> 00:55:04,799
Speaker 1: if you'd like to get advice from Chelsea and one

1110
00:55:04,840 --> 00:55:08,839
Speaker 1: of her guests, please write into Dear Chelsea Project at

1111
00:55:08,880 --> 00:55:11,480
Speaker 1: gmail dot com