Speaker 1: All right, guys.
Speaker 2: So we were just on to teason a pod, So
Speaker 2: if you haven't listened to that yet, go run listen download.
Speaker 3: Yes are so Now we're going to do two Jersey Jays.
Speaker 3: I'm Jen Fessler, I'm Jackie Goldschneider, and we all know
Speaker 3: who our guest is. Now. Hello, Teddy Mellencamp.
Speaker 4: Hi, guys, I'm so happy to be here.
Speaker 3: We're so happy to have you.
Speaker 4: The Tables of Turn Now I am I.
Speaker 5: In the Oh.
Speaker 3: Yeah, you're gonna get yours. Yeah, I'm going to rip
Speaker 3: you in new I Now ours is not going to
Speaker 3: be quite as salacious.
Speaker 1: We love you, We love you.
Speaker 2: Tamra had to step out for a little bit, but
Speaker 2: she's going to be joining us a little bit later
Speaker 2: in the episode.
Speaker 1: Today we're talking about health, which I know.
Speaker 2: That you have so much to say and unfortunately so
Speaker 2: much experience with lately.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but we're also going to talk more specifically about health,
Speaker 3: women's health and women of a certain age. And you're
Speaker 3: both Jackie and Teddy younger than I am, but focused
Speaker 3: on of middle age women and what we go through. Yeah,
Speaker 3: And it's constantly like that, It is, it is. I've
Speaker 3: always been this reaging hypochondriac. So I've been picturing my
Speaker 3: demise since I was in my twenties, and I remember
Speaker 3: just getting so freaked out because if I had a headache,
Speaker 3: I had a brain tumor, and then my wish was
Speaker 3: I would pray, please God, let me just have kids first,
Speaker 3: Let me just get married first. Now it's like, what
Speaker 3: about the kids, Like I can't and I don't. We're
Speaker 3: not going to get too morbid. But you know, in
Speaker 3: terms of health issues, I think that it's so scary
Speaker 3: when you get to our age.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I mean, I would say the biggest and I've
Speaker 5: talked about this before, but I'm hoping that it'll reach
Speaker 5: additional people. If you are listening to this right now
Speaker 5: and you currently do not have life insurance and you
Speaker 5: have not done your last will and Testament and your
Speaker 5: trusts or whatever it is that you need to have
Speaker 5: in place, do it now, because it's something I had
Speaker 5: not done prior to all of my skin cancer diagnosis
Speaker 5: and now I cannot get life insurance.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Wow, I didn't know that.
Speaker 3: Yeah that was testing.
Speaker 1: Wow, that's terrible.
Speaker 5: Yeah, So before you have you know, like I never
Speaker 5: really thought about it, like I was like I don't know.
Speaker 5: I mean like me and Edwin know where the kids,
Speaker 5: like my sister, you know, like we've talked about that
Speaker 5: kind of stuff. But once it started getting more real,
Speaker 5: I was like, oh my gosh, I need to have
Speaker 5: like life insurance. And I went through the whole process.
Speaker 5: You have to go through multiple different channels to then
Speaker 5: get like an email you're rejected.
Speaker 3: I can't believe that.
Speaker 1: Wow, that's awful.
Speaker 3: Wait, Teddy, how old are you I am? I love that.
Speaker 5: I was about to answer thirty six because like for life,
Speaker 5: that's how old I am.
Speaker 4: I'm forty two years old. So forty two years old?
Speaker 1: And are you your cancer free? Now?
Speaker 5: I'm currently cancer free.
Speaker 3: I know.
Speaker 4: Such good news.
Speaker 5: It's one of those things that I do need to
Speaker 5: continue to get checked every three months. I think I was.
Speaker 5: I ended up having over fourteen. On December twenty sixth
Speaker 5: I had a huge surgery that's essentially my whole back
Speaker 5: where they they essentially cut out the entire hole of
Speaker 5: like my shoulder and then pulled my excess skin over
Speaker 5: my shoulder and now there's like kind of like a
Speaker 5: shark bite surgery. My shirts news did an incredible job,
Speaker 5: but all of that could have been avoided had I
Speaker 5: not like I'm an anxious OCD diagnosed. I'm not self diagnosing,
Speaker 5: but like I am, and mine is not surrounding like
Speaker 5: I don't.
Speaker 4: I'm not like where you said, Jen, that you.
Speaker 5: Like make up in your head, Yeah, those things like
Speaker 5: I'm one of those people that avoids going to the
Speaker 5: doctor because I want to pretend I'm always okay.
Speaker 2: Wow, okay. So I want to ask a little bit
Speaker 2: of an uncomfortable question. And like the first time that
Speaker 2: you went in and they told you that you had cancer,
Speaker 2: Like what hearing those words?
Speaker 3: What was that like for you?
Speaker 5: Well, the first time I went in, truthfully, I didn't
Speaker 5: think it was a big deal. I didn't really know
Speaker 5: anybody that had skin cancer. I didn't know anyone that
Speaker 5: in my mind that was just something you cut out
Speaker 5: and you get right.
Speaker 3: I would feel the next right. That's like, I do
Speaker 3: know plenty of people that have had skin cancer, and
Speaker 3: it's not you think of it like I get moved
Speaker 3: orgery or whatever and never think of Yah.
Speaker 5: So I had had these spots on my back for
Speaker 5: for a long time, ever since I was a child, essentially,
Speaker 5: and they would just change colors from like white to
Speaker 5: frecklely to red.
Speaker 4: People think skin cancer.
Speaker 5: You think it looks like a standard mole for me,
Speaker 5: And I never did my first one. I went to
Speaker 5: a dermatologist. I hadn't gotten to the oncologist point yet,
Speaker 5: and the dermatologist said, this spot looks a little funny.
Speaker 5: Do you want me to biopsy or just cut it out?
Speaker 5: It's small enough that I could just cut it out
Speaker 5: right now. I know you don't want to come back.
Speaker 5: And I was like, oh, cut it out. She's like,
Speaker 5: it might not look great. I'm like, don't care, cut
Speaker 5: it out, send the whole thing in. Let's you know whatever.
Speaker 5: And then that one, you know, turned into thirteen more so,
Speaker 5: it really the first one I didn't think was ever
Speaker 5: going to really turn into another one. And then it
Speaker 5: was the constant cycle for someone like me who likes
Speaker 5: to control everything, the constant cycle of the unknowns, and
Speaker 5: then going to that place of what if I don't
Speaker 5: make it, what if I do die? And then like
Speaker 5: the things in my head that I would really go through,
Speaker 5: like it was like I had real conversations with Edwin
Speaker 5: where I was like, honey, I want to talk about
Speaker 5: who you're going to marry when I die.
Speaker 3: And I she would like to pick her, I'd like
Speaker 3: to pick them to my children, Like I.
Speaker 5: Really want to go through this because I don't trust
Speaker 5: your picker, like you went through a lot before you
Speaker 5: got to me, and like I'm still not even the best.
Speaker 5: Let's really narrowed down, like my non negotiables for what
Speaker 5: I want. And I even told my best girlfriends the same.
Speaker 5: I'm like, guys, if I don't make it, please do
Speaker 5: not let edwin. I don't mind if the girl's prettier
Speaker 5: than me, but she needs to be funny, a good mom,
Speaker 5: be supportive, show up to my kids' sporting events, like
Speaker 5: she needs.
Speaker 4: To be with it.
Speaker 5: Yeah, and if she can't be with it, I'm not
Speaker 5: interested and she has to know. It sounds crazy, but
Speaker 5: like one of the jokes we got when I was
Speaker 5: on the show is people said what do you love
Speaker 5: most about Teddy and he said that she's organized, and
Speaker 5: everyone was like, oh, grow, but he is the most
Speaker 5: unorganized human in the world.
Speaker 4: So like, you need that yin and yang, I think
Speaker 4: in a relationship.
Speaker 2: So I've heard that that Kyle Richards was actually the
Speaker 2: one who spotted the first like street cooking, spot.
Speaker 1: That's that's insane.
Speaker 5: Tell us, Well, we were on a run and I thought,
Speaker 5: you know, I guess. I mean, this was after I'd
Speaker 5: already gotten fired, so she'd she'd seen the back of
Speaker 5: my You know, we've been working out together since I
Speaker 5: got hired on the show, and I would always wear
Speaker 5: just like a sports for our tank top or whatever.
Speaker 5: But my shoulders were always exposed, so people always saw it. Plus,
Speaker 5: you know, like all those dresses that we wear, you
Speaker 5: kind of always show it. I was always in the sun,
Speaker 5: and you know, it wasn't the world's best about putting
Speaker 5: sunscreen on. And something that I learned, just to go
Speaker 5: back on it for a second, is people constantly ask me,
Speaker 5: you know, what sunscreen should we use? What?
Speaker 4: And what my like board This is key board certified
Speaker 4: dermatologists told me was the best sunscreen that you can
Speaker 4: use is the one you.
Speaker 3: Will actually put on?
Speaker 5: Yeah, Because if I don't you feel if this, Yeah,
Speaker 5: if the sunscreen feels lucky on you, or you don't
Speaker 5: like it, or you don't enjoy putting it on, you're
Speaker 5: not going to reapply it and you're not going to
Speaker 5: you know, so find one that.
Speaker 4: You like to use.
Speaker 3: This use spray. It's just easier. Sometimes I use spray.
Speaker 5: I mean, I'm always using different things because you know,
Speaker 5: with that, I have like textural stuff, so I don't
Speaker 5: like the way it feels on my hands blah blah blah.
Speaker 5: But so either way, I was on a run with Kyle.
Speaker 5: I was in a sports raw and she was like, Teddy,
Speaker 5: that spot on your back.
Speaker 4: It doesn't look good.
Speaker 5: And I had gone years, probably like ten years before
Speaker 5: to a dermatologist to get it checked, and they said
Speaker 5: it looked like dermat dermatitis, like sometimes after you have
Speaker 5: kids you get dermatitis like whatever it was. And they
Speaker 5: gave me like a steroid cream and a shrunk and
Speaker 5: I just ignored.
Speaker 4: It since then.
Speaker 5: But yeah, so at that moment, she goes, I'm gonna
Speaker 5: call my dermatologist right now. So she called her, and
Speaker 5: on our run we ran.
Speaker 4: To the dermatologist's office. And that was the first time I.
Speaker 3: Went to wow, did you like have When if anybody
Speaker 3: ever says these like, I remember if I'm getting like
Speaker 3: my hair washed and like I've had my haird a
Speaker 3: kind of look kind of move my hair and look
Speaker 3: at and I'm like, what the fuck, Like, did you
Speaker 3: have that sinking feeling when she when Kyle sort of
Speaker 3: picked up on it.
Speaker 5: No, I mean, but it was those things that like
Speaker 5: my husband had told me probably a thousand times to
Speaker 5: go get checked. But it's like something about just in
Speaker 5: that moment, I was like, you know, I'm such a
Speaker 5: know at all, but like I was like, Okay, you're right,
Speaker 5: I should go. And then when that first spot came,
Speaker 5: and then the beauty of I think sharing vulnerability is
Speaker 5: normally in my life, I'm one of those people that
Speaker 5: don't tell people what I need. I'll more just like
Speaker 5: pull back and maybe go into like a state of
Speaker 5: like depression or anxiety or whatever it may be, because
Speaker 5: I don't ever want to get the feeling of being
Speaker 5: rejected or somebody telling me they can't do something, so
Speaker 5: I just don't ask for help. But with this entire journey,
Speaker 5: I really opened up to my family and my friends
Speaker 5: and essentially people on Instagram too, but and just shared
Speaker 5: what I was going through and it gave me so
Speaker 5: much peace because I didn't feel like I was carrying
Speaker 5: it alone.
Speaker 3: I love that. I love that What about your kids
Speaker 3: were you able to did they know any better to
Speaker 3: have this?
Speaker 5: You know, I've always been, not that this is a compare,
Speaker 5: but people are like, how could you be scared of
Speaker 5: a doctor, but you went and got a neck lift.
Speaker 5: I'm like, because that was I chose to two hundred percent,
Speaker 5: I'll im in trolassic surgery seven.
Speaker 3: Days a week. I told, well, yeah, well yeah, like yes,
Speaker 3: so I will.
Speaker 5: I had always you know, and I wasn't one of
Speaker 5: those moms that like didn't tell my kids that I
Speaker 5: got a necklift, Like I was like, I have, this
Speaker 5: has been something that's bothered me in my entire.
Speaker 4: Life, blah blah blah.
Speaker 5: So like they had known about surgeries prior because of that,
Speaker 5: and Slay was always kind of like my nurse, Like
Speaker 5: she would come in and be like, oh, is there
Speaker 5: a stitch?
Speaker 3: Can I get that?
Speaker 4: You know, like she'd clean everything.
Speaker 5: So I just kind of kept the open conversation here
Speaker 5: and made it more of like, guys, first and foremost,
Speaker 5: I want to tell you that if in these next
Speaker 5: couple of months, why we're figuring this all out, if
Speaker 5: I'm not in the best mood, it's not about you.
Speaker 5: It's not because I'm mad at you, it's not because
Speaker 5: you're doing something wrong. It's because I am struggling. It
Speaker 5: doesn't mean that I'm not going to get better, but
Speaker 5: I don't want you to take that on. But also,
Speaker 5: do you guys want me to tell you as everything happens?
Speaker 5: And they were like, yes, please tell us, like and
Speaker 5: they all have different responses, like Dove's always asking like
Speaker 5: can I have a band aid? Because I want to
Speaker 5: be like mommy, I want to have a boo bloo,
Speaker 5: you know, like and Cruise is more of like the
Speaker 5: cuddler the lever, and Slate is like the caregiver, you know,
Speaker 5: she really goes.
Speaker 4: Out of her way.
Speaker 5: And I think the only times that it was hard
Speaker 5: is like post surgery, Like once I would think that
Speaker 5: I was coming out of it and then I'd get
Speaker 5: another hit and then my emotions didn't know how to
Speaker 5: handle like that.
Speaker 1: So was this is this genetic?
Speaker 2: Or is this fri I know you said you had
Speaker 2: them since you were a child, but did they get
Speaker 2: worse with sun exposure or or was this bound to happen?
Speaker 5: Yeah, I mean I think they don't actually know. I mean,
Speaker 5: I like winning things. But when my oncologists told me
Speaker 5: that I have the most amount of melanomas they'd ever
Speaker 5: seen at our hospital, It wasn't.
Speaker 4: Something that I wanted to do, and I was like, Okay,
Speaker 4: we're going.
Speaker 3: To congratulate you on that. There'll be no prizes for that.
Speaker 5: Yeah, but no, I mean, I now, after the fact,
Speaker 5: I did learn that there's something called Castle Sciences that
Speaker 5: I wish I would have done at my first mole
Speaker 5: or my first skin cancer.
Speaker 4: But what they do is they take.
Speaker 5: Your biopsy and after they diagnose you know what stage
Speaker 5: you are, then you can send it to Castle Sciences
Speaker 5: and then it can tell you your chances of getting
Speaker 5: more and it's spreading because that would have been key
Speaker 5: information for me to have because then I could have
Speaker 5: I could have gone one way or the other. But
Speaker 5: at least then I would have known these are going
Speaker 5: to keep coming up. But yes, I had tons of
Speaker 5: sun exposure growing up.
Speaker 4: I put bayboil on. I did these things. Is that
Speaker 4: the cause of it? I have no idea. I also
Speaker 4: was in a tanning bed when I was younger, but
Speaker 4: something that was I mean.
Speaker 2: The wedding, forget it. So how's your shoulder now? Was
Speaker 2: that a painful recovery? I imagine stretching the skin like that.
Speaker 4: I mean, I'll give you guys a little. I'll give
Speaker 4: you a viewing. It's not this isn't for our only
Speaker 4: fans page.
Speaker 1: Guys.
Speaker 3: I remember seeing it at it's a lot teddy looks.
Speaker 3: So that does not look like it was easy. No,
Speaker 3: I'm sorry, but I love how you're still backless and
Speaker 3: you're still sometimes right without like you wear it with
Speaker 3: your ride.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I mean I don't. Definitely, like people are like,
Speaker 5: what do you want to would you want to go?
Speaker 5: And I'm like no, for me, like all the shitty
Speaker 5: things that I've done in my life, at least I can.
Speaker 4: Feel like I'm helping people in this regard that.
Speaker 5: Like people are saying, yeah, I went to go get
Speaker 5: check because it can be a bigger deal. We think
Speaker 5: in our head, you know, the two big things with
Speaker 5: skin cancer is one it's not a big deal, or
Speaker 5: two you caused this yourself.
Speaker 3: Yeah, And so I think there's that guilt that it's.
Speaker 5: Kind of and I remember feeling that same guilt when
Speaker 5: I couldn't get pregnant naturally the first time.
Speaker 3: That's same, like sh I'm wrong.
Speaker 4: People would say, well, maybe you're too stressed or maybe
Speaker 4: you're this, and then it became that guilt again, and
Speaker 4: I'm like, why am I punishing myself for something that's
Speaker 4: completely out of my control?
Speaker 3: At this point, I hate when people say, like I've
Speaker 3: been gone through, like we all have very stressful times
Speaker 3: and people say, you have to relax, You're gonna give
Speaker 3: yourself cancer. That's how I'm like, So now you think
Speaker 3: that helps me to relax. So now I think I'm stressed,
Speaker 3: that I'm stressed.
Speaker 1: But I don't think that's cancer. It doesn't come from stress.
Speaker 3: They say it they well, listen, people have to say
Speaker 3: of it. They say it all the time. Yeah, like
Speaker 3: or they'll I've had people say, you know, she whatever
Speaker 3: one of my friends. Some Yeah, I've had a couple
Speaker 3: of friends got cancer and they say, well, she was
Speaker 3: in like the hardest time in her life and she
Speaker 3: was so stressed. I personally like to believe that one
Speaker 3: does not affect the other, but a lot of people
Speaker 3: disagree with me.
Speaker 5: Wow, well, I mean, I can't even remember what franchise
Speaker 5: on of housewives, but somebody said, like, you like said
Speaker 5: it public.
Speaker 3: Yeah, because I remember that she.
Speaker 5: Got cancer something along those I remember that, I can't
Speaker 5: totally remember that it was. And the person ended up
Speaker 5: having to like release a statement saying like you know
Speaker 5: that I didn't mean it like that, And I think
Speaker 5: that's also we say things in just sometimes you know,
Speaker 5: I mean, we even saw it. I know you guys
Speaker 5: talk about this often, but like I even saw it.
Speaker 4: Who was it?
Speaker 5: Maybe it was Barbara streisand commented on the ozempic thing publicly.
Speaker 5: She didn't realize it, But like sometimes we say things
Speaker 5: and we don't realize what the magnitude their impact will
Speaker 5: mean from that, you know, I have a.
Speaker 3: Question, Teddy, after now that it's gone forever, we're gonna
Speaker 3: go with it's gone forever, how has it changed you?
Speaker 3: And guys, I'm gonna I think that like it wouldn't.
Speaker 3: It's not just skin cancer, right, I would think, and
Speaker 3: I haven't had cancer, but that it just changes you.
Speaker 3: Whatever it is, has it well?
Speaker 5: I would say one regardless of if it's skin cancer,
Speaker 5: whatever kind of cancer it may be, is you need
Speaker 5: to get all of your checks. It doesn't mean you
Speaker 5: just need to go to the dermatologists. You also need
Speaker 5: to go to the gaynocologist. You need to get your
Speaker 5: eyes checked. It can be glaucoma. You need to get
Speaker 5: like every your colonoscopy's like all of those things, just
Speaker 5: do it, book them, like do it once and just
Speaker 5: like book out two days and make that a priority.
Speaker 5: But how it has changed me is I've really shifted
Speaker 5: my focus on things that I really love to do.
Speaker 5: You know, A big part of my self worth has
Speaker 5: always been, you know, like, am I going to be approved?
Speaker 5: Like I was always like searching for that you know,
Speaker 5: outside approval, whether that started with my parents or whatever
Speaker 5: may happen. So I've always been a really hard worker,
Speaker 5: but I wasn't really thinking about what do I love doing?
Speaker 5: And now I really focus on it. I'm back to
Speaker 5: riding horses a lot. I invest my money like the
Speaker 5: like I'm tight with my money, but like with that
Speaker 5: kind of stuff, I'm like, this is something my daughter
Speaker 5: and I love doing, and I'm going to invest in
Speaker 5: that because this is about enjoying my life that I've created.
Speaker 1: I love that. Can we transition to mental health for
Speaker 1: a few minutes.
Speaker 3: Yeah, of course, did you? So?
Speaker 2: You said that you struggle with anxiety, which I do too,
Speaker 2: and I do too. We talked a lot together about
Speaker 2: mental health, but we don't talk about it on here yet.
Speaker 2: I'm curious if you feel like being on the show
Speaker 2: you were three years full time?
Speaker 1: Right? Yes? How was that for your mental health?
Speaker 5: The being on the show was fine, Like, it wasn't
Speaker 5: necessarily like being on the show. I had some of
Speaker 5: my you know, I just saw Renna and Kyle and
Speaker 5: Erica and it was like no time had passed and
Speaker 5: we laughed and we enjoyed it and like we can
Speaker 5: talk about the good times because just like anything in life,
Speaker 5: you kind of like block out the bad times and
Speaker 5: remember the good It's like going back to that ex
Speaker 5: boyfriend after you know you shouldn't like it's still like
Speaker 5: you're like you forget the parts that weren't great. I
Speaker 5: didn't love being pregnant and filming because I didn't feel
Speaker 5: as engaged.
Speaker 3: I guess, of course, like I've I was.
Speaker 4: Somebody that drank on the show.
Speaker 5: I mean, I'm a person that I don't I don't
Speaker 5: need to drink to live, but if I'm going to
Speaker 5: go out to a birthday party, I'm going to have
Speaker 5: a couple of drinks.
Speaker 4: Yeah, Like it loosens me up.
Speaker 5: So not being able to do that my last year
Speaker 5: and then having it be a really heavy season that
Speaker 5: was difficult.
Speaker 4: But I wouldn't say that was being on the show.
Speaker 2: Well, the only reason I ask is because it's actually
Speaker 2: been fine for both of us as far as I know.
Speaker 2: But I have seen people whose mental health was shaky
Speaker 2: completely spiral.
Speaker 3: Well, I mean also I think, yes, I think, well,
Speaker 3: I think the show has affected my mental health. If
Speaker 3: mental health means anxiety, I mean anxiety levels have definitely
Speaker 3: they've gotten higher. Doesn't mean I'm not you know, I'm
Speaker 3: okay to function and I'm still having fun. But anyway,
Speaker 3: I think also I'm interested in mental health when you
Speaker 3: were younger because I have had mental health issues since
Speaker 3: my twenties and they've certainly changed forms and I handle
Speaker 3: it way better now than I did when I was younger. Oh,
Speaker 3: here's camera, Hi, Tam.
Speaker 1: Hi Camra.
Speaker 2: We were talking about health, and we talked all about
Speaker 2: Teddy's skin cancer journey and we were just delving a
Speaker 2: little bit into mental health.
Speaker 3: But like, also how different it is because we're trying
Speaker 3: to We're try you know, you guys obviously you are
Speaker 3: producers of our show, so you know, we don't really
Speaker 3: do talk a lot about housewives, but we do talk
Speaker 3: a lot about women of a certain age. And you guys,
Speaker 3: your spread is Tam, how old. I mean I think
Speaker 3: you're younger than me.
Speaker 6: Maybe, Yeah, I think I'm older.
Speaker 3: I'm fifty six, I'm fifty five, same idea. Yeah, but
Speaker 3: what happens between, like, for instance, Jackie's age forty seven
Speaker 3: and fifty five and Teddy you're even younger. But as
Speaker 3: your me mental health, because mine has definitely changed. I
Speaker 3: handle my mental health issues way better now. But you know,
Speaker 3: as we're going through these different stages of our life,
Speaker 3: what is affecting you in terms of mental health?
Speaker 4: Well, I think people talk about mental health now.
Speaker 5: I when we were younger, it was something to be
Speaker 5: ashamed of, or that like that one crazy person over
Speaker 5: there had that, so you couldn't ever have that, you know,
Speaker 5: or it was these where now it's so spoken about.
Speaker 5: I think, even especially post COVID because all of our kids'
Speaker 5: mental health was starting to be affected from not being
Speaker 5: able to go to.
Speaker 4: School and all this, Like we are all more comfortable.
Speaker 5: Speaking about it now, So I think that really sheds
Speaker 5: so much more light on the discussion around mental health.
Speaker 4: But yeah, I mean, you you go on to CHAM but.
Speaker 6: I think for me, it's just getting older in experience
Speaker 6: and things I've gone through before. I had a really
Speaker 6: hard time just dealing with things, just dealing with anything.
Speaker 6: And now I've just learned that, you know, everything passes,
Speaker 6: Everything passes, So whatever I'm so stressed out over and
Speaker 6: I'm I'm just in my head. I'm like, okay, give
Speaker 6: it up to God, Like God take over. I'm going
Speaker 6: to be okay. I am always okay. It's going to
Speaker 6: be okay. And it's just a process of just talking
Speaker 6: yourself yourself through.
Speaker 2: My therapist always says to me, she's like Jackie, slowed
Speaker 2: down and let life unfold. And I always remind myself
Speaker 2: of that because I don't. I'm always anxious about what's
Speaker 2: coming next, if nothing's coming next, or how to make
Speaker 2: things happen, and like, I always have to remind myself
Speaker 2: to slow down a little.
Speaker 3: I mean I discovered prozac later in life, so that
Speaker 3: has certainly helped. Yeah, I was.
Speaker 5: Gonna say, Zoloft has really taken things to the better
Speaker 5: place for me.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean I remember I went that route.
Speaker 6: Yeah, I went that route when I was younger.
Speaker 3: I was younger, i'd gotten off of it, and yeah,
Speaker 3: I've been.
Speaker 6: On it in years, but I've had children that I've
Speaker 6: had to put on many too for me too, anxiety
Speaker 6: and stuff inciting.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean I'm a big fan. Not everyone agrees
Speaker 3: with that, but I'm a big fan of SSRIs, not
Speaker 3: necessarily like the ones what are they called, like the
Speaker 3: Xanax and the although at times when it's I've had
Speaker 3: bad anxiety, I use those two. But like SSRIs, I
Speaker 3: I always say to people that are hesitant, you're still you.
Speaker 3: You know, it doesn't change your personality. It doesn't change
Speaker 3: at least for me, it doesn't change my E.
Speaker 6: Well, I think it's different for everybody.
Speaker 5: I think.
Speaker 6: I don't think everybody can. Like I had one child
Speaker 6: that gained twenty pounds and was staring at the wall.
Speaker 3: So fair, It's like.
Speaker 6: Yeah, that one, maybe another one might have worked who
Speaker 6: We ended up leaning her off of it and just
Speaker 6: got her into working out, and she's gotten older.
Speaker 3: It's very better, right right, Well, talk to us a
Speaker 3: little bit tammer about health issues. I mean that's the
Speaker 3: topic today. It's kind of heavy.
Speaker 2: But you had your own melanomas, correct, Yeah, I had melanoma.
Speaker 6: I've had multiple skin cancers. I've had everyone you can
Speaker 6: think of. And then I was getting a miss during
Speaker 6: a filming and in Iceland, and this MASSU said you
Speaker 6: should check that little dot on your butt. I'm like, okay.
Speaker 6: And I was going to my normal dermatology appointments and
Speaker 6: she's as I was walking out the door is all done.
Speaker 6: I go, oh, you know what, can you look at this?
Speaker 6: And she goes, oh my god, why didn't you show
Speaker 6: me this before? And I go, I totally forgot. It
Speaker 6: had been months. She goes me, buy upstate, Buy upstate.
Speaker 6: It was stage one melanoma.
Speaker 3: Wow, it sucks. And we're talking to Teddy just about
Speaker 3: how that has affected you. I mean, I'm obviously I'm
Speaker 3: sure your heart sank when you heard that.
Speaker 6: Oh yeah, it's a scary, scary, scary feeling because I
Speaker 6: was so used to having things burn off of me,
Speaker 6: cut off of me because I'm just I'm irish, I'm
Speaker 6: white and freckly, and all the damage I did to
Speaker 6: my skin in my twenties and thirties. You know, the
Speaker 6: tanning beds. I used to work for a tanning salong
Speaker 6: salon out of high school, so I would bake in
Speaker 6: those tanning beds, right, And now the dermatologist is like,
Speaker 6: this is what I'm seeing. You know, women in their
Speaker 6: forties and fifties that did this in the eighties and
Speaker 6: nineties now have multiple skin cancers.
Speaker 3: Yeah. And ps, my twenty one year old kids soon
Speaker 3: to be twenty two is still doing it and we
Speaker 3: fight about it. It doesn't matter. I mean, she's she
Speaker 3: doesn't give a shit, you know, she's.
Speaker 6: It needs to be out lawed.
Speaker 3: I know I can't. I mean, either Tanny beds or
Speaker 3: just she just bakes in the sun. And she always
Speaker 3: I say to her the first day, at least put
Speaker 3: on sunscreen. No, she has a Listen, she burns and
Speaker 3: she peels. I'm like, Rachel, you're gonna regret this, dude.
Speaker 3: She's not good, not God forbid skin cancer. But even
Speaker 3: just you know, esthetically.
Speaker 6: Just premature aging and rankling and all that that comes
Speaker 6: from from the sun. Like my daughter will not even
Speaker 6: go in the sun while she actually has like a
Speaker 6: little allergic reaction to the sun, so if she goes
Speaker 6: in she breaks out in a rash.
Speaker 5: But also it's the products our kids are using, like
Speaker 5: the fact that we have like ten year olds that
Speaker 5: want like drunk elephant with anti aging blah blah blah,
Speaker 5: like they go you can't even go to a Sephora
Speaker 5: on Saturday with like every like pro's purchase for them.
Speaker 1: My daughter's obsessed to thirteen. Oh it's bad for them.
Speaker 4: Yeah, because think about it.
Speaker 5: If you're using products on your on your skin that
Speaker 5: you don't need yet, you're creating your body to get
Speaker 5: used to something. I'm not a doctor, but like I've
Speaker 5: gone down the talk rabbit hole, right, like you're creating
Speaker 5: TikTok you.
Speaker 4: Know you're Yeah, I'm a TikTok doctor.
Speaker 5: So like I I have to tell Slate, like, no,
Speaker 5: I'm going to look through the back and see, like,
Speaker 5: what are the things inside of here that like are
Speaker 5: absolutely unnecessary for an eleven year old?
Speaker 3: Right? Can you imagine drunk elephant at eleven?
Speaker 1: I mean, my daughter's got more products than I have thirteen.
Speaker 1: They're all over the place.
Speaker 3: The kids are like in my way at support. It's annoying.
Speaker 6: Way, what is drunk elephants?
Speaker 3: It's like camera. I mean I love it.
Speaker 4: I have it on today. At least you see this glow.
Speaker 6: Face, right, Yeah, Okay, I'm gonna google it.
Speaker 4: Yeah yeah, it's I need it too.
Speaker 6: Can I get on Amazon?
Speaker 5: Well? The packaging is really enticing to children, especially, and
Speaker 5: they all do their like get ready with me, and
Speaker 5: they're you know, that's.
Speaker 4: Also the thing for mental health.
Speaker 5: Social media, Like I had to download this app called
Speaker 5: q Q Studio where I can track how long my
Speaker 5: kids are on each thing. So like I'm like, what
Speaker 5: are you doing at not like your phone supposed to
Speaker 5: be outside of your room. Why can I see that
Speaker 5: you were on Amazon or you were playing Roadblocks or
Speaker 5: Fortnite or whatever at ten thirty after.
Speaker 4: We said good night?
Speaker 5: You know, like we have to be aware because our
Speaker 5: parents weren't. I mean, we're not gonna be able to
Speaker 5: micromanage everything. I mean, heck like.
Speaker 3: We' I mean, yes, a for effort, but no, you can't.
Speaker 3: Have you had other health issues?
Speaker 1: Yeah, te had you struggled with intestinal obstruction.
Speaker 6: Right, Yeah, I still struggle with intestinal issues. I've had
Speaker 6: intestinal issues my entire life. They I had go on
Speaker 6: medication for a while. I mean when I was with Simon,
Speaker 6: I don't think my stress helped it, but I had
Speaker 6: severe irritable bow syndrome, so I could barely pick the
Speaker 6: kids up from school. I knew where every bathroom was
Speaker 6: from here to the mall, which the mall is only
Speaker 6: two miles from my house.
Speaker 1: So that means you always have to go to the
Speaker 1: bathroom where you never go away. I can.
Speaker 6: I would drink even to this day, like, I mean,
Speaker 6: this is disgusting, but I I pooped like probably seven times.
Speaker 1: I'm so jealous.
Speaker 3: I'm actually no, you're not jealous. I'm jealous.
Speaker 2: I'm not jealous of an illness of you know, yeah, direction.
Speaker 1: I'm on lindsay.
Speaker 6: I had abdominal surgery ten or eleven years ago. I
Speaker 6: had a strangulated hernia. So I had a hernia. I
Speaker 6: hate al hernia. There was beach my ribcage. I didn't
Speaker 6: know it, and my intestines had grown through the my
Speaker 6: stomach wall and were dying.
Speaker 3: Oh my god.
Speaker 6: I would get this really really bad pain. And it
Speaker 6: was going on for quite a few months, and then
Speaker 6: my stomach bloat really big. And then one day and
Speaker 6: I was going to see a doctor and they couldn't
Speaker 6: figure it out. I was having MRIs done at the
Speaker 6: hospital everything, and then one day I was sitting at
Speaker 6: home and it started and I said, okay, here it
Speaker 6: goes here it goes like, get the toms out. I'm
Speaker 6: doing everything, and this time it was beyond I called
Speaker 6: Terry de brow. I go, Terry, it's happening. He goes,
Speaker 6: get to the hospital now, so I called. I had
Speaker 6: to call nine one one. The hospital is literally two
Speaker 6: miles from my house Mission hospital, and by the I
Speaker 6: had to have like three shots of morphine by the
Speaker 6: time I got there.
Speaker 3: Wow, and wow they had.
Speaker 6: They did emergency surgery. They cut open my stomach vertically
Speaker 6: and they had to like dissect my intestines off my stomach.
Speaker 3: Wall wow wow.
Speaker 6: But while they were doing that, they found that part
Speaker 6: of my intestines were torn, and they think that that's
Speaker 6: what was causing me all the stomach problems. So it
Speaker 6: was kind of a blessing. And then then I was
Speaker 6: I mean, it was horrible recovery. Horrible recovery.
Speaker 2: Now I think we have to rap soon. But how
Speaker 2: are you doing today? Like health wise me?
Speaker 6: I mine, I have to keep on top of it.
Speaker 6: My intestines. I always have to get scoping done. My
Speaker 6: grandmother died of intestinal problems, so I mean it's really scary.
Speaker 3: Like ladies and gentlemen, welcome to aging. Yeah, not easy
Speaker 3: and not easy.
Speaker 6: I just yeah, So I was when I was doing Traders,
Speaker 6: I got severely sick and they put me on a
Speaker 6: very strong antibiotic to get me through it. Will it
Speaker 6: cause intestinal inflammation in my intestines. So by the time
Speaker 6: I got home from Traders, I was in the hospital
Speaker 6: for three days down my Yeah, I'm so. I always
Speaker 6: joke with my mom, I've had more health issues in
Speaker 6: my mom house.
Speaker 3: No one would know that we're watching you on I mean,
Speaker 3: I know, I think you shared some stuff on Housewives,
Speaker 3: But how do you guys feel in terms of like,
Speaker 3: I at least and again, I'm a horrible hypochondriac, so
Speaker 3: at any on any given day, death is knocking. But
Speaker 3: some times the only two part you too, totally too
Speaker 3: really well, the only good part of that is that
Speaker 3: when I go, because I do, I'm at the doctor
Speaker 3: every other day, and when I find out that I
Speaker 3: am okay, I feel like I have different perspective, like,
Speaker 3: oh wait a second. You know, whatever happened yesterday on
Speaker 3: social media is not quite as important, right, And I
Speaker 3: don't know, I mean, it doesn't always last. But this
Speaker 3: kind of stuff, I don't think. There's certainly nothing good
Speaker 3: about cancer, you know, or having intestinal problems or any
Speaker 3: kind of illness, but sometimes it does give you perspective.
Speaker 3: I mean, here about that a little. I mean, Tom,
Speaker 3: I don't know if you felt like if you kind
Speaker 3: of feel like that.
Speaker 6: I'm so petrified of cancer. I had a premio vos
Speaker 6: kan recently. Well it's been a year. I'm going back
Speaker 6: for a recheck, and they found like four spots on me.
Speaker 6: Two of them were one is a pre cancer a
Speaker 6: spot on my pancreas. Oh, come on, that's something you
Speaker 6: just don't want tok around with. And it's it's very
Speaker 6: very small. So I'm going back to get rechecked. And
Speaker 6: stupid me, I haven't even in a year, haven't been
Speaker 6: to the doctor to.
Speaker 3: Even Yeah, Tim, that's that is stupid. I can't take
Speaker 3: that away from you. That is just stupid. Total yep yep,
Speaker 3: teddy make But.
Speaker 6: They told they told me it was very very small.
Speaker 6: It was like point four million meters.
Speaker 4: But that's why I said, have you gone for your
Speaker 4: follow up?
Speaker 6: I'm going, yeah, next week, I'm going for a follow up.
Speaker 4: But yeah, I mean I think there's that.
Speaker 5: And I think also as women, we have so many
Speaker 5: hormonal issues that come and go, and like for me example,
Speaker 5: I remember being like put on birth control when I
Speaker 5: was like fifteen years you know, like it was like
Speaker 5: something you did. You like went to your first appointment,
Speaker 5: you got put on birth control, and then like I
Speaker 5: stayed on that forever and it wasn't probably the right
Speaker 5: one for me, or my body changed or like still
Speaker 5: the same things. It's just more when it comes to
Speaker 5: your health, no matter what it is, hormones, cancer, intestinal issue,
Speaker 5: you have to be an advocate for your own health
Speaker 5: because you bought.
Speaker 6: Like I can diagnose you Teddy right now, what you
Speaker 6: are a bundle of nerves and stress constantly. I am too,
Speaker 6: not as bad as you. You have high anxiety. When
Speaker 6: you have all that, it hurts you.
Speaker 3: We were talking about that earlier.
Speaker 1: We are just just thinking about that.
Speaker 5: But when people say that to you, it hurts you too, because.
Speaker 3: What am I going to do?
Speaker 6: But what did I tell you have to get your
Speaker 6: cancer diagnosed? I said, you have to find a way
Speaker 6: of processing shit. And then you know you now you
Speaker 6: are really into horses again, So I think that that's
Speaker 6: a good outlet. You don't you don't have time. I
Speaker 6: know for me because I'm a worrier that if I'm
Speaker 6: not busy, my mind is very destructive.
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, so.
Speaker 4: Please sense he kills my joy, Yes for sure.
Speaker 6: Yeah, and I know and you worry way more than
Speaker 6: I do.
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, I think there's like a moral to the story.
Speaker 3: One of them today is that like, as scary as
Speaker 3: it is, especially I think as you're getting older, go
Speaker 3: to the frickin' doctor. Like like Teddy, you were saying
Speaker 3: that too, right, like get and I don't enjoy it.
Speaker 3: There's there's a day with a mammogram is like not
Speaker 3: a good day, and but you know, I do it.
Speaker 3: It's my friend. I had one of my best friends, Denise,
Speaker 3: died of ovarian cancer, and she would say to us
Speaker 3: all the time, like because she went for a year,
Speaker 3: she didn't feel well and it didn't get diagnosed, and
Speaker 3: they would say to her at one point they thought
Speaker 3: she should go on antidepressants and she was just so
Speaker 3: tired all the time. But she would let it go.
Speaker 3: But she said, like towards the end, especially, but she
Speaker 3: would tell us the people that she loved, you got
Speaker 3: to listen to your body.
Speaker 2: And Teddy, I love your idea of just taking two
Speaker 2: days and making all your appointments and just dedicating those
Speaker 2: two days to it.
Speaker 1: I love that.
Speaker 5: I mean I think that that And then also knowing,
Speaker 5: like for me, because I am such like a stressed person,
Speaker 5: like I will go, go, go, go go, But then
Speaker 5: I finally gotten too the place of my life where
Speaker 5: I also will give myself permission to crash, and like
Speaker 5: It'll be a random like Monday or something, and I'll
Speaker 5: be like, you know, I just always think that. Like
Speaker 5: I'll even have to say to Edwin, even though he
Speaker 5: wouldn't judge me, I have to be like, listen, I've
Speaker 5: been working NonStop and then I had the weekend horse
Speaker 5: show with the kids and blah blah, and I just
Speaker 5: I'm gonna sit here and watch like women who kill
Speaker 5: on blah blah blah and zone out.
Speaker 4: And he's like, you do you bo?
Speaker 5: You know, like, but sometimes you need that to just decpress.
Speaker 4: I mean, some people murder doesn't relax them, but it
Speaker 4: relaxes me.
Speaker 3: Well, you also have little kids. It's harder to take
Speaker 3: that time. I mean, I take that time every day
Speaker 3: I crash, you know, but little kids, it's like you're
Speaker 3: kind of screwed.
Speaker 1: Yeah, well, I love this conversation.
Speaker 2: I think it was really like in lightning and I'm
Speaker 2: sorry for all you guys have gone through.
Speaker 1: But it looks like you come out the other side stronger.
Speaker 3: I have to say that, like, like the idea of
Speaker 3: people getting to know this, I don't know how much.
Speaker 3: I mean, I've watched, I've been a fan for years
Speaker 3: and years, but like how much people get to see
Speaker 3: you as people not just housewives? Know and like the
Speaker 3: struggles real.
Speaker 6: That's a good thing about our podcast that people do
Speaker 6: see us in a different light.
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, just.
Speaker 6: Screaming, not just screaming lunatics on reality show.
Speaker 1: This to you guys for coming on. We love being
Speaker 1: a part of your team too.
Speaker 3: Yeah, we do.
Speaker 5: We appreciate it really proud of you, guys, and we're
Speaker 5: excited to see where the rest of the season goes.
Speaker 3: Yeah, you guys look thrilled. Oh my god.
Speaker 1: All right, Well, thank you guys for listening.
Speaker 3: We are two Jersey Jays. Thank you, Tammer and Teddy.
Speaker 3: What a pleasure, what an honor. Bye guys, Bye guys.
Speaker 6: Thank you guys.