1 00:00:04,720 --> 00:00:17,079 Speaker 1: Hey, hey, Hey, we're back. We're black, We're brown, and 2 00:00:17,160 --> 00:00:26,800 Speaker 1: ambition ambition, ambition, ambition, ambition, brown, ambition, ambition, ambition, ambition. 3 00:00:26,840 --> 00:00:29,680 Speaker 1: I'm felling spices today. I still got some curls left over. 4 00:00:30,920 --> 00:00:33,840 Speaker 1: Some of y'all may have sinked me on the interwebs. 5 00:00:33,840 --> 00:00:37,919 Speaker 1: I told you that I took out my pipe cleaners 6 00:00:38,479 --> 00:00:40,400 Speaker 1: and the curls is popping and they still you know, 7 00:00:40,479 --> 00:00:43,360 Speaker 1: it's not it's not popping popping like Mandy popping, but 8 00:00:43,400 --> 00:00:46,680 Speaker 1: it's still a lot of little life left in them. 9 00:00:46,680 --> 00:00:52,560 Speaker 1: Maybe it's not here today, but she should be back soon. Yeah, 10 00:00:52,600 --> 00:00:55,280 Speaker 1: I mean, I don't know man who shared on social 11 00:00:55,360 --> 00:00:57,520 Speaker 1: that her father was in the hospital that's why she's 12 00:00:57,520 --> 00:01:00,280 Speaker 1: been away, so I feel comfortable sharing that. But he 13 00:01:00,360 --> 00:01:02,720 Speaker 1: seems to be on the men. So she should be 14 00:01:02,760 --> 00:01:05,040 Speaker 1: back soon. So we're gonna send our prayers to her 15 00:01:05,120 --> 00:01:10,160 Speaker 1: and the fam. So you just have me Ja. I 16 00:01:10,240 --> 00:01:11,800 Speaker 1: was just gonna give you a little update. And then 17 00:01:12,240 --> 00:01:14,000 Speaker 1: I had a word on today that I think would 18 00:01:14,000 --> 00:01:18,880 Speaker 1: be really helpful for your pocket book. So little update. 19 00:01:19,000 --> 00:01:21,400 Speaker 1: Last week I told you that I tell you I 20 00:01:21,440 --> 00:01:24,600 Speaker 1: was doing Meta. So Meta had International Women's Day, which 21 00:01:24,640 --> 00:01:27,080 Speaker 1: I think officially the day is the eighth. But they 22 00:01:27,120 --> 00:01:30,760 Speaker 1: had a breakfast and they invited your girirl to come 23 00:01:30,880 --> 00:01:35,720 Speaker 1: and speak, which was really awesome, and it just went 24 00:01:35,760 --> 00:01:38,119 Speaker 1: really well. It was I mean, I'm trying to think 25 00:01:38,200 --> 00:01:41,080 Speaker 1: like it was all these vps at Meta, all these 26 00:01:41,120 --> 00:01:43,600 Speaker 1: like you know, think about some of the most powerful 27 00:01:43,640 --> 00:01:48,040 Speaker 1: one hundred and fifty most powerful women like the in 28 00:01:48,080 --> 00:01:53,280 Speaker 1: the world, like coming together for breakfast, and it just 29 00:01:53,480 --> 00:01:56,200 Speaker 1: was just a beautiful event. I ended up sitting next 30 00:01:56,200 --> 00:01:58,440 Speaker 1: to Garcel Bouvier. I think that's how you say her 31 00:01:58,520 --> 00:02:01,520 Speaker 1: last name. Remember Garcia. I'll fancy Some of y'all too 32 00:02:01,560 --> 00:02:04,200 Speaker 1: young to remember the Jamie foxhell. Back in the day, 33 00:02:04,680 --> 00:02:08,600 Speaker 1: Garsett was on this show called Jamie Fox and her 34 00:02:08,680 --> 00:02:12,440 Speaker 1: name was Fancy. But you know now she's on Real Housewives, 35 00:02:13,080 --> 00:02:15,600 Speaker 1: I think of Beverly Hills, and she's done a bunch 36 00:02:15,639 --> 00:02:20,840 Speaker 1: of other stuff, produces acts, philanthropists, business owner, just the 37 00:02:20,919 --> 00:02:24,760 Speaker 1: all around wonder woman. And about three years ago, when 38 00:02:24,800 --> 00:02:28,600 Speaker 1: my book Get Care of Money came out, I had 39 00:02:28,639 --> 00:02:30,600 Speaker 1: sent it to the Ladies on the Reel, which she 40 00:02:30,720 --> 00:02:34,720 Speaker 1: was a host on the reel at the time, and 41 00:02:35,400 --> 00:02:36,760 Speaker 1: I was also on the reel. I used to be 42 00:02:36,800 --> 00:02:38,160 Speaker 1: on the reel all the time when it was you 43 00:02:38,160 --> 00:02:45,360 Speaker 1: know here before it got canceled, and she posted my 44 00:02:45,520 --> 00:02:47,960 Speaker 1: book on Twitter and I was like, oh my gosh, 45 00:02:48,040 --> 00:02:51,760 Speaker 1: garzaps my book. Am So when I ended up sitting 46 00:02:51,760 --> 00:02:54,079 Speaker 1: next to her at this event because she was also 47 00:02:54,200 --> 00:02:56,920 Speaker 1: speaking too, I didn't think she remember me, because girl, 48 00:02:57,360 --> 00:02:59,960 Speaker 1: you know, people be seeing you know, I didn't meet her. 49 00:03:00,560 --> 00:03:02,239 Speaker 1: I mean we were like, you know, at that time, 50 00:03:02,280 --> 00:03:05,000 Speaker 1: it was pandemic, so we were zoom, you know, the 51 00:03:05,080 --> 00:03:06,919 Speaker 1: reels like for other women. Jo. I just didn't think 52 00:03:06,960 --> 00:03:09,120 Speaker 1: she remembered me. So when I sat next to her, 53 00:03:09,240 --> 00:03:11,320 Speaker 1: you know, she smiled said hello, and I said hi. 54 00:03:11,600 --> 00:03:13,880 Speaker 1: I said, you probably don't remember me, but a few 55 00:03:13,919 --> 00:03:15,560 Speaker 1: years ago you shared my book on Twitter, and I 56 00:03:15,600 --> 00:03:17,440 Speaker 1: just want to thank you in person. She looked at 57 00:03:17,480 --> 00:03:21,640 Speaker 1: me and she said, Tiffany stop. I was like, not 58 00:03:21,800 --> 00:03:24,840 Speaker 1: fancy knowing me. She's like, girl, of course, I know you. 59 00:03:24,880 --> 00:03:27,240 Speaker 1: I love your work. I love what you do. You know, 60 00:03:27,400 --> 00:03:29,600 Speaker 1: I think you're amazing. Well I don't know if she 61 00:03:29,600 --> 00:03:32,720 Speaker 1: said all that, but that was basically what she had 62 00:03:32,760 --> 00:03:36,160 Speaker 1: met and she she just was so nice and I 63 00:03:36,200 --> 00:03:38,920 Speaker 1: asked her to take a picture and she did so. 64 00:03:39,000 --> 00:03:40,920 Speaker 1: If you have not seen my pictures for Meta. They're 65 00:03:40,960 --> 00:03:43,800 Speaker 1: all over the Bunjanista Ig. It was just a good time, 66 00:03:44,680 --> 00:03:48,120 Speaker 1: a good time, honey, and so I just it was 67 00:03:48,200 --> 00:03:50,960 Speaker 1: just one of those occasions where your work speaks for itself. 68 00:03:51,600 --> 00:03:53,640 Speaker 1: And that's what I want to talk to you about 69 00:03:53,760 --> 00:03:56,200 Speaker 1: to do. Man is not in here, So we're gonna 70 00:03:56,240 --> 00:03:59,200 Speaker 1: be acting up, honey, Hey ba fan, We're gonna take 71 00:03:59,240 --> 00:04:06,840 Speaker 1: a quick break and we'll be right back. You know, 72 00:04:06,880 --> 00:04:08,920 Speaker 1: I like me a little word. This morning, I was 73 00:04:08,960 --> 00:04:13,080 Speaker 1: talking to one of my mentees and oh, I gotta 74 00:04:13,120 --> 00:04:16,240 Speaker 1: hit Martin Batch. That's one of my other mentees. And 75 00:04:16,360 --> 00:04:21,320 Speaker 1: so he was sharing. So he's got a daughter and 76 00:04:22,720 --> 00:04:26,560 Speaker 1: he is coaching her softball team, and he said, kids 77 00:04:26,720 --> 00:04:30,479 Speaker 1: have this this thought that they can go light in 78 00:04:30,560 --> 00:04:35,440 Speaker 1: practice and they'll save it for the big game, right, 79 00:04:36,080 --> 00:04:39,400 Speaker 1: And he's been trying to teach them through sports that 80 00:04:39,560 --> 00:04:43,000 Speaker 1: the way you practice is the way you play. Oh, 81 00:04:43,160 --> 00:04:45,320 Speaker 1: that's a word, we're gonna call it that. That's what 82 00:04:45,320 --> 00:04:48,160 Speaker 1: we're gonna call the title of this episode. The way 83 00:04:48,200 --> 00:04:51,839 Speaker 1: you practice is the way you play, right. And so 84 00:04:51,880 --> 00:04:53,279 Speaker 1: he's been trying to teach like the girls on the 85 00:04:53,320 --> 00:04:57,239 Speaker 1: team then that you're not going to be your best 86 00:04:57,279 --> 00:04:59,760 Speaker 1: when you play, you think you are like you know, 87 00:05:00,040 --> 00:05:01,599 Speaker 1: like you ever see like you know, people are like 88 00:05:01,680 --> 00:05:04,039 Speaker 1: uh if they do like a they're practicing for a 89 00:05:04,040 --> 00:05:06,400 Speaker 1: play and actual play, and you know they're like, oh, 90 00:05:06,440 --> 00:05:08,680 Speaker 1: I'm gonna say the big number, the big note, you know, 91 00:05:08,760 --> 00:05:11,159 Speaker 1: my full voice for the play. No, you won't, because 92 00:05:11,200 --> 00:05:12,680 Speaker 1: the way you practice is the way you're going to 93 00:05:12,720 --> 00:05:15,359 Speaker 1: show up for the play. Anybody who's ever been in 94 00:05:15,400 --> 00:05:18,840 Speaker 1: any kind of production knows that at some point they 95 00:05:18,880 --> 00:05:23,080 Speaker 1: do at least one full dress rehearsal run through. They 96 00:05:23,120 --> 00:05:27,160 Speaker 1: put on like the clothes, the makeup, everything lights, everything's 97 00:05:27,200 --> 00:05:29,640 Speaker 1: exactly how it would be the night the play is 98 00:05:29,640 --> 00:05:33,000 Speaker 1: going to open, because they need to see all that's 99 00:05:33,040 --> 00:05:35,760 Speaker 1: going to be required for like to make sure that 100 00:05:35,880 --> 00:05:38,680 Speaker 1: the actual play is going to be successful. And the 101 00:05:38,720 --> 00:05:42,080 Speaker 1: truth of the matter is that your brain creates connections 102 00:05:42,760 --> 00:05:45,920 Speaker 1: in the practice that those are the connections that are 103 00:05:45,920 --> 00:05:49,120 Speaker 1: going to show up when it's showtime, baby. And why 104 00:05:49,200 --> 00:05:51,200 Speaker 1: is that a lesson on today? That is a lesson 105 00:05:51,240 --> 00:05:57,760 Speaker 1: because some of you are struggling during showtime because when 106 00:05:57,760 --> 00:06:01,440 Speaker 1: it's practice time, you're not fully doing the work. What 107 00:06:01,480 --> 00:06:04,840 Speaker 1: do I mean? So you tell yourself, man, if I 108 00:06:04,880 --> 00:06:07,000 Speaker 1: were to get, you know, one hundred thousand dollars, make 109 00:06:07,040 --> 00:06:09,920 Speaker 1: one hundred thousand dollars. This is how I would navigate. Well, 110 00:06:09,960 --> 00:06:14,960 Speaker 1: you currently make fifty. How are you navigating with fifty? Ah? Wait, hey, 111 00:06:16,000 --> 00:06:20,240 Speaker 1: you're reckless with the fifty, right. And so if you 112 00:06:20,440 --> 00:06:22,840 Speaker 1: think that having more money is going to make you 113 00:06:22,839 --> 00:06:27,120 Speaker 1: more responsible or smarter with your money, it's not why 114 00:06:27,200 --> 00:06:30,080 Speaker 1: because the way you practice is the way you what play? 115 00:06:30,200 --> 00:06:32,720 Speaker 1: Say it out loud. I see you on the train, 116 00:06:32,839 --> 00:06:35,520 Speaker 1: says I see you in the car, not in your head. 117 00:06:36,640 --> 00:06:40,200 Speaker 1: I see you washing dishes, I see you ironing, folding clothes. 118 00:06:40,800 --> 00:06:43,120 Speaker 1: I see you right on the peloton or the bike 119 00:06:43,200 --> 00:06:45,479 Speaker 1: or the treadmill. As you listen to this. The way 120 00:06:45,520 --> 00:06:47,200 Speaker 1: you practice is the way you what put your bring 121 00:06:47,200 --> 00:06:51,640 Speaker 1: in the air? Play? Okay? And so if you want 122 00:06:51,680 --> 00:06:53,920 Speaker 1: to be able to manage a lot of money, well 123 00:06:54,360 --> 00:06:58,440 Speaker 1: when you have a little, are you setting aside for savings? 124 00:06:58,560 --> 00:07:01,840 Speaker 1: Are you looking to see what investing might look like? 125 00:07:02,200 --> 00:07:06,960 Speaker 1: Are you living under your means? Living beneath your means 126 00:07:07,000 --> 00:07:08,720 Speaker 1: with the money that you currently have. I know that's 127 00:07:08,760 --> 00:07:11,520 Speaker 1: not always easy, But the way you practice, the way 128 00:07:11,560 --> 00:07:14,520 Speaker 1: you play that more money doesn't make you smarter with money. 129 00:07:14,600 --> 00:07:18,160 Speaker 1: You just become more of yourself if you are. Like 130 00:07:18,440 --> 00:07:21,080 Speaker 1: for me, everybody knows me. I've always been pretty thrifty, 131 00:07:21,160 --> 00:07:23,600 Speaker 1: and so I was thrifty with the little, thrifty with medium. 132 00:07:23,640 --> 00:07:26,800 Speaker 1: I'm still thrifty, relatively thrifty with a lot. But thrifty 133 00:07:26,880 --> 00:07:30,480 Speaker 1: just looks different, you know. Like thrifty with a little 134 00:07:30,720 --> 00:07:33,360 Speaker 1: was like okay, I didn't spend money on things that 135 00:07:33,400 --> 00:07:35,840 Speaker 1: I didn't need because that's all I could afford. Thrifty 136 00:07:35,880 --> 00:07:39,320 Speaker 1: with medium meant that like okay, with a little bit 137 00:07:39,320 --> 00:07:41,640 Speaker 1: of excess, I still save the little, invested a little, 138 00:07:41,760 --> 00:07:44,040 Speaker 1: and still spent under my means. Now that I have 139 00:07:44,160 --> 00:07:48,160 Speaker 1: a lot, I'm still relatively thrifty in that I still 140 00:07:48,200 --> 00:07:51,600 Speaker 1: live under thirty. I live under like thirty, sometimes even 141 00:07:51,680 --> 00:07:54,040 Speaker 1: ten percent of what I make. So although it's a 142 00:07:54,080 --> 00:07:56,520 Speaker 1: lot of money, ten percent of what I make, it's 143 00:07:56,560 --> 00:07:59,240 Speaker 1: still significantly less than what I could spend. And so 144 00:07:59,560 --> 00:08:02,600 Speaker 1: because the way I practice is the way I'm currently playing, 145 00:08:03,160 --> 00:08:06,200 Speaker 1: that's just how it goes, I thought to myself. So like, 146 00:08:06,280 --> 00:08:09,240 Speaker 1: for example, when I did the meta, when I knew 147 00:08:09,280 --> 00:08:12,960 Speaker 1: that I was going to get an opportunity to self 148 00:08:13,000 --> 00:08:17,960 Speaker 1: introduce myself. So sometimes they'll read your bio and sometimes 149 00:08:17,960 --> 00:08:19,680 Speaker 1: I'll say, you know, tell you know, tell the audience 150 00:08:19,680 --> 00:08:23,840 Speaker 1: about yourself. So that morning, I said, let me practice. 151 00:08:24,720 --> 00:08:27,800 Speaker 1: And because I have before, because I've done so many 152 00:08:27,840 --> 00:08:31,280 Speaker 1: speaking engagements, there have been times when I've said to myself, 153 00:08:32,240 --> 00:08:34,000 Speaker 1: I don't really need to practice because already know, girl, 154 00:08:34,040 --> 00:08:36,320 Speaker 1: I do this ton of times. And every time I 155 00:08:36,480 --> 00:08:40,120 Speaker 1: do that, I always end up forgetting something or I 156 00:08:40,120 --> 00:08:42,320 Speaker 1: could have done a better job. But I said, not 157 00:08:42,440 --> 00:08:45,120 Speaker 1: at meta, not in this room with the most powerful 158 00:08:45,400 --> 00:08:47,680 Speaker 1: one hundred and fifty women like in this room, right, 159 00:08:48,520 --> 00:08:51,600 Speaker 1: And so I said, what is it? Before I left, 160 00:08:51,640 --> 00:08:53,440 Speaker 1: Before I got they sent a car for me. All 161 00:08:53,480 --> 00:08:56,360 Speaker 1: that before the makeup lady came. Before everything I told 162 00:08:56,400 --> 00:08:58,800 Speaker 1: my asked myself, I said, what do you want this 163 00:08:58,920 --> 00:09:01,240 Speaker 1: room of one hundred and fifty women to know and 164 00:09:01,360 --> 00:09:04,559 Speaker 1: do when it comes to you? I said, one many 165 00:09:04,559 --> 00:09:07,000 Speaker 1: of them may not know anything about my work. I 166 00:09:07,040 --> 00:09:10,160 Speaker 1: want them to know that I serve women, especially black 167 00:09:10,160 --> 00:09:12,200 Speaker 1: and brown women when it comes to personal finance. I 168 00:09:12,240 --> 00:09:13,959 Speaker 1: want them to know in the ways that I've served 169 00:09:14,000 --> 00:09:17,600 Speaker 1: them and what accolades have already accumulated, so they can say, wow, 170 00:09:17,640 --> 00:09:20,600 Speaker 1: this is a legitimate person. Obviously one, she's here at META, 171 00:09:20,679 --> 00:09:22,840 Speaker 1: but I did not know the scope of the work 172 00:09:22,880 --> 00:09:25,120 Speaker 1: that she's done. So that was one. I said, I 173 00:09:25,120 --> 00:09:27,760 Speaker 1: want them to know that about me. And then two, 174 00:09:28,480 --> 00:09:31,760 Speaker 1: I want to position myself to partner with some of 175 00:09:31,760 --> 00:09:34,280 Speaker 1: these women in the room, to give them ideas about 176 00:09:34,280 --> 00:09:36,920 Speaker 1: what partnership could look like with me. That was two, 177 00:09:37,679 --> 00:09:39,280 Speaker 1: no more than three things. That's what I was thinking 178 00:09:39,240 --> 00:09:41,960 Speaker 1: when I'm speaking. But those are my two things. And 179 00:09:42,040 --> 00:09:46,040 Speaker 1: so I practiced my speech. I said, Okay, Tiffany, if 180 00:09:46,080 --> 00:09:48,640 Speaker 1: you're like, oh, hey, my name is Tiffany, one of 181 00:09:48,720 --> 00:09:50,520 Speaker 1: the things you want them to know about you. So 182 00:09:50,920 --> 00:09:52,679 Speaker 1: if I had not practiced, I would have been like, oh, 183 00:09:52,679 --> 00:09:54,000 Speaker 1: I would have been running on and on and on 184 00:09:54,120 --> 00:09:58,000 Speaker 1: all my name, Tiffany's finance, education women and blah blah 185 00:09:58,040 --> 00:10:02,160 Speaker 1: lah la. Because on Monday, so the thing was on Wednesday, 186 00:10:02,920 --> 00:10:05,800 Speaker 1: the META breakfast. On Monday, we had done a run 187 00:10:05,840 --> 00:10:10,559 Speaker 1: through with the organizers of the event, and so they 188 00:10:10,559 --> 00:10:12,240 Speaker 1: did that. They said, oh, Tiffany, you know, do a 189 00:10:12,280 --> 00:10:14,120 Speaker 1: quick two to three minute spiel about yourself. And I 190 00:10:14,160 --> 00:10:15,640 Speaker 1: just went on and on and on, and I realized 191 00:10:15,760 --> 00:10:17,480 Speaker 1: that's I don't want to do it on stage. No, No, 192 00:10:17,800 --> 00:10:19,600 Speaker 1: what did I wanted to know? I said, I want 193 00:10:19,640 --> 00:10:22,520 Speaker 1: them to know numbers. I want them to be like, Okay, 194 00:10:22,559 --> 00:10:24,680 Speaker 1: she's fun and light hearted, easy to work with, so 195 00:10:24,800 --> 00:10:27,559 Speaker 1: I always start with hey, hey, hey, and everybody left. 196 00:10:27,559 --> 00:10:29,360 Speaker 1: I was like, hey, hey, hey, it's I love to 197 00:10:29,400 --> 00:10:32,079 Speaker 1: start with that. My name is Tiffany ch Aka. The 198 00:10:32,080 --> 00:10:35,760 Speaker 1: budget needs done, and I teach financial education to women, 199 00:10:36,559 --> 00:10:39,480 Speaker 1: especially to women of color, most specifically to black women. 200 00:10:39,760 --> 00:10:42,440 Speaker 1: For the last fifteen years, number number one, I had 201 00:10:42,440 --> 00:10:45,600 Speaker 1: been able to serve nearly three million women. Number number two, 202 00:10:46,000 --> 00:10:49,400 Speaker 1: number yeah, number two on their financial journey through my 203 00:10:49,520 --> 00:10:53,440 Speaker 1: online school Boom. She had an online school through my 204 00:10:53,480 --> 00:10:55,679 Speaker 1: New York Times bestseller, best selling book. She had a 205 00:10:55,679 --> 00:10:59,400 Speaker 1: New York Times bestseller. And I forgot when I said 206 00:10:59,400 --> 00:11:02,280 Speaker 1: online school news times that sell my award winning podcast, Okay, 207 00:11:02,320 --> 00:11:07,720 Speaker 1: Boom Brian Ambition And what else did I say? I said, 208 00:11:07,760 --> 00:11:11,560 Speaker 1: I wanted them to know that. And I also said, uh, 209 00:11:11,640 --> 00:11:14,000 Speaker 1: it's my mission to help as many women because they 210 00:11:14,120 --> 00:11:15,520 Speaker 1: want them to know my mission to see they want 211 00:11:15,520 --> 00:11:18,400 Speaker 1: to help on that mission, get and stay on financial track, 212 00:11:18,880 --> 00:11:22,880 Speaker 1: I said. Four years ago this month, which was February 213 00:11:22,880 --> 00:11:26,559 Speaker 1: at the time, I work with Assembly women Angela pe 214 00:11:26,600 --> 00:11:28,760 Speaker 1: McKnight in my stay of New Jersey to get the 215 00:11:28,800 --> 00:11:31,680 Speaker 1: budget needs to law past Law A one four one 216 00:11:31,760 --> 00:11:35,040 Speaker 1: four making financial education mandatory for all middle school students 217 00:11:35,080 --> 00:11:37,160 Speaker 1: in the state of New Jersey. Boom, they were like 218 00:11:37,240 --> 00:11:39,520 Speaker 1: what they started to clap. So there was like four 219 00:11:39,640 --> 00:11:42,600 Speaker 1: or five different things that I wanted to infuse into 220 00:11:42,640 --> 00:11:45,520 Speaker 1: my biome. When I introduced myself, it was like a 221 00:11:45,559 --> 00:11:48,360 Speaker 1: minute and a half two minute most, but it was like, Okay, 222 00:11:48,440 --> 00:11:51,280 Speaker 1: I set the stage, but that wasn't it. That was 223 00:11:51,320 --> 00:11:53,440 Speaker 1: just a bio. They gave us the questions ahead of time, 224 00:11:54,000 --> 00:11:55,719 Speaker 1: and I was like, Okay, when are you going to 225 00:11:55,800 --> 00:11:59,120 Speaker 1: infuse things into these questions? So I know, for example, 226 00:11:59,120 --> 00:12:03,120 Speaker 1: I want to start to get sponsorships for my online school, 227 00:12:03,640 --> 00:12:06,760 Speaker 1: the Literature Academy, and so one of the things I 228 00:12:06,760 --> 00:12:08,760 Speaker 1: forget one of the questions, but I infused into that 229 00:12:08,840 --> 00:12:12,600 Speaker 1: question because I had practiced it. I have already graduated 230 00:12:12,640 --> 00:12:16,080 Speaker 1: one hundred and fifty thousand women since my school opened 231 00:12:16,120 --> 00:12:19,360 Speaker 1: eight years ago, and as a result, I can share 232 00:12:19,920 --> 00:12:22,640 Speaker 1: that what I've learned about from those women is that 233 00:12:22,679 --> 00:12:24,440 Speaker 1: this is what women want. Because the question was like 234 00:12:24,640 --> 00:12:26,360 Speaker 1: something about like you know what are some of the 235 00:12:26,400 --> 00:12:29,160 Speaker 1: financial challenges or whatever something like that women face. But 236 00:12:29,200 --> 00:12:32,960 Speaker 1: do you see how I infuse like you graduated one 237 00:12:33,000 --> 00:12:36,720 Speaker 1: hundred and fifty thousand women from your school. What's going 238 00:12:36,760 --> 00:12:40,480 Speaker 1: on here? Because I practiced it so when it was 239 00:12:40,520 --> 00:12:44,520 Speaker 1: time to play, when it was showtime, I was ready. 240 00:12:44,600 --> 00:12:47,000 Speaker 1: And so my sister, tracing my pupaicis with me, she 241 00:12:47,080 --> 00:12:48,520 Speaker 1: was like, wow, the way you were dropping numbers. I 242 00:12:48,520 --> 00:12:51,400 Speaker 1: mean I was getting applause, applause, applause. But that does 243 00:12:51,440 --> 00:12:53,920 Speaker 1: not happen when I don't practice. I don't always practice, 244 00:12:54,080 --> 00:12:56,040 Speaker 1: and I always regret it when I don't. I remember 245 00:12:56,080 --> 00:12:57,800 Speaker 1: one time I did, like a news show, I can't remember, 246 00:12:57,880 --> 00:12:59,920 Speaker 1: it was Picked eleven or whatever, and I was just 247 00:13:00,000 --> 00:13:02,160 Speaker 1: so tired. I didn't get a chance to practice. And 248 00:13:02,200 --> 00:13:03,679 Speaker 1: it showed and I told my sister I didn't get 249 00:13:03,679 --> 00:13:05,640 Speaker 1: a chance to practice. She said, I know. She said 250 00:13:05,679 --> 00:13:08,040 Speaker 1: it wasn't bad. But I know you when you practice, 251 00:13:08,280 --> 00:13:10,880 Speaker 1: you know. And so you have to ask yourself if 252 00:13:10,920 --> 00:13:14,240 Speaker 1: you are in a position where things are not going 253 00:13:14,440 --> 00:13:17,440 Speaker 1: the way you want them to go, if like your 254 00:13:17,480 --> 00:13:22,520 Speaker 1: business or your money or your career, what does practice 255 00:13:22,559 --> 00:13:26,040 Speaker 1: look like? Because here's the thing. The tree is gonna 256 00:13:26,040 --> 00:13:29,120 Speaker 1: bear the fruit, honey. Like so one of my when 257 00:13:29,160 --> 00:13:30,800 Speaker 1: my mentees come to me and they hit me with 258 00:13:30,840 --> 00:13:33,160 Speaker 1: a yang yang yan yang about why does not working out? 259 00:13:33,200 --> 00:13:34,559 Speaker 1: Why it is not working out? Da da da. I'm like, 260 00:13:35,440 --> 00:13:40,760 Speaker 1: let's show me the fruit. Show me the fruit, meaning 261 00:13:40,960 --> 00:13:44,280 Speaker 1: the results. If these are your results, it is a 262 00:13:44,320 --> 00:13:48,480 Speaker 1: direct indicator of the tree. The tree is you the work. 263 00:13:49,120 --> 00:13:53,360 Speaker 1: So if your fruit is not fruitful, that means your 264 00:13:53,400 --> 00:13:55,680 Speaker 1: tree is not doing what it needs to do. That 265 00:13:55,720 --> 00:13:57,760 Speaker 1: means you're not doing what you need to do. I'm 266 00:13:57,760 --> 00:14:01,160 Speaker 1: not saying you're not working hard, but working hard is 267 00:14:01,200 --> 00:14:04,160 Speaker 1: not the same as doing what you need to do. 268 00:14:09,000 --> 00:14:11,600 Speaker 1: So sometimes you think to yourself, like I'm at the 269 00:14:11,640 --> 00:14:15,679 Speaker 1: gym every day, I'm doing all this cardio, but you're 270 00:14:15,679 --> 00:14:19,040 Speaker 1: not lifting weightsis well, you know what. Cardio is great 271 00:14:19,120 --> 00:14:21,200 Speaker 1: for your heart and your lungs, but you want them, 272 00:14:21,240 --> 00:14:23,920 Speaker 1: you want your shoulders looking like Michelle Obama. It's not 273 00:14:23,960 --> 00:14:27,600 Speaker 1: gonna have exist not on the treadmill. So you working hard, 274 00:14:27,600 --> 00:14:29,360 Speaker 1: you want to you want a treadmill three hours a day, 275 00:14:29,600 --> 00:14:31,520 Speaker 1: and you think you're gonna cut your arms up. How 276 00:14:31,680 --> 00:14:36,200 Speaker 1: make it make sense? Make it make sense? It won't 277 00:14:36,360 --> 00:14:38,520 Speaker 1: you know like you say you want to lose weight 278 00:14:38,520 --> 00:14:41,600 Speaker 1: and you're always in the gym, but guess what. Ninety 279 00:14:41,640 --> 00:14:44,400 Speaker 1: percent of that weighsis is the kitchen, what you're eating. 280 00:14:46,160 --> 00:14:48,920 Speaker 1: That's how you practicing. Like you ever, if you have 281 00:14:48,960 --> 00:14:52,360 Speaker 1: a trainer, your trainer can tell like that that you know, 282 00:14:52,400 --> 00:14:54,400 Speaker 1: you haven't been doing anything in between, or you've been 283 00:14:54,440 --> 00:14:57,880 Speaker 1: overeating or whatever. It is right because the way you 284 00:14:57,920 --> 00:15:00,760 Speaker 1: practice is the way you play. And so if your 285 00:15:01,240 --> 00:15:03,120 Speaker 1: tree is not bearing the fruit that you're wanting it 286 00:15:03,160 --> 00:15:05,360 Speaker 1: to bear, you have to ask yourself what am I 287 00:15:05,400 --> 00:15:08,200 Speaker 1: doing at the tree level? Because at the end of 288 00:15:08,240 --> 00:15:11,200 Speaker 1: the day, you know, because some people will just say, oh, well, 289 00:15:11,600 --> 00:15:13,240 Speaker 1: you know, like I am doing I'm supposed to do. 290 00:15:13,280 --> 00:15:15,280 Speaker 1: It's just not that that's not true. An orange tree 291 00:15:15,320 --> 00:15:18,200 Speaker 1: is never going to bear apples, so you can certainly 292 00:15:18,240 --> 00:15:21,280 Speaker 1: blame the fruit and then never succeed. Or you can 293 00:15:21,320 --> 00:15:23,560 Speaker 1: look in the mirror and say, what do I need 294 00:15:23,600 --> 00:15:25,720 Speaker 1: to do differently? How do I need to show up 295 00:15:25,720 --> 00:15:28,320 Speaker 1: differently day to day so when it is showtime, I 296 00:15:28,360 --> 00:15:32,160 Speaker 1: get to show out. Right. Some people are begging for 297 00:15:32,200 --> 00:15:35,120 Speaker 1: the opportunity, but the opportunity is not going to come 298 00:15:35,280 --> 00:15:37,640 Speaker 1: because you refuse to do the behind the scenes work. 299 00:15:38,760 --> 00:15:41,240 Speaker 1: You want to be on Good Morning America, but you 300 00:15:41,320 --> 00:15:44,320 Speaker 1: haven't practice. Are you doing media training? What are you 301 00:15:44,320 --> 00:15:47,120 Speaker 1: gonna wear? Do you have a makeup artist ready? What 302 00:15:47,440 --> 00:15:49,720 Speaker 1: will your hair look like? You know? Do you know 303 00:15:49,760 --> 00:15:52,040 Speaker 1: how to speak in sound bites? One of the ladies 304 00:15:52,080 --> 00:15:54,680 Speaker 1: came up to me after the meta things. She's like, girl, 305 00:15:54,920 --> 00:15:57,560 Speaker 1: all your little sound bites. That was amazing because I 306 00:15:58,800 --> 00:16:00,920 Speaker 1: watched a podcast or read a books some years ago 307 00:16:01,160 --> 00:16:04,440 Speaker 1: about when you do media and press, how you have 308 00:16:04,520 --> 00:16:06,320 Speaker 1: to learn how to like you know, like how I 309 00:16:06,400 --> 00:16:08,520 Speaker 1: just said, the way you practice is the way you play. 310 00:16:08,920 --> 00:16:10,880 Speaker 1: Y'all have heard me say need it? Love it? Like it? 311 00:16:10,960 --> 00:16:13,960 Speaker 1: Won't it? Those are your spending priorities. Those are sound bites. 312 00:16:13,960 --> 00:16:16,840 Speaker 1: Those are little clips that people can clip and take 313 00:16:16,880 --> 00:16:19,200 Speaker 1: home with them or put on social media or put 314 00:16:19,240 --> 00:16:21,920 Speaker 1: on TV or whatever. I learned to speak in sound 315 00:16:21,920 --> 00:16:24,520 Speaker 1: bites for when I do media and press. And you 316 00:16:24,560 --> 00:16:27,360 Speaker 1: can't answer a question in ten minutes on the Today Show? 317 00:16:28,400 --> 00:16:30,520 Speaker 1: How can you people raise their credit? How can people 318 00:16:30,560 --> 00:16:34,160 Speaker 1: start to budget? Well, Robin roberts, they can split it 319 00:16:34,200 --> 00:16:38,360 Speaker 1: before they get it. And Robin said, that's interesting. What 320 00:16:38,400 --> 00:16:40,040 Speaker 1: does that mean? Split before you get it. It's a 321 00:16:40,080 --> 00:16:43,520 Speaker 1: sound bite. Well, you're going to go to payroll and say, 322 00:16:43,560 --> 00:16:45,880 Speaker 1: can you split my check before you get before I 323 00:16:45,960 --> 00:16:49,120 Speaker 1: get my check? Okay, then how does that work? Here 324 00:16:49,120 --> 00:16:53,360 Speaker 1: are the four bank accounts, your bills checking account, your 325 00:16:53,720 --> 00:16:57,720 Speaker 1: your spending checking account, your long term savings account for emergencies, 326 00:16:57,960 --> 00:17:00,880 Speaker 1: and then you're saving, well you're savings for emergencies and 327 00:17:00,880 --> 00:17:03,320 Speaker 1: you're saving for long term savings. Those are your four 328 00:17:05,320 --> 00:17:08,399 Speaker 1: bank accounts, Robin Roberts And she's like, okay, but do 329 00:17:08,480 --> 00:17:12,040 Speaker 1: you see Like but that takes practice because what you 330 00:17:12,119 --> 00:17:15,399 Speaker 1: don't want actually is to have to do the play 331 00:17:15,800 --> 00:17:17,800 Speaker 1: without the practice, because you might not never get another 332 00:17:17,880 --> 00:17:19,760 Speaker 1: opportunity to go back out again. You go on a 333 00:17:19,760 --> 00:17:23,560 Speaker 1: Good Morning America and they're like, she can't come back. 334 00:17:23,720 --> 00:17:27,119 Speaker 1: This is why, quite honestly, Like you see people like 335 00:17:27,640 --> 00:17:29,560 Speaker 1: in January, Good Morning America wanted me to come on 336 00:17:29,600 --> 00:17:31,919 Speaker 1: three times. I'm like, is there anybody else? But you 337 00:17:31,960 --> 00:17:34,359 Speaker 1: want to know why, because they don't have the time 338 00:17:34,400 --> 00:17:38,680 Speaker 1: for you to practice live the happening to practice live. 339 00:17:39,000 --> 00:17:41,360 Speaker 1: They're like, who has been on? Who have we sent 340 00:17:41,400 --> 00:17:47,280 Speaker 1: on TV? Who delivers Tiffany? And so for me, if 341 00:17:47,280 --> 00:17:49,639 Speaker 1: you're like, well, how do I practice for something like that? 342 00:17:49,720 --> 00:17:52,240 Speaker 1: For me, one of the best ways I started to 343 00:17:52,280 --> 00:17:54,879 Speaker 1: practice was going live. I used to go live on 344 00:17:54,920 --> 00:17:58,680 Speaker 1: social media all the time just to practice. I would 345 00:17:58,720 --> 00:18:01,159 Speaker 1: practice a segment for TV on live and I just 346 00:18:01,200 --> 00:18:04,560 Speaker 1: wouldn't save it with y'all. I would practice a speech 347 00:18:04,840 --> 00:18:06,679 Speaker 1: where I'm like, Okay, I'm doing a keynot remember one time. 348 00:18:06,680 --> 00:18:08,520 Speaker 1: I'm like, I'm doing a keynote in a couple days, 349 00:18:08,520 --> 00:18:10,439 Speaker 1: I'm gonna practice with y'all, and I would just I 350 00:18:10,560 --> 00:18:12,920 Speaker 1: just do the keynote to work out some stuff to see, 351 00:18:12,960 --> 00:18:16,320 Speaker 1: like in the comments, where are you guys loling? Where 352 00:18:16,359 --> 00:18:19,639 Speaker 1: you guys say ooh, that's a good one. And it 353 00:18:19,680 --> 00:18:22,000 Speaker 1: got me comfortable in front of the camera. It got 354 00:18:22,040 --> 00:18:25,240 Speaker 1: me comfortable speaking. Also, I get to listen to my cadence. 355 00:18:25,480 --> 00:18:29,359 Speaker 1: I tend to speak really fast naturally, and so I 356 00:18:29,440 --> 00:18:32,520 Speaker 1: have to learn to slow down for TV, and I 357 00:18:32,560 --> 00:18:35,040 Speaker 1: could be a little faster when I'm in person. But 358 00:18:35,080 --> 00:18:37,720 Speaker 1: do you see like the way I was practicing was 359 00:18:37,720 --> 00:18:40,520 Speaker 1: I used to go live, darn there every day, darn 360 00:18:40,520 --> 00:18:42,840 Speaker 1: there every day, sometimes for hours. I would be live 361 00:18:42,840 --> 00:18:44,919 Speaker 1: and they'd be like, Tiffany is bugging. I'm like, no, 362 00:18:44,960 --> 00:18:47,520 Speaker 1: I have one hundred thousand dollars keynote that I'm doing 363 00:18:47,800 --> 00:18:50,080 Speaker 1: in two days, So y'all gonna get this on the live. 364 00:18:50,280 --> 00:18:53,000 Speaker 1: So I know I'm red D so I could collect 365 00:18:53,000 --> 00:18:56,040 Speaker 1: my coin in two days, you know. And so I 366 00:18:56,080 --> 00:18:58,720 Speaker 1: just want you to remind you of them, and that 367 00:18:58,880 --> 00:19:01,240 Speaker 1: if the fruit that you are currently bearing is not 368 00:19:01,359 --> 00:19:04,280 Speaker 1: what you're wanting, it's not quite as healthy, it's not 369 00:19:04,400 --> 00:19:09,760 Speaker 1: quite as as fruitful, is not quite as abundant, then 370 00:19:09,800 --> 00:19:11,960 Speaker 1: you have to ask yourself, what is the tree doing? 371 00:19:12,320 --> 00:19:14,640 Speaker 1: What are you doing? You have to shift it at 372 00:19:14,680 --> 00:19:18,160 Speaker 1: the tree level, which is you. It's like the bad 373 00:19:18,200 --> 00:19:21,320 Speaker 1: news SIS is you, but the good news is Sis, 374 00:19:21,400 --> 00:19:23,560 Speaker 1: it's you, honey. That means you could change it at 375 00:19:23,560 --> 00:19:27,680 Speaker 1: any time, because the way you practice is what. The 376 00:19:27,800 --> 00:19:32,080 Speaker 1: way you play, the way you navigate your money, the 377 00:19:32,119 --> 00:19:33,880 Speaker 1: way you show up at work, the way you show 378 00:19:33,960 --> 00:19:36,040 Speaker 1: up in your business in all areas, the way you 379 00:19:36,080 --> 00:19:38,520 Speaker 1: show up in your relationship. You know, you ever see 380 00:19:38,560 --> 00:19:40,520 Speaker 1: the couples that go out like it's awkward to go 381 00:19:40,560 --> 00:19:42,360 Speaker 1: out to dinner with them because they be all tight 382 00:19:42,400 --> 00:19:46,080 Speaker 1: with each other. It's obvious. I'm like, y'all stay fighting 383 00:19:46,119 --> 00:19:48,280 Speaker 1: at home. I could tell because they got dinner like 384 00:19:48,640 --> 00:19:53,760 Speaker 1: Charles also type lift, could you possibly the specular? And Charles' 385 00:19:53,760 --> 00:19:56,359 Speaker 1: is like, you're always escaped for the specular, and You're like, 386 00:19:56,400 --> 00:19:58,520 Speaker 1: what the hell is going on here? They think they 387 00:19:58,600 --> 00:20:03,240 Speaker 1: fooling somebody. I'm like, y'all be fighting all the time 388 00:20:03,280 --> 00:20:05,840 Speaker 1: at home, don't you why? Because the way you practice 389 00:20:05,840 --> 00:20:07,520 Speaker 1: at home is the way you play outside at dinner 390 00:20:07,520 --> 00:20:11,119 Speaker 1: with your friends, get her together at home, you could tell. 391 00:20:11,400 --> 00:20:13,720 Speaker 1: You could tell the couples that are like, oh, having 392 00:20:13,720 --> 00:20:16,280 Speaker 1: a good time, loving and laughing at home because in 393 00:20:16,320 --> 00:20:19,200 Speaker 1: public they loving and laughing in public because you can't 394 00:20:19,400 --> 00:20:22,720 Speaker 1: hide it says the fruit that you're bearing is an 395 00:20:22,760 --> 00:20:26,680 Speaker 1: indicator of the tree, you know. So if you want 396 00:20:26,720 --> 00:20:28,800 Speaker 1: a good relationship, are you putting in the effort. I 397 00:20:28,840 --> 00:20:30,760 Speaker 1: was just talking to a friend of mine the other day. 398 00:20:31,119 --> 00:20:33,399 Speaker 1: Her friend just got engaged, and some men meant me 399 00:20:33,400 --> 00:20:36,840 Speaker 1: to ask her. I say, how is she and her fiance? 400 00:20:37,000 --> 00:20:38,639 Speaker 1: She said, what makes you ask? I said, I don't know. 401 00:20:38,680 --> 00:20:42,560 Speaker 1: I just get this underlying current that hm, it's a 402 00:20:42,600 --> 00:20:45,879 Speaker 1: little not so great. And she said, well, your current 403 00:20:45,920 --> 00:20:47,760 Speaker 1: is right, Like you know, they're having a hard time. 404 00:20:48,320 --> 00:20:51,560 Speaker 1: And one of the reasons why, to me, people have 405 00:20:51,600 --> 00:20:56,040 Speaker 1: a hard time in relationships is that folks don't understand 406 00:20:56,119 --> 00:21:01,320 Speaker 1: that relationships take work. That's the practice. Now here's the thing. 407 00:21:01,400 --> 00:21:04,640 Speaker 1: People hear the wad, hear the word work, and they 408 00:21:04,680 --> 00:21:10,040 Speaker 1: think that I mean that it feels heavy, and oh boy, 409 00:21:10,040 --> 00:21:12,480 Speaker 1: I gotta work to make sure this food is no 410 00:21:12,480 --> 00:21:15,000 Speaker 1: no, no no. And maybe the word work is too heavy 411 00:21:15,040 --> 00:21:17,159 Speaker 1: of a word. And the word I should use this 412 00:21:17,320 --> 00:21:22,320 Speaker 1: effort because effort can be delightful, as can work. So 413 00:21:22,520 --> 00:21:27,240 Speaker 1: when Jerell was still here, I would practice figuring out 414 00:21:27,280 --> 00:21:29,560 Speaker 1: ways to put a smile on his face. That's work, 415 00:21:30,119 --> 00:21:35,879 Speaker 1: that's joyful effort work, right, So like, Okay, I know 416 00:21:35,920 --> 00:21:38,399 Speaker 1: how much he likes German chocolate cake was like his 417 00:21:38,480 --> 00:21:41,480 Speaker 1: favorite at one point cake, so I knew for like, 418 00:21:41,560 --> 00:21:43,359 Speaker 1: and that's not an easy cake to find. So I 419 00:21:43,440 --> 00:21:45,320 Speaker 1: knew for his birthday that I was gonna surprise and 420 00:21:45,359 --> 00:21:48,040 Speaker 1: get that for him. And Jarell really loved lasagna and 421 00:21:48,040 --> 00:21:49,480 Speaker 1: he loved when I make it. Y'all know, I don't cook. 422 00:21:49,600 --> 00:21:51,720 Speaker 1: I mean I can cook, I just don't like to cook. Particularly. 423 00:21:51,840 --> 00:21:54,159 Speaker 1: I don't hate it, but it's just your girl's busy. 424 00:21:54,680 --> 00:21:57,760 Speaker 1: But certain times I would be like, okay, I'm gonna 425 00:21:57,800 --> 00:22:00,560 Speaker 1: go this weekend to the supermarket and get all the fixings, 426 00:22:00,560 --> 00:22:03,359 Speaker 1: and I'm gonna surprise him and make him a lasagna, 427 00:22:03,480 --> 00:22:05,439 Speaker 1: not for his birthday, not for any other reason, but 428 00:22:05,560 --> 00:22:06,879 Speaker 1: just because. And I knew I was gonna put a 429 00:22:06,880 --> 00:22:09,920 Speaker 1: smile on his face, or you know, the next time 430 00:22:10,240 --> 00:22:12,360 Speaker 1: he drives his car, I will have filled it up, 431 00:22:13,240 --> 00:22:15,560 Speaker 1: or like I'm gonna put Like I remember, I bought 432 00:22:15,560 --> 00:22:18,640 Speaker 1: these sticky notes that had hearts on them, and one 433 00:22:18,640 --> 00:22:22,520 Speaker 1: weekend I like wrote all these really beautiful like messages 434 00:22:22,560 --> 00:22:24,560 Speaker 1: to him and put it all around the notes, like 435 00:22:24,600 --> 00:22:27,199 Speaker 1: in his sock drawer and the underwear drawer here places 436 00:22:27,200 --> 00:22:29,040 Speaker 1: I know he would open and there was like a delight. 437 00:22:29,320 --> 00:22:31,679 Speaker 1: It was like months later we were still finding sticky notes, 438 00:22:32,040 --> 00:22:34,720 Speaker 1: you know, and he would do the same thing, those 439 00:22:34,760 --> 00:22:36,520 Speaker 1: types of things for me, And that's why I started 440 00:22:36,560 --> 00:22:38,159 Speaker 1: to do them, because he was really romantic like that. 441 00:22:38,720 --> 00:22:41,879 Speaker 1: Like I remember one anniversary, I was like, I think 442 00:22:41,920 --> 00:22:46,360 Speaker 1: probably told the story, but I jurell knows that like Chiad, 443 00:22:46,400 --> 00:22:48,080 Speaker 1: if there's one thing that you could set your clock to, 444 00:22:48,240 --> 00:22:49,440 Speaker 1: Tiffy go and wake up in the middle of the 445 00:22:49,480 --> 00:22:52,080 Speaker 1: night to go peek, because this bladders not let me 446 00:22:52,119 --> 00:22:55,840 Speaker 1: sleep through the night, not on today or tomorrow. And 447 00:22:55,880 --> 00:22:59,280 Speaker 1: so I woke up middle of the night, you know 448 00:22:59,359 --> 00:23:01,199 Speaker 1: the day were for our anniversary or the night I 449 00:23:01,200 --> 00:23:03,760 Speaker 1: guess of what if our anniversary? And I'm headed to 450 00:23:03,800 --> 00:23:06,560 Speaker 1: the bathroom, like what is that noise? I hear music playing? 451 00:23:07,320 --> 00:23:12,160 Speaker 1: I'm like, is there is there somebody in the bathroom? Child? 452 00:23:12,240 --> 00:23:16,439 Speaker 1: This man had put his phone on repeat that Tony 453 00:23:16,480 --> 00:23:25,960 Speaker 1: Tony Tony song. Do you know what two days it's anniversary? Anniversary? 454 00:23:26,080 --> 00:23:29,639 Speaker 1: He had that He waited for me to go to sleep, 455 00:23:30,000 --> 00:23:33,480 Speaker 1: set up his phone in the bathroom playing that music. 456 00:23:34,359 --> 00:23:39,399 Speaker 1: Had rose petals all over the dagone bathroom and it 457 00:23:39,480 --> 00:23:41,040 Speaker 1: was like a candle burning, which I was like, child, 458 00:23:41,040 --> 00:23:43,080 Speaker 1: he's trying to burn us down. A candle burning. But 459 00:23:43,960 --> 00:23:46,760 Speaker 1: also this beautiful necklace that he bought me, and it 460 00:23:46,840 --> 00:23:48,520 Speaker 1: was something else, I think perfume, because he always brought 461 00:23:48,560 --> 00:23:51,520 Speaker 1: me like the best perfume. And I just remember being 462 00:23:51,640 --> 00:23:56,080 Speaker 1: like the effort because I'm like a late sleeper so too, 463 00:23:56,200 --> 00:23:57,800 Speaker 1: and he had always had to get up early. He 464 00:23:57,840 --> 00:23:59,639 Speaker 1: always had to get up early in the morning to 465 00:23:59,760 --> 00:24:01,800 Speaker 1: wait for me to fall asleep. I didn't even know 466 00:24:01,840 --> 00:24:03,800 Speaker 1: where those flowers were, maybe in the car and where 467 00:24:03,840 --> 00:24:05,960 Speaker 1: all these other things were hidden to wait for me 468 00:24:06,000 --> 00:24:08,720 Speaker 1: to fall asleep, to set it up, knowing Tiffany's going 469 00:24:08,760 --> 00:24:09,840 Speaker 1: to go to the rath and may have to be 470 00:24:10,200 --> 00:24:11,800 Speaker 1: in the middle of the night, and she's gonna wake 471 00:24:11,880 --> 00:24:14,840 Speaker 1: up and see that. And it was just so beautiful. 472 00:24:15,640 --> 00:24:18,200 Speaker 1: And he taught me the effort and the big things 473 00:24:18,200 --> 00:24:21,760 Speaker 1: and the small things. And as a result of us 474 00:24:22,040 --> 00:24:26,080 Speaker 1: always working on our relationship, it reflected when it was 475 00:24:26,160 --> 00:24:28,920 Speaker 1: showtime outside in the streets, people would tell us like, 476 00:24:28,960 --> 00:24:30,239 Speaker 1: oh my god, I could just tell you guys love 477 00:24:30,280 --> 00:24:32,760 Speaker 1: each other so much. We didn't have to put on, 478 00:24:33,760 --> 00:24:36,040 Speaker 1: you know, during the showtime, because it was like, we 479 00:24:36,119 --> 00:24:38,800 Speaker 1: got to play the way we practice. This is how 480 00:24:38,840 --> 00:24:41,000 Speaker 1: we are at home, and so when you see us 481 00:24:41,000 --> 00:24:42,560 Speaker 1: out and about, this is how we are out and 482 00:24:42,600 --> 00:24:46,320 Speaker 1: about too. So in every area of your life. You know, 483 00:24:46,400 --> 00:24:49,119 Speaker 1: you want a good relationship with your sister, do you 484 00:24:49,160 --> 00:24:52,959 Speaker 1: call her weekly? Do you you want a good relationship 485 00:24:52,960 --> 00:24:54,800 Speaker 1: with your parents? Do you go see them with your 486 00:24:54,880 --> 00:24:57,000 Speaker 1: nieces and your nephews? Are you expecting your fifteen year 487 00:24:57,000 --> 00:24:58,159 Speaker 1: old needs to be the one to reach out to 488 00:24:58,200 --> 00:25:03,439 Speaker 1: you right? Are you practicing the way you want to play? 489 00:25:03,600 --> 00:25:05,480 Speaker 1: Because that's what it's gonna take. It's not going to 490 00:25:05,600 --> 00:25:09,760 Speaker 1: magically happen like, yes, it's work. But work can be joyful, 491 00:25:10,600 --> 00:25:15,399 Speaker 1: you know, work can be delightful. I delighted in and 492 00:25:15,520 --> 00:25:18,680 Speaker 1: still with the people that I love figuring out ways 493 00:25:18,720 --> 00:25:22,280 Speaker 1: to make them happy. I delight in that, you know. 494 00:25:23,000 --> 00:25:26,399 Speaker 1: Like Girod used to like like leave a note on 495 00:25:26,440 --> 00:25:28,320 Speaker 1: my car, you know, and I'd go, who the hell 496 00:25:28,320 --> 00:25:29,400 Speaker 1: I put a thing on my car, and it would 497 00:25:29,440 --> 00:25:31,520 Speaker 1: just be him like saying, I leve you in, I'm 498 00:25:31,520 --> 00:25:34,639 Speaker 1: stalking you. That was a vapor thing to say, you 499 00:25:34,720 --> 00:25:36,800 Speaker 1: were right, and no'll be like turn around, I'm like, 500 00:25:39,520 --> 00:25:41,280 Speaker 1: you know, And so I just say all that to 501 00:25:41,320 --> 00:25:43,720 Speaker 1: say that, like that is the lesson in the word 502 00:25:43,760 --> 00:25:46,959 Speaker 1: for today, whether it comes to your money, your career, 503 00:25:47,400 --> 00:25:52,480 Speaker 1: your relationships, your business, whatever, your job, whatever, whatever it 504 00:25:52,520 --> 00:25:55,560 Speaker 1: is that you're wanting that you know, you can have 505 00:25:55,640 --> 00:26:00,400 Speaker 1: those things, but it takes effort, consistency because you really 506 00:26:00,440 --> 00:26:05,840 Speaker 1: do get to play the way you practice, okay, And 507 00:26:05,920 --> 00:26:08,679 Speaker 1: so yeah, so I just hope that's a good word 508 00:26:08,880 --> 00:26:12,880 Speaker 1: on today. It's time. Oh damn, I always forget. No, 509 00:26:13,000 --> 00:26:15,080 Speaker 1: that's like the b a q A damn it. How 510 00:26:15,080 --> 00:26:16,800 Speaker 1: does the brown break broke, So I don't know why 511 00:26:16,800 --> 00:26:23,000 Speaker 1: I keep forgetting Are you gonna break? It's I don't 512 00:26:23,040 --> 00:26:25,920 Speaker 1: know why, yo, my memory, you mighty had to step in, 513 00:26:26,400 --> 00:26:30,720 Speaker 1: and now it's time to boost off, break off, boost up, 514 00:26:30,800 --> 00:26:35,679 Speaker 1: break off, boost up? Break Are you gonna Are you 515 00:26:35,720 --> 00:26:39,600 Speaker 1: gonna boost? Mean? While did backwards? What you're gonna do? 516 00:26:39,800 --> 00:26:43,560 Speaker 1: What you're gonna take? You know, I'm in a good moves. 517 00:26:43,600 --> 00:26:45,399 Speaker 1: I don't even know if I want to really break 518 00:26:45,640 --> 00:26:49,440 Speaker 1: like that, although I will say I don't know child 519 00:26:49,920 --> 00:26:51,760 Speaker 1: the I guess if I was gonna break from anything, 520 00:26:51,760 --> 00:26:54,200 Speaker 1: I'm gonna boost because something good is gonna good is coming. 521 00:26:54,200 --> 00:26:57,480 Speaker 1: But if I was gonna break from anything, you know, 522 00:26:57,520 --> 00:26:59,680 Speaker 1: I'm gonna break from. This is like not so much 523 00:26:59,680 --> 00:27:03,680 Speaker 1: finance as it is like just like like LifeWise, But 524 00:27:03,800 --> 00:27:07,080 Speaker 1: why is it like when it what is it me? 525 00:27:07,760 --> 00:27:09,960 Speaker 1: Or it seems like there's this whole men hate women, 526 00:27:10,040 --> 00:27:12,359 Speaker 1: women hate men thing. It's not just in like the 527 00:27:12,359 --> 00:27:15,120 Speaker 1: Black Girls space. I've seen it like all over what's happening. 528 00:27:15,680 --> 00:27:17,239 Speaker 1: I feel like I've been out of the loop. But 529 00:27:17,280 --> 00:27:20,520 Speaker 1: I'm like, you know, the whole Remember Kevin Samuelson, But 530 00:27:20,560 --> 00:27:22,399 Speaker 1: like that was kind of probably at his peak. But 531 00:27:22,600 --> 00:27:25,480 Speaker 1: like all the podcasts and all the I don't remember 532 00:27:25,560 --> 00:27:27,240 Speaker 1: that always being the case, has not always been the 533 00:27:27,240 --> 00:27:30,560 Speaker 1: case women against men anyway. I want to break from 534 00:27:30,560 --> 00:27:34,199 Speaker 1: that because this whole ain't no good men, ain't no 535 00:27:34,240 --> 00:27:38,280 Speaker 1: good women. La la la la yea. Yeah, One that's 536 00:27:38,320 --> 00:27:40,960 Speaker 1: not true. And two why would you want that to 537 00:27:41,000 --> 00:27:43,720 Speaker 1: be true? You have to be so careful about the 538 00:27:43,760 --> 00:27:46,400 Speaker 1: words that come out of your mouth. All men lie, 539 00:27:46,480 --> 00:27:50,280 Speaker 1: all men cheap, that's not true. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, 540 00:27:51,640 --> 00:27:55,280 Speaker 1: you know, or women only want you for whatever. That's 541 00:27:55,320 --> 00:27:57,880 Speaker 1: not true. That's not true because I not only did 542 00:27:57,880 --> 00:28:00,320 Speaker 1: I live it. I can look around my neighbors across 543 00:28:00,359 --> 00:28:02,159 Speaker 1: the street. They're in a loving relationship. Of course, you 544 00:28:02,160 --> 00:28:05,040 Speaker 1: don't know everybody's business. I think about my designer Rihanna 545 00:28:05,040 --> 00:28:07,520 Speaker 1: and her husband Jermaine. They're like amazing. I think about Terrell, 546 00:28:07,640 --> 00:28:11,880 Speaker 1: Jirell's brother. He is an awesome partner to his long 547 00:28:12,000 --> 00:28:17,840 Speaker 1: term girlfriend. I think about Oh, who is Oh? I 548 00:28:17,840 --> 00:28:20,560 Speaker 1: think about like my friend Seanta and Dennis. That's such 549 00:28:20,560 --> 00:28:24,280 Speaker 1: a loving relationship. I think about my friend Sahai and 550 00:28:24,320 --> 00:28:29,600 Speaker 1: her husband. They have such a loving relationship. I mean, certainly, 551 00:28:29,640 --> 00:28:33,240 Speaker 1: of course, there are a lot of examples of unhealthy relationships. 552 00:28:33,480 --> 00:28:37,000 Speaker 1: But I just say all that to say that something 553 00:28:37,080 --> 00:28:39,080 Speaker 1: someone told me wants. It's like, why would you want 554 00:28:39,080 --> 00:28:42,600 Speaker 1: to win a losing game? Meaning like, oh, it is 555 00:28:42,680 --> 00:28:48,240 Speaker 1: true all men are okay, says congratulations, you win, you win, 556 00:28:49,200 --> 00:28:53,560 Speaker 1: you win. Everybody's terrible. Yay, I don't want to win 557 00:28:53,560 --> 00:28:56,240 Speaker 1: that game. Keep that over there, so you get to 558 00:28:56,320 --> 00:28:59,400 Speaker 1: win that. The truth is every man is terrible, and 559 00:28:59,440 --> 00:29:02,080 Speaker 1: then other people get to win that they don't believe it, 560 00:29:02,360 --> 00:29:05,720 Speaker 1: so they have the partnership that they desire. So like, 561 00:29:05,840 --> 00:29:08,960 Speaker 1: why would you want to argue for your own limitations 562 00:29:08,960 --> 00:29:12,240 Speaker 1: and win because you're gonna win every time you are 563 00:29:12,920 --> 00:29:15,160 Speaker 1: and I know I have. It's not like, oh well 564 00:29:15,200 --> 00:29:16,920 Speaker 1: that's so you're so lucky because you got lucky with Jarell. 565 00:29:16,960 --> 00:29:20,240 Speaker 1: You think I have some terrible ass relationships girl, of 566 00:29:20,280 --> 00:29:23,760 Speaker 1: course I did. Forty four, you know, me and Darrel 567 00:29:23,800 --> 00:29:25,440 Speaker 1: didn't get married to I was thirty seven, a child, 568 00:29:25,480 --> 00:29:28,400 Speaker 1: I was in the monck. Okay, I have plenty of 569 00:29:28,880 --> 00:29:32,760 Speaker 1: foolishness when it comes to dating, plenty, you know. And 570 00:29:32,840 --> 00:29:35,960 Speaker 1: yet and still there was a Jirell, you know what 571 00:29:36,000 --> 00:29:37,720 Speaker 1: I mean? And so I just say all that to 572 00:29:37,760 --> 00:29:40,400 Speaker 1: say that, like, that's my brown break, but I'm gonna 573 00:29:40,400 --> 00:29:43,520 Speaker 1: boost But that's my brown break. That like speaking life 574 00:29:43,760 --> 00:29:47,080 Speaker 1: into the life that you want. Stop arguing for your 575 00:29:47,120 --> 00:29:50,400 Speaker 1: own limitations and then being mad when you win because 576 00:29:50,440 --> 00:29:52,520 Speaker 1: you're going to win every time. I don't want to 577 00:29:52,560 --> 00:29:55,959 Speaker 1: win at ain't enough money, I'll never make that, I 578 00:29:56,000 --> 00:29:58,760 Speaker 1: can't have that, I can't live that, I'm always gonna 579 00:29:58,760 --> 00:30:00,680 Speaker 1: be broke that I'm not trying to win that game 580 00:30:00,840 --> 00:30:02,960 Speaker 1: because if you say those things, you're going to win. 581 00:30:03,600 --> 00:30:05,560 Speaker 1: And then you get to win at a losing game 582 00:30:05,960 --> 00:30:08,600 Speaker 1: and we want better for you. Okay, so we dropping 583 00:30:08,680 --> 00:30:11,160 Speaker 1: all that negative tool. That's the brand break. But the 584 00:30:11,200 --> 00:30:14,160 Speaker 1: bruce is your girl's going back to the White House, 585 00:30:14,320 --> 00:30:18,000 Speaker 1: the White House, the White House. Okay, yes, black girl 586 00:30:18,040 --> 00:30:21,000 Speaker 1: in the White House. Hey, black girl in the White House. See, 587 00:30:21,760 --> 00:30:23,440 Speaker 1: maybe that's what the next episode will be called, black 588 00:30:23,440 --> 00:30:26,160 Speaker 1: Girl in the White House. Sell for those of you 589 00:30:26,200 --> 00:30:28,800 Speaker 1: all remember like a set aside your political views, because 590 00:30:28,880 --> 00:30:32,720 Speaker 1: I know, I get it, it's a shit show in general, 591 00:30:33,000 --> 00:30:36,520 Speaker 1: like you know, the whole political system. But last year 592 00:30:36,560 --> 00:30:38,320 Speaker 1: I was invited to the White House for the first 593 00:30:38,320 --> 00:30:42,080 Speaker 1: time to watch the State of the Union and then 594 00:30:42,080 --> 00:30:44,560 Speaker 1: to kind of like share like the financial components of 595 00:30:44,600 --> 00:30:45,880 Speaker 1: the state of the Union that we should all be 596 00:30:45,920 --> 00:30:48,400 Speaker 1: focused on. And so, you know, at first they put 597 00:30:48,440 --> 00:30:49,880 Speaker 1: you like in this pressroom, and I just thought, oh, 598 00:30:49,920 --> 00:30:52,120 Speaker 1: we're going to be in this press room. I was excited. 599 00:30:52,560 --> 00:30:55,080 Speaker 1: And then we actually went into the actual White House itself. 600 00:30:55,120 --> 00:30:58,560 Speaker 1: I said, not me met the first lady just happen 601 00:30:58,600 --> 00:31:01,800 Speaker 1: to be walking about like, oh hey, girls, ay, miss I 602 00:31:01,840 --> 00:31:04,920 Speaker 1: shook her hand or whatever, because you know, and then 603 00:31:05,240 --> 00:31:08,320 Speaker 1: they were like, we literally I have a picture of me. Yo. 604 00:31:08,400 --> 00:31:11,720 Speaker 1: It's crazy on like the front porch of the White House, 605 00:31:11,760 --> 00:31:13,440 Speaker 1: you know, like well, not the front porch that we 606 00:31:13,440 --> 00:31:14,800 Speaker 1: were on, the front porch too, but you know that 607 00:31:14,920 --> 00:31:17,680 Speaker 1: like the circular veranda thing that's on the second level. 608 00:31:17,680 --> 00:31:19,440 Speaker 1: I got a picture of me. Just lean, I gotta 609 00:31:19,480 --> 00:31:22,520 Speaker 1: post that picture again so I can gag the girls. 610 00:31:24,040 --> 00:31:25,800 Speaker 1: And it was just so surreal black girl in the 611 00:31:25,840 --> 00:31:30,840 Speaker 1: White House. Yeah, it was just really surreal. And so 612 00:31:31,000 --> 00:31:33,160 Speaker 1: and actually the President pulled up. I didn't, you know, 613 00:31:33,360 --> 00:31:35,360 Speaker 1: I thought we were just gonna see him like from Afar. No, 614 00:31:35,480 --> 00:31:38,040 Speaker 1: he came up shaking hands. You know. I was like, 615 00:31:38,160 --> 00:31:41,840 Speaker 1: wait a minute. So, no matter your political leanings, you know, 616 00:31:41,840 --> 00:31:46,120 Speaker 1: we're gonna set that aside, and it is I used 617 00:31:46,120 --> 00:31:49,520 Speaker 1: to teach preschool in Newark, New Jersey, and your girl 618 00:31:49,560 --> 00:31:52,280 Speaker 1: is going back to the White House and will potentially, 619 00:31:53,080 --> 00:31:55,120 Speaker 1: you know, meet the President again, the first lady, even 620 00:31:55,120 --> 00:31:59,480 Speaker 1: the Vice President whoever, you know, like in the actual 621 00:31:59,480 --> 00:32:01,320 Speaker 1: White House I'm talking about, like you know, not a 622 00:32:01,400 --> 00:32:03,880 Speaker 1: Jason House. Like literally I was on that veranda. We 623 00:32:03,880 --> 00:32:07,040 Speaker 1: were able to take pictures. It was surreal. And so 624 00:32:08,040 --> 00:32:11,920 Speaker 1: it just is a testament to where your works can 625 00:32:11,960 --> 00:32:14,720 Speaker 1: take you. That's why I said, with the black, the 626 00:32:14,720 --> 00:32:18,080 Speaker 1: brown boost, the brown break is being mindful of the 627 00:32:18,120 --> 00:32:22,719 Speaker 1: words that you say, because either way they're true. And 628 00:32:22,840 --> 00:32:27,400 Speaker 1: I don't want to adhere to limiting beliefs about my ability, 629 00:32:27,600 --> 00:32:34,440 Speaker 1: my business, my money, relationships, love friendships, you know, my 630 00:32:34,800 --> 00:32:38,280 Speaker 1: my familial relationships. I don't want to adhere to any 631 00:32:38,440 --> 00:32:42,640 Speaker 1: limiting beliefs about those things because those things become true. 632 00:32:42,960 --> 00:32:47,240 Speaker 1: Because there's no reason why this girl, you know, preschool 633 00:32:47,240 --> 00:32:51,040 Speaker 1: teacher Tiffany, you know, should be invited back to the 634 00:32:51,080 --> 00:32:54,680 Speaker 1: White House again, you know what I mean. And it's 635 00:32:54,680 --> 00:32:58,840 Speaker 1: because I, you know, I try my best to show 636 00:32:58,920 --> 00:33:02,000 Speaker 1: up fully with all that I believe that I'm deserving 637 00:33:02,040 --> 00:33:04,880 Speaker 1: and even still I still struggle with what does that 638 00:33:04,920 --> 00:33:07,560 Speaker 1: actually mean because I still have some limiting beliefs that 639 00:33:07,600 --> 00:33:11,000 Speaker 1: I tried my best to work through with therapy and 640 00:33:11,120 --> 00:33:13,840 Speaker 1: just like you know, self work, and so I just 641 00:33:13,840 --> 00:33:15,520 Speaker 1: share all that to say it that like, yeah, my 642 00:33:15,600 --> 00:33:18,120 Speaker 1: boost is like I'm going back to the White House invited, 643 00:33:18,880 --> 00:33:23,800 Speaker 1: Like here is your invitation here. You know, the State 644 00:33:23,840 --> 00:33:27,000 Speaker 1: of the Union is actually on Thursday, So you know, 645 00:33:27,200 --> 00:33:29,600 Speaker 1: follow me on social because I'm gonna I like to 646 00:33:29,600 --> 00:33:31,120 Speaker 1: do like a series of stories so you can kind 647 00:33:31,160 --> 00:33:33,000 Speaker 1: of follow them along with me, go into the White 648 00:33:33,000 --> 00:33:35,120 Speaker 1: House and all that I have to do to get ready, 649 00:33:35,880 --> 00:33:37,920 Speaker 1: and then of course afterwards, I want to share like 650 00:33:38,320 --> 00:33:40,480 Speaker 1: what I heard at the State of the Union and 651 00:33:40,520 --> 00:33:44,120 Speaker 1: what components at least the financial and the jobs and 652 00:33:44,160 --> 00:33:47,560 Speaker 1: the careers and even small business stuff that we should 653 00:33:47,560 --> 00:33:49,960 Speaker 1: be looking forward to for the rest of this year. 654 00:33:50,240 --> 00:33:52,480 Speaker 1: You know that we're addressed in the State of the Union, 655 00:33:52,600 --> 00:33:55,240 Speaker 1: so in the State of Union address. So yeah, I 656 00:33:55,320 --> 00:33:56,840 Speaker 1: just want to leave you with all that, you know, 657 00:33:56,920 --> 00:34:00,520 Speaker 1: a little positivity. Black girl in the White House, black 658 00:34:00,560 --> 00:34:04,040 Speaker 1: girl in the White House, black girl, black girl, black 659 00:34:04,120 --> 00:34:06,640 Speaker 1: girl in the White House. You know, I'm the mess. 660 00:34:07,040 --> 00:34:10,640 Speaker 1: Don't tell me, Mandie. I was in here cutting up. Yeah, 661 00:34:10,680 --> 00:34:12,680 Speaker 1: so you don't follow along, I'll be posting of the 662 00:34:12,719 --> 00:34:18,600 Speaker 1: bunch ofista ig mostly So all right, that's the show 663 00:34:18,760 --> 00:34:22,840 Speaker 1: for today. I hope we gave you a little booze, honey. Yeah. 664 00:34:22,920 --> 00:34:24,560 Speaker 1: I want for you what I want for myself, which 665 00:34:24,600 --> 00:34:28,479 Speaker 1: is the best. Okay, all right, until Friday, we're gonna 666 00:34:28,480 --> 00:34:30,880 Speaker 1: do b a qap up. Questions slide into our I 667 00:34:30,960 --> 00:34:34,280 Speaker 1: g d MS the Brown Ambision Podcast, Brown Ambition Podcast. 668 00:34:34,560 --> 00:34:37,200 Speaker 1: We'll answer as many questions as possible. I'll see you 669 00:34:37,239 --> 00:34:38,440 Speaker 1: on Friday. Bye.