1 00:00:00,080 --> 00:00:01,320 Speaker 1: I need you to hear this truth. 2 00:00:01,400 --> 00:00:04,120 Speaker 2: Okay, I really need you to hear this and actually 3 00:00:04,320 --> 00:00:06,760 Speaker 2: believe it. And if when I'm saying it to you 4 00:00:06,760 --> 00:00:08,959 Speaker 2: you do not believe it to your core, I'm going 5 00:00:09,000 --> 00:00:11,240 Speaker 2: to need you to say it to yourself every single 6 00:00:11,320 --> 00:00:12,160 Speaker 2: day until you do. 7 00:00:12,480 --> 00:00:13,480 Speaker 1: The truth is that. 8 00:00:13,480 --> 00:00:16,919 Speaker 2: Your value or worth has absolutely nothing to do with 9 00:00:17,000 --> 00:00:19,639 Speaker 2: how you look or how young you are. I'm Raley 10 00:00:19,800 --> 00:00:22,560 Speaker 2: Wukiah and on my podcast A Really Good Cry, we 11 00:00:22,640 --> 00:00:26,640 Speaker 2: embrace the messy and the beautiful, providing a space for raw, 12 00:00:26,720 --> 00:00:30,880 Speaker 2: unfiltered conversations that celebrate vulnerability and allow you to tune 13 00:00:30,920 --> 00:00:35,280 Speaker 2: in to learn, connect and find comfort together. Today, I 14 00:00:35,320 --> 00:00:37,239 Speaker 2: wanted to talk to you about something that I've been 15 00:00:37,280 --> 00:00:39,720 Speaker 2: experiencing as the years have gone on. You know, I 16 00:00:39,800 --> 00:00:42,240 Speaker 2: hit my thirties a good few years ago. I'm currently 17 00:00:42,280 --> 00:00:46,800 Speaker 2: thirty four, and I find myself doing this thing where 18 00:00:46,880 --> 00:00:49,120 Speaker 2: I'm looking back at pictures of myself from even a 19 00:00:49,159 --> 00:00:52,240 Speaker 2: year ago, maybe miss six months ago, five years ago, 20 00:00:52,479 --> 00:00:56,360 Speaker 2: and zooming in and analyzing all the little differences between 21 00:00:57,000 --> 00:01:00,360 Speaker 2: the me then and the me now. And I don't 22 00:01:00,360 --> 00:01:02,440 Speaker 2: know whether you guys can relate to that, but it 23 00:01:02,560 --> 00:01:06,240 Speaker 2: is such a difficult pattern to get out of When 24 00:01:06,280 --> 00:01:09,039 Speaker 2: you become used to doing that, it's like a picture 25 00:01:09,080 --> 00:01:10,959 Speaker 2: of you pops up, but instead of looking at it 26 00:01:11,000 --> 00:01:13,840 Speaker 2: back as a wonderful memory, which it could be, you 27 00:01:13,959 --> 00:01:16,200 Speaker 2: end up looking at it as I was so much 28 00:01:16,200 --> 00:01:17,119 Speaker 2: more beautiful than. 29 00:01:17,360 --> 00:01:19,720 Speaker 1: Than I am right now. And your mind can really spiral. 30 00:01:20,160 --> 00:01:23,440 Speaker 2: I actually found myself afterwards just feeling a bit disappointed 31 00:01:23,480 --> 00:01:25,959 Speaker 2: and annoyed at myself, but thinking that way because I 32 00:01:26,000 --> 00:01:29,200 Speaker 2: feel like I've worked so hard on myself to be 33 00:01:29,760 --> 00:01:33,080 Speaker 2: more accepting of so much of my body and spend 34 00:01:33,120 --> 00:01:35,840 Speaker 2: a lot of my time focusing on growth, and then 35 00:01:35,840 --> 00:01:38,440 Speaker 2: in these little micro moments, I notice myself going back 36 00:01:38,480 --> 00:01:42,680 Speaker 2: into this well wind and pattern of negative self talk 37 00:01:42,800 --> 00:01:47,640 Speaker 2: and comparison and putting myself down. And honestly, it's getting 38 00:01:47,640 --> 00:01:49,640 Speaker 2: a little bit disappointing now. And I really want to 39 00:01:49,640 --> 00:01:52,520 Speaker 2: make a shift in my mindset, because the truth is, 40 00:01:53,400 --> 00:01:55,160 Speaker 2: and maybe in my thirties now, but do I want 41 00:01:55,160 --> 00:01:57,960 Speaker 2: to spend the rest of our sixty years that possibly 42 00:01:57,960 --> 00:02:01,040 Speaker 2: are ahead of me with the same mind set constantly 43 00:02:01,400 --> 00:02:03,880 Speaker 2: thinking about how much better I looked back in the day. 44 00:02:04,280 --> 00:02:05,760 Speaker 2: And I don't want to be part of the problem 45 00:02:05,840 --> 00:02:08,320 Speaker 2: if I think that myself. How can I be encouraging 46 00:02:08,320 --> 00:02:11,760 Speaker 2: women to embrace themselves and actually love themselves when I 47 00:02:11,800 --> 00:02:14,160 Speaker 2: am judging myself in that way on a daily basis, 48 00:02:14,200 --> 00:02:16,239 Speaker 2: And so I really want to make a shift. So 49 00:02:16,280 --> 00:02:18,760 Speaker 2: I've really been working on it lately, and I thought 50 00:02:18,800 --> 00:02:21,240 Speaker 2: it could be something that many of us have struggled with. 51 00:02:21,360 --> 00:02:23,640 Speaker 2: So I wanted to share my experience and my thought 52 00:02:23,680 --> 00:02:26,440 Speaker 2: process that I've gone through to really help embrace this 53 00:02:26,560 --> 00:02:30,160 Speaker 2: beautiful thing that is aging. And you know, it's so 54 00:02:30,240 --> 00:02:32,160 Speaker 2: interesting because when I talk about this with people who 55 00:02:32,160 --> 00:02:34,080 Speaker 2: are older than me, they're like, oh. 56 00:02:33,919 --> 00:02:35,120 Speaker 1: My goodness, you're so young. 57 00:02:35,280 --> 00:02:37,359 Speaker 2: And when I talk about this to people who are younger, 58 00:02:37,720 --> 00:02:40,240 Speaker 2: some of them just can't relate. And so I think 59 00:02:40,280 --> 00:02:42,440 Speaker 2: there's this shift that you go through if you're in 60 00:02:42,440 --> 00:02:45,000 Speaker 2: your thirties and maybe in your forties, where you start 61 00:02:45,000 --> 00:02:47,040 Speaker 2: to notice these things. But I think it has the 62 00:02:47,080 --> 00:02:50,240 Speaker 2: potential to go on for years and years if we 63 00:02:50,320 --> 00:02:53,880 Speaker 2: don't start addressing it and finding ways to really overcome 64 00:02:53,919 --> 00:02:56,120 Speaker 2: those thoughts and become better in the way that we 65 00:02:56,160 --> 00:02:59,119 Speaker 2: speak to ourselves. I also believe that the only time 66 00:02:59,120 --> 00:03:01,960 Speaker 2: people can really and make change from the words that 67 00:03:02,040 --> 00:03:05,040 Speaker 2: you say is when you're really living it yourself. And 68 00:03:05,080 --> 00:03:08,040 Speaker 2: I remember, there's this definition that my teacher, rather than 69 00:03:08,080 --> 00:03:10,760 Speaker 2: Asswami once gave and it stuck with me ever since, 70 00:03:10,800 --> 00:03:12,880 Speaker 2: and I feel like it is my constant goal and 71 00:03:12,919 --> 00:03:13,960 Speaker 2: my constant. 72 00:03:13,520 --> 00:03:14,960 Speaker 1: Aspiration to be this way. 73 00:03:15,440 --> 00:03:18,360 Speaker 2: He said that people will only feel your words to 74 00:03:18,400 --> 00:03:20,760 Speaker 2: their heart and want to make a shift in their 75 00:03:20,800 --> 00:03:22,960 Speaker 2: life from the things that you say when you live 76 00:03:23,000 --> 00:03:26,600 Speaker 2: with true integrity. And true integrity is when our words, 77 00:03:26,680 --> 00:03:28,560 Speaker 2: our actions, and our thoughts are. 78 00:03:28,480 --> 00:03:29,320 Speaker 1: All in alignment. 79 00:03:29,919 --> 00:03:32,080 Speaker 2: And every time I think about that, you know, it 80 00:03:32,080 --> 00:03:33,920 Speaker 2: brings me back to the idea of how can I 81 00:03:34,000 --> 00:03:36,840 Speaker 2: be saying all these things and empowering women and trying 82 00:03:36,840 --> 00:03:40,000 Speaker 2: to help people accept themselves if I don't do that myself. 83 00:03:40,280 --> 00:03:42,240 Speaker 2: You know, people say living in LA makes it worse, 84 00:03:42,320 --> 00:03:44,680 Speaker 2: but I'm honestly not sure. You know, every time I 85 00:03:44,720 --> 00:03:46,360 Speaker 2: tell people that I live in LA or I go 86 00:03:46,440 --> 00:03:49,000 Speaker 2: back home to my friends, they have this perception of 87 00:03:49,040 --> 00:03:52,400 Speaker 2: what LA is like. You know, it's so material, it's 88 00:03:52,640 --> 00:03:55,160 Speaker 2: you know, everyone's got plastic surgery and everyone's done this 89 00:03:55,200 --> 00:03:57,040 Speaker 2: to their body and this to their body. But I 90 00:03:57,080 --> 00:03:59,960 Speaker 2: honestly think innately, this fear of aging is not link 91 00:04:00,080 --> 00:04:03,520 Speaker 2: to a specific place I think it's actually in every 92 00:04:03,520 --> 00:04:05,480 Speaker 2: single one of us, no matter what town you live in, 93 00:04:05,520 --> 00:04:07,840 Speaker 2: no matter what city you're in, no matter whether people 94 00:04:07,840 --> 00:04:10,040 Speaker 2: are doing a lot more plastic surgery around you or not, 95 00:04:10,400 --> 00:04:14,400 Speaker 2: there's this fear of aging. Because I actually think that innately, 96 00:04:14,440 --> 00:04:16,960 Speaker 2: this fear of aging is linked to knowing as each 97 00:04:17,040 --> 00:04:19,359 Speaker 2: year goes on, it brings us closer and closer to 98 00:04:19,400 --> 00:04:21,760 Speaker 2: the one thing that we do not want to think about, 99 00:04:21,880 --> 00:04:23,839 Speaker 2: and that's death. And I think that this deep rooted 100 00:04:23,880 --> 00:04:26,159 Speaker 2: fear comes from that. It's us trying to avoid thinking 101 00:04:26,200 --> 00:04:29,680 Speaker 2: about it, and inevitably, it is kind of true, the 102 00:04:29,680 --> 00:04:31,640 Speaker 2: more we age, the closer we get to death. But 103 00:04:31,680 --> 00:04:33,800 Speaker 2: why does that have to feel like such a daunting, 104 00:04:33,920 --> 00:04:37,240 Speaker 2: scary thing? And so I think something that's really helped 105 00:04:37,279 --> 00:04:41,240 Speaker 2: me as I've read and deeper my spiritual practice in 106 00:04:41,240 --> 00:04:43,640 Speaker 2: The Vaders. It says that there are three things that 107 00:04:43,680 --> 00:04:47,360 Speaker 2: are certain in life birth, death and old, age and disease. 108 00:04:47,839 --> 00:04:49,560 Speaker 2: And so when you come to terms with the fact 109 00:04:49,560 --> 00:04:52,000 Speaker 2: that those three things are always going to be part 110 00:04:52,040 --> 00:04:54,560 Speaker 2: of life, like that is just a given in some 111 00:04:54,760 --> 00:04:57,359 Speaker 2: shape or form that's going to enter our life, you 112 00:04:57,440 --> 00:04:59,159 Speaker 2: start to come to terms with it and you start 113 00:04:59,200 --> 00:05:01,120 Speaker 2: to create a narrati in your mind that is not, 114 00:05:01,480 --> 00:05:03,279 Speaker 2: oh my gosh, I can't have this in my life. 115 00:05:03,320 --> 00:05:06,080 Speaker 2: And if I feel my body changing and my things 116 00:05:06,080 --> 00:05:08,240 Speaker 2: starting to ache, that this isn't part of the plan. 117 00:05:08,600 --> 00:05:10,320 Speaker 2: But if you realize it is part of the plan, 118 00:05:10,480 --> 00:05:13,280 Speaker 2: there's a slight solace that comes with that. So really 119 00:05:13,320 --> 00:05:17,520 Speaker 2: starting to acknowledge and understand where this deep booted fear 120 00:05:17,560 --> 00:05:20,440 Speaker 2: comes from, which is aging, which leads to death, and 121 00:05:20,480 --> 00:05:22,680 Speaker 2: then starting to understand it, like we always fear things 122 00:05:22,720 --> 00:05:25,159 Speaker 2: that we don't know, and so if you also start 123 00:05:25,160 --> 00:05:29,640 Speaker 2: to understand and learn from people and hearing about their experiences, 124 00:05:29,920 --> 00:05:33,320 Speaker 2: it can really lessen our fear around something because we 125 00:05:33,400 --> 00:05:35,599 Speaker 2: start to understand it and it doesn't become such a 126 00:05:35,640 --> 00:05:38,200 Speaker 2: foreign thing to us. So if you're expecting a really 127 00:05:38,200 --> 00:05:41,800 Speaker 2: sweet episode comforting you, unfortunately it's not going to be 128 00:05:41,839 --> 00:05:44,920 Speaker 2: that episode because the fact is we are aging every 129 00:05:44,920 --> 00:05:47,839 Speaker 2: minute every day. I know it's not always glamorous, the 130 00:05:47,960 --> 00:05:50,839 Speaker 2: changes in your face, maybe the little wrinkles around your eyes, 131 00:05:50,880 --> 00:05:55,239 Speaker 2: the gray hairs, your bones cracking, but avoiding it actually 132 00:05:55,279 --> 00:05:57,400 Speaker 2: just adds to your anxiety of it and fearing it 133 00:05:57,440 --> 00:06:00,440 Speaker 2: your whole life. Honestly sounds like a nightmare that I 134 00:06:00,760 --> 00:06:03,640 Speaker 2: do not want to spend my precious life living. 135 00:06:04,200 --> 00:06:05,360 Speaker 1: So where does that leave us? 136 00:06:05,600 --> 00:06:08,799 Speaker 2: Well, firstly, knowing that every single person experiences it means 137 00:06:08,800 --> 00:06:10,720 Speaker 2: that we are all going through the same thing together 138 00:06:11,480 --> 00:06:14,560 Speaker 2: and that it is supposed to happen this way. And 139 00:06:14,600 --> 00:06:17,080 Speaker 2: in my spiritual practice, it says that the aging body 140 00:06:17,120 --> 00:06:19,560 Speaker 2: is here to teach us detachment. If we didn't see 141 00:06:19,560 --> 00:06:22,200 Speaker 2: our body age, we may not realize how valuable time 142 00:06:22,320 --> 00:06:24,679 Speaker 2: really is. And if we didn't see the body weaken 143 00:06:24,839 --> 00:06:27,400 Speaker 2: or change in some way, we wouldn't remember just how 144 00:06:27,440 --> 00:06:30,200 Speaker 2: temporary this body is and have a reason to tune 145 00:06:30,240 --> 00:06:33,400 Speaker 2: into our heart or our soul, that urgency that we 146 00:06:33,440 --> 00:06:36,040 Speaker 2: feel to connect deeper to our friends, to our family, 147 00:06:36,400 --> 00:06:40,960 Speaker 2: our partners, the intensity that we feel to deepen our 148 00:06:40,960 --> 00:06:44,119 Speaker 2: spiritual practices and our connection with God. If we didn't 149 00:06:44,160 --> 00:06:46,800 Speaker 2: see ourselves age, would we really have that urgency to 150 00:06:46,880 --> 00:06:49,480 Speaker 2: do any of those things? You know? It's so interesting 151 00:06:49,520 --> 00:06:52,800 Speaker 2: because we're constantly told that time is arguably the most 152 00:06:52,880 --> 00:06:56,599 Speaker 2: valuable resource that we have, but for some reason in society, 153 00:06:57,000 --> 00:07:00,080 Speaker 2: we're also told that the more we accumulate time, the 154 00:07:00,160 --> 00:07:03,160 Speaker 2: less valuable we are. Getting older is years and years 155 00:07:03,160 --> 00:07:05,560 Speaker 2: of building on the wisdom that we learn the experiences 156 00:07:05,600 --> 00:07:08,520 Speaker 2: that we have. But for some reason, we start getting 157 00:07:08,560 --> 00:07:10,680 Speaker 2: scared of it just by seeing the lines that start 158 00:07:10,680 --> 00:07:13,000 Speaker 2: appearing on our face or the changes that we see 159 00:07:13,000 --> 00:07:16,120 Speaker 2: in our body, instead of appreciating all the things that 160 00:07:16,160 --> 00:07:19,560 Speaker 2: we have gained from those years. And so I need 161 00:07:19,600 --> 00:07:21,800 Speaker 2: you to hear this truth. Okay, I really need you 162 00:07:21,880 --> 00:07:25,200 Speaker 2: to hear this and actually believe it. And if when 163 00:07:25,240 --> 00:07:27,040 Speaker 2: I'm saying it to you you do not believe it 164 00:07:27,080 --> 00:07:28,960 Speaker 2: to your core, I'm going to need you to say 165 00:07:28,960 --> 00:07:32,440 Speaker 2: it to yourself every single day until you do. Actually, 166 00:07:32,480 --> 00:07:34,880 Speaker 2: you should be saying this every single hour, every single 167 00:07:34,920 --> 00:07:38,240 Speaker 2: day until you do believe it, because if you say 168 00:07:38,280 --> 00:07:40,960 Speaker 2: something enough, you will end up believing it eventually. And 169 00:07:41,040 --> 00:07:45,280 Speaker 2: so this is something you need to start saying. The 170 00:07:45,320 --> 00:07:48,080 Speaker 2: truth is that your value or worth has nothing to 171 00:07:48,120 --> 00:07:49,920 Speaker 2: do with how you look or how young you are. 172 00:07:50,280 --> 00:07:52,720 Speaker 2: Your value may change shift or look different at different 173 00:07:52,720 --> 00:07:55,880 Speaker 2: stages of life, but each is just as valuable, if 174 00:07:55,920 --> 00:07:58,960 Speaker 2: not more valuable, as time goes on. Also, I don't 175 00:07:58,960 --> 00:08:01,640 Speaker 2: know about you, but if we're in our thirties starting 176 00:08:01,680 --> 00:08:05,119 Speaker 2: to fit aging, that's a possible sixty years more living 177 00:08:05,120 --> 00:08:08,360 Speaker 2: in this fear and anxiety, and I refuse to spend 178 00:08:08,400 --> 00:08:10,880 Speaker 2: those years living through fear. I'm just not doing it. 179 00:08:11,240 --> 00:08:13,440 Speaker 2: A big part of this is acceptance and finding the 180 00:08:13,480 --> 00:08:17,560 Speaker 2: positive thought patterns where the negative ones once lived. So 181 00:08:17,640 --> 00:08:19,680 Speaker 2: if you look in the mirror and just see your 182 00:08:19,680 --> 00:08:23,360 Speaker 2: new rink calls and think oh damn, instead of thinking damn, 183 00:08:23,480 --> 00:08:25,960 Speaker 2: I must have been smiling so hard in life to 184 00:08:26,000 --> 00:08:29,400 Speaker 2: get these bad boys, or thinking I was. 185 00:08:29,400 --> 00:08:31,600 Speaker 1: Beautiful then, but I'm also beautiful now. 186 00:08:32,080 --> 00:08:32,280 Speaker 2: You know. 187 00:08:32,360 --> 00:08:34,280 Speaker 1: The thing is every single wrinkle or line on our 188 00:08:34,280 --> 00:08:36,360 Speaker 1: face is actually caused by expression. 189 00:08:36,760 --> 00:08:39,240 Speaker 2: You can call them expression lines instead to at least 190 00:08:39,320 --> 00:08:41,720 Speaker 2: change that thought, like, instead of a rink calese, start 191 00:08:41,760 --> 00:08:44,920 Speaker 2: calling them expression lines. So wouldn't it be so sad 192 00:08:45,040 --> 00:08:48,040 Speaker 2: if you had lived your whole life without expression? Like, 193 00:08:48,160 --> 00:08:50,080 Speaker 2: what would the meaning of life even be? What would 194 00:08:50,080 --> 00:08:53,280 Speaker 2: life have been without expression without the crying and the 195 00:08:53,360 --> 00:08:56,440 Speaker 2: laughter and the anger and all those emotions that created 196 00:08:56,440 --> 00:08:58,160 Speaker 2: the experiences that formed. 197 00:08:57,920 --> 00:08:58,560 Speaker 1: Who you are? 198 00:08:58,640 --> 00:09:03,880 Speaker 2: Now, how boring would life have been. It's literally like botox. 199 00:09:04,160 --> 00:09:07,160 Speaker 2: Botox freezes your face so it doesn't move intensely during 200 00:09:07,200 --> 00:09:09,880 Speaker 2: moments of expression. So when someone has a little bit 201 00:09:09,920 --> 00:09:12,480 Speaker 2: too much botox, you don't really know whether they're sad, mad, 202 00:09:12,559 --> 00:09:14,880 Speaker 2: or happy. So when you look in the mirror and 203 00:09:14,920 --> 00:09:17,880 Speaker 2: you see those expression lines and you are rejecting them, 204 00:09:18,080 --> 00:09:20,720 Speaker 2: you're essentially saying that you want a botox your whole 205 00:09:20,840 --> 00:09:24,040 Speaker 2: entire life. You want to erase all the experiences the 206 00:09:24,080 --> 00:09:26,680 Speaker 2: expression that you have had. But no, life is so 207 00:09:26,760 --> 00:09:29,880 Speaker 2: dynamic and so are our emotions. The lines on our 208 00:09:29,920 --> 00:09:33,040 Speaker 2: face are just a beautiful depiction of that. I also think, 209 00:09:33,080 --> 00:09:36,320 Speaker 2: of course there is acceptance, but there's also focusing on 210 00:09:36,400 --> 00:09:39,280 Speaker 2: the positive habits too. That is what's honestly been a 211 00:09:39,280 --> 00:09:41,439 Speaker 2: game changer for me. And so what I mean by that, 212 00:09:41,520 --> 00:09:44,880 Speaker 2: it's not the positive thoughts, it's positive action. So I 213 00:09:44,960 --> 00:09:47,600 Speaker 2: know I want to be the strongest, healthiest version of 214 00:09:47,640 --> 00:09:50,280 Speaker 2: myself every year. And for many people, they think, oh, 215 00:09:50,320 --> 00:09:52,120 Speaker 2: as I get older, I'm going to get weaker and 216 00:09:52,160 --> 00:09:53,960 Speaker 2: I'm going to age, and you have this view of 217 00:09:53,960 --> 00:09:57,319 Speaker 2: what aging looks like. But no, for me, I'm stronger 218 00:09:57,320 --> 00:09:59,400 Speaker 2: in my thirties than I was in my twenties. I 219 00:09:59,400 --> 00:10:01,199 Speaker 2: can do a pull now, which I never could do 220 00:10:01,240 --> 00:10:04,000 Speaker 2: when I was in my twenties. I'm healthier and fitter, 221 00:10:04,160 --> 00:10:06,280 Speaker 2: and I have learnt the things that work for my 222 00:10:06,320 --> 00:10:08,079 Speaker 2: body and don't work for my body. I've learned the 223 00:10:08,120 --> 00:10:10,560 Speaker 2: things that make my body thrive, that make me feel 224 00:10:10,559 --> 00:10:13,480 Speaker 2: nourished and healthy and well. I have more energy than 225 00:10:13,480 --> 00:10:15,800 Speaker 2: I had in my twenties. I feel far more vibrant 226 00:10:15,840 --> 00:10:17,480 Speaker 2: than I did in my twenties, and I feel more 227 00:10:17,480 --> 00:10:20,199 Speaker 2: comfortable in my skin than I did. Then, doing all 228 00:10:20,240 --> 00:10:22,440 Speaker 2: the things that you need to do to become and 229 00:10:22,480 --> 00:10:25,520 Speaker 2: embrace the most vibrant, healthy version of yourself is taking 230 00:10:25,600 --> 00:10:29,319 Speaker 2: action in this anxiety. The more you focus on the 231 00:10:29,360 --> 00:10:31,760 Speaker 2: things that make you actually feel good in your body 232 00:10:31,800 --> 00:10:34,520 Speaker 2: and in your mind, the healthier that you'll feel, and 233 00:10:34,559 --> 00:10:37,480 Speaker 2: the less you will fixate on the rest. Simply working 234 00:10:37,520 --> 00:10:39,600 Speaker 2: out and eating the right things can just help support 235 00:10:39,600 --> 00:10:42,760 Speaker 2: our natural collagen production and keeping us looking glowy and 236 00:10:42,800 --> 00:10:45,280 Speaker 2: healthy and vibrant. Really and truly, it's thinking one of 237 00:10:45,320 --> 00:10:46,920 Speaker 2: the things that are going to make me feel the 238 00:10:46,960 --> 00:10:50,280 Speaker 2: best version of myself and starting to incorporate them every day. 239 00:10:50,520 --> 00:10:51,120 Speaker 1: I always think. 240 00:10:51,000 --> 00:10:52,760 Speaker 2: About it like this. I'm like, do I want my 241 00:10:52,800 --> 00:10:54,560 Speaker 2: skin to look perfect? Or do I want to be 242 00:10:54,559 --> 00:10:56,400 Speaker 2: able to pick up my own bags when I'm older? 243 00:10:56,520 --> 00:10:59,160 Speaker 2: Do I want to be able to swim when I'm 244 00:10:59,240 --> 00:11:01,480 Speaker 2: ninety years old, like my grandma was, Do I want 245 00:11:01,520 --> 00:11:04,240 Speaker 2: to be able to go meet my friends for a 246 00:11:04,280 --> 00:11:06,360 Speaker 2: coffee at the age of eighty and you'll have to 247 00:11:06,400 --> 00:11:07,960 Speaker 2: worry about getting in and out of a car with 248 00:11:08,040 --> 00:11:10,680 Speaker 2: my back aching? Like do I want to be self 249 00:11:10,679 --> 00:11:14,000 Speaker 2: sufficient when I'm in my sixties, seventies, eighteenes, nineties? I'm 250 00:11:14,000 --> 00:11:16,679 Speaker 2: be able to do everything for myself? And what do 251 00:11:16,760 --> 00:11:18,640 Speaker 2: I have to do now to create that life for 252 00:11:18,720 --> 00:11:22,880 Speaker 2: myself later? My grandma is ninety years old, and she 253 00:11:23,200 --> 00:11:26,320 Speaker 2: is the most beautiful vision of what being in your 254 00:11:26,400 --> 00:11:28,720 Speaker 2: nineties looks like. And if I think about what her 255 00:11:28,760 --> 00:11:30,760 Speaker 2: life has involved, it's involved so much. 256 00:11:30,800 --> 00:11:32,760 Speaker 1: But some of the key things I've taken from it 257 00:11:33,280 --> 00:11:33,959 Speaker 1: are a. 258 00:11:34,000 --> 00:11:37,120 Speaker 2: Deep spiritual practice understanding that I am not this body, 259 00:11:37,160 --> 00:11:39,600 Speaker 2: I am the soul, and how can I create the richest, 260 00:11:39,800 --> 00:11:44,000 Speaker 2: most magnificent connection with God and my spirit. She also 261 00:11:44,240 --> 00:11:46,360 Speaker 2: doesn't just neglect her body when she's focusing on her 262 00:11:46,360 --> 00:11:50,040 Speaker 2: spiritual practices. She eats right, She fasts regularly. You know, 263 00:11:50,120 --> 00:11:52,520 Speaker 2: intimate and fastic has come out now, but fast thing 264 00:11:52,559 --> 00:11:55,440 Speaker 2: has been part of our culture and tradition and spiritual 265 00:11:55,480 --> 00:11:59,240 Speaker 2: practices for thousands and thousands of years. And my grandma 266 00:11:59,360 --> 00:12:02,079 Speaker 2: has many days of the week where she actually fasts. 267 00:12:02,120 --> 00:12:04,920 Speaker 2: She fasts from grains. She'll do full days of fasts, 268 00:12:05,400 --> 00:12:08,040 Speaker 2: and so she knows the things that physically also work 269 00:12:08,080 --> 00:12:10,440 Speaker 2: for her body. She may be doing them for spiritual reasons, 270 00:12:10,600 --> 00:12:13,240 Speaker 2: but I really think they've contributed towards her physical health too. 271 00:12:13,800 --> 00:12:16,280 Speaker 2: She walks every single day, she used to go swimming. 272 00:12:16,280 --> 00:12:19,319 Speaker 2: She has a social life. She has a little club, 273 00:12:19,400 --> 00:12:21,600 Speaker 2: not a club, not like a woo oooh club, but 274 00:12:21,760 --> 00:12:23,679 Speaker 2: like a social club that her and her friends go 275 00:12:23,760 --> 00:12:26,200 Speaker 2: to and they just think spiritual prayers together, and they 276 00:12:26,280 --> 00:12:29,120 Speaker 2: hang out and they eat together, and so all these things, 277 00:12:29,240 --> 00:12:33,760 Speaker 2: you know, connection with people eating well, my grandma is 278 00:12:33,840 --> 00:12:37,080 Speaker 2: so regulated in the way that she eats, whether it's 279 00:12:37,080 --> 00:12:39,440 Speaker 2: with the times or whether it's the types of foods 280 00:12:39,440 --> 00:12:42,400 Speaker 2: that she has on her plates every single night. So 281 00:12:42,640 --> 00:12:45,040 Speaker 2: whether it's the foods that we eat, the relationships that 282 00:12:45,120 --> 00:12:47,640 Speaker 2: we have, the physical activity that we do. Even if 283 00:12:47,640 --> 00:12:50,679 Speaker 2: it's a raining outside, my Grandma will be walking around 284 00:12:50,720 --> 00:12:53,440 Speaker 2: the house doing her rounds, making sure she gets her 285 00:12:53,440 --> 00:12:56,600 Speaker 2: steps in. And so all these things can really help 286 00:12:56,640 --> 00:12:58,960 Speaker 2: to contribute towards us not just feeling our best when 287 00:12:58,960 --> 00:13:01,600 Speaker 2: we're older, but also looking the best version of ourself too. 288 00:13:01,920 --> 00:13:04,520 Speaker 2: I think sometimes we also have this distorted version of 289 00:13:04,559 --> 00:13:06,760 Speaker 2: the past in our mind. You know, you look at 290 00:13:06,760 --> 00:13:09,319 Speaker 2: one photo when you start reminiscing over the past versions 291 00:13:09,320 --> 00:13:12,960 Speaker 2: of yourself, forgetting how self conscious you probably were even 292 00:13:12,960 --> 00:13:16,080 Speaker 2: in that state. So is it you getting older or 293 00:13:16,160 --> 00:13:19,400 Speaker 2: is it an overall unhealthy mindset shift that needs to happen, 294 00:13:19,880 --> 00:13:22,480 Speaker 2: Because actually, if I think about it, you know, when 295 00:13:22,480 --> 00:13:24,520 Speaker 2: I look back at these pictures and I'm like, oh 296 00:13:24,520 --> 00:13:26,400 Speaker 2: my gosh, this part of my body was so much 297 00:13:26,440 --> 00:13:29,760 Speaker 2: tighter back then, or whatever it is. Or my face 298 00:13:29,840 --> 00:13:32,440 Speaker 2: never used to do this if you can see me 299 00:13:32,480 --> 00:13:35,880 Speaker 2: on camera, but never use this scrunch together like it 300 00:13:35,920 --> 00:13:39,000 Speaker 2: does now. I also think back to those times, and 301 00:13:39,320 --> 00:13:41,920 Speaker 2: if I really think about it, I was so anxious 302 00:13:41,960 --> 00:13:44,040 Speaker 2: going into a room. I was so anxious about what 303 00:13:44,040 --> 00:13:46,400 Speaker 2: people were thinking about what I was wearing, Like there's 304 00:13:46,440 --> 00:13:48,920 Speaker 2: just so many added things that you don't remember. When 305 00:13:48,920 --> 00:13:50,960 Speaker 2: you look at one picture of yourself, you're looking at 306 00:13:51,000 --> 00:13:53,240 Speaker 2: your physical self, but like, were you even happy then? 307 00:13:53,559 --> 00:13:57,040 Speaker 2: And so really, whether you were your more beautiful self 308 00:13:57,040 --> 00:13:59,760 Speaker 2: and inverted commas back then, did that make any difference 309 00:13:59,760 --> 00:14:02,200 Speaker 2: to your enjoy your happiness. Were you just as miserable 310 00:14:02,200 --> 00:14:04,280 Speaker 2: then as you are now? And if that's the case, 311 00:14:04,400 --> 00:14:07,599 Speaker 2: it's actually not your physical body that's determining your mindset. 312 00:14:07,840 --> 00:14:10,840 Speaker 2: It's your mindset that needs to shift, regardless of what 313 00:14:10,960 --> 00:14:13,600 Speaker 2: version of yourself you are in. When I was younger, 314 00:14:13,600 --> 00:14:15,120 Speaker 2: what I wanted to do is look like a woman. 315 00:14:15,280 --> 00:14:16,760 Speaker 2: And then I became a woman, and I want to 316 00:14:16,800 --> 00:14:18,959 Speaker 2: look skinnier. And then I got to a certain age, 317 00:14:19,000 --> 00:14:21,040 Speaker 2: and then all you want to do is look younger. 318 00:14:21,240 --> 00:14:25,240 Speaker 2: This constant lack of contentment and acceptance can only shift 319 00:14:25,360 --> 00:14:29,440 Speaker 2: with daily changes in our mental conversation and consciously speaking 320 00:14:29,480 --> 00:14:32,280 Speaker 2: about things differently when you speak about yourself to other people, 321 00:14:32,520 --> 00:14:35,600 Speaker 2: when you talk about others to people, like, how are 322 00:14:35,640 --> 00:14:38,960 Speaker 2: you speaking about other people and the way that they look? 323 00:14:39,040 --> 00:14:42,200 Speaker 2: How are you speaking about yourself? When people compliment you, 324 00:14:42,440 --> 00:14:45,160 Speaker 2: whatever it is like, you really just start paying attention 325 00:14:45,280 --> 00:14:47,520 Speaker 2: of the words that you are choosing when you are 326 00:14:48,160 --> 00:14:50,600 Speaker 2: throwing them out or even having them in your head, 327 00:14:50,640 --> 00:14:53,320 Speaker 2: because you are creating the environment that you are in 328 00:14:53,520 --> 00:14:55,320 Speaker 2: just based on the thoughts and the words that you 329 00:14:55,360 --> 00:14:57,640 Speaker 2: are keeping around you. Whatever you say out loud is 330 00:14:57,640 --> 00:14:59,920 Speaker 2: still part of your environment, and whatever you keep into 331 00:15:00,000 --> 00:15:02,320 Speaker 2: Hanley is part of your environment, and so both of 332 00:15:02,320 --> 00:15:05,560 Speaker 2: those things have the ability to completely shift our mindset. 333 00:15:06,000 --> 00:15:08,560 Speaker 2: I've been working on shifting the language that I use, Like, 334 00:15:08,600 --> 00:15:10,800 Speaker 2: how many times have you heard or said, oh my god, 335 00:15:11,200 --> 00:15:13,800 Speaker 2: you don't look xx sex years old? You look so 336 00:15:13,880 --> 00:15:16,920 Speaker 2: much younger. But like, what does thirty four or twenty 337 00:15:17,000 --> 00:15:19,840 Speaker 2: five or fifty even look like? Every single twenty four 338 00:15:19,880 --> 00:15:21,880 Speaker 2: year old looks a little bit different, every single fifty 339 00:15:21,960 --> 00:15:23,920 Speaker 2: year old looks a little bit different. So when you're 340 00:15:23,960 --> 00:15:27,000 Speaker 2: telling someone, oh my goodness, you look so great, you 341 00:15:27,040 --> 00:15:29,240 Speaker 2: don't even look your age, well maybe they do look 342 00:15:29,280 --> 00:15:32,080 Speaker 2: that age, but they just look phenomenal. And so why 343 00:15:32,080 --> 00:15:33,920 Speaker 2: does age have to be linked to that. It doesn't 344 00:15:33,960 --> 00:15:36,040 Speaker 2: have to be you don't look your age. It can 345 00:15:36,160 --> 00:15:38,560 Speaker 2: just be you look magnificent. I think we're used to 346 00:15:38,560 --> 00:15:40,480 Speaker 2: saying it as a compliment in some way, but you're 347 00:15:40,520 --> 00:15:43,560 Speaker 2: really just feeding that narrative in your own mind and 348 00:15:43,960 --> 00:15:47,520 Speaker 2: in you know, society, that you only look beautiful if 349 00:15:47,560 --> 00:15:50,160 Speaker 2: you look younger because you look a specific age instead 350 00:15:50,560 --> 00:15:53,320 Speaker 2: a simple wow, you look gorgeous, your skin is gorgeous, 351 00:15:53,400 --> 00:15:57,920 Speaker 2: You are so vibrant, you oose confident energy. Those are 352 00:15:58,000 --> 00:16:01,320 Speaker 2: great compliments more so so then you don't look your age, 353 00:16:01,320 --> 00:16:03,400 Speaker 2: because at the end of the day, that then also 354 00:16:03,440 --> 00:16:05,200 Speaker 2: feeds their mind thinking, oh my gosh, I have to 355 00:16:05,200 --> 00:16:07,560 Speaker 2: stay looking this way, And so it's really actually not 356 00:16:07,600 --> 00:16:09,960 Speaker 2: a compliment. It probably just increases the anxiety that is 357 00:16:09,960 --> 00:16:12,520 Speaker 2: in the other person. Also, I was thinking about how 358 00:16:12,560 --> 00:16:15,520 Speaker 2: if you're constantly reminiscing and living in the past, thinking 359 00:16:15,600 --> 00:16:18,280 Speaker 2: that those are the good times, it's really you telling 360 00:16:18,320 --> 00:16:20,920 Speaker 2: yourself that there is no more goodness coming your way, 361 00:16:21,440 --> 00:16:23,400 Speaker 2: and why is it just downhill from here? 362 00:16:23,520 --> 00:16:24,400 Speaker 1: It's absolutely not. 363 00:16:24,760 --> 00:16:26,400 Speaker 2: If you do feel that way, that might be a 364 00:16:26,440 --> 00:16:29,040 Speaker 2: sign that it's time to reignite your zest and excitement 365 00:16:29,120 --> 00:16:32,480 Speaker 2: for life. If you feel like your best ears are gone, 366 00:16:32,560 --> 00:16:35,320 Speaker 2: then you might need to redefine what brings you joy 367 00:16:35,360 --> 00:16:37,880 Speaker 2: and meaning in life, because there is so much more 368 00:16:37,920 --> 00:16:41,080 Speaker 2: to experience. There's so much more to live, and so 369 00:16:41,160 --> 00:16:44,520 Speaker 2: much more to feel fulfilled by. I promise you there 370 00:16:44,600 --> 00:16:47,600 Speaker 2: definitely is. You just have to have the desire to 371 00:16:47,600 --> 00:16:50,320 Speaker 2: see it and the eyes clear enough to recognize it 372 00:16:50,320 --> 00:16:53,680 Speaker 2: when it comes your way. And sometimes when I feel 373 00:16:53,680 --> 00:16:55,560 Speaker 2: like I've lost the vision for it, I honestly just 374 00:16:55,560 --> 00:16:57,200 Speaker 2: pray it. I'm like just give me the sight to 375 00:16:57,240 --> 00:16:59,480 Speaker 2: see all the goodness in life, Give me the sight 376 00:16:59,600 --> 00:17:02,520 Speaker 2: to see the blessings that come my way, because there's 377 00:17:02,560 --> 00:17:04,240 Speaker 2: so many times that things do come our way and 378 00:17:04,280 --> 00:17:07,080 Speaker 2: we're in such a bad space in life, or we're 379 00:17:07,080 --> 00:17:09,280 Speaker 2: in such a negative mindset that it just goes by 380 00:17:09,359 --> 00:17:11,480 Speaker 2: us and we don't even recognize it as a blessing. 381 00:17:12,000 --> 00:17:14,040 Speaker 2: If you are in a low space and you're constantly 382 00:17:14,080 --> 00:17:16,480 Speaker 2: thinking about the negatives in your life or feeling bad 383 00:17:16,480 --> 00:17:19,280 Speaker 2: about your own body. Honestly, prayer has been such a 384 00:17:19,280 --> 00:17:23,000 Speaker 2: beautiful thing for me to shift my mindset of just 385 00:17:23,119 --> 00:17:25,520 Speaker 2: please let me see the blessings that enter my life. 386 00:17:25,560 --> 00:17:28,960 Speaker 2: Please let me see the goodness that is in my 387 00:17:29,040 --> 00:17:31,679 Speaker 2: own body, that is in my own physical features. Like 388 00:17:32,119 --> 00:17:34,480 Speaker 2: open my eyes so I can see it, because there 389 00:17:34,560 --> 00:17:37,000 Speaker 2: is so much of it in you and outside of you. 390 00:17:37,560 --> 00:17:39,480 Speaker 2: It is so natural to feel nostalgic about the way 391 00:17:39,480 --> 00:17:41,840 Speaker 2: you look in your twenties or your thirties, But clinging 392 00:17:41,920 --> 00:17:44,439 Speaker 2: to the past just keeps you from appreciating the present. 393 00:17:44,840 --> 00:17:47,040 Speaker 2: And when you focus on what you've lost, you just 394 00:17:47,119 --> 00:17:50,240 Speaker 2: miss out on everything that you are gaining. Also, you know, 395 00:17:50,320 --> 00:17:54,160 Speaker 2: I absolutely love lately it's seeing all these incredible badass 396 00:17:54,200 --> 00:17:56,480 Speaker 2: women really showing us what it looks like to be 397 00:17:56,600 --> 00:18:00,160 Speaker 2: sexy and beautiful and phenomenal at every single stage of life. Life. 398 00:18:00,760 --> 00:18:03,960 Speaker 2: You know, whether it's Pamela Anderson, Jane Fonder like they're 399 00:18:04,040 --> 00:18:08,000 Speaker 2: so gangster, Alicia Keys goes on red carpets with no 400 00:18:08,119 --> 00:18:11,960 Speaker 2: makeup on, just skincare, and it's just amazing to see. 401 00:18:12,160 --> 00:18:14,200 Speaker 2: So if you are looking for them, there are plenty 402 00:18:14,280 --> 00:18:16,959 Speaker 2: of beautiful role models out there that are showing us 403 00:18:16,960 --> 00:18:19,280 Speaker 2: how it's done to feel comfortable in our skin. Kate 404 00:18:19,320 --> 00:18:22,400 Speaker 2: Winslet I recently saw interview with her. She is gorgeous 405 00:18:22,440 --> 00:18:25,080 Speaker 2: and she just talks about how ridiculous she thinks that 406 00:18:25,320 --> 00:18:28,080 Speaker 2: this narrative on aging is and she really defies it. 407 00:18:28,400 --> 00:18:30,399 Speaker 2: So there are so many beautiful examples if we are 408 00:18:30,440 --> 00:18:32,800 Speaker 2: seeking them. It just depends what we choose to absorb 409 00:18:32,840 --> 00:18:35,560 Speaker 2: and what we choose to take in through media. Shifting 410 00:18:35,560 --> 00:18:38,160 Speaker 2: your mindset around aging is not about blind optimism. It's 411 00:18:38,200 --> 00:18:40,840 Speaker 2: just about perspective. So here are some truths to hold 412 00:18:40,880 --> 00:18:44,080 Speaker 2: on to whenever your mind is spiraling. You are more 413 00:18:44,080 --> 00:18:46,919 Speaker 2: than your parents, Your value is not tied to your looks, 414 00:18:46,960 --> 00:18:49,560 Speaker 2: and aging does not diminish your worth. I want you 415 00:18:49,640 --> 00:18:51,800 Speaker 2: to listen again when I say this. 416 00:18:52,520 --> 00:18:53,760 Speaker 1: You're more than your parents. 417 00:18:54,119 --> 00:18:56,800 Speaker 2: Your value is not tied to your looks, and aging 418 00:18:57,400 --> 00:19:00,719 Speaker 2: does not diminish your worth. The second one is you 419 00:19:00,760 --> 00:19:05,680 Speaker 2: have gained tools for life. With age comes emotional intelligence, patience, 420 00:19:05,720 --> 00:19:09,000 Speaker 2: and ability to navigate challenges with grace. And the third 421 00:19:09,000 --> 00:19:12,160 Speaker 2: one is you are still evolving. Aging is not the end. 422 00:19:12,320 --> 00:19:12,960 Speaker 1: It's a new. 423 00:19:12,880 --> 00:19:16,639 Speaker 2: Chapter filled with opportunities for growth and joy. So the 424 00:19:16,680 --> 00:19:19,199 Speaker 2: first one was you are more than your appearance, the 425 00:19:19,240 --> 00:19:22,399 Speaker 2: second one was you've gained tools for life, and the 426 00:19:22,440 --> 00:19:25,120 Speaker 2: third one was you are still evolving. You may need 427 00:19:25,160 --> 00:19:27,800 Speaker 2: to write them out, put them up on your mirror, 428 00:19:27,880 --> 00:19:30,800 Speaker 2: whatever it takes, but just have these as your reminders 429 00:19:31,200 --> 00:19:35,000 Speaker 2: whenever you are feeling down about your own physical body 430 00:19:35,160 --> 00:19:38,359 Speaker 2: or your appearance. And lastly, when you catch yourself longing 431 00:19:38,400 --> 00:19:40,000 Speaker 2: for the past, pause and ask. 432 00:19:39,960 --> 00:19:41,600 Speaker 1: What do I love about who I am today? 433 00:19:42,160 --> 00:19:45,240 Speaker 2: Shift your focus and help see yourself for who you 434 00:19:45,280 --> 00:19:48,000 Speaker 2: are today and find appreciation for it rather than think 435 00:19:48,040 --> 00:19:49,719 Speaker 2: about all the good things that you had. Because I 436 00:19:49,720 --> 00:19:53,280 Speaker 2: guarantee you you've probably incredible right now. You're probably an 437 00:19:53,320 --> 00:19:56,200 Speaker 2: amazing human being that has done so much in life 438 00:19:56,320 --> 00:19:58,160 Speaker 2: and there's so much more to give and so much 439 00:19:58,200 --> 00:20:00,679 Speaker 2: more to do. But if you're constantly thinking about the 440 00:20:00,680 --> 00:20:03,760 Speaker 2: good things that you had, you're not focusing on the 441 00:20:03,800 --> 00:20:06,680 Speaker 2: things that you actually have right now. And so every 442 00:20:06,720 --> 00:20:09,600 Speaker 2: single time you catch yourself in the past, say to yourself, well, 443 00:20:09,640 --> 00:20:12,159 Speaker 2: what do I love about who I am today? And 444 00:20:12,280 --> 00:20:15,600 Speaker 2: find your list? Okay, you better have a list by 445 00:20:15,600 --> 00:20:16,720 Speaker 2: the end of this week. I want you to have 446 00:20:16,720 --> 00:20:18,560 Speaker 2: a list of like, at least ten things. That's a 447 00:20:18,560 --> 00:20:21,000 Speaker 2: minimum of ten. Okay, I want you to have way 448 00:20:21,040 --> 00:20:23,879 Speaker 2: more things. Have your list of things that you appreciate, 449 00:20:23,960 --> 00:20:26,760 Speaker 2: love and value about yourself, and keep them as a 450 00:20:26,760 --> 00:20:29,240 Speaker 2: reminder somewhere the little list for you to go back to. 451 00:20:29,760 --> 00:20:33,639 Speaker 2: This is so interesting, Okay. So I have been a 452 00:20:33,640 --> 00:20:36,399 Speaker 2: little bit obsessed with chat GUPT lately. It scares me 453 00:20:36,400 --> 00:20:38,320 Speaker 2: a little bit, but I've also been learning how to, 454 00:20:38,800 --> 00:20:41,560 Speaker 2: you know, make it my friend. And so I wrote 455 00:20:41,560 --> 00:20:43,879 Speaker 2: into chat GPT I said, can you give me some 456 00:20:44,000 --> 00:20:47,800 Speaker 2: motivating words for women who are aging to really empower 457 00:20:47,840 --> 00:20:51,240 Speaker 2: them and help them to understand what it means to 458 00:20:51,280 --> 00:20:55,000 Speaker 2: have the beauty of aging? And it gave me the 459 00:20:55,040 --> 00:20:57,440 Speaker 2: most beautiful poem, and I'm going to read it to you, guys, 460 00:20:57,480 --> 00:21:00,600 Speaker 2: because if chat GPT knows it, you better know it too, 461 00:21:01,280 --> 00:21:04,080 Speaker 2: says the beauty of becoming. There is a quiet power 462 00:21:04,119 --> 00:21:06,560 Speaker 2: in the way a woman ages. It is not the 463 00:21:06,600 --> 00:21:10,120 Speaker 2: surrender to time, but the mastery of it. Each year 464 00:21:10,240 --> 00:21:13,880 Speaker 2: etched into her skin like poetry, each wrinkle a verse 465 00:21:13,920 --> 00:21:17,800 Speaker 2: of laughter, love and lessons learned. The world tells her 466 00:21:17,800 --> 00:21:21,199 Speaker 2: that youth is beauty, but she knows better. Beauty is 467 00:21:21,240 --> 00:21:23,879 Speaker 2: the way she rises again and again in the face 468 00:21:23,920 --> 00:21:27,160 Speaker 2: of loss, change, and the silent battles no one sees. 469 00:21:27,800 --> 00:21:31,320 Speaker 2: When she was younger, she's sort approval. Now she seeks truth. 470 00:21:31,960 --> 00:21:35,199 Speaker 2: She no longer asks for space, She takes it. She 471 00:21:35,240 --> 00:21:38,000 Speaker 2: does not shrink to fit the mold of what is expected. 472 00:21:38,200 --> 00:21:41,080 Speaker 2: She expands to become everything she was meant to be. 473 00:21:42,040 --> 00:21:45,480 Speaker 2: Aging is not fading. It is a becoming, a becoming 474 00:21:45,520 --> 00:21:48,800 Speaker 2: of wisdom, of grace, of a strength that does not waver. 475 00:21:49,240 --> 00:21:52,040 Speaker 2: She wears her years like armor and adornment, knowing that 476 00:21:52,080 --> 00:21:55,920 Speaker 2: every experience has made her more, more resilient, more fearless, 477 00:21:56,080 --> 00:21:59,680 Speaker 2: more herself. She is not past her prime. She is 478 00:21:59,680 --> 00:22:02,880 Speaker 2: step into it, and the world will learn to keep up. 479 00:22:03,680 --> 00:22:07,560 Speaker 2: First of all, chet GPT bravo, because that was a 480 00:22:07,560 --> 00:22:09,920 Speaker 2: pretty epic poem. But even more than that, I was 481 00:22:09,960 --> 00:22:13,320 Speaker 2: thinking after reading that, you know, one thing that really 482 00:22:13,359 --> 00:22:17,280 Speaker 2: motivates me to not give in to trying to change 483 00:22:17,760 --> 00:22:22,960 Speaker 2: my body in using surgeries or you know, God, or 484 00:22:23,000 --> 00:22:25,800 Speaker 2: the treatments possible that are out there, and try and 485 00:22:25,960 --> 00:22:29,320 Speaker 2: do things as naturally as possible. There's two things to it. 486 00:22:29,560 --> 00:22:33,840 Speaker 2: One is what example am I setting for my future children, 487 00:22:34,080 --> 00:22:37,959 Speaker 2: for my niece, my nephew, for the people that I 488 00:22:38,000 --> 00:22:40,959 Speaker 2: share content with online. You know, we all have a 489 00:22:41,000 --> 00:22:44,359 Speaker 2: circle of influence, the circle of the people that we 490 00:22:44,920 --> 00:22:49,400 Speaker 2: have the ability to impact. And whenever I think about that, 491 00:22:49,480 --> 00:22:51,880 Speaker 2: I think, however, I live my life as an example 492 00:22:51,920 --> 00:22:54,360 Speaker 2: to other people of how I think others should live 493 00:22:54,400 --> 00:22:57,280 Speaker 2: their life and for the people who even if it's 494 00:22:57,359 --> 00:23:00,200 Speaker 2: one person or ten people or a million people, it's 495 00:23:00,240 --> 00:23:03,399 Speaker 2: like I am setting that narrative an example to those people. 496 00:23:03,720 --> 00:23:05,919 Speaker 2: What is it I want to show them? And so 497 00:23:06,040 --> 00:23:08,840 Speaker 2: I've really held on to that when it's come to 498 00:23:09,480 --> 00:23:12,080 Speaker 2: you know, the little the little treatments that you can 499 00:23:12,119 --> 00:23:15,440 Speaker 2: get done, a bit of botox, bit of whatever else, 500 00:23:15,480 --> 00:23:18,720 Speaker 2: fillers whatever it is, and I really rebelled against it 501 00:23:18,960 --> 00:23:22,760 Speaker 2: rebelled against it in my mind, rebelled against it with society, 502 00:23:23,280 --> 00:23:27,480 Speaker 2: because I truly believe that if you don't start embracing it, 503 00:23:27,520 --> 00:23:29,439 Speaker 2: you're just you know, do I want my kids, my 504 00:23:29,640 --> 00:23:33,040 Speaker 2: little children, when I have them, to see me as 505 00:23:33,119 --> 00:23:36,080 Speaker 2: me or see me as this version that I keep 506 00:23:36,160 --> 00:23:38,600 Speaker 2: trying to chase. If I'm not comfortable in my skin, 507 00:23:38,680 --> 00:23:40,240 Speaker 2: how can I teach others to be? How can I 508 00:23:40,240 --> 00:23:42,040 Speaker 2: teach my children to be, my niece to be, my 509 00:23:42,080 --> 00:23:45,399 Speaker 2: nephew to be? And so that's one and the second 510 00:23:45,400 --> 00:23:48,879 Speaker 2: part to it. I speak about this a lot, but 511 00:23:49,040 --> 00:23:52,000 Speaker 2: it's because it's in my mind all the time, and 512 00:23:52,040 --> 00:23:55,200 Speaker 2: it's that if I don't start accepting myself now, if 513 00:23:55,200 --> 00:23:58,240 Speaker 2: I don't start accepting aging now, because as we said, 514 00:23:58,280 --> 00:24:02,720 Speaker 2: it is inevitable either avoid avoid avoid, and at some 515 00:24:02,800 --> 00:24:04,760 Speaker 2: point it accumulates and you have to have a mid 516 00:24:04,800 --> 00:24:08,720 Speaker 2: life crisis or a late life crisis where suddenly you 517 00:24:08,760 --> 00:24:11,800 Speaker 2: come to the realization that nothing more you can do 518 00:24:11,920 --> 00:24:14,399 Speaker 2: to your face or your body will keep you at 519 00:24:14,400 --> 00:24:17,240 Speaker 2: the age that you want to be, and then you 520 00:24:17,280 --> 00:24:20,480 Speaker 2: come to terms with aging or slowly, bit by bit, 521 00:24:20,560 --> 00:24:24,080 Speaker 2: wrinkle by a wrinkle, expression line by expression, line, ache 522 00:24:24,080 --> 00:24:28,840 Speaker 2: by ache, whatever it is, all the small, tiny, tiny 523 00:24:28,880 --> 00:24:32,560 Speaker 2: ways that aging becomes apparent to us, we embrace it 524 00:24:32,640 --> 00:24:35,879 Speaker 2: step by step, little by little, And I choose the 525 00:24:35,920 --> 00:24:37,960 Speaker 2: second one. I don't want to be attached to my 526 00:24:38,000 --> 00:24:41,119 Speaker 2: body so deeply that I'm constantly fixated on how I 527 00:24:41,160 --> 00:24:44,520 Speaker 2: can shift, change and adapt it to be the version 528 00:24:44,600 --> 00:24:47,640 Speaker 2: that I believe society wants me to be. I'd rather 529 00:24:48,240 --> 00:24:51,879 Speaker 2: accept it so I can embrace myself and then embrace 530 00:24:51,960 --> 00:24:55,600 Speaker 2: other people so deeply. And if I accept myself, have 531 00:24:55,680 --> 00:24:59,840 Speaker 2: the ability to accept others more deeply. So I heard 532 00:24:59,840 --> 00:25:02,440 Speaker 2: that this episode gave you a different perspective, and it 533 00:25:02,480 --> 00:25:06,320 Speaker 2: gave you encouragement to just love yourself deeper, because honestly, 534 00:25:07,200 --> 00:25:09,200 Speaker 2: the less we love ourselves, the more love we're putting 535 00:25:09,200 --> 00:25:11,200 Speaker 2: out into the world. And there is enough hate going 536 00:25:11,200 --> 00:25:13,679 Speaker 2: on in this world right now, and so just think of. 537 00:25:13,680 --> 00:25:14,440 Speaker 1: It in that way too. 538 00:25:14,560 --> 00:25:17,400 Speaker 2: The more that you accept and love yourself, the more 539 00:25:17,440 --> 00:25:19,600 Speaker 2: love and acceptance that you are giving out to other people. 540 00:25:19,640 --> 00:25:23,400 Speaker 2: And damn do we need it right now, like it 541 00:25:23,440 --> 00:25:28,320 Speaker 2: is so necessary, more so than ever. And so by 542 00:25:28,359 --> 00:25:30,919 Speaker 2: doing that for yourself and giving yourself grace, you're also 543 00:25:31,480 --> 00:25:36,000 Speaker 2: contributing to the world's consciousness and joy and happiness and 544 00:25:36,160 --> 00:25:39,159 Speaker 2: love that is being poured into the world. Thank you 545 00:25:39,200 --> 00:25:42,119 Speaker 2: so much for listening, sending your so much love, and 546 00:25:42,600 --> 00:25:46,720 Speaker 2: just remember that every single emotion that comes your way 547 00:25:47,280 --> 00:25:49,639 Speaker 2: has the ability to shape who you are, but also 548 00:25:50,440 --> 00:25:52,920 Speaker 2: that you can accept it, experience it, and then also 549 00:25:53,000 --> 00:25:54,800 Speaker 2: let it flow through you. It does not have to 550 00:25:54,840 --> 00:25:57,440 Speaker 2: live in you if you don't want it to. Thank 551 00:25:57,480 --> 00:26:07,359 Speaker 2: you so much and have a wonderful, wonderful weeks. He