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Speaker 1: Welcome everybody to Amy and TJ. On this beautiful day

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Speaker 1: here in New York City. It is hot, hot, hot,

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Speaker 1: and I'm not complaining, how about you?

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Speaker 2: Uh No, it's I think it changes people's moods when

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Speaker 2: the weather gets gets nice like this, and then you

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Speaker 2: get on the subway and you realize attitudes were just

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Speaker 2: the same as they were on a cold day.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, we did notice that today. Couldn't wait to get

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Speaker 1: back up on the ground and get out of that

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Speaker 1: subterranean mess. It kind of feels like the same every day.

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Speaker 1: It's like drudgery down there. But it's the fastest way

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Speaker 1: anywhere in the city, and so I'll keep taking it

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Speaker 1: and try to keep a smile on my face. Still

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Speaker 1: have a smile on my face from yesterday. And Elise,

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Speaker 1: it's mixed emotions. But my baby, my youngest, had her

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Speaker 1: senior prom and god, it was beautiful weather and it

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Speaker 1: was Oh. I think everybody imagines what their senior prom

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Speaker 1: is going to be like, and it's pretty cool. She

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Speaker 1: goes to an all girls Jesuit high school here in

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Speaker 1: the city, and so prom's a little different from when

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Speaker 1: I went to high school. The stress of finding a

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Speaker 1: date and then getting the crusage and having the date

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Speaker 1: come pick you up. My daughter decided to basically just

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Speaker 1: go with a group of friends, and I just thought

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Speaker 1: it was so cool to see all the girls out there,

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Speaker 1: and she asked us moms to all come and help

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Speaker 1: them get ready. And it was just a really joyful,

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Speaker 1: joyful day to see her laughing and care free and

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Speaker 1: just hitting this milestone in her life. And I'm trying

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Speaker 1: not to cry and just being joyful.

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Speaker 3: Because yeah, it's almost like the end of an era,

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Speaker 3: but I know it's the beginning of a new one.

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Speaker 2: No, She's had a lot of milestones late. That had

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Speaker 2: her eighteenth birthday, which is on the same day as

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Speaker 2: her last day of high school. That all ended it

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Speaker 2: at the same time, essentially her youth in her high

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Speaker 2: school career. But then she got into Colorado the university.

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Speaker 2: She's a buffalo, got worse. She's going to get to

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Speaker 2: travel overseas study brush. She's had a lot going on

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Speaker 2: and it's not done yet. So it's just a special

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Speaker 2: time for parents and for kids right about now, who

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Speaker 2: are a lot of graduations all over the country.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, it's like, oh, I'm ting not to cry, but

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Speaker 3: you have these mixed emotions where you're like so excited

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Speaker 3: for them to go off into the world. But yeah,

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Speaker 3: it's like when you've spent the last twenty plus years

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Speaker 3: taking care of your kids and they're gone, it's it's

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Speaker 3: a lot to contend with. I actually saw Jennifer Gardner

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Speaker 3: posted something on Instagram yesterday because her oldest Violet, graduated

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Speaker 3: from high school and she was a rack.

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Speaker 1: She was crying. She was like, what am I supposed

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Speaker 1: to do? And I really related, and I think a

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Speaker 1: lot of parents out there do too. Where like and

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Speaker 1: I would never want analyse to see me cry because

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Speaker 1: I don't want that pressure on her. But if I

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Speaker 1: talk about it, honestly, I will lose it. I haven't

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Speaker 1: fully processed it. And yeah, but it was beautif full

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Speaker 1: to see. And I really was like so happy yesterday

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Speaker 1: watching her with her girlfriends and in their gowns and

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Speaker 1: it was for them and celebrating their time in high school.

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Speaker 1: It was you know, I think one of the girls

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Speaker 1: had a date and the other girl had a friend,

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Speaker 1: but the rest of them, I think there was five

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Speaker 1: girls just all going. We used to call it stag,

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Speaker 1: but I don't think that's even a term anymore. But

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Speaker 1: they all just went with one another and it was

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Speaker 1: beautiful and I'm leaning into this new normal. But sorry, babe,

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Speaker 1: it's going to be a little rocky over the next

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Speaker 1: couple of months before I actually say goodbye to her

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Speaker 1: in August for college.

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Speaker 2: She's gonna be a little rocky.

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Speaker 1: Well, I'm gonna be a little emotional.

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Speaker 2: I think you're always emotional. No, I mean I didn't

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Speaker 2: say as it is, so I don't. I don't know. No,

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Speaker 2: I know all your levels of it. Like I said,

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Speaker 2: I always say, you don't united different moves, you're different levels.

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Speaker 2: So yeah, no, it's it's it's fun to watch. You're

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Speaker 2: more excited than not excited that she's going to be gone,

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Speaker 2: but you're excited for her, and this is is a

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Speaker 2: part of it, and it's it's been wonderful to watch

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Speaker 2: from my vantage point. But she's she's a good one,

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Speaker 2: and she's a good one in a way that she does.

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Speaker 2: I've seen it when you didn't weren't even aware of it,

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Speaker 2: where she does the right thing behind your back without

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Speaker 2: you ever knowing. You don't have to tell her to

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Speaker 2: say hey, make sure you say thank you, or make

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Speaker 2: sure you're this kind of polite, or do this thing,

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Speaker 2: or she does it on our own. She's a good kid,

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Speaker 2: she's never great.

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Speaker 1: That's good to hear. Well. She was also very excited

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Speaker 1: because it was a big another milestone for her. I

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Speaker 1: don't know how other parents handled this, and certainly I

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Speaker 1: wasn't extended this and to each their own, but I

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Speaker 1: made this rule up for Eva, my oldest, on her

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Speaker 1: prom It was the first night of her life that

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Speaker 1: I didn't enforce a curfew, and so it kind of

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Speaker 1: set off this. You know, you're you're going into adulthood.

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Speaker 1: I've to your point, I've hopefully instilled all the values

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Speaker 1: I can in you, and now I'm going to give

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Speaker 1: you some freedom. I'm gonna I'm not gonna cut the rope,

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Speaker 1: but I'm going to loosen it a lot. And so

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Speaker 1: I found out today. They came in at four am,

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Speaker 1: so that was really exciting to them, to her especially, So, yeah,

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Speaker 1: she had her first non curfew, and you know she's

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Speaker 1: going to be in college in a few months anyway,

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Speaker 1: so and she's traveling the summer without me, So it's

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Speaker 1: kind of silly to try to keep that control on

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Speaker 1: a night where I knew she was with her girlfriends.

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Speaker 1: And the nice thing about the city is they're not

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Speaker 1: jumping into cars drinking and driving. That's just not that's

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Speaker 1: something that doesn't happen in the city because you're jumping

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Speaker 1: in an uber and you're with a group. So I

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Speaker 1: felt a little bit more comfortable giving her that leeway.

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Speaker 1: But she had a Oh she knew what was happening

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Speaker 1: because it had already happened with Ava and she was

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Speaker 1: counting down the days until she didn't have a curfew.

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Speaker 1: So I guess, I guess that's now the new thing,

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Speaker 1: which I'm not sure I'll be totally okay with all

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Speaker 1: the time. But it seemed to go well. Yesterday they

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Speaker 1: were all in there. It's funny. I knew that they

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Speaker 1: We woke up and I said, let me just see

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Speaker 1: to make sure they made it home. And I just

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Speaker 1: saw a bunch of shoes all thrown in the middle

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Speaker 1: of the hallway. I was like, yep, they're here, they

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Speaker 1: made it back. I'm good. So it was a fun night,

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Speaker 1: and there's gonna be a lot more fun days ahead

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Speaker 1: before she leaves. I know.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I saw them when they came in at four,

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Speaker 2: since that's my wake up time.

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Speaker 4: Anyway, you did not, You're it was the end of it,

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Speaker 4: you know, I.

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Speaker 1: Was up you wait, But did you really know they

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Speaker 1: got in it for.

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Speaker 2: No, I didn't. I didn't talk to them. I didn't

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Speaker 2: want to see that mess.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, they went from prom to they had an after

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Speaker 1: party for prom, which is a thing I guess now,

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Speaker 1: and then they went to karaoke. So it was a

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Speaker 1: full night of fun and singing, and apparently their go

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Speaker 1: to song was unwritten by Natasha Beddingfield, an oldie but

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Speaker 1: a goodie. I was impressed. I was like, I like

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Speaker 1: that song. I listened to that song all the time.

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Speaker 2: What's your go to hiaoke?

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Speaker 1: Oh my god, I think it's Paradise by the Dashboard Light.

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Speaker 1: Although I was just gonna say it's an indulgent song,

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Speaker 1: because if you don't know it, you're you're like, what

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Speaker 1: the is going on? But it's meatball, No meat loaf,

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Speaker 1: that's hilarious. I just said meatball, meat loaf. Yes, I

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Speaker 1: was up late. Meat loaf and Paradise by the dashboard Light.

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Speaker 1: You know, it's a whole thing. I know every single word.

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Speaker 1: But the song goes on for like seven minutes, and

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Speaker 1: so if you can find the other person because it's

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Speaker 1: a duet who knows all the other words? It's really fun.

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Speaker 1: And but if you don't know the words, I'm sure

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Speaker 1: it's really annoying to watch me sing meat loafs Paradise

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Speaker 1: by the dashboard light.

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Speaker 2: No, I'm sure everybody at a bar at two in

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Speaker 2: the morning intoxicated love was to see a seven minute

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Speaker 2: rendition of a song they've never heard of. By you?

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Speaker 1: It's great?

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Speaker 2: Well?

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Speaker 1: Yes, and how about you? What's your go to karaoke song?

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Speaker 2: I'm too sexy? Seriously, I have no idea. I just

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Speaker 2: think that almost be you.

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Speaker 1: But if you had to do karaoke, what would be you?

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Speaker 2: Gotta give me some time on that. Have no idea,

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Speaker 2: no idea?

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Speaker 1: What the song? Do you know all the words? I mean,

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Speaker 1: I know they put the words up so you don't

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Speaker 1: have to know all the words, but it helps if

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Speaker 1: you do. Are there songs that you just know by

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Speaker 1: heart every single word?

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Speaker 2: Uh? Yeah? A lot of stuff by Prince, A lot

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Speaker 2: of stuff by Otis Redding and Sam Cook? Who the hell?

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Speaker 2: Once they hear sitting on the dock of the bay

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Speaker 2: too in the morning.

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Speaker 1: I mean, you could sway, but the lighter go up.

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Speaker 1: You know, there's a lot of ways you can enjoy that.

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Speaker 2: I think, how do you enjoy that song? We're talking

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Speaker 2: about the same song. Yeah, that that makes you want

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Speaker 2: to throw a lighter up?

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Speaker 1: Yeah you know, you know when people in the concerts

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Speaker 1: put the lighter up, it's a slower song. They sway

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Speaker 1: they got the light going.

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Speaker 2: No, really sad, it's really really I never thought of

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Speaker 2: that song as a sway with the lighter up song.

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Speaker 1: Okay, maybe it's with your arms around the person next

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Speaker 1: to you and just kind of enjoying the cadence.

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Speaker 2: Okay, yeah, this is why you don't play otis rating

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Speaker 2: at the carryoka.

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Speaker 1: All right, all right, all right, we'll have to come

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Speaker 1: up with a karaoke song later. I'm I can't wait

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Speaker 1: to hear.

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Speaker 2: Okay.

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Speaker 1: Yes, some of this weather in New York City has

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Speaker 1: been so fun and it's been good to get out

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Speaker 1: and about. And we had a couple of fun nights

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Speaker 1: and one of them we actually were at a gathering

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Speaker 1: where I saw some old friends, friends I hadn't seen

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Speaker 1: a long time, and a friend who works at was

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Speaker 1: once our competing network at NBC and they launched a

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Speaker 1: show over there that competed against GMA three, and I

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Speaker 1: hadn't spoken to this producer since all of that had

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Speaker 1: taken place.

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Speaker 3: So it was a really fun reunion. But she told

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Speaker 3: TJ and me something that was well, a little surprising,

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Speaker 3: maybe even kind of amusing now, but definitely a little shocking.

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Speaker 3: She told us that our show, GMA three, was welcoming

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Speaker 3: NBC into the daytime arena.

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Speaker 1: There wasn't a show like that. Yeah, so it's like

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Speaker 1: the we had GMA three was with Good Morning America,

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Speaker 1: but this was basically Today's show in the afternoon, and

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Speaker 1: we as a show, sent over a gift to welcome

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Speaker 1: them to daytime. We did not know that they sent

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Speaker 1: over a gift. Had you ever heard of that?

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Speaker 2: First? I heard it was the other day and apparently

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Speaker 2: this is something that took place almost two years ago now,

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Speaker 2: But no, we had no idea that this was done.

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Speaker 2: I guess you could say on our behalf.

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Speaker 1: Yes, And so this was the first as TJ just

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Speaker 1: said that we had heard about it. So we said, oh, wow,

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Speaker 1: we sent you all a gift and she was like, yes,

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Speaker 1: but do you want to know what the gift was?

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Speaker 1: And we said yes, Well, it had your faces all

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Speaker 1: over it, and we were puzzled, and she told us

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Speaker 1: that our show apparently sent over to the new NBC

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Speaker 1: show a welcome to Daytime gift package, which was cookies

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Speaker 1: with our faces on them. We were I mean, I

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Speaker 1: was a little mortified. How did you feel?

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Speaker 2: Well. It took us a while to try to understand

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Speaker 2: if she was serious or not, because we've seen this.

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Speaker 2: It happens in the industry, and people, I don't know,

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Speaker 2: they're competitors, but at the nice like a sporting event,

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Speaker 2: you shake hands with your competitor at the beginning and

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Speaker 2: at the end. But when you're out there on the

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Speaker 2: field of play, your enemies and your battling. It's the same.

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Speaker 2: In news. Yes, we go at it hard, but we

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Speaker 2: all respect each other and a lot of us are

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Speaker 2: friends for the most part in the industry, so it's

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Speaker 2: not unusual when someone has a milestone, someone in a

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Speaker 2: competing station has a baby, or someone is god forbid,

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Speaker 2: sick or got a promotion. Even you send something flowers

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Speaker 2: and a note, and that's just industry standard.

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Speaker 1: Right, I mean, when we saw we mentioned this in

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Speaker 1: an earlier podcast, when we saw even Kim Godwin, after

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Speaker 1: all that had gone gone on with us. We decided

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Speaker 1: to send a gesture to send a bottle of champagne.

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Speaker 1: I think those are all things that would be reasonable

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Speaker 1: and understandable. So we were thinking, oh, we sent over

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Speaker 1: I don't know, yes, flowers, champagne something, but no, we

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Speaker 1: sent them cookies with our faces on them. And they

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Speaker 1: were all kind of thrown by that as well, because

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Speaker 1: maybe the.

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Speaker 3: Intention was was I don't know what would the intention

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Speaker 3: be just kind of like game on welcome, but I

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Speaker 3: don't know.

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Speaker 2: It doesn't I guess it matters what the intent was.

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Speaker 2: We don't know that. All we can speak on now

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Speaker 2: is how it was received, and we know it was

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Speaker 2: received negatively. It wasn't appreciated and it was not necessarily

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Speaker 2: a laughing matter from what we were explained to us.

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Speaker 2: I mean, don't get me wrong, I don't hoot and

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Speaker 2: holland at the end of the world because some cookies

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Speaker 2: were sent, but they it was taken at least says

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Speaker 2: its explained to us as a pretty bold and pretty

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Speaker 2: rude gesture, if you will, not funny in the least bit.

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Speaker 2: So we apologize. We apologized to her on the spot

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Speaker 2: and we said, please, please, please go back to your

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Speaker 2: newsroom and tell them that we had nothing to do

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Speaker 2: with this and had no idea about it, and we're

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Speaker 2: sorry that something with our name, our faces literally on

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Speaker 2: it is something that was viewed so negatively by them,

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Speaker 2: and it was somewhat insulted.

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Speaker 1: Yes, and so yes, we deeply apologized. But she even

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Speaker 1: told us that they were kind of so taken aback.

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Speaker 1: Maybe that's the way they She described how they received

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Speaker 1: it. It was kind of shocking, and just thought, wow, they

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Speaker 1: went there, they sent us cookies with their faces on it,

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Speaker 1: Welcome to Daytime TV. And they actually took a picture

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Speaker 1: of them with the cookies, and she has it on

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Speaker 1: her desk, and it's maybe it's motivating for them to

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Speaker 1: to keep doing what they're doing. And you know what,

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Speaker 1: it is a competition, the morning show wars. I'm sure

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Speaker 1: we've all heard about it, and it's all true to

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Speaker 1: your point, TJ. Like it is competitive. We are trying

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Speaker 1: to win the ratings. Everybody wants to be number one.

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Speaker 1: That's just absolutely true. But anyway we were, we were

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Speaker 1: a little I was appalled. I was mortified that we

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Speaker 1: were a part of some gesture that we had no idea,

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Speaker 1: Like no one even told US, consulted with us, asked

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Speaker 1: us if it was okay to put our faces on

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Speaker 1: these cookies. So we were glad we finally heard the

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Speaker 1: story and that we could actually let her know that

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Speaker 1: that is nothing that we sanctioned or suggested or would

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Speaker 1: have ever wanted to have taken place. So, yes, a

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Speaker 1: formal apology was long overdue, I believe, but we were

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Speaker 1: just made aware of the situation. So that was very

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Speaker 1: That was an enlightening moment, to say the very least,

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Speaker 1: when we when we ran into her and heard all

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Speaker 1: of that. But it was well, hopefully we set the

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Speaker 1: record straight. Yes, yeah, so we've been we've been what

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Speaker 1: else we've been doing.

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Speaker 3: We've been watching TV per usual, and we were able

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Speaker 3: to actually sit down and watch not only the it's

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Speaker 3: been out there for a while, but we hadn't actually

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Speaker 3: taken the time to watch Jlo put out her movie.

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Speaker 1: I always get the names confused. What's that one called?

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Speaker 2: This is Me Now?

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Speaker 1: This is Me Now? And then the documentary of the

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Speaker 1: making of the movie, which was the greatest love story

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Speaker 1: never told? And we actually I actually really enjoyed the

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Speaker 1: documentary how about you?

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Speaker 2: We watched in that order, so we watched the and

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Speaker 2: what does she call it's not a movie? It's not

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Speaker 2: a music video movie. What's she called it not a

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Speaker 2: music movie? She had a specific way she wanted to

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Speaker 2: explain what it what the movie was. So we saw

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Speaker 2: the music movie first and we got it. We understood

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Speaker 2: what she was trying to do there. The documentary, however,

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Speaker 2: is fascinating. It is one of the most It's one

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Speaker 2: of those It was unexpected for me to see some

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Speaker 2: of the things that they left in, what was going

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Speaker 2: on behind the scenes, and just some of the dynamic

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Speaker 2: with her and her husband an athletics. So I loved, love, loved.

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Speaker 1: The documentary, and I thought she was I thought she

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Speaker 1: was very raw, very vulnerable, you know, talked about the

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Speaker 1: challenges financially of getting something like this going, but then

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Speaker 1: even getting other celebrities on board. She was trying to

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Speaker 1: incorporate some folks into the to the movie. If you

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Speaker 1: see it, several people stepped up, including the amazing Jane

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Speaker 1: Fonda to just name one. But what it was like

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Speaker 1: to be rejected by people, to be rejected by you know,

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Speaker 1: financial institutions, by networks or you know, services that would

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Speaker 1: carry this movie. Just the struggles of putting it all together.

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Speaker 1: So and she really opened up about her heart and

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Speaker 1: being maybe even a parody or something that someone laughs

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Speaker 1: at or makes fun of because she's been married four

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Speaker 1: times or had four marriages before Ben correct or is

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Speaker 1: Ben number four? Ben's number four? But then so we

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Speaker 1: just happened to take the time to watch these two,

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Speaker 1: and then all of these headlines have been popping up

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Speaker 1: about Jen and Ben and it's just for me to watch.

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Speaker 1: It's it's fairly heartbreaking because to see, yes, I know

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Speaker 1: their celebrities, Yes I know they're in the spotlight, but

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Speaker 1: to just see the unbelievable scrutiny of a relationship from

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Speaker 1: body language, who is he wearing the ring? They haven't

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Speaker 1: been seen together in X amount of days, They're being

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Speaker 1: surveilled constantly, and people always have opinions and comments about

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Speaker 1: their relationship and just the stress that I know that brings.

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Speaker 1: But I just I just feel like it's become sadly

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Speaker 1: a sport, not just in this country but around the

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Speaker 1: world to to watch people and then to almost I

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Speaker 1: don't want to say people hope for their failure, but

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Speaker 1: almost kind of reveled in reading about the failure or

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Speaker 1: reading about the problems or reading about and we don't

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Speaker 1: even know if there is an issue or if there

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Speaker 1: even is a problem. That's the whole point.

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Speaker 3: But every headline says there is, and then that's what

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Speaker 3: people believe. And I just, I think my heart goes

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Speaker 3: out to both both of them about just I can't

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Speaker 3: even imagine.

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Speaker 1: I mean, we had a certain level. There's is a

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Speaker 1: level that I cannot even imagine the scrutiny that they're

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Speaker 1: under constantly.

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Speaker 2: There's been a lot of celebrity couple I've never been

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Speaker 2: that interested in celebrity relationship news. I can see now

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Speaker 2: where I was dismissive of people in my world who

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Speaker 2: were friends or whatever, who are so invested with what

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Speaker 2: happens to some celebrity couple with I guess Brad Pitt

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Speaker 2: and Angelina, or Brad Pitt and or two of the

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Speaker 2: I guess biggest couples who had so much I guess

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Speaker 2: tabloid scrutiny. But this one, I feel so invested in

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Speaker 2: their success for reasons I can't really comprehend. I just

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Speaker 2: and more so I think it's my heart is going

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Speaker 2: out to her for a lot of reasons. The woman

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Speaker 2: I'm going to root for anybody who won't give up

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Speaker 2: on love, who keeps trying. I'm going to root for

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Speaker 2: every single time. And I know he's going through his

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Speaker 2: struggles as well. It seems like so much emphasis is

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Speaker 2: put on her given the marriages, but I hate I

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Speaker 2: can't imagine, and I am so disturbed at the possibility

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Speaker 2: that these two might not make it. And the only

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Speaker 2: reason I think that is why would I even have

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Speaker 2: that in my head? Because everybody's writing the headlines, which

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Speaker 2: not a single one could be true. It's quite possible

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Speaker 2: none of it's true. And you know this, I don't

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Speaker 2: believe anything until j Lo comes in this studio and says,

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Speaker 2: you know what, DJ, this is what's going on. I

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Speaker 2: don't believe anything because I we, from our experience, know better.

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Speaker 1: And then what happens is once one outlet writes something,

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Speaker 1: then everybody picks up on it. And then if you notice,

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Speaker 1: I know people can read things and read between the lines,

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Speaker 1: it's always sources. The amount of sources that make comments

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Speaker 1: about what is or isn't is remarkable, But what are

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Speaker 1: and who are these sources? That's I think that's the

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Speaker 1: whole thing we've gotten away from. I mean, I know

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Speaker 1: there's a blurred line between mainstream media and tabloid media

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Speaker 1: and just voyeurism. People who are who have their cameras

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Speaker 1: up and ready to take a picture and then interpret

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Speaker 1: what the body language is. I mean, it's really it's sad,

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Speaker 1: and the scrutiny is unfair, and I just it. I

402
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Speaker 1: think after our experience, I just feel even more sensitive

403
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Speaker 1: to it and make a point not to click on it.

404
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Speaker 1: But you can't escape it even on if you have

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Speaker 1: Instagram or you know, whatever social media you have, If

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Speaker 1: you scroll through it, it's it's everywhere. And I know

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Speaker 1: that that was part of the reason why they have

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Speaker 1: both said that their initial romance fell apart in part

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Speaker 1: was because of all of the public scrutinies. So I

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Speaker 1: feel for them, and I would just urge people to

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Speaker 1: reserve judgment and to ask yourself, you know, if you

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Speaker 1: care for them, you're rooting for them. I love that,

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Speaker 1: but my god, I just hate to think that people

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Speaker 1: are rooting for people's failure. Like see, I knew it.

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Speaker 1: I knew she couldn't handle it. I knew celebrity couples

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Speaker 1: can't last. I know, celebrities, you know, don't make it

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Speaker 1: it's almost as if you're rooting for that, and I

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Speaker 1: just that's what makes me feel sick. So I just,

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Speaker 1: I don't know. I just we just wanted to say

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Speaker 1: and send some love to both of them and maybe

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Speaker 1: just ask folks to reserve judgment.

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Speaker 2: Okay, what do we That's a weird thing this when

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Speaker 2: it comes to judgment about those two, it feels like

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Speaker 2: a I think I've mentioned this song before. It's an

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Speaker 2: old song. YA won't remember it, an older song meaning

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Speaker 2: Tia and Usher, my life you're entertainment. You heard me

427
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Speaker 2: talk about this song. I've been listening to it for

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Speaker 2: years and years, but I didn't really understand it until

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Speaker 2: the past two years. Maybe. But my life you're entertainment.

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Speaker 2: You watch it while I live it. You're waiting on

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Speaker 2: me to lose it. I guess I'm just here for

432
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Speaker 2: your amusement. Wow is the line, and this is Ti

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Speaker 2: and Usher're singing in the song. They of course have

434
00:22:07,280 --> 00:22:09,359
Speaker 2: dealt with all kinds of stuff impressed over the years

435
00:22:09,359 --> 00:22:11,359
Speaker 2: and time, but it does feel like that to me

436
00:22:12,000 --> 00:22:15,520
Speaker 2: that we often watch as sport. This is their life.

437
00:22:16,400 --> 00:22:18,880
Speaker 2: This is a life, a real life that has an

438
00:22:18,920 --> 00:22:22,560
Speaker 2: impact when you click it has an impact when you

439
00:22:22,640 --> 00:22:24,520
Speaker 2: read and then you spread and you want to go

440
00:22:24,520 --> 00:22:26,879
Speaker 2: put up a TikTok video and then put the hashtag,

441
00:22:26,960 --> 00:22:30,040
Speaker 2: and people jump on it because it feels like the

442
00:22:30,040 --> 00:22:32,640
Speaker 2: more you pound on them, the more followers you can get,

443
00:22:32,800 --> 00:22:34,600
Speaker 2: or you're in with the in crowd, or you're part

444
00:22:34,600 --> 00:22:38,480
Speaker 2: of this conversation. That part is really I urge, folks,

445
00:22:38,800 --> 00:22:40,959
Speaker 2: and everybody's out there, not a bad person who does that,

446
00:22:41,000 --> 00:22:44,720
Speaker 2: but we get caught up in it and not realize sometimes, well,

447
00:22:44,920 --> 00:22:47,440
Speaker 2: just my one post isn't gonna make a difference. Well

448
00:22:47,840 --> 00:22:49,800
Speaker 2: if you and a million other people do it, it

449
00:22:50,440 --> 00:22:53,280
Speaker 2: does have an impact. And they say themselves that this

450
00:22:53,400 --> 00:22:56,600
Speaker 2: type of scrutiny was part of the reason for their

451
00:22:56,920 --> 00:22:59,960
Speaker 2: break up the first time. So it does have an impact.

452
00:23:00,119 --> 00:23:03,000
Speaker 2: It does, you can actually and it had an impact

453
00:23:03,359 --> 00:23:07,439
Speaker 2: for sure in all world in how people decided to

454
00:23:07,480 --> 00:23:10,680
Speaker 2: start to scrutinize and talk and make fun and things

455
00:23:10,720 --> 00:23:13,520
Speaker 2: just kind of spiral out of control to the point

456
00:23:13,560 --> 00:23:17,520
Speaker 2: that it did. We ended up, our lives were severely

457
00:23:17,960 --> 00:23:23,600
Speaker 2: or greatly impacted by this type of thing. So we

458
00:23:23,680 --> 00:23:26,919
Speaker 2: just please, if you can just keep that in mind

459
00:23:27,200 --> 00:23:31,960
Speaker 2: when you're laughing or clicking or reading or spreading or

460
00:23:32,280 --> 00:23:36,119
Speaker 2: tweeting or whatever you may be doing that it's not

461
00:23:36,200 --> 00:23:40,159
Speaker 2: just your one post. It collectively has an impact, a

462
00:23:40,240 --> 00:23:41,080
Speaker 2: real world impact.

463
00:23:41,560 --> 00:23:46,080
Speaker 1: And I'm always amazed at just because somebody makes their

464
00:23:46,160 --> 00:23:51,560
Speaker 1: living singing, acting something in the public eye, and just

465
00:23:51,640 --> 00:23:56,320
Speaker 1: because they've done well and have money from that talent

466
00:23:56,520 --> 00:23:59,040
Speaker 1: or skill that they have shared with the world, somehow

467
00:23:59,080 --> 00:24:03,560
Speaker 1: that makes them other people's I don't want to say property,

468
00:24:03,600 --> 00:24:06,800
Speaker 1: but just that they have to just take it on

469
00:24:06,880 --> 00:24:13,000
Speaker 1: the chin. They have to expect people to have whatever

470
00:24:13,040 --> 00:24:15,159
Speaker 1: comment they want to have about them and then make

471
00:24:15,200 --> 00:24:18,760
Speaker 1: it public and then that's okay because they have money,

472
00:24:18,800 --> 00:24:22,639
Speaker 1: and because they chose to be in an artistic field

473
00:24:22,760 --> 00:24:25,880
Speaker 1: that has publicity attached to it. I just think that's

474
00:24:25,880 --> 00:24:28,240
Speaker 1: an unfair You know, you deserve it, or you should

475
00:24:28,280 --> 00:24:30,760
Speaker 1: be able to take it because you know dot dot dot.

476
00:24:30,880 --> 00:24:34,400
Speaker 1: I'm curious, what would you say, I mean, and we

477
00:24:34,400 --> 00:24:36,359
Speaker 1: were at a completely different level. This is you know,

478
00:24:36,359 --> 00:24:39,560
Speaker 1: I don't even want to compare where you know, Jlo

479
00:24:39,680 --> 00:24:42,280
Speaker 1: and Ben are and where we were, But would you

480
00:24:42,359 --> 00:24:47,119
Speaker 1: say that knowing that people were not only taking pictures

481
00:24:47,119 --> 00:24:50,040
Speaker 1: and looking at every single facial expression we had or

482
00:24:50,040 --> 00:24:54,479
Speaker 1: everything we did, or everything everywhere we went. Do you

483
00:24:54,600 --> 00:24:58,760
Speaker 1: think that that affected our relationship in any way.

484
00:25:00,000 --> 00:25:03,320
Speaker 2: No, we didn't worry about it being when we were

485
00:25:03,359 --> 00:25:05,880
Speaker 2: out because you and I decided not to be out

486
00:25:05,960 --> 00:25:09,439
Speaker 2: very much. So we it was the worst part. When

487
00:25:09,440 --> 00:25:12,200
Speaker 2: we went to Miami. We were actually trying to get away.

488
00:25:12,920 --> 00:25:15,120
Speaker 2: We were got out of here to hide and make

489
00:25:15,160 --> 00:25:20,120
Speaker 2: sure we weren't in the public eye. And somebody, yes,

490
00:25:20,200 --> 00:25:22,920
Speaker 2: at a restaurant, some family of four, I'll never forget

491
00:25:22,960 --> 00:25:27,600
Speaker 2: those folks took some pictures of us at at lunch.

492
00:25:28,240 --> 00:25:32,159
Speaker 2: They get word to some press outlet, photographer comes, pictures

493
00:25:32,200 --> 00:25:35,600
Speaker 2: are taken of us, and then we get scrutinized for

494
00:25:36,680 --> 00:25:39,240
Speaker 2: look at them, they're flaunting or I can't remember, you remember,

495
00:25:39,280 --> 00:25:40,760
Speaker 2: you know what I'm talking about. But the words that

496
00:25:40,800 --> 00:25:44,359
Speaker 2: were used were attached to it were the exact opposite

497
00:25:44,440 --> 00:25:46,720
Speaker 2: of what we were trying to do. We went there

498
00:25:46,760 --> 00:25:49,080
Speaker 2: to hide, and the only reason we were found out

499
00:25:49,200 --> 00:25:51,680
Speaker 2: is because a family of four sitting next to us

500
00:25:51,680 --> 00:25:56,159
Speaker 2: with their two infant children decided to take pictures. And

501
00:25:56,280 --> 00:26:00,720
Speaker 2: so that is the part I guess with you when

502
00:26:00,760 --> 00:26:04,720
Speaker 2: you ask about did it affect our relationship? We hit

503
00:26:04,920 --> 00:26:07,160
Speaker 2: so we didn't do anything different in the public eye.

504
00:26:07,200 --> 00:26:08,880
Speaker 2: So I never felt like we had to put on

505
00:26:09,520 --> 00:26:11,200
Speaker 2: or make sure we always put on a good face.

506
00:26:11,920 --> 00:26:16,119
Speaker 2: Wet I shouldn't say caught. We were seeing photographed at

507
00:26:16,119 --> 00:26:19,080
Speaker 2: times when we didn't know anybody was watching. And I'll

508
00:26:19,080 --> 00:26:23,159
Speaker 2: be damned, we looked happy all the time. That's weird,

509
00:26:24,400 --> 00:26:27,119
Speaker 2: but that was just us. But I know our relationship.

510
00:26:27,320 --> 00:26:29,800
Speaker 2: I never I've said to you, I felt some kind

511
00:26:29,840 --> 00:26:35,639
Speaker 2: of respond like, I feel a like folks are looking

512
00:26:35,680 --> 00:26:37,919
Speaker 2: and waiting on you to either get married or break up,

513
00:26:38,640 --> 00:26:40,560
Speaker 2: and that feels weird.

514
00:26:40,760 --> 00:26:44,040
Speaker 1: Yeah, and we did look happy most of the time,

515
00:26:44,040 --> 00:26:47,080
Speaker 1: but there were times I remember where like it was

516
00:26:47,119 --> 00:26:50,560
Speaker 1: cold outside and so you're grimacing, and you know, then they,

517
00:26:50,640 --> 00:26:52,720
Speaker 1: you know, they make a comment about what that says

518
00:26:52,720 --> 00:26:55,399
Speaker 1: about our relationship. They even have body language experts, and

519
00:26:55,400 --> 00:26:58,639
Speaker 1: I see them doing it to so many celebrities about

520
00:26:58,680 --> 00:27:01,760
Speaker 1: how you're walking together, how you're holding hands, if someone's

521
00:27:01,760 --> 00:27:04,520
Speaker 1: holding more tightly on the other, it's it's remarkable. And

522
00:27:04,520 --> 00:27:08,840
Speaker 1: then people you read it and it feels like that

523
00:27:08,960 --> 00:27:11,480
Speaker 1: must be what is And I just I would urge

524
00:27:11,520 --> 00:27:14,640
Speaker 1: everyone to just not believe what you read and not

525
00:27:14,680 --> 00:27:20,119
Speaker 1: believe unnamed sources and certainly don't give any real credence

526
00:27:20,160 --> 00:27:22,800
Speaker 1: to body language experts who are claiming this, that and

527
00:27:22,800 --> 00:27:24,680
Speaker 1: the other. But I mean, I just if anyone could have,

528
00:27:25,000 --> 00:27:27,000
Speaker 1: if anyone could imagine what that would be like for

529
00:27:27,040 --> 00:27:30,879
Speaker 1: them personally, I don't. It's not fun at all. And

530
00:27:31,240 --> 00:27:35,320
Speaker 1: I think then there's the the s there's a a

531
00:27:35,440 --> 00:27:40,440
Speaker 1: belief that somehow, whether whoever, whatever couple it is, even

532
00:27:40,480 --> 00:27:42,639
Speaker 1: we were even accused of this, of them calling the

533
00:27:42,640 --> 00:27:45,720
Speaker 1: paparazzi on ourselves to get attention, because we constantly just

534
00:27:45,800 --> 00:27:48,719
Speaker 1: want attention and we're trying to prove something that this,

535
00:27:48,800 --> 00:27:51,919
Speaker 1: that or the other. I cannot imagine that goes on

536
00:27:51,960 --> 00:27:53,760
Speaker 1: as much as people think it does. I mean, we

537
00:27:53,800 --> 00:28:00,040
Speaker 1: certainly never once ever wanted, let alone leaked where we

538
00:28:00,200 --> 00:28:02,960
Speaker 1: going to be or how we wanted to be photographed.

539
00:28:03,000 --> 00:28:05,600
Speaker 1: I mean, that's laughable to me that people really believe that,

540
00:28:05,680 --> 00:28:07,919
Speaker 1: But they do, and it's out there, and I just

541
00:28:08,560 --> 00:28:10,760
Speaker 1: I hope that we can all just be a little

542
00:28:10,760 --> 00:28:13,240
Speaker 1: bit better about letting people live their lives and really

543
00:28:13,280 --> 00:28:16,879
Speaker 1: allowing people to have private lives. I mean, I really

544
00:28:16,920 --> 00:28:19,520
Speaker 1: believe everyone deserves a private life.

545
00:28:19,520 --> 00:28:21,720
Speaker 2: See that's what everybody will a lot of folks will

546
00:28:21,720 --> 00:28:24,080
Speaker 2: object and shut you down. Because she put out a

547
00:28:24,400 --> 00:28:27,480
Speaker 2: movie that's an hour and a half of her promoting

548
00:28:27,520 --> 00:28:30,679
Speaker 2: her relationship. She put out a documentary about that movie.

549
00:28:30,720 --> 00:28:33,159
Speaker 2: She's got four hours of content in which she is

550
00:28:33,200 --> 00:28:39,160
Speaker 2: putting her personal life out there. Now, obviously there are

551
00:28:39,400 --> 00:28:41,600
Speaker 2: music critics. They can say whatever they want about her music,

552
00:28:41,600 --> 00:28:43,880
Speaker 2: but she is putting herself out there in such a

553
00:28:43,880 --> 00:28:49,000
Speaker 2: way that is Criticism is one thing, you know, but

554
00:28:49,880 --> 00:28:54,040
Speaker 2: bullying and hate and that's a totally, totally different thing.

555
00:28:54,080 --> 00:28:56,920
Speaker 2: We are not sitting here endorsing you should never say

556
00:28:56,920 --> 00:28:59,520
Speaker 2: anything about her just because she's in the public eye. No,

557
00:29:00,000 --> 00:29:03,360
Speaker 2: I don't know. She put herself out there, but there

558
00:29:03,480 --> 00:29:07,280
Speaker 2: is an entertainment value that comes to trying to tear

559
00:29:07,360 --> 00:29:11,800
Speaker 2: somebody down and to constantly gossip, which we've talked about

560
00:29:11,840 --> 00:29:15,280
Speaker 2: plenty privately, but also here on this The gossip is

561
00:29:15,320 --> 00:29:18,400
Speaker 2: one of the most toxic things out there, and we

562
00:29:18,480 --> 00:29:22,160
Speaker 2: have all been guilty of it, but we just I

563
00:29:22,200 --> 00:29:24,680
Speaker 2: would encourage everybody, and I've had to get better about it,

564
00:29:24,720 --> 00:29:29,360
Speaker 2: and I'm you gotta stop being a part of that

565
00:29:29,480 --> 00:29:34,880
Speaker 2: cycle of contributing to tearing somebody down. It's making fun

566
00:29:34,920 --> 00:29:37,480
Speaker 2: of her I'm not gonna make fun of her because

567
00:29:37,520 --> 00:29:40,200
Speaker 2: she's had four marriages. I'm not gonna make fun of

568
00:29:40,240 --> 00:29:43,040
Speaker 2: her because she's had three failed marriages. You know, just

569
00:29:43,120 --> 00:29:47,680
Speaker 2: cracking a joke about it. Is it seems me and

570
00:29:47,800 --> 00:29:51,240
Speaker 2: folks say, ah, you got thicker scan, you can handle it. Okay, fine,

571
00:29:51,280 --> 00:29:51,400
Speaker 2: is it?

572
00:29:51,440 --> 00:29:54,000
Speaker 4: Girl's got really thick, much thicker skin to me, give

573
00:29:54,040 --> 00:29:57,360
Speaker 4: me what she's done. She does, absolutely, But how we

574
00:29:57,440 --> 00:30:01,840
Speaker 4: have we ask yourself, how are you contributing to tearing

575
00:30:01,920 --> 00:30:07,640
Speaker 4: down another human being? How are you contributing to the fodder,

576
00:30:07,720 --> 00:30:12,959
Speaker 4: the gossip, the foolishness, and the entertainment of somebody's private

577
00:30:13,000 --> 00:30:13,840
Speaker 4: life and pain?

578
00:30:14,240 --> 00:30:16,959
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean I think we've seen it happen. It's

579
00:30:17,000 --> 00:30:19,120
Speaker 1: going to continue to happen, obviously, because there's money to

580
00:30:19,160 --> 00:30:21,400
Speaker 1: be made. I think that's the other thing, this idea

581
00:30:21,440 --> 00:30:24,880
Speaker 1: that every time you're clicking or every time you're reading,

582
00:30:24,960 --> 00:30:28,640
Speaker 1: you are contributing to someone profiting off of someone else's

583
00:30:28,720 --> 00:30:31,640
Speaker 1: pain or potential pain, or even created false pain. But

584
00:30:31,680 --> 00:30:34,400
Speaker 1: whatever it is, it's not something positive. So I just

585
00:30:34,480 --> 00:30:38,760
Speaker 1: I I after everything I've learned in the past year

586
00:30:38,760 --> 00:30:40,960
Speaker 1: and a half, I have I have learned to do

587
00:30:41,000 --> 00:30:43,120
Speaker 1: better and be better when it comes to literally even

588
00:30:43,160 --> 00:30:45,920
Speaker 1: clicking on these stories. Oh but yeah, we just wanted

589
00:30:45,960 --> 00:30:47,600
Speaker 1: to We just wanted to throw some love out there

590
00:30:48,240 --> 00:30:52,360
Speaker 1: and just remind everybody that what you read is not

591
00:30:52,960 --> 00:30:55,920
Speaker 1: almost certainly not. It's what's going on, and there might

592
00:30:55,960 --> 00:30:59,000
Speaker 1: be there could be a there could be a small

593
00:30:59,720 --> 00:31:02,080
Speaker 1: small part of it that that's true, and none of

594
00:31:02,120 --> 00:31:04,920
Speaker 1: it could be true. But just to suspend judgment and

595
00:31:05,040 --> 00:31:08,680
Speaker 1: to remember not to believe what you read and to

596
00:31:08,720 --> 00:31:11,440
Speaker 1: get people a break. And we're all humans. We've said

597
00:31:11,480 --> 00:31:13,040
Speaker 1: that so many times, but no matter who you are,

598
00:31:13,080 --> 00:31:15,120
Speaker 1: no matter what you do for a living, we all

599
00:31:15,160 --> 00:31:17,920
Speaker 1: have feelings and it matters, and what you say, what

600
00:31:17,960 --> 00:31:20,320
Speaker 1: you think, and my god, what you write, what you

601
00:31:20,400 --> 00:31:23,600
Speaker 1: post matters, anonymous or not, you still put it out there.

602
00:31:23,640 --> 00:31:25,840
Speaker 1: So just please please, please be kind.

603
00:31:27,200 --> 00:31:34,800
Speaker 2: Be kind to us too. By the way, that's really

604
00:31:34,800 --> 00:31:37,320
Speaker 2: all this episode was about. We're just getting back to

605
00:31:37,440 --> 00:31:42,760
Speaker 2: us and what we're trying to say is no, folks, no,

606
00:31:42,800 --> 00:31:44,560
Speaker 2: we appreciate you listening as all the ways. You can

607
00:31:44,560 --> 00:31:48,239
Speaker 2: find us on Instagram official page four. The podcast is

608
00:31:48,280 --> 00:31:51,360
Speaker 2: at Amy and TJ Podcast. We'll see ye'l s in

609
00:32:01,040 --> 00:32:02,480
Speaker 2: the Two Things