1 00:00:05,680 --> 00:00:08,960 Speaker 1: It's the radio segment that's encouraging shoppers to buy the 2 00:00:09,039 --> 00:00:12,600 Speaker 1: hot new tech toy this year, the gravy. 3 00:00:12,119 --> 00:00:13,400 Speaker 2: Fit smart watch. 4 00:00:14,560 --> 00:00:17,840 Speaker 1: It counts your steps, tracks your heart rate, and most importantly, 5 00:00:18,120 --> 00:00:21,200 Speaker 1: dispenses warm gravy out the side every time you hit 6 00:00:21,239 --> 00:00:26,160 Speaker 1: five hundred calories. Oh screw the potatoes, drip it straight 7 00:00:26,239 --> 00:00:30,560 Speaker 1: into your mouth. With Laser stories, the segmentary read weird 8 00:00:30,560 --> 00:00:32,519 Speaker 1: news stories around the globe, just like everyone else does, 9 00:00:32,560 --> 00:00:35,600 Speaker 1: except we've got a laser. These other sauce bosses just don't. 10 00:00:36,000 --> 00:00:37,879 Speaker 1: His first laser story is out of the Place. That's 11 00:00:38,000 --> 00:00:40,040 Speaker 1: number one in our hearts and number one on the 12 00:00:40,080 --> 00:00:45,199 Speaker 1: police scanners. Florida, forty one year old man named Anthony 13 00:00:45,280 --> 00:00:48,360 Speaker 1: Day was recently spotted marching down the middle of a 14 00:00:48,360 --> 00:00:50,320 Speaker 1: suburban street smiling and waving. 15 00:00:51,000 --> 00:00:53,120 Speaker 2: Oh yeah. He was also completely nude. 16 00:00:54,320 --> 00:00:57,200 Speaker 3: Wow, he's doing the slow streak. 17 00:00:57,600 --> 00:00:59,440 Speaker 4: You know what I mean. Don't run, you just really 18 00:00:59,480 --> 00:01:00,120 Speaker 4: show it off. 19 00:01:00,400 --> 00:01:03,800 Speaker 2: Yeah, that's the weird turkey trot for sure. On top 20 00:01:03,840 --> 00:01:05,480 Speaker 2: of that, it wasn't warm out. 21 00:01:05,560 --> 00:01:09,399 Speaker 1: The temperature was only thirty six degrees and Anthony wasn't 22 00:01:09,400 --> 00:01:10,600 Speaker 1: even wearing socks. 23 00:01:11,319 --> 00:01:13,759 Speaker 4: Okay, oh wow, Well, I mean that's his excuse, right 24 00:01:14,040 --> 00:01:16,520 Speaker 4: that it was pulled out. Oh, yes, he wanted to 25 00:01:16,560 --> 00:01:18,920 Speaker 4: make sure that was part of this news story. So 26 00:01:18,959 --> 00:01:22,520 Speaker 4: everybody came across the photos anyway. 27 00:01:22,760 --> 00:01:27,559 Speaker 1: A driver saw him and they called police, and cops 28 00:01:27,600 --> 00:01:29,800 Speaker 1: asked to Anthony what was going on, and he said 29 00:01:29,840 --> 00:01:33,640 Speaker 1: something about it being a TikTok prank, but he didn't 30 00:01:33,640 --> 00:01:34,840 Speaker 1: even have a phone on him. 31 00:01:35,600 --> 00:01:38,760 Speaker 4: Where would you keep it, Jeff, Yeah, there's a drone 32 00:01:38,800 --> 00:01:39,760 Speaker 4: above the clouds filming. 33 00:01:39,880 --> 00:01:40,039 Speaker 2: Yeah. 34 00:01:40,080 --> 00:01:41,120 Speaker 3: Yeah, sure. 35 00:01:41,560 --> 00:01:43,960 Speaker 1: He also didn't want to answer any more questions to 36 00:01:44,240 --> 00:01:49,280 Speaker 1: protect his privacy, initially gave the officers a fake name 37 00:01:49,400 --> 00:01:50,240 Speaker 1: and a fake. 38 00:01:50,040 --> 00:01:51,680 Speaker 2: Address to privacy. 39 00:01:51,800 --> 00:01:55,520 Speaker 1: Yes, and he was charged with indecent exposure, disorderly conduct, 40 00:01:55,560 --> 00:01:57,600 Speaker 1: and resisting an officer without violence. 41 00:01:57,880 --> 00:02:01,680 Speaker 2: So he was booked in jail. Still make Oh my. 42 00:02:01,640 --> 00:02:04,000 Speaker 4: Gosh, it's just kind of serving him up. 43 00:02:03,960 --> 00:02:04,520 Speaker 3: Right, Yeah. 44 00:02:04,680 --> 00:02:04,920 Speaker 4: Wow. 45 00:02:05,320 --> 00:02:08,799 Speaker 1: Maybe more impressively, he's still sticking with his story, telling 46 00:02:08,840 --> 00:02:12,000 Speaker 1: guards that he's still doing the TikTok challenge and they 47 00:02:12,000 --> 00:02:14,200 Speaker 1: should smile more because they're on video. 48 00:02:15,880 --> 00:02:16,920 Speaker 3: That's where the camera is. 49 00:02:17,040 --> 00:02:19,840 Speaker 4: I keep waiting for you to say something about drugs, 50 00:02:19,880 --> 00:02:21,119 Speaker 4: but I haven't heard that yet. 51 00:02:21,280 --> 00:02:24,320 Speaker 2: No, this is just normal Florida behavior. Yeah, okay, typical. 52 00:02:25,639 --> 00:02:29,440 Speaker 1: The next laser story is out of California. Three adult 53 00:02:29,480 --> 00:02:32,240 Speaker 1: brothers got together recently to clean out their parents' house. 54 00:02:33,200 --> 00:02:35,240 Speaker 1: Their mom had passed away some time ago, and it 55 00:02:35,280 --> 00:02:37,480 Speaker 1: was time to get things organized and donate. 56 00:02:37,200 --> 00:02:38,680 Speaker 2: Stuff to the goodwill. 57 00:02:38,680 --> 00:02:40,919 Speaker 1: One of the brothers remember that their mom had said 58 00:02:41,120 --> 00:02:45,359 Speaker 1: she had some rare comics somewhere, apparently that she had 59 00:02:45,400 --> 00:02:48,560 Speaker 1: bought when she was nine years old in the depression era. 60 00:02:48,400 --> 00:02:49,399 Speaker 2: Of San Francisco. 61 00:02:49,680 --> 00:02:52,320 Speaker 1: That's cool, So the men looked all over the place 62 00:02:52,400 --> 00:02:55,320 Speaker 1: and finally found a dozen tucked away in an old 63 00:02:55,440 --> 00:02:56,680 Speaker 1: box inside the attic. 64 00:02:58,440 --> 00:02:59,239 Speaker 3: How much are they work? 65 00:02:59,560 --> 00:03:03,120 Speaker 1: One of the comics was titled Superman Number one from 66 00:03:03,280 --> 00:03:04,520 Speaker 1: nineteen thirty nine. 67 00:03:04,800 --> 00:03:07,240 Speaker 3: No, it's not The detective expression. 68 00:03:06,919 --> 00:03:11,000 Speaker 1: Turned out to be the very first superhero comic ever produced. 69 00:03:11,160 --> 00:03:16,160 Speaker 2: Wow, way, this is priceless. This Wow. It looked to 70 00:03:16,160 --> 00:03:17,720 Speaker 2: be a near pristine condition. 71 00:03:17,960 --> 00:03:20,280 Speaker 3: So the guys thought she mentioned it. 72 00:03:20,360 --> 00:03:22,320 Speaker 4: You noticed if she had it, they would have just 73 00:03:22,400 --> 00:03:24,080 Speaker 4: tossed a box without looking at it. 74 00:03:24,200 --> 00:03:26,360 Speaker 1: Yeah, guys took it to an auction house to have 75 00:03:26,400 --> 00:03:29,160 Speaker 1: it appraise, and this past weekend it just sold for 76 00:03:29,600 --> 00:03:31,160 Speaker 1: nine point one million. 77 00:03:31,280 --> 00:03:36,280 Speaker 4: Dollars, dang cheap in my book, cheap they can afford 78 00:03:36,320 --> 00:03:38,040 Speaker 4: to get somebody else to do the rest of the cleanout. 79 00:03:38,120 --> 00:03:40,840 Speaker 1: Yeah, that's a record for a comic book, and it's 80 00:03:40,920 --> 00:03:44,400 Speaker 1: not even close. The previous one was Action Comics number 81 00:03:44,400 --> 00:03:46,840 Speaker 1: one from nineteen thirty eight. That's what I thought was 82 00:03:46,960 --> 00:03:50,960 Speaker 1: That one sold for a measily six million just last year. 83 00:03:51,400 --> 00:03:54,840 Speaker 4: You might as well use it as scraps toilet paper. 84 00:03:55,840 --> 00:03:57,800 Speaker 1: Let's go to your next laser story out of the 85 00:03:57,920 --> 00:04:02,520 Speaker 1: Hogy Help Desk, Delicious Snow Secret. Businesses are kind of 86 00:04:02,560 --> 00:04:05,560 Speaker 1: struggling right now, but Panera Bread has a plan to 87 00:04:05,600 --> 00:04:08,960 Speaker 1: turn it all around. Oh and that plan is cutting 88 00:04:09,040 --> 00:04:10,480 Speaker 1: their tomatoes. 89 00:04:13,240 --> 00:04:13,840 Speaker 4: An issue. 90 00:04:13,880 --> 00:04:14,280 Speaker 2: That's right. 91 00:04:14,320 --> 00:04:17,720 Speaker 1: They weren't before, but promise by management next year, every 92 00:04:17,880 --> 00:04:21,719 Speaker 1: salad offered at Panera will have cut cherry tomatoes. 93 00:04:21,800 --> 00:04:25,440 Speaker 3: Whoa the cherry little palpable? 94 00:04:26,520 --> 00:04:28,800 Speaker 4: Well, hey, listen, this is gonna turn their whole thing around. 95 00:04:29,200 --> 00:04:30,960 Speaker 2: Yeah, this is groundbreaking. 96 00:04:31,000 --> 00:04:33,159 Speaker 1: It's all part of how they're gonna reverse course on 97 00:04:33,360 --> 00:04:37,200 Speaker 1: cost cutting moves that shrank salads and sandwiches, and that 98 00:04:37,320 --> 00:04:39,880 Speaker 1: choice backfired big time on them and led to a 99 00:04:40,000 --> 00:04:42,320 Speaker 1: huge drop in customers and sales. 100 00:04:43,000 --> 00:04:44,960 Speaker 4: So they got into the boardroom and they're like, all right, 101 00:04:45,000 --> 00:04:45,840 Speaker 4: how are we gonna take this? 102 00:04:46,000 --> 00:04:46,320 Speaker 2: Guys? 103 00:04:46,640 --> 00:04:49,320 Speaker 1: That's right, the CEO said. The new strategy is the 104 00:04:49,360 --> 00:04:54,040 Speaker 1: complete opposite. It's called Panera Rise, and it includes plans 105 00:04:54,040 --> 00:04:57,799 Speaker 1: to refresh old interiors, put more money into labor, open 106 00:04:57,880 --> 00:05:01,120 Speaker 1: some new locations, and make sandwiches big and cut those 107 00:05:01,320 --> 00:05:03,560 Speaker 1: darn tomatoes. 108 00:05:06,720 --> 00:05:10,680 Speaker 4: Investing in your own business could actually help profits. 109 00:05:10,800 --> 00:05:13,080 Speaker 1: Investing in your employees making them happier. 110 00:05:13,440 --> 00:05:16,479 Speaker 2: I know it sounds crazy to Yeah, that's gonna work. 111 00:05:16,600 --> 00:05:17,200 Speaker 3: That's not the. 112 00:05:17,120 --> 00:05:19,080 Speaker 2: American way, the CEO said. 113 00:05:19,120 --> 00:05:22,279 Speaker 1: We've made the guests chase the cherry tomato around the bowl, 114 00:05:22,760 --> 00:05:25,359 Speaker 1: but next year that finally ends. 115 00:05:25,400 --> 00:05:26,440 Speaker 3: Wow, can't. 116 00:05:26,880 --> 00:05:28,760 Speaker 4: It was a whole reason I didn't get lunch there. 117 00:05:28,920 --> 00:05:30,120 Speaker 3: Yeah, it was. 118 00:05:30,279 --> 00:05:31,320 Speaker 2: It's a whole new world. 119 00:05:31,440 --> 00:05:35,400 Speaker 1: Let's go to your final laser story out of Turkey Headquarters. 120 00:05:35,000 --> 00:05:37,960 Speaker 3: Day with the Country the birds, either one. 121 00:05:38,120 --> 00:05:39,520 Speaker 2: We're going with the bird on this one. 122 00:05:39,760 --> 00:05:42,120 Speaker 1: No matter how serious you are about your diet, the 123 00:05:42,160 --> 00:05:46,520 Speaker 1: biggest challenge of the year for most people is Thanksgiving. 124 00:05:46,240 --> 00:05:51,279 Speaker 4: Gets all carve you mean challenges how much can I eat? 125 00:05:51,480 --> 00:05:55,159 Speaker 1: Right? Sure, it's a holiday where it's virtually impossible to 126 00:05:55,200 --> 00:05:56,039 Speaker 1: count calories. 127 00:05:56,160 --> 00:05:58,600 Speaker 3: Why would you? Who does take the day off? 128 00:05:58,680 --> 00:06:00,400 Speaker 2: Brook Thing's diet means die from it. 129 00:06:00,640 --> 00:06:07,000 Speaker 1: Yeah, well, a new report decided to do it for you, 130 00:06:07,600 --> 00:06:10,799 Speaker 1: Jeff getting echoed. It looked at how many calories people 131 00:06:10,839 --> 00:06:12,360 Speaker 1: are downing at the Thanksgiving tea? 132 00:06:12,600 --> 00:06:14,159 Speaker 3: Is this the information you're going to bring to your 133 00:06:14,240 --> 00:06:15,919 Speaker 3: Thanksgiving to you? 134 00:06:15,960 --> 00:06:16,039 Speaker 2: Know? 135 00:06:16,080 --> 00:06:22,680 Speaker 3: How much galleryes you just take potatoes sugar hit the trade. 136 00:06:22,440 --> 00:06:27,080 Speaker 1: Means okay, you guys, blood sugar is dangerously low right now. 137 00:06:26,920 --> 00:06:28,200 Speaker 2: And someone needs to feed you. 138 00:06:30,200 --> 00:06:30,599 Speaker 3: Holiday. 139 00:06:30,680 --> 00:06:30,880 Speaker 2: Jeff. 140 00:06:31,560 --> 00:06:34,839 Speaker 1: Look, there's good news and bad news from you. First 141 00:06:34,839 --> 00:06:38,599 Speaker 1: of all, the average americans caloric intake during Thanksgiving is 142 00:06:38,960 --> 00:06:46,040 Speaker 1: just two thousand, one hundred calories hospital and looking okay, 143 00:06:46,080 --> 00:06:47,719 Speaker 1: it's not that's not that bad. 144 00:06:48,640 --> 00:06:52,040 Speaker 3: Jerry's pie is like fifteen hundred. That's gotta be before the. 145 00:06:51,960 --> 00:06:54,760 Speaker 5: Pie and the nutrition to say, two thousand calories a 146 00:06:54,839 --> 00:06:58,039 Speaker 5: day more than actually, according to dietary guidelines in the US, 147 00:06:58,080 --> 00:07:01,239 Speaker 5: adults should consume anywhere between six exteen hundred and three 148 00:07:01,279 --> 00:07:03,320 Speaker 5: thousand calories per day. 149 00:07:04,240 --> 00:07:06,120 Speaker 3: You know, it depends on what size the vehicle is. 150 00:07:06,160 --> 00:07:09,440 Speaker 1: You know, it also depends on age and weight and 151 00:07:09,480 --> 00:07:13,040 Speaker 1: your gender and maybe brooks of your addiction to desserts. 152 00:07:14,520 --> 00:07:15,120 Speaker 3: Tell me what a. 153 00:07:15,080 --> 00:07:17,880 Speaker 4: Whole peacan pie is and I will kill you now 154 00:07:17,880 --> 00:07:19,440 Speaker 4: of course that's that's what I'm going to eat. 155 00:07:19,560 --> 00:07:20,200 Speaker 3: Oh my god. 156 00:07:20,320 --> 00:07:23,120 Speaker 1: Stats are for the whole day, so the Thanksgiving number 157 00:07:23,360 --> 00:07:26,800 Speaker 1: is only in range if it's your only meal all 158 00:07:26,880 --> 00:07:31,680 Speaker 1: of Thursday, with no snacking, no leftovers. And I'm going 159 00:07:31,720 --> 00:07:34,320 Speaker 1: to say something You're not gonna like what no booze? 160 00:07:36,000 --> 00:07:36,920 Speaker 2: I know, Brook, I'm. 161 00:07:36,800 --> 00:07:39,720 Speaker 4: Sorry, And you gotta eat a little breakfast because you've 162 00:07:39,720 --> 00:07:40,880 Speaker 4: got a prime your stomach. 163 00:07:41,400 --> 00:07:42,640 Speaker 3: You can't go on empty als. 164 00:07:42,640 --> 00:07:44,360 Speaker 4: It'll shrink, it won't be big enough to take it 165 00:07:44,360 --> 00:07:44,640 Speaker 4: all in. 166 00:07:44,720 --> 00:07:47,120 Speaker 1: Ges right, So yeah, that all that, that's the bad 167 00:07:47,200 --> 00:07:50,440 Speaker 1: news part, which just proves my point. Everybody has to 168 00:07:50,480 --> 00:07:55,680 Speaker 1: be careful around Thanksgiving, like this guy he saw the 169 00:07:55,720 --> 00:07:57,840 Speaker 1: slow cooker out and thought it was a tanning bit 170 00:07:58,280 --> 00:08:03,080 Speaker 1: for all the right inside, I am saying, be careful. 171 00:08:03,720 --> 00:08:05,880 Speaker 1: And that sound means Laser Stories has come to an 172 00:08:06,000 --> 00:08:09,119 Speaker 1: end for the day. And also our turtle appetizers are ready. 173 00:08:10,080 --> 00:08:11,520 Speaker 2: Let's thanks you. 174 00:08:11,800 --> 00:08:14,320 Speaker 5: You're the one who said eat more bro turtle toes 175 00:08:14,360 --> 00:08:14,760 Speaker 5: on us. 176 00:08:14,840 --> 00:08:17,200 Speaker 1: This sal means Laser Stories has come to an end 177 00:08:17,240 --> 00:08:20,120 Speaker 1: for the day. We'll do it again, same time on Wednesday.